When all else fails...

More adventures in parenting and beyond with Rob and Josh... This ep it's a bit of inbox correspondence from the listeners and some of the best bits from our guests this series while we take a short break. Back very soon with series 13!!! 1. Ray Bradshaw 2. Jessica Hynes 3. Jaime Laing 4. Michelle Wolf Listen and / or watch the full episodes on Spotify. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Parenting Hell⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ is a Spotify Podcast, new video episodes available everywhere every Tuesday and Friday. Please subscribe and leave a rating and review you filthy street dogs... xxx If you want to get in touch with the show with any correspondence, kids intro audio clips, small business shout outs, and more.... here's how: EMAIL: [email protected] Follow us on instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@parentinghell⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ A 'Keep It Light Media' Production Sales, advertising, and general enquiries: [email protected] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

• 0:00Speaker 00

  For adults with Crohn's disease or ulcerative colitis symptoms, every choice matters.

• 0:07Speaker 00

  Tremfya offers self-injection or intravenous infusion from the start. Tremfya is administered as injections under the skin or infusions through a vein every four weeks, followed by injections under the skin every four or eight weeks. If your doctor decides that you can self-inject Tremfya, proper training is required. Tremfya is a prescription medicine used to treat adults with moderately to severely active Crohn's disease and adults with moderately to severely active ulcerative colitis, serious allergic reactions, increased risk of infections or lower ability to fight them, and liver problems may occur. Before treatment, get checked for infections and tuberculosis. Tell your doctor if you have an infection, flu-like symptoms, or need a vaccine. Explore what's possible. Ask your doctor about Tremfya today.

• 0:52Speaker 00

  Call 1-800-526-7736 to learn more, or visit tremfyaradio.com.

• 1:01Speaker 01

  Parenting unlocks some pretty impressive skills, like carrying grocery bags, a soccer ball, and a sleepy kid all at once. Good thing the newly designed Chrysler Pacifica has a few tricks of its own: hands-free power sliding doors and liftgate, rear seat entertainment, and stow-and-go seating and storage that adapts faster than your family's weekend plans. Visit Chrysler.com to learn more. Chrysler is a registered trademark of FCAUS LLC.

• 1:31Speaker 02

  Hey Spotify listeners! When you travel with American Airlines, you'll enjoy comfort and convenience at every altitude. Before takeoff, unwind in the Admirals Club Lounge with curated self-serve offerings of hearty bites and refreshments. In flight, stay connected with high-speed Wi-Fi, sponsored by AT&T. Your journey is designed to feel easy from the moment you check in to the moment you arrive. No matter where you're going, American gets you there. Book now at AA.com.

• 1:56Speaker 03

  This episode is presented by Monzo. Josh, I love the summer holiday, aside from being asked for an ice cream every 32 seconds.

• 2:04Speaker 04

  Wow, Rob, that is why it's an ideal time to get them a free Monzo Kids account. Help build confidence and independence with their money. You can instantly send money or set up regular pocket money and parents still have full visibility and control from their own Monzo app.

• 2:18Speaker 03

  Unlike the requests for ice creams from the kids.

• 2:20Speaker 04

  Monzo's award-winning kids account. Search Monzo for children aged six to 15. Parent or guardian account needed first. UK residents only. Ts and Cs apply.

• 2:33Speaker 03

  Hello, you're listening to Parenting Hell with...

• 2:35Speaker 05

  Us, can you say Josh Weddington? That's Weddigan! And Rob Beckett. Rob Beckett! Violet, can you say Josh Weddington? Josh Weddington. And Rob Beckett. Rob Beckett. Well done!

• 2:50Speaker 04

  There we go. G'day. Rob and Josh and Michael. This is our 31-month-old Harris, not Harrison or Harry, and five-year-old Violet, giving your names a red-hot go. Lovely. Thank you for keeping me in my seat on the rollercoaster ride that is parenting. Stay forever sexy and relatable. Great email, really well written. Love from down under. Amie. Amy? A-M-I-E.

• 3:18Speaker 03

  Amy!

• 3:20Speaker 04

  Amy. 416 months, Hawkesbury Valley, Australia.

• 3:26Speaker 03

  Hawkesbury Valley, Australia.

• 3:27Speaker 04

  On his autocue has "G'day". Why wouldn't he? I suppose that's what he says at the start of last leg.

• 3:34Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 3:34Speaker 04

  But it always, yeah. Always find that.

• 3:37Speaker 03

  That's how they spell it.

• 3:38Speaker 04

  He's written "G'day". Well, it's always weird, isn't it? The amount of things on an autocue that you would say anyway, obviously.

• 3:45Speaker 03

  G'day. Well, no, you may not say "G'day". Hello!

• 3:49Speaker 03

  We say hello, welcome to the show. You're right.

• 3:52Speaker 04

  Yeah, I'm fine.

• 3:54Speaker 03

  Right. Do you want the longest, shortest time between wake up and leaving the house?

• 3:58Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 4:00Speaker 03

  Here we go. In last week's episode, you asked for the longest time between wake up and leaving the house. My five year old son has never slept past 5.30 and is currently on a run of four, 4.30 AM wake ups. Our school drop off window, yeah, our school drop off window is 8.45 to 8.55 and we are a five minute walk away.

• 4:21Speaker 04

  Oh, no, that is bad. That is bad.

• 4:24Speaker 03

  This means at the moment, he has four hours to fill every morning.

• 4:29Speaker 04

  Fucking Nora alive.

• 4:32Speaker 03

  Help.

• 4:33Speaker 04

  Fucking hell, that's insane.

• 4:36Speaker 03

  That's a, that's a whole day every morning of like entertaining a five year old.

• 4:41Speaker 04

  Oh my word.

• 4:43Speaker 03

  Four hours. That's awful.

• 4:45Speaker 04

  Four hours. So what's yours? Mine's, mine is an hour. Bang on really.

• 4:51Speaker 03

  Ours is about an hour, hour and 15.

• 4:54Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 4:55Speaker 03

  Well, up at half six, six forty five and then leave about seven, you know. So it depends if they've got different clubs. Yeah, it depends on what time we leave, depends on what time the clubs are, but it's about an hour, hour and 15.

• 5:07Speaker 04

  Yeah. Yeah. That's great. If you can beat that. And also we are looking for shortest as well. We do like shortest. But Rob.

• 5:17Speaker 03

  Yeah, the shortest is hardcore. Should we do the compilation or do you want a bit longer, Michael? That was quick.

• 5:22Speaker 04

  No, he wants the compilation. He wants the compilation.

• 5:25Speaker 03

  He wants the compilation. Let's give it to the comp. Let's give it. Enjoy.

• 5:28Speaker 04

  Here it is.

• 5:29Speaker 03

  We'll be back soon.

• 5:34Speaker 06

  My wee boy is frighteningly clever. Like he's got a, we think, well, his teachers and we think he's got a photographic memory. So he is really confident and.

• 5:43Speaker 04

  So what does that mean that he's got a photographic memory?

• 5:46Speaker 06

  From the age of four, if you show him any country, just a shape, he'll name it.

• 5:50Speaker 04

  Whoa.

• 5:51Speaker 06

  So like, I've ever.

• 5:53Speaker 04

  And did part of you go, what the fuck is going on here?

• 5:56Speaker 06

  Kinda, yeah. And like, he remembers everything. So he was slagging me off the other day because I didn't know how to spell Kurdistan. We do worldo, so it's like.

• 6:06Speaker 04

  Worldo?

• 6:07Speaker 06

  No, worldo, so it's a country shape every day. And so you get six guesses to go.

• 6:11Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 6:11Speaker 06

  So like, it comes up. So the first one we ever did, I put it, I put it on a story online because it came up and he was like Gabon. And I was like, it's four, right? And I go, how do you know that? He was like, oh, because that's the gap for Equatorial Guinea. And I was like, what the fuck? You used to eat coal out of the fireplace. What is happening? And yeah, so he remembers things all the time.

• 6:32Speaker 04

  So tell me what's going on there then?

• 6:34Speaker 06

  So I think he watches a lot of YouTube. I love that question. Yeah, such a loaded question, isn't it?

• 6:39Speaker 04

  No, but like, I just like, what does that mean?

• 6:43Speaker 06

  So he, like, he was reading a poem for school because it's coming up when we record this, it's coming up for Burns Day. And if he reads it a couple of times, he just remembers it.

• 6:50Speaker 04

  He's got it.

• 6:51Speaker 06

  Yeah, and like, he now, he's really into football now, so he's memorizing old footballers. He, so we do worldo. The weirdest one we did, right?

• 7:01Speaker 04

  And has he got other things that he's really good at? Or is it literally like he's just got this one thing?

• 7:05Speaker 06

  He can read really well. It's stuff he's seen. And like, we were, so it was been first of April last year. So my, my brother lives in America. He was back with his wife and their son. And we were doing worldo. Alex likes to show off. He's like, look what I can do because he realised, I remember.

• 7:21Speaker 04

  He's got your DNA.

• 7:21Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah. We're in, we're in a pub and the guy next to us, our local pub, the guy was like, oh, I'm really good at geography as well because we were playing like a cards geography game. And Alex went, okay. And the guy went, oh, we'll have a flag competition. And the first flag came up and my wee boy went, Esbatini. And then the guy was like, yeah, we'll leave it there.

• 7:41Speaker 06

  But yeah, so it was the first of April. He was like, worldo came up and he was like, that's weird. That's the Roman Empire. And I was like, no, no, it's countries.

• 7:48Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 7:48Speaker 06

  And he was like, no, that's the Roman Empire. And then we clicked it in and it was like, April fails, you got us. That was the Roman Empire. And all of us in the room were like, we need to monetise this somehow.

