Bad Mood

The three angy boys discuss what turns each of them into grumpy-wumpy-wumpersons. Get set up quick and connect to their fast speeds. Watch Video Now: https://spotify.link/distractible Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

• 0:00Speaker 00

  This episode of Distractible is presented to you by T-Mobile 5G Home Internet.

• 0:05Speaker 01

  The folks over at T-Mobile have some big news for you. They now have the fastest 5G home internet, according to the experts at Ookla Speed Test.

• 0:12Speaker 02

  So if you want the fastest 5G speeds with a five-year price guarantee, visit t-mobile.com/homeinternet to check availability.

• 0:19Speaker 00

  Price guarantee exclusions like taxes and fees apply. Fastest based on Ookla Speed Test. Intelligence data, second half 2025. All rights reserved.

• 0:28Speaker 03

  Good evening, gentle listeners or watchers, and welcome to Distractible. This episode, Blasting Bob snubs Marvel, shows his ballistic brilliance, then begs to be therapized. Wicked Wade the Blower becomes Pennywise, gets funny fuzzies, throws tantrums, and rationalizes rage. New McMark predicts snow in paradise, plans a spring clean, threatens interviewees, people unpleases, and gets grumpy. From Goblin Mode to corporate stall meetings. Ha ha ha ha ha! It's time for Bad Mood.

• 1:10Speaker 03

  Now sit back and prepare to be distracted and enjoy the show.

• 1:21Speaker 01

  Hello and welcome to another episode of Distractible. That's right, I'm your host, the guy who's in this room today. No, it's not Mark, it's me. I'm in weird places. My name's Bob. I'm hosting because I won the last one, despite all that stuff I said in it. And I'm joined today, as always, by my two competitors slash co-hosts, Mark and Wade.

• 1:43Speaker 00

  Hi, I'm gonna say a bunch of stuff today. Who knows where it's gonna take me?

• 1:48Speaker 01

  Probably right to the top.

• 1:49Speaker 02

  I'm gonna say some stuff today, which'll take me to the top too, right?

• 1:53Speaker 01

  I'd almost guarantee, probably. Anyway, if you've never been here before, I always host this episode while sitting in an unpowered Halo Fire Team Raven arcade cabinet. That's why I have this thing in my hands. Also, as the host, I will be giving the boys some sort of game or prompt or whatever. We'll talk about it and I'll give them points, which I'll write down on this book thing. It's not my usual one, but whatever. And then there'll be a winner and they host the next one. That's how it works.

• 2:21Speaker 00

  Could I introduce some bias? Early on into the episode.

• 2:24Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 2:26Speaker 00

  Okay, so think about it this way, right? If I were to win, that would give me enough time now that I have all this free time and I'm probably gonna blast through all the Dungeon Crawler Carl books in the next like day or two. So I'll have a bunch of, I'll be so desperate for time. I'll be able to spend time to make the perfectest crime. Episode ready for the next recording session. Bang boom, it'll be the greatest episode distractable. You could be on the precipice. This obviously won't be the greatest episode distractable ever. Obviously, obviously. But if you fabricate a reality where I win despite all my shortcomings. Don't make a joke about that.

• 3:02Speaker 02

  You got tall comings, not shortcomings.

• 3:07Speaker 00

  Sound clip that forever. Clip that, send me the WAV file. I'm gonna use that in everything.

• 3:14Speaker 00

  I'll just send it to game developers. You're gonna, wait, you're gonna be playing a game and you're just gonna hear your own voice as a goblin comes.

• 3:22Speaker 02

  You're putting me in a game? I didn't know you were making one. Yay.

• 3:24Speaker 00

  No, no, I'm gonna send it to game developers. I'm not gonna do that.

• 3:26Speaker 02

  Oh, that'd be, I wouldn't even recognize me thankfully.

• 3:29Speaker 00

  Bob, if you make me win, all this can be not yours, but you know, mine.

• 3:35Speaker 01

  I'm one poor choice away from just declaring that Mark wins right now and ending all of our sufferings.

• 3:41Speaker 02

  That would be a record for shortest episode ever. I mean.

• 3:44Speaker 01

  Where would the fun be in that? And you might have a lie point on the books already for teasing us with the perfectest crime.

• 3:52Speaker 00

  Oh.

• 3:55Speaker 01

  Cause it's a lie. Anyway, how's it going? You guys got any small talk? Uh, Wade, you wanna introduce your own bias? You got any selling points?

• 4:01Speaker 02

  Hey, I'm Wade and as you heard, I'm wicked witch of the bald. So I'm here to entertain, scare and fly around on my snow blower. Cause that's what we have in Cincinnati. Snow shovels and blowers. But it's warm, the snow is melting and whenever it gets to be warm outside, I'm gonna go on my first outside walk of the year. Inside walks, not as fun. Outside walks, much more fun.

• 4:27Speaker 01

  Dude, outside walks, damn, that's crazy.

• 4:32Speaker 00

  I gotta tell you, it is so warm. It is so beautiful here in glorious Los Angeles. The rains that were coming through here, it just rained again yesterday. Rain? Rain, yeah, rain.

• 4:43Speaker 02

  I forgot, snow could be melted when it falls. Sorry, go ahead.

• 4:47Speaker 00

  Not only that, there's apparently an approaching cold snap that will bring snow to LA next week.

• 4:53Speaker 02

  Take it, take it.

• 4:55Speaker 00

  It's, it's probably only going to be up in higher elevations here in LA. But from what I hear, it's gonna dip down to the 40s and then the 30s here. And it's gonna be during a moisture event, so it's gonna be likely. I mean, they're already predicting on the mountain tops, it's gonna be full blanket snow coverage, like two feet of snow up on the top. But there's a chance we'll catch some flakes drifting our way, you know, just. And that would be, that would be astonishing. Amy is actually thinking of, actually, by the time this episode's coming out, this is already passed. So we'll know if we're buried and died and obliterated. But Amy's thinking of canceling a trip that she had because she's never seen snow here. It's like if she leaves and doesn't catch it, who knows when it would ever happen again.

• 5:39Speaker 00

  But then I said, I mean, obviously it'll happen again next year because this shit ain't gonna get better. So, you know.

• 5:47Speaker 01

  And isn't that just a fun, lighthearted joke we all love to laugh about?

• 5:55Speaker 00

  Anyway, I'm getting, I'm getting a new microphone as well.

• 5:58Speaker 01

  What kind of thing?

• 5:59Speaker 00

  Uh, so I'm trying out a different microphone because they discontinued, I mean, Blue just got bought by, uh, Logitech and so they discontinued a lot of the other models. And I, I never really liked this microphone that much anyway. So I'm trying out a Warm Audio, something, something, something, 8,000.

• 6:16Speaker 02

  That's a big number.

• 6:17Speaker 01

  That is a big number. All 7,999 of the other models must be jealous.

• 6:22Speaker 02

  I remember when Tony Starr got in the newest Iron Man suit and said, I hear you 8,000. That was my favorite moment. Laugh.

• 6:31Speaker 01

  I don't know enough things about Marvel to understand that joke. Sorry.

• 6:34Speaker 02

  It's, it was, it was aimed at a very specific member of the audience, just one. You got it, right? Tim?

• 6:40Speaker 01

  Hey, no, just because nobody likes your weird niche superhero movies doesn't mean it's a bad joke, buddy. I'm sure somebody got that.

• 6:47Speaker 00

  Anyway, in the relevancy of the now, you know, not then. I also realized that a lot of my peripherals in my computer setup are really jank and old. And I have spent a long time accumulating a lot of crap. Like my Xbox controller doesn't even have a cover on it anymore. And I don't know why I put batteries on it because I don't have a wireless dongle for it. Like, I don't know, man. Given that I have spent so much time and effort building up all this computer crap for all these render farms. I think I'm finally going to do an overhaul of my entire computer recording setup. Give it, give it some love. I'm going to clean up this stuff. I'm going to do a whole, whole polishing of everything. There's a bullet.

• 7:26Speaker 02

  Is it covered in goop?

