Bob's One Man Show

The spotlight gets turned over to Bob as he performs a one man show, written just for him by Mark and Wade. Get set up quick and connect to their fast speeds. Learn more at uber.com/onourway Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

• 0:00Speaker 00

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• 0:28Speaker 01

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• 0:59Speaker 02

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• 1:28Speaker 03

  This episode of Distractible is presented by T-Mobile 5G Home Internet. Okay. How do you guys know when someone's really your friend? I don't know.

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• 2:14Speaker 05

  Good evening gentle listeners or watchers and welcome to Distractible. This episode, Winky Wade small talks trash and mispronounces literally everything. Marvelous Mark devises and enforces this hilarious attempted humiliation ritual. That big brave Bob walks on glass and gives a tour de force by emphatically dancing through the trials of the Terror Twins. From a frenzied intro to a father's love. Heh heh heh heh heh. It's time for Bob's One Man Show. Now sit back and prepare to be distracted and enjoy the show.

• 3:00Speaker 04

  Read all instructions in parentheses aloud. Hello and welcome to Distractible. My name is Bob Milkynips and I will be your host on today's episode. It's gonna be a fire one today, filled to the brim with milk goodness from your favorite Milky Man, Blorb. Blorb? Ha! Oh man, I must be sleepy or something. Let me try that again. Hi there and welcome to Distractible. My name is Blorb Muncher and I'm gonna post you today. Whoa, Epi Alarm, I didn't sleep so good. What did the baby and all descend into 1920's gangster accent? Yeah. A little, wait, hang on, do I know that accent? A little crime alert that one, just another one of the boys, but if he tries to make

• 3:41Speaker 04

  a move on me's, plural possessive, he's gonna be sleeping with the fishes. And by fishes, I mean the stuffed fish toy I gave him for his turd birthday. That hasn't happened yet. That was my own parenthetical. Did somebody say turd? Welcome to the eighth of turd member, turdember. Welcome to the 12th of plunge, timber. Alternates for the right date to hit, read all of them in sequence. Welcome to the 15th of flush, timber. Welcome to the 93rd accurate date reforbatum of poop, timber. Welcome to the 22nd of dire, ember. I'm your host, you should be out of the gangster accent by now. Big bass, sassafras, and I'll be guiding you through my impeccable and topical one man show.

• 4:23Speaker 04

  Hey wow, can you imagine the amount of work I've put into making this something special for you? Please stand up and twirl like a ballerina.

• 4:35Speaker 04

  I had to read all this ahead of time. Slam both palms on your desk and act surprised. Make pog face. What's pog face? Give me an example. Okay. Oh, my good gravy gracious, I nearly forgot to tell you. This should be shouted. If you didn't shout it, please read again and shout. I shouted, right?

• 4:55Speaker 03

  No.

• 4:56Speaker 06

  No.

• 4:57Speaker 04

  Okay. Oh, my good gravy gracious, I nearly forgot to tell you. Wow, wow, wow, wow. This is so exciting for me to deliver you this incredible news. Clarity on previous instruction, it was to read and then shout. If you went back to reread but delivered the lines in a shouting manner, please go back and read each word individually with a scream of fear in between each word. If you somehow managed to do it as instructed, go back and do it anyway, starting with the palm slamming on the desk and add a small bounce in between each word as you shout.

• 5:29Speaker 04

  Oh, ha, my, ha, good, ha, gravy, ha, gracious, ha, I, ha, nearly, ha, forgot, ha, to, ha, tell you, you, ha. This part, this should be shouted. This ha should ha be shouted, ha, if you. What? No, go on. Okay. Wow, ha, wow, ha, wow, ha, wow, ha. This ha is ha so ha exciting ha for me ha to ha deliver ha you ha. This ha incredible ha news.

• 6:05Speaker 06

  Are you clear of the shouting? You're good.

• 6:07Speaker 04

  Okay, so that instruction's over?

• 6:09Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, it's over.

• 6:10Speaker 04

  Okay, I'm joined by my good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good. You may not skip a single one of these. Good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good. Good. Friends, Mark, Mark, Fishbok, and Wade. He does have a real car that exists, Barnes. Twirl and gesture elegantly to both of your co-hosts. Bow reverently, blow kisses, clap your hands with glee and giddiness. Allow your overlords to introduce themselves.

• 6:49Speaker 04

  What was the next one?

• 6:54Speaker 03

  Aw, man. Thank you, Bob. I hate to intrude on your one man show. Uh, but Wade, I'm, I don't know if you caught that, but, uh, I think you missed a good.

• 7:05Speaker 06

  I think there was a missed good.

• 7:07Speaker 03

  I think there was one missed good.

• 7:08Speaker 04

  I counted them with my fingers.

• 7:10Speaker 03

  So I think he should go back to the top and take it run again. We'll just edit.

• 7:16Speaker 06

  Oh, now hold on by top.

• 7:18Speaker 04

  Read all instructions in parentheses aloud. Hello and welcome to Distractible. My name is Bob Milkynips and I will be, don't say things if you don't mean them.

• 7:26Speaker 06

  You said top, Ben. I don't know.

• 7:29Speaker 03

  All right. We'll forgive you for that one. I mean, you know, we, we mess up these intros all the time, but I'm Mark.

• 7:35Speaker 06

  Can you tell who wrote the intro, Bob?

• 7:37Speaker 04

  I have a guess. I know which one of you uses words like reverently and glee and giddiness. It was Amy.

• 7:45Speaker 03

  Uh, but yeah, Wade.

• 7:46Speaker 06

  Hey, man. Thank you for the great introduction. Appreciate that. Hopefully you got your, uh, your energy going. You're wide awake, ready to go.

• 7:54Speaker 04

  I'm Epi. Didn't you hear me?

• 7:56Speaker 06

  Yes.

• 7:56Speaker 04

  Sorry, am I not supposed to interject? Am I just supposed to sit quietly?

• 7:59Speaker 03

  Ah, you're the host, man.

• 8:01Speaker 06

  Yeah, you are. This is your show.

• 8:03Speaker 03

  It's your show.

• 8:04Speaker 06

  We're just here to tell you when you do it wrong, to yell at you, laugh at you and make you suffer. The rest is all you.

• 8:09Speaker 03

  Well, anyway, we, uh, we are all here to enjoy. All right. We're, we're gonna torture you.

• 8:15Speaker 04

  Uh, I hadn't guessed that yet.

• 8:18Speaker 04

  That first part was all good fun.

• 8:20Speaker 03

  It was. It was really, I really had a great time. The shouts of fear between each word was so much better than I imagined it to be.

• 8:28Speaker 06

  I actually thought you might knock yourself out with.

• 8:33Speaker 04

  I am sweaty already, so that's a bad start.

• 8:35Speaker 03

  That's good. That's good. Well, we can, we can let you relax. So, uh, why, why, I mean, usually we do small talk, so we, uh, we could.

