Pod Insights Help I Sexted My Boss William Ruined Jordan’s Birthday | And High-Maintenance Boys About this episode There’s fallout from Jordan’s birthday after William let a key part of the weekend slip through his carefully manicured fingers. There are also heated discussions about Blue Peter badges, Paddington Bear and the revelation that William has NEVER had a KFC.
If you want to get involved you can email us mailto: [email protected] , and for more Sexted fun sign up https://sextedmyboss.com/newsletter/ to our free VIG&Diva newsletter. You can follow us and DM on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/sextedmyboss/ and TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@sextedmyboss, and watch the latest episode every Tuesday and Friday on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/c/SextedMyBoss.
Help I Sexted My Boss is presented by William Hanson and Jordan North. It is an Audio Always http://www.audioalways.com production.
If you want to get involved you can email us mailto: [email protected] . You can follow us and DM on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/sextedmyboss/ and TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@sextedmyboss, and watch the latest episode every Tuesday and Friday on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/c/SextedMyBoss.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy https://acast.com/privacy for more information.
Transcript 0:00 Speaker 00 Confidence, it's listening to your gut. It's moving forward even when the path ahead is unclear. For nearly 160 years, Pacific Life has helped people keep their promises, building confidence for generations. Whether you're confident in your financial future or just beginning to envision it, we're here to help. Ask a financial professional how. Pacific Life, the power of a promise. Pacific Life Insurance Company, Omaha, Nebraska, and in New York. Pacific Life and Annuity, Phoenix, Arizona.
0:34 Speaker 01 Most women have been there. Something feels off. You don't feel like yourself, yet your doctor says everything looks fine. Spoiler, it's your hormones. Midi is a virtual care platform built for women by women and offers specialized hormone care from trained clinicians. Plus, it's covered by most major insurances. Getting started is easy. You can book your first visit with a clinician right away. It's not you, it's your hormones. Visit joinmidi.com to book your first visit. That's joinmidi.com. Insurance coverage varies. Check with your plan for coverage.
1:12 Speaker 02 Hello and welcome to our Friday episode. This is where we see how much extra content we can squeeze into your week. Random things that have been sent in, extra bits that have been going on, and how our advice went down with you. How wonderful, Gian Divas.
1:25 Speaker 03 How are you?
1:25 Speaker 02 I'm good. How are you?
1:26 Speaker 03 Yes, you've got a nice weekend planned?
1:28 Speaker 02 I have. Like I said, on Tuesday's episode, I've got that wedding tomorrow.
1:33 Speaker 03 Oh, yes, of course.
1:34 Speaker 02 Coming back to London.
1:35 Speaker 03 Lovely.
1:36 Speaker 02 I've been looking forward to this all week.
1:38 Speaker 03 Coming back to London?
1:39 Speaker 02 No, on Sunday, I'm having a KFC.
1:42 Speaker 03 Sorry, you've planned that?
1:43 Speaker 02 Yeah, people think it's weird. I've already got the order in my basket as well.
1:48 Speaker 03 What happens if they change the menu between now and then?
1:49 Speaker 02 Well, they won't. It's KFC. I just sent an advert.
1:51 Speaker 03 Did they not refresh the menu?
1:53 Speaker 02 No, not really. It's the same, isn't it? I sent an advert for KFC.
1:58 Speaker 03 Okay.
1:59 Speaker 02 On Monday night, and I went, you know what? Let's have a KFC this weekend.
2:03 Speaker 03 For dinner?
2:04 Speaker 02 Yeah. And I've not had one for ages. I pop a KFC bargain bucket. Oh.
2:09 Speaker 03 Do you know, I've never had a KFC.
2:10 Speaker 02 You've never had a KFC? You would love a KFC.
2:13 Speaker 03 I've had a Burger King.
2:14 Speaker 02 You have?
2:14 Speaker 03 I've had a McDonald's.
2:16 Speaker 02 You can't be at KFC. KFC gravy, KFC beans, no.
2:21 Speaker 04 You've had Five Guys?
2:22 Speaker 03 I've had Five Guys. Um.
2:26 Speaker 02 Insert pun, he's gonna do it first.
2:28 Speaker 03 No, no, no.
2:29 Speaker 02 Mexican standoff music.
2:33 Speaker 03 Um, I've had an Andos, I've had a Domino's, I've had all of that, but I have never had a KFC.
2:39 Speaker 02 When we go on tour, having a KFC, it's the best, that you've got to take a big glass of water to Bedouin, but it's the best. Honestly, the chicken is so nice.
2:48 Speaker 03 In McDonald's, they've got, they've brought back a, a food item that, uh, a friend text us, texted my email saying, would we like a Big Arch? Have you ever had a Big Arch?
3:00 Speaker 02 No, what's a Big Arch?
3:01 Speaker 03 Well, that was all is, but it's, uh, the pen has just dropped, uh, it's just a burger. But it's got some sort of special sauce, they've got it for a limited time only. Giles Corran wrote about it in the Times last year, or last time they had it, saying it was the best burger he'd ever had.
3:17 Speaker 02 Really?
3:18 Speaker 03 Yeah.
3:19 Speaker 02 Really?
3:19 Speaker 03 Personally, I would disagree. But it's, it's all right.
3:23 Speaker 02 I think when it comes to burgers, McDonald's, I just love, I love a Mackies, I love them all. In moderation, but KFC, I like, um, I've not had for ages.
3:33 Speaker 03 I just, what do they do?
3:35 Speaker 02 Chicken.
3:36 Speaker 03 I don't really like it, I don't want.
3:37 Speaker 02 No, but you'll love this, like the chickens, there's a special recipe, the Colonel's recipe.
3:43 Speaker 03 No, it's not, oh, don't give into the marketing.
3:45 Speaker 02 It is, it was an actual, it was an actual fella called the, the, the, the Colonel came up with a chicken. And Ronald McDonald came up with a burger.
3:54 Speaker 03 It was probably a woman who came up with it, and as, as ever, a man has taken credit for it that doesn't even exist.
4:01 Speaker 03 Sorry, there I said it.
4:04 Speaker 02 Yeah.
4:04 Speaker 03 I'm like Gloria Steinem, aren't I?
4:06 Speaker 02 Yeah, we've all seen that NASA film, I don't know what you're getting at.
4:11 Speaker 03 Oh, yeah.
4:11 Speaker 02 Yeah.
4:11 Speaker 03 No, well, I actually haven't seen it.
4:12 Speaker 04 Hidden Figures.
4:13 Speaker 02 Oh, it's a great film, that's a bloody good film. Do you think there's gonna be a Hidden Figures Part Two about KFC?
4:19 Speaker 03 Yes.
4:20 Speaker 02 Okay.
4:21 Speaker 03 I'd, I'd watch that.
4:22 Speaker 02 Hmm, well, and it turned out, yeah, the woman who invented AI is only just being given, like, recognition for it.