• 7:58Speaker 04

  That is incredible, yeah.

• 8:00Speaker 06

  He's taking a fake, it's not a bad joke.

• 8:02Speaker 04

  And so what do his teachers say about stuff like that? Like, does it make it so easy for them?

• 8:06Speaker 06

  He's pretty quick at like reading and maths and stuff like that just now, yeah, but.

• 8:10Speaker 04

  Were you good at school?

• 8:11Speaker 06

  I was all right, but nothing.

• 8:12Speaker 04

  Your family, they be the. Missing something or they've got something extra. Every story you tell, someone's got a different.

• 8:20Speaker 06

  Maybe it's like, what's that Smallville, where everyone's got like a superpower, we don't know it yet. And I was just kind of, you don't, again, you don't realise how weird your family are until you speak it out loud.

• 8:28Speaker 04

  And so is he, does that help him with sign language then?

• 8:31Speaker 06

  Little bit. A, a sign language is kind of similar with anything that the less you do it, the harder it gets. So if he doesn't see my mum and dad for a bit, they say, because you know what kids are like, he's got football, he's got all that kind of stuff. So swimming, so he needs to kind of go see them and do it. And he would always come back, like when he was younger from mum and dad's with maybe three or four signs from that day. And he would remember them all and then.

• 8:54Speaker 03

  It must be frustrating for them if he can't remember certain words to sign at them and he knows the shape of the Roman Empire. You think, are you putting your heart into this?

• 9:02Speaker 06

  Yeah, he's, he's not picked his battles there, has he? But yeah, he's.

• 9:06Speaker 03

  Very much like the Roman Empire.

• 9:07Speaker 04

  Here we go. We don't really know what that meant, no.

• 9:12Speaker 06

  It made sense though.

• 9:13Speaker 04

  Yeah. And yeah, rhythmically we like.

• 9:16Speaker 03

  Well, I think it's a different world now. I do that.

• 9:18Speaker 04

  I thought you were about to explain.

• 9:19Speaker 03

  No, no, no. I do it that way on podcasts, but on Not the Week, I would have gone, a bit like the Roman Empire.

• 9:24Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 9:24Speaker 03

  And then stare in silence and wait for applause.

• 9:26Speaker 06

  And would it come?

• 9:27Speaker 03

  Um, what's that?

• 9:28Speaker 06

  Would the applause come?

• 9:29Speaker 04

  Yeah, once Andy passes and said something.

• 9:31Speaker 03

  And you plant the seed.

• 9:32Speaker 06

  Nice, nice. Yeah, but I'm like heavily, so I gag a lot. And then the rest of the time, so like, because I've listened to other episodes of podcasts, people talk about their family life. I coached my son's football team.

• 9:45Speaker 04

  Oh, do you?

• 9:46Speaker 06

  Well, like occasionally, so it's like 10 or 11 of us and I'm away. So like it's on tonight, so I'm not there.

• 9:50Speaker 03

  Right.

• 9:51Speaker 06

  I'm not there on Saturday because, oh no, it's not on because it's still winter.

• 9:54Speaker 04

  You've got an assistant manager?

• 9:55Speaker 06

  No, one of the other coaches.

• 9:57Speaker 04

  A kind of Michael Carrick figure?

• 9:58Speaker 06

  I'm not, I'm not the top one. I'm, I'm there for like aura.

• 10:01Speaker 04

  Putting the cones out.

• 10:02Speaker 06

  I'm there to kind of big the kids up. Uh, one of the coaches, his dad was a very famous manager. So he's good for that.

• 10:09Speaker 04

  Who's the manager?

• 10:10Speaker 06

  Uh, I don't think he'll want me to say. I would say hand on heart, it's the worst hour and a half of my week, every week.

• 10:16Speaker 03

  Oh, really?

• 10:16Speaker 06

  Yeah, it's 29 kids, just running around.

• 10:19Speaker 03

  What's your son's level of ability within the squad? Because that's difficult if you're the dad.

• 10:23Speaker 06

  I'd say there's 29 players.

• 10:25Speaker 04

  It's too big a squad. Pep Guardiola talks about stuff like that, doesn't he?

• 10:28Speaker 06

  Yeah, we just put a bid in for Mark Gueye, so hopefully we're gonna go. He's, I'd say he's between 10 and 20 in them. So he's not, he's not the best, he's okay. Loves a celebration. Loves a celebration.

• 10:39Speaker 04

  Remembers all the other players' names.

• 10:40Speaker 06

  Does that when he scores. He remembers, he's pretty good at that. And then...

• 10:44Speaker 04

  Knows all the kits.

• 10:46Speaker 06

  I was in Rome.

• 10:48Speaker 03

  Many corner flags.

• 10:50Speaker 06

  At the weekend, and he was like, "You need to get me a Dybala Roma top." And he was like, "If you can't get that, you can get Totti." And I was like, "Okay, fuck it."

• 10:58Speaker 03

  Yeah, well, as soon as I get home, I'll go on the Chinese website and you'll have it in a week to ten days.

• 11:01Speaker 06

  I did buy him a fake one because the Roma shop was 95 euros, so that's not happening.

• 11:05Speaker 03

  You'll have an eight pound one, it gives you a bit of a rash.

• 11:08Speaker 04

  And is it, are the parents as awful as you imagine?

• 11:11Speaker 06

  Sometimes, yeah. There was one, it was awful. One of the first few games I was at with Alex, and one of the dads for the other teams was shouting behind the goal, just shouting constantly. And it was relatively constructive to his kid, but also his kid is five. Like, chill the fuck out. And then, in my head, I was like, "This guy's a dick, this guy's a dick." And then the minute full time finished, he came up and went, "I've seen you on tour, I'm a really big fan." And I was like, "This guy's class, man." So quick, how I changed.

• 11:37Speaker 04

  Can I ask, because you've got two daughters.

• 11:39Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 11:39Speaker 04

  Who aren't like, one of your daughters is into football, don't you play?

• 11:43Speaker 03

  Yeah, so she's ten, she's ten, but she plays at school, for the school, and she's...

• 11:48Speaker 04

  Do you go?

• 11:49Speaker 03

  I've been a couple of times, yeah. It's very hard not to.

• 11:52Speaker 04

  Because I can't imagine you keeping your counsel on a touchline.

• 11:55Speaker 06

  Oh, really?

• 11:56Speaker 03

  No, do you know what? I thought, yeah, you're right, I have to work really hard because I...

• 12:00Speaker 04

  I've been on a panel show with him.

• 12:01Speaker 03

  Yeah, no, but I, I'm only ever encouraging, but even that's too much sometimes.

• 12:06Speaker 06

  Do you take flares?

• 12:06Speaker 03

  So I'm like, "Well done, well done," but that's too much.

• 12:10Speaker 04

  So you never say push up?

• 12:11Speaker 03

  No, but I might go, I want to go, "There's a bit of space." If I see space, I'll find it sold, I'll tell about it. I'll never be critical and stuff, but it's quite toxic to shout, "There's space," just let her get on with it.

• 12:22Speaker 04

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 12:23Speaker 03

  But I, I find it really difficult. I do find as well, I don't know if you get this when you're at the sport, where people will say stuff to try and make you laugh because they know you're a comedian. So it'll be like, if a kid scuffs it and it goes wide, and they're 10, I'm like, "Well done, don't worry about it," but then they'll be like, "Yeah, that was close." And I, "No, you're mugging off a kid's ear," trying to make a comedian laugh. And I, I, I, I don't, I give them nothing.

• 12:47Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 12:47Speaker 03

  Like a fucking statue. And if they are, oh, I've said before, I was like... I don't think he should say that. And it gets really awkwardness.

• 12:56Speaker 06

  Yeah. The fear of mugging off a kid just wins every time. Like you can't beat that.

• 13:00Speaker 03

  Yeah, you're mugging off, yeah, anyway.

• 13:01Speaker 04

  So have you had to confront anyone?

• 13:03Speaker 06

  Uh, yeah, two, two times. One was like, uh, just a football argument and one another team was shouting, we've got a very good player. Who'd tackled someone quite firmly and they were shouting, do him.

• 13:14Speaker 03

  Do him now.

• 13:15Speaker 06

  And I was like.

• 13:16Speaker 04

  Fucking hell.

• 13:17Speaker 06

  He's five or six. I was like, what the fuck are you doing? So, yeah, that was.

• 13:20Speaker 03

  How did you deal with it?

• 13:22Speaker 06

  I went and argued with him.

• 13:23Speaker 03

  You went around and said you can't say it.

• 13:24Speaker 06

  And it was parents at the side arguing with him and then, um, they were, I was standing in an ice cream van queue after the game and they were raging behind us. And it's really hard, like that awkwardness afterwards.

• 13:34Speaker 03

  And also I wonder, like, you can't have a row with someone old and a flake.

• 13:38Speaker 04

  99 on your nose.

• 13:40Speaker 06

  Uh, so, yeah. It's, um.

• 13:42Speaker 04

  If you were to stab someone with an ice cream, which would you choose?

• 13:46Speaker 06

  Maybe the bottom end of Cornetto straight out of the freezer.

• 13:49Speaker 03

  Absolutely spot on.

• 13:51Speaker 06

  I don't think I've ever felt, I don't think I've ever felt more Glaswegian in my life. That came from somewhere inside me.

• 13:56Speaker 04

  What about, what about getting a Calippo out and using that to slash someone?

• 14:00Speaker 06

  Like a javelin.

• 14:01Speaker 03

  I think you could batter someone to death with a frozen Calippo.

