Ep 257: Roy Wood Jr.

Roy Wood Jr. joins Mark and Sam for a killer episode packed with road stories, comedy history, and hard-earned wisdom. The guys swap tales about bombing on Star Search, opening for Ron White, taking a private jet with Adam Sandler, and what really happens when you accidentally use the headliner’s bathroom. Roy breaks down life after The Daily Show, the future of stand-up specials, and lessons learned from his dad, his peers, and decades in the game. Sponsored by: Start your one-dollar-per-month trial and start selling today at https://shopify.com/drunk Ditch the cigarettes and vapes — grab some nicotine-infused toothpicks at https://zippixtoothpicks.com and get 10% off with code WMBD Subscribe to We Might Be Drunk: https://bit.ly/SubscribeToWMBD Merch: https://wemightbedrunkpod.com Clips Channel: https://bit.ly/WMBDClips Sam Morril: https://punchup.live/sammorril/tickets Mark Normand: https://punchup.live/marknormand/tickets Produced by Gotham Production Studios: https://www.gothamproductionstudios.com @GothamProductionStudios | Producer: https://www.instagram.com/mrmatthewpeters #WeMightBeDrunk #MarkNormand #SamMorril #RoyWoodJr #Shopify #ZippixToothpicks #ComedyPodcast #StandUpComedy #bodegacatwhiskey 00:00 Welcome Back & Comedy Recap 02:00 Canadian Tour Stories & Comedy Scenes 05:00 Comedy Clubs, Taping, and Old School Touring 11:00 Arena Tours & Touring with Sandler 18:00 Hoops at Under Armour & Tour Perks 25:00 Comedy Roasts: Culture and Legends 32:00 Roast Dynamics in Black & Mainstream Comedy 40:00 Comedy Specials, Industry vs. Internet 47:00 DIY Specials & Releasing Content Today 55:00 Changing Technology & Audience Building 01:02:00 Evolving Material & Reaching New Fans 01:11:00 Comedy Museums & Immortalizing Legends Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:06Sam Morril?

  Boom.

• 0:07Mark Normand?

  Swish.

• 0:08Sam Morril?

  Here we are.

• 0:08Mark Normand?

  Hey, hey, folks.

• 0:09Sam Morril?

  Good to be back.

• 0:10Mark Normand?

  We might be drunk. We're here. We're queer.

• 0:12Sam Morril?

  You go hard this weekend?

• 0:14Mark Normand?

  Uh, not really, actually. I had DeVito opening and, uh, he was taking it easy, so I kinda took it easy, but...

• 0:20Sam Morril?

  He usually will grab a tequila soda or some drink. He's usually drinking something when I'm with him.

• 0:25Mark Normand?

  I got him a few and he was like, "I'm good." Like, he had two and I noticed he was falling asleep every night. So I was like, "All right, we should go home." And when you guys start doing this one, I'm like, "All right."

• 0:34Sam Morril?

  He's the driver, too. God damn it.

• 0:36Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 0:37Sam Morril?

  Damn.

• 0:37Mark Normand?

  We had a great weekend in Canada.

• 0:39Sam Morril?

  Where'd you hit?

• 0:40Mark Normand?

  We did Halifax. Hidden gem.

• 0:42Sam Morril?

  Wow, I don't think I've ever been.

• 0:44Mark Normand?

  Great town. It's one of those towns like, "Thanks for coming. Nobody comes here." Cute, beach town, lobster, water, great.

• 0:51Sam Morril?

  I heard it's great.

• 0:52Mark Normand?

  Great. And it's like an hour and a half flight. It's totally doable. Like, this should be more comedy.

• 0:57Sam Morril?

  Over Scotia.

• 0:58Mark Normand?

  That's it.

• 0:59Sam Morril?

  That's salmon, baby.

• 1:00Mark Normand?

  New Canada. Or New Scotland, is what that means. And, uh, yeah, look at that. Just like beautiful riverfront views and water.

• 1:07Sam Morril?

  That looks like Portland, Maine. That's insane.

• 1:09Mark Normand?

  It's very similar to Maine without the heroin.

• 1:12Sam Morril?

  There's gotta be some heroin in Halifax.

• 1:15Mark Normand?

  Probably a little heroin.

• 1:16Sam Morril?

  A little heroin. In Portland, Maine, it's fucking dicey, dude. And the booze.

• 1:19Mark Normand?

  Oh, my god. Yeah, Maine is hillbilly north.

• 1:22Sam Morril?

  Not to mention, they're like lobster Hitler out there. It's like, literally just like, every fucking block, they're rounding them up.

• 1:29Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 1:29Sam Morril?

  It's crazy. They're just...

• 1:30Mark Normand?

  That's true.

• 1:31Sam Morril?

  They're like, "We got them here." You're like, "All right, Jesus Christ."

• 1:33Mark Normand?

  Yeah, that's true. It's a genocide.

• 1:35Sam Morril?

  Yeah, they're dumping them in, the little fucking, uh, and they're making merch out of it.

• 1:39Mark Normand?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:40Sam Morril?

  Not only they're dumping them in, but they're fucking, they're merching every store. It's like, "Get a lobster t-shirt, too."

• 1:44Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 1:45Sam Morril?

  Aren't we rubbing it in?

• 1:46Mark Normand?

  And you pick your lobster to eat, which is also pretty brutal.

• 1:49Sam Morril?

  That was a great Richard Jenny joke. You know the joke I'm talking about? Where you go to the seafood restaurant and you see the tank full of lobsters and they all have that same look like... Any word from the governor? It's a great bit.

• 1:59Mark Normand?

  Oh, that's great.

• 2:00Sam Morril?

  Richard Jenny was great.

• 2:02Mark Normand?

  He was underrated. Killer.

• 2:03Sam Morril?

  So funny, dude.

• 2:04Mark Normand?

  Check out, uh, Plat- is it Platypus?

• 2:06Sam Morril?

  He, uh, all his shit's great, dude.

• 2:08Mark Normand?

  Platypus.

• 2:08Sam Morril?

  I mean, I listened to an album recently and it was like, he, his opening line was great, too. It was like, uh, "I've, I've a, I have a easy job." Not the easiest job, it's pretty easy. Easiest job, it was when Michael Jackson was in the trial. The lawyer against Michael Jackson, that guy, all he used to do is go up against, uh, MJ and create reasonable doubt. I'm, I'm paraphrasing, I'm butchering the wording, but like, great open, just like, get right into it.

• 2:31Mark Normand?

  Yeah, yeah. I, I told you, my favorite, uh, every time I try to bang my wife in the ass, she turns into Elvis. "Ho! Hey! Ho!" "Thank you very much."

• 2:39Sam Morril?

  He's, he was a underrated comic, man.

• 2:41Mark Normand?

  He did commentary, and he was silly, and he had huge act outs and great takes. He was great.

• 2:46Sam Morril?

  Yeah, he was, he was so- and it was like, uh, like, he had like a bit of Carlin where it was written.

• 2:51Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 2:52Sam Morril?

  And it was like, the word choice was important, but then it was also like, gr- great performer.

• 2:56Mark Normand?

  Great.

• 2:57Sam Morril?

  A little Robin Williams, too.

• 2:58Mark Normand?

  Yeah, yeah, definitely, definitely. He was like, well-rounded.

• 3:01Sam Morril?

  Yeah, killed himself, fucking terrible.

• 3:03Mark Normand?

  Uh, Brooklyn guy.

• 3:05Sam Morril?

  Don't, don't, uh, shoot, yeah, I heard a story actually from my buddy, uh, who worked at a club back in the day, it was like, he was convinced a guy in Brooklyn in the mob wanted to kill him.

• 3:14Mark Normand?

  Hmm.

• 3:14Sam Morril?

  And it was like going on for years and they had to do like a sit-down and all that, I mean, it's fucking weird.

• 3:18Mark Normand?

  Whoa, wait, what was his real name? Go up. Real name, John, Richard John Kaleng- Kalengalo.

• 3:25Sam Morril?

  Kalengalo?

• 3:26Mark Normand?

  Kalengalo. I did not know that. He's super woppy. Ah, maybe that's why the mob hated him.

• 3:32Sam Morril?

  Well, it might, uh, he, he must've made fun of someone or something.

• 3:35Mark Normand?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 3:36Sam Morril?

  So you, so Halifax, was that it, or do you go all over Canada?

• 3:39Mark Normand?

  Halifax was great, and then we went to Ottawa, which, you know, you think-

• 3:41Sam Morril?

  It's a great fucking comedy city.

• 3:43Mark Normand?

  Great town!

• 3:43Sam Morril?

  They fucking laugh.

• 3:45Mark Normand?

  I know!

• 3:45Sam Morril?

  I had one of the best sets of my life in Ottawa.

• 3:47Mark Normand?

  Really?

• 3:47Sam Morril?

  I was opening for Schumer back in the day, in the arena there, and I just fucking a viscer- it was like one of those, I was like, "I can't believe how hard they're laughing."

• 3:54Mark Normand?

  It's great, and, and you know, you're like, Ottawa, it's very unassuming, it's their, it's their capital.

• 3:58Sam Morril?

  It's like their DC, so it's, so it's, it's a lot of smart people.

• 4:01Mark Normand?

  Lot of smart people, beautiful buildings, big architect, the Parliament Building and all that shit.

• 4:07Sam Morril?

  Their, their hockey team's the Ottawa Senators.

• 4:09Mark Normand?

  Ah, there you go.

• 4:10Sam Morril?

  They're the Senators.

• 4:10Mark Normand?

  Weird, uh, not a very- Scary team, like they're gonna get rid of abortion. What is the senator? That's no good.

• 4:18Sam Morril?

  The abolitionists.

• 4:19Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 4:19Sam Morril?

  They're coming to town this week.

• 4:21Mark Normand?

  My son is gay, I'm mad, ah, you know. So, uh, yeah, so Ottawa was unreal. We did some big room and we were late. I accidentally took us to the wrong theater with an Uber. And I was like, why would my agent put us in this hotel 20 minutes away from the theater? This fucking idiot, da-da-da. And I get there, I'm like, hey, I'm here, to the tour manager. He's like, "Yeah, where are you? We're starting in like 10 minutes." I'm like, "I'm outside." He's like, "Where?" And I sent him a pin and he's like, "Here's another pin." The theater was next to the hotel.

• 4:51Sam Morril?

  Yeah.

• 4:51Mark Normand?

  So we had to take an Uber all the way back and DeVito had to just run onstage. And it was one of those where we got there and he was like, "Holy shit, what is this room?" And, uh, it was just the hot, it was the National Arts Center in Ottawa. And, boy, was it a hot crowd.

• 5:04Sam Morril?

  It's, it is a, it is a fucking hot, it's a hot comedy city.

• 5:09Mark Normand?

  It is, it is. And then we went to Absolute Comedy Club after.

• 5:12Sam Morril?

  You're fucking savage.

• 5:13Mark Normand?

  Oh, yeah. Well, everybody gets, Sean Murphy's like, "It's the best club in Canada. It's amazing."

• 5:17Sam Morril?

  They used to say, they used to say you go there to make a tape.

• 5:20Mark Normand?

  Yes.

• 5:21Sam Morril?

  That was, you go to Absolute, or you tape, or what was the one in Boston? Laugh, uh, not Laugh. Comedy Studio.

• 5:27Mark Normand?

  Comedy.

• 5:27Sam Morril?

  They were like, you go there, I got my first Late Nights at Comedy Studio. Cause they're like, go up there, everything kills.

• 5:32Mark Normand?

  Cambridge.

• 5:33Sam Morril?

  Just go clean.

• 5:33Mark Normand?

  Yes, yes. That was a smart crowd.

• 5:36Sam Morril?

  I think, did John Fish do an album?

• 5:38Mark Normand?

  He did, yeah.

• 5:39Sam Morril?

  You know, it's, it's supposed to be a great club. I always wanted to work there back in the day.

• 5:42Mark Normand?

  So did I. I heard all these rumors. Some people wouldn't take the tapes, cause they were so hot.

• 5:46Sam Morril?

  Dude, we were literally, that's how old we are. We were sending like DVDs.

• 5:49Mark Normand?

  DVDs, yeah.

• 5:50Sam Morril?

  Remember that?

• 5:51Mark Normand?

  Oh, of course, sure. You put it in a little envelope.

• 5:53Sam Morril?

  You're young kids. You just copy and paste a link. You don't know how good you have it. We went to the post office.

• 5:58Mark Normand?

  Yes, you had to drop it in a box. So, yeah, that was the whole thing. But, yeah, Killer Club did a set there and, uh, everybody was very nice. And then we got drunk and went home.

• 6:07Sam Morril?

  I love it. Do you drive back or fly? Fly, yeah, you gotta fly. Dude, I was out with Sandler all weekend doing arenas. It was fun as hell. Oh, Sandler. Yeah, crazy, crazy tour to be a part of. I've been out with them a few times before. It's always like the most, it's what you expect. It's like a massive version of how I try to tour. Where it's like there's ba-, you play basketball during the day, but you know, we're traveling and like there's SUVs everywhere, private jets. Wow, it's like summer camp. Summer camp, but it's like great crew. It's like Kevin Nealon is out, Kevin James. Yeah, it's fun as hell. Wow. Fortune Feimster came on some of the dates. I saw that. She's awesome. She's the best. And dude, it was, it's like steakhouse every night. Oh my god.

• 6:51Sam Morril?

  Which is like, first couple nights you're like, this is great. By night three, you're like, I'm gonna get fu-, I'm gonna feel like sick from all this. Yeah. Kind of a champagne problem here, but. Sure, sure. We, uh. Get the meat sweats. I did, I made one faux pas. Uh oh. We're in the arena before the show and my green room's like really far away. So we're all just like hanging out, watching sports, watching the Yankees game. And, uh, you know, Sam was going on like 10 and I'm like, kinda have to take a shit. Oh boy. Should I poop in his green room? Is that, is that a bad move? Mine's really far away. And I was like, ah, it'll be a quick shit. I'll be in and out. This is bold. This is bold. I shouldn't have done it. I had a drink in me. I was like, what am I thinking? Oh my god.

• 7:29Sam Morril?

  I, I went in the green room bathroom. It was not a good shit. It was a, it was a, it was a red meat and whiskey shit. Ah. And it didn't, it came out not well. It's, I was like, it's bad when you're like, this smells bad. When it's your poop and you're like, it's not good. Yeah. And, uh. Sounds like a country song. It's a red meat and whiskey shit. Oh man. I go out and I was like, whatever, he's going on in five. He's not gonna go in the bathroom. He walks into the bathroom. I was like, fuck. Oh. And he came out and it's like in the Sandler voice like, who took a monster shit? And I'm like, oh shit. Did he do it in a, who took a poo?

• 8:11Sam Morril?

  No, it was more like the angry water boy voice where I was like, fuck. And I was like, I did it. And he was like, Sammy.

• 8:18Mark Normand?

  Oh, that's crazy.

• 8:19Sam Morril?

  And Rob Schneider was there and he goes, you can't give him ammo. He's gonna use this against you forever. I was like, fuck.

• 8:23Mark Normand?

  Damn.

• 8:24Sam Morril?

  Damn, I, yeah, I was like, fuck, that was a faux pas. I was like, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that. Yeah.

• 8:29Mark Normand?

  Like hooking up with his daughter.

• 8:30Sam Morril?

  No, no, no. I think that's worse.

• 8:32Mark Normand?

  Okay.

• 8:33Sam Morril?

  I think she's underage. I don't think, I think that's, I think that's a double bad idea. But, uh, no, dude, that's, uh, yeah, that was my fuck up.

• 8:42Mark Normand?

  Wow.

• 8:43Sam Morril?

  But we were like, it's crazy. We end up, we're in Baltimore and, uh, he's like, we're going to Under Armour today to play basketball. And I was like, we're going to like their facility? He's like, yeah, it's in Baltimore.

• 8:51Mark Normand?

  Holy hell.

• 8:52Sam Morril?

  We show up, it's like, dude, they have a football field.

• 8:55Mark Normand?

  What?

• 8:56Sam Morril?

  In Under Armour. They have a football field. They have like all these basketball courts, indoor and outdoor. They have a store. They're like, Steph Curry might come by. And I'm like, fucking, like, look.

• 9:05Mark Normand?

  What?

• 9:06Sam Morril?

  I don't get Star, he's their guy.

• 9:07Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 9:08Sam Morril?

  So I'm like, I don't get Star, it's fucking Steph Curry. And like, he's probably gonna come to the show tonight. And then like last minute, they're like, he has to change his flight, so he's coming tomorrow morning. And I was like, oh, man.

• 9:16Mark Normand?

  Oh, brutal.

• 9:19Sam Morril?

  But we play hoops there and the CEO is there. He's a cool dude. He's like, they're like, here's our info. Like, take whatever you want from the store. So I'm like, I'm not gonna be a dick. They're like, you gotta take the new Curry sneakers. And he's like, they're not even out yet. Take them. I'm like, alright, I'll take a pair of the Curry sneakers. Then they're like, we gotta get some underwear. And I'm like, I'll take some underwear.

• 9:35Mark Normand?

  Alright, I can take.

• 9:35Sam Morril?

  You know, I'm a sheath man, as we all know, but I'll take some underwear, try it out. Uh, you know, they're like, get, get this shirt. I'm like, they're like, this is a good hat. I'm like, I'm like, I'll give it to my dad. Then there's like a Steph Curry shirt. My buddy Dory loves the word. I'll give it to him. So they're like handing me shit. I look over, Joe Vessi, who's one of Sandler's, uh, guys on the road. He's like four bags full of shit.

• 9:53Mark Normand?

  You can't do that.

• 9:54Sam Morril?

  And he was like, oh, what, I have a problem?

• 9:56Mark Normand?

  Oh, yo.

• 9:58Sam Morril?

  But it, I was cracking up. He left with like four pairs of sneakers, fucking, I got a couple of things, but dude, Under Armour makes great shit.

• 10:05Mark Normand?

  Great shit.

• 10:05Sam Morril?

  I was like, this is like, it's, you know what's cool is when the clothes are like, there's like a technology to it.

