Celia Imrie Nearly Got ARRESTED for WHAT?!

Celia Imrie enters the office and reunites with her Celebrity Traitors co-star Joe - and the pair waste absolutely no time picking up where they left off. Celia’s sense of adventure takes centre stage as she reflects on a life of travelling the world, trying new things and getting herself into the occasional spot of bother. And there's one particular escapade that leaves Joe and Jake stunned... But just how adventurous is she, really? Jake puts Joe and Celia to the test in a seriously fiery final challenge. Can either of them handle the heat? Featuring Joe Marler (@joemarler17) and Jake Bhardwaj (@jakebhardwajtv) Follow the show on Instagram: @willseeyounowshow Joe Marler Will See You Now is a Platform Media production. GET TICKETS TO THE LIVE TOUR HERE: https://www.livenation.co.uk/joe-marler-will-see-you-live-tickets-adp1647830 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Speaker 00

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• 0:56Jake Bhardwaj?

  This episode is brought to you by Tesco Kitchen. The YouTube series where big personalities and actually useful cooking tips come together. I was invited to join the brilliant Greg James and Seema Pankarnia for a bit of cooking chaos and an attempt at making the world's best kebabs. There were laughs, there was lamb, there were some genuinely brilliant tips, but most importantly, the kids actually approved.

• 1:18Speaker 03

  And it's not just Joe. Tesco Kitchen has had some brilliant guests through the doors, including Ed Gamble, Phil Wang and Bella Mackey.

• 1:25Jake Bhardwaj?

  Head over to Tesco Kitchen YouTube channel after this podcast.

• 1:30Speaker 03

  Very exciting guest, your mate, Celia Imrie.

• 1:34Jake Bhardwaj?

  Bit weird that we can call her my mate.

• 1:36Speaker 03

  That's what Traitors does, mate, brings people together.

• 1:38Jake Bhardwaj?

  Yeah, and also pushes them apart, that's sort of the game, but...

• 1:41Speaker 03

  She's a legend, isn't she? Acting legend. The Borrowers she's been in.

• 1:45Jake Bhardwaj?

  Great film.

• 1:46Speaker 03

  She was in Dinner Ladies, a sitcom.

• 1:48Jake Bhardwaj?

  Dinner Ladies, Marigold Hotel.

• 1:50Speaker 03

  One and two.

• 1:51Jake Bhardwaj?

  What about...

• 1:52Speaker 03

  Calendar Girls.

• 1:53Jake Bhardwaj?

  What's that about?

• 1:55Speaker 03

  Bunch of women, I think they raise money with a naked calendar and just sort of cover the bits with, I don't know, like buns and cakes and things like that.

• 2:04Jake Bhardwaj?

  Well, they don't eat it.

• 2:06Speaker 03

  Don't think they eat it, no. Although I think if me and you were faced with a couple of buns in front of us, probably have a little lick of the icing, wouldn't we? But I think they don't, they don't, they don't touch it, yeah. Shall we, shall we get her in?

• 2:20Jake Bhardwaj?

  Yeah. Do you want a cup of tea before we get started?

• 2:23Speaker 03

  Yeah, why don't you, give it five, it's a little bit chilly actually, might get like a jacket or something.

• 2:31Jake Bhardwaj?

  Janet, could you just hold Celia Imrie just for five minutes? We've just got to finish up in here. Yeah, let her in in five. Okay, thank you.

• 2:44Speaker 03

  All right, let's do this.

• 2:48Jake Bhardwaj?

  What are you staring at?

• 2:49Speaker 03

  Nothing.

• 2:52Jake Bhardwaj?

  Want some?

• 2:53Speaker 03

  I've lost my appetite.

• 3:02Jake Bhardwaj?

  Janet, could you just hold Celia Imrie just for five minutes? We've just got to finish up in here. Yeah, let her in in five. Okay, thank you.

• 3:14Speaker 03

  All right, let's do this.

• 3:18Jake Bhardwaj?

  What are you staring at?

• 3:19Speaker 03

  Nothing.

• 3:22Jake Bhardwaj?

  Want some?

• 3:23Speaker 03

  I've lost my appetite.

• 3:30Jake Bhardwaj?

  Celia Imrie, everybody!

• 3:36Speaker 04

  Are we allowed to hug? What happens?

• 3:38Jake Bhardwaj?

  How would you like to engage?

• 3:40Speaker 04

  I always want to hug you.

• 3:41Jake Bhardwaj?

  Oh, yes.

• 3:42Speaker 04

  Yes, please.

• 3:44Speaker 04

  Thank you. Janet said that I looked as if I needed an orange juice, so she said I could bring it in.

• 3:50Jake Bhardwaj?

  Okay, you're our first orange juice.

• 3:52Speaker 03

  She's never offered anyone juice before.

• 3:53Jake Bhardwaj?

  She's never done that.

• 3:54Speaker 04

  Well, it turns out that we used to do Scottish dancing together, me and Janet.

• 4:00Jake Bhardwaj?

  Really?

• 4:00Speaker 04

  Yes, and so I was just thrilled to see her because I haven't seen her for a Yonks.

• 4:04Jake Bhardwaj?

  Right.

• 4:05Speaker 04

  So anyway, why are you laughing?

• 4:07Jake Bhardwaj?

  Scottish dancing?

• 4:08Speaker 04

  Yes, well, I'm half Scots anyway.

• 4:10Speaker 03

  But she's Bangladeshi, that's very strange.

• 4:16Speaker 03

  Interesting, isn't it?

• 4:20Speaker 04

  Cheers. Now, the thing is, what I love about you is, Joe, the minute you see me, you start laughing.

• 4:28Jake Bhardwaj?

  I can't help it.

• 4:28Speaker 04

  What's happening?

• 4:29Jake Bhardwaj?

  This feels exactly like when we first met.

• 4:32Speaker 04

  When we first met.

• 4:33Jake Bhardwaj?

  I got all giddy, got in that Land Rover and they said, "Someone's going to get in next to you."

• 4:39Speaker 04

  You didn't know who.

• 4:40Jake Bhardwaj?

  "Don't speak to them, you don't know who they are." I went, "What do you mean, don't speak to them? That's so rude." Just don't speak to them till the cameras roll. And so I was sat in there like this.

• 4:49Speaker 04

  You were.

• 4:50Jake Bhardwaj?

  And then I heard the dog go.

• 4:51Speaker 04

  Yeah, but you were laughing already and I don't just got in.

• 4:54Jake Bhardwaj?

  I was so nervous, I was giggling.

• 4:56Speaker 04

  But you didn't know who it was.

• 4:57Jake Bhardwaj?

  No, and then you start, and then I kept it because I was still nervous and then I looked around.

• 5:01Speaker 04

  So why are you laughing?

• 5:02Jake Bhardwaj?

  And you were like...

• 5:06Jake Bhardwaj?

  And I was like...

• 5:06Speaker 04

  Celia Imrie.

• 5:10Jake Bhardwaj?

  I was so giddy and I feel exactly the same now.

• 5:13Speaker 04

  Me too, you.

• 5:13Jake Bhardwaj?

  How are you? We haven't actually seen each other since.

• 5:16Speaker 04

  No, except I suppose when we saw the...

• 5:19Jake Bhardwaj?

  The final.

• 5:20Speaker 04

  The final one.

• 5:20Jake Bhardwaj?

  We did the final viewing. Yeah, but everyone was like here, there and everywhere, weren't they? This is Jake, my research assistant.

• 5:27Speaker 04

  Hello, Jake.

• 5:27Speaker 03

  So nice to meet you.

• 5:28Speaker 04

  And you.

• 5:29Speaker 03

  So nice to meet someone who I think knows a very different side of Joe than we do, actually.

