It started with a mix

More adventures in parenting and beyond with Rob and Josh... This ep it's a bit of inbox correspondence from the listeners and some of the best bits from our guests this series while we take a short break. Back very soon with series 13!!! 1. Harry Hill 2. Lauren Laverne 3. Tom Davis 4. Chantel Nash Listen and / or watch the full episodes on Spotify. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Parenting Hell⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ is a Spotify Podcast, new video episodes available everywhere every Tuesday and Friday. Please subscribe and leave a rating and review you filthy street dogs... xxx If you want to get in touch with the show with any correspondence, kids intro audio clips, small business shout outs, and more.... here's how: EMAIL: [email protected] Follow us on instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@parentinghell⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ A 'Keep It Light Media' Production Sales, advertising, and general enquiries: [email protected] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

• 0:00Speaker 00

  For adults with Crohn's disease or ulcerative colitis symptoms, every choice matters.

• 0:07Speaker 00

  Tremfya offers self-injection or intravenous infusion from the start. Tremfya is administered as injections under the skin or infusions through a vein every four weeks, followed by injections under the skin every four or eight weeks. If your doctor decides that you can self-inject Tremfya, proper training is required. Tremfya is a prescription medicine used to treat adults with moderately to severely active Crohn's disease and adults with moderately to severely active ulcerative colitis, serious allergic reactions, increased risk of infections or lower ability to fight them, and liver problems may occur. Before treatment, get checked for infections and tuberculosis. Tell your doctor if you have an infection, flu-like symptoms, or need a vaccine. Explore what's possible. Ask your doctor about Tremfya today.

• 0:52Speaker 00

  Call 1-800-526-7736 to learn more, or visit tremfyaradio.com.

• 1:01Speaker 01

  Pink Pantheress here. Coach and Spotify are teaming up to bring music and style together, and they want you to be part of it. Grab your friends and head to the Tabby Tour, hitting cities around the country with live performances from special artists, exclusive experiences, and personalized products. And discover custom playlists on Spotify, booked just for you based on who you are and how you listen. Live your story with Coach. Learn more at coach.com.

• 1:29Speaker 02

  This episode is brought to you by State Farm. Football has a play for just about everything. You can go deep, keep it on the ground, or draw up something nobody sees coming. And whether you want to run a flea flicker or the tush push, you need a plan to fit your unique situation. That's why State Farm takes the time to get to know you, so they can help personalize coverage for your life and budget. Now that's a solid game plan. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there.

• 1:57Speaker 03

  This episode is presented by Monzo. Josh, I love the summer holiday, aside from being asked for an ice cream every 32 seconds.

• 2:05Speaker 04

  Wow, Rob, that is why it's an ideal time to get them a free Monzo Kids account. Help build confidence and independence with their money. You can instantly send money or set up regular pocket money and parents still have full visibility and control from their own Monzo app.

• 2:19Speaker 03

  Unlike the requests for ice creams from the kids.

• 2:21Speaker 04

  Monzo's award-winning kids account. Search Monzo for children aged six to 15. Parent or guardian account needed first. UK residents only. Ts and Cs apply.

• 2:34Speaker 03

  Hello, you're listening to Parenting Hell with...

• 2:36Speaker 01

  Ralph, can you see Rob Beckett? V- back it. Teddy, can you see Josh Widdicombe? Josh Widdicombe. Good job. Give yourself a clap.

• 2:51Speaker 01

  And a splash in the bath.

• 2:55Speaker 03

  There we go, a little bit of extra in the end.

• 2:57Speaker 04

  A bit weird.

• 2:57Speaker 03

  Weird.

• 2:58Speaker 04

  Ted and Ralph.

• 2:59Speaker 03

  It's just people having fun, mate.

• 3:01Speaker 04

  Ted and Ralph, Rob.

• 3:02Speaker 03

  Why don't you try and have a laugh now and again?

• 3:06Speaker 04

  This is, um...

• 3:07Speaker 03

  Can you imagine being trapped in a podcast where you actually don't like each other? Because I know it's happened in the past with people.

• 3:13Speaker 04

  Oh, it's happening in the present.

• 3:15Speaker 03

  No, how dare you.

• 3:16Speaker 04

  Not us, not us.

• 3:16Speaker 03

  How dare you.

• 3:17Speaker 04

  No, not us, I mean, there's other podcasts at the moment.

• 3:20Speaker 03

  Do I know them?

• 3:20Speaker 04

  There's bound to be, isn't there?

• 3:22Speaker 03

  No, but not only for fact.

• 3:23Speaker 04

  Well, I've heard about one, but I don't think it's true.

• 3:26Speaker 03

  Can you tell me, we bleep it. Really?

• 3:29Speaker 04

  That's what I've heard.

• 3:30Speaker 03

  I, I, I can see that. Anyway, carry on. Um, yeah, popper doms or bread?

• 3:39Speaker 04

  Mike, could you cover our mouths?

• 3:40Speaker 05

  No, and I'll leave the subtitles on as well. Of course, of course.

• 3:46Speaker 03

  Could you cover our mouths now?

• 3:47Speaker 05

  Yes, I cut away to the other person.

• 3:49Speaker 03

  Right. Okay, so what I'm gonna do to mess you up, Michael, is start saying it back again immediately. So this is this constant cutting.

• 3:56Speaker 04

  I'm gonna do that thing that footballers do now.

• 3:57Speaker 03

  Oh, you're gonna do the thing footballers do, yeah. That's, yeah, that's...

• 4:00Speaker 04

  Yeah, yeah.

• 4:01Speaker 03

  Yeah, if we can't, if we can't believe this summer, who can't do it? Anyway, sorry, who was that on that?

• 4:08Speaker 04

  Ted and Ralph, which is the name of Rob, the characters from the far show, of course.

• 4:12Speaker 03

  Yes, yes, absolutely.

• 4:14Speaker 04

  Fear, my son's Teddy four and a half, Ralph two and a half, both proud members of the December Birthday Club because we clearly ignored the warning after the first one. Truly devil planning. We thought we'd make Rob's life easy with the accent this week, although knowing parenting hell, it'll somehow still end up in a debate.

• 4:30Speaker 03

  Oh, it's too long. I'm starting to guess where they're from, aren't I? Okay.

• 4:32Speaker 04

  Newcastle. There we go. Thanks for the podcast. It's made many a chaotic bath time and double nap time tidy more bearable and of course for staying sexy and relatable. Keep on snogging. She hasn't said that.

• 4:45Speaker 03

  No, but that's what we're trying to get snogging back on the agenda. Do you want a quick, before we bring in the best of?

• 4:51Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 4:52Speaker 03

  Do you want a quick game of Imagine This?

• 4:54Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 4:55Speaker 03

  Well, people enjoy Imagine This. Someone, Andy Patterson's got a situation they want us to imagine.

• 5:00Speaker 04

  Okay.

• 5:01Speaker 03

  I'll read it out. Do you want to go first?

• 5:03Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 5:03Speaker 03

  Imagine a retired police dog looking for part-time vacancies to keep him busy.

• 5:09Speaker 04

  Great. Brilliant. Okay. He's sat in an armchair with like a cup of tea. And he's, but he's sat like a human and he's got a pair of glasses on the end of his nose and he's reading the paper.

• 5:24Speaker 03

  Looking for vacancies. Okay.

• 5:26Speaker 04

  Looking for vacancies. It's a great Imagine This.

• 5:30Speaker 05

  Mine is so close to Josh's. So mine was a Basset Hound sat in a lazy boy armchair.

• 5:35Speaker 03

  Nice.

• 5:35Speaker 05

  He's reading, he's reading a big newspaper, like an old church vacancy section. And he's got a pair of glasses perched on the end of his nose.

• 5:42Speaker 04

  Yeah, perfect.

• 5:43Speaker 03

  Well, what does did you have, Josh? What did you have?

• 5:47Speaker 04

  I don't think it was a Basset Hound. It was just a generic dog. So I don't know enough about dogs that it was just a generic kind of medium to large sized dog.

• 5:56Speaker 03

  Right. Okay. Yeah. Cause well, mine actually very differently. Mine's like a German Shepherd. Yeah, mine's a German shepherd, but he's sort of got what is like a Chief Wiggum Police shirt on with his badge that's sort of a bit faded. And he's sort of like, not running, but sort of jogging. Wasn't a dog's jog? But around the perimeter of a fence and he can sort of see the proper younger dogs in there working. He's sort of running, sort of like, oh, I'm here if you need a hand. And he's just around the edge of a, yeah, that's what I had anyway. Mine's a bit more of an active, um, looking for vacancies, but, um, anyway.

• 6:32Speaker 04

  Well, lovely game.

• 6:34Speaker 03

  Lovely game.

• 6:37Speaker 04

  I've imagined this.

• 6:39Speaker 03

  Do you know what we need? We need to be sponsored by an AI company so they can draw that for us as we sail it live.

• 6:46Speaker 03

  In the meantime though, here is the best of. Enjoy.

• 6:52Speaker 03

  Charlie Baker, welcome to Parenting Now. You've been on before, yeah?

• 6:55Speaker 06

  I've been on before.

• 6:56Speaker 03

  On Zoom.

• 6:57Speaker 06

  Haven't you? There was a, there was a.

• 6:59Speaker 03

  Well, do you know what's weird?

• 7:00Speaker 06

  What percentage you putting on your confidence there?

• 7:02Speaker 03

  I was 95% sure, but because now we're doing it in person, my body goes, you've not done this before because it's just the first time you've seen Charlie in this chair. But obviously would have seen you on Zoom during lockdown.

• 7:12Speaker 06

  And I know your body has a very strong reaction to me, Rob.

• 7:15Speaker 03

  I am, I am, I'm an energy guy and I feed off you. You're a radiator. Some people are drainers.

• 7:21Speaker 04

  That's true.

• 7:22Speaker 03

  Depends how much sleep you've had.

• 7:24Speaker 06

  I don't think you're a, no, I don't think Josh is a drain.

• 7:25Speaker 03

  I'm joking. He's energy.

• 7:26Speaker 06

  Because he's kind. Yes.

• 7:29Speaker 04

  Charlie hasn't had much sleep.

• 7:31Speaker 06

  I've had a snooze.

• 7:33Speaker 04

  So where did you have a snooze?

• 7:34Speaker 06

  I did, I did a very early show this morning.

• 7:36Speaker 04

  Talk to me about this.

• 7:37Speaker 06

  Five till 6.30, picked up at three.

