Pod Insights The Rewatchables ‘Pacific Heights’ With Bill Simmons, Chris Ryan, and Kyle Brandt About this episode From Hell month continues with a visit to San Francisco, where Carter Hayes is wreaking havoc on a Victorian home in ‘Pacific Heights’ starring Melanie Griffith, Matthew Modine, and Michael Keaton.
Producers: Craig Horlbeck, Chia Hao Tat, Eduardo Ocampo, and Matt Pevic
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Transcript 23,352 words · 8 speakers
Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.
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1:06 Bill Simmons? The Rewatchables is brought to by The Ringer Podcast Network, where you can find Chris Ryan, the one and only.
1:12 Chris Ryan? That's me.
1:13 Bill Simmons? The watch World Cup. Lot of World Cup going on right now.
1:15 Chris Ryan? For sure.
1:16 Bill Simmons? I don't know when this is running, but the World Cup will still be going.
1:18 Chris Ryan? OK, then I am still doing The Adam Friedland Show: The Beautiful Pod, where we talk about the World Cup.
1:23 Bill Simmons? Talk about soccer.
1:24 Chris Ryan? Uh huh.
1:25 Bill Simmons? Yeah. Hopefully, by the time people hear this, USA will still be alive.
1:29 Chris Ryan? Let's hope.
1:30 Bill Simmons? We'll be like, holy shit!
1:31 Chris Ryan? We got through the groups.
1:33 Bill Simmons? Kyle Brandt's here.
1:34 Speaker 03 Hey, Bill.
1:36 Bill Simmons? You said you have an announcement. What do you got?
1:37 Speaker 03 I do. I have an announcement that affects us all. I was listening to the Mailbag episode of this very podcast.
1:43 Bill Simmons? Oh, my God.
1:44 Speaker 03 And there was a gentleman who had a grievance with you and me, Bill. And then, in the wake of that grievance, Chris Ryan had a solution to the grievance. And we even have the clip. If you wouldn't mind, Craig Horbach, play the clip to remind the listeners.
1:56 Bill Simmons? How do you and Kyle Brandt sleep at night, knowing you failed to choose the Storm family portrait as the piece of memorabilia you'd keep from Heart to Kill in 1990? It's seen early in the movie, right before Felicia Storm is brutally murdered during Foreplay with Mason and before their son Sonny escapes. See attached. As penance, please do an episode on Deadly Ground. So he sent a picture.
2:20 Bill Simmons? And this is the Storm family photo? I didn't notice it. I apologize. I know Kyle apologizes as well. This is amazing. I can't believe they did this.
2:29 Chris Ryan? I'll tell you what you guys should do.
2:30 Bill Simmons? By the way, that's Sharon Stone, I think.
2:32 Chris Ryan? To make up for this, you should get those made into t-shirts and wear them the next time you and Kyle record.
2:37 Bill Simmons? I feel like Kyle is crazy enough and there's no football right now that he's gonna show up on our rewatchables with the Storm family portrait on there.
2:45 Speaker 03 We appreciate the feedback. We listen. We're always trying to pay attention. Anytime I can make the show better, and ladies and gentlemen, I'm thrilled to tell you, we got him. We got him. We got him. We got Felicia, rest in peace. We got the unironically named Sunny Storm, and we got Mason Storm, who is mean mugging the artist who is painting a family portrait.
3:09 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
3:09 Speaker 03 You just love to see it. And guys, I got him coming your way too. I'm so thrilled that I have this.
3:15 Chris Ryan? It's also Mason Storm watching himself commit to foreplay with his wife, you know? Like, it's a stunning meta textual commentary on family and sexuality in it, and now you have it as a t-shirt.
3:27 Bill Simmons? It's a t-shirt Storm.
3:28 Speaker 03 This is a six-person pod. Here it is, guys. So they're gonna be joining us for Pacific Heights, Mason Storm to talk real estate.
3:36 Speaker 03 We got it.
3:36 Bill Simmons? So is that supposed to be Sharon Stone?
3:39 Speaker 03 No, it's Felicia Storm. I don't think it's Sharon Stone.
3:42 Bill Simmons? Oh, yeah, yeah. She was in the other one.
3:43 Speaker 03 I think it's just this great-looking wife who got shotgun to death in the first act.
3:48 Bill Simmons? Unbelievable stuff, Kyle.
3:49 Speaker 03 Thank you.
3:50 Bill Simmons? It's gonna be hard for me to concentrate on the podcast.
3:53 Speaker 03 I know.
3:53 Bill Simmons? And yet.
3:54 Speaker 03 Imagine.
3:55 Bill Simmons? And yet, Pacific Heights is coming up next.
3:59 Bill Simmons? It's the rewatchables presented by FanDuel predicts. You can predict the summer soccer showcase, hmm, with FanDuel predicts. From the opening game to the final whistle, stay locked in. Sign up now for your $25 bonus on FanDuel predicts. Go to FanDuel.com/predicts to sign up. Offered by FanDuel Prediction Markets, LLC, a registered futures commission merchant. 18+, restrictions apply. See terms at FanDuel.com/predicts/bonus-offer/terms.
4:45 Bill Simmons? All right, guys. I don't know if it's from Hell Month or from Hell Summer. We'll see. This might run in July, CR, for all we know. The USA might be in the final four by the time this runs.
4:52 Chris Ryan? It could happen.
4:54 Bill Simmons? But I told Kyle Brandt the premise. I told him some of the movies. And he basically looked at me and he said,
5:02 Bill Simmons? "When Pacific Heights is ready,
5:03 Chris Ryan? Yes.
5:04 Bill Simmons? I'm there." Why? What is it about this movie?
5:07 Speaker 03 Well, Bill, I don't know whether you realize this or not. You referenced this movie over the years on this pod here and there. Just connected to Keaton, connected to this, that. It'll come up. And every time you do them, I was like, "Oh, it'd be great to do a Pacific Heights pod." And then recently, you were listing the movies for Hell Month. And the second you said Pacific Heights, CR goes, "Ooh, that's the one I want to do." Because, of course, he's a man of taste. And I think for me, it's just the rare, rare Zillow thriller. You don't see a lot in that genre. And I remember it making a big impression on me as a kid, despite having no knowledge of real estate law or renters' rights. And I think it's because it was fully evil Michael Keaton. Immediately in the wake of Batman, he decides to do Dark Money Pit.
5:52 Speaker 03 And I just remember thinking that was so cool. And I loved this movie. And I don't know how big the audience is, but every time it hits for me, and the rewatch was great.
6:00 Chris Ryan? This is a crazy one that was on cable constantly. When I turned this on to rewatch it, I was like, "I kind of don't need to do this. I have this movie committed to memory." I remember so many nuances of Keaton's performance specifically.
6:12 Bill Simmons? Yeah.
6:12 Chris Ryan? Who's kind of in this movie like Hannibal Lecter.
6:15 Bill Simmons? Were you gonna play with a razor blade during this pod? Or no? Just kind of move it around ominously?
6:20 Chris Ryan? I let some roaches out in the house. You know, but, uh, you know, this one has been kind of lost to history a little bit. I don't even know. It goes in and out of streaming services. It's not constantly on. I don't think it's had any kind of like critical reevaluation, but it is a rollicking, you know, what is it, 100-minute-long thrill ride.
6:40 Bill Simmons? Tenet from Hell. New York Times described it as an eviction thriller.
6:44 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
6:45 Bill Simmons? Which I think might be the only one of its kind. I saw this in the theater. It's a great date movie. It's both scary and not scary at all. I watched it with my wife this weekend. She loved it. It's incredibly fun to make fun of Drake Goodman, played by Matthew Modine, who we'll get into with a lot of thoughts. But some stuff I like.
7:07 Bill Simmons? Tremendous San Francisco movie. We talked about this during the Basic Instinct pod. This like early 90s San Francisco. Great job. See Alcatraz at one point.
7:17 Chris Ryan? It's Poderos Hill, is that what it is?
7:19 Bill Simmons? Yeah.
7:19 Chris Ryan? Is it Poderos or Patero?
7:21 Bill Simmons? It's. Patero Hill.
7:23 Chris Ryan? Patero, my god.
7:24 Bill Simmons? The corner of 19th and Texas, so it's not in Pacific Heights. But, great San Francisco movie. It's right, right as this From Hell thing is taking off. We talked about the peaks 92, but Fatal Attraction lays the tea leaves or something like this. And then, as Kyle pointed out. Kind of a tremendous, I learned something movie?
7:48 Bill Simmons? I didn't know anything about tenant rights, evictions, what the laws were. What I could get away with when I was a tenant someday. Once you're in, you're in, man. This is like the mainest of the movie. Did they take money from you, deposit? Nope, well, you're still in, you're good. Knock yourself out.
8:06 Chris Ryan? I think California has more lenient tenant rights than other states, but I did, later in my life, like when I was in my late teens, early twenties, I lived in a house in Boston where the landlord died and we just stopped paying rent.
8:21 Bill Simmons? Wow.
8:21 Chris Ryan? For like a full year and then the widow was like, what's up with you guys? Like you haven't paid rent in a year. And we were like, well, nobody asked, you know? And but it was like, there was, there was a whole process where it was like, it was gonna be impossible to get us out.
8:34 Speaker 03 And that widow was bankrupted because these brat kids didn't pay her dead husband's rent. Jesus, you are, just, just skating, no big deal. That's like better than illegal cable. That's incredible.
8:45 Bill Simmons? Really is.
8:46 Chris Ryan? Free rent.
8:46 Speaker 03 To that point though, like, when I watched it now as an adult, what freaks me out is, like, I'm not afraid of Freddy Krueger. I'm not afraid of going in a dark basement. I'm terrified of systems that I can't navigate and that the teeth of bureaucracy sink in, whether it's HOA, IRS, whatever it is, getting its teeth into me and I can't protect my family, especially since. In this movie, the couple, they throw it all in on this house. Like the great American dream. This is our future. It's an investment and it's being taken from them. Really relatable and very, very scary in a way that like a slasher movie is not.
9:24 Bill Simmons? And also, there's very few movies that shape your perspective completely. You could be on the Carter Hayes side or you could be on the Modine and Melanie Griffith side.
9:33 Chris Ryan? Are there people who are on the Carter Hayes side?
9:35 Bill Simmons? Well, just like, I don't have enough money to pull off renting this place, but I'm in and I'm just gonna fuck it. Like, that's like the worst case scenario, right? This is like a pretty evil guy. But there's been, I remember like, we, when I lived in Charlestown, we had a really, really huge party and got in trouble with the landlord. And I did kind of be like, you know what? What's he gonna do?
9:58 Bill Simmons? I got six months left at least out there from Pacific Heights. Like, there's a whole process here. We worked it out with the landlord, but, you know, you, you kind of put the chest out. It's like, you think you're better than me? We can't have a party?
10:13 Speaker 03 And what, what's nuts is that, is that moment when after, after Carter Hayes gets beat up and the cop comes and the cop holds like a legal class right there on the sidewalk and where, where Drake is like, he's got no right to be here. And the cop's like, when he's in, he's got rights. And he's just schooling Modine's, get a lawyer, kid. That's the crux of the movie. And by the way, Modine, when we get to the, the overacting award, like Modine goes five different times.
10:42 Chris Ryan? Well, and considering the fact that he's going up against Keaton here, who's just like, throwing a hundred and three. He's Mizrau Ski at the end of this game. Yeah, like it's.
10:51 Bill Simmons? Oh, a Mizrau Ski reference.
10:52 Chris Ryan? I watched, I saw him live on Friday night.
10:54 Bill Simmons? 15Ks, you went to that game?
10:55 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
10:55 Bill Simmons? 15Ks, one hitter?
10:57 Chris Ryan? It was amazing.
10:57 Bill Simmons? Oh my God.
10:58 Speaker 03 Oh, that's great.
10:59 Bill Simmons? Kyle, when you, what happened after you left the Real World Chicago? Did you have a place to go or did you have to move back home?
11:07 Speaker 03 No, I almost immediately moved to Franklin Avenue at the base of Runyon Canyon, like by the Magic Hotel, like right there. I got an apartment on the Casanova and La Brea.
11:15 Bill Simmons? Oh, yeah, I like that.
11:16 Speaker 03 Yeah, so I got my first apartment, had a roommate. It was $1,400 a month. I paid 700 a month and I lived there for like a couple of years.
11:23 Bill Simmons? You, cause you could have done the Carter Hayes on the Real World.
11:25 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
11:26 Bill Simmons? It'd be like, all right, it's move out day. It's like, is it?
11:30 Bill Simmons? I don't know. I'm here now, my stuff's here, is it move out day?
11:33 Speaker 03 Me and Anissa are just gonna stay for a while. We've been here for four months and we're gonna get Tanya to stay too. And we're just gonna keep finding out what happens. We stopped being polite. Great idea, Bill.
11:42 Chris Ryan? I was kinda thinking that, you know, there was that story going around about Carl Anthony Towns when he got traded from the Timberwolves was like, "They gave me 10 minutes to pack up like nine years of stuff here." And I was like, there would be a whole new Pacific Heights twist of people moving into athletes' houses after they just got traded and being like, "I'm not leaving." But you're like, you know, Cat's, Cat's squatter.
12:05 Bill Simmons? Sure. Yeah, what if Cat just never left Minnesota?
12:08 Chris Ryan? That's right.
12:09 Bill Simmons? It's like, nah.
12:11 Chris Ryan? I'm good. Yeah, does Jimmy Dohlin say like?
12:13 Bill Simmons? I know the trade legally happened. Craig, do you have a terrible tenant story?
12:17 Speaker 04 When I lived in Brooklyn a year after college, we had a true slumlord. Like, our place was a complete piece of shit and we eventually stopped paying rent and realized there's nothing this guy can do. So we didn't pay rent for probably the last three months.
12:29 Chris Ryan? Did he do anything to harass you back?
12:31 Speaker 04 He, he threatened us and we said like, "We'll get a lawyer" and he never responded. We never saw the guy in person. We went to his office. It was always closed every time we came by, so we just stopped paying.
12:42 Bill Simmons? This is what happens.
12:43 Speaker 04 But that's New York. I think in like Florida and Texas, it's a lot harder for the tenant.
12:47 Bill Simmons? The other weird thing about this movie is I think it's a one on one. Cause you think like there's been 75, we did Hand in the Rocks of Cradle. There's been 75 versions of that movie with the nanny comes in, "Oh, she's gonna try to rope in the dad and..." With all the, the mistress from hell, that's a, that's, I don't remember another tenant or eviction from hell, right?
13:08 Chris Ryan? Well, this could be, I mean, so, it would be so fun to remake this for Airbnb now.
13:12 Speaker 03 Yes.
13:13 Chris Ryan? You know, and to be like, "Oh yeah," you know, cause like they've made some Airbnb horror movies like the, um, I think it was The Rental from a couple of years ago with Dave Franco.
13:23 Bill Simmons? Oh, I kinda like that movie.
13:24 Chris Ryan? Me too. And he directed that. But they haven't made a, "I Airbnb'd my, my house during the World Cup and now the guy won't leave." Like, that's, that's sitting right there.
13:34 Bill Simmons? And he's with seven people from Scotland.
13:37 Chris Ryan? And they keep singing about John McGinn.
13:39 Bill Simmons? They just keep singing songs and pouring beer on each other. This was another thing I loved about this movie that for some reason makes me think of Kyle Brandt. Every time I see this, opening credits from the eighties or nineties. It starts out, James G. Robinson presents.
13:55 Speaker 03 Sure.
13:55 Bill Simmons? I don't know who that is, but it just sounded, there's a certain weight and I just was disappointed that Mustafa Akka couldn't have been involved.
14:03 Chris Ryan? This is one of the, I think one of the last Morgan Creek movies. I'm, I can't remember. Yeah. And then Joe Roth was a part of this. This was, had a lot of hitters. And it's worth saying, it's Keaton's first movie after Batman.
14:15 Bill Simmons? Yeah, let's do some Keaton.
14:16 Speaker 03 Fucking awesome.
14:17 Bill Simmons? First movie after Batman. We talked about him in the past. I loved him in the eighties from, uh, from the Letterman appearances. Then Night Shift, which we did with Billy Blaze, Johnny Dangerously Gung Ho, Beetlejuice. He's a top five Letterman guest. There's a couple misses in there. A little clean and sober in there.
14:36 Bill Simmons? But then Batman in eighty nine. And it was like watching like one of your college buddies just become one of the biggest stars in the world. It's like, really? Michael Keaton's gonna be Batman?
14:44 Chris Ryan? Yeah. He's like the closest thing we would have today would be Pratt, right? Like, kind of. But Pratt doesn't have like a, I saw him on Letterman a hundred thousand times. Like it was more.
14:54 Bill Simmons? It'd be like if Peter Schrager became Batman.
14:57 Speaker 03 By the way, Peter Schrager might be Batman. He's in New York. He's right there. He's tough. He's tall.
15:02 Chris Ryan? Bill, I'm hearing a lot of things from the guys in Gotham. They're very excited about R V Dead's chances as Attorney General.
15:08 Speaker 03 Hey, I talked to the Penguin, Bill. His guys love him. They are ready to go to war for him for Gotham.