4:31 Speaker 03 She invented AI?
4:32 Speaker 02 Um, weren't, weren't it a woman who invented penicillin as well?
4:35 Speaker 03 Probably.
4:36 Speaker 02 Somebody else got the credit for it.
4:37 Speaker 03 Hmm.
4:37 Speaker 02 Bloody hell.
4:38 Speaker 04 Hidden Figures of how I sexed my boss?
4:40 Speaker 03 Yes, there we go, that's, that's a new spin off podcast series we can do.
4:45 Speaker 02 You can have credit because we started off, we were all together, but bitch plays.
4:52 Speaker 03 Anyway, so have a lovely time at the wedding.
4:54 Speaker 02 Thank you. What are you doing this weekend?
4:55 Speaker 03 Well, I was meant to be in Zurich until my passport got stolen. So I'm going to go and see some friends for, well, roast lunch, roast dinner. It's at three o'clock. You know my thoughts about roasts.
5:05 Speaker 02 Perfect time, perfect time.
5:07 Speaker 03 It's not a meal time.
5:08 Speaker 02 Perfect time to have a roast dinner.
5:09 Speaker 03 Nope.
5:10 Speaker 02 It is.
5:11 Speaker 03 No.
5:11 Speaker 02 Do you know when we had it the other week when we went away?
5:13 Speaker 03 Mm hmm.
5:13 Speaker 02 At 1am.
5:14 Speaker 03 Yeah, you, well, it wasn't 1am, no, it was not 1am.
5:17 Speaker 02 1pm.
5:17 Speaker 03 Yes.
5:18 Speaker 02 Way too early.
5:20 Speaker 03 What, at lunchtime?
5:21 Speaker 02 No, do you not think, Ben? Ben, be honest. And we all went for that roast.
5:25 Speaker 03 Well, some of us had to get away and get on with our lives.
5:27 Speaker 02 Well, we should have gone for brunch.
5:29 Speaker 03 Well, I went for breakfast. Actually, I didn't, actually.
5:32 Speaker 02 We were meant to play paddle, but somebody messed a bucket up. Mister etiquette expert, king of organisation here.
5:40 Speaker 03 It was not strictly my fault. It was nobody's fault.
5:42 Speaker 02 I were cursing you as well that morning, getting ready.
5:45 Speaker 03 Shut up.
5:45 Speaker 02 I was getting ready. I was like, who booked fucking paddle for 10 o'clock on a Sunday?
5:49 Speaker 03 Well, excuse me, plans were, plans were-
5:51 Speaker 02 I was cursing you and I get there, you go, darling, there's been a problem. I thought, I'll swing for you.
5:58 Speaker 03 Well, tell you what, next time-
5:59 Speaker 02 Fucking paddle at 10 o'clock on a Sunday when you've all been out in the piss.
6:01 Speaker 03 North, next time we go away, you can take care of arrangements. We won't end up doing anything.
6:07 Speaker 02 Yeah, we'll go to the bar, get pissed, have something to eat and have another little Sunday stroll when we all wake up.
6:14 Speaker 02 God. Bad enough you booked the bloody lazy lake at 10 o'clock. Who wants to be in a pissing lazy lake at 10 o'clock in the morning when they're on go over on the birthday? 11, half 11.
6:23 Speaker 03 They don't have that time. We had a lovely time, though.
6:27 Speaker 02 It was amazing. Thank you.
6:28 Speaker 03 Yeah.
6:29 Speaker 02 And people like you do- No, no, no, you're right there. That isn't grateful because people like you, like the-
6:34 Speaker 03 People like me-
6:35 Speaker 02 The planner in the group, the bookers, the organisers-
6:37 Speaker 03 Yeah, the one that always falls on to do.
6:39 Speaker 02 Don't get enough credit.
6:40 Speaker 03 Thank you.
6:41 Speaker 02 Yeah.
6:41 Speaker 03 Thank you. That's very nice of you.
6:42 Speaker 02 Well, when's your passport arrived? How long does it take?
6:44 Speaker 03 Oh, I've got to go and be probed at Custom House tomorrow at 8.30.
6:49 Speaker 02 Probed?
6:49 Speaker 03 Yeah. I thought my colleagues had to verify my identity, had to upload things. My existing passport's probably on the dark web.
6:59 Speaker 02 Hopefully you're not probed by an ultrasound wand.
7:01 Speaker 03 No.
7:02 Speaker 02 Hopefully get it in the right hole. From Tuesday's-
7:04 Speaker 03 Well, there's only one.
7:06 Speaker 02 That poor woman. I mean, her arse all bloody ultrasound. What would they see up there?
7:14 Speaker 02 Oh, it's a big bugger. Oh, no, sorry, that's a turd, madam.
7:20 Speaker 02 Yeah.
7:20 Speaker 03 Yeah. Anyway, last week, we disagreed about who was the most high maintenance. So of course, we had to run one of our highly scientific polls to settle the debate.
7:29 Speaker 02 Lesson of sarcasm in front of Social Joe, please, who runs these debates. Silent Assassin, you know, she's got bloody those dolls with pins in of us at home. Am I right or am I right, Social Joe? See, what they call?
7:41 Speaker 03 Voodoo dolls. Voodoo dolls.
7:42 Speaker 02 You know it.
7:43 Speaker 03 We had more than 5,000 votes in what may be our closest poll ever.
7:48 Speaker 02 Wow.
7:48 Speaker 03 With the results sitting at 50 50 for a long time. It was very close. The final verdict with just 73 votes in it is that, I mean, it's a wrong poll. Is that I am the most high maintenance, or people think I am the most high maintenance. I just edged you.
8:04 Speaker 02 Oh.
8:04 Speaker 03 Yes.
8:05 Speaker 02 Not for the first time this week.
8:06 Speaker 03 A dream I had last night. Surely though.
8:08 Speaker 02 We're gonna do our little jokes here to get them in together. Do you wanna go first and then I'll go?
8:12 Speaker 03 Yeah, okay. It's like a dream I had last night.
8:15 Speaker 02 Not for the first time you've edged me this week.
8:17 Speaker 03 There we go. So, yes, so presumably, as it was so close, we're both divas.
8:23 Speaker 02 Can you Google for me right now?
8:25 Speaker 03 On my iPad.
8:26 Speaker 02 Yes, the, the full explanation of someone who's high maintenance.
8:32 Speaker 03 Yes, okay.
8:34 Speaker 02 Because I still don't really understand the meaning of someone who's high maintenance.
8:38 Speaker 03 If you do lose your passport, or you in your phone the passport number. Do you know what you, they spend half the automator call asking you if you want to hear this message in Welsh.
8:47 Speaker 02 High maintenance, there you go.
8:48 Speaker 03 I just want it in, I just want a passport. High maintenance means needing a lot of work to keep in good condition.