• 7:39Speaker 03

  Oh my gosh.

• 7:40Speaker 06

  And I did five till 6.30.

• 7:41Speaker 04

  On Virgin?

• 7:42Speaker 03

  You spent, so you got picked up at three?

• 7:45Speaker 06

  Picked up at three.

• 7:46Speaker 04

  That feels like early, feels too early, the car.

• 7:48Speaker 06

  I'm not, look, first of all, problems, first of all, problems, I'm not gonna, uh.

• 7:52Speaker 03

  You got picked up?

• 7:53Speaker 06

  I got picked up. Exactly.

• 7:54Speaker 03

  And you see, you live out of Oxfordshire way?

• 7:56Speaker 06

  No, no, I'm staying in London with my friend.

• 7:58Speaker 04

  What? And you got picked up at three?

• 8:00Speaker 06

  Don't look.

• 8:02Speaker 03

  You're in a spare room in someone's house.

• 8:03Speaker 06

  Spare room in someone's house.

• 8:04Speaker 03

  Yeah, but that's meant you can't, you can't stand someone's house and get picked up at three.

• 8:08Speaker 06

  But also getting to sleep.

• 8:10Speaker 04

  Do not knock when you're waiting outside. Can you imagine if your driver knocked and woke up the house?

• 8:16Speaker 06

  They call it caddy dreams. I don't know if you know that. You're, you're getting into golf, Rob.

• 8:20Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 8:21Speaker 06

  Caddy dreams. Caddies never get proper sleep, but when on, when it's a tournament weekend.

• 8:26Speaker 03

  Why?

• 8:26Speaker 04

  Why?

• 8:27Speaker 06

  Because they're, they have to get to the course, set it up for their, for their goal.

• 8:31Speaker 03

  Right.

• 8:32Speaker 06

  So they're just sort of like in and out of, so I'm like, I am gonna sleep through this alarm.

• 8:37Speaker 04

  Yeah, so it's the fear. Yeah, I had it the other night when I did the Dermot O'Leary show.

• 8:42Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 8:43Speaker 04

  And I had to get there at seven for eight, which I thought was reasonable.

• 8:46Speaker 03

  Come on.

• 8:47Speaker 06

  He's three for five.

• 8:48Speaker 04

  So he's three for five.

• 8:49Speaker 06

  Anyway, finished by half six. Pretty good.

• 8:52Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 8:52Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 8:52Speaker 06

  So I went home, went home, went to sleep.

• 8:55Speaker 04

  So why don't they just get you all at four?

• 8:56Speaker 06

  Don't say that, Josh.

• 8:58Speaker 04

  Hello, Virgin Radio. I think he'd be happy to do four.

• 9:00Speaker 06

  I'm only doing it for a week. It's not my show. I'm sitting in for someone, so. But I've had a snooze and I am an excellent snoozer.

• 9:07Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 9:07Speaker 03

  So I wanted, I, I, since being a dad, my napping ability has gone through the roof. Well, I can sleep anywhere at any time.

• 9:14Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 9:14Speaker 06

  That's because you're content, Rob.

• 9:15Speaker 03

  Is that what it is?

• 9:16Speaker 06

  It's because you're content. You've.

• 9:17Speaker 04

  Is it?

• 9:18Speaker 06

  It's the, the sleeping, the sleep of the just.

• 9:22Speaker 03

  You sleep, you sleep well on trains, don't you, Josh? And you love a train.

• 9:26Speaker 04

  So the other day I did the Dermot show and I got on the train at half ten to go back to, and I, I was on a table. Did I tell you this?

• 9:35Speaker 03

  Yeah, you told me, yeah.

• 9:35Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 9:36Speaker 03

  So feel free to tell Charlie as well.

• 9:37Speaker 04

  Put on my puffer jacket, did it up, did the hood. So it was nice and snug, out like absolute effing light.

• 9:44Speaker 06

  Do you know what? Spotted. I'd have loved to have had a photo.

• 9:46Speaker 04

  He's not even spotted because I'm basically looking someone in the eye, putting my puffer jacket on.

• 9:51Speaker 03

  Kenny from South Park.

• 9:53Speaker 06

  Someone killed Josh.

• 9:54Speaker 03

  What nap have you had then? You got, you went back to your friends at?

• 9:57Speaker 06

  You went back to my friends, but, but I'm, what I'm good at is there's a green room.

• 10:00Speaker 03

  Were they out? Were they out? Were they still asleep?

• 10:03Speaker 06

  No, I actually got back and they were leaving. Who's my friend?

• 10:08Speaker 04

  Like, how'd you decide? Did you, did you?

• 10:11Speaker 06

  I'm godfather to their children.

• 10:13Speaker 04

  Oh, right. So it's tip to tat.

• 10:14Speaker 06

  I've known them my whole life.

• 10:15Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 10:15Speaker 03

  Right. And you said, look, I'm in town doing this, can I stay?

• 10:18Speaker 06

  I'm not great at staying at people's houses. I don't, I don't like it.

• 10:21Speaker 04

  I would hate that.

• 10:22Speaker 06

  I'd rather.

• 10:23Speaker 03

  Well, to be fair, you're not, you're, you're, you're not sleeping for three hours before you leave.

• 10:27Speaker 04

  What time are you going to bed?

• 10:29Speaker 06

  Nine o'clock and then.

• 10:33Speaker 06

  And then I'm lying, just lying, I'm just lying there for two hours.

• 10:36Speaker 04

  Yeah, of course.

• 10:38Speaker 06

  Pretending of not asleep, still not asleep.

• 10:41Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 10:41Speaker 06

  Oh, good. Here, here come the thoughts.

• 10:47Speaker 03

  I could nap, but I can't sleep with the thoughts coming when I sleep. But when I nap, there's thoughts out there.

• 10:51Speaker 06

  So I've got two, two techniques. Have you heard of brown noise, which I know.

• 10:55Speaker 04

  Yeah, yeah, I do brown noise.

• 10:56Speaker 06

  Brown noise, right. So that's why you like trains, because that's brown noise.

• 10:58Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 10:59Speaker 06

  But this is the technique I learned, which is the best technique. If you need, this, this is from doing a matinee and an evening performance and having like an hour between.

• 11:10Speaker 04

  Do this with your eleven, two eights or whatever.

• 11:13Speaker 03

  Yeah, my, my, yeah, I, I nap between shows.

• 11:15Speaker 06

  Have a cup of coffee before you nap. Set the alarm for forty five minutes.

• 11:21Speaker 04

  Are you mental?

• 11:22Speaker 06

  No.

• 11:23Speaker 03

  So is it not kicked in yet?

• 11:24Speaker 06

  It doesn't kick in. Takes forty five minutes to kick in.

• 11:27Speaker 03

  No.

• 11:27Speaker 04

  No, it doesn't.

• 11:28Speaker 06

  So you wake up, always, also, if you're having a snooze.

• 11:31Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 11:31Speaker 06

  Set an alarm. Don't just let it drift.

• 11:34Speaker 04

  Yeah, of course.

• 11:34Speaker 03

  So forty five minutes max?

• 11:35Speaker 06

  Forty five minutes max. And then.

• 11:39Speaker 03

  You're in.

• 11:39Speaker 04

  Have a cup of coffee and go to bed.

• 11:41Speaker 06

  And then have your sleep and it will kick in and oof, when you wake up.

• 11:45Speaker 03

  Well, he's off caffeine.

• 11:46Speaker 06

  Oh, God. Well, isn't he off?

• 11:47Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 11:48Speaker 04

  Exactly.

• 11:49Speaker 03

  What do you do? What's, what are you on?

• 11:50Speaker 04

  I, do you know what I'm on?

• 11:52Speaker 06

  Heroin.

• 11:52Speaker 03

  Try life. He's on heroin.

• 11:53Speaker 04

  I'm on life.

• 11:54Speaker 03

  Big puffer jacket.

• 11:55Speaker 06

  That's what he's doing in his puffer jacket.

• 11:57Speaker 03

  You're on life.

• 11:58Speaker 06

  You're on life. High on life, Josh.

• 11:59Speaker 04

  High on life.

• 12:00Speaker 06

  That's nice. High on Devon.

• 12:02Speaker 04

  High on Devon.

• 12:02Speaker 03

  Devon life, you're, because you're.

• 12:03Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. My manner.

• 12:05Speaker 04

  Your manner, you're one of the few people who I know who grew up in Devon, who's in the entertainment industry.

• 12:11Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 12:11Speaker 04

  It's me, you.

• 12:12Speaker 03

  Jethro.

• 12:13Speaker 04

  Jethro's Cornwall.

• 12:14Speaker 06

  Cornish.

• 12:15Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 12:15Speaker 03

  Dawn French.

• 12:16Speaker 06

  Dawn French, Cornish. Oh, no, she's born in Plymouth.

• 12:18Speaker 04

  She's born in Plymouth.

• 12:21Speaker 04

  Ollie Watkins.

• 12:22Speaker 06

  Ollie Watkins, um, one, there's one of, uh, Chris, one of S Club Seven, Chris Martin. Chris Martin from Exeter, no?

• 12:29Speaker 04

  Yeah, well, kind of, but not really.

• 12:31Speaker 06

  Muse, Muse, Muse, Muse, as they call them.

• 12:35Speaker 04

  Muse, but they're very, I very rarely meet up with Matt Bellamy and talk about Devon sadly.

• 12:40Speaker 06

  When, uh, Timothée was washing away the other week. Yeah. Timothée, Timothée is a little sort of seaside town in the south Devon where Muse are from.

• 12:47Speaker 04

  Right.

• 12:48Speaker 06

  And, uh, when those storms were around the other day.

• 12:50Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 12:51Speaker 06

  The, some of the pier was washed away and it's like quite a sad thing, you know? All the Facebook groups were, can't Muse get involved?

• 13:01Speaker 06

  They haven't had a song out in 10 years, have they?

• 13:05Speaker 06

  Someone get Muse on the phone.

• 13:10Speaker 06

  There you go, I nearly said Josh Widdicombe.

• 13:12Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 13:13Speaker 06

  He, he's from round here and he's local now.

• 13:15Speaker 04

  Why don't you pay for the?

• 13:16Speaker 06

  You could have paid for the new pier, Josh.

• 13:18Speaker 04

  Because I've got a mortgage.

• 13:19Speaker 06

  Yeah, exactly. Exactly. But you're in Exeter, which is nice.

• 13:22Speaker 04

  I'm in Exeter. So would you ever move your family back?

