Frankie Quiñones

Comedian/actor Frankie Quiñones (CholoFit, This Fool) pulls up to Whiskey Ginger for a fast, feral hang about turning internet fame into real reps, owning your story, and building his new hour DAMN THAT’S CRAZY — dropping October 10 on Hulu (directed by Ali Wong). We get into Chicano family chaos, love & addiction, carne asada politics, and why telling the truth is the funniest flex. Watch the special on Hulu, then come back and tell us your favorite bit. 🍊 FOLLOW FRANKIE • Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/frankiequinones/ • Tour & news: https://frankiequinones.com/ FOLLOW SANTINO & THE SHOW • Santino IG: https://www.instagram.com/cheetosantino/ • Full episodes & clips: https://www.youtube.com/@WhiskeyGingerPodcast #WhiskeyGinger #FrankieQuinones #DamnThatsCrazy #Hulu #AliWong #ThisFool #CholoFit #AndrewSantino #ComedyPodcast #StandUpComedy #ComedyClips #podcastclips ==================================================== Sponsor Whiskey Ginger: https://public.liveread.io/media-kit/whiskeyginger SUPPORT OUR SPONSORS HUEL USE PROMO CODE: WHISKEY SAVE 15% OFF YOUR ORDER https://huel.com/whiskey HIMS 100% ONLINE TREATMENT https://hims.com/whiskey ===================================================== Follow Andrew Santino: https://www.instagram.com/cheetosantino/ https://twitter.com/CheetoSantino Follow Whiskey Ginger: https://www.instagram.com/whiskeygingerpodcast https://twitter.com/whiskeygingerpodcast Produced and edited by Joe Faria https://www.instagram.com/itsjoefaria Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Speaker 00

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• 0:30Speaker 01

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• 1:00Andrew Santino?

  What up, Whiskey Ginger fans? Hey, hey, hey, I'm on the tour. I'm coming to see you. I'm coming to San Francisco. And it's sold out. I think there's a waitlist. But then I go down to Brea Improv. Brea, show up. I love you guys. Then I'm at the Tempe Improv, my old stopping grounds. I go to Hammond, Indiana, the Horseshoe Casino, the week before Thanksgiving. Then I'm at Caesars at Windsor, Ontario, Canada, Bethlehem, PA, Hanover, Maryland, Atlantic City at the Borgata, which I love. I'm excited to come back. Harris at the Valley Center down there in Funner, California, which is close to San Diego. Canyonville, Oregon, there on Valentine's Day. And finally, at the Wynn Casino in Las Vegas in March. Come out and see your boy. Go to andrewsantino.com for those tickets. andrewsantino.com.

• 1:37Speaker 03

  In here, we pour whiskey, whiskey, whiskey, whiskey, whiskey.

• 1:43Speaker 04

  Oh, that creature in the ginger beard. Sturdy and ginger.

• 1:46Speaker 05

  Like Beto, the ginger gene is a curse. Gingers are beautiful. You owe me $5 for the whiskey. $75 for the horse. Ginger's, oh, hell no. The whiskey is.

• 1:57Andrew Santino?

  Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to Whiskey Ginger. My guest today is one of my favorite people and others say that from my guest but I mean once again today is the return of Frankie Canionne. Hey yeah. You know what I love when I, when I type your name in my phone, it autocorrects your, your last name to have the uh.

• 2:16Speaker 06

  The Enya?

• 2:16Andrew Santino?

  The Enya.

• 2:17Speaker 06

  The little wormy homie.

• 2:18Andrew Santino?

  Player, little wormy player.

• 2:19Speaker 06

  Yeah, put the little wormy homie on it.

• 2:20Andrew Santino?

  Put the wormy on it, dog.

• 2:22Speaker 06

  The Enya.

• 2:22Andrew Santino?

  Uh, first of all, first things first, get a little bit of, uh, little bit of business out of the way here. Your special is out October 10th over there on Hulu, Disney Plus internationally. It's all over the world. It's all over the globe. Please go watch my boy, uh, on Hulu. I'm a Hulu cat. He's a Hulu cat. Some Hulu peeps. Uh, where, where'd you shoot the special?

• 2:45Speaker 06

  Portland.

• 2:46Andrew Santino?

  Por- why Por- why Portland?

• 2:48Speaker 06

  Yeah, I know. Everybody's always surprised when you say Portland.

• 2:50Andrew Santino?

  Well, bro, you're not really a Portland guy.

• 2:52Speaker 06

  I know, I know. Everybody's like, why not LA or da, da, da?

• 2:54Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 2:54Speaker 06

  But, uh, I don't know, man. Portland's always been good to me. It's always been a good comedy town to me.

• 2:58Andrew Santino?

  See, this is what I say. I did Minneapolis. People are like, why Minnesota? Well, I did my, I did Chicago. I did Denver. And then I was like, I want another city that I love and I love Minnesota. You love Portland, huh? Pete Towne.

• 3:10Speaker 06

  Yeah, I love it, man.

• 3:11Andrew Santino?

  Where'd you shoot it at? What, what venue?

• 3:12Speaker 06

  Uh, Revolution Hall.

• 3:13Andrew Santino?

  Oh yeah, I played that. I love that spot.

• 3:15Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 3:15Andrew Santino?

  That place is great.

• 3:16Speaker 06

  Yeah, we did two shows in one night. Came out, yeah, it was cool.

• 3:19Andrew Santino?

  Banger, huh? Did you blend them or did you use one?

• 3:21Speaker 06

  Uh, I blended them.

• 3:23Andrew Santino?

  You blended them?

• 3:23Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah.

• 3:24Andrew Santino?

  People don't know.

• 3:24Speaker 06

  Not very much, but.

• 3:25Andrew Santino?

  It happens a lot.

• 3:25Speaker 06

  A little bit.

• 3:26Andrew Santino?

  Sometimes you take like one setup from a joke because it, it came out better. You're like, well, I said it better on this one. Like the laugh might be the same, but you're like, the setup sounded way cleaner on this one.

• 3:35Speaker 06

  Yeah, it was, it was interesting, man, cause the early show was the rowdier crowd.

• 3:39Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, they were nuts.

• 3:39Speaker 06

  So there was like hecklers, but they were like motivational hecklers, like, ah, I'm bad. I'm like, shut the fuck up. I'm, you know, taking a special, you know?

• 3:47Andrew Santino?

  That is funny. The people that cheer the loudest are probably your biggest fans. They're just excited for you.

• 3:50Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, they're excited. But, you know, it was also like, come on, man. And then the late show, for some reason, they were just dialed in. So I thought I was gonna use everything from the late show, but turned out, you know, there was some stuff.

• 3:59Andrew Santino?

  That's how it always works, man.

• 4:00Speaker 06

  You know, you're picky about it though, like a little.

• 4:02Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, a little nuanced.

• 4:02Speaker 06

  I like it when I face this way better on the, you know.

• 4:04Andrew Santino?

  How many times did you watch it, do you think?

• 4:06Speaker 06

  I hate watching myself, you know? Fuck.

• 4:08Andrew Santino?

  Maybe the worst thing in the world.

• 4:09Speaker 06

  Dude.

• 4:10Andrew Santino?

  The anxiety from it. You're like, why did you do that? You look so dumb. Why would I say? Yeah, I hate that, dude.

• 4:15Speaker 06

  I just, I almost like, like watching it like that, you know?

• 4:18Andrew Santino?

  You know, luckily my editor was in, um. Lives up there in the Pacific Northwest. And so thankfully, we did everything on Zoom, so it wasn't as painful for me. You know what I mean? Like, I wasn't in the room with her and my director. I kind of, we were doing it over Zoom, so it was a little bit easier for me to do.

• 4:35Speaker 06

  Huh, interesting.

• 4:36Andrew Santino?

  Like, the anxiety watching it in the room with the editor that I did on my last one.

• 4:40Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 4:40Andrew Santino?

  Hated it.

• 4:41Speaker 06

  Yeah, I was, well, I was just blessed in that way, because Ali Wong directed it, and she executive produced, and she was real hands-on in post. So she was like, you know, you know, a lot of us hate watching ourselves, but

• 4:51Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 4:52Speaker 06

  She was like, hey, let me just do the first cut, and then, and then you can get eyes on it.

• 4:56Andrew Santino?

  Smart.

• 4:56Speaker 06

  And I was like, perfect.

• 4:57Andrew Santino?

  Smart.

• 4:57Speaker 06

  And so, she has a really good eye, too, so, uh, yeah, that was a big help.

• 5:01Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, I mean, honestly, yeah. Ali knows what she's doing. She's been around the block.

• 5:04Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 5:04Andrew Santino?

  How did she, how did you link up with her? Because she's Latino, you're Latino, it's kind of an easy.

• 5:08Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah. Yeah, so we both like taquitos and shit, so, yeah.

• 5:15Andrew Santino?

  How did, how did Ali come to you? Did you come to her, or she come to you?

• 5:18Speaker 06

  Well, you know, I started in, I started doing stand-up in San Francisco.

• 5:21Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, I know you're the Bay Area, right?

• 5:23Speaker 06

  Yeah, Bay Area, so, um, yeah, yeah, I moved, I moved out of LA, because all my homies were getting full pregnant, and they were like, oh, I gotta start working in construction, and I was like, oh, I don't want to do that. But now, they make good money doing construction, though, but, uh,

• 5:34Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, we should go back.

• 5:35Speaker 06

  They're making more money than me. I was like, damn, I moved to Getaway, and they're all like buying houses and shit. Seeping on my homies' couch, like, nah, I'm a comedian. But, uh, but, uh, yeah, I met her at this, uh, open mic called The Brainwash Cafe. It was like a laundromat slash cafe, so they're like a built-in audience, people waiting for their laundry. And, uh, she started, you know, she was obviously a few years ahead of me, but that's the first place I saw her and met her.

• 5:55Andrew Santino?

  How genius, by the way. Get your laundry done and then go listen to some.

• 5:57Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 5:58Andrew Santino?

  Because, man, doing laundry at the laundromat's tough. Because you got headphones, you know, typically you're on your phone, but it's nice to see something else to distract you from the time.

• 6:05Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 6:06Andrew Santino?

  That's like, was it her show, or just it was a mic?

• 6:07Speaker 06

  No, no, just, uh, open mic. They did it every Thursday, and then it started, but it was the longest-running open mic in San Francisco, but it got developers, bought the buildings, condos now, you know, sad story, but.

• 6:16Andrew Santino?

  And that's what the whites do, they take it away.

• 6:18Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 6:18Andrew Santino?

  They give it and they take it away. Where you living now?

• 6:21Speaker 06

  Uh Hollywood.

• 6:22Andrew Santino?

  You're here, you're back.

• 6:23Speaker 06

  Oh, yeah, yeah.

• 6:24Andrew Santino?

  Forever, you're never gonna go away.

• 6:25Speaker 06

  Twenty eleven.

• 6:26Andrew Santino?

  No, I know, I'm just, I didn't know if you left. You never know, man. Some people just, they leave, they leave and then you're like, where you been? They're like, I moved.

• 6:32Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 6:32Andrew Santino?

  That happens a lot.

• 6:33Speaker 06

  Well, since pandemic, for sure.

• 6:35Andrew Santino?

  But you're still here.

• 6:36Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 6:36Andrew Santino?

  You're holding it down.

• 6:37Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah.

• 6:37Andrew Santino?

  You gotta stay in LA.

• 6:39Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, my family's here. I got two godchildren and I just, you know, I'm gonna go see them after this.

• 6:43Andrew Santino?

  You're not getting anybody pregnant, are you?

• 6:44Speaker 06

  Nah, I mean, yeah, my mom wishes, but. She used to be like, no, me, hold, do it right, get married. Now she's like, I don't give a fuck, get a, get a hood rat pregnant, just bring me the baby, motherfucker. And I'm like, damn, mom, cause, cause my mom's hood, bro, like, she's like, but yeah, she don't care no more. She just wants me to get somebody pregnant. She don't care if it's an accident or what.

• 7:00Andrew Santino?

  Ladies out there listening right now. He's available. If you're looking for, if you're looking for someone to fill you up.

• 7:07Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 7:08Andrew Santino?

  My guy is right here. He's got a full tank.

• 7:13Andrew Santino?

  What's the name of the special again?

• 7:15Speaker 06

  Damn, that's crazy.

• 7:15Andrew Santino?

  Damn, that's crazy, man. And also, I complimented you very heavily last time I saw you on how much I loved your show. And I also think I texted you, uh, or we spoke, either I text you or I saw you and said how mad I was that you guys weren't doing that show.

• 7:29Speaker 06

  I know, man, and uh.

• 7:30Andrew Santino?

  I love that show.

• 7:31Speaker 06

  It was like.

• 7:32Andrew Santino?

  It was so clever.

• 7:33Speaker 06

  The amount of text messages I got from my peers was like the most uplifting, like, thing, you know, it was a bummer, you know, that it got canceled, but.

• 7:40Andrew Santino?

  It didn't get canceled.

• 7:41Speaker 06

  And I was like.

• 7:42Andrew Santino?

  It didn't get canceled, it didn't go again.

• 7:43Speaker 06

  Yeah, it didn't go again.

• 7:44Andrew Santino?

  See, I don't believe in that. The old days of cancellation, they would cancel you middle, middle way through. My, the old sitcom days, if it wasn't working out, halfway through the season, they'd go, and that was a cancellation.

• 7:53Speaker 06

  Right.

• 7:53Andrew Santino?

  But when they don't pick it up again, it's just not a cancellation, it's just they didn't, they don't go again. That's how I look at it, because the show was well received, it was well done.