• 7:27Speaker 01

  Is it goopy or post goopy?

• 7:29Speaker 02

  I don't know if you can show those on podcasts.

• 7:33Speaker 00

  Yeah, they definitely know gun podcasts where there's like walls of guns behind them. And there's just like guns on the table.

• 7:39Speaker 01

  Not that I'm aware of.

• 7:40Speaker 02

  I've never been able to see ourselves full frames. Whatever you just held up was completely not in sight for me.

• 7:47Speaker 00

  It was a big bullet, huge bullet.

• 7:49Speaker 02

  I believe it was like a point oh one.

• 7:52Speaker 00

  It's a five, seven.

• 7:54Speaker 01

  Six, seven, six, seven. He said the thing.

• 7:57Speaker 00

  Is it possible for bullets to just go off and?

• 8:00Speaker 02

  I mean spontaneous combustion is a thing. So I'm sure spontaneous shoot is a thing.

• 8:05Speaker 01

  I'm sure it's not impossible, but I feel like I'd be surprised if that happened with something like that. I don't know.

• 8:12Speaker 00

  But like, if it, if it fell and it hit something just right, that hit the firing pin with the bullet go off. Would it, it wouldn't be able to go with as much speed because it just be kind of like a.

• 8:22Speaker 01

  No, it wouldn't have, it doesn't have a barrel, right? It would only be propelled with whatever the casing could hold, but the casing would probably explode. It would probably not be good.

• 8:32Speaker 00

  Yeah, not great. Yeah.

• 8:34Speaker 02

  It's like those little Halloween or Halloween, those are the fourth of July fire poppers. You throw it to the ground, it's like.

• 8:39Speaker 00

  Just like that, I bet. I bet. I'll throw it real hard to the ground. I'll tell you what happens.

• 8:44Speaker 02

  But with metal fragments flying everywhere, which is probably good.

• 8:47Speaker 00

  Yeah, probably. Anyway, it fell off the desk the other day and I had that thought as it was going towards the ground. So I'm fine.

• 8:55Speaker 01

  That's fine. I'm sure it's fine. It wouldn't do that.

• 8:58Speaker 00

  With these huge bullets I got next to me, these gigantic, very manly, very red meat eating bullets, you know, around me.

• 9:06Speaker 01

  I wouldn't know anything about having weapons in my area.

• 9:10Speaker 00

  I see two blurs. I see one slightly blue blur and then I see some shiny off of it and then I see a.

• 9:16Speaker 01

  They're very cool arcade weapons. Don't you worry about it.

• 9:19Speaker 02

  Only weapon I need is luck.

• 9:23Speaker 02

  Don't have it. I got this day.

• 9:25Speaker 00

  No one laughed. No one laughed at that. No one.

• 9:27Speaker 02

  Tim? Tim?

• 9:29Speaker 01

  He feeds off your laughings.

• 9:31Speaker 02

  I do. I'm like Pennywise, except for instead of fear, I need laughter.

• 9:34Speaker 00

  So that actually reminds me, I had a pretty funny scenario. So I was, uh, I was working on cloak stuff. And we were interviewing someone for a new position and, uh, on my desk, uh, where I was interviewing, Jason had found a knife just in storage, like we were going through storage and there was just so happened to be a knife there. Wasn't mine, but he was like, this must be yours. So he's like, he said it on my desk as I'm getting this guy that's being interviewed in, coming in and on the desk is a big fucking knife. Like it's like a foot long with a, with a letter on it that says, hey, found this knife and I sharpened it for you, Jason.

• 10:15Speaker 00

  I had to go to the guy like, well, I, this isn't an intimidation thing. It's just, it's, I don't know where this came from. I, I've never seen this before.

• 10:24Speaker 02

  So let's talk salary.

• 10:29Speaker 00

  Anyway, it was very understanding. So, um, it all worked out. No one, no one was threatened or scared or anything.

• 10:34Speaker 01

  That's exactly what someone who was very threatened and scared would say.

• 10:38Speaker 04

  Yes, Mr. Mark. I'm not scared, Mr. Mark.

• 10:40Speaker 02

  How do you know that guy? I've met every Jason in the planet.

• 10:45Speaker 00

  No, that's, Jason wasn't who I was interviewing. The guy I interviewed didn't.

• 10:48Speaker 02

  I met every interviewee in the planet.

• 10:51Speaker 04

  I just want to sell some shirts.

• 10:54Speaker 00

  Love your designs, Mr. Mark. Your voice sounds so familiar. Oh, well.

• 11:00Speaker 02

  You're hired. Now you're fired. Here's your severance pay.

• 11:05Speaker 00

  Oh, that's good. That's better than the joke I was gonna make.

• 11:07Speaker 02

  I know it was good because you both laughed so hard at it.

• 11:12Speaker 01

  It wasn't funny. It was just legit.

• 11:15Speaker 02

  You know, there's an epic rap battle with George Carlin versus Richard Pryor. And one of the things is like, when I tell jokes, people laugh. When you tell jokes, people go, hmm, that's funny. I feel like I'm the guy people go, hmm, that's funny. The compliments of like not laughing but being told, man, funny. Really the same. I feel so warm and fuzzy inside. People tell me funny.

• 11:37Speaker 00

  I do that. I feel like I do that a lot and I apologize because I do go, no, that's funny. I do that a lot.

• 11:44Speaker 02

  I get that a lot here. Yeah, I don't know.

• 11:45Speaker 01

  You do that to me too. Wait a minute.

• 11:47Speaker 00

  Oh, no, but to you. No, it's really funny when it's you.

• 11:51Speaker 02

  Wait, hold on. What do you mean really funny?

• 11:53Speaker 00

  Look, you're both really funny. Trust me.

• 11:55Speaker 02

  Oh, okay. Thanks.

• 11:57Speaker 00

  Oh, no, I fell for it again.

• 12:02Speaker 00

  I got a low sense motive against his charisma rolls. Yep. Everything else, all my other stats way low, but my charisma.

• 12:08Speaker 01

  I can't wait to hear your new microphone, Mark. I'm sure I'll notice.

• 12:14Speaker 00

  I mean, I don't, I doubt that it's gonna sound any better, but I think from a functionality standpoint, it'll just be a little nicer. That's all I'm really hoping for because this one, it has like this weird swivel head on the top part of it. But there's no real point to that. And I feel like all in all, the ergonomics of this thing are just like, I don't like the way I have it. It's not very elegant and it bothers me.

• 12:35Speaker 01

  Not this microphone, but my mic at my home desk setup is, it sounds good. It's a good mic, but it's really tall. And then it has like a big ball thing on top and like, it's just real awkward. I get that it's aesthetic. It looks cool, but I don't care. I don't want it on camera. I'd like if it was much more compact and ergonomically designed.

• 12:59Speaker 02

  I'm using a Newman. It's a Newman T L M one oh seven, I think.

• 13:03Speaker 00

  He's using a Newman.

• 13:05Speaker 01

  Haven't you had that so bitch forever?

• 13:07Speaker 02

  No, I had like the one oh five or the one oh six. I got this one a couple of years ago. It looked, I mean, it's very similar, but it's the, one of the newer ones.

• 13:14Speaker 00

  Look, I'm not even gonna correct it because I think it's funny if you call it, it's gonna piss a lot of audio heads off if you keep calling it a Newman. So please do.

• 13:21Speaker 02

  Oh, I'm sorry. It's a new man.

• 13:25Speaker 00

  That's good. Keep calling it that, man.

• 13:27Speaker 02

  What's it supposed to be?

• 13:28Speaker 00

  I'm not, it's Neumann, but whatever. It don't matter.

• 13:32Speaker 02

  It's N E U. How is that Neu?

• 13:35Speaker 00

  It's like German or something. I don't know.

• 13:37Speaker 02

  That's why it says Berlin. I just thought it was my microphone's last name this whole time.

• 13:41Speaker 01

  Newman Berlin, my microphone.

• 13:44Speaker 02

  Uh, it's Neumann.

• 13:46Speaker 00

  My new mic is gonna be a warm audio. Why? Thousand.