• 13:25Speaker 06

  You've asked me this and we've just.

• 13:26Speaker 04

  But now we're alike.

• 13:27Speaker 06

  Yeah, well, your kids, you've got a 10 year old and a 17 year old. It's difficult, isn't it? Because, uh, I would, but I've got to work.

• 13:34Speaker 04

  Oh, so you would go back there?

• 13:36Speaker 06

  I would, yeah. My parents are still there. My family is still there.

• 13:39Speaker 04

  Well, your wife would go there?

• 13:40Speaker 06

  Um, my wife's sister's there and her husband.

• 13:42Speaker 04

  Okay.

• 13:43Speaker 06

  But everyone's there. Are we always disgusted?

• 13:46Speaker 04

  Yeah, because obviously where you live down is great for work because you're having to stay, you're making it up. He seemed incredibly excited to be near his wife's sister.

• 13:53Speaker 06

  Yeah, that, that was probably, I'd say that was the headline at the lot.

• 13:55Speaker 04

  Yeah, my wife's sister's there, so I wouldn't mind going back.

• 13:59Speaker 06

  Well, she, she listens to this podcast, actually.

• 14:02Speaker 04

  Oh, that's what it was then.

• 14:03Speaker 06

  So, uh, you know, shouting her out there.

• 14:05Speaker 04

  Oh, yeah.

• 14:05Speaker 06

  And she, is she a good sister-in-law? Very nice sister-in-law, yeah. Very good to be. Oh, she is. Very nice. Very nice.

• 14:13Speaker 03

  So you've got, so let's remind everyone of your kids. You've got a boy who's seventeen?

• 14:18Speaker 06

  Eighteen.

• 14:19Speaker 03

  Eighteen and your daughter's ten.

• 14:20Speaker 06

  My daughter's ten, yeah, yeah. I don't know how old they were in the last podcast. It's interesting, isn't it? Anyway, eighteen's interesting.

• 14:25Speaker 03

  Probably five years ago.

• 14:26Speaker 04

  So eighteen.

• 14:28Speaker 03

  Bigger than you.

• 14:28Speaker 04

  Is he presumably still lives with you?

• 14:30Speaker 06

  He's still, he will do as long as he wants. As long as he wants to live with us, he can live with us.

• 14:34Speaker 04

  Well, this is the thing, it's a very different world to the one we lived in, isn't it? In that children just can't financially afford to leave.

• 14:40Speaker 06

  No, but I don't expect, I mean, I left at eighteen.

• 14:43Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 14:43Speaker 06

  To move to London and probably shouldn't have, looking back at it.

• 14:48Speaker 03

  So was you studying?

• 14:49Speaker 06

  I went to drama school, yeah.

• 14:51Speaker 03

  God.

• 14:51Speaker 06

  First night I got to London, I had my bike, which I'd had since I was fourteen. First night, nicked.

• 14:57Speaker 04

  Oh, Charlie. And you cycled to London, haven't you?

• 15:01Speaker 06

  I know, all that way.

• 15:03Speaker 06

  And I rang my dad and went, my dad, my bike's been nicked. Well, that's a lesson learned.

• 15:10Speaker 06

  Hard knocks, you know, lesson learned. You've got straw in your ears, haven't you? That's what it was.

• 15:15Speaker 03

  Is that what they would say?

• 15:16Speaker 04

  So where had you left your bike?

• 15:18Speaker 06

  Oh, I lived in.

• 15:20Speaker 04

  Just on the side in Trafalgar Square.

• 15:23Speaker 06

  Just outside Buckingham Palace.

• 15:26Speaker 03

  Only not on the Lion Fountain.

• 15:30Speaker 04

  I often had them two swords, I'll pick it up in a few hours.

• 15:33Speaker 06

  In London, Houses of Parliament.

• 15:34Speaker 03

  So would you not have locked your bike up then?

• 15:36Speaker 06

  I think I did, but those wise guys, Rob.

• 15:38Speaker 04

  This will blow your mind, Rob.

• 15:39Speaker 06

  Those London wise guys.

• 15:41Speaker 04

  We, when I was growing up, we didn't have, and this, so you know how isolated where I lived was?

• 15:48Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 15:49Speaker 04

  We didn't have a key to our house.

• 15:52Speaker 03

  I think you said you just walk in and out.

• 15:54Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 15:54Speaker 03

  So how does he know how isolated your house is?

• 15:57Speaker 04

  Well, he knows where I'm from.

• 15:58Speaker 06

  I know where he's from.

• 15:58Speaker 03

  What's it like where he's from? Are they like?

• 16:00Speaker 06

  And Josh's a lot more rural than I think.

• 16:02Speaker 03

  Are they simple folk?

• 16:03Speaker 04

  No.

• 16:04Speaker 06

  No, no, no. Of course, clever, you can tell he's clever.

• 16:06Speaker 03

  Yeah, but he got out.

• 16:07Speaker 06

  I know, well, that's the, but this now, now, so this is the thing, this is the thing. No, but this is the thing I'll discuss with you actually, Josh, about moving back.

• 16:14Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 16:14Speaker 06

  Here's a reason that part of me is fighting moving back.

• 16:18Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 16:19Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 16:20Speaker 06

  I feel like a massive failure.

• 16:23Speaker 04

  Well, I think, I think.

• 16:24Speaker 06

  You feel like a failure. No, no, I don't, I don't feel like a failure.

• 16:26Speaker 04

  I think, I think you feel like that everywhere, Charlie.

• 16:28Speaker 06

  But I, I think I spent my whole childhood going, I've got to get out of here. Right, going back, you failed. I'm getting out of here.

• 16:34Speaker 04

  Yeah, I did that. I was.

• 16:36Speaker 06

  I am leaving this.

• 16:37Speaker 04

  Yeah, exactly, yeah.

• 16:39Speaker 06

  These knuckle-dragging farming twats. I'm not, I didn't say that. So, not that, not that, sorry.

• 16:44Speaker 04

  Bear in mind, your last tour, you had a pasty on the mic stand, Charlie.

• 16:47Speaker 06

  Well, exactly, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 16:48Speaker 04

  You haven't renounced it for a life of, you know, metropolitan elites.

• 16:53Speaker 06

  But that's what it is, is the thing of returning. And then you just walk in that local pub and they go, here he is. Yeah, but also, I had some.

• 16:59Speaker 04

  Wow, wow, wow.

• 17:03Speaker 06

  The great actor's return. Oh, not doing the acting no more, no. How'd you get on up London? Forty years later, thirty years later. Thirty years later. Because I thought you'd moved up London. Up London, up London's such an out-of-town thing to say. See, I'd get, because I'm from London, I just, but it's such, you know, if you leave your hometown to go somewhere, to do something, you can't go back unless you feel like, I don't know.

• 17:26Speaker 04

  No, I don't know. I think.

• 17:28Speaker 06

  How do you feel? Well, he's slightly over-clench-fist.

• 17:33Speaker 06

  I haven't failed. I've won awards.

• 17:36Speaker 04

  I think it's a sign of mellowing. It's a sign of going.

• 17:39Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 17:40Speaker 04

  What am I trying to prove?

• 17:41Speaker 06

  But that worries me as well, right? Because I'm about to turn fifty.

• 17:44Speaker 04

  No.

• 17:45Speaker 06

  And, and like.

• 17:46Speaker 04

  You look great for it.

• 17:46Speaker 06

  And it's like. The hair. The, the, well, I look like I've been to Turkey and I haven't. It's great, the hairline's outrageous for fifty.

• 17:54Speaker 04

  So, your worry is going back?

• 17:56Speaker 06

  Well, yeah, and it's that thing of.

• 17:58Speaker 04

  I think also your kids are of an age.

• 18:00Speaker 06

  If I'm mellowing, am I, I tell you what it is, it feels like, am I giving up? Yes, if you're tired of London, you're tired of life. Well.

• 18:07Speaker 04

  He doesn't even live in London.

• 18:08Speaker 06

  I don't even live in London. Okay, you're tired of, of, of beautiful Oxfordshire village, you're tired of. If you're tired of that, what do you want?

• 18:14Speaker 04

  Isn't Boris Johnson in your village?

• 18:15Speaker 06

  Uh, he's in the village next, next door, yeah. Do you see him much? I never see him. My wife sees him, she's boring.

• 18:24Speaker 04

  No wonder you're moving on to the sister.

• 18:26Speaker 06

  Apparently, when he, apparently, I'm not, apparently, apparently. Horrible runner for Charlie.

• 18:33Speaker 06

  And she really, she listens to this?

• 18:36Speaker 04

  Little old Francis doesn't listen.

• 18:38Speaker 06

  A little bit of fun for us is going to haunt him for the next six years. Rest of my life.

• 18:44Speaker 06

  Brother-in-law's, give me a cup of tea, looking me in the eye.

• 18:50Speaker 04

  And now you've got teenagers.

• 18:56Speaker 01

  Yes, so they're fifteen and eighteen now.

• 18:58Speaker 04

  And does that feel like you're kind of almost, is it quite chilled?

• 19:03Speaker 01

  It's, for me, yes. I mean, everyone has different experiences. I am a big fan of the teenage years.

• 19:09Speaker 04

  Are you?

• 19:10Speaker 01

  Because I hear a lot of people complaining about it and, and sometimes I'm sure with really good reason. But I feel like people are quite negative about the teen years and I sort of think as a parent, I'd quite like to be a champion of them. Like there are definitely, uh, you know, big difficult things about being a parent of teenagers. You get like adult-sized problems that your children are dealing with for the first time and that's quite hard, you know, when your kids are sort of muddy puddles ages. Like something goes wrong, you can kind of manage it for them and then obviously at these ages, that starts to change.

• 19:40Speaker 04

  I'm still at the age where I think I can fix everything, but you just can't do that with a teenager.

• 19:43Speaker 01

  You can't, you know, and, and your role becomes, you become more of like a supporting actor than like a main protagonist. Do you know what I mean? Um, so that's definitely like a tricky transition, but I'm such a big fan of the teenage years. I love it. It's, I mean, apart from the fact that like, it's just so exciting, you know, seeing all of these firsts, like the, you know, what, who your kids are going to be. You get a real sense of them as grownups, the way you hang out together, you know, the things that they love. You can kind of share the stuff that they're into with you. Like, uh, my eldest came up to me last night and he was like, "Mum, have you ever heard Goldfraps' Felt Mountain?" And I was like, "Yeah, yeah, I have." And he's like, "Good album, good album."