• 8:00Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 8:01Andrew Santino?

  Obviously, they just didn't think it was right to do it again, but I told you, man, I told you how much I liked that show, man. I, and Chris, I said, every time I saw him, I said, damn, I think it's so funny, man. There was, there was nothing like that on the air. Uh, anyway, just giving you your props. It was fantastic, dude.

• 8:16Speaker 06

  This full, still on there. Watch it.

• 8:18Andrew Santino?

  It's on there, yeah, it's there, and it should be back, man. It should be back on another platform.

• 8:21Speaker 06

  Remember, what was that show, Twin Peaks?

• 8:22Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, they redid it.

• 8:23Speaker 06

  They redid it. I'm like praying that that happens, like...

• 8:26Andrew Santino?

  It's not out of the realm of reality, because that does happen enough now, because Netflix does that too. They pick up a show and then it spikes the viewership. People are like, "Do this again." You know, and then people are like, "Maybe we should do it again." Arrested Development. Arrested Development did the same thing.

• 8:39Speaker 06

  Oh dude, I love Arrested. It didn't get popular until after it got taken out there, you know?

• 8:42Andrew Santino?

  Well, Fox cancelled it. Then they picked it up. Like, that was the crazy thing. They actually cancelled that show. They were like, "When this is done, and, uh, I'm glad it came back." But, you know, whatever. You're on to wonderful things.

• 8:54Speaker 06

  What was funny is, uh, like, the week before, we found out, like, I had a meeting at Netflix, actually, just like, you know, about some other stuff.

• 9:01Andrew Santino?

  That big crazy building.

• 9:02Speaker 06

  They were like, "Oh, we love this full over here, you know, like, we wish we had it, dah dah dah." And they were like, I'm like, "Yeah, we're supposed to find out if we, you know, get another season pretty soon." They're like, "Oh, you have nothing to worry about. Like, they gotta pick up that show." And then we find out, like, four days later, it's like, "Yeah, yeah."

• 9:16Andrew Santino?

  And then you're like, "Hey, man, you guys wanna pick it up?" They're like, "No, no, no, that's not, uh..."

• 9:19Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, no, we just, yeah, yeah. We were here, so we just figured, yeah.

• 9:22Andrew Santino?

  We're just being nice. Did you get a cappuccino from the robot in the lobby? The 50 fucking screens?

• 9:27Speaker 06

  Did you see the lowrider bike in the lobby? That's cool, right? That's so cool.

• 9:30Andrew Santino?

  Is that what your people like? Do you like that, lowriders? You guys are always cruising? Is that what you do? We, no, we love Mexicans here at Netflix. Don't get it twisted, pal.

• 9:41Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah. Love me a good Mexi melt, huh? A little nacho cheese patty, you know?

• 9:48Andrew Santino?

  Frankie, don't be alarmed, we brought in a taco truck for you today. We know that you guys love tacos. That is what they should, that they would do. They do that thing where they're like, "And we did something special for you."

• 9:58Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah.

• 9:59Andrew Santino?

  We brought in a chef. You may have heard of him.

• 10:03Andrew Santino?

  He does tacos, been your neighbor, where you guys live.

• 10:05Speaker 06

  Yeah. He likes to cook in La Cosina, you know?

• 10:10Speaker 06

  I'm like, "Wow, that's great."

• 10:12Andrew Santino?

  Well, the new special, go watch it right now. To plug it again and again, I can't say enough how much of a fan I am of you. I've always liked you, man. You're such a funny cat. And we ran into you when we were on the road to Bad Friends. We were talking about it just at lunch. So we were in Sacramento, right? Sac Town, is that where we were? Sacramento, we ran into you. And we rewatched the video of it and I just said, I was like, how's he doing? How's he, what's going on? He said Frankie's coming by, he's gonna come by. And you were humming, huh?

• 10:35Speaker 06

  Oh, fuck.

• 10:36Andrew Santino?

  Come on, man.

• 10:37Speaker 06

  Bobby didn't know though, until I told him later.

• 10:39Andrew Santino?

  I knew.

• 10:40Speaker 06

  You motherfucker, you do.

• 10:41Andrew Santino?

  I knew.

• 10:41Speaker 06

  Yeah, bro.

• 10:42Andrew Santino?

  Well, let's be real about it, you know, like, look.

• 10:43Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 10:43Andrew Santino?

  Sobriety's a very real thing. I knew you, when you, when you first got, uh, first got off and got clean, um, I remember it was a big conversation. I was happy for you, proud of you.

• 10:53Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 10:54Andrew Santino?

  You know, everybody slips, there's nothing wrong with that, there's no judgment in this house, you know, so.

• 10:57Speaker 06

  Yeah, nah.

• 10:58Andrew Santino?

  But you, yeah, you, yeah, I was like, man, I think he's, I think he's having fun lately. I think he was slipping out a little bit.

• 11:03Speaker 06

  Oh, homie, I was like, yeah.

• 11:04Andrew Santino?

  You were cruising, huh?

• 11:05Speaker 06

  I was on a relapse and, uh, you know, I think the last time I was, the last time I was here, I had maybe three months. And then I don't even know if you could sit on relapse, I would just kinda be like, alright, I took a break, you know, I could just, just drink alcohol, no drugs.

• 11:17Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 11:18Speaker 06

  But I always went back, homie.

• 11:19Andrew Santino?

  You always go back, not anymore.

• 11:21Speaker 06

  I like to fart, nah.

• 11:22Andrew Santino?

  You don't go back.

• 11:22Speaker 06

  Yeah, I got almost, I got almost a year now, so.

• 11:25Andrew Santino?

  That's great, dude, congratulations.

• 11:26Speaker 06

  It was shortly after, I don't know when Sacramento was, it was like October or November.

• 11:30Andrew Santino?

  No, no, no.

• 11:31Speaker 07

  February 2024.

• 11:32Andrew Santino?

  February 2024, we had it.

• 11:33Speaker 06

  Oh, fuck, dude, I'm way off.

• 11:34Andrew Santino?

  February 2024.

• 11:35Speaker 06

  Oh, it's February 20, okay, okay, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 11:37Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, we're over a year now since that.

• 11:39Speaker 06

  Okay.

• 11:39Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 11:39Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 11:40Andrew Santino?

  Way over, what am I saying? It's fucking a year and a half since then.

• 11:43Speaker 06

  So, I, I, I think I was doing a club up there or something.

• 11:46Andrew Santino?

  No, you were, he knows.

• 11:48Speaker 07

  No, he was, but we bumped into you on the plane.

• 11:50Andrew Santino?

  We bumped, yeah, you, we took the same flight.

• 11:52Speaker 06

  Right, fuck.

• 11:53Andrew Santino?

  What, were we in Burbank or something like that?

• 11:55Speaker 07

  Yes.

• 11:55Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, we were in Burbank and we, remember we ran into you there, yeah.

• 11:57Speaker 06

  That's right, that's right.

• 11:58Andrew Santino?

  The only other cat I run into consistently in Burbank, I, some people I run into at that airport. Like, it's, it's always the same people. And Felipe, I run into Felipe at Burbank every single, I'm not kidding.

• 12:12Speaker 06

  That's so funny, dude, yeah.

• 12:13Andrew Santino?

  He's always like.

• 12:13Speaker 06

  It's so funny, we're doing Sacramento together, October 4th.

• 12:16Andrew Santino?

  Are you really? I run into him at Burbank all the time, he's always like, what's up, bro? I'm like, hey dude. Every time, I see you every time at Burbank. It is the best airport in the world, man, if it was only, if it only went more places. Oh, bro, I'd never, I'd never go to LAX ever again. But the new special is out right now, so go watch it, we'll knock that out and get that out of the way, but I'm happy that you're, you're staying clean and keeping your head straight, huh?

• 12:37Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, but dude, it's so funny thinking back to that Sacramento thing. I don't know if I was talking to you or Bobby, whoever told me to roll through. They're like, "Come through, Hard Rock."

• 12:46Andrew Santino?

  Well, I said, "Come through," and then Bobby heard you were coming, we got excited as shit. And then you were coordinating with Carlos and these guys to get you on stage.

• 12:52Speaker 06

  Yeah, so I think that gave me an excuse to like, extend my stay in beautiful Sacramento. Cause I think I did the punchline, if I'm not mistaken.

• 13:00Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, you were doing the punch, I think.

• 13:01Speaker 06

  And then your guys' show was kinda like...

• 13:03Andrew Santino?

  Some theater, I don't remember what theater.

• 13:04Speaker 06

  No, it was the Hard Rock.

• 13:05Andrew Santino?

  A casino, the casino.

• 13:06Speaker 06

  Just outside of, in Roseville or something.

• 13:08Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 13:09Speaker 06

  Just outside of Sacramento, yeah. But homie, I was, I was in that hotel room by myself, fucking.

• 13:14Andrew Santino?

  Cruising.

• 13:14Speaker 06

  My little baggies. "Oh, they want me to go to the Hard Rock, I mean, the Bad Friends show," you know? I'm just like, "Alright, pull it together," I took a shower. Alright, did a line, I'm like, "Hey, you look good, right?" "Alright, you're cool?" "Alright, cool," and then I took an Uber out there and then, yeah, yeah. And then I was like, "Okay, be normal," you know, then like, cause you know Bobby's like sober and I was just like, "Alright, don't fucking..."

• 13:33Andrew Santino?

  But Bobby's energy.

• 13:35Speaker 06

  But like...

• 13:35Andrew Santino?

  No, no, you did, you did, you did, but I was like, "He's fucking, he's having a good night." He feels like he's up, like, all I knew was, I was like, "Man, you were cruising." I was like, "Man, I can't believe he's not tired." "Oh, yeah, yeah, he's not tired." Yeah, I was like, "How's he doing all these shows, man?"

• 13:50Speaker 06

  Yeah, then, after my, after my guest spot, and then you guys had me like, kick it up there. It was a fun show, actually.

• 13:55Andrew Santino?

  It's a great show, man.

• 13:56Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah.

• 13:57Andrew Santino?

  Those shows were fucking wild. I loved those days. But no, you had a good pop in it, I was glad to have you.

• 14:01Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, I was like, so I was on that high, like, you know, everybody had a good set.

• 14:05Andrew Santino?

  You were double high, you were high twice.

• 14:06Speaker 06

  But yeah, I went back to the green room, "Okay, I'm done," and started blowing lines right in that green room you guys gave me.

• 14:10Andrew Santino?

  God bless.

• 14:11Speaker 06

  And then, and then I remember I came out and you guys were like, standing right there, like, "Hey, we need a picture," and I was like,

• 14:16Andrew Santino?

  "I love photos!"

• 14:17Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah.

• 14:18Andrew Santino?

  Okay, man, just gotta get a photo on stage.

• 14:20Speaker 06

  And you guys were like, going to eat steak after, and I was like, "Oh, I'm good, I don't feel that hungry for some reason."

• 14:24Andrew Santino?

  Yes, also another tip. I did know, and I said, "We're going to a nice steakhouse," you're like, "No, I don't wanna eat steak," and I was like, "No." You wanna just come eat chicken or some shit? I was like, is he vegetarian? I don't, do you not want meat? No, you didn't, yeah, but now you're good. Stand up at those hotel rooms. I've heard the stories from a lot of comics and friends that you, you get cooped up in a hotel. I mean, I do it too. You know, but I, you know, you get, you gonna run, huh?

• 14:45Speaker 06

  Oh, when you're trying to just, it's so hard, man, in the beginning. Now, you know, you get over like this hump, you know, that you have to get over. And I just couldn't get over it. I'll get a little time sober and then I'm just like, being at airports and comedy clubs. And then you're just isolated in a hotel room. I was like, you know, I just can't, I couldn't kick it with myself like that, you know?

• 15:03Andrew Santino?

  It's hard.

• 15:03Speaker 06

  I had to, I had to numb it out or party or whatever.

• 15:05Andrew Santino?

  Now, what do you do when you feel like you're getting antsy when you're on the road?

• 15:08Speaker 06

  Oh, you know, I have people I call, you know?

• 15:10Andrew Santino?

  Meetings and shit, yeah.

• 15:11Speaker 06

  Meetings and shit like that. We're not allowed to say what it is, but I'm in a 12 step program.

• 15:14Andrew Santino?

  We all know.

• 15:15Speaker 06

  Yeah, exactly.

• 15:15Andrew Santino?

  Why do they pretend like we do? It's like, well, we talk about it pretty openly on Bad Friends about Bobby's sobriety and stuff. And, you know, we, I've been together with him now, like he's my boyfriend.

• 15:23Speaker 06

  I know, no. And you're like, we've been together.

• 15:25Andrew Santino?

  So we've been dating, we've been, okay, we've been sleeping together. Now, but I, but I've been with, I've been with Bobby through some of the worst times. I mean, we started the show when he relapsed and then he relapsed.

• 15:36Speaker 06

  Yeah, what, three years ago?

• 15:37Andrew Santino?

  Two more times after that. Yeah, we had a couple of stints where we had to.

• 15:40Speaker 06

  And that recently?

• 15:42Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, it was a bummer. Yeah, we had some, we had some hiccups, man, and it happens. It is what it is. It's not the end of the world.

• 15:47Speaker 06

  He's the same, same way, likes to isolate and get fucked up. But he was the first one, this was years ago, he was like, he came at me like, you know, he's like, man, you, you got it Frankie, you got, you got the disease, you know, da, da, da. And I'm like, what? Like, I was, I got almost offended. I'm like, bitch, you know, this motherfucker don't know me, homie. You know, like, I just know you like for comedy shit, but, uh, sure enough, it took me like another year. And I was like, oh, fuck, I think you might've been right, you know?

