S13 EP1: Hotdogs for Breakfast

We are back!! After a short break for the summer holiday we're ready for more adventures in life and parenting. Josh gets into a dispute on the plane, and Rob almost gets stranded on holiday trying to watch the football... ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Parenting Hell⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ is a Spotify Podcast, new video episodes available everywhere every Tuesday and Friday. Please subscribe and leave a rating and review you filthy street dogs... xxx If you want to get in touch with the show with any correspondence, kids intro audio clips, small business shout outs, and more.... here's how: EMAIL: [email protected] Follow us on instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@parentinghell⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ A 'Keep It Light Media' Production Sales, advertising, and general enquiries: [email protected] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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• 1:00Speaker 01

  Ugh, I hate Mondays.

• 1:02Speaker 02

  King's Hawaiian cinnamon swirl bite?

• 1:03Speaker 01

  Uh, Taylor Hansen? Sure, I'll try one. Mmm.

• 1:09Speaker 03

  Hey, let's get back to work, please.

• 1:10Speaker 01

  But Taylor Hansen's making my day way better with these new soft and swirly King's Hawaiian cinnamon bites.

• 1:15Speaker 03

  Taylor Hansen? Nice.

• 1:17Speaker 02

  Try one.

• 1:18Speaker 03

  Mmm.

• 1:22Speaker 04

  King's Hawaiian cinnamon bites. There's nothing like it.

• 1:30Speaker 05

  This episode is presented by Monzo. Josh, I love the summer holiday, aside from being asked for an ice cream every 32 seconds.

• 1:38Speaker 06

  Wow, Rob, that is why it's an ideal time to get them a free Monzo Kids account. Help build confidence and independence with their money. You can instantly send money or set up regular pocket money, and parents still have full visibility and control from their own Monzo app.

• 1:52Speaker 05

  Unlike the requests for ice creams from the kids.

• 1:54Speaker 06

  Monzo's award-winning kids account. Search "Monzo" for children aged 6 to 15. Parent or guardian account needed first. UK residents only. T's and C's apply.

• 2:07Speaker 05

  Hello, you're listening to Parenting Hell with...

• 2:12Speaker 06

  You've got to be kidding me.

• 2:15Speaker 05

  I'd say, Josh, this is peak Josh Whittaker disorganisation today. Skin looks good, though. Can you say Rob Beckett?

• 2:24Speaker 07

  What about Josh Wellercombe? Josh Weller.

• 2:29Speaker 05

  Are they stateside? Do they say your name in a good way?

• 2:32Speaker 06

  Yeah, and I like the the parents taking it in turns. Uh, this is, uh, Mo. That's a cool name.

• 2:40Speaker 05

  Like Mo, like Mo Molan, like.

• 2:43Speaker 06

  Like Mo Molan or Mo. Mo Slater or Mo.

• 2:46Speaker 05

  Big Mo, little Mo, cardboard Mo.

• 2:49Speaker 06

  Um, so we are big fans of the pod. Got into the show around when he was born, though not exactly sure when, since that time is a bit of a blur. We're not British in any way.

• 2:59Speaker 05

  Love it. No connection.

• 3:01Speaker 06

  Do you want to know what they found us through? Taskmaster, our gateway drug to British comedy. Last one laughing. Mo started repeating everything we say, which, uh, let me snag this recording. Unfortunately, it also led to him shouting free ball over and over when we had set him down without a diaper the other day. What's free ball? Is that one of the ones we've said?

• 3:18Speaker 05

  Uh, what the fuck's a diaper as well?

• 3:21Speaker 06

  Oh, yeah.

• 3:22Speaker 05

  I don't know. I'm so British. I don't even know what that means.

• 3:25Speaker 06

  Um, stateside and reliable. Becker, four hundred and four months. Brian, four hundred and six months.

• 3:29Speaker 05

  Two things here. Americans say your name with with respect. When people say your name in this country, it's sort of like a, would you come? Would you come? It's a bit flimsy whimsy. But it's a wooder can. Would it? It's like, woulda, woulda. It was quite strong.

• 3:42Speaker 06

  Too right. Too right, Rob.

• 3:44Speaker 05

  Taskmaster. I was, we came back from Crete, went to Crete on holiday. Um, and at Hania Airport, that I called Chania Airport for a year up until I got to Hania Airport. They do a thing where, classic, classic, summer holiday, small airport vibes. You sit in an air-conditioned airport until they board you for the plane and then make you stand outside in thirty two degrees behind the cordoned off area before the bus comes. So everyone's blood red, hot and angry from being quite chilled out. Anyway, as we're waiting, a guy comes over. When anyone in a high viz speaks to you at an airport, I'm stressed.

• 4:23Speaker 05

  I think I've done something wrong. I'm not getting on the plane. Uh, little Greek fella, uh, light me up, Taskmaster.

• 4:30Speaker 06

  Oh, here we go. Here we go.

• 4:32Speaker 05

  A Greek dude.

• 4:33Speaker 06

  Well, do you know what? It's that kind of.

• 4:34Speaker 05

  Calispara.

• 4:36Speaker 06

  Calispara indeed. Calamera.

• 4:39Speaker 05

  Calamera, Calispara.

• 4:40Speaker 06

  We almost didn't get allowed back on the plane on the way back from Greece.

• 4:44Speaker 05

  Why?

• 4:44Speaker 06

  Um, because, uh, totally fine on the way out there, totally fine on the plane out there. But then they called my daughter on having a cast on her arm.

• 4:57Speaker 05

  Oh, because I text you about this. People got in contact and said.

• 5:00Speaker 06

  They said it was unsafe. I don't know what they meant by that. They said, we'll have to speak to the captain.

• 5:05Speaker 05

  The pilot?

• 5:06Speaker 06

  The pilot, yeah.

• 5:08Speaker 05

  Captain, yeah.

• 5:09Speaker 06

  And then everyone walked.

• 5:11Speaker 05

  Why is he making the call? Surely that, or she?

• 5:13Speaker 06

  It's his plane.

• 5:15Speaker 05

  Or her, or her?

• 5:16Speaker 06

  Or her, no, it was his.

• 5:17Speaker 05

  It was a he, though.

• 5:19Speaker 06

  It was a he, yeah, yeah.

• 5:21Speaker 05

  Thank goodness.

• 5:24Speaker 06

  Sorry?

• 5:25Speaker 05

  Nothing. I was pretending to just be happy it was a male pilot, but I don't really care.

• 5:31Speaker 06

  Bit of fun. No. Um, he, so they had to get the captain, but we had to stand by, you know, the desk where they, they have one final look at your passport or your boarding pass or whatever it is. I never would know which one's which. Um, which desk was, before you get on the weird bus in the airport to get onto the plane. We had to stand there while everyone went past us, thinking we're not going to make it on air.

• 5:53Speaker 05

  Oh.

• 5:54Speaker 06

  Rose was livid. Um, and then the,

• 5:56Speaker 05

  Bless her.

• 5:57Speaker 06

  The, the plane were like, they couldn't care less. They couldn't have cared less.

• 6:02Speaker 05

  Yeah, it's weird, the car. So I don't know what they think's gonna happen. Obviously, she made it out there with it. So it's kicking off and does, the boiler's broke, the boiler's, I think that's the plumber. The boiler's not working.

• 6:12Speaker 06

  Oh, no.

• 6:14Speaker 05

  No, the boiler went off and we come back off holiday and then there was no pressure again today.

• 6:18Speaker 06

  What's it like with no central heating at the moment, Robert? It's awful.

• 6:23Speaker 05

  It's more the hot water we're missing than the radiator's. Um, anyway, so I found the thing you turn, obviously, to get the pressure up, basic level. Big boy stuff, or girl.

• 6:34Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 6:35Speaker 05

  Um, and anyway, as I turned it on, the pressure went up and then the boiler started pissing out water.

• 6:41Speaker 06

  Oh, no.