8:54 Speaker 02 No, not you, in a person, that's high maintenance. Personality. That means like for Ford Focus, you fool.
9:04 Speaker 03 A high maintenance person is someone who requires a significant, often excessive amount of time, attention, emotional energy, or financial resources to be satisfied.
9:13 Speaker 02 Do you know what, Jane Divas?
9:15 Speaker 03 It's more you.
9:16 Speaker 02 I disagree with that poll there.
9:20 Speaker 03 Key, there's more. Key characteristics and behaviours. High attention needs, constant validation, communication or reassurance is required to feel secure.
9:30 Speaker 02 Yeah, you've messed up there, Jane Divas.
9:32 Speaker 03 Difficult to please. They may have unreasonable expectations, change their mind over things they've said three weeks ago, leading to frequent complaints or dissatisfaction.
9:42 Speaker 02 Are you making this up now?
9:43 Speaker 03 No, I'm reading it almost verbatim. Drama prone.
9:48 Speaker 02 Oh, you won't believe what you can't have. Oh, God.
9:50 Speaker 03 They tend to create or attract chaos, disliking calm or quiet situations. Materialistic or demanding, they may have high standards for lifestyle, clothes or gifts, or expect partners to pay for their needs.
10:02 Speaker 02 Oh, no.
10:03 Speaker 03 Imagine that.
10:03 Speaker 02 No.
10:04 Speaker 03 Control orientated, they need to control situations, plans and times and get very cross when paddle bookings are messed up. Shall I continue or are you?
10:14 Speaker 02 No, no, keep going.
10:16 Speaker 03 Common context, while often used negatively in dating to describe someone who is needy or entitled, it can also describe someone with intense, high energy or perfectionist tendencies. It is frequently used interchangeably with demanding, difficult or tiresome.
10:29 Speaker 02 See, what I'm wondering about those social edits is it's just being, well, not hair maintenance, just being perfectionist. Yeah.
10:38 Speaker 03 Right, okay, well, there we go.
10:40 Speaker 02 There you are.
10:41 Speaker 03 Um, shows that votes don't always go the way that you expect.
10:44 Speaker 02 Yeah.
10:45 Speaker 03 Um, it was also my turn to then add to Social Joe's to-do list when I asked her for weird Instagram bios people have seen, because I said it was ridiculous now that people are putting their dietary requirements in their Instagram bio as if to give them a personality. Um, thank you for all of these, um, thank you for all of these, uh, entries. Ariana has seen people's water drinking goals.
11:07 Speaker 02 Oh, my God, what's that mean?
11:09 Speaker 03 Like, oh, I'll try to drink 12 liters of water a day or 12 cups of.
11:13 Speaker 02 Why would you put that in your bio?
11:15 Speaker 03 Lizzie said people including song lyrics is so MSN coded.
11:19 Speaker 02 Do you remember the one that all the girls did on Facebook at uni? If you can't handle me at my words, you certainly don't deserve me at my best, that Marilyn Monroe quote, it turns out Marilyn Monroe never said it, I swear.
11:30 Speaker 03 Hmm.
11:30 Speaker 02 Yeah, all right.
11:31 Speaker 03 It's the precursor to live, laugh, love, really. Um, Shah spotted RIP Nan in someone's Tinder bio.
11:38 Speaker 02 Do you know what as well?
11:40 Speaker 03 Oh, for God's sake.
11:41 Speaker 02 Can, well, you know, you said birthdays last week.
11:44 Speaker 03 Yes, and how people then always use someone else's birthday as an excuse to post a photo of themselves.
11:49 Speaker 02 Well.
11:49 Speaker 03 Because they're narcissistic.
11:50 Speaker 02 What are we with? Happily, happy heavenly birthday.
11:55 Speaker 03 Oh, but it's not their birthday, they're dead.
11:58 Speaker 02 Yeah.
11:58 Speaker 03 Okay.
11:59 Speaker 02 Oh, you know when people go, oh, happy heavenly birthday, Gran, you would have been eighty four today. And it's like.
12:04 Speaker 03 Picture of Gran and person.
12:06 Speaker 02 Yeah, and I, look, no one misses a grandma more than me. Or it's like, happy death anniversary. We still miss you.
12:12 Speaker 03 Yeah.
12:13 Speaker 02 I get if it's like.
12:14 Speaker 04 People do with things in different ways.
12:15 Speaker 02 Yeah, all right, yeah, no, that's not a nice thing to say. I get if it's like a, someone a bit younger, you're like, oh, four years ago, we lost you. And I get that.
12:23 Speaker 03 Hmm.
12:23 Speaker 02 That's fine, but. If it's your nan and she had a good hair, it's, you, you don't, you know.
12:29 Speaker 03 Hmm. Um, Danny saw Blue Peter badge winner in a bio.
12:33 Speaker 02 That's cool. That's cool.
12:35 Speaker 03 But said it's elite top tier as who doesn't want a Blue Peter badge?
12:39 Speaker 02 Yeah, I think that.
12:40 Speaker 03 I got off, asked to do Blue Peter. Um, I couldn't do it, but they were going to pay me with a Blue Peter badge. And I was, I was very tempted, but I was a scheduling conflict.
12:49 Speaker 02 Is it still on?
12:50 Speaker 03 Hmm.
12:51 Speaker 02 Is it?
12:51 Speaker 03 It's online, I believe.
12:52 Speaker 02 Is it still?
12:53 Speaker 03 Yeah.
12:53 Speaker 02 Um, they, they used to be really hard to get then. I just remember for a while, they were giving them out willy nilly.
12:58 Speaker 03 Hmm.
12:59 Speaker 02 Do you remember? No, you used to have to prop a graph for a Blue Peter badge. I remember someone once got a gold one. And now they're just like, um, you've stamped on a can and recycled it, you get a Blue Peter badge.
13:11 Speaker 03 Can I also say something quite controversial?
13:13 Speaker 02 I think we've already, the happily heavenly, earthly one, mate.
13:17 Speaker 03 Can we talk about Paddington Bear and the musical? Like, that bear, okay, like the first time we all saw it, it's very clever how they do it. It was interesting.
13:26 Speaker 02 It's not clever, they've done it for years.
13:27 Speaker 03 That bear's out more than cat now. It goes to everything. It was presenting a thing at the BAFTAs. It met Queen Camilla the other day. They are wheeling it out and they don't need to, because that show is selling and selling and selling. It's supposedly very good. It's going to run for years. It's going to be the next Phantom. But it just, like Paddington, less is more, please.
13:43 Speaker 02 It's not that clever, though. It's just a small person in a costume, you know?
13:47 Speaker 03 Well, I mean, yeah, but it's, it, it looks very realistic and it looks like the, the CGI bear from the films. I mean, it's, it's very-
13:53 Speaker 02 Yeah, it's just how they did it in Star Wars and stuff.