• 16:10Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, he was right.

• 16:12Speaker 06

  So, yeah, yeah, he was right.

• 16:13Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 16:15Andrew Santino?

  But you, but it's, but it is what it is. I think that's a part of life that if people don't wanna talk about it a lot of times, only because it's, people feel like it's dark or it's just you or whatever, but that's not true, man. That's millions and millions and millions of people struggle with it.

• 16:25Speaker 06

  Oh, yeah.

• 16:26Andrew Santino?

  It is what it is. It is what it is.

• 16:27Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 16:28Andrew Santino?

  And it's not, it doesn't define you. It's a thing that happened and that's it.

• 16:31Speaker 06

  Yeah, it's a thing that happened. It's just, it's a gnarly thing, though, just like, what, I can't drink? Yeah, homie. People be like, come on, just have one drink. I'm like, if you wanna pick me up from county jail in a couple of days and y'all have that drink with you, you know, like, that's where I go, homie, you know what I'm saying?

• 16:42Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, if you wanna unpack my life, then yeah. But otherwise, let me just go my own way and do my thing, yeah. Are you on tour right now? Are you touring a new hour or the same hour? What are you doing?

• 16:52Speaker 06

  No, I can't tour the same hour.

• 16:54Andrew Santino?

  Isn't that funny though? Why do we do that? Why can't we?

• 16:56Speaker 06

  I don't know.

• 16:57Andrew Santino?

  The old heads used to do that shit.

• 16:59Speaker 06

  I know, but it was like, I think it was, I don't know, it was David Spade or somebody was doing a, a interview recently and they were like, "Man, sometimes I wish I was a musician, cause then you could just play your ten hit songs." Like comedian though, you have an hour come out, you gotta come up with a whole new hour.

• 17:12Andrew Santino?

  You do, you do. Are you touring a new hour now or no?

• 17:15Speaker 06

  Uh, yeah, yeah, well, you know, just to get through the set, I'm kinda sprinkling still some stuff that's in the special, but after October 10th, obviously I can't do any of that.

• 17:23Andrew Santino?

  I know, isn't that weird?

• 17:23Speaker 06

  I'm just kinda blending it in with the new shit, you know, just trying to work it up and bump all the special stuff out, you know?

• 17:29Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, we're all doing that. You're slowly peeling away until finally you have to feel comfortable to go, "Alright, I just gotta jump now."

• 17:35Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, you know, but, you know, usually in my live shows, I do characters too, like Creeper and stuff like that, so that gives me a little...

• 17:42Andrew Santino?

  Creeper, you do, and what else do you do on the live show?

• 17:45Speaker 06

  Usually just him, but sometimes I'll do, you know, JC or, you know, I'm trying to do Emo Primo, who's a, you know, he's like a emo dude. "Everything's so lame." But, um, yeah.

• 17:56Andrew Santino?

  Emo Primo is fucking genius, dude. That's genius. Are you still doing sketch or no? Are you still writing and performing and doing shit?

• 18:02Speaker 06

  Yeah, we just started doing, uh, you know, I got a warehouse right here close by. I hit you up about it, I'm gonna remind you again, but to come.

• 18:10Andrew Santino?

  Let me know.

• 18:10Speaker 06

  It's, uh, Creeper's crib, live from my grandpa's garage. And, uh, you know, it's kinda like a Peewee's Playhouse kinda format.

• 18:15Andrew Santino?

  Oh, it's dope.

• 18:16Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah.

• 18:16Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, you know I'll come by.

• 18:18Speaker 06

  Water heater talks, up on two flat talks, my slipper, we just kinda kick it, you know?

• 18:23Andrew Santino?

  The Creeper shit really did take off in a way that I knew, I like, I knew, when I first saw it, I thought, "Oh, that, there's no way that's not gonna hit, hit, strike a chord with a lot of people." People love that shit, huh?

• 18:32Speaker 06

  Yeah, man. It's crazy. And like, yeah, I love it when like, people I wouldn't expect like it, like it, you know?

• 18:38Andrew Santino?

  Like a sixty-year-old white woman?

• 18:40Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 18:40Andrew Santino?

  We love Creeper.

• 18:42Speaker 06

  Yeah dude, and it's funny you said Minnesota, cuz like, the first time I went to Minneapolis, I did, was it Acme?

• 18:48Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, Acme.

• 18:48Speaker 06

  And dude, this, this group of like, it was like, five older white women with like, three older Asian women, and they all came to the show, and I'm like, oh, okay, they're here on a Groupon or something, and they waited after, they're like, "Oh honey, we couldn't wait for you to come here."

• 19:01Andrew Santino?

  Wow.

• 19:02Speaker 06

  Like, "We love your spirituality, and da-da-da", and I'm just like, "Oh, thank you."

• 19:07Speaker 06

  They're just like, "Oh shit, okay, we got something."

• 19:09Andrew Santino?

  That is great, bro. Acme Comedy Club, Minneapolis, Minnesota, never played it.

• 19:15Speaker 06

  Oh, really?

• 19:15Andrew Santino?

  Yeah. When I was a young comic, I tried, I tried to tour it, and they wouldn't let me do it, they were like, "Nah, we're good." They fucked me off, do you know that?

• 19:22Speaker 06

  Damn.

• 19:23Andrew Santino?

  So I go back, I shoot a special at the theater. Get fucked, Acme. Get fucked, nerds.

• 19:28Speaker 06

  Yeah, how many sold-out shows?

• 19:29Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, four, four sold-out shows at Pantages, eat my shit, Acme. How about that, bitch? No, they said no to me years ago, before I probably was ready anyway. But I was bummed, cuz that was one that I'd always heard to the grapevine from the older guys, that were like, "You gotta play there." And we tried when I did a Midwest tour.

• 19:45Speaker 06

  Wow.

• 19:46Andrew Santino?

  Wasn't in the cards for the kid, I was doing Broad Ripple, uh, what's that in Indianapolis? But, Hilarities or whatever it was. Crackers? Crackers, Crackers, sorry, Crackers, yeah. Crackers.

• 19:55Speaker 06

  Rest in peace, another one, right?

• 19:56Andrew Santino?

  That's gone?

• 19:57Speaker 06

  Crackers is gone, I think, yeah.

• 19:58Andrew Santino?

  I don't know, I don't know.

• 19:59Speaker 06

  I don't know, maybe I'm wrong, but, yeah, I think it's gone.

• 20:01Andrew Santino?

  Imagine the Crackers, the Crackers social guy is like, "We're still here!"

• 20:04Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah.

• 20:05Andrew Santino?

  "Don't say that!"

• 20:06Speaker 07

  It's closed.

• 20:07Andrew Santino?

  It is closed.

• 20:07Speaker 06

  Yeah, it's kinda closed, hey, thank you, I know, that would've been fucked up.

• 20:11Andrew Santino?

  Acme, Acme though, yeah.

• 20:12Speaker 07

  It closed recently.

• 20:13Andrew Santino?

  It just closed down?

• 20:13Speaker 07

  Yeah, February.

• 20:14Andrew Santino?

  Acme I wanted to go to, but that's it, but I still went back to the city, I showed love to the city, cuz I love that city.

• 20:19Speaker 06

  Yeah, but Acme is, they like you to go, I think it's like, Tuesday through Sun, it's a long week, bro, it's like...

• 20:25Andrew Santino?

  That might've been why, they were probably like, "He has to do Tuesday", I was like, "Nah."

• 20:27Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, it was, I was done.

• 20:29Andrew Santino?

  That's a long time, I did those stints in Vegas. Kimmel Show used to be that way. I think you do that at the Cellar when you still do Vegas now.

• 20:35Speaker 06

  Yeah, I used to do Planet Hollywood, it was seven days, 9pm show every night. God, you're just like, "Get me the fuck outta here", like, cuz, by the 4th, 5th day, you're you know, in the casino.

• 20:46Andrew Santino?

  Every day you walk down, yeah.

• 20:47Speaker 06

  I would just drive out and go for a hike and shit, but, yeah.

• 20:50Andrew Santino?

  That's good, really, what are you doing now when you're on the road, when you're bored? What's taking up most of your time when you're on the road?

• 20:54Speaker 06

  I'm on the road? I don't know, riding, working out. Um, you know, I like to run. Um, but yeah, going to the movies and shit.

• 21:03Andrew Santino?

  Staying in the gym, huh?

• 21:04Speaker 06

  Yeah, well, not stay, you know, I'm trying to get it in, homie.

• 21:06Andrew Santino?

  It's so hard, dude. When you go to the hotel, you're like, either do that, or you just jerk off and nap again.

• 21:12Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah.

• 21:12Andrew Santino?

  For the fifth time today.

• 21:13Speaker 06

  I've been getting into edging lately. Kirk Fox got me into edging.

• 21:16Andrew Santino?

  He looks like an edger.

• 21:17Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah. He, he explained it to me, like the spirituality of it, and I'm like, fuck, it's hard though, bro.

• 21:22Andrew Santino?

  Get close and stop.

• 21:22Speaker 06

  It's, ah, ah, and then just, whew. And then it's, alright, just go do shit, something else, you know, just, but you're like, oh, ugh.

• 21:29Andrew Santino?

  He, dude, it's so funny, Kirk Fox does absolutely seem like he'd be like, "You gotta edge, man."

• 21:34Speaker 06

  Yeah, he talked me into it.

• 21:36Andrew Santino?

  You gotta get close and then stop.

• 21:38Speaker 06

  Yeah, he's like, you, you know, you fill yourself up with all this energy and you, you just keep it there for as long as you can. Then you let it go.

• 21:45Andrew Santino?

  Full panic. That's full panic to me. I couldn't do it. No. Edging, have you done it? No, I can't do it.

• 21:53Speaker 06

  He's like, nah.

• 21:54Andrew Santino?

  No, I let it rock, dude.

• 21:55Speaker 06

  If I wanna bust, I bust.

• 21:59Speaker 03

  In here, we pour whiskey.

• 22:02Andrew Santino?

  Hey, I'm here to tell you about Huell and their Daily Greens. This stuff is so, so good. Uh, this is my favorite, the blueberry, lemon, and thyme. Thyme, thyme as it were, and I'm also holding on to the apple, cucumber, and mint, which is very good, but I'm, I'm a huge, huge fan of the blue, blueberry. This is developed by registered, uh, nutritionists and dieticians. This stuff is so good. You've heard about Huell before, but the Daily Greens is the new thing for them. It's only 25 calories, 4 grams of fiber, 1 gram of sugar. There's no sugar in here whatsoever. Not gonna have a sweet tooth with this. 42 vitamins and minerals in superfoods, and, uh, it is very delicious. The best part is it's good. You hear about all this stuff, and, uh, you're like, oh, but how does it taste? I'm telling you, um, these stuff,

• 22:44Andrew Santino?

  these things taste delicious. For 25 calories in the morning, I can knock out my, my Daily Greens, uh, and not worry about, uh, sugars and all sorts of added nonsense that I don't want and that taste terrible. Um, and, uh, this Daily Greens is my new favorite thing. So you've heard of Huell before, uh, you know about the, you know about the powder, uh, and that 40 grams of protein in that powder is so good. 6 grams of fiber and they got 20 essential, 27 essential vitamins and minerals in there. And that's under three bucks a meal when you have that Huell powder, ready in 60 seconds. But I'm telling you, this Daily Greens fast, cool way to start your day. So please try this. Huell makes healthy eating simple. Try both today with 15% off your purchase for new customers with our exclusive code whiskey at huell.com/whiskey.

• 23:27Andrew Santino?

  Use the code and fill out the post checkout survey to help support the show. Once again, that's huell.com/whiskey.

• 23:34Speaker 04

  Ginger. I like cinders.

• 23:38Speaker 00

  Coca-Cola. For the big, for the small, the short, and the tall. Peacemakers, risk takers. For the optimists, pessimists. For long distance love. For introverts and extroverts. The thinkers and the doers. For old friends and new. Coca-Cola. For everyone. Pick up some Coca-Cola at a store near you.

• 24:07Andrew Santino?

  Yo, tell me, why did you choose Hulu? I'm interested to know everybody's case. Cause everyone that signed up and they told us all the names that were on it. I was like, I wonder why everybody chose. Why did you choose?

• 24:15Speaker 06

  Yeah, you know what? Honestly, when I saw you and Bobby were doing it, that was like a big plus for me too, but.

• 24:20Andrew Santino?

  Isn't that funny? Cause that's the same for us. When we saw Burr and it's like they baited us with one guy and I was like, alright. I mean, it was like, they're doing it, I'll try it. Why not?

• 24:29Speaker 06

  Yeah, Sebastian and, and.

• 24:30Andrew Santino?

  That's how people get addicted to things. They go, how good, that guy does it? I mean, might as well try it. See? That's addictive personality. We're like, well, they're all doing it.

• 24:37Speaker 06

  There's a redhead and an Asian homie also involved. Alright, cool.

• 24:40Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, we're good. We're good.

• 24:42Speaker 06

  But uh, it was just the timing really, cause uh, me and Ally were already kinda talking about it, like her producing and directing it. And then, all of a sudden, it was like shortly after we started, we were kinda just like Lucy talking about this. She hit me up. She's like, yo, you wanna get serious about this? I'm like, alright, so I started doing some, you know, tour dates with her, just so she could get a feel for what I was doing on stage and then um, and then around that time Hulu announced like, yo, we're gonna launch this slate of stand up specials, you know? And then so. You know, uh, Ally's obviously got a close ties with, you know, Netflix and so Hulu just came in harder, man. They came in more aggressive and then I was more like, you know, I kinda have a built in audience here because of this fool. So it just seemed like, you know, an easy choice.

