Session 101: Julia & Payton

Do you wanna know something about you? You hate fun. Thank you to Bumble for sponsoring this episode! Ready to meet someone great? Take this as your sign—download Bumble! https://bumble.onelink.me/3396940749/samrji33 Tell Me What's Wrong at ⁠ passthatpuss.com Follow Julia & Payton! @juliamervis @paytonpurther Follow Me! Instagram | @passthatpuss TikTok | @octopusslover8 Listen to "THERAPUSS" Spotify: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://open.spotify.com/show/1BHDdC0OVuHqZ706FobfOF ⁠⁠Apple Podcasts: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/therapuss-with-jake-shane/id1723626781⁠⁠ Amazon Podcasts: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://music.amazon.com/podcasts/93117357-1f23-46e1-8f26-88f5182a68b8/therapuss-with-jake-shane⁠⁠ YouTube: ⁠https://www.youtube.com/@octopusslover8 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

• 0:00Speaker 00

  Coca-Cola. For the big, for the small, the short and the tall. Peacemakers, risk takers. For the optimists, pessimists. For long distance love. For introverts and extroverts. The thinkers and the doers. For old friends and new. Coca-Cola. For everyone. Pick up some Coca-Cola at a store near you.

• 0:40Speaker 01

  Surprise pussies, welcome back to Therapuss. I have been waiting to do an episode with Julia and Peyton in New York. They have been having such a fun time and I missed Peyton and Julia so much. It was very depressing. When they left, I cried for the first time in years. Well, I guess I'll take this time to tell you what I'm listening to and watching. So I just started Task, which everyone's watching apparently. So we'll see how that turns out for me. In terms of what I'm listening to, I'm listening to a lot of Bon Iver because I'm trying to be like intellectual.

• 1:21Speaker 01

  And I feel like when I say I listen to Bon Iver, everyone's like, oh. So I've been listening to a lot of him. I've been listening to his second album, Bon Iver Bon Iver, which is amazing. You should give it a listen, especially because it's fall. My birthday is soon. The day this comes out will be October 19th and my birthday is October 27th. I have not planned anything. I think Peyton and Julie are coming to visit. I would appreciate a few posts here and there. A few texts, like that's really and truly like, you want to know what'll make my birthday good? Like waking up to a bunch of like, happy birthdays on my phone.

• 2:00Speaker 01

  And then I'm sure the following day I'll be super depressed because it's like the come down from that, but like that is what I want. Um, in better news, this surprise episode of Therapuss is amazing and I'm really excited for you guys to hear it. Um, to submit a tell me what's wrong, go to pass that puss dot com, click tell me what's wrong, leave a name and number if you're feeling fancy and enjoy the episode. Love you pussies.

• 2:23Speaker 01

  So before we begin this episode-

• 2:25Speaker 02

  Are we starting?

• 2:26Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 2:27Speaker 02

  Hi.

• 2:27Speaker 03

  Where are we supposed to look?

• 2:29Speaker 01

  I honestly have no idea.

• 2:31Speaker 03

  There, there. It's not like we're looking at each other much, huh?

• 2:34Speaker 01

  No, we're just-

• 2:35Speaker 02

  Things I don't want to use this angle.

• 2:40Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 2:41Speaker 02

  I ate this out of my face!

• 2:42Speaker 01

  So do you want to swap places? I'd much rather be on the edge.

• 2:46Speaker 02

  So I'm squished in between you two?

• 2:50Speaker 03

  I'm giving you plenty of space.

• 2:52Speaker 01

  Should we, we wanted to start this episode with a prayer to Shonda Rhimes. Ready? One, two, three. Thank you Shonda for everything you do for us. Stop, stop.

• 3:04Speaker 02

  Come on, we started so strong.

• 3:06Speaker 01

  Stop.

• 3:06Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 3:07Speaker 01

  Wait, one more time, one more time, one more time.

• 3:10Speaker 02

  We were doing so-

• 3:15Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 3:20Speaker 01

  Okay, ready?

• 3:21Speaker 03

  Hold on, hold on.

• 3:24Speaker 01

  Good morning.

• 3:25Speaker 03

  Okay, one, two, three.

• 3:27Speaker 01

  Thank you Shonda for everything you do for us. We'll never take for granted the constant entertainment- One more time, we can't laugh. We have to like be in charge.

• 3:35Speaker 03

  I have tears. I have tears. Okay, one, two, three.

• 3:40Speaker 01

  Thank you Shonda for everything you do for us. We'll never take for granted the constant entertainment and the joy your work brings us. Your art unites us all and we are eternally grateful. In scandal we pray, it's handled, amen.

• 3:54Speaker 02

  Damn.

• 3:58Speaker 02

  Damn that hit, I know it.

• 4:00Speaker 01

  We are, you guys aren't rewatching Scandal anymore, I am.

• 4:03Speaker 03

  The best part of that is it's handled, Damon. No, we have not, we're watching nine shows right now, we can't.

• 4:08Speaker 01

  What are you watching? Oh, Tissip?

• 4:11Speaker 02

  The summer I turn pretty, I hope Jenny Han, you see this. I want you to know that you are everything to me and more. I literally want to hug you, I want to be your friend at all times, and that's that.

• 4:22Speaker 01

  I don't.

• 4:22Speaker 02

  But, if Belly doesn't end up with Conrad, like, it will be tears on sight.

• 4:30Speaker 01

  Do you know how the book ends? Do you know how the book ends?

• 4:32Speaker 03

  Yeah, I do, I obviously read it.

• 4:33Speaker 02

  She marries Conrad.

• 4:34Speaker 01

  Right, they're like, it's hanging in our room.

• 4:37Speaker 02

  What? What's hanging?

• 4:39Speaker 01

  What?

• 4:39Speaker 02

  Who's hanging what?

• 4:40Speaker 01

  Did you, did you read the last sentence of the book?

• 4:43Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 4:44Speaker 03

  Is it the letter?

• 4:44Speaker 01

  Yeah, she's, no, it's like, she's like, the photo, it's like, hanging in our room.

• 4:48Speaker 02

  What photo?

• 4:50Speaker 01

  What?

• 4:51Speaker 03

  I don't know what the fuck you're talking about.

• 4:53Speaker 01

  Okay, so why was the last episode so bad? She lost.

• 4:55Speaker 03

  It was a filler episode and this bitch was running around Paris with an away suitcase.

• 4:59Speaker 02

  It was an ad.

• 4:59Speaker 03

  It was an ad.

• 5:00Speaker 02

  It was a sixty minute ad.

• 5:02Speaker 03

  Honest to God, you know what, I'm gonna, I'm gonna bite my tongue here.

• 5:05Speaker 01

  No, please say it.

• 5:07Speaker 02

  Unbite it.

• 5:07Speaker 03

  No.

• 5:08Speaker 02

  I low-key am super down for her Paris squad, like, I want to hang out with them.

• 5:11Speaker 01

  Does she have the Paris squad?

• 5:13Speaker 02

  Yeah, they were like, at a rave with her suitcase.

• 5:14Speaker 03

  And they were, and they were, and they were like.

• 5:18Speaker 02

  Like me.

• 5:19Speaker 03

  They, yeah, they were just like, girl, it was all about like, her finding herself.

• 5:24Speaker 01

  Was she like, yeah, I literally just ended my engagement? Why was she on FaceTime with him?

• 5:27Speaker 03

  And she put on this, she, by the way, so, there's no money for the wedding, right? Because the parents don't support it. She goes, she gets her, her dress, her wedding dress, and cancels her wedding. Puts her, like, you know, like, when people go like, backpacking in Europe and they have those backpacks?

• 5:44Speaker 02

  Like a hiking pack.

• 5:45Speaker 03

  Yeah, like, for some reason Belly has one at her wedding. And she puts the wedding dress in it. Throws it into her backpack, to go study for a semester abroad, without being signed up.

• 5:57Speaker 02

  She doesn't have a visa?

• 5:59Speaker 01

  When she lands in Paris, I saw on Twitter, she like, calls Jeremiah, and he's like, hey, girl, like, what's up?

• 6:04Speaker 03

  Yeah, and he's like, let's get back together, maybe?

• 6:07Speaker 02

  And she's like, I'm staying.

• 6:08Speaker 03

  And he goes, okay, fuck you, bye.

• 6:11Speaker 02

  That's like, pretty much exactly what happened.

• 6:12Speaker 01

  Well, my question is, like, I really would like to know, does Taylor give her songs to sing for free?

• 6:18Speaker 02

  Jenny Han wrote a letter. She wrote a letter.

• 6:22Speaker 01

  Saying what?

• 6:23Speaker 02

  Saying, you're everything to me. I listened to Fearless the whole time I wrote the books. I'm obsessed with you and Taylor said, yes.

• 6:29Speaker 03

  Jenny is like number one Swifty. Like Jenny's putting Easter eggs in the show. Like the show has its own Easter eggs. And they're, by the way, I just got full body chills. Genius.

• 6:37Speaker 01

  What are the full, what are the Easter eggs?

• 6:39Speaker 02

  Like there are hydrangeas in the front yard and they're blue for Jeremiah and then when she, when her feelings start coming back for Conrad, there's like a blue, there's a red hydrangea. Cause loving him was red.

• 6:51Speaker 01

  That's honestly kind of sick.

• 6:53Speaker 02

  Yeah. And then like the night before her wedding.

• 6:55Speaker 03

  Every scene where she's like having like doubts and like they put her in these positions, like she's just like for some reason wearing red.

• 7:01Speaker 02

  And the night before her wedding, when she's like having like issues thinking about Conrad, she puts on a red bikini and goes swimming.

• 7:09Speaker 01

  I remember that swimming scene. I actually did watch that. Where, where did Conrad go to college?

• 7:13Speaker 03

  He went to Brown and then transferred to Stanford.

• 7:15Speaker 01

  Where'd Jeremiah go?

• 7:16Speaker 03

  Finch.

• 7:19Speaker 02

  And want to know who else goes to Finch? Belly.

• 7:21Speaker 01

  Wait, wait. I'm confused. Why did she ever leave Conrad? Like what's the premise here?

• 7:26Speaker 03

  So he like, he like is honestly like.

• 7:29Speaker 02

  He's low key tears.

• 7:30Speaker 03

  He's total tears.

• 7:32Speaker 01

  Why?

• 7:32Speaker 03

  He just like, he, he, he gives his love and then he takes it away.

• 7:35Speaker 02

  He's really like emotionally unavailable.

• 7:37Speaker 03

  He's super, and he doesn't like show his or express his emotions. Like world's worst communicator pretty much all the time. Like he just won't tell her how much he loves her. Like she has, she's no idea like what he really feels for her and he just like is kind of nasty.

• 7:49Speaker 01

  I mean, even what?

• 7:50Speaker 02

  Like he, for example, he bought her for her birthday, like an infinity necklace. Cause it's supposed to be like their sign.

• 7:55Speaker 03

  And he like wouldn't give it to her.

• 7:56Speaker 02

  And on her birthday, the family is sitting together and they were like, everyone give Belly your presents. And he goes, I forgot it was her birthday. And it's like, he has the fucking infinity necklace in his dresser drawer, all wrapped up with a bow on it. Fucking give her the necklace. You bought it for her, give it to her.

