Pod Insights Wolf & Owl with Romesh Ranganathan and Tom Davis Home Alone, Gordon Ramsay & Making Friends About this episode Is it harder to make friends after 40?
On this week’s episode of Wolf & Owl, Rom and Tom tackle one of life’s trickier questions as they dish out advice on making new mates as an adult and why it can be harder after you hit 40.
There’s also a Home Alone deep dive, a surprising switch up from Tom on his Gordon Ramsay opinion, a debate about Itchy And Scratchy and inevitably, one of Tom’s most revolting stories yet.
As always, the boys are answering your emails, oversharing where absolutely nobody asked them to and some terrible American accents from Tom.
A Ranga Bee Production in partnership with Platform Media.
00:00 Intro
00:56 Tom’s American accent
3:30 On Home Alone
4:52 Itchy & Scratchy vs Tom & Jerry
7:27 Tom’s vulgar poo story
9:16 An email from you
11:50 Tom goes backtracks on Gordon Ramsey
16:26 Advice on making friends
22:05 Outro
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Transcript 0:15 Speaker 00 Welcome to the Wolf and I podcast.
0:17 Speaker 01 Extra special.
0:18 Speaker 00 Email special.
0:20 Speaker 01 The correspondence episodes, I've been told to call them.
0:23 Speaker 00 Yeah, correspondence episodes, where you correspond to us at [email protected] and.
0:28 Speaker 01 Correspond back, baby, that's what we're here for.
0:29 Speaker 00 So.
0:30 Speaker 01 It's a correspondence life.
0:32 Speaker 00 That's the correspondence life.
0:36 Speaker 00 Right. Correspond this.
0:39 Speaker 00 Oh, yeah, you like correspondence? Oh, you got it. Have you ever appeared anything as an American?
0:47 Speaker 01 No.
0:48 Speaker 00 Okay.
0:49 Speaker 01 I for so long wanted to be an American, like a schoolboy, like Dawson. I was obsessed with Dawson's Creek for too long.
0:56 Speaker 00 Do you want to read any of these emails?
0:57 Speaker 01 Yeah, I'm quite happy with it.
0:58 Speaker 00 Do you want to do it in an American accent?
0:59 Speaker 01 Okay. Anxious Axolotl, Axolotl here. Before Christmas, Tom mentioned it played on his mind during Home Alone. They made fun of Buzz's girlfriend, who he was worried about. And God, I've over here has missed out.
1:14 Speaker 00 It's got a bit Shawshank Redemption.
1:16 Speaker 01 Yeah, yeah.
1:17 Speaker 00 Who he was. Do you want to start again? First of all, it's Axolotl.
1:20 Speaker 01 Okay, excellent. Do you want me to do it more Dawson?
1:23 Speaker 00 Yeah, go on.
1:24 Speaker 01 Okay, bouncy, okay.
1:27 Speaker 01 Anxious Axolotl here.
1:29 Speaker 00 Axolotl.
1:30 Speaker 01 Before Christmas, Tom mentioned it played on his mind that during Home Alone, they made fun of Buzz's girlfriend, who he was worried was a real person. They used to get a cheap laugh. Just wanted.
1:42 Speaker 00 Can I just stop you there? It's fine what you're doing, but I don't, you've put so much in that. I don't know if people need a bit of catching up on what we're talking about here.
1:51 Speaker 01 No, do it after.
1:52 Speaker 00 Okay, fine.
1:53 Speaker 01 Let's do it about after, okay?
1:54 Speaker 00 It's just that he's about, Axolotl is about to reveal the, the ending of this. So I'm trying to set up a bit of tension.
2:00 Speaker 01 Okay, a bit of tension.
2:01 Speaker 00 So we talked about Home Alone.
2:05 Speaker 00 And Macaulay Culkin, what's his kid's name, Kevin?
2:07 Speaker 01 Kevin McAllister.
2:08 Speaker 00 Yeah, Kevin McAllister takes a piss out of Buzz's girlfriend.
2:12 Speaker 01 Yeah.
2:12 Speaker 00 And says, woof.
2:14 Speaker 01 Woof, yeah.
2:15 Speaker 00 Yeah. And then we, you expressed concern.
2:17 Speaker 01 Yep.