• 25:25Andrew Santino?

  It is a good step.

• 25:26Speaker 06

  And it was like, you know, I know, you know, Netflix is great at stand up specials, but there was a lot on there, you know? And then they were like, the way Hulu presented is like, we're gonna do one a month. We're gonna push that special for that whole month.

• 25:37Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 25:38Speaker 06

  That's how we're gonna do it. That was really like appealing, you know?

• 25:40Andrew Santino?

  I was gonna switch with you initially because my birthday month is October. I said, it'd be great if I swi- if I had October. They said, well, we want you in September.

• 25:47Speaker 06

  Yeah, September is when my birthday is.

• 25:49Andrew Santino?

  Well, why wouldn't they switch, bro? See? And they put me on September 12th, the day after nine eleven. It was like, great promo. Are you scared of American tragedies? Well, guess what? Tomorrow, Andrew Santino's white noise. It was wild when they gave me the date on the phone. I was like, nine twelve, huh? They're like, yeah. I was like, alright. We'll take it. Whatever.

• 26:14Speaker 06

  It seems like it's working out though, yeah.

• 26:16Andrew Santino?

  It's doing fine. I think it's doing great. We don't know. We stayed at number one in the movie section for a long time. We're number three right now, so you just hope people watch it and like it. There's no way to know that you're like, I don't know, you put it out. You just gotta throw it up. And it was also a culmination of years of

• 26:31Andrew Santino?

  peeling apart other stuff and, and putting it together, jokes from the Bad Friends tour and then from my own tour, so.

• 26:36Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, we're how much of that, how much of that material were you like, oh shit, I gotta get this special done? Like, how much of it was recent because of the special?

• 26:46Andrew Santino?

  I wanted all of it gone because I was tired of doing it because I had done it on Bad Friends and on mine. So it was like, I was intermingling both. So I was ready to rock. I was like, I gotta get rid of this fucker. By February, when I filmed it, I was like, gotta, I gotta go, dude. You know, it's so funny that we feel that way, like, the audience doesn't know, but you're like, dude, I can't, I've done this, I can't do this joke again. I've done this joke.

• 27:06Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 27:07Andrew Santino?

  Eight thousand fucking times. And then there's guys that do the same jokes for the rest of their life and they don't give a shit. I wanna do that. I wanna tell the same shit.

• 27:14Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 27:14Andrew Santino?

  I wanna be like the old heads.

• 27:15Speaker 06

  You guys ready for the hits?

• 27:17Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, play those bangers, dude. I think about that all the time, like the Bob Hope generation, all the older comics and like all those guys, they would do, I mean, you know, that was the thing is that people wanted to hear Dangerfield do shit they already heard.

• 27:30Speaker 06

  Right, right.

• 27:31Andrew Santino?

  Which had to have been kind of wild for him to write new shit, because they were like, no, no, do the other stuff about your wife.

• 27:35Speaker 06

  I know, dude.

• 27:36Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 27:36Speaker 06

  There's no respect stuff.

• 27:38Andrew Santino?

  Show us that you have no respect, dude. Well, I don't, I mean, you're not respecting me, but show it, but tell it to us right now.

• 27:44Speaker 06

  Dude, every time I would get discouraged, like, because you know, I was starting to get older, I was like.

• 27:48Andrew Santino?

  How old are you now?

• 27:50Speaker 06

  I'm in my 40s, bro.

• 27:51Andrew Santino?

  Oh, he's being coy about it. So cute, dude.

• 27:54Speaker 06

  Forty-five.

• 27:55Andrew Santino?

  Are you really?

• 27:55Speaker 06

  I just turned 45.

• 27:56Andrew Santino?

  Damn, I look way older than you, dude. I'm 42. Damn, dude. That's good. What is it? If black don't crack?

• 28:05Andrew Santino?

  It's, uh, brown what? Brown don't frown? What is brown?

• 28:08Speaker 06

  Yeah, I guess brown just positive vibes.

• 28:14Andrew Santino?

  Brown just positive vibes.

• 28:17Speaker 07

  Brown don't go down.

• 28:18Andrew Santino?

  Brown go, brown don't go down.

• 28:19Speaker 06

  But, uh.

• 28:19Andrew Santino?

  Brown goes up.

• 28:21Speaker 06

  But yeah, I would always think of Dangerfield, dude, because his story is like, he didn't even pop till he was in his 50s, you know?

• 28:26Andrew Santino?

  Well, yeah, and he was what, a refrigerator salesman or some shit?

• 28:29Speaker 06

  Aluminum siding, bro.

• 28:30Andrew Santino?

  Aluminum siding, yeah. I can't believe that's a real.

• 28:32Speaker 06

  Aluminum siding, bro.

• 28:33Andrew Santino?

  Did you have a bunch of shitty jobs early on?

• 28:35Speaker 06

  Oh, yeah.

• 28:35Andrew Santino?

  What's, what's, what's the most shit job you had?

• 28:38Speaker 06

  You know what's crazy? Well, I worked in a, I worked at a hardware store for a long time and then, but this was before I started comedy. And then I was doing a shipping and receiving, like in a warehouse, doing pallets and shit. And then.

• 28:48Andrew Santino?

  Forklift?

• 28:49Speaker 06

  Dude.

• 28:49Andrew Santino?

  Certified, bro? You forklift certified?

• 28:51Speaker 06

  Nah, nah, nah, I'm not forklift certified, but I can get down on one a little bit. But, uh, when I moved back to LA, my, I was like, oh, cool, you know, I'm gonna figure shit out. But my dad, bro, he was not having it. He would, he would get it, go into the room I was sleeping in every morning, like 7:00 AM, what's up? What's going on today? What are you doing today, huh?

• 29:10Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, well.

• 29:10Speaker 06

  And I'm like, ah, well, come on, dad, I just moved back.

• 29:12Andrew Santino?

  7:00 AM, dog.

• 29:13Speaker 06

  Yeah, dude. He took me one of those labor-ready places on me, it was like ex-cons and like illegal immigrants and shit. And you just sit there, like, you're like a fucking, you're in a fishbowl, you know, and then like, these fools come up to you that need workers and they just kind of like evaluate you and you're just kind of sitting there like, oh dude, that was. Terrible, bro. And then these guys will be like, hey, if you work hard, I'll give you a tip, you know, and then you'll bust your ass. And at the end of the day, be like, oh, sorry, I don't have no cash, but I'll pick you next time. You know, they just do whatever to get the most out of you.

• 29:39Andrew Santino?

  Shady shit.

• 29:40Speaker 06

  Advantage of you, yeah. And this one guy was, you're literally like, we're like digging holes and trenches and shit. And I'm like, what, what the fuck am I doing? There's gotta be something better.

• 29:47Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 29:47Speaker 06

  So that's when I got into the restaurant game, you know, busting tables and running food and then started serving and shit. But yeah, I kept getting fired from those jobs because some months I would request too many days off and.

• 29:57Andrew Santino?

  Cause you have to be on, you're doing shows.

• 29:59Speaker 06

  I was doing shows, so, you know, in the beginning is inconsistent. You have a good month. Where you make like a couple grand, then you make five grand, then you make nothing the next month. And then that's when, um, Postmates came about, or DoorDash. And I had to go get my DUI expunged so I could do fucking DoorDash.

• 30:16Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 30:17Speaker 06

  And when it's funny, cause I think I, I think I delivered to you a couple times, but I knew.

• 30:23Andrew Santino?

  No.

• 30:23Speaker 06

  You lived on Franklin, on those apart, or sorry, I don't wanna say.

• 30:27Andrew Santino?

  No, no, no, I haven't lived there in a long time. When I lived on Hollywood.

• 30:30Speaker 06

  Homie, I delivered to your spot. And I've always, and I keep forgetting to bring that up to you. But I remember.

• 30:35Andrew Santino?

  When I lived on Hollywood Boulevard, yeah.

• 30:37Speaker 06

  Yes.

• 30:37Andrew Santino?

  I was on Hollywood and La Brea.

• 30:38Speaker 06

  In that complex.

• 30:39Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 30:40Speaker 06

  Real nice one.

• 30:40Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, dude. You went to, you delivered to my shit.

• 30:43Speaker 06

  I was like, oh, this fool lives right here, you know?

• 30:46Andrew Santino?

  Dude, that's wild.

• 30:47Speaker 06

  Yeah, and then like, you were, you know, I was doing a, a bi-monthly show at the Hollywood Improv called For the People Comedy, like I was just on that grind, flyers and shit. And then they, they put you on my show a couple of times. I was like, oh, cool, he's on the show.

• 30:59Andrew Santino?

  No, no, why you never tell me this?

• 31:00Speaker 06

  Come up to you in the back, hey, thanks for doing my show. I'm like, yeah, thanks for having me, you know, I'm like, oh shit, it's Andrew Santino.

• 31:04Andrew Santino?

  No, that's so funny, bro.

• 31:06Speaker 06

  And then I don't wanna be creepy, I'll be like, hey, I delivered to you.

• 31:11Andrew Santino?

  You know what's so funny is I saw my, when, when, uh, my buddy, I'm not gonna say his name, but my buddy lost his gig and it was tough and. He started delivering, and I saw him delivering one time, and he looked at me like, like I caught him doing something bad. Do you know what I mean? Like, he, I like, I caught him red-handed and he was like, hey, man. I was like, what's up? And he's like, nothing. I was like, are you good? He's like, I'm fine, man. I think he was mad that I saw him deliver. Do you know what I mean? Like it bummed him out.

• 31:39Speaker 06

  Really?

• 31:39Andrew Santino?

  Well, cause he had lost a, a good gig and he was, he was tripping about it a little bit. I think he, I could tell it bummed him out.

• 31:44Speaker 06

  I was, I had a little, like a little window where it was.

• 31:47Andrew Santino?

  Well, you never told me you delivered to me, man. You never even said that.

• 31:49Speaker 06

  I've been meaning to tell you.

• 31:51Andrew Santino?

  Whatever bullshit, whatever Chinese food I ordered. Back in the day, I used to love that apartment complex, man, that was great. You know why? Because that, that, that place on Hollywood. Nobody, it was like a, it was like a, this is pre. OnlyFans. But like, all the girls living there, it was paid apartments by some rich guy. You know what I mean? Like some rich guy would pay for these hot women to like live there.

• 32:16Speaker 06

  Oh my god, and I think it was this apartment complex, I always, I'll never fuck, I'll never forget this story, bro. I delivered to a girl that she opened the door in, in, topless in her underwear.

• 32:27Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 32:28Speaker 06

  And she's like, oh, can you put it in the kitchen? Like she could have grabbed the shit from me.

• 32:32Andrew Santino?

  So you walked in with her titties out?

• 32:33Speaker 06

  Dude, I walked in. She had, she had her nails like freshly done and I'm like, obviously she was getting something out of that, like.

• 32:40Andrew Santino?

  Oh yeah.

• 32:41Speaker 06

  Just to be like, oh, the little delivery boy here, I'll give you a little show.

• 32:44Andrew Santino?

  Hot.

• 32:46Andrew Santino?

  Like models or actresses.

• 32:47Speaker 06

  Total sense, bro.

• 32:48Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, and it was so funny, because you, half of the apartments were empty, because they weren't there, like they were traveling, or some rich guy would fly them around the world or whatever. But I remember this, there was nights where I'd look around at the lights in the patios, you know, like in the apartments? And not, you know, not one of the lights was on in half of the floors, and I was like, where the fuck is everybody? But then I started just getting it, I was like, oh right, all these chicks are, this is ever paid for. Some guy is like, you know, hey, I'll buy you an apartment.

• 33:13Speaker 06

  I need you over here, I need you in Miami this weekend.

• 33:15Andrew Santino?

  I need you in Spain now, right.

• 33:17Speaker 06

  Fuck, that's crazy.

• 33:18Andrew Santino?

  I don't know why you never told me.

• 33:20Speaker 06

  Well, I'm telling you now.

• 33:21Andrew Santino?

  I know, it's so funny, man.

• 33:23Speaker 06

  That's so crazy, yeah.

• 33:24Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, that place, I used to love that place, I couldn't live in Hollywood anymore, man, it got the best of me. When a guy was like pissing on my door, on the front door, I was like, that's it, man.

• 33:31Speaker 06

  Oh, yeah, yeah.

• 33:32Andrew Santino?

  And people broke into our garage all of the time.

• 33:35Speaker 06

  I had, you know, even when, after I made it, and then I, well, you know, I don't know what made it means, but I bought a home, you know? So it was like, I bought, I got a condo in La Brea and Sunset. Beautiful, it was dope, you know, it's loft style, private rooftop, all that. But when the pandemic hit, it was like, we had a library across the street, and they closed the library, so they let fools camp there. Fools started breaking in our garage, we were finding foil and black straws, fools were just fuck chasing the dragon in our fucking garage and shit, like. They broke in my car, they fucking, it was like, what the fuck's going on, you know?

• 34:05Andrew Santino?

  Some girl in my old complex got her car broken into twice, but this is the funniest part, she got her car broken into, I'll never forget, it was by the elevator. And she got her car broken into, it was like a Range Rover, and she had like tons of shit in there. And she claimed it was like Louis Vuitton purses, a computer. Jewelry, cash, whatever. And then she got broken into again. And she said she lost all this other stuff and I was like.