• 20:27Speaker 04

  Because they've got all music at their fingertips because of...

• 20:30Speaker 01

  Yeah, they know, that's the weird thing. It's like kids know all music. So the other week I was playing, we had a playlist of my husband's on and, uh, my god, my goddaughter, who's around our house a lot, my best friend's daughter, she was like, "Is this Depeche Mode?"

• 20:49Speaker 01

  And my fifteen-year-old went, "Yeah, yeah, it's, uh, it's Enjoy the Silence" or whatever it was. You know, like they, they know.

• 20:55Speaker 03

  Well, it's great for, the algorithm for music is great because if you go, I quite like this song, it will literally bring you up ten other songs that are like that from the last sixty years.

• 21:02Speaker 01

  And they just know everything. So my, my eighteen-year-old, he's really into like everything from hip-hop to, you know, alternative indie. But he's got like a three-hour, like Stan Getz, Bossa Nova playlist, do you know what I mean? It's three hours long. I, I couldn't make a three hour. From bossing over playlists, he's from bossing over to drum and bass, they know all of it.

• 21:22Speaker 03

  Because back in the day, if you like music, say you're into like heavy metal, you'd have to go, it'd be like your older brother might have a mate at school who was into heavy metal.

• 21:31Speaker 01

  The gatekeeper.

• 21:32Speaker 03

  Yeah, and you'd go and speak to them and they'd have like five songs or an album, but now you can just, the whole internet's there to access it, it's incredible.

• 21:38Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 21:39Speaker 03

  Do you think he's gonna make some like incredible artists in the next twenty years?

• 21:42Speaker 01

  Well, I mean, I think it is, you know, and a serious point, I do think that's why, you know, we look at like the breakdown of genres. Uh, it's sort of starting, I think in the mid noughties, you can see an artist like Amy Winehouse.

• 21:52Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 21:52Speaker 01

  To me, she's the, she represents like the beginning of that sort of digital culture where all the reference points exist in perpetuity on the internet. So she's got this kind of Shangri-La sound, but she's got a very kind of colloquial, modern way of, of writing her lyrics. And then this kind of soulful voice, so all these different kind of non-contemporary influences coming together. And that's sort of what modern music is, you know, modern pop music is very literate in all those things.

• 22:19Speaker 04

  Do you know what? That's the best point we've ever had made on it. I'm gonna pass that off as my own.

• 22:24Speaker 01

  Please do, take it, it's yours, yeah.

• 22:25Speaker 03

  Wasn't it my, my, I sort of, my perception of it though, wasn't it?

• 22:30Speaker 04

  You two have come up with it and I'm gonna use it.

• 22:33Speaker 01

  Swoop in.

• 22:34Speaker 04

  Yeah, swoop in.

• 22:35Speaker 01

  The humble jog.

• 22:37Speaker 04

  If you could just chip that bit out, Michael.

• 22:40Speaker 04

  My wife said, when I said that you were on this, she said, oh, she said something I loved, Lauren Laverne. She said that when she had kids, uh, it was great because she stopped trying to be cool.

• 22:53Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah, very much so. I mean, it's humbling, isn't it? This is obviously every parent knows this. It's just a massive kind of exercise in ego death.

• 23:02Speaker 01

  I think for me it was good. I was relatively young when I had kids, so I had my first son at, I guess, twenty eight, twenty nine. And then, uh, my second one was thirty, thirty one.

• 23:13Speaker 04

  We're of that generation where that's considered like young.

• 23:16Speaker 01

  Yeah, well, the funny thing was, I remember after I had my first son, there was only me and my best friend had kids at the same time. Nobody else that I knew had kids, nobody else had sort of got to that point yet really. And, um, I went out with my auntie and she came down to London to see the baby. Uh, my auntie Jean and my mom, my mom was already there. And we all went out to a cafe and I remember my auntie Jean going, the good thing is, pet, you're an older mother.

• 23:43Speaker 01

  And I promise you, I felt. Like I was about like fifteen and this baby girl like, what am I gonna do with this baby like, you know, just felt so out of my depth. But she was like, oh, twenty nine, you know, practically a grandma kind of thing. So it's funny that.

• 23:59Speaker 04

  How was it being like down south though, in a sort of industry where being a mum at that age and taking time off and, you know, people's bodies were so under the microscope that whole time and being away for your family, how was it stressful, was it worrying?

• 24:13Speaker 01

  Well, also, this is twenty years ago now, right? So it was a very different time. So, I mean, I got, I think, four weeks maternity leave with my first son.

• 24:20Speaker 04

  God, what were you doing?

• 24:21Speaker 01

  I was doing a TV show and while I was off, I was getting texts from people on the TV show going, oh, such and such is after your job and.

• 24:29Speaker 04

  Oh, my gosh.

• 24:31Speaker 01

  Yeah, to scare me into coming back.

• 24:33Speaker 04

  Oh, my god.

• 24:34Speaker 01

  So, you know, it was a different industry back then.

• 24:37Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 24:37Speaker 01

  Um, I mean, luckily I was always able to work part time, which really helped. But, you know, when I had my kids, I really had no expectation that I would be able to continue to have a career. I was doing more, I was doing radio on TV at that point. Um, and I just sort of thought, oh, well, this probably I'm gonna have to go to university when they're old enough. I thought my husband would keep working. And then, and because we were both working in telly, he was working in production and, um, and then weirdly, it just over the next couple of years, we had another baby and then actually as my second, I was about to have that second baby, it just all went whoosh. And things in my career started to take off and the maths just changed, you know, suddenly it was one of those things where,

• 25:19Speaker 01

  actually, if I go out to work for the afternoon, part time, it's more sensible if I do that and, and you are here with the kids. So then we're sort of switched.

• 25:28Speaker 04

  Because was TV, because I, obviously, I'm, I'm originally aware of you as a pop star, love.

• 25:34Speaker 01

  Oh, wow, that's a stretch.

• 25:35Speaker 04

  Yeah, well, in a band. And so then I knew you in a band and then was TV a decision or did you kind of drift into it from that?

• 25:44Speaker 01

  Fell into it from being on Buzzcocks and things like that, you know, it's on those sorts of shows. And then in those days, there was so much telly, right? So this is like pre-internet. There was like hours and hours of cable telly to fill up.

• 25:56Speaker 04

  Oh, so you got put on cable.

• 25:58Speaker 01

  So there was people just going like, oh, do you want to do a bit of presenting? Because if you're funny or, you know, you look the part or whatever, they would say, oh, do you want to do a bit of presenting and? Uh. So obviously I did. It was great shoe money. Do you know what I mean? I just thought fun. Why not? And then I did some radio.

• 26:13Speaker 04

  What's that phrase? Shoe money?

• 26:15Speaker 01

  Shoe money, you know, so it's just like, yeah, just like make but a little bit of money here and there, spend it on shoes. Fine.

• 26:20Speaker 04

  Great.

• 26:21Speaker 01

  But no, so I'd I sort of fell into doing the telly and then actually got the chance to do a bit of radio and I really loved that.

• 26:27Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 26:27Speaker 01

  Uh. There was something about that that I thought, oh, this is good, because it's, I always say it's showing off in private, you know, you're you're hidden away, but you get to do, uh, because I'm not really a kind of being out the front type person. I'm actually a little bit more of an introvert, really.

• 26:42Speaker 04

  All kind of a kind of stumble and find of a.

• 26:45Speaker 01

  Yeah, really, it was. I mean, I was supposed to to go to university and and have, you know, I imagined having it, like my dad was an academic. And I thought I would, uh, I wanted to be a historian, you know, and and work at a university like he did. And I wanted to have an office that was like full of books and have music on really loud like he used to. He was a sociologist. And, uh, and actually I kind of have got that life, but like in a very roundabout way.

• 27:11Speaker 04

  Yeah, yeah.

• 27:12Speaker 01

  Via a different sort of means. I've now got my my room lots full of books and records and but I just went about it.

• 27:18Speaker 04

  But the records is the thing that's paying the money rather than the money.

• 27:20Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 27:24Speaker 03

  This episode is brought to you by Tesco Clubcard.

• 27:27Speaker 04

  Big news for thrill seekers, and I consider you one of them, Rob.

• 27:30Speaker 03

  Thank you.

• 27:31Speaker 04

  Yes, you can get a two-person day ticket to a Merlin theme park for fifty six pounds when you book using Clubcard vouchers.

• 27:39Speaker 03

  So, Josh, what are we saying? What's your, what's your favourite type of ride? You've heard a lot from me and Lou and my kids about rides. I don't get it from you. I feel like you're you're a ride curious.

• 27:50Speaker 04

  Do you know what I like, Rob? I like a big drop. I like a big drop.

• 27:54Speaker 03

  I hate the drop.

• 27:55Speaker 04

  I hate it and I love it. Do you know what I mean?

• 27:58Speaker 03

  It makes my stomach go.

• 27:59Speaker 04

  That's the fun of it, Rob. That's the fun of it.

• 28:01Speaker 03

  Go, I, no, I can't do the drop.

• 28:02Speaker 04

  Like, and I sit down and I class myself in and I'm scared and I hate it and I don't want to go on it. And as soon as I've gone on it, I never want to go on it again. But for that moment when I'm falling, I think this is the best thing that's ever happened. Either that, Rob, or a pie. Pirate ship, I do love a pirate ship.

• 28:17Speaker 03

  What, the swinging one?

• 28:19Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 28:19Speaker 03

  No, you love drops. You love that little feeling in your belly, don't you?

• 28:23Speaker 04

  Oh, I love the little tickle in my belly.

• 28:25Speaker 03

  Little drop dude.

• 28:26Speaker 04

  Rob, if that's got you in the mood, right, you can get two tickets to a Merlin theme park for £56 when you book using Clubcard vouchers. You can book at Alton Towers, Thorpe Park, Chessington and Legoland Windsor Resort.

• 28:38Speaker 03

  You need to exchange with reward partners, but you can exchange as little as £50 to £1 and then pay the difference and still be eligible.

• 28:45Speaker 04

  Book between the 30th of June and the 20th of July for any bookable date until the 1st of September 2026.

• 28:53Speaker 03

  Terms and conditions apply. Book now so you don't miss out. Visit tesco.com/latestfromclubcard.

• 28:59Speaker 01

  Did you know that psoriatic arthritis may progress over time and could cause permanent joint damage if left untreated?

• 29:10Speaker 01

  Listen to what it sounds like to be a million miles away.