2:18 Speaker 00 And I seconded that.
2:19 Speaker 01 Yep.
2:20 Speaker 00 That there was a little girl out there who was forever going to be canonized.
2:23 Speaker 01 Yep.
2:24 Speaker 00 As.
2:24 Speaker 01 And, and would never be able to get the joy from Home Alone, that Home Alone brings so many.
2:28 Speaker 00 There you go. So that's what he's referring to, that's all.
2:30 Speaker 01 Just wanna.
2:31 Speaker 00 Or she.
2:32 Speaker 01 Yeah. Just wanna put his mind at ease. It's actually documented, it was a member of the crew's son in a wig. Hope this helps, Tom. And it goes to show just what a legend John Hughes was.
2:44 Speaker 00 Well, by the way, by the way.
2:45 Speaker 01 Well, yeah. Love the show and keep doing what you're doing, guys. Ha. I'm a recent convert at Walf for now, and for a long time I felt I was cheating on parenting hell. But now managed to dual parent the two shows guilt free. It's me, it's Richard, your new friend.
3:02 Speaker 00 Um, so you think Americans pronounce it wolf?
3:04 Speaker 01 Wolf, walf, walf, walf, the walf for now.
3:08 Speaker 00 It's not walf, is it?
3:09 Speaker 01 Yeah, it depends which bit of America you're from.
3:11 Speaker 00 Which bit of America they're saying wolf?
3:12 Speaker 01 Oh, by the way, my, I, I just literally think of a.
3:15 Speaker 00 Wolf, isn't it? Wolf.
3:16 Speaker 01 I think of a person rather than the actual.
3:19 Speaker 00 Which person was that?
3:20 Speaker 01 What, when I was doing that accent?
3:21 Speaker 00 Yeah.
3:21 Speaker 01 Uh, sort of middle management guy.
3:24 Speaker 00 So not actually a, not.
3:25 Speaker 01 No, no, not, but I can't do impressions.
3:26 Speaker 00 Wolf.
3:27 Speaker 01 Wolf.
3:27 Speaker 00 Wolf.
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4:58 Speaker 01 He was a wolf, he was an owl.
5:00 Speaker 00 Do you think it's better that it was a boy? Now that boy is forever in that thing.
5:05 Speaker 01 No, but I think it was probably done as a sort of, there was, there was a bit of a jovial way of doing it. I mean, it's different things. Some people say it was the set designer's kid.
5:14 Speaker 00 Some people say it's the director's kid.
5:17 Speaker 01 But I think it's really, because a lot of people got in touch about that. And I, it put my mind at ease.
5:23 Speaker 00 Because you're worried, weren't you?
5:24 Speaker 01 Terribly so. Because it's a really fun film. Grace, by the way, has just mastered how to do the, ah, she does the whole thing.
5:31 Speaker 00 Yeah, that's good.
5:32 Speaker 01 But yeah, it's very cute.
5:33 Speaker 00 You say the whole thing, that's just.
5:35 Speaker 01 No, no, washing and.
5:36 Speaker 00 Oh, she does the washes.
5:37 Speaker 01 Yeah, yeah, yeah. She does the whole thing of going, I put da-da-da-da under my arms and. Ah, yeah, yeah, it's very cute, yeah.
5:47 Speaker 00 Do you think you could make that film now?
5:49 Speaker 01 Well, Home Alone, why not?
5:51 Speaker 00 Well, I just think, you know.
5:52 Speaker 01 They've made a TV series of it.
5:53 Speaker 00 Yeah, but it's not.
5:54 Speaker 01 I will say, since she's watched that, she's become a lot more casual with her violence.
5:58 Speaker 00 Well, that's exactly the point I was gonna make.
6:00 Speaker 01 A lot of kicking, when I fell down the stairs, she found it hilarious.
6:04 Speaker 00 Well, didn't she like swing a bowling ball into your face from the top of the stairs?
6:08 Speaker 01 Let's try the micro machines on the stairs. But she found it, it took her a while for her not to.
6:13 Speaker 00 I mean, a lot of it, it's very carto, you know, like, because you know in Tom and Jerry, they always just have a go at Tom and Jerry. That's what Itchy and Scratchy took the piss out of. Because like, it's like violence.
