Late Credit Card Payments! w/ Kevin Ryan & H. Foley

Are You Garbage is back with Kevin Ryan and H. Foley for a family episode to answer your garbage questions from Patreon. It's a fun one! Thanks for watching AYG Comedy Podcast. Love youse guys. Come to a live show! AYG 2025 Live Shows: https://punchup.live/areyougarbage/tickets Watch Route 66: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OSkJS1gCDR4 Live Shows: https://punchup.live/areyougarbage/tickets PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/AreYouGarbage MERCH: https://areyougarbage.com/ Sponsored by: NOBL Travel: Don’t miss NOBL’s biggest Sale of the Year! Head to https://NOBLTravel.com for up to 62% off your entire order! BlueChew: https://bluechew.com Promo Code: Garbage Brunt Workwear: Get $10 Off at BRUNT with code GARBAGE at https://www.bruntworkwear.com/GARBAGE Comedians H. Foley and Kevin Ryan are self proclaimed GARBAGE. Each week a new stand up comedian gets put to the test. Steal shampoo from hotels? Own a George Foreman Grill? Ever worn JNCO Jeans? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Speaker 00

  We got new tour dates to announce, gang. Obviously, we got Philadelphia at the Met December 13th, but then we're headed to Austin, Tampa, Chicago, Bloomington, Indiana, Nashville, Tennessee. We got Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, and Cleveland, Ohio. Get your tickets right now. AreYouGarbage.com, the boys are coming.

• 0:18Speaker 01

  Welcome to another exciting edition of Are You Garbage? The show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals or absolute trash. Now, here are your hosts, Kevin Ryan and H. Foley.

• 0:38H. Foley?

  Hey, everybody out there, and welcome back to everybody's favorite podcast. This is Are You Garbage? It's our little show, we sit down with your favorite comedians, and we find out if they're going to be classy.

• 0:47Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 0:48H. Foley?

  Or just a big old piece of trash.

• 0:49Speaker 00

  Trash, trash, trash.

• 0:50H. Foley?

  I'm your host, H. Foley, coming at you on a beautiful day. We're out back here with Toody's and the new addition. She just got her picture in the paper.

• 0:57Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 0:58H. Foley?

  I don't know for what.

• 0:59Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 1:00H. Foley?

  My co-host is coming, H. Foley, across the table. He is the CEO of Are You Garbage? He's an international businessman, the kippy of the year, Kevin James Ryan, everybody.

• 1:09Speaker 00

  What up, gang? Shout out to you, as always, please make sure you rate, view, subscribe on iTunes. Full video available on YouTube. Full video available over there on Spotify, baby. And then, obviously, the greatest website of all time, www.patreon.com/areyougarbage. You go over there, you join the over 15,000 strong, baby.

• 1:25H. Foley?

  15K.

• 1:26Speaker 00

  15,000 Patreon members. That army of garbage, that battalion, that platoon is strong.

• 1:32H. Foley?

  That's about what Toody lost on the Eagles this weekend.

• 1:36Speaker 00

  And then, obviously, guys, we just launched a bunch of new dates. Go get your tickets. We got Austin, we got Tampa, we got Chicago. LA's coming soon. We got Bloomington and Indiana, a lot of places. Go to the website, check that. Philadelphia, the Met, that's coming up soon. Get them tickets, the boys are coming home to roost.

• 1:55H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 1:55Speaker 00

  And merch, merch is on sale.

• 1:57H. Foley?

  New merch!

• 1:58Speaker 00

  Boys got a lot, a lot of fucking things flying around up here.

• 2:00H. Foley?

  Get them Bugman tees.

• 2:03Speaker 00

  Plenty's still available while supplies last for the next five years.

• 2:08H. Foley?

  Nobody wants to remind you of the worst summer ever.

• 2:11H. Foley?

  I live in it. You know, I was just gonna say, um, one.

• 2:16Speaker 00

  The floor's yours.

• 2:17H. Foley?

  Apologize for the voice. Voice is coming and going a little bit. I got a Ludens in, which is the fat kid.

• 2:23Speaker 00

  Woo, man. Those didn't, those didn't make it home from the fucking Rite Aid that month when I was, when I was rolling. Back when I was banging.

• 2:31H. Foley?

  This shows you how, our, our good pal Ryan Diesel, Director of Operations, how good he is. Down at Skank Fest, the voice was really acting up. Said, "Give me some cough drops." Shows up with them. I was looking for a hole, something that actually works.

• 2:43Speaker 00

  Sure.

• 2:44H. Foley?

  But he knew to get fatty.

• 2:46Speaker 00

  Little sweet treat. Big dog likes a sweet treat.

• 2:49H. Foley?

  I just eat them like candy.

• 2:50Speaker 00

  Yeah, well, no, he.

• 2:50H. Foley?

  They're so good. What's it, they're.

• 2:53Speaker 00

  Why don't you, you gotta get a little more proactive on this.

• 2:55H. Foley?

  I, I have started.

• 2:56Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 2:57H. Foley?

  Saltwater rinses in the morning and stuff like that.

• 2:59Speaker 00

  Unfiltered cigarettes? Is that what you're doing? Unfiltered eaters? Bite them off. Um, I found myself in a little bit of a financial predicament.

• 3:10H. Foley?

  Nice.

• 3:11Speaker 00

  Welcome to the party.

• 3:12H. Foley?

  We are so fucking back, baby. Excellent.

• 3:16Speaker 00

  Can't have nothing nice.

• 3:17H. Foley?

  For closure.

• 3:18Speaker 00

  No. Jay, easy. I'm not that fucking sick. Don't put that juju on me. That hex. Um.

• 3:27Speaker 00

  I just got an email.

• 3:28H. Foley?

  Uh oh.

• 3:29Speaker 00

  This would be for the fourth month in a row I've gotten this email. And I've been able to throw some dance moves, some, some workarounds at it.

• 3:38H. Foley?

  Con Edison, shut off notice.

• 3:39Speaker 00

  No. You're not far off. Kevin, did you forget something? Let me tell you.

• 3:44H. Foley?

  What? That's how it opens?

• 3:46Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 3:48H. Foley?

  Who the fuck knows you like that?

• 3:49Speaker 00

  Synchrony Bank, who I'm on this sheet with. That's my Venmo credit card. I got the Venmo credit card back when my credit wasn't great and I needed some walking around money.

• 4:00H. Foley?

  I would argue it's probably not great now.

• 4:02Speaker 00

  What, my credit?

• 4:03H. Foley?

  What's your credit at?

• 4:04Speaker 00

  Ah, call it, you know, not great after this.

• 4:06H. Foley?

  Six.

• 4:07Speaker 00

  Ah, 705, I think. But then I run one up, you know, the birds don't cover. I gotta fucking dump some money back. Yeah.

• 4:17H. Foley?

  You still use this Venmo credit card?

• 4:19Speaker 00

  Yeah, occasionally. Some stuff's on it.

• 4:21H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 4:21Speaker 00

  I don't know what is. You can go over to transactions if you like.

• 4:26H. Foley?

  Off the air.

• 4:27Speaker 00

  You missed a payment, let's get back on track.

• 4:29H. Foley?

  Wow, that's pretty, that's like really going after the younger generation.

• 4:33Speaker 00

  What?

• 4:34H. Foley?

  Yo, bro, what's up?

• 4:36Speaker 00

  Pocket's a little light this month.

• 4:39H. Foley?

  I know you're waiting on something.

• 4:40Speaker 00

  They're coming with cool teacher vibes.

• 4:42H. Foley?

  Yeah, for sure.

• 4:43Speaker 00

  That's what they're trying to do.

• 4:44H. Foley?

  I know your project managing job is going well, and the DJ career is about to take off, but we're gonna need that cheddar. Sorry, bro. I can tell you who doesn't talk like that, the people at American Express.

• 4:56Speaker 00

  No, no, no, no, no, no. They operate by certified mail.

• 5:00H. Foley?

  Mr. Foley.

• 5:01Speaker 00

  To whom it may, hey, pudgy.

• 5:05H. Foley?

  When they call you.

• 5:06Speaker 00

  Oh, boy. Here's the problem, it's not accepting my bank, I try to put my bank, I can't, you know how it gives you that?

• 5:13H. Foley?

  Mr. Redd, unfortunately you have a credible financial institution that we don't work with.

• 5:19H. Foley?

  This guy's got a real bank!

• 5:21Speaker 00

  Well, you know you use that plaid to link your bank.

• 5:25H. Foley?

  Oh, my God.

• 5:25Speaker 00

  What, you don't do that? Is that bad?

• 5:28H. Foley?

  I do that.

• 5:29Speaker 00

  Yeah, I do that, why everyone's doing that?

• 5:31H. Foley?

  I don't think so.

• 5:32Speaker 00

  What do you mean?

• 5:33H. Foley?

  That's your...

• 5:34Speaker 00

  No, everyone does that.

• 5:35H. Foley?

  No.

• 5:36Speaker 00

  No?

• 5:37H. Foley?

  That's broke, bad news shit.

• 5:38Speaker 00

  Nuh-uh.

• 5:38H. Foley?

  I did that a couple days ago.

• 5:40Speaker 00

  I plaid, yeah, yeah.

• 5:41H. Foley?

  Sending a hail mary out.

• 5:42Speaker 00

  What? No. Do you use it? I'm always scared when I do, but yeah. Oh, I give up, just they got everything. They got it. They got it. If they want it, they got it. The emblem isn't nice enough for me? It's not, it's not, and you always get like, you're leaving the site, you're like, whoa, whoa, whoa! Fucking take me to a second location.

• 6:01H. Foley?

  You're leaving the site to a third party?

• 6:02Speaker 00

  Oh, authorization. But then, but then I see they, this is so funny, I see they got the pictures of like, the Wells Fargo, how they gonna, you can't find that anywhere, you know what I mean? That looks sanctioned.

• 6:13H. Foley?

  Oh, picking your bank?

• 6:14Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 6:15H. Foley?

  That's so trashy. What the fuck?

• 6:19Speaker 00

  But, it won't link, something's go to, you're already linked. And then I go, but I'm not linked. So then I try linking a check in, I try, I can't, I can't like nothing, I've been trying for months, and I'm late every month, it keeps dinging.

• 6:32H. Foley?

  How long, how long you been missing?

• 6:33Speaker 00

  Well, I found a workaround, I can pay the minimum with my...

• 6:37H. Foley?

  You need to have cash at the Venmo office? Did you tell us?

• 6:40Speaker 00

  I don't think so.

• 6:43H. Foley?

  Where's Venmo at? Where's their headquarters?

• 6:45Speaker 00

  Somebody get them on the phone.

• 6:47H. Foley?

  You can't. That's the problem with his generation.

• 6:50Speaker 00

  I remember.

• 6:50H. Foley?

  Nobody wants to talk.

• 6:51Speaker 00

  I remember you complaining you're on the phone with Venmo and I go, "Who the fuck's gotta call that?" Uh, me now, I gotta call Venmo. So, listen, here's my workaround and I need help. If you guys are my sharks, I need help.

• 7:03H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 7:04Speaker 00

  I need some-

• 7:04H. Foley?

  I don't have any cash on me. You can take some from petty cash if you need it, but you gotta put that back.

• 7:11Speaker 00

  That's crazy, you know the rules, which means you've been nipping into the petty cash.

• 7:15H. Foley?

  No. I assume that would be highly frowned upon.

• 7:18Speaker 00

  If you just started taking money from me, yeah, that'd be pretty frowned upon.

• 7:21H. Foley?

  Taking money from you?

• 7:23Speaker 00

  You're not putting money in there. Yeah, it's not a... I'm not going to check to petty cashers as an extra C note walking around.

• 7:29H. Foley?