• 10:10Mark Normand?

  Yes, yes.

• 10:11Sam Morril?

  Where you're like, oh my God, there's like, uh, you know, the hats.

• 10:13Mark Normand?

  Fibers or whatever.

• 10:14Sam Morril?

  Dude, they have these hats that you can like smush up and they don't wrinkle.

• 10:17Mark Normand?

  Whoa.

• 10:17Sam Morril?

  I love shit like that. So it's like for travel, yeah.

• 10:19Mark Normand?

  Yeah, exactly. My hat gets smushed in my bag.

• 10:22Sam Morril?

  Dude, I, yeah, it was, it was sick.

• 10:24Mark Normand?

  Wow. And the story of Under Armour is pretty crazy. I have a big, uh, fascination with like entrepreneur people who start shit. And it's just a guy who started it. Nobody believed in him. And then athletes started wearing it. Like, kinda just, they thought it was the best. Like LeBron loved it and then it just blew up.

• 10:39Sam Morril?

  Yeah, and Curry went with it for, I mean, they got Curry.

• 10:41Mark Normand?

  Oh, that's right, yeah.

• 10:42Sam Morril?

  And they got De'Aaron Fox, they got some guys, yeah.

• 10:45Mark Normand?

  I think he was a coach. He was like a coach, and he's like, "This, this material isn't good enough." And he made his own, and then it, it worked.

• 10:51Sam Morril?

  He left for a while and came back, yeah, we were hanging with Kevin, he was cool as hell, man.

• 10:53Mark Normand?

  Wow.

• 10:55Sam Morril?

  That was fun, uh...

• 10:56Mark Normand?

  Give, give me the whole rundown, like, do you, do you fly out, are you on a jet?

• 10:59Sam Morril?

  Oh, we fly, yeah, we flew private every day, it's crazy. I mean, it's very different from the way we travel, when you're with like a guy like Sandler, you're like, "This guy is, you know, he's so famous too, that you just have to like, you have to move."

• 11:10Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 11:11Sam Morril?

  You know, like, he's very cool, take pictures with people, but like, you literally land at some, you know, private airport, and there's forty people, like, "Sign my thing."

• 11:18Mark Normand?

  Of course.

• 11:19Sam Morril?

  They're so fucking rude, some of these people, they have like the eBay FedEx box ready to go.

• 11:23Mark Normand?

  Ahhh.

• 11:24Sam Morril?

  If you're gonna bother this guy for an autograph, like, I feel like, like, maybe five people out of a hundred, it's for them.

• 11:29Mark Normand?

  Sure.

• 11:30Sam Morril?

  It's like a business, people do it, so, but, uh...

• 11:33Mark Normand?

  So much work, like, get a regular job would be easier at that point, yeah.

• 11:36Sam Morril?

  Yeah, it's like a lot, so then, um, yeah, dude, private, also like, we're so used to doing an hour on stage, that like, it takes me back to be doing like, I'm doing like eight to ten minutes.

• 11:47Mark Normand?

  Oh, yeah, it's an animal.

• 11:49Sam Morril?

  So, you feel like, you're like, "This is my workday, I'm doing eight minutes?"

• 11:52Mark Normand?

  I know.

• 11:53Sam Morril?

  So you just start drinking in the green room, like, "Oh, this fucking, Fortune's like, "Let's fucking, let's drink some Manhattan's." I'm like, "Let's get drunk," so we're getting sauced.

• 11:59Mark Normand?

  Hell, yeah.

• 12:00Sam Morril?

  We're just watching his show, it's fun, it's also so fun to watch, cause it's a lot of music and stuff.

• 12:04Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 12:04Sam Morril?

  So we're just bombed, we're just kinda walking side stage, uh, we're taking the jet back to New York after Baltimore, and, uh, the lady on the jet, this is a, this is a weird one too, I go, "How you doing?" And she goes, "Medium."

• 12:17Mark Normand?

  Ahhh.

• 12:18Sam Morril?

  It's just weird to be that honest, you know?

• 12:20Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 12:21Sam Morril?

  People just say, "I'm good."

• 12:22Mark Normand?

  And on a jet.

• 12:23Sam Morril?

  You just say, "A medium."

• 12:24Mark Normand?

  Medium?

• 12:25Sam Morril?

  Medium is weird.

• 12:26Mark Normand?

  Hamburger?

• 12:26Sam Morril?

  Yeah.

• 12:28Sam Morril?

  So, uh, we're on there, and I'm like, "Is there booze on here?" And she goes, "Of course." So I was like, "I'll take a, I'll take a whiskey." And, uh, she goes, "All right," and then Kevin James across the, he goes, "I want a whiskey too."

• 12:39Mark Normand?

  Ohhh.

• 12:40Sam Morril?

  And then Sandler goes, "Get a, uh, let's get all whiskeys."

• 12:43Mark Normand?

  Whoa!

• 12:44Sam Morril?

  Yeah.

• 12:44Mark Normand?

  That's incredible.

• 12:45Sam Morril?

  Yeah.

• 12:46Mark Normand?

  Drinking whiskey on a jet with Sandler.

• 12:47Sam Morril?

  It was fucking cool.

• 12:48Mark Normand?

  Kevin James.

• 12:48Sam Morril?

  Yeah, and then I went to the private, uh, bathroom on the jet and took a big shit.

• 12:54Sam Morril?

  No, I, I learned my lesson.

• 12:55Mark Normand?

  Uh, we need to make it an emergency landing.

• 12:58Sam Morril?

  Adam, we have to sleep in Newark tonight because Sam took another shit.

• 13:02Mark Normand?

  Oh, wow. I think that actually did happen once. A guy shit so bad in a plane, they had to like.

• 13:06Sam Morril?

  I'm sure it's happened in history. Can we look that? In history, someone must have taken a shit so bad.

• 13:12Mark Normand?

  I think it was like two months ago, literally.

• 13:14Sam Morril?

  I imagine that's the reason of plane crashes. The pilot's like, fuck.

• 13:20Mark Normand?

  Is that an act of terrorism, really, when you think about it? Because.

• 13:24Sam Morril?

  It's an act of inconvenience.

• 13:26Mark Normand?

  There you go.

• 13:27Sam Morril?

  I mean, a terrorist blows it up. I mean, technically, he did blow it up.

• 13:30Mark Normand?

  Yeah, he blew it up.

• 13:31Sam Morril?

  I guess maybe it was an act of terror.

• 13:32Mark Normand?

  It's a biohazard, too. It's like, it's poisonous.

• 13:35Sam Morril?

  And how about when they, when they break down and like the smell just travels? That's a bad one, too.

• 13:40Mark Normand?

  Oh, yeah, that's.

• 13:41Sam Morril?

  Because they all know who did it. They're all looking at the guy who was in there too long.

• 13:44Mark Normand?

  Right, right.

• 13:45Sam Morril?

  It's not a hard case to solve.

• 13:47Mark Normand?

  Look at that, August 2025. There we go.

• 13:51Mark Normand?

  Wow.

• 13:52Sam Morril?

  That's a bad shit.

• 13:53Mark Normand?

  Now, does it shoot out of the plane, or is that a myth?

• 13:57Sam Morril?

  You know, I've had this talk with people, because I did, I remember I did Chelsea Handler's podcast, and she was like mocking me for, no, it was Trevor Noah was mocking me.

• 14:04Mark Normand?

  Okay.

• 14:04Sam Morril?

  He was mocking me because he was like, you think it goes into the sky? And I was like, I don't know, I just figured. And he was like, of course it doesn't.

• 14:10Mark Normand?

  It goes over the ocean.

• 14:11Sam Morril?

  I thought that was our revenge on the birds. We poop back on them.

• 14:15Mark Normand?

  That's true. Okay, it's a vacuum system.

• 14:18Sam Morril?

  It's a vacuum, yeah. No, I didn't even know.

• 14:21Mark Normand?

  I didn't know either. I always heard it just shot out into the world and it dissipated, so nobody got hurt.

• 14:26Sam Morril?

  ChatGPT is gonna make kids either way smarter or way dumber. I don't know.

• 14:30Mark Normand?

  I think dumber. They'll have the information, but they won't be able to think of it themselves. Retain, that's the word.

• 14:36Sam Morril?

  Retain, that's big.

• 14:37Mark Normand?

  My aunt, my fat aunt would always say, I retain water, which I always thought was hilarious as a kid. Like.

• 14:42Sam Morril?

  That just means you have bad hips.

• 14:43Mark Normand?

  Yeah, you're eating cupcakes as we speak, and you're like, ah, it's water. It's all water.

• 14:47Sam Morril?

  Yeah, water. Drink water. See, you feel great when you drink a lot of water.

• 14:51Mark Normand?

  Of course, you're hydrated.

• 14:53Sam Morril?

  Yeah, I mean, you just, you ever just like, like wait like a few hours when you, and you don't eat breakfast immediately, and you just pound water?

• 14:58Mark Normand?

  Oh, it's great. You can feel it like flow through you.

• 15:01Sam Morril?

  I do it like once a year, but it's, it's good. It's a good feeling.

• 15:04Mark Normand?

  Jeff Fox, where they had a great line, his, his ex-wife or somebody would be like, I'm not fat, I retain water. And he goes, so does the Hoover Dam.

• 15:12Sam Morril?

  Oh, that's good. That's a good one.

• 15:14Mark Normand?

  He had a couple bangers. Hey, there he is.

• 15:17Sam Morril?

  Here we go.

• 15:19Mark Normand?

  Uh, but yeah, was that, how'd the weekend end up?

• 15:22Sam Morril?

  Great. You end up getting home, it's, it's great to get home night of. That's, that's the beautiful thing. Sit right here.

• 15:30Mark Normand?

  We did some Sandler weekend.

• 15:31Sam Morril?

  Yeah, we did some, some dates on the, and it's so, I was ready, I thought they were gonna spend the night in Baltimore. So I was like, I'll just like, try to get a late train or bus, you know, or car back. But then they were like, no, we're flying to New York. And I was like, fucking beautiful.

• 15:44Mark Normand?

  Nothing better.

• 15:45Speaker 02

  Yeah, the quick flip, you get there, do the show, be right back in your bed the same day.

• 15:49Sam Morril?

  Quick flip, I'm, I'm using that.

• 15:51Speaker 02

  I didn't even, I didn't even know the concept of private jets in comedy, cause it was such an athletic thing to me.

• 15:58Mark Normand?

  Right.

• 15:58Speaker 02

  Oh, these are athletes. And then I opened for Ron White one time and made an ass of myself. You ever like, open for a big, like when you're a billionaire?

• 16:08Sam Morril?

  I literally made an ass out of myself.

• 16:09Speaker 02

  And you try to like, chum it up with him, like they're just a fucking regular road guy? I opened for Ron White and strike one, I come up to him in the green room. I go, hey man, let me know if you need a ride to the airport in the morning.

• 16:25Mark Normand?

  That's not so bad. That's kind of a serious.

• 16:27Sam Morril?

  That's just polite.

• 16:28Speaker 02

  Then, then I go, he goes, I'm leaving tonight, Roy. And it's Huntsville. I'm like, we're fucking in Alabama, bitch, there's no flight at 2:30. I go, who, who, who you flying? Roy, I have a plane.

• 16:45Speaker 02

  And I just tiptoed into the fucking green room.

• 16:48Sam Morril?

  Yeah, but how, but how the fuck should we know this stuff?

• 16:51Speaker 02

  You don't know, not at year three. Year three, I just, the idea of like, the Kings of Comedy tour on a jet, but I didn't, I didn't know that, yeah.

• 17:02Sam Morril?

  It's also very new for comedy, I feel like.

• 17:04Mark Normand?

  Oh, yeah.

• 17:05Speaker 02

  That's how Ron got, you'd have to have him on the podcast, it's his story to tell, but that, when he got arrested for weed or something, he had a mix-up with some weed and like a pilot, like he landed and there was weed on the plane. And he says that like, somebody on his team, I'm not sure if it was the pilot for sure, but. He says somebody basically tipped the feds off that.

• 17:25Sam Morril?

  The feds?

• 17:26Speaker 02

  Yeah, well, it's federal, you're crossing state, whatever the fuck.

• 17:29Sam Morril?

  That's fucking, but that's crazy.

• 17:30Speaker 02

  That's back when weed was still the devil.

• 17:33Mark Normand?

  Yeah, the devil's grass.

• 17:34Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah, he did good for himself. I respect Ron White so much, bro.

• 17:38Sam Morril?

  Oh, he's a classic.

• 17:39Speaker 02

  He still grinds in like shit rooms, like he'll just go up in random spots in LA. I saw him do Mo Better Mondays.

• 17:47Mark Normand?

  What?

• 17:48Speaker 02

  In LA, which is like the blackest, he did Mo Better Mondays. It was either the same week or the week after DJ Drama got arrested for like all of the mixtape, whatever the fuck.

• 17:59Mark Normand?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 18:00Speaker 02

  And so the room was just extra black.

• 18:04Speaker 02

  If that makes sense.

• 18:05Mark Normand?

  Sure.

• 18:06Speaker 02

  Crushed.

• 18:06Mark Normand?

  We did Mo Better Mondays.

• 18:08Sam Morril?

  Yeah, and Ruby Tuesdays, we did every black show.

• 18:11Mark Normand?

  Ruby Tuesdays.

• 18:12Speaker 02

  Yeah, Ruby Tuesdays.

• 18:13Sam Morril?

  We did every black, we did Chocolate Sundays, we did every night of the week. We did Sad Thursdays. We bombed every show, Mark.

• 18:21Mark Normand?

  Yeah, it was bad.

• 18:22Sam Morril?

  They don't, they don't want to hear us run, we were running roast jokes and they didn't want to hear that shit.

• 18:26Speaker 02

  Yeah, black people don't roast like that, like the, the joke structure is not, it's just gotta be this motherfucker right here.

• 18:35Speaker 02

  Versus, yeah, he went over here, in fact, he went over there.

• 18:39Mark Normand?

  Exactly.

• 18:39Speaker 02

  Nah, you can't do that.

• 18:41Mark Normand?

  Well, you've seen the Doug Williams.

• 18:43Sam Morril?

  Yeah, that was rough. Yeah, the Jamie Foxx thing.

• 18:45Mark Normand?

  That is, my, my biggest nightmare is that.

• 18:47Sam Morril?

  Yeah, it was not good.

• 18:49Speaker 02

  We did a talk with The Hollywood Reporter, these standups, and Jamie Foxx was on the roundtable. And I asked him about it, they edited, they took it out, cause I, and I wish The Hollywood Reporter had left it in, because it was like, he never talks on the record about what happened that night, but Jamie says that Doug was real braggadocious backstage. So it's like, they make him look like this, and Doug was a very established stander, he was hosting a show on the network, that's why he was there in the first place. But apparently Doug had been talking a lot of shit backstage, so then when it came time to actually go out there and roast and the jokes weren't working,

• 19:30Speaker 02

  Jamie's shit was low key a clapback to some stuff that happened off camera. And they kind of play like, oh man, Doug wasn't funny and then Jamie just went for the juggler, cause Jamie's a killer. But I really feel like Jamie was just like, nah, I'm, I'm gonna get my lick back.

• 19:45Sam Morril?

  Well, that, for those of you don't know what we're talking about, Doug Williams is doing a roast, and Jamie Foxx, he takes the mic.

• 19:51Speaker 02

  No, his, his mic is still live.

• 19:53Sam Morril?

  Whose mic's still live, rather.

• 19:54Speaker 02

  While Doug is at the desk.

• 19:55Sam Morril?

  My point is, he takes over. He starts talking, he starts talking through his set. Which I was like, I always thought was kind of a, I understand it's a clapback, but like, I think you gotta let the roaster have the floor.

• 20:06Speaker 02

  Even if they're bombing?

• 20:08Sam Morril?

  I don't, I think that's for the bomber to get out of, though. I think, cause we've seen people bomb and then kind of get out of it. I think it's kind of a, I respect Jamie Foxx, I think he's insanely talented. I just thought it was kind of like a, and I don't know the history, but it's kind of a,

• 20:21Speaker 02

  It's-

• 20:22Sam Morril?

  It's kind of a dirty move a little bit.

• 20:23Mark Normand?

  Legendary.

• 20:24Sam Morril?

  It was, it was-

• 20:25Speaker 02

  And it was peak Jamie, too.

• 20:27Mark Normand?

  Yeah, exactly.

• 20:28Speaker 02

  So he was very, he, he had an arrogance about him. But I just, I say that to say, what Jamie did to Doug was not unprovoked.

• 20:35Mark Normand?

  Okay.

• 20:35Sam Morril?

  That makes, I mean, I would hope.

• 20:37Speaker 02

  It was not unprovoked. And I say that with respect to Doug. Doug is one of my Alabama comedy OGs. He's from Montgomery.

• 20:44Sam Morril?

  Yeah.

• 20:44Speaker 02

  But, it was one of those things where it's like, ah, I, I get why, even if that wasn't what you should have done, but, it was a roast of Emmett Smith, Doug goes up, some of the jokes aren't hitting, and Jamie just starts pretending to be his conscience. Which is what every comedian has, when you're, when you're bombing, you're thinking to yourself the whole time.

• 21:02Mark Normand?

  Exactly.

• 21:03Speaker 02

  "I just did another joke that didn't work. Maybe I should wrap it up." Like, it was,

• 21:09Speaker 02

  it was pretty bad.

• 21:10Mark Normand?

  To the blind eye, we just thought he was being a dick. Cause it was the big star versus the not a Jamie.

• 21:15Sam Morril?

  That's kind of how I read it, too.

• 21:16Speaker 02

  Yeah, but nah, nah, they said, and this is just, this is Jamie Foxx's where Doug was backstage talking cash shit. And, was like, "Yeah, I'ma get out there and I'ma kill everybody, it's gonna be, eh", which is what you're supposed to say at a roast.

• 21:29Sam Morril?

  That's not what I say.

• 21:30Mark Normand?

  Dick Gregory's there.

• 21:31Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 21:32Mark Normand?

  Oh, that's gotta hurt.

• 21:34Sam Morril?