• 29:18Speaker 01

  Trimfyia gusalkumab, taken by injection, is a prescription medicine for adults with active psoriatic arthritis. Serious allergic reactions, increased risk of infections or lower ability to fight them, and liver problems may occur. Before treatment, get checked for infections and tuberculosis. Tell your doctor if you have an infection, flu-like symptoms, or need a vaccine.

• 29:43Speaker 01

  Imagine being a million miles away. Explore the possibilities. Ask your doctor about Trimfyia. Tap this ad to see new joint data and learn more about Trimfyia, including important safety information.

• 30:00Speaker 01

  Pink Pantheress here. Coach and Spotify are teaming up to bring music and style together, and they want you to be part of it. Grab your friends and head to the Tabby Tour, hitting cities around the country with live performances from special artists, exclusive experiences, and personalised products. And discover custom playlists on Spotify, booked just for you based on who you are and how you listen. Live your story with Coach. Learn more at coach.com.

• 30:28Speaker 02

  This episode is brought to you by State Farm. Football has a play for just about everything. You can go deep, keep it on the ground, or draw up something nobody sees coming. And whether you want to run a flea flicker or the tush push, you need a plan to fit your unique situation. That's why State Farm takes the time to get to know you, so they can help personalize coverage for your life and budget. Now that's a solid game plan. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there.

• 30:59Speaker 03

  Tom, welcome back to the podcast. We've had you on before, but it was on Zoom and it was a little bit more of a heavier one. We spoke a lot about your surrogacy journey.

• 31:06Speaker 04

  Let's see how heavy it gets.

• 31:07Speaker 03

  We don't have to go heavy again. We may go heavy again.

• 31:09Speaker 04

  Do you want to apologize to Ramesh publicly?

• 31:10Speaker 06

  Yeah, I did feel bad because I sort of announced the surrogacy story here.

• 31:14Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 31:14Speaker 06

  And to be fair, that's how I chose to announce it to the world. Obviously, at the time I was on a tour as well, I needed to sell some tickets.

• 31:22Speaker 04

  Turn it back on tour.

• 31:25Speaker 06

  Yeah, I'm back here again. But, you know, it was a heavy one. It was actually an incredible thing, I've got to say, doing this. And the amount of people still now who reach out about that journey, which is, you know, kind of, I guess, why you do these and you talk about, and I've got to give you both your flowers because you are so beautiful.

• 31:42Speaker 03

  And the tour, the tour's the other reason you do it, isn't it?

• 31:44Speaker 06

  Yeah, I mean, yeah, the tour is.

• 31:46Speaker 03

  Your new tour, Spud Gun, which is the reason you're here. Especially you love us and, you know.

• 31:49Speaker 06

  And my daughter.

• 31:50Speaker 04

  Do you know what, Tom? We'll give you the options. You can discuss the importance of surrogacy or your tour today.

• 31:56Speaker 06

  No, I'm not going to definitely talk about the tour. I'll chat about the surrogacy and...

• 32:02Speaker 03

  Or just your daughter in general, or the tour.

• 32:04Speaker 06

  Weirdly, my daughter now basically is the tour.

• 32:08Speaker 03

  How old is she?

• 32:09Speaker 06

  Four.

• 32:09Speaker 03

  Why is it called Spud Gun?

• 32:11Speaker 06

  That was a nickname given to me on building sites.

• 32:13Speaker 03

  Oh, you were called After Bottom?

• 32:15Speaker 06

  Yeah, I think it was, yeah, After Bottom.

• 32:17Speaker 03

  Because there was that character in Spud Gun.

• 32:18Speaker 06

  Yeah, who was a bit of a, you know, I suppose he was the idiot of the group in a sense, right? Spud Gun.

• 32:23Speaker 03

  Big sort of lumbering loser, yeah. Oh, yeah.

• 32:28Speaker 03

  He goes, one potato or two. Remember that? No.

• 32:32Speaker 06

  I love how you sort of said it in such a sort of big lumbering mood.

• 32:38Speaker 06

  And I know you, Rob.

• 32:39Speaker 03

  You're joining the dots.

• 32:40Speaker 06

  I know you well enough, Rob, to know that you've described me that way at some point.

• 32:43Speaker 03

  Well, no, never. You're not. A very funny man, good friend, good guy.

• 32:48Speaker 06

  No, but I thought it was that. And then someone told me it was actually because they thought it's what you called a younger man who didn't feel like he had, like, he wouldn't shoot sperm, he'd shoot, like, watery.

• 32:59Speaker 03

  Oh, right. And they were right?

• 33:01Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 33:06Speaker 06

  I'll tell you that. I'll tell you that. I have literally, I talk so much about this very subject in the new tour.

• 33:11Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 33:12Speaker 06

  Thank you for the segue in.

• 33:13Speaker 03

  So is that what the tour's about then? That linked between that?

• 33:16Speaker 06

  No, no, it's more about, it's about, the tour's about.

• 33:19Speaker 03

  The link between that? I'm just trying to get it back on track, like.

• 33:22Speaker 06

  Um, yeah, but it's about, the tour's about perception. But a lot of the tour, you know, you've both got kids, I think. It's almost, you can't help but a lot of the material linking back to having children. They just, every day, there's something that you get with them that

• 33:35Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 33:36Speaker 06

  becomes your material. And they do funnier stuff than, and she's a, I mean.

• 33:41Speaker 03

  How old is she now?

• 33:41Speaker 06

  Four.

• 33:42Speaker 03

  Four. So is she the year before school?

• 33:44Speaker 06

  Yeah, she's just, yeah, yeah. Yeah, she's in a little nursery.

• 33:47Speaker 03

  How are you feeling about school?

• 33:49Speaker 06

  Uh, I mean, she's, she's very much like I was in a lot of ways and we've, yeah.

• 33:54Speaker 03

  Seven foot?

• 33:55Speaker 06

  Yeah, she's, no, she's six foot three at the moment.

• 33:57Speaker 03

  But, you know, when do you get to eighteen? We'll see.

• 34:00Speaker 06

  She's, um, no, she's, she's, her attention's, but I mean, she's four, but there's an element of like, you know, she's, she's a little comedian. She's very funny. She, she takes a piss and she does a joke. She's just learned the word fanny.

• 34:12Speaker 03

  Yeah. American or British?

• 34:14Speaker 06

  I mean, she watches a lot of Kardashians. We've got.

• 34:17Speaker 03

  All right, okay.

• 34:18Speaker 06

  I'm like, you know, the football dads. I'm looking at the Kardashians like sort of, Project Kim.

• 34:22Speaker 03

  Project Kim and get her out doing makeup tutorials.

• 34:25Speaker 06

  That's the future, right?

• 34:26Speaker 03

  Influencing.

• 34:27Speaker 06

  She's got a phone now.

• 34:28Speaker 03

  The thing is, everyone's an influencer now. So who are we influencing each, the other influencer?

• 34:32Speaker 06

  Yeah, but the thing is, we all influence each other so, in such small ways.

• 34:35Speaker 03

  Oh, God, that was, that was really fucking deep.

• 34:39Speaker 06

  You influenced me some, that I'd get influenced. I watched your goal, you're now in the golf.

• 34:42Speaker 03

  Oh, I'm a golf influencer now, yeah. I've done two videos.

• 34:47Speaker 06

  That's the thing I've. About being a dad now, you see, I very idea of going out for four hours.

• 34:52Speaker 03

  Yeah, but yeah, but you're, I couldn't, I wanted to do it when my kids were your age, but now they're eight and 10 and and the tour's calming down. I've got time because they're both in school.

• 35:01Speaker 04

  Do it weekdays when your kids.

• 35:02Speaker 03

  My plan is to be able to go like, drop the kids at school on a Monday and then go to the golf course straight after school drop and then pick them up and that'd be my day off.

• 35:09Speaker 06

  You're basically a retired footballer now.

• 35:11Speaker 03

  Yeah, that's that's been that that, when was that, what do you want to be when you're older? Not even a footballer, a retired footballer. That's the best job.

• 35:17Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, that is the best, yeah.

• 35:18Speaker 03

  So that's what I'm trying to do.

• 35:19Speaker 04

  How many days a week you gonna do? Because didn't, you know Jamie Redden out well, he does loads to.

• 35:23Speaker 06

  Yeah, I don't think as much since he's done his knees, but what I love about you as well, because you could be like retired footballer, but it's not like. Like Stuart Ripley, like he won the Premier League, but people were sort of like, do you know what I mean? You're not.

• 35:33Speaker 03

  Yeah, I wouldn't be that go down as a sort of Wayne Rooney type. I've got time now to both in school, but when when yours goes to school full time, you'll have so much time back.

• 35:42Speaker 04

  Pulling up at the school, golf bag in the back of your car.

• 35:46Speaker 03

  Yeah, chuck them out, straight to the course, high five a few of the guys. Um, probably receive some quite questionable political and racial views. Try and block that out and just.

• 35:59Speaker 04

  No, no, honestly, I'm not filming for Sky, I won't be bringing him down, so you have to say.

• 36:03Speaker 03

  Yeah, it's okay, it's just me.

• 36:06Speaker 06

  It is bizarre when you go into those places.

• 36:08Speaker 03

  Yeah, there is an old time, a weird world of golf, that them old, old parts of men.

• 36:14Speaker 04

  And have a beer at the 19th.

• 36:16Speaker 03

  Is that, do they call that?

• 36:19Speaker 03

  I'm struggling with the golf banter.

• 36:21Speaker 06

  Yeah, it's the.

• 36:23Speaker 04

  On, on, on paper, I'd say if you asked me to describe the people that would most annoy you, it would be. Rich men on a golf course.

• 36:33Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 36:33Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, I found.

• 36:35Speaker 03

  Which, you know, I am now.

• 36:37Speaker 06

  Do you know the word?

• 36:40Speaker 03

  Let's not, let's be honest about this. I fall in that right category.

• 36:43Speaker 06

  You know what's bizarre though is when they start having banter about, like, because we all have this thing where the, yeah, and what the very nature of what we do for a living. People jump through like the process of what they think they know you. So if you you met just any other guy down there, you you'd slowly get to know him.

• 36:59Speaker 06

  What I noticed with playing golf is that people. Will have banter straight away.

• 37:02Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 37:03Speaker 06

  So as soon as you hit a ball badly, there's no like, you know, oh yeah, wait for them to, they're literally firing to you.

• 37:09Speaker 03

  Straight in and then walk up and watch your putt.