  That's t-shirt change, you don't care about that. A rich guy like you, wearing plaid?

• 7:35Speaker 00

  I am wearing plaid, um...

• 7:37H. Foley?

  It's a bad name. Plaid, you'll never see us coming.

• 7:41Speaker 00

  Plaid, we'll blend right in. We rob ya. Hiding in plain sight, Plaid.

• 7:47H. Foley?

  Well, what is that?

• 7:48Speaker 00

  Well, they're never gonna be a sponsor, um...

• 7:50H. Foley?

  Who thinks of that?

• 7:51Speaker 00

  Hold on, that's a brilliant... Hold on. So, here's my thing, I've been able to make the minimum payment for a while.

• 7:58H. Foley?

  Right.

• 7:58Speaker 00

  Cause I ha... I carried a balance in my Venmo. And you can pa... I can... Cause I can't link a-

• 8:04H. Foley?

  Pay me with your Venmo, with your Venmo-

• 8:05Speaker 00

  I can pay with the balance, but I don't have enough, so I've just been making the minimum payment. Now, but I... That's not... Now, I don't have any money in my Venmo, so one of ya has to Venmo me money so I can make a payment today. I assume that's not gonna be you. I assume I'm... I assume I'm looking at the Dempsey Group for this one. Okay.

• 8:24H. Foley?

  This is what he's been waiting for.

• 8:26Speaker 00

  Luke. Luke's now... Oh, this is bad, Luke, this is the corporate takeover. This is the squeeze out.

• 8:32H. Foley?

  Uh-huh.

• 8:32Speaker 00

  He's got me right... Did your mom orchestrate this, you sandbag and son of a-

• 8:36Speaker 03

  Funny, cause my mom always wants... Always wants to send Venmo money, cause she just gets and she doesn't, like, transfer it to her account.

• 8:43Speaker 00

  So, yeah, so she-

• 8:44H. Foley?

  So, she leaves it in Venmo?

• 8:45Speaker 03

  Mrs. Dempsey would gladly send you-

• 8:47Speaker 00

  No, I don't... I don't need that fucking shark swimming around here.

• 8:51H. Foley?

  Wow, she just leaves it in there.

• 8:52Speaker 03

  Yeah. She got it.

• 8:54Speaker 00

  You wouldn't do that.

• 8:55H. Foley?

  No.

• 8:56Speaker 00

  No.

• 8:56H. Foley?

  I need it.

• 8:57Speaker 00

  Well, I got a current minimum due of a hundred and one. That includes the past due balance of the forty-one dollars. That was due ten days ago.

• 9:07Speaker 03

  What's... What's it take to get you cleared?

• 9:09Speaker 00

  Current balance?

• 9:12H. Foley?

  You're dreaming.

• 9:14Speaker 00

  You don't pay currently.

• 9:15H. Foley?

  Currently broke. Up top.

• 9:19Speaker 00

  Hit me low. Where I'm at. Maybe where my balance is.

• 9:22H. Foley?

  I'm at my Venmo limit. I'm sorry, I can't help you for another 24 hours.

• 9:25Speaker 00

  My current balance has been sitting like this for a while out of its interest because I've just been paying a minimum payment for about four to six months.

• 9:31H. Foley?

  What are you doing?

• 9:32Speaker 00

  What?

• 9:32H. Foley?

  Supposed to be the, you're a business owner.

• 9:35Speaker 00

  Yeah, we run a garbage operation here. What do you mean?

• 9:38H. Foley?

  I like that I'm do that. I expect you to run the books clean.

• 9:41Speaker 00

  This is clean?

• 9:42Speaker 03

  Now, what does a company like Venmo charge you for interest?

• 9:45Speaker 00

  Oh, I don't, I don't.

• 9:47Speaker 03

  Because the Dempsey Group might be doubling that.

• 9:49Speaker 00

  Four tokens.

• 9:52Speaker 00

  No, I don't know. I don't have my phone on me either, but it is.

• 9:55H. Foley?

  Three gift boxes and two pizza slice emojis.

• 9:57Speaker 00

  See what they charge. But I can get better money on the street if you know what I mean.

• 10:02H. Foley?

  Better points in the street.

• 10:06Speaker 00

  I remember my cousin yelling at like fucking Wachovia Bank or something. Dude, this is, shout out, shout out my cousin Leo. This is when overdraft just got instituted.

• 10:16H. Foley?

  When was that?

• 10:18Speaker 00

  This is 15, 20 years ago, something. This is a long time.

• 10:21H. Foley?

  Overdraft hasn't always been a thing?

• 10:22Speaker 00

  No, well not like debit cards weren't like, you know, you didn't have the overdraft protection. Once they realized it could make a shit ton of money and they whack you out every charge. So if you buy a package of like, you know.

• 10:32H. Foley?

  As letting the charge go through.

• 10:34Speaker 00

  They're gonna charge you 35 bucks.

• 10:36H. Foley?

  That's so smart.

• 10:37Speaker 00

  So my cousin, I remember my cousin ran through it in like a weekend, just not knowing, just going, I got the overdraft. You know, you're charging me the 35 bucks. He didn't realize he's getting whacked out every time. And I remember him calling the bank the next, the Monday morning. He's going. They were sitting.

• 10:56H. Foley?

  I'll fucking kill myself!

• 10:58Speaker 00

  He's going, we're sitting in Port Richmond, sitting in a room at Port Richmond, I'm hungover to the gills.

• 11:05Speaker 00

  And, uh, he goes, uh, he's screaming at this lady on the bank from Wachovia and he's going,

• 11:11H. Foley?

  "Hey, fuck you, Mary."

• 11:12Speaker 00

  He's going, "You telling me I buy a pack of gum for a dollar, you charge me thirty-five dollars on top of that?" And she goes, "Yes, that's how we do it." He goes, "I get cheaper money on the street, goddammit." I go, "She don't care." I'm like, "You're not negotiating with her."

• 11:27H. Foley?

  Don't take one or two off. That's the best they do.

• 11:29Speaker 00

  Okay, TD used to be two every six months. What's the current?

• 11:33Speaker 03

  The penalty APR rate.

• 11:35Speaker 00

  Oh, fuck.

• 11:36Speaker 03

  Is twenty-seven forty-nine.

• 11:40H. Foley?

  That's a lot of gum.

• 11:42Speaker 00

  I owe six fifty-three fifty-nine.

• 11:44H. Foley?

  Six fifty-three fifty-nine.

• 11:46Speaker 00

  And then I'm cutting it in half, I'm never using it again.

• 11:48Speaker 03

  You want it right now?

• 11:51Speaker 00

  After. I don't, I don't, I don't need this documented. For, if you ever try to sue, come after me for, uh, ten percent of the company, I can always say, "This was part of a comedy bit."

• 12:01H. Foley?

  You have six hundred in your Venmo?

• 12:02Speaker 00

  No, it's linked to your card.

• 12:04H. Foley?

  Wow.

• 12:05Speaker 00

  He's got six hundred dollars.

• 12:06Speaker 03

  I got plat.

• 12:07Speaker 00

  He's plat it up.

• 12:09Speaker 03

  Plat it up.

• 12:09H. Foley?

  I don't know if I am linked like that, to be honest with you. I think it's just in there. I got nothing in there.

• 12:14Speaker 00

  You gotta, you gotta go to a Venmo ATM, feed money in. Um, but I will need to take care of that today, cause I ju, I also just got an email that I'm getting dinged on my credit report again for that, cause I'm late every month. And I can't figure it out. That's how they get you. This is how Big Bang gets you. I don't like it.

• 12:34Speaker 03

  Going through my transactions, I'm seeing I requested eighty-seven dollars from Kevin Ryan.

• 12:39H. Foley?

  Did you get that?

• 12:40Speaker 03

  Nope, it's still sitting. I should remind him, actually. I'm gonna remind him right now.

• 12:45H. Foley?

  Oh, there's reminders on there? Oh my god.

• 12:47Speaker 00

  And he's got the balls, talk about sending.

• 12:49H. Foley?

  Does he send them?

• 12:50Speaker 00

  He'll send reminders.

• 12:51H. Foley?

  Eighty-seven dollars?

• 12:52Speaker 00

  He'll send me screenshots.

• 12:53H. Foley?

  All the bottles of wine, lunches, you're shitting the guy there for eighty-seven dollars?

• 12:57Speaker 03

  To write off.

• 12:58Speaker 00

  What else is on there? Not, none of your, hit my personal account up.

• 13:02Speaker 03

  Uh.

• 13:03Speaker 00

  He's got a couple sent, I know.

• 13:04Speaker 03

  It was just the two, yeah.

• 13:05H. Foley?

  Do we have an AYG Venmo?

• 13:06Speaker 00

  Uh huh.

• 13:07H. Foley?

  Cool. Doing pretty good.

• 13:10Speaker 00

  Got a card on it. What, what's the other one?

• 13:11Speaker 03

  Uh, it was just for, uh, fifty-four bucks.

• 13:14Speaker 00

  Small potatoes to a guy like that.

• 13:17H. Foley?

  Yeah, a rich guy like you can't pay his credit card bill.

• 13:21Speaker 00

  I'm one of those rich guys that stiffen everybody around town.

• 13:25H. Foley?

  I'm what they call cash poor. Now, we sell all this, we're doing pretty good.

• 13:30Speaker 00

  But there's, you're, what are you, what are you, shopping this around? You're on LoopNet at a podcast. That's where you buy and sell businesses. It's like Zillow for business. It's a picture of me and you.

• 13:44H. Foley?

  Doing well.

• 13:46H. Foley?

  Ah, that's alright. You have $600 in your Venmo?

• 13:49Speaker 00

  Kevin, why don't you check out your Venmo? I don't have my phone on me. 660, you're away. No, no, I'm, no, I'm denying it. It's already sick.

• 13:58H. Foley?

  What are you skidding him? Don't take more!

• 13:59Speaker 00

  I'm not touching anything. Diesel, just throw my phone off a bridge.

• 14:03H. Foley?

  Listen, you tell your parents.

• 14:05Speaker 00

  What do you want? You want something, I'll send something your way too. Now, Lee, you got him. You should have went to him first, you idiot. That's how you, you should have just sent him a hundred bucks. He'd be all over you.

• 14:18H. Foley?

  You buy me, you kill him.

• 14:21H. Foley?

  Can't buy a man with morals.

• 14:24Speaker 00

  Next episode, you're back there, he's here. I'm doing a show with Luke, you're back there. Fucking cameras are all upside down and shit.

• 14:31H. Foley?

  400 bucks!

• 14:34Speaker 00

  Said he'd buy me dinner. Oh, you stink. Uh, but all that's neither here nor there.

• 14:39H. Foley?

  I was gonna say, you tell your family, this company is not for sale.

• 14:43Speaker 00

  Unless they come with a check. Guy like you? Guy like you. You would sell the popsicle stand for nothing.

• 14:53H. Foley?

  What do you mean?

• 14:54Speaker 00

  You'd sell it for a pack of Ludens.

• 14:57H. Foley?

  Got one left.

• 15:03H. Foley?

  We still have to do the show. We still get to do the show.

• 15:07Speaker 00

  Yeah, well, who would buy the show without us?

• 15:11H. Foley?

  Couple of these Russians.

• 15:15Speaker 00

  Couple of these Chechen guys I got on the hook.

• 15:21Speaker 00

  Welcome back!

• 15:25H. Foley?

  They're gonna turn tooties into a brothel.

• 15:27Speaker 00

  We're fucking these guys.

• 15:32Speaker 00

  That's great.

• 15:33H. Foley?

  I like the one in the hit. The one in the what? The hit. It's a hit. The hit.