  Yeah.

• 21:35Speaker 02

  I don't, I just don't know if like, black roasts could be done the same as, like, they do like the mainstream.

• 21:41Sam Morril?

  What do you mean?

• 21:42Speaker 02

  Netflix and all of that.

• 21:43Mark Normand?

  I would love to see that.

• 21:45Speaker 02

  I-

• 21:46Sam Morril?

  Why, why do you think there's a difference? Cause I have noticed that black audiences don't respond the same way to like, what we do, the type of roasting we do.

• 21:53Speaker 02

  The black audience, but I don't know if you could organize a situation for any black celebrity to just sit there while other black celebrities just belittle him.

• 22:03Mark Normand?

  Mmm.

• 22:04Speaker 02

  And the idea of get him back and I roast out of love. It would have to legitimately be people out of love. Like, you boys are closer to this shit than me.

• 22:12Sam Morril?

  Flavre Flav took it well.

• 22:13Speaker 02

  Yeah, but Flav knows he's a caricature. Like, he, he, he plays it. He, he.

• 22:19Mark Normand?

  He had his fucking horns on his head.

• 22:21Speaker 02

  Yeah, while holding a piece of chicken. Like, he, he doesn't care.

• 22:24Sam Morril?

  Yeah.

• 22:24Mark Normand?

  I don't know. It was just his lunch. I didn't know.

• 22:26Speaker 02

  Tell me if this is true, but I heard that part of the whole, someone who isn't necessarily a friend of the roastee, being acceptable to roast that person started because none of Chevy Chase's friends would come do the Chevy Chase roast, which was either the first or one of the first Comedy Central roasts.

• 22:46Sam Morril?

  Mm-hmm. Apparently heavily edited. Cause I remember seeing that on TV and I was like, well, I mean, Marc Maron killed, but he only did two minutes.

• 22:54Mark Normand?

  Right.

• 22:54Sam Morril?

  You see, you see Todd Barry, he killed. Two minutes?

• 22:57Mark Normand?

  Right.

• 22:58Sam Morril?

  Greg Giraldo killed. One thirty. Like, it was the weirdest thing to be like, wow, they really cut this down, but.

• 23:03Mark Normand?

  And they used a lot of comics that he didn't know.

• 23:05Sam Morril?

  Man.

• 23:06Speaker 02

  Correct. But because supposedly because they had no choice, but it still got ratings. So then Comedy Central was like, well, fuck it.

• 23:11Sam Morril?

  But it was, it felt.

• 23:12Speaker 02

  Public doesn't care.

• 23:13Sam Morril?

  It felt, you're right, though. It didn't feel like a Dean Martin roast. It felt kind of vicious. Cause they weren't friends. They were like hired guns.

• 23:20Speaker 02

  You don't know the pre-existing, like, like if you did a roast of Ice Cube and you got everyone from the Ice Cube universe of entertainment and you got old rappers, old co-stars.

• 23:31Sam Morril?

  Get his Jewish manager to come out, be like, sorry, sorry about that. I fucked up.

• 23:37Speaker 02

  Dig up Jerry Heller from NWA.

• 23:40Sam Morril?

  Get Paul Giamatti to just come out and reprise his character from Straight Outta Compton.

• 23:44Speaker 02

  Like, if you saw Mike Epps roasting Ice Cube, then it's like, okay, I know the backstory and the love and all of that. I just don't know if you could just, if any black entertainer would just allow just a random, even if you're socially accepted, Ice Cube's not gonna let Drew Ski roast him.

• 24:02Sam Morril?

  It's gotta be someone with a great.

• 24:03Speaker 02

  They have no history.

• 24:04Sam Morril?

  Well, it's gotta be, it's gotta be like a, a, someone who's got an established sense of humor, like a Shaquille O'Neal or someone like that. It's gotta be someone who's like.

• 24:11Speaker 02

  Okay, so someone whose star is as equal to yours and I can kind of fuck with you, but no, you're right. I don't, I just don't see a lot of.

• 24:19Sam Morril?

  Yeah.

• 24:20Speaker 02

  Black roasts that are not like that roast of Emmett Smith that they. Did athletes are the hardest because athletes are like so arrogant and believe they're above jokes. You ever watch, um, it's on YouTube somewhere, but there's Steve Harvey hosting the NFL honors. Which I would argue is the most difficult of all of the hosting gig.

• 24:40Sam Morril?

  Well, harder than the ESPYS.

• 24:41Speaker 02

  Harder than the Correspondents Dinner.

• 24:43Sam Morril?

  Wow.

• 24:44Speaker 02

  Harder than, in my opinion, I think ESPYS is tough, but because you have all of the different sports in there. You can, you can hop scotch around and be more general, but Steve Harvey has done, he did NFL honors for a couple of years. And he would have a killer joke and they would cut to the crowd and it would just be a 22 year old millionaire. Just staring at him. And Steve didn't give a fuck. He's already got the money yet. He's, he has enough cachet that he's never bombing. But.

• 25:13Sam Morril?

  Dude, you know, I saw, I saw a headline, Cooper flag, number one overall pick for the Mavs. It was like a big deal, like his mom wants him to be, you know, financially responsible. So she's limiting his first car purchase to 180 grand. And I was like, wow, just 180 K for a car. It's like, yeah, you should do that on a rookie contract. I don't care how rich you are. You're a child. You don't need a $500,000 whip. You know, it's like, come on.

• 25:40Speaker 02

  At what point though?

• 25:41Mark Normand?

  Look at how well lit that crowded. My God.

• 25:43Speaker 02

  Oh yeah. They want the reaction shots.

• 25:45Mark Normand?

  Oh, that's brutal.

• 25:47Speaker 02

  It's just all just like smirks.

• 25:49Sam Morril?

  Paul Rudd will bail you out of a bomb. Is this, where is it?

• 25:53Mark Normand?

  This is a tough gig.

• 25:54Speaker 02

  Yeah, bro, I would, I would put the NFL honors gig ahead of any other award show gig, just because.

• 26:03Sam Morril?

  Football players have the worst sense of humor, you say, of all sport?

• 26:05Speaker 02

  In my opinion, they're, they're just the toughest of crap because they're the most warrior driven. They're the most, me strong, me no show laughing somehow was a weakness or showing, yeah, that you're vulnerable.

• 26:17Mark Normand?

  Yeah. Well, did you see Jeff Ross? I gotta say, he did a pretty good shack roast. He had a great snit. He tried to peel the microphone. He said, you're not.

• 26:25Sam Morril?

  That was, that was the Emmett Smith roast.

• 26:27Mark Normand?

  Oh, was that the Emmett Smith?

• 26:27Sam Morril?

  But Shaq was there.

• 26:28Speaker 02

  Fuck.

• 26:29Sam Morril?

  He did some, yeah, I mean, those are jokes that would not fly today.

• 26:32Mark Normand?

  Pull that up if you can. Just the reaction of they're all dying. Shaq is loving it.

• 26:37Speaker 02

  Well, that's because Jeff Ross will come in and just be edgy and he's like, "Damn, that white boy crazy."

• 26:41Mark Normand?

  Yes, exactly.

• 26:43Speaker 02

  Every joke is just, "Damn, that white boy."

• 26:45Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 26:46Speaker 02

  Even like that white boy said that shit right there.

• 26:47Mark Normand?

  Right. Oh, wow. This roast was action-packed.

• 26:51Speaker 02

  Bro, you got Dick Gregory, Jeff Ross, Shaq. Shaq loves stand-up, man.

• 26:57Mark Normand?

  Monique. Yeah, he used to have a stand-up show, didn't he?

• 26:59Speaker 02

  Yeah, he had, um...

• 27:01Sam Morril?

  No audio there?

• 27:04Speaker 02

  What the fuck is Jamie Foxx doing?

• 27:06Mark Normand?

  He said such a good line that Fox did the, uh, Triple H.

• 27:12Sam Morril?

  A little pedo joke, alright?

• 27:14Mark Normand?

  Yeah. The white guy slot on the black show is money. That is a great spot. It is.

• 27:36Sam Morril?

  Shaq is a fucking national treasure.

• 27:41Speaker 03

  Your, uh, your knuckles look scraped. Did you walk in?

• 27:44Sam Morril?

  Jesus Christ.

• 27:46Mark Normand?

  He doesn't even flinch. There's no anger.

• 27:48Sam Morril?

  That is fucking... That is a joke. That's a joke you can't do today, I don't think.

• 27:52Mark Normand?

  No, I don't think so.

• 27:55Sam Morril?

  At a roast, you think, Roy?

• 27:56Speaker 02

  At a black roast? Black people just take shit a little different. And also...

• 28:02Mark Normand?

  The Atlantic would write a piece about it, but the black crowd would like it.

• 28:04Sam Morril?

  Right, right. Yeah, The Guardian would try to ruin your life.

• 28:07Mark Normand?

  Yeah, yeah, The Guardian, that's what I...

• 28:09Speaker 02

  The black people would be like, "No, it's fine. Yeah, you came in, you got me."

• 28:12Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 28:13Sam Morril?

  Shaq is such a good fucking sport, dude. I mean...

• 28:17Mark Normand?

  Who's funnier, Shaq or Barkley?

• 28:18Sam Morril?

  Barkley.

• 28:19Mark Normand?

  Barkley's funny.

• 28:20Sam Morril?

  Shaq's funny, but Shaq is more like goofy funny and Barkley's fucking...

• 28:26Speaker 02

  Barkley, Barkley is funny in that granddad that doesn't want to be bothered.

• 28:30Mark Normand?

  Yes.

• 28:31Speaker 02

  But you keep fucking with him until then he finally just says some slick shit. I'll tell you what, them big girls down in San Antonio, they eat ribs. Anyway. He'll just keep it moving. I think it's Barkley's funny comes in the forum in which he chooses to say the things.

• 28:47Mark Normand?

  Yeah, yeah. And then he'll get, she'll get pushed back and flack for saying everything. And he's like, what? They are fat.

• 28:54Mark Normand?

  That's like his rebuttal.

• 28:55Sam Morril?

  I love him.

• 28:57Speaker 02

  But no, I, I, I don't know, man, like roasting, that's just such a specific skill set. That was just never my thing. Like, I, like, back in my Daily Show heydays, they would always ask me to, uh, come do the roast. I'm like, eh.

• 29:11Sam Morril?

  Really? You turned down Comedy Central roast?

• 29:14Speaker 02

  Cause you just, I'm gonna sit there.

• 29:15Sam Morril?

  Which one do you turn down?

• 29:16Speaker 02

  Uh, was it, it was David Spade? And there was.

• 29:22Sam Morril?

  Which one?

• 29:23Speaker 02

  It was one before Bruce Willis. There was a, there was a David Spade. It might have been Charlie Sheen.

• 29:28Mark Normand?

  Oh, that was a big one.

• 29:29Speaker 02

  Anything, I was Daily Show, let's just say 2015 to 2022. So like, anything from 2015 to like 2018?

• 29:38Sam Morril?

  Let's see what we got.

• 29:39Speaker 02

  They probably asked me to do.

• 29:41Sam Morril?

  Man, Sheen talking about, uh.

• 29:43Mark Normand?

  I watched the whole thing.

• 29:44Sam Morril?

  I gotta, yeah, I gotta watch.

• 29:45Speaker 02

  Wait, where, where is it?

• 29:46Sam Morril?

  I watched the interview.

• 29:46Speaker 02

  Is that the doc? Shit, docs come out too fast now.

• 29:51Mark Normand?

  Well, I know.

• 29:53Speaker 02

  It, it used to be.

• 29:54Sam Morril?

  But at least that's a life worth a doc.

• 29:56Mark Normand?

  There's a lot in a lot.

• 29:57Sam Morril?

  That guy's, that guy has lived through some shit, dude. God bless his father.

• 30:01Speaker 02

  Do they make it?

• 30:02Sam Morril?

  His father's like a saint, dude.

• 30:03Mark Normand?

  He is.

• 30:04Speaker 02

  Do they make him sympathetic? They make, does it make you feel bad for Charlie Sheen? Or is it just him like having accountability? Cause some docs are just a subliminal apology.

• 30:13Mark Normand?

  Yeah, there's a little of that, but it's mostly like, holy shit, what a ride. And he's so likeable and charming that you're all, you're all in.

• 30:20Sam Morril?

  Yeah, it seems like his ex-wives don't even hate him.

• 30:22Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 30:23Sam Morril?

  For a guy who lives that hard and was smoking crack and fucking around and for all his ex-wives to be like, eh, he's a good guy.

• 30:29Speaker 02

  I saw, I saw the one clip online where they said, um, yeah, there it is, Rob Lowe. Rob Lowe.

• 30:36Mark Normand?

  Oh, Rob Lowe.

• 30:37Speaker 02

  Rob Lowe was the one, because that was 2016, I was at Daily Show, and then, um, the Bruce Willis one.

• 30:42Mark Normand?

  Hmm.

• 30:43Speaker 02

  I don't know, I just felt like I would just sit there.

• 30:45Sam Morril?

  Bruce doesn't remember any of the jokes, at least.

• 30:48Mark Normand?

  He would just sit there.

• 30:49Speaker 02

  Also, also like, this is after Patrice died, so I know y'all needed a new fat guy to throw dot BBs jokes at. I'm not gonna fuckin'.

• 31:01Mark Normand?

  Yeah, no, that's.

• 31:02Speaker 02

  Yeah, look at that, Lil' Rel was the only black person, I was like, nah. God, I'm finna sit me here.

• 31:06Sam Morril?

  I don't even remember Rel on it.

• 31:08Mark Normand?

  They'll say.

• 31:09Speaker 02

  And hit me with all it, like, no. And like, the, like, that's just such a random cast of people, all respectful, all respected resumes, but I just don't know if you could set up a lineup that random for somebody black in a steam. You're not gonna roast, Bruce Willis, who's a black action, the Wesley Snipes?

• 31:29Mark Normand?

  Hmm, tech.

• 31:30Speaker 02

  Who you gonna, who you gonna, but, okay, but what ten black people that he won't get up and punch in the fucking face? Because you don't know me enough to make that joke.

• 31:38Mark Normand?

  Right.

• 31:40Speaker 02

  And the people who know him are gonna come in.

• 31:40Sam Morril?

  But you signed up for a roast, you kinda got it, if you sign up, because I heard Netflix is like, trying to put together another roast, and one of the people they really wanted was Will Smith, and I'm like, he's not, he's not really famous for taking jokes well, I don't know if you're aware.

• 31:53Mark Normand?

  That's a good point.

• 31:54Sam Morril?

  He's not the best.

• 31:55Speaker 02

  He seems like the type that would, you know, that would be smart for Will Smith to do, though.

• 32:00Mark Normand?

  That's true, show he can take it now.

• 32:02Sam Morril?

  Yeah, but you know, but you're gonna be looking over the whole, after every joke, you're gonna be like, looking over? Like, is he pissed?

• 32:07Mark Normand?

  If Jade is there, that would change everything.

• 32:10Speaker 02

  Yeah, they would go.

• 32:11Sam Morril?

  Well, you think she would allow that shit? Literally every joke would be about how she's a whore and he's gay, that's every joke.

• 32:16Speaker 02

  Yeah, and your kids are weird, like, they'll, they'll find every nerve to hit him with, but if he sat there and took that shit, it would be like.

• 32:23Sam Morril?

  Takes a bunch of Valium right before, just, just make him comatose.

• 32:27Speaker 02

  Ayahuasca out.

• 32:29Speaker 02

  This isn't the right comparison, but if Will Smith did a Netflix roast in the spirit of, "Hey, you know, come get tarred and feathered and come on back into the fold of society," it would be similar to when Steve Ranzisi did roast Battle.

• 32:45Sam Morril?

  Hmm. He battled it. Yeah.

• 32:48Speaker 02

  In the sense of, granted, Ranzisi was not.

• 32:52Sam Morril?

  In the sense that it won't really work. Right.

• 32:54Speaker 02

  You don't think it worked?

• 32:55Sam Morril?

  A little bit. I don't know.

• 32:57Speaker 02

  Well, with the comedy community or with the public at large?

• 32:59Sam Morril?

  I think comics are fine with it. I think, I think it was, but I think it's more like the, I think in the grand scheme of things. No, I don't think it, he was bigger before. I think it, no, I think that was.

• 33:09Speaker 02

  So it's kind of like a Delia thing where you were bigger before the thing happens and then whatever happens up the side.

• 33:16Sam Morril?

  Chris is still, uh, sells a lot of tickets in the road, doesn't he?

• 33:18Speaker 02

  Yeah, he still sells, but I mean, in terms of the zeitgeist, he's built his audience. So, I mean, he's got that, but I wonder though, like what Ranzisi at that time, I mean, since you were there, I always felt like in the comedy community, I saw it as, okay, well, he owned it.

• 33:34Sam Morril?

  Hmm.

• 33:35Speaker 02

  So whatever, so whatever finger wag, I mean, granted, considering you think about what a scandal is now, if the Ranzisi shit happened today, it wouldn't even be a fucking thing. Like, in fact, you could lean into that shit and sell more tickets.

• 33:50Sam Morril?

  That was, there was something weird about that too, was like the way you plan those pieces, those hit pieces, like the New York Times were like, "Well, have it come out the day of his special."

• 33:59Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 34:00Sam Morril?

  Comedy, you know what I mean? They're like, "You gotta pull the special now."

• 34:02Speaker 02

  It's kind of like the Hasan Minhaj Daily Show, which was the week before the writer strike ended and they were gonna announce him as host or whatever.

• 34:11Sam Morril?

  Oh, wow.

• 34:12Speaker 02

  So like.

• 34:13Sam Morril?

  It's big game hunting. We can get him. We'll get him, take him down. Well, it's literally the last thing the journalists have now. That's all they, I mean, that's like, they're like, you know, the days of Edward R. Murrow are gone. So they're like, "What do we have? We could, we could take this dude down." Right. We got Barry Weiss.

• 34:28Speaker 02

  Yeah, Pablo Torre. Seems like Pablo Torre's on this John Stossel.

• 34:32Sam Morril?

