Please Keep Me Anonymous with Chris Addison and Philippa Dunne

This week, Chris and Rosie are joined by the brilliant comedian, writer, actor and director Chris Addison, alongside Motherland and Derry Girls star Philippa Dunne! They join Chris and Rosie to chat about their brand-new show, Tall Tales and Murder – which Chris and Rosie are already completely hooked on! Along the way, they get into everything from cats and auditions to Philippa’s rather unusual fear, Catholic guilt and plenty more! You can catch Tall Tales and Murder on BBC One every Tuesday at 10.40pm, or binge-watch the entire series on BBC Iplayer! If you want to get involved and have your stories and voice notes included on the podcast, then get in touch! 📧: [email protected] 📱: 07874 406650 You can watch the podcast on the Shagged Married Annoyed YouTube channel: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠youtube.com/@shagged.married.annoyed Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

• 0:00Speaker 00

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• 0:12Speaker 01

  Pricing participation may vary. Promotion pricing may be lower than meal pricing.

• 0:15Speaker 02

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• 0:42Speaker 03

  Hello, you are listening to Shag Maradonoid. Please keep me anonymous.

• 0:44Speaker 04

  And this week we are joined by Chris Addison and Philip Adun. And they are on talking about Tall Tales and Murder, the new drama on BBC One. And we love it, don't we?

• 0:53Speaker 03

  We're currently binging it. We will tell you all about it. It's really genuinely very, very good.

• 0:58Speaker 04

  Yeah, now I know Chris from stand-up from years ago. And many people have seen him in the thick of it. And Philip Adun's obviously in Amandaland as well. And it was just have a really good chat and a really good laugh with them. And the show, if you want to catch it weekly, it is on Tuesdays, 10:40 PM on BBC One. Or you can just binge the whole thing on iPlayer, like what we're doing. That's Tall Tales and Murder. Enjoy that and enjoy this episode.

• 1:40Speaker 03

  Oh, we love Veep. We've got to talk about, oh. Oh, God, yeah.

• 1:43Speaker 05

  It's a nice show.

• 1:44Speaker 03

  There's a lot of them. In Wonderland, also. There's just, this is so, thank you so much, guys, for coming on.

• 1:49Speaker 04

  Come here, you.

• 1:50Speaker 03

  What's the matter?

• 1:51Speaker 06

  That, I think that could be a hole.

• 1:52Speaker 04

  What is it, a hole?

• 1:53Speaker 06

  There is a hole.

• 1:53Speaker 04

  Do you want some Wonder Web?

• 1:54Speaker 06

  No, do you know what I was gonna do? I was gonna get a Sharpie.

• 1:57Speaker 04

  Yeah, just call it a shower in black. Yeah, you want a black spray on your shoulder.

• 2:01Speaker 03

  You've got a little hole in there?

• 2:02Speaker 06

  Yeah, because I've got two cats. And I'd say one of them, one of them just did that. And I'm kind of like, do you know what? Little shit.

• 2:07Speaker 03

  Have you got, um?

• 2:08Speaker 06

  Yeah, two kitten, no, one kitten and one six-year-old. And they're both Devon Rexes.

• 2:14Speaker 04

  Oh, yeah.

• 2:14Speaker 06

  So they're like, they're like.

• 2:15Speaker 04

  They're on your shoulder?

• 2:16Speaker 06

  Yeah, all the time.

• 2:17Speaker 04

  The peeply peep cats, yeah.

• 2:18Speaker 06

  Yeah, and they love being elevated, so they will try and climb on your head.

• 2:22Speaker 04

  Oh, I love them. That sounds like my kind of cat.

• 2:24Speaker 06

  Yeah, no, they're, oh, they're great cats.

• 2:25Speaker 05

  You want a ragdoll cat? That's what you want.

• 2:27Speaker 03

  We don't want.

• 2:27Speaker 05

  Because they are, yeah, you do. Because they are, they are.

• 2:29Speaker 04

  Chris has decided.

• 2:30Speaker 05

  They're basically dogs.

• 2:31Speaker 04

  Right, yeah.

• 2:32Speaker 05

  They're dogs dressed as cats, aren't they?

• 2:34Speaker 03

  They are beautiful.

• 2:34Speaker 06

  Baby dogs.

• 2:35Speaker 05

  They are so, yeah, they are goofy and hilarious and, yeah.

• 2:40Speaker 03

  I could be talking into anything. You could talk me into a cat. I really don't really like.

• 2:43Speaker 04

  I've said this before, you know Russell Kane? I went to Russell Kane's house once when I was supporting him in Southend, and he had these two cats, Keith and Wine.

• 2:53Speaker 04

  Absolute.

• 2:53Speaker 05

  All right, Russell, we've seen you.

• 2:54Speaker 04

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. We get, we get the schtick. Absolutely like dogs.

• 2:59Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 2:59Speaker 04

  I loved them. I loved them so much. And you can look, they were all over you. They weren't like, oh, they were like, aye, aye, aye. They wanted, and I was like, I'm needy.

• 3:07Speaker 06

  Cats get such a bad rep for being like aloof.

• 3:09Speaker 03

  I know, I know, they're not.

• 3:10Speaker 06

  They're not.

• 3:11Speaker 03

  See, I need something that would love us.

• 3:13Speaker 06

  Because every, every cat owner I know, they go, my cat's like a dog.

• 3:16Speaker 04

  Yeah, yeah.

• 3:17Speaker 06

  But they're just, but cats are like dogs.

• 3:19Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 3:19Speaker 06

  But like, cats and dogs are like, they, they love you, they want to be with you, they want to sleep in the bed, they want to sit in your lap, they want to say hello, they meet you at the door.

• 3:27Speaker 05

  Last night, Otto was basically between my feet all night.

• 3:31Speaker 03

  See, I could have that.

• 3:32Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 3:32Speaker 03

  And they are very cute, aren't they?

• 3:34Speaker 05

  I'll show you, I'll show you a picture after. Because they, honestly, because when, when, it's when my, when our very elderly sort of regular muggy cats died, my daughter was like 14, and she was, she'd, she was too old when, or they were too old when she came along originally for her to kind of have any relationship with them. So when they died, she said, please can we get cats that like me? So me and my wife.

• 3:56Speaker 04

  Oh, my God.

• 3:57Speaker 05

  We googled like friendliest cats. Because we never normally buy pedigrees or whatever. We were going, right, of course, of course. And then, yeah, it's these, it's ragdolls. And they are beautiful.

• 4:07Speaker 03

  Okay, that could be good.

• 4:09Speaker 04

  What's interesting is, we just chatted to Catherine Ryan, and she was trying to force her to have another kid. And now you are trying to force her to have a cat, which we've always been against, because classically Rosie says, why don't you like cats, Rosie? Do you remember? Don't smile.

• 4:22Speaker 05

  Can you remember?

• 4:22Speaker 03

  I don't remember why.

• 4:23Speaker 04

  Cats don't smile. That was our, that was our reason.

• 4:26Speaker 03

  They don't smile. Well, how do they show you that they're happy?

• 4:29Speaker 05

  Well, they purr.

• 4:30Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 4:30Speaker 05

  That's a famous one, isn't it?

• 4:32Speaker 06

  They put their.

• 4:34Speaker 03

  I don't know what to say.

• 4:36Speaker 04

  It was so hard for him to hide his contempt.

• 4:39Speaker 05

  I don't think I did try, to be fair, Chris.

• 4:42Speaker 03

  Okay, they purr, and that's fine. All right, okay.

• 4:45Speaker 06

  They roll around. Yeah, they roll around the back, they show you their belly, which is off. They do the little thing, that, that thing.

• 4:51Speaker 05

  They, yeah, they flop, and they sort of walk in, and they flump onto the floor in front of you.

• 4:55Speaker 03

  Right. I blame my mum for this, you know, because my mum used to throw things at cats who came in the garden when I was younger.

• 5:00Speaker 06

  There's the thing, you get some serious cat haters out there.

• 5:02Speaker 03

  This is, this, she hates cats, so I just, I also hate cats.

• 5:05Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 5:06Speaker 03

  But I don't think I do.