• 37:11Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 37:12Speaker 03

  Can I tell you, so I had two bits of.

• 37:13Speaker 04

  Aren't you meant to have the hold yourself?

• 37:15Speaker 03

  Can I tell you that the two interactions I had, right? So it was guys on another hole. Okay. So Tom, what's it like being a dad?

• 37:25Speaker 06

  What I love is I listen to this podcast and it's so thinly veiled.

• 37:32Speaker 03

  It's like nature, you can see through.

• 37:33Speaker 05

  I listen to it as a place to get advice and I've actually texted both of you, I think, I've certainly texted Beckett for advice as being a father. But when I listen to.

• 37:41Speaker 04

  Interesting you've listened to me and never thought.

• 37:44Speaker 03

  Normally they ask me about holidays. I've had holidays.

• 37:48Speaker 06

  I've asked you about holidays, yeah. But um, but now it was like, it was very like, oh, these two are in, I think, like a cinema situation that I'm in now. So I probably should go back and listen to it, but I listened to the more regular ones. I'm like, okay, yeah, this is the bit I'm looking forward to. I could skip through the first two Lord of the Ring movies and just get to the end where they'll sail away on the boat.

• 38:08Speaker 04

  Well, tell us your two golfing.

• 38:10Speaker 03

  Well, one, I was putting and a guy literally walked away from his hole to come to my hole to watch me putt.

• 38:14Speaker 04

  And is that with, without sounding like a wanker because you're Rob Beck?

• 38:18Speaker 03

  Yeah, that's more, that's not golfing. That's because he's recognised.

• 38:20Speaker 06

  It's actually really frowned upon.

• 38:22Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 38:23Speaker 06

  To do that.

• 38:23Speaker 03

  You just let people, you should just let people get on with it.

• 38:25Speaker 04

  It's like standing in someone's view when they're pot, uh, pot, potting in snooker.

• 38:29Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, it's exactly that.

• 38:30Speaker 03

  So anyway, he's quite a nice guy. Then come up to me and he was like, are you getting on? I went, uh, three under. I was on hole two.

• 38:35Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 38:36Speaker 03

  And he was like, oh, you're doing well in winter. I was like, no, I'm joking. I went, I'm, I'm not doing very well actually. I was like, five, seven, six, nine, 10. He's, ah, sounds like a phone number. Well, it doesn't, does it? Because they start with zeros.

• 38:47Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah.

• 38:48Speaker 03

  And then.

• 38:50Speaker 04

  You wouldn't say 10, you'd say 1-0.

• 38:52Speaker 03

  And then this is quite, I've never had this before. This guy come up to me, I'd hit a ball so off the hole, like onto the other hole, other hole. And so I'm able to go onto their fairway and I'm, oh, sorry. And he's like, no worries. He comes over to me and says hello. He's a nice guy. I was like, oh, hello, Rob. I'm introducing that you should just let someone have their shot and be quiet. This man comes up to me, I've already got a man behind me waiting to tee off, I'm with someone, so I'm, I'm like, and I'm, I've hit it about three times shittily off the tee. So it's gone right over there. So I'm trying to do it quickly. He's like, oh, hello, nice to meet you. I'm so and so. And I was like, all right. He went, I'm fascinated by my work I do. I went, oh, right. Good for you.

• 39:26Speaker 06

  By his work.

• 39:27Speaker 03

  By his work, not mine, his work. Okay.

• 39:28Speaker 04

  That's the weirdest thing anyone's ever said.

• 39:30Speaker 03

  Then he goes, I specialize in high performance in sport and life.

• 39:35Speaker 03

  And it's very hard to say you don't need that when you're already on someone else's hull.

• 39:38Speaker 04

  Yeah, yeah.

• 39:41Speaker 03

  I'm looking for mid-level performance, actually.

• 39:44Speaker 06

  Also, he he's who he's not hoovering up shit golf. He's got to be looking at top, top people. He's not going.

• 39:49Speaker 03

  Well, I don't know, but like, anyway, so he was like, I I specialize in helping people achieve high performance in this and all that. And then he said, would you be interested in that? And by this point, it's raining, I'm stressed. And I went, no.

• 40:01Speaker 06

  It is, I've couldn't tell you now, there's a lot of that. And I would say that people, the thing about.

• 40:06Speaker 04

  But it's good that you're getting to relax in your working day, Rob.

• 40:10Speaker 03

  The busiest man in showbiz is fucking turning on me because he's tired.

• 40:13Speaker 06

  I think there's a sort of.

• 40:15Speaker 03

  Can I tell Tom about your last week?

• 40:17Speaker 04

  Say, you're gonna love this.

• 40:18Speaker 03

  Go on.

• 40:19Speaker 04

  I saw Ramesh on Saturday.

• 40:21Speaker 03

  When you was doing Radio Two?

• 40:22Speaker 04

  When we were both working, yeah. And we were like, the subject of UK came up.

• 40:26Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 40:27Speaker 04

  Uh, oh god, he's doing a golf thing now. He just keeps going, doesn't he? Does so much.

• 40:31Speaker 03

  These two said at Radio Two, sucking from the corporate tea. I'm a little in from a little creator out there, fucking earning his shift. So, you're parenting?

• 40:40Speaker 06

  I am, I'm actually parenting now. I'm in the, since I last came on here, yeah, I, yeah.

• 40:46Speaker 03

  He's like, oh, what's your baby, what's your little baby, wasn't she?

• 40:48Speaker 06

  Really young.

• 40:49Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 40:49Speaker 06

  Yeah, really young. And I remember at the end of it, sort of saying, I'll never be a situation where I sort of look at her and sort of push laughs. Or sort of curse curse her not sleeping. And yeah, that lasted all of like about six months.

• 41:01Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 41:02Speaker 06

  Because it's crazy now, like we've we've had in and out of bed, we've been like, I mean, in our bed and.

• 41:07Speaker 03

  We were all, we all, me and Josh both have slight sleeping issues with the kids at points. It's hard. Are you all in the same bed at the moment then?

• 41:13Speaker 06

  No, no, no, she's back in her room now, but we.

• 41:15Speaker 03

  All night?

• 41:16Speaker 06

  Yeah, well, yeah, like we had a thing where I I was filming. At the end of last year, I'm still nicking a bit of work where I can.

• 41:23Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah.

• 41:24Speaker 06

  I'm not in your league now, boys, but I'm not.

• 41:26Speaker 03

  So what's she in her room, she's in her room?

• 41:27Speaker 06

  So she's in her room, but yeah, the end of last year, she, I was, I was away working and she sort of crept back in.

• 41:33Speaker 03

  Yeah. Yeah, that's, I think that's the problem for comedians is if there's a gap in the bed.

• 41:38Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah.

• 41:38Speaker 03

  How can you say no to your kid that comes in at night and then all of a sudden you're back off tour and there's three of you in there?

• 41:43Speaker 06

  So then she, she spent quite a lot of time, then over Christmas, we were sort of like, she was on a mattress on the floor.

• 41:48Speaker 03

  Cause you're big as well, like, so what size bed have you got? You can't say it like that. He's called Big Tom. Yeah, I know he's, well, yeah, true, you don't know what we said, it's on your socials. Cause you're big, you're big, cause you're like, what's going on there, like, and you need a special bed?

• 42:06Speaker 06

  Oh mate, I went for medical recently and the guy analysed me like I was a freak. It was so awkward. I was like literally going, um, you haven't had any problems with your heart? And I went, no, no, really? And he went, um, okay. And then he gets out like the dick to phone to leave sort of.

• 42:22Speaker 03

  Gets out the dick to phone.

• 42:24Speaker 06

  Well, this is, he's out of the dick, he goes, this isn't in keeping with the rest of your stature.

• 42:29Speaker 03

  That's odd, isn't it? That's off.

• 42:32Speaker 06

  This is a penis of a five foot two, man. It's like Josh Whittaker's penis.

• 42:39Speaker 06

  Hello, little fella.

• 42:42Speaker 06

  What a nice surprise. But he go, uh, he starts doing a thing where he goes, um, uh, worth having some heart checks, uh, um, due to the fact he has, uh, abnormal hands, uh, abnormal, uh, his head maybe is slightly on, on, uh, abnormalities with his forehead and he starts and you know what you're looking and I'm thinking, if I had small hands, I'd look fucking ridiculous.

• 43:03Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 43:04Speaker 06

  But.

• 43:04Speaker 03

  But you, I, you're not, I didn't say you're out of proportion.

• 43:07Speaker 06

  No, the way he made me feel in this situation.

• 43:08Speaker 03

  You've got quite a narrow little waist, a sexy little samba waist.

• 43:11Speaker 06

  It's got narrower and it was.

• 43:14Speaker 03

  How much have you lost?

• 43:15Speaker 06

  Uh, so going into Covid, I was about.

• 43:18Speaker 05

  I think about a hundred and forty six, hundred, two hundred and forty eight kilograms. And I'm down about a hundred and twenty two now.

• 43:24Speaker 03

  So you've lost twenty six kilos, twenty six kilos. What's that in stone, four or five stone?

• 43:30Speaker 05

  Uh, so yeah, yeah, about four or five stone, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 43:33Speaker 03

  So how did you, have you managed to do that with like a baby, having a baby and what, what's your?

• 43:37Speaker 05

  Um, I stopped drinking was a big thing, uh, eating well, um. And also, there's a big part of me which was having, having a little, a baby at that young. Sort of what was she, so I was forty two. I wanted to be as sort of like around as.

• 43:52Speaker 03

  So you was forty two inches tall?

• 43:53Speaker 05

  Yeah, so but I also wanted to be able to do, you know, run about and, you know, and, and. So, and I was in a position where I just thought I'm, I'm, I'm not able to do that, so.

• 44:02Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 44:03Speaker 05

  And so I prioritised just, even now, I sort of like. Getting as many steps as you can, I know that you're, you have a bugbear, you're getting over the steps thing.

• 44:12Speaker 03

  Do I know, I.

• 44:13Speaker 05

  No, no, I thought you did.

• 44:14Speaker 03

  It's made up though. Yeah, here he goes, don't get one of his eyes about steps. If he has it, he's got fucking badger, badgered my ears about steps over here. I'm actually in favour of steps, I think it's a good thing.

• 44:23Speaker 05

  Yeah, yeah, so I always, yeah, I think.

• 44:25Speaker 03

  I love that cover of a tragedy, am I right? Oh, yeah, you didn't believe that, did you?

• 44:29Speaker 05

  No.