15:14 Chris Ryan? And you know what? The cold weather is not a problem for the Penguin, we're hearing.
15:19 Bill Simmons? And I'll tell you another thing. If the Penguin hadn't gone right there, Sean McVay was ready to take him.
15:24 Speaker 03 I'm glad you bring up McVay. I haven't mentioned him in thirty seconds. Did you know I'm friends with him? I was at his wedding. He's basically the Riddler in disguise. Peter, you're great. We love you. I know you listen.
15:34 Bill Simmons? Anyway. Batman makes Keaton a massive, massive star. It goes from a, wait, why the fuck is this guy Batman too? He was actually a great Batman because of the mouth.
15:43 Chris Ryan? Yes.
15:44 Bill Simmons? The mouth with the mask looked great. He did the job. He pulled it off. What's your next move? It's gonna be an eviction thriller, actually, with Matthew Modine and Melinda Griffin.
15:52 Chris Ryan? So I couldn't find this in the research.
15:54 Bill Simmons? Yeah.
15:55 Chris Ryan? Do you guys, because there's a phenomenon of like, this has happened to Jennifer Lawrence when she was in Hunger Games. And then the first thing that comes out is a horror movie that she had shot like three years previous. And they're like, from the star of The Hunger Games.
16:06 Bill Simmons? Yeah.
16:07 Chris Ryan? I bet she would have paid anything to have that flushed down the toilet. Was Pacific Heights something that he agreed to previously?
16:13 Bill Simmons? No, it was a move.
16:14 Chris Ryan? I'm pivoting.
16:15 Bill Simmons? Career man, career move of, I wanna be a little bit evil. But the thing is, like, actors love going evil. This is the best part of the movie. You don't want the Modine part of this movie. You want, you want the Keaton part, right?
16:26 Speaker 03 The, well, Chris, the thing is, the same thing happened. Chris Hemsworth in a terrible Red Dawn remake came out after he was Thor.
16:33 Chris Ryan? Right.
16:33 Speaker 03 And they brought that out. But listen, I have a take.
16:36 Bill Simmons? Happens in porn too, a lot, a lot of times in porn. Like, I didn't realize that that.
16:40 Speaker 03 Wow, look at this person, going at it. Carter Hayes is Bruce Wayne if he had never gotten the money. And I think it's like, Thomas and Martha get killed and he turns to crime. All the money goes to charity. He's cunning, he's dashing, he's brilliant, he likes the blonde women. Let's be honest, there is like a very cheeky moment with that black Porsche where he clicks the thing. And it's like, that's the fucking Batmobile.
17:04 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
17:04 Speaker 03 Like, in the driveway, that is exactly it. He drives that fancy Mercedes at the end. That's like the Wayne family car. If Bruce Wayne had never gotten the money, he's Carter Hayes.
17:13 Chris Ryan? When he's trying to take on that rich widow at the end, he's rolling around, he's got the V-neck sweater on. He definitely looks like Bruce Wayne at the golf club.
17:22 Bill Simmons? I, I've said this in previous pods and it sounds nuts, but Hanks and Keaton. Were deadlocked for years and years. They were Mahomes and Josh Allen, basically. And, and Keaton was winning in 1990. Batman was bigger than anything Hanks did. They were dead even, probably going for the same parts where you could have flipped them in different movies. And by the time we get to Pacific Heights, this movie was a hit. And Hanks has Bonfire of the Vanities, basically the same year. That's a bomb.
17:51 Chris Ryan? Yes, as does Melanie Griffith.
17:53 Bill Simmons? And then the next year it flips and Hanks goes on his Hanks run. I, I think the thing I loved about Keaton is I like him more when he's like this guy or Jackie Brown. Cause he could also be the night shift guy, but you can't be the night shift guy for 20 years, right? Night shift guy is like a five year shelf life. I liked when there's like a little darkness to Keaton.
18:13 Chris Ryan? Yeah, and I think being part of an ensemble or being part of a larger cast, rather than being like the only person, it's helpful for him. Like The Paper, he's pretty good in. I know that you don't like that movie, but yeah.
18:23 Bill Simmons? Spotlight.
18:24 Chris Ryan? Yeah, and Spotlight is a good example.
18:26 Bill Simmons? You know what happened in Spotlight? They do!
18:31 Bill Simmons? We cut these guys loose!
18:33 Speaker 03 I missed that.
18:36 Bill Simmons? Living your
18:36 Speaker 03 Don't you call me ladies!
18:37 Chris Ryan? You know what's underrated? I, I found this out this weekend because it came up on YouTube. An underrated accent in Spotlight is Tucci.
18:45 Bill Simmons? Yeah, what's he doing in that?
18:46 Chris Ryan? It's, it's like Boston, but I maybe went out of state for school.
18:50 Bill Simmons? Yeah.
18:51 Chris Ryan? And came back.
18:51 Bill Simmons? I went to Tennessee.
18:52 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
18:56 Bill Simmons? We're gonna go a lot into some of the interviews Matthew Modine has given over the years because he's really a one on one. And honestly, a threat to listen to this podcast and send some angry tweets.
19:05 Chris Ryan? I didn't want to say I love Matthew Modine.
19:07 Bill Simmons? I love Matthew Modine.
19:08 Chris Ryan? Congratulations on The Knicks and Fullmetal Jacket is one of my favorite movies.
19:12 Bill Simmons? Vision Quest, we love. We already did Vision Quest.
19:15 Speaker 04 And he's back Stranger Things. He had a huge run in Stranger Things.
19:18 Chris Ryan? Don't take it personally.
19:19 Bill Simmons? I'm in on Modine.
19:20 Chris Ryan? And also, this part, he does this part very well.
19:25 Bill Simmons? Right. Well, we're gonna get to that. Here's what he said about
19:26 Speaker 03 I'm gonna go the other way. I don't give a shit what Modine says. When he turns off those utilities and does that victory dance, cringe, cringe. Modine, you can tweet anything you want.
19:37 Bill Simmons? Wow, come right at me. Modine said about-
19:40 Chris Ryan? Kyle, I've been talking to Modine and he's so excited about some of the Stranger Things spit offs, yeah.
19:47 Bill Simmons? Modine said about Michael Keaton in one of the many interviews he's given over the years. Michael is a charming and witty man. So playing that character may have been uncomfortable for him. It was so against type. I'm not sure what he did while not on set. He had just done Batman. It was a ginormous success. So I'd see him on the set and we'd do our work and then he'd disappear like Bruce Wayne. Then Keaton was just in and out. Modine's like, hey, you want to watch the Knicks game tonight? No, no, I'm going to dinner. And that was it. Didn't feel like there was a lot of love in general on this set, but um-
20:17 Speaker 03 Yeah.
20:17 Bill Simmons? Keaton after this, it gets, gets a little rocky. Like he does Batman, the second one.
20:22 Chris Ryan? Uh huh.
20:23 Bill Simmons? With uh, Michelle Pfeiffer.
20:24 Chris Ryan? Yes.
20:25 Bill Simmons? And then, I don't know. It's, it's, it gets a little rocky for a couple of years IMDB wise and then hangs.
20:31 Speaker 03 Chris, do you like Batman Returns?
20:33 Chris Ryan? I think, I, I'm not the biggest Burton Batman guy. I think the first one's huge for me just because of like seeing it in theater and the event of it all, but I think it just kind of pales in comparison to the norm.
20:43 Speaker 03 Yeah, I don't care for it very much. I, I, I just don't, the Penguin thing and all that. I, I just don't think it's very good. And then the Schumacher ones came in and destroyed it.
20:50 Chris Ryan? Right.
20:51 Speaker 03 Batman Returns, I don't really like, to your point, Bill. Like, we're, we're talking Apex, Mountain Left and Right. Like this is like the definition of it for Keaton.
20:57 Bill Simmons? Yeah. Um, Melanie Griffith, this is kind of the tail end for her as a leading actress in a movie. We go from Body Double, Something Wild, Working Girl. And then she does Pacific Heights, Bonfire of the Vanities this year and then that's it.
21:11 Chris Ryan? She really paid for Bonfire of the Vanities in a way that-
21:14 Bill Simmons? Really, she was the one. Yeah, and Willis didn't either.
21:17 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
21:18 Bill Simmons? The Palma did though.
21:19 Chris Ryan? Yep.
21:20 Bill Simmons? This was uh, The Last Stanford and I gotta say she's miscast in this movie, but I still like that she's in the movie. That, it's a miscasting that I actually really enjoy. I don't think she's the right person for the movie and I never really bought her and Modine, but I think that's one of the reasons I liked the movie Kyle. Even last night, my wife and I were talking about it. We're like, would these two be together?
21:42 Chris Ryan? There's a lot of that. I was, so this is my favorite part about this movie. Sometimes we'll watch these films that are set in like the early 90s, up until like maybe turn of the century. And you're like, ah, I feel like all of this stuff would be so different now because of technology, but there's something perfect about a horse instructor, a horse riding instructor and a kite maker.
22:03 Bill Simmons? Yep.
22:04 Chris Ryan? You're like, eh, let's make it work. You want to throw a 750 down on a Victorian? You know, like, I, I don't know, like, how would people vet each other back then? How long did you date? You know, but like, they're just two kids, like the fuck, trying to make it honest, you know, like, it's just.
22:17 Bill Simmons? I had this for later, like, did he feel like the kites were gonna take off in the 90s?
22:21 Chris Ryan? Dude, I mean.
22:22 Bill Simmons? He's like, South Korea, it's going nuts right now.
22:24 Speaker 03 Listen, I have it on Unanswerable Questions. It's like, does he make fucking kites for a living?
22:29 Bill Simmons? He does. He's a luxury kite maker.
22:31 Speaker 03 Right now, it would be like some douchebag you went to high school with on Facebook and he's like, bit of personal news, new endeavor, starting a kite company, big things coming.
22:40 Chris Ryan? We're thinking IPO in spring of 28.
22:43 Speaker 03 Early investors, if anyone wants to get in on my kite company. So she, she's a horse instructor with a bad knee.
22:50 Chris Ryan? Equestrian rider.
22:51 Bill Simmons? Heard her name.
22:52 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
22:53 Bill Simmons? Equestrian accident, we didn't get to see for some reason, even though we got 10 minutes of backstory.
22:58 Chris Ryan? It's too bad Tatum's doctor couldn't work.
23:00 Speaker 03 Right.
23:01 Chris Ryan? It was on Patty.
23:02 Speaker 03 But maybe get an apartment. You're not, you're not even married. Like, the, the big swing for the Victorian, it's just, an apartment would be fine, right? Maybe you guys get the studio.
23:12 Bill Simmons? That's the other weird thing about the relationship is like they, they're filling out the application. It's like marital status. They look at each other like, single. And it's like they don't want to really get married, but somehow they went all in on this giant Victorian anyway.
23:24 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
23:25 Bill Simmons? And she says she's pregnant at one point and he doesn't even seem that excited?
23:29 Speaker 03 No.
23:30 Bill Simmons? He just says like, congratulations. Like she just got promoted at work. It's like, did your kid do fuckface? I have a lot of Drake Goodman thoughts, but yeah, Melanie Griffith. She's at that stage with this where I think she's probably late twenties real life. But in the movie, could be anywhere from 25 to 44. I would have believed any age, whereas Modine seems pretty young still. Like he's in Vision Quest five years earlier than after this.
23:56 Chris Ryan? Yes.
23:56 Speaker 03 Also, he goes shirtless a couple of times and Modine's still absolutely ripped. Like he looks absolutely great. He's in Vision Quest shape. Two things about their relationship. They kind of look like brother and sister. And if you know that and watch it, it weirds you out. I watched it once a few days ago and then I did some research, which you probably have, Bill, that like they weren't necessarily the best friends on set and I don't think it went that well. And then I watched the movie again and it really affects it knowing that they weren't liking each other.
24:21 Bill Simmons? Felt the same way. I watched it, did the research, watched it the second time and I'm like, oh yeah, they, they, even when she's like, when they're doing the renovation scene and she's kind of mounting him and it just felt like brother. It was like watching The Lannisters.
24:35 Chris Ryan? There was a lot more electricity when, when Keaton's got the nail gun to her head. A little bit more, more chemistry going on.
24:41 Bill Simmons? That's one of the questions of this movie. She has a more interesting relationship with Keaton, who she's in like two scenes with.
24:46 Chris Ryan? Yes.
24:47 Bill Simmons? But when she's in the scenes with them, I'm like, oh yeah.
24:49 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
24:50 Bill Simmons? Now we're going. I don't know, this, look, she's iconic in Body Double. She's great in Working Girl.
24:57 Speaker 03 Working Girl.
24:59 Bill Simmons? And had, you know, a bevy of personal problems. She married Don Johnson two different times. She married Antonio Banderas and she married Manny from Scarface.
25:07 Chris Ryan? It's kind of like us returning to Miami Vice the series after all these years.
25:11 Bill Simmons? Well, I feel, I feel like she's like a family member for us. Don Johnson, Stephen Bower and Antonio Banderas. It's her three husbands. I'm like, I don't know. I kind of dig her.
25:19 Chris Ryan? She should be third chair on the big pick.
25:24 Chris Ryan? It would just be like, yep, married him.
25:27 Bill Simmons? And then, uh, Modine. Playing Drake Goodman, who I'll just say this now, I think is the biggest dope in all of these From Hell movies. He might be the number one dumbass. Yeah, male or female, I think he's the dumbest. Every decision he makes is wrong.
25:44 Bill Simmons? He escalates it. At one point, my wife, who was half watching as always, just went on a tirade on him. Where it was like, it was almost like you forget you're watching a movie. She's like, why is this guy so fucking stupid? He overreacts to everything.
25:55 Chris Ryan? Yeah, but I think that's a great characteristic. Like, I think it's an amazing movie character to just be like, oh, this guy is bringing so much grief to himself because he can't control his temper.
26:05 Bill Simmons? Can you imagine if he was the rewatchables producer? The company's not on the screen yet. Where is he? I want him out!
26:15 Bill Simmons? What are your Jake Goodman thoughts, Kyle?
26:17 Speaker 03 I have a lot of Jake Goodman thoughts. Him, him being the dumbest thing in any of the From Hell movies is, is bold. There's a woman in The Good Son who drops her own son off a cliff in favor of one of her sons. That's a big move. But I, I love, um, there's a really brief scene, I know you guys saw it, where he shows us a lot of his cards. And he's a rugby player.
26:38 Chris Ryan? Yes.
26:38 Speaker 03 He comes in in the rain, he's got that like Blues Clues shirt on, and he's like, sorry, I went to double overtime. Super violent. Most rugby players will be ready to fight and have beers after the game. And really, really dumb. Like, my, my favorite part of the From Hell movies is not when the From Hell people go bad. It's when they're buttering up their marks. And the two scenes that Keaton has with, with Modine, and then it's a very different one with Patty. Modine just sees a few hundred bucks and he's like, I don't give a shit. Your private trust? Great. Total idiot. Whereas Melanie Griffith is actually really smart in this movie.
27:13 Bill Simmons? Yeah, she does, uh, Keaton does a lot of stuff in that scene, which is gonna be coming up for most rewatchables. It's like, so you bought this? Who'd you buy this with? Are you guys married? It's your first one?
27:23 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
27:23 Bill Simmons? Like, he's just like pulling information from him.
27:25 Speaker 03 So good.
27:26 Bill Simmons? And stupid ass Drake Goodman, who just sees a wallet full of $2,900. Which, by the way, he doesn't give to him.
27:32 Chris Ryan? Nope. Cause he's like, ah, I could give you this now, or I could wire you all of it next week.
27:36 Bill Simmons? Anytime somebody's like, I could wire it to you next week, like, I'm out. I'm like, hey, how about you, how about you sign the lease and we could, uh...
27:44 Speaker 03 From my bank in San Antonio? What? Yeah, I'm good.
27:48 Bill Simmons? What was the San Anto- Tropic Thunder?
27:52 Bill Simmons? What's, what is he saying there?
27:55 Chris Ryan? Crawfish.
27:56 Bill Simmons? Crawfish in Saint Antone. Uh, yeah, so Drake Goodman, professional luxury kite maker. One of the dumbest landlords of all time.
28:07 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
28:08 Bill Simmons? Terrible boyfriend, not excited at all for the pregnancy right away.
28:13 Bill Simmons? Wins the fight.
28:14 Chris Ryan? Amateur alcoholic?
28:15 Bill Simmons? Yeah, definitely put down five beers.
28:17 Speaker 03 Yeah, he hammers beers. Hammers them.
28:20 Bill Simmons? At one point, he gets in a fight with Keaton, they go through the glass door, gets in some punches, and then Melanie Griffith comes out. And he, all of a sudden, he's like a five-year-old kid, like he collapses in her arms, like, ah, I'm sorry. It's like, what are you, in kindergarten? You just fought the school bully?
28:38 Bill Simmons? Just a complete mess.
28:39 Speaker 03 He has all the traits of a spoiled rich kid, except he's not rich, so what good is he? You're right, he's a, the more you watch it, the less you like him.
28:46 Bill Simmons? This was kind of the Modine, you know, he, he would be these quirky, like Vision Quest, super quirky. I love that movie. I love him in that movie. I think he's great.