13:55 Speaker 03 Yeah, I know, but they've done, they've done a nice job and there's animatronics to control the mouse and blah, blah, blah.
13:59 Speaker 02 Oh, okay.
14:00 Speaker 03 Yeah, so it's, it's, yeah, but I just feel it's, it's getting ubiquitous. Just my thoughts. Um, Lucy asked if having your Myers-Briggs personality type in your bio is bad because Lucy does, they have theirs, which is ISTJ.
14:14 Speaker 02 Is that the one we did that time?
14:15 Speaker 03 We did, yeah, and we were exactly the same person. I think we're ESTJs off the top of my head. Extroverts. I forget what ST and J mean.
14:22 Speaker 02 No, but I'm an introvert, you say.
14:24 Speaker 03 Yeah, but you are, but I think you have extroverted tendencies. You can be an extroverted introvert.
14:28 Speaker 02 Yeah.
14:29 Speaker 03 And an introverted extrovert.
14:30 Speaker 02 I'm an introvert extrovert.
14:32 Speaker 03 Yeah.
14:32 Speaker 02 No, that was it. I like, I can be an extrovert, but then I need like days to recover and stuff.
14:36 Speaker 03 Yes.
14:36 Speaker 02 Yeah.
14:36 Speaker 04 It's extroverted, sensing, thinking, judging.
14:40 Speaker 03 Thank you. Judging. Us.
14:42 Speaker 02 Us, never.
14:42 Speaker 03 Not the last five minutes. Um, the most complained about-
14:46 Speaker 02 I couldn't go out as much as you in week.
14:49 Speaker 03 Uh, Mike and I have a string of three nights now.
14:50 Speaker 02 I don't know. I generally don't know. Oh, good.
14:53 Speaker 03 Yeah, we're quite excited.
14:54 Speaker 02 I, I, I have five nights a week at home. I don't know how you do it.
14:57 Speaker 03 Yeah, but you, you do do a morning radio show.
14:59 Speaker 02 Hmm. I keep saying I need to stop playing paddle in week and then it gets to it, I think.
15:02 Speaker 03 Oh, let me know. I'll take care of the booking for you.
15:04 Speaker 02 I could, or I could watch Come Down with me.
15:08 Speaker 03 The most complained about parts of people's bios were facts about their family or partner, like their dates of birth or when they got married, and occasionally the date they'd died. An emoji to represent each person or pet, or their names and usernames. Yeah. Where do we stand on people who put their partner in their, uh, Instagram bio?
15:27 Speaker 02 Hmm.
15:28 Speaker 03 And put their handle.
15:29 Speaker 02 That's fine.
15:29 Speaker 03 Isn't that nice?
15:30 Speaker 02 Hmm.
15:30 Speaker 03 Hmm. Um, we noticed that producer Ben has tagged Diego in his bio. Is that an ick? Content director at Audio Always, EBB, at Sex of My Boss, On The Lead, at This Is Diego The Whippet.
15:41 Speaker 02 On the lead, on the leash. What's wrong with that, you little bitches? What's up with you two today? You been, what? Fucking horrible bastards. I said to my daddy, get me on your Instagram. I've been sliding through loads of DMs. I'm in a ball mastiff next week from Hampton. Oh.
15:57 Speaker 03 Um-
15:58 Speaker 04 I should see him. Maybe I should add waiting for Kat to come home.
16:02 Speaker 03 Yes.
16:03 Speaker 04 At Kat.
16:04 Speaker 03 That'd be fun. Yeah, stick, stick a, stick your wife in your bio.
16:07 Speaker 02 What's that wrong with being on my daddy's Instagram bio? Beck off.
16:12 Speaker 03 Social Joe's bio is a list of things about her which she's been described as very millennial, which she rolls her eyes at. And Gen Z Izzy and Jump Cut Jack keep it professional with just their work accounts tagged. Lovely. That's all you need.
16:24 Speaker 02 I won't tag your work account.
16:27 Speaker 03 Who were you directing that at?
16:28 Speaker 02 Izzy.
16:31 Speaker 02 Keep that separate.
16:35 Speaker 03 After last week's dilemma, we had a writer who was asked to replace the batteries in their mum's vibrator. So we asked for embarrassing things that your parents have requested. JB put cream on, oh my god.
16:46 Speaker 02 Now I'm dreading this because I'm going round to my mum's tonight.
16:50 Speaker 03 I don't even think even Wendy would ask you to do this.
16:52 Speaker 02 And bear in mind, she's just moved in, so she's going to be having me doing fucking all sorts.
16:55 Speaker 03 Let's put it this way, has your mum ever had hemorrhoids?
16:59 Speaker 03 And would she ask you to put her cream on her hemorrhoids? Because that's what JB did to one of his parents.
17:05 Speaker 02 Do you know what she said to me?
17:06 Speaker 03 What?
17:08 Speaker 02 She said, she was being really serious. She said, now, I know you were doing alright. She said, but will you just make sure you're putting a bit of money aside for me because I don't want yous lot looking after me. You can do your dad. But she said, I'm not having any of you pulling my knickers up or wiping me arse. Said, so you get me in a really good home where you get some good carers. She went, just think on. I went, right, alright. She went, because you're doing alright, you've no kids, so just think on. She went, because I don't want any of my, so I was like, alright. So no, she absolutely would not want me rubbing.
17:42 Speaker 03 She's future-proofing.
17:43 Speaker 02 Yeah, she won't want me putting hemorrhoid cream in. And when someone up north says, do you think on, they're like.
17:49 Speaker 03 Or is that a?
17:51 Speaker 02 Think on lad, think on.
17:52 Speaker 03 Gillan's mum rang their school before mobile phones to ask them to buy period products on their way home. Lovely. There are a few translation requests.
18:00 Speaker 02 That's fine.
18:02 Speaker 03 Yeah, okay. Karen, I guess phoning the school, I mean.
18:05 Speaker 02 At least you get sent to the shop for them.
18:08 Speaker 03 Okay.
18:09 Speaker 02 Tampons and stuff, yeah.
18:11 Speaker 03 Karen was asked what a pearl necklace is, not the jewellery type. Okay. Lucy, what is a pearl necklace?
18:20 Speaker 03 You see them on Downton, don't you?
18:21 Speaker 02 Yeah, it's that, but I think the sexual connotation is where you...
18:25 Speaker 03 No.
18:26 Speaker 02 You...
18:26 Speaker 03 I wasn't actually thinking you would answer that question.
18:28 Speaker 02 Do you know what it is?
18:29 Speaker 03 Yes, I do. Of course I do.
18:31 Speaker 02 But is it, am I right, is it your spunk on the neck?
18:34 Speaker 03 I believe so, yeah.
18:35 Speaker 02 But like... Ah, yeah.
18:37 Speaker 03 Yeah.
