Session 122: Marisa Abela

I honestly might rewatch it just to feel something… Tell Me What's Wrong at ⁠ passthatpuss.com Follow Marisa! https://www.instagram.com/marisaabela_/?hl=en Follow Me! Instagram | @passthatpuss TikTok | @octopusslover8 Listen to "THERAPUSS" Spotify: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://open.spotify.com/show/1BHDdC0OVuHqZ706FobfOF ⁠⁠Apple Podcasts: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/therapuss-with-jake-shane/id1723626781⁠⁠ Amazon Podcasts: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://music.amazon.com/podcasts/93117357-1f23-46e1-8f26-88f5182a68b8/therapuss-with-jake-shane⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

• 0:12Speaker 00

  Are you ready?

• 0:13Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 0:13Speaker 00

  Marisa Bella is here!

• 0:18Speaker 00

  I mean, no introduction needed on my end.

• 0:21Speaker 01

  Yeah, well, I think for a lot of people.

• 0:25Speaker 00

  She plays Yaz in the best show on television, All Die By That, industry on HBO. And I have been an industry fan since COVID.

• 0:35Speaker 01

  That's great.

• 0:36Speaker 00

  Yeah, we've talked about this. And it took people a minute to catch on.

• 0:40Speaker 01

  Like, yesterday.

• 0:41Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 0:42Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 0:43Speaker 00

  Unfortunately, this episode is gonna contain spoilers, cuz I do need to talk about it all.

• 0:46Speaker 01

  I think so. Also, I think by this point, it's too much to be like, no spoiler. Like, you've gotta get watching it now.

• 0:55Speaker 00

  The character development of Yaz

• 0:58Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 0:59Speaker 00

  reminds me of Daenerys in Game of Thrones.

• 1:01Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah, yeah.

• 1:02Speaker 00

  Kind of, right?

• 1:03Speaker 01

  Totally.

• 1:03Speaker 00

  You want her to win so bad, what the fuck is going on?

• 1:07Speaker 01

  I know. I mean, also, especially if we rewind to the beginning of season one. Like, this is a girl walking in, carrying salads, super vulnerable, super scared, getting bullied at work, not sure if she's ever gonna be able to say anything, like boo to a goose. And suddenly, like, we're here.

• 1:26Speaker 00

  I just feel like she gets screwed over. What was it, the end of season one, was Harper screwing her over with the HR complaint?

• 1:32Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:33Speaker 00

  Season two, how did season two?

• 1:36Speaker 01

  Season two, her father cut her off.

• 1:38Speaker 00

  Right.

• 1:39Speaker 01

  Yeah, so she's left, she has no money.

• 1:41Speaker 00

  Right.

• 1:41Speaker 01

  At the end of season two, and she's locked out of her apartment. She's like fiddling with her keys, and she's locked out of her apartment. Her father's cut her off. So then, season three, she's living with Harper and Rob.

• 1:50Speaker 00

  Oh, I miss Rob.

• 1:52Speaker 01

  I know, I know, me too.

• 1:54Speaker 00

  I miss him.

• 1:54Speaker 01

  She's such a soft, gooey, gushy part of the show that now doesn't exist.

• 1:58Speaker 00

  I mean, that season three finale, I honestly might re-watch it tonight just to feel something.

• 2:04Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. Also, because I think, I mean, there are so many turning points for Yasmin, like... So many turning points for who she like for the evolution of like the woman that we see now in front of us at the end of season four. That's a big one.

• 2:19Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 2:19Speaker 01

  End of season three, that choice, that that choice that she makes.

• 2:23Speaker 00

  That defines the rest of her.

• 2:25Speaker 01

  It totally does.

• 2:26Speaker 00

  Right.

• 2:26Speaker 01

  She makes a choice and she's like, I want that. And then obviously all of season four happens. But I was saying, so I think the biggest turning point for Yasmin as a character, actually, is there's a moment in season two with there's a character Kenny, the Northern Irish. Yeah.

• 2:45Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 2:46Speaker 01

  Who Conor McNeil is like one of my favorite people on the planet. He's so good. And he comes up and she's in a meeting and he he says something to her about the fact that I can't believe you would let this happen to Venetia. And he bullied her for the whole of season one. And Yasmin goes in and for the first time, we see like the gun finger come out and her being like,

• 3:06Speaker 00

  Oh, I remember on the trading floor, right? Yeah.

• 3:08Speaker 01

  And like she, I think that's, that was a moment that I think Mickey and Cora, the writers were like, oh, Marisa could be like a gangster. I don't know about where she's going, but 100%. I think what Mickey and Cora were like, were thinking was where, how far can we push the audience's allegiances? You know, like, this is a woman who has also, the amazing thing about television as like a long form art form, I guess, is you have years to live with a character. So we're not asking people to jump in after like 20 minutes of exposition and being like, and this is how like.

• 3:45Speaker 00

  Right.

• 3:45Speaker 01

  Someone comes to these decisions. We're saying, you've seen everything that happened to her, for her, about her, for like the last five years. This is the culmination of all of those things. How do you feel now? And it's like.

• 4:02Speaker 00

  Okay, so the thing about me is I'm a little stupid in the head. So I actually didn't understand what was going on in season four. Like, I understood that Harper and Eric were short, were betting on the loss of-

• 4:16Speaker 01

  Yeah, Tinder.

• 4:16Speaker 00

  Of Tinder.

• 4:17Speaker 01

  Betting on Tinder losing, that's like, that's what you need to know.

• 4:20Speaker 00

  Right, okay, great, that's what I-

• 4:21Speaker 01

  You got it, 100%.

• 4:23Speaker 00

  Cause I was like, wait, I feel like I'm, but then how?

• 4:28Speaker 00

  And you, that moment, there's this like moment in season four where Yaz realizes what Harper's doing, and she just has this moment of like, she's so not surprised.

• 4:36Speaker 01

  Yeah, 100%, she's wearing that like insane 80s orange shirt. And she's like, why are you hell bent on blowing up like my life? Why can't you be happy for me? And I think it's so interesting, I either meet people who are like, Yasmin, I would walk through fire for her. Or I meet people who are like, can't stand her. Like, she's so entitled, she's so whatever. And I don't necessarily mean now, I think this season is like throwing a spanner in the works for everyone. But from season one, they're like, oh, shut up, like, you know. And for me, but I mean, either way, I'm like, people feel something, so I'm happy. But for the people who loved Yasmin and were like, she's an icon, those are the people I feel sorry for.

• 5:21Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 5:21Speaker 01

  Episode eight, cause I'm like, how do you back that?

• 5:25Speaker 00

  You can't, it's unbackable.

• 5:26Speaker 01

  It's unbackable. It's actually kind of savage, like even if you still back her, you kind of can't say that out loud.

• 5:32Speaker 00

  You can't.

• 5:33Speaker 01

  Cause it's like, it's like, well, she's like, it's-

• 5:35Speaker 00

  Human trafficking.

• 5:36Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's human trafficking.

• 5:37Speaker 00

  But how, like where, where is the money coming from at this point? Cause you see her walk in with these bags with Kiran and Shipka and like all these bags. And you're like, but where is she now making this money?

• 5:50Speaker 01

  Well, someone like Stefanovic, who is the like, the guy that she's hosting the dinner for, will be kind of, I guess, backing her. She's not paying for any of it, so she's kind of- Um, she's like organizing all of it, but they're, these people are sort of funding her lifestyle now. Which means she's kind of at the mercy, again, she's put herself in a situation where she's at the mercy of men who don't necessarily have the best intentions. But this thing of what she's decided to do with Haley's character, it, I, I mean, there's no two ways about it. It's come out of her own head.

• 6:28Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 6:28Speaker 01

  No one's got a gun to her head, forcing her to do this. So, but it's a way of, of, of having control. I mean, like, she's always, even since season one, like, her body and sex in one way or another has been a currency for her. And as she gets older, and I think she, she's become more like numb to her own desires. She's just using that in other people. I mean, it's, it's intense.

• 6:55Speaker 00

  It's intense.

• 6:55Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 6:56Speaker 00

  Was there a moment this season, like, do you discover what's happening when you get the sides? Or when you do like a read through?

• 7:04Speaker 01

  When, when I have a meeting, so we were option for three seasons. I had a meeting with McKee and Conrad when they were pitching season four to us. And I was like, what's the vibe? And they were like, hear me out, sex trafficking. And I was like, what?

• 7:20Speaker 00

  Like, how do we even get there?

• 7:21Speaker 01

  The fuck? I mean, I couldn't understand. But then again, I was like, when they were like, in season three, they were like, hear me out, you kill your dad.

• 7:28Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 7:28Speaker 01

  I was like, what? And I love a challenge, you know what I mean? So I was just excited to kind of get into it with them, you know? And like, I was excited to motivate something that felt unmotivatable. And, um, I just love doing the show. I love the writing. I love like what they allow me to do. That second episode, like.

• 7:50Speaker 00

  My god.

• 7:51Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 7:51Speaker 00

  Well, there's a moment with you and Henry and you're fighting and you like almost hit him.

• 7:56Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, and he winces.

• 7:57Speaker 00

  Yeah, like that. That was my favorite moment too.

• 8:01Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 8:01Speaker 00

  That was felt real.

• 8:03Speaker 01

  It's, it's also so dark, like that thing, someone's saying something to you and you're going to hit them and, and them like wincing. It's like, it's kind of savage to watch. And also that's, that whole scene, that whole argument is just one take, which is like overwhelming. So like, don't fuck this up, you know what I mean? At the other final like minute of that scene, it's like a six minute scene or something.

• 8:23Speaker 00

  Do you think we've seen the end of Eric?

• 8:27Speaker 01

  I don't know. I mean, I don't know. Again, it's kind of that sort of like unforgivable. It's like, it's like, how do you come back from that?

• 8:37Speaker 00

  His performance when he gets that text.

• 8:39Speaker 01

  He's amazing.

• 8:40Speaker 00

  When he gets that text and he's like looking straight out and there his kid is, oh my God, his kid is calling for him.

• 8:46Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 8:47Speaker 00

  And you're like, oh my God.

• 8:50Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 8:51Speaker 00

  And he finally comes to like the point where he's like, this is it for me.

• 8:54Speaker 01

  But what I love about the show is that so often I think the notes that people get, especially with female characters, it's like, it's too unlikable. I don't like, she's unrootable. Like, I don't, uh, like, the audience are never gonna back her. They're never gonna watch them again. And Mickey, the writers are just like, yeah, whatever.

• 9:13Speaker 00

  Right.

• 9:14Speaker 01

  You know what I mean? Like, people are, people exist. We can like push the boundaries of what people are willing to accept. And women especially are like allowed to be very flawed and I will trust that people will still watch them and enjoy them, you know? I love doing that. First of all, like, it's an, it's an opportunity for you to just go crazy. It's so fun. Like when, there's a scene in, in season three when I'm talking to Ken, Eric, yeah, I was talking to Eric, so she's wearing like a lawyer wig. And there's a girl doing like a handstand in the background and they're like on coke and they're like talking at a million miles an hour. And it's just so fun. Like, I know the audience loves that part of the show too. So whenever there's like a go out scene

• 9:59Speaker 01

  and like a go crazy scene, I'm happy for them.

• 10:01Speaker 00

  They also set it up so well. They're like, should we go out?

• 10:05Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 10:05Speaker 00

  And then they're like, yeah, that's when you know like the episode slips.

• 10:08Speaker 01

  Yeah, one hundred percent. And when she says, I wanna do all the thing that lords, do all the things that lords sings about and she's like.

• 10:15Speaker 00

  I think Laura sings about being seventeen.

• 10:17Speaker 01

  And I was like, exactly. I love being seventeen. I'm just like, it's so fun. And I, and I love that for the audience. Like, I love that. I mean, I think that the audience of the show as well is one of the reasons that the show is done so well. Because they are like, they will, they back it, you know? They're like, I want to see these people have so much fun. I wanna see them like, take drugs and party and like, Mickey and Conrad are like, yeah, go on then.

• 10:45Speaker 00

  Does Mickey, did Mickey and Conrad, they're ex-bankers?

• 10:47Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 10:48Speaker 00

  So they, this is all like, where did this idea begin for them?

• 10:52Speaker 01

  I think they just thought, you know, I think that there was a kind of, honestly, I think that was at the time something HBO where they were like, we really wanna do things that are kind of peek behind the curtain of a world that people don't fully understand. And I think they were like, well, we know that, we know industry, we know the finance industry and we can do that. Also, you know, look at like Wolf of Wall Street and what people love.

• 11:13Speaker 00

  Right.

• 11:14Speaker 01

  Sex, drugs and money.

• 11:15Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 11:16Speaker 01

  You know, and like at the core of it, well, that's what industry was about in season one, sex, drugs and money.

• 11:23Speaker 00

  And now.

• 11:23Speaker 01

  And now it's about sex trafficking.

• 11:25Speaker 00

  Literally, I was like watching the finale and I was like, holy shit, I remember at the end of season one, when the biggest thing, the biggest

• 11:33Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 11:34Speaker 00

  thing with season one was the speech that they had to give. Do you remember at the?