• 34:26Speaker 06

  Why is she rolling around with all that stuff in her car?

• 34:28Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, I was like, either you had someone do it because you want to collect insurance. Or you're that dumb, you keep leaving all this nice shit in your car. Take it upstairs bitch, you live upstairs.

• 34:36Speaker 06

  Yeah, you live right there.

• 34:37Andrew Santino?

  What do you, but she complained twice, but other cars got broken into. So. I was so scared, I never put, I left nothing in my car, but that was the old days when I was in Culver City. My Hyundai got broken into and a guy stole CDs, that's how long ago that was. A guy stole a book of CDs. That killed me, bro. A book of CDs. I was like, really? You broke my window for CDs? That's, I, because I, someone told me last night, who was talking to me, they were talking about Culver City and I was like. Oh, Fitz, Fitz dog. We were talking about, um, Culver City and how, uh. You know, someone he knows used to work down there and I was like, man, it's so funny how nice that is now. Because when I was living there. It was a nightmare. I, like, I hated walking home from shows late at night because the gas station was right there and there was always someone tweaking out the gas station. Walking up the, walking up and down National.

• 35:21Speaker 06

  Right on the other side of a gas station. They would actually jump over the fence from the gas station in there, but. Yeah, when I had to walk home late at night, like.

• 35:28Andrew Santino?

  I hated it, dude.

• 35:28Speaker 06

  I would just pretend I was pissed off about something. I'd be walking like, fuck this motherfucker, fuck, you know, just like pacing like.

• 35:35Andrew Santino?

  If you talk to yourself, that weirds them out. If you're like, well, you, you, you, you don't have to be there at four, you gotta get there at six. If you're just yelling, then they're just like, oh, this guy's fucked up too, like something's wrong with him.

• 35:47Speaker 06

  They're like, I don't want to deal with that, I'll take the next one, it'll be easier. You become a less easier target, you know, that asshole's gonna fuck him.

• 35:52Andrew Santino?

  But that fucked me up. I used to have to park so far away from my house because we didn't have parking, but. You know, it was a shared duplex. And there was never street parking on National, it was on National. And so I'd have to park way, way down by like the gas station or by the freeway, under the freeway.

• 36:07Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 36:08Andrew Santino?

  And I fucking, every time I was like, God, I'm, I hate this shit, dude. But I didn't have any, I had nothing to rob anyway. I just knew someone was trying, gonna try to fuck with me.

• 36:17Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 36:17Andrew Santino?

  I mean, I had a, I had a cellphone to steal.

• 36:19Speaker 06

  It's hectic, bro, in those neighborhoods, yeah, but, you know, I'm glad, I'm glad that I. Went, yeah, now it's nice over there, but, yeah, it's, uh, even where, where I used to live is, it cleaned. cleaned up a little since uh since they opened everything back up but but yeah it was I mean I don't regret you know living there I was like I liked it

• 36:35Andrew Santino?

  it was nice

• 36:35Speaker 06

  I liked it like yeah give me the action and the weirdos

• 36:37Andrew Santino?

  makes you feel something

• 36:38Speaker 06

  but now I'm glad where I'm at now I'm in a chill ass neighborhood

• 36:40Andrew Santino?

  well now you're kicking it

• 36:41Speaker 06

  yeah

• 36:44Andrew Santino?

  all the fans are saying that you got too fancy everybody's like Frankie got way too fancy bro so fucking fancy dude now would you would you tour uh would you tour creeper without doing stand up too like you said you put in an act do you just do it solo now or no

• 36:58Speaker 06

  yeah no no I do I'll do I do both I'll do

• 37:01Andrew Santino?

  you'll you'll tour just him on his own

• 37:02Speaker 06

  no no no no I do

• 37:03Andrew Santino?

  you do always do blend them

• 37:05Speaker 06

  yeah yeah yeah I do Frankie stand up and creeper

• 37:07Andrew Santino?

  do you ever wanna not do both do you wanna just do you or no

• 37:10Speaker 06

  I don't know people always ask me that and I don't know I like I like being able to dip into both you know I feel like it keeps they keep each other fresh but yeah yeah yeah it's it is you know I am getting older you know fuck so doing all the squats and the hopping around you know what I'm saying I gotta put ointments on and shit after tour after like weekends at clubs I was just like oh fuck

• 37:31Andrew Santino?

  your back is hurting

• 37:32Speaker 06

  but but yeah it's fun though you know I like it

• 37:34Andrew Santino?

  have you seen that dude on TikTok who does burpees uh

• 37:38Speaker 06

  yeah the burpees king

• 37:39Andrew Santino?

  that dude is fascinating

• 37:40Speaker 06

  shredded homie

• 37:41Andrew Santino?

  and the floor is is has uh you know like his indentations on have you seen that guy he's like indentations in the floor from doing so many burpees cuz he he obviously was locked up for a long time started doing burpees and then when he got out he's like influencing people to do burpees he's like you don't need a gym dog just work out but that dude is so jacked

• 37:59Speaker 06

  he's doing like 1200

• 38:00Andrew Santino?

  he's doing like 500 burpees a day dude it's crazy

• 38:02Speaker 06

  it's like damn

• 38:04Andrew Santino?

  he's jacked as fuck you've never seen this guy he does it from here he's

• 38:08Speaker 06

  the burpees king

• 38:08Andrew Santino?

  he's in LA isn't he in LA somewhere

• 38:10Speaker 06

  yeah he's in LA yeah

• 38:11Andrew Santino?

  that you should have a have the burpees king come come do a creeper burpees combo bro

• 38:15Speaker 06

  oh yeah man sure he'll run my ass to the ground yeah but yeah yeah that'd be dope

• 38:19Andrew Santino?

  he's legit I was watching that dude and I couldn't believe how many he would do in a row and I thought this is the way that you get out of the prison system and constructively go alright well here's something I learned I should just stick with this nobody could do that shit his arms I mean burpees are probably the best one of the best workouts you could do if you have the gall to do them every time I tried to do that at the gym I always look like a bitch jumping down I look like a bitch going down to do a push up and then if your arms are too tired and you start getting noodle arms I'm like

• 38:53Andrew Santino?

  No, that dude is legit. But no, the reason I asked is because, you know, when I I had a bunch of characters that I did when I auditioned years ago for SNL and I was like, this friend of mine was like, "You should do them with your shit." And I always was so scared to do them. I do think it takes a lot of balls to go back and forth. It's harder than people think.

• 39:13Speaker 06

  You auditioned for SNL?

• 39:14Andrew Santino?

  Forever ago, 2000 and I don't know, look it up. Look up when Pete joined, when Pete got it. It was me, Dan Soder and Pete Davidson.

• 39:22Speaker 06

  Oh wow, crazy.

• 39:23Andrew Santino?

  It was down to us three, isn't that crazy?

• 39:25Speaker 06

  Wow.

• 39:25Andrew Santino?

  It was a bunch of people.

• 39:26Speaker 06

  2014.

• 39:27Andrew Santino?

  14, that's when it was, yeah. Wow, that really, 2014?

• 39:30Speaker 06

  I think I did.

• 39:31Andrew Santino?

  11 years ago.

• 39:33Speaker 06

  2018?

• 39:34Andrew Santino?

  You went to New York?

• 39:36Speaker 06

  Yep.

• 39:36Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, it was great, right? It was fun.

• 39:38Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, it was cool.

• 39:39Andrew Santino?

  Fun little time.

• 39:40Speaker 06

  I suck at auditions, that's just not my thing, but that was one of my better ones. Because everybody was like, you know, the homies that did it before, they're like, "Look, you're gonna get there, they're gonna make you wait like three or four hours."

• 39:50Andrew Santino?

  At least, all day.

• 39:51Speaker 06

  So I was ready for all that and they're like, you know, Lauren's gonna be there, he's gonna have a little video village to see how you look on TV.

• 39:57Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 39:57Speaker 06

  And he's gonna have like four or five people next to him and they're not gonna give you shit. So just commit to your, whatever you're doing.

• 40:04Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, well, no, they did laugh, they laughed a little bit.

• 40:06Speaker 06

  Yeah, they laughed for me. And he clapped for me at the end too.

• 40:08Andrew Santino?

  Me too, that's what I was like.

• 40:09Speaker 06

  I went back to the hotel room like, "Fuck, homie."

• 40:11Andrew Santino?

  And you went back to those towers, that hotel they put you in right across the street.

• 40:15Speaker 06

  Yep.

• 40:15Andrew Santino?

  That, which gives you more anxiety because you are right across the street.

• 40:18Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 40:19Andrew Santino?

  And you're thinking, you're like, "It's right there. It's just right there." You never auditioned again? That was it?

• 40:24Speaker 06

  That was it.

• 40:25Andrew Santino?

  Man, you would have been fantastic too. I don't know, why'd you never want to do it again?

• 40:29Speaker 06

  I think, well, I don't know, they started hearing, "Oh, the horror," I mean, you know, I don't know.

• 40:34Andrew Santino?

  Horror stories, yeah.

• 40:35Speaker 06

  Yeah, the horror stories. It's just like, I don't know, but obviously I would have taken it if I got it. It's a great launching pad and all that, but then I started doing other TV work and then I did this full and all that. I'm like, "Oh, I'd much rather be doing that."

• 40:47Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, you're on your own path.

• 40:48Speaker 06

  Than this. And I think, I genuinely think he might have been like, "This guy's good, but he's not good for this show," or something. Because of the fact that he was laughing and he clapped for me, but I don't know, everybody always, just because I do characters, you know, they automatically think SNL.

• 41:02Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, well, you are very dynamic. I mean, you're good. You're good at it, bro.

• 41:06Speaker 06

  Oh, thank you, homie, but.

• 41:07Andrew Santino?

  We'll make our own show.

• 41:08Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, let's do it.

• 41:09Andrew Santino?

  We'll make our own little show. Well, you're sketch, you're still doing sketches with the same guys, right?

• 41:13Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 41:14Andrew Santino?

  With Donny Devanian, how do you say his name?

• 41:18Speaker 06

  Donnie Devonian?

• 41:18Andrew Santino?

  Devonian, Devonian. I love that dude.

• 41:21Speaker 06

  Oh, yeah, yeah, dude, he's gonna be pumped to hear you.

• 41:23Andrew Santino?

  That motherfucker's so funny. He's one, do you know this cat? He's one of the funniest dudes.

• 41:26Speaker 06

  It blows my mind that he hasn't been like on a major sitcom or something.

• 41:29Andrew Santino?

  He's so fucking funny.

• 41:30Speaker 06

  So likeable, so easy to work with.

• 41:31Andrew Santino?

  He's an inch away. Everybody's an inch away in that position where when they're talented and interesting, he is, he's right there. He's so good, man.

• 41:38Speaker 06

  Hell, yeah.

• 41:39Andrew Santino?

  When I was watching you guys from, this is years ago when I first started seeing you do those, I thought they were so funny. You guys are great together.

• 41:45Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 41:45Andrew Santino?

  Uh.

• 41:46Speaker 06

  We just, we just made a movie called, uh, yeah.

• 41:48Andrew Santino?

  What is it?

• 41:49Speaker 06

  Plant Man and Blondie. Yeah, it's gonna, well, you know.

• 41:51Andrew Santino?

  Man and Blondie.

• 41:51Speaker 06

  We're gonna show it at Sundance and then hopefully.

• 41:53Andrew Santino?

  Are you really?

• 41:54Speaker 06

  After that and probably South.

• 41:55Andrew Santino?

  Fucking huge.

• 41:56Speaker 06

  So we'll.

• 41:57Andrew Santino?

  Plant Man and Blondie. What is it? You want to tell me the premise or no?

• 41:59Speaker 06

  Yeah, it's about, you know, houseplants, pretty much comedy and.

• 42:02Andrew Santino?

  Really?

• 42:03Speaker 06

  Donnie plays.

• 42:05Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, he's not gonna like that.

• 42:06Speaker 06

  Donnie plays this magical character who like, if you don't water your plants, he'll break into your house and water your plants for you. And if the plant's dying, he'll straight up steal it. So he's doing illegal shit, but it's all for the love of plants.

• 42:15Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 42:16Speaker 06

  And then Cory's like, you know, caught up in his Zoom work life, disconnected from nature and they kind of formed this bond. Me and my mom and dad are running, running a struggling nursery. And, uh, he brings the plants there and we have a sanctuary, a hidden sanctuary in the back where we nurse them back to hell.

• 42:31Andrew Santino?

  That's great.

• 42:32Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 42:33Andrew Santino?

  Who wrote this? All you guys did together or did somebody write it up?

• 42:35Speaker 06

  Mostly the, uh, Donnie, uh, Cory and Rob and then I helped, uh, you know, I would go in like maybe once, once a week, twice a week. Cause I'm doing my own shit, but you know, that was, you know, just.

• 42:46Andrew Santino?

  And Kirk, Kirk popped into a few of those.

• 42:47Speaker 06

  Oh, yeah. Kirk's in the movie. Yeah, yeah.

• 42:49Andrew Santino?

  Oh, he is?

• 42:49Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 42:50Andrew Santino?

  I didn't get a call.

• 42:51Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 42:52Andrew Santino?

  Thanks, bro. Didn't get a call. Can't get any work in this fucking town, man. No, nobody wants me in their shit. I think last time.

• 42:58Speaker 06

  Don't act like you're too busy, bro.

• 43:00Andrew Santino?