• 13:50Speaker 02

  Is that how audio heads say that one?

• 13:52Speaker 00

  Yep, I'm pretty sure.

• 13:53Speaker 02

  Neumann. Was that the bad guy? Not the bad guy. D- Dennis Nedry. What's the actor's name?

• 13:58Speaker 01

  That was the bad guy on Seinfeld. Yeah.

• 14:00Speaker 00

  Neumann.

• 14:01Speaker 02

  Seinfeld heads are gonna get really mad if we say it.

• 14:04Speaker 01

  Sorry, Steinfeld.

• 14:06Speaker 02

  That's it.

• 14:07Speaker 01

  Wade, did you do small talk?

• 14:08Speaker 02

  Probably, yeah, about going outside and so on. It was, it was very, it was as good as my jokes, man. It was funny.

• 14:14Speaker 01

  It was really, that was really good small talk. What if I point this at you? That was really good small talk.

• 14:20Speaker 02

  I'm the pillars on which this fell, this foundation is set. And then you guys are the stars that stand on top of it.

• 14:26Speaker 00

  That's nice. That's really sacrificial of you.

• 14:28Speaker 02

  Just power wash me occasionally, then reseal.

• 14:31Speaker 00

  That's just another step I don't wanna take.

• 14:34Speaker 02

  Explains the cracks in the bald.

• 14:38Speaker 01

  This episode is brought to you by T-Mobile 5G Home Internet. You already know that T-Mobile 5G Home Internet is ridiculously easy to set up with a price that doesn't feel like you're getting scammed every month. But here's something new worth noting. T-Mobile now has the fastest 5G home internet according to the experts at Ookla Speed Test.

• 14:57Speaker 00

  No, seriously. Their 5G home internet speeds are officially the fastest, which means that when you're downloading all your movies that aren't mine, every single one except for mine, you'll get them at the fastest speeds possible, along with all your video calls and uploading files and maybe even streaming something in the background, you know?

• 15:16Speaker 02

  And yeah, it is still a great value. Backed by a five-year price guarantee, so your bill doesn't slowly creep up when you're not paying attention. So if you want the fastest 5G home internet with a simple setup and savings that actually stick, head over to t-mobile.com/homeinternet to check availability today. Price guarantee exclusions like taxes and fees apply. Fastest based on Ookla Speed Test Intelligence data, second half 2025. All rights reserved.

• 15:40Speaker 01

  Uh, anyway, you guys want to talk about today's topic?

• 15:44Speaker 02

  Ugh.

• 15:45Speaker 01

  I think we've really been setting weight up for this one. I want to talk about what happens when you get in a bad mood. You're allowed to not be in a bad mood, Wade, but we would really pile in it on. So I pretty well understand if you were in a bad mood. But I, this is stolen from an episode of Bluey where Bingo is in a bad mood and it's pretty funny. There's some shenanigans. Uh, but also recently I've been really bitchy and I have really bad tendencies when I'm in a bad mood. Not in like a, oh, I take it out on everyone else sort of way, just in like a, I'm real insufferable. I don't know how much you guys have experienced me being in a really bad mood around you. Cause usually if we're, if we're hanging out or doing something, we're usually having fun.

• 16:29Speaker 01

  Cause that's kind of what we do, but I, I'm miserable when I'm in a bad mood. I like, cause like Manny, if I'm grumpy, Manny's like, I want to cheer you up. Let me do something nice for you. I'll get you your favorite food. Only makes it worse. I don't know why. I literally, if someone does, if I'm in a bad mood and someone does something nice for me, I'm like, fuck off. I don't deserve nice stuff right now. I hate that you did that. It's like, man, that's really rude. That's really not a good way to behave, but I, it's how I am. I'm awful when I'm in a bad mood. I guess that is kind of taking it out on other people, but I literally, I would just go lock myself in a, I would, I would go away and lock myself in a room and be like, everyone stay away.

• 17:10Speaker 01

  I'm in a bad mood, but then people intrude on that because I don't live in a vacuum. I live with family and stuff, but like, anyway, I've been, I've been having, been having some bad moods lately. I felt kind of bad about that and I was curious, maybe you guys could teach me how to deal with my bad moods better. Or if you have any funny stories, or if you have a similar or your own unique version of what, how you behave when you're in a bad mood. I just want to talk about it. I'm, I'm working some stuff out here, guys. Help me. Therapies me.

• 17:39Speaker 02

  Therapies you? Therapies him in the face?

• 17:42Speaker 01

  Hit me with the therapies.

• 17:43Speaker 02

  I'm going to hit you with the theronin.

• 17:47Speaker 02

  I don't know what that is, but it sounds entertaining.

• 17:52Speaker 02

  Is that next to Neon on the periodic table, Theronon?

• 17:55Speaker 00

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's it. Yeah. Yeah, theremin is the little electromagnetic device. Ther- Theran- Ther- Theranone was the company that that person was made the lady on the Forbes.

• 18:07Speaker 02

  It's German, Theranoin.

• 18:09Speaker 00

  Theranoin, probably. She went to jail.

• 18:11Speaker 01

  Yo, the lady who just straight up lied, Theranos.

• 18:14Speaker 02

  Allegedly.

• 18:15Speaker 01

  No, it's pretty much conclusively proven.

• 18:19Speaker 01

  We're not making those claims. You can look it up. She did not succeed in her defense in court. But yeah, no, that was, man, if that machine did exist, it would really do a lot of good stuff.

• 18:29Speaker 03

  I actually know what you guys are referencing for what?

• 18:31Speaker 02

  What happened to my voice there?

• 18:32Speaker 00

  What was that?

• 18:34Speaker 02

  Who? I don't know. I just got excited. I don't know what happened.

• 18:37Speaker 03

  Well, I actually know what you guys are referencing for once.

• 18:40Speaker 00

  His true voice came out, man.

• 18:44Speaker 03

  Oh, man, I can't believe it.

• 18:46Speaker 00

  That was not the, that was not the voice that came through. I'm, I'm, I'm very scared right now. I'm very scared.

• 18:52Speaker 02

  I'm fine. I'm perfectly fine.

• 18:54Speaker 00

  Just like Bob's magic trick that scared me legitimately. I actually, I'm not gonna lie. When Bob, when you disappeared in that closet, I actually went, where'd you go? I, I'm not joking. I fully had a second there.

• 19:06Speaker 01

  I know. I have that effect on people. I'm quite the magician.

• 19:10Speaker 02

  We here distractible incorporated our toddlers.

• 19:14Speaker 00

  What was the question? I don't even remember what we're doing here. What are we doing?

• 19:16Speaker 01

  Wade knew about Theranos after we talked about it for a solid 90 seconds. He was finally like, I know what you guys are talking about for what?

• 19:25Speaker 02

  I didn't know the name, but I knew the subject matter. So once, once it was explained, it's like, oh, I have heard that story about the lady who was, yeah, selling the whatever Theranos. I, I just, I felt like one of the part of the group for once, you know, I was on the end. I, I knew.

• 19:40Speaker 00

  You're literally already.

• 19:42Speaker 01

  Imagine how we must feel knowing so many more things, so much more of the time. It's like a constant high, man.

• 19:50Speaker 02

  I don't live that life, but I was here once. I peaked. I was itchrous. I flew too close to the no. Now I'm falling back down. I got bad mood stuff, I suppose. Mark, you have bad mood stuff?

• 20:00Speaker 00

  Yeah, I've been in bad moods every once in a while.

• 20:02Speaker 01

  What do you do? How does it go? Do you take it out on everyone around you? Like, I apparently didn't realize until now that I do.

• 20:08Speaker 00

  You only took until now to realize it?

• 20:10Speaker 01

  I always thought I didn't, but the thing was, I used, when I used to be in a bad mood, I used to also be single and alone. And so I couldn't take it out on anyone anyway, so it didn't matter. Uh, but now I realize I actually am pretty mean sometimes when I'm in a bad mood, but not in like a, I seek you out, take it out on you sort of way. But in like a, if you come too close to me, I'll be a real bitch about it. And that's also kind of, it's pretty unfair. Not very nice.