• 5:07Speaker 06

  No.

• 5:07Speaker 04

  No.

• 5:07Speaker 03

  Because I've never had one.

• 5:08Speaker 04

  A friendly cat, I'm all about. And I'll be honest with you, when I go to someone's house and I've got an unfriendly cat and it won't let us stroke it, I get very upset. I take it very personally.

• 5:16Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 5:17Speaker 04

  Yeah, and I do remember.

• 5:18Speaker 05

  You should.

• 5:19Speaker 04

  Well, when I was, um.

• 5:19Speaker 05

  It means you're a bad person.

• 5:21Speaker 04

  They can tell, they can get it out. I remember once, me and all my mates, what, I was, must have only been about 15, 16, me and all my mates were in my mate's house. And I think I've told you this, Rosie.

• 5:31Speaker 03

  You've told us most things.

• 5:32Speaker 04

  And we're playing on the, we're playing on the Xbox, right? And his cat walked in and just stood in the middle of the room in front of the telly, right? Looked directly at me, right? Lifted its back leg up and just started cleaning itself and kept full eye contact with me the whole time. And I remember I was like playing on the Xbox, I was going, Ben, what's your cat doing? Ben, I had, and it was just, and I was like, I don't know what it meant, but I didn't like it.

• 5:55Speaker 03

  No, I wouldn't read too much into that.

• 5:57Speaker 04

  No, that's.

• 5:58Speaker 03

  Coincidence.

• 5:59Speaker 04

  Maybe it was hinting. Yeah. You need to do some things about your personal hygiene. Should I take this as a compliment?

• 6:05Speaker 03

  One wrong one recognizes another.

• 6:10Speaker 03

  Thank you both so much for coming and chatting to us today. We started the programme that you are here to talk about.

• 6:17Speaker 04

  Tall Tales and Murder.

• 6:18Speaker 03

  Tall Tales and Murder. It's out now?

• 6:20Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 6:20Speaker 03

  Or did we get a link?

• 6:21Speaker 04

  No, no, no, you can binge it all on iPlayer if you want. It's on BBC One as well. We love it.

• 6:26Speaker 03

  Love it.

• 6:26Speaker 04

  Thanks, guys. And I'm not just saying that because you're sitting here now, like, we would say it was good, would say, it's great, yeah, it's good, you've got good reviews, would say all that stuff.

• 6:33Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 6:34Speaker 04

  But we were literally like.

• 6:35Speaker 03

  And we binged three.

• 6:36Speaker 04

  Next one, next one, next one.

• 6:37Speaker 05

  Oh, thanks, man.

• 6:38Speaker 04

  And now we are working together, we're working together today, but then Rosie's going away to do a job, and I'm going on tour, and we are fuming that we can't watch it until we're back together next week.

• 6:47Speaker 05

  Can you do like a watch party? Can you sort of fire it up at the same time from a separate hotel?

• 6:51Speaker 04

  You'd fall asleep.

• 6:53Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 6:53Speaker 04

  You would fall asleep. Or you'd do stuff and you'd annoy us. I have to be on you.

• 6:57Speaker 03

  And I like to look at my phone sometimes when I'm watching it, and I hate that I do that.

• 7:01Speaker 06

  You need a break.

• 7:02Speaker 03

  But I need, so if we were on FaceTime, I wouldn't be able to look on my phone.

• 7:05Speaker 04

  Actually, that's perfect, yeah, we should do that. We should FaceTime from separate rooms. Yeah.

• 7:09Speaker 03

  You hate me looking on my phone.

• 7:10Speaker 04

  I do, yeah.

• 7:11Speaker 03

  Genuinely really enjoying it.

• 7:13Speaker 04

  It felt, and I don't know if you'd take this as a compliment or as a, it feels a little bit Tarantino.

• 7:19Speaker 05

  Oh, yeah, well, we, that's one of the, was one of our references when we were.

• 7:23Speaker 04

  Right, ban.

• 7:24Speaker 05

  When we were doing it.

• 7:25Speaker 04

  I'm glad I did that.

• 7:25Speaker 05

  Because one of the things that he does, like, Pulp Fiction was our sort of specific thing that we liked. I mean, not that it's like Pulp Fiction or anything, but what's brilliant about Pulp Fiction is mad stuff happens that you're not expecting. There's a load of kind of interlocking stories in, in, in that film. But there are also big bits where it's just characters yabbering. You know, like when, when, when the assassins are kind of, are walking up to the student's door and stuff, and they're just discussing whether it, whether or not, yeah, yeah, yeah. And it goes, and it goes, well, that's once they're in the apartment, but the two of them just sort of standing out there, talking about whether or not a foot massage from another guy is okay. And it is, and it just goes on, there's no reason for it, there's no kind of plot purpose of it.

• 8:08Speaker 05

  But you're just really enjoying spending time with those characters. And we liked that idea that you could just, every so often, you could just be with people for a bit.

• 8:16Speaker 04

  Yeah, yeah.

• 8:16Speaker 03

  I love the two young actors as well.

• 8:19Speaker 04

  They're incredible.

• 8:19Speaker 03

  That is, is this his first job?

• 8:22Speaker 05

  It is his first job, isn't it? It's his first, the first, well, he's done little bits.

• 8:25Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 8:26Speaker 05

  In, in things here, here and there. But it was the first time that he's done a sort of proper big role. Like he's, I think he'd done a couple of tiny roles in like short films or whatever in Ireland. And, yeah, we were sort of looking for someone to play that part who, so Paul is like, he's, he's a wrong side of the tracks kind of kid. And Casey himself is from Rings End in, in Dublin. So he's lived, you know, a life among the people who Paul's from, right? And we had a lot of fantastic actors coming in, doing their best kind of wrong side of the tracks acting, nice, middle-class boys doing their best versions. And they were brilliant, but there was something missing. And then Stuart Carolyn, the writer, suggested Casey.

• 9:11Speaker 05

  And Casey's other world is he's a massive rap star. So he, under the name Casper Walsh, as part, one half of a, now is a solo artist, but previously is one half of Versatile, who used to like fill massive venues in Dublin. He, Stuart went, that guy, let's get, let's get him in. And we flew Ella over, who plays Bridget, and did a chemistry cast in between the two of them, and just went, that's it. And he sounds right. One of the things we get from, particularly from our Irish audiences, it's nice to hear somebody actually with that accent.

• 9:46Speaker 03

  Yep. We have put the subtitles on, and I think that is the biggest compliment to any programme.

• 9:51Speaker 04

  For the first episode.

• 9:52Speaker 03

  No, because you, because you, it's real, it's real. It's real, and you kind of go, oh, these accents are so broad. And I, I think it's delicious. I love hearing really thick accents. And so, yeah, so, but we put the subtitles on, which is great, because I watch everything with subtitles.

• 10:09Speaker 04

  Second episode, you don't need it because you're climatized, don't you? You've got it, you know it then.

• 10:12Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 10:12Speaker 04

  I think, I've never been anywhere.

• 10:13Speaker 05

  We're also eating at the time.

• 10:15Speaker 03

  Well, that's what, because I thought, is it because we're eating and we can't concentrate?

• 10:18Speaker 04

  Room service.

• 10:19Speaker 05

  You're eating very loud.

• 10:20Speaker 03

  Maybe loud, but no, I watch everything with it.

• 10:23Speaker 05

  If you ate with your mouse shot, you'd be able to turn the subtitles off.

• 10:25Speaker 04

  And also, I was enjoying it, so I was purring quite loudly as well.

• 10:30Speaker 05

  I've never been anywhere more obsessed with accent than Ireland. Oh, yeah. Yeah, but like everybody about the specificity of accents, do you know what I mean? Like.

• 10:38Speaker 06

  It's such a small place.

• 10:39Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 10:40Speaker 06

  It's because of, well, it's my mother's theory is that because of certain mountain ranges. It's small island, but like the diversity in accent is huge.

• 10:48Speaker 03

  Where else are you from?

• 10:49Speaker 06

  So I grew up in Mayo, which is on the west coast.

• 10:53Speaker 03

  Right.