• 11:37Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 11:38Speaker 00

  What was that speech that they had to like prove their worth to the company?

• 11:41Speaker 01

  Day, yeah, and and Gus's character was like, uh, short the, short the vics, buy the dip, fuck bitcoin or something like that. And that was like, everyone was like, this is so crazy. And it comes out of nowhere too.

• 11:56Speaker 00

  It, out of nowhere, but it's like, where was she left to go? You, I mean, that sounds horrible because it's like there's like other places left to go other than sex trafficking, but like really like what she was working for Henry's uncle or something. It was very unfulfilled, it seemed.

• 12:14Speaker 01

  Oh, my god. Also, I do think, and maybe I'm crazy, but I think at the beginning of um of of the season, like she's trying to be a good wife to him.

• 12:26Speaker 00

  She is.

• 12:26Speaker 01

  That episode two, like when she's like opening the curtains and she wants to have sex with him and like she wants to, you know, and here's, we know what Yasmin's like in the bedroom. We've seen it in season one, two. This guy doesn't even wanna touch her, doesn't wanna look at her, he doesn't find her, like this, she's so unfulfilled and she's, if her ultimate goal is to feel necessary, this guy is literally saying like, I have maids that do that. I have other people to have sex with. I have other, like, I have drugs to get happiness from. Just blend in, be part of the furniture and like as if that's ever gonna happen, you know?

• 13:01Speaker 00

  Never.

• 13:01Speaker 01

  No.

• 13:02Speaker 00

  Episode two is one of the most insane when that plot twist drops at the end of episode two. And you realize he's talking to his dad. I had no idea.

• 13:12Speaker 01

  I didn't either.

• 13:13Speaker 00

  What do you mean?

• 13:14Speaker 01

  I also like even reading it, I was like, what's going on? And then when we were, when we were like on set, I was like, it's a ghost, it's the ghost of his father. And like, it all kind of came to me in like, also that actor, Jack Farthing is so good.

• 13:31Speaker 00

  Yeah, he's incredible.

• 13:32Speaker 01

  Such a great performance. And Kit is so good in that episode. And like, when he comes in in those Elton John gases and kicking up a storm. And I mean, it was just wild. Like, it was.

• 13:46Speaker 01

  Also, what show was that? Like, we've been doing industry on a trading floor for three, three seasons. We're suddenly in this like manor house in Somerset. And we're just, it's like a period drama. I mean, it was kind of insane, you know? And the woman that played my aunt was amazing.

• 14:01Speaker 00

  She was incredible.

• 14:02Speaker 01

  She was so fat.

• 14:02Speaker 00

  When Yaz kicks her out.

• 14:04Speaker 01

  I know.

• 14:05Speaker 00

  But that line was so cutting where she said like, your father was gonna terminate you.

• 14:09Speaker 01

  I know.

• 14:10Speaker 00

  I was like, oh my god.

• 14:12Speaker 01

  So dark.

• 14:13Speaker 00

  So dark.

• 14:14Speaker 01

  Yasmin takes some punches.

• 14:16Speaker 00

  She really does.

• 14:18Speaker 01

  She gets up.

• 14:19Speaker 00

  She gets up every single time. I'm like, so season five is the last season.

• 14:24Speaker 01

  Yeah, for sure. Officially, it's the last season. I know.

• 14:28Speaker 00

  It, do you think it's gonna ha- like, I feel like every season it gets bigger and bigger and bigger and bigger and bigger. Did you guys think you were getting a season two after season one?

• 14:37Speaker 01

  No way. So like Mickey and Conrad write every season like it's the last one. And that's why at the end you're always like, oh my god. But the fact is, is that the fact that now, if that's how they wrote it, I guess they always, if this is the last one, then we wanna go out with a bang. We don't wanna, you don't wanna hold any punches. But I guess they're always hoping there's another season. Whereas the great thing about season five and what I'm excited for is that they know. It's not coming back. It's their choice. You know, they were like, we, we don't want it to get worse. So like, it's done. So what can they do with that energy if they fully don't even hope it's coming back? I'm, I'm scared.

• 15:16Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 15:17Speaker 01

  Personally, uh, it'll be fun, you know?

• 15:20Speaker 00

  When, what, what point did you realize the show was catching on?

• 15:25Speaker 01

  Um, I think when HBO decided to cast Kit Harrington, I was like, oh, they're they back here.

• 15:31Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 15:32Speaker 01

  Because Kit brings an audience by himself. We all were like, we were really passionate about creating something that people loved and just every day we come into work and we'd like give it everything. The show has a real energy of like, it was never like, and Karen was like, so what are you doing? You know what I mean?

• 15:49Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 15:50Speaker 01

  Or like really amped up about it. But when Kit joined, I was like, oh,

• 15:57Speaker 01

  there are gonna be eyes on now. And I felt that ramp up. And then when it came out, people were just like, I mean, you could just feel it more people on the street are like, I'm obsessed with industry, like.

• 16:11Speaker 00

  On TikTok.

• 16:11Speaker 01

  Yeah, on TikTok, making those amazing, I love like the little like gasping hop and montages or whatever. I didn't even, it just, and this season even more than ever. Um, I want a BAFTA in season three, so that was, thank you.

• 16:28Speaker 00

  Well fucking deserved, by the way.

• 16:30Speaker 01

  Thank you.

• 16:31Speaker 00

  Well fucking deserved.

• 16:32Speaker 01

  That one was like, oh, like people think our performances are like.

• 16:36Speaker 00

  They're brilliant.

• 16:37Speaker 01

  Thank you.

• 16:37Speaker 00

  They're brilliant. They're so like,

• 16:41Speaker 00

  is nuanced the right word? I mean, like, I'm like, yeah, I think like nuances that like, there's just so much depth and, um, what's her name is incredible, Sweet Pea.

• 16:51Speaker 01

  Miriam.

• 16:51Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 16:52Speaker 01

  You know, Miriam and I went to youth theatre together and where I grew up in Brighton.

• 16:55Speaker 00

  Did you really?

• 16:56Speaker 01

  I, we, I, when I, when, I mean, she's younger than me, but what she must have been like, eleven and I was like fourteen. And we were just sort of like skipping around a room and they were like, now be sunshine or whatever. And when she turned up in season three, I was like, Miriam? It was crazy.

• 17:16Speaker 00

  Oh, you had no idea?

• 17:16Speaker 01

  I had no idea she was doing it, but I love her and I think she's so good. And I think the casting in the show is so smart.

• 17:24Speaker 00

  It is so smart.

• 17:25Speaker 01

  Who are these, you know, we were all, it was my first job. I was still at drama school when I booked industry.

• 17:30Speaker 00

  Tell me about like the booking of it all.

• 17:33Speaker 01

  This is so embarrassing. So they were, they were Louis Vuitton trainers. That I bought for the read through.

• 17:40Speaker 00

  Uh huh.

• 17:40Speaker 01

  And I turned up on that day because they were like Yasmin is a rich girl. She's, you know, the, the log line for Yasmin was vulnerability disguised by Prada. And I thought, okay, like I need to like present as like, you know, I was still a student. I had no money, whatever. It's like, I need to present. It's what I knew I was getting this, you know, my first ever paycheck. So with my first paycheck, I went to Louis Vuitton and I bought these trainers. But they were like hype beasty trainers, massive.

• 18:07Speaker 00

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 18:09Speaker 01

  So not Yasmin. So not anything I would like normally buy. I was just like, what says LV the loudest I could possibly see it? Those I bought them and I remember turning up and Mickey and Conrad, the actors looking at me being like, no babe.

• 18:22Speaker 00

  Wait, but you had already booked the part.

• 18:24Speaker 01

  I'd already booked the part. Thank God. Yeah. And the audition was like, Lena Dunham was in the room because obviously she directed episode one. So like Lena Dunham was in the room. Uh, the casting director, Mickey and Conrad. And I remember, uh, I had an audition that was just me. Then I did a chemistry read with Harry for Robert. Then, yeah, I mean, I was, like I said, I was still at drama school. I booked it, um, before I graduated. So I like went back to Rada halfway through episode one to graduate. Like it was insane. I was literally twenty two.

• 19:00Speaker 00

  You were twenty two when you booked it?

• 19:01Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 19:02Speaker 00

  Wow.

• 19:02Speaker 01

  Yeah, it was crazy.

• 19:03Speaker 00

  Do you remember the scene that you auditioned with?

• 19:06Speaker 01

  Yes, it was, um, it was a scene, well, one of them was, uh, a scene, the scene where Kenny puts Yasmin on the bin. And she has to like pitch what she thinks.

• 19:19Speaker 00

  Kenny was horrible.

• 19:20Speaker 01

  He was horrible.

• 19:21Speaker 00

  And you forget that.

• 19:22Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 19:22Speaker 00

  I forgot that in season four until you literally just reminded me that he was like.

• 19:26Speaker 01

  Bullied her at work.

• 19:27Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 19:27Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 19:29Speaker 00

  And then when she tried to like bully someone back, he was like, no.

• 19:32Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 19:33Speaker 00

  So that's why.

• 19:34Speaker 01

  And he was on his like growth sober journey. Yeah.

• 19:36Speaker 00

  But that's why her decisions like make, like they don't make sense because they're horrible. But like you understand why we've, how we've gotten to this.

• 19:45Speaker 01

  How we've gotten to a point. Yeah, for sure. I mean, doing the chemistry read with him was really useful with Harry was really useful. I mean, I remember Harry being like, well, now we're like very, very close friends. And we're halfway through season one, we were like talking and he was like, I thought you were. A bitch in that chemistry read and I was like, what? And he was like, yeah, I remember thinking, oh, she's gonna get it and like, this is gonna be such a nightmare. And I was like, no way. And it's probably great for the chemistry because that kind of was the vibe. But I was no, it was nerves. I was nervous. I didn't really talking to him. He already had the part.

• 20:24Speaker 00

  Right. And you had it.

• 20:24Speaker 01

  I hadn't, I didn't have it.

• 20:26Speaker 00

  Right.

• 20:26Speaker 01

  So it was nerves and I guess I wasn't like, hi, nice to meet you.

• 20:29Speaker 00

  Yeah, yeah.

• 20:30Speaker 01

  Like, hello.

• 20:31Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 20:31Speaker 01

  Let's go. I go here.

• 20:33Speaker 00

  I'm a.

• 20:33Speaker 01

  Get a job, you know what I mean? Yeah. And I really, also, she's the dominant one sexually in that relationship. So I was like, you had, he had the power in the room because he had the job. I didn't. But I was like, don't cuck me, bitch.

• 20:47Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 20:48Speaker 01

  Like, I'm here to like, I'm the boss.

• 20:51Speaker 00

  Did you ever have to do a chemistry read with Mahala?

• 20:53Speaker 01

  No, which is insane because we have the best chemistry.

• 20:56Speaker 00

  Ever.

• 20:56Speaker 01

  Show. Yeah. Yeah. Thank God, by the way, because if the, the show would just be a complete, I don't even know if Yasmin would be a character anymore. If it wasn't for like, that chemistry, it became the love story of the show and it so easily couldn't have been.

• 21:11Speaker 00

  It's the only love I feel like they know.

• 21:14Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, totally.

• 21:15Speaker 00

  Is with each other.

• 21:16Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 21:17Speaker 00

  And it's like, they keep betraying each other and it's like, how, how low is too low for them until there's no going back?

• 21:25Speaker 01

  Yeah. I mean, maybe this.

• 21:27Speaker 00

  Well, you finally see Harper have morals.

• 21:29Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Right, right, right.

• 21:30Speaker 00

  You finally see her be like, what is going on?

• 21:32Speaker 01

  This is her line.

• 21:33Speaker 00

  The crazy, the craziest part of season four was when you were at the, the house in Austria.

• 21:41Speaker 01

  I know.

• 21:41Speaker 00

  And you're looking at the painting and it says, A Hitler.

• 21:44Speaker 01

  I know. I know, I know, I know. And she's like, what the fuck?

• 21:48Speaker 00

  You're at an actual Nazi's house.

• 21:51Speaker 01

  I know, I know, I know. It was insane. It was insane. I literally was like, I, I, I said to Mickey and Conrad, I was like, this is so dark. And like the fact that Yasmin then goes for a walk with her afterwards and it's like, what are we? I, I mean, no, actually that was at the end, wasn't it? But still invites her to the dinner at the, I was like.

• 22:11Speaker 00

  And sits her next to Harper.

• 22:12Speaker 01

  And when she sits at the, on the sofa with Harper at the very end, it's like, I'm really sorry. Obviously I had no idea. Lies, bitch.

• 22:18Speaker 00

  You had every idea.

• 22:19Speaker 01

  Idea. You saw the Hitler painting, but. I feel like Yasmin almost believes it herself.

• 22:26Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 22:26Speaker 01

  She's like, well, you know, everything's kind of excusable. I didn't know that they'd actually be racist like then and there.

• 22:32Speaker 00

  Right, right.

• 22:33Speaker 01

  You know what I mean? Like, it's one thing to have a Hitler painting. It's another thing to be like racist at a dinner table.