• 14:04Speaker 04

  And then eat the evidence.

• 14:05Speaker 03

  But you'd have to.

• 14:07Speaker 06

  Yeah, but you have to, the wrapper's got the.

• 14:08Speaker 04

  Oh, you'd have to eat the wrapper as well.

• 14:09Speaker 03

  No, that's what he does.

• 14:10Speaker 04

  Yeah. Do you not eat the wrapper?

• 14:12Speaker 03

  No, I don't, no, no.

• 14:13Speaker 04

  It's like the apple core.

• 14:14Speaker 03

  I'd be like the Glasgow mate, no.

• 14:16Speaker 06

  A cloofer's gonna go out you.

• 14:17Speaker 04

  I tell you the thing about a Calippo, I don't like the skin.

• 14:20Speaker 03

  Josh licks the outside until it disappears and then he gets to the fruit.

• 14:23Speaker 04

  It's worth it. When does he get in?

• 14:25Speaker 06

  Treat yourself, it's good.

• 14:26Speaker 04

  Um, do you, how much do you put winning as a thing or how much?

• 14:32Speaker 06

  None, none. I don't, a lot of time when we leave, I don't know the scores. I'll know how many Alex has scored probably. If he scores one or two, because he'll talk about it the whole way home. He was like, did you see my goal? But no, I could not, I will rotate fairly. Like, they're five or so. I used to run.

• 14:47Speaker 03

  He's so young as well, his mental.

• 14:48Speaker 06

  I used to run an amateur team for years playing football and I've played football all my life and people, some people take it seriously. That's never been, because we're not.

• 14:55Speaker 03

  That's what ruins it. I love playing football.

• 14:57Speaker 06

  You pay to play.

• 14:58Speaker 03

  But it's just, so.

• 14:59Speaker 06

  That's what I was thinking.

• 15:00Speaker 03

  Yeah. Some people just, that's what put me off Sunday league. And when I got about 17, 18, it's just like, geezer, like, just booting, you're trying to have a fight and just frustrate. It's, I played in this Marks and Spencer's father's side tournament. We played other Marks and Spencer's team. There was a geezer playing, um, and, um, he was playing football off his face, drinking a rum and coke, but it was too hard for anyone to say anything.

• 15:22Speaker 06

  And you work for him in this?

• 15:23Speaker 03

  Yeah, probably the warehouse.

• 15:26Speaker 04

  Tell us about your tour.

• 15:27Speaker 03

  Can I ask about Scotland quickly?

• 15:29Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah.

• 15:30Speaker 03

  I said the other week, I think that Scottish bakeries-

• 15:32Speaker 06

  This is a worry.

• 15:33Speaker 03

  Scottish bakeries are 10 times better than English bakeries.

• 15:37Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 15:37Speaker 03

  And I don't know why, but I think it is.

• 15:39Speaker 06

  Macaroni pies?

• 15:40Speaker 04

  What he said.

• 15:40Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 15:42Speaker 04

  And then what did you say? You said macaroni pies? What was the other one?

• 15:44Speaker 03

  Like Scotch, I think Scotch pies.

• 15:45Speaker 06

  Scotch pie, yeah, yeah.

• 15:46Speaker 03

  It's such a good meat for a pie.

• 15:48Speaker 04

  Donut thing?

• 15:50Speaker 06

  A yum yum?

• 15:50Speaker 03

  Um, not yum yum. It was like a fudge donut.

• 15:53Speaker 06

  Oh, yeah, fudge donut, yeah, yeah.

• 15:54Speaker 03

  Yeah, so it was St Andrews.

• 15:55Speaker 04

  And then what did you say 10 minutes later?

• 15:57Speaker 03

  I don't know why I'm not really fit and healthy.

• 15:59Speaker 04

  I don't know why I'm not losing weight. I'm going on runs.

• 16:02Speaker 03

  Pie and with beans and mash on top.

• 16:04Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 16:04Speaker 03

  And then, um, had a fudge donut.

• 16:06Speaker 06

  But I think the Scotch- That sounds class though.

• 16:08Speaker 03

  Yeah, but I think the meat-

• 16:09Speaker 04

  Yeah, of course. He's happy.

• 16:10Speaker 03

  Because actually, that Scotch pie mince meat is a bit like pie mash mince meat, where it's just loads of sort of mince rather than-

• 16:15Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 16:16Speaker 03

  I don't like-

• 16:16Speaker 06

  That's where you get the football. That's the go to one.

• 16:18Speaker 03

  So I don't like in a pie or anything, the big chunks of the meat, because sometimes-

• 16:23Speaker 06

  Like a steak pie, anything is not for you.

• 16:24Speaker 03

  Yeah, I think the big chunk, sometimes the meat's a bit dodged, where if it's mince, you know what you're getting.

• 16:28Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 16:28Speaker 03

  And it's smooth, it's hot, it's tasty.

• 16:30Speaker 06

  This podcast is so versatile, like it really is.

• 16:33Speaker 03

  I love-

• 16:33Speaker 06

  Going for the mince meat of a pie.

• 16:34Speaker 04

  Or we just don't have enough to talk about.

• 16:37Speaker 06

  Do you know what? So I've been listening to episodes. How do you manage to do it, by the way?

• 16:42Speaker 04

  I love that you call it versatile.

• 16:44Speaker 06

  It is.

• 16:44Speaker 04

  You've made our biggest weakness our strength.

• 16:46Speaker 03

  Well, I just, I think this couch is incredibly neuro spicy.

• 16:51Speaker 03

  We know, we know what it is, but we don't want to diagnose it because it will be too long.

• 16:54Speaker 04

  Don't lose the magic.

• 16:55Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 16:59Speaker 03

  This episode is brought to you by Tesco Clubcard.

• 17:01Speaker 04

  Big news for thrill seekers, and I consider you one of them, Rob.

• 17:05Speaker 03

  Thank you.

• 17:06Speaker 04

  Yes, you can get a two-person day ticket to a Merlin theme park for £56 when you book using Clubcard vouchers.

• 17:13Speaker 03

  So Josh, what are we saying? What's your, what's your favourite type of ride? You've heard a lot from me and Lou and my kids about rides. I don't get it from you. I feel like you're, you're a ride curious.

• 17:24Speaker 04

  Do you know what I like, Rob? I like a big drop. I like a big drop.

• 17:28Speaker 03

  I hate the drop.

• 17:29Speaker 04

  I hate it and I love it. Do you know what I mean?

• 17:32Speaker 03

  It makes my stomach go.

• 17:33Speaker 04

  That's the- Fun of it, Rob.

• 17:34Speaker 03

  No, go. No, I can't do the drop.

• 17:37Speaker 04

  And I sit down and I clasp myself in and I'm scared and I hate it and I don't want to go on it. And as soon as I've gone on it, I never want to go on it again. But for that moment when I'm falling, I think this is the best thing that's ever happened. Either that, Rob, or a pirate ship. I do love a pirate ship.

• 17:52Speaker 03

  What, the swinging one?

• 17:53Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 17:53Speaker 03

  No. You love drops. You love that little feeling in your belly, don't you?

• 17:57Speaker 04

  Oh, I love the little tickle in my belly.

• 17:59Speaker 03

  Little drop dude.

• 18:01Speaker 04

  Rob, if that's got you in the mood, right? You can get two tickets to a Merlin theme park for £56 when you book using Clubcard vouchers. You can book at Alton Towers, Thorpe Park, Chessington and Legoland Windsor Resort.

• 18:12Speaker 03

  You need to exchange with reward partners, but you can exchange as little as £50 to £1 and then pay the difference and still be eligible.

• 18:20Speaker 04

  Book between the 30th of June and the 20th of July for any bookable date until the 1st of September 2026.

• 18:27Speaker 03

  Teas and cedes apply. Book now so you don't miss out. Visit tesco.com slash latest from Clubcard.

• 18:33Speaker 01

  Did you know that psoriatic arthritis may progress over time and could cause permanent joint damage if left untreated?

• 18:44Speaker 01

  Listen to what it sounds like to be a million miles away.

• 18:53Speaker 01

  Trimfaya guselkumab, taken by injection, is a prescription medicine for adults with active psoriatic arthritis. Serious allergic reactions, increased risk of infections or lower ability to fight them and liver problems may occur. Before treatment, get checked for infections and tuberculosis. Tell your doctor if you have an infection, flu-like symptoms or need a vaccine.

• 19:17Speaker 01

  Imagine being a million miles away. Explore the possibilities. Ask your doctor about Trimfaya. Tap this ad to see new joint data and learn more about Trimfaya, including important safety information.

• 19:34Speaker 00

  Parenting unlocks some pretty impressive skills like carrying grocery bags, a soccer ball and a sleepy kid all at once. Good thing the newly designed Chrysler Pacifica has a few tricks of its own. Hands-free power sliding doors and liftgate, rear seat entertainment and stow and go seating and storage that adapts faster than your family's weekend plans. Visit Chrysler.com to learn more. Chrysler is a registered trademark of FCAUS LLC.

• 20:06Speaker 06

  Jessica Hines, welcome to the show.

• 20:08Speaker 03

  Thank you.

• 20:09Speaker 06

  It's very exciting.

• 20:10Speaker 04

  Can I start with some huge praise?

• 20:14Speaker 03

  Yes, always.

• 20:17Speaker 04

  Because it's rare that we have someone who I remember just being incredible, like when I was into comedy before I did comedy. So you being Cheryl in The Royal Family, which was the first time I really came across you, I think. Would that be?

• 20:38Speaker 03

  Well, I think that was kind of almost simultaneous.

