Kristy Sarah & Bryson Tiller Dating, Angel Reese's Confidence, & The Lip Bar | I Have Some Thoughts Minisode

Welcome back to our minisode series, "I Have Some Thoughts." These short episodes are designed to contextualize the pop culture moments we're currently paying attention to through a mental health lens. Pop culture isn't just fun to chat about, it can reveal important information about how we relate, cope, and understand ourselves. Join us each Friday to hear Dr. Joy share her thoughts about the happenings of the week. This week, we're chatting about rumors of content creator Kristy Sarah dating Bryson Tiller, people waiting on Angel Reese's downfall, and tension related to The Lip Bar wanting to expand their customer base. Stay Connected​https://click.convertkit-mail.com/27uv20p9mpioh8edr34s8ug63w344hg/58hvh8ug08p6wzc6/dGhlcmFweWZvcmJsYWNrZ2lybHMuY29tb3JibGFja2dpcmxzLmNvbS9wYXRyZW9u Wanna chat more about the pop culture hot topics of the week? Join us inside our Patreon https://community.therapyforblackgirls.com/ community. Is there a topic you'd like covered on the podcast? Submit it at therapyforblackgirls.com/mailbox https://www.therapyforblackgirls.com/mailbox. If you're looking for a therapist in your area, check out the directory at https://www.therapyforblackgirls.com/directory. Make sure to follow us on social media: Instagram: @therapyforblackgirls https://www.instagram.com/therapyforblackgirls Threads: @therapyforblackgirls https://www.threads.com/therapyforblackgirls Our Production Team Executive Producers: Dennison Bradford & Gabrielle Collins Director of Podcast & Digital Content: Ellice Ellis Producer: Ndeye Thioubou Production Assistant: Bria Mosley See omnystudio.com/listener https://omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

• 0:00Speaker 00

  This is an iHeart Podcast. Guaranteed Human.

• 0:04Speaker 01

  A rare disease diagnosis can change your life, but it doesn't have to define your future. In season seven of Untold Stories, Life with a Severe Autoimmune Condition, host Martine Hackett continues the conversation with people living with MG, CIDP, and the broader rare disease community, exploring what comes after diagnosis through stories of hope, progress, and connection. Produced by Ruby Studio in partnership with Argenx. Listen on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

• 0:34Speaker 02

  Are you looking for support in your weight management journey? Zepbound Terzepatide may be able to help. Zepbound is a prescription medicine used with a reduced calorie diet and increased physical activity to help adults with obesity, or some adults with overweight who also have weight-related medical problems to lose excess body weight and keep the weight off. Zepbound is approved as a 2.5, 5, 7.5, 10, 12.5, or 15-milligram injection. Zepbound contains Terzepatide and should not be used with other Terzepatide-containing products or any GLP-1 receptor agonist medicines. It is not known if Zepbound is safe and effective for use in children. Don't share needles or pens or reuse needles.

• 1:16Speaker 02

  Don't take if allergic to it, or if you or someone in your family had medullary thyroid cancer, or if you've had multiple endocrine neoplasia syndrome type 2. Tell your doctor if you get a lump or swelling in your neck. Stop Zepbound and call your doctor if you have severe stomach pain or a serious allergic reaction. Severe side effects may include inflamed pancreas or gallbladder problems. Tell your doctor if you experience vision changes before scheduled procedures with anesthesia. If you're nursing, pregnant, plan to be, or taking birth control pills. Taking Zepbound with a sulphonal urea or insulin may cause low blood sugar. Side effects include nausea, diarrhea, and vomiting, which can cause dehydration and worsen kidney problems. Talk to your doctor.

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  Call 1-800-545-5979, or visit zepbound.lily.com.

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• 2:34Speaker 01

  Host Nora McInerney is back for an all-new season of The Head Start, embracing the journey brought to you in partnership with AbbVie. As Nora continues her conversations with people living with chronic migraine, she's also reconnecting with familiar voices from seasons past to see where they are now on their journey. Of course, she'll be joined by headache specialist Dr. Christopher Rhine, who offers insight into these challenges and the questions many of us have. So don't miss season four of The Head Start: Embracing the Journey. Listen on the iHeart Radio app or wherever you get your podcasts.