18:38 Speaker 02 Okay. It looks like a pearl necklace.
18:42 Speaker 03 I mean, a pretty cheap one, if I'm honest.
18:44 Speaker 02 It wouldn't.
18:45 Speaker 03 Because the nice ones, they're all the same size.
18:47 Speaker 02 It'd look more like when you top a Christmas pudding.
18:51 Speaker 03 Well, that's the last time we were all eating Christmas pudding.
18:53 Speaker 02 Wouldn't it? It would, wouldn't it? Are you walking out? You think about it, you know, Christmas pudding with, what's it called, the icing on it? It'd look like icing on a Christmas pudding. So it should be called, "Give me a Christmas pudding icing."
19:05 Speaker 03 All right, take your top off.
19:07 Speaker 02 Anyway.
19:09 Speaker 03 Lucy's mum wanted to know what rimming was after it was mentioned on the Graham Norton Show.
19:13 Speaker 02 Oh, God.
19:14 Speaker 03 Laura Brief would be delighted. Just what he wanted.
19:20 Speaker 03 And a lot of uncomfortably close technical support. Sami's nan asked for porn to be added to her iPad. It was two girls, one man, to be specific. It all goes on.
19:31 Speaker 02 What? She asked for a nun?
19:33 Speaker 03 Her nan wanted to watch through some porn, basically. Laura was asked for help to cancel a Pornhub subscription. Similarly, Angela saw Pornhub on their dad's phone while helping him with a tech issue and closing apps.
19:47 Speaker 02 Oh, God, God.
19:48 Speaker 03 Catherine's dad asked them to look at his computer as it kept coming up with pop-ups for Viagra and other spicy things. He had a porn page open in the background and the computer was full of viruses.
19:59 Speaker 02 Brilliant. This is there.
20:00 Speaker 03 It's very embarrassing. We've got more of your emails, messages and letters after the break.
20:09 Speaker 00 Confidence. It's listening to your gut. It's moving forward even when the path ahead is unclear. For nearly 160 years, Pacific Life has helped people keep their promises, building confidence for generations.
20:24 Speaker 00 Whether you're confident in your financial future or just beginning to envision it, we're here to help. Ask a financial professional how. Pacific Life, the power of a promise. Pacific Life Insurance Company, Omaha, Nebraska, and in New York. Pacific Life and Annuity, Phoenix, Arizona.
20:43 Speaker 01 Most women have been there. Something feels off. You don't feel like yourself, yet your doctor says everything looks fine. Spoiler, it's your hormones. Midi is a virtual care platform built for women by women and offers specialized hormone care from trained clinicians. Plus, it's covered by most major insurances. Getting started is easy. You can book your first visit with a clinician right away. It's not you, it's your hormones. Visit joinmidi.com to book your first visit. That's join M I D I dot com. Insurance coverage varies. Check with your plan for coverage.
21:13 Speaker 05 Hello, I'm Luke Jones.
21:14 Speaker 06 And I'm Poppy Damon.
21:15 Speaker 05 We love all the strange true crime stories that you might flick through on a newspaper and think, hang on a minute.
21:24 Speaker 06 And this is Strangely, a podcast where every week we bring you the weirdest, wildest stories ripped straight from the headlines or our notebooks from both sides of the Atlantic.
21:32 Speaker 05 From the stories that you almost certainly missed in the headlines.
21:35 Speaker 06 To the ones you did see and thought, that's odd, but never got to revisit again.
21:39 Speaker 05 If you like strange news.
21:41 Speaker 06 Unexpected twists.
21:42 Speaker 05 And stories that linger on way longer than they should.
21:46 Speaker 06 Listen and subscribe now. Search for Strangely wherever you get your podcasts.
21:56 Speaker 02 Welcome back, Jane Divas. If you're coming to one of our arena shows, we need your help. Cardiff, London, Glasgow, Manchester, there are three things we need from you.
22:05 Speaker 03 Yes, the first is dilemmas. Otherwise, it's a very short second half.
22:09 Speaker 02 Yeah, if you've got any problems with dilemmas that you want us to read out live on stage, get in touch. Second one is if you have a reason for a shout out or just a reason why you should be up on stage with us.
22:19 Speaker 03 Yes, indeed. It could be a special moment in your life or something you want us to celebrate or help organize. And also, we want outrageous true stories about you that would shock or surprise us that you don't mind an arena full of people hearing all about.
22:37 Speaker 02 sextedmyboss.com/Contact for all three. Just make sure you select the night you join us on tour and it goes to the right place. And we will see you at the live shows.
22:46 Speaker 03 It's so close. It is, it is.
22:49 Speaker 02 Touching distance.
22:50 Speaker 03 It's like you a few days ago, edging ever closer. Ben.
22:53 Speaker 04 I've got a thing to add to the list, if that's okay.
22:56 Speaker 03 Okay, four things.
22:58 Speaker 02 Are you coming? Is he coming to the tour?
23:00 Speaker 03 No, I'm banning him.
23:01 Speaker 04 Oh, I'm hoping to come to the tour.
23:03 Speaker 02 We'll get your tickets from, we'll get your tickets for London. Glasgow, yeah, we'll get your tickets for Glasgow.
23:08 Speaker 04 Thanks, guys. Well, actually, I've got an idea that I'd like to run past you, if you pardon the pun. And obviously I'm running a marathon, running past you, George looking confused, is it running thing?
23:20 Speaker 02 Yeah, now I get it. Excuse me, I insult you, you don't get to insult me, that's how this works.
23:26 Speaker 04 I'm running a marathon at the end of April, I don't know if you know.
23:29 Speaker 03 If only you'd mentioned it.
23:30 Speaker 02 Yes, we are.
23:31 Speaker 04 And I've got this idea where I'd love to go for a run in each city that we do a live show in.
23:38 Speaker 03 Oh, but you're not coming.
23:40 Speaker 04 I don't know if you remember earlier in the year when I asked for friends for Diego on a WhatsApp group and no one replied. So before I set it up, I'd love to know if anyone would would join me.
23:51 Speaker 03 To be fair, this is a good idea because this would give you something to do in the show whilst we're doing the show.
23:57 Speaker 02 So you want to run with, any listeners in the area?
24:00 Speaker 04 So nine AM after the show.
24:03 Speaker 03 Are you sure?
24:04 Speaker 04 So Cardiff, nine AM on a Saturday, and Glasgow, nine AM on a Saturday.
24:08 Speaker 02 If you miss the bus, we're going without you.
24:10 Speaker 04 And if I miss the bus, then you're going without me.
24:12 Speaker 03 Well, you want to do a long run, you can just run from Cardiff to London.
24:14 Speaker 02 I thought you were going to say, can we do a whip round, do you want to get some little?
24:18 Speaker 04 I'd love it if you could, if you wouldn't mind holding a bucket for the donations.
24:21 Speaker 02 No one has cash anymore.