• 15:39Speaker 00

  It's like the No Jumper pod where you podcast for an hour and then you guys fuck after.

• 15:45Speaker 00

  We're sitting here, we're sitting here interviewing guys from the Kremlin and then they fuck us.

• 15:53Speaker 00

  Can we release this?

• 15:58H. Foley?

  I was gonna say it's just me and you every week.

• 16:02H. Foley?

  We just bang?

• 16:02Speaker 00

  I'm going, what, no guest again? You're like, I don't know, they said, they said no guest.

• 16:10Speaker 00

  Ah, fuck.

• 16:11H. Foley?

  Jane Wilder's running late, so it's gonna be you and me.

• 16:16H. Foley?

  Ah, it's funny.

• 16:16Speaker 00

  Alright.

• 16:17H. Foley?

  Kent, let's talk about Noble Travel.

• 16:18Speaker 00

  Woo, Noble, Noble, Noble!

• 16:20H. Foley?

  We're talking about the best zipperless luggage out there in the game dang gang. Do yourself a favor, we're talking about Noble Travel.

• 16:27Speaker 00

  Mm-hmm.

• 16:27H. Foley?

  Do you ever think about how easy it is to break your luggage?

• 16:30Speaker 00

  I didn't, but now, now with Noble, you think about it.

• 16:33H. Foley?

  Constantly leaving your luggage room with the hotel staff, airline employees, you know what they like to do? Like to dig through and find your stuff.

• 16:39Speaker 00

  Snoopy doo.

• 16:40H. Foley?

  Yeah, what Elvis say, bell hops, huh? Route through your luggage and get your stuff. Talking about a ballpoint pen that can pierce luggage zippers in seconds.

• 16:48Speaker 00

  Mm-hmm.

• 16:48H. Foley?

  Your zipper's boom, bang, right in there. What you wanna do is you wanna get Noble Travel. That's your passport, you got laptops in there, what are you gonna do? Noble completely removes the zipper, it's zipperless, latch look suitcase that closes like a safe.

• 17:02Speaker 00

  Yeah, it's two halves meet with a tight seal, you hear it and you feel it when it clicks and it locks, baby. Suck it right.

• 17:07H. Foley?

  Nobody's getting in there.

• 17:08Speaker 00

  Nah, tight, airtight, baby. Um, guys, Noble's fantastic, they sent it to us, we travel with it now, and you feel safe. It's not that thing, you're not gonna worry it's coming out of the luggage thing, all your clothes, your belongings are floating everywhere. You know, it's, all of your stuff is secure. Uh, it's got built-in, uh, charging ports to keep your phone alive at the gate, no more crouching next to a random outlet for 5% looking like a bozo. Uh, front laptop pocket makes it TSA breeze, zip it right out, boom, plug it right back in. They have over 500,000 suitcases sold and the highest rated luggage brand in the category by TrustPilot. Noble gives you the real travel peace of mind, security, design and convenience all in one. For a limited time Noble is giving the biggest sale ever. Head to nobltravel.com

• 17:52Speaker 00

  for up to 58% off your entire order. That's a lot of stuff. That's Noble, N-O-B-L-E, travel.com for 58% off. After you purchase, or I ask you how you heard about them, please support the show and tell them the boy sent you. Do it.

• 18:06H. Foley?

  Kim, let's talk about BlueChew.

• 18:08Speaker 00

  Knock, knock, boner down.

• 18:09H. Foley?

  In a world with limp noodles, you want to go for BlueChew this holiday season? If you want to knock her out of the bedroom. We're talking about delivered straight to your door in discreet packaging. BlueChew dissolves under the tongue and works in as little as 15 minutes. That means you can get it on quicker and stay in the game longer. Hello.

• 18:29Speaker 00

  But don't pop it too quick. Don't be doing it before you leave for dinner. Otherwise, the subway ride is going to be a little awkward.

• 18:35H. Foley?

  Embarrass yourself in a coat check.

• 18:36Speaker 00

  I know, don't be doing that. Next time you get the you up text, make sure you are ready. Make life easier by getting harder and discover your options at bluechew.com. They got a special offer for our listeners. You get 10% off your first month of BlueChew with the code garbage. That's promo code garbage. Visit bluechew.com for more details and important safety information. Forget about Netflix and chill, it's Netflix and Phil, baby. If your bed could talk after this, it'd be asking for a break. How you doing? Full ignition in 15 minutes or less. And listen, this ain't your grandpa's little blue pill. This is high quality stuff we're talking about.

• 19:17H. Foley?

  BlueChew.

• 19:19Speaker 00

  Back with a vengeance.

• 19:20H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 19:21Speaker 00

  Visit bluechew.com for more promo, for more details, important safety information. We thank BlueChew for sponsoring the podcast.

• 19:27H. Foley?

  Yes, we do. We love you.

• 19:28Speaker 00

  As I tried to state before you took this show into the gutter, that's not the new program and we're doing around here. It's still a family episode regardless of how much debt I may or may not be in.

• 19:37H. Foley?

  Next week, we're going all country.

• 19:40Speaker 00

  As you know, that's Gosh darn Family episode. When you join the old Patreon, we'll answer your garbage questions on the air. That being said, let's get into it.

• 19:50H. Foley?

  Please.

• 19:52Speaker 00

  This isn't the same world. This is taking down big bank institutions. This is from Mitchell. "Are you garbage if you make people or companies chase you down for a new credit card numbers after you switch banks?" "I did it and I've switched my card recently and I've been letting cards decline all over town. If they really need it, they'll come find me. I operate the same way."

• 20:12H. Foley?

  Really?

• 20:13Speaker 00

  Yeah. They're gonna alert you that this didn't, like, you'll get email. "Hey, this didn't go through."

• 20:17H. Foley?

  Like bills and stuff.

• 20:18Speaker 00

  When I get a, yeah, when I get a new debit card, I'm not like logging into Con Ed and changing my account.

• 20:24H. Foley?

  I always thought that it did it automatically.

• 20:26Speaker 00

  Whoa.

• 20:28H. Foley?

  Might explain the lights off in my house and the weird gas smell.

• 20:37H. Foley?

  I hate all that shit.

• 20:38Speaker 00

  Dude, I gotta-

• 20:39H. Foley?

  I'm sick of it.

• 20:40Speaker 00

  I gotta change the mail. I don't know how to-

• 20:42H. Foley?

  The mail?

• 20:43Speaker 00

  I moved.

• 20:43H. Foley?

  I told you. Remember when, when, when we were talking about switching apartments? That one, and you said it was so ridiculous, but that's what I thought about the most.

• 20:51Speaker 00

  What?

• 20:52H. Foley?

  Change your license to fucking mail to this, to that. I hate all that shit. But I really hate all the electronic stuff.

• 21:00Speaker 00

  Yeah, I just, I don't mind it and I, it is like such a burden hanging over you. And it is like what responsibility, like responsible people. That's something Luc would do. Luc would get his new car, they pull it up, they could log into all the different things.

• 21:13H. Foley?

  He'd sit on his little laptop, had his breakfast nook with his fruit bowl.

• 21:18Speaker 00

  And half of this company.

• 21:22Speaker 00

  "What'd the fat one say today?" He's, he's got a newspaper open. Piece of shit. "Oh, what's AYG trading at?"

• 21:29H. Foley?

  Hankin'.

• 21:31Speaker 00

  Apparently got, got mixed up in a Venmo scandal. Diesel's my Alfred just reading me what you got, a report? I don't know. The fat one called the bald one bald and the bald one called the fat one fat.

• 21:42H. Foley?

  That's great.

• 21:43Speaker 00

  More at 11. Yeah, I don't, I'm bad with all that and I'm, I get it from my dad. We never used to let, we never used to open the mail. Um, I, I'm the same, I don't like read.

• 21:55H. Foley?

  Why?

• 21:55Speaker 00

  It's bad news. No one's, no one's going, hey.

• 21:58H. Foley?

  No, I'm agreeing with you.

• 21:58Speaker 00

  You know, oh, here's that check for 500 you were looking for. That's never the case. It's you. I remember stacks. And I remember going to them at some point and going, you gotta, listen, I'm as irresponsible as the next guy.

• 22:10H. Foley?

  I'm running out of places to eat my cereal.

• 22:12Speaker 00

  But you're gonna have to fucking do something about this. I remember, and then, you know, the colors get more and more severe as things go on.

• 22:22Speaker 00

  I don't, I don't know, Luke, I don't know if you and the Dempsey's ever received fucking hot pink envelopes, but they want, that's their money and they want it now.

• 22:29H. Foley?

  Getting a yellow one is scary.

• 22:31Speaker 00

  Yeah, something bright red, yikes. Um.

• 22:37H. Foley?

  You can't scare me with an envelope.

• 22:38Speaker 00

  I have that, yeah, you can't, I'm, at this point, you know, in our early days of comedy, you become so, so broke that it's like, you can't, shut it down. I mean, I've had fucking, I've defaulted on student loan, I've done everything.

• 22:51H. Foley?

  You wanna come after me, Ven? Well, my life's on fire right now.

• 22:54Speaker 00

  My dad had a great line. Someone's like, I'll fucking take your ass to court or something. He goes, get in line. That also goes around the block. I said, goddamn, I'm writing that down. Something like, I'll kick your ass. He goes, get in line. That also starts around the block. Probably taking a, fucking ripping a mar bread, drinking a Michelob. There you go.

• 23:16H. Foley?

  It's hard to beat a man with no fear.

• 23:18Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 23:19H. Foley?

  Nothing to lose.

• 23:20Speaker 00

  Nothing, yeah. That's why like I do, I used to have anx- like, a lot of my anxiety is gone now that just like I can keep the, like, that everything's just, I'm, I can't, I'd have to severely fuck this up. Try, try hit him. Try, hit him. To, you know, I, I've slowed down enough in my life that that's not

• 23:44Speaker 00

  relatively possible. You know what I mean? I hope not. But.

• 23:47H. Foley?

  Me too.

• 23:49Speaker 00

  Depends if the fucking Dempsey group bamboozles me and takes all my proxy votes.

• 23:54H. Foley?

  Well, that's always our parachute.

• 23:56Speaker 00

  What? Sell to Luke's dad?

• 23:58H. Foley?

  Something does happen. A PR thing. Sell to Luke. They'll sweep it under the rug. Kill who they gotta kill.

• 24:04Speaker 00

  Sure.

• 24:04H. Foley?

  Pay off who they gotta pay off. Put us to work.

• 24:09Speaker 00

  Yeah, that's what I want.

• 24:09Speaker 03

  They're starting the farm. We'll just be farmhands podcasting out in the land.

• 24:14H. Foley?

  Huh?

• 24:14Speaker 03

  They're starting like a farm. They're doing like a lot of like

• 24:17Speaker 00

  That's rich guy tax shit. They get one sheep, three chickens, and then they go, "Do you have livestock?" And they go, "I do."

• 24:22H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 24:22Speaker 00

  "I only pay 4% in fucking property tax or some shit." That's dirtbag shit. I know people that did that.

• 24:28H. Foley?

  Mom selling eggs out to farmers market?

• 24:30Speaker 00

  Yeah, they'd be in South Philly with fucking two roosters going, "Yeah, this is, you know, this is farm to table." Shit like that. Nah, dude. Not buying it.

• 24:42H. Foley?

  Dempsey's in sheep's clothing coming in swooping us.

• 24:47Speaker 00

  That reminds me, I was talking to my cousin, uh, Michael. Shout out to Michael. I hit him up, uh, he hit me up. And he was, it's kinda funny, we sold out of the Forex of the Carhartts, the Carhartt shirts immediately.

• 25:00H. Foley?

  Love it.

