Pod Insights My Therapist Ghosted Me MTGM EXTRA! "It's all WAY too vigorous..." About this episode How's it going for Joanne in Cape Town? How's the dating scene? Find out!
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Transcript 0:00 Speaker 00 Whether you're building a roster or a business, great talent can come from anywhere. Pebble helps companies hire and support employees across 185 plus countries. Pebble believes you don't build a winning team by limiting where you look for talent. That belief is at the heart of their new partnership with Bay FC and the way Pebble helps companies build their own teams every day. With Pebble, companies can hire in over 185 countries, bringing everything together in a single platform that integrates with the tools teams already use. The result is a global team that's actually set up to succeed with accurate pay, real benefits, and the support they need to thrive wherever they are. Bottom line, great teams can come from anywhere. Pebble helps companies build them. Special offer for podcast listeners. Pebble is normally $399 a month per employee.
0:45 Speaker 00 Already a no brainer for what you get. But right now, there's a limited time offer on their site that makes it even easier to get started. Go to hellopebble.com/sports before it's gone. That's hello, P E B L dot com slash sports. Terms and conditions apply.
1:02 Speaker 01 This is a Global Player original podcast.
1:11 Speaker 02 Hello, welcome to My Therapist Coasted Me. It is I, once again, Joanne McNally, with my co-host and confidante.
1:17 Speaker 03 Confidante. Hello, everybody, and Jo, as well.
1:26 Speaker 03 Go on, what's the news?
1:28 Speaker 02 Well, Vogue, the news, I don't even know how to defend it. I was gonna try and come up with something really, like, kind of moral or ethical or... I'm staying in Cape Town. I've extended my stay.
1:39 Speaker 03 Oh, Jo, how unexpected that Joanna's extended her stay. I would never have, I'd never have thought that.
1:46 Speaker 02 I've extended my stay. I cannot even listen to myself say, sure, I've got no kids anymore. I am sick of myself justifying my treat yourselves with the fact I've got no kids. I didn't even want to hear myself. Don't let me say, sure, I've got no kids anymore. Don't let me say it.
2:02 Speaker 03 God, Jo, she's on holidays again.
2:05 Speaker 02 I can't stop saying it. I feel like even if I had a family of five, I'd forgotten. I'm like, sure, God, I can't.
2:10 Speaker 04 I've just cancelled the studio bookings. We just won't do it in the studio anymore. It's fine. We can just do it online.
2:16 Speaker 03 It's too cold to go into studio. Anyway, I'm thrilled she's staying over there.
2:22 Speaker 02 It's 2025. We work remotely now, Jo, okay? I work from Cape Town. Cape Town. Cape Town.
2:31 Speaker 03 She lives in Cape Town.
2:32 Speaker 02 I've no accommodation.
2:34 Speaker 03 That doesn't, that doesn't matter.
2:36 Speaker 02 It's just me and 63 gay men. I'm staying.
2:40 Speaker 03 I mean, that is literally the dream life to live. Do you know what? Can I say one thing as well? Like, if you, you've already flown nine, nine hours out there. You may as well make the most of it. There's no point in coming back and then having to go back.
2:54 Speaker 02 Exactly. There's no point going back and then having to come back next year. Do you know what I mean? What's the point? Exactly. And luckily, I work for, I was gonna say myself, but Vogue, and Vogue is allowing me to stay.
3:08 Speaker 03 Joanne's gonna start speaking Afrikaans to us soon. She's just gonna literally turn into a local. I will be so turned on by you. If you come home and an South African accent, the floodgates will open.
3:19 Speaker 02 I have to say, it doesn't take much for your floodgates to open now from what I heard, but I have to say, I'm, and I'm, I told you, I'm on Hinge. I, I, I reset my, like, um, I've been operating out of Cape Town for, like, I've been here for a week, but I've been operating out of Hinge, Cape Town for three weeks now. And I look, do you know what, folk? Thanks for asking.
3:41 Speaker 03 Okay. We actually really wanna know, like, we're Chinese, well, you can search.
3:45 Speaker 02 Yeah. Hold on, I'll get my journal and read what's been happening. Do you know what, actually? Not Greece. Great, yeah.
3:54 Speaker 03 I thought there was loads of riots down there.