• 5:33Speaker 04

  Well, you see, what do you know?

• 5:36Speaker 03

  What?

• 5:37Speaker 04

  No, because he's just a total delight from beginning to end, but never stops laughing. And actually, you know, that's so good in life because it's the... Now, if you're talking about medical things, because I'm supposed to be Dr. Joe Mala, would you not say that laughter is the best cure?

• 5:57Jake Bhardwaj?

  Oh, yes.

• 5:57Speaker 04

  For everything?

• 5:59Jake Bhardwaj?

  Well, I don't, I don't know.

• 6:01Speaker 03

  I think for diabetics, insulin's still the go-to, isn't it? But other than that, generally speaking, definitely, yeah.

• 6:07Jake Bhardwaj?

  I'm going to start with an intake questionnaire, my sweet, sweet Celia.

• 6:11Speaker 04

  Go on.

• 6:11Jake Bhardwaj?

  Just to try and establish a route for us to go down today. Right, full name?

• 6:17Speaker 04

  Celia Diana Saville Imrie.

• 6:20Jake Bhardwaj?

  Gorgeous. That's four names. Star sign?

• 6:25Speaker 04

  Cancer. Are you? No. Why are you looking like that?

• 6:29Speaker 03

  We're both cancers.

• 6:31Speaker 04

  Who? You and me?

• 6:32Speaker 03

  Joe and I and you, all three of us.

• 6:34Speaker 04

  Now, how did we not work that out before?

• 6:36Jake Bhardwaj?

  This is the trifecta of cancer. Uh, occupation?

• 6:40Speaker 04

  Actress and writer.

• 6:43Jake Bhardwaj?

  Oh, good. Craziest thing you've had to learn for an acting role?

• 6:51Speaker 04

  Well, one of my most recent ones was some trapeze lessons because I played a character called Mimi in a film called Love Sarah and she belonged to the circus. So I went and had two trapeze lessons. That was quite good.

• 7:10Jake Bhardwaj?

  Actual trapeze?

• 7:11Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 7:11Jake Bhardwaj?

  Did it scare you?

• 7:14Jake Bhardwaj?

  Okay, name something that does scare you.

• 7:16Speaker 04

  Actually, I don't like heights, believe it or not, so somehow I managed to get over that one.

• 7:22Jake Bhardwaj?

  Did you do the trapeze artistry on the floor?

• 7:26Speaker 04

  No, but not very high up.

• 7:28Jake Bhardwaj?

  Right, okay.

• 7:28Speaker 04

  But you know that bridge that we had to do, that you were so good at?

• 7:33Jake Bhardwaj?

  It's yours.

• 7:33Speaker 04

  Because you did a sort of dance on yours.

• 7:36Speaker 03

  You were so graceful on that, Joe.

• 7:37Jake Bhardwaj?

  I was very, I was struggling.

• 7:39Speaker 04

  No, but you know, we were all impersonating you on the floor because you were sort of forward and back and da-da-da-da.

• 7:45Jake Bhardwaj?

  Impersonating, mocking, either or.

• 7:46Speaker 04

  No, no, no. But no, I could not have done that.

• 7:49Jake Bhardwaj?

  No, but I think actually...

• 7:51Speaker 04

  That really did scare me.

• 7:52Jake Bhardwaj?

  I was worried, I was going to be worse at it than I was, but because of how heavy I was, it actually made the bridge go lower to the ground. So I was happier, do you know what I mean? Because I was scared of the heights, but because of my weight, it just brought it down. Other than trapeze artistry, which I think is the sentence, what's something you're surprisingly good at?

• 8:12Speaker 04

  Oh, gosh, I should have thought of this before, shouldn't I?

• 8:16Jake Bhardwaj?

  Well, no, you didn't know the question.

• 8:18Speaker 04

  I didn't know the question.

• 8:20Jake Bhardwaj?

  Surprisingly good at. What are you good at?

• 8:25Jake Bhardwaj?

  I'm so sorry, that came out.

• 8:27Speaker 04

  What are you good at?

• 8:28Speaker 03

  As a doctor, your bedside manner isn't brilliant, is it? What are you good at?

• 8:33Jake Bhardwaj?

  That is not how I meant it to come out, you dick.

• 8:36Speaker 04

  No, no, no, I thought it was rather well put, actually, because actually, what are you doing here altogether? Well, I like, I suppose I like taking on the guise of someone else. My obsession at the moment is documentaries because I love watching people's body language. I mean, obviously that came up in Traitors and everything, you know, and watching criminals who you know have done bad things, trying to get out of it. So maybe I'm quite good at spotting that sort of thing.

• 9:13Jake Bhardwaj?

  What's something you're shit at?

• 9:16Speaker 04

  Cooking. Really not good at all.

• 9:18Jake Bhardwaj?

  No cooking?

• 9:19Speaker 04

  Well, poor Angus, my son, I think I only cooked one thing, pasta, tomato sauce and cheese, but garlic as well.

• 9:29Jake Bhardwaj?

  Garlic?

• 9:30Speaker 04

  No, no, no, but when I heard him coming back from school, I put garlic into a saucepan and the aroma smelt better than the taste, probably. You know what I mean? But it's true. But poor boy, I mean, honestly, he now, of course, is a very good cook, but I'm not good.

• 9:47Jake Bhardwaj?

  I'm just picturing you going, "Oh, he'll be home in a minute."

• 9:50Speaker 04

  Yeah, quick, get the garlic on.

• 9:51Jake Bhardwaj?

  Why don't you just fry a bit of garlic and it'll smell like I'm actually cooking something half decent?

• 9:56Speaker 04

  But there you are, that's exactly what happened.

• 9:58Jake Bhardwaj?

  And then he gets served another bowl of pasta and tomato sauce?

• 10:00Speaker 04

  Yeah, I mean, never mind.

• 10:01Jake Bhardwaj?

  And he goes, "Where's the garlic?"

• 10:02Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 10:02Jake Bhardwaj?

  Well, that was just, that was just for the aroma.

• 10:05Speaker 04

  It's already in it, but actually I can do a fine, a chocolate cake. That's okay.

• 10:10Jake Bhardwaj?

  Okay.

• 10:10Speaker 04

  And that's about it.

• 10:11Jake Bhardwaj?

  If you could go on an adventure anywhere around the world, which Traitors castmates would you take with you?

• 10:19Speaker 04

  You.

• 10:19Jake Bhardwaj?

  You're not allowed to take me. Can't swim, can't fly, claustrophobic, really bad hygiene.

• 10:26Speaker 04

  You're a liar. Honestly, that's not true.

• 10:29Jake Bhardwaj?

  You have to take someone else.

• 10:30Speaker 04

  Well, Paloma and I, I think, would have quite good fun and I think Nick and I would have very good fun.

• 10:36Jake Bhardwaj?

  Would you rather be scared to death or bored to death?

• 10:40Speaker 04

  Scared to death.

• 10:42Jake Bhardwaj?

  Really? Because it's more fun?

• 10:46Speaker 04

  And it might be over.

• 10:48Speaker 04

  You know, it'll be, something will be ghastly for a little, little while and then you're over it. Bored goes on forever, no thanks.

• 10:58Jake Bhardwaj?

  I agree, I'm with you.

• 10:59Speaker 04

  I'm not really behaving properly like a patient and a doctor. Has that sort of gone out of the window?

• 11:07Jake Bhardwaj?

  Pardon?

• 11:07Speaker 04

  You know what I mean, so...

• 11:08Jake Bhardwaj?

  Are you saying I'm not behaving like a doctor in your eyes?

• 11:11Speaker 04

  Well, you're too nice. I mean, you know, we're not very formal, are we? But I like that.