24:23 Speaker 03 No. Well, Ben, that sounds like a lovely idea.
24:25 Speaker 04 So, yeah, if anyone is interested in joining me.
24:27 Speaker 03 How do they, how do they get in touch with you?
24:28 Speaker 04 We'll get into sexinmyboss.com/contacts and if you can just write a little message, say which night you're coming and then say you fancy.
24:34 Speaker 02 My only worry is there'll be some lovely Jane Devers that'll turn up and be like, no, some good roots, and then there'll be Gary. Or just one bloke in Glasgow.
24:43 Speaker 03 Hiya, Ben.
24:44 Speaker 02 Hi, Ben.
24:46 Speaker 04 As long as he's got his running shoes on and he's welcome.
24:48 Speaker 02 You're right, little soror, aren't you, Ben? You want me to rub a bit of deep heat in on those buttocks? That's my only worry and we will not be responsible for that.
24:57 Speaker 04 No one's responsible but me.
24:58 Speaker 02 So if you get bummed by Gary on a run, not our problem. Can we all agree with that?
25:03 Speaker 04 Thanks for the support.
25:04 Speaker 02 There you go.
25:05 Speaker 03 This is on the provisor that we allow you to come on the tour.
25:07 Speaker 04 Yeah, so I've still got a bit of work to do, but I just wanted to sort of see, sense check.
25:11 Speaker 03 We'll watch that inbox explode now with with emails.
25:15 Speaker 02 And if you are a Gary in Glasgow and you want to bum Ben, definitely get in touch.
25:19 Speaker 03 Yep. There's an app for that.
25:23 Speaker 03 I'm told. We've had a lot of correspondence regarding this first subject, but we'll go with the G and D of called Jordan, who's got in touch to shed some light about not eating before having surgery. Hi, boys. I was listening to your most recent podcast in which Jordan was getting ready for his operation. And I thought I'd chime in about the whole food and drink before surgery situation, being a doctor working in intensive care and anesthesia.
25:45 Speaker 02 Kept me waiting all bloody, I got there at 11 o'clock.
25:47 Speaker 03 Did you film yourself under anaesthetic, singing the Spice Girls like I asked you to?
25:51 Speaker 02 No, because it's not like, no, I got there at 11 o'clock. I didn't go down till half four.
25:57 Speaker 03 What?
25:57 Speaker 02 Yeah, I was bloody starving. I barely managed not to eat until the night before. Bloody starving. And an anaesthetist said to me just before, as he put it, put the stuff in, as he put it in.
26:09 Speaker 03 Yeah.
26:10 Speaker 02 He went. Try not to dream of the bong man. And I went.
26:13 Speaker 03 Oh, God.
26:14 Speaker 02 And I went, ah, yeah.
26:15 Speaker 03 There's always one. Anyway, the, Jordan continues, the comments about food and drink affecting your anaesthetic are partly true. We find that people who enjoy a few too many alcoholic beverages often need higher doses to stay asleep. Don't worry, we monitor you closely to know if you need more medication. Not eating within a certain timeframe is to stop anything in your stomach, rising up and getting into your lungs. Once you're off to sleep, it can be pretty harrowing if it happens.
26:39 Speaker 02 Oh, jeez, fair play.
26:41 Speaker 03 Good, good that you found that out afterwards. Love the pod. You're a joy to listen to on my commutes to work. Jordan from Australia.
26:46 Speaker 02 Going, thanks, Jordan, for, for an anaesthetist to say, or a doctor working in intensive care to say it's harrowing that that happens. That's a fair point. And they, they were very serious about it. I rung up and said, can I have a black coffee that morning? He went, no, you can't. It's just water. But have you ever been under?
27:03 Speaker 03 Yeah.
27:03 Speaker 02 It's weird, isn't it? Because I was just like.
27:06 Speaker 03 Can't really remember it.
27:07 Speaker 02 No, one minute I was just like chatting away and he said that about the bong man. And then I thought, right, I'll just close my eyes here to help me get to sleep. And then that was it.
27:13 Speaker 03 Hmm.
27:14 Speaker 02 That, it's so weird. I genuinely think that's what it's like when you die. He's gone. You don't remember, you just go.
27:21 Speaker 03 Well, I hope not, yeah. I hope it's quick, however it happens. Do you ever think about how you're gonna die?
27:26 Speaker 02 I don't like to.
27:27 Speaker 03 No. Tia has messaged us with an update from New Longton Cricket Club.
27:31 Speaker 02 Oh, yeah, I used to have many 21st and 30th, uh.
27:35 Speaker 03 Indeed.
27:36 Speaker 02 And New Year's Eves.
27:37 Speaker 03 Lovely, just a very diverse venue. She says, hello, William Jordan, executive producer Ben Etal. I was listening to your most recent episode where Jordan mentioned he's had many a celebration at New Longton Cricket Club. As it happens, my parents and their best friend frequent New Longton Cricket Club regularly.
27:50 Speaker 02 Oh, I used to work for the builder I used to work for, I lived across the road from it.
27:53 Speaker 03 Was that the one where you sent you out to get all those things that didn't exist?
27:57 Speaker 02 Yeah, fallopian tubes.
27:58 Speaker 03 Tin of tartan paint.
27:59 Speaker 02 Yeah, I don't know, I never felt the tartan, Skyhawks and a long wait. And fallopian tubes were worse.
28:07 Speaker 03 In fact, I sent a clip to my parents where Jordan mentioned his love for the establishment as a venue for many a 30th, New Year's Eve, et cetera. Surprise, surprise, my dad and his bestie were actually in the cricket club later that day. So they played the clip to the people that were there.
28:19 Speaker 02 I've not been here in a few years, so all me mates play for the footy team as well. They've got New Longton Cricket Club Football Team.
28:27 Speaker 03 Lovely, this rolls off the tongue. It sounds like you may well have some new Jane Divas of the cricketing variety. Oh, I wonder which side they bat for. They were bowled over. Love the podcast, keep up the laughs and I look forward to seeing you in Manchester on the tour. That's from Tia.
28:42 Speaker 02 I might see you in New Longton Cricket Club.
28:43 Speaker 03 Yes, we should all go.
28:44 Speaker 02 Beautiful village, just suburbs of Preston.
28:49 Speaker 03 Yeah.
28:50 Speaker 02 Really nice. You'd like it. Most of my mates are back home, live there.
28:55 Speaker 03 Lovely. Zoe, his message in to inquire as to how we like to flavour our meat. Dear my favourite dilemma daddies, my partner and I are both regular listeners of your podcast and recently whilst out for dinner at Miller and Carter, we had a thought. How would William Hampson approach the lettuce wedge they serve alongside the steak?
29:11 Speaker 02 I love that lettuce wedge now. They cook lettuce, who'd have thought cooking lettuce would be nice?
29:15 Speaker 03 It's the cabbage.