  If he fucking goes after Brunson, dude. Don't help me, God. Pablo, you fucking step back.

• 34:36Speaker 02

  Everybody likes Pablo till he goes after their team.

• 34:39Sam Morril?

  Yeah.

• 34:39Speaker 02

  I remember, um, this is a random name drop, but I'm friends with Ruben Studdard.

• 34:46Sam Morril?

  Whoa, old school. How's he doing?

• 34:48Speaker 02

  He's from Birmingham. He's straight. He tours and like he makes a fuck ton of money overseas.

• 34:53Sam Morril?

  He looks good.

• 34:54Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah, Rub. Rub slumped up on y'all.

• 34:57Sam Morril?

  He was the first.

• 34:58Speaker 02

  Rub got a wife. She cooked good for him. He got a child to live for.

• 35:02Mark Normand?

  Wow.

• 35:03Speaker 02

  His life is good, man.

• 35:04Sam Morril?

  Good dude?

• 35:04Speaker 02

  Yeah, great dude, man.

• 35:06Mark Normand?

  Great voice.

• 35:06Speaker 02

  And so, so he was touring with Clay Aiken for a minute. They were doing like a two man thing for a while a couple of years ago, but now he's just touring solo. But Rub and I got to talking about that first season of American Idol. Do you remember this girl named Frenchie?

• 35:21Sam Morril?

  No.

• 35:21Speaker 02

  There was a contestant named Frenchie in season one and they kicked her off the show because somebody found a nude picture of her. It'd be the equivalent. And it's, it's like, and it was a huge scandal, like oh two, bitch.

• 35:36Mark Normand?

  Oh, yeah.

• 35:36Speaker 02

  They was like, oh no, can you believe, yeah.

• 35:39Mark Normand?

  Wow, topless.

• 35:41Sam Morril?

  And later that year on the Super Bowl, uh, Janet Jackson whipped out her tit.

• 35:44Speaker 02

  Yeah, disqualified early in the season due to topless photos found earlier in her career.

• 35:49Sam Morril?

  That is pretty fucked up.

• 35:50Mark Normand?

  Catch Me Outside girls, the number one OnlyFans.

• 35:52Speaker 02

  Hawk tours and all of that shit.

• 35:54Mark Normand?

  Yeah, right.

• 35:55Speaker 02

  Yeah, I suck dick. Download my podcast, like.

• 35:59Sam Morril?

  But what happened to her, though?

• 36:00Speaker 02

  It's wild.

• 36:00Sam Morril?

  Because it'll work for a minute, but is there staying power and, and that?

• 36:06Speaker 02

  But, but, but you're talking about staying power. Most people are just trying to hit a lick. Like the average American only makes three million before they die.

• 36:14Sam Morril?

  Yeah, no.

• 36:15Speaker 02

  Maybe four if you want to get cute for inflation.

• 36:18Mark Normand?

  Right.

• 36:18Speaker 02

  So if you can hit any type of celebrity.

• 36:21Sam Morril?

  That works for one. There's a lot of people that get stopped and say gnarly shit into a, into a mic and, you know, like you, she won a lot of ticket with that.

• 36:29Mark Normand?

  But I think he's saying it, the nudity would not get you, that would help your career now.

• 36:34Sam Morril?

  No, no, I totally get the point you're making. I'm saying even in, in now, you know, it works for a minute, but it's, and it's very rare that it works.

• 36:41Mark Normand?

  It's short money.

• 36:42Sam Morril?

  It's short money.

• 36:43Mark Normand?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 36:43Sam Morril?

  Better said.

• 36:44Mark Normand?

  Look at Monica Lewinsky, her whole fucking character assassination tarnished.

• 36:49Sam Morril?

  She'd be a victim now.

• 36:50Mark Normand?

  She'd be a victim now.

• 36:51Sam Morril?

  She was really mocked. She was young as fuck. Like, she was kinda treated like the homewrecker and the piece of shit.

• 36:57Speaker 02

  Now, you wanna talk about some jokes, you go back and go, ugh, Leno monologues.

• 37:01Mark Normand?

  Leno, yes.

• 37:02Speaker 02

  Leno was on her neck.

• 37:04Sam Morril?

  Remember Rock's bit, though, when he goes, "This whole thing is Hillary's fault."

• 37:07Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 37:08Sam Morril?

  "You know what type of man you have. She put the whole country in danger." "You're the first lady, you gotta be the first one who needs to suck his dick."

• 37:17Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 37:17Speaker 02

  Applause and roar.

• 37:19Sam Morril?

  That was a great bit, though.

• 37:20Mark Normand?

  They're like, "Yeah."

• 37:21Sam Morril?

  That one holds up.

• 37:23Mark Normand?

  You should propel out a chunk on Monica.

• 37:26Speaker 02

  Oh, fuck.

• 37:27Mark Normand?

  We'll be right back to suck that dick, or whatever it was.

• 37:29Sam Morril?

  Man, Monica Lewinsky, man, that was, uh...

• 37:31Mark Normand?

  Oh, she could've sucked us into a utopia. That was it.

• 37:34Speaker 02

  Yeah, I just think it's interesting in how we retroactively try to cancel people for stuff we found, but we never try to, like, retroactively, I don't know, forgive is the word, but, hey.

• 37:45Sam Morril?

  That's a, that's a great point.

• 37:47Speaker 02

  Sorry about that. We shunned ya, you showed your titties, sorry about that. Come on back for season thirty of American Idol, Frenchy.

• 37:54Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 37:55Sam Morril?

  Well, it's hard to remove a scarlet letter, you know?

• 37:58Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 37:58Sam Morril?

  I mean, once it's on there, it's kinda like, you know, it's like having a DUI charge, and, you know, and it's still gonna be on that Google Top Ten.

• 38:05Speaker 02

  Oh, I know. The time I go to Canada, they bring up the credit card from ninety-eight that I stole.

• 38:12Mark Normand?

  Damn.

• 38:13Speaker 02

  And it got worse, like, after the last election. Like, do y'all say the word Trump? Am I allowed to say the word Trump?

• 38:19Mark Normand?

  Please, help the album.

• 38:21Speaker 02

  When Trump started, you know, the transcription.

• 38:25Speaker 02

  When Trump, when Trump started fucking with them tariffs and all that immigration shit, like, Canadian customs, like, I've never been grilled the way I've been grilled in the last, like, year, just trying to get into that country.

• 38:38Sam Morril?

  Wow.

• 38:38Speaker 02

  Over a credit card.

• 38:40Sam Morril?

  How about getting back in? Is it easy to get back in though?

• 38:42Speaker 02

  It's a piece of cake.

• 38:43Mark Normand?

  They don't mind.

• 38:43Sam Morril?

  Getting back in, I made jokes, my tour manager was furious at me, we were going through security and he goes, the guy recognized me, goes, Sam, how was Canada? And I go, I know, just some human trafficking. And my tour manager's like, what the fuck are you doing? It's still customs, you idiot. But they all laughed. I was like, alright, we're good.

• 38:58Mark Normand?

  Yeah. They don't care on the way back.

• 38:59Sam Morril?

  On the way back, you're good. The way in, you gotta be a little bit like, we'll be on our best behavior.

• 39:03Speaker 02

  I think also with Canada though, it also matters what city you fly into.

• 39:08Sam Morril?

  Which are the bad ones, you think?

• 39:09Speaker 02

  I think Toronto and Montreal are super strict.

• 39:12Sam Morril?

  Why is that?

• 39:14Speaker 02

  I don't know, I feel like just more Americans probably come there to party and goof off and do other shit.

• 39:18Mark Normand?

  Right.

• 39:19Sam Morril?

  Those are two pretty damn good cities.

• 39:21Mark Normand?

  Great towns.

• 39:22Speaker 02

  Vancouver, I found to be very laid back and like, not tripping in the least. Like, you have to get like, to get like, if you've been convicted of a felony in America, that would get you more than 10 years in prison. In Canada, you have to get paperwork to prove that you are no longer wanted for any crimes in America. But you have to get that paperwork from every state in which you've ever resided.

• 39:48Mark Normand?

  Oh, yeah, yeah.

• 39:48Speaker 02

  To get that paperwork, you have to physically go to that state to request that paperwork. And then, once you have all of that paperwork, you send it to Canadian Customs and then they review your application and decide whether or not you can come in to tell the jokes at Montreal.

• 40:05Mark Normand?

  Wow.

• 40:06Speaker 02

  And so, I kept coming back into Canada at different mile markers in that process, but I hadn't fully yet done all of the forgiveness paperwork yet. And like, it is a fucking pain. Like, Europe don't give a fuck. Like, UK was cool, but...

• 40:22Sam Morril?

  Although flying into London is a bitch now, dude.

• 40:25Mark Normand?

  Is it?

• 40:25Sam Morril?

  They made it harder, for sure. Yeah, there's this weird process, yeah.

• 40:29Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah, you need a UK permit thing, like, you have to go online.

• 40:33Sam Morril?

  And if you get into the wrong line, there's, you just get like, they're like, if you get into that line, they just throw you out of the country and you're like, but I'm here, what the fuck? But my agent from me just longed up, he's like, do not get in that line. I was like, alright.

• 40:44Mark Normand?

  Did you go yet?

• 40:45Sam Morril?

  No, this was last year.

• 40:46Mark Normand?

  Oh, okay. Wow, weird. I didn't plan, I didn't... I didn't find it that weird.

• 40:49Sam Morril?

  They were, they were pretty intense when I was there, but maybe they dialed it back a little, I don't know, but.

• 40:54Speaker 02

  Is it more because you were there for business and they're like.

• 40:56Sam Morril?

  Well, you were there for business.

• 40:57Mark Normand?

  Yeah, yeah. The most I got was audiences like, what's up with your boy Trump? And I'm like, let me text him. I don't know. Like, what do you want me to do?

• 41:04Speaker 02

  Yeah, but y'all are like touring on something like, I'd show up for, like, I'm just now doing my first solo shows in London in December. I normally show up as part, I always show up as part of a festival or I'm hired for BBC shit. And so I just have a sheet of paper from the BBC.

• 41:21Mark Normand?

  Yes.

• 41:21Speaker 02

  Those mommy, mommy said I could come and just read that. So I don't get finger fucked the way you guys do. Like I.

• 41:27Mark Normand?

  Well, with that BBC, who knows?

• 41:32Mark Normand?

  But yeah, I know what you mean.

• 41:33Sam Morril?

  What, um, what, how is this CNN show going for you?

• 41:36Speaker 02

  It's good, man.

• 41:37Sam Morril?

  Yeah, I missed season two, right?

• 41:39Speaker 02

  Three. Well, we're, we're going into episode thirty by the end of this year, by the end of this run. You know, it's a remake of the British show. And that's why the, the British version's been running for thirty years.

• 41:50Mark Normand?

  They love a panel show in England.

• 41:51Speaker 02

  Yeah, that's why we were nervous about this shit even working, but I'd already quit Daily Show. So I'm like, shit, may as well try it.

• 41:59Sam Morril?

  Was there, was there any fear leaving the Daily Show? Or you're kind of like, I've done my time there. I'm good.

• 42:03Speaker 02

  There was no fear. I, it's a comic. You know, like every seven, eight years, you have to evolve or change or whatever. I mean, to me, the fear is part of what's happening now with Colbert, right? Where all the shit that's happening now, I thought was gonna happen three years. Like the Viacom Paramount merger, that's been in motion for years.

• 42:25Sam Morril?

  Yeah.

• 42:26Speaker 02

  So when I decided to quit, I was like, oh, the merger's gonna happen and then they're gonna cut costs. And when you cut costs, you cut staff and the first staff you cut is the most senior staff. They're gonna fire me. And if they get a new host, what if the new host doesn't like, fuck it, I'm leaving now. And I'll find something else now. Cause it's an election year. Cause if they're gonna do a new show, you do it during an election year. And it's only been two new political satire shows. It was us and After Midnight. That's the only thing that's been, and they're gone, so.

• 42:59Mark Normand?

  That's political?

• 43:00Speaker 02

  Well, it's late night, non-scripted panel, whatever.

• 43:05Speaker 02

  So, the idea of if I'm gonna find something after Daily Show, let me just find it now. But CNN's happy, ratings is solid, it's a Saturday night show, so the bar is low in terms of what we need to do. Did you audition for it, or were you just kinda picked for it? I met with the producers, I'm sure they met with some other folks, and then we just discussed the concept, and then they made me an offer, but there was no like, audition, screen test, or. That's amazing.

• 43:29Mark Normand?

  So sick of those.

• 43:30Speaker 02

  Any of that other shit.

• 43:31Mark Normand?

  And you probably got some sweet suits, look at you.

• 43:34Speaker 02

  I don't know, man, they be stingy with them. How, what do you mean? They, well, you know, you get, you get fitted for really nice suits to wear on the show, but they all still stay in like a wardrobe closet at CNN, so I don't really get them, but.

• 43:50Mark Normand?

  Damn.

• 43:50Speaker 02

  I stole all my Daily Show suits.

• 43:53Mark Normand?

  Yeah, good for you.

• 43:55Speaker 02

  So you get, when you're on those shows, they just give you suits? Well, not CNN, cuz at least not yet, maybe season four, I'll get to keep the suits, but right now, the wardrobe lady has the keys to that. Like, if I called her right now, "Hey, let me get the green suit from episode 21, I'm gonna wear it on Sherri Shepherd." Well, I don't know if we can, let me see if I can get that cleared. So, it's a lot of that shit.

• 44:21Mark Normand?

  Right, right.

• 44:22Speaker 02

  Cuz if I fuck up this, I don't know, I don't know what they do with the suits, I get them customed. Like, the cut for me, it's not like unless you fucking replace me with Kenan Thompson, who's it gonna fit?

• 44:31Mark Normand?

  You're not that big. But, can I ask a weird cultural question?

• 44:36Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 44:36Mark Normand?

  Alright, so I've noticed that my black brethren sticks with TV. They like the industry, and the honkies have gone more internet. I see like, like Jordan Fisher, he's a friend of mine, he used to open for me, and he's doing a YouTube special, and I was like, "It's about fucking time." And he's like, "Well, nobody would buy my special," and I'm like, "Welcome to our world." Like, we shot a YouTube special five years ago.

• 44:58Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 44:59Mark Normand?

  I feel like less black guys shoot YouTube, and they wanna wait for that industry nod.

• 45:05Speaker 02

  I think there's still perceived value in industry acceptance by some black comics.

• 45:13Speaker 02

  That's part of it. The other half is lack of knowledge or recon or sharing of resources amongst black comics as well.

• 45:22Sam Morril?

  Oh, really?

• 45:23Speaker 02

  The idea of shoot a YouTube special. Okay, well, how and what are you doing?

• 45:28Sam Morril?

  We'll tell, we'll tell anything.

• 45:29Speaker 02

  Because everybody asks like, just, man, I shot it, upload it. No, you didn't. You'd set and you worked it with clips and then you chopped that 60 down into 90 seconds and then you put those up at certain times and then you tagged it, you sponsored a couple of posts, like there was a full digital strategy. And YouTube is nothing like Facebook or Instagram where black people thrive, where a lot of black, especially young ones thrive. Like, I would say, somebody like, say, Country Wayne would be a good example to back up what you're talking about. Yeah, Country Wayne's huge and then Netflix came knocking and he's like, I'll take that. I'll take that little bit of money.

• 46:04Sam Morril?

  Well, we did the same thing.

• 46:05Speaker 02

  Because there's still some sort of prestige to, oh, the industry a lot.

• 46:10Sam Morril?

  Of course.

• 46:11Speaker 02

  When the truth is that the industry probably doesn't fucking matter that much.

• 46:14Sam Morril?

  Well, you dip your toes in both worlds. I mean, I think Tim Dillon's a great example of that, a guy who, you know, built this huge internet following, but then like every once in a while, he's like, I should do a Netflix thing, you know, just to be in both worlds. There's a value to that as well.

• 46:28Speaker 02

  So I did my third, I did my fourth special with Hulu. I'm just having talked about it. The Hulu special, I could have done solo, but I opted to do it with Hulu because they were just now starting to do stand-up and I need audience. My biggest, the gift and curse of The Daily Show is that you only have time to do The Daily Show. And then my first three specials were on Comedy Central, which I would argue y'all were blessed to not get chosen by Comedy Central because they show your shit once.

• 46:57Sam Morril?

  They flush it down the toilet.

• 46:58Speaker 02

  Throw that bitch in the attic.

• 46:59Sam Morril?

  They really were living like it was 1992.

• 47:01Speaker 02

  I know.

• 47:02Sam Morril?

  They were really like, here's one, here's one airing of that thing you worked for years on.

• 47:06Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 47:07Sam Morril?

  Didn't you feel crazy being like, hey, watch my shit at 11?

• 47:10Speaker 02

  On Fridays.

• 47:11Sam Morril?

  Yeah, on Friday.

• 47:12Speaker 02

  On a Friday.

• 47:12Sam Morril?

  Done at 11 and you're like, I have plans, I'm not gonna be here.

• 47:15Mark Normand?

  Yeah, exactly.

• 47:15Sam Morril?

  And you're like, well, then you can't ever see it.

• 47:17Mark Normand?

  Ever again.

• 47:18Speaker 02

  And then the-

• 47:19Sam Morril?

  And then you have to do three cuts of it.

• 47:21Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 47:21Sam Morril?

  You're like, this is the short version. You're like, alright, this is fucking-

• 47:24Speaker 02

  LCI, the limited commercial interruption.

• 47:27Sam Morril?

  Yeah, limited commercial, extended.

• 47:29Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 47:30Sam Morril?

  Dude, it was insane. That's like a two-week edit.

• 47:32Speaker 02

  A fifty, a forty-seven, and a forty-three.

• 47:35Mark Normand?

  There you go.

• 47:35Sam Morril?

  Yeah, and you, and you, the whole time, you're just like, I have to cut, like, I have to shorten a joke.

• 47:40Mark Normand?

  I know.

• 47:41Speaker 02

  So the only way you see the sixty is if you watch it online, assuming you have at that time-

• 47:46Mark Normand?

  The app.