• 44:30Speaker 03

  Your heart went in that.

• 44:31Speaker 05

  I just thought.

• 44:31Speaker 03

  You even gave, you tried to wiggle your glasses to give it more. Do you know what it was?

• 44:34Speaker 05

  Everyone's an audition for Strictly with this guy.

• 44:39Speaker 03

  Uh, anyway. It's, uh, it's move. It's movie's week, so let's get on with it, Tom. And here he is as Frankenstein.

• 44:51Speaker 05

  You can't do this, it's the only competition, it's the only outfit we've got for him.

• 45:01Speaker 01

  Pink Pantheress here, Coach and Spotify are teaming up to bring music and style together. And they want you to be part of it. Grab your friends and head to the Tabby Tour, hitting cities around the country with live performances from special artists. Exclusive experiences and personalised products. And discover custom playlists on Spotify, booked just for you based on who you are and how you listen. Live your story with Coach. Learn more at coach.com.

• 45:28Speaker 02

  This episode is brought to you by State Farm. Football has a play for just about everything. You can go deep, keep it on the ground, or draw up something nobody sees coming. And whether you want to run a flea flicker or the tush push, you need a plan to fit your unique situation. That's why State Farm takes the time to get to know you, so they can help personalize coverage for your life and budget. Now that's a solid game plan. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there.

• 45:57Speaker 02

  Visible puts the ultimate wireless hack in the palm of your hand. With unlimited 5G wireless data and hotspot, designed to keep you connected. Powered by Verizon's 5G network. And, no contract holding you back.

• 46:12Speaker 04

  Plans start at $25 a month, or get the premium Visible Plus Pro Plan and save $10 on your first month when you use promo code HACK. Make the switch at visible.com. Terms apply. See visible.com for details.

• 46:29Speaker 04

  Hello. How old are your kids?

• 46:32Speaker 01

  They are seven and four.

• 46:34Speaker 03

  Well, first of all, Chantel Nash, welcome to the podcast. We should do a proper.

• 46:37Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 46:38Speaker 03

  It's because you know each other so well.

• 46:39Speaker 04

  Well, not so well, but...

• 46:40Speaker 03

  It's our first time.

• 46:41Speaker 04

  It's your first time.

• 46:42Speaker 01

  Yes. Hello. Thank you very much. I'm Chantel Nash. Hello.

• 46:47Speaker 03

  And you know Josh from doing his tour support?

• 46:48Speaker 01

  I do know Josh from doing tour support. A couple of dates in the Home Counties region.

• 46:53Speaker 04

  We've done quite a few. I reckon we've done 15.

• 46:55Speaker 01

  Do you reckon? Is it that many?

• 46:57Speaker 04

  Feels like it.

• 46:58Speaker 01

  Okay. Thanks, thanks, Josh.

• 47:00Speaker 03

  He's really good at making our guests feel at ease.

• 47:02Speaker 01

  So, so comfortable, so welcome. But no, we have, that's where...

• 47:05Speaker 04

  We did that really hot one in Bedford.

• 47:06Speaker 01

  Yeah, there was that hot one in Bedford.

• 47:09Speaker 04

  It was boiling. Absolutely boiling.

• 47:13Speaker 01

  Yeah, they were hot. If I'm honest.

• 47:15Speaker 04

  And they put Karen from Strictly in the front row.

• 47:18Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah. That was, that was a good one. Yeah, that was a good one, because I met Karen from Strictly. So, thank you very much for being my gateway, my gateway drug to Karen, which was very nice.

• 47:28Speaker 03

  Gateway drug to Karen is gin and 60 years of age.

• 47:34Speaker 01

  But yes, I am so tell, I've got two kids, they're six, no, seven, seven and four. And so my daughter called Etta is seven and my son Otis is four. And Etta turned seven in January, so fresh seven.

• 47:45Speaker 03

  Oh wow.

• 47:46Speaker 01

  Yeah, and my son's birthday is in October.

• 47:48Speaker 03

  And he's starting school in September?

• 47:49Speaker 01

  Starting school in September, desperate to get to school already. He's been at nursery for like two years, cause it's like a school nursery. And there are days where he will like, you, to get to the school, you kind of turn right for nursery, turn left for reception. And there are days where he'll like break free from my grip and run to the reception door and just try to break into the classroom. It's like, cause all of his friends from the year before have already got up to reception. So he's like trying screaming his friend's name, like, let me in!

• 48:13Speaker 03

  This is gonna be the least stressful first day at school for him.

• 48:16Speaker 01

  The least stressful transition. The most stressful thing will be if he doesn't get into the school.

• 48:20Speaker 03

  Oh god, no mate.

• 48:22Speaker 04

  You said something beforehand, which we've never covered before, which is your children do child modelling.

• 48:28Speaker 01

  Yes, they, they do.

• 48:29Speaker 04

  So how did that happen?

• 48:30Speaker 01

  So that happened with my daughter.

• 48:32Speaker 04

  Is it like, cause Kate Moss was like walking along the tube, wasn't she? And someone said, you've got to become a model.

• 48:37Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 48:38Speaker 03

  It's hard to be a talent spot for children models, isn't it?

• 48:40Speaker 01

  Creepy, very creepy.

• 48:43Speaker 03

  Just trying to get that body odor, the long hair, the look.

• 48:47Speaker 01

  Somebody once actually at a train station, I saw my phone and they came over and was like, oh, excuse me, do you know anyone who would do modelling? Or would you do modelling? And I looked up and it was like, or if you've got any friends who would like to? Like, it was like, took one look at me, was like, no, actually. If you've got, if you've got mates, I was like, okay, thanks. So yes, my kids do child modelling. So basically my daughter was born and obviously like anyone else, you think your child is the most beautiful thing in the world. Because you're, as a woman particularly, you're genetically, hormonally hardwired to think that because, because really if there's anything else in the world that caused you the amount of pain that a child does, you'd kill it on sight.

• 49:26Speaker 03

  Yeah, exactly, yeah.

• 49:27Speaker 01

  You would, but no, it's like, oh, it's so beautiful. So basically my partner Richie was like, she's a really cute, she's a really cute baby, she's a really cute baby. I was like, yeah, of course she's cute. And he did kid modelling when he was little.

• 49:37Speaker 04

  I've not seen Richie, is he fit, is he dynasty?

• 49:40Speaker 01

  Oh, I think he's lovely, but you know.

• 49:43Speaker 01

  I have a type. But he was basically, when he was a kid, he was the face of the, um, I don't know if I can say this actually. It's that the cream egg McFlurry when it launched.

• 49:51Speaker 04

  You can say that.

• 49:52Speaker 01

  Yeah, I don't know, you might have to pay McDonald's ten million.

• 49:56Speaker 03

  I'm gonna Google the cream egg McFlurry lunch.

• 49:58Speaker 01

  Yeah, you might be able to find it. So I've got like a four foot bus poster of him aged thirteen in our house. And it's gonna be, it'll be going up. So he was like, you know, I did modelling, they could do modelling. And so we reached out to the child model agent that he was with. And they were still in business at the time. Um, and they were like, sent her a picture, a picture of her. And they're like, yeah, we'll take her on, you know, it's, you know.

• 50:20Speaker 04

  No, just get off there, no.

• 50:21Speaker 01

  No, it's like, yeah, we'll have another one to the, another one to add to the castle. Um, because the main criteria for being a baby model is just being a baby. That's it.

• 50:28Speaker 04

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. So it was a baby model?

• 50:31Speaker 01

  She was, she was three months.

• 50:32Speaker 04

  She was three months?

• 50:33Speaker 01

  Three months, yeah. She did loads of stuff. She does stuff, she did stuff for Boots. She was in a Centre Parks advert. She's got, she got a TV credit before me.

• 50:41Speaker 01

  That is the truth.

• 50:42Speaker 03

  And does she still do it or is it just as a baby?

• 50:45Speaker 01

  So she, she does it, her model agency, they, um, they decided to retire. So we need to find her a new, a new agent. If anyone would like to.

• 50:54Speaker 04

  What's it like when your child, what's the day like?

• 50:58Speaker 01

  The day, when like when you've got, you know, self tapes come in and the weird thing is.

• 51:03Speaker 04

  Self tapes?

• 51:03Speaker 01

  Yeah, for, for kids. The weird thing is.

• 51:05Speaker 04

  For babies?

• 51:06Speaker 01

  Yeah, so you have to like.

• 51:07Speaker 03

  You've got to rename that mum tape or dad tape. You can't call it self tape.

• 51:11Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's self tape.

• 51:11Speaker 03

  She's three up the old.

• 51:13Speaker 01

  But you've got the baby on your lap and you've got to say, this is, you know, so and so there. And actually in baby modelling, it's not obviously about your, your measurements and your size. It's length. We, we're looking for babies that are between fifty five and a hundred and six centimetres long.

• 51:26Speaker 04

  No, not that big a distance, surely.

• 51:29Speaker 01

  No, well, sorry, that's, that's mental. That's me, it's me and my.

• 51:32Speaker 04

  Fifty five to a hundred and six.

• 51:33Speaker 01

  Enormous children. Honey, I stroke the baby.

• 51:37Speaker 03

  You've got to be able to get one.

• 51:38Speaker 01

  Exactly. Sorry, that's not right at all. But yeah. Yeah, so baby's that big, um, as what we're looking for.

• 51:43Speaker 04

  And so you'd say, you'd self tape them?

• 51:45Speaker 01

  Yeah, so you'd have them on your lap and you'd say, this is Etta, she's X age, she's this length. And then a close to the face or one of the hands, whatever they want. And then sometimes it would be like a picture or a video of them doing something. So there was ones where it was like for a food advert. So you've got to show videos of your kids eating ice cream messily or something like that. Um, and then there are other ridiculous ones that were like, if your child can say X thing at six months, you're like, no, most kids can't do that. But the thing with Richie was, he was like, he's always had en- enormous faith in our kids. And so he, he's a mumager, he's the Kris Jenner. People think it's me, it's not me.

• 52:20Speaker 03

  Oh, he's the pusher. What does he do?

• 52:22Speaker 01

  He's an electrician.

• 52:24Speaker 03

  Right.

• 52:24Speaker 01

  Living vicariously through the kids.

• 52:25Speaker 03

  Did he want to carry a model in?

• 52:27Speaker 01

  No, he didn't. He chose, he chose to go with football. He wasn't that sore about it. But he, um, he just has immense faith in them.

