338. Quick Thinks: 5 Techniques for a Better Sleep & Better Communication

“Sleep is essential to good performance and good communication.” A good night's sleep can make all the difference in how we think, feel, and communicate. But for anyone who struggles to fall asleep, worrying about getting enough rest can become part of the problem. In this Quick Thinks episode of Think Fast, Talk Smart https://www.fastersmarter.io/, Matt Abrahams shares his personal struggles with sleep and the strategies that have helped him rest easier. Drawing on advice from past guests, including Cheri Mah and Andrew Huberman, Matt introduces his ABCDE framework for better sleep, offering practical tips for managing bedtime anxiety, calming a racing mind, and building healthier sleep habits so you can show up at your best. Takeaways: Better sleep starts with managing your mind. Journaling, reframing negative thoughts, and practicing deep breathing can help reduce bedtime anxiety and quiet a racing mind. Small changes can make a big difference in sleep quality. Limiting caffeine, creating a comfortable sleep environment, and maintaining a consistent bedtime routine can help you rest better and show up more effectively in your daily communication. Activity: Quiet your mind. Before bed tonight, spend five minutes writing down anything that's worrying you, followed by three things you're grateful for. Notice whether getting your thoughts onto paper helps you feel more relaxed and ready for sleep. Episode Reference Links: Ep.287 Give It a Rest to Do Your Best: The Sleep Habits That Catalyze Your Communication https://www.fastersmarter.io/think-fast-talk-smart-communication-techniques/sleep-habits-communication/Ep.274 Choose Connection Over Perfection: Why Happiness Starts with Better Communication https://www.fastersmarter.io/choose-connection-over-perfection/Ep. 109 Simplify! How to Communicate Complex Ideas Simply and Effectively https://www.fastersmarter.io/109-simplify-how-to-communicate-complex-ideas-simply-and-effectively/Ep. 270 Make Belief: The Mindset Shifts That Make Your Communication Stronger https://www.fastersmarter.io/mindset-shifts-communication/Ep.33 Hacking your Speaking Anxiety: How Lessons from Neuroscience Can Help You Communicate Confidently https://www.fastersmarter.io/33-hacking-your-speaking-anxiety-how-lessons-from-neuroscience-can-help-you-communicate-confidentl/ Connect: Premium Signup >>>> Think Fast Talk Smart Premium https://www.fastersmarter.io/premium/Email Questions & Feedback >>> [email protected] Transcripts >>>Think Fast Talk Smart Website https://www.fastersmarter.io/338-quick-thinks-5-techniques-for-a-better-sleep-better-communication/Newsletter Signup + English Language Learning >>>FasterSmarter.io http://fastersmarter.io/Think Fast Talk Smart >>>LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/company/think-fast-talk-smart/,Instagram https://www.instagram.com/thinkfasttalksmart/, YouTube https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL6caGRBUYZCmgDGM2RK6mxKB9jG_ccmm3Matt Abrahams >>>LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/maabrahams/ https://learning.fastersmarter.io/?redirect_from=podpageChapters: (00:00) - Introduction (01:04) - A: Managing Emotions (01:53) - B: Building Better Sleep Habits (02:37) - C: Managing Your Thoughts (03:34) - D: Deep Breathing Techniques (04:23) - E: Creating the Right Sleep Environment (05:24) - Conclusion ******** Thank you to our sponsors. These partnerships support the ongoing production of the podcast, allowing us to bring it to you at no cost. Join our Think Fast Talk Smart Learning Community and become the communicator you want to be. https://learning.fastersmarter.io/?redirect_from=podpage

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Matt Abrahams?

  Hi, Matt here. In the moment, conflict is difficult for everyone. In our October newsletter, out now, you will learn ways to help yourself handle these challenges better. Not only do you get specific advice, we're also providing an infographic to help you remember. Find our newsletter on the Think Fast, Talk Smart LinkedIn page or at fastersmarter.io under Resources. Now, a word from our sponsors. Their support covers the cost of production, allowing us to bring you this episode free of charge. Having expertise is valuable, but if you want to build something from what you know, people need an easy way to find you and understand what you can offer them. Squarespace can help you do that. You can build a professional website that showcases your work and turn your expertise into services

• 0:44Matt Abrahams?

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• 1:29Matt Abrahams?