3:57 Speaker 02 Yeah, there are loads of riots, Vogue, but I'm not their bag. So I was, I wish I'd done a dating rap. Do you remember I was doing the dating raps?
4:06 Speaker 03 No, I'm not dating, so I don't know. I never see them.
4:09 Speaker 02 Joe, did you see these dating raps?
4:11 Speaker 03 I get served up fucking parenting advice. I don't get good things like dating raps.
4:15 Speaker 02 They're really funny.
4:16 Speaker 04 So like your Spotify rap, these were your top 10 songs you listened to and these are the top 10 lads.
4:20 Speaker 02 There you go. It's like, yeah, it's the summary of your dating, like, kind of.
4:25 Speaker 03 Oh, I like it.
4:26 Speaker 02 Yeah, it's really funny. It's really funny. So it's like number of hookups, number of, you know, blah, blah, blah. Um.
4:32 Speaker 03 I don't want to put you down or anything, but I just, I don't think you've, you were meant to be worldly for us and you haven't really, I mean, I'm sorry. You haven't done a great job. I'm sorry.
4:41 Speaker 02 I am, I am, Vogue, I, I am trying.
4:45 Speaker 03 It's like you've turned into a mermaid. Your legs are so close that they've stitched together.
4:50 Speaker 02 I am doing, I have three hours a day on that thing. I am doing a shit every morning on Hinge to try and get something out of this place.
4:58 Speaker 03 Have you been boosting yourself? Have you gone cheap and you're not boosting?
5:00 Speaker 02 I tried. I thought maybe because I was, I thought maybe because I was far and I wouldn't have to boost. I thought maybe there'd be an extra bit of pizzazz to me. But no, you're right. I'm gonna have to, I'm gonna have to, I'm gonna have to be, I'm boosting at 8pm tonight. I'll be boosting through the night, which means I won't sleep with the excitement. But I will tell you what happened.
5:19 Speaker 02 8am, me and 69 guys, I began through my set, my profile. So if I do dating rap, what I would say, do you know what I actually, I've realised? And I spoke to my friend about this and she was like, stop agreeing to do that. If I had to guess or estimate the amount of men who on Hinge ask me for my Instagram. They're like, oh, let's connect. Yeah, Vogue knows where this is going.
5:47 Speaker 03 Under no circumstances.
5:49 Speaker 02 There you go.
5:49 Speaker 03 Hands over the.
5:52 Speaker 02 I was, I was trying to be.
5:56 Speaker 03 I think it'd be worse to find out somebody was in prison or something and then you've got like, then like, just tell them that you're a serial killer. It will go down better than your Instagram.
6:12 Speaker 02 Yeah, I'm doing a livestream from Wandsworth Women's Prison. They're like, yeah, okay, whatever. But they find my actual Instagram, they're like, oh no.
6:20 Speaker 03 She's, she's real fucked up.
6:25 Speaker 03 I was trying to set Joanne up with this guy before that I know, and he was like, oh, is she on Instagram? I was like, hmm.
6:30 Speaker 02 No.
6:31 Speaker 03 No.
6:32 Speaker 02 Not for you.
6:33 Speaker 03 Pinocchio knows.
6:37 Speaker 02 What's the internet?
6:40 Speaker 03 In fairness, mine would be a bit off putting too, a bit thirsty and stuff, I thought. So I'm not sure, like, I don't think anyone's Instagram is that great, to be honest.
6:49 Speaker 02 Yeah, look, it's a bit much, it's a bit much, what I would say. It's like, it's a lot of access to someone's character before you've really seduced them with the fake thing that you're supposed to do. Okay, so.
6:59 Speaker 03 How can you hide who you are if they've got your Instagram?
7:03 Speaker 02 This is, this is the problem. And let's be real, my Instagram, the clips and stuff, like, it's, that's the worst probably ver- like, version. They're like, oh, can I look at your stand up? No.
7:16 Speaker 03 Oh, definitely not that.
7:18 Speaker 02 Yeah, so I was speaking to a friend of mine, and she was like, okay, she went through my, she was like, don't tell them, don't give them your Instagram. So basically what I was saying was, there's three men. Now, this is, Jo, three is a lot. Like, one, okay, fine. Two, nah. Three in the space of seven days.
7:35 Speaker 03 Because your Instagram.