6:22 Speaker 01 What happened to Itchy and Scratchy? They had it all.
6:23 Speaker 00 What do you mean?
6:24 Speaker 01 They had it all, didn't they?
6:25 Speaker 00 What are you talking about?
6:26 Speaker 01 In The Simpsons, Itchy and Scratchy.
6:28 Speaker 00 What do you mean they had it all?
6:29 Speaker 01 Well, they smashed it, they were smashing it. They could have had a spin-off. It was so close for them. You could have tasted it. At one point, Itchy and Scratchy, I'd say almost surpassed The Simpsons.
6:38 Speaker 00 I'm pretty sure they did episodes of Itchy and Scratchy's spin-offs.
6:41 Speaker 01 Really?
6:41 Speaker 00 Almost certainly, yeah.
6:42 Speaker 01 I don't know.
6:42 Speaker 00 But you don't want to just watch Itchy and Scratchy the whole time, do you?
6:46 Speaker 01 You used to think they were genius. They were so surreal and just, yeah.
6:49 Speaker 00 It wasn't that, I mean, it was, it was just Tom and Jerry turned up to turn.
6:52 Speaker 01 There was, yeah, there was an element to it that had a little bit of laugh in sort of breaking the fourth wall going, hey, you're a part of this too, friend. Whereas Tommy, Tom and Jerry's felt very about them and their relationship.
7:02 Speaker 00 Itchy Scratchy's about them as well.
7:04 Speaker 01 Yeah, yeah, but it felt that there was more of a door open to saying, come in, we're friends. Whereas Tom and Jerry felt like.
7:09 Speaker 00 Why? Why? No, no, no, I'm not gonna let you get away with this. How did they do that?
7:13 Speaker 01 Just because they were a bit more working.
7:14 Speaker 00 What was it? When, when Scratchy stuck a missile up Itchin's arse?
7:17 Speaker 01 No, but it was, it was a bit more sort of tongue in cheek.
7:19 Speaker 00 Or when he staple gunned his tongue to a plank of wood.
7:21 Speaker 01 It was a bit more tongue in cheek. I'd have to sit and watch an episode together. And, and then I'd go, I'd say, there. And you'd go, oh, I see, yeah, that's good.
7:28 Speaker 00 Itchy Scratchy is just Tom and Jerry.
7:30 Speaker 01 It's not. There's so much, there's so much more going on.
7:32 Speaker 00 No, but it, it, it's just, the whole, the whole, Itchy Scratchy was a statement about Tom and Jerry.
7:37 Speaker 01 Yeah, it was, but then it's a part even Tom and Jerry.
7:40 Speaker 00 In what way?
7:41 Speaker 01 It's became bigger and better and more.
7:43 Speaker 00 Itchy Scratchy, listen.
7:44 Speaker 01 By the way, there's Itchy Scratchy world now, at the Simpsons world.
7:47 Speaker 00 Yeah, I know that. It's within the Simpsons world, yeah.
7:50 Speaker 01 Yeah, I know, yeah, but they've got, Tom and Jerry have got nothing now. It's sad, but it's like.
7:53 Speaker 00 That's probably an age thing, isn't it? Time thing.
7:55 Speaker 01 Yeah. Think of.
7:57 Speaker 00 You know, there's lots of people, I don't know what our demographic is for this podcast. Lots of people going, who are these, who the fuck are they talking about?
8:03 Speaker 01 Do you know, every time.
8:03 Speaker 00 Thomas!
8:05 Speaker 01 When, uh.
8:05 Speaker 00 You know who that is?
8:06 Speaker 01 Yeah, yeah, that's, um, Thomas's owner. Or, yeah, yeah.
8:12 Speaker 00 Why'd you get so nervous about that?
8:14 Speaker 01 No, I was just like.
8:14 Speaker 00 Okay, you meant Thomas's owner, but then you reacted like you thought that might get you cancelled.
8:17 Speaker 01 Well, there's, no, there, there's an element, is that his owner?
8:20 Speaker 00 Yeah.
8:21 Speaker 01 Or is it, do you know what I mean? Is it just someone having a go at a cat who doesn't live there? Because she's not very like, she never really strokes him. She's always shouting at him. Do you know what I mean? It's not like a love affair.