• 22:38Speaker 00

  Yasmin just like is full of excuses.

• 22:40Speaker 01

  She's full of excuses. Yeah.

• 22:41Speaker 00

  What do you make of the, her playing her dad's voicemail over and over and over again?

• 22:46Speaker 01

  I think it's a bit like, you know what they tell you Scientologists kind of do, which is like trauma, like shock therapy? How many times can you listen to this thing that is, that has traumatized you?

• 22:59Speaker 00

  Right.

• 22:59Speaker 01

  Until you are completely devoid of like the horrible emotional response from it. That's what she's trying to do. She's like, we're seeing herself like numb in real time. Lot, you know, like I, I see Yasmin this season as like a big kind of like door, like doors being like locked one at a time, you know? And that's the final like clink and she's just like.

• 23:26Speaker 00

  Yeah, a villain.

• 23:28Speaker 01

  Yeah, a villain.

• 23:29Speaker 00

  I mean.

• 23:30Speaker 01

  I don't even wanna say like she's in her villain era, cause that makes it sound like better than it is. Like she's, it's fully like, there's no.

• 23:37Speaker 00

  There's no coming back from what's happened.

• 23:39Speaker 01

  There isn't, but we were about to do a season five, so what the fuck is happening?

• 23:43Speaker 00

  I don't. No. And I'm, are you, when do you guys start filming again?

• 23:47Speaker 01

  August. I have the first three episodes.

• 23:51Speaker 00

  Do you really?

• 23:51Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 23:52Speaker 00

  I don't even, normally I would be like, tell me everything off camera. I don't even wanna know.

• 23:56Speaker 01

  No, I don't think you do.

• 23:57Speaker 00

  I need to experience it.

• 23:58Speaker 01

  I don't wanna know before I go in. I wanna read the episodes as they come. The only time I needed to know ahead of time was season three where obviously in episode six, it's clear that Yasmin's killed, Yasmin's killed her dad.

• 24:13Speaker 00

  Right, so you need to behave as such.

• 24:15Speaker 01

  That from the beginning, cause there was flashbacks, but if there's no flashbacks, I don't need to know, cause Yasmin doesn't know. So like let it happen in real time. But I mean, you know, I read these last two episodes and I was like.

• 24:28Speaker 00

  Are they doozies? Like, like, like, does it put season four on its head, kind of?

• 24:37Speaker 01

  Um, the thing, the great thing about Mickey and Conrad is that they don't go like exposition at the beginning of the episode as to why like, everything has changed now. They back themselves and they're like, oh, we said this is where it was gonna go. So this is where we are, but it's not necessarily like, you know, it's not what you'd expect.

• 25:01Speaker 00

  It never is.

• 25:02Speaker 01

  No.

• 25:03Speaker 00

  It never is.

• 25:04Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 25:05Speaker 00

  I miss pure boy.

• 25:06Speaker 01

  I know, me too.

• 25:08Speaker 00

  I miss the good old days.

• 25:09Speaker 01

  I know, a, a trading floor.

• 25:10Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 25:11Speaker 01

  I said that. I was like, it would be really nice to see, you know, at some point in season five, a big trading floor scene. I don't know where that would happen.

• 25:20Speaker 00

  Or how it would.

• 25:20Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 25:22Speaker 00

  Oh, my God. Well, truly, your performance this season has just been nothing short of extraordinary.

• 25:28Speaker 01

  That is so nice.

• 25:29Speaker 00

  It's true. And I tell you, every time I see you out, I'm always like, oh, my God.

• 25:33Speaker 01

  I love that. Every time I see you out, like, I'm just like, always like, out and about on the streets.

• 25:37Speaker 00

  But you, every time I see you, you're always like, I love you.

• 25:40Speaker 01

  I know, I know, I know, I know. And I really appreciate it. Obviously, it's like the nicest thing.

• 25:44Speaker 00

  Well, you, it's well, well deserved.

• 25:46Speaker 01

  Thank you.

• 25:47Speaker 00

  Louise, do you have any question? Because this is Louise's, today is Louise's Roman Empire.

• 25:51Speaker 02

  I mean, I guess it's not like, there's just so much, there's so much meat to the show. Like Henry, can we talk more about your relationship with Henry?

• 25:59Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 26:00Speaker 00

  I would love to touch on more of that because do you love him? Did you love him?

• 26:05Speaker 01

  Did she ever? I think, I think that he, like, if you're going to marry for money, you don't really ever know fully whether you're in love with someone or not. Like, what they are giving you is so valuable. It feels like love. I also don't think that Yasmin fully understands what like love is. Did she ever like lie in bed thinking, I wonder if he's thinking about me? No, fuck no. But I don't think, and did she about Robert? Yes. But does Yasmin necessarily equate that to love? I don't think so. I think she thinks like, can I visualize a life with this man? Yes. Do I want? Do I want to buy what he's selling? Yes. Am I attracted to him? Yes, like, that's enough for her. Does she love him unconditionally?

• 26:48Speaker 01

  Does she love, would she ever have put him above herself? No, but she would never do that for anyone. Maybe Harper, maybe.

• 26:56Speaker 00

  Maybe.

• 26:57Speaker 01

  At a push. We haven't seen it yet, but like.

• 26:59Speaker 00

  I pray that there's just like, I, I know there won't be, but I need a happy ending for them.

• 27:05Speaker 01

  I know, me too.

• 27:06Speaker 00

  Because like that scene where they're at the bar and she says like, when the fuck are you gonna look after me? And she says, tonight. And they, and you guys like find, you like kiss and you dance and you do drugs and you're like, and it's like, that's the, I think the only moment of like, hope throughout all of season four.

• 27:23Speaker 01

  Yeah, I think the best thing we can see from Yasmin that would feel redeemable to an audience that loves Harper as well, I think would be for her to do something that feels like purely altruist, like purely good for Harper. Like a selfless act for Harper is like what we need from Yasmin in season five.

• 27:42Speaker 00

  We've never seen it.

• 27:42Speaker 01

  No, we've never seen it.

• 27:43Speaker 00

  Like even when Harper was staying at Yasmin's house, Yasmin kind of like held it over her head a bit.

• 27:48Speaker 01

  Hundred percent, a hundred percent, yeah. But I do think like, I think that Yasmin loves Harper more than she's ever loved anyone else on the show. I think she, I think she did love Robert, but I don't know.

• 28:03Speaker 01

  But it's like, it's not, you know.

• 28:05Speaker 02

  Yeah, and I think she loved just how much Robert loved her.

• 28:08Speaker 01

  One hundred percent.

• 28:10Speaker 00

  I miss Robert.

• 28:11Speaker 01

  I know.

• 28:12Speaker 02

  I mean, the garden scene, it just wrecks.

• 28:15Speaker 00

  No, I can't, I can't even talk about it.

• 28:16Speaker 01

  Also, yeah, I've not done a sex scene in this show in a while. I didn't do one in season four, I don't think. That was the last one I did. Was that bench scene with Robert.

• 28:28Speaker 00

  I forgot about that.

• 28:29Speaker 01

  And that was like, it was like, the first time that I think anyone really on the show had like, made love.

• 28:36Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 28:37Speaker 01

  You know, and it was like, it was the least, it was the most sentimental I'd seen the show was that. And there's that whole flashback of like, all of the moments of their relationship. I mean, Mickey and Cora aren't really that, the show is not, is pretty unsentimental and pretty savage. And then you get moments like that and it's like, oh my God, it's so. I, I miss Robert too, and I think that like. I think that he just opens up things for both Harper and Yasmin that is useful for an audience, you know?

• 29:07Speaker 00

  It's just, it would be nice for the final season, one last time to see the whole gang get back together.

• 29:13Speaker 01

  The gang back together, right?

• 29:14Speaker 00

  For like five seconds.

• 29:15Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 29:16Speaker 00

  It's all I could ever want.

• 29:17Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 29:18Speaker 00

  Marisa, what are you therapist about today?

• 29:19Speaker 01

  Oh, my god, okay. Um, let me think about this. What do people normally say? Like, what kind of?

• 29:27Speaker 00

  Anything.

• 29:28Speaker 01

  Anything.

• 29:29Speaker 00

  I'm therapist that I'm like back in the throes of Euphoria.

• 29:30Speaker 01

  Oh, okay.

• 29:31Speaker 00

  Like, I thought I was off it.

• 29:33Speaker 01

  I need to.

• 29:34Speaker 00

  And I'm back on.

• 29:35Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 29:36Speaker 00

  Pretty hardcore.

• 29:37Speaker 01

  Are you enjoying it?

• 29:38Speaker 00

  Because.

• 29:39Speaker 01

  Is it one a week?

• 29:40Speaker 00

  It's one a week. And the thing about Euphoria that I didn't think they would do, that they did, is the characters have all connected again. I thought too much time had passed from season two.

• 29:51Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 29:52Speaker 00

  That like Nate and Cassie were doing their own thing. Alexa Demme was doing her own thing, like every, Rue was doing her, like everyone was off doing their own thing, but they all come back and connect in episode three.

• 30:03Speaker 01

  That's so smart.

• 30:04Speaker 00

  And it gets you.

• 30:05Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 30:06Speaker 00

  And I was sitting there on the couch last night like, fuck, I'm back in it.

• 30:07Speaker 01

  I love that.

• 30:08Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 30:09Speaker 01

  Also amazing to be able to, to bring all of those people, I mean, those like, like A-list celebrities back together. How, I don't know how they managed to do that.

• 30:18Speaker 00

  Well, it took five years.

• 30:19Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's true.

• 30:20Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 30:21Speaker 01

  It's true. It's kind of amazing. Um, I would say that I am pissed about.

• 30:30Speaker 00

  How hot it is in this room? Tell me.

• 30:33Speaker 01

  You know what I'm pissed about? I'm pissed about how far LA away is away from London. That's what I'm pissed about.

• 30:38Speaker 00

  It's far.

• 30:39Speaker 01

  I wish it was closer. I love it here so much.

• 30:42Speaker 00

  Do you really?

• 30:43Speaker 01

  I really do. And I also am pissed about people being like, I hate LA. And vice versa. I'm hate, I hate when people in London are like, I could never live there. Like, and I hate when people here are like, I could never, I hate London. I'm like, how, a lot of people here are like, I hate London.

• 30:59Speaker 00

  What? What is there to hate about London, besides the doom and gloom?

• 31:02Speaker 01

  I, I think the, obviously everyone's like, I hate the weather, but also people are just like, it's not like New York in the. It's not like anything could happen. It's all quite right. And I do get that. But I think you, once you kind of get under the skin of London, it's the best city. I think it's like one of the best cities in the world, obviously.

• 31:21Speaker 00

  Like New York on crack.

• 31:22Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, I agree. I think it's so fun.

• 31:24Speaker 00

  People going in London.

• 31:25Speaker 01

  I know. I think they're like staying at the Corinthia on a press tour and they don't, they're not going anywhere else. You know what I mean? But I love being in L A. I think it's so fun, but I hate the fact that it is eleven hours away on a plane. Can't sleep on a plane, so I'm just sat there like that.

• 31:41Speaker 00

  You can't, you don't even, you can't take anything to sleep?

• 31:43Speaker 01

  I mean, listen, a bit like, I mean, listen, but I hate, usually I'm landing and then I'm going to work. So I, like, I'm like, no, I can't, I don't wanna like, I, I, I'm most, that, that shit stays with me.

• 31:57Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 31:57Speaker 01

  And I'd be sat here right now like, what?

• 31:59Speaker 00

  Right, right, zonked out.

• 32:00Speaker 01

  Yeah, so I, I'm obviously always coming here to work, so I can't. But I, yeah, I wish it was closer.

• 32:07Speaker 00

  I love London.

• 32:08Speaker 01

  Do you?

• 32:08Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 32:09Speaker 01

  What's your favorite thing to do in London?

• 32:10Speaker 00

  I think what I love about London is how, and I say this about Europe as a whole, is how day by day the culture is, as opposed to like, let's think a thousand miles in the future.

• 32:20Speaker 01

  Oh, one hundred percent.

• 32:21Speaker 00

  I think a thousand miles in the future every single day. And that's just like how I was raised in New York, how I was, how I live here. It's like, people can say L A is very day by day, but it's not. But in Europe, it's very like, wake up, what do we do today?

• 32:33Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 32:34Speaker 00

  Let me get my job done for the day.

• 32:36Speaker 01

  Yes, for sure.

• 32:37Speaker 00

  Let me exist as a person today and then we'll figure out tomorrow.

• 32:40Speaker 01

  Well, I think that's also about like, oh, I can just sort of walk around and decide what it is I wanna do and bump into a person and, and, have a kind of like spontaneous moment. Whereas here, that is the one thing, there's no, you can't be spontaneous, really, can you in L A? You have to have it figured out because like you've got to get in your car and drive for a while.

• 32:59Speaker 00

  And I don't drive.

• 33:00Speaker 01

  I'm, I know, that's insane.

• 33:02Speaker 00

  Yeah, it's insane.