• 10:54Speaker 06

  And both of my parents are Dubs, which is the east coast.

• 10:56Speaker 03

  Uh huh.

• 10:56Speaker 06

  And then I lived in the east coast for 12 plus years.

• 10:59Speaker 03

  Right.

• 10:59Speaker 06

  So, uh, that's me.

• 11:04Speaker 05

  So interesting.

• 11:05Speaker 03

  I'm learning, I'm working with a guy at the minute on another job from Belfast.

• 11:08Speaker 06

  Oh, yeah.

• 11:09Speaker 03

  So it's just like the difference in the accents. It's just really interesting.

• 11:12Speaker 06

  Yeah, for such a small place.

• 11:13Speaker 03

  We're the same where we live. Um, we live in South Shields, we're sand dancers. And then you've got Sunderland, which are Mackems, Newcastle, which are Geordies. And it's literally they're 20 minutes.

• 11:24Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 11:24Speaker 03

  From each other.

• 11:25Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 11:25Speaker 03

  Like you could, you drop, and the accents are completely different.

• 11:27Speaker 04

  Yeah, sometimes people will call our accent Geordie accent on Instagram or something.

• 11:31Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 11:31Speaker 04

  And you get an actual Geordie going, the sand dancers. They're from Shields, it's not a Geordie accent, because there is subtle differences.

• 11:37Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 11:37Speaker 04

  But I mean, you've gigged back in the day, you had a gig in Dublin and stuff.

• 11:40Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 11:40Speaker 04

  I did Vicar Street recently on my tour and I looked, I said it on stage, I looked on the, well, I was checking, me and my mate were going out drinking the next day and I was checking the weather. And it tells you the, obviously rain.

• 11:51Speaker 03

  Guaranteed.

• 11:52Speaker 04

  Hundred percent rain. Um, but it tells you the number of the bit that you're in.

• 11:56Speaker 05

  What?

• 11:57Speaker 04

  Of Dublin.

• 11:57Speaker 03

  Of Dublin, oh, yeah.

• 11:59Speaker 04

  Like the fucking Hunger Games.

• 12:00Speaker 05

  You're in Dublin.

• 12:01Speaker 04

  Yeah, yeah, it's like, yeah.

• 12:02Speaker 03

  Oh, what do you mean?

• 12:03Speaker 04

  It's like Hunger, I said to them, I said, why have you got numbered districts like the Hunger Games? And they were loving it.

• 12:07Speaker 03

  Oh, it's a very broad postcode.

• 12:10Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 12:10Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 12:11Speaker 04

  Really, yeah, really, really bizarre.

• 12:13Speaker 03

  I've never been.

• 12:14Speaker 06

  Have you not?

• 12:15Speaker 03

  I know, and I'm so embarrassed.

• 12:16Speaker 04

  It's so lovely. It's a great, great city.

• 12:19Speaker 03

  I know, I'm really, I really need to go.

• 12:21Speaker 04

  And you filmed there for how long?

• 12:22Speaker 05

  Uh, for, I think most of my life, it seems like.

• 12:27Speaker 05

  I might be exaggerating, but.

• 12:28Speaker 04

  Straight to London.

• 12:29Speaker 05

  Straight to the thick of it, straight to Dublin. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Uh, uh, uh, we did like three months shooting there and then, you know, and then whilst this one's going out, I'm prepping the next one. So I'm.

• 12:40Speaker 04

  Fantastic.

• 12:41Speaker 05

  So as of about two weeks from now, I've got a flat in Dublin again.

• 12:44Speaker 03

  Oh, nice.

• 12:45Speaker 05

  Live there.

• 12:45Speaker 04

  Brilliant. So series two's happening?

• 12:47Speaker 05

  Series two's happening, yeah.

• 12:49Speaker 04

  Fantastic. It was so odd at the beginning to see you, not giving away anything for anyone, it's one of the first scenes, to see you threatening someone with a baseball bat. And I know you're an attner. And I know you're an attner.

• 13:02Speaker 03

  What's she doing?

• 13:03Speaker 04

  Yeah, that is the point in acting.

• 13:04Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 13:05Speaker 04

  But I was like, wow, okay. Extremely jarring.

• 13:08Speaker 06

  That's exactly why I wanted the part.

• 13:10Speaker 04

  Brilliant.

• 13:10Speaker 06

  Cause like, it was one of the first scripts I'd read in a long time. We're like, I want that job. I really want that job. And, um, because she is so different.

• 13:17Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 13:18Speaker 06

  And, uh, Dublin has a huge place in my heart. I spent my twenties there. I might have spent my childhood in Mayo, but I really grew up in Dublin. And, um, I love Dublin so much. And to be in a show that's based in Dublin, play a Dubliner, I was just like, please.

• 13:36Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 13:36Speaker 05

  Play the queen of Dublin, no less.

• 13:38Speaker 06

  Oh, yeah, I'll take that.

• 13:41Speaker 06

  No, but I get so much fun, like to be someone so different and the, like the costumes, the hair.

• 13:47Speaker 05

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 13:48Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 13:48Speaker 06

  It was such a departure. I was just, I love it.

• 13:50Speaker 05

  I don't think there was, I mean, the costumes are quite mad for most people in that show, but I don't think there was anyone who enjoyed the whole being put in a costume more than you did.

• 13:58Speaker 06

  Yeah, loved it.

• 13:58Speaker 05

  That whole process.

• 13:59Speaker 06

  It was very intrinsic. I mean, we did like a mini rehearsal one afternoon.

• 14:03Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 14:03Speaker 06

  Uh, and the hair lady took my ponytail to mind it.

• 14:07Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 14:08Speaker 06

  And I was like, I feel exposed. I can't be her without that thing at the back of my head going like that. Cause yeah, it's, it was all.

• 14:17Speaker 05

  Red tips.

• 14:17Speaker 06

  Yeah, it was so helpful for becoming the person. So, yeah.

• 14:24Speaker 04

  This episode is sponsored by TV Licensing. A TV licence covers you to watch over 400 TV channels and everything on BBC iPlayer. To find out more, go to tvl.co.uk/pod. Rosie, what's that you're holding there?

• 14:38Speaker 03

  Well, as a House of Game alumni.

• 14:40Speaker 04

  Yes, also me, alumni.

• 14:42Speaker 03

  Alumni, um, but as the only winner in the room.

• 14:45Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 14:45Speaker 03

  Uh, this is the trophy that I won on House of Games and that's what we are talking about this week.

• 14:50Speaker 04

  So one of the, uh, one of the shows that we're going to talk about this week, uh, House of Games. Now, House of Games, uh, obviously a phenomenal format, a phenomenal show. Um, Richard Osman, uh, hosted it for a long, long time when I did it, when you did, and now he stepped down from hosting duties and Michael Sheen has stepped up.

• 15:04Speaker 03

  Yeah. Great show. One of the only quiz shows I've ever done and won it.

• 15:10Speaker 03

  Crazy, absolutely crazy. Um, I, I love doing it. It's genuinely, uh, really interesting. It's not like any of the other games.

• 15:18Speaker 04

  Yeah, it's, it's very clever, the questions. It's not just, it's like, it's like applying the knowledge. You'll know if you watch it, it is a phenomenal show.

• 15:25Speaker 03

  How did I win?

• 15:26Speaker 04

  I mean, I don't, I genuinely want to recount, but you know.

• 15:29Speaker 03

  I think there was a lot of, um, music questions and I'm quite good with music.

• 15:32Speaker 04

  Do you know what? I'm seeing it now. I might go back on. I might go back on to try and win as well. But guys, if you watch, I'll go back on just to get a trophy.

• 15:40Speaker 03

  Is that how, yeah, it's how pathetic you are, but anyway, it lives in the studio, private place.

• 15:44Speaker 04

  Go back on, but I will be watching.

• 15:45Speaker 03

  What time is it on?

• 15:46Speaker 04

  The new series started Monday, the 5th of October. Um, and how many episodes do you think there's going to be?

• 15:52Speaker 03

  Oh, my God, what? I don't know.

• 15:53Speaker 04

  A hundred. Plenty to watch there.

• 15:56Speaker 03

  Great.