• 6:41Speaker 05

  It's not a good, it's not a good, good look, is it?

• 6:44Speaker 06

  No.

• 6:45Speaker 05

  So, um, I'm, do you mind if I quickly tell the plumber what's going on?

• 6:49Speaker 06

  What, does he not know?

• 6:50Speaker 05

  Or she, he said.

• 6:51Speaker 06

  Or she.

• 6:54Speaker 05

  Ah.

• 6:58Speaker 05

  No, but I don't think, I need to show where it's coming from. Quickly, I'll be two minutes.

• 7:03Speaker 06

  Do you not trust Lou to do it?

• 7:08Speaker 05

  Think quick, Rob. I was there when it first started leaking, so it's probably best a first person that saw it to feed back the information.

• 7:14Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, because those things are changeable. Yeah, yeah.

• 7:17Speaker 05

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 7:19Speaker 05

  Thanks guys, how about that? I'm back, I'm back. You don't get this on Netflix, on the rest is football.

• 7:27Speaker 05

  It was, Lou did do a great job, actually.

• 7:29Speaker 06

  Oh, yeah?

• 7:30Speaker 05

  So you didn't need, you weren't needed. I didn't, didn't even need to be there. Just went there, quick man's plane, back in the room.

• 7:35Speaker 06

  Yeah, good work. Was it a man?

• 7:36Speaker 05

  Yeah. Yeah, it was a man, yeah.

• 7:38Speaker 06

  Yep.

• 7:39Speaker 05

  Every time. Never, never met a female plumber, and that's much, that's more to my, that's more my problem.

• 7:44Speaker 06

  We've, we've, we've had a female plumber recently.

• 7:46Speaker 05

  Aren't you? I'm sorry, I'm not as great as you.

• 7:48Speaker 06

  No, I'm not saying we're great. Just, just saying that, you know, Devon's quite progressive. Oh, do you want to know another thing about?

• 7:56Speaker 05

  Devon's quite progressive. I'll tell you what, let's visit a couple of villages and we'll look at the sort of knitted toys they've got in a lot of the windows and see how progressive it is, shall we?

• 8:07Speaker 05

  Yeah?

• 8:07Speaker 06

  So, this is another thing, another two fingers up to London, Rob.

• 8:12Speaker 05

  We, we've not spoken for ages, by the way. Let's set the scene. We had a couple of weeks off because Michael was at the World Cup, I had a holiday, you had a holiday, so we're, we're back after the best of eps. That's now, that's what I call bloody chat.

• 8:25Speaker 06

  Yeah, this won't be making the best of it, but I do need to say it, Rob. I got my car insurance premium through.

• 8:30Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 8:31Speaker 06

  I've never seen something like it, Rob.

• 8:33Speaker 05

  The camera keeps pulsating as you move back and forward. Have you seen that, Michael? I thought I was having an out of body experience, sort of like, can't get you.

• 8:41Speaker 06

  You know, I'm about to drop a bomb about car insurance premiums.

• 8:45Speaker 05

  They're zooming in.

• 8:47Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 8:47Speaker 05

  It's self ended, it's AI.

• 8:48Speaker 06

  The camera's going, go on, let's, let's hear it.

• 8:51Speaker 05

  Sorry, go on, what do you want to say about your car insurance?

• 8:53Speaker 06

  So you know, you get the letter through where it says, last year it was this, this year it's this, and it's always like gone up 50 quid or whatever, you're like, oh, fine, that is what it is, right? Last year, 1,100.

• 9:04Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 9:05Speaker 06

  I think that's, you know, is what it is.

• 9:07Speaker 05

  It's just what it is, yeah.

• 9:08Speaker 06

  This year, 600 quid.

• 9:10Speaker 05

  Huh?

• 9:12Speaker 06

  Yeah. Too bloody right, mate.

• 9:15Speaker 05

  Why do you think? What's changed, mate? You're hosting Strictly now, so I know you're an absolute square. You're not out on rock, you're not a rock and roll road dog comic anymore.

• 9:29Speaker 06

  They know I'm dancing everywhere. So I.

• 9:32Speaker 05

  He can't, he won't crash a car, he's too quick footed.

• 9:37Speaker 06

  No, Rob, I'm not paying a London premium anymore. It just keeps paying out. It just keeps paying out.

• 9:45Speaker 05

  That's the Devon postcode.

• 9:47Speaker 06

  I've more or less covered my stamp duty. It's unbelievable.

• 9:51Speaker 05

  Okay, so the benefits just keep coming. This should be a good little feature. Unexpected, unexpected benefits and unexpected negatives of a move. That'll be good. And we can represent all different parts of the country.

• 10:05Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 10:05Speaker 05

  You know, I've moved to Newcastle, don't have to spend money on coats anymore. Stuff like that.

• 10:10Speaker 06

  Exactly, exactly.

• 10:12Speaker 05

  They hate that, the Jordies by the way. That gets booed if you do coat jokes.

• 10:16Speaker 06

  Does it?

• 10:17Speaker 05

  Yeah, because it is true and they don't like the fact it's true.

• 10:23Speaker 06

  Right.

• 10:23Speaker 05

  So it's almost like, it's sort of like you having a joke at them, but they're a bit defensive about it because it's sort of like, it's, it's quite funny that only they don't go out with coats on.

• 10:31Speaker 06

  And the super rich, the super rich don't go out with coats on.

• 10:34Speaker 05

  Don't they?

• 10:35Speaker 06

  No, because they never walk anywhere.

• 10:37Speaker 05

  Oh, they're always getting out of cars.

• 10:38Speaker 06

  They never, they never have coats.

• 10:41Speaker 05

  Okay, this is good to know.

• 10:42Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah.

• 10:43Speaker 05

  So Alan Shearer basically is topless all the time, super rich and a Jordie.

• 10:48Speaker 06

  Exactly, exactly.

• 10:49Speaker 05

  And and Dec must just float through worlds and shack it on.

• 10:52Speaker 06

  That Newcastle fan that was the big naked Jordie guy, the topless Jordie.

• 10:57Speaker 05

  Anne and Dec don't wear coats. You'd lose Dec. He's just a shack it guy.

• 11:00Speaker 06

  Shack it, well, and trousers, I'd hope.

• 11:02Speaker 05

  Do you know what I love now? Anne and Dec are doing a podcast. They have to take their little laptop on holiday with them like us.

• 11:08Speaker 06

  Do they?

• 11:14Speaker 06

  Comes to us all, guys. It comes to us all.

• 11:17Speaker 05

  You'll all be trying to get an adapter into a Greek plug socket at some point, Ant.

• 11:22Speaker 06

  Well, should we tell people what my morning, what happened, why our recording was delayed, Rob?

• 11:27Speaker 05

  Well, because you turn up to the hotel, this hotel that you're booking, just because it's got an amazing light source and you look about 10 years younger and everyone wants to fuck you. It's mental. All our clips.

• 11:37Speaker 06

  I do worry, it looks like to the reception, every, I haven't yet, because Michael books my room, so I never know what name it's under, which is a bit, which is always a bit complicated.

• 11:48Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 11:48Speaker 06

  And then they're like, that all, I have yet to, this is a different room, a different hotel.

• 11:53Speaker 05

  Can I stop, Josh? Sorry, can I stop? I think your t-shirt's too stripy and it's affecting the camera. It's trying to zoom in and out of you. Maybe do it topless.

• 12:02Speaker 06

  I'm not going to do it topless.

• 12:03Speaker 05

  But I'm just saying, remember this is visualized now as well. But don't you think, Michael, that, do you think it's the stripes that are in causing this zoom in and zoom out?

• 12:12Speaker 02

  It's, it's his movement. So if Josh moves closer, it's all trying to autofocus.

• 12:17Speaker 05

  What's Cam, what's, what's his new, what's happened to this guy, Michael? He's got new skin, a new room, and now this special, he's got his own camera crew.