• 8:43Speaker 04

  I shattered a glass on my foot right before this.

• 8:46Speaker 03

  Hmm.

• 8:46Speaker 06

  Just to feel something or?

• 8:48Speaker 04

  No, just, just to scare the shit out of myself. And then the dog and then the baby all came home all at once and we're all glass on the floor.

• 8:57Speaker 03

  Stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp.

• 8:58Speaker 04

  Put it in your mouth, whatever.

• 9:00Speaker 06

  That's fun. Was it at least empty so that way there wasn't mess on top of mess?

• 9:05Speaker 04

  I can't even explain why, but it was full of magnets, which didn't really cause any problems. It's just weird.

• 9:10Speaker 06

  I have no further questions. Yeah. Why was the glass full of magnets? Okay.

• 9:14Speaker 04

  They were fridge magnets, but like they weren't on the fridge, but they were designed to go on the fridge, but that's where we keep them.

• 9:20Speaker 03

  Oh, I have a little update. This, this arrived, this thing.

• 9:24Speaker 04

  Oh shit.

• 9:26Speaker 03

  But I haven't used it yet, so I have no idea if it's any good.

• 9:29Speaker 04

  Okay. I thought you were about to absolutely blast them.

• 9:31Speaker 03

  No, but I will. Don't worry. I'm.

• 9:33Speaker 04

  Did you see they've made a couple of TikToks being really hyped up?

• 9:36Speaker 03

  Yeah. They're jumping the gun a bit on whether or not I'll like this or not. Yeah. They're getting a little excited. I don't know. Oh yeah. This comes, this comes. That's fine. It's, I don't think that.

• 9:46Speaker 06

  I can't hear you. So it sounds like you're just mumbling crazy.

• 9:49Speaker 03

  That's because I'm so far away. I can't. All right. So, uh, Wade, you got any news before we jump into this beautiful?

• 9:57Speaker 06

  Uh, yesterday was garbage night. That's it.

• 10:00Speaker 03

  That's the most exciting thing in your life. All right. We'll save it for the next one.

• 10:03Speaker 04

  You know, when you were over at the house last weekend and we had kind of too much food for everyone and we put out a big plate of shrimp and zero people ate any shrimp.

• 10:13Speaker 06

  I remember seeing shrimp, but yeah, I believe that.

• 10:15Speaker 04

  Shrimp makes garbage smell so fucking nasty.

• 10:19Speaker 06

  Yeah, it would. Any seafood would. Yeah.

• 10:21Speaker 04

  We like, we ate as many as we could, but then some of them ended up going bad and our whole, for like a day and a half, our whole fucking garage smelled so bad. I should have chucked them in the freezer or something, but I was like, ah, it's like trash day tomorrow or the next day or something and just put them in the trash like an idiot.

• 10:37Speaker 06

  We have similar issues with, uh, heaters using potty pads. Turns out cooped up in a humid, hot garage does not smell great.

• 10:46Speaker 04

  Yeah. You gotta really bag that stuff up.

• 10:47Speaker 06

  Yeah. Even, even bagged up, just a little leakage.

• 10:51Speaker 04

  Gotta, you gotta, you gotta really seal those or any single leak is a problem.

• 10:55Speaker 06

  Yeah. That brand new car smells shifting real quick to something else.

• 10:59Speaker 04

  Bobby warmed up. How could I not be?

• 11:01Speaker 03

  All right, good. Welcome to Guess, what was the name of the other episode? Guess that animal. Animal guess. Guess the, guess the animal.

• 11:11Speaker 04

  It was your episode. What are you looking at us about?

• 11:13Speaker 03

  I can't rem- I never know what their names. I have no idea what that was called.

• 11:17Speaker 04

  I'm pretty sure it was called, what animal was that that you heard just now?

• 11:20Speaker 06

  It was probably called like Bob Meows at 22 minutes or something. It was probably something like that.

• 11:26Speaker 03

  Well, anyway, so we didn't have time to source up any animal noises. So Bob, you're gonna be providing the animal noises.

• 11:32Speaker 04

  Sure, sure.

• 11:33Speaker 03

  Yeah, we're gonna tell you what the animal was, and if we guess what it is, we get a point.

• 11:37Speaker 04

  I feel like you should know what it is if you're gonna tell me what it is.

• 11:40Speaker 03

  I don't know.

• 11:41Speaker 04

  Oh, do I get to pick whatever animals I want?

• 11:43Speaker 03

  Uh, yeah. Why not? Unless Wade, you had another way you wanted this going.

• 11:47Speaker 06

  No, I mean, I had some stuff listed, but we can totally let him.

• 11:50Speaker 03

  All right, Bob, here's how it's gonna go. We're gonna give you a list of these animals. You can't look them up, but we're sure that you know them. You're gonna do an impression of those animals. We're gonna have to guess which one it is, and whoever guesses will get a point.

• 12:07Speaker 06

  Why is it spaced like this?

• 12:09Speaker 03

  I'm formatting. I literally said there's a bit of a formatting error. I'm going to fix it. It's because of docu- what do you mean? You're looking at the same document I have.

• 12:18Speaker 06

  Oh, what happened? What went wrong?

• 12:20Speaker 03

  I was trying to fix it, but then you were like, whoa, those documents.

• 12:24Speaker 04

  How is this causing strife between you two?

• 12:27Speaker 06

  Cause I find it hilarious.

• 12:29Speaker 03

  It's fine, it's fine. All right, Bob, are you ready?

• 12:31Speaker 04

  Oh, yeah.

• 12:32Speaker 03

  Oh, I'm gonna kick your butt, Wade. All right, don't tell us the name of what it is, we'll guess.

• 12:38Speaker 04

  All right, yep, I got it. In no particular order.

• 12:46Speaker 06

  Oh, Mark, I gotta guess for this one.

• 12:48Speaker 03

  Oh, you gotta guess? Ah, damn.

• 12:49Speaker 04

  That's it, that's the whole sound.

• 12:51Speaker 06

  I think that's the sound. Are we just guessing now?

• 12:53Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah, I guess.

• 12:54Speaker 06

  The Dickinsonia.

• 12:56Speaker 04

  You wish.

• 12:57Speaker 03

  It's the Jagged Terrier.

• 13:00Speaker 04

  It's pronounced Jagged Terrier, but no, it's not that.

• 13:02Speaker 06

  Why do we have to be the ones to pronounce these? I picked some of these things to make him pronounce them.

• 13:06Speaker 03

  Cause he has to make the animal noises, man. Do you wanna make the animal noises?

• 13:10Speaker 06

  Oh, what a twist of events now.

• 13:13Speaker 03

  Come on, you can read these.

• 13:14Speaker 06

  All right, uh, X.

• 13:19Speaker 06

  Is that the one?