• 25:00Speaker 00

  The bootleg Carhartt shirts immediately. And he goes, "Oh, it's funny, that's the only thing sold out." And I go, "Oh, don't buy it. I'll, you know, I'll give me, I'm like, give me your address and say, you know, what size do you want?"

• 25:09H. Foley?

  On your Venmo account.

• 25:10Speaker 00

  I go, "Give me, give me your address and what size you want."

• 25:13H. Foley?

  Pay what? Pay my credit card bill?

• 25:16Speaker 00

  Yeah, whatever you want.

• 25:18H. Foley?

  You just had Luke pay your credit card bill?

• 25:19Speaker 00

  Luke didn't, no, no, no.

• 25:22H. Foley?

  Money's in the account.

• 25:23Speaker 00

  I didn't touch it. I can deny that. I can, I can say, I can, I can claim fraud.

• 25:27H. Foley?

  I'm just saying.

• 25:28Speaker 00

  What?

• 25:29H. Foley?

  We're four year, five years into this. Luke's paying your credit card bill?

• 25:33Speaker 00

  Blame

• 25:33H. Foley?

  I'm tanking.

• 25:34Speaker 00

  Blame

• 25:35H. Foley?

  Diesel's Italian. We're screwed.

• 25:38Speaker 03

  That's how well you're doing.

• 25:40H. Foley?

  Why?

• 25:41Speaker 03

  I mean, his money didn't come from thin air.

• 25:44Speaker 00

  Yeah. His money's my money. It's like, we're married. You know what I mean?

• 25:49H. Foley?

  You put it that way.

• 25:51Speaker 00

  Send me five on it. Uh...

• 25:53H. Foley?

  Keep the rain off my back for a couple of days.

• 25:56Speaker 00

  And I'm just so bad and so dumb when it comes to the tech. I will never, my problem is I will never figure this out. I will never figure out, it just won't take it. And I'm just done. And I'm gonna have to, I'm gonna have to, I, I still pay my spectrum bill by them shutting it off and me calling. If I'm on the road, Nadine will text me, "Hey, did you pay the bill?" And it's out. And then I'm gonna have to call and it'll go, "I gotta go through the whole rigmarole." And it goes, "Hey, your service may or may not be turned off." I go, "What? That's crazy. Talk to Luke about this."

• 26:32Speaker 00

  I'm, dude, I'm just, we, we're not good at paying bills. No one in my family ever has been.

• 26:41H. Foley?

  Thirty, thirty people.

• 26:42Speaker 00

  Sure.

• 26:43H. Foley?

  Yeah, Irish.

• 26:43Speaker 00

  This is more for the big man. This is from Sticky Vicky.

• 26:45H. Foley?

  Please, hey Vic.

• 26:46Speaker 00

  Earliest acceptable time to get a Slurpee?

• 26:48H. Foley?

  Hmm, interesting question.

• 26:51Speaker 00

  I have my time and my reasons.

• 26:54H. Foley?

  Um, I would say a gentleman

• 26:58H. Foley?

  gets a Slurpee at 11 or after.

• 27:01Speaker 00

  I think that's the gentleman call. I will push back on this, as I've had to as a fat ass most of my life.

• 27:10Speaker 00

  When I was working for my family's company, I could start early.

• 27:15H. Foley?

  Very true.

• 27:16Speaker 00

  So if you're up at 6.

• 27:17H. Foley?

  Very, and you're up at 6, not one day, but a multiple of days.

• 27:21Speaker 00

  Your lunchtime gets shifted up. I'd be doing a hot dog 10 a.m. I think that, you know, so.

• 27:29H. Foley?

  What time would you guys quit?

• 27:31Speaker 00

  It depends.

• 27:32H. Foley?

  4:05?

• 27:33Speaker 00

  No, no.

• 27:34H. Foley?

  Earlier?

• 27:34Speaker 00

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 27:35H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 27:35Speaker 00

  It depends. 6 to, I mean, it really, 7 to 3 was probably typical, give or take.

• 27:42H. Foley?

  My only problem with the early lunch.

• 27:43Speaker 00

  Early starts, early quits are nice, though. Getting an early start.

• 27:46H. Foley?

  Yeah, yeah, early starts, early quits are nice, but the early lunch can be... When you have more hours after lunch than before lunch? It sucks. God, that sucks.

• 27:58Speaker 00

  Man, where, when I was working in a cubicle, you'd wanna take it just to get out of the fucking office. So you'd take it like 90 minutes after you got there and you go, "Fuck! I've got nine hours left today." Swirling in my chair and shit. I could, I could kill myself.

• 28:13H. Foley?

  Two pencils in your mouth like a walrus? I tell you, not to bring it up, but that Sopranos did it great. When Vito was working for that lady up in New Hampshire, and he's doing the internal monologue with the watch? He's like, "10 o'clock, gotta be. Look at the position of the sun."

• 28:28Speaker 00

  Yes.

• 28:29H. Foley?

  It's like 9:45, he freaks out.

• 28:31Speaker 00

  I mean, yeah, the manual labor of it all.

• 28:35H. Foley?

  Only rich guys talk like that. Yeah, no labor at all.

• 28:39Speaker 00

  Well, when you're busy, it's good. When you're like actually doing, it's like, it's the time when you're like, oh, it's fucking...

• 28:46H. Foley?

  Start losing it.

• 28:47Speaker 00

  When you have to look busy, for a long time in the office, I had to look busy. Ah, you know, you're doing the Costanza, you're like shaking your head, making copies, just fucking...

• 28:56H. Foley?

  You're just talking to Vinnie with the skinny.

• 28:58Speaker 00

  Listening to a lot of, uh...

• 29:01H. Foley?

  Could you listen to have headphones on?

• 29:03Speaker 00

  Yeah, I could have one in. One over, the hidden one, cause like I would, this was against the wall, so I could have one here.

• 29:10Speaker 00

  I'd plug, I'd plug my headphones into the computer, into the tower, and I'd watch YouTube, have that YouTube playing in the background. Uh huh.

• 29:22H. Foley?

  What a schlub.

• 29:23Speaker 00

  People, yeah, people come, yeah, it was... It was bad.

• 29:28Speaker 00

  I used to, I used to, I mean, my job there was opening mail, too. Like, I was paying other people's bills. Paying rich people's bills, and man, I would hide that shit.

• 29:38H. Foley?

  What do you mean?

• 29:39Speaker 00

  I just wouldn't fucking open it. I would just, I'd put it in a drawer, and that drawer would get so full, and I'd have to go like, I would, I would just start running shit through the chopper. Just start mulching, going, it has never happened, you can't prove, you can't prove I ever got this. I start giving them my dirtbag, you know what I mean? I never signed for this. How the fuck I, you know, I got it. Do you see my signature on that, on that bill? I don't think so.

• 30:06H. Foley?

  That's all shredded.

• 30:09H. Foley?

  Can't tell whose signature is...

• 30:11Speaker 00

  Yeah. Um... Alright, let's see here. This is from Brennan. $10 home here. Is it garbage that my mom called me from an all-inclusive resort in Mexico to buy her a Powerball ticket? That's...

• 30:24H. Foley?

  That's, that's...

• 30:26Speaker 00

  What it's all about.

• 30:27H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 30:27Speaker 00

  If that's not the duality of trash.

• 30:29H. Foley?

  That's garbage.

• 30:30Speaker 00

  You got a couple, but maybe, maybe the whole, maybe the whole trip was put on your Venmo credit card, and you're down there spending money you ain't got, but you're looking at home going, why don't you give me...

• 30:39H. Foley?

  See if we can wash this away.

• 30:40Speaker 00

  Yeah, get me a 401K, you know what I mean? I respect that.

• 30:44H. Foley?

  That, uh, that definitely started at a hotel pool bar where they were talking. I gotta call my son to make sure he pays the, plays the Powerball for me. My son's playing for me.

• 30:52Speaker 00

  That, and you wait, did you hear what it's at today? 912 million. Oh, really? I gotta call my son to buy tickets.

• 30:59H. Foley?

  That is a very garbage signal to another human being.

• 31:04H. Foley?

  See what the Powerball's at?

• 31:06Speaker 00

  Mm-hmm.

• 31:06H. Foley?

  Nine billion. Yeah? Would you stop driving the cab if you won that?

• 31:13Speaker 00

  Tell you what I'd do the next day. Come right the way, oh, would you? Fucking, I'd come in, nevermind. Come in and, come in and, open up all that mail I haven't opened yet.

• 31:24H. Foley?

  I always say I wouldn't tell anybody.

• 31:27H. Foley?

  Keep it quiet. For a little bit. I definitely wouldn't do that TV shit.

• 31:32Speaker 00

  Yeah, I mean, I think a lot of it's, it tends to be public. I think, certain states have certain rules. Cause I know people have scammed it and tried to send like a, depending on where you claim, I think you gotta go.

• 31:44H. Foley?

  But you don't gotta be on camera. You could say you wanna be private.

• 31:46Speaker 00

  Nah, but, yeah, I don't know. I don't, I, I just know different states have different regulations. That's all I know. I'm not saying...

• 31:51H. Foley?

  I'll throw acid on my face then.

• 31:55Speaker 00

  But I always wear ski masks.

• 31:57H. Foley?

  What do you got, Luke?

• 31:58Speaker 03

  Uh, depends completely on state. Uh... Certain, Arizona, Arkansas, Georgia, you're allowed to like, hide yourself. All like, yeah.

• 32:06H. Foley?

  Georgia knows what's up.

• 32:07Speaker 00

  Arizona, yeah.

• 32:08H. Foley?

  Shout out to the Bulldogs.

• 32:09Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 32:10H. Foley?

  Arizona, that's where you go to disappear.

• 32:12Speaker 00

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hey, come on over. We'll burn your fingerprints off here too. We'll do it all, we'll cash a check and fucking...

• 32:19H. Foley?

  Why is it always Arizona with the, uh...

• 32:21Speaker 00

  They're cowboys.

• 32:22H. Foley?

  When you go into Whitsack.

• 32:23Speaker 00

  Oh, cause nothing's out there. They just dump you out there. That's the furthest away from the mob. Ain't no fucking man, fucking wise guys going down there. You know what I mean?

• 32:32H. Foley?

  Out of shit. Can't wear shark skin suit.

• 32:37H. Foley?

  Have your parents ever played the lottery?

• 32:39Speaker 03

  Yeah, when it got really big. I remember when I was like 10, my dad bought some Mega Millions and stuff like that.

• 32:44H. Foley?

  Did he?

• 32:44Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 32:44H. Foley?

  I bet he did.

• 32:45Speaker 00

  My stepdad.

• 32:46H. Foley?

  No, this has become interesting.

• 32:49Speaker 00

  I remember my stepdad having a stack of fucking Powerballs. Cause he was also like the dirtbag that didn't wanna throw it away in case it was, it had a dollar on it or, you know what I mean? He wasn't gonna check it.

• 32:59H. Foley?

  Check them tickets!

• 33:00Speaker 00

  Yeah, but dude, it was a stack, right above, in his, in the visor. That's a true dirtbag thing too. The amount of paper in a visor. Of your, of your beat up SUV for, ah, my dad had toll receipts. I get, you always get paid cash and got a receipt and they would be like, ah, it's brutal. That, and I still do it when I have to pull the ticket for like the, if you're in a car without the EZ Pass, that goes right up there. Don't forget that.

• 33:26H. Foley?

  Like a Saint, Saint Christopher.

• 33:27Speaker 00

  Oh, yeah.

• 33:28H. Foley?

  Watching up for you. We had this old guy, Phil, that used to work in the kitchen at Blue Bell Inn when I worked there as a kid. And those guys lived in the, like, one wing of the building, like the professional kitchen guys. And, uh, he would always give you like a dollar or two to check, check his tickets for him.