• 8:10Speaker 01

  Why? When was that? Season two?

• 8:12Speaker 03

  He just has issues. Season one. Yeah.

• 8:13Speaker 01

  Maybe I should get into this. I just don't understand. Like, I don't, like when she, when she took an edible and danced to We Can't Be Friends and played them on.

• 8:24Speaker 02

  That's your dream.

• 8:26Speaker 03

  That bitch was making a bonrad at it in her head while she was tripping on shrooms.

• 8:31Speaker 01

  It was weed.

• 8:31Speaker 03

  So we can't be friends. Yeah, it was weed.

• 8:34Speaker 01

  What was your favorite? Okay.

• 8:36Speaker 03

  That was the best episode of the whole season.

• 8:37Speaker 01

  Yeah, well, that was a good one. I saw a few clips of that.

• 8:39Speaker 03

  No, it was the next one. The one where they called the wedding off was the best episode.

• 8:44Speaker 01

  And the mom's like so pumped.

• 8:45Speaker 03

  It was just a shit show, honestly.

• 8:47Speaker 02

  And then Jeremiah starts bullying the mom and goes, Laurel, I know you're happy. You never wanted this to happen. And Laurel was like, damn.

• 8:54Speaker 01

  And then, so.

• 8:56Speaker 03

  I mean, I think we can. Susanna dies in season like pretty much two.

• 9:00Speaker 02

  Like the first episode.

• 9:01Speaker 01

  And how does she pass?

• 9:02Speaker 03

  She's like already dead. She's cancer.

• 9:04Speaker 01

  And did she find out she has cancer in season one?

• 9:06Speaker 03

  Yeah, she had it. Was in remission and then it came back and she was like, I don't want to do treatment. Like I'm just, it's my time.

• 9:11Speaker 02

  And she lied to everyone because she wanted everyone to have one final summer of peace.

• 9:14Speaker 01

  Oh, wait, what? This show sounds amazing.

• 9:16Speaker 03

  Yeah, it just got full buddy chills, if you're wondering.

• 9:19Speaker 01

  And that's why they always say it's what Susanna would have wanted?

• 9:22Speaker 02

  It's what Susanna would have wanted. That's been our, that's been our bit for at least two weeks. It's what Susanna would have wanted. Cause like, they use her as a scapegoat for everything. Is that the right word? Excuse?

• 9:38Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 9:41Speaker 02

  Next.

• 9:42Speaker 01

  I think both of those work.

• 9:44Speaker 03

  I think we can all agree that.

• 9:48Speaker 02

  Do you watch?

• 9:49Speaker 03

  Yeah, I just caught up last night.

• 9:50Speaker 02

  And what happened to Cleveland? Cleveland Erasure.

• 9:54Speaker 03

  It was Cleveland Erasure.

• 9:56Speaker 01

  Well, how was your guys' double date the other night?

• 10:00Speaker 02

  I don't even think we should give him airtime. I'm dead serious.

• 10:05Speaker 03

  I agree.

• 10:06Speaker 02

  I know.

• 10:07Speaker 03

  It's what, it's what, it's what he would have wanted.

• 10:09Speaker 01

  So you don't want to talk about the double date?

• 10:11Speaker 03

  I mean, it was one of the worst nights ever. It was one of the worst.

• 10:14Speaker 02

  Straight fucking tears.

• 10:15Speaker 03

  It was one of the worst nights ever. And like respectfully, like, I think that me and Peyton could go on a date, a double date with two bricks and have a good time.

• 10:21Speaker 02

  Me too. And we would change their life and rock their world.

• 10:23Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 10:24Speaker 02

  And.

• 10:24Speaker 03

  Like us and two pieces of cement. Best night ever.

• 10:28Speaker 02

  You know it's bad when we're sitting under the table.

• 10:35Speaker 03

  It was tears.

• 10:36Speaker 01

  Did you walk in and it was like straight tears right away?

• 10:39Speaker 03

  Yeah, well, baby, you know the answer.

• 10:41Speaker 01

  I just got unseen sunscreen in my eye.

• 10:44Speaker 03

  What, super goop?

• 10:45Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 10:46Speaker 03

  How did it get in your eye like just now?

• 10:48Speaker 01

  It's like gooping all over my face.

• 10:50Speaker 02

  Why are you wearing sunscreen?

• 10:51Speaker 01

  Cause we were supposed to do this on the terrace until I found out the generator was gonna overheat.

• 10:55Speaker 02

  You put on sunscreen to film outside?

• 10:57Speaker 01

  Yes, of course.

• 10:58Speaker 03

  That's good of you.

• 11:00Speaker 01

  Thanks, I'm doing my skincare now.

• 11:02Speaker 03

  Right, you're in your tier, you're in your road era.

• 11:04Speaker 01

  Why'd you guys stop watching Scandal?

• 11:07Speaker 03

  We have so much we're watching right now.

• 11:08Speaker 01

  Have you seen Unknown Number yet?

• 11:09Speaker 02

  No, I wouldn't like that.

• 11:11Speaker 03

  No shot.

• 11:12Speaker 01

  Wait, why, why?

• 11:12Speaker 02

  Just by the name, it sounds scary, too intense.

• 11:15Speaker 01

  You've never heard of Unknown Number, you've neither of you-

• 11:17Speaker 03

  You liked Paradise, that was scary and intense.

• 11:19Speaker 02

  Oh, I loved Paradise. What are you watching, other than Scandal?

• 11:23Speaker 01

  Just Scandal.

• 11:24Speaker 02

  I need them like, oh my god, we saw Shonda at the US Open.

• 11:27Speaker 01

  Did you drop dead?

• 11:29Speaker 02

  It wasn't like that close to us, but we kept being like, holy fuck, it's Shonda, I took photos of her. She was with, she was with Addison Shepherd.

• 11:36Speaker 01

  Are you guys like enjoying New York? You love it, right?

• 11:38Speaker 03

  Yeah, miss you.

• 11:39Speaker 01

  Miss you.

• 11:40Speaker 03

  We're obsessed.

• 11:41Speaker 01

  You love it?

• 11:42Speaker 03

  Yeah, it's so much fun. Do you like our apartment?

• 11:44Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's so cute.

• 11:44Speaker 03

  This is my room.

• 11:45Speaker 01

  It's great. You made your room seem so small, it's like the same size as-

• 11:50Speaker 03

  My room's not small.

• 11:51Speaker 01

  Oh, sorry.

• 11:53Speaker 03

  It's just not set up yet, like I need to do all my art and decorations, it's just like looking like a warehouse right now.

• 11:58Speaker 01

  Yeah, I'm looking around, like, didn't you hire an organizer?

• 12:00Speaker 03

  It's just, they're not finished yet.

• 12:03Speaker 01

  It's been three weeks.

• 12:04Speaker 03

  Cause I, she hasn't been able to come back, I've been so busy.

• 12:07Speaker 01

  Just let her in.

• 12:08Speaker 03

  No, I need to like, watch what she's doing.

• 12:10Speaker 01

  Oh, the go-to girls just go to mine, and I'm like, you go get them.

• 12:14Speaker 03

  Cause I like to like know where my things are, I don't wanna like be confused.

• 12:17Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 12:17Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 12:18Speaker 03

  I, I'll like, like leave her for like a few hours and then like come back. She's supposed to come Thursday, but I probably need to reschedule.

• 12:25Speaker 02

  But we love it here. We were at the box on Friday, until the lights turned on, which is pretty dark.

• 12:33Speaker 01

  It was 4:30 AM, and I, by accidentally, you know I took an Uber to the afters by accident even though I wasn't going there?

• 12:40Speaker 03

  I did know that.

• 12:42Speaker 01

  And then somehow I found Cassidy alone in the lobby of my hotel.

• 12:46Speaker 02

  Cass was alone in the lobby. Cass said that she was going here. But we had so much fun. Did you have fun this weekend?

• 12:52Speaker 01

  So, yeah, but I feel dead. I've like, how do you do this every weekend?

• 12:55Speaker 02

  Every day. This weekend, did it make you feel like, ooh, like, I wanna buy an apartment?

• 13:00Speaker 01

  No.

• 13:01Speaker 02

  Right.

• 13:02Speaker 01

  Like, I will eventually, you know, the, like, if all my stars align, then I'll get a place here.

• 13:11Speaker 02

  You can also stay here whenever you want. Like, I'll sleep in here with her.

• 13:14Speaker 01

  No, I know. Like, that's what I'm saying.

• 13:16Speaker 02

  And you can- He is never gonna stay here. Yeah, like, you're too, like, high-class for that nowadays.

• 13:22Speaker 01

  I'm not too high-class. I just like, if I'm in a different city, like, I would like to stay in a hotel room. Okay, should we close our eyes and all?

• 13:29Speaker 02

  I'm so tired. I'd love to take it out.

• 13:31Speaker 01

  And all think of a word to say, and should we all three try to get to the same word at the same time?

• 13:36Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 13:37Speaker 01

  Cause like, I've never played it with two people before. Okay, ready? Three, two, one, bag. Glam, bag, Conrad. First of all, you were a little second late.

• 13:46Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 13:48Speaker 01

  Okay, so glam, bag, Conrad.

• 13:51Speaker 02

  Okay, ready?

• 13:52Speaker 01

  Three, two, one, Sony Clover. What? Pouch?

• 13:57Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 13:57Speaker 01

  Sony Clover.

• 13:59Speaker 02

  Belly.

• 14:02Speaker 01

  Okay, okay, okay.

• 14:03Speaker 02

  Hey, I don't know that I, like, have the brain power to play this. Okay, wait.

• 14:09Speaker 01

  Three.

• 14:11Speaker 02

  You guys already know what you're gonna say next?

• 14:13Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 14:14Speaker 02

  Oh, you guys are gonna get it, huh?

• 14:16Speaker 01

  Just wait.

• 14:16Speaker 02

  I don't know.

• 14:17Speaker 01

  Okay, think about it.

• 14:18Speaker 02

  Are you taking her into account, her words, or are you just thinking about me?

• 14:20Speaker 01

  In a sick, in a-

• 14:22Speaker 02

  Same.

• 14:22Speaker 01

  In a weird way? Yes, okay, so she was pouch.

• 14:26Speaker 02

  Ah, no, no!

• 14:29Speaker 01

  Three, two, one, suitcase!

• 14:31Speaker 02

  What?

• 14:36Speaker 02

  How was Ashley? That is a jet blue. Belly is taking flights to Paris, and you with the really funny Sony Clover bag. Why did you not get suitcase from pouch and belly with the fucking fuck-ass suitcase?

• 14:47Speaker 01

  Because I thought Sony Clover and then a name. Who do we know from Sony Clover? Ashley, okay, so what was yours?

• 14:52Speaker 02

  Suitcase. I thought mine was so good.

• 14:54Speaker 01

  Suitcase?

• 14:55Speaker 02

  Jet blue. Ashley.

• 14:56Speaker 01

  Okay, ready?

• 14:57Speaker 02

  Wait, no.