• 13:20Speaker 04

  No. Here, let me do it again. Think, think, what sounds like this? Ow, ow.

• 13:29Speaker 03

  I know what it is. Dang Buzz, bamboo worms.

• 13:32Speaker 04

  Yes, thank you.

• 13:34Speaker 03

  Yeah, you're keeping track of points, right?

• 13:36Speaker 04

  Me?

• 13:37Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 13:37Speaker 04

  Sure, sure, sure.

• 13:38Speaker 03

  All right, wait, I'm gonna kick your butt this episode.

• 13:40Speaker 06

  Apparently, I, man, how'd you, how'd you get?

• 13:43Speaker 04

  What else sounds like that? That sounds like worms.

• 13:45Speaker 03

  I mean, it could have been the, the Alasapoo, you know, the Fertile Ant Snake is like an embryo or something like that.

• 13:53Speaker 06

  Will wax you.

• 13:54Speaker 04

  Do you guys have any points yet?

• 13:56Speaker 03

  I do.

• 13:56Speaker 04

  Yeah, aside from the one.

• 13:58Speaker 06

  Probably tons.

• 13:59Speaker 04

  Uh, all right, next one.

• 14:04Speaker 03

  Could be anything.

• 14:10Speaker 06

  It's your guess first. I went first last time.

• 14:12Speaker 03

  It's gotta be the Fertile Ant Snake.

• 14:13Speaker 04

  That is not what snakes sound like.

• 14:15Speaker 03

  Dan.

• 14:16Speaker 06

  The Pescuit's Parrot. Blackylo Parrot.

• 14:19Speaker 04

  Pescay's Parrot? No, it is not that.

• 14:22Speaker 03

  Is it the Red-tailed Cuckoo Bumblebee?

• 14:24Speaker 04

  Is that one animal?

• 14:26Speaker 06

  No.

• 14:27Speaker 03

  That is one animal.

• 14:28Speaker 04

  Uh, it's not either of those, or if that's one animal, it's definitely not that.

• 14:32Speaker 06

  Been married for seven years. Is that Molly?

• 14:35Speaker 04

  She's not on the list. Oh, she is on the list.

• 14:37Speaker 06

  Sometimes.

• 14:38Speaker 04

  It's a hard to pronounce one. Do you wanna, yeah, do you want a clue? It's hard to pronounce.

• 14:43Speaker 03

  Gomphotherium.

• 14:45Speaker 04

  It's not hard to pronounce.

• 14:46Speaker 06

  It's hard for me.

• 14:47Speaker 04

  Gomphotherium.

• 14:50Speaker 04

  I'm sorry, what?

• 14:53Speaker 04

  Nope, keep going. No, I, I don't know what you were saying. Keep trying.

• 14:57Speaker 06

  Oh.

• 14:57Speaker 03

  Cephalaspis.

• 14:58Speaker 04

  Cephalaspis? Oh, no, it's not that.

• 15:02Speaker 06

  Okay.

• 15:03Speaker 03

  It's a Vestal Cuckoo Bumblebee.

• 15:06Speaker 04

  No, but I like how many bumblebees there are on this list.

• 15:10Speaker 06

  Uh, you said it's hard to pronounce. Yorkeye Pooh.

• 15:13Speaker 04

  Yorkey Pooh? The dog breed, Yorkey Pooh?

• 15:18Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 15:19Speaker 04

  No, it's not that.

• 15:23Speaker 04

  Cook off, cook off!

• 15:25Speaker 06

  These impressions just aren't great. It makes this tough.

• 15:28Speaker 04

  I feel like this is gonna be spot on when we check this one.

• 15:31Speaker 06

  Ica dip these?

• 15:32Speaker 04

  No.

• 15:33Speaker 06

  No? Ah, damn.

• 15:34Speaker 04

  No. It's two words.

• 15:36Speaker 06

  Eared gravy, greby, grebe.

• 15:39Speaker 04

  No.

• 15:41Speaker 06

  It's Hammond's Flycatcher.

• 15:43Speaker 04

  No.

• 15:44Speaker 06

  No. Damn. Seshuan taken, Tibetan taken, two words, just ones in parentheses.

• 15:51Speaker 04

  Two sets of two words. No, you guys are really digging all the way down until it's gonna be the last one that is two words.

• 15:58Speaker 06

  I got it, I got it. It's a Ketsal coatlus nothrope. No, that can't be it.

• 16:04Speaker 04

  That is it. You guys are idiots.

• 16:07Speaker 06

  Hey, whoa, hey!

• 16:08Speaker 04

  It's the Quetzal co- Quetzal cotless nothrope. It's a dinosaur bird. You know what Quetzal cotless is? Wait, how did you know what that was? Cause I know what the fuck a Quetzal cotless is! Cause it's a kinda dinosaur thing and James likes dinosaurs!

• 16:23Speaker 06

  I didn't know we had dinosaurs on this list. I'm not gonna lie. I didn't either. I didn't actually look at what the animals were. I didn't either. I just picked up fun names. Alright, well, that's to me, I'm not...

• 16:36Speaker 04

  I feel like you were trying to make me look stupid and it's really backfiring.

• 16:40Speaker 06

  This is a little, I get it now, the "fromph" was clearly big leather wings, I see, yeah, mhm. Well, you're gonna look like a fool when you do another impression. This is gonna look bad on you and not us. Glad we thought this one through. Yeah, did we do this a little wrong? We should make him guess his own impression. That doesn't make sense.

• 16:59Speaker 06

  We should have warmed up.

• 17:00Speaker 04

  I've got one. I've got one. You ready? You got your listening ears on?

• 17:05Speaker 06

  Yep.

• 17:15Speaker 04

  This one is spot on.

• 17:17Speaker 06

  Is it my guess?

• 17:18Speaker 04

  Yeah, it's your guess.

• 17:19Speaker 06

  Yeah, it's your. Oh, man, I know what I think it is. It's gotta be a source.

• 17:24Speaker 04

  Obviously, it's a source. Yes, thank you.

• 17:26Speaker 03

  It could. It could have been a zonkey.

• 17:28Speaker 06

  It could have been.

• 17:29Speaker 03

  Unless that goes Z's on. Ah, dude, I'm sorry. I don't want to ruin the. It's not my impressions. I apologize.

• 17:34Speaker 04

  All right. Well, I'm gonna cross that off the list now.

• 17:37Speaker 03

  All right, that's good. There were two Z's anyway.

• 17:40Speaker 04

  Let's see. I don't know that this one specifically makes a lot of noise, but I'm gonna try, try and capture the soundscape of this animal.

• 17:54Speaker 03

  It's a northern alligator lizard.

• 17:56Speaker 04

  Point for Mark.

• 17:57Speaker 03

  Yep. Ah, see, I got that one. Cause I got the, the big.

• 18:01Speaker 04

  He's a chomper.