• 33:03Speaker 01

  I obviously get Ubers everywhere when I'm here, because I've never, I don't wanna drive on the other side of the road. That freaks me out. I, I can't. So, and I can't imagine living here and Ubering everywhere. That is.

• 33:15Speaker 00

  I know my Uber drivers. I know my Uber drivers.

• 33:18Speaker 01

  Because they probably live like nearby, they go, yeah, yeah.

• 33:22Speaker 00

  Do you get recognized like a bunch in London?

• 33:24Speaker 01

  Yes, in London, it depend uh but the thing is, the difference is, in London, I would get recognized by bankers mostly.

• 33:33Speaker 00

  Oh, is all the bankers watching the show?

• 33:35Speaker 01

  Oh, well, they love it. They're obsessed with it.

• 33:39Speaker 00

  Cause it's real.

• 33:40Speaker 01

  Yeah, it it it strikes a chord for them.

• 33:42Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 33:43Speaker 01

  So in London, I would get recognized mostly by bankers. And obviously, in L A and New York, I get recognized by creatives.

• 33:50Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 33:50Speaker 01

  And it so that's a different feeling, cause you're like, people aren't like Yasmin, they're like, oh my god, the actress that plays Yasmin. And they wanna talk to you about like, the making of the show, or like, you whereas the whereas people in London are like, it's Yasmin.

• 34:08Speaker 00

  Yeah, yeah.

• 34:09Speaker 01

  I'm like, it's not, but.

• 34:10Speaker 00

  Have you ever been like scared to like, play a certain storyline out for Yasmin, cause you're like scared to like portray it?

• 34:18Speaker 01

  Yeah, I was definitely scared about the end of this season. So it's like, it's just, it's so dark. And also, I was like, I was like, are people gonna be okay in terms of their own experiences watching this? Like, that, I think you have to be aware of.

• 34:32Speaker 00

  A thousand percent.

• 34:33Speaker 01

  Aware of, you know, whenever you're getting into kind of areas around like consent and all that kind of stuff, you've got to be careful. Um, in a, in an artistic way, I'm not necessarily scared to like broach difficult territory. I think as an actor, the things I'm usually more scared about are like sex scenes, or like, you know, that's like nerve wracking. Whenever I see that in a script, I'm like, okay, I've got on or there's going to be a day in that month where I am naked in front of a whole room full of people. And I actually find that scarier than the camera that's capturing it, that's gonna show it to a million people, which is, which is weird. Like, I'm.

• 35:14Speaker 00

  Because you can separate it.

• 35:16Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's like.

• 35:17Speaker 00

  You can be like, that's gone now. But when you're actively naked in front of, I can't even imagine.

• 35:21Speaker 01

  Right, because also, when the camera goes down, it's it's me again.

• 35:25Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 35:26Speaker 01

  And that's vulnerable. Whereas, I'm really quite free about the fact that like, that person that exists inside your television isn't me. But the person. That exists when you put the camera down is. So if I'm then still stood there naked, it's like, I'll start, I'll have been like, cameras up. And then as soon as they go down, I'm like this, cause I'm like, that's so exposing, you know? And you, you've just been talking to the boom up about the fact that like his kid is going to nursery tomorrow, you know what I mean? And you're like, I'm naked.

• 35:55Speaker 00

  Right.

• 35:56Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 35:56Speaker 00

  And it's just jarring.

• 35:57Speaker 01

  Yeah, that's jarring.

• 35:59Speaker 00

  When did you know you wanted to act?

• 36:01Speaker 01

  I, well, my mother is an actor and she mostly does theatre, has always done theatre. And I, she raised me sort of, she was a single mother. So when I, when it was at school holidays and stuff, she was in a play, I'd be like in the rehearsal room for her, plays or I'd be in the dressing room while she was getting ready. So I was around it a lot. But at the same time, I knew that it was quite an up and down career. I knew that like, you know, sometimes it went better than others. And like in the years where it wasn't so good, it was kind of sketchy and it was a hard career.

• 36:42Speaker 01

  So I resisted it for a long time. And although I would do school plays and stuff like that, I didn't wanna do it necessarily as a career. I actually was accepted to university to do history with a law conversion and that was my goal. And then when I was going to open days at universities, I was like, I don't care. I like, just don't care. Like, I wanna be an actor, but I'm just scared. And I think I needed the validate. I went to drama school and, and a lot of people don't. But I needed the, I needed an institution like rather to say to me, you're good enough for me to believe it, to commit to a lifetime of being an actor.

• 37:20Speaker 00

  And then did you, were you on a bunch of auditions before industry or was industry one of the first?

• 37:25Speaker 01

  Industry was like, maybe my third professional audition ever.

• 37:29Speaker 00

  And did you like think anything, like, did you go into it thinking like, I'm gonna book this, this show is gonna change my life?

• 37:36Speaker 01

  I have to say, like, okay, no, I didn't know that it was gonna change my life and I didn't. I knew it was good. I'd read enough scripts by that point to know that like, this was really good. Didn't, I wasn't like, I'm gonna get this. But I have to say, I think I like accidentally manifested my whole life. Like I was never like. I was never like, oh, is it gonna happen for me? I think once I got into Rada and once I was, you know, in that amazing creative space with amazing actors and like, surrounded by people that were inspiring to me, I was like, like, you have to back yourself.

• 38:16Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 38:17Speaker 01

  Otherwise, it's such a scary industry. It's such a scary, I mean, you know what it's like when you're, if you're gonna put yourself out there, you have to like, think something can happen from it. Otherwise, what's the point? So when I walked in that room, did I know I was gonna get that part? No, but was I like, if they give it to me, I could do it? Yeah.

• 38:37Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 38:38Speaker 01

  Um, yeah, I was, I was excited. And I didn't think for a second, like, you know, on that first season, like, that I would end up here, about to do a fifth season, really in a show that people think is good. No, I, I didn't know it was gonna be like that.

• 38:57Speaker 00

  Has become.

• 38:57Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's amazing.

• 38:59Speaker 00

  Are you, are you scared to say goodbye to Yaz?

• 39:02Speaker 01

  I am, I am scared to say goodbye. I am, I love, I love playing her. I'm excited for the future, like, what, what, you know, at the end of the day,

• 39:16Speaker 01

  there is something obviously incredible about being in something for five seasons, but also, it's a lot of time, so what does my life look like when I'm a bit more free? I, a part of the great thing about being an actor is like, playing all of these different roles. So I'm excited to see what that brings. But, and you know, you do, you take meetings with people and they're always like, and have you got another season of Industry? And you're like, yeah, and they're like, okay, well, I'll see you then. So that's exciting. But, yeah, I mean, I just hope, my god, like, wherever we end this last season is where she ends.

• 39:55Speaker 00

  And that is the suckiest part.

• 39:57Speaker 01

  Thank God she didn't end here, though.

• 40:00Speaker 00

  Cause they would.

• 40:00Speaker 01

  Yeah, I know, for sure.

• 40:02Speaker 00

  They would.

• 40:03Speaker 01

  If HBO didn't pick it up, like, that would, like, that's the last image of Yasmin lying on that floor, listening to her dad's voicemail. I mean, bleak.

• 40:11Speaker 00

  Really bleak.

• 40:12Speaker 01

  But who knows, the next one might be even bleaker, so.

• 40:15Speaker 00

  I pray it's not, but I know it will be.

• 40:18Speaker 01

  I know.

• 40:19Speaker 00

  And that's the worst part is I know that it was, it's kid, in industry, I feel like there is not a happy ending for anyone.

• 40:25Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 40:26Speaker 00

  Ever.

• 40:26Speaker 01

  I know, I know. I think that maybe Rob got an okay, and he's driving away, I mean, obviously it was like heartbreaking.

• 40:33Speaker 00

  Where did he go off to again? The States, right? Yeah.

• 40:36Speaker 01

  Yeah. Okay. Or San Francisco or something to, to, to sell mushrooms.

• 40:41Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 40:42Speaker 01

  Good babe.

• 40:43Speaker 00

  Good for him. Do you keep in touch with Harry?

• 40:45Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah. My, Harry and I are very close.

• 40:49Speaker 00

  How are you dealing with, like, visibility in the public? How do you handle that? Cause I feel like every season for industry gets bigger and bigger and bigger and bigger.

• 40:59Speaker 01

  Yeah. I mean, it's interesting. I never think of myself as someone who, anyone really, I mean, like, fame. It's so interesting. There are such varying degrees of it in our industry. You see people that are like, it feels crazy for me to talk about fame when like, you know, there are like people that are so famous in the world, you know what I mean? Visi- like, all I care about is having the level of success that means I can book whatever job I wanna do. And like, so for that with industry, I feel like it's a kind of a perfect level of people that watch it,

• 41:43Speaker 01

  especially in our industry, like it enough to think like, she's good, she could do this, you know what I mean? That's great. When I'm not, you know, sometimes when people are like, for example, I was like picking up a prescription the other day at, um, my pharmacy in London and I was like, it was like post-workout, I was like holding like pills like this in my hand and someone was like, can I get a picture? And I was like, I really don't wanna be the person who's like, no. Especially at this point in my career, it's like, who do you think you are? You know, it's not like everyone's stopping me every five minutes on the street, but like, you know. You should, that kind of side of it is a bit, is I guess, a bit jarring, but I just like,

• 42:27Speaker 01

  love that people love the show. And it always depends what they say when people are like, I love, if someone's like, I loved you in Back to Black, or I loved you in Back Black Bag, I'm like, oh, I'm always, I always expect it to be industry. So when it's something else, I'm like, oh, that's so, oh.

• 42:44Speaker 00

  I know, I told you, I loved Back to Black.

• 42:45Speaker 01

  Thank you.

• 42:46Speaker 00

  I really did. I thought you did an excellent job.

• 42:48Speaker 01

  It's very kind of you. It was, you know, it's, it's a big one and it's stressful to take on something that is so, in terms of visibility, you know, that's hard. Taking something on where like, people have genuine, it's one thing where the people think that like, people hate Yasmin or love Yasmin, but they like, at the end of the day, if they're watching industry, it's because they like the show. Whereas when you're playing someone like Amy Winehouse, that's going to just come with opinions that is very difficult to juggle.

• 43:18Speaker 00

  Well, because people are like, you are taking on someone that we know.

• 43:21Speaker 01

  We know, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 43:22Speaker 00

  And we know her. And that was always the thing with Amy was I feel like that people, she was this ingenue that everyone thought they knew.

• 43:30Speaker 01

  Totally.

• 43:31Speaker 00

  And she just completely like rejected that.

• 43:33Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 43:33Speaker 00

  And so you kind of saw that in the way people react to anything done with her.

• 43:38Speaker 01

  Right, right. Also, it's like, they're, like, they have personal connections to her music, which I have nothing to do with, which I completely understand. You know, you're like, if, if that's, if Back to Black is the album you listen to when you were going through your first heartbreak, or when you were like, didn't have friends at school and that was the album that you listened to. And then there's like this girl that's like, I'm about to play Amy Winehouse. You're a bit like, well, that's, she's ma, what are you talking, you know what I mean? I get that. But it's interesting. I, I think that, you know, I think that women have a very hard time with biopics often. People are a bit more like, no, you stay in your lane.

• 44:20Speaker 00

  Yes, yeah.

• 44:21Speaker 01

  And I think that that's hard. And it's hard to watch, frankly, like, you know, young men get away with it in a way that like.

• 44:32Speaker 01

  I just see people, you know, attach to things and then there's an outcry online and then they drop out because, you know, I think it's, it's, it's hard.

• 44:41Speaker 00

  It's almost like we see you as this star.

• 44:46Speaker 01

  Right.

• 44:46Speaker 00

  We see you as Marisa Bella, this star. You also can't be

• 44:51Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 44:52Speaker 00

  this person.

• 44:52Speaker 01

  One hundred percent.

• 44:53Speaker 00

  It's like, almost like all the dudes can get along, but it's like all the, like the woman can't be other.

• 44:58Speaker 01

  And also it's like, was she, I think there's a thing of like, would she have even liked you? You know what I mean?

• 45:03Speaker 00

  Right.

• 45:04Speaker 01

  But it's like, can these two women share a space, you know? And I think people are a bit more like, who do you think you are? That is an icon and who do you think you are? And like, people don't want that from women, which is, it's hard to take, to step into it. What you're saying is you are willing to at least try and fill this space of something that is massive and amazing. And people are like, mm mm, not you.

• 45:29Speaker 00

  Right.

• 45:29Speaker 01

  You know what I mean? And, and that's really, I don't think that's going to change anytime soon, unfortunately. But it's what I love about making Comrade writing industry, like, you know, they're like, be messy. Make mistakes, go crazy. And it really gives us a space to not be so afraid. I mean, you know, I, I remember when I was filming Back to Black, I was like, ah, people are gonna hate this. And I never felt like that with industry. Even when I'm doing something like the end of season four.

• 45:58Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 45:58Speaker 01

  You know, people might hate this, but I'm like, I never feel like people are gonna hate me.

• 46:02Speaker 00

  It's because, yeah, it feels like, I don't know, I, I feel like I view it as such like a people view like, like women as like, we want you to be successful in this bubble we've created.