• 11:16Jake Bhardwaj?

  Well, Miss Celia, I tend to disagree with you. And finally, do you consent to being analysed by someone who's not a real doctor?

• 11:24Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 11:29Jake Bhardwaj?

  Here's what I think we should focus on today. You know, this is a mix of the research that we've done on you and some of the answers you've just given us. I think you've got quite an unusual relationship with danger.

• 11:41Speaker 04

  Mm-hmm.

• 11:42Jake Bhardwaj?

  That last question where you'd rather be scared to death than bored to death, really sort of red flagged for me.

• 11:46Speaker 04

  Mm-hmm.

• 11:47Jake Bhardwaj?

  Here's a list of a few of the things that you've done, which again, give me that assessment. Trapeze, canoeing, travelling continents by train, celebrity traitors, and of course, getting your kit off for Calendar Girls.

• 11:59Speaker 04

  Exactly. That's quite daring, all of that, isn't it?

• 12:02Jake Bhardwaj?

  I would say you present as one thing and you are very much another.

• 12:09Speaker 04

  Well.

• 12:09Jake Bhardwaj?

  In the best of ways.

• 12:11Speaker 04

  I mean, all those things, I did have to sort of cross my fingers and jump in. Because the thing is, like with Calendar Girls, I mean, I don't like taking my clothes off in front of myself, let alone anybody else. But if I'd got there on the day that we had to do it and then said, oh no, I don't want... Hopeless. You have to, if you're gonna do it, do it. Just get on with it.

• 12:37Jake Bhardwaj?

  Yeah, you, most people just like run from danger. They're like, oh, get away from it. You seem to like head straight towards it, as if like it's been signposted and you go, I fancy that.

• 12:48Speaker 04

  I think the thing is that I've just got to make the most of every day.

• 12:53Jake Bhardwaj?

  I want to understand why you keep walking towards the things that scare you. And find out if you have a limit to your sense of adventure, or is it just infinite?

• 13:03Speaker 04

  No, I think, I think from now on, it's, it's to the end. I want to make the most of every single day, every moment.

• 13:10Jake Bhardwaj?

  Okay.

• 13:11Speaker 04

  Because actually, you, because you know what our life is like. You don't know where it's going. I've no idea what I'm gonna be doing next. And it's very up and down, up and down. So it's not all up, but while it is, make the most of it. Don't you think?

• 13:30Jake Bhardwaj?

  It's funny.

• 13:30Speaker 04

  Because you know, there are some down bits as well. We all know that.

• 13:33Jake Bhardwaj?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 13:35Speaker 04

  Don't be so ridiculous.

• 13:36Jake Bhardwaj?

  I love her, I love her even more.

• 13:42Jake Bhardwaj?

  Where does that appetite for wanting to try new things come from? Growing up, was it encouraged at home, or did you just go, this is my nature, I'm going out, I want to try everything?

• 13:51Speaker 04

  No, because I think, I'm one of five, number four out of five. So I wasn't the eldest, I wasn't the youngest, I wasn't the only boy. And so I did an awful lot of, hello, by the way, hello. Which often happens with actors and actresses, if you, if you ask them. And so, you know, I just wanted to make, make my mark, I suppose. I'm still, I'm still trying to prove something to someone. I don't know what. So I'm not gonna stop. I like the idea of being, doing something that I think I can't do.

• 14:26Jake Bhardwaj?

  Hmm.

• 14:28Speaker 04

  And challenge myself.

• 14:29Jake Bhardwaj?

  Does that still come? Because you've said before that before every first night, you still have, you've been doing it for...

• 14:37Speaker 04

  A long time.

• 14:38Jake Bhardwaj?

  Your very experience. That was better, wasn't it?

• 14:40Speaker 03

  Yeah, much better.

• 14:41Speaker 04

  And sort of very old.

• 14:42Jake Bhardwaj?

  Thank you. Didn't say that. And I would never say that.

• 14:44Speaker 04

  No, no, no.

• 14:45Jake Bhardwaj?

  Not to you, or your face.

• 14:47Speaker 04

  Good.

• 14:49Speaker 03

  But when you leave.

• 14:50Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 14:51Jake Bhardwaj?

  You're very, like, you've been doing this time and time again, and yet you still have that first night fear.

• 14:57Speaker 04

  Yes, but Joe, you ask any actor or actress, we all do. And actually, there is a moment on the first preview, which I find most frightening, because that's the first time in front of an audience. And I'm standing backstage and I actually think my heart is gonna fall out of my costume onto the floor. I think I'm going to die of fright. I honestly do. And I don't know what happens. And then you think, at that moment, you think, actually, what are you doing? Why are you there? You know you hate this bit. Mind you, when you get to the end and you have a glass of champagne, that's heaven. That's worth it all.

• 15:39Jake Bhardwaj?

  Do you think having that feeling

• 15:41Speaker 04

  Hmm.

• 15:43Jake Bhardwaj?

  Is, is what drives you? You're like, that's your passion, that's your... And when you don't have that feeling, that's the, that's the moment where you go, I shouldn't be doing this. Because it doesn't scare me or excite me, but do you know what I mean?

• 15:54Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 15:55Jake Bhardwaj?

  If it was just flat and you were like, yeah, you're like, well, I've lost the passion for it then.

• 15:58Speaker 04

  Yeah. I don't, I don't think I ever will. But also, you, you can help yourself by saying things like, the nerves are a flip side of excitement. Because that has to be true as well.

• 16:10Jake Bhardwaj?

  I hope so. That's what I get when...

• 16:13Speaker 03

  Yeah, it's a really comforting thing when the first time someone said that to me, all the symptoms of being nervous are the same as being excited. You can sort of flip it in your head.

• 16:20Speaker 04

  It does help, doesn't it?

• 16:21Speaker 03

  It's really lovely, yeah.

• 16:21Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 16:21Jake Bhardwaj?

  Whether you can control it or not and let the, the flight take over.

• 16:26Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 16:26Jake Bhardwaj?

  As opposed to the fight.

• 16:28Speaker 04

  Do you still get excited to do this?

• 16:30Jake Bhardwaj?

  Oh, yeah. But I get that exact same feeling. Before you came in the room, I was like, oh, I was hoovering. I was trying to keep myself busy. I didn't know what to do.

• 16:38Speaker 03

  We were dancing to music.

• 16:40Jake Bhardwaj?

  I wasn't dancing.

• 16:42Speaker 03

  We were, you were dancing. You were hoovering, dancing to Queen, Freddie Mercury.

• 16:45Jake Bhardwaj?

  Well, yeah, because they hoover. I want to break free. Sorry. And then I got all like nervous and I was like, right, Celia's downstairs. And then I was like, what do I do? And I was like, right, I can say hello, I don't know. And then... I still get it, but then I have that fight in my head of, I could either leg it, because you can, you let people down and leg it, or you stay and go, well, we could have fun and it could be exciting.

• 17:10Speaker 04

  Exactly.

• 17:10Jake Bhardwaj?

  The patient that comes in could not take me seriously one iota. Really, really good.

• 17:15Speaker 03

  Does the feeling, people talk about that, they go on stage and then suddenly there's that feeling of peace and calm and you're in it? Or do, or do you still feel that on the first night throughout the performance?

• 17:24Speaker 04

  Yes, but by that time, hopefully you've become someone else.

• 17:27Speaker 03

  Hmm.

• 17:28Speaker 04

  And that, and that someone else isn't nervous. They're just having their day. So you have to sort of talk yourself through these, these moments of, no, this person is just in their, having their normal life. And it's just literally being a switch and becoming somebody else. That, that helps.

• 17:49Jake Bhardwaj?

  Why do you enjoy being other people then?