• 12:24Speaker 02

  Yeah, he's like a sort of classical Hollywood starlet. He's just got Vaseline on the camera before we shoot.

• 12:30Speaker 05

  Yeah. What's the BBC done for me? He's done loads for Josh. Look at him, he's a new man.

• 12:38Speaker 06

  So, yeah, they always, it's so weird because I'm booking in a hotel room for, for two hours use in the afternoon. It always looks like I'm shagging.

• 12:47Speaker 02

  I like the idea. I might book you into a different hotel every time. So it spreads around to the whole of Exeter.

• 12:53Speaker 02

  Every hotel receptionist is like, yeah, he came to my hotel for a few hours as well.

• 12:57Speaker 05

  I've got a reservation for Sir Boncolot.

• 13:00Speaker 06

  Because, so the other problem with it is, I don't know whether I could sound working because I don't know whether like that's a miss, I want to say, oh yeah, I'm using, because I'm recording a podcast, but I don't know if that's a misuse of the room for business. Do you know what I mean?

• 13:12Speaker 05

  Oh yeah, but what's going to happen? You're going to get imprisoned.

• 13:15Speaker 06

  No, but they'll go, oh, sorry, sir, we can't.

• 13:17Speaker 05

  You can't do that because you're using it for a podcast.

• 13:19Speaker 06

  So I kind of, I'm evasive as to why I'm booking the room for a few hours in the afternoon.

• 13:26Speaker 05

  But you can't book it for hours, can you, Michael?

• 13:28Speaker 02

  Yeah, there's like, um.

• 13:30Speaker 07

  Day use hotel.

• 13:31Speaker 05

  Oh, how did you find out about that?

• 13:35Speaker 07

  Recording a podcast.

• 13:37Speaker 05

  Okay. Oh, because you're still getting work done on your house. So it's too loud and there's builders and the kitchen should be done before strictly.

• 13:47Speaker 06

  Some of us, when we've got workmen in the house, all women.

• 13:53Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 13:54Speaker 06

  We recorded a hotel. We don't just like take a break to go and chat to them about the boiler, even though our wife could probably do that for us.

• 14:02Speaker 05

  Fair enough. Okay. Just trying to, just trying to do my best. Um, but I'm quite far from a hotel, actually. I'm not in the big smoke like you.

• 14:10Speaker 06

  No, I know. I know. Um, what's your, what's your car insurance, Rob?

• 14:14Speaker 05

  Fucking loads. Well, did I tell you what happened? Did I tell you what happened with the bus?

• 14:18Speaker 06

  Oh, no. Oh, no. Hello, you all right? What do you need? Want to get something? Come in. What do you want to get?

• 14:27Speaker 05

  Anything that's good. My daughter's just in there trying to get something from the cupboard.

• 14:31Speaker 06

  Well, I'm trying to do a podcast.

• 14:33Speaker 05

  Sorry about that. I'm trying to work on summer holidays here at the Beckett House.

• 14:37Speaker 06

  Yep. See you in a bit. Summer holidays, man. Summer holidays. It's insane. Trying to get stuff done.

• 14:46Speaker 05

  Lou's got, Lou's working as well. So she's on a deadline. So she's working quite a lot. And then I'm working quite a lot. And then also I want to play golf.

• 14:53Speaker 06

  Yeah, I think the third one might be the problem.

• 14:55Speaker 05

  Is that someone hoovering? Can you hear that? This is, oh, this is bad.

• 14:59Speaker 06

  What's going on? Who's hoovering? Your plumber?

• 15:02Speaker 05

  Tell you what's funny about Lou is Lou.

• 15:04Speaker 06

  If Lou's hoovering, that's.

• 15:06Speaker 05

  Lou's one of the biggest.

• 15:08Speaker 06

  That's the actions of someone on a writing deadline is hoovering. That's an absolute.

• 15:12Speaker 05

  So we've been inventing jobs for the kids to do over, because they want more money. They want money to buy stuff, right? So we said, well, you're 10 and 8 now, so do stuff like dishwasher. So we've got a list of all jobs they can do for money. So basically what that means is nothing gets done properly, more mess is made. I have to clear up after the mess and then redo the job properly and it's costing me more money. I think, I think there might be a child up there pretending to hoover for two quid. Let me just go and tell them to stop.

• 15:41Speaker 06

  If it's Lou, that's an insane time of, it's a good way to do it though. Get them to do the jobs for two quid.

• 15:48Speaker 05

  Hi guys.

• 15:49Speaker 06

  Hello.

• 15:50Speaker 05

  Sorry about that.

• 15:51Speaker 06

  What happened?

• 15:53Speaker 05

  Child hoovering for two quid.

• 15:58Speaker 06

  I think that's a better outcome because if it was Lou, that'd be like.

• 16:01Speaker 05

  No, so this is so funny. Lou is the biggest procrastinator I know. Okay. Like, and she was, she basically will just write with a deadline. She always just does it right at the end. She can't do it in advance. She's supposed to be writing today. I, I cleaned out the garage, right? This morning, cleaning out the garage, sorting it out. And then, and then we've got the, one of the kids to shred bank, bank statements.

• 16:23Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 16:23Speaker 05

  For Kai, for two quid. Anyway, so I'm out there then go, I come back in, I'm like, bloody hell, they've really gone for it. They've been out there for ages. I'm walking, Lou's doing it. I was like, Lou, this is not a good use of your time. You've just done an hour of shredding. I was like, I know, but it's so cathartic. Anyway, so yeah, we're, we're knee deep in the, um.

• 16:42Speaker 06

  When's her deadline? Is her deadline during the summer holidays or is this gonna be?

• 16:47Speaker 05

  No, no, it's after, it's after. So there's no, she's not stressed about it yet. And she works better when she's a bit stressed about it, I think.

• 16:54Speaker 06

  Right, right.

• 16:58Speaker 05

  This episode is brought to you by Sainsbury's.

• 17:01Speaker 06

  Sainsbury's customers can save over £450 a year with the Nectar app, which sounds like a great deal to me, Rob.

• 17:08Speaker 05

  Do you know what my favourite thing in the supermarket is? You know, sometimes I get overwhelmed by the deals because it seems like there's a lot of deals. If you look at a supermarket, there's deals, right? But there's that thing like, if you're buying like washing tablets, there's a thing on the little label. It says like, that's the price per like a hundred grams or per tabs. So you can work out which one is the best deal.

• 17:28Speaker 06

  Yes.

• 17:29Speaker 05

  Do you know, you know what I'm talking about?

• 17:30Speaker 06

  I know exactly what you're doing. That, that is a good deal.

• 17:32Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 17:32Speaker 06

  Do you know what I used to do, Rob? As a student, I used to be obsessed with obviously saving money.

• 17:39Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 17:39Speaker 06

  I took the smallest room in our house and I negotiated that I would only pay £32 a week for that room, Rob.

• 17:46Speaker 05

  And how much was everyone else paying?

• 17:48Speaker 06

  56. I couldn't have doors on my wardrobe because. They there wasn't space to open them, so I just had the innards of a wardrobe.

• 17:54Speaker 05

  Just the innards of a wardrobe, yeah.

• 17:56Speaker 06

  It's so easy to help your money go further and make some big savings by using Nectar Prices and your Nectar Prices at Sainsbury's.

• 18:03Speaker 05

  Together, they can save you over £450 a year on your food shop. Download the Nectar app today and tap into big savings.

• 18:09Speaker 06

  Eighteen plus. Nectar app required. For full terms, see help.sainsbury.co.uk/help/nectarprices.

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• 19:17Speaker 01

  Ugh, I hate Mondays.

• 19:19Speaker 02

  King's Hawaiian Cinnamon Swirl, by?

• 19:21Speaker 01

  Uh, Taylor Hansen? Sure, I'll try one. Mmm.

• 19:27Speaker 03

  Hey, let's get back to work, please.