• 46:15Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 46:15Speaker 00

  The second you join bubbles with another female or whatever, like, exist outside of the space we've created you in, like, it's, you're off.

• 46:24Speaker 01

  I don't want to know. Yeah, exactly.

• 46:26Speaker 00

  Yeah. Well, what's something you like, learned about Amy while filming that? Cause I'm a huge fan.

• 46:33Speaker 01

  Are you? Yeah, me too. I mean, she's just the most amazing artist, I guess.

• 46:39Speaker 01

  I mean, there were so many things, things like, I mean, little stories that were helpful were things like, you know, she had this. She had a bird that she loved and it died when she was twelve. Uh, called Ava after like Ava Gardner and they had a funeral for it. Like she loved animals, things like that. Like. She was so giving. She would always, they were like neighbors that she had that she would always like try and support financially. Incredibly giving, incredibly generous, which I think gets lost in the fact that, you know, in just her reputation and and the the kind of. Uh, the like outbursts that she would have publicly sort of out.

• 47:19Speaker 01

  Shone everything else, but this spirit of generosity and people around her when I was researching for the role would say things to me like. That is so important. She was so funny. Like she could make a whole women people laugh and she was like. She was, you know, she could have been a stand up if she wanted to be. She could have been this. And I think that that was really important. Yes, I'm playing like Amy Winehouse, the singer, but it's like, no, you're paying the person, the person that could have been a million things if she wanted to be. And um, I think the main thing that I wanted to explore was like her capacity for love. Like this woman that like wanted so badly to like be loved and be a wife and a mother. And like, that was the heartbreak for me i- i- in the story was.

• 48:05Speaker 01

  I mean, she couldn't have reached to higher heights in her career, but. A- again, like, where do you play, where where does your value come from? I mean, I think the thing about Amy was that she was someone with like. Actually, a lot of self belief. If anyone had told her she was a bad singer, she'd have been like. As if, like she a hundred percent knew that she was like great in that way. But did that give her the sense of value that she was really looking for as a person? No. And that's why where drugs and alcohol come in, you know, yes, there's like, there's a fear and there's a shyness when someone steps on the stage. And I do think that that. That got to her because she, people thought she was great, so she had to be great every time.

• 48:46Speaker 01

  But really that like that whole came from the fact that like this thing that she was great at wasn't.

• 48:53Speaker 00

  Yeah, fulfilling her. Oh, God.

• 48:56Speaker 01

  It's heartbreaking.

• 48:57Speaker 00

  It's really heartbreaking.

• 48:58Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 48:59Speaker 00

  Do you have a favorite Amy song?

• 49:01Speaker 01

  Um, I think Love is a Losing Game is like one of the greatest songs of all time.

• 49:06Speaker 00

  It's one of those, sorry.

• 49:07Speaker 01

  I found Fuck Me Pumps, though, the first album, more like I.

• 49:11Speaker 00

  I love that song.

• 49:13Speaker 01

  I loved doing all of that album, like, playing that version of Amy was so great, because obviously it's more joyful. So it was so fun to like, play Fuck Me Pumps and do, um, all that stuff, obviously, yeah, but Love is a Losing Game.

• 49:27Speaker 00

  What's that song she has about the guy being gay, maybe?

• 49:31Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah, oh, uh.

• 49:34Speaker 00

  Please go to her first album. What's it called? It's called like, um, It's So Good.

• 49:39Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's so funny.

• 49:40Speaker 00

  It's so quick. She's so witty. She was so witty.

• 49:44Speaker 01

  So witty.

• 49:45Speaker 00

  Oh, Stronger Than Me.

• 49:46Speaker 01

  Stronger Than Me.

• 49:47Speaker 00

  Stronger Than Me.

• 49:48Speaker 01

  Of course. Also, by the way, I had to sing that song a million. I didn't say that. I couldn't even remember the name. I just want to sing that song a million times because it was a montage in the movie. So I sung it in like a hundred different versions of where she was. And it was, I mean, I probably sang that song more than any other song in the film in terms of like how many times I actually sang it. It was, it is, that's what I mean. She's like, she could have been a stand up. That is a hilarious song.

• 50:13Speaker 00

  Yeah, it's a, yeah, it's like you.

• 50:15Speaker 01

  Are you gay?

• 50:16Speaker 00

  Yeah, are you gay? Like, why am I?

• 50:18Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 50:19Speaker 00

  Taking care of you. I feel like all she wanted to do was be so loved and taken care of.

• 50:24Speaker 01

  She needed to be looked after, but at the same time, like, the pure force of personality. I mean, people would say things to me, like, the thing about Amy was, if she decided she was not into you that day, oof, like, it was the coldest place you could possibly be.

• 50:40Speaker 00

  Really?

• 50:41Speaker 01

  Like, she was a savage in that way. Like, when you were in her, when you were basking in her light, it was like the warmest, most beautiful place to be. If she was in a bad mood with you, it was like, not fun.

• 50:54Speaker 00

  Right.

• 50:54Speaker 01

  Like, oh, gave me chills. So I was like, okay, just powerful.

• 50:58Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 50:58Speaker 01

  Very powerful.

• 50:59Speaker 00

  Oh, wow.

• 51:00Speaker 01

  I think one day I'll be able to watch it and be like, at least like proud of the person that. Did that like was the film that for that, you know, it did it. It's it's a hard one for me. Um, but, you know, I, um, yeah, I'm glad it now I'm glad I did it and I'm glad it exists, but.

• 51:23Speaker 00

  Was it tough in the moment when people like had opinions about it?

• 51:27Speaker 01

  It was. It was tough. And it was tough because like, you know, I had to, at the end of the day, it was a film that was like about this one person and I was playing her. I had to promote it. And the question that every, every journalist had asked me was like, how are you dealing with the fact that like no one wants you to be doing this?

• 51:44Speaker 00

  That's what they would say.

• 51:45Speaker 01

  And I'd be like, it's so brutal. And I'd be like, well, you know, um, it was, it's hard, but I, I think the film speaks for itself. I remember and you have to just go, but it's like, why would you ask me that? You know what I mean? What you want to be like is, and there was also a part of me that was like, Amy would tell you to fuck off if you ask her that question. Am I allowed to swear? Cause I feel like I swear.

• 52:07Speaker 00

  Yes. Oh, my God. Yes.

• 52:10Speaker 01

  But I have to sit here like an idiot and and just be polite and like whatever, just like not along. And, and it was, it's brutal. It's horrible. It's so. But so actually, yeah, even more than people than, cause at the end of the day, something like Twitter or Instagram or whatever, it exists until you delete the fucking app and then it's not real anymore. You know what I mean? Like, no one, it's as real as you make it. So you can be there like doom scrolling. I deleted Instagram. I didn't have Instagram for like nine months. Cause the day, the first day I was on set was in Soho and there were paparazzi pictures and they went out. And it was like, everyone was like, boo, you know, and it freaks, I was like, it was so jarring, but I was just like, delete.

• 52:54Speaker 00

  And then it was.

• 52:55Speaker 01

  And I've got to do my job. At the end of the day,

• 52:56Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 52:57Speaker 01

  I can't not turn up to work tomorrow. So I have to turn up to work, work tomorrow and.

• 53:02Speaker 01

  Believe it and do it. How can I create an environment where I can do my job? So I just deleted the app and I didn't see it. So it wasn't real until people would tell me it was. And like, you know, it's always, it's always the people that are like, um, you know, you're like, okay, I'll never, I know you're not my friend. You know what I mean?

• 53:22Speaker 00

  How you doing?

• 53:23Speaker 01

  Yeah, they're like, oh my God, I couldn't do that. I couldn't do it. You're so strong. I could not do it. I'm like, okay, you're saying I couldn't like do the job where like everyone hate, like, don't tell me that.

• 53:33Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 53:33Speaker 01

  You know what I mean? I don't.

• 53:34Speaker 00

  Cause you're being them.

• 53:35Speaker 01

  Yeah, exactly. I want you as my friend to lie to me right now and say, it's not even that la- like, it's not even that.

• 53:41Speaker 00

  Fuck that.

• 53:41Speaker 01

  Who cares? Like there is, everyone like is gonna be amazed by, you know what I mean?

• 53:46Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 53:46Speaker 01

  You, that's what you need in those moments. So, um, that was harder was like the, when people, you know what I mean? But I, I is, I think, I think it taught me a lesson of like what it is I want from my career. Like when I, when I take a job, why am I taking it? Like what kind of characters do I want to explore? And I need to be able to, when I'm doing promotion for something, back it. I need to be able to because otherwise it's a long, it's a long slog, this job, you know? You can't just, it's not the three months that you're filming or the six months or the one month or the whatever. It's like, these things exist now and they're online and they're on Amazon or they're on whatever. People are gonna be able to watch it forever. So you need to be able to back it.

• 54:31Speaker 00

  A thousand percent.

• 54:34Speaker 01

  But I remember you saying to me, and I mean, I don't know if it's too much, but I remember you saying to me like, there's a community, you, like online that you're like, you don't know whether they, like people fully accept you. And they mean it's the same thing.

• 54:49Speaker 00

  Oh no, yes, yes, yes. Yes. Yeah. I said this to you at the Oscar night. Yeah.

• 54:54Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 54:54Speaker 00

  Yeah. And then, oh my God, that week after was.

• 54:57Speaker 01

  Was it?

• 54:58Speaker 00

  Yes. Oh my God, I got destroyed.

• 55:01Speaker 01

  Why?

• 55:02Speaker 00

  Because people thought I did a, a bad job on the carpet, which was whatever. But what I realized though, at the end of it is that like, Well, I'm still breathing.

• 55:11Speaker 01

  Exactly, exactly.

• 55:13Speaker 00

  And I'm like.

• 55:14Speaker 01

  And I'm like, what's the worst that could happen? What just happened? And I'm still doing it.

• 55:19Speaker 00

  And it's crazy because I always thought people, I would always say, I'm so scared to get in trouble. I always think about it, like going to the, like getting in trouble, like with the, like my audience or with people watching me. And then I was so petrified of it, so petrified of it, it like consumed my entire being. It still somewhat does. But then at the end of the week, when I was still alive and breathing and like, I was like, oh.

• 55:44Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 55:44Speaker 00

  I still have my friends.

• 55:45Speaker 01

  Yeah, of course.

• 55:46Speaker 00

  I still have my bed.

• 55:47Speaker 01

  That's it, isn't it? You're like, everyone's going to be ashamed of me to like be around.

• 55:52Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 55:53Speaker 01

  There's a panic that sets in. At the end of the day, there must be a reason that we do this and like put ourselves in the firing line, all of it. Because you want to be validated. You want people to be like, I love watching you. You know what I mean? I love, I agree with you. I love, like, and so, so when you put yourself in the firing line and the exact opposite happens, you're like, oh, no. This feels bad. And of course it does, like evolutionarily even like, think about it. You're being like cast out by the like, you know what I mean?

• 56:25Speaker 00

  People that you're begging to accept you.

• 56:27Speaker 01

  It is so jarring and it feels like fight or flight. It feels like panic.

• 56:32Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 56:33Speaker 01

  But you have to, it's really hard to kind of separate your worth from that thing and be like, oh, I can still do my job. I can still carry on and I can still, it doesn't mean, but that, that what's hard is that you also have to not believe people when they say you're amazing.

• 56:48Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 56:49Speaker 01

  Because you can't be like, oh, I don't agree when you say I do a horrible job, but when you say I do a great job, I believe you.

• 56:55Speaker 00

  You just have to have that like intrinsic faith of like trudging forward, like no matter what noise, good or bad. And it's so easy to be taken by both.

• 57:05Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 57:07Speaker 00

  But I remember I had to do a recording that week in the height of like when everyone was really angry at me. And I remember I was like. Oh my god, this, I thought they were gonna cancel. Like, I thought all my recordings were gonna cancel.

• 57:19Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 57:20Speaker 00

  And then I, I, do you remember that? And I walked in and I was like, well, I'm so surprised you guys are here, like da da da. And they were like, girl, who cares?

• 57:28Speaker 01

  Who cares?

• 57:28Speaker 00

  They were like-

• 57:29Speaker 01

  Also, the other thing is, is that I think if you've got a good community around you, people within our industry that like, if anything, when I see that happen to someone, my instinct is to be like, no.

• 57:41Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 57:41Speaker 01

  Don't do that to them. You know what I mean?

• 57:42Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 57:43Speaker 01

  Like, don't, that's so, because it's so, it's just so stupid. You know, it's like, it's like, this is, at the end of the day, it's, it's not, it's not life or death. Like, it's not, it's-

• 57:55Speaker 00

  There are real things in this world that are life and death.

• 57:57Speaker 01

  Right.

• 57:58Speaker 00

  And people don't give that the attention they give-

• 58:01Speaker 01

  No.

• 58:02Speaker 00

  To fashion-

• 58:03Speaker 01

  Hundred percent.

• 58:04Speaker 00

  People online. It is like the craziest thing.

• 58:06Speaker 01

  Political situations where people can genuinely get away with murder.