8:28 Speaker 00 I think if you saw a cat in your house, the first thing I wouldn't do is give it a name.
8:35 Speaker 01 No, but if you knew it and it lived like three doors down.
8:37 Speaker 00 Right.
8:37 Speaker 01 We have a cat that comes to our garden all the time looking to make friends with my cat.
8:41 Speaker 00 Also, the other, the other thing is.
8:42 Speaker 01 By the way, there's an awful thing at the moment. My cat's trying to, I think, try, like, he tries to jump in the toilet after, like, all the time. I don't know what's going on, whether he's just.
8:50 Speaker 00 Why do you keep putting your shits in a little string?
8:54 Speaker 01 My butt is.
8:57 Speaker 01 Can I just say, by the way, I did a gig the other night with Gratz and Dinesh, right? And you could also.
9:02 Speaker 00 One of these guys is.
9:03 Speaker 01 No, I did a poo that was so vulgar that that the guy running the gig literally had to walk out and leave the room. And it was not in that I literally drifted in and Din was, Dinesh is the so, if that was you, you'd rinse me. You're terrible. Din's so polite, but I bought them both pizza and neither of them could eat the pizza. It was so bad. We were just all sat there and I was like, I'm so sorry. And Din was like, no, it's really not that bad. And I was like, Din, it's disgusting. It's, it's completely taken over. He was like, I can't really smell it. And Gratz was just like, like head against the wall. It's fuck, it was one of those, it was awful.
9:39 Speaker 00 I am, I, uh, when I did Miss Adventure, Roma Shangalan in the Arctic, the guy that I was with, Johnny Isalak.
9:46 Speaker 01 Yeah.
9:47 Speaker 00 Isalak, sorry. He was.
9:48 Speaker 01 Cool name, by the way. He could do anything in life.
9:50 Speaker 00 He was like my co-host.
9:51 Speaker 01 Right.
9:52 Speaker 00 And he only ate meat exclusively because he's just hunting and he didn't really have vegetables. Anyway, we were getting a flight out of the Canadian Arctic.
10:01 Speaker 01 Yeah.
10:02 Speaker 00 And, um, he did a fart. Bearing in mind, it's, you know, I'm not talking about Heathrow. It's like a small, little terminal hub. He did a fart that was so toxic, he emptied the terminal.
10:16 Speaker 01 What?
10:17 Speaker 00 Yeah. Everybody left the building.
10:19 Speaker 01 Oh my god.
10:20 Speaker 00 Yeah. I mean, I'm talking like forty, fifty people, but still.
10:23 Speaker 01 Did he reference it or?
10:25 Speaker 00 He was proud.
10:26 Speaker 01 Wow.
10:27 Speaker 00 I was about to say, he didn't give a shit, but I imagine he did shortly after that based on that smell, but.
10:31 Speaker 01 Johnny Isak, that's a cool name.
10:33 Speaker 00 Yeah. He was an actor as well. He's a great guy.
10:35 Speaker 01 That's, yeah.
10:35 Speaker 00 Um, anyway, thank you so much for clearing up for us. That's really, that's great. That's the kind of stuff we love on the podcast, isn't it?
10:41 Speaker 01 Yeah, yeah.
10:42 Speaker 00 Those kind of emails.
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11:46 Speaker 01 You should read this one.
11:47 Speaker 00 Okay, uh, accent?
11:49 Speaker 01 Um, read it like you are a cheeky little scamp who's just found out how electricity works for the first time.
11:59 Speaker 00 I mean, that's a very specific fucking direction.
12:02 Speaker 01 It's easy. Come on.
12:13 Speaker 00 Just, bloody hell, just listen to Tom's dismantling of Gordon and I'd watch out. But he's on the same list as Jamie Oliver. Wow, wow. You know, he's been awarded 17 Michelin Stars in his time and currently holds eight. Oh dear, oh dear.
12:32 Speaker 01 That's actually insane. That's really good. That was, yeah, you literally conveyed exactly.
12:38 Speaker 00 Yeah, anyway.
12:39 Speaker 01 It's actually meant to be quite a threatening email, by the way.
12:41 Speaker 00 Yeah, I mean, the truth is, you went in too fitted on Gordon Ramsay.