  I, I got nothing. Tell him, dude. Tell him I'm on the outs. I'm on the fucking downslide. Just sits around all day. Sits around all fucking day.

• 43:06Speaker 06

  Yeah, right. Oh, yeah.

• 43:07Andrew Santino?

  I do, bro. When I, when I, I think I told you last time I saw you that I, I was like, man, if you ever got something small in that, in your, in your world, I'll jump on.

• 43:15Speaker 06

  Oh, dude, we would love that.

• 43:16Andrew Santino?

  Give me like a little tiny throwaway. I told Gillis this. Oh, uh, maybe. No, I told Shane, I was, we were talking, joking, and I said, "You know what you should do with me with tires? Is put me in the background to not say anything, like as an extra, but don't acknowledge it, ever." And he's like, "That would be fucking funny." I was like, "Oh, it'd be funny. I would, I'd be down to do some shit like that." But I think people-

• 43:39Speaker 06

  Like a little Easter egg, like, "Is that Andrew said Tito back there?"

• 43:42Andrew Santino?

  I guess, why not?

• 43:42Speaker 06

  Why hasn't he say anything? You're like, "He's busy, bro."

• 43:44Andrew Santino?

  He's busy, dawg.

• 43:46Speaker 06

  He's working on that car back there.

• 43:47Andrew Santino?

  He's got shit going on, man. I think that, I was, I think that's a funnier version. Because now the world of TV and film is so weird. I mean, it's so strange of like-

• 43:56Speaker 06

  Dude, it's a weird time, bro, yeah.

• 43:58Andrew Santino?

  It's strange. So, I was like, "Just throw me in the background for, for a beat, I think it'd be funny." And he was like, "That would be funny." So, what, if it happens in the next few seasons, that would be huge. So, put me in the background of your shit, dude.

• 44:08Speaker 06

  Yeah, right, bro. I'm gonna call, text you one day, "Hey, man, we got this part." "Yeah, fuck, sorry, homie, I'm doing tires."

• 44:13Andrew Santino?

  The first, the fir-

• 44:16Speaker 00

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• 44:46Speaker 01

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• 45:16Andrew Santino?

  The first background thing I ever did out here was for a Funny or Die sketch when I first moved here.

• 45:20Speaker 06

  Oh, crazy. Dude, I did a, a thing on Funny or Die, and, uh, it was like this, uh, Rush Hour 2 Face Off- No, Rush Hour 4 or Face Off 2, like-

• 45:30Andrew Santino?

  Like a combo?

• 45:31Speaker 06

  Fake trailer for like a movie, and it was, it was Diddy.

• 45:33Andrew Santino?

  No!

• 45:34Speaker 06

  P. Diddy and, uh, this, this famous Korean actor, I forget his name.

• 45:38Andrew Santino?

  Bobby Lee?

• 45:39Speaker 06

  John, something. No.

• 45:41Andrew Santino?

  Bong Jun Ho? Bong Jun Ho?

• 45:44Speaker 06

  Was it?

• 45:45Andrew Santino?

  Isn't that his name?

• 45:45Speaker 07

  No, it's Byung Hun Lee.

• 45:49Andrew Santino?

  Oh, Byung Hun Lee?

• 45:50Speaker 06

  Young Hun.

• 45:50Andrew Santino?

  Another three parter.

• 45:52Speaker 06

  And then I played this pedestrian where P Diddy and him almost run me over.

• 45:56Andrew Santino?

  No.

• 45:56Speaker 06

  And I'm like, yo, and I have a line. And then, yeah.

• 45:58Andrew Santino?

  Did you feel it back then? You even knew? The oil was real back then?

• 46:02Speaker 06

  Aw, dude.

• 46:02Andrew Santino?

  He didn't invite you?

• 46:03Speaker 06

  Well, dude, I have a-

• 46:03Andrew Santino?

  He's like, you look slippery.

• 46:04Speaker 06

  Yeah. Hey, you look slippery with me. I was like, I was like, really? Do I?

• 46:10Andrew Santino?

  Me? Who, me? Diddy?

• 46:11Speaker 06

  But no, I kicked it with him one New Years. Yep, there it is, dude.

• 46:14Andrew Santino?

  Damn, dog.

• 46:16Speaker 06

  That, he pulled that up quick, homie.

• 46:17Andrew Santino?

  That's crazy.

• 46:18Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 46:19Andrew Santino?

  You kicked it with him, though? You hung with Diddy?

• 46:20Speaker 06

  Well, no.

• 46:21Andrew Santino?

  So you guys heard it here first?

• 46:22Speaker 06

  When Cholo Fit went viral. And, you know, French Montana fell in love with Creeper, bro.

• 46:30Speaker 06

  Bro, he fell in love with Creeper. He was reposting my shit. And big boy from the radio station out here, he texts me just French Montana exclamation mark. And I'm like, what are you talking about? And then some other homies like start sending me French Montana's Instagram. And he's like reposting all the Creeper videos. Cut to that New Years and his people are like, yo, what are you doing? And I'm like, nothing. Like, hey, we're in Vegas. Like, we're gonna bring you out here. We're gonna surprise French Montana.

• 46:53Andrew Santino?

  No.

• 46:54Speaker 06

  And then just bring Creeper and shit. And I was like, what? So they have me, he's in the shower and he's got like this whole team getting him ready. He's performing at the club there at the Venetian. And then they bring me in the, in the suite. You know, he's got his whole team there, fucking entourage and shit. And then I'm like dressed as Creeper. And then they, they have me hide around the corner. And then he comes out. And they're like, alright, come on. And I come out, bro. We're just in the suite. And he's like, oh! And he's like, put sorry. He's like, I love it. I love it. And I'm just there like, eh.

• 47:22Andrew Santino?

  Did you go to the show with him or no?

• 47:23Speaker 06

  Dude, yes, bro. And then I was like, fuck him, I gotta be dressed as Creeper the whole night, you know? But then he's like, hey, you gonna come out with us? I go, yeah. He's like, alright, change up. You can leave your stuff here in my suite. I was like, alright, cool. And then the casino sends their security team to come get him and his entourage. And then they take you down to the tunnels. So you don't have to walk through the casino. And then we popped up in this din- in like this dining room. And it's DJ Khalid and and da da. They were like, oh, man, this is, uh, Cholo Fit. Dude's like, hey, Cholo Fit, you the best. And then like, we start eating. And then like halfway through, Diddy comes with his girl, Cassie at the time.

• 47:54Andrew Santino?

  Whoa, dark world.

• 47:57Speaker 06

  Dude, crazy, homie.

• 47:58Andrew Santino?

  That's crazy.

• 47:59Speaker 06

  He's like an intense personality for sure.

• 48:01Andrew Santino?

  Did he talk to you?

• 48:01Speaker 06

  He has to command the room. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was, I actually reminded of him that thing. I was like, oh, da da da. He was just like, yeah, cool. Like, you know, whatever. Like, you know.

• 48:10Andrew Santino?

  You don't remember that, Diddy?

• 48:11Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 48:12Andrew Santino?

  When we acted together?

• 48:15Speaker 06

  But, uh, but yeah, then we went before, and then we go pop into the club. It's all sold out, packed out. Before they walk in, there are people going, turn any alcohol bottle that they're not in business with. Like they saw it's not facing any cameras, so they're not seen next to it. Just like, you know, it's a business then being at the club even. And then they go out and do the songs, Diddy surprised the crowd, dah dah dah. And then they kept going and I was like, you know what? This is my time to get out. You know, they went to like this private other lounge in the Venetian and like, Wyclef Jean was there, Drake and fucking J Lo. That was around the time there was like rumors that J Lo and Drake were hooking up. They were there together and I was like, alright, you know what? This is my time to go. This is their life, not mine.

• 48:52Andrew Santino?

  That's your time to go?

• 48:54Speaker 06

  Go, homie, I just felt it. I was like, I don't want to like overstay.

• 48:57Andrew Santino?

  That's your time to turn up, dude. That's your time to go back to the suite, get the creeper outfit, come back all fucked up.

• 49:03Speaker 06

  Just like, hey, fuck it.

• 49:04Andrew Santino?

  Hey, what's up? Dude, that's a wild story. But you dipped out, you're like, I gotta go.

• 49:09Speaker 06

  Yeah, I was, you know, I, we kicked it for sure. I was there, you know, for a minute. And then, uh, yeah, but before we even went to the, to that other after after-party, we went back to the suite and then homie was, uh, you know, fools, we're fools are partying and then, and then, uh, like, like Diddy stood up on the coffee table like telling a story. He had, he's like command the room. You're just like, oh shit, crazy.

• 49:32Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, actually, I'm glad I left now, because who knows?

• 49:36Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, bro, everybody's zooming up.

• 49:39Speaker 06

  Check it out, I got an idea.

• 49:40Andrew Santino?

  Yeah. And everybody's like, yeah, we're in. It's like those people that missed their flights on 9/11. 9/11, yeah, same thing, you missed your, yeah.

• 49:46Speaker 06

  Oh shit, no, fuck.

• 49:47Andrew Santino?

  God bless, good, good thing you slept in.

• 49:48Speaker 03

  In here, we pour whiskey.

• 49:51Andrew Santino?

  Hey man, a lot of men experience ED. It's so normal, it's unbelievable. I know people are weird about it, uh, but 30 million men in the United States, give or take, who knows how many people are really coming forward about it. They experience it and it's not that big of a deal, because through Hims you can access personalized prescription treatment, options for ED like Hard Mints and Sex RX, plus Climax Control if you're prescribed. They offer all sorts of ED treatment options, okay? Trusted generics that cost 95% less than the brand name ones, uh, Hard Mints if they're prescribed. To go out of your way, alright, to get this help and feel like yourself. Hims is there for you. You know Hims, you've heard about them before. They provide all sorts of men's health care for you. Think of Hims as your digital front door. They get you back to your old self with simple 100% done online.

• 50:33Andrew Santino?

  Trusted, trusted treatments for ED and much, much more. And they're all done in one place. Okay, I know so many friends of mine that have trusted it. I'm lucky that I don't have to use it, but I'm telling you, I'm a big supporter of Hims helping out my boys. To get simple online access to personalized, affordable care for ED, hair loss, weight loss and much, much more. Visit hims.com/whiskey. That's hims.com/whiskey for your free online visit. Hims.com/whiskey. Actual price will depend on product and subscription plan. Featured products include compounded drug products, which the FDA does not approve or verify for safety, effectiveness or quality. Prescription required. See website for details, restrictions and important safety information.

• 51:13Andrew Santino?

  Who was it?

• 51:14Speaker 06

  Could have been.

• 51:14Speaker 07

  Seth MacFarlane.

• 51:15Andrew Santino?

  Seth MacFarlane, right? Was supposed to be in one of the planes on 9/11. You know that?

• 51:18Speaker 06

  Oh, really?

• 51:19Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, it's a true story. He was supposed to board Boston to whatever, right? Wasn't that him?

• 51:24Speaker 06

  Damn, that's crazy.

• 51:26Andrew Santino?

  Illuminati, bro. Illuminati. Somebody sent him a text. Do not fly today. I've had that a few times where I'm like, should I not fly today? Everything feels like it's going wrong, you know? Did you see that plane? Did you see that Delta plane that they? They had to, uh... It went sideways and they had to make an emergency... I feel like the emergency landed in Minnesota.

• 51:47Speaker 07

  North Dakota.

• 51:47Andrew Santino?

  North Dakota. Close! That's really close and they had to fucking land there. Cause the plane went sideways. 25 people got injured. They like broke bones and shit.

• 51:57Speaker 06

  What?

• 51:57Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, it was crazy.

• 51:58Speaker 07

  They were trying to avoid a mid-air collision with a B-52 bomber.

• 52:01Andrew Santino?

  A B-52 bomber was ripping through the sky and they had to go sideways to not smash into it.

• 52:07Speaker 06

  What the...? What was the bomber's deal?

• 52:10Andrew Santino?

  He's just chilling. Just ripping through the... I don't... They don't know... Well, they haven't released what it was, right? I don't think they told the full story. But I think about that all the time that I'm like, there's a lot of planes in airspace, dude. We travel all the time. I'm like, please, God, keep me safe.

• 52:22Speaker 06

  I was, I was traveling with Craig one time, Craig Robinson. You know, I was hosting for him for like six years, but, uh, you know, he's taking a lot more flights than me. But we're on planes all the time. I mean, I've been now, you know, it never stops. It's like fuck, man. Um, I remember I was so excited the first time somebody put me on a plane to do comedy, you know? Now I'm like, fuck, I gotta go back to the airport, man.

• 52:42Andrew Santino?

  I hate it, bro. I hate it. There's no good way.

• 52:45Speaker 06

  We hit a, you ever hit a static wall?

• 52:47Andrew Santino?

  No, I don't know what that is.

• 52:48Speaker 06

  Oh my god, bro. I didn't know what it was either, right? So, we're flying and all of a sudden the plane, and then two big old white flashes on both sides. Boom, you know?

• 52:59Andrew Santino?

  Whoa.

• 53:00Speaker 06

  Dude, the girl next to me didn't say, you know, I haven't, never met her, not that she just sitting next to me. She grabs my hand like that, boom, and everybody's like freaking the fuck out. Everybody on the plane.

• 53:08Andrew Santino?

  Did the plane shake or was it just a loud noise?

• 53:10Speaker 06

  No, it was like a boom, yeah, like a, like a jolt. And then you see the flashes. I'm like, the engines exploded, we're going down, this is it, thousand percent.

• 53:17Andrew Santino?