• 18:02Speaker 03

  Yeah. If it had a Canadian accent, I feel like I would have, it would have gotten it faster, but it's close.

• 18:07Speaker 04

  Yeah, that's fair. I don't know how you chomp with Canadian accent, but that's fine.

• 18:11Speaker 06

  A, a.

• 18:14Speaker 03

  That's the best Canadian impression I've ever had in my life. A, a.

• 18:20Speaker 04

  Where do you keep your zebras, eh? Chomp?

• 18:22Speaker 06

  I'm toast if I, uh, if, if it's the best impression wheel.

• 18:26Speaker 04

  I got your, are you ready for this one?

• 18:28Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 18:29Speaker 04

  It's the, it's the physical and the, and the sound. Okay, it's the whole thing. Never mind, I'll find someone else like you.

• 18:37Speaker 06

  Oh, thank God, it's my turn. Adele's Penguin.

• 18:40Speaker 04

  It's not. Yeah, it's Adele's Penguin, obviously.

• 18:43Speaker 03

  I mean, it's Adel's Penguin.

• 18:45Speaker 04

  Adele's Penguin.

• 18:47Speaker 03

  Yeah, for a one man show, I feel like it suddenly became on us, Wade. I've.

• 18:50Speaker 06

  Yeah, I really flipped. We did a terrible job at this.

• 18:52Speaker 04

  You, you made you guys the guessers.

• 18:55Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 18:56Speaker 04

  I'm nailing these. All right, Mark, I'll give you a softball.

• 18:59Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 19:05Speaker 06

  Oh, Mark, I know this one. It's the epic rap battles of history, guys.

• 19:10Speaker 03

  All right, okay, all right.

• 19:18Speaker 03

  Is it the Jage Terrier?

• 19:20Speaker 04

  No, man, I like where your head's at.

• 19:22Speaker 03

  Oh, come on. How is that not? Oh, I know what it is. Oh.

• 19:26Speaker 06

  Oh, this is clearly the Yorkie poo.

• 19:28Speaker 04

  That's correct, sir.

• 19:31Speaker 03

  Oh, no, my coinbase with. troll code. Someone's hacking into my crypto.

• 19:37Speaker 04

  Oh, bro, you're so cooked right now.

• 19:39Speaker 03

  I'm cooked. I'm cooked. Don't click on those texts, especially when you don't have one.

• 19:44Speaker 04

  Yeah, since I don't use any crypto platforms at all, I find it really easy to avoid those scams, but alright.

• 19:53Speaker 04

  Oh, I know this one. I know this one.

• 19:58Speaker 04

  But small.

• 20:00Speaker 03

  Was it me first?

• 20:02Speaker 04

  But real small, small. I know this won't help you at all, but there's a movie about this animal. And the main character, which is this animal, is voiced by Lin-Manuel Miranda.

• 20:12Speaker 04

  No.

• 20:13Speaker 03

  Damn it.

• 20:16Speaker 03

  Sisyphusisipulus, uh, Molly.

• 20:22Speaker 04

  Dude, if there was a biopic about Molly voiced by Lin-Manuel Miranda, I'd watch it. I'd even call it a biopic.

• 20:30Speaker 03

  So was that wrong?

• 20:31Speaker 04

  That's wrong.

• 20:32Speaker 03

  Okay. You into therium?

• 20:40Speaker 03

  You're right.

• 20:41Speaker 04

  How are you gonna make the noises before we're even guessing them right now? It's just cheating out here.

• 20:48Speaker 03

  Damn it. Is it Gomphotherium?

• 20:52Speaker 04

  No.

• 20:54Speaker 03

  Sichuan Taken.

• 20:56Speaker 04

  It's not Sichuan Takeout, no. You want a hint?

• 20:59Speaker 03

  No.

• 21:00Speaker 04

  Hot on the trail, why would you need a hint?

• 21:02Speaker 03

  Yeah, exactly. It's gotta be Opabinia.

• 21:06Speaker 04

  No.

• 21:07Speaker 03

  Ah, fuck.

• 21:08Speaker 06

  Kinky Jow?

• 21:11Speaker 04

  Yes, it's pronounced Kinkajew. Jesus Christ.

• 21:14Speaker 03

  How is that small?

• 21:15Speaker 04

  They're small. They're small. They're like little purse monkeys. They're tiny.

• 21:19Speaker 03

  I don't even know what it is. How do you know these animals?

• 21:22Speaker 04

  Cause there's a child's movie about a Kinkajew that's voiced by Lin-Manuel Miranda. And it has some really actually pretty good music in it.

• 21:29Speaker 03

  I doubt that very much.

• 21:31Speaker 06

  Miranda from Mass Effect, Ivan Sturhovski?

• 21:33Speaker 04

  What's that called? It's not called Sony. It's by Sony Pictures. What's that called?

• 21:37Speaker 06

  Naughty Dog, uh, EA, ooh, 20th Century Fox, uh, Paramount.

• 21:43Speaker 04

  It's called Vivo. His name is Vivo.

• 21:45Speaker 06

  I'm so close.

• 21:48Speaker 00

  New and exclusive holiday decor just launched online at the Home Depot. Check out the viral Grand Duchess collection with smart holiday lights you can control from your phone. Easily customize the twinkle across trees, wreaths, and garlands to match your holiday vibe. Create stunning light effects, then switch it up with the tap of your fingers. Even the man in red will be impressed. Shop the holiday decor you want online only at HomeDepot.com.

• 22:19Speaker 01

  Born from the intensity of a night in the eternal city. Introducing Born in Roma Fragrances by Valentino. Feminine perfume Donna Born in Roma features juicy black currant, central jasmine, soft cashmerin, and warm vanilla. Masculine leaning but unisex Womo has notes of fresh violet leaf, aromatic sage, green vetiver, and mineral salt. Shop holiday gifts at Macy's.com.

• 22:49Speaker 06

  This episode is brought to you by Uber. You know that feeling when someone shows up for you when you need it most? Yeah, we all need that sometimes. And Uber knows that. Uber isn't just a ride or a meal delivered, it's showing up no matter what.

• 23:01Speaker 03

  I think that might be them knocking on the door and because they're, you know, Uber's really good about getting them right to where you are. Dude, them or the FBI, I'm not 100% sure.

• 23:10Speaker 04

  Yep.

• 23:12Speaker 06

  When it really matters, whatever it is, you show up. Or there's a will, we're on our way. Uber, on our way. Download the app today.

• 23:22Speaker 03

  All right, well, I think, wait, I think we should move on because we're getting our ass kicked.

• 23:26Speaker 06

  I think we should move on immediately. Forget this, that could never happen. Editors make Mark and I look good during that part.

• 23:30Speaker 03

  Yeah, exactly. All right, so Wade, you introduce your next, uh, your next.