  Communication hygiene, proper nutrition, exercise, and sleep can make a huge difference in your success. I'm Matt Abrahams, and I teach strategic communication at Stanford Graduate School of Business. Welcome to this Quick Thinks episode of Think Fast, Talk Smart, the podcast. Of the three components of communication hygiene, sleep is my nemesis. As long as I can remember, I've been a bad sleeper. And after our episode 287 with sleep doctor Sheri Ma, many of you shared that you struggle with sleep too. So I thought I would pass along what I've learned about getting better sleep that has helped me a little bit. Some comes from my experience and others come from advice I've received

• 2:11Matt Abrahams?

  over our many Think Fast, Talk Smart episode guests. I'd like to organize this around the A, B, C, D, E of good sleep. So let's get started with A, affect. How you feel. Because I know I'm a bad sleeper, I often get stressed about going to bed and worrying about not sleeping and thus having a bad day when I wake up. To help counter this worry, I journal. Part of my journaling focuses on what I'm worrying about. I find getting it out on paper helps remove it from my mind. I also follow the advice of Sonia Lubomirsky, who shared in episode 274 that gratitude journaling can really help. So I write down things I'm thankful for.

• 2:55Matt Abrahams?

  And this also dials down my worry about sleep. Finally, I try to ground myself physically by feeling my body on the bed. Focusing on the physical helps me stop the negative feelings. Moving from affect, A, to B, behavioral. To help me prepare for sleep, I follow Dr. Ma's advice and limit my caffeine intake and stop drinking it early in the afternoon. I also am fortunate enough to be able to take quick power naps. And I do this around 2 o'clock every day for about 15 minutes. And I awaken refreshed. Before bed, I like to do some light stretching to relax my body. I take a warm shower. It also helps a lot.

• 3:40Matt Abrahams?

  And as I shared with Francis Fry in episode 109, I like to watch five minutes of comedy before I go to bed. Laughing helps me feel more relaxed and it puts a smile on my face. From affect to behavior to C, cognition. My thoughts can get in the way of my sleep. Turning off my brain is really hard. Niraj El helped me come up with a mantra I like. In episode 270, he suggested saying, "The body knows what the body needs." I find this takes a lot of pressure off me. My body knows what it needs, and if it needs sleep, it'll get it. I also use a technique called cognitive disruption. Here's how it plays out for me.

• 4:25Matt Abrahams?

  I take an eight or nine-letter word and I try to make 10 words from that word. Often, they're smaller. And I find this refocuses my brain. It gets me out of my own way. Finally, I remind myself of Dr. Ma's reframing of sleep not as the end of today, but the beginning of tomorrow. And it gets me excited. It changes the way I approach it all. So we have the A, the B, the C, and now the D. D is one technique and one technique only. D stands for deep breathing. This gets its own call out because it's so important. Breath work can really help calm you down. When Andrew Huberman was on the show,

• 5:09Matt Abrahams?

  he taught us many different powers of breath and the way to do it. This was all in episode 33, and you can check it out. The technique I like to use is box breathing, where you inhale for a certain count, hold for that same count, exhale on that count, and then hold and start over. I like to do a count of six. So we've talked about affect, behavior, cognition, and deep breathing. The final of these techniques is the environment. I try to keep my room nice and cool. Being too hot makes it hard for me to go to sleep. I like to take as much light out of the space as possible and keep things quiet.

• 5:54Matt Abrahams?

  I put my phone outside the room. Taken together, the A, B, C, D, E's of sleep hygiene really helped me to sleep better. It's a lot of steps. I don't do each and every one every night, but I know I can rely on them to help me. Finally, if you go to bed and wake up at the same time each night, you'll be better off because that habit gets ingrained and you'll do better. Sleep is essential to good performance and good communication. It is my hope that some of these techniques that helped me will help you in your sleep and your sleep communication hygiene. Have a good night.

• 6:40Matt Abrahams?

  Thanks for joining us for this Quick Thinks episode of Think Fast, Talk Smart, the podcast. Please check out more of our back catalog items to find helpful information. This episode was produced by Catherine Reed, Alex McCarthy, Ryan Campos, and me, Matt Abrahams, with special thanks to the Stanford GSB video team. Our music is from Floyd Wonder. And thank you to Podium Podcast Company. Please find us on YouTube and wherever you get your podcasts. Be sure to subscribe and rate us. Also, follow us on LinkedIn, TikTok, and Instagram. And check out fastersmarter.io for deep dive videos, English language learning content, and our newsletter. Please consider joining

• 7:24Matt Abrahams?

  our Think Fast, Talk Smart learning community at fastersmarter.io/learning. You'll find video lessons, learning quests, discussion boards, an AI coach, and book club opportunities. Again, that's fastersmarter.io/learning to become part of our Think Fast, Talk Smart learning community.

• 7:57Matt Abrahams?

  Before we wrap up, I just want to say thank you for listening. It really means a lot to hear how people all over the world are using these ideas in their own lives. It inspires me and the whole team that brings you this show. If you want more episodes and resources, feel free to follow, subscribe, and explore past conversations. We're grateful for your support of Think Fast, Talk Smart.