28:53 Speaker 03 So do I.
28:54 Bill Simmons? But like, just, there's a quirkiness about him, like he's like wide-eyed.
28:58 Chris Ryan? Yeah, it's off kilter.
28:59 Bill Simmons? I don't, there's been, nobody like him, right? I can't think of another actor who.
29:03 Chris Ryan? I can't think of another actor now who is like as offbeat as him, yet put in the lead role. You know what I mean? It's like, usually that guy will be like, I don't know, like the Crispin Glover, kind of like, oh, he's the comic relief for the weird buddy.
29:18 Speaker 03 The weird one.
29:19 Chris Ryan? He's often like the main, the main character. He was the leading man.
29:23 Bill Simmons? Always seems, and I just think because he looks young, he always seems three years too young for whatever role he's in. And Full Metal Jacket was, that, that kind of worked to his advantage.
29:32 Chris Ryan? Yes.
29:33 Bill Simmons? But he does Birdie, Vision Quest, Full Metal Jacket, Gross Anatomy. He's like, considerably one of the, you know, one of the best up and coming actors.
29:41 Chris Ryan? Yeah, and he's so good in Full Metal Jacket precisely because the way he's delivering his lines and the way everybody in that movie is kind of talking is like, you're like, what is going on?
29:49 Bill Simmons? Hey Joker. We haven't done that one yet. And then after this, he does Wind.
29:55 Chris Ryan? Oh, I like that movie.
29:57 Bill Simmons? Little sailing movie.
29:57 Speaker 03 I'm not familiar with the wind.
29:58 Chris Ryan? It's an America's Cup movie.
29:59 Bill Simmons? Sailing movie.
30:00 Speaker 03 Oh, sailing movie.
30:02 Bill Simmons? You'd be familiar if you surf around on Tubi.
30:04 Speaker 03 I do, I do. I'm a white squaw guy when it comes to sailing.
30:07 Bill Simmons? And then, my favorite Modine, other than Vision Quest, I like White Squaw, is, uh, is And the Band Played On, the HBO movie about, uh, about when the AIDS thing developed. And he has a great stand-up screaming everybody's speech in that movie. How much is enough?
30:24 Speaker 03 I know.
30:24 Bill Simmons? How many bodies do we have to bury? Like, but it's really good. It's, and it's, but Timmy, when he goes on tilt, you really feel it and enjoy it. What's your Modine, like, when you see Modine, what are your thoughts?
30:35 Chris Ryan? You probably think-
30:36 Speaker 04 I don't have any.
30:37 Chris Ryan? You probably think the guy, the guy from Dark Knight, right? The lieutenant or whatever?
30:41 Speaker 03 Yeah, he comes from Stranger Things.
30:42 Speaker 04 Unfortunately, it's Stranger Things, I mean, which is probably pathetic, but he, he has like a, there's almost like a Krasinski vibe to him when he's young. He's like-
30:49 Bill Simmons? That's a great one.
30:51 Speaker 04 You know, it's like-
30:51 Bill Simmons? That's who his comp is now.
30:53 Speaker 04 He could have existed in a sitcom. His style of acting, I think, almost would work that way.
30:57 Bill Simmons? Like Scrubs instead of Zack Braff?
30:59 Speaker 04 Yeah, I think he could have done something like that.
31:00 Chris Ryan? Good one.
31:00 Bill Simmons? Do you think he should have put on 50 pounds of muscle like Krasinski?
31:03 Chris Ryan? Or he could have been like Jason Segel a little bit, like, I see him in Shrinking, kinda?
31:07 Speaker 04 He's framed. I mean, he's built like a swimmer in this movie. He's like so broad and long. Huge.
31:16 Speaker 04 He could have been a superhero.
31:18 Bill Simmons? A couple of things about Modine that I find very interesting. Offered Maverick in Top Gun. Offered that before Tom Cruise. Turned it down. Um, and has talked about it since because he disagreed vehemently with the film's Cold War politics.
31:32 Speaker 03 Sure, I get it.
31:33 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
31:34 Bill Simmons? Um, which I think, I, I get it. I see it. It's just hilarious that four years later, he's in Pacific Heights. He's like, I don't agree with the Cold War politics, but tenant rights, it's a passion.
31:46 Chris Ryan? He plays the Defense Secretary in Sicario: Day of the Soldado, so I think he's loosened up a little bit.
31:51 Speaker 03 Is that true?
31:53 Chris Ryan? Where he asked Josh Brolin to kidnap a cartel king's daughter.
31:59 Bill Simmons? So changed his mind there.
32:03 Bill Simmons? His interviews are really great. He really offers a lot. This was from 1990, LA times. Now I feel like he's gonna come at us. I like Modine. I don't want him to be mad at us.
32:11 Speaker 03 That's fine. I like him too.
32:12 Bill Simmons? I feel like he's a friend. It's like how I'd make fun of Joe House.
32:17 Chris Ryan? Modine, Sunday nights with Bill.
32:20 Bill Simmons? Do some Sunday nights with us.
32:21 Chris Ryan? Maybe he could come on and do a Knicks thing with you.
32:24 Bill Simmons? I would love it. I like Modine. Here's what he says.
32:27 Chris Ryan? Say it one more time. I think everybody will believe you.
32:30 Speaker 03 I feel like you grew up with Modine, but like you came up together.
32:32 Bill Simmons? I did. He's like family. It's like a cousin.
32:36 Speaker 03 I get it. I get it.
32:37 Bill Simmons? The reason I was interested in Pacific Heights was that we as a society call ourselves civilized. And we live together in community. In that community, we make rules where we say we won't take advantage of each other. We won't think that another individual is taking advantage of us. Tried getting the benefit of the doubt. And there's always some kind of person or group who takes advantage of the goodness and kindness of the society. And then he goes into talking about divers in Acapulco.
33:04 Chris Ryan? Really?
33:05 Bill Simmons? Yeah. He's, I think he'd be an incredible podcast.
33:08 Chris Ryan? I bet.
33:08 Bill Simmons? Very eloquent, thoughtful.
33:10 Speaker 03 Well, he's active on Twitter. He was just recently tweeting about the pegboard scene was real in Vision Quest.
33:15 Bill Simmons? I love that.
33:16 Speaker 03 And it was a really cool backstory. Like he'll tell the stories. He's out there.
33:21 Bill Simmons? This movie was written by Daniel Pine, based the screenplay on several stories he heard from tenants in San Francisco pre-internet. And then it was directed by John Schlesinger.
33:31 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
33:31 Bill Simmons? Who, this was the tail end of the career here.
33:34 Chris Ryan? Yeah, but he did our beloved Marathon Man.
33:36 Bill Simmons? He did.
33:36 Speaker 03 Yeah.
33:37 Bill Simmons? Did Sunday Bloody Sunday.
33:39 Chris Ryan? Midnight Cowboy.
33:39 Bill Simmons? Midnight Cowboy, way, way back when. Falcon and the Snowman. This is not America. No. This is not.
33:49 Bill Simmons? Uh, and he did the Beliebers.
33:51 Chris Ryan? I will say that for Schlesinger, this movie has, I mean, Sam Peckinpah did Straw Dogs in the seventies. But this has like some roots in like, some of those seventies movies you would see where it was like nerdy couple, get taught a lesson about the real world by rural outlaws kind of thing. This is a little bit different. It's like more of like a sociopathic con man. But it's still like two people starting their lives thinking like, let's just take the plunge and buy a seven hundred and fifty thousand Victorian.
34:18 Bill Simmons? Yeah.
34:19 Chris Ryan? And Carter, Carter Hayes teaches them.
34:22 Bill Simmons? There's some good directing moments in this movie though. Like even when Carter Hayes is going to check back in the hotel and they're like, uh, you know, credit cards, they worked and your wife and, and the cameras like going around him and the Chancellor from nine oh two one oh for like, it's really, really good. That guy, the dad from Risky Business. But it's, it's some good craftsmanship. The only thing I wanted to mention that I think is important is this is like right in the yuppie era.
34:51 Bill Simmons? This is, we've talked about it.
34:52 Chris Ryan? Is this late yuppie?
34:53 Bill Simmons? Yeah, it's late yuppie. It's, it's, cause they filmed this in eighty nine. So we're talking, we talked about during the Wall Street podcast of, um, you know, greed is good. So let's try to make a buck. It's Reagan's the president. It's how do, how do I become rich? How do I turn a profit? And this is like them trying to buy this building. It's not like they, they restored the building, but they restore it just because it's a chance to maybe make some money from it. And the ending is really interesting when there's this other couple that comes in and they want to buy it. It's like, well, it's nine hundred thousand dollars now and they're going to turn it in. But that's kind of the mentality back then. And I don't think it's the mentality now. So if you're, if you're in your twenties and you're watching this now, Craig, yeah.
35:37 Bill Simmons? You'd be like, what the fuck's wrong with these people?
35:40 Chris Ryan? There's the, the, the idealism back then was just much more pure than it is now. We're just too cynical now.
35:47 Speaker 03 Well, it was everyone was told you you you will buy a house and then it's an airtight investment. And then you will live in it for a long time and then make a ton of money when you sell it and you're guaranteed that. And that's what they're doing here. Did you guys like when the that last scene you're talking about, Bill? When that, by the way, that guy is that guy is the dad from Friday Night Lights. Did you find yourself doing the math a lot in this movie? Like, I was trying to figure out the finances.
36:10 Chris Ryan? Like, did they put 3% down?
36:12 Speaker 03 I don't know. Back then, you could put zero down. You could like they.
36:16 Bill Simmons? I've never heard of somebody buying a house for $750,000, but then living month to month with the rent. It's like if we miss miss one month rent, we could lose this whole thing. It's like, I'm not sure how that works when you buy a house.
36:28 Speaker 03 Fudge the numbers a bit. Everybody does it.
36:30 Bill Simmons? Yeah.
36:31 Speaker 03 Yeah. And then they they sell it at the end. We don't know, but maybe somewhere in the high 800s. And they paid mid sevens, put at least 50,000 into it. Like, they make money for sure, but it's not.
36:40 Chris Ryan? It's not. It's it's not walk away money. Yeah.
36:42 Speaker 03 No.
36:42 Chris Ryan? Retirement money.
36:43 Speaker 03 No.
36:44 Bill Simmons? Weird times. 102 minutes, Craig.
36:47 Chris Ryan? Not bad.
36:47 Bill Simmons? Right there. You feel it. It just flies by.
36:49 Chris Ryan? For sure.
36:49 Bill Simmons? I could have actually used maybe two more scenes.
36:51 Chris Ryan? Use a little bit more Beverly D'Angelo.
36:53 Speaker 03 Oh, let's go. Come on.
36:55 Chris Ryan? With Ann.
36:55 Bill Simmons? Honestly, I could have used a rugby scene.
36:59 Speaker 03 There you go.
36:59 Bill Simmons? Yeah.
37:00 Speaker 03 You needed a rugby scene.
37:00 Bill Simmons? Watch Modine playing rugby in the mud.
37:03 Chris Ryan? Used a lot more Greg, you know, the guy, the guy who's helping him destroy the apartment.
37:07 Bill Simmons? Oh, yeah.
37:08 Speaker 04 I could have used the little sexual tension scene between Keaton and Griffin.
37:11 Chris Ryan? I wonder if they shot that and left it on the cutting room floor.
37:14 Speaker 04 Where like he touches her hand. They look at each other for a moment.
37:16 Chris Ryan? He intuitively understands her pain from losing her child.
37:20 Speaker 04 There to be like, oh, is there a little bit there?
37:21 Bill Simmons? I had this for later in the movie. I think the movie's missed. He's he goes heel immediately, right? He's in the house.
37:27 Chris Ryan? Well, he doesn't even get.
37:28 Bill Simmons? The weird guy's in there. Yeah, Carter's in Seattle. There's no scene where he's kind of.
37:34 Chris Ryan? Charming them.
37:35 Bill Simmons? And and he's like, hey, I brought you guys a glass of wine. Well, why don't we have it together? And then they have a glass of wine.
37:40 Chris Ryan? He's got a program he's following.
37:43 Bill Simmons? He kind of looks at her legs like we we're just missing that.
37:46 Chris Ryan? That's right.
37:47 Bill Simmons? It's just a, you know, leg shot. It's kind of salvaging a bit. Eighteen million dollar budget made fifty-five million dollars, Kyle Brandt.
37:55 Speaker 03 Fifty-five million, and it was all worth it. I have to revisit something that Chris just said. You imagine you go to this movie, you buy a ticket, and you you get an idea what it's about. All right, it's Michael Keaton, something to do with real estate. You sit down, and in the first sixty seconds, you're like, holy shit, is this Ellen Griswold's boobs in my face? What the hell is this? Uncredited Beverly D'Angelo out of the clouds with full, like, full nude, like, all timer. You must have been blown away in the theater watching that. I was rewatching it.
38:25 Bill Simmons? I had to know what stage the best, um, top.
38:29 Chris Ryan? I know you did.
38:32 Bill Simmons? Top ten, sure.
38:35 Speaker 03 Yes.
38:35 Bill Simmons? Actresses we've had.
38:36 Speaker 03 Yes.
38:37 Bill Simmons? It's like, hey, Beverly, you know, we can't sign PG thirteen or R. Do you, uh, just wanna wanna film one take where we just, we go for it? Sure. Let's go. If it's okay with Michael.
38:51 Speaker 03 It's also one of the earliest ever moments in a movie for the, okay, motherfucker. Like, we're gonna kick this up a notch. And what's so great about that is that that's Pacino saying, okay, motherfucker. And eventually he was in on that.
39:03 Bill Simmons? Right, yeah, that's true. They had a kid together.
39:05 Chris Ryan? They sure did.
39:07 Bill Simmons? Yeah, I Googled, I Googled, uh, I was thinking this should be a category, things I Google as I'm prepping the the rundown for rewatchables. But I Googled Beverly D'Angelo nude scenes, because I couldn't remember how many times she she had dabbled.
39:24 Chris Ryan? On that iPad or this iPad?
39:25 Bill Simmons? No, it was on this iPad. Um, and all this research came up of her nude scene in Vacation, which apparently she was like, fuck it, I'll do it.
39:33 Speaker 03 Yeah.
39:34 Bill Simmons? And there was this whole story about Anthony Michael Hall getting in trouble because he tried to sneak onto the set.
39:39 Chris Ryan? When she was doing her nude scene?
39:40 Bill Simmons? I don't think came up in our research when we did rewatchables initially, and then they had to kick him off the set because he was basically fourteen years old.
39:48 Chris Ryan? Filming Porky's?
39:49 Bill Simmons? Yeah. Tried to watch through a people. Uh, Roger Ebert, two stars. You know who's not a fan of of From Hell Month, the late Roger Ebert?
39:59 Chris Ryan? Finds these movies pretty stupid.
40:01 Bill Simmons? Detests his movies. Pacific Heights is a horror film for yuppies in which the bad guy uses the axe to attack your three flat, not you.
40:11 Chris Ryan? The thing is that I could easily see this being the premise of a Hitchcock movie. I mean, even down to the setting, but the idea of being terrorized in your own house seems like something that was ready-made for him. And then Roger would be like, ah, the master.
40:23 Bill Simmons? I never much liked the young couple or believed they liked each other.
40:27 Speaker 03 There you go.
40:27 Bill Simmons? And I didn't see enough of Keaton in the early stages of the movie because he was always behind a closed door. Fair criticism.
40:32 Chris Ryan? It is, that is true.
40:33 Bill Simmons? Um, I, I, I was gonna do this later, I'll do it now. This would have been a great De Palma movie.
40:39 Chris Ryan? Yes.
40:39 Speaker 03 For sure.
40:40 Bill Simmons? I think you ramp up the sexuality all the way through. I think you change, you recast Melanie Griffith or Tower, just can you go into body double mode here?
40:48 Chris Ryan? He would be doing all this stuff, like going between walls.
40:51 Bill Simmons? Yeah, yeah.
40:51 Chris Ryan? Drake and Patty are humping, Carter's listening, you know, like that kind of.
40:55 Bill Simmons? There's definitely a Carter sneaks in and is watching when they're having sex scene.
40:59 Chris Ryan? Yeah. Um. Carter makes Anne come over but calls her Patty. It's just like, it would be so twisted.
41:04 Bill Simmons? All kinds of shit going on.
41:05 Speaker 03 See, I would take that and I, I would just, I would just go one notch higher with Fincher. And then it's, then it's getting really dark.
41:12 Bill Simmons? Oh, like panic room.
41:13 Speaker 03 Carter forcing himself on her.
41:15 Chris Ryan? I don't know if I could handle Fincher with the roaches. I just think he would do something really gross.
41:19 Bill Simmons? We're gonna take a break. We're gonna come back with most rewatchable scene, and I had a surprising amount of them. This episode is brought to you by Quince. Finding a decent piece of clothing can be a lot harder than finding a decent movie, but that was before Quince. Quince has staple pieces made from premium materials like 100% Mongolian cashmere. And everything is priced 50 to 80% less than similar brands. It's the perfect place to start building a cozy fall outfit without any absurd markups. For instance, I love a good vest. They have a lightweight, down, packable puffer vest, which is an easy fall layer. Although, nobody loves layers more than Chris Ryan. Uh, you can throw it over a sweater, long sleeve, whenever you want to make an outfit feel a little more seasonal.