• 23:34Speaker 06

  So one of the, the episodes of all time of Distractible was Bob's Fridge. So we can't do a whole episode on it because this is one man show, we have other stuff to do. So I need you to do a super fast retelling of Bob's fridge, but without using any verbs.

• 23:50Speaker 04

  Do I get a script or synopsis or anything?

• 23:52Speaker 06

  No, no, no. You get to have lived it and retell it from memory.

• 23:56Speaker 03

  Yeah, but no verbs.

• 23:57Speaker 06

  And what do you think, Mark? We should put like one minute on the clock for him?

• 24:00Speaker 03

  Oh, you can have more than one minute. We can give him, it's a long story. You know, we'll, we'll just give him like, if he runs on too long, like it shouldn't last longer than three minutes, but we'll give him some time.

• 24:12Speaker 04

  No verbs is gonna be hard, but I think I can do it maybe.

• 24:15Speaker 06

  You got it.

• 24:17Speaker 04

  Oh, hey, we're here to, yeah, oh, hang on, uh huh. Right now? Oh, never mind, I'll, gotta, yeah.

• 24:29Speaker 04

  Oh.

• 24:33Speaker 04

  Fridge, two guys, front door, me, the

• 24:42Speaker 04

  one guy. Oh, no, no, thank you, oh, there you go, side yard, you guys, fridge, yeah, yeah, perfect, and then the bush.

• 24:57Speaker 04

  Hey, hey, inside.

• 25:01Speaker 04

  The bush, the bush, the fridge, the bush.

• 25:11Speaker 04

  Oh, what's that? Oh, no, oh, your water shut off? That's a noun.

• 25:19Speaker 03

  You're right, you're right, you're right, I can, I got it, okay, you're good.

• 25:22Speaker 04

  A new house, I don't know, it should be water shut off, make this here.

• 25:32Speaker 04

  Sorry, bush.

• 25:38Speaker 04

  Did I, that part? Yeah, anyway, I don't think that's how you, the fridge, house. Right?

• 25:47Speaker 03

  Thinks of her, isn't it, I think.

• 25:49Speaker 04

  Not when I do it.

• 25:56Speaker 04

  Anger.

• 26:03Speaker 04

  Unacceptable.

• 26:08Speaker 04

  Two guys.

• 26:12Speaker 04

  Fridge.

• 26:13Speaker 03

  That was beautiful. Oh, man.

• 26:16Speaker 04

  I don't remember what, not that much actually happened. I was just so mad. I kept talking about it.

• 26:21Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah. I mean, it's amazing what verbs will do to pad time out. That was, uh, that was good.

• 26:27Speaker 06

  I think in the original, there was a lot of, it's your house. You gotta know where this is. Just call a previous homeowner.

• 26:34Speaker 04

  Oh, that's right. Yeah, we're friends. We get dinner. I have for each Tuesday or something.

• 26:39Speaker 06

  You know what, though? Beautiful retelling. I think everyone knows exactly what happened based on that retelling.

• 26:44Speaker 04

  Do they?

• 26:45Speaker 03

  All right. We've got another game for you here. It's, uh, one, one we've never done before. Uh, Wade just made it up right here on the spot. Do you have a D20?

• 26:56Speaker 04

  Yeah, I got, I got one in here. Okay, I got one.

• 26:58Speaker 03

  Can you roll that D20?

• 27:00Speaker 04

  I did.

• 27:01Speaker 03

  I want you, or we want you. Wade came up with this mostly, but, uh, we want you to give us a sales pitch on various things that we're going to offer up to you. And you only have as many words as you rolled to sell it to us.

• 27:16Speaker 04

  That's deeply unfortunate.

• 27:18Speaker 06

  What'd you roll?

• 27:18Speaker 04

  Four.

• 27:20Speaker 06

  All right.

• 27:23Speaker 04

  Man, I really considered rerolling that for a second.

• 27:26Speaker 06

  No, no, it's perfect. It's perfect. All right, Wade, you, you kick it off. Well, in four words, thanks to your role, you need Mark and I to buy this broom.

• 27:36Speaker 04

  Dirty floor? Here, dumbass.

• 27:45Speaker 03

  All right. That's great, man. Yeah, roll again.

• 27:48Speaker 04

  Oh, I get to reroll? Thank God.

• 27:50Speaker 03

  No, you get another thing.

• 27:51Speaker 04

  Oh, 13.

• 27:53Speaker 03

  Oh, 13. Okay, this'll be great. Sell us on flip flops in exactly 13 words.

• 28:00Speaker 04

  For clarification, is flip flop one word? It's hyphenated?

• 28:04Speaker 06

  Well, it counts as one word. It's, it's the topic. Yeah.

• 28:06Speaker 04

  I'm not selling you anything yet. This is not an attempt to sell.

• 28:10Speaker 06

  I think flip flop counts as one word because it's the word that we're giving you.

• 28:13Speaker 04

  Shoes too tight? Flip flop. It's hyphenated, right? One word. Flip flop. Hyphenated.

• 28:19Speaker 03

  Yeah, but you have 13 words.

• 28:21Speaker 04

  Oh, I got the new number. Oh, shoes too tight? Flip flop? Good, cuz lots of space in flip flop. All right?

• 28:33Speaker 04

  I forgot I was doing four words again. I, yeah.

• 28:36Speaker 03

  That was great. Yeah. Lots of room in flip flop.

• 28:39Speaker 06

  What a bold start. Where's it going from here?

• 28:41Speaker 03

  It's the beauty of salesmanship. You just make it personable. You know, you're just like, all right, buddy. Yeah, you got it. Wait, wait, you got the next one?

• 28:50Speaker 06

  Oh, yeah, man. I need another roll from you, Bob.

• 28:52Speaker 04

  Fifteen.

• 28:54Speaker 06

  That's too bad. That's too bad. Good for you. In fifteen words or less, you need to sell us an aquarium. Not like a whole aquarium you go to, but like, you know, an aquarium you keep by your fish.

• 29:05Speaker 04

  Where are you gonna keep those stupid fucking fish? Right inside this awesome aquarium. I was fifteen, didn't?

• 29:15Speaker 06

  I'm at fourteen. What are you at, Mark?

• 29:16Speaker 04

  Buddy.

• 29:17Speaker 06

  Buddy?

• 29:18Speaker 04

  Pal.

• 29:19Speaker 03

  All right, buddy, you got me. All right, all right, great. Excellent, excellent, man. You're doing so good.

• 29:26Speaker 04

  I got another four.

• 29:28Speaker 03

  Ooh. Four words. Sell me on condoms.

• 29:33Speaker 04

  Who even wants babies?

• 29:40Speaker 03

  All right, bye, bye, bye.

• 29:43Speaker 04

  Oh, come on, seven.

• 29:45Speaker 06

  Uh oh.

• 29:46Speaker 03

  Uh oh. What'd you do?

• 29:47Speaker 06

  All right, in seven words, unfortunately, we're stealing three of them. Rasputin's preserved penis.