• 47:46Speaker 02

  The Comedy Central app. Then my second special was CBS All-Access.

• 47:50Mark Normand?

  Dope.

• 47:51Speaker 02

  Then my third special was Paramount Plus. And there was a time when Paramount Plus first started, and you searched for my name, only one of the three specials came up.

• 47:59Mark Normand?

  Jesus.

• 48:01Speaker 02

  Waiting on the coding, waiting on the tech to catch up.

• 48:04Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 48:05Speaker 02

  It was fucking horrible. Then Hulu calls.

• 48:07Sam Morril?

  Disaster.

• 48:08Speaker 02

  And I go, oh, well Hulu has a network of shit, and overseas it'll air. That's the other thing. Comedy Central was geo, uh, was-

• 48:16Sam Morril?

  Yeah, you couldn't watch it in Canada.

• 48:17Speaker 02

  Geo-fenced. So-

• 48:19Mark Normand?

  Wow.

• 48:20Speaker 02

  Your shit didn't air in Europe for another four months because the American subscribers have first dibs-

• 48:26Mark Normand?

  Mm-hmm.

• 48:26Speaker 02

  On the cut, because it's a cable model.

• 48:28Sam Morril?

  Dude, I was the first comic on Comedy Central to work out where I was like, you have to put my special on your website at least, so people without cable can watch. And they were like, deal. And I said, and no ads. And they were like, okay. Dude, you looked it up. I shit you not, there was like a three-minute ad every two minutes.

• 48:45Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 48:45Mark Normand?

  Whoa.

• 48:45Sam Morril?

  It was mental. It was like, I was like, what the fuck is this?

• 48:48Mark Normand?

  Whoa.

• 48:49Sam Morril?

  I told him, like, dude, we're competing with Netflix over here. This was like the beginning of Netflix, but I was like, you gotta, like, there's no ads there. You got, now-

• 48:57Mark Normand?

  That's crazy.

• 48:57Sam Morril?

  Ads are coming to all of them now. It's like, you know, I did my last one with Amazon, and it was like, the, literally the year I decided to go with Amazon, after I signed the contract, they're like, oh, we're doing ads now if everyone doesn't pay the extra, like, four dollars a month or whatever. And I was just like-

• 49:10Mark Normand?

  Ugh.

• 49:10Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 49:11Sam Morril?

  Fuck.

• 49:11Mark Normand?

  You're better off on Al Jazeera or something. It's like, what are we doing here?

• 49:15Speaker 02

  Yeah, I would argue, though, for a lot of comics, I don't even think you need a special. I just think you need volume and re- and repetition. Like, that's my approach starting next year.

• 49:24Sam Morril?

  Really? So you're done with specials?

• 49:26Speaker 02

  Well, I, I wanna do a one-man show at some point, but I think the visuals of how I put that together gotta be different, so I'm kinda studying- Ali Siddique, I'm studying Birbiglia. Jeff Ross, I just went to see his live joint, the Banana Broadway show he's doing. Oh, yeah, yeah. So, to see, well, what are all of the creative possibilities? But in the meantime, just stand up? You put out seven, eight minutes every other week. For me, I'm not Josh Johnson with it. I don't have that type of. That's crazy. I hesitate to say autistic output. I'll say locked in. Yeah, there you go. That's how you say on the spectrum without saying, just, that boy locked in. Locked in. Locked in.

• 50:12Speaker 02

  So, for me, I think any comic is better off just doing fifteens every month, or. That might be the new model. Every month. I mean, that way, you take the fifteen or the ten minute bit, you chop that bitch down to a couple ninety seconds to put it everywhere. We're basically programmed, we're network programmers for our own content across multiple platforms, but then you have to learn all of that. And I don't think in the black comedy community, there's nearly as much of a sharing of knowledge as it is on the white side. And then there's also a lot of ageism on the black side. I don't know how y'all, how y'all roll, but like. Or Earthquake should be way bigger, but he's old. Okay, so then, you, you look at COVID.

• 50:55Speaker 02

  COVID, to me, was a perfect time where black, older black comics, and you correct me if white comics was doing this shit too, but in the black comedy community, there's a lot of older black comics who've been talking mad shit about the Instagram niggas and all the Facebook cats and all the. They're doing it too. Okay, and so then, then that fucking pandemic hit and you had to sit your ass down. Now, all of a sudden, you all right, we're doing a little selfie camera. Yeah, you should have been here with it. So, I think that there isn't necessarily a sharing of resources or pooling together. Like, there should be multiple eighty-five south shows. You know, Ryan Davis, I, I forgive me, Ryan, for not remembering the podcast you were on, but he was talking about.

• 51:38Speaker 02

  The fact that there's beef in black comedy and there's so few black comics. And then y'all have the audacity to beef, which is why there'll never be another Harlem Nights.

• 51:46Mark Normand?

  Hmm.

• 51:46Speaker 02

  Cause you can't put all your differences aside to come and do one thing together, so.

• 51:52Mark Normand?

  Well, even Cosby didn't like Eddie Murphy and then hated Richard Pryor.

• 51:57Sam Morril?

  Yeah, but Eddie, but Eddie helped out Rock, you know?

• 52:00Mark Normand?

  That's true.

• 52:00Sam Morril?

  And then, you know, I think, and then Rock and Chappelle, I think there is a, you know, a kinship, but you're right. I think I have seen, like, Cat Williams is talking about this too, right? He's also like talks a lot of shit.

• 52:11Speaker 02

  Yeah, but Cat, Cat Williams is interesting though in that without knowing the numbers on other comedians, I would say Cat Williams and Kevin Hart have probably created more homeowners in the black community than any other comedian.

• 52:24Sam Morril?

  Interesting.

• 52:25Speaker 02

  Just in terms of volume of comics that have worked for them.

• 52:28Sam Morril?

  Hmm.

• 52:29Speaker 02

  Like, I mean, Cat carries usually like four openers.

• 52:32Sam Morril?

  But they hate each other, Cat and Kevin, right?

• 52:34Speaker 02

  As far as last I checked.

• 52:36Sam Morril?

  Yeah.

• 52:36Speaker 02

  What's, what day is it today?

• 52:40Speaker 02

  Some days they're at peace, the next day Mike Epps and then it's, it's always you thought they broke.

• 52:44Sam Morril?

  You never know.

• 52:45Speaker 02

  Yeah, you thought they broke the truce and then someone throws a missile at another camp. I, I just, I don't know, man, I, I hate it, but I try to talk to the youngins to figure out what they're doing, what their outlook is on the shit. Cause you gotta grow it, cause at the end of the day, I mean, CNN is a blessing, but all this shit could get snatched from you, man. And that's what I.

• 53:06Mark Normand?

  That's why the internet, that's why I put like Ali Siddique you mentioned and Josh Johnson, two guys on YouTube, two guys killing it.

• 53:11Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 53:11Mark Normand?

  So you meet like a, like you talk to Ian Laura, I'm like, get a pod going, do, do a YouTube.

• 53:16Sam Morril?

  He does a pod, doesn't he?

• 53:17Mark Normand?

  I don't think he does.

• 53:18Sam Morril?

  I think he does.

• 53:18Mark Normand?

  Oh shit. Well, check his pod.

• 53:22Sam Morril?

  You know, also though, it's, I think, you know, you're right.

• 53:24Speaker 02

  Yeah, he's got one.

• 53:25Mark Normand?

  Oh shit.

• 53:26Speaker 02

  Adulthood with Ian Laura.

• 53:27Mark Normand?

  I've never heard of it and I can't wait to start listening.

• 53:30Sam Morril?

  Well, I love Ian, so anyway, anyway.

• 53:33Mark Normand?

  He's been, he's an industry guy, he's waiting for HBO Spanish or.

• 53:36Sam Morril?

  He's doing other stuff, you know, I mean, look, it's, it's a grind, man, it's, it's a grind, but that's why we do have to kind of have each other's backs because you see these, the specials, I think you're right, are gonna go down and down each year because. At a certain point, it's gonna be like comedy movies where it's like, they're like, we got a backlog. We're good. We don't need, like, why are they not making comedy movies? It's like when Rainn Wilson was here. People are watching The Office still. People, they'll re-watch a Segura special or something. We don't need to buy this many, like, they'll buy them still, but not at the same clip, I don't think. And so you do have to help each other because the internet's not going anywhere. We can keep putting out clips, specials. I'm still kind of married to the idea of specials. I like working towards something that at the end of the tour, after you hit everywhere, you hone it.

• 54:21Sam Morril?

  You make it better as you go and then you, here it is.

• 54:24Speaker 02

  And you present that.

• 54:25Sam Morril?

  And you have, and you have a body of work and it lives forever.

• 54:28Speaker 02

  Where you present it is where the rules now change.

• 54:31Sam Morril?

  Right.

• 54:31Speaker 02

  And so if you're waiting for industry to choose you, you gotta have an audience first before they'll even consider you half of the fucking time. So you have to build an audience. And so I feel like at Daily Show, there was, there was a comfort. There's definitely a degree of comfort because every year I was basically on an overall deal with Comedy Central. So all my scripted shows, every script I sold, every movie I sold was through Paramount. And then I had Daily Show and every time I re-upped with Daily Show, you give me another special and ah, man. But nobody watched that one, but you paid me a little bit more for this one. So, all right, I'll stay with you, coach. Ah, nobody really watched that one, but you paid me even more for this third one. I'll stay around.

• 55:15Speaker 02

  And you lose eight years of audience traction because for whatever numbers, I guarantee you, whatever the fuck numbers, my first special did, I, fuck, bitch, I'll tell you, the, it's public, Nielsen. My second special was the highest rated premiere for a special at Comedy Central. And I think I did maybe a point seven share, which is 700,000 people.

• 55:45Mark Normand?

  Oh, that's good for cable.

• 55:47Speaker 02

  That's fucking YouTube numbers.

• 55:49Sam Morril?

  Yeah. Yeah, but how do you know how many of those people are like flipping the chan?

• 55:52Speaker 02

  But that's point seven.

• 55:53Mark Normand?

  Sleeping with the TV on.

• 55:54Speaker 02

  And let's just say DVR plus three, which for the industry, for the folks who are on the industry, they do ratings on how many people watched that night. And then within the next three days, how many people watched it in their DVR? DVR plus three for me was maybe a point nine. So.

• 56:09Sam Morril?

  But then what about like, uh? The first one, can they watch like Father Figure? Is that on YouTube now?

• 56:16Speaker 02

  It's YouTube free now.

• 56:17Sam Morril?

  That's cool.

• 56:18Speaker 02

  Yeah, and it's, but the numbers of my spe- my old specials on YouTube are higher than what they ever were cumulatively on broadcast.

• 56:26Sam Morril?

  Yeah, it's because it's easier to click a link than it is to set a fucking timer.

• 56:29Speaker 02

  Okay, so then I should have took fucking thirty K and shot that bitch myself. And if I'd have shot that bitch myself in twenty sixteen, what the fuck would that number be by now?

• 56:38Mark Normand?

  Million.

• 56:38Speaker 02

  It'd be, it'd be five, six million.

• 56:40Sam Morril?

  Yeah, but you know what?

• 56:41Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 56:41Sam Morril?

  The business was changing and

• 56:43Mark Normand?

  And we didn't know.

• 56:44Sam Morril?

  We didn't know, like, Mark and I had YouTube success with our two thousand twenty specials, but it was an act of desperation. It wasn't like business savvy on our part. It was like, I'm done with this hour. I, it's either this.

• 56:57Speaker 02

  But that's where the innovation comes, which is why, like, yes, I need to quit. I quit. What are you gonna do? I don't fucking know.

• 57:04Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 57:04Speaker 02

  But.

• 57:05Sam Morril?

  Anyway, you can see Roy's new special on CNN, uh, at midnight on Wednesday.

• 57:10Speaker 02

  Bitch, I would never. You know who did a special on CNN that made sense?

• 57:14Sam Morril?

  CQ.

• 57:14Speaker 02

  Yeah, Colin Quinn. I was like, this is the right place for that.

• 57:18Mark Normand?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 57:19Sam Morril?

  Yeah, but more people should have seen it.

• 57:21Speaker 02

  Yeah, red and blue.

• 57:21Sam Morril?

  But more people should have seen that one.

• 57:23Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah.

• 57:24Sam Morril?

  Colin is so, so good and, uh, he's one of my faves.

• 57:27Speaker 02

  But for what these networks pay for an hour, and what you could shoot it for yourself, but you only feel that confidence if you're empowered with the information on monetization. Most cats ain't sharing that knowledge. There's no masterclass for how to do stand-up shit.

• 57:44Mark Normand?

  We'll share it, we'll share it. Step over the race line. Talk to the whites, we'll share.

• 57:49Sam Morril?

  Fucking shoot us a DM or something. I'll talk, I'll, any young comic who's like really, really wants it, I'll fucking answer your DM.

• 57:56Speaker 02

  But see, it's the old ones that need it. Like, there's comics that still make flyers and post G prigs as their sole way of

• 58:05Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 58:05Speaker 02

  reaching people. I'm like, okay, but you need a clip, man, you need some.

• 58:11Mark Normand?

  You hear that, Rich Vos? Selling DVDs out of your trunk.

• 58:17Speaker 02

  I just, I don't know, I, I hate it. I hate it that there's not an evolution. Like, I know.

• 58:23Sam Morril?

  Well, you're maybe speaking into action, man. Maybe, maybe people will, like, I think your energy has always been like, you know, let's talk, let's help each other. I think that's what we hopefully are putting out there as well, you know?

• 58:35Speaker 02

  Do you ever hit a wall of?

• 58:39Speaker 02

  Do you ever hit a wall of not wanting to help people anymore? For feeling like you haven't helped yourself enough? Like, I feel like, like, my reputation in the industry amongst comics is nice guy helpful.

• 58:54Sam Morril?

  Yeah.

• 58:55Speaker 02

  Okay, cool. I try to help when I can and, oh, you need to know how to work this. Oh, you hit a problem with a booker here is what I think you should do. But then, I start thinking, well, you know what? If I can learn all of this, and if I sit down with you, I give you all of this fucking game, and you don't apply it, it infuriates me. It fucking infuriates me.

• 59:18Sam Morril?

  Cause, cause why did you ask? I know, I know what you mean, where it's like these people sometimes that they're like, hey, can I pick your brain? And you're like, yeah, sure. And then, they just kind of talk at you? And I'm like, oh, you didn't, well, you just wanted to complain.

• 59:31Mark Normand?

  Yeah, so I have a day job and two dogs, so I can't really get out to open mics, but I still wanna, how do I get a manager? And you're like, well, you gotta write and get up and hone it and find a voice.

• 59:41Sam Morril?

  But also, you, also, you just have to be like, with your time, cause you feel like you wasted your time then, right? So, you have to be like, is this person, you have to open with, will you take this seriously?

• 59:51Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 59:51Sam Morril?

  And then if they don't, then they don't, but you have to just like, I guess, use your judgment there.

• 59:55Speaker 02

  Bro, as a comic down south, motherfucker told me he ain't moving to New York till he has an agent and manager.

• 1:00:00Mark Normand?

  That's what I'm saying.

• 1:00:01Speaker 02

  And I'm like, okay, well, the way to get one is to build an audience for yourself.

• 1:00:05Sam Morril?

  By the way, what is a manager gonna do if you have no fucking audience?

• 1:00:08Mark Normand?

  Or an act.

• 1:00:09Sam Morril?

  Yeah, like, just try to ma- try to make something happen.

• 1:00:13Mark Normand?

  But I'm not taking advice from you, you were at The Daily Show too long.

• 1:00:15Speaker 02

  Yeah. I just, I allowed my comedy, for the opportunities that The Daily Show and selling scripts allowed me, I traded having my stand-up siloed for a decade.

• 1:00:29Mark Normand?

  Right.

• 1:00:30Speaker 02

  Three specials that cumulatively don't even touch what my Hulu special did globally.

• 1:00:36Mark Normand?

  Wow, that's crazy.

• 1:00:38Speaker 02

  That's, that's, that's on me, you know what I'm saying? So, first thing you do is reshoot all of those jokes. I don't remember who gave me that.

• 1:00:45Sam Morril?

  Kayla Swift that shit.

• 1:00:46Speaker 02

  I don't know who gave me that, yeah, re-record all the songs?

• 1:00:49Sam Morril?

  Yeah.

• 1:00:50Speaker 02

  I'm gonna re-record all three of my specials.

• 1:00:51Sam Morril?

  You gotta relearn all those beats, so that's tough.

• 1:00:53Speaker 02

  It's hard. Oh, my gosh, man, it's so hard.

• 1:00:57Mark Normand?

  You've grown from that guy.

• 1:00:58Sam Morril?

  Yeah.

• 1:00:58Speaker 02

  Cause the day you finish a special?

• 1:01:01Mark Normand?

  Yes.

• 1:01:03Speaker 02

  The joke is gone. You can't even do it.

• 1:01:04Sam Morril?

  There's some facial expressions I make in early specials. I'm like, I don't fucking do that anymore. You ever see a face you make? You're like, and I'm just like, mm, I'm like, what the fuck was that shit?

• 1:01:12Mark Normand?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:01:13Sam Morril?

  I remember I did, Amy Schumer produced both Mark and I's first hour special on Comedy Central. That was the only reason they even looked at our hours back then. And I remember she was like, be more animated in this joke. And you see a couple, there's a couple, if you watch that, where I'm just like, nah, you know?

• 1:01:27Speaker 02

  You goofy white guy face.

• 1:01:29Mark Normand?

  Yeah. She said, you don't smile, you're a serial killer. I was like.

• 1:01:34Sam Morril?

  I remember.

• 1:01:35Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:36Speaker 02

  Amy had you fucking.

• 1:01:38Sam Morril?

  Well, she was so good with faces and stuff. Yeah. She was so good with like expressions on the show and stuff. So then I think she wanted, she was just trying to help, but it was like, but it wasn't us.

• 1:01:48Mark Normand?

  She can act too. We can't really act.