• 17:52Speaker 04

  Um, because it's more interesting. And the whole thing of switching. Although, it's quite interesting because in Traitors, for instance...

• 18:07Jake Bhardwaj?

  I was just about to say, were you someone else in there then?

• 18:10Speaker 04

  I promise you, I wasn't. And it's the first time ever. I've never done a reality thing before. And I didn't, you know, I didn't have a part to play. I was just, which is quite sort of exposing in a way.

• 18:28Jake Bhardwaj?

  But did that like, really scare you then? Because you, you've mentioned how many times that you enjoy playing other people.

• 18:36Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 18:36Jake Bhardwaj?

  And yet you were being asked to just go in and play a game as yourself in there. Were you worried that it would be too exposing?

• 18:45Speaker 04

  I, it's weird. It just, I think it's all your fault actually, Joe, because the minute I got in the car, you made it be all right. Because you laughed. No, because you laughed at me. I don't know. I can't explain it. But I think very quickly, I just thought, well, we're here now.

• 19:03Jake Bhardwaj?

  Yeah.

• 19:04Speaker 04

  I'm so glad we did it.

• 19:05Jake Bhardwaj?

  I laughed so hard at Pussy in the Well.

• 19:09Speaker 04

  I don't know why you thought it was so funny.

• 19:11Jake Bhardwaj?

  But because I hadn't heard that famous...

• 19:15Speaker 04

  Pussy in the Well?

• 19:16Jake Bhardwaj?

  Rhyme. What is the famous rhyme? Can you type in Pussy in the Well?

• 19:21Speaker 03

  I can do, but I may get restricted on this internet.

• 19:24Speaker 04

  Why? Because it's pornographic. Ding dong, pussy in the, what is it?

• 19:28Speaker 03

  Ding dong, pussies in the well. Who put her in? Little Johnny Flynn.

• 19:33Jake Bhardwaj?

  It wasn't just that.

• 19:34Speaker 04

  What?

• 19:35Jake Bhardwaj?

  Like you set me, you made me laugh. You made me and Joe D W laugh so hard.

• 19:39Speaker 04

  Oh, good.

• 19:40Jake Bhardwaj?

  It wasn't just that. It was then when we had to shout, we had to sing the screams down the well.

• 19:45Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 19:46Jake Bhardwaj?

  And you told Kat, the singer, you told Kat, the singer, that's her job.

• 19:51Speaker 04

  I know.

• 19:51Jake Bhardwaj?

  You went, Kat, no, no, no, I'll do it.

• 19:55Jake Bhardwaj?

  That's cancerous.

• 19:57Speaker 04

  But you see, but Joe, I didn't know Kat. I had never met her before. I didn't know she was a singer. But even so, I thought I was very bossy.

• 20:06Jake Bhardwaj?

  Yes. And then you, the way you wailed down that well, and I honestly couldn't breathe. I was like, I'm useless here. I was on my hands and knees because you made me laugh so hard. And you continued to do that. It was unbelievable.

• 20:18Speaker 04

  But I had no idea she was a singer.

• 20:21Jake Bhardwaj?

  She's never forgiven you.

• 20:22Speaker 04

  No.

• 20:22Jake Bhardwaj?

  I did see a little recap, actually. You know, when you left, you accused me of being a traitor.

• 20:29Speaker 04

  Oh, Joe, I saw that again. I, I don't know.

• 20:33Jake Bhardwaj?

  The clip came up and loads of you did, actually.

• 20:36Speaker 04

  I was surprised at myself, actually, when I saw that back. I thought, that's so mean.

• 20:41Jake Bhardwaj?

  It broke my heart. I thought it really...

• 20:43Speaker 04

  But then you stuck up for me at breakfast. Because when I knew I'd been murdered, I thought, well, I hope they bloody well miss me at breakfast. And you did.

• 20:52Jake Bhardwaj?

  I did. On that, and in life, do you think all people tend to underestimate you?

• 20:59Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 20:59Jake Bhardwaj?

  I think a lot of people going into that underestimated you.

• 21:01Speaker 04

  So do I.

• 21:02Jake Bhardwaj?

  And have you had that a lot in your career where?

• 21:06Speaker 04

  Yes, maybe.

• 21:08Jake Bhardwaj?

  They've put you in a box and you're like, whoa, whoa, whoa.

• 21:10Speaker 04

  Yes. Which is why I keep trying to scramble out of the box and surprise them. And play different parts. Yes, definitely, definitely.

• 21:20Jake Bhardwaj?

  Okay, okay.

• 21:24Jake Bhardwaj?

  Time for Mind Over Platter. Brought to you by Tesco Kitchen. The YouTube series where big personalities and actually useful cooking tips come together.

• 21:34Speaker 03

  So we're going to go through three kitchen archetypes, okay? Three brand new kitchen archetypes to see which one is most like you. The backseat chef. I've spoken about this a little bit before, where I am so guilty for this because I just tell everyone that they should be stirring a certain way, they should be frying a certain way. Do you have a little bit of that in you?

• 21:53Jake Bhardwaj?

  No.

• 21:54Speaker 03

  No, you're willing to let people get on with it?

• 21:56Jake Bhardwaj?

  I want them to paint their canvas on their own. And when they leave the room for a second, I'll just be there hovering over it a little bit just to keep an eye on it, rather than, you know, taking over.

• 22:08Speaker 03

  I just can't do it.

• 22:09Jake Bhardwaj?

  I mean, that was a polite way of saying, no, I do do that a little bit, actually. I'm a backseat cook.

• 22:13Speaker 03

  Problem I find is that I just, when I see someone make a mistake, I can't just stay quiet. My mum thinks a chili con carne is a bolognese with kidney beans.

• 22:23Jake Bhardwaj?

  What?

• 22:24Speaker 03

  My mum thinks chili con carne is a bolognese with kidney beans.

• 22:27Jake Bhardwaj?

  Well, it is.

• 22:27Speaker 03

  It's not. It's not, Joe. A bolognese has red wine, it might have basil in it, it might have parsley. A chili, it's got cumin and paprika and all sorts of other flavours.

• 22:40Jake Bhardwaj?

  You could chuck that in on top of the, when you've done the bolognese.

• 22:43Speaker 03

  I can't, if I see her make a really full Italian flavourful sort of dish and then just put kidney beans and say it's chili con carne, we're having it with sour cream and guacamole. I just think, oh, come on, get out of town.

• 22:53Jake Bhardwaj?

  I'm with your mum on this.

• 22:53Speaker 03

  Do things properly, that's what I'm asking.

• 22:56Jake Bhardwaj?

  All right, fair enough.

• 22:57Speaker 03

  There's the leftover alchemist. The sort of chef who can just transform any bits of leftovers into something brand new. Three chips, half a bit of chicken and some hummus into a brand new dish. Are you the sort of guy that does that?

• 23:08Jake Bhardwaj?

  I can do that, but it just tends to be, put it all in a pan.

• 23:12Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 23:12Jake Bhardwaj?

  Get a masher.

• 23:14Speaker 03

  Really?

• 23:14Jake Bhardwaj?

  And then I fry it. It's a weird cross between a frittata and bubble and squeak.

• 23:18Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 23:19Jake Bhardwaj?

  You know, where it's just like, like a Spanish omelette.

• 23:22Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 23:22Jake Bhardwaj?

  If you mash it all up, put it in a pan, flatten it, and then mix it with some eggs. Spanish omelette.

• 23:29Speaker 03

  Nice, nice little inflection there as well. This leads me on to the final archetype, the chaos merchant. This is someone using every pan, every inch of the worktop, every little thing in the kitchen. It's a mess, it's a bomb site, all right? Just to make scrambled eggs.