• 33:44Speaker 00

  Nice.

• 33:45H. Foley?

  Couldn't read. Like proper couldn't read.

• 33:47Speaker 00

  Sure. Ah, all losers again. You're, you're in a Lambo.

• 33:51H. Foley?

  Great old guy. If you got cut from work for screwing around, the owner would come in, "Get out of here, you're done for tonight." Just toss you out.

• 33:57Speaker 00

  Work in the 1940s?

• 33:59H. Foley?

  Who the fuck?

• 34:00Speaker 00

  Hey, quit playing grab ass, boy. You're off the line.

• 34:03H. Foley?

  Mr. Lamprec, that's kind of the way he sounded.

• 34:04Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 34:05H. Foley?

  Awesome place to work. Um, you go up and hang out with Phil. If he, if he was off. He was older, so sometimes he would, he wouldn't, you know, wouldn't feel well. And he'd be up in his little room, watching, smoking cigarettes and watching old TV.

• 34:16Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 34:16H. Foley?

  You go there and sit with him. It's great.

• 34:18Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 34:19H. Foley?

  Cause you couldn't call your parents and ask for a ride. They'd be like, "What'd you, what'd you leave work early for?" And you say, "Oh, I got, I got cut."

• 34:24Speaker 00

  I got caught eating dinner rolls again, Pop. What? That's the third time this week, Hendry.

• 34:30H. Foley?

  You ain't far off.

• 34:31Speaker 00

  You're going to Arizona.

• 34:32H. Foley?

  Man, they were great. You would've loved their rolls.

• 34:35Speaker 00

  You don't know nothing about me.

• 34:36H. Foley?

  Yeah, I do. Now you're a little carbohydrate freak.

• 34:40Speaker 00

  Hey, easy does.

• 34:41H. Foley?

  I know what you like.

• 34:43Speaker 00

  Um...

• 34:44H. Foley?

  Sour dough boy. There you go.

• 34:46Speaker 00

  Kidby likes a carbohydrate. I'll tell you that much. Um...

• 34:52H. Foley?

  Milky Way bread.

• 34:54Speaker 00

  Nah, well, I don't think I'd like a chocolate bread.

• 34:56H. Foley?

  Yeah, you would. Oh, very likable, don't he? Hello Kevin.

• 35:02Speaker 00

  What do you got? Um...

• 35:04H. Foley?

  Talk to me.

• 35:05Speaker 00

  Let's see.

• 35:05H. Foley?

  Powerball.

• 35:07Speaker 00

  What? This is, I mean, this is a new one for me as, as much of a dirtbag, as much dirtbag behavior as we've covered here. This is from Andrew, "Hey y'all, never had one red. Is it garbage to turn your shower on super hot so it can warm up your bedroom? FYI, I don't leave it on too long, I'm not a wasteful dirtbag, just a cold one."

• 35:28H. Foley?

  What? The bedroom?

• 35:30Speaker 00

  I guess it's, or it says his room, I'm assuming it's his bedroom.

• 35:33H. Foley?

  The shower, I'm all for cranking that up and letting it run for five minutes to warm up the shower and the bathroom. So it's nice when you go in there, I like that.

• 35:45Speaker 00

  Sure, I think five minutes is a long time for the shower, to run the shower.

• 35:48H. Foley?

  Really?

• 35:49Speaker 00

  I think it's a long, I mean, I'm not fucking, I'm not Captain Planet over here.

• 35:54Speaker 00

  But that's five minutes of running-

• 35:56H. Foley?

  These kids are screwed anyway.

• 35:57Speaker 00

  Uh, listen, I'm not, I'm not super, but just five minutes, I'm just, it's a long-

• 36:02H. Foley?

  My shower ain't gonna pull the chips to the Taiwan, alright? I don't know what to tell you. You guys are on your own.

• 36:07Speaker 00

  It could run a drought and run them ashore.

• 36:11H. Foley?

  See, I'm helping out.

• 36:14H. Foley?

  Help me run the shower. Five minutes is what it takes to get the bathroom warmed up. Steam it up a little bit, so that my piggies don't get cold when I go in the shower.

• 36:21Speaker 00

  Yeah, god forbid.

• 36:22H. Foley?

  Or I touch the side of the wall and it's cold. I want to enjoy my shower, exfoliate, refresh, do my stretches.

• 36:29Speaker 00

  Mm-hmm, snap your turtle.

• 36:33Speaker 00

  Snap your turtle.

• 36:36H. Foley?

  Hey, pull my weener?

• 36:37Speaker 00

  Um, yeah, I mean, I get that, I've tried it for cold, I've tried it to lower the temperature when I didn't have air conditioning, so that makes sense that you would do that to heat, because it's a good heat, I mean, like-

• 36:51H. Foley?

  I just don't see how it makes it down the hall, out of the hallway and into the bedroom.

• 36:54Speaker 00

  You're assuming there's a hallway, what if it's right off the bedroom? And he just keeps the door open and it warms his small, what if it's a studio apartment?

• 37:04H. Foley?

  I dig it.

• 37:04Speaker 00

  I don't know, you know what I mean?

• 37:05H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 37:06Speaker 00

  I'm just not applying any, I'm assuming whatever does, it doesn't go down the hallway, bang a left, you know, wrap around the kitchen, then warm up that room. I assume he's closer. Um, I respect it. I think it's, there's nothing worse. I do agree, you gotta warm up the bathroom.

• 37:24H. Foley?

  Thank you.

• 37:25Speaker 00

  You got it. I'm all about that.

• 37:26H. Foley?

  Thank you.

• 37:27Speaker 00

  Um, ah, dude, we got new fucking mats. She buys cheap shit.

• 37:36H. Foley?

  With the white on the bottom? That white rubber on the bottom?

• 37:38Speaker 00

  I don't even know, but they're like too long. Like the fur, not the fur, what's the word? Carpet. Like shag, kind of? Yeah, but it's not even like thick. It's like thin. You know those, you know those visors that have the hair on them? It looks like that hair, you know what I mean? Does that make sense? Dropping, do you know what I'm, yeah. It's, the threads are so thin.

• 38:02H. Foley?

  We had a dude at the show, not, I can't remember what show it was recently, we met him at the meet and greet, he was rocking that look. It was his hair, but he had a visor on.

• 38:09Speaker 00

  I don't think it was.

• 38:10H. Foley?

  I think it was.

• 38:11Speaker 00

  I didn't know. I don't know what that was. I'm not sure.

• 38:15H. Foley?

  Shout out to you.

• 38:15Speaker 00

  Shout out to you. I was so unsure that I didn't make fun of him at the meet and greet about it, because I wasn't sure if it was a real. I wouldn't be, I was gonna be like, are you wearing one of those fucking visors with the hair? But I didn't want it to be his real hair, and I didn't want it to, I didn't know what I wanted out of it.

• 38:29H. Foley?

  I dug it. It was a good look.

• 38:32H. Foley?

  Yeah, but as a carpet, that's, it's like you're stepping on baby hair.

• 38:35Speaker 00

  Dude, and then my, like, this morning, my wife got in before me.

• 38:38H. Foley?

  Nice. I love that.

• 38:39Speaker 00

  Sure, but now to, you get out and it's like stepping in a swan, it's like, we're walking in a marsh, because it, the hair's long to begin with, and then it's wet and it holds that water.

• 38:49H. Foley?

  Someone threw my toes!

• 38:50Speaker 00

  Oh dude, it is icky feet. I hate it. And it's, it's hers, so it's already cold, because it's like, so you get out, I dry my, and then I.

• 39:03Speaker 00

  It's like walking into fucking quicksand, dude. It stinks. It ruins the day. So now I put like my t-shirt or my underwear, whatever I got on that I'm taking off, I lay on top. We gotta get new mats. We're fucking jammed up.

• 39:14H. Foley?

  You stepping out of your underwear?

• 39:16Speaker 00

  Yeah. I do that a lot. You don't do that?

• 39:19H. Foley?

  No.

• 39:20Speaker 00

  Oh, I do that all the time.

• 39:21H. Foley?

  What do you mean?

• 39:22Speaker 00

  To not wet the floor. I'll step on whatever I'm, not like...

• 39:27H. Foley?

  Wearing?

• 39:28Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 39:28H. Foley?

  That I understand.

• 39:29Speaker 00

  Yeah. I'm not putting out a new set of underwear.

• 39:31H. Foley?

  Why don't you just put a towel down? As a makeup bath mat.

• 39:36Speaker 00

  I don't have extra. I ain't got extra. Listen, I barely got a workable bath mat. You think I got extra fucking...

• 39:41H. Foley?

  I'm in the Venmo for $400.

• 39:42Speaker 00

  I ain't got, yeah. What are you talking about? Luke's paying my bills. Um, yeah, dude, it's just, oh, it makes my toes curl. I hate it.

• 39:52H. Foley?

  That's scary. Kim, let's talk about Brunt.

• 39:54Speaker 00

  Shout out to Brunt gang.

• 39:56H. Foley?

  Best work boots in the business. Do yourself a favor. Do a little contracting, do a little landscaping, do a little laboring. We've all been there.

• 40:02Speaker 00

  Even if it's cold weather.

• 40:04H. Foley?

  Get yourself some Brunt's, because a lot of times with work boots, you gotta do, you get comfortable.

• 40:08Speaker 00

  Mm-hmm.

• 40:08H. Foley?

  You get looking good, alright?

• 40:11Speaker 00

  Or functional.

• 40:11H. Foley?

  Or functional. Brunt, you get all that stuff. You don't wanna be the guy showing up on the, uh, on the job site wearing Pumas, looking like an idiot. Get yourself a pair of Brunt's, and I know you're legit.

• 40:21Speaker 00

  Yeah, check out the Marin line, baby. Uh, they are comfortable right out of the box. You don't need eight, six to eight weeks to break them in.

• 40:28H. Foley?

  I like that.

• 40:28Speaker 00

  These things go on, slipping right into butter, keep you covered all day long on the job site, baby. Um, Brunt isn't just about work boots. They offer a full range of high-performance gear built for tough jobs. And listen, we got a lot of guys out there, and gals, guys and gals, with tough jobs. You're working in the elements, you're working in factories, you're doing this, you're doing that, you're in and out of the truck, you're, you're all over the place, you're on your fifteen, sixteen, eighteen hours a day. Brunt's got you covered from heavy-duty work pants to weather-resistant jackets. The chauvin is the most comfortable hoodie you're ever gonna put on. Brunt designs durable, reliable workwear to keep you protective and productive in any condition. Uh, while temps are dropping and the holidays coming up, it's a great time to treat yourself or the hard-working man in your life to real comfort. Skip the throwaway gifts and get them something built to last.

• 41:14Speaker 00

  Brunt workwear. Our listeners get $10 off their entire order with the code GARBAGE at checkout. That's bruntworkwear.com. Use the code GARBAGE. Order today and let them know the boy sent you from Are You Garbage Doing?

• 41:25H. Foley?

  Talk to us. Kim, let's talk about Chime.

• 41:27Speaker 00

  Chime!

• 41:28H. Foley?

  As you know, baby, life comes at you pretty quick.

• 41:31Speaker 00

  You ain't lying, big man.

• 41:32H. Foley?

  Things start adding up.

• 41:33Speaker 00

  Uh huh.

• 41:33H. Foley?

  You know what I'm saying? I wish I could go back and tell my younger self, if you're gonna do a little banking, make sure you save your money, make sure you do it right, watch out for bank fees, all that kinda stuff. I'll tell you what I really wish, I could go back and say, "Hey, I wish I had Chime."