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43:01 Bill Simmons? Most rewatchable scene. Kyle mentioned the sheer thrill of seeing Mrs. Griswold getting it on a minute in this movie. Congrats to her.
43:08 Speaker 03 Bill, one year after Christmas vacation, in which she spends the entire Christmas Eve with this like center cut bosom busting thing and you're like, God, she's so attractive and cool. 10 seconds into the movie, just lying around naked. It was, the 13 year old me went crazy. Loved it.
43:22 Bill Simmons? Also, she's just covered in her own cigarette smoke.
43:26 Chris Ryan? Just smoking and wearing a kimono the entire movie.
43:28 Bill Simmons? It's coming out of her nostrils constantly. It's almost like, it's like she's wearing a reverse oxygen mask or something, just spitting out smoke.
43:38 Bill Simmons? Most rewatchable scene. I love a good house renovation scene.
43:41 Speaker 03 Sure.
43:41 Bill Simmons? Going right into a super awkward rental scene with, with a prospective black tenant.
43:46 Chris Ryan? Have you ever done?
43:48 Bill Simmons? Really, really interesting from a 1990 perspective.
43:50 Chris Ryan? For sure. And then winds up being a real.
43:52 Bill Simmons? Be really, really interesting.
43:53 Chris Ryan? Chekhov's black tenant. But have you ever done your own demo work?
43:58 Bill Simmons? No.
43:58 Chris Ryan? No.
43:59 Bill Simmons? What are you talking about?
44:00 Chris Ryan? I'm just curious.
44:01 Speaker 03 Sledgehammer, gloves.
44:02 Chris Ryan? If you've ever gotten a hammer out and just.
44:03 Bill Simmons? Look at these hands. No.
44:05 Speaker 03 Chris, have you?
44:07 Chris Ryan? I've never owned.
44:08 Speaker 04 Look at these baby soft hands of mine.
44:10 Bill Simmons? Yeah. These hands are as soft as a baby's bottom.
44:14 Speaker 03 I thought Chris made that place where you guys stopped paying rent.
44:16 Bill Simmons? No. Yeah. I used to have calluses here. That's it.
44:20 Chris Ryan? I didn't know, like, back in Boston or your first LA house, you were like, yeah, let's take this wall down.
44:25 Bill Simmons? No.
44:25 Chris Ryan? Let's open this place up a little.
44:26 Speaker 03 I didn't think that.
44:27 Bill Simmons? That's a no. Um, I'm sorry, I just get the runaround so much.
44:33 Bill Simmons? Felt bad for that guy.
44:34 Chris Ryan? Yeah, Carl.
44:35 Bill Simmons? I thought he was also Carl Lumber, maybe a little too aggro initially, but I get it.
44:41 Speaker 03 You wanted that place.
44:42 Bill Simmons? Yeah. Also, I'm putting the, I'm not putting it under the door. My lease application, it's in an, it's in a Manila envelope, attention, whatever.
44:51 Chris Ryan? Drake and Patty could have just been a little bit more on the same page about who was handling applications and who was doing what.
44:56 Bill Simmons? They weren't on the same page in this entire movie. Uh, Kyle mentioned this scene already, Keaton comes in, asks a bunch of questions. This is your first place. How about if I pay 2,000 now? Actually, I'll wire you everything from my bank in San Antonio.
45:09 Chris Ryan? Like a speedbag in this, in this scene.
45:11 Bill Simmons? Bank in San Antonio.
45:13 Speaker 03 Cause I know, it sounds so made up. And this is, there's twin scenes. He works the idiot, Drake, and then he gets the smart girl. And he's doing that thing where he's like, did you pick out these light fixtures? And then there's this shot where he gives her a quick up and down in the body. And he's like, you've got great taste. It's a, it's a great scene. I love that one.
45:32 Bill Simmons? I work for a private trust. I don't really have a traditional kind of credit.
45:35 Speaker 03 Sure.
45:36 Chris Ryan? This is up there.
45:37 Bill Simmons? What?
45:38 Chris Ryan? I was thinking about like.
45:38 Bill Simmons? Who would buy this? What, how stupid do you have to be? Maybe he had CTE from the rugby?
45:43 Chris Ryan? This is a very like, what, what's the most 1990 thing, but like, it's, uh, the idea of being like, I work for a private trust. It's based in San Antonio. You, you, you're not going to get a usual credit history. It's up there with like, I'd love to do this, but I just have to move some money around. Right. Sure. Yeah. Take out your phone and move the money around.
46:00 Bill Simmons? Right. Yeah. Motherfucker, come back with that money.
46:03 Speaker 03 To me, it sounds like, uh, she lives in Canada. I met her at Niagara Falls.
46:06 Bill Simmons? The same thing. Like, what's the Mount Rushmore of, yeah, you would have known her.
46:11 Speaker 03 Ever lay anybody around here?
46:15 Bill Simmons? He says, I'm always running into this problem, you know?
46:18 Chris Ryan? Yeah, I bet you are.
46:20 Bill Simmons? Carter Hayes? What do we think about Carter Hayes and Drake Goodman as names?
46:25 Chris Ryan? I think they're supposed to be anonymous because Danforth keeps moving through identities. So I, I think it's like an easy, it's an easy name to like replicate and to like get.
46:34 Bill Simmons? What Ringer podcast would Carter Hayes host?
46:38 Speaker 03 Oh, straight lacrosse, dude. That's an AI lax name right there if I ever heard one.
46:44 Bill Simmons? It's like, we've gotten rid of Danny Heifetz in the fantasy football show. We've replaced him with Carter Hayes and Drake Goodman.
46:49 Chris Ryan? If Carter Hayes started doing some town episodes.
46:55 Bill Simmons? He's a billionaire now. Um.
46:59 Bill Simmons? This is my favorite scene in the movie and
47:02 Speaker 03 Okay.
47:02 Bill Simmons? just because it makes me laugh so hard. It immediately turns you against Drake Goodman for the rest of the movie and he becomes the bad guy. When they're talking about Mr. Baker, how he came in the perspective of black tenant. And he goes, I don't know, maybe he's one of those minority scam artists.
47:17 Chris Ryan? That was a weird aggro racist term by him.
47:20 Bill Simmons? Is this a new category for us? The Drake and Goodman Award for most unexpected casual racism?
47:26 Chris Ryan? No, no, it's not a racial thing. It's common sense.
47:29 Speaker 03 Sure.
47:30 Chris Ryan? That guy is so psyched to vote for Bush.
47:33 Bill Simmons? What?
47:34 Speaker 03 He almost catches himself saying, I have a lot of black friends, honey. Like, it's right there.
47:38 Chris Ryan? To be fair, he does. His only friend is black.
47:41 Speaker 03 He does. That's true.
47:42 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
47:42 Speaker 03 That's true.
47:43 Bill Simmons? It's weird because he's both racist, but they're renting the other apartment to a Japanese couple and his only friend is black. So why are you being racist? It's just bizarre.
47:56 Chris Ryan? Drake Goodman racist kite maker.
48:01 Chris Ryan? That should be under character in the impressions.
48:06 Bill Simmons? Sorry, you'll never get one of these kites.
48:07 Chris Ryan? Yeah, I don't trust this guy. He's Mexican. I'm just a kite maker. I just call him like I see it.
48:16 Bill Simmons? We need it about a World Cup show.
48:18 Chris Ryan? Drake Goodman in the first Sicario. It's like, yeah, finding him would be like finding a vaccine for a disease.
48:25 Bill Simmons? Obviously about a World Cup show.
48:28 Bill Simmons? Ecuador typical.
48:29 Chris Ryan? That's just basically Alexi Lawless.
48:35 Chris Ryan? It kinda is.
48:36 Bill Simmons? Oh, man. Carter somehow gets into the place is my next rewatchable scene.
48:42 Speaker 03 Yeah.
48:42 Chris Ryan? Yeah, this is my, this is tough because this is where they gave him an inch of daylight and he just is in. Yeah.
48:49 Bill Simmons? Did they?
48:50 Chris Ryan? Well, cuz that's the great thing.
48:51 Bill Simmons? Did he sign the lease? I guess he did.
48:53 Chris Ryan? He says he signed the lease, but he's obviously not paid. He immediately changes the locks.
48:58 Bill Simmons? He got in because somebody opened the door, but their mistake was not locking the lower apartment. So, again.
49:06 Speaker 03 They're just so disorganized. They got people moving in. They, they have money problems. We need this guy. They, they don't have anybody watching the till. Yeah, and went to double overtime. Like, there's a lot going on. The kites are running behind schedule.
49:18 Chris Ryan? There was an intense scrum he was a part of.
49:21 Bill Simmons? I wanted to see her if she ran like the equestrian club like this. There's just little kids riding on horses away from someplace in Malibu or whatever.
49:33 Bill Simmons? Hayes in the garage. We go from he barely gets in to he's in Seattle to now he's just smoking a cigarette in the dark in the garage. Again, I feel like we're missing a scene, but I think this is a really good flipping the razor blades.
49:47 Chris Ryan? Yes.
49:48 Bill Simmons? It's like, okay. And this is 22 minutes into the movie. It's like, all right. We're not even gonna like play the game and pretend we're buddies here.
49:57 Chris Ryan? Right.
49:57 Bill Simmons? We're just going for it.
49:58 Speaker 03 I looked for you guys. He's smoking that cigarette in the car with the windows up too.
50:02 Chris Ryan? Yes.
50:02 Speaker 03 Like, it's, it's, it's a full psycho. He doesn't care.
50:05 Bill Simmons? Yeah, that might is arguably the most sociopathic thing he did in the movie.
50:09 Speaker 03 In a small Porsche coupe too. That ain't invented.
50:12 Bill Simmons? Cuz that car's gonna fucking stink for 10 years after that.
50:15 Chris Ryan? Roaches in jars is pretty nuts as well, yeah.
50:17 Bill Simmons? Yeah, that's pretty. Uh, next rewatchable scene.
50:20 Chris Ryan? He changed the locks!
50:24 Speaker 03 Look, I can handle this, Patty! I know.
50:29 Bill Simmons? This is where my wife, I wrote down her quote. He's acting very irrational and it's bothering me. That was a direct quote from my wife.
50:36 Chris Ryan? Yeah, she, Patty needed to take, take the con here. She needs to take over.
50:41 Bill Simmons? Patty needed to give him the Vito Corleone, "You can act like a man!"
50:44 Speaker 03 Yeah.
50:45 Bill Simmons? Just like shake his, shake his shirt. He's just a mess at this point. Uh, next one, cockroaches. Which leads to Drake climbing under the apartment at the perfect time where we get to hear the entire plot of the movie. Thanks to our two bad guys. They're just doing a podcast about their heist they're doing.
51:01 Chris Ryan? Well, you brought me in on this.
51:02 Bill Simmons? Yeah.
51:02 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
51:03 Bill Simmons? The cat's in there, there's cockroaches that fall on the head. Good, probably Modine's best moment in the movie. Those are 20 live cockroaches getting dropped on his head.
51:12 Chris Ryan? So this is right when the cat gets taken, right?
51:14 Bill Simmons? Yeah.
51:15 Chris Ryan? Uh, when you and I have shared that in the nineties, earlier decades in American history, we've, we had a little bit more of a transient, like kind of a flippant relationship to house pets.
51:26 Bill Simmons? Yeah.
51:26 Chris Ryan? This is what we mean. You know, like when, when it's just like, eh, you just get another cat. When he tells Patty they have our cat, she's just like, too bad.
51:34 Speaker 03 Doesn't give a shit.
51:37 Bill Simmons? Honestly, I was gonna have Mallory as our fourth and I just feel like she would've spent an hour and a half talking about the cat.
51:42 Speaker 03 Yeah. I just don't understand.
51:44 Bill Simmons? Just would've been.
51:45 Speaker 03 They would have its own Instagram account.
51:46 Bill Simmons? Yeah.
51:47 Speaker 03 Member of the family, we travel with it.
51:49 Bill Simmons? Yeah.
51:50 Speaker 03 But he takes those bugs to the face like a champ. I like that.
51:53 Bill Simmons? He really?
51:53 Speaker 03 Reminds me of, uh, like Kate Capshaw in Temple of Doom gets like bugs and centipedes all over her. It's like that. It's a good, cool moment.
52:00 Bill Simmons? What if, uh, if you had to say more impressive to the pegs? Vision Quest going all the way up or the 20 cockroaches on the face? What did Modine, what impressed you more from Modine?
52:13 Speaker 03 The cockroaches to the face is like a bad, like Joe Rogan Fear Factor episode. Uh, that pegboard? I couldn't do that thing even when I was in high school. I think it's the pegboard by far. That thing is very hard, very hard.
52:23 Bill Simmons? Yeah, incredible stuff by Modine. He's a fucking legend.
52:27 Bill Simmons? Carter brings the flowers over after making the police call just to get his ass kicked. Goes through the front door. We get a cry hug after Drake does the beating. And then we get the lawyer going, this is what he wanted. Game over. Drake loses. She's just giving them the basics at all time.
52:44 Speaker 03 Well, God help us if this becomes personal.
52:46 Bill Simmons? Right.
52:46 Speaker 03 Oh, man. So good.
52:48 Bill Simmons? Fight scene, any thoughts, Kyle?
52:50 Speaker 03 I do. Yeah, I have some thoughts. First of all, I had this on Unanswerable Questions. Incredible job baiting the hook with the preemptive police call. What is Carter's play if Goodman doesn't take the bait? In other words, he's mad, but like he's not beating him up. You just keep kind of riding him and you have some burners?
53:08 Chris Ryan? If you pull at this, like, yes, I mean, my Unanswerable Questions are similarly based in Kyle. But like, I don't know what he does if Drake's just like, okay, well, I tried. You know, like.
53:19 Bill Simmons? Now, see, I think he studied this man, this idiot Drake Goodman for weeks on end.
53:25 Chris Ryan? He saw him get excited by just the sight of $3,000. Yeah.
53:28 Bill Simmons? This is like Brunson in game five with Wemby, just like, I've solved this seven foot six for you.
53:33 Speaker 03 I've got it.
53:33 Bill Simmons? I'm just gonna beat him off the dribble. He's gonna buy every fake I have and then I'm gonna score on him anyway. I think, I think he knew what was gonna happen.
53:40 Speaker 03 Heavy artillery ready to, to some, some, some sound bites or maybe some gestures. He was gonna get him to punch him one way or another.
53:46 Bill Simmons? Once he found out about the rugby, he's like, this guy's gonna punch me.
53:49 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
53:50 Bill Simmons? This guy plays rugby on Sundays.
53:51 Chris Ryan? He could just be like, rugby, it's not a real sport.
53:54 Speaker 03 God damn it! Every rugby player is just a failed football player, right Drake? And then the punches would start.
54:02 Bill Simmons? Drake gets shot?
54:05 Speaker 03 Yeah.
54:06 Bill Simmons? This was a whoa. I like the camera too, where Keaton comes, Keaton turns off the lights and he's in the background.
54:13 Speaker 03 Yeah.
54:15 Bill Simmons? Do you think, I had this for Unanswerable, do you think he meant to kill him or just hurt him?
54:19 Chris Ryan? I think he meant to maim him, because I think the entire point is that.
54:22 Bill Simmons? He wants to take his identity or what?
54:23 Chris Ryan? The first con is supposed to be, I will basically get this house as payment for the debts that they're gonna owe me. Right?
54:32 Bill Simmons? Yeah.
54:32 Chris Ryan? The civil complaint that I have. And then he's just gonna sell the house for nothing, like, uh, and, and make like whatever the profit is for that. But then I think as it goes on, it becomes more of an identity theft thing.
54:45 Bill Simmons? What do you think, Kyle?
54:46 Speaker 03 Well, I think, yeah, he shoots him by accident and then he plants the crowbar. But I'm glad Chris said that because I think even watching it now as an adult, it's a little hazy exactly what Carter's end game is. I've watched it, I'm like, what is the plan? Like, he strips the apartment and I think maybe he sells all the light fixtures and the tile or something.
55:05 Chris Ryan? Yeah, like I think for him, it's like all cash business. I just need moving around money. But I don't know that he is like, uh, this score will set me up. Like, I think he's addicted to like being on the run and addicted to this kind of terror.
55:18 Bill Simmons? I have the answers.
55:20 Speaker 03 What do you got?
55:20 Bill Simmons? He destroys the place because he's a fucking sociopath who smokes cigarettes with the windows up in his car.
55:27 Bill Simmons? He fully intends to win a civil suit against Drake and get the house.
55:30 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
55:31 Speaker 03 Yeah.
55:31 Bill Simmons? And then he'll just flip the house.
55:32 Chris Ryan? But not like then start at life there. He's gonna flip it.
55:34 Bill Simmons? No, he's gonna flip it and move to the next city.
55:36 Chris Ryan? Right.
55:37 Speaker 03 Yeah.
55:38 Chris Ryan? There's just like way easier ways of making $200,000.
55:42 Bill Simmons? Definitely, you have to get the shit kicked out of you, like.