7:37 Speaker 02 And me connecting IG. Jürgen. Peter. Someone else came over then.
7:43 Speaker 03 Peter, what age was Peter? 569.
7:48 Speaker 02 Peter's a bit hot, Peter's a bit hot. Jürgen's a bit hot, they're all a bit hot. Yeah, here's my Insta. Never to be heard again. Tumbleweed blown through my phone. So anyway, new plot. No one gets the details anymore. And I've changed my job to marketing.
8:05 Speaker 03 I have a great idea.
8:06 Speaker 02 I'll report back.
8:07 Speaker 03 Set up a new Instagram, right? Set up a new Instagram where you are a marketing girl.
8:13 Speaker 02 Yeah.
8:14 Speaker 03 And just do selfies and put some pictures of avocados and eggs and stuff.
8:17 Speaker 02 Ah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
8:18 Speaker 03 Chuck in the odd green juice for January 2025.
8:23 Speaker 02 Yeah, I actually, do you know what, folk? All joking aside, fucking, it's going that way.
8:28 Speaker 03 You don't actually have to even lie. You know those rotten ginger shots you always have? Pop one of them up. You love them.
8:33 Speaker 02 I love it. I love it. It's not even, do you know when you're like, they're intimidating? They're not. They're just, they're just like, ah, you're grand.
8:40 Speaker 03 People used to, people used to say that about me when I was like 16 and I'd be like this fucking alien walking along and they'd be like, they're just intimidated because you're tall. No. And I was like, I knew. When I look back now, I'm like, that's why they didn't go anywhere. I was a bitch.
8:54 Speaker 02 Vogue, I don't know if you were, look, I'm not gonna, I'm not gonna say that.
8:58 Speaker 03 Okay, I'm gonna just get the, I'll get the evidence, okay? I know you're trying to be nice because you're my friend and you'd never see a bad thing said about me, but.
9:05 Speaker 02 Vogue, you know I'm not nice to you because I'm your friend, but I really struggle with being nice to you. I don't want to do it.
9:13 Speaker 03 If she sends me a nice message, I'm like, are you okay?
9:16 Speaker 02 Yeah, that's the, now I've been abducted, there will be signs. Hey Vogue, how are you? Is there anything I can do for you today?
9:23 Speaker 02 She's been taken again. Get her.
9:26 Speaker 02 Ring pass. She's not okay. Anyway, my point is, I kinda thought I'd have a bit more traction and traffic over here. I haven't had much. I'll have to rejig the system. I don't know what to do.
9:38 Speaker 04 Thirst traps, Joanne. More thirst traps.
9:41 Speaker 02 I know. Do you know what, Jo? I know, I'm gonna have to, I know, yeah. I just, it doesn't come naturally to me, but you're right.
9:48 Speaker 03 Why don't you go into your kitchen?
9:50 Speaker 02 I'll go from posting an ice cream to like full fucking naked, like full frontal naked. With like a lollipop slipping down the inside of my legs. That's what I'll do. I'll have to.
10:01 Speaker 03 She's just gonna have ice. She'll have ice just rolling down her body.
10:08 Speaker 03 Stop wearing bras as well. Stop it.
10:11 Speaker 02 You're like, Joanne, the gimp mask is a bit much. Come on now, like, surely there's something else you can do. Put your fucking knickers on. Get out of the pill. I don't know what to do. It's not, it's doing nothing for my self-esteem. I can tell you that much.
10:23 Speaker 03 Well, I will tell you one thing. It's them, not you, right? That's how I feel about that. You've never looked better. You've never looked better. You look like great crack in your Instagram pictures.
10:31 Speaker 02 Thanks, Vogue. Do you know what though? We've said it before. Jo, you can confirm or deny, do men care about personality at all? Or is it just my personality that's the problem?
10:45 Speaker 02 There you go.
10:46 Speaker 04 That's a big one, isn't it?
10:46 Speaker 02 I'll pour a drink. Give me, give me 14 minutes because the glass will not be big enough.
10:52 Speaker 04 I think it definitely, of course it matters, of course.
10:55 Speaker 03 What's that?
10:56 Speaker 04 Because you've got to talk to someone at some point, haven't you?
10:59 Speaker 02 Yeah, yeah, yeah. But do they care? And also, what's holding me back, Jo? Do you think?