• 20:33Speaker 02

  For some reason, just imagine single you going to like a bar and like ask like, hey, you want to go out? Yeah. And then you're like, well, I don't. And then walking back out again because you're in a bad mood.

• 20:42Speaker 01

  Yeah, I did that a lot. Uh, you got me.

• 20:45Speaker 00

  Yeah, I remember we were all out eating dinner and he would just like shoot himself down after he gets the yes, which is the craziest moment to do it. No one wants to go out with me. I said yes. Well, you lied. Actually, unironically, some incels.

• 20:59Speaker 02

  You're probably right. You're probably right.

• 21:02Speaker 01

  Oh, man. Thank God I found Maddy. I would absolutely be that person. Uh, who gets to go first? I'm gonna flip this pen and if I catch the tip, that's Mark, and if I catch the clip, that's Wade.

• 21:14Speaker 00

  That's a really good way to do it.

• 21:17Speaker 01

  I caught the clip. Wade, you go first. Bad mood me.

• 21:20Speaker 02

  All right. Uh, so I am just, I remember being in a really bad mood at my computer and I have this like wrist rest, right? That I rest my wrist on. That's the whole point, wrist rest. And, uh, I don't remember what I was in such a bad mood about, whether it was family or something, but I was just genuinely pissed off. Not even just like, I was actually like pissed off and I just like threw a baby tantrum where I like slammed my fists around. And I hit my desk and knocked the wrist rest off, which was slightly askew to the left. Well, I had food on my desk and The wrist rest, of course, had to hit the thing of like hit my drink into my food, which then knocked all of that off on me. So then I threw the tantrum and covered myself and like, I don't remember pizza or whatever the hell it was.

• 22:03Speaker 02

  And then I was in like an even worse mood, kind of, but also it kind of reality checked me where I was like, huh? Me acting like baby makes mess like baby. Now I've got to clean up this mess that I made because I was being a big bitch for no reason. I deserve this.

• 22:20Speaker 01

  This doesn't have to be a theme of the episode. You are allowed to be in a bad mood and I feel like like slamming your desk and making a mess is kind of like from our perspective in the now that you're not in a bad mood seems silly. I feel like of all the things a person could do, that's not, that's pretty good. Like if you go punch a pillow or you go, you know, you go screaming to a pillow or you slamming it, as long as you're not hurting yourself or like breaking, breaking your own stuff. So it's like you just kind of made a mess. That's not that bad. It may feel silly that you did that. You're like, oh, I gotta clean this up now. But you didn't like scream at someone or to like, dude, like, you know, you, that's, that's fine. That seems okay. Sometimes you're in a bad mood.

• 22:58Speaker 02

  I just yelled like fuck and slammed my fucking fist down and then made a huge mess and then felt like I'm still in a bad mood, but it's like, I was no longer in a ragey, self-destructive mood. It was just like a, well, now I'm an asshole. I see that I have an asshole. I have a mess to clean up and I'm still in a bad mood. What did that accomplish? Didn't help my mood, but it like, I guess it did help my mood, but it didn't help my mood.

• 23:19Speaker 01

  Kind of sounds like it helped a little. I can't really imagine you doing that in, in with sincerity. I could imagine you being like for the bit, just be like, ah, doing something crazy and making a big mess.

• 23:29Speaker 02

  I don't get actually mad very often. Like I get upset or like annoyed. Actually mad is very rare for me. That was an actually mad moment.

• 23:37Speaker 01

  That sounds like a decently healthy way to try and to work it out. Sounds sarcastic, but I'm really trying to be sincere.

• 23:44Speaker 02

  It sounded a little sarcastic. I'm not gonna lie.

• 23:46Speaker 01

  I, look, I have the same problem with James. James, the first time he went poop on the potty, he was like, I did it. And I was like, you did. Wow. You would poop on the potty. I was like, no, wait. How do I be sincere? I'm really proud of you. I love you. I love you. So what?

• 24:02Speaker 02

  Good job.

• 24:04Speaker 01

  Yeah, no, I do that real bad. Uh, but that sounds pretty.

• 24:07Speaker 02

  Good. Oh, okay. If you went higher pitched, now I believe you.

• 24:10Speaker 00

  I've been known to be in bad moods on occasion. I'm always fascinated by the fact that something flips in your head and it feels good to do shitty things when you're in a bad mood. I don't know why, but you know, it's like you just, you have these words that you want to say usually, and you're like, ah, it'd be a shitty thing to say. I don't want to say that. I'll feel bad. But when you're in a bad mood, it's like, I am gonna, I'm gonna say all, it sounds like I'm trying to say a slur or something.

• 24:40Speaker 00

  Meanwhile, he's actually like, you're a poo poo head. I've, I've been in numerous bad moods. I'd say the most recent streaks were even sometimes on this podcast where I would come on and we'd cut it out, but I just, I'd just get so frustrated from all the stress and the pressure. And it would bubble out and I'd, I'd blow up for one reason or another. Um, and I would just have to go, and it's always like, ah, blow up. And then it's like, I go out and I talk to Amy and then I feel better. That's like been the only thing that's made me feel better is like, I go over to Amy, I'm like,

• 25:14Speaker 00

  and Amy's like, you're being a dick. And I'm like, I'm being a dick. Um, instantly it's,

• 25:22Speaker 02

  She just has the needle for your balloon.

• 25:25Speaker 00

  It's not like, you know, we've had fights on occasion and you, we've been mad at each other, but for the most part, if she says something like that, it's just like,

• 25:32Speaker 00

  and I'll come back and even if I, I, I blow up, you guys will come back and go, yeah, I'm sorry. Right. Most of, sometimes I come back and say, I'm sorry. Sometimes I come back and like, I'm still mad. Cause Amy wasn't there or something, but yeah, no.

• 25:45Speaker 02

  We're gonna get an Amy cardboard cutouts for our office. Just to go like, all right, we gotta pacify Mark.

• 25:54Speaker 00

  It's like they, on Unisoc, that's what I made. SCP Amy, you know, the, the,

• 26:00Speaker 00

  the light stand with a lab jacket.

• 26:03Speaker 01

  With that fucking walkie talkie that just made the crazy ass noises.

• 26:08Speaker 00

  That was such a fun one. I love that walkie talkie. That was so good. Anyway, so yeah, I, in the most reason, that's the most reason bad moods. I've got plenty more, but yeah. Bob, have you ever blown up with us?

• 26:19Speaker 01

  I'm, I'm a, I'm a, I'm a shiver downer. I've definitely, I've definitely been in sessions where I was in a bad mood. I, I think I could say it's never been related to you guys or because of you guys, but I've come in in a bad mood because of other stuff. But I'll hold the whole time. I'm just like, let's keep going. But I think, I think if you, if someone who knows me watched carefully, they could tell because the whole time my comedy is a little bit more assaulting and a little, a little bit more like, like it comes, it's not like I'm here having a good time. It's like, I'm here to take it out through jokes against people or whatever, like.

• 26:56Speaker 00

  Yeah, we've done stuff enough over the years where I think we've all had moments, I'm sure, but.

• 27:00Speaker 01

  Thinking about this, there really is more like a very self-centered therapy episode, but I like this. This is good. Uh, have you ever had a moment where you had some big realization about like how you were processing your bad mood? Or how you're processing emotions in general? Cause I've, I've always been a very like shove it down inside. And I, and I do process things internally. It's not like I shove it down and never deal with it. But it takes a long time to do that. And there are way more efficient ways to deal with stuff emotionally. Uh, and like productive ways, like if I'm being a dick to Mandy for reasons that are unrelated to her.

• 27:42Speaker 01

  It's both unfair to her, but also she could totally help. Like it's, it's very similar to what you said, Mark. Like I am an asshole, but often if Mandy is like, look, I'm trying to be nice to you, but you're being a piece of shit. I'm immediately like, oh, you're right. Oh, sorry. Like it deflates it very quickly. But like, have you guys ever had any like breakthroughs about, I don't know, about yourself or your personal, you know, journey with that sort of stuff, processing emotions?