• 15:56Speaker 04

  Absolute powerhouse and it's on BBC Two.

• 15:59Speaker 03

  Oh, do you know what that signals?

• 16:03Speaker 04

  Was that your I'm a celeb?

• 16:04Speaker 03

  That's I'm a celebrity is back.

• 16:05Speaker 04

  Right, great, yes.

• 16:06Speaker 03

  You know it's autumn. You know winter's coming.

• 16:09Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 16:10Speaker 03

  What did you say about the jungle just before?

• 16:11Speaker 04

  What the funny thing about the jungle is, uh, it's obviously a pro institution. It's a, it's some, you know, cold weather viewing over here. It's the only thing I can watch in the winter where people are in a hot climate and I'm not jealous because they have to do horrible stuff.

• 16:24Speaker 03

  So true.

• 16:25Speaker 04

  I'm like, yes, you've got the sunshine, but I don't want to be there because you're not playing golf. You are eating kangaroo testicle and having a genuinely horrible time. And it's on ITV, obviously Ant and Dec hosting.

• 16:34Speaker 03

  I'll be watching. Love it.

• 16:36Speaker 04

  And big, like huge news for me, um, as a massive fan of nature shows and David Attenborough. Blue Planet, series three. It's a six part series, obviously David Attenborough voicing it. Um, just phenomenal. Again, great to sit with the kids and watch and learn. Obviously the, the things they film so like on, you know, the things that they capture. And what's amazing about being Blue Planet, obviously it's all about the sea. We know more about the surface of the moon than we do about the oceans around.

• 17:04Speaker 03

  That always fascinated me that way.

• 17:06Speaker 04

  Cause it's so big. They're so big and so deep and there's so much going on. And a lot of the time, like Blue Planet, series two, it was obviously all, you know, obviously we're impacting the planet a lot as humans, you know, we're, we're destroying a lot of ecosystems. This is, it focuses a lot on the resilience and how the animals and ecosystems are adapting in a changing world. So there's a lot more, there's a thread of hope.

• 17:29Speaker 03

  So comforting little hug.

• 17:31Speaker 04

  Yeah, uh, yeah, from, you know, the legend, Sir David Attenborough.

• 17:34Speaker 03

  I'm happy with that. The kids, the kids love watching it. So it's another thing to watch with the children that we need.

• 17:39Speaker 04

  Yeah, it's guilt free, it's guilt free family viewing. It's actually, it's more than guilt free. It's.

• 17:43Speaker 03

  I love it.

• 17:44Speaker 04

  It's, yeah, you're buzzing because they're learning something and it's, you know, it's again, it's a British institution. A TV licence covers you to watch over 400 TV channels and everything on BBC iPlayer. To find out more, go to tvl.co.uk/pod.

• 17:58Speaker 03

  Babadu babadu babadu ba.

• 18:00Speaker 00

  Your sausage McMuffin with egg didn't change, your receipt did. The sausage McMuffin with egg extra volume meal includes a hash brown and a small coffee for just $5. Only at McDonald's for a limited time.

• 18:12Speaker 01

  Price and participation may vary. Promotion pricing may be lower than meal pricing.

• 18:15Speaker 02

  This episode is brought to you by Universal Pictures' Focker-in-law. Spin this Thanksgiving with the Fockers. The beloved Meet the Parents franchise returns with a twist. Robert De Niro and Ben Stiller are back, joined by Ariana Grande as the newest member of the family. Get ready for laughs, unexpected surprises and a hilarious new chapter of the family saga. Focker-in-law, rated PG 13, only in theatres this Thanksgiving. Get tickets now.

• 18:43Speaker 05

  Philippa's audition is one of the best things I've ever seen in my life because it was just so, it was, it was so completely, when people audition in, in lots of different ways, right? Some people just sit there and they sort of say the lines at the camera that you've put there. And, uh, and other people kind of, can I stand up a bit? And Philippa was like, can I stand up a bit? And we went, yeah. And then she, and then two minutes later, she was standing up a bit, miming smashing people to death with baseball bats. So I'm like, this is a really physical audition. It was like you properly threw yourself into it. It was fantastic.

• 19:13Speaker 06

  But the baseball bat was a draw. I was like.

• 19:15Speaker 05

  Yeah, yes, yeah.

• 19:16Speaker 06

  How many times you get the chance?

• 19:18Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 19:18Speaker 06

  To wield one of them yugs, you know?

• 19:21Speaker 05

  But you weren't dressed as Mal Baker, you just flown in as Philippa. You're in a room, you're in a room in Ranala, just miming smashing people over.

• 19:28Speaker 03

  Hey, listen, got the part.

• 19:29Speaker 06

  I did, and I had to wait a full week to find out because I was like, well, I know this is, this is what happens. Sometimes you hear nothing. Sometimes it can be weeks. Sometimes it can be the next day.

• 19:37Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 19:38Speaker 06

  But it was a week and it got to Friday and I was like, I don't get that.

• 19:41Speaker 03

  Oh, no.

• 19:42Speaker 06

  You know, I was like, oh, I would have loved, I would have loved that job. And then I was five o'clock on Friday evening and I was like. Oh my god.

• 19:50Speaker 04

  Five o'clock on Friday.

• 19:51Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 19:52Speaker 05

  That's like.

• 19:53Speaker 04

  Because that is straight to the fridge for the wine.

• 19:55Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 19:55Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 19:56Speaker 03

  Oh, hundred percent. Told you I haven't to wait all week, but then that is a nice time to find out.

• 20:00Speaker 04

  I don't know how you do it.

• 20:00Speaker 06

  Oh, it's a great time to find out.

• 20:01Speaker 04

  I don't know how you do it.

• 20:02Speaker 06

  But that's still just part of the job. You like, sometimes you'll hear nothing and then.

• 20:05Speaker 03

  Yeah, sometimes you just hear, you just don't hear anything at all.

• 20:07Speaker 04

  Mostly you don't hear anything. If you've not got it, no one gets back to you.

• 20:11Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 20:11Speaker 04

  It took, it took three months for me to hear that I got the part in the thick of it after I'd done the audition. So imagine how many people.

• 20:18Speaker 03

  Three months?

• 20:19Speaker 04

  No before they got to me.

• 20:20Speaker 03

  Oh, I feel like they might give it to someone else.

• 20:24Speaker 04

  It's exactly what you think. They must have gone through a lot of people.

• 20:27Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 20:27Speaker 04

  But it was a full, I think they shot it and they did a full Back to the Future with what's his name, where they had to change it and then get thing in.

• 20:33Speaker 05

  Forgot about that.

• 20:34Speaker 04

  You don't know that. Who was that?

• 20:35Speaker 03

  The whole of that person.

• 20:36Speaker 05

  He plays.

• 20:37Speaker 06

  Oh, Eric Stoltz.

• 20:38Speaker 04

  Eric Stoltz.

• 20:38Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 20:39Speaker 04

  Eric Stoltz plays a drug dealer in Pulp Fiction. Yeah, they, they did, they did nearly the entire film with him and then went, actually no.

• 20:44Speaker 03

  That's got to do something to your self-esteem, doesn't it?

• 20:47Speaker 05

  Yeah, particularly when the show then goes on to become one of the great films.

• 20:51Speaker 04

  Yeah, it's a culturally, yeah, properly culturally significant thing.

• 20:54Speaker 05

  Unbelievable.

• 20:54Speaker 03

  That's, that, that's a lot of therapy sessions of, you are good enough, you just weren't right for this.

• 20:59Speaker 05

  That's the thing that I find, like, I, I don't know how actors, I don't know how you do it. It's like, yeah, with comedy, with stand-up, I'm putting myself out there and I'm going on stage and you know, you know, Chris, you know what it's like when a joke doesn't land. It's the worst feeling ever. But have someone else who you're like going in and going, I think I did well there. I really want that to go up. Actually, not even to call you back. No, but you know, you know what, I, I, I used to feel exactly like that and I, I, you know, I still do a bit, but, but being on the other side of that table, casting people has taught me something which is, oh, it's, it isn't personal. You aren't right for the part. Like they've got a thing in their heads. Do you know what I mean? Like you could go in and give an amazing performance, like all of those people who came and, and auditioned for Paul, who were just fantastic. And then you see Casey and go, no, that's it.