• 3:12Speaker 01

  Hey, y'all. Welcome back to I Have Some Thoughts, our weekly Therapy for Black Girls mini-soad series, where we are talking about all things pop culture, but of course, from a mental health lens. And Elise is back with me this week. Hey, Elise.

• 3:24Speaker 04

  Hey, Dr. Joy. I'm super excited to chat with you. We have three really good tidbits of like pop culture news to chat through today. So we have something good for the audience.

• 3:34Speaker 01

  Perfect.

• 3:35Speaker 04

  So let's start with influencer Kristi Sarah and singer Bryson Tiller, who sparked dating rumors after being spotted kissing during an outing. The attention comes just three months after Sarah finalized her divorce from Desmond Scott, her husband of more than 11 years and father of her two children. Sarah filed for divorce in December of 2025, reportedly citing infidelity. Since news of the split became public, she shared parts of her rebuilding process with her followers. Her apparent new relationship prompted some people online to tell her to heal before moving on. Sarah responded with a social media post jokingly asking whether her latest wellness treatment was enough healing for everyone, which I thought was kind of clever.

• 4:20Speaker 04

  Meanwhile, people in the comments pointed out that men often appear to face less scrutiny when they begin dating or moving on after a breakup. I've definitely been thinking about this a lot. Why are women expected to prove they've healed before moving on, while men are often allowed to start a new chapter without having to explain themselves?

• 4:42Speaker 01

  Yeah, I think that there are so many scripts and ideas about like what kinds of things women are supposed to do and what we are not supposed to do, right? Like, I think a lot of it is a part of this good girl socializing and like this idea that there is a thing that women are supposed to do. And unfortunately, I think many of us actually fall into it, whether we are conscious of that or not. And I think for men, they are just allowed to mess up and make more mistakes and given more leeway and more grace with their lives in ways that women are not. And I think the difficult part and the most unfortunate part for me is that women are often the harshest critics of other women, right? So you would think that we would be more sympathetic to one another and more lenient

• 5:23Speaker 01

  and give more grace, but I feel like sometimes we are the loudest and harshest critics of other women.

• 5:29Speaker 04

  I also think there's like some parasocial relationship going on here, especially when people are, you know, a lot of influencers, they share their lives, they share their breakups. But why do you think people may be so invested in someone else's healing? And what may that do for themselves? And what are like they may be looking for in that?

• 5:51Speaker 01

  Yeah, I agree with you. I mean, I think specifically in this case, right? Like, so much of their relationship did play out on social. And not that we were like getting intimate details of their relationship, but we knew that they were a couple, right? And then the breakup was very public and shared on social. And so I think a lot of people are just invested. When people are couples' content kind of creators, that that's a part of the allure, right? Like, that's a part of how you imagine your following is that people are invested in the story. But I think we also struggle to realize and remember that these are actual people and that we only see slivers of their lives online. Like, they still have a full, entire life outside of the algorithm. And so I definitely agree with you that there are some parasocial stuff going on.

• 6:35Speaker 01

  But I also think that it is sometimes easier for us to put our energy and attention into what is happening online versus our own lives, because that requires way more work. It's often messier. Sometimes it may not feel as interesting, right? And so sometimes, though not always the case, but sometimes I think we invest in parasocial relationships as a way to avoid what's actually going on in our own lives and paying attention to maybe the things that we could actually be improving or working on.

• 7:03Speaker 04

  I also think about how many content creators, and not that it's a bad thing, talk about dating. And they maybe frame the way in which they talk about dating, although they're pulling from their own lives, as strategies or like, here's what I did. Maybe this may work for you too. And so even if Kristi Sarah, that's not necessarily her lane, I think a lot of people may look at someone who like, oh, I think this person is so successful, such a nice person, so talented, like, they should maybe date in XYZ way. And so when sometimes you're operating outside of that, I think it can be a little bit jarring to people. And so to me, that's a little bit of what's going on there too. It's like, oh, I really like her content. I thought she may have been on like some type of like big healing journey.