• 14:58Speaker 01

  Really think about it for a second.

• 15:00Speaker 02

  No.

• 15:02Speaker 01

  Suitcase.

• 15:04Speaker 02

  Ashley.

• 15:05Speaker 01

  And, and what was yours? Suitcase JetBlue Ashley.

• 15:08Speaker 02

  JetBlue bitch, what? It checks. When he had that really funny photo shoot with his Stony Clover bag on a JetBlue floor.

• 15:14Speaker 01

  Oh wow, you thought about it.

• 15:16Speaker 02

  And belly, going to Paris.

• 15:17Speaker 01

  Okay, I, I have mine. Do you have yours?

• 15:19Speaker 02

  I don't.

• 15:21Speaker 01

  Think about it. You have it.

• 15:23Speaker 02

  But we're talking about Stony Clover Ashley?

• 15:25Speaker 01

  No, but like, just-

• 15:27Speaker 02

  Think about what you just said.

• 15:29Speaker 01

  Stop, you're ruining the game!

• 15:30Speaker 02

  Sorry, sorry, she like needs some help. I know, I'm not gonna get it. Cause I know the word that I'm thinking right now, it's just like-

• 15:35Speaker 01

  Just do it anyway.

• 15:36Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 15:36Speaker 01

  Three, two, one, Jundee. Did you say why?

• 15:40Speaker 02

  I said Hawaii.

• 15:45Speaker 01

  Jundee Hawaii away.

• 15:48Speaker 01

  Why did you say Hawaii?

• 15:50Speaker 02

  What's wrong with you?

• 15:55Speaker 01

  Okay, should we start one more time? Just like start from the beginning. Actually, I do wanna get this. Okay, ready?

• 16:00Speaker 02

  From the beginning?

• 16:00Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 16:01Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 16:02Speaker 01

  Three, two, one, camera. You're so late. Camera, Lola what?

• 16:07Speaker 02

  Rap.

• 16:09Speaker 01

  Lola, rap, camera.

• 16:11Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 16:12Speaker 01

  Three, two, one, language.

• 16:16Speaker 01

  What were you gonna say?

• 16:21Speaker 01

  What did you say?

• 16:23Speaker 02

  Burrito. Burrito's giving like blanket.

• 16:26Speaker 01

  Oh, okay.

• 16:27Speaker 02

  That's not bad.

• 16:31Speaker 01

  What are you two therapists about today?

• 16:33Speaker 02

  Nothing.

• 16:33Speaker 01

  Oh my god. You're always angry about something, so I know that's not true.

• 16:37Speaker 02

  Fuck you.

• 16:38Speaker 01

  What are you angry about?

• 16:41Speaker 02

  Probably- I am snorting this episode, I keep moving. Every morning, I- Every morning her alarm goes off.

• 16:55Speaker 02

  Like, am I just chronically congested? Like, I seriously like- We already addressed that. But it's like, am I? Like, do I have allergies maybe? I'm pissed about my lack of sleep.

• 17:04Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 17:05Speaker 02

  We need to like further debrief our weekend. I feel like we did so much. I got nothing to say.

• 17:09Speaker 01

  She's, Julia literally wasn't there.

• 17:12Speaker 03

  Why are you saying that? That's rude.

• 17:13Speaker 01

  You weren't there.

• 17:14Speaker 03

  I was not there for one night, like, and all of a sudden I don't exist.

• 17:18Speaker 01

  Well, I don't know why you didn't come out Saturday.

• 17:19Speaker 03

  I literally had plans, you couldn't.

• 17:21Speaker 01

  Saturday was the best night ever. Saturday was better than Friday.

• 17:23Speaker 03

  Okay. Saturday? I know you do things just to make me upset.

• 17:27Speaker 01

  Well, no, I, I, I personally, for personal reasons, had a better Saturday.

• 17:32Speaker 03

  So, so I guess you're wondering, what has it been like?

• 17:35Speaker 01

  In New York.

• 17:36Speaker 03

  It is so fucking fun. Sorry, maybe you didn't want to hear that. Ah!

• 17:42Speaker 01

  Tell them how fun it's been.

• 17:44Speaker 03

  It's been so much fun. We literally have not had a singular moment of, without a plan. We're just bit, pop, pop, popping around.

• 17:51Speaker 02

  I saw a meme the other day and it was like, me and my bestie's friendship bracelets, and it was handcuffs. I was like, yeah. That is how I would describe our first three weeks in New York.

• 18:00Speaker 03

  Yeah, we've, we've just been...

• 18:02Speaker 01

  Do you feel like you're in Sex and the City or Girls?

• 18:05Speaker 03

  Neither, honestly. I don't feel like I'm in either. Um, Girls is a little too tears for our experience thus far. Sex and the City, um, we are being like way more of degenerates.

• 18:19Speaker 02

  So, we're not, you don't even watch. But, yeah, we've been having a lot of fun.

• 18:23Speaker 01

  You tried to watch an episode, did you like it?

• 18:25Speaker 02

  We started Sex and the City and I loved it.

• 18:27Speaker 01

  Did you really?

• 18:28Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 18:28Speaker 01

  I can't get behind it.

• 18:30Speaker 03

  Like, do you want to know something about you? You hate fun.

• 18:33Speaker 01

  No, I don't. I like so many good television shows.

• 18:36Speaker 03

  No, you don't. What is your favorite show of all time?

• 18:39Speaker 01

  Dark.

• 18:39Speaker 03

  Yeah, and it's like literally a show from hell.

• 18:42Speaker 01

  It's a show, it's a German show about a German boy that goes missing in a small German town.

• 18:47Speaker 03

  What do you think we want to watch? The Sex, The Summer I Turned Pretty, Sex and the City, or Dark?

• 18:52Speaker 01

  Okay, what's your favorite sink from The Summer I Turned Pretty? Your favorite needle drop?

• 18:56Speaker 03

  I really, really, How Did It End was pretty insane.

• 19:00Speaker 02

  How Did It End? We had tears. I literally looked over and I had tears.

• 19:03Speaker 03

  Sorry, Jenny. That episode was bad. And when How Did It End came on, I was like...

• 19:08Speaker 01

  So, how is this?

• 19:09Speaker 02

  I feel like mine is probably You're Losing Me because obviously it was like our favorite song ever.

• 19:14Speaker 03

  Also, when they did False God, it was pretty crazy.

• 19:16Speaker 02

  Fucking crazy.

• 19:17Speaker 03

  False God was during the scene where like Belly got like the hots for him again.

• 19:20Speaker 02

  And False God was also in season one.

• 19:22Speaker 03

  In season one. They like redid it for like when they first fell in love in season one. I also thought Robin was really cute.

• 19:28Speaker 01

  They did Robin.

• 19:28Speaker 02

  Oh, and the with the glass unicorn.

• 19:31Speaker 03

  Yeah, that was good.

• 19:31Speaker 01

  What they did with Robin.

• 19:32Speaker 03

  And he got me my unicorn and he got me my mom.

• 19:34Speaker 02

  That episode, I think that episode I think was my favorite.

• 19:36Speaker 03

  It was, it was the best, yeah. It was the best one.

• 19:39Speaker 02

  It was so good.

• 19:40Speaker 03

  Don't marry him.

• 19:41Speaker 02

  That's what we were like longing for the whole season.

• 19:44Speaker 03

  Don't marry him.

• 19:45Speaker 02

  Um.

• 19:46Speaker 01

  So you're watching Walter Brothers.

• 19:48Speaker 02

  We're watching Sex and the City. We're watching, well, we were talking about New York too.

• 19:53Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah. Like what's been your favorite extracurricular you've done here?

• 19:57Speaker 02

  Oh, well, this was just like an example, but we went on like

• 20:01Speaker 03

  We went to dinner on like a Tuesday.

• 20:03Speaker 02

  We went to dinner on a Tuesday and we literally got like two spritzes and we ended up at a bar until like three in the morning and it was just so much fun.

• 20:10Speaker 03

  On a Tuesday.

• 20:11Speaker 02

  And it's like we had two spritzes, sat outside, it was so nice out, like it was just such a good vibe.

• 20:16Speaker 03

  Oh, and, and, and I've been getting so many steps. I've been getting like seventeen thousand steps every day.

• 20:22Speaker 02

  Oh, okay. So something about me is I hate walking and I, I was like, okay, like New York is gonna be bad for me because I literally hate walking. And for some reason I find it so boring and like unenjoyable, but I've been loving it here.

• 20:38Speaker 01

  Do you listen to music as you walk?

• 20:40Speaker 02

  Not even, not even, like sometimes if I'm alone, but I like to walk like with purpose, like with a destination.

• 20:46Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah. I hate walking without a destination.

• 20:49Speaker 02

  I feel like a lot of people love to like aimlessly walk. It's like that's my worst nightmare.

• 20:52Speaker 01

  It's my worst nightmare. I can't do that.

• 20:53Speaker 02

  So I've been loving getting steps in New York, which I like because it's like if you can't work out that day, like you don't feel like you did nothing. It's like.

• 21:01Speaker 03

  I mean, speaking of having worked out, I haven't done a lot of that.

• 21:05Speaker 01

  I tried to work out today and I like felt dead. I think it's because of all the drinking.

• 21:09Speaker 03

  I'm so tired.

• 21:11Speaker 01

  It must, it must be the drinking. I'm like exhausted. I've done it every day for the past five days.

• 21:16Speaker 02

  Same.

• 21:17Speaker 01

  Like my eyes are closing.

• 21:18Speaker 02

  I literally feel like we haven't slept since we moved.

• 21:21Speaker 03

  We haven't. I've like gotten nothing, there's nothing in my head.

• 21:25Speaker 01

  So how are you guys planning on decorating the main room?

• 21:27Speaker 03

  Okay, actually, thank you for bringing it up.

• 21:29Speaker 01

  Of course.

• 21:30Speaker 03

  So the TV, um, actually takes up

• 21:34Speaker 02

  the entire wall. I accidentally, like, we measured it and I think it's just like bigger than it.

• 21:39Speaker 01

  That's fine, it's a big TV. You watch a lot of TV.

• 21:41Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 21:42Speaker 03

  So we're getting this really cool couch. It's like, um, we don't have a lot of space to work with at all, but we're getting, uh, like really cool, like corduroy.

• 21:52Speaker 02

  Are we getting that?

• 21:53Speaker 03

  Couch. I mean, that's the plan.

• 21:55Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 21:56Speaker 03

  We can't get anything right now, baby.

• 21:57Speaker 02

  No, it's messy in there.

• 21:59Speaker 03

  Um.

• 22:00Speaker 01

  I mean, it's a fulfillment center.

• 22:01Speaker 02

  But the couch is sick. You'll love it.

• 22:04Speaker 01

  I'm excited.

• 22:04Speaker 03

  And it like kind of unfolds, so like if you want to turn it into a sectional, you can unfold it. It's really cool. It comes in tons of really cool colors, um, a small coffee table and like some really fun rug and then

• 22:17Speaker 03

  we're gonna make a coffee table like out of, we're gonna like DIY coffee table out of magazines stacked.