• 21:45Speaker 04

  Right.

• 21:45Speaker 06

  That's what's rough. That's a big thing about being an actor. You have to separate yourself from the rejection. Just go, it's not me.

• 21:52Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 21:52Speaker 06

  It's, that's for somebody else. And the thing that's meant for me is somewhere else, but it's, I just, yeah, if you, you can't keep taking it personally. You have to develop a really thick skin, but so much of the job is rejection. Like so much of being a stand-up is potential humiliation. Yeah. It's just you make peace with that part of the job.

• 22:11Speaker 03

  Uh huh. Yeah.

• 22:12Speaker 05

  I think that's true because, because like with stand-up, humiliation is baked into the process, right? Isn't it? Because in order to make a stand-up show, you, you can only go out and, and try it. You can't rehearse it in your bedroom and then put it in front of people. It's not like playing an instrument. You, I'm ready now. I can, I can be in front of people. You, you have to find out from people whether the idea that you think is funny is actually funny or not. And the only way to do it is put yourself out there and have people go, you're an idiot.

• 22:37Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 22:37Speaker 05

  Like, that's it.

• 22:39Speaker 06

  It's not working.

• 22:40Speaker 05

  And, and, and when you put your tour that you're on to bed, you, you, there's a bit of you goes, oh god, I've got to do that again now. The next time I go out here, I'm going to have to go and do the working progress shows where they go, I saw that Chris runs in. I've got to be honest with you.

• 22:52Speaker 04

  I'm already hitting myself.

• 22:54Speaker 03

  It's a whole.

• 22:55Speaker 05

  But you do. I, I used to shit myself from the minute I knew that the show was working.

• 22:59Speaker 04

  Mm-hmm.

• 23:00Speaker 05

  I'd go, I'd have five minutes of, yeah, five, and then I go, oh god, it, it'll begin again.

• 23:06Speaker 04

  Yeah, you've got to do another one every time.

• 23:08Speaker 03

  No, have a year off, please. You can't, it's.

• 23:10Speaker 04

  Yeah, but in that year, I'll be writing the new one.

• 23:12Speaker 03

  Oh god.

• 23:13Speaker 04

  Yeah, yeah. Listen, this isn't about me. It's about you. You're right. Can you remember the first time we met?

• 23:18Speaker 05

  Uh, wasn't it on that ridiculous, was it on, um, oh god, Show and Tell?

• 23:25Speaker 04

  No, we met before that. We met at the Approach in Nottingham for just the tonic.

• 23:30Speaker 05

  Oh, yeah.

• 23:31Speaker 04

  I was comparing, you were headlining.

• 23:32Speaker 05

  Oh, yeah.

• 23:33Speaker 04

  And the thick of it was out and me and my support actor, me mate, friend of the podcast, Carl Hudson, and he remember, he reminded me this the other day. He said, me, him and you were standing chatting and someone came up and went, oh my god, I love the thick of it. And they shook their hands with you and you turned to me and him and you went, that literally never happens. He went, that never, oh my, that's so weird. That never happens.

• 23:54Speaker 05

  Yes.

• 23:54Speaker 04

  Do you remember thinking, because me and him were a bit like, oh my god, because we love the thick of it. So we were a little bit sort of starstruck by it. And for you to go, that never happens. We were like, really?

• 24:03Speaker 05

  Yeah, but it didn't.

• 24:03Speaker 04

  That never fucking happens.

• 24:04Speaker 03

  You were in it for years. I was like, I didn't realise you were in it for that long.

• 24:07Speaker 04

  Whole time.

• 24:07Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 24:08Speaker 05

  Well, it was, the show went on for like seven years, but there's only 22 episodes.

• 24:12Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 24:12Speaker 05

  There's like not much of it.

• 24:14Speaker 03

  It doesn't seem like a seven year stretch. That's why I was quite shocked.

• 24:17Speaker 05

  No, well, we did it like, we sort of did it every so often. And there's a film in the middle of that as well. There's the spin-off movie in the loop.

• 24:22Speaker 04

  In the loop.

• 24:22Speaker 05

  And it, and, and yeah, so it sort of goes on for a while, but yes, only sort of every so often. There's a weird one, the thick of it.

• 24:30Speaker 03

  Chris, Chris is obsessed. He made me watch it. I, I thoroughly enjoyed it. I'm not saying that, but.

• 24:34Speaker 04

  You have to watch this. If you're going to be in comedy, you have to watch this.

• 24:35Speaker 03

  I think it was one of the kind of like, if we're going to last one, like programme, wasn't it? It's like, if you don't like this, then we're not going to.

• 24:42Speaker 05

  We've got problems.

• 24:43Speaker 03

  Do you know what?

• 24:44Speaker 05

  Yeah, I do, yeah.

• 24:44Speaker 03

  Which I think is a real thing.

• 24:46Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 24:46Speaker 04

  I think Tall Tales of the Mirror will be that of this generation. There'll be people doing it now going, if you don't like this, we are done.

• 24:52Speaker 03

  We're not going to get on.

• 24:53Speaker 05

  That's it. It has got, it has got cult written all over it, Tall Tales of the Mirror.

• 24:57Speaker 04

  Hundred percent.

• 24:57Speaker 05

  Because I, I remember saying to Caroline, our fantastic producer, uh, this is like, get five stars or one star. And I'm kind of all right with either of those because like it's a swing, isn't it? It's a, it's a bit of a, bit of a swing.

• 25:09Speaker 03

  You're right, actually, yeah.

• 25:10Speaker 04

  But I love, there's a little bit of dark. Again, I don't want to give anything away for no one, but there's the bit where, there's the bit where Bunny's trying to get the mirror into sleep. Let's just see.

• 25:20Speaker 05

  Oh, yeah, yeah.

• 25:21Speaker 04

  And he's doing something and then I knew, I knew it. I was like, he's going to be standing there. I was like, I know, I know he's going to stand there. But it was just, yeah, how long have you been standing there? He just goes, a bit. And it was just the way it was so undersold, the line. Was that a me, was that line or was that fuck about with a bit or was?

• 25:37Speaker 05

  No, no, that was, that's all in there.

• 25:38Speaker 04

  A bit was great.

• 25:40Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 25:40Speaker 04

  What I like about it.

• 25:42Speaker 05

  He's just sort of, he's always got a little twinkle of mischief underneath him. Made in Gillen. And so, so the, yeah, so he just has to say it straight and you just go, oh.

• 25:51Speaker 04

  A bit.

• 25:52Speaker 05

  Oh god, it was delivered beautifully.

• 25:54Speaker 03

  Well, I think we should watch it. I think we should. I genuinely want to watch the next one, so let's not wait.

• 25:58Speaker 04

  Let's not wait. Let's watch it separately.

• 26:00Speaker 03

  We haven't even finished Traitors. We still, we watched two episodes of Traitors.

• 26:02Speaker 05

  Wait, wait, wait. You haven't finished Traitors?

• 26:04Speaker 03

  No.

• 26:04Speaker 05

  But you presumably at this point now, you, it's not like you've gone through the last week avoiding.

• 26:09Speaker 03

  Oh, I know exactly who's won. I know exactly what's going on. Would you guys do it? Would you do it?

• 26:13Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 26:14Speaker 03

  Would you?

• 26:15Speaker 04

  Yeah, of course.

• 26:16Speaker 06

  I've never seen a single episode, so I don't want to commit.

• 26:19Speaker 04

  Not even Irish Traitors.

• 26:21Speaker 06

  Not even, no, I'm a very bad TV watcher. I just, I really don't watch a lot of TV, which is really bad.

• 26:26Speaker 03

  No, it's not bad. It's probably very, do you read books?

• 26:29Speaker 06

  I don't even read books. No.

• 26:30Speaker 03

  What do you do?

• 26:30Speaker 04

  Stare at a wall.

• 26:33Speaker 03

  What do you do when you're done?

• 26:34Speaker 04

  Do you play ball in a cup?