• 7:48Speaker 04

  It's like, well, maybe she didn't really need that.

• 7:51Speaker 01

  Or maybe she is, and she still wants to date, right? Like, I don't know that. And it's funny, because we just finished a conversation with Anwar White about dating, right? And like this idea of healing and dating. And you don't, like, those things don't have to be mutually exclusive. Now, you know, if it was like last week, then I think maybe we'd be like, okay, maybe what's going on here? But if it's been several months, and again, we don't know what was going on even before the divorce was finalized, right? And so her wanting to kind of get back out there and date, she's not saying that she's engaged. It's just, it could just be a date, right? And so I think we gotta just let people live and kind of do their own things and not be so focused on everybody else's story.

• 8:30Speaker 04

  Speaking of quote-unquote healing, how do we know when we're genuinely ready for a new relationship or just a new relationship experience versus when we're maybe avoiding sitting with the feelings that come up from an old one? And maybe how do we do a little bit of both?

• 8:47Speaker 01

  Yeah, so I think that if you can go on a date and not compare them to your ex, then that is actually a really good sign. But if you are sitting there, yeah, if you're sitting there thinking about like, oh, so-and-so used to do this, or, oh, this is our favorite place to eat, and we enjoy this kind of thing, like, that probably is indication that it may actually be too soon. But again, kudos to you for trying, right? Because sometimes you don't know that until you put yourself out there.

• 9:11Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 9:11Speaker 01

  But I definitely think that that is an indication that it could be too soon. If you're constantly kind of comparing, or if you're like still actively thinking about the relationship with your ex while you're out with this new person, I think that that could also be an indication. If you're getting ready for the date and you like are falling apart and still very tearful, and you like, you really don't want to go because you don't feel like you're ready, I think that that is also something to pay attention to. But if there's something in you that's saying, I'm ready to put myself back out there. I'm gonna, you know, dip a toe in the dating pool again. I don't think there's anything wrong with like trying it out and seeing how it feels for you.

• 9:45Speaker 04

  Thank you for that, Dr. Joy. And yes, stay tuned for our episode coming out in 2027 with Anwar White. You guys gotta like wait a little. So of course, we have to talk about the WNBA Finals. So the Atlanta Dreams championship run ended in a 68 to 63 game seven loss to the Golden State Valkyries on October 31st, so this past weekend. Angel Reese finished with eight points and 12 rebounds and set a WNBA Finals record with 90 rebounds across the series. Earlier in the finals, clips of her trash talking opponents circulated widely. After Atlanta's loss, critics resurfaced those moments to mock Reese, suggesting that her confidence

• 10:28Speaker 04

  and on the court theatrics had come back to haunt her. At the same time, she has received significant support for helping lead Atlanta to the finals and for her growth as a player. How do you maintain confidence and keep moving forward when you're celebrated by some people, but know that other people are waiting for you to fail, but also do this gotcha like, hey, maybe you shouldn't have been so confident because eventually you're going to suffer some type of loss?

• 10:54Speaker 01

  Mm hmm. Yeah, so I don't know that I'm going to be at all unbiased here, Elise. Many of you know, I'm a huge Angel Reese fan. Angel is the reason why I started paying attention to women's basketball in the first place. So I've been following her career since they won the championship in LSU. And so I think it is really hard because I think that some of that is just like a competitive kind of athletic thing, right? Like trash talking and kind of, you know, a lot of sports is a mental game, right? And so if you can get in the head of an opponent, or if that really gets you hyped up, then I think that that is actually a good strategy to employ. But is it that she just didn't win yet? And the trash talking actually could be successful for her later down the line, right?