• 58:10Speaker 00

  Legitimate murder.

• 58:11Speaker 01

  And we're like, you know, my like wig is to the side and people are like, never again.

• 58:19Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 58:19Speaker 01

  It's canceled. It's crazy.

• 58:21Speaker 00

  It's crazy.

• 58:22Speaker 01

  But even like, like also people, it doesn't matter to anyone else as much as it matters to you. Like, I didn't even, you know what I mean? I didn't even see that. I had no idea that that, that happened to you.

• 58:31Speaker 00

  Right.

• 58:31Speaker 01

  And you, but to you, it feels like-

• 58:33Speaker 00

  The end of the world.

• 58:34Speaker 01

  No one's ever gonna wanna work with me again. I remember saying that to my agents after, after that. I was like, people are gonna be like, oh, poor girl, she was good in industry. It's such a shame we can never work with her again.

• 58:44Speaker 00

  You felt that way?

• 58:45Speaker 01

  Oh, one hundred percent. Yeah. I felt like I was like, it was like, it, like you say, it's like, it's like you become like a virus.

• 58:54Speaker 00

  Yeah, yeah.

• 58:55Speaker 01

  You take on this virus of like hatred that other people are pouring onto you. You didn't do anything necessarily to deserve it. But it's like, once you're contaminated by it, everyone's like, got a hazmat suit on and they're like-

• 59:07Speaker 00

  Peace.

• 59:07Speaker 01

  Peace.

• 59:08Speaker 00

  And that's the, and that's why it's like that, if that made me realize anything, it's like, oh my god, I'm so grateful I have real friends.

• 59:15Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 59:16Speaker 00

  Cause there are certain people that don't have friends.

• 59:18Speaker 01

  No.

• 59:18Speaker 00

  And their friends are all people in work.

• 59:21Speaker 01

  One hundred percent.

• 59:22Speaker 00

  And it's like, oh my god, I'm so grateful I have best friends from college and I've-

• 59:25Speaker 01

  Wait, I was gonna say, so do your friends not all work in the industry? Cause you grew up in LA, right?

• 59:28Speaker 00

  They do now, but um- It's a very, my best friend who you just met, Alice.

• 59:35Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 59:36Speaker 00

  Still works like, normal job, works retail, like, she really is a very grounding voice for me.

• 59:43Speaker 01

  When someone that you know wants the best for you, it's like, I love that person that you have in your life. You're like, oh, actually, that's probably good. I should definitely, yeah, okay, good.

• 59:50Speaker 00

  And she like, she gives me like, the toughest, toughest, toughest love when I don't wanna hear it. I do not wanna hear it. She'll come, like, I'll be on cloud nine, she'll come grabbing me down, like, don't get, like, don't get it twisted.

• 1:00:03Speaker 01

  Yes, yes, yes.

• 1:00:04Speaker 00

  Like, you're, this is a false sense of whatever. That week when that was all going down, she was the one person that made me feel better, more than anyone else.

• 1:00:12Speaker 01

  Amazing.

• 1:00:12Speaker 00

  And I thought she was gonna be the one that was like. I don't even remember. I just remember hanging up the phone and feeling better.

• 1:00:20Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 1:00:21Speaker 00

  I, it's all I remember. It's just hanging up the phone and being like, oh my god, like, I thought she was gonna be like, you shouldn't have done that, you shouldn't have done this, this was a mistake. She like, didn't do any of that. She, I hung up the phone and I felt like a weight was lifted. I was like, oh my god, at least I have Alice.

• 1:00:38Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:00:39Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:00:39Speaker 01

  One hundred percent. I, I know exactly how that feels, and I think that it's the friends that offer you tough love, though, that in the moments where you not, when, where you need, you just need support, can also give it to you.

• 1:00:51Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:00:51Speaker 01

  It's the people that are being like, your biggest cheerleaders when you're up, that are then like, when you're down, like, those are the moments where they're like, they don't quite know how to handle the awkward thing of it being like, oh, this is slightly messy.

• 1:01:03Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:01:04Speaker 01

  Whereas like, you know, it is this career, this life, it is messy.

• 1:01:07Speaker 00

  It's messy.

• 1:01:08Speaker 01

  So you need people to be able to be like, hits or whatever, it's up, it's down, it's like, you know, I rem, you, I have, uh, uh, my best friend is like, is, he, he's the same, he's like that for me, and I'm like, he has been going through a bit of a tough time recently, career-wise, he's an actor too, and he just had like, the biggest win, and, and I was, been with him for all of it, and I'm like, but what's great is that like, you know, things have been going pretty well for me, and it never, it's tough when you have friends that are in the same industry as you. It's hard to watch when you're not feeling great about your career at the moment, and you have a friend who's like, you know, on a press junket doing this, this, it's, it never gets in the way.

• 1:01:50Speaker 00

  And that's, but that's human to feel that way, though.

• 1:01:53Speaker 01

  Of course it is. By the way, jealousy is like the most human thing ever.

• 1:01:55Speaker 00

  And I, people feel like these days. Paint it very black and white and like villainize jealousy. And it's not really like this villainous.

• 1:02:04Speaker 01

  It's not.

• 1:02:05Speaker 00

  Feeling. It's this very natural. And it all comes from insecurity.

• 1:02:09Speaker 01

  Of course it does. Whenever I felt jealous, it's because I'm like, I don't know. That's lacking in me or in my life. It's not because I'm like. I'm amazing and you're, you don't deserve. Why would anyone not deserve whatever? You know what I mean? I completely agree with you.

• 1:02:26Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:02:30Speaker 00

  Wow. I feel like my third eye was just opened.

• 1:02:34Speaker 01

  Do you do therapy?

• 1:02:36Speaker 00

  I do.

• 1:02:36Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 1:02:37Speaker 00

  I have a new, I actually just got a new therapist for my OCD. She's been good.

• 1:02:41Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 1:02:42Speaker 00

  But I don't like, there's, god, therapy is just like, some days you're like in it and then some days you're like counting down the seconds for it to be over.

• 1:02:48Speaker 01

  Yep, yep, yep. So funny though, I always find that like I don't find the time for it when I need it. And when I do need, when I don't need it, I'm like, I could do some therapy, like I have time in my life. So stupid. I just have been diagnosed with OCD.

• 1:03:03Speaker 00

  Oh, really?

• 1:03:04Speaker 01

  Well, because I never thought I had it because I don't give it, I don't care about things being clean.

• 1:03:07Speaker 00

  Neither do I.

• 1:03:08Speaker 01

  I thought it was about cleanliness.

• 1:03:09Speaker 00

  It's not.

• 1:03:10Speaker 01

  Like, by the way, obviously I'm like, I'm not like dirty, whatever. But like my room's a mess and like I'll come home from, I'll come home from work. Like now, there's no way I'm getting home and unpacking my suitcase the day I land.

• 1:03:24Speaker 00

  No.

• 1:03:25Speaker 01

  That's not how my, so I was always like, I don't have OCD. I know people that like. Everything's in their perfect place. That's not who I am. But obviously like obsessive compulsive, yeah, in other ways.

• 1:03:38Speaker 00

  Can I ask what made you, what, like, how did you get diagnosed?

• 1:03:42Speaker 01

  I, I was like, I can't turn my brain off. I just can't turn my brain off. And so I went being like. It's just, I, I can't, and I, and I'm thinking the same things all the time. And also I'm like, always making lists. And I'm always being like, these are the tasks that I have and what, and the end of the thing, you know, um. I have a lot of stress and I kept telling myself, oh, I have so much stress in my life. And I was creating this like, kind of whirlwind of like, um, these, I just, I just, I become obsessed with things. And I can't become obsessed, like intrusive thoughts, I guess. That was.

• 1:04:24Speaker 00

  And then you get scared of manifesting those thoughts that you're like, it's like, it's the most insane pattern.

• 1:04:29Speaker 01

  Well, this is the thing, cause I'm also like, I really believe that words have power.

• 1:04:34Speaker 00

  Me too.

• 1:04:34Speaker 01

  Super believe in manifestation and like, super believe in like, I think I've willed everything, both good and bad into my life.

• 1:04:43Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:04:44Speaker 01

  And that makes me scared.

• 1:04:46Speaker 00

  But that's why OCD is so scary.

• 1:04:48Speaker 01

  It's so scary, cause you're like, uh-oh.

• 1:04:50Speaker 00

  And you can't talk about it, but you can't stop thinking about it.

• 1:04:52Speaker 01

  Stop thinking it and you're like, uh-oh, I'm thinking this thing and therefore it's gonna happen.

• 1:04:56Speaker 00

  Yeah, yes.

• 1:04:58Speaker 01

  It's like having a big red button, like, and someone's like, don't press it. And then your brain is like, press it, press it, press it, press it.

• 1:05:04Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:05:05Speaker 01

  And then, I mean, this is kind of dark, but I, I had cancer in twenty twenty. And I convinced myself that I'd thought it into existence. And that was like, I mean, obviously that's crazy. I was, I was twenty, I was COVID.

• 1:05:23Speaker 00

  But in the moment.

• 1:05:23Speaker 01

  In the moment, I was like, I remember when I got the diagnosis, I was like, I knew it. I literally like that, crazy. You know what I mean? Instead of being like, uh, I was like, I knew it. And it's like, because where as soon as, as soon, as soon as I felt ill, I was like, I'm sick. I'm really sick.

• 1:05:43Speaker 00

  Oh, and then you felt like it was on you.

• 1:05:45Speaker 01

  Yeah, then I felt it was on me, cause I was like, in another world, if I'd have been like, I'm probably fine.

• 1:05:50Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:05:51Speaker 01

  It wouldn't have been that. I mean, I know logically, I know that's insane, but also, who knows? You know what I mean? I, I, obviously, but you know, it's just, and what's hard, I think about this industry and this life is you can be, it's such a positive thing. Feeling like you're operating on a really high vibrational frequency where people are like gravitating towards you and good things come to you and you are a person where things happen to. That's good. You don't want to be the person that like things aren't happening to. But then I you can get in your head where you're like, that's also works in a negative scale.

• 1:06:26Speaker 00

  And it's it's it's such a tough industry to have OCD and it sounds like it's like magical thinking OCD is what they call it.

• 1:06:34Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:06:35Speaker 00

  Where it's like, I have created this and that's how I I used that's how I like it's and that's yeah, it's it's horrible.

• 1:06:42Speaker 01

  It's horrible.

• 1:06:43Speaker 00

  I'm so sorry that you but it's it's good that people are talking about it now.

• 1:06:47Speaker 01

  It's good that people are talking about it now and it's an OCD isn't just like a thing. Like I I think it's great that there will be a generation of people that grow up knowing that it's not just like, oh, I I didn't lock the front door. I mean, that was an issue too. But you know, it's not just that. It's like, whatever, because I had no idea.

• 1:07:04Speaker 00

  Well, people used to not believe me in high school. I would be like, I have OCD and they'd be like, but you're because I'm such a messy like.

• 1:07:09Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:07:09Speaker 00

  I'm a mess, messy, messy, messy, messy, messy person. And people would be like, you don't have that. OCD is when things are neat and this and I'm like, I don't think that that's what it is.

• 1:07:20Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:07:21Speaker 00

  Like, it's like this obsessive need to it's like control. It's all it's such a control thing and like the it's like the idea that like you're in the passenger seat and your OCD is like in the front seat driving. And you're like telling them where to go, but it's also like telling you you're it's like the wildest. I don't even know how to describe it.

• 1:07:42Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, that it that's the how to describe it.

• 1:07:46Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:07:46Speaker 01

  It is exactly like that. And other people can't see the difference between like the it and you and you're like.

• 1:07:52Speaker 00

  Yeah. And it's like, it's like, okay, can you and the OCD is like, can you grab this out of the the glove department? Because I'll need that in order for this to make this turn and have this good thing to happen. That's like how it like. But it's you, it's so hard to make it not real when your fear comes true.

• 1:08:10Speaker 01

  That's exactly what it is. And, and when you're the good things come true.

• 1:08:14Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:08:14Speaker 01

  You're like, oh, well, that into existence.

• 1:08:16Speaker 00

  I knew it, I knew it.

• 1:08:16Speaker 01

  I told you.

• 1:08:17Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:08:18Speaker 01

  And then everything bad that happens, you're like, I knew it.

• 1:08:20Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:08:20Speaker 01

  Oh, my God, it's insane.

• 1:08:23Speaker 00

  That's why I like, I, if you like, if like you ever hear me be like, if someone will be, I'll be like, oh, my God, I'm so happy right now.

• 1:08:32Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:08:33Speaker 00

  I'll never say like, I'm so happy, period.

• 1:08:35Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:08:35Speaker 00

  Because I'm scared that if I say I'm so happy, period, then it'll like cause my OCD to like steer off and something bad will happen.

• 1:08:43Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:08:44Speaker 00

  Like, I'm so scared of concrete things.

• 1:08:47Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:08:47Speaker 00

  Cause I'm so scared of like willing other things into existence.

• 1:08:50Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:08:51Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:08:54Speaker 01

  That's it, that's it.