• 26:35Speaker 06

  I listen to.

• 26:36Speaker 03

  What?

• 26:39Speaker 04

  It's on a string.

• 26:40Speaker 06

  Yes.

• 26:41Speaker 04

  I just thought of like something that someone would do.

• 26:43Speaker 06

  Very Victorian, yeah.

• 26:46Speaker 03

  What do you do?

• 26:47Speaker 05

  Alec Guinness in, uh, it's in prison, just sort of throwing a ball against the wall.

• 26:52Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 26:53Speaker 06

  Yeah, I make paper animals. No, I don't. I, um, I listen to podcasts a lot. Yeah.

• 26:59Speaker 03

  We're a big fan of that, so that's absolutely fine.

• 27:00Speaker 06

  And I always seem to be just moving around the house, tidying up or something.

• 27:04Speaker 03

  What do you like? What kind of podcasts do you like?

• 27:06Speaker 06

  Anything to do with ghosty stuff or paranormal stuff.

• 27:08Speaker 03

  Brilliant. Yeah.

• 27:09Speaker 04

  Yeah, we go.

• 27:10Speaker 06

  Like all that stuff.

• 27:11Speaker 03

  True crime or you're more sort of the ghostly side?

• 27:14Speaker 06

  True crime in the past, very much so, but then I got to a limit and was like, I actually don't want to listen to any of this anymore. It's very, very dark.

• 27:20Speaker 04

  Oh, Rosie checks under the bed before she goes to bed. She needs to stop listening to them. She doesn't want to go.

• 27:23Speaker 03

  I locked my bedroom door and then I put like this big vase in front of the bedroom door.

• 27:29Speaker 04

  A vase?

• 27:29Speaker 03

  Like it's like a big sort of stool, like vase. So I think if someone comes in and they, they knock the door, I'll hear them coming in. Because we stupidly did the Michael McIntyre Midnight Game Show where he comes to your house. And we, and I was wide awake because it was Chris who was surprising. Chris fully slept through 12 people, 12 grown men and women coming into our house, fully slept.

• 27:51Speaker 06

  You sleep that well. I'm so jealous.

• 27:52Speaker 04

  I still stand by, I still stand by that if I woke up and the work was all good, I could have fought them all one by one.

• 27:57Speaker 03

  No, they were, they were in the bedroom. They were all by your face.

• 28:00Speaker 06

  Have you seen them do this?

• 28:01Speaker 04

  No, no.

• 28:02Speaker 06

  Oh my, I can't imagine anything more, well, infuriating. I would, I'd start swinging straight away. I'd be like, ah, you know, how does anyone?

• 28:10Speaker 04

  I'm not signing your fucking way.

• 28:14Speaker 06

  But how people wake up and they just go, ah, oh.

• 28:17Speaker 04

  I had, I, I talked about it in my show. I had no idea, like, and the worst bit is you, you're asleep and you get full Michael. He is, he is, you know, arms swinging. He is full jazz. I see him in my show. I've got a laugh. He's like a jazz hands burglar. He's just in the house and he's fully ready. He's in Michael McIntyre mode and you have just woke up. It is horrendous. But you, I went under the covers. I got afraid. I went under the covers and I felt immediately sick. And then you go, I've got to switch this on. I've just got to switch it on. And you just, that's what it is. It's just the show must go on.

• 28:51Speaker 03

  Well, very nearly passed us by because the, my agent got in touch and said, do you think Chris will be up for this? And I went, no. I went, he would hate, he's not, you're not a pranks kind of guy. And I, and I was like, he would hate it. Absolutely not. And then dinner that night, I, I said to you, I was like, oh, Lee rang and said about Michael McIntyre. And you went, oh, actually, no, I think that would be, I'd be, I'd, that would be quite fun. So then.

• 29:14Speaker 04

  What a shame that would have been for.

• 29:16Speaker 03

  Yeah, because I went, well, it's gone now. I was like, whatever. So then I got back in touch with my agent and said, I think actually, we talked about it and he would be up for it, but I've told him that it's, that it's not happening.

• 29:26Speaker 04

  So that may have helped.

• 29:27Speaker 05

  Right.

• 29:27Speaker 04

  Because I do remember being under the covers. I go on, she fucking booked this.

• 29:34Speaker 03

  Oh, it was horrible. It was horrible because we, the kids stayed out, so we got drunk. And, but I couldn't say, right, don't drink anymore, Chris, because people are coming to the house.

• 29:43Speaker 04

  Two bottles of red.

• 29:43Speaker 03

  Two bottles of red.

• 29:44Speaker 05

  Two bottles of red while you're on BBC One prime time.

• 29:47Speaker 03

  Fully naked in bed. Never sleeps naked.

• 29:49Speaker 06

  That's the thing with, yeah, what are you wearing?

• 29:51Speaker 03

  But then, but you never sleep naked.

• 29:53Speaker 04

  Don't know why I did it.

• 29:54Speaker 03

  And I, but I couldn't say it.

• 29:56Speaker 05

  You couldn't get your jarmas on, that's why. I was like, fuck this. I'm just going to bed.

• 30:01Speaker 03

  It was so, it was so, it was actually really stressful. I, I didn't enjoy it in the end.

• 30:05Speaker 04

  It sounds horrific. Now, your house is tax deductible.

• 30:10Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 30:10Speaker 04

  So, you know, imagine, imagine that.

• 30:13Speaker 05

  No, I am not an accountant.

• 30:16Speaker 06

  Don't take his advice.

• 30:20Speaker 07

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• 31:01Speaker 07

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• 31:45Speaker 00

  Your sausage McMuffin with egg didn't change. Your receipt did. The sausage McMuffin with egg extra value meal includes a hash brown and a small coffee for just $5. Only at McDonald's for a limited time.

• 31:57Speaker 01

  Price and participation may vary. Promotion pricing may be lower than meal pricing.

• 32:00Speaker 02

  This episode is brought to you by Universal Pictures Focker in Law. Spin this Thanksgiving with the Fockers. The beloved Meet the Parents franchise returns with a twist. Robert De Niro and Ben Stiller are back, joined by Ariana Grande as the newest member of the family. Get ready for laughs, unexpected surprises, and a hilarious new chapter of the family saga. Focker in Law, rated PG 13, only in theaters this Thanksgiving. Get tickets now.

• 32:28Speaker 04

  Now, you like the ghosty podcast and things, but I've just read my notes and you are scared of statues.

• 32:35Speaker 06

  Yes, I am. Yeah. I learned the word for it the other day. Automatonophobia.

• 32:39Speaker 04

  Okay.

• 32:40Speaker 06

  So it's, yeah.

• 32:41Speaker 03

  Really?

• 32:42Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah.

• 32:43Speaker 04

  In, in what degree are you scared? Can you walk past a statue?

• 32:47Speaker 06

  I need to be beside someone as a buffer.

• 32:49Speaker 04

  No.

• 32:50Speaker 05

  How do you get around London?

• 32:51Speaker 06

  Well, they're all over there and they're standing on things. It's if you're in a room in an enclosed space like a church.

• 32:56Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 32:56Speaker 06

  Museum.

• 32:57Speaker 04

  I'm with you.

• 32:58Speaker 06

  You know, people who decide to have statues or sculptures in their house.

• 33:02Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 33:02Speaker 06

  Don't get that.

• 33:03Speaker 03

  Are you Catholic?

• 33:04Speaker 06

  Yes. Lapsed, big style.

• 33:07Speaker 03

  Me too.

• 33:07Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 33:08Speaker 03

  I used to serve on the altar and everything. And I'm just rubbish now.

• 33:10Speaker 06

  Yeah. And I remember I used to do, I used to serve mass altar girl.

• 33:16Speaker 03

  Me too.

• 33:16Speaker 06

  And they, they incorporated a Jesus in the corner at some stage.

• 33:20Speaker 03

  He wasn't always there.

• 33:21Speaker 05

  To be fair, he's owned his place.

• 33:23Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 33:23Speaker 03

  It's his house. It's his house.

• 33:25Speaker 06

  I remember having to sit there. Kind of, I was kind of like, oh, get me away, get me away from that thing.