• 19:28Speaker 01

  But Taylor Hansen's making my day way better with these new soft and swirly King's Hawaiian Cinnamon Bites.

• 19:33Speaker 03

  Taylor Hansen? Nice. Try one. Mmm.

• 19:40Speaker 04

  King's Hawaiian Cinnamon Bites. There's nothing like it.

• 19:51Speaker 05

  Oh, can I, can I ask you a question?

• 19:52Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 19:53Speaker 05

  So we come back from holiday, had no food. So I looked in the freezer and I got out some hot dog buns and sausages.

• 20:00Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 20:00Speaker 05

  De-frosted them because we had no food for breakfast. In the morning, we had hot dogs. Well, that's what I'm saying. We had hot dogs for breakfast.

• 20:08Speaker 06

  Right.

• 20:09Speaker 05

  It feels mental. It feels like, what the hell are you doing?

• 20:11Speaker 06

  It does feel odd. But then you would have, you would have bread and you would have sausage.

• 20:16Speaker 05

  I mean, it's a sausage sandwich in a tube, isn't it?

• 20:18Speaker 06

  Yeah, exactly.

• 20:19Speaker 05

  But why, hot dogs for breakfast seems insane.

• 20:21Speaker 06

  Did you have ketchup?

• 20:22Speaker 05

  Yeah, I had mustard.

• 20:24Speaker 06

  You had mustard?

• 20:24Speaker 05

  That's a bit weird for the morning, isn't it?

• 20:26Speaker 06

  Well, do you know what? I'm, I'm sure Jamie Oliver says chili on his breakfast because it gives him a boost.

• 20:32Speaker 05

  What, a boost in the morning?

• 20:33Speaker 06

  Like, because chili does something to you, like, um, it sets, you know, it gets your adrenaline going or whatever like that. Do you know what I mean? So you might have got the same thing off the mustard.

• 20:42Speaker 05

  Yeah, I was buzzing. I felt really good. Good start to the day. Quick hot dog at the door.

• 20:46Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 20:47Speaker 05

  Quick hot dog at the door, up to Manchester. That was my morning.

• 20:50Speaker 06

  What? Are you in Manchester? No, you're not in Manchester.

• 20:52Speaker 05

  That was Saturday.

• 20:54Speaker 06

  Oh, right. I was gonna say, what the fuck's going on?

• 20:56Speaker 05

  I was in Manch- I got, got back off holiday Friday, went up to Manchester to do eight out of ten cats as countdown. Come back down, got in at 4am, then drove to my mum's birthday meal down in Sandwich.

• 21:08Speaker 06

  Are you all right with, you had a sandwich?

• 21:11Speaker 05

  No, no, no, it was in Sandwich.

• 21:13Speaker 06

  Oh, right. Sorry.

• 21:14Speaker 05

  This sounds like a, this, it was a lovely afternoon, but the, the setup of where we had lunch sounds like something from like a Phoenix Knights or sitcom. So we went for lunch at the cafe of a wakeboarding centre and inflatable water obstacle course with an Ed Sheeran tribute act.

• 21:35Speaker 06

  Incredible. But sorry, but you, you weren't doing wakeboarding or inflatable thing. You just wanted to use the cafe?

• 21:42Speaker 05

  Uh, yes. It's for my mum and dad's birthday meal and there was like 15 beckett's there.

• 21:47Speaker 06

  Have they got a connection to Sandwich?

• 21:49Speaker 05

  They, they live 10 minutes away, about 10, 15 minutes away. Um, so that's why they went there. And it's, it was nice food. It was a nice, nice vibe. But it's, on paper, it's a mad sell.

• 22:02Speaker 05

  You know what I mean?

• 22:03Speaker 06

  Was the Ed, was the Ed Sheeran tribute act there for your mum?

• 22:07Speaker 05

  No, he wa- he was there just, or she, it was.

• 22:11Speaker 06

  Of course.

• 22:13Speaker 05

  He was, he, well, I don't think he was just Ed Sheeran. I think he did, he did a lot of Ed Sheeran. He did other covers as well.

• 22:18Speaker 06

  Did he look like him?

• 22:20Speaker 05

  No, no, he wasn't. He was more doing covers and a lot of them were Ed Sheeran as opposed to, you know, bad clothes, terrible hair, smiley face.

• 22:28Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, of course, of course.

• 22:31Speaker 05

  So he was, he was singing, but he was, he's there anyway at the weekend, I think.

• 22:36Speaker 06

  Right, right.

• 22:38Speaker 05

  Surreal experience where like Ed Sheeran's on and he, and he's really good distributor. It sounds a lot like him. And then there's a guy like doing three sixties on the wakeboard track and you're like tucking into some nachos.

• 22:48Speaker 06

  What's a wakeboard?

• 22:50Speaker 05

  A wakeboard's like a tiny surfboard that you clamp your feet in like a snowboard. And then you normally hold on to the back of like, it's a bit like water skiing. Yeah. Yeah, but like it's on one plank as it were. But this centre is like you're on a, you hold on to a, a bit of rope that goes around in a circle like a track. If you know what I mean. So imagine a massive lake.

• 23:16Speaker 06

  So are you moving anywhere?

• 23:18Speaker 05

  Yeah, you, you, you hold on to this thing and it goes around this big loop track that I could track around the pond. And you hold on to that and then you can do jump.

• 23:25Speaker 06

  What's it attached to?

• 23:27Speaker 05

  Like that's above your head is like, almost like a.

• 23:31Speaker 06

  Almost like a zip wire.

• 23:32Speaker 05

  Yeah. Yeah, that goes around in a big circle of the, the, the, sort of the edge of the pond.

• 23:39Speaker 06

  And did you want to have a go?

• 23:40Speaker 05

  Well, no, you can have a go, but that wakeboarding one's quite an intense thing. But the inflatable course, we could have done with the kids. But it wasn't, it was only about 22 degrees and we were there for lunch.

• 23:51Speaker 06

  You're in this thing's castle on the hill.

• 23:53Speaker 05

  Well, exactly. And I don't want to do the inflatable course after having nachos, but then before we'd just be soaking wet, eating nachos.

• 24:00Speaker 06

  You can't enjoy Galway Girl if you're soaking wet.

• 24:03Speaker 05

  Exactly. I've done all of them, actually. It's actually really good.

• 24:06Speaker 06

  The ones I can do.

• 24:07Speaker 05

  It's really, it's really good. It's really good tribute act. I just wasn't expecting it at a wakeboarding centre for my mum and dad's birthday.

• 24:12Speaker 06

  Of cour-, of course. How old's your mum?

• 24:14Speaker 05

  My mum was 72, my dad was 82. My mum and sis-, uh, sister, my auntie Tina, were on shots at three in the afternoon, doing shots of baby Guinness.

• 24:24Speaker 06

  Fucking hell. What's baby Guinness? Sorry, I don't know any of these things. I'm unaware of everything that you've told me. What's a nacho?

• 24:35Speaker 05

  I bet you don't like nachos. It's a bit messy for you.

• 24:38Speaker 06

  I do like nachos. No, I do like nachos.

• 24:40Speaker 05

  No, no, you don't like nachos. You like tortilla crisps next to a pot of salsa.

• 24:45Speaker 06

  No, actually, no, I like the.

• 24:47Speaker 05

  You look all big and messy.

• 24:48Speaker 06

  I love melted cheese.

• 24:50Speaker 05

  Do you?

• 24:51Speaker 06

  Yeah, it's one of the reasons I love pizza. One of the big two reasons I love pizza, the other reason is the dough.

• 24:58Speaker 05

  Little Tom Tomato?

• 25:00Speaker 06

  It does a job. I don't like, I don't, in the sense that I will stay away from the area of the menu that's those white pizzas. No, thank you.

• 25:08Speaker 05

  So you wouldn't get involved in the white pizza?