• 1:01:50Speaker 02

  We got a fucking chance. But yeah, like that's, that's, that's what I think more comics should do is just go, hey, here's what I do. And I think this works and helps me with my animation. It helps me reach more people. And I just don't think that a lot of comics, older comics, I don't think that they are all

• 1:02:12Speaker 02

  convinced that they need to learn that.

• 1:02:15Mark Normand?

  Yeah, I know.

• 1:02:16Speaker 02

  You know what I mean?

• 1:02:17Sam Morril?

  Well, it's like a second job, dude. And it's like, we, we all talk about the fears of AI and stuff with like, you know, replacing our standup. But like, there might be benefits to some of this shit with marketing and stuff where it can take some of the load off us, I hope. I don't know. I'm just trying to.

• 1:02:31Speaker 02

  Bro.

• 1:02:31Sam Morril?

  That's true.

• 1:02:32Speaker 02

  So at Montreal this year, we gave George Wallace like a lifetime achievement or like he got some big super duper highest trophy you can get.

• 1:02:40Sam Morril?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:40Speaker 02

  He deserves it.

• 1:02:41Sam Morril?

  Yeah, he's a funny dude.

• 1:02:42Speaker 02

  And I'm doing, I'm writing his introduction. I just started looking at the decades of work he's put in. And that motherfucker evolved and pivoted every time. He's probably, I don't, somebody could Google it. I would bet you he is the oldest comedian on Twitter that's active.

• 1:02:59Mark Normand?

  Oh, damn.

• 1:03:01Speaker 02

  I'm trying to think of old, maybe Lewis Black. I don't know the age differential between, but I feel like George Wallace's been around longer than Lewis Black.

• 1:03:09Mark Normand?

  And he's great on Twitter.

• 1:03:10Sam Morril?

  Starting a business is exciting, but it's easy to get overwhelmed with the details. That's why there's Shopify. It's the commerce platform behind Mattel and Jimm Shark and millions of other businesses around the world. Not only does Shopify make accepting payments a breeze, it helps you design your online store, write product descriptions, enhance your photography, and create marketing campaigns. You can even use Shopify to manage your inventory and process returns. Shopify is great. I mean, this is really something you should look into, guys. Stop trying to do everything yourself. Let Shopify take your business to the next level. Turn your business idea into cha-ching with Shopify on your side. Sign up for the $1 per month trial and start selling today at Shopify.com/Drunk.

• 1:03:55Sam Morril?

  Go to Shopify.com/Drunk. Shopify.com/Drunk. Cha-ching.

• 1:04:02Mark Normand?

  Oh, yeah. Hey, Zipx. Need a nicotine fix without lighting up or clouding the room? Meet Zipx nicotine-infused toothpicks, baby. They give you a satisfying, convenient, and great-tasting way to curb your nicotine cravings anytime, anywhere. Zipx toothpicks satisfy that hand-to-mouth habit, oral fixation, too, and they're available to six-month, six-long-lasting flavors with 2-milligrams and 3-milligram options. Perfect for flights, sporting events, restaurants, anywhere smoking or vaping is off limits. Made right here in the USA and one of the most cost-effective nicotine products out there. If you're not into nicotine, Zipx also offers caffeine and B12.

• 1:04:47Mark Normand?

  Genius. B12-infused toothpicks for a quick energy boost. Zipx has already helped hundreds of thousands of people get their fix with smoke or vape oil. Give your lungs a break and try Zipx today. This is a genius idea. If you're on a flight and you can't rip one, get the goddamn toothpick. And look, I'll take a B12 toothpick when I'm hungover and really get in there. These things are perfect for the road or the bar. No ash, no clouds, just a little buzz that fits in your pocket. Get 10% off your first order with code WMBD at checkout at zippixtoothpicks.com. Must be 21 or older to order. Warning: Nicotine is an addictive chemical. Zip more, smoke less

• 1:05:32Mark Normand?

  with Zipx nicotine toothpicks.

• 1:05:36Speaker 02

  And that's what I'm saying. So you you learn it. You figure out which of these platforms works for your stand up. But George Wallace, man, he has three generations of people coming to see him. And then you only do that if you can reinvent constantly. Like, I feel like I feel like Gaffigan hit a second wave and went back to the fan pool to get another wave of young, young talent. Like John Witherspoon, he used to have droves of like grandchildren at the show, like three generations.

• 1:06:04Mark Normand?

  Movies in the Boondocks helped, like that stuff, yeah.

• 1:06:07Speaker 02

  But it's like, what do you do as a stand up to keep finding the audience? And so if you're a comic of a certain age talking about a certain thing, then somebody under that age ain't fucking with it. And if you outlive your audience, or you outlive your audience's desire to continue to go see live shit. If you put the floor at sixty, maybe sixty five, unless you're the king of all the sixty five, like unless you're Seinfeld where everybody over fifty fucks with you.

• 1:06:37Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 1:06:38Speaker 02

  Then you're losing like, cause like when you're when you're a comic in your in your thirties, I would argue the swath of customers is probably twenty five to fifty five. And as you get older, your floor comes up. And then at a certain point, you're just the guy that if your humor has not evolved and you're not talking about newer, younger shit, twenty two and twenty four year olds aren't gonna come see you.

• 1:07:02Mark Normand?

  That's true.

• 1:07:02Speaker 02

  And so how do you reinvent and or expand your reach within the demographic that fucks with you?

• 1:07:10Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 1:07:11Speaker 02

  Those are the only two ways to sustain and to decade. If we're talking about going into decade number three in your career, then at some point, you've got to find more people because less people are going out after a certain fucking mile marker.

• 1:07:24Mark Normand?

  But don't you feel like with the internet, you can go, who is this guy? They they can find you. If you put all your shit online, young people can find you.

• 1:07:30Speaker 02

  If you put it out.

• 1:07:31Mark Normand?

  Yes, that's what you gotta do.

• 1:07:33Sam Morril?

  Why do you start making those TikToks where you're just like, I'm sad. You're still one of those faces. I'm sad. And then people are like, this guy's talking about mental health. I've reached a young people.

• 1:07:43Mark Normand?

  Right, right.

• 1:07:44Speaker 02

  Yeah, you just gotta find something.

• 1:07:46Sam Morril?

  Play a little fucking chaperone over it.

• 1:07:47Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 1:07:48Speaker 02

  I don't know, man. Find the shit you like to do, figure out the platform where it lives best and do that shit over and over again.

• 1:07:54Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 1:07:55Speaker 02

  Watch rents.

• 1:07:56Sam Morril?

  For sure.

• 1:07:56Speaker 02

  So, I don't know.

• 1:07:57Sam Morril?

  But I do think that people like. You find new people every day with like an old clip even it'll be like, oh, who's this guy?

• 1:08:03Mark Normand?

  Oh, yeah. Well, Seinfeld, I opened for him and he was like, thank God for comedians and cars. I don't know if I'd be relevant without it. I'm like, your show comes on seventeen times a day. You're fine. You're gonna be fine.

• 1:08:12Sam Morril?

  It's a new thing.

• 1:08:13Speaker 02

  He had to reinvent. He had to find a new thing, man. And I wonder if he even knew that that's what he was doing when he did it, when he started it. That shit was a web. It was on like Crackle.

• 1:08:24Mark Normand?

  Crackle.

• 1:08:24Speaker 02

  Crackle was just some fuck off. Like, I'm not shitting on Crackle, but like this wasn't like, yeah, I'm gonna do it here and then we're gonna get acquired and we're gonna do ADF.

• 1:08:32Sam Morril?

  How the hell did Jerry not get a better network than Crackle?

• 1:08:35Speaker 02

  Maybe that's just, shit, that's a good question. Funny or Die was still popping back then, right?

• 1:08:39Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 1:08:40Sam Morril?

  But it's also weird that like, I mean, I literally just thought of Crackle as like that Halloween candy.

• 1:08:45Mark Normand?

  Oh, the little one.

• 1:08:46Sam Morril?

  That with Mr. Goodbar and the Hershey's Dark.

• 1:08:48Mark Normand?

  The Dark, the red one.

• 1:08:49Sam Morril?

  Yeah, Crackle, dude.

• 1:08:51Mark Normand?

  Love Crackle.

• 1:08:52Speaker 02

  Chapter seven bankruptcy for Crackle TV. 2024. I'm so southern, you say Crackle, I think Cracklins, which is Pork Rinds, yeah.

• 1:09:03Mark Normand?

  Damn, wow, Jerry really slumming it with Crackle, but they probably gave him a assload of money.

• 1:09:08Sam Morril?

  And people still watched it. There were no ads, right? You just clicked on it.

• 1:09:11Mark Normand?

  I think so, yeah.

• 1:09:12Speaker 02

  And the episodes were only ten minutes, so there was no science to it even being created to live anywhere but Crackle.

• 1:09:19Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 1:09:20Speaker 02

  Like, he just didn't give a fuck, man.

• 1:09:22Mark Normand?

  It was a weird show when it came out, like, you're gonna be driving around, what? This comedians and cars and coffee.

• 1:09:28Sam Morril?

  Yeah, but he loves, he loves cars. It was like a way to just like, be like, oh, I like this shit.

• 1:09:32Mark Normand?

  Exactly.

• 1:09:32Speaker 02

  Find what you love, find a place where it can live and do it over and over again.

• 1:09:36Mark Normand?

  Yeah, then by the end of it, he's got Murphy on, Chappelle on, like, you know, all the big.

• 1:09:40Sam Morril?

  That Murphy one was good. That was a good app.

• 1:09:43Speaker 02

  I won't name names, but you can tell the episodes of comedians and cars where he doesn't give a fuck about who he's with.

• 1:09:51Sam Morril?

  And then you're like, why did he ask him on?

• 1:09:52Speaker 02

  I don't think he asked him. I feel like that was some Netflix, like, hey, listen, we need to get this person in there. They're new, they're good. You'll like them.

• 1:10:02Mark Normand?

  He's like, Aziz, what? Who's sorry?

• 1:10:04Speaker 02

  Yeah, legit. Like, it's like shit like that where it's like, these are legends, but he just doesn't know them because they're not in his bubble.

• 1:10:12Mark Normand?

  He had, uh, Patton Oswalt on and we just had Patton, we're fans, and he was like, so you do that like weird kinda comedy? You're like a weird alternative guy. And he's like, what? Been around for thirty-five years.

• 1:10:23Speaker 02

  That's a two thousand and three question for Patton.

• 1:10:25Mark Normand?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:10:26Speaker 02

  What's this new alt?

• 1:10:28Mark Normand?

  Yes, exactly.

• 1:10:29Speaker 02

  Brian Posehn, tell me about.

• 1:10:32Mark Normand?

  So you could tell he wasn't too familiar with his work.

• 1:10:35Speaker 02

  Yeah, I, you know, I, I think Seinfeld shines best when he's talking to people he actually connects with and cares about. Look at that shit, thirteen, eleven seasons?

• 1:10:43Sam Morril?

  He's done eleven seasons?

• 1:10:44Mark Normand?

  Unbelievable.

• 1:10:45Sam Morril?

  Holy shit.

• 1:10:47Mark Normand?

  I rewatch this all the time, I love it.

• 1:10:49Sam Morril?

  I like him with Gervais.

• 1:10:50Mark Normand?

  That was great.

• 1:10:51Sam Morril?

  They got, they have good chemistry.

• 1:10:52Mark Normand?

  They have two of those, there's Jamie Foxx.

• 1:10:54Sam Morril?

  That was a fucking great one.

• 1:10:55Mark Normand?

  Great one, and there's Doug Williams, just kidding.

• 1:10:59Sam Morril?

  With Jamie doing voiceover, little commentary. Doug, you can't even do well in a car right now.

• 1:11:05Mark Normand?

  Is all that shifting?

• 1:11:06Speaker 02

  Seinfeld doesn't like me.

• 1:11:11Mark Normand?

  Also, another great thing about this show, he had Rickles, he had Jerry Lewis, he had Carl Reiner, and then now they're all dead. So like, we have another little moment with those guys.

• 1:11:20Sam Morril?

  That is a beautiful thing, like, like Terry Gross on Fresh Air, you can look up like Terry Gross, uh, interviewing like Henny Youngman.

• 1:11:27Mark Normand?

  Whoa.

• 1:11:28Sam Morril?

  She's interviewing Henny Youngman, she's talking to fucking, what's his name, Jackie Mason, these interviews are just like, and it's amazing because it's shit that you don't like, look, was Jackie Mason's comedy for me? No, but he still says shit that, that connects, you still like, he's a comic, so you're like, wow, you get stuff from all these, I remember when Richard Belzer died, they re-released that Fresh Air with him and Terry Gross, and it was a, he was so good in the interview. I sent it to you.

• 1:11:52Mark Normand?

  Yes.

• 1:11:53Sam Morril?

  I sent it to you.

• 1:11:53Mark Normand?

  Yes.

• 1:11:54Sam Morril?

  And list, but, uh, it was, it's cool, man, like, but you're right, these need to live somewhere, especially with the OGs, like Rickles was still fucking great.

• 1:12:02Speaker 02

  You boys been to the Comedy Museum in Jamestown, New York?

• 1:12:06Sam Morril?

  I haven't, I think I'm in it somewhere, I think I did like an interview for it or something.

• 1:12:10Speaker 02

  It's hard to get to.

• 1:12:13Mark Normand?

  Yes.

• 1:12:13Speaker 02

  But it's worth it.

• 1:12:14Sam Morril?

  I gotta go.

• 1:12:15Speaker 02

  It's two hours from the nearest airport, like if you go, if you go Erie.

• 1:12:20Sam Morril?

  What's the nearest airport?

• 1:12:21Speaker 02

  Erie or Buffalo, Erie, PA or Buffalo, it's in Jamestown, New York, it's Lucille Ball's hometown.

• 1:12:28Mark Normand?

  That's right.

• 1:12:28Sam Morril?

  They had that, remember that ugly statue of Lucille Ball, pull it up.

• 1:12:31Mark Normand?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:12:32Sam Morril?

  It was like the worst statue ever, I know they're hard to make and they're expensive, but look at this shit.

• 1:12:36Speaker 02

  But nah, that shit look like Ronaldo. It does look like Ronaldo. It looks like the Ronaldo statue.

• 1:12:43Mark Normand?

  God damn.

• 1:12:44Speaker 02

  But what are the highlights of the? Lucille Ball locked in.

• 1:12:49Speaker 02

  Oh, they redid it. Look at that.

• 1:12:50Mark Normand?

  Oh, thank God.

• 1:12:52Speaker 02

  Lucille Ball was a-

• 1:12:53Mark Normand?

  Statue got worked up.

• 1:12:54Speaker 02

  She got a BBL. She was a beautiful lady.

• 1:12:56Mark Normand?

  Beautiful lady, redhead.

• 1:12:57Speaker 02

  But yeah, shout out to Lucille because the museum was originally a tribute to her. And then she told the people who were building the museum, fuck that, make it a tribute to all of comedy. Wow. And it's literally Smithsonian level artifacts and-

• 1:13:13Mark Normand?

  I think they have a Dangerfield suit.

• 1:13:15Speaker 02

  Yes, they have a bunch of comedy suits in there. So it's like the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, but for comedy.

• 1:13:20Mark Normand?

  Exactly.

• 1:13:20Speaker 02

  Yeah, but it walks you through each era of comedy and style of comedy and comedians who dominated that style. They don't like set them up in like a Mount Rushmore or anything like that. But there's like, they have like a whole exhibit just on working blue.

• 1:13:36Mark Normand?

  Right.

• 1:13:36Speaker 02

  And comics who cursed and, and so then they have a letter- This is the stool that Bobby Stifflaiden sniffed after a woman went to the bathroom. But they have, they have letters that Lenny Bruce wrote while he was locked up. And it's bits. This motherfucker's locked up for jokes and he's in jail writing bits. That's fucking beautiful. That's a, that's a powerful thing right there.

• 1:13:57Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 1:13:57Speaker 02

  Pages of Carson jokes and scripts and transcripts and like teleplays or whatever. Dude, I gotta go to this.

• 1:14:06Mark Normand?

  It's great.

• 1:14:06Speaker 02

  Mel Brooks Blazing Saddles first draft, just on display like the Constitution with the light treated glass so it doesn't get sun faded. Like, it's legit a good fucking time. Like, if you give a fuck about jokes. They got, it covers everything right up to I say about-

• 1:14:25Mark Normand?

  Got young of us.

• 1:14:26Speaker 02

  Yeah, about Mulaney Kevin Hart is where timeline, Kings of Comedy is in there.

• 1:14:32Mark Normand?

  Oh, yeah. We gotta donate money to move this thing to Queens or something.

• 1:14:37Speaker 02

  Bro, it would be a line out the door every day if it were closer. But it really is like, my point is comedians and cars is the closest thing to this.

• 1:14:47Mark Normand?

  Uh huh.

• 1:14:47Speaker 02

  In terms of immortalizing conversations with comedians.

• 1:14:51Mark Normand?

  Yes.

• 1:14:51Speaker 02

  That were like behemoths of their era or whatever.

• 1:14:55Mark Normand?

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:14:56Speaker 02

  But it's, it's fascinating, man. That is freaking cool, man.

• 1:14:59Mark Normand?

  Larry Sanders desk.

• 1:15:00Speaker 02

  That is, oh.

• 1:15:02Mark Normand?

  That's amazing. I was pretty hungover when I walked through, so I feel like I didn't get a full.

• 1:15:07Sam Morril?

  I was there, I think, like, two years before they built it, because I was there for that festival.

• 1:15:11Speaker 02

  Yeah, the Lucille Ball Festival, yeah.

• 1:15:13Sam Morril?

  And I performed in the Copacabana.

• 1:15:15Mark Normand?

  Yes, yes.

• 1:15:16Sam Morril?

  Pretty crazy. And I saw, I saw a Buzz Bryan Regan walk in. I was like, fuck, don't bomb in front of Regan, dude.

• 1:15:23Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 1:15:24Sam Morril?

  And, uh, no, it was fun as hell, though. I mean, they're, they're good people who started this and, uh...

• 1:15:29Mark Normand?

  Oh, the puffy shirt with the fucking Emmy.