11:03 Speaker 03 I think that the men that you're choosing are the ones that don't have a great personality. To be honest, sorry, that is how it's all got to came out, but it's true. Nice fellas, nice fellas, just not much behind the eyes, you know?
11:16 Speaker 02 Hmm. Just a lot of whey and protein.
11:19 Speaker 03 Yes, yes.
11:21 Speaker 02 I know, I know.
11:24 Speaker 03 Joanne sees someone eating a protein bar and they could be an absolute pig and she's like, he's one.
11:28 Speaker 02 Ah, yeah. It's like the bang egg white off him, mwah.
11:33 Speaker 03 He's eating a fulfill bar, quick!
11:40 Speaker 02 Yeah.
11:40 Speaker 03 Noise of a blender turns her on.
11:46 Speaker 02 Where's that NutiBullet thing coming from? Someone's blending their grains in the little... I know. I don't know, I don't know what the solution is, really. It's getting weird now. It's getting weird, Jo.
11:57 Speaker 04 Find, are there any unhinged that like poetry? Find one that likes poetry.
12:01 Speaker 03 Jo, let's not go that come on, please.
12:04 Speaker 02 I don't hate myself.
12:05 Speaker 03 She doesn't like long walks.
12:08 Speaker 02 I don't, I can't be dealing with Christians, long walks or roast on a Sunday. Do you know what, folks? Do you know what I think would be a nice idea? If one of our bonus apps, do you know the advice that we give badly? Wouldn't it be nice, wouldn't it be nice if Jo did it one week?
12:21 Speaker 03 Yeah.
12:21 Speaker 02 Do you know, Jo, you have a male perspective that we don't use. Wouldn't it be nice for a change of scene if one of the bonus apps, when we do the emails, that you gave the advice?
12:32 Speaker 03 You know that this is a bonus app right now?
12:35 Speaker 02 Yeah, yeah, yeah. I see.
12:38 Speaker 03 Look how happy she is that she's just found out it's a bonus. She's like, yes!
12:44 Speaker 04 We're nearly done.
12:46 Speaker 02 I knew that, fellas.
12:50 Speaker 03 No wonder she's not going on.
12:53 Speaker 02 I thought it was on parenting hell. I was like...
13:08 Speaker 03 Girls, I'm Aunt Jo. Jo, we're putting you in this. I'm 29 and I've met a guy. Go me. I was in a long-term relationship of six years before this and it's been a long, exhausting road to find someone on the apps who wasn't a complete asswipe. I don't say asswipe enough. I'm gonna bring that back in.
13:26 Speaker 02 Let's get that back.
13:27 Speaker 03 Asswipe, we like. He's great to talk to. We've definitely got chemistry. Enough that he's stayed over a couple of times. Just one thing, when we get personal, it's all way too vigorous. Ooh.
13:37 Speaker 02 Ooh.
13:39 Speaker 03 In my relationship.
13:42 Speaker 03 In my relationship before, we discussed sex quite openly, but I'm not sure how to do that with a guy I've not known as long. How do you say in the kindest, least awkward way, can you stop riding me like you're trying to break open up in your ass?
14:00 Speaker 02 Oh no. Oh no. Oh dear.
14:06 Speaker 03 Okay, I'll finish reading it and then we'll talk.
14:08 Speaker 02 Okay.
14:09 Speaker 03 I'm not sure whether to bring it up during sex, after sex, or when we're nowhere near a sexual situation, like at a dinner or something. Oh god, no, no!
14:18 Speaker 03 Why don't you bring it up when you meet his parents?
14:21 Speaker 02 Yeah.
14:23 Speaker 03 I'm not, I'm not being a shrinking violet and I'm enough of a feminist to be able to communicate what I like sexually, but I feel like it might be hard for him to hear because I get the feeling he thinks he's a fantastic ride. I don't want to puncture his ego or make it awkward. Please, now you know what you think. Anon. Oh my god.
14:39 Speaker 02 Many thoughts.
14:40 Speaker 03 Many thoughts. What will sort this out in one evening is, I would say, four tequilas. Four tequilas. You have to have a few drinks. You have got to have a few drinks and then you turn into that sexy bitch and then you just say, listen, oh, let's do it this way, let's do it that way. Because whenever you start having sex or something, they're not necessarily gonna be amazing straight on.