• 20:41Speaker 04

  With space, yeah.

• 20:41Speaker 03

  I think it was almost the same year, in fact.

• 20:43Speaker 04

  Was it?

• 20:44Speaker 06

  What a year.

• 20:45Speaker 04

  What a year.

• 20:45Speaker 03

  What a year.

• 20:46Speaker 04

  And those two things were so...

• 20:47Speaker 03

  I had my first child as well.

• 20:48Speaker 04

  Was it? No way!

• 20:50Speaker 03

  Yes, it was.

• 20:50Speaker 06

  And that's why I brought it up because he's so good at linking stuff back to parenting how.

• 20:54Speaker 04

  So you had your first child as everything just broke in one kind of...

• 20:58Speaker 03

  Yes, that's correct.

• 21:00Speaker 04

  Wow. And what was that like?

• 21:03Speaker 03

  Um, I think you can imagine what that was like.

• 21:05Speaker 06

  Did you like the coffee table nearer you to put your tea down?

• 21:07Speaker 03

  Oh, that's very kind. I don't mind holding it.

• 21:09Speaker 06

  No, because I put it in front of you and then Josh came in and moved it back.

• 21:13Speaker 03

  He did, didn't he?

• 21:14Speaker 06

  No, no, that's okay.

• 21:15Speaker 03

  Yes, thank you.

• 21:16Speaker 06

  They can share it, you guys. Yeah, I'll just keep mine on the floor.

• 21:19Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 21:20Speaker 06

  Keep this class system in order.

• 21:21Speaker 03

  I think they were both kind of filmed at the same time, but I'm not sure which one came out first.

• 21:25Speaker 04

  Were you pregnant in either of them?

• 21:27Speaker 03

  No.

• 21:27Speaker 04

  No? So how old would you have been at that point?

• 21:31Speaker 03

  I was just 25.

• 21:32Speaker 04

  Just 25?

• 21:33Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 21:34Speaker 04

  And so your whole life just changes in one kind of year?

• 21:37Speaker 03

  Yeah. I mean, I did, I think I, you know, I was already...

• 21:41Speaker 04

  You know, I mean, I did kind of pack, I'd already packed in quite a lot anyway.

• 21:45Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 21:45Speaker 04

  You know.

• 21:46Speaker 03

  Twenty five is quite young though, to sort of like in the world of acting and TV to have a child and also two massive shows at that point that really launched you into sort of like popular culture. So was it an over, like, how did that year feel at the time?

• 22:00Speaker 04

  Well, it felt like I was just packing a lot in. Yeah. Packing, packing a lot in.

• 22:08Speaker 04

  But, you know. And so when you come to the second series of Space. Mm hmm. Are you doing that one with a small child? You're writing it and recording it? We, we wrote nearby, which was lovely. Simon came over and there was, we had a little office that was nearby. So I could come back and forth while I was writing.

• 22:24Speaker 03

  Is that, is that the perfect, as an actor writes, is that the perfect job, the writing job with a newborn baby? Or, cause like being on set and early starts is a bit more logistics and all over the place.

• 22:35Speaker 04

  I mean, I wouldn't necessarily say that, but it's definitely of the pro, during the process, it's definitely, you know, easier, I would say, because it's less intense and obviously there's less early morning.

• 22:46Speaker 03

  Yeah. So, so how many kids have you got? What are their ages now?

• 22:50Speaker 04

  They're three, they're all grown up. So they're not really kids anymore. They're all adults. So what, what age is? Does that mean I'm not technically a parent anymore?

• 22:55Speaker 04

  No, you're still a parent.

• 22:58Speaker 03

  That's how, yeah, that's how it works, isn't it? So how old?

• 23:01Speaker 04

  Do you wanna go? When do I, can I reinvent myself now as a non-parent? You can reinvent yourself as a non-parent. I've really done it. I've done a great job.

• 23:08Speaker 03

  So what, so if you.

• 23:09Speaker 04

  It's time to just hang up my, you know, lectures.

• 23:12Speaker 03

  If they were here now, how would you introduce them then? If you don't wanna be the parent, if you're not a parent anymore, they are.

• 23:17Speaker 04

  My mates. They're my children, obviously.

• 23:21Speaker 04

  My adorable children. Yeah. And are they all moved out? Yeah, pretty much. I mean, the thing is, I think, you know, like, we were, we were all together a lot, but yeah, they have.

• 23:31Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah.

• 23:32Speaker 04

  Do you feel nostalgic when you think back to those times, those early times? Well, I do say, I mean, your kids, the ages that your kids are, yours are ten and eight, aren't they? Rob's a ten, right? Ten and eight and yours are eight and four. Yeah. It must be really annoying when people say, which I'm sure they do, oh my God, just enjoy it, enjoy it. Enjoy it. And you're thinking, what are you talking about? Like, how are you, which did you wanna make? Exactly. presumably that's why you're doing this podcast. But it's actually. It's so, you know, yes, enjoy it. And, you know, if there's one thing I would say is, is do go back to the place that they, that is the most simplest, nicest place to go on holiday.

• 24:12Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 24:12Speaker 04

  You don't need anything fancy.

• 24:15Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 24:15Speaker 04

  Literally just a different place.

• 24:17Speaker 03

  That's easy. And you know where everything is. They eat the pasta in that restaurant. You know, there's no steps to the beach.

• 24:23Speaker 04

  He's got it.

• 24:23Speaker 03

  Thank you.

• 24:24Speaker 04

  Rob's got it.

• 24:25Speaker 03

  There's only one thing I do well and that's holidays.

• 24:27Speaker 04

  Do you, Rob? Oh, I can, oh, I love to hearing about family holidays.

• 24:32Speaker 03

  Yeah, I do. We, we go hard on holidays and experiences over things more so, I'd say us.

• 24:38Speaker 04

  That is so good. And do you tend to go back?

• 24:41Speaker 03

  Experience is repeatedly going on rides in Florida, but it's still an experience.

• 24:45Speaker 04

  Is that where you go back? Do you regularly go back to the same place?

• 24:48Speaker 03

  We regularly go back there to do the ride. The kids love all the rides, like Universal and Disney. We know them all stuff. And then we go to, there's a few different, uh, um, resorts that we go to where we've been to before. That are really good. So we're, we're very comfortable going back there. The kids love it and we love it. And we know that if we go there, we're gonna relax straight away.

• 25:05Speaker 04

  Yeah. When I was a kid, we used to go to the same place every year. Nice. Where was that? Pembrokeshire in West Wales. Um, and Pembrokeshire's lovely. Yeah. But I think I, cause we went every year, I think I've actually got more fond nostalgic memories of that place. Cause it felt like we're going, than if we'd dotted around and you go, oh yeah, we went on that holiday. Going to the same place actually makes it almost more vivid in a way. Absolutely. And, and, and cause you kind of, they almost merge. And, and when, and when everyone's talking about it. Everyone's like, is that, was that the time that, oh, no, no.

• 25:38Speaker 03

  Yeah, what year was that?

• 25:39Speaker 04

  What year was that? And was I, was I eight or was I, was I five or, you know, and I, and I do think going back and going back to the same place is such a good shout.

• 25:47Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 25:47Speaker 04

  I do. That's, that's the only thing, that's the only, I would never, ever give parent advice to anyone.

• 25:52Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 25:53Speaker 04

  Ever. But like, that is something that I do tentatively suggest.

• 25:57Speaker 03

  So and where did you go?

• 25:59Speaker 04

  Well, we, we always used to go to this place at, at, at one point.

• 26:02Speaker 03

  You don't need to be specific.

• 26:03Speaker 04

  No, I'll give you the address. This is where we will be. No, it's just this gorgeous, we used to rent these gorgeous little holiday cottages just down in Cornwall. That's it. And it lovely fields, little creek. And it was the most beautiful place, run by people who were so friendly and welcoming and lovely. And, you know, and yeah, I, we went there to the point where at one point, one of the kids was like, do we, is, do we own this? It was like, no. We do not, if only. Cause it was just this beautiful, really simple place and you get there and you can just run out the car, run out in the fields. And then everyone disappears and comes back with loads of stories and goes, oh god, so that's happened. And then they're down there and they're in the river and I don't know if we can get it back again.

• 26:48Speaker 04

  But anyway, I've got to go back again, but I I need some crisps, I need some, I need something to drink. And then, and that's like the best, the best, the best. Um, so I wish we'd done that more, the most simple, simple things.

• 27:01Speaker 03

  Have you gone back since they've grown up?

• 27:02Speaker 04

  Oh, yeah, yeah, we've gone.

• 27:03Speaker 06

  Oh, that's nice.

• 27:04Speaker 04

  The saddest. Anyway, we'll, we'll be there.

• 27:08Speaker 04

  Just so you know our dates, um, obviously we'll, we'll, we'll be at the same place. So just let us know if you need picking up for the station.

• 27:16Speaker 06

  Oh, we'll drive and get you from Newcastle and bring you down.

• 27:18Speaker 04

  Exactly.

• 27:20Speaker 06

  If any of your uni friends want to come.

• 27:22Speaker 04

  Yes, exactly. But that was, but that was kind of magical as well, cause we kind of know the people who actually do own the places and they're.

• 27:28Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 27:29Speaker 04

  And that's sweet to build a relationship with them.

• 27:30Speaker 03

  Are they, um, are they, uh, near sort of having families of their own or they very much sort of mid twenties sort of living their life?

• 27:37Speaker 04

  Still in their twenties, living their lives, yeah. But that, I mean, that for me, I mean, that's like, yeah, then you have, they could potentially be in here having families if they wanted.