• 22:23Speaker 02

  Next to the couch?

• 22:25Speaker 03

  It's really cool.

• 22:25Speaker 02

  Stacked up magazines and we're gonna put glass over it.

• 22:28Speaker 03

  I don't like how you genuinely couldn't be happy for us if you tried.

• 22:31Speaker 01

  No, I am happy. I'm just like, what? How is that, are you gonna glue them together?

• 22:36Speaker 03

  No, no.

• 22:37Speaker 02

  What about that do you not like?

• 22:38Speaker 01

  Are you gonna glue the magazines together?

• 22:40Speaker 03

  No, it's like

• 22:42Speaker 02

  Stack it up.

• 22:43Speaker 01

  And what if it falls? Can you grab me my water? Mama's thirsty. Should we close our eyes for two minutes?

• 22:49Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 22:49Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 22:51Speaker 03

  Let's kind of like this.

• 22:53Speaker 01

  Oh, those are books, Julia.

• 22:55Speaker 03

  No, no, but like with magazines, like this.

• 22:56Speaker 01

  Okay, ready, just?

• 22:57Speaker 02

  I'll set a one minute timer.

• 22:59Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 22:59Speaker 02

  One minute, thirty seconds.

• 23:00Speaker 01

  And everybody think of stuff to talk about as we close our eyes.

• 23:03Speaker 03

  I'm gonna have nothing. My head is empty. Sorry, I haven't been holding my microphone.

• 23:10Speaker 01

  Are you thinking?

• 23:12Speaker 03

  Yeah, I'm trying.

• 23:14Speaker 01

  Oh, I wanna sleep.

• 23:16Speaker 03

  I have a funny story.

• 23:17Speaker 01

  Oh, great. This was well worth it then. What's the funny story about?

• 23:21Speaker 03

  This date I went on.

• 23:22Speaker 01

  When?

• 23:24Speaker 03

  Few weeks ago.

• 23:25Speaker 01

  What was so funny about it?

• 23:26Speaker 03

  Uh, I almost projectile vomited because we were on a boat.

• 23:30Speaker 01

  How'd you get on the boat?

• 23:31Speaker 03

  So like, he texted me that we'll go on a date in Tribeca. And he was like, okay, I picked this spot. Grand Banks.

• 23:43Speaker 01

  Wait, my eyes are closed.

• 23:45Speaker 03

  So should I wait?

• 23:45Speaker 02

  No, keep going. It's like a lullaby.

• 23:48Speaker 01

  Yeah, honestly.

• 23:49Speaker 02

  And it's about boys, which is even better.

• 23:51Speaker 03

  He was like, okay, so we'll go to this place, Graham, bang.

• 23:56Speaker 02

  I heard that sound!

• 23:58Speaker 01

  That's your alarm, Pian?

• 24:00Speaker 03

  What, isn't that everyone's alarm?

• 24:01Speaker 01

  No!

• 24:02Speaker 02

  What sound do you guys use?

• 24:04Speaker 01

  That's your alarm, mine is like the normal.

• 24:06Speaker 03

  Yeah, that's mine.

• 24:07Speaker 02

  Keep telling the story.

• 24:08Speaker 01

  So you went on a boat and he almost projected, and you almost projected.

• 24:11Speaker 03

  Alright, so I had dinner, a dinner before this date. Um, I was, like, like I said, we have not had a minute to do anything, so I've been like triple booking sometimes. Like, we had a dinner, we went to the corner store, and I was like, I'm not fucking cancelling this dinner, I really want to.

• 24:24Speaker 02

  It was just amazing.

• 24:25Speaker 01

  What'd you guys get there? Louise and I went there.

• 24:27Speaker 02

  Pizza rolls, a French dip, Samoa sundae.

• 24:31Speaker 01

  Samoa sundae?

• 24:32Speaker 02

  Julia left before the ice cream.

• 24:33Speaker 03

  Everything bagel, um.

• 24:35Speaker 02

  Caesar salad?

• 24:36Speaker 03

  Caesar salad.

• 24:37Speaker 02

  Keep talking about the man.

• 24:38Speaker 03

  Okay, so basically, I had this dinner at the corner store, I had like two or three tomato martinis.

• 24:45Speaker 01

  Ew.

• 24:47Speaker 03

  I hate you.

• 24:48Speaker 01

  Ew.

• 24:49Speaker 03

  I hate you.

• 24:49Speaker 02

  It was good.

• 24:50Speaker 03

  I don't like, I don't like hanging out with you, I don't like telling you things, I don't like doing anything with you because you are just so fucking negative.

• 24:58Speaker 01

  Wait, I'm just confused, a tomato martini?

• 25:00Speaker 03

  Were you at this restaurant or not?

• 25:02Speaker 01

  Yes, what, did they put a sliced tomato out the rim?

• 25:05Speaker 02

  Their whole thing is special martinis. Mine was sour creme de neige.

• 25:09Speaker 01

  Ew.

• 25:11Speaker 02

  It came with sour creme de neige and chips, obviously, not enough chips, there were only like two.

• 25:15Speaker 03

  What did you get, a reesling?

• 25:17Speaker 01

  Yeah, I think I probably tried.

• 25:18Speaker 03

  Yeah, and you probably fell the fuck to sleep at the table. Like, I don't want your reesling.

• 25:24Speaker 01

  I, but you know my favorite martini in the city is at Sarantino's?

• 25:27Speaker 03

  Sarantino's.

• 25:30Speaker 03

  And like.

• 25:32Speaker 01

  And they have a truffle martini with caviar.

• 25:35Speaker 03

  Yeah, and you're gonna go all crazy about my tomato martini, meanwhile you have fish eggs in yours?

• 25:39Speaker 01

  Yeah, that sounds good.

• 25:41Speaker 02

  That's my worst nightmare, continue on the boat.

• 25:43Speaker 03

  I had like three tomato martinis, I had pizza rolls with like ranch.

• 25:48Speaker 02

  I want two, babe, and ranch.

• 25:50Speaker 03

  This is zero, zero.

• 25:52Speaker 02

  You know how Selena, how Benny Blanco gave Selena Gomez a bathtub of queso, I want a bathtub of ranch. So if my husband is listening or wants to come back on this at some point, I want a bathtub of ranch, continue.

• 26:05Speaker 01

  That would like fuck your pH so bad.

• 26:07Speaker 02

  One thousand percent.

• 26:13Speaker 02

  Like, there is ranch in every fucking crevice, right? Just up your ass, and like, I'm not mad.

• 26:21Speaker 01

  What is ranch made out of?

• 26:22Speaker 02

  I don't know.

• 26:23Speaker 01

  God, we need to talk about something else, okay?

• 26:26Speaker 02

  Julia is telling the story.

• 26:28Speaker 03

  Oh, I totally forgot, you don't let me speak.

• 26:30Speaker 01

  Okay, go, keep going.

• 26:32Speaker 03

  So I had to speak.

• 26:36Speaker 01

  Okay, go, tell the story. You got a tomato martini.

• 26:40Speaker 03

  It was just like a heavy meal.

• 26:45Speaker 03

  And it got heavier after you left. So I like, definitely felt like a little like, huh.

• 26:55Speaker 03

  Like a little creepy.

• 26:56Speaker 01

  Were you farting?

• 26:57Speaker 03

  No, I wasn't farting, but like, I definitely was burping, and like, I was just like, it was a big meal. Like, I definitely like, was not holding back, like, I, you know, like, sometimes when you go to like, um, a meal with like, a group, or like, an uneven amount of people, and there's like, four pizza rolls, so it's like, no one eats the last, like, I ate the last.

• 27:16Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 27:16Speaker 03

  Like, I was going for it.

• 27:18Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 27:18Speaker 03

  I like, didn't do too much research into this place, um, before we got, before I went on this date. And, so I'm like, pizza rolls, martinis, et cetera, et cetera, like, I'm just not feeling great. I get in the car, and I'm already like, a little bit like, eh, I could totally lie down. And I get to the date, and I knew it was on a boat, but I didn't like, fully like, visualize that it was on a boat on the Hudson, so it smelled bad, and it smelled like, like, it smelled like fish.

• 27:50Speaker 01

  I don't mind that.

• 27:53Speaker 03

  Yeah, I do. It was windy, like, it was like, um,

• 27:59Speaker 01

  My dream.

• 27:59Speaker 03

  A particular,

• 28:00Speaker 01

  My dream date, cute.

• 28:01Speaker 03

  A particularly, a fishy windy boat.

• 28:04Speaker 01

  Amazing.

• 28:04Speaker 03

  Being nauseous.

• 28:06Speaker 01

  Well, I, I don't get nauseous on boats, but this isn't about me, continue.

• 28:11Speaker 03

  Okay, so, we're sitting there, and like, I just like, sometimes feel like, on dates, like, I'm the one that's like, leading the conversations usually, just because like, I, I feel like I could probably talk more than the average, like, I, I'm bringing things up.

• 28:23Speaker 02

  Yeah, this story's long.

• 28:26Speaker 03

  Okay, I'll continue.

• 28:26Speaker 02

  I'll shut up.

• 28:27Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 28:28Speaker 02

  I do want to hear.

• 28:28Speaker 03

  No, we have nothing else to talk about.

• 28:30Speaker 01

  No, I was about to say, I mean, I was about to say, when I woke up with someone in my room this morning, they said to me, um, you could keep frozen poultry in this room, it's so cold.

• 28:44Speaker 01

  Need to do a lap.

• 28:45Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 28:46Speaker 02

  Nice. Frozen poultry?

• 28:49Speaker 03

  And I would have hated if someone said that to me.

• 28:51Speaker 01

  Yeah, it really fucked me up, honestly.

• 28:57Speaker 02

  Yeah, okay, so you're sitting on this boat, also despite all these horrible things like we're saying about the location, it honestly sounds fun and I kind of want to go back, like maybe on a Saturday during the day.

• 29:06Speaker 01

  Sounds so fun to me, continue. So you're nauseous on the boat?

• 29:09Speaker 03

  And it's just like rocking, rocking, rocking, and like I literally like, I think I probably was like green in the face, like, I think he was probably looking at me like, oh fuck.

• 29:17Speaker 02

  Okay, so then you guys left and you went to a bar?

• 29:20Speaker 03

  We went to like three other bars after that, like we had a really long day, I was like trying to leave and meet my friends and he was kind of just like, no, I don't think you should do that.

• 29:26Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 29:27Speaker 03

  No, we had a good time, I enjoyed it, but like, yeah, I was like pretty much nauseous for the rest of the date, um, yeah, I haven't followed up for the second one that he asked me on, but...

• 29:38Speaker 01

  Well, I had the best first date of my life Saturday.

• 29:40Speaker 02

  Oh. I loved him, I was there for part of it.

• 29:43Speaker 01

  I'm sorry, you met him last night though, but I went on a first date Saturday and we got drinks and then we met up with Peyton and Cassidy at this restaurant called Lucian and...

• 29:54Speaker 02

  It was the best vibes ever.

• 29:55Speaker 01

  It was the best vibes ever.

• 29:56Speaker 02

  I had ten Cosmos and it was, and Jake, in this date, I've never seen Jake with a guy who they seem like so into each other, like...