12:45 Speaker 01 Yeah, yeah.
12:47 Speaker 00 I would, I would go as far as to say, if you were that way inclined, three footed. I mean, you, you called him the Jake Paul of cooking.
12:55 Speaker 01 Yeah.
12:56 Speaker 00 You said that you could go toe to toe with him in a cook-off.
12:59 Speaker 01 Yeah.
13:00 Speaker 00 You implied it, certainly. Yeah?
13:02 Speaker 01 Yeah.
13:02 Speaker 00 You said that the only reason he's got anywhere is because of his personality. That is basically the gist of what you said.
13:08 Speaker 01 Right, can I just say, I want to clear up a few things. Like, the Jake Paul thing,
13:13 Speaker 01 what I meant by that is, there's, he's got an attitude about him.
13:16 Speaker 00 Don't start repi-, don't, don't compound the crime by repeating all of the things he's said again.
13:21 Speaker 01 But when Catherine listened to this back, she said, you're basically the Jake Paul in the situation, Tom.
13:26 Speaker 00 Right.
13:26 Speaker 01 And he's like the Tyson Fury or the Anthony Joshua.
13:30 Speaker 00 Yeah, that makes, I get that analogy, yeah.
13:31 Speaker 01 Yeah, and you're the, you're bad mouthing someone who's actually really, really good. I will say. Chefin wise and cook, I don't like, I obviously he's one of the best ever, right? I will say.
13:42 Speaker 00 You didn't say any of this, by the way, the previous time. Now he's, I'm suddenly he's the best ever.
13:46 Speaker 01 He's a very good chef.
13:47 Speaker 00 Because your arse has gone a little bit, because you're nervous, because you publicly, you're on a public forum. You've gone in on him.
13:53 Speaker 01 Yeah, but I will say this, I would stand, I would go toe to toe with him and see what happens.
13:58 Speaker 00 I, I, I, I wanna talk to you a little bit about the psychology of this, right? Because I, I want you to imagine.
14:04 Speaker 01 Yeah.
14:05 Speaker 00 You're listening to a podcast.
14:06 Speaker 01 Yeah.
14:07 Speaker 00 And they start ripping into your acting or your stand up.
14:09 Speaker 01 Which has happened.
14:11 Speaker 00 On a podcast?
14:12 Speaker 01 I don't know about a podcast, but I'm aware of conversations.
14:14 Speaker 00 Yeah, obviously that happens, obviously, obviously you don't need to stipulate that it happens, obviously it happens in public, in chats.
14:19 Speaker 01 Can I just say, by the way, this is more about me than Gordon Ramsay. I think Gordon Ramsay is really good at what he does.
14:24 Speaker 00 This is such a fucking one eighty. You said, because he shouts a bit and swears a lot, that's where he's got to, where he's got to.
14:30 Speaker 01 No, no, no, no, no, no, no. As a personality, are you telling me that when, if you're a, like, if you're a channel, a broadcaster, a streamer, looking for someone to host a TV show as a chef? That when you see Gordon Ramsay, you go, this is gold because of him. That was not meant to be like a disparaging, not horrible remark. My thing was, he's got.
14:50 Speaker 00 You've gone right round the house.
14:52 Speaker 01 No, no, no, no. No, no, but when you watch him, the shouting, no, the shouting, the attitude, the swearing, all of those things, right? Don't get me wrong, I stand by what I said, but that, a lot of that added to the illusion of the, the whole sort of brand that became Gordon Ramsay.
15:08 Speaker 00 Illusion?
15:09 Speaker 01 What do you mean? I think he's quite a nice chap in real life, by the way. If you meet him, he's one of the most gentle, loving.
15:13 Speaker 00 So not only can he not cook, the personality is fake as well.
15:17 Speaker 01 No, no, he's a lovely man.
15:18 Speaker 00 He's not authentic.
15:19 Speaker 01 No, I think he's real. When he's in the ki-, when he's outside the kitchen, he's like a fighter. Inside the, inside the kitchen, he's a killer outside of it. He's a lovely, gentle man. Like, I think he's a beautiful human being, but what I'm saying to you.
15:31 Speaker 00 Wow. You have fucking folded on this so pathetically.