15:04 Speaker 02 Firstly, talking about sex with someone, you know, it's kind of necessary, bit spare. Once you get going, it's grand. But also, you can stay, you can say stuff in the moment that is, it's easier to do it. If you sit them down and like, listen, can I talk to you about sex? It kind of adds more weight than it maybe needs. Just when you're riding, be like, slow down!
15:26 Speaker 03 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
15:28 Speaker 02 I, yeah, slow, slow down there, will you? I, I actually like it slow. I like it slow. Slow, slow, slow. Like you just, sometimes you can say, just get it out of the way in the middle of the ride. So then he just.
15:38 Speaker 03 Has to be in the middle of the ride.
15:39 Speaker 02 Just make it a throwaway comment instead of like a sit down conversation.
15:44 Speaker 03 Joe, when all, Joe, when all your girlfriends said that to you, like, what did you say?
15:48 Speaker 04 I don't feel like this is the one that I should weigh in on.
15:50 Speaker 02 You're a speedy man, I can tell. I can see that, Joe. He's busy. He's a busy man.
15:56 Speaker 03 He's a bloody carousel bunny. Wham bam. Thank you.
15:59 Speaker 02 Bad sex is, it's just the worst. I know, but do you know what? It's no one's fault. It's not, he's not a bad ride. It's just, they just need to talk sadly.
16:09 Speaker 03 You need to, you need to sync up. That's it. You just need to sync up, talk and like try different things together. And once you start doing that, like it will become so much easier. But I think what you said, just a little throwaway comment.
16:21 Speaker 02 Yeah, slow down, slow down. Yeah, slow it down and, and bring me the nunchucks. Just throw in all the weird shit during the ride.
16:28 Speaker 03 Yeah, yeah, just calm.
16:31 Speaker 02 Yeah, instead of kind of sitting them down. That's what I think.
16:35 Speaker 03 Yeah.
16:36 Speaker 02 Do you know what? Sex is, so I was seeing this lad during the summer and he was like a rider, like he was riding everyone. Like he's a bit of a man of time.
16:45 Speaker 03 A rider, a rider, a man of the worst.
16:48 Speaker 02 Mad into the worst, he's an equestrian, professional. And it was just a funny one. It was just weird. You're not compatible, compatible with everyone. That's the key. Once you start giving it loads of communication, if you don't know them that well, it can get a bit heavy.
17:03 Speaker 03 Yeah.
17:04 Speaker 02 Throw it away.
17:06 Speaker 03 I totally agree, totally agree.
17:09 Speaker 02 Look, do you ever see, obviously I haven't spoken about sex in the city in a while, so I'm going to throw it in here. Do you remember the episode where Samantha was like? Talking this guy through having sex with her.
17:20 Speaker 03 Yeah.
17:20 Speaker 02 And it was, and she was like, giving him kind of blow by blow directions. I mean, do it. Why not? There's no point. Haping, haping on the receiving end of a lad riding you and you get nothing out of it. It's so rude. It's so rude.
17:35 Speaker 03 You can't spend your life, yeah, you can't spend your life thinking that either. And you obviously really like him for loads of other ways. And this is the easiest way to, like this out of all things, like if he was like really embarrassing in front of your friends and telling really shit jokes, that'd be really bad to have to deal with. And if you're only dealing with this, easily.
17:51 Speaker 02 At the same time though, do you know, and you're like, it's horrible when you have a sexual encounter with the guy and you're like, wow, I'm literally a wank sleeve.
17:58 Speaker 03 Oh, oh.
17:59 Speaker 02 I'm, I'm getting nothing out of this. I'm getting nothing here. It's horrible when you're, when you have that realisation, you're like, this, I didn't even like that. Like what, what am I? What is this? Why do you care?
18:10 Speaker 03 Still, you're like, did that happen? Is it done? Is that, sorry, what? Like you're literally like.
18:15 Speaker 02 Dissociating just to make it pass quicker. I know. It's awful. It's awful. So yeah, that would be our advice. Once again, give, what's the word? That's it. Communication, but quick, sharp and not heavy.
18:31 Speaker 03 Not heavy.
18:32 Speaker 02 Slow it right. When you said have a couple of tequilas, I thought you meant kind of spike them to slow them down. That's a great advice, like.