• 41:48Speaker 00

  I know. Listen, if you're out there, this is where Chime comes in. Chime is changing the way people bank. It's hard, listen, it's hard enough to keep a buck as it is, then you got these big corporate banks coming after ya.

• 42:00H. Foley?

  Overdraft fees.

• 42:02Speaker 00

  Overdraft fee, uh, monthly statement, that is, oh, oh, five dollars for this, ten dollars for that, they got their hand in your pocket. Not with Chime. Chime offers the most rewarding fee-free banking, all with no overdraft fees, no monthly fees, no minimum balances. You get 5% cash back on the Chime card in a category of your choice, like gas or groceries, all while building credit through regular, everyday spending. And if you're ever in a pinch, SpotMe lets you overdraft up to $200 fee-free. Look at that, I know, I need that, dog. Uh, right now, you can join the millions that are already banking fee-free with America's number one choice for banking. Head to chime.com/garbage, that's chime.com/garbage. Sign up now, it only takes a few minutes.

• 42:43H. Foley?

  Do it.

• 42:44Speaker 04

  Chime is a fintech, not a bank. Banking services and Chime Card provided by Chime's bank partners. Qualifying direct deposits required. Terms and limits apply. Go to chime.com/disclosures for details.

• 42:55Speaker 00

  Let's see here, uh, this is from Aaron, uh, $10 homie, never had one read, "Are you garbage if you save the tissue paper from gift bags? I understand the bags, but the tissue paper." I got an odd take here. I would say it's more important to save the tissue paper, in my experience, than the bag. Because as a dirtbag who's always buying a gift and/or wrapping the gift super last minute, I always have the bag. I never have the tissue paper.

• 43:31H. Foley?

  And if anybody out there knows.

• 43:32Speaker 00

  I, when you hand a bag with a box in it, and it's just wobbling around, and the sides are sticking out, you look like a fucking jerk off.

• 43:40H. Foley?

  What, you got a gun in here? What the fuck?

• 43:45H. Foley?

  Just a brick of coke?

• 43:46Speaker 00

  Yeah. It looks like you're shoplifting dude. It looks like that should be lined with tin foil on the inside. Which I saw these two broads doing at 59th and Lex one time. It blew, it blew my little... I'd never seen an operation like that. They were switching, because Bloomingdale's and H&M, all right there, 59th and Lex, whatever that is.

• 44:11H. Foley?

  Jackpot.

• 44:12Speaker 00

  Man, they were, I think, because you can hit a bunch of stores and then you're on the subway and there's like, the NQR and the fucking 456 is there. You could be in the fucking Bronx in three minutes. Fucking...

• 44:23H. Foley?

  And I have.

• 44:23Speaker 00

  While the security guard for fucking H&M is looking for you. And they were switching bags. Real quick to a teen, there was like, two girls came down with bags, handed them to someone else, they went that way, they went that way. Gone in the, gone in the wind. Fucking ghosted and I went, god damn, this city's gonna be alright.

• 44:44Speaker 00

  Uh...

• 44:45H. Foley?

  I like it.

• 44:45Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 44:46H. Foley?

  Only problem. That tissue paper...

• 44:51Speaker 00

  Doesn't hold.

• 44:52H. Foley?

  It's not that it doesn't hold. You could have 40 sheets of that. They pack it, it's... Takes up as much space as a loose piece of loosey paper.

• 45:01Speaker 00

  Sure.

• 45:02H. Foley?

  You open that shit up, you're never folding that back nice. Where are you gonna store it?

• 45:06Speaker 00

  I, listen, I don't, I'm, I'm not judging...

• 45:09H. Foley?

  I'm just saying, where are you gonna keep it?

• 45:11Speaker 00

  In the bag. Put the bag on the floor of the closet.

• 45:13H. Foley?

  Oh. I guess you could just leave it in the bag.

• 45:15Speaker 00

  Drop another box in there. You know what's a real bad look that I...

• 45:19H. Foley?

  But isn't that bad to re-gift those bags?

• 45:22Speaker 00

  No, I think those are getting passed around like fucking loose cigarettes in jail.

• 45:25H. Foley?

  I'm just throwing them out.

• 45:27Speaker 00

  That's crazy. I, I've always had the bag and then I gotta hit up Denise, "You got tissue paper?" I don't know, I keep doing that shit.

• 45:35H. Foley?

  I know. Shout out to his new special. Um... I always just get that shit when I get the thing. Before I get to the house.

• 45:44Speaker 00

  I'm not buying the gift bag. I, what your misunderstanding is, I got, I got, I'm in the, I got the gift bag, uh, at the house. And I'm, I'm already behind the eight ball, I gotta be at Denise's for, or my sister's for Christmas in 45 minutes.

• 46:05H. Foley?

  Stop at CVS.

• 46:08Speaker 00

  I ain't got time, it's on the schedule. I don't have it.

• 46:10H. Foley?

  I got schedule, me.

• 46:11Speaker 00

  I got, yeah, what the fuck?

• 46:13H. Foley?

  I'm with you.

• 46:13Speaker 00

  Yeah, in a perfect world, I go buy all this stuff. I'm saying in a world where I can't do that, that stuff. I get that, yeah, I could, but listen, I could just fucking not give a gift as well. I could live in all these worlds. But, I'm li- I don't have time, whatever it is. I don't wanna stop, however it be. I've taken, I've been like, oh, we have three pieces, or whatever.

• 46:35H. Foley?

  You make that work.

• 46:36Speaker 00

  And then you wrapped, you ever wrapped a box? So like, what's sticking out? There's none really in the bag.

• 46:42H. Foley?

  That's all you gotta do. That's a hamburger commercial. You just need the stick out. You just need the paper coming out, right? Yeah. They just want the show.

• 46:52Speaker 00

  I'm saying I don't have, no, you're, I think you're misinterpreting.

• 46:56H. Foley?

  Go ahead.

• 46:57Speaker 00

  Say this is the top of the bag. This is the rim of the bag.

• 47:00H. Foley?

  Yes.

• 47:01Speaker 00

  Right?

• 47:01H. Foley?

  Right.

• 47:02Speaker 00

  The box comes out here.

• 47:04H. Foley?

  Stick it up, out of the bag? You bought it too small of a bag?

• 47:07Speaker 00

  I got, I'm working with what I got here, guy.

• 47:11Speaker 00

  I put it in an Ikea bag. I'm working with what I got.

• 47:15H. Foley?

  What'd you get her?

• 47:16Speaker 00

  What?

• 47:19H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 47:20Speaker 00

  So it's like sticking out a little bit?

• 47:21H. Foley?

  That's a no-no.

• 47:23Speaker 00

  No, that's okay.

• 47:23H. Foley?

  No, that's a no-no.

• 47:25Speaker 00

  Well, listen.

• 47:25H. Foley?

  That's trash.

• 47:27Speaker 00

  Oh, who am I, fucking Saint Nicholas all of a sudden?

• 47:31H. Foley?

  Fucking the box sticking out of the bag?

• 47:33Speaker 00

  Yeah, I'm jammed up.

• 47:34H. Foley?

  So you just put on a thing to cover it up?

• 47:35Speaker 00

  I just, I'll just wrap it. I've just wrapped that.

• 47:41H. Foley?

  So if I look through the top of the bag?

• 47:42Speaker 00

  Yeah, you can, you see it says.

• 47:44H. Foley?

  If I had an overview shot?

• 47:45Speaker 00

  Yeah, which I don't let anybody get.

• 47:49Speaker 00

  You pink that? Yeah. I'm bad at all this stuff. It's last minute.

• 47:54H. Foley?

  Whoever came up with that, though, is a genius and an evil genius. Cause it's so much better to have the bag in the tissue and not have to open a present. And it's so much easier to, it's so much easier to... To put that in than wrap it present.

• 48:09Speaker 00

  Why aren't they doing it together? Why don't, do they have bags with it just on the side already? And then you can just-

• 48:15H. Foley?

  Politics, man.

• 48:16Speaker 03

  With the tissue paper in the bag?

• 48:17Speaker 00

  Like, can it stapled to the bag? They got that?

• 48:19Speaker 03

  So, yeah, I've seen it at like nicer spots.

• 48:22Speaker 00

  Not the spots I'm shopping at, that's what you're saying.

• 48:24Speaker 03

  I'm assuming-

• 48:25Speaker 00

  Oh, a Michaels is a nicer spot?

• 48:26Speaker 03

  Well, like, no, but like those places where they have like gift wrapping and stuff like that.

• 48:30Speaker 00

  Right.

• 48:31Speaker 03

  CVS will sometimes do it.

• 48:32Speaker 00

  Have you ever paid, have you never had anything gift wrapped, have you?

• 48:35H. Foley?

  Yeah, I'm big on that.

• 48:37Speaker 00

  That makes sense.

• 48:37H. Foley?

  I love that. I love that. I think that is so fantastic.

• 48:42Speaker 00

  I get that.

• 48:42H. Foley?

  Let the pros do it.

• 48:43Speaker 00

  Sure.

• 48:44H. Foley?

  They do the zzzzz. That used to blow my head as a kid. Curling the ribbon?

• 48:49Speaker 00

  That's never been in my, that's not in our DNA. That's like not open in mail.

• 48:53H. Foley?

  I don't give a shit.

• 48:54Speaker 00

  I get it, I mean, it makes so much sense.

• 48:56H. Foley?

  I'll give you a million dollars. I'll write you a check for a million.

• 48:58Speaker 00

  But to me also, that's, that's like, uh, waiting in la, I don't know, it was just like, oh, cause I worked at Macy's, they go, "Where's gift wrapping?" I worked on the first one, I go, "Up on the third floor." If you told me that, I'd go, "Third floor? What? No."

• 49:11H. Foley?

  It's never in a good part of the building.

• 49:12Speaker 00

  No, the lights are flickering and shit. It's always in some flex space.

• 49:16H. Foley?

  Yeah, they don't want you there.

• 49:17Speaker 00

  Yeah, no, I'm not doing it.

• 49:18H. Foley?

  Then you turn the corner, there's a sea of people waiting in line.

• 49:20Speaker 00

  Yeah, it's just like, I would just, I'll just do this poorly on my own right before.

• 49:24H. Foley?

  To me, that's more important than the gift. Love a gift wrapping. I love getting flowers and having them wrapped up.

• 49:29Speaker 00

  Mm-hmm. Very nice.

• 49:32H. Foley?

  Give to the guy's wife. I don't know, I know where he lives. I don't know that.

• 49:37Speaker 00

  I don't get it.

• 49:38H. Foley?

  I don't know, for the town.

• 49:40Speaker 00

  Oh, I don't know.

• 49:40H. Foley?

  Trav, cut that.

• 49:43Speaker 00

  This one's great. This is a great name. This is Chicken Pharmaceuticals. That's a homerun, dude. $10 blue collar Bucks County bozo, never have one red.

• 49:53H. Foley?

  Talk to me.

• 49:53Speaker 00

  "Are you garbage of on multiple occasions? You've decompressed after a long day of work with not one, but two homemade root beer floats." I've never thought as an adult to make a root beer float at the house.

• 50:05H. Foley?

  Are you serious?

• 50:07Speaker 00

  Guy, we're living different lives.

• 50:10Speaker 00

  You think about, you make root beer floats at the house?

• 50:13H. Foley?

  Yeah, I have. Not even with root beer. Just soda.

• 50:18Speaker 00

  That's crazy.

• 50:19H. Foley?

  It's just as good with Pepsi. Just as good.

• 50:22Speaker 00

  Yeah, I mean, I don't think it's the root beer that it's...

• 50:25H. Foley?

  Root beer gives it that nice...

• 50:26Speaker 00

  I'm not saying it doesn't, but I think the sugar's doing a lot of the hard, the heavy lifting.