  What the fuck?

• 53:17Speaker 06

  And then this girl grabs my hand, she's squeezing my hand hard, homie, and duh, duh, duh. And then like Craig sitting right in front of me, and then, uh...

• 53:24Andrew Santino?

  He starts playing the piano.

• 53:26Speaker 06

  But dude, we were like, and then like, and then all of a sudden we're like not going down. And then the, the stewardess gets up, she's like, everybody calm down, it's okay. We hit something, what you call a static wall.

• 53:36Andrew Santino?

  Static wall? Explain this to me, cause I've never heard of this in my entire fucking life.

• 53:40Speaker 06

  What? We hit like a static wall? I guess it's like a static wall that you could fly through and just, and then you gotta just break through it.

• 53:46Andrew Santino?

  You gotta break through it, like it's a, some sort of weather pattern.

• 53:49Speaker 07

  It says it's a, it's static electricity buildup from friction within the air.

• 53:52Speaker 06

  There you go, homie.

• 53:53Andrew Santino?

  Wow, static electricity buildup of friction in the air, and you just smash into it. That's creepy as fuck.

• 53:58Speaker 06

  Dude, homie, I was like, that was the scariest experience. You know turbulence is like, you know the statistics on turbulence, they don't cause crashes?

• 54:04Andrew Santino?

  They don't crash, yeah.

• 54:05Speaker 06

  So it's like, I don't really trip off that, but you hit the air pockets and land, those kinda get crazy.

• 54:09Andrew Santino?

  That I hate.

• 54:10Speaker 06

  But yeah, yeah, but that static wall shit, boy, oof.

• 54:12Andrew Santino?

  Well, all that shit's getting weirder in a, in aerospace. The day, we, didn't we just try to bomb, so we tried to shoot something out of the sky and it was, uh, bounced right off of it?

• 54:20Speaker 07

  I did see that.

• 54:20Andrew Santino?

  What did it turn out to be? Do you know?

• 54:22Speaker 07

  I don't think they've released, it's some kind of a UFO.

• 54:24Speaker 06

  No.

• 54:25Andrew Santino?

  You're not paying attention, dog. They think it was a UFO, but they tried to shoot at it.

• 54:28Speaker 06

  They tried to shoot it and then it bounced off of it. Yeah, and then it, yeah, that's a UFO, man.

• 54:31Andrew Santino?

  What the fuck else could that be, bro? That's insane. And, and by the way, what are they waiting for? Get it over with, boys.

• 54:36Speaker 06

  Yeah, just come on.

• 54:37Andrew Santino?

  If you're gonna come down, come on down.

• 54:38Speaker 06

  We all know.

• 54:39Andrew Santino?

  No, honestly.

• 54:39Speaker 06

  Or just to tell, the government just tell us, like, alright.

• 54:42Andrew Santino?

  Well, they know. Well, that's why I said, every, this is what's, the, the world is so dark and weird right now. I mean, shit's fucked up, but I will say... We tell them that we know the truth and they say, "No, no, no, no." Then finally, they admit it. And then we don't care. Isn't that weird?

• 54:57Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah.

• 54:57Andrew Santino?

  That will be like, "Hey, man, we know there's aliens." They're like, "There's no fucking aliens." And then 20 years later, they're like, "There's aliens."

• 55:03Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 55:04Andrew Santino?

  But by that time, we're like, "Whatever."

• 55:05Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 55:06Andrew Santino?

  Like, you're over the, you're over the fight.

• 55:07Speaker 06

  The drama of it, yeah, yeah.

• 55:08Andrew Santino?

  It's almost like if you get in a fight with your girl or something and at some point, even if you were right, it's over, so she's like... You feel bad that you fought, so you're like, "Whatever, it's fine, I don't care."

• 55:19Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 55:19Andrew Santino?

  I don't even give a shit.

• 55:20Speaker 06

  That's classic, our society too is like that with the drama of like when somebody's trying to hide something, but when they come out and apologize, then it's just like...

• 55:26Andrew Santino?

  Alright.

• 55:27Speaker 06

  Alright.

• 55:28Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, that's...

• 55:28Speaker 06

  Charlie Sheen, bro, he's like, "Yeah."

• 55:30Andrew Santino?

  We just talked about this at lunch.

• 55:31Speaker 06

  Smoke crack and fuck dudes, and they're like, "Alright."

• 55:33Andrew Santino?

  Isn't that wild, dude? Well, also, when they were like, "He got HIV," he didn't even know, this is how young he is, he didn't know, I said, "Well, yeah, because he had HIV," and he goes, "Charlie Sheen, what?" And I was like, "What? That was like a huge..."

• 55:43Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 55:43Andrew Santino?

  A huge news story.

• 55:44Speaker 06

  Well, it only came out because he was partying with people that saw his medication, they took pictures of it.

• 55:48Andrew Santino?

  The girls, and they blackmailed him.

• 55:49Speaker 06

  And they blackmailed him, dude.

• 55:51Andrew Santino?

  He said he never got a blackmail for, for less than a half a million dollars a clip.

• 55:54Speaker 06

  He's like, "That was getting off cheap."

• 55:56Andrew Santino?

  Half a million?

• 55:57Speaker 06

  One of them was 1.4 million.

• 55:58Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, 1.5, yeah. Because they were taking pictures of AIDS medication, HIV medication, and he didn't want it out there. But at that point, it's like, "Let him be," you're smoking crack. Let them blow up your spot, who gives a shit, dude?

• 56:12Speaker 07

  He had such a perfect public image to maintain.

• 56:14Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, exactly, yeah, like, he was such a good, good, good, good old boy.

• 56:17Speaker 06

  I know, right, yeah.

• 56:17Andrew Santino?

  Well, no, he, his drug dealer was on the documentary, which I thought was the wildest shit because his drug, they like got the drug dealer on there.

• 56:23Speaker 06

  He had like his belly out, like his shirt's all up here, he's like, "Yeah, man, I love that motherfucker, man, we party, we have fun," and just like, like...

• 56:30Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, dude, of course you do, you smoked rock with him all day.

• 56:32Speaker 06

  But then the drug counselor got with the drug dealer, and they, he slowly cooked the, the crack with less and less coke in it.

• 56:40Andrew Santino?

  That's crazy.

• 56:40Speaker 06

  And that's how he got sober, like, right, so his drug dealer gets sober.

• 56:44Andrew Santino?

  His drug dealer got him sober. But the drug dealer with, you know, the counselor was like, but this week, let's go back again, just for one more time. Just to extend the life of it, you know what I mean? He's trying to cut the half-life down a little bit. It was a wild documentary to watch, because it it just, it's sad that like when someone gets a lot of money and power when they're young. What it does to your fucking head, and then when you have dips in the business, people come back. You gotta be careful.

• 57:05Speaker 06

  He was making like 2 million an episode. That's crazy.

• 57:07Andrew Santino?

  Bro, I think we did the math. He did 40, he got 44 million in 2 years on Two and a Half Men. And I just went like this. I just went 4 for some reason. 44 million in 2 years on Two and a Half Men, and those final years before Ashton Kutcher replaced him or something.

• 57:20Speaker 07

  They did something really interesting with his show, Anger Management, that came out after his, whatever. The second, the second season has 80 episodes in it.

• 57:28Andrew Santino?

  Well, because they want to get the syndication. Yeah, it was genius.

• 57:30Speaker 07

  That's crazy. I've never heard of a show doing that.

• 57:32Andrew Santino?

  So he bought, they bought the syndication, like they paid into getting the syndication fast, so they could have it be, you know, they wanted syndication, so they basically scheduled it, so they did so many episodes so fast, so they couldn't cancel it before they got into syndication. It was brilliant.

• 57:45Speaker 07

  Wow.

• 57:46Andrew Santino?

  Season 1, 10 episodes. Season 2, 90 episodes. Genius.

• 57:51Andrew Santino?

  It's actually, it's actually fucking genius.

• 57:53Speaker 07

  Yeah, they still did it in a year or two, or like 2 years.

• 57:55Andrew Santino?

  Of course. Well, that's the Tyler Perry way, where it's like, get it done, get it done, get it done. Then they can't say no. Shout out to Charlie Sheen for really putting in the work. Smoking those rocks. You ever smoke rock?

• 58:05Speaker 06

  Yep.

• 58:06Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, did you like it?

• 58:07Speaker 06

  I didn't like it as much as it was hyped up to be.

• 58:09Andrew Santino?

  Right. You like, right, you were blowing lines over rock.

• 58:11Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, for sure.

• 58:12Andrew Santino?

  It was way more fun, huh?

• 58:13Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 58:14Andrew Santino?

  Why, what do you say it's not hyped, it's not what it's hyped up to be?

• 58:16Speaker 06

  I don't know. Maybe it's because I was already partying on other drugs when I, when I did it, but you know, when people talk about that first time they smoke crack, they're like, oh, right when you exhale that, that cloud is just, oh, you know? And I didn't, I didn't have that feeling. Maybe, you know, I felt something, but I was just like, eh.

• 58:31Andrew Santino?

  Not like that.

• 58:32Speaker 06

  And then you're like, you're smoking crack, homie.

• 58:36Speaker 06

  So it's like, I don't want, I don't want, I don't want that to be a thing, you know?

• 58:40Andrew Santino?

  It's funny, there's a stigma to smoking crack. It's so heavily in society that you're like, it's crack. I don't know smoking crack, dude. It's not so crazy different from coke, where you're like, I don't smoke, I don't want to smoke, I'm not a crack guy, I'm a coke guy, dude.

• 58:55Speaker 06

  Like cocaine is more of a high-class drug.

• 58:56Andrew Santino?

  It is. What's the, what's the wildest shit you got on? What's like the craziest shit you got on?

• 59:01Speaker 06

  I don't know. Probably, probably meth.

• 59:03Andrew Santino?

  Meth was nuts, huh?

• 59:04Speaker 06

  Meth and, you know, I've, I've mixed like, uh, uh, coke, MDMA and ketamine together and railed that.

• 59:14Speaker 06

  And then uh

• 59:14Andrew Santino?

  What's that like, bro? That's, that's gotta be a lot.

• 59:18Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, it's pretty crazy.

• 59:19Andrew Santino?

  That's heavy as shit.

• 59:24Andrew Santino?

  Tweaking hard, dude.

• 59:26Speaker 06

  But you're kinda leveled out, but it's still tweaking at the same time?

• 59:29Andrew Santino?

  Would you smoke meth, snort meth?

• 59:30Speaker 06

  Uh, I've done both, yeah.

• 59:33Andrew Santino?

  Which one was the one that was like?

• 59:35Speaker 06

  Thank God, thankfully, meth never got me like that.

• 59:38Andrew Santino?

  It didn't stick.

• 59:39Speaker 06

  I've had homies get on that shit and their life is ruined within a year, you know?

• 59:42Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, meth is maybe the darkest drug.

• 59:43Speaker 06

  But I've also had homies who did it, you know, a little bit, little by little, like, you know, snorted a little line.

• 59:49Andrew Santino?

  Like functioning?

• 59:50Speaker 06

  Dude, my uncle, rest in peace, my Theo, but uh, one of my uncles, I got a lot, but uh, he uh, he was in his seventies, bro. He would snort one little line of meth every morning.

• 1:00:00Andrew Santino?

  What?

• 1:00:00Speaker 06

  And just handle his shit around the house, take care of his wife.

• 1:00:03Andrew Santino?

  Really?

• 1:00:04Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:00:04Andrew Santino?

  Functioning on meth?

• 1:00:05Speaker 06

  Function, you know what I mean? Yeah.

• 1:00:06Andrew Santino?

  Wow, dude. Well, what, how'd he die?

• 1:00:09Speaker 06

  Uh, uh, cancer, yeah, but.

• 1:00:12Andrew Santino?

  Oh, fuck. I was about to be like, meth? Did the meth get him? Cancer got him. See that kid's cancer's gonna get you before meth.

• 1:00:19Speaker 06

  But like, and I think the cancer only got him because his wife passed away and he kinda just.

• 1:00:23Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, that's what they say, right?

• 1:00:24Speaker 06

  Yeah, you just let go after that.

• 1:00:25Andrew Santino?

  Or death by heartbreak or something like that. There's some weird statistic, I don't know, you have to look this up, about when people's spouses die, how quickly they die after, because you can die of a broken heart, like in the sense that you give up on life, so your body just.

• 1:00:38Speaker 06

  Yeah, your body shuts down. The mind is a powerful thing, yeah, you're just like, I'm gonna go with that fool.

• 1:00:42Andrew Santino?

  You're like, I'm out, fuck this. I don't wanna do this anymore. You gotta look up the stat on that, because I wanna know what that is. My grandmother was like that at the very end, she was very sad, because my grandfather died much before her. But she was so sad about it, man.

• 1:00:53Speaker 07

  It's called widowhood effect. Studies showing a significant rise in death rates, especially from cardiovascular disease, in the first six months to a year after a spouse's death.

• 1:01:01Andrew Santino?

  Six months to a year, that's broken heart, dude.

• 1:01:03Speaker 06

  Broken heart.

• 1:01:04Andrew Santino?

  That is what it is, man. It's like, you, your heart just goes, are we out? And you're like, we're out. Fuck that. Dude, I learned something the other day on the internet too, from this one. There's this doctor that pops up all the time on my feed, and he's like, do you know why we do CPR? And I thought, give me your guess of why we do CPR. Do you know? Give it a guess.

• 1:01:25Speaker 00

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• 1:01:55Speaker 01

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• 1:02:25Speaker 06

  To bring the heart back to life.