• 30:05Speaker 03

  Sorry, I know I'm erased from your fucking memory, but I did meet him last night.

• 30:08Speaker 02

  In a tasteful way, like, they were holding on to each other, it was just like very sweet and wholesome.

• 30:13Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 30:14Speaker 02

  We also, this weekend, when we were in the Hamptons, Julia, mama, got us a table at Surf Lodge and it was so much fun, but we had to get like a million things of alcohol because there was like a table minimum, we have to hit this minimum, we're looking at the menu at Surf Lodge, obviously our first thought is let's get fourteen towers of chicken tenders, but we're like, we obviously also need to get all these bottles, we get a big bottle of Grey Goose and the night is coming to an end, it's dwindling down, the big bottle of Grey Goose is still like... Half full.

• 30:49Speaker 01

  Right.

• 30:50Speaker 02

  Over my dead body, were we leaving a half full bottle of Grey Goose at the club?

• 30:54Speaker 03

  It was like a giant bottle.

• 30:55Speaker 02

  To be taken. So, I put it in my pants and I leave, I leave. And I was carrying around this Grey Goose bottle the entire night.

• 31:07Speaker 03

  I have a picture for you to insert.

• 31:08Speaker 02

  The entire night. We go to the next location. Every single bar we went to after that, I would just order a chaser and I would take the bottle out of my skirt and just take my own shot.

• 31:20Speaker 01

  Wait, are you serious?

• 31:21Speaker 02

  Dead serious.

• 31:22Speaker 01

  And no one caught you?

• 31:24Speaker 02

  No. And then we're leaving the club, or the, wherever, like the bar we were at. And it dropped on the ground and it was really funny.

• 31:31Speaker 01

  Did it get shattered? What ice cream is that?

• 31:33Speaker 03

  Oh, how good does that look?

• 31:35Speaker 01

  Ooh.

• 31:36Speaker 03

  This Froyo place in Long Island.

• 31:38Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 31:40Speaker 01

  Does it make you guys sad that we don't know anybody at USC anymore?

• 31:44Speaker 02

  Yeah. It does.

• 31:47Speaker 01

  Like, we don't know a single person in a single grade. I don't know anyone.

• 31:51Speaker 02

  It's really crazy because now we're like, we're like full.

• 31:53Speaker 03

  I saw a TikTok the other day that was like,

• 31:57Speaker 03

  like, a girl, like, these girls, like, drinking, like, in the morning for a football game at college.

• 32:04Speaker 02

  What college? Do you remember?

• 32:06Speaker 03

  No, I was like half asleep. But I was just like, fuck.

• 32:09Speaker 01

  Those were the best days ever. We'd wake up and just.

• 32:11Speaker 03

  And like a tailgate, a tailgate was like, all bets are fucking off. You could act however you wanted. You could get however wasted you wanted. Like, you could do whatever you wanted. And then, you just passed out.

• 32:22Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 32:22Speaker 03

  And you'd wake up and it'd be like, damn.

• 32:24Speaker 02

  Have we ever talked about Orange and Teal, you guys?

• 32:27Speaker 01

  On the podcast? Yeah, we've talked about Orange and Teal, have we?

• 32:30Speaker 03

  We like, there was this like Snapchat filter when we were freshmen in college called Orange and Teal. God knows what we were doing.

• 32:36Speaker 01

  Game day was just, what was your favorite, oh, I feel like we only had game days really, I feel like only freshman, sophomore and senior, right? Because junior was COVID.

• 32:44Speaker 02

  Yeah, there was no game days. What were you saying about college before Orange and Teal?

• 32:49Speaker 01

  That game days were the best day ever and then when you would try to go out at night and like you'd kind of fail but you would just like be at the party in like sweats and a game day t-shirt and be like I'm so tired but like I had to go out.

• 32:57Speaker 02

  It would be you'd be like at an office. Why do you think the nine no never hit for us?

• 33:01Speaker 01

  It's because we can't wait in the line to save our lives.

• 33:03Speaker 02

  No, but I also think it's because like we were the only grade that truly had banditos. Yeah.

• 33:08Speaker 01

  Also, we had second semester rush.

• 33:11Speaker 02

  Right.

• 33:12Speaker 01

  So we never had to like if everyone had first semester rush right before everyone was going to mixers and stuff all the time. We only had banditos. We only had banditos and respectfully, banditos was genuinely life-changing for me. It was a playground like.

• 33:29Speaker 02

  It was the best place ever and I feel like we already had that moment of being like obsessed and addicted to the bar and like knowing the bartender and doing knowing like who ran it and everything and like running the place to the ground. I feel like we had that moment already. So then the nine oh it was just like, okay.

• 33:44Speaker 01

  Do you remember when somebody fucked in the back room of Banditos?

• 33:47Speaker 02

  What?

• 33:48Speaker 01

  Posted it on her Instagram and said, who is this?

• 33:50Speaker 02

  No.

• 33:51Speaker 01

  You don't remember that?

• 33:52Speaker 02

  No. Did that actually happen?

• 33:54Speaker 01

  Or she was sucking his dick or something. Yes. And she posted like, if you fuck at Banditos, like you'll get caught.

• 34:00Speaker 02

  But like I also low-key feel like was down for you to fuck at Banditos. Like was actually.

• 34:06Speaker 01

  Okay. You want to know something about Banditos?

• 34:08Speaker 02

  What?

• 34:09Speaker 01

  The food there was amazing.

• 34:10Speaker 02

  Amazing. Yeah. Also, the TikToks now of everyone in New North is just.

• 34:16Speaker 01

  That's my 13th reason.

• 34:17Speaker 02

  Great jest.

• 34:17Speaker 01

  That's my 13th reason.

• 34:18Speaker 02

  I miss New North.

• 34:19Speaker 01

  Do you remember when Evan used to brush her teeth every night and she would gag on her toothbrush every night?

• 34:25Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 34:26Speaker 01

  Peyton had the best roommate in the world, Evan.

• 34:29Speaker 02

  And Jake, our room was just like so disgusting and we would just do whatever we wanted. And one time we all got mad at Jake after this party. And we ordered pizza and Jake like wanted to come like redeem himself after he had pissed off every single person we were just making friends with. And we ordered, we ordered a pizza and Jake is banging on the door being like, please let me in. We're like, fine. We open the door, Jake steps into the room. He puts his fucking dirty Air Force right into the fresh pizza and then steps on the carpet.

• 35:08Speaker 01

  And it was there the entire year. Do you remember Peyton's fridge?

• 35:11Speaker 02

  An Air Force, an Air Force print of marinara sauce in my perfect carpet.

• 35:15Speaker 01

  Wait, do you remember your fridge?

• 35:17Speaker 02

  No.

• 35:17Speaker 03

  Peyton's carpet was never fucking perfect. You have the worst carpet taste of all, of all time.

• 35:22Speaker 02

  I didn't, I didn't even pick that out.

• 35:23Speaker 03

  Okay, well.

• 35:24Speaker 01

  What about the candy carpet?

• 35:25Speaker 03

  Yeah, that's what I'm talking about.

• 35:26Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 35:27Speaker 03

  Peyton's like, we, Peyton shared a room sophomore year and she's like, perfect. I, I got us the best carpet in all of Target.

• 35:32Speaker 02

  From the Target.

• 35:33Speaker 03

  It's from the nursery section. It looked like a fun, fatty bath mat.

• 35:36Speaker 02

  And it was also the size of a bath mat.

• 35:38Speaker 03

  That's what I'm saying, fun, fatty bath mat.

• 35:40Speaker 02

  It was tiny.

• 35:41Speaker 03

  My mom and I walked in and we were like, um.

• 35:43Speaker 02

  So then Julie and I ordered a neon pink carpet.

• 35:46Speaker 01

  Do you remember, what would you call her again? Clicker? Cause she would go on the Roku.

• 35:50Speaker 03

  Cause I'm just like not good with technology.

• 35:53Speaker 01

  You've gotten a lot better.

• 35:55Speaker 03

  Yeah, I just like, don't know how to work like anything. And so I'm like really bad with a remote control. Like it takes me seven years to like type a letter in and Peyton's just like.

• 36:05Speaker 01

  You work so quick with it. It's crazy.

• 36:07Speaker 02

  You guys wanna know what we're gonna have to wait and watch together?

• 36:11Speaker 01

  What?

• 36:12Speaker 02

  Do you guys wanna guess?

• 36:14Speaker 01

  Okay. Can you give, will they give it away?

• 36:16Speaker 03

  I have literally no idea.

• 36:17Speaker 01

  Wait, stop.

• 36:18Speaker 02

  There's a new movie coming out and it's like, yes.

• 36:21Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 36:21Speaker 01

  Oh, obviously. Oh, also, also, I'm about to finish Scandal. I think we should watch How to Get Away with Murder.

• 36:27Speaker 02

  We tried.

• 36:28Speaker 01

  No, you did not try. If you tried, you would have been into it. It's really good.

• 36:31Speaker 03

  Yeah, it's amazing.

• 36:31Speaker 02

  I tried and watched like at least five episodes, but I'm down to retry.

• 36:35Speaker 01

  Dude, it's like a electric show.

• 36:37Speaker 03

  But like, I don't really remember.

• 36:39Speaker 01

  Apparently it only gets better, like way better than season one. Like season one's good, but the rest of the show is like.

• 36:44Speaker 03

  I feel like most shows are like that. Like season one usually is not good.

• 36:47Speaker 01

  Okay. Oh my God. I need to talk about this in one thing in Scandal. I think if Steven would have stayed in the show, like him and Olivia, like he, I read a.

• 36:56Speaker 03

  He's hot. Yeah.

• 36:57Speaker 01

  Comment on TikTok that was like, he is the only one that understood Olivia. Like he like understood her on like a different level.

• 37:03Speaker 02

  It's true.

• 37:03Speaker 01

  I'm gonna be sick.

• 37:04Speaker 02

  I know.

• 37:05Speaker 01

  You know, and he didn't leave on Bad Blood either.

• 37:07Speaker 02

  No.

• 37:07Speaker 01

  He left cause they didn't think the show was gonna get renewed for season two. And he was like, well, I need to pursue other opportunities if the show is not getting renewed. Have you guys seen Teen Wolf?

• 37:17Speaker 02

  We tried, we all tried to watch.

• 37:20Speaker 01

  Yeah, it was great. I rewatched the first episode the other day.

• 37:22Speaker 03

  Are you guys normal or do you also play that? While watching, walking through the street?

• 37:27Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 37:29Speaker 02

  Julia and I were saying this the other day.

• 37:31Speaker 03

  If we can't see their face, we say S from the B, Smash from the back.

• 37:34Speaker 02

  Yeah, S from the B. Every single person I see, like the first thing I think is Smash or Pass.

• 37:41Speaker 01

  Should we sit on the West Side Highway tomorrow? Well, not on the highway, but like

• 37:44Speaker 02

  And play Smash or Pass?

• 37:45Speaker 01

  The park and play Smash or Pass?

• 37:46Speaker 02

  Yeah, I want to. And I want to, yeah.