• 29:55Speaker 03

  And if you don't know what this is, I can show you a picture.

• 29:58Speaker 04

  One era penis for sale.

• 30:05Speaker 04

  I don't know what that is. Is it actually a penis?

• 30:07Speaker 03

  Okay, so it's if you Google this, which I recommend everyone at home do. Rasputin's preserved penis. Uh, I won't share it for the sake of the editors, but everyone can go just Google that. It is unconfirmed if it is at all real.

• 30:25Speaker 04

  Why wouldn't it be real?

• 30:26Speaker 03

  Some have said it's an animal penis of some type. Uh, or some kind of amalgamation of something or another. Uh, but there it is.

• 30:35Speaker 06

  I like that there's several women looking at it like, oh, and there's one guy that's like.

• 30:41Speaker 03

  By several women, you mean the picture of the same woman or?

• 30:44Speaker 06

  No, there's two. There's one on the top row for me. And then there's like the blonde lady is like peering over the side.

• 30:50Speaker 03

  That is the piece. I do believe was Rasputin like doing his thing before World War One, but it's it's of the era.

• 30:57Speaker 04

  Wasn't he that wasn't that the start of World War One?

• 31:00Speaker 03

  No, that's Franz Ferdinand.

• 31:02Speaker 04

  Oh, close enough.

• 31:03Speaker 03

  Rasputin was the the advisor to one of the people in Russia.

• 31:08Speaker 04

  1916 murder, World War One era.

• 31:11Speaker 03

  I mean, I'm I'm giving it to you.

• 31:12Speaker 06

  He was assassinated in 1916.

• 31:15Speaker 03

  All right, roll again.

• 31:16Speaker 04

  Eighteen.

• 31:18Speaker 03

  Eighteen. That's almost too many. All right. Braces.

• 31:22Speaker 04

  Those crooked ass teeth ain't gonna fix themselves. Put some of this metal shit in there.

• 31:30Speaker 06

  I got eighteen, I think.

• 31:31Speaker 03

  Oh, God.

• 31:32Speaker 04

  Crooked ass teeth ain't gonna fix themselves. Ten. Put some of this metal shit in there. Eight.

• 31:39Speaker 03

  Some of this metal shit in there. That's only seven.

• 31:43Speaker 04

  Some some of. I didn't say some as one word for me. I said some of this metal shit.

• 31:48Speaker 03

  Okay, yes, absolutely.

• 31:50Speaker 04

  If you give me one more word, I know what I'd add. Pal.

• 31:53Speaker 06

  Can't be done. We can give you another dice roll.

• 31:56Speaker 04

  Two. Oh.

• 31:57Speaker 06

  How you feel about number nine for this?

• 31:58Speaker 03

  Go for it.

• 31:59Speaker 06

  In two words, you have to sell us a used kidney.

• 32:03Speaker 04

  Still works.

• 32:09Speaker 03

  Hmm, I don't I got a buddy that needs a kidney. Yeah.

• 32:13Speaker 04

  That's the most valuable kind, the working kind.

• 32:16Speaker 03

  Roll one more time.

• 32:17Speaker 04

  Thirteen.

• 32:18Speaker 03

  All right, you sold me a condom. I want you to sell me a used condom.

• 32:23Speaker 06

  How many words? Thirteen?

• 32:24Speaker 03

  Thirteen.

• 32:25Speaker 04

  Yes, this is a used condom. Be not afraid. It still works.

• 32:32Speaker 06

  But, well?

• 32:33Speaker 03

  Yes, this is a used condom.

• 32:35Speaker 04

  Yes, this is a used condom. Be not afraid. Oh, that is 12. Partner.

• 32:46Speaker 03

  We've got a real nice one for you, Bob. A really good one to finish it off.

• 32:52Speaker 04

  Am I rolling again?

• 32:53Speaker 03

  No, no, no, no. You, you, we, we won this game. We won. Uh, thank you, kind host, for giving us that game. And now, what we need from you is the thing that everyone loves from Bob. The name Bob is synonymous with a rage-fueled tirade that goes on and on and on and on. We're going back to "Don't Get Me Started."

• 33:21Speaker 04

  Oh, hooray.

• 33:22Speaker 03

  Okay, and we only have one, we only have one suggestion for this.

• 33:26Speaker 06

  We do?

• 33:27Speaker 03

  Well, we'll see how the first one goes.

• 33:32Speaker 03

  All right, Wade, do you want to give them the suggestion? Nope.

• 33:40Speaker 03

  Well, I want you to "Don't Get Me Started" on Spotify!

• 33:48Speaker 06

  And we have to keep you in line?

• 33:53Speaker 04

  Don't even get me started on Spotify. Gonna ease into it.

• 33:58Speaker 06

  Careful!

• 33:59Speaker 04

  You're fine, you're fine, you're fine. I have one low-level gripe and a long list of high-level gripes. We'll start with the low-level one. Green logo? Green? Really? Green? That's the green logo? Are you sure? I said it was a low-level gripe, but it's just ugly. Like, this is not, this is maybe personal taste. I'm not get too worked up about this. But they're really sticking to the green logo. If you look at the list of apps on your phone, or your computer, or wherever, you see a lot of other green shit in there? You see a lot of green popping up aesthetically pleasing green? No, you don't. No, everyone's gone the other way. Green is a terrible choice. It's ugly. I hate it.

• 34:44Speaker 04

  Anyway, the working conditions.

• 34:53Speaker 04

  Wait, wait, wait, wait.

• 34:57Speaker 04

  No, I don't want to go down that path. The working conditions are fine. The working conditions are great. They're great. Everyone's really happy, but the residuals for artists.

• 35:09Speaker 04

  They're great. They make, they're fine. I've only heard good things. I've only heard good things. I'm, I'm pretty sure that, uh, I can't think of any notable artists who've had any gripes with Spotify. AI slop. Hmm.

• 35:25Speaker 04

  Allegedly, and probably false if we're honest with ourselves. There's just, just channels and channels of artists that are not real people. Allegedly, they are just AI generated slop. Allegedly, they sound almost indistinguishable from regular music, except that also they're completely uncanny. Allegedly, they just randomly get worked into whatever playlist you're listening to. If it's on shuffle or auto, whatever the hell. Allegedly, that's some bullshit. And also allegedly, but, but Spotify, what else do they do? Oh, shuffle. What a joke.

• 36:07Speaker 04

  Whoever programmed your shuffle feature, try again. Wrong. It's not a shuffle. It's just a predetermined order that it always plays in. If you start the same playlist from the top of the list and hit shuffle, it always plays the same fucking songs. How do you even do that? That doesn't even make sense. Just use some input that's different every day. Like the time or the date or what? It's like they've generated one random number and we're like, that's enough seeds. Just use this one every time or what? How does that happen? And why isn't it fixed? This is tough, guys.