• 50:31H. Foley?

  Cola flavor. You do it anything. You do it with Mountain Dew. You do it with orange soda, Fanta.

• 50:38Speaker 00

  That's wild that you're doing that, or have done that.

• 50:41H. Foley?

  It's not like I'm doing it every day. I'm chipping.

• 50:44Speaker 00

  Hey, don't backpedal now.

• 50:46H. Foley?

  I'm chipping.

• 50:48Speaker 03

  Uh, I never really got the root beer floats.

• 50:51Speaker 00

  I gotta be honest with you. I think I've only had one, one time. I go, this is a shitty version of ice cream and soda.

• 50:57H. Foley?

  You're crazy.

• 50:57Speaker 00

  As a big bite and sip guy.

• 50:59H. Foley?

  That's nuts.

• 50:59Speaker 00

  It stinks.

• 51:00H. Foley?

  Oh my god.

• 51:01Speaker 00

  It stinks, dude.

• 51:03H. Foley?

  The flavor, the getting the ice cream and then a little bit of wet with it. You're nuts. You've lost your goddamn mind. I'll tell you that right now.

• 51:12Speaker 00

  No.

• 51:12H. Foley?

  Yes, you have. You're showing your true colors on this episode.

• 51:16Speaker 00

  It stinks. It's sloppy.

• 51:18H. Foley?

  Crazy.

• 51:19Speaker 00

  You can't slurp it. It just stinks.

• 51:22H. Foley?

  Crazy.

• 51:23Speaker 03

  It's sticky, but not worth it.

• 51:24H. Foley?

  What are you talking? I knew you would put your nose down at it. Would you like a sorbet? Huh?

• 51:30Speaker 00

  Oh, you don't like a sorbet?

• 51:31H. Foley?

  I enjoy it.

• 51:32Speaker 00

  Yeah, so don't try, this is what you do. Listen, if they were that good, they'd be all for them at restaurants. When was the last time they said, oh, you wanna do the tiramisu or the root beer float? Tonight, tonight, tonight we got a Code Red with a chubby hubby floater.

• 51:47H. Foley?

  No, you don't do that. It'd be vanilla. Code Red would be good, though. Be like cherry ice cream.

• 51:54Speaker 03

  The milkshake's so much better, and they usually are doing...

• 51:57Speaker 00

  Why don't they do milk, why don't, why don't you, why can't you go to like a nice Italian restaurant and go, oh, we'll do a chocolate, a Neapolitan milkshake? Why can't you get that? I don't know why I'm screaming at you, like you're the head of dessert for most Italian restaurants. Although you should be.

• 52:12H. Foley?

  Why you can't get a Neapolitan milkshake?

• 52:15Speaker 00

  Why, no.

• 52:16H. Foley?

  You mean vanilla, chocolate, and strawberry? That's Neapolitan.

• 52:19Speaker 00

  Yeah, the why the fuck, yeah, I know that.

• 52:21H. Foley?

  I didn't know.

• 52:22Speaker 00

  What do you mean? You just told me. Yeah, you did. What do you mean you didn't know? You little ass words out of your mouth.

• 52:26H. Foley?

  I didn't know you knew what you were talking about. You fucking whacked out of your mind on drugs, probably.

• 52:33H. Foley?

  Fucking upside down with Venmo.

• 52:36Speaker 00

  You didn't think I knew what Neapolitan is?

• 52:38H. Foley?

  I didn't know.

• 52:39Speaker 00

  That's crazy.

• 52:40H. Foley?

  Plus, it was, it threw me off that you would, A, know what that is. That you wouldn't refer to it as vanilla, chocolate, and strawberry.

• 52:47Speaker 00

  Cause you're a heathen.

• 52:50H. Foley?

  And two.

• 52:51Speaker 00

  It's funnier for comedy to say Neapolitan.

• 52:53H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 52:54Speaker 00

  Yeah, it's word economy. I can't sit there and go, why can't I have a chocolate, vanilla, and strawberry milkshake?

• 52:58H. Foley?

  You would want that for dessert in an Italian restaurant?

• 53:00Speaker 00

  I think it would be nice. Why, why is it not offered?

• 53:05H. Foley?

  Why would it be?

• 53:06Speaker 00

  Cause it's a fucking dessert.

• 53:08H. Foley?

  Yeah, but it's nothing to do with Italy.

• 53:10Speaker 00

  Neapolitan?

• 53:11H. Foley?

  It's just a name.

• 53:13Speaker 00

  An Italian name? What do you mean it's got nothing to do with it? You fucking jerk off.

• 53:17H. Foley?

  It's not like it's Fumoni.

• 53:19Speaker 00

  What?

• 53:20H. Foley?

  They don't eat that shit over there.

• 53:22Speaker 00

  Why, why are you so anti-milkshake after dinner?

• 53:25H. Foley?

  I'm very, I'm very pro-

• 53:27Speaker 00

  That doesn't, that doesn't seem like it.

• 53:29H. Foley?

  A milkshake after dinner?

• 53:30Speaker 00

  Hey, you're making root beer floats at home. I don't think you're one to throw stones.

• 53:34H. Foley?

  I do that before lunch.

• 53:36Speaker 00

  Listen. I don't know why you're pushing back on this. You like a milkshake.

• 53:41H. Foley?

  I, I'm just surprised to hear you say it. I'm sorry. Let me, let me regroup.

• 53:47H. Foley?

  Get a root beer float, me?

• 53:48Speaker 00

  Thank you.

• 53:49H. Foley?

  Alright.

• 53:49Speaker 03

  Neapolitan ice cream originated from the Italian tradition of combining multiple flavors.

• 53:54Speaker 00

  Why the fuck am I listening to you about anything?

• 53:56H. Foley?

  Say it. Multiple flavors.

• 53:58Speaker 03

  Popularized in America, but-

• 54:00Speaker 00

  It's a, it's a from a Italian tradition. Hey, chicken parm ain't fucking Italian either. That's these Guineas over here made that. Try go over, go over fucking Sizzley, try to get chicken parm.

• 54:10H. Foley?

  Couldn't get no sheep.

• 54:13Speaker 00

  Sheep?

• 54:14H. Foley?

  Lamb.

• 54:16Speaker 00

  Chicken parm? Hey.

• 54:18H. Foley?

  I said they started making chicken parm because they couldn't get any sheep.

• 54:21Speaker 00

  Oh, okay, man.

• 54:22H. Foley?

  Couldn't get it upstairs to the apartment.

• 54:26Speaker 00

  I don't think I get it.

• 54:28H. Foley?

  They couldn't, you couldn't bring a sheep up to their small apartment in the Lower East Side of New York to, to cook it and eat it. So they went and started using chicken. Chicken, you can walk up to five, four foot of stairs.

• 54:39Speaker 00

  So you're in your reality. They're buying the whole chicken, taking them up five flights of stairs and killing them in the apartment?

• 54:47H. Foley?

  And that makes a chicken parm?

• 54:48Speaker 00

  This guy, I don't know what the fuck he's talking about. You are cooked.

• 54:52H. Foley?

  That's what they did back then.

• 54:53Speaker 00

  First of all, you don't- I don't, this is crazy. Big man, bug man, anti-milkshake.

• 55:00H. Foley?

  No bug man.

• 55:01Speaker 00

  Anti-milkshake. You don't tell me a nice little one, I mean, you're getting the ice cream, you're doing a tiramisu, you're doing a whatever, the creme brulee, the fucking, so you're doing all the fun stuff. Why can't you have an elevated version of this?

• 55:14H. Foley?

  I, I believe they are out there. I am not-

• 55:17Speaker 00

  We never seen it.

• 55:18H. Foley?

  Listen, listen. I am not. Not.

• 55:22Speaker 00

  You're not pro-milkshake.

• 55:23H. Foley?

  That's, that's, come on. For all you milkshakes out there, I don't believe them. I'm pro-milkshake.

• 55:29Speaker 00

  Not, not from the conversation I'm in at the moment.

• 55:33H. Foley?

  You just hit me with a curveball. That you knew what Neapolitan was. That was a fact, I see group. And I've never once, in my life, seen you have a milkshake. You've seen me have plenty.

• 55:45Speaker 00

  Cause they're not serving them at dinner. I've never seen you have a-

• 55:48H. Foley?

  Some restaurants do.

• 55:49Speaker 00

  Where?

• 55:50H. Foley?

  Better Burger does.

• 55:52Speaker 00

  It's a fucking burger joint.

• 55:54H. Foley?

  Yeah, take that. I'm with you. I'm sure some of these chefs are doing it.

• 55:58Speaker 03

  I could see like a Terese or Carbone throwing this out there. I think this could be the inspiration for them.

• 56:03Speaker 00

  Thank you. You're telling me I can't go to fucking Quality Italian where you can get a chicken parm pizza? And a fucking tiramisu, fucking, uh-

• 56:11H. Foley?

  Cheesecake?

• 56:12Speaker 00

  Cheesecake. Milkshakes completely out of the fucking question?

• 56:15H. Foley?

  No, you're right.

• 56:16Speaker 00

  You're serving me a chicken cutlet, full pizza.

• 56:18H. Foley?

  You're right.

• 56:19Speaker 00

  Thank you.

• 56:20H. Foley?

  You're right.

• 56:21Speaker 00

  Thank you.

• 56:21H. Foley?

  But that doesn't make me anti-milkshake. I love milkshakes. You're anti-Root Beer Float.

• 56:27Speaker 00

  Yeah, that's well documented. Run that back.

• 56:30H. Foley?

  I, I like them both.

• 56:31Speaker 03

  How do you feel about the egg cream?

• 56:33H. Foley?

  It's okay.

• 56:34Speaker 00

  Contains zero egg and cream.

• 56:36H. Foley?

  It's okay. No, it doesn't have cream in it.

• 56:39Speaker 00

  What? Are we in the same conversation?

• 56:41H. Foley?

  It said it has zero, it does have cream in it.

• 56:44Speaker 00

  Does it?

• 56:45H. Foley?

  You said zero egg, zero cream.

• 56:46Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 56:48H. Foley?

  Yeah. I think it's half and half in club soda. Right?

• 56:53Speaker 00

  What are we, in a fucking depression?

• 56:54Speaker 03

  My aunt used to make them. They're so great.

• 56:57H. Foley?

  What? You don't like them?

• 56:58Speaker 03

  Hate them. It's the same thing as Root Beer Float.

• 57:00H. Foley?

  No, it's not!

• 57:01Speaker 03

  Take a lane.

• 57:03H. Foley?

  You know what you can do?

• 57:04Speaker 00

  You know what, you know what, the only time I, I never-

• 57:07H. Foley?

  You can make a milkshake out of a Root Beer Float, if you blend it. You guys might like that.

• 57:12Speaker 00

  No. Give me a milkshake.

• 57:16Speaker 00

  Listen, soda and ice cream don't belong.

• 57:18H. Foley?

  You like root beer, right? Remember the root beer bottles I used to give you?

• 57:21Speaker 00

  You used to give me? Why you luring me into a van? What are you talking about? You used to give me? You ain't never give me nothing. Okay? Okay?

• 57:30H. Foley?

  You ain't never give me nothing?

• 57:33H. Foley?

  What are you, punch drunk?

• 57:36H. Foley?

  Too many left hooks, Rock?

• 57:39H. Foley?

  You ain't never give me nothing.

• 57:41Speaker 00

  It's not bad. Not good, but it wasn't bad.

• 57:43H. Foley?

  It's pretty good.

• 57:47Speaker 00

  Yeah, I like root beer.

• 57:50Speaker 00

  I don't like that zooming. Fucking asshole.

• 57:57Speaker 00

  Listen.