15:37 Speaker 01 No, I'm just saying to you, but I'd still go toe to toe, and I still think.
15:41 Speaker 00 Toe to toe with what? In what?
15:42 Speaker 01 Like, I don't know, cooking a big omelette or something.
15:44 Speaker 00 An omelette. You think, Tom.
15:47 Speaker 01 Actually, not an omelette, I'm not very good at omelettes.
15:49 Speaker 00 Okay, fine. Name something.
15:50 Speaker 01 Okay, well, I could go toe, uh.
15:53 Speaker 00 That you're really good at making.
15:54 Speaker 01 Scrambled egg?
15:55 Speaker 00 Fuck off, Tom.
15:57 Speaker 01 Souffle?
15:58 Speaker 00 You think you could do a better souffle than Gordon Ramsay?
16:00 Speaker 01 Given a little bit of practice.
16:02 Speaker 00 Currently holds eight Michelin stars. Given it, direct quote from 10 seconds ago, given a bit of practice.
16:10 Speaker 01 I think he's probably quite rusty as well. He's like an old champion, he's got to come out.
16:15 Speaker 00 Tom, can I tell you this? Gordon Ramsay could be in a car accident. He's in a coma for nine years. They bring him around with some smelling salts and you have spent the interim exclusively making souffles.
16:29 Speaker 01 Right, yeah, yeah.
16:30 Speaker 00 They wheel him out of the hospital, they get him straight into the kitchen, his souffle will still be better than yours.
16:35 Speaker 01 Mate, I'm just telling you, well, you know, have you ever had one of my souffles? You wouldn't even eat them anyway, they've got eggs and stuff in them, right, I think.
16:41 Speaker 00 Have you made a souffle? I think, have you made a souffle?
16:43 Speaker 01 I've made a souffle.
16:44 Speaker 00 Which souffle did you make?
16:45 Speaker 01 I've made a cheese, a three cheese souffle.
16:47 Speaker 00 Okay, great.
16:48 Speaker 01 Right, I'm just saying to you now, right, I, my thing is, a lot of it is about the branding. It's, it's all of the stuff around it, that's what made him this absolute legend that we all adore, right?
17:00 Speaker 00 I, I, I, I don't know what I'm more appalled by, your initial comments or this absolute ring licking. Do, do you know what? I'll tell you what you could kick, cook with right now, his arsehole, as squeaky clean as it is.
17:18 Speaker 01 No, I, I'm just saying that that, but also.
17:20 Speaker 00 Do you think he can cook though?
17:21 Speaker 01 Yeah.
17:21 Speaker 00 Uh, to what level?
17:22 Speaker 01 No, he's one of the, he's a very good cook, he's a very good chef, he's, he's a, like, decent chef, very good chef.
17:28 Speaker 00 Decent chef?
17:29 Speaker 01 Well, I will say, I don't think it's an insult comparing him to Jamie Oliver.
17:32 Speaker 00 No, well, I mean, that did cause some, some good.
17:34 Speaker 01 Yeah, can I just, what? Yeah, but I think, like, Jamie Oliver's a really. Jamie Oliver, by the way, young upstart, he's a bit like the kid out of Ratatouille, do you know what I mean?
17:41 Speaker 00 Well, he's 50 now, and how old is he?
17:44 Speaker 00 How old's Jamie Oliver?
17:46 Speaker 01 No, I'm just saying to you, he, his, Jamie Oliver's rise to fame is, is a bit like the kid from Ratatouille.
17:51 Speaker 00 He's 50 years old.
17:52 Speaker 01 Yeah, but when he was a youngster.
17:53 Speaker 00 Right.
17:54 Speaker 01 He was like a pot cleaner and all that, and he learned how to use, learn the ropes.
17:57 Speaker 00 Yeah.
17:57 Speaker 01 He's basically, by the way, I think he inspired the story of Ratatouille, don't I? Definitely, not because of the rat bit, but anyone could cook.
18:04 Speaker 00 Jamie Oliver inspired Ratatouille.
18:08 Speaker 01 Maybe Google that, because I actually think there's an element of.
18:10 Speaker 00 What's happened here is, you can't stomach it with Gordon Ramsay.
18:15 Speaker 01 I love Jamie Oliver.