• 27:45Speaker 03

  But that's, I think they're the years where they go missing the most for parents.

• 27:48Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 27:49Speaker 03

  Because when they do have kids, that's when they gravitate back to sort of.

• 27:52Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 27:53Speaker 03

  Home, normality, advice or childcare and but that with that twenties is a bit of they're, they're off.

• 27:59Speaker 04

  Yeah. Do you, did you both gravitate back to like? So I've just moved back to Devon. In, in, back into your parents' house? I've just moved back into my parents', my, my wife's just divorced. How's that going? She, okay, right, good.

• 28:14Speaker 04

  You need the help, Josh, you need the help.

• 28:16Speaker 06

  Not wanting to be a parent, things come full circle.

• 28:19Speaker 04

  No, so I moved away when I was eighteen, went to, I grew up in Devon. Yeah. Went to Manchester and then came to London for like twenty years. But then we were just finding where we lived in London too much for the kids. So we moved back to Devon, but not exactly where I grew up. It's not like the, and so they're going to the same school and all that. No, no, okay. Yeah, but yeah, I never, ever, ever thought that would happen. But did you ever, ever, ever think that you were gonna have children? No. There you go. Did you?

• 28:47Speaker 03

  Yeah, I always wanted a family and kids.

• 28:49Speaker 04

  Yeah. Did you? I did. I do love babies. I've always loved babies. You know, and obviously, that's, that's, that's a big help. I mean, it's not, it's not a total game, I mean, you know, it's not a total prerequisite, but it does help. I do love babies, to the point that

• 29:07Speaker 04

  that I would often like make friends with babies, like other people's babies.

• 29:11Speaker 06

  Oh, would you?

• 29:12Speaker 04

  Yeah. Oh, in a queue, in crying on an aeroplane.

• 29:16Speaker 06

  Oh, really? You'd offer to hold?

• 29:18Speaker 04

  Oh, I would offer, always offer to hold.

• 29:20Speaker 06

  Really?

• 29:20Speaker 04

  Oh, I would, I would hover around, you know, if they're there by the loos, just rocking the baby, I'd just kind of go.

• 29:25Speaker 06

  What's your success rate on the yes from that offer to hold, or is it?

• 29:29Speaker 04

  Well, in some cases, maybe perhaps I should have waited for a yes, because.

• 29:37Speaker 06

  You've clucked like the pipe.

• 29:38Speaker 04

  I'm just joking, of course I waited for a yes. But yeah, no, I mean, surprisingly, but then it becomes almost a case of them not wanting to be rude. Because of the pleading look in my eyes. They think, she really, really wants to hold this baby, maybe I should just let her hold it. But, but my children are now, will now say, if they said, if they see a baby, they're like, mum, just leave the baby, leave the baby.

• 29:59Speaker 06

  Oh, really?

• 29:59Speaker 04

  Don't touch the baby, just don't approach the baby, don't look at the baby, you know, and I'm like, come on.

• 30:03Speaker 06

  Would you take your seat, not, not if the seatbelt sign was on, but if you were in, if you were seated on a plane?

• 30:09Speaker 04

  Seated on a plane, I gravitate towards the crying baby sound, yeah.

• 30:12Speaker 06

  Wow.

• 30:13Speaker 04

  Yeah, I do.

• 30:14Speaker 06

  You ask me move closer.

• 30:15Speaker 04

  I, I just hover around, I just, I just have a feeling of like, maybe they need, especially on a long haul.

• 30:21Speaker 06

  And do they ever go, are you, but you're?

• 30:24Speaker 04

  Never, no, no, never, never, of course they don't, no, and also, you're, you're on a long haul flight of people from everywhere, you know.

• 30:30Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. I, I do try to.

• 30:32Speaker 04

  Or maybe they're secretly going, oh.

• 30:34Speaker 06

  Oh, is that?

• 30:35Speaker 04

  Yeah, maybe they're inside, they're thinking, Cheryl from the royal family.

• 30:39Speaker 06

  But also as well, you don't want to ask that if the baby's asleep at that point. Yeah. Instead of the conversation with the person holding the baby.

• 30:44Speaker 04

  You'd never wrestle a sleeping baby away from a contented mother, no.

• 30:48Speaker 06

  I do try and like, if someone's got a baby that's kicking off, I don't really offer, but I do sort of like, sort of smile at them. And sort of give them like, you know, or like, you're doing well, you know, that kind of thing, it's so hard.

• 30:59Speaker 04

  I do, I do as well.

• 31:00Speaker 06

  So brutal.

• 31:01Speaker 04

  Oh, it's brutal, yeah.

• 31:16Speaker 06

  It's fucking mental.

• 31:18Speaker 04

  How old's your kid?

• 31:19Speaker 06

  How long have you done this for?

• 31:20Speaker 04

  Do you look good?

• 31:22Speaker 06

  Feel shite.

• 31:26Speaker 04

  Do you want a drink or anything? Have you got a drink?

• 31:27Speaker 06

  Yeah, I'll have like a cognac. That's what you start drinking like when you're.

• 31:30Speaker 04

  Just a little red wine.

• 31:31Speaker 06

  Oh my god.

• 31:32Speaker 04

  How old's your child?

• 31:33Speaker 06

  How old's my child? My child is twelve weeks.

• 31:37Speaker 04

  Oh, fucking hell, mate.

• 31:39Speaker 06

  Guys, it's like the most intense thing I've ever experienced. Like, it's so in, the way, like, how long have you guys done this for? How old are your kids?

• 31:47Speaker 03

  Ten years, so.

• 31:48Speaker 04

  Eight years. It gets easier, and anyone that tells you it doesn't get easier is insane, because I would not trade the position you're in.

• 31:57Speaker 03

  No, it gets easier, but your, your body and mine become a wreck. So it's easier by.

• 32:02Speaker 04

  I thought you were gonna say wrecked.

• 32:03Speaker 03

  No, no, no. It's easier, but you're just, by ten years, you, you feel like, you know.

• 32:08Speaker 06

  It's mad. It's mad. Like, someone, someone's, I don't know if you've seen this, someone showed me a clip of some guy calling it a Ponzi scheme, where they're literally like, come on, come do it. And then you do it and they're like, gotcha. And you're like, what is it? It's like.

• 32:22Speaker 03

  So what's the challenge, what's the main challenge at the moment for you that you're finding difficult?

• 32:26Speaker 06

  Um, uh, so Ziggy, my.

• 32:29Speaker 04

  Nice, great.

• 32:30Speaker 03

  Good name, yeah.

• 32:32Speaker 06

  Ziggy. Um, he's.

• 32:34Speaker 03

  What, is he a cavapoo?

• 32:35Speaker 06

  Yeah, he's a cavapoo.

• 32:38Speaker 06

  So many dogs called Ziggy. It's wild. Um, it's just, it's just, we're in the stage now where he, I think he's got a little bit of regression, is it called? So he's not sleeping as well.

• 32:48Speaker 03

  Yeah, they get into a routine and that changes as they develop.

• 32:51Speaker 06

  Man, it's crazy. And it's like, it's, it's also, if I had realised when I was a kid, like, how much power, I would have been like a complete dictator. I would like, it's just crazy. And that he's not really sleeping that much and you're up. This is our routine. We have a little bit of routine. Right, I'm gonna give it to you. Feed at 7pm.

• 33:11Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 33:12Speaker 06

  Then he goes to bed. Or feed at 6.30, then he goes to bed at 7.

• 33:15Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 33:15Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 33:15Speaker 06

  Then he's up at 11pm for another feed.

• 33:18Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 33:19Speaker 04

  Yeah. Are you staying up for those four hours?

• 33:22Speaker 06

  Well, yeah, sometimes I do, which is such a stupid.

• 33:25Speaker 03

  Breastfed or bottle feed or both?

• 33:27Speaker 06

  Breastfed until recently, now he feeds just on candy.

• 33:32Speaker 04

  That might be what's doing the sleep.

• 33:34Speaker 03

  Watermelon sour.

• 33:36Speaker 06

  Speaking of that, that's good for kids, isn't it? And so now, so he's breastfed, now he's bottle fed. And then we do another one at 11.

• 33:44Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 33:44Speaker 06

  Sometimes I stay up for it, which is a really rogue decision.

• 33:47Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 33:48Speaker 06

  Cause it's like 9 o'clock and I'm like, am I really gonna sleep for these next two hours? So I don't. Then he goes to sleep again, then he wakes up at like 2 or 3.

• 33:55Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 33:55Speaker 06

  Then it's another feed.

• 33:56Speaker 04

  Yeah. And are you waking up then?

• 33:58Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 33:58Speaker 04

  Out of a.

• 33:59Speaker 03

  Both together for every feed.

• 34:01Speaker 06

  Hmm.

• 34:02Speaker 04

  Good man.

• 34:03Speaker 06

  Because I wouldn't, but I feel guilty, I feel bad if I don't.

• 34:06Speaker 04

  But that's how they, in the olden days. That wasn't happening. But you're a, you're a good modern man, Jamie.

• 34:12Speaker 03

  Do you not attempt to split it and go, well, I'll do 11 and 2. And then Sophie does the next one after 2. Rather than you both doing it together.

• 34:22Speaker 06

  The next one after 2 is 7.

• 34:23Speaker 03

  Yeah, so then she gets a full night's sleep.

• 34:26Speaker 06

  But then I'm up at 7 anyway.

• 34:27Speaker 03

  Yeah, no, but I'm saying rather than you both being there doing one job.

• 34:30Speaker 06

  Yeah, I, I get, yeah.

• 34:31Speaker 03

  Do you know what I'm saying?