• 11:39Speaker 01

  So I think it's all part of the game, right? So it's fair game for like people to resurface those clips and say, oh, kind of gotcha. But that doesn't mean that she's still not going to be successful and has already been incredibly successful. And I think sadly, especially in the, the online world that we are in now, like I think there is a lot of people waiting on downfalls of people that they deem to be successful or prominent in some way. But again, I think that a lot of that is also an avoidance tactic for not looking at the things in your own life that you could actually be working on and like where may you even need to develop some confidence in your own life? Because that's never going to leave Angel, right? Like that is kind of who she is. That confidence is a part of her DNA and is largely why she is so successful.

• 12:24Speaker 01

  But I think there's also a lot of attempts to just humble black women, to want to humble black women and kind of make a smaller when I don't know that it's necessary.

• 12:35Speaker 04

  Yeah. I also would love for you to share some advice for people who are, I don't want to say afraid to be publicly confident, but like are confident, but are worried about the times where they may fail or where they may not succeed or where, I don't want to necessarily say cocky, but like very sure of themselves, but that doesn't mean that everything in their life is going to be just as sure. How do you balance wanting to maintain this high self-esteem, positive energy about like what you're putting out about your work ethic, but also realizing that, hey, sometimes I may fail, sometimes I may have to stop something, sometimes I may not get that grant or get that prize. And in this social media landscape, like people are watching and you said, there can

• 13:20Speaker 04

  be an ah, ha, ha, ha, look at her. She failed at this, she didn't get this. How do you kind of drown out that noise and not feel like regretful about how you may have like carried or believed in yourself?

• 13:31Speaker 01

  Yeah, you know, I feel like this goes back to something I've heard from my mother all my life in that is people will always have something to say, you might as well give them something to talk about, right? So whether you are succeeding, people will have something to say. When you are not doing so well, people will have something to say. And so, you know, to keep up with the basketball conversation analogy, you miss 100% of the shots that you don't take. And so if you don't step into this confidence or go after the thing, even if it is publicly, you will never succeed. But there's a large chance that if you keep going after things, eventually something will land, even if it's not all of them, right? And so I think in this very online world, it can be hard and this idea that you are

• 14:14Speaker 01

  performing online, it can be really difficult to kind of put yourself out there. But that is the only way that you're actually going to succeed at anything is if you actually are out there doing the things, even if it is not always 100% a successful rate.

• 14:28Speaker 04

  Thank you for that.

• 14:30Speaker 01

  More from our conversation after the break. A rare disease diagnosis can change your life, but it doesn't have to define your future. Tune in for season seven of Untold Stories, Life with a Severe Autoimmune Condition, a Ruby Studio production in partnership with Argenx. Hosted by public health and policy expert, Dr. Martine Hackett, Untold Stories, Life with a Severe Autoimmune Condition pushes the conversation within the rare disease community forward. Featuring guests living with MG, CIDP, myositis, SMA, and other rare autoimmune conditions, each episode explores hope, progress, and connection. How does research create new opportunities? How do shared experiences help light the way forward? How do we best show up for each other?

• 15:14Speaker 01

  Tune in to find out. Listen on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

• 15:22Speaker 05

  Snoring, gasping for air during sleep, daytime sleepiness? I'm Shaquille O'Neal, and this shouldn't be anybody's experience. Ask your doctor about Zepbound Trisepotide, the first and only FDA approved prescription medicine for moderate to severe obstructive sleep apnea in adults with obesity.