• 25:11Speaker 06

  I always like the look. No, it's just cheese and toast really, isn't it? I feel like you're being ripped off.

• 25:15Speaker 05

  Make a ba- barbecue, barbecue sauce instead of tomato sauce, whichever.

• 25:19Speaker 06

  No, I don't, I don't want to mess with the classics.

• 25:22Speaker 05

  Yeah, fair enough. Most popular dish in the world, pizza surely? Pizza or fries?

• 25:27Speaker 06

  Yeah, I think so. We went to a, we went to a restaurant on Friday, Rob.

• 25:32Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 25:33Speaker 06

  And there was, I've never been caught in this situation before because I'd always go pizza normally, if it's an option.

• 25:39Speaker 05

  Well, what, always, wherever you are?

• 25:41Speaker 06

  If pizza's an option, I will always take it.

• 25:45Speaker 05

  Really?

• 25:46Speaker 06

  Yeah. I'd never go pasta. I think you're insane to go pasta if pizza's an option.

• 25:52Speaker 05

  Have I told you my burger rule?

• 25:54Speaker 06

  No.

• 25:54Speaker 05

  Burgers, I think, can vary so wildly. I've, and it's got me into a bit of a corner. I'll never eat a burger I've never eaten before.

• 26:03Speaker 06

  Oh, there you go.

• 26:04Speaker 05

  So I have to have had it once before, but then I can't find who.

• 26:07Speaker 06

  So you're stuck now. You're stuck now.

• 26:09Speaker 05

  I'd have to have a really strong personal recommendation to order a burger somewhere.

• 26:14Speaker 06

  So what, what is in and out of the, is there any biggies that you've never eaten that are causing problems?

• 26:20Speaker 05

  So Patty and Bun I've had, which I don't know if that's still going, but that was a good one. Um, never had a Bleecker Burger. It feels like that's, that they're a popular one that I've never really dabbled with.

• 26:30Speaker 06

  You've never had a Bleecker Burger or is that a review of Patty and Bun?

• 26:33Speaker 05

  Is it Bleecker Burger?

• 26:35Speaker 06

  Like Bleecker Street?

• 26:36Speaker 05

  But if it's a shop that just does burgers, I could be swayed because I'm like, well, they must know what they're doing. Whereas if I'm in like a, a random pub, I'm going, no, I need a burger. I mean, I've seen it arrive and I've watched someone eat it and I've spoken to them directly.

• 26:51Speaker 06

  Yeah. Do you know, I was once in a pub, uh, in Camden and I ordered a jacket potato.

• 27:00Speaker 06

  And the guy behind the bar said, I don't think we do food. And I said, I've got the menu here.

• 27:09Speaker 06

  And then 15 minutes later, he came out the kitchen, he'd made the jacket potato.

• 27:15Speaker 06

  It's mental. This guy didn't even think there was a kitchen 15 minutes ago. Now he's the one making my jacket potato.

• 27:21Speaker 05

  What a story.

• 27:22Speaker 06

  How rarely does this happen?

• 27:24Speaker 05

  We, well, I actually had a jacket potato at the wakeboarding centre.

• 27:27Speaker 06

  I love jacket potato.

• 27:29Speaker 05

  Well, jacket potato was on there. I didn't want a whole jacket potato. I wanted some nachos. So me and Lou said, why don't we get a tuna and cheese jacket potato and nachos and we'll share. Yeah?

• 27:39Speaker 06

  That's why you're a couple. That's why it still works.

• 27:41Speaker 05

  Guess what? Guess what came out in my order of jacket potato?

• 27:45Speaker 06

  What do you mean?

• 27:46Speaker 05

  So tell me what was on my plate. I ordered jacket potato, tuna and, tuna and.

• 27:52Speaker 06

  A potato, a potato, some tuna.

• 27:56Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 27:57Speaker 06

  Some cheese.

• 27:58Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 27:59Speaker 06

  And then three pieces of cucumber and two pieces of lettuce and half a tomato.

• 28:03Speaker 05

  Yeah, pretty much that. But one thing you're missing was another whole potato with tuna and cheese.

• 28:11Speaker 06

  So you've got two jacket potatoes?

• 28:13Speaker 05

  If you order, if you order jacket potato off the menu, you get two jacket potatoes?

• 28:18Speaker 06

  You can't deal with that. You can't expect it.

• 28:20Speaker 05

  You've got, I think you've got a sack. That's a sharing platter.

• 28:23Speaker 06

  Had they heard your conversation with Lou and they'd gone, do you know what? Shall we sneak him an extra jacket potato?

• 28:28Speaker 05

  It was massive. The portions, no, because everyone else had jacket potatoes, got two jacket potatoes. The portions are mental.

• 28:33Speaker 06

  And how big are the potatoes? What are the usual size?

• 28:37Speaker 05

  Well, my dad was going, do you reckon they just really, really work up an appetite wakeboarding?

• 28:42Speaker 06

  They can't be. I've never done enough exercise to go, I, do you know, I need two, two jacket potatoes now.

• 28:50Speaker 05

  And they were massive. They were like proper, like big as a coconut.

• 28:53Speaker 06

  And was the, was the filling ratio good?

• 28:57Speaker 05

  Massive. I can eat it.

• 28:58Speaker 06

  So was, so you had the filling for two as well?

• 29:00Speaker 05

  Yeah, but yeah, what like filling for two on either, on both of them?

• 29:05Speaker 06

  Yeah, bloody hell.

• 29:06Speaker 05

  Anyway, just, I just, I've never ordered a jacket potato and got two jacket potatoes before.

• 29:10Speaker 06

  No.

• 29:11Speaker 05

  No.

• 29:12Speaker 06

  I reckon, I reckon all again. Will you go back there?

• 29:15Speaker 05

  Well, it was a four hour round trip, so probably not, like.

• 29:20Speaker 06

  I'm good.

• 29:21Speaker 05

  No offence to any, anything or anyone involved. It's a long way for two jacket potato. I'd rather stay nearby and have one.

• 29:29Speaker 06

  Of course, or just order two.

• 29:31Speaker 05

  Yeah, and share it. You didn't even need that joke.

• 29:33Speaker 06

  I don't think anyone would say, you know, that would be two goes from you to order two jacket potatoes.

• 29:38Speaker 05

  No, but I think even before I was earning, jacket potatoes were never really a sort of, you know, goal, a goal food for me.

• 29:46Speaker 06

  No, no.

• 29:47Speaker 05

  I think I've always been very privileged enough to be able to afford a jacket potato. I'm, I'm always been in that realm. Quality of jacket will obviously vary, but I'd say at a bog standard level, I was, I could always afford a jacket potato at certain points in my life. Especially back in the, you know, teens, 20 teens.

• 30:05Speaker 06

  Tell you where they don't like a jacket, Rob. Newcastle.

• 30:08Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 30:09Speaker 06

  There we go. There we go.

• 30:11Speaker 05

  Why are you boarding?

• 30:15Speaker 05

  Week boarding.

• 30:16Speaker 06

  Oh, Rob, I've got to tell you about, someone got angry with me. I thought you'd enjoy this.

• 30:22Speaker 05

  Oh, and I like it. You don't get angry back, do you?

• 30:24Speaker 06

  Not really, no. Um, so I was, it was on the plane back from holiday in Greece.

• 30:31Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 30:32Speaker 06

  I went up to the toilet at the front, yeah, and there was, there was a queue, right? And then, you know, the front seats, um, there was someone on the window seat and then there was two empty seats, right? So I perched on the, um, the arm of the, the, the N deadly, eh, empty seat.

• 30:53Speaker 05

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 30:54Speaker 06

  And then, um, I looked down and my, my shoe was undone.

• 31:00Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 31:01Speaker 06

  So I put it up on the corner of that seat, put the, on the, the plastic.

• 31:06Speaker 05

  The sole of your shoe went on the seat?