• 28:10Speaker 02

  It's a little bit less to do with bad moods, but like I learned how much of a people pleaser I am, which I think relates to like whenever I am in a bad mood like you, I internalize a lot. Like I'm like, well, I'm not going to go share this with everyone else and put it on their shoulders. This is my problem and I've, I've got to be the one to handle it. Like I, I can take it. I can deal with it. I've done with it my whole life, but like even at a young age when my parents split up, I remember being asked like, oh, do you want to go stay with your grandparents or here? Or do you want to go to like your dad's, your mom's? You know, I was always asked where I wanted to go, which was a lot of pressure at like four years old. Cause it's like four year old me was like, everyone seems to like spending time with me. They love having me. So I've got to like make two people sad to make one happy. And I would always try, even if I wanted to go somewhere in particular,

• 28:53Speaker 02

  I would try to be balanced and always pick a different person. So that way everyone got to have the joy of me around. My four year old ego.

• 29:02Speaker 02

  Cause you know, as a four year old, I thought everyone was always so nice, you know, cause I was a kid and I was, I loved. So people were nice to me, but even if they wanted like a break, I never knew that as a kid they wanted to break. So I was like, well, I picked them last week and I gotta pick someone else this weekend and someone else next weekend. Like I tried to make that balance. And so the people pleasing became just an integral part of who I am, which you guys have seen at conventions where we're like, let's go to dinner. And I'm like, hey, can we bring 50 other people? Or whenever I'm like trying to balance out, like doing collabs or playing games with people. It's like, well, I was really having fun playing this game, but I've not played with so and so in like two weeks. So I better do this, this week instead of continuing that thing I actually want to do. And when it comes to like being in a bad mood, it's very similar. It's like everyone who needs to vent, I will be there. Say what you need to say, get it off your chest. Then someone's like, wait, what do you, what do you,

• 29:45Speaker 02

  do you have anything you want to get off your chest? I'm like, no, I'm good. On the inside, I'm like, yes, please let me out. It's like, shut up you. I'll deal with you by playing a video game later. But I mean, I'll talk to Molly and like with Amy, you know, Molly's there to help me and she'll let me know if I'm being an asshole or so on and so forth. And I've gotten better about letting stuff out there, but there's still that people pleasing tendency in me where it's like, no, I've dealt with a lot in life. I can continue to deal with a lot. This is relatively small compared to what I've dealt with in the past, which shouldn't even be that big of a deal. Why am I in a bad mood anyway? And I'll try to like rationalize out the bad mood, which doesn't really work, but I try.

• 30:17Speaker 01

  I try that aggressively. Man, does that not work?

• 30:21Speaker 00

  You know what kind of, you know, kind of asshole I am? I'm a people unpleaser.

• 30:28Speaker 00

  Nothing pisses me off more than a poorly timed text when I'm not even mad or busy. In fact, most of the time when I'm not busy, I'm like, I, I, I'm not even like, oh, I just sat down. If a text catches me at the wrong time, I'm intentionally not responding for a while.

• 30:47Speaker 00

  Actually, it's not, it's not necessarily that, but I just, I don't, I'm like, I'm not gonna.

• 30:51Speaker 02

  No, I agree. Texts are different. I hate getting texts.

• 30:55Speaker 00

  I'm very insular sometimes when I get pissed off and I'm just like, everybody just fuck off. I'm not gonna talk to anybody. I don't want to be bothered. And then instead of doing some productive efforts, I sit and I don't, I don't want to talk to anybody. Fuck everybody, you know, so I, I don't know. It's the most impotent, useless kind of grumpiness possible. I, I did that sometimes when I was like in high school with my, my high school girlfriend. Sometimes I would get mad because I'd be like, but I want to spend time with you. And then it'd be like, finally she'd be like, oh, I want to spend time with you. And I'm just like, well, no, I'm not gonna do it.

• 31:32Speaker 00

  It's just the stupidest thing. It's like the most asinine, opposite day, kind of unhelpful bullshit. And so, uh, yeah, I've tried to push that out as much as I can, but when things get really busy, I do get caught up in it. I'm just like, oh, I want to do anything. I want to go drive in a circle. Where's 275? Let me drive around it.

• 31:51Speaker 02

  I have that in a weird way too. Like if someone messages me about playing something, I'll be like annoyed and grumpy the entire time leading up to it. And then I'll play or do whatever it is. I'll legitimately have a good time and it's like, man, why was I so not looking forward to this? This was fun. And then the next week I'll go through the same fucking cycle of, oh, like Ryan wants to play a game on Friday. I'm like, oh, Ryan wants to play a fucking game on Friday. I guess I'll put him on my schedule to stream with him on Friday. Oh, fucking asshole poking me. And then we'll play off like one of the best times I've had all week. I'm like, oh, what a good time. And then I'll hear like the next week like, hey, you want it? Oh, fucking you want to do something, you son of a bitch?

• 32:25Speaker 00

  Again, God, we had such a good time last time. You whatever. I don't know what it is about me where I'm like that. People want to play games. I'm like, I don't want to fucking play that game. I want to do, go do this. And it all plays like, oh, that was so fun. I wish we could have kept going. Hey, we'll play it next week. Oh, do I want to play? Fuck you. Do I want to play next week? I got shit to do. It's the same thing with a shower, you know, sometimes where it's just like, I know it feels good. This one I'm in there, I'm like, oh, dude, so nice. It's like, I gotta take my clothes off and I gotta, oh, I gotta step in there. Ew. I don't have 10 minutes to shower.

• 32:56Speaker 01

  Having, having a kid has been such a bad excuse for me. Cause there's like in, in everyday life, if you're just on your own, like ignore everything else. There's always a thing where you're like, well, I could shower now, but like I was going to work out later. Or like, there's always something, right? That, that was just like, ah, it's not a great, like you could always think of something with James. It's always like, well, I haven't showered in a couple of days, but James is probably going to wake up from his nap and I'm going to have to change a poop or I don't know, who knows? Like your babies do all kinds of stuff. I'm going to have to roll around on the floor. Why would I ever shower? I'm just going to pig pen it up. He doesn't care. I don't care.

• 33:37Speaker 01

  I'll just wear these same sweats for, it's such a, I don't know that that's universal, but I feel like it's so hard with him added on to my regular baseline level of laziness and sloven, slovenliness, sloth, slothy, sloviness?

• 33:53Speaker 00

  Slovenliness.

• 33:54Speaker 01

  Sloven, whatever. It, it's like, it's so easy to just look at anything and be like, I could drink some water. There's a glass of water in my hand that I got to drink, but I'm just going to be dehydrated in like another couple of hours. Why would I even, like, what? Is this a losing battle?

• 34:13Speaker 00

  God, you're so right. I've had this water, I have this water bottle next to me. I'm just like, I don't want to drink that ice cold water. Ew, I'm going to grab this ginger beer instead. Ew, I'm drinking it. I'll drink it. Fine. I'll fucking drink it, you fucking son of a bitch.

• 34:30Speaker 01

  I was not trying to fear pressure you. I do the exact same shit. It's, I don't have water. Diet Mountain Dew water. Can I drink my Diet Mountain Dew and feel good about my life?

• 34:39Speaker 02

  It's used to make it probably.

• 34:41Speaker 00

  Yeah, something in there is water.

• 34:43Speaker 02

  This is unrelated, but related. It reminded me of a time where I was, I was at some kind of convenience store. I used to work at a convenience store to set this up. And of course, when people would come in, you have like the ding. So you knew that a customer was arriving. I remember being in a store and I was in a bad mood. I think I was arguing with somebody. I don't remember if it was family or friend or whatever, but I was having like an argument. I was kind of in a bad mood. And I remember what ended up breaking it was somebody walked into the store and it had a very similar ding to the place I worked. And like in the middle of being like, yeah, I don't care if you fucking ding.

• 35:14Speaker 01

  Hi, how are you?