• 36:46Speaker 04

  Have I talked, have I talked recently about how much I love Spotify? Have I told you guys that?

• 36:51Speaker 06

  Should we not even get you started?

• 36:53Speaker 03

  It doesn't have to be angry. That's the thing. It is just don't even get me started on.

• 36:57Speaker 04

  Three lines in the logo? If it wasn't green, I'd be there already.

• 37:05Speaker 04

  Don't even get me started on Spotify. They think they have competitors? Nobody competes with Spotify. What are those other music apps called? You don't even know, cuz you never used them. You just put Spotify on there and that's the one you click on, you go use Spotify. All the best artists who matter are on Spotify and any of them who aren't on Spotify are probably garbage. Honestly, I know it's controversial. I just don't have a lot of feelings about Spotify. I'm not gonna lie. I don't know how long you thought that was gonna go, but like, they're a company. I think we all know how we feel about companies. They're the best.

• 37:38Speaker 06

  Mark, what do we do next?

• 37:39Speaker 03

  I'm writing his outro. Hold on.

• 37:41Speaker 06

  Great, alright.

• 37:42Speaker 04

  But did you have another thing for me to rant about that was worse than Spotify?

• 37:46Speaker 06

  Well, well, wait. Yeah, there's another thing on the list. James. Knowing that he will definitely see this in a couple of years.

• 37:57Speaker 04

  Don't even get me started on James.

• 37:59Speaker 03

  Oh no.

• 38:00Speaker 04

  I don't think anyone would keep loving me endlessly and without any reason whatsoever they could possibly determine if I continued to shit my pants on a daily basis. I don't know why he thinks he's gonna keep getting away with it. Listen here, mister. One of these days, that's gonna be enough shit in the pants. I can't tell you when, but I'm just gonna snap and then there's gonna be no more poop in the pants. And another thing. He always wants attention. He always coming up to me and be like, dad, dad, look, dad, you're my hero. Dad, I love you so much. Dad, dad, dad, dad, dad. Take it easy, okay?

• 38:42Speaker 04

  Calm down. Lots of people love me. I get it from all sides. I don't need it when I get home from work, alright? Just take a breath. You got two parents. I don't see you, well, actually, probably all over your mom more than you're on me, but I don't see you all over the dog like you're all over me. And she's easy. You drop food for her all the time accidentally. Just give her some Cheerios and she'll let you do like whatever. She don't even care. Man, I'm really trying to think of a third thing.

• 39:12Speaker 03

  It's okay cuz we, I wrote here, do you remember on Unus Honest where I was going through Ethan's like maze and there was a bucket of fish? And I was like, I'm not doing that. And he was like, that's okay. Boundaries are important. We wrote that.

• 39:29Speaker 06

  Literally did. That's fine. That's fine. I, I, I, I'm almost done with this. I have your outro. I think, I think we could close it up. This is beautiful. Ah, that was great, Bob, but I think it's time to wrap up this episode. Uh, I, I just took it away.

• 39:47Speaker 04

  Oh my God, that's a lot of scrolling up. All right. Oh, Lord, oh Lou, what a show through and through with vim and vigor and a big smile or two. I am so pleased. I am so teased. Twink your nipples and sing Black Eyed Peas. Tonight's gonna be a good night. Can you see that I was tweaking my nipples?

• 40:09Speaker 06

  I thought you were commanding us. I didn't get this script.

• 40:11Speaker 04

  Hee hee, whoo hoo, chim chim and a charoo. Oh, long pause. I didn't.

• 40:17Speaker 06

  Oh, thanks.

• 40:19Speaker 04

  Charoo. Oh, ho, ho, ho, ho, ha, ha, ha, ha, ye. These two best friends of mine and not vice versa, really showed such an incredible performance. Riff about Mark's performance while performing a 10 out of 10 perfect driving crooner. What's that?

• 40:37Speaker 06

  Don't know what a driving crooner is. Oh, this.

• 40:39Speaker 04

  No, what is that?

• 40:40Speaker 06

  It's a bit from that show, the guy that I think he should leave. And it's, okay, wait, you can Google it. What the fuck a driving crooner is either?

• 40:48Speaker 04

  Is that the stickers on the window?

• 40:50Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 40:52Speaker 04

  Okay, so it's like the fedora and the cigar stickers on the window and then you like.

• 40:57Speaker 06

  Don't worry, the editors will put it there for you.

• 40:59Speaker 04

  Okay, editors, driving crooner me. Is there a voice that goes with this or something?

• 41:03Speaker 06

  No.

• 41:04Speaker 04

  Oh, I don't know what this is. Oh, oh, Mark. Mark, you did so great today. Must have earned five times as many points as Wade because of all the correct guessing and all of the good dice rolling you made me do and, and all of the watching. Couldn't have been better. That might've been the best episode Mark's ever had.

• 41:25Speaker 06

  Thank you, thank you.

• 41:26Speaker 03

  Low bar.

• 41:26Speaker 04

  No, high bar. The top 10 performances on Distractible are now all Mark. Push Bob's fridge right off the 10 spot into the bottom of the barrel. Wade only wishes he'd ever had a top 10 spot, but...

• 41:39Speaker 03

  I thought this was a co-hosting thing. Why is this so one-sided of an outro?

• 41:43Speaker 04

  This might as well be called Distractible and Friends, starring, featuring, presented by Mark, or some such.

• 41:51Speaker 04

  But how could that compare to the other competitor? Oh, I didn't read any further beyond the one that... Okay. Riff about Wade's performance while snapping your fingers like a cool jazz guy.

• 42:01Speaker 04

  He's just fucking, that one moment from filming in space. You just remember that one fucking thing, huh?

• 42:08Speaker 03

  Yep, yep, yep.

• 42:09Speaker 04

  Yeah. Yeah, Wade. Bald. Funny. Correct. Oh, yeah. Wade, you're so groovy. You're so jazzy. If peeing your pants is cool, I'd call you Wade Barnes. Because you don't pee your pants. You just win Distractible. Anyway, how could I decide? God, how could you burden me with this responsibility? I am a mere mortal, incapable of these monumental decisions. You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains. You raise me up,

• 42:52Speaker 04

  and now I'm something. You raise me up. Anyway, hee-haw. Here's the winners from the points.

• 43:05Speaker 03

  I'm an Emmy-losing writer.

• 43:07Speaker 06

  No wonder Mark's been unable to sleep this week. He was working on this.

• 43:10Speaker 03

  He's working on this so long.

• 43:13Speaker 00

  New and exclusive holiday decor just launched online at The Home Depot. Check out the viral Grand Duchess collection with smart holiday lights you can control from your phone. Easily customize the twinkle across trees, wreaths, and garlands to match your holiday vibe. Create stunning light effects, then switch it up with the tap of your fingers. Even the man in red will be impressed. Shop the holiday decor you want, online only, at homedepot.com.