18:17 Speaker 00 Jamie Oliver's great.
18:18 Speaker 01 Yeah, he's a sweetheart.
18:19 Speaker 00 As is Gordon Ramsay. They're both excellent chefs.
18:21 Speaker 01 Exactly, exactly. Why, but so why is the insult me saying that Jamie Oliver's as good as Gordon Ramsay?
18:27 Speaker 00 That I don't understand. But I think because Gordon Ramsay's achieved more.
18:31 Speaker 01 Yeah, but Jamie Oliver's such a sweet, sweet guy.
18:33 Speaker 00 Yeah.
18:34 Speaker 01 And they both are.
18:34 Speaker 00 Yeah.
18:35 Speaker 01 So what I'm saying is, it's like, I don't know, you turn around, like, an insult being thrown at me about, oh, you're, you know, this comedian, you're, anyone who is doing professional comedy is good at what they do, right? I don't know, I don't stand by that.
18:48 Speaker 00 No.
18:51 Speaker 00 Uh, anyway, thank you so much for your email.
18:56 Speaker 01 I will remain anonymous if that's okay. I turned forty last year and my amazing wife wanted to throw me a birthday party to celebrate. The idea of this kept me awake at nights for a while. Not the so, not the social anxiety of the party itself, but the realisation that I don't have any friends to invite to it. I have a lot of family that would come and see me, uh, and we have a couple of friends, all from her side of the fence, but no one that would just be my friend. No one I keep in contact with. While I'm happy with my life occasionally, I think it would be nice to be able to message a mate and go for a pint and a chat in chat shit for a few hours. I'm not sure you can make new friends at post forty. Should I be embarrassed not to have those friends? And who do you, and how do you change it?
19:37 Speaker 01 I'm not a weirdo or anything. People tend to like me, just apparently not enough to sustain ongoing contact. Any help much appreciated. Love the pod and the manager electorates. Keep up the good work. By the way, yeah.
19:48 Speaker 00 Email's been included.
19:51 Speaker 01 Well, I'm glad that that was in there because Manjul really needs a shot in the arm.
19:53 Speaker 00 Is it really? What's going on?
19:55 Speaker 01 I'm really suffering at the moment.
19:56 Speaker 00 What, what's going on?
19:57 Speaker 01 Well, we don't know what to do, how to push it more. I mean, this guy's actually, I mean, I feel like we should deal with the pressing.
20:02 Speaker 00 But you're not wearing any Manjul merch now, which you've got the opportunity missed.
20:05 Speaker 01 Yeah, yeah, no, no. I should, yeah, I, we should actually probably start wearing more, and like having a Manjul bottle here. Really upping the, the overlap sort of vibe of what they do with Huell. Uh, but yeah, anyway, let's, let's, let's, let's, by the way, you should start this. Because I usually start when I read them, so.
20:22 Speaker 00 Oh, yeah, okay. Uh, thank you so much for your message. Um.
20:28 Speaker 00 I I I feels like you're beating yourself up about not having anybody that you're like friends with or go for a party with. I think that's a pretty common thing. So
20:37 Speaker 01 Yeah.
20:38 Speaker 00 I I think that, you know, a lot of the time, I think about the number of people you talk to on a day to day basis.
20:44 Speaker 01 Yeah.
20:44 Speaker 00 But then when actually, when you drill that down to who could you actually phone right now to go for a party with and, you know, that that those those type of people are hard to come by. And particularly when you get older, everyone gets busy. Like Tom and I are like best mates. But it's quite difficult for us to.
20:59 Speaker 01 Say just as a pressing day, like I looked at the amount of people that I don't talk to anymore. As as friends or like and not that I've fallen out with these people or I just, you know, you felt like I was drifted away. But I felt like that on my fortieth, I will say.
21:13 Speaker 00 Yeah, I I I would say, in my opinion, I think when you're in your twenties and probably in your thirties. Uh, I I think you act, you sort of make, you can't move for making friends because you're in these social situations and then all of, you know, you exchange your number and all that. As you get older, I I I actually, you can make friends past forty. I do think the difference is, is that you have to actively do that. So in the past, everyone's looking for friends, right? Because you're, because you're, your evenings are made up of meeting up with people. What does that mean?