29:16 Speaker 02 Yeah.
29:16 Speaker 03 It's easy for you to say with your teeth out. Furthermore, what flavour would you and Jordan choose? Flavour what? What flavour sauce? We would greatly appreciate any advice on how to eat the lettuce wedge with proper etiquette next time we attend the establishment. Many thanks, Zoe. Zoe, I have no idea what you're on about, but I will look it up and I will come back to you.
29:34 Speaker 02 Well, you mean the steak, so me I'm.
29:36 Speaker 03 Well, I know how to eat a steak, I mean, I can advise you on that.
29:38 Speaker 02 A medium rare.
29:39 Speaker 03 Yeah.
29:39 Speaker 02 But in Spain, that's for medium, because they're rare. Still got teeth.
29:44 Speaker 03 Okay.
29:44 Speaker 02 Yeah, right. Sauce is peppercorn for me.
29:49 Speaker 03 Can I say something?
29:50 Speaker 02 Hmm.
29:50 Speaker 03 And Jonathan told me this, and I actually sort of agree. You only really need a sauce if it's a bad piece of meat.
29:55 Speaker 02 No, I disagree.
29:56 Speaker 03 If it's a good piece of meat, you don't need a sauce.
29:57 Speaker 02 No, only a bit for the, the chips and stuff, and a little bit. You don't pour it on it though.
30:02 Speaker 03 It's ketchup or mayonnaise.
30:02 Speaker 02 I do agree with him, you don't pour it on, you just pour a little.
30:04 Speaker 03 Definitely not, yeah.
30:05 Speaker 02 Or dip it.
30:06 Speaker 03 Pop it on the side, yeah.
30:07 Speaker 02 Peppercorn, Diane is alright.
30:10 Speaker 03 Duh, three eighties.
30:11 Speaker 02 Steak Diane, innit?
30:12 Speaker 03 Yeah, yeah, yeah, Diane, yeah.
30:14 Speaker 02 Yeah, or, what's that, bollard?
30:17 Speaker 03 Not bolognese, bernese.
30:18 Speaker 02 Yeah, I'm not a big fan of that.
30:20 Speaker 03 Oh, I quite like bernese, that would be the one I'd choose. Or a creamed horseradish.
30:23 Speaker 02 Horseradish.
30:23 Speaker 03 I did a lovely, what do you mean, vegetarian chipping in over there?
30:28 Speaker 02 Horseradish is a vegetable.
30:30 Speaker 03 Yes, but where do you have horseradish if it's not on steak?
30:33 Speaker 02 Vegeta- vegetarian roast.
30:36 Speaker 03 Really?
30:36 Speaker 02 Yeah.
30:37 Speaker 03 Okay, I'll take your word for it.
30:39 Speaker 02 What's a vegetarian roast, you stuff roast without the meat?
30:42 Speaker 03 Basically.
30:43 Speaker 02 Hmm. To be fair, I'd have, and you can have stuffing, stuffing's vegetarian.
30:47 Speaker 03 Depends what stuffing. You're lucky, yeah.
30:48 Speaker 02 Yeah, you can have the sage and onion stuffing.
30:51 Speaker 03 Yep.
30:51 Speaker 02 I'd just have that, man, I'd be happy with that.
30:53 Speaker 03 Just the stuffing.
30:59 Speaker 02 When we went for a Sunday dinner a few weeks ago, I wasn't happy with the amount of gravy you used. But yeah, um.
31:06 Speaker 03 Well, just a, a little super song. I did, again, in my weekend that I had suddenly not in Paris, I did, uh, I went and got a joint of beef. And I used my new meat probe that you insert fully into the meat and you cook it with it in the oven. So it tells you when it's at the right temperature. Excellent. Very good.
31:22 Speaker 02 They're also good if you're ill them, if you haven't got a mouth thermometer.
31:26 Speaker 03 I'm not sure that's how they're designed.
31:28 Speaker 02 Honestly, if your boss is like, can you prove it?
31:32 Speaker 03 I just.
31:32 Speaker 02 Use one of them.
31:33 Speaker 03 Just get one off Amazon.
31:34 Speaker 02 Give it a wipe afterwards.
31:35 Speaker 03 Yeah.
31:35 Speaker 02 Put it in dishwasher at least.
31:37 Speaker 03 You don't want to taste rump. Um.
31:39 Speaker 02 Uh, yeah, I don't know what, the, the question there is.
31:42 Speaker 03 Is the lettuce, we'll, we'll look into the lettuce wedge, I just, you cut it with a knife and fork.
31:45 Speaker 02 Hmm.
31:46 Speaker 03 There used to be a thing that you don't eat salad with a knife, but that goes back years ago and is, it's like hundreds of years ago and it's not a thing anymore. So you can just cut it normally. And we discussed ultrasounds after a G and Dva had a nurse who put the probe into the wrong hole a few times. Another G and Dva got in touch to say that when they'd had the same internal scan, luckily the scanner got it right the first time, they dimmed the lights, which was good for their modesty and comfort as it can feel a bit vulnerable, but it did feel a bit odd as if the nurse had opted for mood lighting.
32:14 Speaker 02 I wondered why they dimmed the lights. Is that like when you watch a film in your house?
32:18 Speaker 03 Dim the lights, you know, like the lighter candle.
32:20 Speaker 02 Yeah.
32:21 Speaker 03 The wand, oh yes, I wanted to know this. The wand is about 25 millimetres in diameter, often covered-
32:27 Speaker 02 It's like a pen.
32:28 Speaker 03 Yeah, I guess.
32:29 Speaker 02 That's about a pen, no, is it?
32:31 Speaker 03 A bit thicker than that. A chunk, a sharpie maybe. Often covered with a disposable lubricated sheath for hygiene. In case anyone was wondering about having a similar procedure, it was very quick and simple and not as awkward as it may sound.
32:43 Speaker 02 Yeah, nothing covers it.
32:44 Speaker 03 As long as they find the right hole.
32:45 Speaker 02 Yeah, they know what they're doing. These professionals.
32:48 Speaker 03 Other than that one.
32:48 Speaker 02 Other than-
32:49 Speaker 03 Who are anonymous G and Dva was unfortunate to have. And our final response comes from a listener who we gave some advice to recently regarding her partner's friend who invited himself to stay on their sofa for the weekend. Huge thank you, Willie and Jordan, for answering my question recently about my boyfriend's friend staying on our sofa. I stood my ground and asserted my boundary-
33:09 Speaker 02 Oh yeah, remember this.
33:10 Speaker 03 Very hard for people pleaser, and my boyfriend messaged his friend. In the end, the friend stayed the whole weekend with his girlfriend.
33:16 Speaker 02 What, he's got a girlfriend?
33:18 Speaker 03 And my boyfriend even admitted he was thrilled to have our own space. Thank you for helping me keep my boundary.