• 1:02:26Andrew Santino?

  Okay, what do you think?

• 1:02:27Speaker 07

  Yeah, to get the bumps.

• 1:02:29Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 1:02:29Speaker 07

  Pump the blood out.

• 1:02:31Andrew Santino?

  Okay, so you're close. You're closer. So it's not to bring the heart back to life. This is crazy. He said, "Most of the time for CPR, we find that the heart is no longer beating." So you're clinically dead, right? You're technically dead. And they're like, "You're not doing that to try to save..." I'm sorry, you're not doing that to try to like, bring the heart back? Because EMTs need to be able to do that, right? You probably need shocks and stuff. He said, "It's because the heart will still have blood in it, and you're pushing blood out to get it to organs so you keep the organs alive." So technically, it's just to keep blood moving and flowing to keep all these organs still flowing with blood. Because you're not going to be able to re... You can't... You're not going to be able to re-jump the heart by doing that. It's just to get blood to the organs continuously

• 1:03:16Andrew Santino?

  and have blood keep flowing out to the body. So he's like, "You're not going to get to the heart." He's like, "You're just buying the organs time till the paramedics get there." Which is what he said. He could be wrong, but it sounded fascinating. Because he was like, "You're not going to jump..." Start the heart. He's like, they need something else for that. But he goes, but you can keep the flow of blood that's going, moving out.

• 1:03:34Speaker 06

  Interesting.

• 1:03:34Andrew Santino?

  I saw a guy get CPR one time and I, I was the wildest shit I've ever seen because I thought for sure he was dead. But, I mean, I don't even, well, I guess I don't really know because given this, it sounded like maybe he wasn't. But I saw this woman giving this guy CPR to a restaurant and I thought, how crazy is that? That if he does die, then she's like, well, I didn't save him. Do you know what I mean? Oh, it'd fuck up my head so hard. Like when they taught us, like one of my high school jobs was lifeguarding. And they taught us all, you know, we had to take CPR. And the whole time I was doing it, I thought, God, I hope I never have to fucking do this. I don't ever want to have to do this shit.

• 1:04:09Andrew Santino?

  And they're wet, everyone's wet. That's the other thing, you're like soaking wet, you're in a pool, you gotta drag someone out of a pool. Like maybe the worst fucking version of it in the world. CPR in a fucking pool. And I, I had, I had at night, I had the old people. So I hated doing the night shift because I had to do the old, and the old folks, I'd be watching like a fucking hawk. Because I was like, they're the first ones to be like, you know, you know what I mean? And I have to jump in. Some old motherfucker. No, I'm kidding. Now, I had a bu- I had a ton of little shitty jo- little tiny shitty jobs. Like, you know, not shitty jobs, just a ton of little jobs that I just couldn't. That's the thing about comics. I feel like when you said that you were digging ditches, that you're like. You just know, you know, it's not, it's not going to satisfy your brain. It's not, nothing wrong with the job, it's just.

• 1:04:52Andrew Santino?

  You know, it's going to make you more unhappy because you're like, I need to do something. I need to put something out, man. I need to do a thing, you know? You have to.

• 1:05:00Speaker 06

  When I was, even when I, you know, that, I did a little bit, like when I was doing that warehouse job at the shipping agency, I was doing some tech support. We were like a startup company. And I was doing alright, like financially, but I was just like depressed, bro.

• 1:05:15Speaker 06

  You know, these carpets and walls all day. I'm just like, yeah.

• 1:05:18Andrew Santino?

  It's hard. Some people know, can function on it.

• 1:05:20Speaker 06

  Yeah, some people thrive in that environment. Like, I'm not knocking it.

• 1:05:24Andrew Santino?

  I get nervous, I get anxious. I feel like I'm never, it's like, and I, yeah, and the cycle makes me more depressed. You know, like there's a lot of comics you've had, like Fahim was a fucking, uh, engineer.

• 1:05:35Speaker 06

  I know dude, he's smart, bro.

• 1:05:37Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, I know, I was like, I was like, go back to doing that, dude. No, I'm kidding. He's a great comic.

• 1:05:42Speaker 06

  He's not that smart, if he's still doing comedy, no, I'm just kidding, I'm just kidding.

• 1:05:44Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, he must be kind of a fucking idiot. But he's a great comic, he's a great comic, but there was a lot of comics that had great, like, real jobs. I never had a job where I thought I could be good enough to do it and make a living. Isn't that fucking scary shit? So what are we gonna do if it doesn't work out? If AI takes over, what's next? What are we doing? We're fucked.

• 1:06:02Speaker 06

  Yeah, I don't know.

• 1:06:03Andrew Santino?

  Please, please come see us live.

• 1:06:06Speaker 06

  Please watch my special.

• 1:06:07Andrew Santino?

  Please watch his special, please watch his special on Hulu.

• 1:06:10Speaker 06

  Watch our specials.

• 1:06:10Andrew Santino?

  Watch our specials, watch them back to back. They probably will put them back to back. If you log into Hulu, I bet you it'll be like, if you like this, you like this and this, and they put you in like the row or whatever.

• 1:06:19Speaker 06

  They're homies, I swear.

• 1:06:20Andrew Santino?

  These guys are homies. How many specials is this for you? How many is this?

• 1:06:24Speaker 06

  This is the first one, man.

• 1:06:25Andrew Santino?

  Your first full hour?

• 1:06:26Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:06:26Andrew Santino?

  Have you done, did you do a half hour or anything?

• 1:06:27Speaker 06

  I did a half hour before on HBO, years ago. It was kind of like a variety half hour thing, it was pretty cool, but this is like the first, like...

• 1:06:36Andrew Santino?

  This is the first deal?

• 1:06:36Speaker 06

  First deal, yeah.

• 1:06:37Andrew Santino?

  That's huge, man. Congratulations.

• 1:06:39Speaker 06

  Thank you, man.

• 1:06:39Andrew Santino?

  It feels, it feels like a big achievement, right?

• 1:06:41Speaker 06

  Yeah, I'm just wobbling like, fa- finally, alright, cool, you know?

• 1:06:44Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:06:45Speaker 06

  It's good, and it's like you said, it's good to get rid of that, a lot of that material.

• 1:06:48Andrew Santino?

  Get the material gone.

• 1:06:49Speaker 06

  Some of the, I mean, a lot of the material is pretty fresh, but a lot of it was like, alright, let me just...

• 1:06:53Andrew Santino?

  You're doing a bunch of OJ jokes and shit? He's like, it's fresh, I'm doing all OJ jokes.

• 1:06:58Speaker 06

  You remember OJ, right, guys? You think you did it?

• 1:07:01Andrew Santino?

  I say that, someone else has got OJ jokes out right now.

• 1:07:04Speaker 07

  This is kind of related to what you talked about. I looked up other comedians with real jobs before they did comedy. Do you know Wanda, what, Wanda Sykes?

• 1:07:12Andrew Santino?

  Wanda Sykes, um, some, I feel like I do know this, Wanda Sykes, uh...

• 1:07:19Andrew Santino?

  Oh, I feel like I heard this before!

• 1:07:20Speaker 06

  Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, she?

• 1:07:21Speaker 07

  It's actually kind of relevant to the holiday we just had.

• 1:07:25Andrew Santino?

  Wanda Sykes, was this, she, she was, what, air traffic control, what the fuck? What did she do?

• 1:07:28Speaker 07

  She worked for the NSA.

• 1:07:30Andrew Santino?

  She worked for the NSA?

• 1:07:31Speaker 07

  Yeah, she, she was a procurement specialist.

• 1:07:36Andrew Santino?

  A procurement specialist in the NSA?

• 1:07:37Speaker 07

  Bought items like microphones and listening devices before moving to New York to pursue comedy and acting.

• 1:07:41Speaker 06

  Wow.

• 1:07:43Andrew Santino?

  That's fucking wild, dude. She's funny as fuck.

• 1:07:46Speaker 06

  Aw dude, she's hilarious, bro.

• 1:07:48Andrew Santino?

  That is kinda wild, though. Well, that just goes to show you that these are intelligent people that also loved comedy. I'm an idiot who liked comedy. I had no other, there was nowhere I could go. There was no like job I could, you know what I mean?

• 1:08:00Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:08:01Andrew Santino?

  My job's out here, I was working in the music industry, doing visas and shit. I was fucking, I was doing, I was doing paper pushing stuff, just trying to get through so I could do the day job and then go out at night and do shows, man.

• 1:08:11Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:08:12Andrew Santino?

  Tough, you know, well, it worked out. Look at us now.

• 1:08:16Speaker 06

  Thank God.

• 1:08:17Andrew Santino?

  Thank God is fucking right.

• 1:08:18Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:08:19Andrew Santino?

  Um, listen, I love you. I appreciate you. I respect you. You're one of the funniest dudes I know. Uh, go watch the special right now on Hulu, please.

• 1:08:28Speaker 06

  On the Hulus.

• 1:08:29Andrew Santino?

  Uh, and go see, uh, go see my boy live, uh, on tour. What's your website? What's your website?

• 1:08:33Speaker 06

  Frankie Quinones dot com.

• 1:08:35Andrew Santino?

  Frankie Quinones dot com.

• 1:08:36Speaker 06

  That's a hard one, but if you just Google Frankie Q.

• 1:08:38Andrew Santino?

  Frankie Q, it'll-

• 1:08:39Speaker 06

  That little wormy will come up for you.

• 1:08:40Andrew Santino?

  It'll populate. I'm glad you didn't get a Hollywood name and change it, you know?

• 1:08:44Speaker 06

  I know, right?

• 1:08:45Andrew Santino?

  Actually Frankie Q would've worked just fine.

• 1:08:47Speaker 06

  Dude, in the beginning, bro, I mean, you know, obviously I'm coming up on 20 years, but, uh, I remember in the beginning, people always tell me that, "You should come up with a stage name, you know, cause you know, Quinones, you can't, you know." I'm like, nah, man. That's my name, bro.

• 1:08:59Andrew Santino?

  That's you. No, that's you. Also, it's got a great ring to it, too. And there's no one else in the business with any, no one, there's no other Quinones in the game, right?

• 1:09:06Speaker 06

  Uh, there's, people always think I'm related to John Quinones, you know, that dude, "What would you do?"

• 1:09:11Andrew Santino?

  Oh, yeah, dude, I forgot about that guy.

• 1:09:14Speaker 06

  Dude, those fools like spreading rumors online, like, "Yeah, this is how he got into the business, his dad," and like, you know, I was like, what? He has a connects, and I was like, what the fuck, bro?

• 1:09:23Andrew Santino?

  You know what, dude, to be honest, you should lean into it for fun and do a sketch with him. You know what I mean?

• 1:09:28Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:09:29Andrew Santino?

  You should do a sketch with him where you're like, "Dad, I just need an audition." And he's like, "You've gotta do it on your own." You know what I'm saying? He's very like broadcast voice.

• 1:09:35Speaker 06

  Right, right. I'm not gonna use my connects.

• 1:09:37Andrew Santino?

  Bro, that's your, if that's your dad, you look nothing like that motherfucker. He's a big dude. What's his, look that dude, what's his background? He looks like an ex-football player, like an ex-college football player. He's a big fucking dude. John Quinones.

• 1:09:50Speaker 06

  But you know the first-

• 1:09:51Andrew Santino?

  He was a journalist.

• 1:09:52Speaker 07

  School of Journalism at Columbia.

• 1:09:53Andrew Santino?

  That's it, huh?

• 1:09:54Speaker 06

  Oh, there you go.

• 1:09:54Speaker 07

  News correspondent for 2020 Nightly.

• 1:09:55Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, he does feel like a news correspondent.

• 1:09:57Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah. But, uh, Tisha Campbell, dude. She was like the first, my first little TV spot was like on Nickelodeon, like, uh, I don't know, probably fifteen years ago or something, but... She was like Frankie, looking for me in the green room. I'm like, "Yeah, what's up?" "Hey, Tisha," like, I was just like, "Oh," kinda little starstruck. She's like, "How do I say your name?" And I was like, "Quinones." She goes, "Oh, all you, all you had to give me was like, 'Yo, baby, we got this, Quinones.'" And I was like, "Oh, shit." And so now when I tell people how to say it, I'm like, "Quinones."

• 1:10:23Andrew Santino?

  Oh, that's really great, actually. John Quinones is like, "Don't say it like that." "That's not how we say it on broadcast journalism."

• 1:10:31Speaker 06

  "You sound just like him."

• 1:10:33Andrew Santino?

  Think about that, dude. I want you to do a sketch with him. That'd be funny as, right, though? Wouldn't that be funny as fuck? If you do like a behind-the-scenes shit where you're like, "Dad, help me out." And he's like a real asshole to you. Get it on your own, bitch. I gotta go do another What Would You Do and make a million dollars. Alright, go see my boy. I appreciate you. Uh, we end the show the same way. Look into that camera, say one word or one phrase to end the episode.

• 1:10:53Speaker 06

  Uh, eh, positive vibes.

• 1:10:55Speaker 03

  In here, we pour whiskey. Whiskey, whiskey, whiskey, whiskey.

• 1:11:01Speaker 04

  Who was that creature in the ginger beard? Sturdy and ginger.

• 1:11:05Speaker 05

  Like that, huh? The ginger gene is a curse. Gingers are fugitives. You owe me five dollars for the whiskey, seventy-five dollars for the horse. Ginger? Aw, hell no. This whiskey is excellent.

• 1:11:16Speaker 04

  Ginger. I like gingers.