• 15:38Speaker 06

  Zepbound is a prescription medicine used with a reduced calorie diet and increased physical activity to help adults with moderate to severe obstructive sleep apnea, OSA, and obesity to improve their OSA. Zepbound is approved as a 2.5, 5, 7.5, 10, 12.5, or 15-milligram injection. Zepbound contains trisepotide and should not be used with other trisepotide containing products or any GLP-1 receptor agonist medicines. It is not known if Zepbound is safe and effective for use in children. Don't share needles or pens or reuse needles. Don't take if allergic to it. Or if you or someone in your family had medullary thyroid cancer, or if you've had multiple endocrine neoplasia syndrome type 2, tell your doctor if you get a lump or swelling in your neck. Stop Zepbound and call your doctor if you have severe stomach pain or a serious allergic

• 16:23Speaker 06

  reaction. Severe side effects may include inflamed pancreas or gallbladder problems. Tell your doctor if you experience vision changes before scheduled procedures with anesthesia, if you're nursing, pregnant, plant to be, or taking birth control pills. Taking Zepbound with a sulphonal urea or insulin may cause low blood sugar. Side effects include nausea, diarrhea, and vomiting, which can cause dehydration and worsen kidney problems.

• 16:45Speaker 05

  Talk to your doctor. Call 1-800-545-5979 or visit zepbound.lily.com.

• 16:55Speaker 04

  For our last topic, we're talking about what happens when a black business wants to market beyond its black audience. On a recent panel with Adweek, Yasmin H. Paris, the Vice President of Marketing at The Lip Bar, a black-owned beauty brand, discussed the realities the company faces as a black brand and Target, which we know has come under fire for sunsetting their DEI initiatives, resulting in an ongoing boycott from the black community. After seeing a major decline in sales, Paris stated that The Lip Bar's brand strategy needed to shift and expand past just marketing towards black women. She said, "It's black millennial women will always be welcome and celebrated and uplifted

• 17:36Speaker 04

  at The Lip Bar, but if you're a white millennial woman, then we need to create pathways for you to see yourself too," she says. The financial realities of scaling a business and the cultural responsibility and community loyalty that can come with being a black-owned brand are not always one in the same. They don't always align. Is expanding your audience simply smart business? Or does it risk watering down the identity and values that made the brand resonate in the first place? And I think this is a great question because there are a lot of places that would love to be in Ulta and Sephora where they can reach even wider audiences, but we know that's just not possible. So I'm curious your thoughts on this, Dr. Joy.

• 18:15Speaker 01

  Yeah, I think that there is a way that you can scale and expand and not leave behind the customer base that like has been loyal to you from the beginning. I think the tension often comes though, is that we have seen so many people get that wrong, right? And so I know what black women are feeling because we've seen this story so many times, right? Like we love a product, we invest, we tell all of our friends, we spend all of our money, it does great for our hair, our skin, our, you know, we love the makeup. And then it reaches like mass scale and then the formula changes or it doesn't actually work for us anymore, right? Now, sometimes that is just an artifact of things having to change.

• 18:57Speaker 01

  But sometimes it is like, okay, we know that they are going to stick with us regardless. And so now let's change things up to get this other market share that we want to have in our pocket. So I think that it can be done. I think that very few people have done it well. And I think that this is almost like a PTSD reaction, what we're seeing online, right? This idea that we love this thing, it has worked for us, we've championed this, and will we be left behind, right? Like I think that that is actually where a lot of the concern and the reactions that people are having is that people don't want to feel left behind from a product that they really love. And sadly, that has happened too often, I think.

• 19:36Speaker 04

  Yeah, I definitely think that has happened too often. And I think some people can interpret it as mixed signals when it comes to a commitment to diversity. And I'm curious how much of that responsibility falls on the brand and maybe what should an audience member or consumer understand about the marketplace in general?

• 19:58Speaker 01

  Mm hmm. Yeah, I think most of it actually falls with the brand, right? Because I think that that speaks to like your marketing message and, and I have not seen The Lip Bar have any missteps in terms of that, right? Like I think it has been very clear that this product is made with us in mind. And even as they expand, now, you know, that is still left to be kind of seen, but I think that there's a lot to be said about what we've seen so far. And I think that they have given us evidence that it is a brand that caters to black women and really wants black women to be seen and feel beautiful. And so I think it is almost exclusively with the brand, the responsibility for making sure the marketing message is clear and that the customers that they want to kind of support their product actually feel seen in those things.