• 23:44Jake Bhardwaj?

  No, that's not me.

• 23:46Speaker 03

  That is me.

• 23:47Jake Bhardwaj?

  That's not me. That is you? I mean, that's sort of you in everyday life.

• 23:51Speaker 03

  Wherever I, wherever I sort of like going.

• 23:53Jake Bhardwaj?

  You're like a bull in a china shop, you are.

• 23:55Speaker 03

  That's terrible, isn't it?

• 23:55Jake Bhardwaj?

  You come in here and you wreck the place, everyone still loves you and then you leave.

• 23:59Speaker 03

  Oh. That was a really sweet end to what I thought was quite a damning character assassination.

• 24:06Jake Bhardwaj?

  Take it how you want, mate. Anyway, whatever type of mindset you have, check out Tesco Kitchen. There are loads of great celebs on there, like Ed Gamble, Phil Wang and Bella Mackie.

• 24:17Speaker 03

  And Joe, of course.

• 24:18Jake Bhardwaj?

  To see me make the world's best lamb kebabs, head to Tesco Kitchen YouTube channel after this podcast.

• 24:31Jake Bhardwaj?

  The action's on the court. And as the official beer sponsor of the NBA, Michelob Ultra is getting fans closer to the game with a chance to win courtside seats, merch and more. Visit michelobultra.com/courtside to enter. Michelob Ultra Courtside, 26 to 27, no purchase necessary, open to US residents 21+ begins on October 1st, 2026 and ends on June 30th, 2027. Multiple entry periods. See official rules at michelobultra.com/courtside for free entry, entry deadlines, prizes and details.

• 24:59Speaker 05

  Whenever fall comes back around, it always feels like a fresh start. This year, I've been layering in some styles from the new Lululemon fall drop because the weather is shifting and I find I have to be ready for the entire day and not just one part of it. Lululemon's fall line has some really versatile transitional pieces. So I can just wake up, throw on a matching set, add a jacket or a fleece and head out, knowing that I'll feel comfortable enough to go wherever the day takes me. Check out the new fall arrivals in store and online now at lululemon.com.

• 25:28Speaker 06

  Blowing ad budget on metrics that look great, till the CFO sees them, that's bull spend. And marketers are calling it out, in. Dashboard, confessions.

• 25:38Jake Bhardwaj?

  I remember telling my boss, it'll be good for the brand, when leads were slow. Yeah, it, it wasn't.

• 25:46Speaker 06

  Cut the bull spend. LinkedIn lets you target by company, job title and more. Advertise on LinkedIn. Spend $250 on your first campaign and get a $250 credit. Go to LinkedIn.com/campaign. Terms and conditions apply.

• 25:58Jake Bhardwaj?

  Let's talk about your new book.

• 26:00Speaker 04

  Oh, yes.

• 26:01Jake Bhardwaj?

  The Elegant Hustler.

• 26:02Speaker 04

  Hmm.

• 26:03Jake Bhardwaj?

  Wait, like first of all, what is an elegant hustler?

• 26:06Speaker 04

  Me, apparently, I'll tell you.

• 26:09Jake Bhardwaj?

  Not apparently, you are, that is the perfect description of you.

• 26:12Speaker 04

  Well, it was my manager's young, rather handsome son who gave me the title. Because he found out that I came across from, this is in LA. I came across from Southampton on the QM2. I don't know whether you know what I'm talking about.

• 26:31Jake Bhardwaj?

  Boat?

• 26:32Speaker 04

  Yeah, ship.

• 26:33Jake Bhardwaj?

  Ship.

• 26:33Speaker 04

  Right across to New York and then three days on the train, the Amtrak trains to LA. And he thought this was an absolutely extraordinary way to travel. And that's, that's how he named me and I thought it was quite a good title.

• 26:49Jake Bhardwaj?

  I couldn't agree more that you are.

• 26:51Speaker 04

  Thank you.

• 26:52Jake Bhardwaj?

  A very elegant hustler.

• 26:54Speaker 04

  And so the book is all about my travels. And, and the great thing is I also have written it with my great friend from way back, Fidelis Morgan, and we write together. Because we began off in 1975 is when we met, doing a world tour with the great Glenn Jackson. That's how we met. And it's, I met a young Irish boy on last Monday. This young man, he told me that he played guitar and it was his absolute passion to go to Nashville. And eventually he got there and he said, but the awful thing was, there I,

• 27:39Speaker 04

  I got there eventually and had quite a tough time, actually. And, and I remember him saying, he'd sort of burnt himself out on the guitar. And he said he had a bit of a nervous breakdown, but he said, actually, it was a nervous breakthrough. And he was very much helped by the King's Trust. Somebody believed in him and got him back on his feet. And then his dream was to go to Nashville and he got there and he got there and he said, but there was nobody to share it with. My girlfriend wasn't there and he said, I so, when I went to the Grand Old Opry, I wanted to say, come with me because this is where Dolly Parton sang and, and he said, it was this, it was so sad because he hadn't got his girlfriend beside him.

• 28:22Speaker 04

  I know now that he's getting married next May, so I'm delighted for him, but that's what's important if you go on a long journey. To have somebody there to say, I mean, particularly on a train, there's some wonderful mountain range or some eagle that's just gone past the window. You've got someone just saying, look, and share it. And that's what I have with my friend, Fidelis Morgan, who loves the same amount of sort of mad travel as I do.

• 28:52Jake Bhardwaj?

  So if you had to pick one, what is the most adventurous journey, like your most favourite journey that you've been on then?

• 28:59Speaker 04

  Well, I suppose anything that I did in India, actually. Because I went on the trains in India as well. And I'll never forget this, I was in Delhi and I was going to take my first train up to Udaipur. And I can remember, because you can't believe how many people there are in the world, actually. But in India, the trains are absolutely jammed, people are sort of leaning out of the windows. And this gentleman of about 75, I reckon, he leapt onto the top of the moving train, onto the roof as it came into the station. Because when it stopped, he slithered down and managed to climb in the window and get himself a seat.

• 29:43Speaker 04

  I promise you, it was the most wonderful sight. I mean, apart from everything that I ever saw in India.

• 29:50Jake Bhardwaj?

  Incredible.

• 29:51Speaker 04

  Have you been yet?

• 29:52Jake Bhardwaj?

  No.

• 29:53Speaker 04

  Joe.

• 29:54Jake Bhardwaj?

  I need to get out more, don't I?

• 29:55Speaker 04

  Well, you'd love it.

• 29:57Jake Bhardwaj?

  Would I? Would I be able to fit in the windows if I slithered down and then get one of the seats?

• 30:02Speaker 03

  Some people just sit on the roof of the, of the train.

• 30:05Speaker 04

  They do, though.

• 30:05Speaker 03

  And then just travel like that.

• 30:06Jake Bhardwaj?

  I think I'd just sit on the roof.

• 30:08Speaker 04

  Yeah. I think you'd love it.

• 30:09Jake Bhardwaj?

  How quick does this train go?

• 30:12Speaker 04

  Hmm, not that fast.

• 30:15Jake Bhardwaj?

  I'd be all right. So it's that classic picture of everyone coming out the windows, people on the roof and it's just jam packed.

• 30:20Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 30:21Jake Bhardwaj?

  And you absolutely loved it, like that whole experience.

• 30:24Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 30:24Jake Bhardwaj?

  What about worst journey that you'd go, oh, that's something I don't ever want to do?

• 30:31Speaker 04

  I suddenly thought it'd be rather a good idea to go the, to go to the Ice Hotel. Why?

• 30:37Jake Bhardwaj?

  Where's the Ice Hotel?

• 30:38Speaker 04

  It's in Narvik, or Norway way.