• 35:15Speaker 02

  Like just out of habit of working at the store, I turned to greet some random person while I was in the middle of this argument. And it completely shifted everything away. It made it really funny, but uh.

• 35:25Speaker 01

  You need to get that, you need to get that sound saved on your phone or something. So you just be like, God, it's such a bad fucking thing.

• 35:32Speaker 02

  That was a really hard thing to break was if you ever heard a similar ding, or if I went into like U D Fs around Cincinnati. If someone walked in, it was like, do not greet people, Wade. You're not wearing an apron. You don't look like you belong. You look like a fucking weirdo. If you're just like, hi, how are you? Like if someone's walking in to buy their coffee.

• 35:48Speaker 01

  I, this is a very, uh, I am him energy of me, but I, I used to work at Jimmy John's and we used to, it was the one on campus and it was open super late. And I must be the only human in existence who we would, you know, we closed at like three, if I remember right, which is really fucking late. But we would get a big rush because the bars would kick everyone out at two and then we'd get a bunch of people in. And then right up till close, it's like, it's three o'clock. We close the door and we're like, go the fuck home or go somewhere else drunks, whatever. And, uh, everyone and including, I'm still surprised. I mean, I know it happens, but I'm still confused why people are so mad. When you go to a store and it's like, oh, we close in an hour and you walk in and you're like, yeah, I'd like a burrito or whatever. And they're like,

• 36:33Speaker 01

  Rito, this guy, does he know we close in an hour? It's like, yeah, I know you close in an hour. Doesn't that mean you're open? As a, as a customer, I know that that's like a dick. Well, again, like. Here at work, I understand that sucks. Sometimes it's worse than other times, but when I was working, if someone walked into my Jimmy John's at 2:55 in the morning, all my coworkers would be like, this fucking guy, god damn. I'd be like, just make him a fucking sandwich. Like, it takes us five minutes. By the time we're done making this drunk's sandwich, we can close the doors and it's no different than if they didn't come in, but we didn't have to stand there doing nothing staring at the clock for five minutes.

• 37:18Speaker 01

  But like, I feel like it's very natural to get mad. Get that you're like, I just wanna go home. Just go away. What, but if you're open, especially, I think one, one time I went into a place, it was like, it was really late dinner. It was like 7:30 at night and I was like, I need something. I went in and the place closed at like nine. So they weren't like about to close. They had like a solid hour and a half still. And I walked in and I got that same shit where I walked in and they were like, oh, hey, sir, what, uh, sorry, we're kind of, the lines kind of closed down. What can we get for you? I'm like, you guys are not even remotely closed. Like you're, you are jumping the gun on this one. I get that you don't like your job or it's been a rough day, but like, please make me a sandwich. I'm really, I'll pay you. I'll pay you full price. Just give me the sandwich.

• 38:04Speaker 01

  I'm sure, I'm sure, I don't know. I mean, do you guys feel that? Do you ever work till close somewhere? It was like.

• 38:09Speaker 00

  I want to say something that's gonna sound extremely derogatory. All right. So with the sandwich shop, I imagine it's different with like a sit down restaurant. Cause like sometimes people do come in late, but with the sandwich shop, I think it's that case of where the monkeys and the ladder and the banana and the water, you know this?

• 38:26Speaker 02

  I don't know what the hell you're talking about.

• 38:28Speaker 01

  Is that something I'm supposed to know?

• 38:29Speaker 00

  Okay. So there's a science experiment, right? There's a cage full of monkeys or something. And monk, not or something. It was monkeys for sure. It was absolutely.

• 38:36Speaker 02

  All right, all right. Locked in monkeys.

• 38:39Speaker 01

  Okay, monkeys or children, something.

• 38:41Speaker 00

  There's, there's 10 or so monkeys in there, right? And they put a ladder and there's banana on a rope up top. And then see, oh, one of the monkeys like, hey, climbs the ladder. As soon as he climbs the ladder, they spray cold water into the cage, right? They take one monkey out, they put a new monkey in who has not been sprayed. He's like, banana, goes up there, get spray, everyone gets sprayed and then they beat the shit out of the new monkey.

• 39:05Speaker 02

  Damn.

• 39:07Speaker 00

  So it got to the point where they were replaced with a monkey and eventually it's like the monkey, even if it touched the ladder and they didn't spray it, they would still beat the shit out of the new monkey. Right. They'd be like, don't touch the ladder and got to the point where they started replacing so many that there was no monkey that had ever been sprayed with water, but they would still beat the shit out of the monkeys because they were like, this is just what we do. This is what we do. We don't touch the ladder. We cannot touch the ladder. The ladder will be beat up and, and it's like, I think what that is with the people come in is people that work at restaurants where they, people sit down, but they get to a new food restaurant and they can't be like, oh, I gotta be mad for something. We're gonna beat their shit out of a customer for coming in before close, even if it takes five minutes to make the food. I think, I think that might be that.

• 39:52Speaker 02

  It's such a horrible experiment. Like I know I'm laughing and smiling, but also that's like, that's terrible.

• 39:57Speaker 01

  That is interesting. I had never heard that before.

• 39:59Speaker 00

  I think it's real. I'm pretty sure it's real, but you know, who knows?

• 40:03Speaker 01

  I, I have to say too, you and I both worked at the same restaurant. Sorry. And I do, it is different at a sit down place when you, it's like, okay, we close in 15 minutes and then someone comes in and is like table for three. It's like, well, you're not going to eat and leave in 15 minutes, are you? But I did always think the social, like some people are oblivious and then so maybe it doesn't work so well, but the social pressure of being that last table in a restaurant while like five servers and the bartender and the, and the chefs in the back are like in the, everyone in the whole place is, is waiting to leave and you're sitting there just like, sushi. That's gotta be so fucking awkward, right? Like that they are, they are suffering enough, but maybe people just don't give a shit. I don't know.

• 40:45Speaker 00

  They're having a magical moment. It's the greatest date I've ever been on.

• 40:48Speaker 02

  Didn't we do that at a Fogo or something once? The Brazilian steakhouse where we were the last table? They still had to bring us the meat?

• 40:53Speaker 01

  Oh, we would never, we would never do that. What? No. What?

• 40:57Speaker 02

  We were the only table. There's like four guys just hovering around us with meat on like, you want more?

• 41:02Speaker 00

  No, other people did this, not us. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 41:06Speaker 01

  We wouldn't do that. That doesn't sound true. I don't think that happened.

• 41:10Speaker 00

  Were you spreading lies about us? Puts me in a bad mood, man.

• 41:14Speaker 01

  Better look out. He's not going to want to hang out with us.

• 41:16Speaker 02

  There is nothing like finishing, cleaning up your ice cream area and then having a customer is like, I want a giant chocolate mousse. Extra thick like two minutes before it closed and it's like, but that sprays everywhere. It'll cover everything we've just cleaned and milkshake again.

• 41:33Speaker 00

  This you go into the guy, but sir, it sprays everywhere. We don't have the technology to block that.

• 41:41Speaker 02

  I mean, that happened a lot. People would come in last minute for ice cream. It was always like, oh, fine. We'll make it. We're open and we can serve it here. You enjoy your Sunday. Glad you want that midnight banana split. There was, we, we actually had closed and we'd locked the door. Uh, we'd turned like the lights off. We were counting like the registers or whatever we did before closed, like before we actually got to leave. And someone came like, I think I haven't even told this story in here before. Someone came frantically up to our door and was like pounding on the door and it's a glass door. So we see them and we're like, okay, something's wrong. So we opened the door like, uh, we're closed. Can we, can we help you? It's a police. I desperately just, I really need a milkshake. Sir, we are, we are closed. What, what do you mean you desperate? An emergency milkshake? I've never heard of this.

• 42:23Speaker 02

  It's like, I am really fucking high and it just sounds so good. I need it so bad. I was in a bit of a conundrum because I was like, well, there is another one UDF open like 24 seven, like three miles from here. But I also don't want to tell this guy who was high out of his fucking mind to go driving three miles to another location. So what do I do here? I don't remember if I told them there was another location or not, but it's like, I don't really feel like it's morally correct for me to send you driving off somewhere in your current state. But also I'm not making you a fucking milkshake. We're closed. Everything's shut down. Couldn't if I wanted to. Well, I could make you a milkshake. Die. Go die.