• 34:33Speaker 04

  But sometimes there's more support, Rob.

• 34:34Speaker 03

  Yeah, I know that, but he, he sounds, no offence, he looks absolutely fucking devastated, the man. He looks like he's come back from the fucking frontline.

• 34:43Speaker 06

  Oh my god. And then I saw, Rob, I saw your Instagram post, this is just before I think I had kids, or just after I had kids, which was that you, it was something about, you know, being 10 years or whatever it is. And it was the best thing you've ever done, but the hardest thing you've ever done.

• 34:57Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 34:58Speaker 06

  And I was like, it can't be that hard.

• 35:02Speaker 03

  It's so much harder than my job.

• 35:03Speaker 04

  Yeah, oh yeah.

• 35:04Speaker 06

  It's so much harder. It's so much harder. It's actually mental.

• 35:10Speaker 04

  Particularly, let's be clear, our jobs.

• 35:12Speaker 03

  Yeah, our job.

• 35:14Speaker 04

  Some people's jobs are a lot more difficult than our jobs.

• 35:17Speaker 03

  Are you currently filming your show? You've got a reality show.

• 35:20Speaker 06

  Mm-hmm.

• 35:20Speaker 03

  About having a baby, three parts on Disney Plus. Is that being filmed at the moment?

• 35:24Speaker 06

  That is great.

• 35:25Speaker 04

  See, that's why he's good at his job. He finds that easier than parenting.

• 35:28Speaker 06

  It was also seamless.

• 35:30Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 35:31Speaker 06

  I wouldn't even, it was like, it's a seamless.

• 35:33Speaker 03

  It's just a guy having a chat with another guy. Getting a few key details in.

• 35:36Speaker 04

  It does get annoying actually in day-to-day life. Rob will do that all the time. He'll go, "How's your tour? Calling in promptly. Night, man." And then he'll do the four.

• 35:45Speaker 03

  The four on. How's it going then? Dot josh will become.

• 35:50Speaker 04

  Scan the QR code for tickets.

• 35:52Speaker 03

  So are you filming that now? Or has that been filmed? Or are you gonna film it soon? What's happening?

• 35:57Speaker 06

  Thanks for asking, Rob.

• 36:00Speaker 03

  Apart from the promo reasons, obviously you've got the extra stress of most people having a baby.

• 36:06Speaker 04

  Do you have to wake up the camera crew?

• 36:10Speaker 06

  Guys, they came.

• 36:12Speaker 03

  He wants to be in every scene, that's why he's doing the feed. Fuck off, Sophie. Jamie's a...

• 36:16Speaker 06

  Look at me trying to breastfeed him on my tit. I can do this. So, yeah, so we shot a Disney Plus docu-series, reality series, which is a three-part series, which was following like Sophie and I before she was pregnant.

• 36:30Speaker 03

  Yep.

• 36:31Speaker 06

  Then, so we were shooting it before.

• 36:32Speaker 03

  Not during getting pregnant.

• 36:34Speaker 06

  And then not, well, actually, they weren't there.

• 36:36Speaker 04

  That's on a very different website.

• 36:37Speaker 03

  That's a 20-second cut scene.

• 36:39Speaker 06

  Not even that.

• 36:42Speaker 06

  So it was before conception.

• 36:44Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 36:45Speaker 06

  And then when we were filming it, Sophie then fell pregnant. So they were like, "Oh my god, well, we should..."

• 36:50Speaker 04

  Oh, there we go.

• 36:51Speaker 06

  Followed. And so it was kind of great for them. So then we followed all the pregnancy and then a little bit after the pregnancy as well.

• 36:57Speaker 04

  How was the pregnancy?

• 36:59Speaker 06

  Man, I, like, women, like, I'm not just saying, women are amazing. They are. I've watched...

• 37:04Speaker 03

  Manosphere. I know.

• 37:09Speaker 04

  I've seen the Louis Theroux.

• 37:10Speaker 06

  I've seen the Louis Theroux.

• 37:12Speaker 03

  Do you know the first British astronaut in space was actually a woman?

• 37:15Speaker 04

  Yeah, Helen Sharman.

• 37:16Speaker 03

  Thank you.

• 37:17Speaker 04

  Do you wanna hear another interesting fact about her?

• 37:19Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 37:19Speaker 04

  Uh, cuz I was on a show with Helen Sharman, so I Wikipeded her. She invented the Cornetto.

• 37:25Speaker 06

  Really?

• 37:26Speaker 04

  And that's gonna appeal to you, cuz that's, that's right in your biz.

• 37:30Speaker 06

  Cornetos don't have any milk in it.

• 37:33Speaker 04

  Okay, I didn't know that. I would've brought that up with her.

• 37:36Speaker 06

  Did you, did you know that, um, the person who invented the tampon was a man?

• 37:40Speaker 03

  Oh, oh, alright.

• 37:42Speaker 04

  Maybe Louis Theroux needs to do a documentary on you, Jamie.

• 37:46Speaker 06

  Okay, anyway, so we were, so we, we were shooting this, so we shot the show, and then Sophie fell pregnant, and then we were shooting it during Sophie being pregnant, and then we shot a bit afterwards. And as I said, the, the pregnancy bit is, is kinda wild.

• 37:58Speaker 03

  Yeah, the personality can change due to the hormones and stuff as well, which can make the relationship a bit more testing.

• 38:04Speaker 06

  Hmm.

• 38:05Speaker 04

  Or easier.

• 38:06Speaker 03

  I didn't say it's better or worse.

• 38:08Speaker 06

  It's, yeah.

• 38:09Speaker 03

  Sometimes you do a test and it's an easy test. Sometimes you do a test and you sort of do that test and go, is this the person I'm married?

• 38:16Speaker 06

  Now, what?

• 38:17Speaker 03

  It's just different types of tests.

• 38:19Speaker 06

  There was, there was moment, there were like some moments where, it, it was firstly, I just wanna say, like, if Sophie will be listening, Sophie, I love you so much, and she was incredible, and she was amazing.

• 38:28Speaker 04

  Snap that out, Michael.

• 38:30Speaker 06

  Don't edit that bit out, please. But there were, there were some moments which are like, quite hectic, and I think because, because her body was changing, and she also got something called, um, pelvic synthesis, which is where her hip bone became really sore. She also, because she's quite slender, she went, uh, she, she was heavy on the front, so she went quite big, and to the point where-

• 38:54Speaker 03

  Heavy on the front?

• 38:56Speaker 06

  Yeah, that's how she wants me to describe it.

• 38:57Speaker 03

  Okay, fair enough.

• 38:58Speaker 06

  So heavy, she's very heavy on the front. To the point, to the point where in the mornings, she couldn't get herself out of bed, so I had to- We thought at one point I was gonna have to drill a piece of rope into the ceiling to pull herself out.

• 39:12Speaker 06

  And there was a lot of that, but then the real tough moments became quite testing because there were moments like she would, I would do something wrong to piss her off.

• 39:20Speaker 03

  Hmm.

• 39:21Speaker 06

  And her reaction was like zero to a hundred where she would say, she would say things suddenly like, um, I hate your parents. And I'm like, whoa, where's that come from? But it was, yeah, it was wild and amazing and the, and the guys followed the whole, whole process of it, which was really hard for Soph.

• 39:39Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 39:39Speaker 06

  Because you're pregnant.

• 39:41Speaker 03

  Because you're siding up to a bit of a fluffy, should we have kids? We might want kids. And all of a sudden it's real and it's your first time expecting a baby and just got cameras there.

• 39:48Speaker 06

  And it's really scary.

• 39:49Speaker 03

  Did they film the birth?

• 39:51Speaker 06

  Well, they, they weren't in for the birth, but.

• 39:55Speaker 03

  Go prone on your forehead.

• 39:57Speaker 06

  But.

• 39:57Speaker 03

  Like the Trainspotter.

• 39:58Speaker 06

  But this is, I, this is.

• 40:00Speaker 04

  Francis Bourgeois.

• 40:03Speaker 03

  Great idea. We've got Francis coming.

• 40:06Speaker 06

  We've got Francis boudoir, what's it?

• 40:08Speaker 04

  Bourgeois, yeah.

• 40:09Speaker 06

  We've got Francis boudoir.

• 40:10Speaker 03

  The train is leaving the tunnel.

• 40:15Speaker 06

  Come on, Soph.

• 40:20Speaker 06

  We got, we hired Francis Bourgeois as a cameo.

• 40:25Speaker 03

  Content, content.

• 40:27Speaker 04

  Also you collab with him. That's, that's huge.

• 40:30Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 40:30Speaker 03

  You've got viral.

• 40:31Speaker 06

  Yeah, it's huge, it's huge.

• 40:32Speaker 04

  It's huge.

• 40:33Speaker 06

  It was a great decision. But, um, the, we, we were, so we were in the, um, so we were, we were in the hospital and the whole, we were trying to do all natural and everything like that. And then, um, Soph, they had to say it was emergency C-section.

• 40:48Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 40:49Speaker 06

  Which is really quite scary.

• 40:50Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 40:51Speaker 06

  Like, oh my God, because you already.

• 40:52Speaker 04

  Particularly Francis is doing it.

• 40:54Speaker 06

  Francis is there, wasn't going for it.

• 40:57Speaker 04

  Don't give him the knife.

• 40:59Speaker 06

  And all his reactions.

• 41:02Speaker 06

  Anyway, that was quite scary.

• 41:03Speaker 04

  Yeah, it's awful because that's what happened to us. And it's suddenly you're in an operation and it's terrifying.

• 41:08Speaker 06

  But the whole thing is really scary.