• 37:50Speaker 03

  Is everyone as tired as me?

• 37:51Speaker 01

  Yes, exhausted.

• 37:52Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 37:52Speaker 01

  Okay, do you want to get into the Tell Me What's Wrong?

• 37:54Speaker 03

  Of course I do.

• 37:55Speaker 02

  I want to.

• 37:56Speaker 01

  These Tell Me What's Wrong are sponsored by Bumble. Can you please talk about the transition into a new relationship after a breakup? Well, there's only one person here to answer that properly, and that is Julia.

• 38:06Speaker 03

  No, listen, like, I don't know, I think that everyone has a different experience. Personally, for me, like, everyone that I've been dating since I broke up with my ex-boyfriend, I'm super grateful for these experiences because I wanted them.

• 38:25Speaker 03

  But yeah, I think that I might like, personally for me, I feel like it's just gonna like take a minute to like like someone again.

• 38:30Speaker 02

  But like, that's why you were wanting to have a single moment, because it's like you were wanting to have fun and like, just be single and like not be calling to anyone and like.

• 38:39Speaker 03

  But I know that I'm the problem. See, like, that's why I'm not fit to be.

• 38:42Speaker 01

  Can I be honest, though? I don't think you are in this first case. Because I think, remember the one person you were going on dates with now?

• 38:51Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 38:51Speaker 01

  And the reason you didn't go on a first date with him two years ago is because, or three years ago, is because like something like fateful got in the way. Like, you literally fell down a flight of stairs.

• 39:01Speaker 01

  That was like a god telling you, like, do not see this man, I'm gonna push you down a flight of stairs.

• 39:05Speaker 02

  God pushed you.

• 39:06Speaker 01

  He was like, I do not want you to see this man.

• 39:08Speaker 03

  I just think that, like...

• 39:12Speaker 03

  After a breakup, you should really focus on yourself.

• 39:15Speaker 02

  It's like fun and it's like you can do whatever the fuck you want. You're wearing the pants, you have the power and it's like if you wanna like end anything, you can.

• 39:23Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 39:24Speaker 01

  How do you find confidence in yourself to go on Bumble dates? I get so scared to me. Well, I feel like I'm the, I've been going on a lot of Bumble dates recently, so I'll, I'll take this one if that's fine with you guys.

• 39:32Speaker 03

  Yeah, please do.

• 39:33Speaker 01

  I went on, look, some dates are gonna be horrible and some dates are gonna be amazing.

• 39:38Speaker 03

  Going on a date is like the outcome is like one of like a very few things. A, a funny story. B, a good experience. C, you met someone that you're gonna have a relationship with.

• 39:49Speaker 02

  Yeah, I will say Julia usually has like the best advice about going on a first date. Cause like I personally get so, so nervous. Like even if it's a guy that I know most likely I like don't have a lot in common with, or like I know that I like probably won't vibe with, or it's someone that I like wasn't super interested from the jump.

• 40:05Speaker 03

  We're gonna have a laugh about it later.

• 40:07Speaker 01

  One time this guy pop box his car with a vape.

• 40:11Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah. It was super dark and he opened his Dropbox and started playing me new music and I said, hey, please take me home.

• 40:20Speaker 02

  Um, that was not okay. Julia always encourages me and is like, it's not that serious. It's so much fun. Like just go. So I feel like you need to have someone in your corner who's just like hyping you up and

• 40:33Speaker 01

  That's what you guys are for me.

• 40:33Speaker 02

  reassuring you that it's like not that serious. Cause like it isn't like the stakes are low. Like go on the date and like if it sucks, go home. Like always have a scapegoat and always.

• 40:41Speaker 01

  My scapegoat is always Cassidy. Always.

• 40:44Speaker 02

  Yeah, it is. And always make sure if it's a new person that you like, aren't having a lot of mutuals with, like make sure your friends have your location.

• 40:50Speaker 01

  Well, on Bumble, you can use the share my date feature. And if you're anxious, like, and if you're scared to go on the date, you can share like the time, location.

• 40:57Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 40:58Speaker 01

  And you can send it to like your friends and family on Bumble and like share your date.

• 41:01Speaker 03

  Cool.

• 41:02Speaker 02

  I feel like that's really important and it honestly gives you like that security that you know, like your friends know where you are. Like it's. It's all good. It's all good.

• 41:11Speaker 01

  Well, we prescribe denim on denim because even, thank you, because even, even some of the worst dates make the best stories.

• 41:18Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 41:19Speaker 01

  A friend of mine is constantly talking about how she never gets any attention from men.

• 41:23Speaker 02

  Me.

• 41:23Speaker 01

  Like, well, she always saying how she'll die alone, or how she'll never get married, but she's gone on dates and is currently in some type of situationship and has many, capitalize, ooh, oh, guys fawn over her.

• 41:36Speaker 02

  Not me.

• 41:36Speaker 01

  It usually doesn't make me upset, but as of recently, I've found it makes me feel bad because I've never experienced any of that. And it's like she's tone deaf to how I feel, almost as if she's blind to all the attention she gets. Moral of the story is I don't care what to do anymore. Am I a bad friend for thinking she's being oblivious to my feelings or for even feeling any type of way about this? Wow, what an actual deep question.

• 41:59Speaker 02

  Wow, I love that question.

• 42:00Speaker 01

  It should make you feel better that like even the people, like it should make you feel better that like, attention from romantic partners does not validate any type of insecurity you harbor inside.

• 42:14Speaker 01

  Thanks.

• 42:14Speaker 02

  A simple mic drop for that.

• 42:16Speaker 01

  Thank you. I know. Well, because it's true. Because like, I have gay friends that literally get fawned over by like, a million and one guys, that doesn't change how they feel about themselves.

• 42:27Speaker 02

  It's so true.

• 42:27Speaker 01

  You know what I mean? Like, that doesn't change a thing. And, I don't know. And like, ugh, like, not to, I, I don't know. Like, I, it's, I honestly, I'm gonna take the thing of like, maybe you just like let her be pick me because obviously she has some deeper demons going on and like, that's, it's obviously like not the men she's like primarily insecure about. She's probably just using it as a scapegoat for like other situations.

• 42:51Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 42:52Speaker 01

  And like, you respectfully can't project your insecurities onto her. I don't think that's fair.

• 42:57Speaker 02

  Yeah. Whoa, you just ate that up.

• 42:59Speaker 01

  I went on a date with a guy like four years ago and he was super hot. He was a little eager and was talking about wanting to go on a road trip together later that summer.

• 43:05Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 43:05Speaker 01

  Et cetera.

• 43:06Speaker 02

  Oh, fuck, sounds like me.

• 43:08Speaker 01

  But besides the date, but besides that, oh wait, it is you.

• 43:11Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 43:12Speaker 01

  But besides that, the date was fun and I had a good time. He was a great kisser. However, afterwards, he pretty much ghosted me.

• 43:16Speaker 02

  Oh, not me.

• 43:17Speaker 01

  So he love bombed you. He was moving cities a few weeks later, but it was still pretty abrupt. Anyway, fast forward to today and I just saw him on Bumble. Should I message him or leave it in the past? I'm so tempted. I would not message him.

• 43:28Speaker 02

  I feel like he's giving like love bombing, like bad vibes and it's like, you're probably better off without.

• 43:34Speaker 03

  Yeah, I know my ass would message him for sure.

• 43:37Speaker 01

  But it's interesting. You would message him?

• 43:39Speaker 03

  Of course I would.

• 43:41Speaker 02

  I also like probably wouldn't take my own advice. Like I'm telling you like

• 43:44Speaker 01

  I would message him.

• 43:45Speaker 02

  The universe is doing a greater thing for you.

• 43:47Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah. And shut up with that.

• 43:49Speaker 02

  And I'm messaging.

• 43:50Speaker 01

  Hi Jake. Hi Jake and whatever amazing guest.

• 43:54Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 43:55Speaker 01

  Guests.

• 43:57Speaker 02

  Amazing we are.

• 43:59Speaker 03

  When you miss, like when you don't land your jokes.

• 44:02Speaker 01

  I don't want to talk about it.

• 44:03Speaker 03

  It's horrible.

• 44:04Speaker 01

  I need to restart this. Hi Jake.

• 44:06Speaker 03

  It's just god awful.

• 44:07Speaker 01

  Hi Jake and amazing guests is, hi Jake and whatever amazing guest is accompanying you today. Longtime pussy, first time puss, sharing what's wrong. Recent college grad and recently back in the dating scene after a long hiatus. I met this guy so great and so kind and respectful.

• 44:21Speaker 03

  Was the hiatus?

• 44:22Speaker 01

  Which gave me the ick at first, but I'm learning to like what's good for me and I think I actually like this now, man now. He's only living where I am until the end of the month and then he travels for work for like five months.

• 44:31Speaker 03

  Oh, an expiration date.

• 44:33Speaker 01

  I was, I don't know if it makes sense to lock it down since we've been only going on dates for a month. What should I do?

• 44:39Speaker 03

  These are all targeted at me.

• 44:40Speaker 01

  Julia.

• 44:41Speaker 03

  Honestly, yeah.

• 44:42Speaker 01

  Julia had an expiration date with her first boyfriend. Um, but it would made a lot more, more or less sense than this because he's moving states and she was moving to West Hollywood.

• 44:54Speaker 02

  My biggest question is, was the dating hiatus like on your own accord?

• 44:58Speaker 03

  I'll tell you. Life is too short to not do things.

• 45:06Speaker 01

  Cause they scare you?

• 45:07Speaker 03

  Yes. Like, I just have this like whole philosophy with dating that like it doesn't need to be like so planned out and like so like every little thing needs to like fall into line like the way you want it to. Like. I just think that we're so young and I don't know how old you are, but like I just think that there's no

• 45:26Speaker 01

  Well, it seems like she's twenty-two or twenty-three because she's a recent college grad.

• 45:30Speaker 03

  Oh, right.

• 45:31Speaker 02

  Context clues.

• 45:32Speaker 03

  Thank you for that.

• 45:33Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 45:33Speaker 03

  I appreciate it. But like, I was saying this to um our friend's little sister the other day who was like kind of having like some troubles with this like boy and I was like, I just like you're too young. Like, yeah, this probably isn't your man, but like, life is about experiences. Life is about learning things. You learn a lot by the people you date. You learn a lot about yourself by the people you date. So like, so what if he isn't the world's most stand-up amazing guy? So what if he's moving? Like, let yourself experience things. No matter if the outcome might be painful, like, you don't need to protect yourself from everything. Like, sometimes you just need to dive into the

• 46:04Speaker 02

  Enjoy the journey.

• 46:05Speaker 01

  Also, then you can relate to sad music, which is what I've always wanted to relate to. The only song I'm relating now to is I Think He Knows and Delicate.

• 46:11Speaker 03

  Yeah, Delicate. I'm so good. What is it?

• 46:13Speaker 01

  Delicate, actually.

• 46:15Speaker 03

  Delicate is the greatest song of all time.

• 46:16Speaker 01

  Honest to God, like

• 46:17Speaker 03

  No one has ever encapsulated the feeling of of that ever besides her.