• 43:00Speaker 02

  I can't get arrested. We're closed. We can kill now. Dealing with people late at night. The rest of the day was fine. That last like 20 minute window of just staring angrily at the front door, daring anybody to come in. It was your monkey ladder boat squirt.

• 43:15Speaker 00

  Did it work when you glared at the mangrily? Did anyone ever turn around?

• 43:19Speaker 02

  No, that because we, I think we like, we knew we couldn't actually glare. So it was like a.

• 43:24Speaker 00

  We should create a scenario as like a therapy session where it's like, you're working at the desk and I'll walk in and you make me leave. Right? Okay. All right. Okay. You get the apron. You got your little choo choo hat, right? You had a hat, right? For UDF.

• 43:38Speaker 01

  Yeah, they, they wore hats. I'm pretty sure they had hats.

• 43:40Speaker 02

  I don't think we had hats.

• 43:42Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 43:43Speaker 00

  Poofy shoulders, like, like gloves, like dainty gloves, right?

• 43:47Speaker 02

  No, don't think we use gloves.

• 43:48Speaker 00

  Anyway.

• 43:50Speaker 00

  Are you open?

• 43:51Speaker 02

  No.

• 43:52Speaker 00

  Open. All right, can I get a milkshake?

• 43:55Speaker 02

  How are you in here? The door was locked.

• 43:57Speaker 00

  Oh, I'm fine. Thank you for asking. I would like a chocolate malt, please.

• 44:02Speaker 02

  A lot of malt powder and milk.

• 44:04Speaker 00

  I see milk duds. You could crunch them up.

• 44:06Speaker 02

  Cash register is broken.

• 44:08Speaker 00

  I'm gonna hang out here.

• 44:09Speaker 02

  The police are on their way.

• 44:11Speaker 00

  Well, thank God.

• 44:15Speaker 02

  All right, I guess you can hang.

• 44:17Speaker 00

  Ah, see, come on, man.

• 44:18Speaker 01

  No, you failed.

• 44:20Speaker 00

  No, damn it. You'll never grow as a human.

• 44:23Speaker 02

  You were so cool. How can I say no? That charisma, man, it beats me every time.

• 44:27Speaker 00

  That's right. Look, hey, but you're funny. Don't forget that.

• 44:31Speaker 01

  Hey, very funny.

• 44:35Speaker 01

  All right, well, I'm gonna say this therapy session is concluded.

• 44:39Speaker 02

  Can I share a story I found before you finally wrap it up? I don't care if it's for points. I just found it really funny.

• 44:44Speaker 01

  If it's actually funny, I'll point at you and tell you.

• 44:47Speaker 02

  There's a story I was, I was like, I don't know if I have this many stories. I was looking at other people's stories, what happened when they were angry. And there was a person who I couldn't tell if they were like a CEO or worked in HR, but they worked in like customer, whatever, employee, something. Employees would come knocking on the door and come into their office, basically, quite often. They were having a really bad day. After dealing with someone particularly annoying, they like, whatever. They went to take a bathroom break and they went to like a bathroom stall, closed and locked the door and were like sitting there doing their business. And someone came and like knocked on the door while they were in there. And they were just already annoyed and pissed, but they forgot that they weren't in their office and they yelled, "Come in angrily" instead of occupied.

• 45:27Speaker 02

  And apparently that changed the trajectory of their day because it was just really fucking funny. Of come in and the person outside is like, ah, never mind.

• 45:37Speaker 02

  And I found that story very funny, so I had to share that.

• 45:40Speaker 00

  You're just holding the door handle. You're like, my life is at a crossroads right now. I have a choice here.

• 45:46Speaker 02

  I see two paths.

• 45:50Speaker 02

  Anyway, that was a short and sweet, but I found it really funny.

• 45:53Speaker 01

  Uh, unfortunately, I actually laughed and I didn't point at you and say it was funny. So I guess.

• 45:58Speaker 02

  Cause it wasn't my story.

• 45:59Speaker 00

  That there was wasn't there a story about how like, I forget which senator or something. It was like, it was like a bathroom stall. It was like tapping your foot or something. Remember it being a sign like, I want to solicit sex from you. Other person in the next stall. There was someone like that.

• 46:16Speaker 01

  I don't remember who, but it was, it was like a senator or congressperson or something. Yeah, that was in the news.

• 46:23Speaker 00

  So from then on, has anyone else, has happened to anyone else where I became irrationally afraid of tapping my toe in a, in a bathroom stall? Lest it be misread as a solicitation or something because I'm like, I'm not a stall toe tapper by any means. But I've been known to bounce my knee a couple of times when I'm pooping. So I'm like, anyone else get weirdly afraid of that?

• 46:46Speaker 01

  I am not an over thinker. Generally, I'm, I'm pretty laid back. But public bathroom stalls, if I'm in a stall, like if I had to sit down to do business and I'm in, I sit in there and I'm like, I need to make sure I'm ready in case someone opens the door. I don't, when I go to the bathroom at home, I'm like a toddler. I like take, I strip naked and just what, but when I'm in per, I like sit on the thing and I'm like, oh, I have my pants positioned and I'll make sure that I look presentable and I'm not tapping. I don't want to make any extra noises. I don't want anyone around me to know what's going on here. It's very polite and professional. I literally met possibly the only place in the whole world where I'm like, I better make sure I don't do anything unthought, you know, thoughtless or do anything extra.

• 47:30Speaker 01

  If someone came in here, they'd be like, oh, excuse me. And I'd be like, yes, good day. Like, I don't know what it is about, but yes, no, I that, I didn't need that news story in my life to make me way overthink what I'm doing in the bathroom stall. And I, I've come up with contingencies too. If I sit down and I forgot to check before I decided if there is toilet paper. I'm like, I'm frantically like, all right, which side do I ask? How do I ask for toilet paper from my neighbor? What if our fingers touch while he's handing it to me? What does that mean? Do I need to do something? It goes, I go down hole, rabbit holes. It's, it's stressful situations, but I would never tap my toes.

• 48:09Speaker 02

  I do everything in my power to avoid using public restrooms. I plan my trips around. All right, well, if I eat this food, usually I've got like 30 minutes or I've got three hours before I need to. So we can go to the store after that, but then straight home. Ever since we were at a convention years ago, uh, we, I, we had like someone that was escorting us around. There was a lot of fans around and so someone escorted me to a restroom at one point. And I thought their whole point was they were going to not let anyone else in the restroom. So I went to like standard a urinal and then right as I was in the middle of pissing, a fan comes running in, camera out. Dude, can I get a selfie? And I'm like dick in hand mid piss like, can it wait a minute? Like, and I was like, I don't know if I'm on video right now.

• 48:54Speaker 02

  I don't know what the fuck's happening, but like, I don't know. Ever since that experience of just like, there's nothing I can do. I, I'm standing here and there's, I, I guess I'm either on camera or I'm not, I don't know.

• 49:06Speaker 00

  Why are you pissing so far away from the urinal? You could just kind of like, hey, don't.

• 49:11Speaker 02

  I don't even know that I was, but there was just something in my brain where I was like, this is how my dick gets revealed.

• 49:17Speaker 01

  Are you standing at the other opposite wall going for the distance record? Is that what you're doing like?

• 49:21Speaker 02

  No, not now. It's like the carnival game. I was trying to hit the target.

• 49:25Speaker 01

  Try to pop the water balloon, see how much you can get in there.

• 49:28Speaker 02

  I was like, I'm a piss sniper.

• 49:31Speaker 00

  Well, I mean, that's how they knew you were in there. You were just shouting out the bathroom.

• 49:35Speaker 02

  Hey, I know the piss sniper.

• 49:39Speaker 02

  What's that? Uh, what's the sniper's name? The, the dude, the snow guy, the white something.