18:39 Speaker 03 Couple of tequilas, a couple of Xanax. He won't be, he'll be going very, he's like a little snail. Joking, joking, because I can see.
18:46 Speaker 02 In a cat and a dog would slow him right down.
18:49 Speaker 03 Do you want, that's actually the best advice you've ever given on the pod. Well done. Thank you.
18:53 Speaker 02 Yeah. Get his mates over, ask him to hold his legs back as he goes. There's loads of options.
19:01 Speaker 03 Well, that's it. As always, we've really enjoyed giving you advice. If you'd like Joe to get involved, maybe something of less of a sexual nature, he feels uncomfortable around the sex.
19:09 Speaker 02 He does. But Joe, do you know what though? Don't look, what would you, Joe, okay. What would you say to that girl? You being a man who I'm sure has been enthusiastic at times, no shade.
19:19 Speaker 04 I think most men are more open to direction than you think they are.
19:23 Speaker 03 Yeah, yeah.
19:24 Speaker 02 Oh, yeah.
19:25 Speaker 04 They like to know what's good because we all just wanna be better.
19:29 Speaker 02 Yeah, a hundred percent. And then if that guy doesn't listen and doesn't take it on board, then, you know, that's a different conversation, but give him the information.
19:38 Speaker 02 I tell that to a guy once. I was like, I like a bit of chat during sex. And he's like, oh, okay. And then continued to ride me in complete silence for three more weeks. They listened, I can tell.
19:46 Speaker 03 Well, that worked out really well. Well, that's what she is.
19:49 Speaker 02 You could, you could hear a bit of this.
19:55 Speaker 02 Oh, God. Anyway, listen, I can't stay. I'm in Cape Town. I gotta go.
20:00 Speaker 03 Sorry, you thought we were on a full episode. I actually just want to tell you one thing that my friend told me the other day because she was listening to the pod. Remember I was going on a bit of Mice and Men? I was like, I'm gonna read it. I'm gonna read it. I'm gonna read it. Supposedly we studied it in third year and I just have no recollection. I just said, I've read it.
20:15 Speaker 02 That just goes to show, that just goes to show how problematic the education system is. Like, well, actually, no, sorry. That just goes to show about your memory is, I guess. I shouldn't blame the entire education system. But there is stuff that I, again, have been exposed to in school that I could not tell you anything about. One being the Irish language. Two being, two being maths. Anyway.
20:36 Speaker 03 Right. Well, that's it. Everyone, thank you so much.
20:38 Speaker 02 I've got a bit of something else to say.
20:40 Speaker 03 Okay, goodbye, everyone. We're going. We're leaving right now.
20:43 Speaker 04 We're back on tomorrow for the Friday.
20:45 Speaker 02 I might just stay online.
20:46 Speaker 03 Just stay online till tomorrow. Boost away. Be online. Leave your thoughts.
20:50 Speaker 02 Do you know what? I'll boost through the night and then I'll bring my, what I've won.
20:55 Speaker 03 Fantastic.
20:56 Speaker 02 Like a cat with a mouse in its mouth. I'll come back tomorrow and give the deets.
21:00 Speaker 03 Bye, everybody.
21:20 Speaker 00 Whether you're building a roster or a business, great talent can come from anywhere. Pebble helps companies hire and support employees across 185 plus countries. Pebble believes you don't build a winning team by limiting where you look for talent. That belief is at the heart of their new partnership with Bay FC and the way Pebble helps companies build their own teams every day. With Pebble, companies can hire in over 185 countries, bringing everything together in a single platform that integrates with the Tools teams already use. The result is a global team that's actually set up to succeed with accurate pay, real benefits, and the support they need to thrive wherever they are. Bottom line, great teams can come from anywhere. Pebble helps companies build them. Special offer for podcast listeners. Pebble is normally $399 a month per employee.
22:06 Speaker 00 Already a no brainer for what you get. But right now, there's a limited time offer on their site that makes it even easier to get started. Go to hellopebble.com/sports before it's gone. That's hello, P-E-B-L dot com slash sports. Terms and conditions apply.
Previous Cape Town, Petty Neighbours & The Alps Next TikTok Trolls, 'Queueing' & Feet Page updated November 5, 2026 · transcript and summary are machine-generated