• 41:09Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 41:10Speaker 06

  Like, like, because you, it's, it's the only sort of situation where you feel completely out of control.

• 41:14Speaker 03

  Hmm.

• 41:14Speaker 06

  Because you don't know, and you, I know a little bit about most things, I would like a little bit, right? When it comes to giving birth. And I know nothing. So you're standing in the room and what happened with Ziggy was there were complications and they said, look, Soph, I know you want to do it natural, but I think you're gonna have to change it up. You're gonna have to do an emergency C-section. And she was so brave. I mean, it was like the most insane thing I've ever seen, like so brave. I was in bits. And I was trying, I had to keep like turning, I was like, wipe my eyes. It's like Noah's Ark. I was like, oh my God, this is like actually embarrassing. And then by the time they said we have to do emergency C-section, to the point where you're in your scrubs in there, it's like five minutes.

• 41:54Speaker 04

  Yeah, yeah, it's so quick.

• 41:55Speaker 06

  So quick.

• 41:56Speaker 04

  They really take the word emergency seriously, don't they?

• 41:59Speaker 06

  And then our amazing.

• 42:01Speaker 04

  Took your iPods out.

• 42:04Speaker 03

  Fast service from Zone 6 to London.

• 42:08Speaker 06

  And then our amazing.

• 42:09Speaker 03

  So quick.

• 42:10Speaker 06

  Who's the doctor?

• 42:11Speaker 03

  It's a bullet train.

• 42:12Speaker 06

  What's the doctor who does it all called?

• 42:14Speaker 03

  Surgeon?

• 42:15Speaker 06

  No, it's called the.

• 42:16Speaker 04

  Oh, right. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 42:17Speaker 06

  The doctor who did it was amazing. He came in listening to music to just calm himself down. I was like.

• 42:21Speaker 04

  Calm himself down?

• 42:22Speaker 06

  Yeah, he was listening to music, but he was incredible.

• 42:23Speaker 04

  Like a footballer getting off the coach at a away game.

• 42:26Speaker 03

  You're doing Jamie Lang's baby. I'll give you the fucking headphones.

• 42:30Speaker 06

  So we had that in. So then we were there and no one was filming it because we didn't want cameras in. But one of the midwives, who was this amazing lady, incredible, she picked up my phone and started recording the whole thing.

• 42:43Speaker 03

  Oh, wow.

• 42:44Speaker 06

  So she, it was like, it was like Martin Scorsese had like directed, it was insane. So film the thing. So.

• 42:50Speaker 03

  What angle is she getting there?

• 42:51Speaker 06

  She's right in there. It's also landscape. It wasn't.

• 42:55Speaker 04

  Well, that's not good for Insta.

• 42:56Speaker 06

  No, but for TV.

• 43:01Speaker 06

  It was insane. But guys, it's insane. So what was captured was like this pure.

• 43:05Speaker 04

  It was GK Barry, wasn't it?

• 43:07Speaker 06

  It's just whole setup. But she was filming it. So the reaction was like, it's, we were so insane and real.

• 43:14Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 43:14Speaker 06

  Because we didn't realize we were being filmed.

• 43:16Speaker 03

  Because she's someone you trust, a midwife with your phone.

• 43:18Speaker 06

  But we didn't know she was filming it.

• 43:19Speaker 03

  Oh, really?

• 43:20Speaker 06

  So everything was so real. And when Ziggy came out and everything's okay, and that whole bit, when you're just waiting for the cry.

• 43:27Speaker 04

  And how graphic was the filming?

• 43:29Speaker 06

  You don't see anything, but you see Ziggy being taken up through the tummy and.

• 43:33Speaker 04

  Oh, my God. Yeah.

• 43:34Speaker 06

  Yeah, it was a lot. And then you hear the cry.

• 43:36Speaker 04

  Which end were you?

• 43:38Speaker 06

  I went down Botman to have a look and it was quite a lot because the Cesarean also they really open up your tummy.

• 43:43Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 43:44Speaker 06

  But we feel that and then that's also now in the show.

• 43:48Speaker 03

  Wow.

• 43:53Speaker 00

  Parenting unlocks some pretty impressive skills like carrying grocery bags, a soccer ball and a sleepy kid all at once. Good thing the newly designed Chrysler Pacifica has a few tricks of its own. Hands-free power sliding doors and liftgate, rear seat entertainment and stow and go seating and storage that adapts faster than your family's weekend plans. Visit Chrysler.com to learn more. Chrysler is a registered trademark of FCAUS LLC.

• 44:22Speaker 02

  Hey Spotify listeners, when you travel with American Airlines, you'll enjoy comfort and convenience at every altitude. Before takeoff, unwind in the Admirals Club Lounge with curated self-serve offerings of hearty bites and refreshments. In flight, stay connected with high-speed Wi-Fi, sponsored by AT&T. Your journey is designed to feel easy from the moment you check in to the moment you arrive. No matter where you're going, American gets you there. Book now at AA.com.

• 44:49Speaker 01

  Pink Pantheress here. Coach and Spotify are teaming up to bring music and style together and they want you to be part of it. Grab your friends and head to the Tabby Tour, hitting cities around the country with live performances from special artists, exclusive experiences and personalised products. And discover custom playlists on Spotify, booked just for you based on who you are and how you listen. Live your story with Coach. Learn more at coach.com.

• 45:19Speaker 04

  So you're all sleeping in the same bed? Yes. Are you getting much sleep? Not really. At the moment, it was going well with my three-year-old when she was in...

• 45:28Speaker 01

  Infant, she nursed all the time, like she, even when I was sleeping, she like, I was just a pacifier.

• 45:35Speaker 03

  Right.

• 45:35Speaker 01

  Um, so this baby is like, he's such a boy, like he like, he eats and then he like rolls over and farts and falls asleep. He's an, an old man already.

• 45:47Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 45:47Speaker 01

  Um, and that was lovely because I was like, great, he's asleep and I'm not attached to him. And now that he's getting a bit, uh, he's a bit older, he, I feel like he needs to, he wants to eat more at night. So he kind of, he wakes up a little bit more than he was, he was.

• 46:04Speaker 03

  And how, how long did you breastfeed the, the youngest, sorry, the eldest?

• 46:07Speaker 01

  Two years and a couple of months.

• 46:08Speaker 03

  Yes, that's a long time and then going into another, it's like a lot of your body being used by someone else.

• 46:14Speaker 01

  Pregnant or breastfeeding.

• 46:15Speaker 04

  Before we get to the belly button.

• 46:16Speaker 01

  Yeah, exactly. I've been pregnant or breastfeeding since twenty twenty two.

• 46:21Speaker 03

  Wow.

• 46:22Speaker 01

  Cause by the time I stopped breastfeeding my, my three year old, I, uh, was already pregnant.

• 46:29Speaker 03

  And to, and when, when did, was that the, your two year old just didn't want it anymore? Or did you have to sort of, cause she was using breastfeeding as a pacifier, did you have to break that? Was it difficult?

• 46:39Speaker 01

  By the time we stopped, it was, um, she wasn't doing as much anymore. She was kind of weaning herself.

• 46:45Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 46:45Speaker 01

  And then the worst part, it was, um, flights. Cause it was always something that kind of like on takeoff and landing or.

• 46:52Speaker 03

  Oh, it'd make her feel better.

• 46:54Speaker 01

  Yeah, it would just like make her pass out.

• 46:56Speaker 03

  And then when they get to two though, cause they're like bowling around like a little person, they'll just literally go up to you, grab your top and just whip a boobie, you have no stop like.

• 47:03Speaker 01

  She, well, she had, oh, this was worse. I forgot about this. Uh, she did a thing before the belly button. She used to do a thing just with my nipple. She would use it as like a, I swear, it was like she was tuning a radiator. It was like.

• 47:16Speaker 03

  And semi skimmed.

• 47:20Speaker 01

  Not quite the flavor I like.

• 47:23Speaker 03

  Do you do strawberry?

• 47:25Speaker 01

  Yeah. Uh, and that was, that was awful. Um, I really hated that.

• 47:30Speaker 03

  It's so hard though, if they're doing something that they enjoy and they're like, and you wanna go like, I mean, I've obviously as a man, never experienced it, but you don't wanna be like, get the fuck off me, but that's how you feel, but you wanna have a like.

• 47:39Speaker 01

  Yeah, you have to be nice about it. Like you can't, like, cause you don't wanna, you also don't wanna shame them, you know, and make them feel, so don't listen to this.

• 47:49Speaker 01

  Never listen to this episode.

• 47:53Speaker 01

  Um, yeah, and it, it, you wanna, you know, you don't wanna yell at them, you don't, because they, they don't understand that it's

• 48:00Speaker 04

  Weird.

• 48:00Speaker 01

  torture.

• 48:04Speaker 01

  But yeah, yeah, it's a lot of your body. It's a lot of your body being, like, I, I woke myself up. Uh, cause I was, I was dreaming that I was like, there was birds on me.

• 48:17Speaker 04

  Yeah, okay.

• 48:18Speaker 01

  And I woke up going, stop. And I was hitting my body. And it was just cause my daughter was trying to belly button.

• 48:26Speaker 04

  Oh, really?

• 48:27Speaker 01

  And I was like, oh, my God, I'm having like, like, stress dreams.

• 48:33Speaker 03

  Well, it must be so overwhelming having your body being used and touched all the time by.

• 48:37Speaker 04

  It's difficult to, cause it's not like you go, well, there's lots of books about how you end breastfeeding, but there's not many books about how you end having your belly button touched.

• 48:45Speaker 01

  Right. It's not a weaning situation, you know, like you can't be like, here, have some milk in a glass, in a cup instead of my belly button.