• 49:44Speaker 00

  The snow guy.

• 49:46Speaker 02

  White death. I think it was white death.

• 49:47Speaker 00

  White death?

• 49:49Speaker 02

  Yeah, there's a sniper called white death. I was trying to think of a pun where I was yellow something.

• 49:53Speaker 00

  Yellow death?

• 49:54Speaker 02

  Yellow death. I'm yellow death. I've hit 16 targets with one bladder. Better than brown death, the poop sniper. Point at me, say that was funny.

• 50:05Speaker 01

  That was funny.

• 50:06Speaker 02

  Damn it, why didn't I go brown?

• 50:08Speaker 01

  That was a good, that was a good extra story. I appreciate that. And none of us tap our toes at the bathroom. Noted.

• 50:14Speaker 02

  God, no.

• 50:15Speaker 01

  If I remember next to someone who claims to be one of you two, but their toe was tapping, I'll know it's a trap. Uh, I would say that's the end of the episode. Mark, you earned points for, man, I really like Wade again today. Uh, perfectest crime lie point, climate change, very funny, illegal interview tactics. Where'd he go? Not saying those slurs you have to try so hard not to say when you're in a bad mood. Talking to Amy, people unpleaser, monkeys slash children in cages, and hmm, die.

• 50:51Speaker 01

  Wade, you earned points for outside walk, penny, you bitch.

• 50:57Speaker 02

  What?

• 50:58Speaker 01

  Now here's your severance. There you go. Neil, amen. And I actually know what you guys are talking about. Oh, there you go. Yeah.

• 51:10Speaker 02

  In the weird voice, yeah, yeah.

• 51:12Speaker 01

  Bitch baby mess, the, the ding that makes you activate.

• 51:17Speaker 02

  Hi, how are you?

• 51:18Speaker 01

  But that sprays everywhere and I'm a piss sniper. Making the actual score, I will say it till your last little addition Wade. Mark was up. It was nine for Mark and eight for Wade. One of Mark's is a lie point.

• 51:32Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm.

• 51:32Speaker 01

  Wade, Wade scored some piss sniper points. It's now nine to nine and Mark has one lie point.

• 51:38Speaker 02

  Can't believe my poop sniper joke didn't get a point.

• 51:41Speaker 01

  This is traditionally where we spin the wheel.

• 51:45Speaker 02

  And?

• 51:49Speaker 01

  The thing about that is I have to move my computer in order to do this next part. Oh, man, I can't believe a gun on a mount isn't a good, stable platform to put my computer on.

• 51:59Speaker 02

  You gotta work on your halo reach. That's funny.

• 52:03Speaker 01

  Oh, the coin flip. I'm gonna flip my pen. You guys all have a coin? Do we each wanna flip a thing?

• 52:09Speaker 02

  They'll got it.

• 52:10Speaker 01

  Alright.

• 52:11Speaker 02

  Heads is spin, tails is no spin.

• 52:15Speaker 01

  Jesus Christ.

• 52:17Speaker 00

  Tails.

• 52:18Speaker 01

  I got spit.

• 52:19Speaker 00

  Man, I flipped that right into my microphone. Sorry about that.

• 52:23Speaker 01

  Alright, here we go. Gamer skills, activate.

• 52:28Speaker 00

  I forgot that this was a stupid system.

• 52:33Speaker 01

  This is a very legitimate thing.

• 52:40Speaker 00

  Sudden death.

• 52:41Speaker 01

  Oh no!

• 52:43Speaker 00

  You know what? It's not so stupid. It's system neutral. I don't think it's that stupid. I'm pretty sure it's not stupid.

• 52:50Speaker 01

  But we don't have the sudden death wheel.

• 52:53Speaker 00

  Oh fuck. Oh god damn it. Well, it's got plus 10% on it. I don't know if you knew that.

• 52:58Speaker 01

  Plus 10%? I don't even know. I think it was at 6% plus 10%.

• 53:05Speaker 00

  I mean, you could rebuild the wheel. You could do that from a, uh, I think it got, I don't think it's been spun since the last time.

• 53:11Speaker 01

  I think it got freshly reset and I think we started at 6%.

• 53:15Speaker 02

  I think that's correct. So I think it's just a, it goes to 16% and then the other 84 is split between the two of us. 42, 42, 16. I'm hoping it's still a still image and you get the

• 53:29Speaker 01

  Guess who's not getting a one man show if I get to do that?

• 53:34Speaker 00

  Oh, you would never. No, this guy?

• 53:37Speaker 01

  Alright, wait. So what do we decide the weights are? Uh, 16 and then?

• 53:41Speaker 02

  42, 42. If it's 100%, if it's on a pie.

• 53:45Speaker 01

  This one is just straight up weights, so I think I can just put 42, 42 and 16.

• 53:51Speaker 02

  Math sounds right in my head.

• 53:52Speaker 01

  Okay, now all I have to do is share that one. There you go. You guys see that?

• 54:00Speaker 00

  Yes.

• 54:01Speaker 02

  One man shoe.

• 54:02Speaker 01

  One man shoe. I'll show you. It has a probability of 16%.

• 54:07Speaker 00

  I believe this. The perfectest crime aura one man show. It's all good except unless it lands on my

• 54:17Speaker 01

  Oh fuck. Oh my god. Okay.

• 54:20Speaker 02

  Oh, I thought it was.

• 54:21Speaker 01

  Wade wins!

• 54:26Speaker 00

  Well, alright, listen, I, I asked for bias and this is what I get. I can't believe it.

• 54:32Speaker 02

  I, I thought it was stopping in the yellow. It like paused in there.

• 54:36Speaker 01

  I'm happy that didn't happen.

• 54:38Speaker 02

  Well, thank God we made these wheel spins as easy as possible for Bob being not at home.

• 54:42Speaker 00

  Yeah, Bob, why don't you carry your wheels with you?

• 54:45Speaker 01

  Listen, it would be smart if I did that. Alright, Wade wins in a sudden death spinarama. There's no one man shows. Congratulations Wade. Would you like to give your winner's speech?

• 54:59Speaker 02

  It was a good, well-earned fight and I was in a bad mood going into this. Not really, but I'm in a better mood now. So, well done, Bob.

• 55:07Speaker 01

  I did it. Congratulations to all of us. Except Mark. Would you like to give your loser's speech?

• 55:12Speaker 00

  You both are really funny. You're, you're funny, you know that? But not in a ha-ha way. In a way that pisses me off. I'm pissed. And let me tell you, when I'm pissed...

• 55:29Speaker 00

  I don't, I don't get anything. I, I really don't know.

• 55:31Speaker 04

  Mark, you're being a dick!

• 55:32Speaker 02

  Thanks, Amy cut out.

• 55:34Speaker 00

  Somehow that makes me more mad. You sound like that guy I tried to interview. Guess what happened to him?

• 55:41Speaker 02

  Severance.

• 55:43Speaker 00

  Anyway, good TV show, but I've never seen it. So, I'm only going based off hearsay.

• 55:48Speaker 02

  Down, down, down, down, down. That's not Severance, that's Jackass.

• 55:51Speaker 00

  Yeah, I don't know what the fuck you were doing.

• 55:53Speaker 01

  Hi, my name's Johnny Knoxville and this is Severance.

• 55:56Speaker 00

  That could also be King of the Hill.

• 56:00Speaker 01

  Let's end this guy. I don't know. Let's end this.

• 56:03Speaker 02

  Okay, yeah.

• 56:04Speaker 01

  Wade wins. Wade hosts the next one. Thank God for that. That's gonna be it. Make sure you check out the merch at distractible.shop. Check out Mark and Mark flyer Wade at LordMinion777 or minion777. I am IceGirm. This has been Distractible. Make sure you follow the podcast. Uh, and then you'll know when there is the podcast. And, uh, thank you for listening and thank you for watching equally. Neither one of those is above the other. They're the same. You're the same. You know when I point and talk seriously that it's the truth. You're the same. Thank you, everybody. That's it. We'll see you in the next one. Uh, podcast out.

• 56:45Speaker 03

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