• 46:21Speaker 01

  Well, just the hurt

• 46:21Speaker 03

  Is it cool that I said all that?

• 46:23Speaker 01

  Like, oh my god. Is it cool that I said that?

• 46:27Speaker 03

  Are you thinking of me?

• 46:28Speaker 01

  But is it cool that like, that I'm thinking of you? Like, everything you say, like, I've never heard someone be like, everything I say, everything you say, you're like

• 46:35Speaker 03

  Fuck, I wish I felt that way about someone. Same. I want a crush. So bad.

• 46:38Speaker 01

  When you're on a date and you're with like, you guys are on a friend and you hold hands under the table, it feels like you're the only people in the room. It's like, I seriously like

• 46:46Speaker 03

  Yeah, I don't feel that way about anyone these days.

• 46:47Speaker 02

  I need a crush.

• 46:50Speaker 01

  Honestly, having a crush is the best feeling in the entire world.

• 46:52Speaker 02

  For the soul.

• 46:53Speaker 01

  It's the best feeling in the entire world. And when their name pops up on your phone, you're like, oh my god, I don't need to jump.

• 46:57Speaker 02

  If you don't have a crush, like, without a crush, I have no purpose.

• 47:01Speaker 03

  Ah, I wish I had a crush on someone.

• 47:03Speaker 01

  I think we should phone one of our guy friends for some guy advice.

• 47:06Speaker 02

  What guy friends?

• 47:07Speaker 01

  Matt.

• 47:09Speaker 04

  Peyton.

• 47:11Speaker 03

  Hi, it's Peyton.

• 47:13Speaker 04

  Hey Peyton, it's Matt.

• 47:14Speaker 03

  Hey, Matt.

• 47:15Speaker 01

  Where's Shia?

• 47:17Speaker 04

  He's not here. He's sleeping.

• 47:18Speaker 02

  Hi, Matt. It's Julia.

• 47:21Speaker 04

  Hey, Julia.

• 47:22Speaker 02

  Hey.

• 47:23Speaker 03

  Who is this?

• 47:23Speaker 04

  How's, how's New York life treating you guys?

• 47:26Speaker 03

  Well, we love it, but that's not why we called. We are actually filming therapy and we

• 47:31Speaker 04

  This is Matt, by the way.

• 47:33Speaker 02

  And we need some guy advice.

• 47:36Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 47:36Speaker 04

  What's wrong?

• 47:37Speaker 01

  Being single and a group of friends who are often in, who are all in relationships often means they're less likely to want to go to the bar. What do I do?

• 47:44Speaker 02

  Oh, fuck, this one's for P.

• 47:46Speaker 01

  What do you, what would you do, Matt?

• 47:47Speaker 02

  Read that to me one more time, because that's how hard this is for me.

• 47:50Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 47:51Speaker 02

  Being single and a group of friends who are in relationships often means they're less likely to want to go to the bar. What do I do? I don't know why we called Matt, because this is my own personal hell.

• 47:59Speaker 01

  Well, you know, I, you know.

• 48:00Speaker 02

  This is my worst fucking nightmare.

• 48:03Speaker 01

  I would say I would prescribe calling Matt.

• 48:07Speaker 02

  What's your answer, Matt? Because Matt would go to the bar with you.

• 48:10Speaker 04

  Uh, why not just like invite everybody out all at once, you know? Everybody can hang out together. You can still go to the bar.

• 48:16Speaker 02

  You want all the boyfriends at the bar?

• 48:20Speaker 04

  I don't, I mean, I guess. Why not? Uh, get my friend out of the house, you know?

• 48:25Speaker 01

  Matt, what are you doing today? Are you having a gorgeous day?

• 48:29Speaker 04

  Yeah, I'm having a really nice day, actually.

• 48:30Speaker 02

  Okay, bye.

• 48:31Speaker 01

  No, no, don't hang up.

• 48:34Speaker 04

  Alright, bye, guys.

• 48:34Speaker 01

  Why?

• 48:35Speaker 02

  Love you.

• 48:36Speaker 03

  Love you.

• 48:37Speaker 04

  Love you, bye.

• 48:39Speaker 02

  This is my worst nightmare, and I think if your friends aren't going to the bar with you, are they really your friends? I'm kidding. But like, I would hope if you guys were both in relationships, like, you would still want to come out with me.

• 48:50Speaker 01

  Of course. I would want to like PDA with my boyfriend all over the bar.

• 48:55Speaker 02

  Yes, like, bring your man to the bar.

• 48:57Speaker 01

  I am PDA.

• 48:58Speaker 02

  I hate PDA. You are PDA.

• 49:00Speaker 01

  Ew, why?

• 49:01Speaker 02

  Is it an attention thing?

• 49:02Speaker 01

  I think it must be an attention thing.

• 49:05Speaker 02

  Yeah. I hate PDA.

• 49:07Speaker 01

  Why didn't you guys tell me that?

• 49:08Speaker 02

  But maybe if it's the, with the right person, I would like PDA.

• 49:14Speaker 01

  Are you guys ready? We're actually gonna sing, okay? She got, she got, she got away.

• 49:22Speaker 03

  You sounded like SpongeBob.

• 49:24Speaker 01

  Okay. She, she got, she got away. Fuck.

• 49:31Speaker 03

  You can do way better than that.

• 49:32Speaker 01

  I know. She, she, she got, she got away.

• 49:37Speaker 03

  Okay, octave change.

• 49:39Speaker 01

  Yeah, that was good, right? Okay, Julia, your turn.

• 49:42Speaker 03

  No, I can't.

• 49:43Speaker 01

  You serious?

• 49:45Speaker 03

  I'm not gonna be able to do it.

• 49:46Speaker 01

  Where are the other TMWWs?

• 49:48Speaker 03

  Listen for the best. My reputation's never been worse. Stop.

• 49:58Speaker 03

  You're losing me.

• 50:02Speaker 03

  Stop.

• 50:02Speaker 01

  You gave me the damn card.

• 50:03Speaker 03

  Stop. It's BT's mom. BT has bumble going on. She's all I want and I've bumbled for so long. Stacy, can't you see? You're just not bumbling for me.

• 50:18Speaker 01

  Oh, Nolan, sometimes you just know which ones to pick. I just moved in with my best friend. Everyone's, everything's going great, except she still hasn't unpacked and it's been three weeks. Normally I would.

• 50:32Speaker 03

  Did you make this up?

• 50:33Speaker 01

  No. Normally I wouldn't care, but she's putting half her stuff in our living room. How do I bring this up without making it a fight?

• 50:41Speaker 03

  Who's on to us?

• 50:44Speaker 03

  We haven't unpacked yet. We've been here for over a month, so.

• 50:46Speaker 02

  Okay, so Julia and I literally have boxes in suitcases and plush throws all over the fucking living room.

• 50:57Speaker 03

  I don't know what you should do to your friend because we're the friend.

• 51:00Speaker 02

  We are the friends, but it's like, we're both in the same, we're both in the same.

• 51:05Speaker 03

  We do need to really accomplish it soon, though.

• 51:07Speaker 02

  I think that on Sunday, let's like, maybe like for three hours in the morning, like.

• 51:12Speaker 03

  But we need to finish.

• 51:13Speaker 02

  I know.

• 51:14Speaker 03

  It can't just be like we make it done. Like, we need to get rid of everything.

• 51:16Speaker 02

  I know. And we need to order a couch.

• 51:17Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 51:18Speaker 02

  We don't even have like living room furniture ordered.

• 51:22Speaker 01

  You got that nice table, though.

• 51:23Speaker 02

  Yeah, but it's like from, from, from my OG apartment.

• 51:28Speaker 01

  Oh. I found an extra key that my boyfriend's soon to be fiancee said without any shame or conviction was to his second apartment. Like, he said it was, like, he said it like.

• 51:36Speaker 03

  I mean, that's just.

• 51:38Speaker 01

  Like, he said it like it was normal. He got it during our relationship and uses it to, quote, "get space." He says he didn't lie because he just never told me. Oh, what the fuck? And he was going to eventually, but he doesn't think it's a big deal.

• 51:48Speaker 03

  Ah, girl.

• 51:49Speaker 01

  Like, I want to marry this man, but this is insane. Am I crazy? Run for the hills.

• 51:52Speaker 02

  I mean, use common fucking sense. That honestly, like, pisses me off.

• 51:57Speaker 03

  Pisses me off.

• 51:58Speaker 02

  Piss me off.

• 52:00Speaker 01

  Like.

• 52:00Speaker 02

  Like, seriously, it's like, I know that you know better than that.

• 52:03Speaker 03

  I hate the word fiancee.

• 52:06Speaker 01

  Why? Because, why? Because all of our friends just got engaged?

• 52:09Speaker 03

  No, I just don't like the word fiancee.

• 52:12Speaker 02

  Me and my fiancee.

• 52:14Speaker 01

  My future mother.

• 52:15Speaker 02

  Beyonce.

• 52:16Speaker 01

  Case.

• 52:18Speaker 02

  I'd rather, yeah, nevermind.

• 52:19Speaker 01

  My fut- you, do you know what Bay stands for?

• 52:22Speaker 02

  No.

• 52:23Speaker 01

  Before everything else, before anything else.

• 52:26Speaker 02

  I love that.

• 52:26Speaker 03

  Before anyone else.

• 52:27Speaker 02

  I feel like, I haven't had a boyfriend in so long, but why am I like so the vibe that I'd say Bay in like a real way?

• 52:33Speaker 01

  Yeah, you would.

• 52:33Speaker 03

  No, I'm just gonna bring my Bay.

• 52:35Speaker 02

  No, you guys like, can Bay come?

• 52:36Speaker 03

  Can Bay come? That's my Bay.

• 52:38Speaker 02

  I know we have plans tonight, but like any shot Bay can come? I have plans with Bay tonight, like any shot you can come.

• 52:44Speaker 01

  My future mother-in-law is pressuring my fiancee to do a choreographed dance at our wedding with her next year. Like a fun one, not a sweet one. I know he doesn't-

• 52:50Speaker 02

  Are you belly? Come on, enough with the dances.

• 52:53Speaker 01

  I know he doesn't want to do it, but she's, cough you, but she's paying for a big chunk of the wedding. Hope, this is so embarrassing. Well, if she's paying for the big chunk of the wedding.

• 53:01Speaker 03

  I prescribed that episode where they're all dancing. It's so much prettier.

• 53:04Speaker 02

  What's that, um, Netflix show? The Perfect Couple, where they have like the-

• 53:09Speaker 01

  Choreographed dance, yeah.

• 53:10Speaker 02

  Honestly, if it's something like that, then like that kind of hits. If not, it's giving like Sweet Sixteen.

• 53:16Speaker 01

  Okay. My wife has a horrible home decor taste. It's all for, it's all from-

• 53:22Speaker 03

  Sounds like Peyton with our fucking confetti bath mat.

• 53:25Speaker 02

  Yeah, I have zero like taste in design.

• 53:27Speaker 01

  Remy and Sheen, and makes me want to throw up and die.

• 53:31Speaker 03

  Plus she has a Timu addiction.