• 52:32Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 52:33Speaker 01

  And so not in a pushy, like, um, insane way.

• 52:35Speaker 03

  Right, is that, you know, three months in, get me on the camera.

• 52:37Speaker 01

  Come on, get on it.

• 52:38Speaker 03

  Get self taped.

• 52:38Speaker 01

  Come on, love, get working, get grafted.

• 52:40Speaker 03

  Get those hands out, hold on, get the me, get the tape measure out.

• 52:43Speaker 01

  And it was, you'd have the tape measureer. Um, and she did a self tape for this, um, series for Sky. And they were looking for kids who could age, I think, three and up, but could look two. And she was, wasn't even two at the time. And they had like lines that she had to do, this character. And I've got the self tape of her doing these lines at like, at under two.

• 53:03Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 53:04Speaker 01

  And like Richie's feeding other lines, like doing the bits back and she's like, okay, it's this time, if you could try a little bit more, like really going into it. Ultimately, she got the job.

• 53:12Speaker 04

  No.

• 53:12Speaker 01

  Yeah, and she was, she was happy to do it because she was like, she's very girly, she's very confident and outgoing. Um, there was no point where she was like upset. Um, and she did it. So when Otis was born, uh, two weeks after he was born, she had to film. Um, this Sky TV show. So Richie went off with her for two weeks to be on set.

• 53:31Speaker 04

  Wow, what was the show?

• 53:32Speaker 01

  It was Midwich Cuckoos.

• 53:34Speaker 04

  Oh yeah, we advertised that on this.

• 53:35Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 53:36Speaker 01

  Did you?

• 53:36Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 53:37Speaker 01

  Oh no, yeah, I think.

• 53:38Speaker 03

  Full circle, they're Midwich cuckoos.

• 53:39Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 53:40Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, so she was.

• 53:41Speaker 03

  Amazing, that's amazing.

• 53:42Speaker 04

  And so, is there loads of rules when you're on set, like?

• 53:45Speaker 01

  Yeah, they can only work for a certain amount of time. So it's like an hour or forty five minutes and then the baby needs a break. So they have to be really quick.

• 53:51Speaker 03

  That's in my contract as well.

• 53:55Speaker 01

  So yeah, that's um, that's the real thing.

• 53:57Speaker 03

  What's the rules of that? Cause like, they have to have a separate bank account and does the money go into their, so the parents, so what other rules are there like than tax?

• 54:06Speaker 01

  You're never earning that much money in a year, average on child modeling, you're not making big bucks. The first thing that her agent at the time said is like, she's not gonna get cast in EastEnders, you can't quit your job.

• 54:18Speaker 01

  I wasn't thinking about that Sally, but cool. So yeah, you have to have a bank account registered in their name and any payments have to be made out to them direct. So either by cheque or direct debit to their own bank account. And so you can't have access to it. So yeah, they've had, both kids have both have bank accounts since they were tiny. With Otis, I remember.

• 54:35Speaker 03

  Did he do modeling as well?

• 54:36Speaker 01

  Yeah, he was on the books.

• 54:37Speaker 03

  Richie loves it, doesn't he?

• 54:38Speaker 01

  Yeah, I remember being, just giving birth and.

• 54:44Speaker 03

  Richie had the tape measure out.

• 54:46Speaker 01

  The, the agent messaged and was like, congratulations, like I've heard the baby's born. We have just had a request for a, for a Saudi bank and they're looking for a range of babies. Can you, they haven't cast the dad yet, could you send a pic? So literally in the hospital, I was like, there's a baby, like minutes old already on the job.

• 55:08Speaker 01

  He didn't get the job, I think they cast a different, a different colored dad.

• 55:13Speaker 03

  So how, so, cause I, cause I always, I'm fascinated by this, cause I had friends who I did acting when they were like, there's always a kid at school that does like child modeling or acting or whatever. But like the weird thing now, the way it's all changed now is where like people's kids are on Instagram or TikTok all the time. And it's, you know, fair enough, they're just filming, do something funny and it's put up just, and that's it. But some are like, you know, you see these like.

• 55:35Speaker 04

  You don't have your kids on Instagram, do you?

• 55:37Speaker 01

  No, sometimes they'll pop up on like a carousel of pictures, but yeah, literally on a carousel of things. But I'm never putting them up intentionally, like, oh, this is a.

• 55:45Speaker 03

  Yeah, well, some of the reality stars put up like, oh, thanks. And it'll say, oh, for example, something like Johnson's Bubble Bath or something. And it'll be an ad and it'll be hashtag ad, oh, thanks, brilliant, the kids love it. And the kids are just like in the bath, in the photo, like, that child's doing an advert for a bubble bath, like, and you can see him in a bath, like. So where does that, so and, and the mum's getting paid or the dad's getting paid for that. Say, you know, say they're getting five grand for that.

• 56:09Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 56:10Speaker 03

  And it's going straight to them, but they're not even in the, they're not even in it.

• 56:13Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's, it's weird. I don't, I don't know where the middle ground, because I always think that like, surely there are rules to this. Like, how do you break that down? We've, because when we were with the agency, we got stuff for family work, so we'd have to self tape as a whole family.

• 56:25Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 56:25Speaker 01

  And we did a, an advert for Witch, for like, so Rich was in one bit, I did, I had to run into the sea, it was mental. Um, anyway, and the kids.

• 56:32Speaker 03

  Is that a video?

• 56:33Speaker 01

  It's not, it might be a video actually. No, it's not a video.

• 56:36Speaker 03

  Can we find that?

• 56:37Speaker 01

  You can find the picture of it. Witch, Witch Me in a blue.

• 56:40Speaker 03

  We'll drop it in and it'll be on our Instagram. Witch Me?

• 56:44Speaker 01

  It's called, like Witch The Company. Um, it was like a summer campaign they did. It's a still, I was on the side of buses, like.

• 56:51Speaker 03

  Why?

• 56:51Speaker 01

  Yeah, it was mad. My friends were like, what is this? I was like, it was for the kids. Um, so I had to complain to go to uni, that was why. Um, but basically.

• 57:00Speaker 03

  So is it all going in like a uni fund?

• 57:02Speaker 01

  Yeah, basically, yeah. She's, she's made, she's, she's paid a couple of years off already.

• 57:06Speaker 03

  Oh, wow.

• 57:07Speaker 01

  Yeah, but she did a, a wet wipe thing that, um, okay, good. And because the buyout for like print stuff, if it gets used again, um.

• 57:15Speaker 03

  You get a bonus.

• 57:16Speaker 01

  Yeah, so every now and then we just get a little thing through from the wet wipe thing that's kind of.

• 57:19Speaker 03

  And it all just goes into her account? That's amazing.

• 57:21Speaker 01

  Into her account, yeah.

• 57:22Speaker 03

  Yeah, so they're just gobbling it up, these people on social media.

• 57:25Speaker 01

  Yeah, I don't know what's, what's happening there. I don't feel right about it personally, but I, only, um, legitimate channels.

• 57:32Speaker 03

  Absolutely. No, not questioning you not. Just saying though, as an expert in the field, you may, because I always look at them adverts and go, who's getting the money here?

• 57:39Speaker 01

  Yeah, no, but you, you have to, and for that, so for that Witch One, we, we got paid. Pink Pantheress here. Coach and Spotify are teaming up to bring music and style together, and they want you to be part of it. Grab your friends and head to the Tabby Tour, hitting cities around the country with live performances from special artists, exclusive experiences and personalised products. And discover custom playlists on Spotify, booked just for you based on who you are and how you listen. Live your story with Coach. Learn more at coach.com.

• 58:13Speaker 02

  This episode is brought to you by State Farm. Football has a play for just about everything. You can go deep, keep it on the ground, or draw up something nobody sees coming. And whether you want to run a flea flicker or the tush push, you need a plan to fit your unique situation. That's why State Farm takes the time to get to know you so they can help personalize coverage for your life and budget. Now that's a solid game plan. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there.

• 58:41Speaker 01

  A kind of an overall fee. And then we just put it in the kids' accounts.

• 58:45Speaker 03

  Oh, that's nice.

• 58:47Speaker 01

  Me, mum running into the, you know, the sea.

• 58:50Speaker 03

  Yeah, you were the one taking the bullet there. You were in a swimsuit running into the sea.

• 58:52Speaker 04

  Were you swimsuited up?

• 58:54Speaker 01

  I was swimsuited up.

• 58:55Speaker 04

  On the side of a bus?

• 58:56Speaker 01

  And I didn't know, it was like, oh.

• 58:58Speaker 04

  And the kids are getting paid.

• 58:59Speaker 01

  It's a beach family day out was the shoot. And then like the day before, they're like, how, how are you in open water? I can't swim.

• 59:07Speaker 04

  You can't swim.

• 59:07Speaker 01

  For the purpose of people listening to this audibly, I'm black. I don't swim. All right? So I can't. And they're like, oh, would you feel okay going? I was like, not really. And then on the day, they're like, so the shoot is, you're all a bunch of mum friends. You've taken to open water swimming. You're gonna run into the sea and then we're gonna run out again. You're not gonna go in just going up to, you know, chin height.

• 59:30Speaker 04

  Oh, my God.

• 59:34Speaker 01

  You're gonna run in and we were in this.

• 59:35Speaker 03

  Did you tell them you couldn't swim?

• 59:37Speaker 01

  Yeah, and they're like, you don't have to. You're just going in, you're just wading in. And it was like in, it was obviously to look like summer, but filmed in like March. In wherever it was, somewhere.

• 59:45Speaker 03

  And your kids are there with you?

• 59:47Speaker 01

  Kids are with us, they're in like, they're in the kind of a catering tent with a chaperone. Me and Richie are tag teaming in because the chaperones are a thing as well. You've got to leave your kid with somebody who's like legally qualified to watch them. And then we're in this, this van and we're all like talking with other women. And we were actually talking about quite like emotional things about like anxieties and kind of female bodies and changes and menopause and all this stuff. And it was really heartfelt conversations like, oh, you know, thanks for sharing that about, you know, your life and your struggles. There was a lady who was deaf and she had a, it was a really lovely moment. And then the door flies open, it's like, hello ladies, my name's Brian. I'm from the R and L and I'm gonna talk to you about riptides. Like, what? Riptides? I didn't think I was gonna like get sucked into the, you know, North Sea or wherever it was.

• 1:00:29Speaker 01

  But anyway, Google it, you'll find me on the internet.

• 1:00:35Speaker 04

  That's it for this episode of Parenting How. (Music)