55:44 Chris Ryan? Look at Patty, she's a fucking equestrian teacher. Do something.
55:48 Bill Simmons? Fly some kites.
55:51 Bill Simmons? Patty's scene that Carter destroyed the place.
55:55 Chris Ryan? Yeah, she's really upset about it.
55:57 Bill Simmons? It's a good scene.
55:58 Chris Ryan? All of her light fixtures.
55:59 Bill Simmons? It's Melanie Griffith's best work in the movie. Followed by her meeting the tenant that she didn't rent to.
56:05 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
56:07 Bill Simmons? Her boyfriend is a casual racist. My favorite part of the movie, Patty spies on Carter for the day and somehow gets into this hotel room. This 15, 10 minutes, whatever it is.
56:17 Chris Ryan? I wish there was like three more things like this.
56:19 Bill Simmons? Honestly, this could have been the whole movie.
56:21 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
56:22 Speaker 03 She does like the full Kevin McCallister. I'm just gonna order everything to room service.
56:27 Bill Simmons? Fishy swah.
56:28 Speaker 03 Caesar, creme brulee. It's, she's just, she's like having a shopping spree and it's, as your audience, you've been waiting for 90 minutes for this. It's very satisfying.
56:35 Chris Ryan? You know what they?
56:36 Bill Simmons? Craig's nodding happily. I know that he loves this part.
56:38 Speaker 03 Best scene in the movie.
56:39 Chris Ryan? Easily the most rewatchable scene. The whole thing with the maid, they're like, I do find it a little ridiculous that Carter keeps his entire biography and newspaper clippings in his suitcase.
56:48 Speaker 03 Well, we learned it from Helmut that everybody does that.
56:51 Bill Simmons? That was Fatal Attraction created it and now that.
56:53 Speaker 03 Single white female.
56:54 Bill Simmons? Hell month, you have to keep the scrapbook.
56:56 Chris Ryan? But you know what it reminded me of was Jean Triplehorn's move in The Firm, where she goes down to the Caymans with Avery. And like, I thought it would have been great if Patty was like, Carter, you're the fucking man. Take me with you on your next score. And like tried to seduce him a little bit, but you know, basically was always just trying to build a case against him. Yeah.
57:17 Bill Simmons? That's for the Apple scripted series that's gonna happen from this. I learned that from this scene, the maid always lets you in, in any movie. If you try this in real life, they're like, I'm sorry, sir. I can't do that. You're gonna have to go back down and like, her, her excuse is like, I can't get into my room. Like, it's like, you're in the 10th floor, just go down and get a fucking key.
57:37 Chris Ryan? Also, what's the-
57:38 Bill Simmons? The maid always falls for it in the movies.
57:40 Chris Ryan? Like, what, what is with the, like, her leaving, then taking back, then leaving a little bit of cash for the maid? Is she trying to decide how much Carter owes her versus the maid?
57:50 Bill Simmons? I think she was like, I'll do a good deed for this lady. And then she's like, oh yeah, we're broke. I'm about to lose my house.
57:55 Speaker 04 I do think that's it, which is such a weird thing to add. She's like, well, I want to give the maid all of the money. What is she gonna do with it?
58:01 Speaker 03 She's a good person. Yeah. Bill, this is like, this is one of those things that happens in movies and not in real life. Like when you go into a bar and say, I'll have a beer. That, you have to say the name of the beer. I recently had this in a hotel like six months ago where I was locked out and I asked the maid. I was like, can you please let me in? Here's my ID, here's everything. And this lady was going to war. She, no matter what I said, she would not let me in.
58:20 Chris Ryan? It's a fireable offense.
58:22 Bill Simmons? Any hotel's gonna be like, you're fired if you let it in.
58:24 Chris Ryan? You gotta go downstairs. I don't have, I can't, I can't let you in. Yeah.
58:28 Speaker 03 I know.
58:29 Bill Simmons? I like that. I like when people go nuts in a bad guy's hotel room, which she does, when they flip out. The scrapbook of his evil work is especially good. It's probably the best scrapbook we've had.
58:41 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
58:42 Bill Simmons? There's perfectly cut newspaper clippings. Hey, here's what I lost out the family estate to my brother.
58:48 Chris Ryan? It's just like so weird because it's like, if you're Carter, it's not like you've forgotten what you've done.
58:53 Bill Simmons? Right. You have all these pictures. Here's me and my twin brother in a chimpanzee.
58:58 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
58:59 Bill Simmons? Yeah.
58:59 Speaker 03 That's probably when he started losing his mind. And also, listen, you have, um- Tom Sizemore calls guys slick in prison, changing the entire plot of the movie.
59:09 Chris Ryan? Yeah, Jim Danforth unlocks the entire thing.
59:12 Speaker 03 Come on, he left the scrap back with his real name on the back in the middle of the trash department. That's like the slick equivalent here.
59:20 Bill Simmons? I like when she takes the chocolate.
59:22 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
59:23 Speaker 03 Oh, she earned that chocolate.
59:24 Bill Simmons? That whole scene is just great. Then the final fight scene. You crossed the line.
59:30 Speaker 03 Yeah.
59:31 Bill Simmons? The nail gun?
59:32 Chris Ryan? Very scary.
59:33 Bill Simmons? Call back to the nail gun or it just had stopped working for her? And then we get the Alan Rickman. There's Bruce Willis right there staring. Bruce Willis staring at CR, slinking, staring him down. We get the fall backwards, even though he's just in a kitchen.
59:52 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
59:54 Bill Simmons? Going backwards, just put your hands behind you.
59:59 Bill Simmons? Our guy Matthew Modine, another interview he did, 2024.
1:00:01 Speaker 03 What's he got now? Come on.
1:00:03 Bill Simmons? I think the movie would have made a load more money if at the end, when Michael Keaton fell in the spikes, if he'd started to pull himself up and I'd reached up from where I was below him and pulled him back down onto them. Because he shot me, he's beaten me with a golf club, he's ruined my life, he's destroyed my apartment. The audience really wanted my character Drake Goodman to get one back at him.
1:00:25 Chris Ryan? To be fair to him, man, I do all due respect to Matthew Modine.
1:00:29 Speaker 03 Go on.
1:00:30 Chris Ryan? Do you think anyone in the history of movie going would be like, yeah, it was a pretty good movie until the very end when Drake Goodman finally double impales him? And everybody's like, I gotta go out and see that for myself. I would make a load more money because of that.
1:00:46 Bill Simmons? I think more people would have wanted Drake Goodman to die at the end of the movie. I wish he had died from the golf club beating. I hate Drake Goodman.
1:00:52 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:00:53 Speaker 03 I guess I should say this now. My weak link of the film, I think Carter's death is fucking horrible. I think the whole scene is so lame. You do get Chekhov's nail gun, but you don't get that killed with it. And can we just, can we walk through what Drake's plan was here? He's just been beaten with a golf club and his bullet wounds. He's gonna go underneath the room in the chance that there's some glory hole he can reach through and do a Brazilian leg lock to trip him?
1:01:21 Bill Simmons? Yes.
1:01:21 Speaker 03 And that final shot is like something that Nordberg would do. It looks ridiculous. I think the last scene is bad.
1:01:28 Bill Simmons? It's the worst part of the movie. I agree.
1:01:30 Chris Ryan? They didn't know how to end it.
1:01:31 Bill Simmons? I also think he's kind of holding on to his leg and Keaton's looking down. Just kick your leg.
1:01:38 Speaker 03 Yeah, stop his fingers.
1:01:39 Bill Simmons? The guy's like this.
1:01:40 Speaker 03 Really injured.
1:01:40 Bill Simmons? Yeah, just like hurt his arm.
1:01:42 Speaker 03 Keaton's like, whoa!
1:01:45 Bill Simmons? Has no idea how to react.
1:01:46 Chris Ryan? It's like they shot Keaton thinking he was gonna fall out a window. But then the actual reality is he just falls onto the floor.
1:01:53 Bill Simmons? It would have been better if he just put his hand up and tripped him. And then he fell like face first on the thing.
1:01:59 Speaker 04 It fell through the floor, down to Modine or something.
1:02:02 Chris Ryan? It would have been amazing.
1:02:02 Speaker 03 Imagine Hans Gruber, instead of falling 50 stories, just fell down on the ground and died. That's what it is.
1:02:07 Chris Ryan? What if like, you know, Drake was hiding underneath the floor and then he just lets a kite out at the last second?
1:02:13 Speaker 03 Oh, yeah.
1:02:15 Bill Simmons? He's got a kite with razor blades on it.
1:02:17 Speaker 04 I'm always upset that nobody says anything in this final moment.
1:02:20 Chris Ryan? Yeah, I know.
1:02:20 Speaker 04 Like, he's a lot, Carter's alive for 20 seconds staring at you. Like, that's when you get in your line, that's when you put a cockroach on his face.
1:02:27 Chris Ryan? You gotta, or you gotta just be like, you're evicted.
1:02:29 Speaker 04 Yeah.
1:02:30 Speaker 03 Yes.
1:02:31 Bill Simmons? We've rejected you.
1:02:33 Chris Ryan? Your rent is past due.
1:02:35 Speaker 04 Yeah.
1:02:37 Speaker 03 Say goodbye to that security deposit asshole. It's perfect.
1:02:41 Chris Ryan? Honey, call the angry black guy. We have a vacancy.
1:02:49 Bill Simmons? Hotel room is the best scene.
1:02:52 Bill Simmons? The re, that's the most rewatchable.
1:02:53 Chris Ryan? No brainer.
1:02:55 Bill Simmons? What's the most 1990 thing about this movie, Kyle Brandt?
1:02:59 Speaker 03 You know, sometimes when you're just lying on the couch, riddled with bullet wounds, you just need to bang out some Soundgarden on MTV and just turn it the fuck up and it'll just take you where you need to go.
1:03:10 Chris Ryan? He's so self-satisfied and then he's just like, I'm just cozy.
1:03:13 Speaker 03 Yeah! And it's just, it's rocking out early Soundgarden. It's this song called Hands All Over, it's metal as hell. He should be watching like Price is Right or something like, no. MTV Soundgarden, like turned up to 11, it makes me so happy.
1:03:28 Bill Simmons? Yeah, an MTV video of a grunge song that they probably wouldn't have played in 1989 or 1990, I'm guessing. I don't think that one's playing. What's your favorite?
1:03:36 Chris Ryan? Just all the banking and tenant application stuff, waiting for wire transfers. And then also, this has now become a tenant of a...
1:03:46 Chris Ryan? From Hell movies, letters of reference, again.
1:03:48 Bill Simmons? Sure.
1:03:49 Chris Ryan? It's just like, hey, I have this letter of reference. Well, it's airtight. We better just get this guy in the apartment.
1:03:55 Bill Simmons? Well, how about, how about, here's a phone number of my previous landlord.
1:03:58 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:03:59 Bill Simmons? And it's just some lady having a cigarette. Yeah, Carter's great.
1:04:02 Chris Ryan? Yeah, I had to give him money to, to, to just to be here. Yeah.
1:04:05 Bill Simmons? You don't have a, an address for him, do you? That's a red flag.
1:04:08 Chris Ryan? I also had a Drake being kind of blown away by Carter having a, a car alarm.
1:04:14 Bill Simmons? Oh, yeah, that was really impressive.
1:04:15 Chris Ryan? He's just like, whoa.
1:04:17 Speaker 03 He dunked on him.
1:04:18 Chris Ryan? Are you from the future?
1:04:23 Bill Simmons? Uh, I had buying a huge San Francisco three-story house for $750,000.
1:04:28 Chris Ryan? Although 1.9 million adjusted for today's money.
1:04:32 Bill Simmons? Hmm. Ebert calling this a horror film for yuppies. Um, anyone working for a designer kite company? I feel like that has to specifically be 1989 or 90.
1:04:42 Chris Ryan? Yeah. That's, that's real like Earth Day kind of vibes, you know, like we're just gonna go outside to the park.
1:04:48 Bill Simmons? Not being able to Google your bad guy tenant. Be like, I'm just gonna check out this Carter Hayes, see if there's anything online. And then, uh, Melanie's haircut.
1:04:58 Speaker 03 Yeah. Come on. Come on, Bill. You waited long enough. Let's do it.
1:05:02 Bill Simmons? It's very specific to the, uh, that 8990. It's, I want some life in it. It's like a bob. My wife kinda liked it, but it's kind of a bob. I don't know if it exists two years later. I think she goes shorter.
1:05:15 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:05:16 Bill Simmons? Um, and it's just very specific to that era and I don't know why. Or, or her clothes in general are very late 80s, 1990-ish. Um, I'm so excited. This is my favorite category. The Floyd Gondalee Butter on My Ass, Lollipops on My Mouth Award. For something I just enjoy. I'll go first.
1:05:35 Speaker 03 Okay.
1:05:37 Bill Simmons? I love in movies like this, when people do over the top rich guy stuff. And it's like the most cliched rich guy thing you could possibly do. In this case, Carter Hayes on his next score, picks up the wealthy lady in this giant mansion. What are we gonna do? An idea, um, I'm gonna put a sweater over my shoulders. I have a yacht, little three hour yacht trip and let's drink some champagne. It just seems super rich together. Nobody in the planet does this in real life, not one. In a movie though, great. Champagne yacht trip. Captain, take us out.
1:06:14 Chris Ryan? Yeah, I've got my sweater around my shoulders.
1:06:16 Bill Simmons? I'm gonna make sure my sweaters. Nobody does this, Kyle.
1:06:19 Speaker 03 He definitely had lobster and caviar too. That's what you do back in the day. Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous.
1:06:24 Bill Simmons? No question.
1:06:25 Speaker 03 That's a great, great pull. First of all, I haven't thought about anything for the last five minutes than ways that Carter Hayes could suffer a kite death. That's all I want in life. I feel like maybe there could, maybe Sarah, there could have been like a key or something like Benjamin Franklin, like another famous kiter. That's all I want was a kite death. Floyd Gondoli, things I just enjoy. I really enjoy Orkin's presence in this movie.
1:06:48 Bill Simmons? Very good.
1:06:49 Speaker 03 Bob, the sidekick of the Joker in the Batman movie shows up and Bill, this is probably in half ass internet. The Orkin company sued and how they were portrayed in this movie because I have this vision that there's like a VP of marketing who goes to the CEO and is like, sir, I really think we should write the check for this Matthew Modine movie. I think we want to be in it. They go to the premiere, they're sitting there like, here's the scene, here's the roaches, here it comes. And then it's this idiot bumbling Barney five moron.
1:07:17 Bill Simmons? He's like, I guess I have to step on them.
1:07:18 Speaker 03 He can't do anything. And then I feel like the Orkin people went to the premiere and at the after party, they were at the same table as the Marriott people. And Marriott people are like, this movie was great. We love how we were portrayed, the front desk guy, the roof service guy. Yeah, the manager with all the balls to stand up to the, we love it. And the Orkin people were furious. That gives me great amusement.
1:07:40 Bill Simmons? It's pretty good.
1:07:40 Chris Ryan? It is, yeah.
1:07:42 Bill Simmons? What was that guy? What?
1:07:43 Chris Ryan? Tracy Walter, he's in Repo Man, he's in Batman, yeah.
1:07:46 Speaker 03 He's in Silence of the Lambs, forming an autopsy. He's been around.
1:07:51 Bill Simmons? Yeah, he's one of those guys. What do you have?
1:07:53 Chris Ryan? Oh, uh, just any, any movie where a car pulls up to the top of the hill in San Francisco. As it's going home to like, it's just like, those shots of those hills are just always like, this movie can be about anything.
1:08:05 Bill Simmons? What's age the best, other than anyone asking a trusty maid to let them into a hotel room? That is theirs. Always works. I always get excited when it happens. It never can happen in real life. What do you have for what's age the best, Kyle?
1:08:18 Speaker 03 I already kind of mentioned that Patty is just so much smarter than Drake. I like that.
1:08:21 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:08:22 Speaker 03 Uh, and he's like a total dick to her and she just sees over it. And then on the same related note, uh, I just want to give some respect to Melanie Griffith's jeans in this movie. They're like the fourth lead of the film. They're, they're, I mean, they're up to her armpits. They're belted. They're frosted. I can't take my eyes off them. Her final shot in the movie is up the stairs, walking. It's just fantastic. And I love her jeans in this movie. G E N E S and J E N S.
1:08:46 Chris Ryan? That's right. I would say, uh, what's age the best? Um, probably just the, the idea of like the, the beta trying to, to fight the alpha. Like Drake being pitted against a guy who has everything that he doesn't and everything comes easy, more easily to that guy.
1:09:01 Bill Simmons? Rugby beta?
1:09:02 Chris Ryan? Yeah. Rugby beta with a con man alpha. So I really enjoyed that.
1:09:06 Bill Simmons? I have music by Hans Zimmer.
1:09:08 Speaker 03 Yeah, yeah.
1:09:10 Bill Simmons? Hans is like, yeah, I'm not doing anything that week. I could whip something together. Evil tenant movie? Okay. I'll, I'll work on it. Um, casual rental racism, cut me back to burden a landlord.
1:09:20 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:09:21 Bill Simmons? So what's age the best? Scrapbook with someone's evil past. I had for, uh, another Beverly DeAngel nude scene. It's like Devin Hester with kickoff touchdowns. It's like, he did it again.