• 53:33Speaker 01

  Plus she has a Timu addiction. How do I survive-

• 53:36Speaker 03

  Holy fuck, how do I get a Timu addiction?

• 53:38Speaker 01

  How do I survive in these conditions? We've been married for a year and a half.

• 53:42Speaker 02

  Oh, so you're already married. That's a big problem. Timu, Timu?

• 53:46Speaker 01

  What is Timu?

• 53:47Speaker 03

  You know, remember the first Super Bowl ad?

• 53:48Speaker 02

  You can get a fridge for like three dollars.

• 53:49Speaker 01

  That was Tubi, Julia.

• 53:51Speaker 03

  No, that was Timu.

• 53:53Speaker 02

  You can literally get a fridge for three dollars.

• 53:55Speaker 01

  What?

• 53:56Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 53:56Speaker 02

  Everything's like crazy.

• 53:57Speaker 03

  It's like fifty cents. Everything on Timu.

• 54:00Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 54:01Speaker 03

  Like Peyton's dad, every time she'll like be like, I want to buy this, can you buy it? For me, he sends her the Timu version.

• 54:06Speaker 02

  And he's like, you mean this? I'm like, no.

• 54:09Speaker 01

  I might need to re-potty train myself. I've peed my pants for too many times to

• 54:12Speaker 03

  I used to pee my pants all the time, every time I laugh.

• 54:15Speaker 01

  You did, yes, you did. I've peed my pants for too many times for an adult. I peed my pants too many times for an adult. I'll have to train at work.

• 54:22Speaker 03

  You're having trouble today.

• 54:22Speaker 01

  I know. I seriously have to limit and monitor how much I drink. Is this a real thing or should I just diaper it up? No, Julia, I

• 54:27Speaker 03

  Definitely don't diaper it up.

• 54:29Speaker 01

  And I'm not even just saying this. I think you might have bladder OCD. I'm being dead ass fucking serious. Me and Julia both have it. Like, I cannot fall asleep.

• 54:35Speaker 03

  I pee seventeen times before I go to bed.

• 54:37Speaker 01

  And every time I feel myself drifting off, I think, oh my god, I'm gonna have to pee and I won't be able to fall asleep until I pee.

• 54:43Speaker 03

  Me too.

• 54:44Speaker 01

  I always have to pee. I pee right now.

• 54:46Speaker 03

  Damn, we're nutcases.

• 54:46Speaker 01

  Yeah, I have to pee literally right now. Is that why you had the worst insomnia that you did?

• 54:50Speaker 03

  No, Julia will pee.

• 54:52Speaker 02

  You were telling a story about me and it really, like, finally sunk in that I am insane.

• 54:57Speaker 01

  Oh, your insomnia, Julia? We've told about your insomnia.

• 55:00Speaker 03

  No, but it finally sunk in. Like, you were telling this story and I was like, oh yeah, I have problems, for sure.

• 55:04Speaker 02

  Julia will pee before she goes to bed, like, actually sixteen times. Every three minutes, she'll get up and go pee and it's actually outrageous. Like, how, does it, anything even come out?

• 55:18Speaker 03

  Every time.

• 55:19Speaker 01

  Sometimes nothing comes out. And that's the best feeling, because you're like, alright, I'm, I'm done.

• 55:22Speaker 03

  Wait, that's the worst feeling, because then I'm like, do I have a UTI?

• 55:27Speaker 01

  Okay, so what did we learn today?

• 55:28Speaker 03

  That I missed you.

• 55:29Speaker 01

  I missed you too. I missed you guys too. And we're gonna have a really fun weekend.

• 55:33Speaker 02

  We learned that, um, you need to come more often and like,

• 55:36Speaker 01

  Well, I'm going to.

• 55:37Speaker 02

  Maybe see a real estate agent.

• 55:38Speaker 01

  Okay, well, I learned that

• 55:41Speaker 02

  You missed us?

• 55:41Speaker 01

  I missed you guys and I'm having a, yes, and I'm having a great time in New York.

• 55:45Speaker 03

  Say it like you mean it.

• 55:45Speaker 01

  I learned that I really missed you guys, but I already knew that I missed you guys and I'm having a great time in New York.

• 55:49Speaker 03

  When did you know that you missed us?

• 55:50Speaker 01

  The day you left.

• 55:51Speaker 03

  Uh huh.

• 55:52Speaker 01

  And, uh,

• 55:53Speaker 02

  We saw Jake cry for the first time, ever.

• 55:55Speaker 01

  Yeah, that was the saddest day of my life.

• 55:56Speaker 03

  One time when he and Jake got in our big blow up fight, he almost, he like really tried to cry.

• 55:59Speaker 01

  I think cried. And Brett started laughing in my face.

• 56:03Speaker 02

  Jake, literally,

• 56:04Speaker 03

  Get the fuck out of here.

• 56:05Speaker 02

  In our seven years of friendship, never seen him cry, I've never even seen him like almost cry and he, oh, I'm kind of shocked we didn't tell the story, like our final leaving in LA.

• 56:15Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 56:15Speaker 02

  Okay, we are meaning to wrap up this episode, but we

• 56:19Speaker 01

  We had a final night out on Saturday night.

• 56:21Speaker 02

  We were getting ready for a party and Cassidy was over and Cassidy was in Jake's room and texted us saying, By the way, I just walked into Jake's room and he's bawling. And we were like, you're lying.

• 56:31Speaker 03

  I can't do this.

• 56:32Speaker 02

  Oh, my gut reaction was, I said, oh, you're lying, haha.

• 56:36Speaker 01

  Well, because Alice came into my room and

• 56:40Speaker 03

  Oh, this is really sad.

• 56:41Speaker 01

  And she was, I was like, oh, I'm gonna be so depressed tomorrow because they were supposed to leave Sunday. Oh, I would like to touch on one more thing before we leave. No one came to their going away party.

• 56:50Speaker 02

  Oh, my God, how did we not talk about this?

• 56:54Speaker 01

  Nobody came.

• 56:55Speaker 02

  Okay, quickly, we Saturday went to the pregame, we had a pregame at our house.

• 57:01Speaker 03

  Done with this episode.

• 57:02Speaker 02

  Jake is bawling crying.

• 57:04Speaker 03

  Ken, stop talking, we're, it's done.

• 57:06Speaker 01

  What? You agreed that-

• 57:07Speaker 03

  The episode's over now.

• 57:08Speaker 01

  You agreed that nobody came.

• 57:09Speaker 03

  We admitted it and it's done, so.

• 57:12Speaker 02

  I honestly will say, I don't give a fuck that no one showed up because I had enough fun for the capacity of the party.

• 57:18Speaker 01

  So four people?

• 57:20Speaker 02

  No, no, no, like, I mean, like, the people that were supposed to be there, like, I had, like,

• 57:23Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 57:24Speaker 02

  Two hundred times.

• 57:25Speaker 01

  Alice came into my room and she said, I was like, I'm not gonna leave tomorrow, I'm so sad. And she was like, oh my God, no, you're gonna need to get out of the house because everything's gonna remind you of them. And then I was like, uh, what? And then the subway, I chappelled around, started playing, when she left and I started crying alone in my room. Because I was so sad.

• 57:40Speaker 03

  Well, does everything remind you of us? Like, not really, huh?

• 57:43Speaker 02

  Because you guys redid the whole house.

• 57:46Speaker 01

  We needed to.

• 57:47Speaker 02

  Yeah, no, I get it.

• 57:49Speaker 03

  Thank God you did, that house was despicable.

• 57:50Speaker 01

  Yeah, the couch really reminds me of you guys.

• 57:52Speaker 03

  That's nice.

• 57:53Speaker 02

  Yeah, it was a hand-me-down.

• 57:54Speaker 01

  Um, okay, so what did we learn today? We learned that we miss each other a lot.

• 57:57Speaker 02

  So much.

• 57:59Speaker 03

  That we love when you're here, that dating is, is

• 58:03Speaker 01

  Exciting.

• 58:04Speaker 03

  Is great, um, oh, that the McCray concert was just

• 58:08Speaker 02

  Electric.

• 58:09Speaker 03

  Simply.

• 58:09Speaker 02

  We knew it would be.

• 58:10Speaker 01

  We knew it would be. She just levels up every other time.

• 58:13Speaker 02

  Her at the VMAs.

• 58:14Speaker 03

  The entire time, I was in a trance.

• 58:15Speaker 01

  She just levels up every time.

• 58:16Speaker 02

  Her at the VMAs, like, I was in full body chills.

• 58:19Speaker 01

  But she does it and then she acts so nonchalant about it, like, it's the craze, she's like, oh, yeah, that was fun. I'm like, um, if I ever did that, I wouldn't shut the fuck up about it ever.

• 58:26Speaker 02

  It's like, you just shook the country.

• 58:27Speaker 01

  She's so humble about it, it's, I like, genuinely humble too, so it's like, honestly, awesome to see.

• 58:34Speaker 02

  The entire concert, we just kept looking at each other going goosebumps.

• 58:37Speaker 01

  Oh, every time. What was your favorite part of the show?

• 58:40Speaker 03

  When she's saying nostalgia, honestly.

• 58:42Speaker 01

  Oh, you loved that. My favorite part was when she did.

• 58:44Speaker 03

  No, my favorite part always is guilty conscience.

• 58:47Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah, that's your favorite.

• 58:48Speaker 01

  Can I be honest? When they said, "I want your two hands." And then the spotlight went straight on her. And also, my favorite part was when they did "It's okay, I'm okay." And they strut down the runway. Do you remember?

• 58:59Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah, and they almost do this part. And then they walk to the front and they really do it for real.

• 59:03Speaker 02

  Mine is when they like, someone falls to the floor. And then "Blood on my hands" starts.

• 59:09Speaker 03

  I know my favorite. I know my favorite. Say you wanna know me.

• 59:11Speaker 01

  You don't wanna know me.

• 59:13Speaker 03

  You just wanna do what I do. Yeah, that.

• 59:15Speaker 02

  And also, just keep watching. When it was going all around.

• 59:20Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah.

• 59:20Speaker 02

  And the lights were flaring. I seriously thought that was gonna drop to the floor.

• 59:25Speaker 01

  Yeah, if you have any time.

• 59:27Speaker 02

  That's our takeaway.

• 59:29Speaker 01

  Go see Tate McRae's Miss Possessive World Tour. It will rock your world and change your life.

• 59:34Speaker 02

  Fucking incredible.

• 59:36Speaker 01

  It will make you wanna get off the couch and move your body.

• 59:39Speaker 02

  It'll inspire you to pick up some type of hobby. I'll tell you that much.

• 59:41Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 59:42Speaker 02

  Because wow.

• 59:42Speaker 01

  Cause wow. What a gift.

• 59:45Speaker 02

  Okay, and that's that.

• 59:47Speaker 01

  And that's that.

• 59:47Speaker 02

  Goodbye.

• 59:48Speaker 01

  All right, say bye pussies.

• 59:49Speaker 02

  Bye pussies.

• 59:50Speaker 01

  Bye pussies.

• 59:51Speaker 02

  Love you.