• 31:08Speaker 06

  Yeah, and then, I'm fine, I made a mistake. The woman said, excuse me, that's my husband's chair. I said, fine, put it down.

• 31:16Speaker 05

  Right, okay, the woman that was sat down at the end?

• 31:18Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 31:19Speaker 05

  Yeah. So she's having a go. You've said, you've said sorry. You've, hands up, apologize.

• 31:23Speaker 06

  She doesn't accept the apology.

• 31:25Speaker 05

  In what regard? Can you, can you, can you say what she said? So-

• 31:28Speaker 06

  She tries to continue the-

• 31:30Speaker 05

  I'll be you, I'll be you. I'll be you, you be her. I'm doing my shoe-

• 31:33Speaker 06

  Excuse me, that's my husband's seat.

• 31:35Speaker 05

  Oh, sorry about that. I'll, I'll take my foot off.

• 31:38Speaker 06

  Because the thing is, if you, if you're gonna put your feet on the seat, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da.

• 31:43Speaker 05

  Oh yeah, oh yeah, sorry. But she just carried on explaining.

• 31:46Speaker 06

  So I just kind of turned and queued up.

• 31:50Speaker 06

  Then a guy comes out, the guy comes out, the thing-

• 31:53Speaker 05

  Are you worried about how big he is?

• 31:54Speaker 06

  Uh, if I was to give you his build, who's the guy, who's the guy that cheated on Lily Allen? That kind of build.

• 32:02Speaker 05

  Oh, big old, big guy, big, strong guy then. Yeah, I got you.

• 32:05Speaker 06

  But yeah, but not in the way where you go, he works out in the way where you go. He's big in everywhere.

• 32:11Speaker 05

  And in.

• 32:12Speaker 06

  So I'm queuing up to go in. He whacks me in the back, like, goes past me, like, he goes, sit down. And then he does, you know, like Richard Ashcroft in the Urban Hymns kind of-

• 32:24Speaker 05

  He walks back towards the toilet.

• 32:26Speaker 06

  Yeah, like a footballer off the ball.

• 32:28Speaker 05

  No, like an Argentinian defensive midfielder.

• 32:31Speaker 06

  Argent, yeah. And then he goes past me and he goes, did you put your foot on my seat?

• 32:37Speaker 05

  Oh, so he barges into you and to get in front of you?

• 32:40Speaker 06

  Yeah, to, to get some napkins to wipe down the seat.

• 32:46Speaker 05

  How old is this twat?

• 32:48Speaker 06

  Oh, I've got a photo of him actually. I took a photo.

• 32:51Speaker 05

  Send it now, send me, send it now. And I wanna, I wanna look at him as I rip him apart. Cause this bloke's a fucking loser.

• 32:57Speaker 06

  It gets worse, Rob. And then the, he's so angry.

• 33:00Speaker 05

  So what did you say? What did you say?

• 33:01Speaker 06

  I said, I'm sorry. I, you know, you're just like, I said, sorry. You know, I, it's all I can do.

• 33:08Speaker 06

  He won't accept. He sits down with his napkins. The, um, the air steward obviously has to go over and check he's all right.

• 33:18Speaker 05

  Absolutely, yeah.

• 33:18Speaker 06

  Yeah. And then the air steward comes back and he's like, God, there's one on every flight, isn't there? And like confides in me. I obviously think this is my chance to dig in.

• 33:30Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 33:31Speaker 06

  I start laughing away with the air steward in full.

• 33:38Speaker 05

  You got a big laugh as well.

• 33:40Speaker 06

  Yeah, I really, I really go for it in the charming chat with the air steward, all of them. I just really.

• 33:46Speaker 05

  Just your, your, yeah.

• 33:48Speaker 06

  Also, by the way, at that point, a woman comes up to say she's a fan of me. Absolutely perfect timing. I was like, this is glorious. Then later in the flight, I come out the toilet.

• 34:01Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 34:01Speaker 06

  The woman's still staring at me. Even as I walk down the aisle, she cranes her neck over her seat to to kind of evil me as I walk down. I've said sorry at this point. All I've done is say sorry.

• 34:13Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 34:14Speaker 06

  An hour later, I know it's an hour later because they're delivering drinks. I hear two air stewards.

• 34:20Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 34:20Speaker 06

  Talking. One of them goes, he's still cleaning his seat with a napkin.

• 34:27Speaker 06

  And the other one goes, it's been an hour.

• 34:35Speaker 06

  It was mad.

• 34:37Speaker 05

  Oh my God. What is that then?

• 34:41Speaker 06

  Well, obviously he might be germophobic or OCD or something like that. So, you know.

• 34:46Speaker 05

  We've got a fucking private jet then.

• 34:48Speaker 06

  Yeah, but yeah.

• 34:50Speaker 05

  There won't be other people on this plane.

• 34:51Speaker 06

  So, so let's be honest, an air conditioned plane with 200 people and it's not ideal.

• 34:57Speaker 05

  Well, because it can't.

• 34:58Speaker 06

  It was so weird.

• 34:59Speaker 05

  Because if he.

• 35:00Speaker 06

  Honestly, I, I was, at the end, I was also like, oh God, is he going to confront me as we get off? But he was one of those guys. You know, the person who, when you get off.

• 35:10Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 35:11Speaker 06

  When the moment you stand up, he was up and straight to the front so that he could be the first out, even though he's in the front row.

• 35:17Speaker 05

  Straight.

• 35:17Speaker 06

  He was basically. Yeah, but then he had to wait so long at the.

• 35:22Speaker 05

  Oh, for his case.

• 35:24Speaker 06

  For his case.

• 35:24Speaker 05

  Cause there's two things here. One is like his ego's being like sort of challenged by you putting your foot on his seat. Also, the germ's only gonna go on his like jeans or his shorts. Oh, some people are mad, aren't they?

• 35:36Speaker 06

  It was so, but do you know what? It made me go. Do you remember when I said to that guy, what's this really about?

• 35:42Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 35:43Speaker 06

  Write in if you've got any, what's this really about? Cause that felt to me like a real classic.

• 35:48Speaker 05

  Yeah, that one. Yeah. What's this really about? That's a good little sexy.

• 35:50Speaker 06

  What's going on here?

• 35:51Speaker 05

  Yeah. Why have you done that?

• 35:53Speaker 06

  Why are you so angry at me? Because I've apologised. I, all right, that is a mistake that I've totally accepted. I haven't gone, I'll put my foot where I fucking want, love. Do you know what I mean?

• 36:04Speaker 05

  You've not gone back on. It's only the corner. Why are you being so uppity? You've immediately apologised.

• 36:09Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 36:10Speaker 05

  I tell you what, weird thing happened to me at the, we was at the buffet of the hotel, right?

• 36:14Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 36:14Speaker 05

  And I put some toast in, so four slices of toast. So there's two toasters, right? With four, four gaps in, one, one side of this bench and there's one the other side of this bench, right? Anyway, so I put four slices of toast in for us, me, Lou and the kids. Anyway, I go away, come back, go in front of me. Just pops up my toast, takes it.

• 36:35Speaker 06

  That's not on. That's not on.

• 36:37Speaker 05

  I've never seen that in my life.

• 36:39Speaker 06

  You're not gonna argue for it. He thinks that there's just a constant toast going through.

• 36:43Speaker 05

  I don't know, but who thinks that?

• 36:45Speaker 06

  That the, the, the service is so good that they're constantly filling the toaster and you can come and take the toast.

• 36:52Speaker 05

  Four options of bread. There was like white, brown, sourdough and then like some gluten free one. So it's like, hang on. How do you even know you want that one?

• 37:04Speaker 06

  Maybe it's happened to him, Rob. Maybe it's continuing.

• 37:06Speaker 05

  I was just stood there going, he's stealing my toast.

• 37:09Speaker 06

  And did you think to step in?