• 48:52Speaker 04

  The addiction is to the action rather than the, it's just a, yeah, oh.

• 48:57Speaker 03

  I don't think we have to throw addicts around.

• 49:00Speaker 04

  Oh, I think, I think you've got a problem there. I think. I think the Betty Ford Clinic might be.

• 49:08Speaker 04

  I think she needs to go cold turkey on belly buttons completely.

• 49:11Speaker 01

  You know, I've thought about wearing like a one-piece bedding suit.

• 49:15Speaker 04

  Like a kind of eighties aerobics instructor.

• 49:18Speaker 01

  Something she can't, like, in the summer, it was great because, um, I was wearing a swimsuit a lot.

• 49:24Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah.

• 49:25Speaker 01

  So, um, she couldn't get to my belly button as much.

• 49:27Speaker 04

  Yeah. Oh, my God, what a sentence.

• 49:31Speaker 03

  We're like, we're parenting, most people like routines key and king. For you, you're constantly moving around. And I say, if your husband's flying around working a lot and you're with the, the, um, the nannies. Like, so do you just sort of roll with it and see what happens? Or do you, do you have a routine with the kids? Or is it each day's a different day when you're touring?

• 49:47Speaker 01

  We have a, a, a semblance of a routine, you know, like it's, um, I Try to keep it as routine as possible with it being also as flexible as I need it to be. So like, you know, mornings, I would say are like are are kind of always are quiet like. This is my time with the kids and like we get up, we have breakfast, we um, you know, I try to get them outside for a little bit. And then, you know, I try to meal times, I try to keep as normal as possible. But it's really hard to be strict about.

• 50:27Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 50:27Speaker 01

  Anything, you know, like it's just like, oh, we're traveling today or um, so you can't nap or we gotta eat. At the, you know, whenever we can at the airport and.

• 50:38Speaker 03

  And do you get them with the nannies then? Do they speak English as well?

• 50:40Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, I've never once spoken to them.

• 50:48Speaker 03

  Pass their boarding passes to them.

• 50:51Speaker 03

  I'm sure they're all right.

• 50:52Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 50:53Speaker 03

  I just nodded a lot in the interview.

• 50:55Speaker 01

  No, they're great.

• 50:56Speaker 03

  Like a little gang now that's almost like a band touring like with the you and the kids, you get all get on and the stuff. Cause it's quite an intense relationship.

• 51:02Speaker 01

  We have a great time. I mean, they're um, you know, especially because, you know, here in London, we all stay together. So um, yeah, I mean, I think I hope they like me.

• 51:14Speaker 04

  And when you're doing tour shows, are they coming to the house? So say you're in, let's, let's, let's go through your tour dates. Say you're in.

• 51:26Speaker 03

  Cause you know, now you couldn't come in if they need, you need to breastfeed or whatever, but like if you're doing a gig and a show, really, you can't. Or will, can you? Or do you interrupt the show for that?

• 51:34Speaker 01

  I haven't, so I will, once I start touring, uh, the new one will be over six months. So he'll be able to have kind of like some water and food and stuff, so it won't be uh, as super necessary to keep him as close by. Never had to interrupt a gig for it.

• 51:53Speaker 03

  None.

• 51:53Speaker 01

  They have been in the green room before. But.

• 51:58Speaker 04

  So say June the 11th, when you're in Swindon.

• 52:00Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 52:01Speaker 03

  Wyverne?

• 52:02Speaker 04

  The Wyverne, old faithful. Doing the tour, best job in the world. Tell us about the show.

• 52:08Speaker 01

  Best Job in the World is a show about how maybe motherhood is not the best job in the world.

• 52:14Speaker 04

  There we go.

• 52:15Speaker 01

  But also just about society and, you know. The, I think my, a little bit of the thesis statement I have is that society's not made for women. And we've kind of contoured ourselves to fit in, but also I don't think society's made for men either. And you guys are having a hard time, so.

• 52:33Speaker 04

  Do you know what? That, genuinely.

• 52:35Speaker 03

  He's now he's in.

• 52:36Speaker 04

  Premises on stand-up shows very rarely interest me. And I buy into that.

• 52:40Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 52:41Speaker 04

  Normally I like.

• 52:41Speaker 03

  You've just done what the people do on our comments.

• 52:43Speaker 04

  You what?

• 52:43Speaker 03

  I didn't think I liked you.

• 52:45Speaker 04

  No, I just said I didn't think I liked stand-up premises.

• 52:48Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 52:49Speaker 04

  But you've broken the mould.

• 52:50Speaker 01

  Oh, thank you, thank you.

• 52:52Speaker 04

  So you'll be doing that at the Swindon Wyverne, June 11th, talking through the kids on that day.

• 52:57Speaker 01

  So, this is how we've planned this section of the tour. And for everyone who's mentioned, why am I not going further north? Because this first whole section.

• 53:06Speaker 04

  Well, let me go. Swindon, Northampton, Chelmsford, Epsom, Pold, you really are keeping it south. I'm here on Keynes, Watford, Coventry, quite northerly. Farnham, London, back to your old stomping grounds, London again, Brighton, Newbury, Bath, Norwich, Norwich, Bristol, Cheltenham.

• 53:26Speaker 03

  Yeah, that is incredibly south.

• 53:27Speaker 01

  Yeah, so this whole first leg of the tour is just everything I can get from London to the show and back in one night.

• 53:35Speaker 04

  Oh, here we go.

• 53:37Speaker 01

  So I am.

• 53:38Speaker 03

  The radius tour.

• 53:39Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 53:41Speaker 01

  Everything within a two to three hour.

• 53:44Speaker 03

  Yep.

• 53:44Speaker 01

  Travel time.

• 53:47Speaker 01

  And that way I can leave the, the baby and the one nanny will come with me just for feeding purposes.

• 53:55Speaker 03

  Yep.

• 53:55Speaker 01

  The toddler and the other nanny will stay back at the flat.

• 53:58Speaker 04

  Can I ask a question? Do the nannies, are they on a man-to-man marking constantly? Or do they switch?

• 54:04Speaker 01

  No, right now they're man-to-man, yeah.

• 54:07Speaker 03

  So one's toddler, one's baby, and they never switch?

• 54:09Speaker 01

  Yeah, they don't switch. And they realized recently that, like, the, the top, like, that the, the babies also. Have an affinity for the nannies. And we've realized recently that their their their signs are the same. My my nanny and my toddler are both Capricorns.

• 54:29Speaker 04

  Oh, there we go.

• 54:30Speaker 01

  And my, the new baby and my other nanny are both, can't remember. Because I don't really buy into that too much.

• 54:39Speaker 04

  When is it?

• 54:39Speaker 01

  October, early October, Pisces, Sedentarius, Libra.

• 54:42Speaker 04

  Don't know.

• 54:43Speaker 03

  Taurus.

• 54:44Speaker 01

  Just one of them.

• 54:46Speaker 04

  So you'll go in a car with your.

• 54:50Speaker 03

  So you're a tour manager driving you?

• 54:52Speaker 01

  Yes, nanny, infant, me.

• 54:55Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 54:56Speaker 01

  We go to the gig, feed the baby before I go on stage.

• 55:01Speaker 04

  Do you need a lot of, because I I don't necessarily need to be on my own. But I need to almost be doing mindless stuff, like looking at my phone or or looking at my phone, really.

• 55:15Speaker 03

  So he needs to sit on his own in a room, looking at his phone before he goes on.

• 55:18Speaker 04

  No, but do you know what I mean? I I in that hour before, it's not like I'm prepping for the show or anything.

• 55:24Speaker 01

  Yeah, no, I would I would love that.

• 55:29Speaker 03

  A little bit of space.

• 55:31Speaker 01

  I would absolutely love that time.

• 55:34Speaker 03

  I imagine you've never gone, finally, I can breast breastfeed just before I go on, yes.

• 55:40Speaker 01

  I think that someday in the future, I I will have it again. But I I love those moments. I love the, because I do, I the mindless kind of, I've always thought there's a hard thing to explain about stand up. Where it doesn't look like you're doing anything and you aren't doing anything, but you are doing something.

• 55:59Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 55:59Speaker 01

  You're.

• 56:00Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 56:00Speaker 01

  You're getting your mind.

• 56:02Speaker 04

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 56:03Speaker 01

  Ready.

• 56:04Speaker 04

  I almost power down in that hour before.

• 56:07Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 56:07Speaker 04

  I I think people imagine you pacing, listening to.

• 56:10Speaker 03

  No, I find I have to get as quiet and empty headed as possible so that then I can go out and.

• 56:16Speaker 04

  But that's because yours, your stuff is quite empty headed too.

• 56:21Speaker 04

  You have to get in character.

• 56:23Speaker 01

  Information out of here.

• 56:25Speaker 03

  Let's get it all out there so I can engage with the comedy.

• 56:34Speaker 01

  Pink Pantheress here. Coach and Spotify are teaming up to bring music and style together and they want you to be part of it. Grab your friends and head to the Tabby Tour, hitting cities around the country with live performances from special artists, exclusive experiences and personalised products. And discover custom playlists on Spotify, booked just for you based on who you are and how you listen. Live your story with Coach. Learn more at coach.com.

• 57:02Speaker 01

  This episode is brought to you by State Farm. Football has a play for just about everything. You can go deep, keep it on the ground, or draw up something nobody sees coming. And whether you want to run a flea flicker or the tush push, you need a plan to fit your unique situation. That's why State Farm takes the time to get to know you, so they can help personalise coverage for your life and budget. Now that's a solid game plan. Like a good neighbour, State Farm is there.