• 30:42Jake Bhardwaj?

  Yeah.

• 30:43Speaker 04

  But to lie and go to sleep on a block of ice, Joe, covered in a reindeer's skin, why would you think that would be fun?

• 30:52Jake Bhardwaj?

  I didn't think, you thought it.

• 30:54Speaker 04

  No, but really.

• 30:55Speaker 03

  Good for your back though, probably, isn't it?

• 30:56Speaker 04

  Oh, my God.

• 30:57Speaker 03

  Solid bit of ice.

• 30:58Speaker 04

  Well, you don't sleep because you're freezing. You're in a sort of igloo. So you all wake up with, you know, red noses. And I can remember thinking, well, we haven't slept so far. I know, what we'll do is, we'll go downstairs and make ourselves a cup of tea at half past four in the morning, before everybody else gets up. Well, we went downstairs and the entire residents of the hotel were having the same idea. Because we were all absolutely frozen. Why did we think it was going to be fun?

• 31:29Jake Bhardwaj?

  But I guess you have to do those ones.

• 31:31Speaker 04

  You do.

• 31:32Jake Bhardwaj?

  In order to really appreciate the good ones. Otherwise, if they were all good.

• 31:35Speaker 04

  No, no, no.

• 31:36Jake Bhardwaj?

  You wouldn't be able to differentiate, you've got to really appreciate them like that. So we've had, we've had your best adventure.

• 31:42Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 31:42Jake Bhardwaj?

  We've had your worst adventure. What about an adventure that you've been on that's maybe got you into a bit of trouble?

• 31:50Speaker 04

  Who?

• 31:52Jake Bhardwaj?

  You know, have you been arrested at any point?

• 31:54Speaker 04

  Very nearly, actually.

• 31:56Jake Bhardwaj?

  Oh, really?

• 31:56Speaker 04

  Very, very nearly.

• 31:59Speaker 04

  Well, if I tell you that I was in a place called Fresno, ever been? Don't bother.

• 32:05Jake Bhardwaj?

  Fresno?

• 32:07Speaker 04

  No, seriously, don't bother. I was in Los Angeles and my friend Fidelis was in Davis. And we decided one weekend to meet in the middle. We got there sort of about half past six at night looking for the hotel that we'd booked, which was the Radisson.

• 32:26Speaker 04

  And it was all boarded up. And, um, and we thought, now what? So anyway, we, we noticed there was nobody really about. And then we noticed the casino was open, so we went down there. And it was jam packed and some, and asking people, what about the Radisson? Cause we'd booked and paid for the thing. Oh, no, it's moved. No, no, it's, no, no, it's, it's moved. One person said, no, no, it's moved to the other side of town. So we had to walk, not knowing the place at all, to the other side of town. By this time it was getting dark. And, um, uh, we, we walked around and found somewhere with a bit more lights. And two gentlemen were coming towards me and I said, um, um, excuse me,

• 33:08Speaker 04

  can you tell me where I'm, I'm looking for my, a hotel? And they took terrible fright and thought I was trying to pick them up and sort of scarpered. Um, and the next minute, um, this police car drew up and said, are you two street walking? And seriously? And we said, no, um, we're, we're, we're looking for a hotel. She said, get in. And she put the flat of her hand on my head and shoved me down into this, uh, back of her police car, you know, black and white, real flashing and everything. And then she realized that we were serious and we were looking. She said, what, you know, where are you trying to go to? And we said the Radisson and she went on her walkie talkie and found out that actually it had moved.

• 33:53Speaker 04

  It was the other side of the town. She said, but you should not be walking around, you two. This is not safe place for you. And I got a free ride in a police car all the way to the front door of the Radisson. And I don't think the receptionist was very pleased. They wondered who on earth was arriving.

• 34:12Jake Bhardwaj?

  What a turn up for the books where you go, one minute I'm being accused of a streetwalker and then I'm getting picked up and then dropped off door to door.

• 34:19Speaker 04

  In, in these, and I don't know if you've ever been in the back of a, a real American, uh, police car. You might have been.

• 34:27Jake Bhardwaj?

  Why would you assume that?

• 34:28Speaker 04

  No, I don't. But anyway, I can tell you, it's, uh, you know, like a sort of Baker light, uh, seat. You absolutely can't move once you're in. But what a, that, that was.

• 34:39Jake Bhardwaj?

  But you enjoyed it?

• 34:40Speaker 04

  I loved it. I loved it. I loved it. I thought I was in Kaja.

• 34:44Jake Bhardwaj?

  You could see your face just turned in the mirror. Yeah, yeah, but oh God, what a joy ride that was. What, um, what about your Celia bucket list? What's left on it then?

• 34:55Speaker 04

  Well, I, I suppose I'd quite like to go to Japan or China.

• 34:59Jake Bhardwaj?

  You've never done Japan?

• 35:01Speaker 04

  No, have you?

• 35:02Jake Bhardwaj?

  Oh, Celia.

• 35:03Speaker 04

  Okay, so you.

• 35:04Jake Bhardwaj?

  You need to get to Japan immediately if not sooner.

• 35:06Speaker 04

  Your Japan is my India, so swaps.

• 35:08Jake Bhardwaj?

  Oh, let's swap see. Why don't we go to Japan together?

• 35:12Speaker 04

  Shall we?

• 35:12Jake Bhardwaj?

  And then you take me to India.

• 35:14Speaker 04

  Well.

• 35:14Jake Bhardwaj?

  And that's on record now.

• 35:15Speaker 04

  It would be wonderful, wouldn't it?

• 35:17Jake Bhardwaj?

  And I would usually offer to be the gentleman, but you're very much paying.

• 35:24Jake Bhardwaj?

  You've got to go to Japan.

• 35:25Speaker 04

  I know.

• 35:26Jake Bhardwaj?

  Oh my God, it's the most incredible place. I've been, I went there in 2019 for the World Cup and we stayed there for eight or nine weeks.

• 35:35Speaker 04

  Did you?

• 35:36Jake Bhardwaj?

  Travelling from the bottom, doing, uh, Miyazaki to Kobe, Osaka, and then ended up in Tokyo and it was just.

• 35:45Speaker 04

  And did you love the food?

• 35:46Jake Bhardwaj?

  The food was incredible. The people.

• 35:49Speaker 04

  You see, the thing is.

• 35:49Jake Bhardwaj?

  Insane.

• 35:51Speaker 04

  Insane good?

• 35:52Jake Bhardwaj?

  Insanely incredible.

• 35:54Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 35:54Jake Bhardwaj?

  Just.

• 35:55Speaker 04

  But you see, because it couldn't be more different. That's what's attractive.

• 36:00Jake Bhardwaj?

  Incredible. You've got to get that.

• 36:01Speaker 04

  Did you do all the bowing and everything? All the time?

• 36:04Jake Bhardwaj?

  Even to the point like learning, I'd bow, then they'd bow and then I'd bow again. And then it was like, well, you end up having a bow off until you end up having to walk out the room. And they keep bowing and like, and there's also a rule in terms of how low you bow.

• 36:20Speaker 04

  Yes, I'm sure.

• 36:21Jake Bhardwaj?

  So the lower you bow, the more respect you're giving? So I ended up being like, right, just walking around with the, like, it was just incredible.

• 36:29Speaker 04

  But, but that's good, I think, to, to take on what is the way to be. You know, it doesn't hurt. Just learn it and then abide by it. I love the, uh, total different way of life that you would have to abide by if you were in Japan.

• 36:50Jake Bhardwaj?

  Yeah.

• 36:50Speaker 04

  As, as in India too. In India or in Pakistan even, where I went, um, uh, a long time ago. And you had to cover up your chest, right down to your wrists, your ankles, your head. And you had to do that, which doesn't hurt. You haven't, you must do what is.