• 37:12Speaker 05

  No, I was, well, one, I was in shock because I've never, I've been in a lot of, I've been in a lot of hotel buffets. Never seen it, never seen that in my life. I've had people being a bit annoyed they're waiting or a bit like, oh, you know, like that. But never someone that just walks over. But like, I'd gone off to get other bits, so I'd left it unattended.

• 37:30Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 37:30Speaker 05

  But because it takes longer to do. But then I thought, do I say something? But I'm like, no, I don't want to be that guy. Like, it's like, there's loads of bread. And I had nothing to do that day. Just got a line of sun for a bit.

• 37:40Speaker 06

  Exactly, exactly. You're on holiday, who cares?

• 37:43Speaker 05

  I'm going to go and toast myself.

• 37:46Speaker 06

  Oh, can I say for the holiday thing, the blue marigold, big blue, basically big blue glove for the arm.

• 37:58Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 37:58Speaker 06

  It does work and it saved the holiday. However, on day five, it did start leaking. It got a bit stretched. So I would suggest, if you've got the money, take more than one blue marigold.

• 38:14Speaker 05

  How much was it?

• 38:15Speaker 06

  Like 20 quid or something. I mean, worth it for what it got.

• 38:18Speaker 05

  Yeah, of course.

• 38:19Speaker 06

  Yeah. So I would, I would double up because you're in a situation where you can't. But also my daughter did then invent a way to save it. So if, if you've got a leak, it's slightly leaking blue marigold. She then tied a T-shirt around the top of her cast. So that any water that got in would then get soaked up by the T-shirt that was, so a T-shirt over the cast and then a marigold over the T-shirt.

• 38:49Speaker 05

  Respect.

• 38:53Speaker 01

  I hate Mondays.

• 38:54Speaker 02

  Kings Hawaiian cinnamon swirl bite?

• 38:56Speaker 01

  Taylor Hanson? Sure, I'll try one.

• 38:59Speaker 02

  Mmm.

• 39:02Speaker 03

  Hey, let's get back to work, please.

• 39:03Speaker 01

  But Taylor Hanson's making my day way better with these new soft and swirly Kings Hawaiian cinnamon bites.

• 39:08Speaker 03

  Taylor Hanson? Nice.

• 39:10Speaker 02

  Try one.

• 39:11Speaker 03

  Mmm.

• 39:15Speaker 04

  Kings Hawaiian cinnamon bites. There's nothing like it.

• 39:26Speaker 05

  Also as well, I know we mentioned it before, but my kids, the Nido situation at security, my kids.

• 39:32Speaker 06

  We've got into Nidos.

• 39:34Speaker 05

  Yeah, so they stop them at security and it takes ages and I told my kids not to pack any, they packed them anyway. So both bags got searched. And sometimes they will take them away from you.

• 39:45Speaker 06

  Yes.

• 39:46Speaker 05

  If you've got a horrible thingy and you do not want a crying kid with no Nido on the way out.

• 39:50Speaker 06

  No, no, exactly. Good point. Very good point.

• 39:53Speaker 05

  Good point. Good point, mate. Thanks. Thanks. Thanks, everyone. Anything else going on? What's, what's your, have you got a chill summer? What's going on with you?

• 40:00Speaker 06

  Well, we've got, we've got a wall chart.

• 40:03Speaker 05

  Yeah. World Cup wall chart.

• 40:06Speaker 06

  We've got a wall chart. Don't, oh, can I talk, can I, you can veto this. Can I read out the texts you sent about possibly going to the final and the reasons you shouldn't go?

• 40:18Speaker 05

  Yeah, go on. We can always bleep a bit of it too. So basically, I was in Greece and I was coming back on the Friday. I had work on the Saturday, but I could get to the World Cup final if England made it by flying out Sunday morning at 7:30 AM to get in at 10:30 AM. Now, I had a flight held just in case England got to the World Cup finals before I had to be there. But by doing that, I had to cancel and change a lot of things. And I, and I was trying, just texting Josh about it.

• 40:50Speaker 06

  Okay, so you've put, I can get a ticket for the final, not, not sure to go or not if we make it. Would fly out 7:30 AM on the day of the final. I'd have to cancel loads of work stuff. Everyone would hate me. I'd have to watch France win 3-0, which proved very incorrect on both counts.

• 41:15Speaker 05

  Poor prediction, that.

• 41:16Speaker 06

  Yeah. It would be my fourth final defeat in a row. Plus, I'd say, England v France would be the biggest underdog out of those finals. What are you cancelling? Filming? Someone's flying in from Geneva to do the filming. And then you've put, I'm in two minds. I would also miss my parents' lunch on Sunday and a date night with Lou on Monday. That's tonight. Might just ma- might just make it an event at home with the Lou and the girls and a couple of friends. I've been to America three times this year already. As well as Malaysia and China, it's July. I'm currently in Greece.

• 41:53Speaker 06

  I went to Dubai for a gig and I'm off to France and Germany in two weeks for a road trip for TV. F-ing Nora, I'm gonna combust, I think so. Day later, I've booked my plane.

• 42:12Speaker 05

  I'm, oh, I'm a nightmare. I can't, I just can't. You know what it is?

• 42:19Speaker 06

  Throughout that conversation, I thought, there's no doubt he's going. There's no doubt.

• 42:23Speaker 05

  I can't, it's not FOMO as much. I just sort of, my mentality is, we're here for such a short amount of time. If you've got the capability or the ability to go and do something, you want to do. Just, like Burnham's in now, we'll sort it out.

• 42:40Speaker 05

  His speech going, yeah, it's a nightmare. We've had six prime ministers in 10 years. You've not fucking helped that.

• 42:50Speaker 06

  Was there part of you when we lost, a small part of you that thought, at least I don't have to go to, well, I don't, you know, that choice is no longer.

• 42:59Speaker 05

  Yeah, no, I, I, I think as well, France or Spain, I think England would have lost.

• 43:04Speaker 06

  Yes.

• 43:05Speaker 05

  If we got there, do you know what I mean? I, I just, I just think they're, you know, our defence is too leaky and they're both so good attacking wise.

• 43:11Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 43:11Speaker 05

  And, well, no, we did beat France in the third place playoff, but that wasn't a normal game, was it? That was like a freak game.

• 43:17Speaker 06

  Imagine if that had been the final.

• 43:20Speaker 05

  I mean, I don't want to talk about football and I don't know when this is going out, but the fact Saka was fully fit and never got brought on makes my rage vomit. I can't, I can't, let's not do this.

• 43:30Speaker 06

  Rage and I go to sadness. I, I.

• 43:33Speaker 05

  Do you know what? I only go to, I, I go to rage with England with Arsenal. With Arsenal, I'm a bit more, nah, is what it is. But I'd say. Because I don't think I went to, I didn't go to Arsenal as a kid with my family, my dad and that. And it didn't feel so viscerally real. I used to watch on the TV. But England games were such a big event growing up. There'd be all different family and friends around. A lot of tears and stress and crying and all that. So it feels more real. So.

• 44:02Speaker 06

  Anyway, anyway, we'll save that. Well, let's, do you know what, Rob?

• 44:06Speaker 05

  I've got to tell you where I watched it.

• 44:08Speaker 06

  Could I just, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, go on. Because I need to tell you where I watched the games.

• 44:12Speaker 05

  We're in a nice resort, right, in Greece, but it was like not, because it's a nice fancy resort. It was an all-inclusive, but like they don't really have TVs. There was a TV in the room, but the TV, when I tried to watch the France Spain game, kept on glitching. And I think it was a connectivity issue because everyone was watching it.

• 44:30Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 44:30Speaker 05

  So if too many people are on one system, it can go glitchy.

• 44:33Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 44:33Speaker 05

  I was like, I can't roll the dice for the England game here because I watched the Norway one on an iPad in my bedroom.

• 44:39Speaker 06

  Yes. Oh, right. So this was the semi-final against Argentina.