• 57:57H. Foley?

  Please.

• 57:59Speaker 00

  I think somebody out there should try it, that's all I'm saying. If there's an Italian restaurant.

• 58:03H. Foley?

  You're right. Listen, I am.

• 58:04Speaker 00

  Hold on, can I finish? Can I finish my statement? I'm pro, I'm pro milkshake over here. I'm not saying you're anti-milkshake.

• 58:10H. Foley?

  No, thank you.

• 58:10Speaker 00

  But you're not pro-milkshake.

• 58:12H. Foley?

  Thank you.

• 58:14Speaker 00

  This is gonna fucking emotionally bother you for, for weeks, maybe months.

• 58:19H. Foley?

  Cause I love milkshakes. I even like making them at home when they're real runny, with Breyers and regular milk.

• 58:24Speaker 00

  I've never seen you have one, if I'm just saying that.

• 58:29H. Foley?

  Okay, you want me to start with milkshake? Remember, you said it.

• 58:34H. Foley?

  Seven thousand pounds.

• 58:36Speaker 00

  Get a huge one, if I, like, fucking three feet of whipped cream? Which, I don't love the whipped cream. Can we say that?

• 58:42H. Foley?

  I'm with you right there.

• 58:42Speaker 00

  It's just in the way. I like a little dab, a little dab, dude.

• 58:45H. Foley?

  It's in the way.

• 58:46Speaker 00

  I remember the first time I was over a friend's house, they go, "You want hot chocolate?" And we were a Swiss Miss family. Indoor America's choice, but the packets.

• 58:53H. Foley?

  Those families that went the extra mile on that shit, it was cute a little bit, but very non-functional. You would never find Patty Foley doing this.

• 59:01Speaker 00

  No, no, they handed me a mug of Ovaltine, or something that didn't have enough fucking snap to it. And six inches of whipped cream with the cherry. I said, "I don't know who the chef is today, but it ain't Denise, okay? So send his back, clean that off, and give me a fresh one."

• 59:26Speaker 00

  Yeah, none of that. I like, I like the marshmallow. Um, this is even nuts you might put. I like the marshmallows that came in the packet. I didn't like the regular marshmallows.

• 59:36H. Foley?

  Of course.

• 59:36Speaker 00

  Unless I was just eating a marshmallow. Which, I remember putting them in a microwave, a little bit of peanut butter.

• 59:42H. Foley?

  Good.

• 59:44Speaker 00

  You never did that? Woo, man, you never did that?

• 59:47H. Foley?

  Nah. I ate a marshmallow not that long ago. Raw dogged it.

• 59:51Speaker 00

  Yeah, you get the big one?

• 59:52H. Foley?

  Yeah, they were in a bag in the corner.

• 59:54Speaker 00

  Like biting into a Granny Smith? Ain't nothing sweeter, dog. That's fucking nature's apple right there.

• 59:59H. Foley?

  Straight up marshmallows, alright.

• 1:00:00Speaker 00

  Yeah. Um, I don't know what age that was, but big, we found out you could put marshmallows in the microwave and they, they really pop. They blow the fuck up.

• 1:00:13Speaker 00

  And I remember.

• 1:00:14H. Foley?

  That microwave's dangerous.

• 1:00:15Speaker 00

  You might as, dude, you must have, I thought we had fireworks. And we were waiting to light them off till my mom went to bed.

• 1:00:25H. Foley?

  Is that what you did?

• 1:00:26Speaker 00

  What?

• 1:00:26H. Foley?

  You went, so she went to bed so you could cook your marsh-

• 1:00:28Speaker 00

  Oh yeah, we couldn't play with the microwave like that. That was an after hours, that was an after hours ordeal.

• 1:00:34H. Foley?

  It's like you've been during the day. You were housing marshmallows in the microwave at the end of the night?

• 1:00:39Speaker 00

  Yeah, sleepover, we were playing Sega. Had the boys over.

• 1:00:43H. Foley?

  She wouldn't get snacks or something for the boys?

• 1:00:45Speaker 00

  Yeah, no, she did, she did the full game, man. I'm talking Domino's, whatever, pizza.

• 1:00:50H. Foley?

  Off the menu shit.

• 1:00:51Speaker 00

  And then we had the ice cream and I go, wait, I got a half a bag of the big boys.

• 1:00:57H. Foley?

  Upstairs in my room, in my footlocker. When you know who goes to-

• 1:01:03Speaker 00

  Shoved them up my ass. Once Denise goes to bed, I'm sticking these motherfuckers in the microwave.

• 1:01:09H. Foley?

  And we're all gonna have one.

• 1:01:10Speaker 00

  Uh, no, it was just a, I remember being like, when she goes to bed, we're real, cause we saw what the small ones could do. And we said, what the fuck's a big one, the jumbo? Cause those jumbo guys, I don't know when they came out.

• 1:01:26Speaker 00

  But they dropped in our world in the early 90s.

• 1:01:31H. Foley?

  The super big ones.

• 1:01:32Speaker 00

  Yeah, like they're like bigger than golf balls.

• 1:01:35H. Foley?

  I would say, yeah, about that time.

• 1:01:36Speaker 00

  I just, I remember that and they weren't everywhere. It was like, they were like novelty. And at that time, people weren't spending money on nov- we weren't spending money on novelty stuff. So we had a box of, a bag of them and I remember we put about 15 on a paper plate. Dude.

• 1:01:56Speaker 00

  It's like the Stay Puft guy coming to get you.

• 1:02:00Speaker 00

  Proton packs.

• 1:02:02Speaker 00

  Slab a couple of peanut butter on it. No, we were munching, playing Truxon.

• 1:02:09Speaker 00

  My favorite video game of all time.

• 1:02:11H. Foley?

  Truxon?

• 1:02:11Speaker 00

  No one's ever heard of it. Swear to God. I can't find it.

• 1:02:15H. Foley?

  What is it, truck driving?

• 1:02:17Speaker 00

  No, it was this fucking great, it was on Sega. I bought a bunch of games at a garage sale.

• 1:02:23H. Foley?

  A regular Sega?

• 1:02:24Speaker 00

  Yeah, for a couple of bucks. This old guy was selling it.

• 1:02:27H. Foley?

  You played regular Sega? What's a regular Sega to you?

• 1:02:30Speaker 00

  It might have been Sega Genesis, yeah.

• 1:02:34H. Foley?

  Yeah, I guess that makes sense.

• 1:02:36Speaker 00

  Yeah, when did?

• 1:02:36H. Foley?

  Late 80s, early 90s?

• 1:02:39Speaker 00

  This would have been 92? Six, seven, eight, not yet. 92, Sega Genesis.

• 1:02:46H. Foley?

  It's good to know that we crossed, we cross over at least that much. You know?

• 1:02:53Speaker 00

  I mean, you were 16 playing Sega Genesis then?

• 1:02:56H. Foley?

  I didn't have one.

• 1:02:56Speaker 00

  Okay, so maybe we didn't cross over.

• 1:02:58H. Foley?

  Well, it was around. My other friends had it.

• 1:03:01Speaker 00

  So was fucking Gorbachev. He was around.

• 1:03:05H. Foley?

  I had a regular Sega. Got a regular Sega in like 1984 or 85, I don't know, whenever it came out.

• 1:03:10Speaker 00

  That's pre-me, dog.

• 1:03:12H. Foley?

  It's crazy. You weren't even born yet. I was already fucking up.

• 1:03:16Speaker 00

  Sure.

• 1:03:16H. Foley?

  That was the year we opened all the Christmas presents. The guy yelled that.

• 1:03:20Speaker 00

  That was your first console?

• 1:03:22H. Foley?

  Yeah. No, we didn't have Atari when I was younger. The original Atari.

• 1:03:28Speaker 00

  Yeah, we did, uh, we had Super Nintendo. That was more my brother. I couldn't figure that out. I was like my, I was like four or five. I remember them. I'm like, I can't figure this out.

• 1:03:38Speaker 00

  And, uh,

• 1:03:38H. Foley?

  I'm gonna take the talk for a walk.

• 1:03:39Speaker 00

  Yeah, I remember sitting in the room and him and his boys were playing. I'm going, like, there's no,

• 1:03:43H. Foley?

  I, that's the point that I-

• 1:03:44Speaker 00

  I can't, I can't wrap my head around this.

• 1:03:46H. Foley?

  I couldn't do that. I always had a problem with that. I couldn't get into the game culture like that because you watching somebody else who played it better, and you'd be sitting there and then you'd play for two seconds and get kicked out.

• 1:03:59Speaker 00

  Also, my thing, I didn't like, I didn't super enjoy playing by myself. So, we would all play together, right? We'd play GoldenEye all together. That was big. It's on 64.

• 1:04:13H. Foley?

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:04:13Speaker 00

  Um, we'd play GoldenEye all together and then I'd go home and not play video games because it wasn't fun to play by yourself, but all my boys would play by themselves and get super fucking good. And then two weeks later, we'd all be hanging out again, playing, and I'm getting fucking-

• 1:04:28H. Foley?

  You're four years old again.

• 1:04:29Speaker 00

  I'm getting murked. Left, you know, I ain't got a gun. And then they'd go, let's play, you could play just in 007-

• 1:04:35H. Foley?

  He's a big fat Asian guy in the hat?

• 1:04:37Speaker 00

  You could play, uh, just slaps only. Or no guns. You just karate chop each other.

• 1:04:44H. Foley?

  Oh, it was a fighting game?

• 1:04:46Speaker 00

  007, well, you could play each other. You'd run around the fucking, it was like the first Halo, kind of.

• 1:04:50H. Foley?

  Oh, I didn't know that.

• 1:04:51Speaker 00

  Like, that first, like, open, I don't know, open, it was a map, and you guys would run around and shoot each other.

• 1:04:55H. Foley?

  Huh.

• 1:04:57Speaker 00

  And they would, that was the first time I'm like, you guys are memorizing the maps? I was just running and gunning, you know what I mean? Fucking point and shoot.

• 1:05:04H. Foley?

  You got a map question printed on your hand?

• 1:05:06Speaker 00

  Uh, and, uh, they would play slaps only, and that's embarrassing. Just some guy coming at you, doing just a fucking set of hands, and he's above you, because it would split the screen, and he's above you, and you're just whacking you, and you're- Suck, suck.

• 1:05:21H. Foley?

  Stink.

• 1:05:22Speaker 00

  Couldn't even, I couldn't even shoot a fair one with you, that's how bad I am. And if I get beat up.

• 1:05:26H. Foley?

  Call me yet.

• 1:05:27Speaker 00

  Fucking shoot.

• 1:05:28H. Foley?

  Come at me like a man.

• 1:05:28Speaker 00

  Shooting a fair. Yeah, you're lucky you got that gun. Drops the gun and whoops my ass.

• 1:05:33H. Foley?

  Fucking dirtball with your martinis and your fucking Euro broads.

• 1:05:37Speaker 00

  Fuck yourself. Get me a beer and fucking shoot a fair one in the parking lot. Goes outside, kicks my ass. Uh, but we gotta wrap it up, gang.

• 1:05:45H. Foley?

  Ah, gang, we love you to death.

• 1:05:47Speaker 00

  Uh huh.

• 1:05:47H. Foley?

  Get tickets for that Philly show.

• 1:05:49Speaker 00

  Uh huh, and all shows are on sale right now, and guys, listen, we're playing, um, well, this tour's a little different. We're doing weekends at clubs in a handful of, handful of cities, so get those tickets.

• 1:05:57H. Foley?

  It'll be fun.

• 1:05:57Speaker 00

  They're going fucking quick. Uh, we love ya, yeah.

• 1:05:59H. Foley?

  Love you, gang. See you next week. Peace.