• 37:13Jake Bhardwaj?

  For me, it's all about experiencing different cultures.

• 37:16Speaker 04

  Yeah, exactly.

• 37:16Jake Bhardwaj?

  As opposed to going, well, this is what I'm used to.

• 37:19Speaker 04

  No.

• 37:20Jake Bhardwaj?

  But what's the point? What's the point in going there then?

• 37:21Speaker 04

  No, exactly.

• 37:23Jake Bhardwaj?

  You might as well have just stayed at home and had your ham, egg and chips.

• 37:25Speaker 04

  Yep.

• 37:26Jake Bhardwaj?

  Do you know what I mean? You go and e- experience all these different things and take away the bits that you do like about it. And you can pick holes in the stuff that you don't like about it when you get back home.

• 37:36Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 37:36Jake Bhardwaj?

  And you, and do it like that, but you've got to go to Japan.

• 37:42Speaker 04

  Is it going to be weird that my orange juice is going down if you want to?

• 37:45Jake Bhardwaj?

  No, it's perfect. It would be weird if it wasn't.

• 37:47Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 37:49Speaker 04

  Do you ever think?

• 37:49Jake Bhardwaj?

  If it started filling up, that would be very scary.

• 37:50Jake Bhardwaj?

  Like Janet, your orange juice is shit.

• 37:52Speaker 04

  I know, but do you ever think, and this is, this is me going mad. But do you ever think if you drink, are you not surprised it comes out of your ears or your nose?

• 38:04Speaker 04

  I do think that sometimes. I do. I know it's mad, but how come it doesn't? Anyway, I'll finish off.

• 38:14Jake Bhardwaj?

  What do you mean? Uh, Celia Emery, she thinks orange juice is going to come out her ears.

• 38:20Speaker 04

  It might.

• 38:22Jake Bhardwaj?

  It won't.

• 38:22Speaker 04

  You know, no, but.

• 38:24Jake Bhardwaj?

  It, it physically can't come out your ears. It can only come out your ears if you've put it in your ears. And have you ever put orange juice in your ears?

• 38:31Speaker 04

  No, probably not.

• 38:31Jake Bhardwaj?

  I wouldn't recommend it. It's a little bit sticky and sometimes you get infected. Used to it. How many times have you done it? Don't worry about it, okay?

• 38:44Jake Bhardwaj?

  Right, Celia, at the start of the session.

• 38:47Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 38:47Jake Bhardwaj?

  I wanted to work out why is you continually run towards danger and adventure? And then work out whether there's a, a limit to that. And I think there's a scientific way of working that out. Me and Jake have come up with it.

• 39:04Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 39:05Jake Bhardwaj?

  It's a well-known, um, psychological experiment to test that.

• 39:13Speaker 04

  Mm-hmm.

• 39:14Speaker 03

  We are about to play Extreme Crudités. We've got three hot sauces.

• 39:19Speaker 04

  Good.

• 39:20Speaker 03

  Each going from quite hot.

• 39:21Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 39:21Speaker 03

  To very hot, to extremely hot.

• 39:23Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 39:24Speaker 03

  In what I think is the first ever hot sauce based interview game on the internet.

• 39:29Speaker 04

  Very good.

• 39:30Speaker 03

  Um, okay, so I'm going to come over with the Extreme Crudités.

• 39:33Speaker 04

  Very good.

• 39:33Jake Bhardwaj?

  I'm not doing it.

• 39:34Speaker 04

  You've got to.

• 39:35Speaker 03

  So Joe hates hot sauce.

• 39:38Speaker 04

  Does he?

• 39:38Speaker 03

  But he's willing.

• 39:40Speaker 04

  Did you do it on purpose? Cause you knew he hated it.

• 39:42Speaker 03

  Somewhat, yes. He's willing to put his fears to the test in order to help you, his patient. And I think that is an incredible thing for a doctor to do.

• 39:50Speaker 04

  I do too.

• 39:51Jake Bhardwaj?

  Why, why are they, I don't think it's necessary for the hot sauce to be in skulls.

• 39:55Speaker 03

  Yeah, I don't, hot sauces love to have sort of like imagery of skulls and fire and devils on them.

• 40:00Speaker 04

  Where's the skulls? Oh, on that, I didn't see. Oh, actually that is a bit extreme.

• 40:04Speaker 03

  That's extreme, yeah. Okay, Joe, you're going to start. And this is a test to see how willing you are to walk in the face of danger. Um, I'm going to put a bit of the first hot sauce on. And Celia.

• 40:15Speaker 04

  Are we doing it together?

• 40:16Speaker 03

  It's up to you to match how much he puts on if you dare.

• 40:19Speaker 04

  Yeah, I do.

• 40:22Speaker 04

  Joe, that's nothing. That's really weedy.

• 40:27Jake Bhardwaj?

  Weedy?

• 40:28Speaker 04

  It is. Okay, so.

• 40:29Speaker 03

  That's not even showing up on, on any of the cameras, Joe. We're having to change lenses to get more visibility on the hot sauce.

• 40:36Jake Bhardwaj?

  All right, I've done two drops.

• 40:38Speaker 04

  Okay, now you.

• 40:39Jake Bhardwaj?

  How much, you, you say when?

• 40:41Speaker 04

  Well, I, I'm doing the same as you.

• 40:43Speaker 03

  Well, go on, Celia, you could do more if you fancy it.

• 40:45Jake Bhardwaj?

  You've got two drops.

• 40:46Speaker 04

  Okay, all right, cheers.

• 40:48Jake Bhardwaj?

  Che.

• 40:49Speaker 03

  Cheers.

• 40:54Speaker 03

  It's level one.

• 40:56Speaker 03

  How are you finding that?

• 40:59Jake Bhardwaj?

  It's quite hot, isn't it?

• 41:01Speaker 04

  Is it?

• 41:02Jake Bhardwaj?

  That kick started.

• 41:03Speaker 04

  Are you sure this was the least?

• 41:05Speaker 03

  Yeah, that was the least, yeah.

• 41:10Speaker 04

  I thought this was going to be easy.

• 41:12Jake Bhardwaj?

  Well, that was the least and it was mingling. I would just call it there.

• 41:16Speaker 04

  No, no, no, we have to, no, come on.

• 41:18Speaker 03

  Okay, Joe, level two.

• 41:20Speaker 04

  Let's do.

• 41:21Jake Bhardwaj?

  I really don't think you should have this sense of adventure.

• 41:23Speaker 03

  You're both, you're both, you're both very welcome to tap out if you want to sort of end the sense of adventure now.

• 41:27Speaker 04

  Cucumber now.

• 41:28Jake Bhardwaj?

  This is the second hottest.

• 41:30Speaker 04

  I've got to do two, two drops.

• 41:34Speaker 04

  Oh, Lord.

• 41:35Jake Bhardwaj?

  One.

• 41:36Speaker 04

  And another one.

• 41:37Jake Bhardwaj?

  No.

• 41:37Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 41:38Jake Bhardwaj?

  You do another one.

• 41:39Speaker 04

  I'm going to.

• 41:43Speaker 04

  One, two, okay, ready?

• 41:46Jake Bhardwaj?

  Cheers.

• 41:46Speaker 04

  Go.

• 41:47Jake Bhardwaj?

  Thanks.

• 41:52Jake Bhardwaj?

  This is extremely red hot sauce. The first one was fiery Diablo.

• 41:57Speaker 04

  This, this doesn't feel so hot. Does it?

• 42:00Jake Bhardwaj?

  You shitting me?

• 42:03Jake Bhardwaj?

  You don't.

• 42:06Speaker 04

  Slow burn.