• 1:15:32Speaker 02

  Yeah, Seinfeld. Imagine when there's so many Emmys, you can just go, huh, motherfucker, put that one in there.

• 1:15:38Sam Morril?

  But it's like, it is weird when places like, or in, like, like the Basketball Hall of Fame, in Springfield, Massachusetts, and you're like... You can't put it in like a slightly Cooperstown for baseball?

• 1:15:48Mark Normand?

  Cooperstown?

• 1:15:49Speaker 02

  Oh, that's even harder to get.

• 1:15:50Sam Morril?

  These are fucking impossible to get to.

• 1:15:52Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:15:52Mark Normand?

  Cheap land.

• 1:15:53Speaker 02

  I, I went to Coop... This is a shame, as much as a baseball fan I am, only went because I had to interview Bob Costas for that Roku Home Run doc.

• 1:16:02Mark Normand?

  Damn.

• 1:16:04Speaker 02

  And that was a three-hour ride from New York.

• 1:16:07Mark Normand?

  Come on.

• 1:16:07Speaker 02

  There's no plane, there's no, there's just no...

• 1:16:09Sam Morril?

  Why is Costas not on TV anymore? He was so good.

• 1:16:12Speaker 02

  I don't know. I know, I thought he still pops in here and there and does like special broadcasts.

• 1:16:16Sam Morril?

  Here and there, but he's a, he's a legend. He was a great, great broadcaster. And he was very intelligent, like, anytime you hear him go into depth on stuff, you're like...

• 1:16:24Speaker 02

  If I were Bob Costas, I would be content in picking and choosing.

• 1:16:29Sam Morril?

  Yeah.

• 1:16:29Speaker 02

  When I, you know...

• 1:16:31Mark Normand?

  Sure.

• 1:16:31Speaker 02

  Yeah, I'll call that game.

• 1:16:33Mark Normand?

  Right.

• 1:16:33Speaker 02

  You know, yeah, give me, what's that, game of the week? Nah, get that fuck out of here. What's that? Yankees-Phillies World Series? Yeah, give me game two.

• 1:16:42Speaker 02

  I believe he just calls in and just calls his shift. Everybody's just happy to have him.

• 1:16:47Mark Normand?

  Well, what is your most prized comedy memorabilia? Do you guys have something?

• 1:16:52Sam Morril?

  God damn. All right, you go first. What do you got?

• 1:16:54Mark Normand?

  Well, let's see.

• 1:16:55Sam Morril?

  Clearly you've got something in mind, right?

• 1:16:56Mark Normand?

  I have a, a photo with Norm and a text that he sent to a friend of mine that said, "I saw this comic, he's hilarious, Mark Norman." So I've put the text under the picture.

• 1:17:07Sam Morril?

  Whoa, that's, that's pretty cool.

• 1:17:08Mark Normand?

  That was great. Uh, what else do I have?

• 1:17:11Sam Morril?

  This is gonna sound really corny, but when I was in high school, I went to see David Tell of Carolines, and he autographed the playbill for me, and that was like...

• 1:17:20Mark Normand?

  Hey, that's cool.

• 1:17:20Sam Morril?

  And I still have that, so that's like, that's sentimental, because I was like, you know, my favorite comic and... And he was, he was cool then, he's even cooler now.

• 1:17:28Mark Normand?

  That's right.

• 1:17:29Speaker 02

  It's not framed yet, but I have a picture with Arsenio Hall from the Emmys 2023.

• 1:17:35Mark Normand?

  Wow.

• 1:17:36Speaker 02

  Oh, three Star Search. I bombed.

• 1:17:40Mark Normand?

  Pull it up.

• 1:17:41Speaker 02

  And I got ready. Oh, you can't find it, baby.

• 1:17:44Mark Normand?

  You got it scrubbed.

• 1:17:45Speaker 02

  It's a good publicity team. Star Search 2003. You robbed Delaney this? Exactly. All you can find is me telling the story of Star Search. You can't even find the clip. Yeah, you got Letterman. That's oh seven, you bitch. You can't find, you can't find any episodes of Star Search.

• 1:18:00Mark Normand?

  I think that Chappelle.

• 1:18:01Speaker 02

  I don't know if you can stream it.

• 1:18:02Mark Normand?

  Kevin Brennan one's still lurking around.

• 1:18:05Speaker 02

  I did Star Search oh three. That Chappelle's set was killer.

• 1:18:08Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 1:18:09Speaker 02

  And I was getting ready to cuss out B2K. Cause you know, I, I bombed, but you're like defensive, cause people are telling you, you suck.

• 1:18:18Mark Normand?

  Right.

• 1:18:19Speaker 02

  And you don't know how to react. And I'm new to television. I'm like, well, motherfucker. And I'm like getting ready to cuss him. And Arsenio just like gently pulls me back. He just, and like through his teeth, he just goes, uh-uh.

• 1:18:29Mark Normand?

  Oh, that's a friend.

• 1:18:32Speaker 02

  Save my ass, bro.

• 1:18:33Mark Normand?

  Damn.

• 1:18:34Speaker 02

  And like, that's one of those things where, you know, Scarlett Letter, there's no coming back. You're just forever the guy who cussed out Naomi Judd and two young teenage rappers. It's an embarrassment.

• 1:18:48Mark Normand?

  Ironically, that would go viral now and would help you. But back then, that was, you'd be out of the business.

• 1:18:52Sam Morril?

  It wouldn't help you. It would go viral though.

• 1:18:54Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 1:18:55Sam Morril?

  I don't think it'd help. No one's building a career off that.

• 1:18:57Speaker 02

  I got a thank you letter from Letterman.

• 1:18:59Sam Morril?

  Whoa.

• 1:19:00Mark Normand?

  Hey, that's a good one.

• 1:19:01Sam Morril?

  That's honestly a, a career highlight is I did the couch on Letterman on Netflix and like that was like, that was like a career highlight. Cause I was like, I always wanted to do Letterman. I was bummed when it ended. I just wanted to do standup on it. So I think it's cool as hell that you, Mark and I always like talk about how we missed out on that.

• 1:19:15Mark Normand?

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:19:16Sam Morril?

  And, uh.

• 1:19:16Speaker 02

  Oh, wait.

• 1:19:17Mark Normand?

  Oh shit, we got the whole app here, baby.

• 1:19:20Speaker 02

  Oh my fucking lord.

• 1:19:22Mark Normand?

  Oh man, that's good.

• 1:19:24Speaker 02

  I hope it's not me. It, it, keep going. I'm in the back third if it's the comedy part. Cause it was me, John Heffron and Alonzo Boden.

• 1:19:32Sam Morril?

  Damn.

• 1:19:33Speaker 02

  Nope, that's Finesse. No, no, that's, um, DS Sanders. No, that's Steven Scott, dude. That's Steven Scott, but the guy before him was, uh, DS Sanders out of Detroit. Um, this is the week, that was the semifinals week before. Yeah.

• 1:19:47Mark Normand?

  Oh, you're close.

• 1:19:48Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:19:49Mark Normand?

  You're close.

• 1:19:49Sam Morril?

  Way better than Salak used to this.

• 1:19:51Speaker 02

  My shit is the week after that episode, because I studied DS to figure out what to do. And clearly, I didn't do shit that he did. To fucking survive.

• 1:20:01Mark Normand?

  Or, or Steven Scott, I mean.

• 1:20:03Sam Morril?

  Steven Scott did a lot of impressions and stuff.

• 1:20:06Speaker 02

  Yeah, there were a lot of good guys on there. I think Ben Bailey did it, um, Jamie Lissow.

• 1:20:11Mark Normand?

  Oh, wow.

• 1:20:12Speaker 02

  There were, there were, it was, it was a good bunch.

• 1:20:14Mark Normand?

  This is post Ed McMahon.

• 1:20:15Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:20:16Mark Normand?

  Okay, because that's when I was watching.

• 1:20:18Speaker 02

  John Heffron.

• 1:20:19Mark Normand?

  Heffron was big.

• 1:20:21Speaker 02

  Was it, this, this is pre, that was, this is pre Last Comic though.

• 1:20:23Mark Normand?

  Yeah, that's right.

• 1:20:24Speaker 02

  I, I think contest comedy is like a different skill set though.

• 1:20:28Mark Normand?

  Oh, completely.

• 1:20:29Speaker 02

  Like, in terms of joke structure.

• 1:20:31Mark Normand?

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:20:32Speaker 02

  You gotta be broad and fast.

• 1:20:33Mark Normand?

  Yes, yes, exactly.

• 1:20:35Sam Morril?

  Mike Kaplan back in the day was so good at those, because he was quick. He was, it was, he would like go up and tag your joke, and you're like, motherfucker, what the hell?

• 1:20:41Mark Normand?

  I know.

• 1:20:42Sam Morril?

  I mean, you know what he had that was such a good one? Remember his joke where he's like, I'm in a, a, a marriage, it's an open marriage, it's a divorce? We took a broken glass, we put it back together. I was like, these are so quick, these jokes. He would just hit you and hit you and hit you, and you're like, goddamn.

• 1:20:55Speaker 02

  Caps was so funny. We toured together for Last Comic Standing.

• 1:20:58Sam Morril?

  That's right, and, and with Johnnigan and Di Stefano, right?

• 1:21:01Speaker 02

  Johnnigan, Di Stefano, and Felipe Espar.

• 1:21:03Sam Morril?

  Wow.

• 1:21:04Mark Normand?

  What a lineup.

• 1:21:04Sam Morril?

  That's a good five, man.

• 1:21:05Speaker 02

  So, some, it was eighty cities, and so some of the, every city, there was somebody that, like, which one of us is that they're gonna hate?

• 1:21:13Mark Normand?

  Right, right.

• 1:21:14Speaker 02

  Because there was almost no show where all five of us did well.

• 1:21:19Mark Normand?

  Well, you're so different.

• 1:21:20Speaker 02

  Yeah, you pick a demographic, and it's just odd. And I remember Mike Kaplan did a joke, and he goes, um, I went to, and this is like Montgomery, or Greensboro, North Carolina, it's random, and I went to a fast food spot in order to drink, and they said, I said, I'd like a small, and they said, we only have medium and large. I said, well, if all you have is medium, then your medium, therefore, is a small. And like crickets, I'm not doing, I'm not doing the joke justice, but.

• 1:21:46Sam Morril?

  They're like, fucking nerd, let's get it.

• 1:21:49Speaker 02

  Yeah, but that was the sentiment of the crowd.

• 1:21:52Mark Normand?

  Get the joke.

• 1:21:54Speaker 02

  But then we would get up.

• 1:21:55Sam Morril?

  That joke does the, the, the tone of, I've proven a point.

• 1:21:58Mark Normand?

  Yeah, exactly, indubitably.

• 1:22:02Speaker 02

  We would get up to like Boston and Rhode Island and like places where there's like a Jewish popular, and then I get on stage, "Man, the police be pulling us over, don't they?" And they're like, "No."

• 1:22:13Sam Morril?

  Right, right. Not us. We haven't looked into that. You know what, while we're waiting for this, why don't you pull up the thing that I sent you?

• 1:22:20Speaker 02

  No, I'm serious. I don't know if you can find that clip because I combed the internet to make sure that a clip of me bombing.

• 1:22:25Sam Morril?

  Why don't you pull, do you have the thing I sent you, Matt? Okay, Mark's birthday is this week, so I got him a little something. And this is obviously pre-recorded. McGrath?

• 1:22:33Speaker 02

  Is that the house dude that went to jail?

• 1:22:35Sam Morril?

  Mark McGrath from Sugar Ray.

• 1:22:36Speaker 02

  I thought that was Chris.

• 1:22:37Speaker 04

  Yo, what's up to the music, Mark Norman? It is Mark McGrath from the band Sugar Ray, off the charts, but always in our hearts.

• 1:22:49Speaker 02

  This is two minutes long?

• 1:22:50Sam Morril?

  Stay with it.

• 1:22:51Speaker 04

  Speaking of always in our hearts, I understand from your friend Sam that you, Mark, are celebrating a bit of a milestone very, very soon. And that is another trip around the sun for you, Mark, otherwise known as a birthday. That's correct. Sam was kind enough to let me know that you are turning 62 years old. So Sam and I want to say to you, Mark Norman, happy, happy birthday, my brother. We hope you have the best birthday of all time. We hope it's filled with love and joy and happiness and family and friends and music and dancing like no one's watching and food and drink and cake

• 1:23:33Speaker 04

  and gifts and all those things, Mark Norman, that make a birthday so very, very special. Because Sam let me know how special you are. Sam let me know that you're a gigantic, huge fan of the music of Sugar Ray. You love the music of Sugar Ray. You had the frosted chips and all of that. And you have sparrow tattoos on your shoulder because Mark Norman, you just wanted to be Mark McGrath. And I get it. And who didn't? And who doesn't? But there only can be one. And let me spell your name with a K, Mark, because those who spell their names with a C are a different breed, but I know you know that. Also, Sam wanted me to congratulate you on something, Mark, and it's kind of, um, it's kind of sensitive.

• 1:24:18Speaker 04

  But it's something we both have in common. Uh, Sam says, "Congratulations on your penis reduction surgery." And as we both know, Mark, it's a very, very dangerous procedure.

• 1:24:30Sam Morril?

  Oh, wow.

• 1:24:31Speaker 04

  Um, because both of our cocks were just too big. And being an Irishman, we're not known for our big dicks, but mine was gigantic, dude. Gigantic, especially for Irishmen. Mine was at least six and a half, so now I'm coming in at about two and a quarter.

• 1:24:45Sam Morril?

  He's running with it.

• 1:24:45Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 1:24:46Speaker 04

  Sam said, "You're about a buck and a half now, inch and a half."

• 1:24:49Mark Normand?

  So would you give him a couple of bullet points and he ran with it? Oh, that's great.

• 1:24:52Speaker 04

  I'm glad you got through it.

• 1:24:53Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 1:24:54Speaker 04

  It's a tough operation.

• 1:24:55Sam Morril?

  This is glorious.

• 1:24:56Speaker 04

  But guys with big dicks like us, man, it's a cross to bear. Especially if you're really handsome, like me. I don't know you, Mark, if you're handsome or not. Yeah, I think I do. I think I've seen some of your stuff. You are handsome. You are funny. And you are brilliant.

• 1:25:10Mark Normand?

  I'll take it.

• 1:25:11Speaker 04

  Happy birthday, Mark.

• 1:25:12Mark Normand?

  Ah.

• 1:25:13Speaker 04

  All the best to you. From Sam, I'm wondering which of your funny comedian friends, Sam, and there's a few of them. And your new friend.

• 1:25:19Sam Morril?

  I didn't give a last name.

• 1:25:20Mark Normand?

  Ah.

• 1:25:21Speaker 04

  Happy 62nd birthday, but you're probably not a day over 41. Lots of love to you. Sorry about your sayings, but I'm a Giants fan. Happy birthday, Mark. Take care, man. From Sam.

• 1:25:32Mark Normand?

  Hey.

• 1:25:33Sam Morril?

  He killed it, man.

• 1:25:34Mark Normand?

  Thank you. What a guy. That was great.

• 1:25:36Sam Morril?

  Hey, he fucking killed it, I thought.

• 1:25:37Mark Normand?

  I just want to fly.

• 1:25:39Sam Morril?

  Yeah.

• 1:25:39Mark Normand?

  After watching that. Wow. Who knew?

• 1:25:42Sam Morril?

  Who knew?

• 1:25:43Mark Normand?

  We're on the way up.

• 1:25:44Sam Morril?

  He knows you.

• 1:25:45Mark Normand?

  He's on the way down.

• 1:25:46Sam Morril?

  He killed it, though. God bless him.

• 1:25:47Mark Normand?

  That was great. I didn't know he had the humor. He's a funny guy.

• 1:25:49Sam Morril?

  He was fun.

• 1:25:50Mark Normand?

  Thank you.

• 1:25:51Sam Morril?

  We needed something fun.

• 1:25:52Mark Normand?

  I appreciate it.

• 1:25:53Sam Morril?

  Camios are fun.

• 1:25:54Mark Normand?

  I thought cameo was over.

• 1:25:56Sam Morril?

  No, it's rocking.

• 1:25:57Mark Normand?

  All right, well, shit.

• 1:25:58Sam Morril?

  It was between him and, uh, I was like, who's a good, who's a good rando here for you?

• 1:26:03Mark Normand?

  That was very rando. Well played.

• 1:26:07Sam Morril?

  Well, dude.

• 1:26:08Mark Normand?

  Now I'm gonna, now I gotta get you one.

• 1:26:10Sam Morril?

  Nah, nah, nah.

• 1:26:10Mark Normand?

  We'll just keep ping and ponging.

• 1:26:11Sam Morril?

  Let's ping pong. Let's ping pong some random ass cameos.

• 1:26:14Mark Normand?

  Ah.

• 1:26:15Sam Morril?

  Hit me with the lead singer of, uh, OMC.

• 1:26:17Mark Normand?

  Oh, you got it. I'm gonna call Kevin Pollak or somebody.

• 1:26:23Sam Morril?

  You got a book out, dude.

• 1:26:24Mark Normand?

  Jack got Roy's book.

• 1:26:25Speaker 02

  Yeah, pre- pre-ordered.

• 1:26:26Sam Morril?

  Is this your first book?

• 1:26:27Speaker 02

  First ever. I never wrote shit in my life, but this is good. Cause it's all like pain and like.

• 1:26:32Mark Normand?

  Oh, wow.

• 1:26:33Speaker 02

  It's not dark, but it's my pop style when I was 16. So it's just lessons I learned from other men.

• 1:26:38Mark Normand?

  Ah.

• 1:26:39Speaker 02

  Along the way.

• 1:26:40Mark Normand?

  Wow, Nick Cannon's kids are the same story. But.

• 1:26:43Sam Morril?

  I just, dude, I literally just heard him on a podcast say he has narcissistic personality disorder.

• 1:26:48Mark Normand?

  I saw that.

• 1:26:49Sam Morril?

  And I was like.

• 1:26:50Mark Normand?

  He had kids because of trauma.

• 1:26:51Sam Morril?