1:09:33 Bill Simmons? Ninety-eight yards.
1:09:35 Speaker 03 And this was like the Superbowl because he does it on the first play, like right out of the gate and Jim Nance can't believe it. He's gone.
1:09:41 Bill Simmons? How many times can he do this?
1:09:42 Speaker 03 Just don't kick it to him. Kick to Hester. Oh, that's great.
1:09:47 Bill Simmons? Bev smoking I had for UCR.
1:09:49 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:09:51 Bill Simmons? A positive spin for the most part of being a landlord. Usually landlords in movies are evil people.
1:09:57 Chris Ryan? Landlords. Yeah.
1:09:58 Bill Simmons? They, like they're as characters. You're just like, ah, the fucking landlord or he's creepy or he's spying on them.
1:10:03 Speaker 03 It's like a stepmother. It's always evil. Yeah.
1:10:06 Bill Simmons? Tippi Hedren as Flor- uh, Tippi Hedren as, uh, Florence Peters.
1:10:10 Chris Ryan? And that's Melanie Griffith's mom.
1:10:11 Bill Simmons? Melanie Griffith's real life mom. And then I have, uh, for what's age the best, this exchange. Oh, that's a great idea, Patty. You're pregnant with a blown knee. My knee's fine and I don't have to be pregnant.
1:10:24 Speaker 03 Ooh.
1:10:25 Bill Simmons? That's in the script.
1:10:26 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:10:28 Chris Ryan? But also like-
1:10:29 Bill Simmons? Unbelievable.
1:10:29 Chris Ryan? Patty threatening to go pro again in equestrian riding, like, what kind of money are we talking? She gonna make the mortgage?
1:10:38 Bill Simmons? The Nationals are coming up.
1:10:41 Chris Ryan? You don't know, it could be an Olympic sport any year now.
1:10:46 Bill Simmons? The Steven Seagal shitting on himself award for most unbelievable anecdote from the actual film shoot.
1:10:52 Bill Simmons? Kyle alluded to this earlier. Look, this is on the internet, not positive it's true, but I'm gonna pass it along anyway, cuz it's great. Modine stated during her presentation at the New York Film Academy that he experienced significant difficulty working with Melanie Griffith. He noted her frequent complaints regarding her menstrual cycle as a primary memory of their professional interaction. I don't know if that's true or not, it's so fucking weird that I just am passing along, not judging.
1:11:16 Chris Ryan? As the other side of it, that's amazing is that around when Melanie Griffith was shooting Bonfire of the Vanities-
1:11:23 Bill Simmons? Okay.
1:11:23 Chris Ryan? She complained openly about how difficult the production Pacific Heights was. Do you know how fucked up Pacific Heights must have been to have been complaining about it during making Bonfire of the Vanities?
1:11:33 Bill Simmons? What happened during this movie? And then Keaton's like-
1:11:36 Chris Ryan? That's like World War II.
1:11:37 Bill Simmons? "Keaton's out there, I'm not getting along with Melanie Griffith."
1:11:41 Speaker 03 Did he say that quote about the menstrual cycle, like, in character as Drake Goodman? Like, that's something that he would say.
1:11:48 Bill Simmons? I hope that's not true, maybe it's not true, I'm gonna pass it along. Just for comedy's sake, that's it.
1:11:53 Speaker 03 Sure.
1:11:54 Bill Simmons? Again, the Steven Seagal category is like, we don't know if that happened where he shit on himself-
1:11:58 Speaker 03 That's our guy.
1:11:59 Bill Simmons? But we pass it along. We're gonna take one more break, and then we do Great Shot Gordo.
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1:13:19 Bill Simmons? Great shot Gordo award, what do you have, C.R.? Most cinematic shot?
1:13:22 Chris Ryan? Yeah, so I've got Drake dropping his mail in the mailbox and then the curtain subtly opening behind him, but I'd like to introduce a wrinkle to this category today. And it's called "Pass the Settle Down Juice, We've Got a Thirsty Director Award."
1:13:35 Speaker 03 Yes, do it. I know what it is.
1:13:37 Chris Ryan? The random 360 dolly shot of Patty and the lawyer having a pretty normal conversation. And when Laurie Metcalf and Melanie Griffith are just like, "Yeah, well, this guy is gonna try and get you out of the house, because that's what he does. He tries to win." And meanwhile, the fucking camera is going around and around. Like, it's like they just found Jake LaMotta there. It's really...
1:13:58 Bill Simmons? You love Settle Down Juice? That's a good one. I like that.
1:14:00 Speaker 03 I have this written down, that if one of these guys chooses the 360 shot for the Great Shot Gordo, we're gonna fight. I hate that shot. I feel like I'm on a carnival ride. I get sick. And they're treating this banal conversation like it's a Pacino in the ocean in The Insider, like just screaming into the phone. It's like, the drama doesn't match the shot. Easy, easy.
1:14:20 Bill Simmons? The only time it works is when Keaton's flipping out at the end with the hotel manager, because he's flipping out and they start moving around. But I agree, the other one didn't work. I had the ice cube falling in the hotel glass. I thought it was a really good one, where it flips and she's going out the door. It's just, I was impressed. Ches Walkwell, Brock Laners Award, Best Character Name, Carter Hayes?
1:14:42 Chris Ryan? No, you guys gotta dig.
1:14:43 Bill Simmons? Drake Goodman?
1:14:43 Chris Ryan? You gotta dig deeper here, guys.
1:14:45 Bill Simmons? What do you got?
1:14:45 Speaker 03 What do you got, Chris?
1:14:46 Chris Ryan? Court-appointed locksmith Manfred Bagel?
1:14:49 Speaker 03 Oh, come on. That's his name?
1:14:52 Chris Ryan? Imagine this guy's name is Hyun Zell, that's the actor. And he's been in a bunch of Woody Allen movies or whatever, but you think he's like, gets a call and they're like,
1:15:00 Speaker 03 Incredible.
1:15:00 Chris Ryan? "Hi, we need you to come play a court-appointed locksmith." And he's like, "Ah, for Christ's sakes, I don't know." And they're like, "His name is Manfred Bagel." And he's like,
1:15:09 Speaker 03 I'm in.
1:15:09 Chris Ryan? "I'm there. What's my call time?"
1:15:11 Bill Simmons? What, that guy's nickname was Ungin? Or everything?
1:15:15 Speaker 03 The screenwriter was definitely eating a bagel when he wrote that character's name.
1:15:19 Chris Ryan? Yeah, Manfred, uh, Bagel.
1:15:21 Bill Simmons? Well, there's something in the thing where they say Patty's last name a couple of times in the movie, and then in the credits, it's a different last name.
1:15:26 Chris Ryan? Oh, for real?
1:15:27 Bill Simmons? Which I assume is just an oversight.
1:15:29 Speaker 03 Well, wait a second, hold on. Is it possible that his name is Bagel because he deals with locks?
1:15:33 Chris Ryan? Maybe.
1:15:35 Bill Simmons? Oh, it's like a nickname. Interesting.
1:15:36 Speaker 03 Yeah, locks.
1:15:37 Chris Ryan? But they, like, the marshal is very, like, official about, like, he's like,
1:15:42 Speaker 03 Very official.
1:15:42 Chris Ryan? "Court-appointed locksmith, Manfred Bagel."
1:15:46 Speaker 03 He does everything.
1:15:47 Bill Simmons? Kid Cudi's "Said Happened" is the word, best needle drop. Go ahead, Kyle.
1:15:51 Speaker 03 Well, I already mentioned Soundgarden. There's an awesome part where when Drake gets back to the house and the car is being taken apart, and there's just this crazy heavy metal playing.
1:15:59 Bill Simmons? Yeah.
1:16:00 Speaker 03 I want to shout out to a band called Hollows Eve, an 80s thrash band from Atlanta, who plays "Lethal Tendencies," and it makes Drake even madder. It's like a trap that he walks in, that metal song, which, by the way, I know that song kind of music pretty well. I literally downloaded Shazam and held it to my TV because I couldn't find out what song that was. And it's like, oh, easy, "Lethal Tendencies," "Hollows Eve," got it.
1:16:20 Chris Ryan? My wife has been doing that to, like, random trance songs that are on, like, off-cameras.
1:16:25 Speaker 03 Oh, really?
1:16:25 Chris Ryan? She's like, "What is this?" And I'm like, "It's like, literally muzak. What are you doing?"
1:16:30 Bill Simmons? I wrote down, this is for later, but did this movie create grunge music, CR?
1:16:33 Chris Ryan? No, but that's a good, good bit.
1:16:35 Bill Simmons? Drake Goodman listed in Soundgarden, was that it?
1:16:38 Chris Ryan? This should be even your hottest take.
1:16:39 Bill Simmons? That was Ground Zero?
1:16:41 Chris Ryan? He's, he is, you could tell he's starting to explore, like, "I've got a scarf on," like, ironically.
1:16:46 Speaker 03 Yeah.
1:16:47 Bill Simmons? I think they moved to Seattle.
1:16:48 Chris Ryan? You're probably right.
1:16:49 Bill Simmons? And they really get into this.
1:16:50 Speaker 03 Well, Soundgarden, what, a year later, they're playing "Birth Ritual" on singles?
1:16:53 Bill Simmons? Yeah.
1:16:53 Speaker 03 Like, it's, they just beat it.
1:16:56 Bill Simmons? Dennis Thies, Benihana Award for scene stealing location, and the Amanda Dobbins Award for best piece of real estate, um, where this house was.
1:17:02 Chris Ryan? Do you think this house is a good piece of real estate?
1:17:05 Bill Simmons? I like that it's at the top of the hill like that.
1:17:08 Speaker 03 Corner lot, too.
1:17:09 Bill Simmons? I think it's weird to live on those steep hills. Did you know anybody who did that?
1:17:13 Chris Ryan? No.
1:17:13 Bill Simmons? My buddies, uh, Bish and Mike and Hopper, when they lived there, they lived like in the middle of a slanted hill. I always thought it was just weird.
1:17:21 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:17:21 Bill Simmons? Um, I do want to mention the Beverly Hills house from The Lady, that his next mark, ten fourteen North Crescent. Thirty point three million on Redfin right now.
1:17:31 Speaker 03 Yeah.
1:17:31 Chris Ryan? How much?
1:17:32 Bill Simmons? Thirty point three.
1:17:33 Chris Ryan? Wow. I mean, it looks fucking huge.
1:17:34 Bill Simmons? It was massive. I immediately was.
1:17:37 Chris Ryan? That's the fucking big, that's the white whale for Carter. He must be like, if I get this one, it's all over. I just like, don't, so, so he's like in San Francisco trying to scam somebody into an apartment? And then he's also in LA trying to get a thirty million dollar.
1:17:48 Bill Simmons? We like to have two going.
1:17:49 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:17:50 Speaker 03 And he's in Palm Springs, too.
1:17:51 Chris Ryan? How did he pick his marks? Identity to go after her, right?
1:17:54 Bill Simmons? Yeah.
1:17:55 Chris Ryan? Okay.
1:17:56 Bill Simmons? It's like, you always want to have the next one going.
1:17:58 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:17:58 Bill Simmons? It's like Sam Presti, you got like two trades going at once. Could this movie have had a better title?
1:18:04 Chris Ryan? Well, it could. It would have been The Tenant, but Roman Polanski made that movie.
1:18:09 Bill Simmons? Broken Lease?
1:18:11 Chris Ryan? He never breaks it.
1:18:13 Speaker 03 I just, I think it's eviction. It's Pacific Heights, what percentage of the viewing populace even knows what Pacific Heights is in reference to? It's very vague.
1:18:22 Bill Simmons? Safety Deposit? Um, I have the winner. It's off of what Kyle just said. Eviction Quest.
1:18:29 Speaker 03 Oh, yeah.
1:18:31 Bill Simmons? Yeah. It's an unofficial eviction quest sequel. Eviction Quest.
1:18:34 Speaker 03 Eviction Quest.
1:18:35 Bill Simmons? Uh, see, are you have a flex category?
1:18:37 Chris Ryan? Uh, there's a Jesse Eisenberg, that's good. You should be proud of that right there. Don't worry if you don't make it any further award for the best line reading is when, uh, Keaton first meets Modine, and he's like, I spoke to your wife about the studio apartment. He goes, oh, my girlfriend. He's like, sorry. We don't want to rush anything, do we? It was a really good line reading, but my actual flex is to turn, turn it back to you guys. It's the Van Lathan, how would Van Lathan get out of this one? Usually this is sex adjacent. But.
1:19:06 Bill Simmons? Yeah.
1:19:06 Chris Ryan? How would you guys handle this?
1:19:08 Speaker 03 Okay.
1:19:08 Chris Ryan? Carrie comes to you and she's like, you know, it's gonna be lonely without Ben here. Let's get a tenant. Next thing you know, he's changed the locks. Like, what's your first move?
1:19:18 Bill Simmons? I think it's a lot easier now with, with camera phones.
1:19:22 Chris Ryan? Okay.
1:19:23 Bill Simmons? Like, part of the problem is they can't capture the drilling at 2:30 in the morning. And I think we also have more awareness of what to do as the landlord in this.
1:19:33 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:19:33 Bill Simmons? If they, if they're in there and they're not paying, I feel like you could immediately get the police in.
1:19:40 Bill Simmons? If he hasn't paid anything, and it didn't seem like he had a signed lease.
1:19:43 Chris Ryan? He signed the lease.
1:19:44 Speaker 03 He signed the lease, just no money.
1:19:45 Chris Ryan? It was all predicated on like, I'm gonna sign the lease, I'm gonna send you six months rent.
1:19:49 Speaker 03 That's why he was legally, that's why he had the rights to live there because he signed the lease.
1:19:53 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:19:53 Speaker 03 Mm-hmm.
1:19:54 Chris Ryan? And he was just like, oh, there's a problem, there's a mix-up at the bank.
1:19:56 Speaker 03 If, if you're Bill, I feel like you gotta bring in like a big dom security guy who just sits outside. Every time he comes home, he's like, hey, Carter, where's that money?
1:20:06 Bill Simmons? Yeah. This is, this is where I bring in Gahow.
1:20:09 Chris Ryan? Okay. So, Kyle, how would you?
1:20:11 Bill Simmons? Gahow, you gotta handle.
1:20:12 Chris Ryan? Oh, you gotta do that?
1:20:13 Bill Simmons? Gahow.
1:20:13 Chris Ryan? Where is Gahow?
1:20:15 Bill Simmons? Gahow's, Gahow's talking to the tenant right now.
1:20:18 Chris Ryan? Kyle, how would you handle it?
1:20:19 Speaker 03 Does the tenant, Chris, just indulge me in this, does the tenant work for a private trust?
1:20:23 Chris Ryan? It's one that he cannot disclose who the private trust is for, yeah.
1:20:28 Speaker 03 Uh, listen, the, the biggest idiot thing that they do, they wait way too long to call the police.
1:20:32 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:20:33 Speaker 03 The second Greg is slamming the door in your face, we gotta get the fucking cops here.
1:20:36 Bill Simmons? You need a record of feuding with the guy that you gotta then go forward with.
1:20:40 Speaker 03 Yeah. To answer your question, Chris, I would rather have like reptile pets in my house than have an actual renter. And so I, I don't think I'd be in this, but I'd call the police early if I did.
1:20:49 Chris Ryan? Here's my thing.
1:20:50 Speaker 03 Yeah, what do you got?
1:20:51 Chris Ryan? Kill them with kindness. Every night, down there with a six-pack of egg custard, being like, hey, Carter!
1:20:57 Chris Ryan? Just wanna know if you wanna come upstairs, Rick Ruscial's pitching. Giants are looking pretty good. Nope? Okay, see you tomorrow night. I'd be like Rick Moranis from Ghostbusters.
1:21:06 Bill Simmons? Rugby championships are on.
1:21:08 Chris Ryan? Hey, Carter, we're looking for a tenant for my rugby team. Nope? Yeah, no, okay, all right, well, I'll talk to you later, bud. I would just act like me and Carter were best friends.
1:21:19 Speaker 03 You know what you do, Chris? You you're gonna you're gonna have a Weber grill too and you can put some ribs on there out front. And Carter, you want some? Medium rare. Come out there. Perfect.
1:21:27 Chris Ryan? Bratz, Ronnie Loops looking real good this season, Carter. Bring Greg too. Screw it.
1:21:32 Bill Simmons? Well, the other move is when he's not there, you just figure out how to break into the place.
1:21:36 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:21:37 Bill Simmons? Which is a way better strategy than what he tried to do of turning turning the lights off and the power off and all that. That's like the one no, no, because now you're violating him. Now you're the bad guy.
1:21:46 Chris Ryan? Yeah. Couldn't you just get in, change the locks again? So then Keaton couldn't get back in?
1:21:49 Bill Simmons? You could.
1:21:50 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:21:50 Bill Simmons? And then you could say like, well, I don't lease agreement. What do you mean? He's never paid me. Butch's girlfriend award for weak link of the film. So you already did yours, Kyle.