• 42:07Speaker 03

  I think Joe might disagree.

• 42:07Jake Bhardwaj?

  That's a slow burner, that one.

• 42:08Speaker 04

  Are we ever going to taste anything for the rest of the day?

• 42:11Jake Bhardwaj?

  My guts are going to be in bits.

• 42:13Speaker 04

  Okay, that's that. Okay.

• 42:16Speaker 03

  Okay, are you willing to go for the final?

• 42:18Speaker 04

  Yep.

• 42:18Speaker 03

  Sauce?

• 42:19Jake Bhardwaj?

  Do you?

• 42:19Speaker 03

  Joe, you.

• 42:20Jake Bhardwaj?

  I'm not doing.

• 42:20Speaker 03

  This is meant to be a test of Celia's adventure. I mean, this is more whether Joe's going to go for it.

• 42:25Jake Bhardwaj?

  I can't let her down. She's my Celia.

• 42:28Speaker 03

  Okay. But you know what? It's the third one, let's go three drops, shall we?

• 42:32Speaker 04

  Yep.

• 42:32Speaker 03

  Why not?

• 42:33Speaker 04

  Right, now we have to do three drops now. Bloody hell.

• 42:38Speaker 04

  One, two, oh Lord, three, okay. Get one, uh, one.

• 42:46Jake Bhardwaj?

  Two.

• 42:48Speaker 04

  Three, okay, ready, stick it.

• 42:50Jake Bhardwaj?

  Cheers.

• 42:59Speaker 04

  It seems like not so bad at this moment.

• 43:03Jake Bhardwaj?

  And then?

• 43:08Speaker 04

  Now, why haven't you got steam coming out of your ears, Nigel?

• 43:12Jake Bhardwaj?

  Because it's full of orange juice.

• 43:16Jake Bhardwaj?

  I can't feel my tongue.

• 43:18Speaker 04

  No, you won't for the rest of the day.

• 43:20Jake Bhardwaj?

  What sort of adventures do you think you've had now?

• 43:22Speaker 04

  Quite good.

• 43:23Jake Bhardwaj?

  Quite?

• 43:26Speaker 04

  No, seriously, we did it.

• 43:30Jake Bhardwaj?

  I'll be honest, Celia, I don't know what we did, but we did it.

• 43:34Speaker 04

  We did it.

• 43:35Jake Bhardwaj?

  And I'm really proud of you.

• 43:37Speaker 04

  And you. I wouldn't mind a tissue because my nose is running now. No tissues in your doctor's surgery. That's too weird.

• 43:45Jake Bhardwaj?

  I love you. I think you're absolutely wonderful. I have to...

• 43:50Speaker 04

  Stop now.

• 43:51Jake Bhardwaj?

  Yeah, I do have to stop now, but I also have to often pinch myself that I go, did I really sit in the Land Rover with Celia Imrie? And am I really sitting across the table pretending to be a psychiatrist?

• 44:06Speaker 04

  You're the best.

• 44:07Jake Bhardwaj?

  With Celia Imrie? And I go, I feel so lucky.

• 44:11Speaker 04

  So do I.

• 44:13Jake Bhardwaj?

  I've loved hearing all about your adventures. I'd loved rummaging around in that tiny, beautiful brain of yours.

• 44:23Speaker 03

  Tiny? What? Why is it tiny?

• 44:25Jake Bhardwaj?

  Because she's got a tiny head.

• 44:26Speaker 03

  Oh, right, fair enough.

• 44:32Jake Bhardwaj?

  Obviously, she's going to have a tiny brain. She's got a tiny head.

• 44:34Speaker 03

  Yeah, it's just weird to say to someone, I love how small your brain is, as a compliment from a psychiatrist.

• 44:43Jake Bhardwaj?

  I've no idea what we've managed to achieve for you today, but I don't care because just spending time in your company has made me happier. So, thank you for coming in.

• 44:53Speaker 04

  Come on, do you say that to everybody? I hope you don't.

• 44:56Jake Bhardwaj?

  No. Celia, before every client, patient, guest goes, we get to give them a badge to say, well done on achieving fuck knows what you achieved today, apart from being wonderful.

• 45:11Speaker 04

  And what will it say on it?

• 45:13Jake Bhardwaj?

  Well, that's what my research assistant Jake has come up with.

• 45:16Speaker 03

  It's different for every guest, and today the design is different every time as well. We've gone with hotter than Joe Marler because you did very well on that final test.

• 45:24Jake Bhardwaj?

  Yeah, I would say that's not a huge compliment. It's quite a low bar to be.

• 45:29Speaker 04

  But actually, we both did quite well, I thought. I mean, we're still talking.

• 45:36Jake Bhardwaj?

  Yeah.

• 45:36Speaker 04

  We won't taste anything.

• 45:37Jake Bhardwaj?

  I'm desperate to wrap it up because I need to leave.

• 45:40Speaker 04

  Why? Where are you going?

• 45:41Jake Bhardwaj?

  Yeah.

• 45:42Speaker 03

  The loo.

• 45:43Speaker 04

  Oh, Joe, don't be a wuss. Honestly, come on.

• 45:47Speaker 03

  Only wuss is poo.

• 45:48Speaker 04

  Can I put this on now?

• 45:51Speaker 04

  I've got my badge. Can I have a lolly as well?

• 45:53Jake Bhardwaj?

  You get a lollipop as well.

• 45:54Speaker 04

  Yes, thank you.

• 45:56Jake Bhardwaj?

  You're going for sunshine yellow, are you?

• 45:58Speaker 04

  Well, I am. I mean, I could have...

• 45:59Jake Bhardwaj?

  You are sunshine yellow.

• 46:00Speaker 04

  Thank you, darling.

• 46:01Jake Bhardwaj?

  You're very much my sunshine.

• 46:03Speaker 04

  This will help you and your tongue.

• 46:05Jake Bhardwaj?

  Well, I get to have one.

• 46:06Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 46:06Jake Bhardwaj?

  Can I have one, Jake?

• 46:07Speaker 03

  Yeah, go on then.

• 46:08Speaker 04

  Because this will help our on fire tongues.

• 46:13Jake Bhardwaj?

  They're what?

• 46:13Speaker 03

  Nothing. They're good. They're good to go.

• 46:15Jake Bhardwaj?

  Well, they're not because they're very hard to get off, aren't they?

• 46:21Speaker 04

  This will help our tongues.

• 46:25Jake Bhardwaj?

  I meant, give me your rubbish.

• 46:34Speaker 04

  My God, my doctor.

• 46:35Jake Bhardwaj?

  You are wonderful. Celia Imrie, everybody. Janet will sort you out. You can catch up on your Scottish dancing.

• 46:42Speaker 04

  Sort me out and see me up?

• 46:43Jake Bhardwaj?

  See apps.

• 46:45Speaker 04

  Thank you, Joe.

• 46:46Jake Bhardwaj?

  Goodbye. Celia Imrie.

• 46:50Jake Bhardwaj?

  If you want to join the doctor's waiting list, then please subscribe to our YouTube channel and follow us on Instagram at We'll See You Now Show. Remember, unless it's not clear enough already, Celia pointed it out several times.

• 47:02Speaker 03

  She did.

• 47:02Jake Bhardwaj?

  I'm not a real doctor, so if you need any professional help, you'll find a link to great support services on our Instagram. I've been Joe Marler, he's been Jake Bardwaj, and this has been Joe Marler. We'll see you now.

• 47:15Speaker 03

  And we'll see you next time.

• 47:16Jake Bhardwaj?

  Bye bye.

• 47:16Speaker 03

  Bye.

• 47:18Speaker 05

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• 47:48Jake Bhardwaj?

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