• 44:43Speaker 05

  Argentina. So I'm like, right, what are we doing here?

• 44:45Speaker 06

  I had the same one with the Norway one.

• 44:47Speaker 05

  You went to a hotel bar, didn't you?

• 44:50Speaker 06

  Yeah, because the TV was in the room where my family was asleep.

• 44:55Speaker 05

  Yeah. Well, my TV wasn't working properly. So anyway, for the Argentina one, they went, oh, we're putting a bigger TV out down by the beach. There's more space. I went there at nine o'clock. Game was 10 o'clock. Rammoed. Not, not barely places to stand to have one watch it. And I'm like, I can't deal with this. This is too much. And also, because I was just milling about, there's a lot of people. I couldn't really chat to the kids because they wanted, they were chatting to me because I'm off the TV and all that. And I thought, I can't do this. So anyway, I went up to the, because this is what I struggle with in fancy resorts. I always feel like I've got more in connection with the people working there than the people staying there.

• 45:27Speaker 06

  I made a friend, I made a nice friend. She was a listener of the podcast.

• 45:32Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 45:34Speaker 06

  Shout out to Meg. She was a guest and she got to watch the Norway game in exchange for her husband was going to go out for the semi-final. And going, because they had two kids. So he was doing the kids for this one. And then she was going to do the kids for the semi-final. We were the same level of caring, but there was like Norway fans. It was quite fun. But we weren't like the furious angry. But there was a guy who was just like.

• 46:01Speaker 05

  Argentina and Norway, they're different propositions to play against.

• 46:04Speaker 06

  I know, I know. There was a guy next to us when, and I know he messed up in the Argentina game, but you know, against Norway.

• 46:12Speaker 06

  They made a substitution and this guy just goes, oh, he's got his favourites, hasn't he? And I thought, yeah, because it's a football squad. He has got his favourites. He hasn't brought 26 players of the same ability.

• 46:27Speaker 05

  I'm looking 24 people.

• 46:28Speaker 06

  To Bellingham because he's better than all the other players.

• 46:33Speaker 05

  He's my favourite, that's why I pick him. While we watched, I'll just talk about the Argentina game. So I asked someone, look, he's too busy here, where would you watch the game in the local town? You went, go to Breeze Bar. It's called Breeze Bar.

• 46:46Speaker 06

  I'd go, that does not sound like the right recommendation.

• 46:49Speaker 05

  I knew it was.

• 46:51Speaker 06

  Crowds and Indian fans.

• 46:52Speaker 05

  I knew immediately it was the right one, right? So anyway, I get a cab, this is nine o'clock, I go, right, who wants can of adventure? Get 100 euros out of cash point, boom, we're in a cab.

• 47:02Speaker 06

  So sorry, is your whole family going to Breeze Bar?

• 47:05Speaker 05

  Yeah, with iPads. So anyway, we're in a car, lose up, lose well up for Breeze Bar, right?

• 47:12Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah.

• 47:12Speaker 05

  I quite like a normal bar.

• 47:14Speaker 06

  What time's kickoff in Greece?

• 47:16Speaker 05

  10pm.

• 47:18Speaker 06

  10pm, okay.

• 47:18Speaker 05

  I'm in a cab to Breeze Bar, we get to Breeze Bar, we sit there. Anyway, the geezer from the resort says I've meshes the owner. I get there, he's like, Mr. Rob, come this way, I'm treated like a king. He puts me upstairs, because it's downstairs with a few English tourists, but he went always upstairs. So he went upstairs, massive air con unit, right in front of a TV, perfect. Got a drink, they come, give us food, drinks, kids have some chips, got their iPads.

• 47:40Speaker 06

  That's the breeze that gave him the name, presumably.

• 47:43Speaker 05

  Exactly, I'll Breeze Bar, beautiful, right, good food as well, right on the front, lovely. Sit down, enjoy it, few Argentinians behind us, which is quite stressful. There's just, the only people upstairs are English, next to me, young couple in their twenties, right, lovely. Anyway, me and him are cheering, everyone else is like going, anyway, we lose, it's awful. And ironically, the Argentinians went, they went, fuck you, England, that's because you didn't try and play football.

• 48:07Speaker 06

  Are you kidding?

• 48:09Speaker 05

  That come back to buy them in the final. That absolute dirge fest. Anyway, so we lose, it's midnight, we leave Breeze Bar. I've just realised that I'm in the middle of nowhere with 20 euros and no idea how to book a cab, get a cab. Don't even know where we're going.

• 48:25Speaker 06

  How are your kids?

• 48:26Speaker 05

  Fine, they have got iPad. Anyway, as I'm coming out, a couple of English people talk to me. The 20 year old couple, they're in there. The 20 year old couple, I start chatting to them and I say, do you know anyone? I go, um. Need to get a cab. Do you know how to get a cab? He went, I don't know. I've driven. I'm like, we're in here. This is good news. Like what? He went, oh, we've driven. Oh, you've got a hire car, have you? And I was like, don't fancy dropping us back, do you?

• 48:56Speaker 05

  Anyway, Joe drove me home. They wouldn't let us in the hotel resort. I had to give him my name, my room number and a card. But it was a fun night out. We enjoyed it. Shame about the result. Apologies to Meg, Joe and Connie.

• 49:08Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 49:08Speaker 05

  If you do a small business.

• 49:10Speaker 06

  Hi, Rob, Josh and Michael. Long, long time listener, navigating full time work and summer holidays over here. Having heard Rob talk about how he's trying to get good at golf to go on golf holidays. I'd love a small business shout out from my friend Jamie and Golf Sherpa, who may just be able to help. As a toddler dad with a full time job, Jamie launched Golf Sherpa as a side hustle in 2025 after years of organising golf holidays for friends. Golf Sherpa is a golf management service that saves golfers time and money by designing and delivering unforgettable golf experiences. Handling bookings and logistics before an event and an app to manage the competition in real time.

• 49:50Speaker 06

  Jamie and Golf Sherpa colleagues Stephen and Ben have already taken the golf world by storm, securing partnerships with some top golf hospitality venues. And having made it to the finals for entrepreneurial competitions, Scottish Edge and The Heat. Visit golfsherpa.co.uk or golf sherpa on Instagram. Thanks so much. Harriet in Berzdun, pronounced Berzden, yes, really? I got it right. Near Glasgow.

• 50:16Speaker 05

  Hello, you schmexy schmexy schlags. I'd like to shout out a small business in Coventry, Urban Sandwich. The sandwiches are next level with bread made fresh daily, seed oil free, stacked with flavour. Also delicious. They're based in West Orchard's Coventry and well worth a visit. The main chef has been through a tricky couple of years and I'm sure he'd appreciate a few extra customers. They do hot and cold sarnies and breakfast flatbreads at good prices. The Insta is urban underscore sandwich underscore Coventry. Tara, ducks, Hannah. There you go. Urban Sandwich. Let's get involved. Josh, would you like to play golf with me?

• 50:53Speaker 06

  Nine holes, not 18, I'd say.

• 50:55Speaker 05

  How about we play nine and then finish on the 10th, if you know what I'm saying?

• 50:59Speaker 06

  Oh, here we go. Someone's all over the day.

• 51:06Speaker 01

  Ugh, I hate Mondays.

• 51:08Speaker 02

  King's Hawaiian Cinnamon Swirl Bite?

• 51:09Speaker 01

  Uh, Taylor Hanson? Sure, I'll try one. Mmm.

• 51:15Speaker 03

  Hey, let's get back to work, please.

• 51:17Speaker 01

  But Taylor Hanson's making my day way better with these new soft and swirly King's Hawaiian Cinnamon Bites.

• 51:21Speaker 03

  Taylor Hanson? Nice.

• 51:23Speaker 02

  Try one.

• 51:24Speaker 03

  Mmm.

• 51:28Speaker 04

  King's Hawaiian Cinnamon Bites. There's nothing like it.