• 20:40Speaker 01

  Now, I think as a consumer though, I think it is important for you to pay attention to the marketing that is happening, but also to understand that if we want to still have these products for us, then the, the brand does need to expand because maybe they can't survive just with our dollars alone, right? And so that doesn't mean that our dollars are not enough or not welcome, but that we have to kind of get a bigger slice of the pie so that everybody can enjoy their favorite lipsticks, right? And so I think it doesn't have to be an either or. Like I think as long as the company is focused on the, the correct messaging to the audiences, I think a lot of this actually takes care of itself.

• 21:21Speaker 04

  Well, that is a great note to end on, Dr. Joy. These were some great topics to discuss.

• 21:26Speaker 01

  Thank you, Elise. Another great docket, as always. And if there are things that you'd like to hear us lay in on, you can always send those to us at therapyforblackgirls.com/mailbox. And until next time, take good care of yourself.

• 21:45Speaker 01

  A rare disease diagnosis can change your life, but it doesn't have to define your future. In season seven of Untold Stories: Life with a Severe Autoimmune Condition, host Martine Hackett continues the conversation with people living with MG, CIDP, and the broader rare disease community, exploring what comes after diagnosis through stories of hope, progress, and connection. Produced by Ruby Studio in partnership with Argenx. Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

• 22:15Speaker 05

  Snoring, gasping for air during sleep, daytime sleepiness. I'm Shaquille O'Neal, and this shouldn't be anybody's experience. Ask your doctor about Zepbound Trisepotide, the first and only FDA-approved prescription medicine for moderate to severe obstructive sleep apnea in adults with obesity.

• 22:31Speaker 06

  Zepbound is a prescription medicine used with a reduced calorie diet and increased physical activity to help adults with moderate to severe obstructive sleep apnea, OSA, and obesity to improve their OSA. Zepbound is approved as a 2.5, 5, 7.5, 10, 12.5, or 15-milligram injection. Zepbound contains trisepotide and should not be used with other trisepotide-containing products or any GLP-1 receptor agonist medicines. It is not known if Zepbound is safe and effective for use in children. Don't share needles or pens, or reuse needles. Don't take if allergic to it, or if you or someone in your family had medullary thyroid cancer, or if you've had multiple endocrine neoplasia syndrome type 2. Tell your doctor if you get a lump or swelling in your neck. Stop Zepbound and call your doctor

• 23:14Speaker 06

  if you have severe stomach pain or a serious allergic reaction. Severe side effects may include inflamed pancreas or gallbladder problems. Tell your doctor if you experience vision changes before scheduled procedures with anesthesia. If you're nursing, pregnant, plant-to-be, or taking birth control pills. Taking Zepbound with a sulphonal urea or insulin may cause low blood sugar. Side effects include nausea, diarrhea, and vomiting, which can cause dehydration and worsen kidney problems.

• 23:39Speaker 05

  Talk to your doctor. Call 1-800-545-5979, or visit zepbound.lily.com.

• 23:47Speaker 02

  Hello?

• 23:47Speaker 07

  Hey, it's me, your wallet.

• 23:50Speaker 02

  Oh, hey.

• 23:50Speaker 07

  I was just wondering if we could maybe take it easy this week?

• 23:54Speaker 02

  Absolutely.

• 23:55Speaker 07

  Really?

• 23:55Speaker 02

  Yep. I'm shopping at Food Lion.

• 23:57Speaker 07

  Wait, you mean low prices?

• 23:59Speaker 02

  And MVP savings.

• 24:01Speaker 07

  Oh, you do care.

• 24:03Speaker 02

  Obviously.

• 24:03Speaker 07

  Okay, I feel better.

• 24:05Speaker 02

  Good. Now, let's go get some snacks.

• 24:09Speaker 02

  At Food Lion, low prices and MVP savings make it easier to shop for what you need without spending more than you have to. When your wallet needs a little TLC, head to your local Food Lion or shop at foodlion.com.

• 24:23Speaker 00

  This is an iHeart Podcast. Guaranteed Human.