1:22:00 Speaker 03 Yeah, the last scene, his death scene sucks, but you know what doesn't suck? Chris Ryan referencing Big Daddy Rick Rushell of the San Francisco Giants. I loved Rick Rushell. Gave up a whole run to Bo in the All-Star game.
1:22:12 Speaker 03 What do you got, Bill?
1:22:14 Bill Simmons? So Carter Carter Hayes, I have him as the best six inning starter ever as a villain in a movie. He can only throw 18 pitches. He looked unstoppable. He's basically, he's going through six. People are texting each other like you watching Carter Hayes right now?
1:22:30 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:22:31 Bill Simmons? 18 straight outs, 10 strikeouts, no walks. Like this guy's on fire. Fucking falls apart. In order, um, he fucks up and shoots Drake. I still don't understand. We talked about that.
1:22:43 Chris Ryan? He shot Drake and put the crowbar in his hand.
1:22:47 Bill Simmons? But why? What did that? What did that get him?
1:22:50 Chris Ryan? Uh, I think he's trying to drive Drake mad so that he is gone from the situation and he can take over the house.
1:22:56 Bill Simmons? Just kill him then.
1:22:57 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:22:58 Bill Simmons? I didn't understand though. He leaves the childhood photo behind. You're getting out of there. You have time to pack up, but you're leaving this incredible clue. He moves to LA and stupidly sends a postcard from his new hotel to his ex-girlfriend who's been looking for him, who hates him.
1:23:14 Chris Ryan? Yes.
1:23:15 Bill Simmons? Do that. And then he he becomes Drake Goodman in the hotel. Like, oh, that's your second guess after his Carter Hayes here? No. Hmm. I wonder if he stole Drake's identity. Is Drake Goodman here? He sure is. Room 1031. Um, I just, I thought he played this perfectly and then it just fell apart. It's a bummer.
1:23:33 Speaker 03 Yeah. Bill, I'm looking at like, like Mark Pryor for the Cubs in the Steve Bartman game. It just completely comes unglued. When, when Carter Hayes is sprinting down the Avenue of the Stars chasing a cab, I feel bad for him. That's beneath him as a starter. You gotta get him out of there.
1:23:48 Bill Simmons? Yeah, that's when he's, now he's like giving up nine earned runs. It's like, oh my God, this guy had a no hitter. His ERA is gonna go up. Um, did you have a weak link or no?
1:23:57 Chris Ryan? Uh, no, not really. I, I liked Laurie Metcalf's performance, but I think it would have been cool to have like a harder charging lawyer. Like a little bit more aggressive. Maybe he gets killed by Carter.
1:24:07 Bill Simmons? The Mallory Rubin Award I threw in for did this movie need a better sex scene? I'd take two more. I don't, I don't think this movie has enough sex in it.
1:24:15 Chris Ryan? No.
1:24:16 Bill Simmons? I, I really think they should have ramped it up.
1:24:18 Chris Ryan? Carter should have brought some, some gal home to the destroy department one night.
1:24:22 Bill Simmons? If you're gonna throw that in in the first three minutes, that can't be it.
1:24:27 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:24:28 Bill Simmons? Like you're trying to set a tone and then you, then you're a PG 13 after that.
1:24:31 Chris Ryan? Angela, trust me, this, the whole movie is gonna be like this.
1:24:34 Bill Simmons? Well, why do, it's an unanswerable, but why did she demand to take her name out of the credits? I thought that was weird.
1:24:41 Chris Ryan? I don't know.
1:24:41 Speaker 03 Yeah, unbilled. You know, like she's like Kevin Spacey in seven. It's very strange.
1:24:45 Bill Simmons? She's like the fourth lead of the movie, basically.
1:24:48 Speaker 03 But I, Bill, I, I zag on this actually. I, I actually, it's like, did this movie need a worse sex scene? Because that sex scene is so good, I'd rather stay out in the desert with the two of them than go and check out these guys in San Francisco. I'm more intrigued by them.
1:25:03 Chris Ryan? That's like the, like they're like out in white sands. Like I would love to know what was going on out there.
1:25:08 Bill Simmons? Yeah, that's pretty weird. What stage the worst?
1:25:13 Bill Simmons? I thought the first scene, just in general, is pretty bizarre. Like those guys come in and they beat him up, but not really. He's fine.
1:25:21 Speaker 03 It is French.
1:25:22 Bill Simmons? And what lesson did he learn? And like, why didn't they like break his arm? I, I didn't get that.
1:25:26 Chris Ryan? So are those people sent by the original Carter Hayes? Like those guys? Is the idea that he has stolen Carter Hayes's identity and now those guys are coming after him?
1:25:36 Speaker 03 But then he still won because he, he retained that apartment, it appears.
1:25:39 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:25:39 Bill Simmons? Does that scene need to be in the movie?
1:25:43 Chris Ryan? It's almost more interesting if he just shows up.
1:25:45 Speaker 03 It shows how desperate he is. It shows his lifestyle and it immediately gives you a little violence and sex. I kind of like the scene, actually, because it's confusing, but it tells him he's mysterious.
1:25:56 Bill Simmons? I would take more violence and maybe he shows up and his arms in a cast or something.
1:26:00 Chris Ryan? Remember the shot at the very beginning of the movie, there's like two guys driving on the road?
1:26:03 Bill Simmons? Yeah.
1:26:04 Speaker 03 Yeah, that's the guys with the baseball bat.
1:26:05 Chris Ryan? Oh, that's just the two guys.
1:26:06 Speaker 03 Yeah, they're going out to beat him up, yeah.
1:26:08 Bill Simmons? Um, the photo of him and his brother in a chimpanzee.
1:26:13 Chris Ryan? Mm-hmm.
1:26:13 Bill Simmons? What's going on there?
1:26:14 Chris Ryan? This is what's aged the worst?
1:26:16 Speaker 03 Yes.
1:26:17 Bill Simmons? What's going on there?
1:26:18 Speaker 03 I don't know. They look like they're on Neverland Ranch. It's a very strange photograph.
1:26:23 Bill Simmons? Johnny Charles, hold on, posed with the chip.
1:26:26 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:26:27 Bill Simmons? When have you ever been in a situation where you could take a photo of the chimpanzee?
1:26:31 Chris Ryan? At the end of the movie.
1:26:32 Bill Simmons? What is he, every which way but loose?
1:26:34 Chris Ryan? Carter's like, I have responsibilities. I have to take care of my brother. What is that about?
1:26:38 Bill Simmons? And his brother, it's established, took the estate and disowned him.
1:26:42 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:26:43 Bill Simmons? Um, I thought that, so that Shazam song you did, this is my other what's aged the worst. I just would have put in Dinosaur Jr. there. They're sitting right there. Let's get like a real band. They're not really famous yet. They need it.
1:26:57 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:26:58 Bill Simmons? You know, they have an album out that year. Well, it's just, I thought that could have worked. What did you have for what's aged the worst?
1:27:03 Chris Ryan? Uh, I think there's like some, some moments where Hans Zimmer is doing, we have to save the earth from an asteroid music. When it's just like, these two guys are just like nailing two by fours. I don't think it's that traumatic.
1:27:14 Bill Simmons? Yeah, Die Hard 2 turned it down.
1:27:16 Chris Ryan? And, um, I thought the combined income of a couple made up of a kite maker and a horse riding instructor doesn't even get to the 20% down for the 750K. So there must either have been a family nest egg in there. I'd like to know which one of them was spending it.
1:27:32 Speaker 03 Yep.
1:27:32 Chris Ryan? Um, and.
1:27:33 Bill Simmons? By the way, that would have been a good yuppie angle of like somebody saying, I don't want to have to ask my mom for money.
1:27:38 Chris Ryan? I mean, if you ask me, Drake Goodman screams, family of lawyers, he's going his own way, making kites.
1:27:45 Bill Simmons? What happened to Drake? I heard he graduated from Harvard.
1:27:50 Bill Simmons? So, you know, kites are really taking off right now. Drake thought this luxury kite business, oh, thought he was gonna be an attorney.
1:27:59 Speaker 03 No, it's going on the kite route, big kite company. Kite's probably a seasonal business too.
1:28:04 Bill Simmons? He loves kites.
1:28:05 Chris Ryan? He's gonna do another round of seed investing.
1:28:08 Bill Simmons? If you're in for the series B, let me know. What do you have for what stage to where is anything, Kyle?
1:28:14 Speaker 03 I got a young woman named Patty, you just don't see that anymore.
1:28:17 Bill Simmons? Yeah.
1:28:19 Speaker 03 I hate when Realtor will bring you to a place that is over your stated price range. I think it's dirty pool, it happens here.
1:28:24 Bill Simmons? Yeah.
1:28:24 Speaker 03 But most importantly, guys, is it entirely necessary to have Mr. Watanabe doing tai chi in the rain in front of the bonsai trees?
1:28:35 Chris Ryan? It's a pretty casually racist movie.
1:28:36 Speaker 03 What are we doing? The only thing that's missing is that in the final scene, when they're fighting Carter, Watanabe comes back and does karate and does a kick. And it's like 1990, we get it, the man is Japanese, we don't need the tai chi in the bonsai trees. It's a little heavy of that.
1:28:51 Chris Ryan? And him being like, I will pay you back somehow. And it's like, how about?
1:28:54 Speaker 03 And they're all bowing, they're constantly bowing.
1:28:56 Chris Ryan? This is a fucking terrible situation, I'm out of here, try and sue me.
1:28:59 Bill Simmons? I've made you some sushi. Yeah, what else could he have done that would have been? Yeah, I didn't, I didn't even clock that, how did I not have that in my notes?
1:29:07 Speaker 03 Very heavy handed. There's practically a gong there, it's just, come on, guys, we get it, he's Japanese.
1:29:13 Bill Simmons? Hans Gruber scale villain ranking, Carter Hayes, I think 8.0.
1:29:17 Chris Ryan? He's pretty high up there. I mean, he's a very, he's a terrifying what if, like, what if this happened to you?
1:29:23 Bill Simmons? What do you got, Kyle?
1:29:24 Speaker 03 With 10 being Hans Gruber and one being the passenger 57 guy, here's what hurts, here's what hurts Carter.
1:29:29 Bill Simmons? And three toy soldiers?
1:29:31 Speaker 03 Toy soldiers is three, maybe two.
1:29:32 Bill Simmons? Two sudden death?
1:29:34 Speaker 03 Carter doesn't kill anybody in the movie, which is kind of unusual. And he doesn't give us the big ol', here is my manifesto.
1:29:43 Bill Simmons? No.
1:29:43 Speaker 03 The system is working against me and I will, like, he does a little with my, I gotta take care of my brother, but a tenant of the Gruber scales, you gotta, you gotta cook for a while and just tell everybody you're all about.
1:29:53 Bill Simmons? So you're one monologue short.
1:29:55 Speaker 03 Yeah, I have him, I love the character, but on this particular scale, he's at best a six.
1:29:59 Chris Ryan? I liked it during that speech where he's like, you liked it, didn't you? Like living dangerously.
1:30:05 Bill Simmons? Ruffel Hannah Ribbene Partridge over acting award. We don't even need to really go into.
1:30:09 Speaker 03 So what about here?
1:30:13 Speaker 04 I had Modine five Budweiser drunk acting.
1:30:17 Speaker 03 Yeah.
1:30:17 Bill Simmons? Yeah, it's all the candidate. If we did it as Oscars and there were five nominees, it's like, and Matthew Modine. And Matthew Modine, and we'd just be five different clips.
1:30:27 Speaker 03 When he turns off the utilities and does that dance, it's like the worst end zone dance you've ever seen that like, an offensive lineman picks up a fumble and does one. It's, I cannot believe they chose to keep that in the movie, but they did.
1:30:37 Bill Simmons? Kyle, what's your flex category?
1:30:39 Speaker 03 Um, I have a new category.
1:30:42 Bill Simmons? Oh.
1:30:43 Speaker 03 I have the Pacific Heights Ice Cube Award for Excellence in Intimacy Coordination. That move that they do to start it in which Beverly D'Angelo takes an ice cube out of the glass into her mouth, passes it directly to Carter Hayes' mouth. He then takes it and rubs it all over her back and then she goes, so gentle. Like that is an unbelievable thrilling sequence. And my question to you guys, did it say in the script, she removes the ice, tongues it into his mouth?
1:31:14 Speaker 04 Adlib?
1:31:15 Speaker 03 Or is this like two great artists?
1:31:16 Speaker 04 Just like, let's just explore the studio space.
1:31:17 Speaker 03 Like, you know what? Long day on the set. Let's make, let's make something happen here. And there's two people whose reactions I want to that scene. One is Chevy Chase, who watched that scene. He's like, Alan! And he probably pushed for that shit in Vegas vacation. And then I want Pacino's reaction, which I guarantee was, ooh ha! And he like wanted her number and eventually they end up together. Cause that is so sexy. And I just, I love that they went for that.
1:31:40 Bill Simmons? Baby, you are on fire. Fire!
1:31:43 Speaker 04 It's kind of the Peter North award a little bit. Most effort put into a scene.
1:31:46 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:31:46 Bill Simmons? Great. Oh, yeah.
1:31:47 Speaker 03 Also, absolutely.
1:31:48 Speaker 04 The ice cube exchanges is against gravity, which is even more impressive. It doesn't go down from the top to the bottom.
1:31:54 Speaker 03 Yes, correct.
1:31:54 Speaker 04 It goes up against gravity. Very impressive.
1:31:56 Chris Ryan? Impressive stuff.
1:31:57 Speaker 03 There's some suction from the pool.
1:31:58 Speaker 04 Yeah.
1:31:59 Bill Simmons? I think it's all ad libbed. I think this is a PG 13 movie and, and.
1:32:04 Speaker 04 Expletions just put off menu.
1:32:06 Bill Simmons? Yeah, let's fuck around here.
1:32:08 Speaker 03 Let's try something. Here, let's just roll with it. Just keep rolling. Let's do this. And it's just awesome. It's very sexy.
1:32:12 Bill Simmons? So what'd you call that? The Pacific Heights?
1:32:14 Speaker 03 The Pacific Heights Ice Cube Award for Excellence in Intimacy Coordination.
1:32:18 Bill Simmons? Not bad. I'm gonna add it. The CR thinks Luke Wilson could have been Harrison Ford hottest take award.
1:32:23 Chris Ryan? I didn't really have one, except for maybe like, I think Patty should have given like, five minutes of thought to sticking with Carter and becoming the new Anne.
1:32:30 Speaker 03 Yeah, that's pretty hot.
1:32:32 Chris Ryan? First of all, he's, he shows that he's willing to get his hands dirty when it comes to remo renovations and demolitions.
1:32:37 Bill Simmons? Yeah.
1:32:37 Chris Ryan? And also like, this is a guy with plans and ambition. He's not content just sitting around doing kite making. It's pretty good.
1:32:45 Speaker 03 I like that your pivot now is that people should stay with the crazy person.
1:32:47 Chris Ryan? Yeah. That was my idea. It seems like DeMornay's just got it all figured out.
1:32:52 Bill Simmons? Should we be worried that CR has sided with the From Hell character in every movie?
1:32:56 Chris Ryan? It's called hottest take. Come on.
1:32:59 Bill Simmons? I have, uh, I think I learned more about landlord tenant rights from this movie than any human being in my life, um, any story.
1:33:10 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:33:10 Bill Simmons? I, I think this movie was incredibly impactful and doesn't get its just due.
1:33:16 Bill Simmons? I can't think of another situation, um, movie, TV, real life, that taught me more than this did in 102 minutes. And that's it. What do you got, Kyle?
1:33:26 Speaker 03 It's incredible. They, they, once they get in, they have the right to due process and that's expensive and long. And I completely agree with you. I would watch this to learn about that exact crime. Mine is really close to Chris's. This is a better movie if the huge twist at the end is that Carter and Drake are working together.
1:33:46 Chris Ryan? Ooh.
1:33:48 Speaker 03 And when Melanie's up in the hotel room and she's flipping through the documents, she comes across her boyfriend's face.
1:33:52 Bill Simmons? A photo them together?
1:33:53 Speaker 03 And.
1:33:54 Chris Ryan? He's the brother.
1:33:55 Speaker 03 Yes. His name is not Drake Goodman. He's been, and they're been working on this for months. Remember, they're not married and they make a point of saying they're not married like five or six different times. So this is relatively new and I think that they're in cahoots and in tandem. The fight was kind of staged. I think Drake Goodman.
1:34:12 Chris Ryan? Twice in the arm. Yeah.
1:34:13 Speaker 03 Yeah, twice in the arm. I think they, Drake Goodman caused the miscarriage, like all kinds of things, but the terror in her face when she finds out, oh my God, they're in on it together. That's a better movie.
1:34:25 Bill Simmons? You could even have, he decides he's gonna be a luxury kite maker as to throw people off the scent.
1:34:31 Chris Ryan? And Carter's like, no one will ever believe that.
1:34:35 Bill Simmons? And you play rugby? This is crazy. Will people believe this? That's really good. She could have held the photo up and been like.
1:34:41 Speaker 03 Yes.
1:34:43 Bill Simmons? Um, casting what ifs, I only have one. Christopher Reeve really wanted to be Carter Hayes, lobbied the director and uh, sadly for Christopher Reeve, Keaton was Batman and wanted to be in the movie and that was a wrap for Christopher Reeve.