• 1:08:56Speaker 00

  Oh, this is the deepest we've gotten in a while.

• 1:08:58Speaker 01

  Oh, really?

• 1:08:58Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:08:59Speaker 01

  I mean, I.

• 1:09:00Speaker 00

  This feels like therapy for me.

• 1:09:01Speaker 01

  Yeah, I know, same, but that's good, right?

• 1:09:04Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:09:04Speaker 01

  I love, I think it's so important, but then again, I'm also into anything that like, anything that's, that it's like a good thing that isn't therapy as well. Like, I love, like, I, I've gotten more into recently, like something like acupuncture, for example.

• 1:09:20Speaker 00

  Oh, I'm obsessed with acupuncture.

• 1:09:21Speaker 01

  Are you?

• 1:09:22Speaker 00

  Yeah, obsessed.

• 1:09:23Speaker 01

  Are you?

• 1:09:23Speaker 00

  I dream about it.

• 1:09:24Speaker 01

  I do too.

• 1:09:25Speaker 00

  I like love the little needle.

• 1:09:27Speaker 01

  How many two, how many times is too many times for acupuncture?

• 1:09:29Speaker 00

  I think you could do it every day.

• 1:09:31Speaker 01

  Love it, I love it, because I also think that that's, that, I think that it's kind of in the same vein, you're like, okay, take the wheel.

• 1:09:39Speaker 00

  Yeah, yes.

• 1:09:40Speaker 01

  Like, it's not, it's just do like, and then I can immediately feel like, oh, I'm free.

• 1:09:46Speaker 00

  That's why I like fall for, not fall for, but like go for so many health trends or whatever, cause I'm like.

• 1:09:52Speaker 01

  Same, cause I'm like, okay, great.

• 1:09:53Speaker 00

  I'm fixing it.

• 1:09:54Speaker 01

  Yeah, same.

• 1:09:55Speaker 00

  I'm fixing it, something correct is happening.

• 1:09:57Speaker 01

  There's actually a shaman in L A that someone gave me the number of before I came out here and they were like, they will just like, do everything. And I was like, I'm, I just can't wait. And I, you, you go, and he's so funny, he's like, clearly whatever, I text him and I was like, hey, I'm coming to L A, are you free? And he was like texting me, you get here and if I'm around, like, I'll see you, I was like.

• 1:10:21Speaker 00

  No, it's the most L A. L A health.

• 1:10:24Speaker 01

  Appointments?

• 1:10:25Speaker 00

  No, it's not real.

• 1:10:29Speaker 00

  I'm having so much fun with you and all I can think about is like going out.

• 1:10:32Speaker 01

  I know. Okay, so living room as well.

• 1:10:34Speaker 00

  Living room is and it's fun. You sit, you sit outside, you smoke a cigarette, you have a drink and you and you're just, it's like Chiltern a little bit.

• 1:10:41Speaker 01

  Okay, well, R I P.

• 1:10:42Speaker 00

  Is it still burnt down?

• 1:10:43Speaker 01

  Yeah. It's coming back.

• 1:10:46Speaker 00

  But the thing is, I feel like when people thought Chiltern died, like everything in London died and I was like, well, they must not be doing London right.

• 1:10:53Speaker 01

  Oh, no, a hundred percent. Yeah, you have to like, you have to know where to go. And you have to like know, also, London is about like restaurants, bars, clubs. Like, it's not in the same way as here where it's like you go for dinner and then if you're gonna go out, like there is that one place that everyone goes to and everyone's gonna be.

• 1:11:10Speaker 00

  Right.

• 1:11:10Speaker 01

  It's not, and also the most fun people in London aren't at Chiltern.

• 1:11:14Speaker 00

  Right.

• 1:11:14Speaker 01

  You know what I mean? They're like, eh, they're, eh, when, Chiltern's a great night when it's, when industry, eh, like when it's like an industry week is in terms of like the BAFTA week or like the Grammys or whatever.

• 1:11:27Speaker 00

  During the BAFTA week.

• 1:11:29Speaker 01

  It's amazing.

• 1:11:30Speaker 00

  Oh.

• 1:11:30Speaker 01

  It's the best because like that's then when it's like, oh, cause then it's like, we're in L A. You know what I mean? Like, everyone's here and this is where everyone's going and like, it's an industry, London becomes an industry town for the first time ever. Whereas ninety percent of the time, if you're in a pub, like, no one is, no one works in my, our industry, no one. You know what I mean? Everyone does like, huh, so, eh, okay, they might like watch your show and enjoy it, but at the end of the day, they don't think that you, what you're doing is any more important than what they're doing or that their wife is doing. It's not, they're like, okay, whatever.

• 1:12:07Speaker 00

  But that's like the beauty, I think, of London and like Europe culture.

• 1:12:11Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:12:12Speaker 00

  It's weird. In America, I feel like we like put celebrities on pedestals.

• 1:12:17Speaker 01

  Hmm.

• 1:12:18Speaker 00

  Like, like, that is the basis of celebrity culture here.

• 1:12:22Speaker 01

  Yeah. The only thing that I think is different, and I think this is global, is musicians. Ah, like, like, whenever, and in London is this, like, if some, if, if, I mean, have you said it though? I know Olivia Rodrigo, like she's, cause she lives in London and she's like comes to a few, but, and like people are pretty chill about her, but in a way that I'm like, you're, to me, I'm like, you're.

• 1:12:45Speaker 00

  Olivia Rodrigo.

• 1:12:46Speaker 01

  Yeah, right. But even me, I'm like, whenever I see pop stars, I'm like.

• 1:12:52Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:12:53Speaker 01

  I love it.

• 1:12:53Speaker 00

  It's a rush. It's like, oh my god, I feel like I'm witnessing magic.

• 1:12:57Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:12:57Speaker 00

  Are you a, who do you listen to? What type of music do you listen to?

• 1:13:00Speaker 01

  Oh my god, I listen, I really listen to everything. I grew up listening to like rock and roll. My mum like loves rock and roll. So I grew up listening to like old school rock and roll. But now I love pop, honestly, like I love pop music. Like I love listening to hits. Like I'm, if I'm like a bit bored of my own thing that's going on, I will listen to the charts and I'll be like, and I just enjoy.

• 1:13:22Speaker 00

  Right.

• 1:13:22Speaker 01

  That. But like at the moment, like I've been listening to Harry Styles' new album. I love, that's been fun. I love um Olivia Dean. Love her.

• 1:13:33Speaker 00

  She's having a real moment.

• 1:13:34Speaker 01

  She's having a real moment. Love Ray, uh love Ariana Grande.

• 1:13:39Speaker 00

  Love Ari.

• 1:13:40Speaker 01

  Oh my god.

• 1:13:41Speaker 00

  Love Ari is like, that's our girl.

• 1:13:44Speaker 01

  Yeah, amazing. Um yeah, but I really do just listen to everything. Yeah.

• 1:13:52Speaker 00

  I'm kind of the same way. I feel like I, as long as I can find a good melody and like good storytelling.

• 1:13:58Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:13:59Speaker 00

  That's what I'll go for.

• 1:14:00Speaker 01

  Oh, storytelling is your thing?

• 1:14:01Speaker 00

  Yeah, I love a good story in a song.

• 1:14:03Speaker 01

  Okay, so you love like Taylor Swift?

• 1:14:05Speaker 00

  Taylor Swift is like, I just love the way she tells a story. I just think it's like so fascinating. And I love um like a story that you can't really tell what the truth is and what's not like. And when we can't be friends, like you don't know if that's about her ex-husband.

• 1:14:22Speaker 01

  One hundred percent.

• 1:14:22Speaker 00

  Or the public.

• 1:14:23Speaker 01

  One hundred percent.

• 1:14:24Speaker 00

  And when you, and when you can view the story multiple ways, it feels like I'm in English class.

• 1:14:27Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 1:14:28Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:14:28Speaker 01

  Uh but I love like a, I really love like a ballad for that reason, because I feel like emotionally someone's like, like one of my favorite Lady Gaga songs of all time is um, oh my god.

• 1:14:41Speaker 00

  Are you about to say Peaceless?

• 1:14:42Speaker 01

  No, I, I wasn't.

• 1:14:46Speaker 01

  One of my favorite Lady Gaga songs.

• 1:14:47Speaker 00

  Marry the night.

• 1:14:48Speaker 01

  Why am I blanking? Ben Platt and you and I.

• 1:14:52Speaker 00

  Yeah, phenomenal.

• 1:14:53Speaker 01

  Because I'm like, because I'm like, I'm in that bar with you.

• 1:14:58Speaker 00

  Yes, you can smell it.

• 1:15:00Speaker 01

  Smell it, you can sense it. Something that I'm like, it, the, the story in it, it's almost like a monologue in the sense that you're like, you can feel what the character wants from the song. Which is like, to. I mean, I don't know, in that, like, to like, sing to someone being like, get over here right fucking now.

• 1:15:19Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:15:19Speaker 01

  I mean, I love that. Have you heard Ben Platt's cover of that song?

• 1:15:21Speaker 00

  No, I never have heard it.

• 1:15:22Speaker 01

  Amazing.

• 1:15:23Speaker 00

  Oh, I've heard his cover of Diet Pepsi, which is also.

• 1:15:26Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:15:26Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:15:27Speaker 01

  You and I, Ben Platt, and he like does this crazy riff at the end and I'm like.

• 1:15:31Speaker 00

  Oh my god, is it online?

• 1:15:33Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:15:33Speaker 00

  Okay, I'm gonna listen to it.

• 1:15:34Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:15:35Speaker 00

  Well, speaking of music, the soundtrack to industry is fucking phenomenal.

• 1:15:39Speaker 01

  It's so good.

• 1:15:40Speaker 00

  It is really so good.

• 1:15:41Speaker 01

  I think that the, the needle drop thing of like, at the end of an episode and like, boom, and they do some crazy, Beef is doing it at the moment as well, like Beef.

• 1:15:50Speaker 00

  Phineas is the composer for Beef, so that's why it's.

• 1:15:54Speaker 01

  Of them?

• 1:15:55Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:15:56Speaker 01

  I didn't know that.

• 1:15:57Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:15:58Speaker 01

  That's so cool.

• 1:15:58Speaker 00

  He's like, he has a real career in like, um, composing television shows.

• 1:16:02Speaker 01

  Really?

• 1:16:03Speaker 00

  He's done a bunch, yeah, he's really, really good at it.

• 1:16:05Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:16:05Speaker 00

  Cause he can view music very cinematically.

• 1:16:08Speaker 01

  Story, yeah.

• 1:16:09Speaker 00

  Like as a story and it's, he's very good at it, but um.

• 1:16:12Speaker 01

  Music is so important.

• 1:16:17Speaker 00

  Okay, are you ready to tell me what's wrong?

• 1:16:19Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 1:16:20Speaker 00

  These are, the pussies submit what's wrong with their life and we tell them how to fix it.

• 1:16:24Speaker 01

  Okay, great.

• 1:16:25Speaker 00

  Or try to. How do you get over the fear of going on a bad date? Like genuinely, I went on a coffee date for the first time in sixteen months and it was genuinely horrible. I, I can't sober date. I can't, I'm sorry, I can't, I, I, I have to have a drink in me.

• 1:16:41Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:16:41Speaker 00

  Or else I'll be too like, so, I got it. We kept talking over each other, his breath smelled ew. We had literally nothing in common. At least he picked me up and paid for me, but I'm not taking this easy, it might be another sixteen months for me. I hate dating.

• 1:16:55Speaker 01

  Also, a bad date is, is hard to come back from.

• 1:16:58Speaker 00

  I went on one once and it was a dinner date and I remember the guy was like so nervous and I just remember being like, fuck this.

• 1:17:05Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:17:06Speaker 00

  And I, you just have to be like, I'm out.

• 1:17:08Speaker 01

  It's, the whole thing is also just so like, pick me. Like, why are we both putting ourselves in a situation where we're like, just kind of, I don't know, it's, I mean, it is so hard and humbling and like such an intense experience. I would say.

• 1:17:27Speaker 01

  I would say like a good way of getting over like dating jitters is to like go out with single friends, not friends in a relationship, with single friends who like also want to meet people so that you you can maybe meet people a bit I R L before the date.

• 1:17:49Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:17:50Speaker 01

  Because like if we're talking about like meeting on a dating app and then meeting up, of course, that's like the most intense version of the thing. Yeah.

• 1:17:56Speaker 00

  It's awkward. It's not like natural to the human experience.

• 1:18:00Speaker 01

  No.

• 1:18:01Speaker 00

  It's so awkward. It's just dating sucks. Like dating is never easy.

• 1:18:06Speaker 01

  Do you speak on the phone to people you haven't met in person?

• 1:18:09Speaker 00

  No, but I I I've done it before and it actually is somewhat helpful.

• 1:18:14Speaker 01

  To speak on the phone.

• 1:18:15Speaker 00

  Hear their voice.

• 1:18:16Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:18:16Speaker 00

  To like, it is somewhat helpful. It's like the equivalent of like meeting at a bar and like taking their number and being like, let's go on a date.