  You have 13 kids.

• 1:26:52Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 1:26:52Sam Morril?

  We could have told you, you had a narcissistic personality disorder. You wanted 13 more of you.

• 1:26:57Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 1:26:58Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:26:59Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 1:26:59Speaker 02

  Yeah, he admitted that he wished it could have played out differently, but God bless him for having the money to at least try and make it functional. Money's not gonna buy you the time, but.

• 1:27:08Mark Normand?

  Sure.

• 1:27:09Speaker 02

  Yeah. But yeah, my pops, I'm not, you know, I'm the ninth of 11 kids and my mom's.

• 1:27:13Sam Morril?

  That's crazy.

• 1:27:13Speaker 02

  I'm my mom's only kid, but I'm the ninth of 11. So you just don't get the, nobody, like after a certain number of kids, no one gets the same dad.

• 1:27:24Mark Normand?

  Right, right.

• 1:27:25Speaker 02

  Does that make sense?

• 1:27:26Mark Normand?

  Of course.

• 1:27:26Speaker 02

  Like, all right, five through eight, get this version of pops. I got that version. The two after me got a totally different version. Like it's just.

• 1:27:33Sam Morril?

  After you, he was like, I'm retiring, I'm done.

• 1:27:35Speaker 02

  Yeah, pretty much. But yeah, man, it's, it's, it's a, it's a good read, man. I think that.

• 1:27:41Sam Morril?

  Roy's a great writer, man. I mean, definitely check it out. I'm gonna check it out.

• 1:27:44Mark Normand?

  Fascinating story. How did you, did you get any attention? I mean, how do you do that with, how do you guys eat? I mean, that's a lot of kids.

• 1:27:51Speaker 02

  No, it's just me and my mom. We lived with my dad, but they slept in separate rooms. Like my parents were like.

• 1:27:56Mark Normand?

  Interesting.

• 1:27:57Speaker 02

  We're together so you, for discipline, so that he doesn't end up in a gang.

• 1:28:01Mark Normand?

  Wow.

• 1:28:02Speaker 02

  But just don't bring none of them hoes over here.

• 1:28:05Mark Normand?

  Right.

• 1:28:06Speaker 02

  And that was like the, that was a line in the sand between the two of them. So that's not a normal upbringing, especially when you start trying to figure out, well, what does love look like and how will I show it to my son when I find someone? You know, so you have to like start working through all of that shit, bro.

• 1:28:22Mark Normand?

  Totally.

• 1:28:22Speaker 02

  That's the part that sucks about writing a book is that you have to like, all right, well, what's wrong with me?

• 1:28:27Mark Normand?

  Ugh.

• 1:28:27Speaker 02

  And it's not for comedy purposes. You're just writing.

• 1:28:31Sam Morril?

  You're just looking at yourself.

• 1:28:32Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:28:33Mark Normand?

  Oof, that's no fun.

• 1:28:35Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:28:35Mark Normand?

  I hate that. You know when you're getting a haircut and you're like, I gotta look at this the whole time?

• 1:28:40Speaker 02

  Yeah, the mirror.

• 1:28:41Mark Normand?

  I hate the mirror.

• 1:28:42Sam Morril?

  Oh, God. The last guy cut my hair. Way too far out. What are we doing here?

• 1:28:46Mark Normand?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:28:46Sam Morril?

  I gotta get a haircut. What are some, what are some fatherhood lessons you've learned?

• 1:28:51Speaker 02

  I mean, for me, man, one of them was about just not snitching. It's because it's not even just about fatherhood as much as it is the idea of here are the values you need to learn as a man. There was a, there was a comic I used to work with, R.I.P. to Spanky Brown.

• 1:29:05Sam Morril?

  I, I opened for him once in Knoxville.

• 1:29:08Speaker 02

  Oh, at SideSplitters, I'm sure.

• 1:29:10Sam Morril?

  Good, good. We, we were together the night that Whitney Houston died. And Jeremy Lin went for 38 on the Lakers.

• 1:29:18Speaker 02

  And I'm betting money Spank had a joke about Whitney.

• 1:29:21Sam Morril?

  He did. And he was a good dude.

• 1:29:23Speaker 02

  I remember, those are some of the best dark jokes were like.

• 1:29:26Mark Normand?

  He took a bath on that weekend.

• 1:29:29Speaker 02

  Being on stage, like being at a club with comedians right after like some tragedy, there was some comic I opened for. The day Payne Stewart died and his jet crashed. And he was like, Payne Stewart coming in at six under. And I was like, oh.

• 1:29:43Speaker 02

  Oh, fuck. There was, um, I won't say her name because people get mad now, but fucking, um.

• 1:29:52Mark Normand?

  Heidi Flood?

• 1:29:53Speaker 02

  No, this is a Black woman comic. This is the.

• 1:29:55Mark Normand?

  Oh.

• 1:29:56Speaker 02

  I, I, I performed in Macon like three days after nine 11. And she walks on stage with like the most amazing jewelry. It's just glistening. She goes, y'all like my jewelry? Yeah. I stole it off bodies at ground zero.

• 1:30:12Mark Normand?

  Oh, my God. Damn.

• 1:30:14Speaker 02

  I was like, fucking fuck.

• 1:30:17Sam Morril?

  Jesus, did it hit?

• 1:30:18Mark Normand?

  Jesus.

• 1:30:19Speaker 02

  First joke. That's how she came out the gate.

• 1:30:21Mark Normand?

  I respect that.

• 1:30:22Speaker 02

  But Spanky, man.

• 1:30:23Sam Morril?

  The second joke hit 15 minutes later.

• 1:30:28Speaker 02

  So Spank and I were riding down, it's a story I tell in the book, but we were riding down to a gig. And the booker called to cancel. The booker, we're performing at a competing club. And you know how those one night guys, they're very, you don't perform over there? You're one of my guys. How dare you perform over there?

• 1:30:46Sam Morril?

  I hated that, dude.

• 1:30:47Speaker 02

  Fuck you. You haven't booked me in a year. I'm performing over there. Fuck your room. And the guy calls me for, he doesn't know me and Spanky are in the car together. He calls me first to get me to quit, to not do the room. And I'm like, oh, think about, I'm 22, I'm passive. Spank, at this time, he's like 40, 45, he's a fucking grown man. And the guy calls Spank to try and get him to cancel, to basically suffocate the competing room. It's two hours before the show.

• 1:31:13Sam Morril?

  Yeah, come on.

• 1:31:14Speaker 02

  And you're trying to kill the comedy night at the competing room. And Spank goes, you motherfucker, you ain't gave me no fun. And he cusses this fucking dude out, topped about, like a 20 minute just tirade. And I'm just fucking white knuckle like, that's not how you talk to our bosses.

• 1:31:29Sam Morril?

  Wow.

• 1:31:29Speaker 02

  And he go, motherfucker, ain't none of these motherfuckers your boss. You your boss, they are fucking co collaborators.

• 1:31:36Sam Morril?

  Wow.

• 1:31:38Speaker 02

  And it fucking, it changed how I looked at gigs. It changed how I look at the idea that anybody, at least in entertainment, has any control over your career. Cause they try to, all these bookers act like they're the key.

• 1:31:51Sam Morril?

  Yes.

• 1:31:52Speaker 02

  Be nice to me and I'll unlock all the doors for you, kid. And Spank cussed that motherfucker top to bottom and I've been alright ever since.

• 1:32:02Sam Morril?

  He was, he was an alright dude. I like Spanky, man. He was cool.

• 1:32:05Speaker 02

  Yeah, he, he, his, his other mistake to me, or at least what I learned from him, was the importance of dating the right person while you do this. And like the idea that if you have someone, especially if you got a hard job and you with somebody that don't support you or will just get out of your way, you can't be with them.

• 1:32:29Sam Morril?

  Hmm.

• 1:32:30Speaker 02

  And I, and I had a front row seat to a lot of that dysfunction. I kind of get into that a little bit in the book, but it's like the idea of, you don't even realize how much the person, even if y'all just fucking, like even if it's just casual. They can't bring stress into what you do because this shit is already stressful enough. And like, understanding that part.

• 1:32:51Sam Morril?

  What's unfortunate is those women are really good in bed. Yeah. Those crazy ones are fucking.

• 1:32:56Speaker 02

  I feel like you got like five in your head right now.

• 1:32:58Sam Morril?

  Oh, yeah. I gotta call them. I gotta get back with Judy.

• 1:33:07Mark Normand?

  Judy.

• 1:33:08Sam Morril?

  No, the women I'm with hate men way more than Judy.

• 1:33:11Speaker 02

  Yeah, the importance of if you're gonna be with somebody, choosing somebody that actually complements what you do.

• 1:33:19Sam Morril?

  Yeah.

• 1:33:19Speaker 02

  Or is in support of it. Ain't gotta be your lean man, but damn, you can't be no spoiler either.

• 1:33:25Sam Morril?

  That goes for everything. It goes for partnerships. It goes for like working relationships. It goes for be with someone who makes your life easier and who's loyal and good and, you know.

• 1:33:35Speaker 02

  I struggle with that on the professional side, like, like hiring people. It's like, I don't know if you're gonna, especially if I'm hiring you for some shit I know how to do.

• 1:33:46Mark Normand?

  Right.

• 1:33:47Speaker 02

  I'm like, I'll just, it's fine. I'll, I'm not gonna, I'll stay up till three in the morning.

• 1:33:51Mark Normand?

  Oh, same.

• 1:33:52Speaker 02

  I'll edit my own videos.

• 1:33:54Mark Normand?

  Right.

• 1:33:54Sam Morril?

  Yeah, but you can't. You need that time to live. You gotta do shit.

• 1:33:57Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:33:58Mark Normand?

  What I do is, my wife, we have an eight month old, and I'm always on the road. So I just walk in with the check. I hold the check on the walk in, because she's probably like, god damn, I've been changing diapers, getting screamed at, and I just go, there it is? And she's like, alright, alright.

• 1:34:12Sam Morril?

  You're in, she's like, you want us to wire that money? You're like, no.

• 1:34:14Mark Normand?

  No, no, I want the pay.

• 1:34:15Sam Morril?

  I want it, I want it golf style. I want it this big.

• 1:34:18Mark Normand?

  Exactly.

• 1:34:20Speaker 02

  You see that shit where they went broke and they're cutting off everybody's money?

• 1:34:24Mark Normand?

  No.

• 1:34:25Speaker 02

  Bitch, Publishers Clearinghouse filed for bankruptcy.

• 1:34:27Mark Normand?

  What?

• 1:34:28Speaker 02

  And all the people who were promised $5,000 a week for life, there's like, yeah, we ain't got it.

• 1:34:35Sam Morril?

  All those people that were gonna get Bobby Bonilla paid just got fu- dude.

• 1:34:38Speaker 02

  They been getting checks since the 90s.

• 1:34:40Sam Morril?

  Bankruptcy's a bitch.

• 1:34:42Speaker 02

  Yeah, Publishers Clear- they make their money off magazine subscriptions.

• 1:34:45Sam Morril?

  I'm owed a decent amount of money from a studio that went bankrupt, and I was like. My buddy is also owed, who I wrote it with, and we're just like, really?

• 1:34:54Mark Normand?

  Yeah, come on.

• 1:34:56Sam Morril?

  But that's what bankruptcy is. It's like, we don't have to pay you. We're bankrupt. Fuck you.

• 1:35:00Speaker 02

  Yeah, sorry.

• 1:35:01Mark Normand?

  Damn.

• 1:35:03Speaker 02

  Yeah, but the people are trying to sue and shit, but I always feel like if you've gotten 5,000 a week.

• 1:35:09Sam Morril?

  For a while?

• 1:35:10Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:35:11Sam Morril?

  Yeah, but a deal's a deal, right? I mean, it's all, eh.

• 1:35:14Speaker 02

  Yeah, I mean, it is a deal until I don't have the money. I make money from magazines. Nobody's reading fucking handheld magazines anymore.

• 1:35:21Sam Morril?

  You know, I kind of want to go back. I was thinking about going back to newspaper, because when I'm at like the airport or something, I get magazines, I get it. For some reason, it's only an airport thing now for me, but I was like, I kind of like it. I read more when I'm holding it, as opposed to on my phone.

• 1:35:33Speaker 02

  Because you look at articles that you wouldn't have normally clicked the link to.

• 1:35:37Mark Normand?

  Ah, true.

• 1:35:38Speaker 02

  So.

• 1:35:39Sam Morril?

  And you're not distracted to scroll out in the phone and go with a text.

• 1:35:43Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 1:35:43Sam Morril?

  I'm all, dude, I'm going back to hard.

• 1:35:47Mark Normand?

  It's a good shield, too. Like, my dad would read the paper every day, and when that paper was up, you couldn't get around it. Like, you couldn't go, hey, dad, the paper was up. So it was like a nice block.

• 1:35:58Speaker 02

  Sound like you need to write a book.

• 1:36:01Mark Normand?

  He was tough.

• 1:36:02Sam Morril?

  Well, plug some dates, too, dude. Buy Roy's new book and get it on Amazon, right?

• 1:36:06Speaker 02

  Yeah, we was telling some stories on tour. It's not like a, because I hate the word book tour, because it suggests that I'm just gonna be, hey, it's just I'm sitting on stage and I'm pontificating. No, we're telling stories. We're telling stories from the book, make the shit funny. Put some openers in that bitch. More importantly, everybody who comes to the show this fall gets a book.

• 1:36:25Sam Morril?

  That's pretty cool.

• 1:36:26Speaker 02

  It's baked into the price of the ticket.

• 1:36:28Sam Morril?

  I love it.

• 1:36:29Mark Normand?

  All right.

• 1:36:29Speaker 02

  Come watch the shit. I'm pretty much everywhere but the Midwest for right. Well, no, no, I'm in the Midwest. I'm fucking in Milwaukee and Minnesota and I think St. Louis or some shit. No, Charlotte and Durham.

• 1:36:42Mark Normand?

  Nice.

• 1:36:42Speaker 02

  Yeah. I don't have a lot of West Coast. We're getting California at it soon.

• 1:36:45Sam Morril?

  Ooh, we got SF on there and Seattle on there.

• 1:36:48Speaker 02

  Yeah, man.

• 1:36:49Sam Morril?

  Beautiful.

• 1:36:50Speaker 02

  Yeah, indeed, man. But yeah, love you boys, man.

• 1:36:53Mark Normand?

  Hey.

• 1:36:53Sam Morril?

  You guys are the best.

• 1:36:54Speaker 02

  Having me, man.

• 1:36:55Mark Normand?

  Yeah, thanks for coming on. Get the book, everybody. Check out Roy on tour.

• 1:36:59Sam Morril?

  Where are we starting this? So I'm in Paris tonight.

• 1:37:03Mark Normand?

  Woo!

• 1:37:03Sam Morril?

  You probably already missed that. Amsterdam, Berlin, back in Salt Lake City. Second time this year. Wise Guys, November 14th through 16th. Love that club. Them in Reno at the Atlantis Casino, November 29th. Carnegie Hall, December 4th. Hope to see you there.

• 1:37:19Mark Normand?

  Hey!

• 1:37:19Sam Morril?

  Punchup.live/Sam Morrell/tickets. You know, punchup.live/margnorman/tickets. Mark, what do you got, man?

• 1:37:27Mark Normand?

  Well, I just did Huntsville this weekend. I know you're an Alabama guy. What are you, Birmingham?

• 1:37:33Sam Morril?

  Yeah, Birmingham.

• 1:37:33Mark Normand?

  Yeah. Tickets aren't moving. But hey, Valley Center, Harrah's. Then I'm in Magoob's Mall, Baltimore, Lincoln Theater, Chocolate City. Going back to Rochester for a makeup. Niagara Falls, San Diego, and Prior Lake. Nothing better than a casino to get that cash grab and a real bomb. So, yeah, come on out.

• 1:37:56Sam Morril?

  It's a good combo.

• 1:37:57Mark Normand?

  Yeah. Get some bodega.

• 1:37:59Sam Morril?

  Bodega Cat Whiskey.com. Or just DM Matt at Bodega Cat Whiskey on Instagram if you want it in your liquor store, in your bar, because we're making some moves. We want to be there with you. Shout out Comedy Store for putting us on the menu and moving it. Comedy Cellar, we love you. Strip House Steakhouse. Fucking what else? Shade in the Village.

• 1:38:20Mark Normand?

  Shade, Martin's Wine Cellar in New Orleans.

• 1:38:22Sam Morril?

  So many good, no many places carrying it now, and we're grateful. Please hit us up if you want to, especially if you're a comedy club. Hit us the fuck up, dude.

• 1:38:29Mark Normand?

  Yeah, and let's get that shit in Canada. They were all asking for it. They don't have it up.

• 1:38:32Sam Morril?

  Tariffs, Trump. Sneak it in.

• 1:38:35Mark Normand?

  twink, carny.

• 1:38:36Speaker 02

  I'd take it up there for you, but they ain't gonna let me.

• 1:38:40Speaker 02

  I gotta do a little more paperwork.

• 1:38:41Sam Morril?

  Buy Roy's book, guys, and see him on tour. We love you, guys.

• 1:38:45Mark Normand?

  Yeah, comedy.

• 1:39:32Speaker 05

  Now at Kroger, your points add up to more ways to save every trip. Use them your way to take dollars off groceries at checkout, or save at the pump. You can even save up to $35 on your next fill-up. Same points, more choices. And with low prices on fresh, quality food, plus digital and personalized offers tailored to how you shop, your dollar goes further. Redeem your points online or in the app. Kroger, fresh for everyone. Restrictions apply. See cider store for details.

• 1:40:02Speaker 06

  My name is Taylor. The economy is crushing moms like me right now, even working full-time. My paychecks went straight to childcare and all of the bills. Nutritious food is really important to me.

• 1:40:15Speaker 07

  High food costs and changes to nutrition programs can strain family budgets. Your donation helps Feeding America provide the nourishing food families need.

• 1:40:24Speaker 06

  I'm hopeful for stability.

• 1:40:25Speaker 07

  When budgets strain, your gift sustains. Give now at feedingamerica.org/communityresponse.