21:46 Speaker 01 Well, everyone's there for, we we all know why we're there.
21:48 Speaker 00 Right.
21:48 Speaker 01 You know, friendship's quite cheap. It's second hand. Sometimes you meet a friend for a friend.
21:52 Speaker 00 No, I I know, not that. I it it it started to work as an analogy and then you started to become yourself.
22:00 Speaker 00 But like, I I think that, you know, it you're it you're constantly looking to go out, whereas when people get older, to get actually going out is something you fit in alongside family or whatever else you've got going on. And so what that means is, is you're not putting it out there to try and make friends, right?
22:16 Speaker 01 Yeah.
22:17 Speaker 00 And so actually you can make friends, but you have to make it, in my opinion. Something that you're trying to do. The first thing I'll say is there's nothing to be ashamed about, about your situation. Lots of people have that situation. I have that. Sometimes I'll go to Lisa, I've got a free night or whatever. She's out and I think I might pop out and I think, oh, the fuck am I gonna go out with?
22:38 Speaker 01 Give me a shout.
22:39 Speaker 00 Yeah, but you're so far away. But, um, so that.
22:42 Speaker 01 In distance, by the way, not in like.
22:44 Speaker 00 Yeah, and it's sort of emotionally and intellectually and spiritually. But, um, I, I don't think that's the thing to be ashamed of. I don't think you start getting down about it. But if you want to be in a situation where you've got friends, I think the difference when you're past forty, to sort of reiterate the point I'm making, is you've just got to be a bit more proactive about it and look to. Often you'll find people that you didn't think were up for going out for a drink want to, do you know what I mean? People do wanna get, you know, and what I would say is going out for a lot, when you get above forty, going out on a big one is not as common a thing, but just literally. Popping out for a drink, yeah, nice curry, whatever, all of that, good times.
23:20 Speaker 01 I always think it's a little bit like a film in some ways.
23:23 Speaker 00 Okay, is it a film about a car boot sale?
23:25 Speaker 01 No, no, but it's like early, early years, like, like it's like when you switch on ITV two, right? And if a movie's like, you know. Sort of fifteen minutes in, you'll go, oh, I watched this, I only missed fifteen minutes. Even if it's halfway through, you might watch it. But once it gets to the sort of dying embers of movie, you're not gonna watch like the last fifteen minutes of layer cake.
23:42 Speaker 00 I'm not sure what this analogy is. So you won't make friends on after forty because they're gonna die soon?
23:46 Speaker 01 No, I'm just like, have you seen the best bits? Have you seen the best bits of the movie already? What are the highlights?
23:52 Speaker 00 This does not hold up at all. People are not, you're not going, oh, I don't think I'll go out with a drink with you. I think you've had all your highlights. I think all the action sequences in your life are done.
24:03 Speaker 01 Well, I think most of mine are. I had some action sequence, let me tell you, in my twenties, but I look at it now and think, yeah, I'm like. And but I'd actually say some of the best, the best people I've met have been in the last sort of six years, seven years. I've met some great people after forty that I look at and go, I don't think you should be embarrassed.
24:21 Speaker 00 No, don't be embarrassed. I don't think you should be embarrassed about anything, is the truth. But, um.
24:26 Speaker 01 What in life?
24:27 Speaker 00 Generally, no, yeah. Good luck to you. Thank you so much.
24:30 Speaker 01 Cheers. Thank you for, for writing in.
24:32 Speaker 00 Uh, and that's it, isn't it? That brings us.
24:34 Speaker 01 If you enjoyed, uh, the emails that you heard read out today, maybe you'd like to email in to the wolf and our podcast.
24:41 Speaker 00 What's the address, Tom?
24:44 Speaker 01 Wolf and Owl Podcast at The Wolf and Owl at Podcast Wolf and Owl?
24:50 Speaker 00 No.
24:51 Speaker 01 Uh Wolf Owl Pod?
24:53 Speaker 00 Yes!
24:54 Speaker 01 At gmail.com.
24:55 Speaker 00 Correct.
24:56 Speaker 01 Wolf Owl Pod at gmail.com. Why don't you send your thoughts, worries and animated
25:03 Speaker 01 endeavours?
25:05 Speaker 00 Thank you.
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