• 1:18:24Speaker 01

  One hundred percent.

• 1:18:24Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:18:25Speaker 01

  I think that that's good, though. Like, speaking on the, if you're just meeting someone cold for the first time, maybe just like a little cool, like a FaceTime or something.

• 1:18:35Speaker 00

  It feels like networking. Dating feels like dating and networking and all of it has become so. That's why like going out and like Manny, who's sitting out there once was like, I read that like if you read a book in a public setting, people will come up to you.

• 1:18:50Speaker 01

  By the way, it's true.

• 1:18:52Speaker 00

  It works. It works. It worked for her.

• 1:18:53Speaker 01

  Because people are like, oh, this person is like from an like an older time. So they they're not like necessarily need me to like D M them. Like they, this person wouldn't mind like an ancient way of speaking, which is me coming up to you. I once was reading a book at a coffee shop and someone came up to me and was like, are you enjoying, a man came up to me and was like, are you enjoying that book? And I was like, yeah. And he was like, I wrote that book.

• 1:19:18Speaker 00

  Shut up.

• 1:19:18Speaker 01

  I was like, what? And he gave me his number and whatever. He left. I Googled the author. Not him.

• 1:19:25Speaker 00

  Wow.

• 1:19:26Speaker 01

  Not him. And I was like, in my mind, I was like, do I respect it? Or is it kind of like psycho?

• 1:19:31Speaker 00

  It's a mix of both.

• 1:19:31Speaker 01

  And I decided it was like a bit too psycho for me.

• 1:19:33Speaker 00

  That is crazy.

• 1:19:34Speaker 01

  I think it was like a bit narcissist too. And also not crazy to be like, at some point being like, I'm joking.

• 1:19:39Speaker 00

  It was just an excuse to get your number.

• 1:19:41Speaker 01

  Number and then like left. And then what would, when was he gonna tell me that?

• 1:19:45Speaker 00

  It was, it wasn't him. Weird. How did you meet your husband?

• 1:19:49Speaker 01

  We went to drama school together. We were in the same year at school.

• 1:19:53Speaker 00

  And how did you have, what was your first date?

• 1:19:56Speaker 01

  Well, this is the thing, like, obviously, we were friends for a while. So he hit on me day one, though. He hit on me day one. I had a boyfriend at the time. And when he heard that, he was like, oh, boring. And I was like, ah, okay.

• 1:20:11Speaker 00

  Your wedding is her Roman Empire.

• 1:20:13Speaker 02

  Really?

• 1:20:14Speaker 01

  Yeah. Why so? I love that.

• 1:20:15Speaker 02

  The hair.

• 1:20:16Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:20:18Speaker 02

  You know, you know, it was amazing.

• 1:20:20Speaker 01

  It did look good. It was the best day of my life.

• 1:20:23Speaker 02

  And like all the photos and I saw on the interview how you said the thing about the champagne in the beginning. It just looked so chic and fabulous.

• 1:20:31Speaker 01

  Thank you. It was so fun. Planning it was so fun. Didn't go crazy. It really, we both enjoyed the process. Didn't make it about anyone else. It was just about like us. Oh, I can't recommend getting married enough. It's so fucking fun.

• 1:20:49Speaker 02

  It also felt so like, obviously, I don't know you, but it felt so you guys. And like, like you enjoyed it.

• 1:20:56Speaker 01

  Yeah, it wasn't like, and then what did people do? It was like, what do I want to do? Also, I'm obsessed with, I love a party. Like, I love.

• 1:21:05Speaker 00

  I love a party.

• 1:21:06Speaker 01

  I love a party. So I was like, oh, if I'm gonna throw a party, it's gonna be fun. That's all I care. Like, I want the party to be fun. Like, at the end, like, I was like, the very end, before we all went down to like dance, I was like, I was like, and then I want everyone to have a tequila shot. So everyone had like a little bottle of nineteen forty two to shot, like at the end of like all the speeches. I was like, I just want people to get wasted. When everyone was like, is it, um, is like, is it just wine at dinner? I was like, fuck no. Like, if you wanted to keep like drink, but, uh, you know, you've got to be specific about like where, where you're spending the money. What, uh, really?

• 1:21:45Speaker 01

  We were smart. Like, it wasn't crazy. And people spend such an inordinate amount on weddings now. Of course, you know, whatever. I was like, the things that didn't matter to me, I was like, fuck, whatever. I just want everyone to have the best time ever. And I really think they did.

• 1:22:01Speaker 00

  Money doesn't buy a good time. It can.

• 1:22:03Speaker 01

  It, of course it can. If people know like what, how to have a good time, then there's like no ceiling on how much money. But like.

• 1:22:10Speaker 00

  You can have a good time anywhere.

• 1:22:11Speaker 01

  Fireworks, do you need like a display, like whatever, like no one remembers that shit.

• 1:22:16Speaker 00

  No.

• 1:22:16Speaker 01

  They remember if they were dancing till five AM, six AM, whatever, like. My holler was a bridesmaid, Miki and Conrad were there, Ha- Harry was there, Kit was there, everyone came. Connor, it was so fun. And we had Sprinter vans. This was like something that I was, one of the things I was held bent on was like.

• 1:22:34Speaker 01

  We were going from one place to another. And one of my least favorite things at weddings is like when you've got to travel and there's like a traffic jam or something or like. You're, it's slow.

• 1:22:42Speaker 00

  Oh, and it kills the vibe completely.

• 1:22:44Speaker 01

  Yeah, everyone's on like a huge coach. So like you've got a, it's just a bit hot and like what, no, I was like, I want Sprinter vans. I want people to like, I want it to feel like the president is coming through. And I want like, I wanna, I made playlists for the way there and the way back that I timed. On the way out. So I like on my phone was like, what do I want people to listen to? Like as they're coming up the driveway and seeing the house for the first time. What do I want? So what do I want people to listen to when they're going to the party? Like I want them to.

• 1:23:14Speaker 00

  You're a good party planner.

• 1:23:16Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah. I was like, I, in another life, like I would, that's what I would do. Be like planning weddings.

• 1:23:21Speaker 00

  Because I've never heard something described that way. That's pretty brilliant.

• 1:23:25Speaker 01

  Fun. I loved it. By the way, I am what I am was my wedding song.

• 1:23:29Speaker 00

  Was it really?

• 1:23:30Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:23:30Speaker 00

  Like your first dance?

• 1:23:31Speaker 01

  My, our first dance. And it was choreographed.

• 1:23:33Speaker 00

  Oh.

• 1:23:34Speaker 01

  I mean, we choreographed it ourselves because Jamie's does musical theatre. And I was like, Jamie sang I Am What I Am at a pride cabaret at Rada. When we were at school together. And that was the moment I was like.

• 1:23:51Speaker 01

  I love this man.

• 1:23:52Speaker 00

  Oh.

• 1:23:52Speaker 01

  It was the fact that someone wanted to sing a song about like. Self-expression and freedom and joy and happiness. I was like, yeah, bitch. That's my man, even though it's like a gay anthem. I was like.

• 1:24:05Speaker 00

  That's so beautiful.

• 1:24:07Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:24:07Speaker 00

  Oh, well, congratulations.

• 1:24:09Speaker 01

  Thank you.

• 1:24:09Speaker 00

  On a beautiful wedding. That is Louise's Roman Empire.

• 1:24:13Speaker 01

  My favorite thing, by the way, when people come up to me in the street and they're like, it's not like. I love Yasmin, I love industry, I love work. If they're like, I see your wedding and you're, it's iconic. I'm like. What's your phone number?

• 1:24:24Speaker 00

  Yeah, the hair is her Roman empire.

• 1:24:27Speaker 01

  Thank you.

• 1:24:28Speaker 00

  I am a serial Instagram stalker of exes, friends, randos, etc. Sometimes I zoom out and realize how fucking weird this is. But I'm addicted lol. This is probably so bad for my mental health. What do I do? I think delete.

• 1:24:40Speaker 01

  Delete Instagram?

• 1:24:41Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:24:41Speaker 01

  Yeah. Yeah, delete Instagram for a bit. Come off. Scrolling is like doom scrolling is hellish.

• 1:24:49Speaker 00

  Watch a TV show. Find something that you, because like you, like those like obsessive thoughts of another person's life. You can place those thoughts elsewhere.

• 1:24:57Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:24:58Speaker 00

  You can place them into characters of a television show.

• 1:25:00Speaker 01

  Really good advice, actually.

• 1:25:01Speaker 00

  Oh, thank you.

• 1:25:02Speaker 01

  No, it is because it's like we, that's what that was created for in the first place.

• 1:25:07Speaker 00

  Right.

• 1:25:07Speaker 01

  Talk about film and television as like a release from the everyday as like fantasy. And you know, we can put entertainment and we've like turned that into like just scrolling on people's Instagrams. And it's so not as interesting or creative or as what the whole like hundreds of years of the movie industry has been sort of made for.

• 1:25:31Speaker 00

  Watch Housewives.

• 1:25:32Speaker 01

  Uh, by the way.

• 1:25:34Speaker 00

  I know.

• 1:25:34Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:25:35Speaker 00

  I know. Are you watching Rhode Island?

• 1:25:37Speaker 01

  I started it because you said.

• 1:25:38Speaker 00

  Really?

• 1:25:39Speaker 01

  Yeah, but.

• 1:25:41Speaker 00

  Do you like or no?

• 1:25:42Speaker 01

  I, oh, listen, I love it all. But the thing is, is that I have to, you obviously have to invest for a second. Takes you a second to be like.

• 1:25:50Speaker 00

  Season one is always hard.

• 1:25:51Speaker 01

  Season one is always hard.

• 1:25:52Speaker 00

  It's always hard. I'm slowly drifting away from my family with each passing year. It's hard because I lived abroad for three years now and communicating with them on a regular basis is so hard. We never expected this because I was only supposed to go for a year in college and now just live here. It's expensive to travel back and forth, so what do we do? Drifting from family is the worst.

• 1:26:11Speaker 01

  The worst. And it's hard. My, my, my husband lives, is from, is American. He live, he's from New York. And when you, when you have, someone's always gonna have to make the choice to be further away from their family. I don't know.

• 1:26:27Speaker 00

  I don't know either.

• 1:26:27Speaker 01

  Yeah. It's like, what? I mean, obviously, travel is expensive. That's the thing going back and forth. Like, it takes a commitment. But maybe find somewhere that to meet in the middle sometimes that feels like less like if it's a long trip feels less like.

• 1:26:42Speaker 00

  The thing about like drifting away from family especially is like, I feel like maybe this person feels like I've drifted so far that it's awkward. I don't want to face the awkwardness of the first 10 minutes of whatever interaction we have next.

• 1:26:55Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:26:55Speaker 00

  And it's really just like ripping off a Band-Aid. You have to just do it.

• 1:26:59Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:26:59Speaker 00

  And like acknowledge that it's been weird.

• 1:27:01Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:27:02Speaker 00

  Acknowledging it is like, God, and like, give yourself grace. I feel like, like, that's the thing I've learned about family and everything is like, my mom was like, once like, you're only human. Like, you know what I mean? Like, you need to give yourself grace for like, not, like, there's no rule, family has no rules and blood has no rules and like, you need to give yourself grace for like, maybe being distant and not like, you just, like, more grace is required.

• 1:27:32Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:27:32Speaker 00

  It's not as like linear line.

• 1:27:34Speaker 01

  People don't necessarily, like, also, your, if your family are like hurting that you're a bit further away, that's coming from a place of love, too.

• 1:27:42Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:27:42Speaker 01

  So it's like, it's just getting back to that place where it's not so awkward, but it's tough.

• 1:27:49Speaker 00

  It's really tough.

• 1:27:50Speaker 01

  It's tough.

• 1:27:51Speaker 00

  Family's hard. Well, Marisa, what did we learn today?

• 1:27:57Speaker 01

  I learned that I feel like we are super similar.

• 1:28:04Speaker 00

  Yeah, and that we need a night out.

• 1:28:06Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:28:07Speaker 00

  ASAP.

• 1:28:07Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:28:08Speaker 00

  And that if you are not watching Industry, sit down and watch Industry.

• 1:28:13Speaker 01

  Watch the show, guys. It's, it's good.

• 1:28:15Speaker 00

  At the end of the day.

• 1:28:16Speaker 01

  At the end of the day.

• 1:28:17Speaker 00

  It's like objectively good.

• 1:28:18Speaker 01

  It's.

• 1:28:19Speaker 00

  You can't say it's bad. It's a good show.

• 1:28:21Speaker 01

  And it gets better, too. It's not.

• 1:28:23Speaker 00

  It's wine.

• 1:28:23Speaker 01

  It, it's, it's a fine wine.

• 1:28:25Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:28:26Speaker 01

  As are we on the show. Like, we're getting, we're just getting better with age, babe.

• 1:28:31Speaker 00

  Well, Marisa, thank you for coming on Therapise.

• 1:28:34Speaker 01

  Thank you so much for having me.

• 1:28:35Speaker 00

  I love you. This was so fun.

• 1:28:36Speaker 01

  It was really fun. Bye, pussies.