• 43:44Speaker 01

  Born from the intensity of a night in the Eternal City. Introducing Born in Roma Fragrances by Valentino. Feminine perfume Donna Born in Roma features juicy black currant, central jasmine, soft cashmerin, and warm vanilla. Masculine leaning but unisex Womo has notes of fresh violet leaf, aromatic sage, green vetiver, and mineral salt. Shop holiday gifts at Macy's.com.

• 44:13Speaker 04

  Mark, you earned points for fuck, piss, fuck, fuck me, shit, god damn it, and bamboo worms. Wade, you earned points for, it's just a bunch of fucks, mostly. The final score being Bob with negative 10. I just sort of threw that in, I assumed that'd be where that was coming from, based on the script. Mark with 7, and Wade with 10.

• 44:40Speaker 03

  Oh shit!

• 44:42Speaker 06

  I knew it, I knew it.

• 44:45Speaker 03

  Oh my god, there's no way this could be a tie again and it land on another one man show.

• 44:50Speaker 04

  Fucking better not. That would, you know what though, based off the coin flip and all the bad luck I've ever had and everything, that would be...

• 44:57Speaker 06

  What if we just make the final score 11, 10, 9, and really tempt the fates?

• 45:01Speaker 04

  I'm the host, but you are the scripters, the creators? How many bonus pins will there be?

• 45:12Speaker 03

  Oh, I still, I could, I could have a chance here, I could have a chance, it's two, two for all the listeners.

• 45:18Speaker 04

  Uh, what am I adding to the bonus wheel, oh overlords?

• 45:21Speaker 03

  Ooh, uh, add, add a percent to the tie wheel.

• 45:26Speaker 04

  How, how much percent? 3, 20?

• 45:29Speaker 03

  Add 20? I mean, I guess it is, add 10, let's say add 10% to, and that's 10% of the whole pie.

• 45:37Speaker 04

  Add 10% to the one man show.

• 45:38Speaker 03

  Yeah, 10% chance. No way that'll come up.

• 45:41Speaker 06

  I know what I'm adding, my good chance, subtract 30% from one man show.

• 45:45Speaker 04

  One man show no longer exists. Alright, two spins.

• 45:50Speaker 03

  I don't want to host that shit.

• 45:52Speaker 04

  Oh, lie points don't count. Wow, we didn't have any lies, I don't think, this time, so, re-spin, I suppose.

• 46:02Speaker 04

  Fastest response?

• 46:04Speaker 03

  I mean, I had some pretty quick ones on the animal noises.

• 46:08Speaker 04

  One of you guys guessed the animal first try once or twice?

• 46:12Speaker 03

  That was me. I did that. I did that. Yeah. I think, I think I get this. I think I get this. I think I get it.

• 46:17Speaker 06

  I got Zor's, but I think Mark said was like, the moment you stopped, he just spouted one out, I think. So, yeah.

• 46:22Speaker 04

  All right. Point to Mark. Excellent. Excellent. One more spin. What could possibly go wrong?

• 46:27Speaker 03

  Come on, sudden death. It's a tie.

• 46:32Speaker 03

  Oh, give that to you, Bob. Give it to yourself.

• 46:34Speaker 04

  All right.

• 46:35Speaker 03

  All right. Well done, Bob.

• 46:37Speaker 04

  Plus one for me.

• 46:38Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 46:39Speaker 04

  Wow, that's not how you spell either of those words. Uh, anyway, that makes the final score. Mark with eight and Wade with 10, which means Wade gets to host the next one.

• 46:51Speaker 06

  Man.

• 46:54Speaker 06

  Well done, Bob. Well done.

• 46:55Speaker 03

  That was great. I mean, I had a great time. I had a great time. I had a really good time.

• 47:00Speaker 04

  I need a nap.

• 47:01Speaker 03

  I wanted to give people a taste of like when Tyler and Ethan scripted me my one man show. I just wanted to get that in there. I don't know how you turn the animal noises around on us, but I'm, uh...

• 47:11Speaker 06

  That really did flip. As soon as we had to guess, I was like, oh no. I picked names that I thought he wouldn't be able to pronounce. I didn't want to have to do it.

• 47:18Speaker 04

  I actually knew a lot of those animals. I was pretty surprised.

• 47:21Speaker 06

  Speed Retelling of Bob's Bridge with No Verbs was...

• 47:24Speaker 04

  Mark, loser speech?

• 47:26Speaker 03

  You know, I, I may have lost, but I don't feel like a loser. I think everybody won today, even though I actually lost. And yeah, I mean, I can see that. I was literally typing the outro as we were in the episode, so I can see that. I can see that. I can see it.

• 47:41Speaker 04

  Wade, winner speech?

• 47:42Speaker 06

  Don't know how we got here. Don't know how I ended up on top, but I'm glad to be here. Bald, winning, life's good. Remember to take out the trash. All the important things in life are just going my way.

• 47:54Speaker 04

  Does both of those, all of the important things, that's, that's it?

• 47:57Speaker 06

  Winning, bald and trash. I think that's in like the Declaration of Independence even.

• 48:01Speaker 04

  I remember the Nicolas Cage movie. I actually need a nap, but that's the end of the episode. Wade is gonna host the next one, cuz he won somehow. I didn't write any of your animals down. I was so impressed when you got the bamboo worms, Mark. I was really proud of you for that one.

• 48:14Speaker 03

  Thank you. Thank you. Thank you very much.

• 48:15Speaker 04

  That, that, that might've been worth four points.

• 48:18Speaker 03

  Might've been.

• 48:19Speaker 04

  Too late to find out. Viewers, listeners, make sure you follow the podcast so that you know when episodes come out. It'll give you notifications. You can follow Mark, Wade, and myself on our other social platforms and stuff. Anyway, that's the end of the episode. Wade, host the next one already.

• 48:34Speaker 06

  Okay.

• 48:35Speaker 04

  Until then, podcast out.

• 48:37Speaker 06

  Hey, everyone. Welcome to another episode of... Oh, not, not yet.

• 48:41Speaker 00

  New and exclusive holiday decor just launched online at The Home Depot. Check out the viral Grand Duchess collection with smart holiday lights you can control from your phone. Easily customize the twinkle across trees, wreaths, and garlands to match your holiday vibe. Create stunning light effects, then switch it up with the tap of your fingers. Even the man in red will be impressed. Shop the holiday decor you want online only at homedepot.com.

• 49:12Speaker 02

  What's the secret to being a great host this season? Keeping things deliciously simple, like mixing Simply Cranberry into a festive drink as guests arrive, or serving up a warm mug of Simply Apple on a chilly night. That means less time behind the scenes and more time in the moment with everyone. Crafted with real fruit, Simply juices and fruit drinks make any holiday drink effortless, inviting, and completely delicious. Simply. Say yes to Simple.