• 33:29Speaker 03

  So it's been from the in young?

• 33:31Speaker 06

  Yeah. My parents, I remember kind of how it started. We were in France on our holidays and we were driving past.

• 33:37Speaker 04

  A statue killed my dad.

• 33:40Speaker 06

  And now I hate them. We went into a statue, into a church really late at night and there was just real medieval statues all over the place. It just terrified the shit.

• 33:48Speaker 04

  Wow.

• 33:49Speaker 06

  Yeah. Cause they were painted. So there's various degrees, like the bigger they are, the more scary, the more painted they are, the more scary. If they're wearing clothes, terrifying.

• 33:58Speaker 04

  If they're wearing clothes.

• 33:59Speaker 06

  Sometimes you get statues that are wearing clothes, like they might have a blanket on or something and they're terrifying. And then waxworks, mannequins.

• 34:07Speaker 03

  Madame Tussauds, absolutely not.

• 34:09Speaker 04

  Well, Madame Tussauds upset you massively.

• 34:11Speaker 06

  If, yeah. Well, it's fine because there's a lot of people around, but if I was in there on my own at night.

• 34:15Speaker 05

  Many of them are made of wax though, aren't they, those people?

• 34:17Speaker 04

  Wow.

• 34:17Speaker 06

  Yes.

• 34:19Speaker 05

  They're all people. They just look like people.

• 34:21Speaker 06

  People. That's the problem is because they look like people. They're the size of people. They're wearing clothes, but they don't move. That's the thing.

• 34:28Speaker 05

  I remember years ago, there was like, there was a Star Wars exhibition in Edinburgh one year, like props and stuff. And, and I went in really late in the day. So it's like everyone else was coming out and there were just only a couple of people still in there. I had to kind of race through it. And at the very top, there was a room that you went in that was all red. And it was, it had that flooring that they have in the bit in Empire Strikes Back where Han Solo's encased in carbonite.

• 34:53Speaker 04

  Right.

• 34:54Speaker 05

  And they had a big Darth Vader there. And there was steam coming out of the floors and they were just playing in the sound of him breathing.

• 35:01Speaker 04

  Oh my god.

• 35:02Speaker 05

  And I was standing there and it was only me in that room and this thing. And I went, I have to leave.

• 35:07Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 35:07Speaker 04

  Wow.

• 35:08Speaker 05

  It was genuinely, uh, uh, this is, he's gonna fucking do me.

• 35:12Speaker 03

  It's so nervy. It's very.

• 35:15Speaker 05

  You know, like you, it's really unnerving because they're just, they look, you're humans. You're programmed to kind of respond to them as humans.

• 35:20Speaker 06

  Yeah. Why aren't you moving?

• 35:21Speaker 05

  Why aren't you moving?

• 35:22Speaker 06

  And when are you going to? You're going to catch me by surprise at some stage and you're just gonna get me.

• 35:26Speaker 04

  Yeah, no, I get it. So here's a one then. So would you rather be in a room, so in this room now with, so what do you say? If it's perfectly in proportion, if it's wearing clothes, if it's painted, that's the worst.

• 35:38Speaker 06

  Terrible. Yeah.

• 35:39Speaker 04

  Would you rather be in the room with a statue that is exactly like that and it is a statue?

• 35:45Speaker 06

  Hmm.

• 35:45Speaker 04

  Or a Covent Garden performer who's staying still?

• 35:49Speaker 03

  Oh no. Oh god, I'm on them, on them stilts.

• 35:52Speaker 06

  The Covent Garden performer is totally fine because I know that they're a human.

• 35:55Speaker 03

  Cause you know it's a person.

• 35:56Speaker 06

  And I know it's a person and they're alive.

• 35:59Speaker 04

  Okay. Third option.

• 36:00Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 36:00Speaker 04

  You come in the room and I say, there's a thing in the corner. It's either a statue or a Covent Garden performer. Is that the worst outcome? Or is it worse if it's definitely 100% a statue?

• 36:13Speaker 06

  Oh, definitely 100% a statue. Yeah.

• 36:14Speaker 04

  Wow, that's interesting.

• 36:15Speaker 03

  It's got a name.

• 36:16Speaker 04

  Yeah, no, that's, wow.

• 36:17Speaker 06

  Cause I don't understand it myself. They just, I just hate them.

• 36:20Speaker 04

  I remember.

• 36:21Speaker 06

  Um, you know, the screaming angels from Doctor Who.

• 36:24Speaker 04

  Yeah. I was like, oh, to say that. I bet you that's terrible for you. I bet you that's, do you know them, Rosie? It's where, when you're looking at them, they can't move. But when you look away and you, they're closer.

• 36:33Speaker 03

  Oh god. Oh no.

• 36:34Speaker 04

  Have you never seen that? Oh, I'm obsessed with it. There's like, there's games that, there's computer games that do it. And I watched people playing it online and then I'd follow them.

• 36:42Speaker 05

  It's one of the few Doctor Who villains based on a primary school playground game.

• 36:46Speaker 03

  That, that's what it's called.

• 36:47Speaker 06

  Red light, green light.

• 36:49Speaker 05

  Rather than the other way around.

• 36:50Speaker 04

  It's usually a primary school playground game based on Doctor Who.

• 36:52Speaker 03

  It's all time, Mr. Wolf. That's, yeah.

• 36:54Speaker 05

  Yeah. That's essentially what it is, but with a big blue box.

• 36:57Speaker 03

  Fantastic. I, I always wanted a fear when I was younger. Isn't that ridiculous?

• 37:03Speaker 04

  Always wanted a fear.

• 37:04Speaker 03

  No, like I wanted a brace. I wanted glasses. Like I just, I didn't have anything.

• 37:07Speaker 04

  I wanted to have asthma.

• 37:08Speaker 03

  Didn't have a thing.

• 37:08Speaker 04

  You wanted to have asthma?

• 37:09Speaker 05

  I wanted to have asthma.

• 37:10Speaker 04

  When mine had an inhaler, I was like, you lucky bugger.

• 37:12Speaker 03

  Did you not want a thing when you were a kid?

• 37:14Speaker 06

  Yeah, I wanted train tracks, big time.

• 37:15Speaker 03

  Like the, the braces.

• 37:16Speaker 06

  Yeah, the whole full metal thing I wanted. Yeah.

• 37:19Speaker 03

  My sister got a nighttime brace. I used to wear it.

• 37:22Speaker 05

  A retainer.

• 37:22Speaker 04

  That sounds healthy.

• 37:24Speaker 03

  Disgusting. Well, I was just so jealous because I was like, there's nothing wrong with me.

• 37:29Speaker 06

  Yes. I want an allergy. I want something.

• 37:31Speaker 03

  Yeah, I've got something.

• 37:32Speaker 04

  It's the paraphernalia that I want. I remember I wanted glasses because a lad who sat next to us, he used to open his glasses case and put them on. I'm like, oh, he's got a thing. The inhaler. I didn't want to, I didn't want to not be able to breathe. I wanted to have the thing. You took the lid off it, you squeeze it. I play golf now. I like golf because it's all stuff.

• 37:49Speaker 05

  It's all stuff, yeah.

• 37:50Speaker 04

  It's all stuff. I'm playing in the club. I'm getting a born me tea. I've got all me little gadgets. I love it.

• 37:54Speaker 05

  That's why I, I shave with like a brush and soap and a proper kind of grandad razor and stuff for that exact reason.

• 38:01Speaker 04

  Cause you like the stuff.

• 38:02Speaker 05

  Cause I like the stuff. Or it's like, you know, making yourself a cup of tea with, you know, leaves rather than bags and stuff. It's, it's the ceremony, isn't it?

• 38:08Speaker 03

  Yes. I love a ceremony of, of anything.

• 38:12Speaker 04

  Oh yeah. You gave up the fucking altar though, didn't you?

• 38:15Speaker 03

  The Catholic guilt does get to us quite a lot. Do you get it?

• 38:17Speaker 06

  Uh, yeah. Yeah. Oh god, yeah. Self hatred and the, yeah, the shame. Shame, shame, shame, shame.