33:23 Speaker 02 That's what we do. We're your dilemma daddies. That's what we do. You're agony ants, you're-
33:29 Speaker 03 Spunky servants.
33:30 Speaker 02 You're spunky servants.
33:32 Speaker 03 Solution sluts, I think we've been.
33:33 Speaker 02 We're your solution sluts. We don't just say it for no reason. We genuinely help people's lives. Literally, we are like God and Jesus.
33:42 Speaker 03 Wow.
33:44 Speaker 02 And let's-
33:45 Speaker 03 I don't know what to say.
33:46 Speaker 02 And let's finish.
33:47 Speaker 03 Can I just ask which is God, which is Jesus?
33:50 Speaker 02 You'd be God.
33:51 Speaker 03 Thank you.
33:51 Speaker 02 I'd be Jesus. Can I be the Holy Spirit? You can be Mary.
33:55 Speaker 03 You can be Mary Magdalene.
33:56 Speaker 02 And wash our feet.
34:00 Speaker 02 Let's finish with our comment of the week. This can be a comment from Spotify, YouTube or any of our socials.
34:07 Speaker 03 Before we get to our favourite one, the honourable mentions go to Marat, who commented, "Sending Mr North wishes for a speedy recovery for his wisdom tooth operation. William and Ben will surely be there to meet all of his post-op needs."
34:20 Speaker 02 Pre-op, they weren't that great, so post-op, they've not been much better.
34:26 Speaker 03 Zoe commented-
34:27 Speaker 02 How do you know if I've got my wisdom tooth out? I've not mentioned it.
34:30 Speaker 03 No. "When we come to tour, should we ask the person sitting next to us if they're from Jordan's guest list? Yes if they're in Manchester, because statistically, they will be."
34:39 Speaker 02 Can I just say, she sent my guest list today. So you know it was literally written on the back of an envelope, Stuart, which by the way, she sent me a guest list today. She's just put-
34:49 Speaker 03 What are we on?
34:50 Speaker 02 Bless her. She sent it today. God, she just messaged, she wants a jacket from M&S, for God's sake. And she wants me to use my Sparks card. Right. She's put guest list, and I went, can I have everyone's names? She's put mum and dad, grandma and Nigel, Jessica and Jason, Summer and boyfriend. I'm like, I need everyone's full names.
35:14 Speaker 03 Full names, yeah.
35:14 Speaker 02 Full names to the ticket. She wants to palaver this. I think I just put Michelle and Bill. I'm like, need everyone's-
35:20 Speaker 03 Well, I know Michelle and Bill. Some of those other people, other than your parents and your grandma and Nigel, I've never heard of them alive.
35:25 Speaker 02 Well, neither have I. Think how I feel.
35:27 Speaker 03 Well, why are they on flipping guest list?
35:30 Speaker 02 Ruth and Dave.
35:32 Speaker 03 Who are Ruth and Dave?
35:33 Speaker 02 I know Ruth and Dave. Carol and Mick are coming. Oh, Mick and Carol.
35:37 Speaker 03 Oh, Carol and Mick would do a good show then, if Carol and Mick are coming.
35:40 Speaker 02 Hey, hey, if Carol and Mick are coming, we're in for a good night. Because them two won't mind me saying this, they're two biggest pisspots you'll ever meet.
35:47 Speaker 03 Right. You know, we are doing two separate after-parties in Manchester.
35:50 Speaker 02 Are we?
35:50 Speaker 03 Yeah.
35:51 Speaker 02 Oh, actually.
35:51 Speaker 03 We are now.
35:51 Speaker 02 Oh, if Carol and Mick are coming, we're in for a good night. Yeah, maybe do-
35:56 Speaker 03 We've got your after-party and then the one the rest of us will go to.
35:58 Speaker 02 Yeah, do ask if you're on my guest list. And if they're being loud, tell me as well, because we got told one time they wouldn't shut up talking.
36:04 Speaker 03 But our comment of the week goes to Ollie, who regarding what Ben would be if he were a Spice, said, "Maybe Ben could be a bay leaf. You're not quite sure whether it does him a thing, but you keep using it just in case."
36:16 Speaker 02 Yeah, that's true. What do bay leaves do?
36:19 Speaker 03 Oh, I put a lovely one in my chicken alocachatura the other day.
36:22 Speaker 02 Who?
36:23 Speaker 03 Chicken alocachatura.
36:24 Speaker 02 Will he play tennis?
36:25 Speaker 03 No, no, it was nice, but that that required bay leaves.
36:27 Speaker 02 Oh, okay.
36:28 Speaker 03 You tasted lovely, Ben.
36:30 Speaker 02 All right, yeah. What do bay leaves do?
36:32 Speaker 03 No, not bay leaves.
36:34 Speaker 02 That's what they do. I've seen, seen on Channel Five, what they do. But bay leaf, when I do my hairy bag is chili recipe, God bless you, Dave. And I always throw in a bay leaf because it says, I'm like, what's that doing?
36:46 Speaker 04 Just a je ne sais quoi.
36:48 Speaker 03 Yeah, it just sounds a little something.
36:49 Speaker 04 It's hard to put your finger on.
36:52 Speaker 02 Right, that's me. Sorry, I'm swallowing up.
36:54 Speaker 03 It's all right. Just read the rest of the script and you can be put out of misery.
36:57 Speaker 02 Remember, you can listen to new episodes every Tuesday and Friday and 24 hours before anywhere else on Global Player. If you want to get in touch about something that isn't a dilemma or a problem, drop into our DMs or send us an email to [email protected] . There's a bit of a whisper. We also love hearing back from people we offer advice to. So if that's you, do get back in touch and we'll speak to you on Tuesday.
37:19 Speaker 03 Goodbye.
37:20 Speaker 02 Goodbye.
37:27 Speaker 00 Confidence. It's listening to your gut. It's moving forward even when the path ahead is unclear. For nearly 160 years, Pacific Life has helped people keep their promises, building confidence for generations. Whether you're confident in your financial future or just beginning to envision it, we're here to help. Ask a financial professional how. Pacific Life, the power of a promise. Pacific Life Insurance Company, Omaha, Nebraska, and in New York. Pacific Life and Annuity, Phoenix, Arizona.
38:02 Speaker 07 The midpoint of life, a time to celebrate. Take stock and ask what's next. I'm Gabby Logan and on Life at the Midpoint, I'm joined by famous faces who share how they're navigating this stage of life. Plus, experts with advice on change, challenges and everything in between. And I'm tackling your dilemmas and questions as we figure it all out together. Listen every Tuesday and Thursday. Search for Life at the Midpoint.
Previous Help I’ve Been Probed In The Wrong Hole | And Jordan’s Got A Swell On Next Help His Allergy Gives Me The Ick | And William Needs To Grow Up Page updated October 31, 2026 · transcript and summary are machine-generated