• 38:22Speaker 05

  I think the Catholics think the rest of us don't have that. You put it on the church when actually it's your problem.

• 38:28Speaker 03

  Good. No, that makes me good. Cause actually my kids, our children aren't being brought up in a relig-, they don't go to a religious school. And sometimes it breaks my heart because I want them to.

• 38:38Speaker 05

  Be shameful.

• 38:39Speaker 03

  To be shameful. To feel the shame. Cause I think it makes you a better person.

• 38:44Speaker 05

  Listen, you could argue quite strongly that the death of shame is why we're in the state we're, we're in. Like every, all politics post 2016 is politicians not giving a shit. And when in the old days, they would get caught doing some of the things they've been doing. And they go, I'm so sorry. They'd appear at the gate with their, their wife or husband and their children and some cups of tea for reporters and going, this has been a very, very difficult time for the family. And so, and they don't do that anymore. They go, fuck yes. And carry on. And that's sort of the death of shame.

• 39:11Speaker 04

  The death of shame.

• 39:12Speaker 03

  So you know what it is? Maybe we all do need a bit of shame back.

• 39:14Speaker 05

  Yeah. So take the kids down the Catholic church twice a week.

• 39:17Speaker 03

  Don't, don't.

• 39:17Speaker 05

  Drill it into them.

• 39:18Speaker 03

  One of them isn't christened and it, it's really upsetting. Only one of them's christened. Only one of them's gonna get.

• 39:24Speaker 04

  And I'm not christened. So Rosie thinks that like, as a family, when we all die and whatever car crash has got in our head, then two of them will go in and me and the other one won't.

• 39:33Speaker 05

  There's your sitcom. Half the Ramses in heaven, half the Ramses in hell. How are they gonna get back together?

• 39:37Speaker 04

  That's not a bad sitcom idea.

• 39:39Speaker 03

  Oh my god. It's like, no, cause yeah, it's like Stranger Things. You would be in the upside down.

• 39:44Speaker 04

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 39:44Speaker 03

  And we'd be in the, the normal one.

• 39:46Speaker 04

  What's your origins wrong? And in a better place? Cause I'm not, I'm not actively on the side of the wrong region.

• 39:51Speaker 03

  That's what we're gonna have to find out, isn't it?

• 39:52Speaker 04

  We've discussed this all in the sitcom, in the pilot.

• 39:54Speaker 05

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 39:55Speaker 03

  That's exciting.

• 39:56Speaker 05

  This is all for the writers' room. Don't worry about it.

• 39:58Speaker 03

  Also, you could bring in the global pandemic because that's why he didn't get christened. Cause it was during, he was born during COVID.

• 40:05Speaker 05

  Right.

• 40:05Speaker 03

  And I just, it was just too much.

• 40:07Speaker 04

  Cause when I had to do it with a super soak, I kind of took the, took the charm away.

• 40:11Speaker 06

  They couldn't do it over Zoom, no? Do the way so much of Catholic stuff is done over Zoom.

• 40:17Speaker 05

  Sucking it out of the font, blasting it out of the line of children. All in swimwear.

• 40:23Speaker 05

  The Lord blesses you.

• 40:27Speaker 03

  Right, Philippa, you're gonna read out a story for us, please, if you don't mind. I love this tight ensemble with the shoes. Gorgeous.

• 40:35Speaker 06

  Thank you so much. Main reason is I didn't put fake tan on my legs, so.

• 40:39Speaker 03

  Listen, it's paid off, it looks great. Good for you.

• 40:42Speaker 06

  Um, oh, uh, dear Chris and Rosie, please keep me anonymous. Um, after listening to Chloe Petz talk about being recognised with doctors, it reminded me of my own experience when I gave birth to my first child. At the time, I worked in the HR department of the very hospital where I planned to give birth. Part of my job involved recruiting doctors, processing their paperwork and meeting them before they started. When I was pregnant, I ended up needing to be induced and went into hospital on a Friday night. One of the doctors on the ward was someone I'd recruited and met several times before going on maternity leave.

• 41:16Speaker 04

  Oh, God.

• 41:17Speaker 03

  Oh, no.

• 41:17Speaker 06

  He was the doctor who examined me.

• 41:21Speaker 06

  Inserted my induction pessary and, over the course of the weekend, checked my dilation.

• 41:26Speaker 04

  Oh.

• 41:28Speaker 06

  Unfortunately, things didn't go to plan and I ended up needing an emergency C-section. And guess who performed it? The very same doctor. As I was being quealed into recovery afterwards, he suddenly turned to me and said, "Oh, are you the same blank from the HR department?" Uh, I sheepishly replied, "Yep, that's me." I just couldn't understand why he'd waited until after he'd seen absolutely everything inside and out to mention that he recognised me. It still haunts me to this day. I wonder if he ever thinks about it too.

• 41:56Speaker 04

  He, no.

• 41:57Speaker 03

  He'll not ca- he'll not care at all.

• 41:58Speaker 04

  She nailed that.

• 41:59Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 42:00Speaker 04

  Sorry, she nailed that. That, what a great booking. He's done all of the pre-care, he's done the pessary, he's done the dilation and then, oh, when you see section, I'll fucking do that as well.

• 42:08Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 42:08Speaker 04

  She's just a Swiss Army doctor.

• 42:10Speaker 06

  Yeah. That's, I, when I was reading, I was like, they did everything.

• 42:13Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 42:14Speaker 06

  That's, that's really good going.

• 42:16Speaker 03

  That's actually quite unknown, isn't it?

• 42:17Speaker 05

  Wouldn't you be quite insulted if he hadn't

• 42:19Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 42:19Speaker 05

  recognised you?

• 42:21Speaker 06

  Yeah, actually.

• 42:22Speaker 05

  He waited, so he went, "Four finger..." Yeah. Yeah.

• 42:27Speaker 03

  You won't recognise you.

• 42:29Speaker 05

  And you'll recognise it, it's when he's checking the dilation, you don't want him to recognise you.

• 42:33Speaker 06

  Yes, but like.

• 42:34Speaker 05

  Dilation, eye contact.

• 42:36Speaker 04

  Oh, from my bow, I mean. From HR.

• 42:39Speaker 06

  But the, the other, but, but it would be that thing of like, you, you know, if he didn't recognise her and like, six months goes by, or whenever she's back at work, like, she's not remembering, like, "Oh, oh, oh, right, yeah." That would be a bit more kind of weird, wouldn't it?

• 42:53Speaker 03

  I don't know, you see so many fannies every day. It's just like, whatever, it's another one.

• 42:58Speaker 06

  Exactly.

• 42:59Speaker 03

  Just a fanny with a face.

• 43:00Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 43:01Speaker 04

  Jesus.

• 43:01Speaker 05

  With a face.

• 43:02Speaker 03

  Fanny with a face.

• 43:03Speaker 04

  Well, uh, actually, yeah, no, you know what?

• 43:05Speaker 05

  Sounds like a vaudeville act.

• 43:05Speaker 04

  Yeah. You've actually hit on something here because maybe he didn't even take note of her face or her name or anything because he was so focused on the job at hand.

• 43:15Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 43:15Speaker 04

  And then it wasn't until afterwards that he was like, "Oh, it's you." Yeah.

• 43:18Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 43:19Speaker 04

  My, all that tells me is that she is incredibly good at her job. And she has literally hired the best possible person for the job, so there you go. And, and he didn't bring up any kind of HR problem he had with another colleague while he was inside us.

• 43:32Speaker 06

  No, that would be, yeah. That's a problem.

• 43:35Speaker 04

  While we're here, um, it's one of the, one of the guys, some of the jokes he's been telling in the staff room. Sweep. Guys, uh, thank you so much for coming on.

• 43:46Speaker 05

  Thanks for having me.

• 43:46Speaker 04

  Congratulations on a wonderful show that you've made and best luck with series two.

• 43:50Speaker 05

  Cheers, guys.

• 43:50Speaker 03

  Thank you.

• 43:51Speaker 04

  Thank you.

• 44:00Speaker 00

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• 44:16Speaker 02

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