1:34:57 Speaker 03 So they, they wanted.
1:34:58 Bill Simmons? I don't see Christopher Reeve in this movie.
1:35:00 Speaker 03 They wanted Superman or Batman. Like, that's pretty cool.
1:35:06 Bill Simmons? Amazing two choices. Who would have been the third person?
1:35:09 Speaker 03 Yeah, I heard Tobey Maguire wanted to do it, but he was like 10 years old. So they couldn't.
1:35:13 Bill Simmons? Well, look at the best that guy category. It's fucking stacked.
1:35:18 Chris Ryan? It is.
1:35:18 Speaker 03 Yeah, it is. Let's go.
1:35:18 Bill Simmons? We have Dan Hedaya.
1:35:21 Speaker 03 One scene.
1:35:22 Bill Simmons? Mrs. Watanabe, played by Nobu McCarthy, Mr. Miyagi's long lost love in Karate Kid 2.
1:35:30 Bill Simmons? You Karate Kid, you KK 2 guy, Kyle?
1:35:32 Speaker 03 Hell yes, I am. Beautiful story. The instruments at the end, I love it. Fortune. I'm into it.
1:35:37 Bill Simmons? Daniel-san, this time enough for points for life.
1:35:40 Speaker 03 Yep.
1:35:41 Bill Simmons? Carl Lumbray.
1:35:42 Chris Ryan? Lumley.
1:35:43 Bill Simmons? Carl Lumley. Um, Cagney and Lacey, cast member?
1:35:48 Bill Simmons? Also played Bobby Seal in Chicago 7.
1:35:50 Chris Ryan? Some of the Falcon and the Winter Soldier stuff, yeah.
1:35:53 Bill Simmons? Jerry Harden, playing Bennett Fidlow. You might know him from X-Files and The Firm?
1:35:59 Bill Simmons? And then you mentioned Tracy Walters, the cockroach exterminator. Sadly, none of these people win.
1:36:03 Chris Ryan? I gotta go Dorian Harwood.
1:36:06 Bill Simmons? I don't know if he's a that guy. I think he was famous at one point.
1:36:09 Speaker 03 Which guy is he, Chris?
1:36:10 Chris Ryan? He's uh.
1:36:11 Bill Simmons? He's the one buddy that he has.
1:36:12 Chris Ryan? He's the one buddy he has and.
1:36:14 Bill Simmons? That's pretty good, though. Craig does.
1:36:15 Chris Ryan? He's also, I have him winning because he played eight ball in Full Metal Jacket.
1:36:19 Speaker 03 Ah.
1:36:20 Chris Ryan? So he and Modine were in the same squad in Full Metal Jacket.
1:36:22 Bill Simmons? Oh, that's good.
1:36:23 Speaker 03 Mine's not on the list either, though.
1:36:25 Bill Simmons? I have two more.
1:36:26 Speaker 03 Okay, go. Do it, do it, do it.
1:36:28 Bill Simmons? Nicholas Pryor is the hotel manager. You know him as the risky business dad and more importantly Chancellor Arnold from 90210. My winner is Luca Berkavici.
1:36:37 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:36:38 Bill Simmons? Who played a muzzin in American Flyers with Kevin Costner, the bad guy biker. And is just a home run in that movie and then really never kind of bounced around after that.
1:36:49 Chris Ryan? This is a good time to ask, what is Greg's utility here? Like Carter can't do that, that demolition himself?
1:36:56 Bill Simmons? He's helping out with ruining the apartment for no reason.
1:36:59 Chris Ryan? Carter needed a hand doing that? It's a studio apartment.
1:37:02 Bill Simmons? Needed some help.
1:37:03 Chris Ryan? Okay.
1:37:04 Bill Simmons? What did you have Kyle?
1:37:06 Speaker 03 I had Hal Landon Jr. When they go and do the locksmith that finally get in. The officer there with the pattern baldness, he's Ted's dad from Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure. And that's like the only thing I've ever seen him in. Deputy Van Halen, there is one scene in this, the year later. That was my guy, but these are a lot of excellent choices.
1:37:25 Bill Simmons? Really, really loaded category. I think my favorite is probably Mr. Miyagi's long lost love in Karate Kid.
1:37:30 Speaker 03 I did too.
1:37:32 Bill Simmons? You know, Sato kind of fucked, fucked up their relationship, I felt like.
1:37:40 Bill Simmons? Dion Waiters award. I can offer you Beverly D'Angelo, the Watanabe's or the cockroach exterminator.
1:37:45 Chris Ryan? I'll do it, I'll do a Bev.
1:37:47 Bill Simmons? Okay, Bev.
1:37:47 Speaker 03 Yeah, she, she takes it all.
1:37:49 Bill Simmons? Recasting couch director city. I can offer you young Denzel Washington as the tenant that got turned down.
1:37:55 Chris Ryan? Hmm.
1:37:56 Bill Simmons? Right in his range.
1:37:57 Chris Ryan? I think 1990 is a little, he's.
1:37:59 Bill Simmons? Is he famous at that point?
1:38:00 Chris Ryan? That's post glory, yeah.
1:38:03 Bill Simmons? Yeah, alright.
1:38:04 Speaker 03 How about Sam Jackson?
1:38:05 Bill Simmons? Oh, oh.
1:38:07 Speaker 03 90 mark, sure. Yeah.
1:38:10 Bill Simmons? Uh, I have De Palma for this though.
1:38:11 Chris Ryan? Yeah, you're right.
1:38:12 Bill Simmons? I think De Palma doing Pacific Heights would have been fucking awesome. I'm just, I can't stop staring at Cigal's shirt.
1:38:20 Chris Ryan? It's really, it is distracting.
1:38:21 Bill Simmons? It's really great.
1:38:22 Speaker 03 These two are so happy to be in the portrait.
1:38:25 Chris Ryan? They're together watching the Chicago Bulls who Kyle has to the left of him.
1:38:30 Speaker 03 You never thought you needed Toni Kukoc and Mason Storm together, but we got them.
1:38:34 Bill Simmons? Two big threes in a row. Half assed in research, Carter Hayes drives a 1977 Porsche 911 Carrera Targa.
1:38:43 Speaker 03 Mm-hmm.
1:38:44 Bill Simmons? It's a fucking elite car.
1:38:45 Chris Ryan? It's not really research, it's just respect.
1:38:46 Bill Simmons? It's just an elite, elite car. Uh, this is my favorite. I was researching Melanie Griffith. Joanne Woodward told a seventeen year old Melanie on the set of The Drowning Pool that her goals were to marry a movie star, have beautiful babies, and win an Oscar. And she did all three. Melanie said she adopted the goals for herself. She married a movie star and had beautiful babies, but never won the Oscar.
1:39:12 Chris Ryan? Well, it's never too late.
1:39:13 Bill Simmons? They'd get nominated.
1:39:13 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:39:15 Bill Simmons? Joanne Woodward. Who didn't? You have a moment, a Joanne Woodward moment like that with anyone, CR?
1:39:20 Chris Ryan? Like where somebody passes along?
1:39:21 Bill Simmons? Like James Corden's like, who are my three goals? I'm gonna host a terrible World Cup soccer show. Wanna have my own late night show?
1:39:31 Chris Ryan? Yeah. What have I done of those?
1:39:34 Bill Simmons? I don't know, I'm just...
1:39:40 Bill Simmons? Apex Mountain, Keaton?
1:39:43 Chris Ryan? Yeah, well, this is it.
1:39:43 Bill Simmons? I'm gonna say yes.
1:39:45 Speaker 03 Yeah, I think it is too.
1:39:46 Chris Ryan? Although it's an example of Apex Mountain being a poison chalice. Sometimes like you make the wrong move from the apex, you know?
1:39:52 Speaker 03 For sure.
1:39:53 Bill Simmons? Or the right move.
1:39:54 Chris Ryan? For sure.
1:39:55 Bill Simmons? Melanie Griffith, no. Matthew Modine?
1:40:01 Chris Ryan? I think Full Metal Jacket.
1:40:02 Bill Simmons? Yeah.
1:40:02 Speaker 03 I think it's the Kubrick lead, lead in the Kubrick movie, you gotta do that, yeah.
1:40:06 Bill Simmons? Ominously playing with a razor? Has it ever been done better?
1:40:10 Speaker 03 Um, I think of Kevin Spacey cutting his fingertips off at seven. And then of course Paulie slicing the garlic, but it's close.
1:40:18 Chris Ryan? Boy, those are two really good razor, razor shouts.
1:40:21 Bill Simmons? Better creepy cockroach scene?
1:40:26 Chris Ryan? I don't know, cockroach is notoriously difficult to work with on film sets.
1:40:29 Speaker 03 What's that stupid movie, Joe's Apartment, right? Isn't Jerry O'Connell, isn't that a cockroach based movie?
1:40:35 Chris Ryan? Yes.
1:40:36 Bill Simmons? I must did this as my hottest takes. Cockroaches, kinda overrated. Seems super scary in a movie, but if you have to, they can't, they can't bite. They're just kinda creepy.
1:40:44 Speaker 03 I think, I think they're like the scariest thing in the world. I'd rather kill myself.
1:40:47 Bill Simmons? Well, they're scary in both.
1:40:48 Speaker 03 If I was Mr. Watanabe, I would've just offed myself a second.
1:40:50 Chris Ryan? So you're more scared of roaches than mice? I don't, I-
1:40:54 Bill Simmons? I think rats are way more scary than cockroaches.
1:40:56 Speaker 03 Yeah.
1:40:57 Chris Ryan? No, roaches, they're infinite and like they'll never go away. They just breed in your pipes. They've completely freaked me out. And a lot of them can fly, which people don't know. I've had a few roaches in my life, never like an infestation, but- I hate him.
1:41:11 Bill Simmons? We had termites in, uh, our first LA place and, uh,
1:41:15 Speaker 03 Oh, yeah?
1:41:16 Bill Simmons? That sucked.
1:41:17 Speaker 03 Did you have to tent it?
1:41:18 Bill Simmons? That was bad.
1:41:18 Chris Ryan? Did you have to tent it?
1:41:19 Bill Simmons? They, they, they just, it's like out of a movie. They start multiplying. You see the wings. It fucking sucks.
1:41:25 Chris Ryan? If Spencer Pratt was like, we're getting rid of the roaches, he would have had my vote.
1:41:30 Bill Simmons? That's all I had to do. Uh,
1:41:32 Speaker 03 Look at you, Craig.
1:41:33 Bill Simmons? San Francisco movie houses, no. We've done this before. Is it Mrs. Doubtfire?
1:41:39 Chris Ryan? Uh, oh, mov- movie houses. Uh, yeah. Doubtfire and, and like the stuff in Basic Instinct, although,
1:41:46 Speaker 03 And I think Full House on TV. That one's, people want to take pictures in front of that.
1:41:50 Bill Simmons? Porsche nine eleven career target, yes, for seventy seven. Evil tenants of movies, hundred percent. Uh, annoying yuppies in a movie, maybe?
1:41:58 Chris Ryan? No.
1:41:59 Bill Simmons? And then casual nineties racism, sadly, no. Uh, okay. Cruise? Or Hanks?
1:42:06 Chris Ryan? A cruise has got to play Carter. This is a midgrader.
1:42:09 Speaker 03 That's it. I want it.
1:42:11 Chris Ryan? I have responsibilities, Patty.
1:42:14 Bill Simmons? Cruise would have said no until they showed him the last scene. So he's gonna run out of the JW mirror at a full speed. He's like, what?
1:42:23 Chris Ryan? This would have been, Cruise would have been like, this is like my Ripley. This is great.
1:42:26 Bill Simmons? Yeah.
1:42:27 Speaker 03 Cruise would have caught them if he was running out of the, on the Avenue of the Stars. Also, Cruise doing The Ice Cube scene? Ice Cube scene with D'Angelo.
1:42:35 Chris Ryan? Awesome.
1:42:36 Speaker 03 This is the same year that he did Days of Thunder and is taking a Sweet and Low packet up Nicole Kidman's thigh on the inside of it. It's like, those are brother and sister scenes. I think he could have done it.
1:42:46 Bill Simmons? He could have done half Ice Cube followed by just them laughing for twenty seconds straight.
1:42:51 Chris Ryan? There's also just a ton of cocktail, you know, like he could have thrown the champagne glass in the air and caught it, you know?
1:42:56 Bill Simmons? Yeah. What would have been Cruise's skill for this? The nail gun? Like, I worked with a nail gun for two months.
1:43:01 Chris Ryan? No, I think it's mimicry. I think it's becoming different people to like steal their identities.
1:43:06 Speaker 03 That razor blade too. He's working that thing for a long time.
1:43:08 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:43:09 Speaker 03 Yeah. But he has the smoke.
1:43:10 Chris Ryan? The cockroach crawling on Keaton's fingers. Cruise would have gotten into that.
1:43:13 Bill Simmons? Yeah.
1:43:13 Speaker 03 Yeah, that's good.
1:43:15 Bill Simmons? Uh, the Rose from Titanic award for character who's sneaky sucks. I don't know. Is Drake Goodman qualifier or does he openly suck?
1:43:22 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:43:22 Bill Simmons? Yeah, he openly sucks, right? All right, cross that up. Um, best name for a movie from a racehorse? Best name from movie for a racehorse. Evil tenant?
1:43:31 Chris Ryan? Sure.
1:43:32 Bill Simmons? I think it's a really good Kentucky Derby name.
1:43:35 Chris Ryan? Jim Danforth?
1:43:36 Bill Simmons? Not a great. Jim Danforth, that is good.
1:43:37 Speaker 03 Unless you want to go with kite company. It's just, it flies.
1:43:40 Bill Simmons? Luxury kite company.
1:43:43 Bill Simmons? Hey, we don't get to do this too often.
1:43:45 Speaker 03 Yeah.
1:43:47 Bill Simmons? Really, it's for CR. The Dennis Peck relationship test.
1:43:51 Speaker 03 Go on.
1:43:51 Bill Simmons? Could Dennis have broken up the main relationship?
1:43:54 Chris Ryan? No, but I'll tell you what, Dennis would have gotten that guy out of the fucking apartment.
1:44:00 Chris Ryan? They just needed a dirtier cop. That would have been the easiest way to do this. It's just like, get a cop who's like, I don't give a shit what it says, you're out of here.
1:44:07 Bill Simmons? I think Dennis comes over. Uh, the guy's at the kite company job. And what was her name in this? Patty?
1:44:15 Chris Ryan? Patty.
1:44:16 Bill Simmons? Can't get that guy out, huh? What's your guy, what's your, what's your boyfriend do?
1:44:21 Bill Simmons? Luxury kite company, huh? What are you doing now? Want to get a drink?
1:44:24 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:44:25 Speaker 03 Yeah.
1:44:25 Bill Simmons? He's in. I think he's in with Patty in two hours. You're like to ride horses. Picking nits. We did a lot of these. Carter moves in without a rental agreement. Why didn't Drake just open the door with his keys and kick this fucking asshole out before?
1:44:39 Chris Ryan? I think the first thing he does is change the locks.
1:44:41 Bill Simmons? Open the key, open the door. Um, here's an underrated one for picking nits.
1:44:46 Speaker 03 Yeah.
1:44:46 Bill Simmons? Anytime in a movie or TV show, somebody thinks a cat's gonna be good luck?
1:44:50 Speaker 03 Oh, yeah.
1:44:52 Bill Simmons? Never good luck.
1:44:53 Chris Ryan? Just, just, I don't think I've ever seen a thriller where a cat is introduced, but it's like, don't worry about it.
1:44:59 Speaker 04 Famously bad luck, cats.
1:45:01 Bill Simmons? Yeah, like.
1:45:02 Speaker 04 Black, black cats are.
1:45:03 Bill Simmons? You moved to No Place With Liz. If a cat was just outside the door and was like, I brought, I brought this cat in, it would be good luck. You'd be like, get that fucking cat out of here.
1:45:11 Chris Ryan? No. My wife and I currently have a bedding pool on the cat in the Cape Fear TV show.
1:45:15 Speaker 03 Oh.
1:45:16 Chris Ryan? Yeah, peanut butter. Just keep sitting there on the counter. I'm like.
1:45:19 Bill Simmons? Yeah, peanut butter's done.
1:45:22 Bill Simmons? Um.
1:45:24 Bill Simmons? Carter Hayes' strategy is he's gonna drive them into foreclosure and pick up the property?
1:45:31 Speaker 03 We think.
1:45:31 Bill Simmons? And get it for cheaper?
1:45:33 Chris Ryan? I think that there was a twofold thing. I think it was there's the initial like, I'm gonna drive these people out and then receive property as like my civil like settlement. And then when that seems like it's not gonna work.
1:45:46 Bill Simmons? He just shoots Drake.
1:45:47 Chris Ryan? Uh, I think he steals his identity.
1:45:49 Bill Simmons? Takes his identity, okay. And then, how did they restore the house the second time after they'd been cleaned out?
1:45:53 Speaker 03 Good call.
1:45:54 Bill Simmons? And they're living month by month?
1:45:55 Speaker 03 It looks beautiful, new floors.
1:45:56 Chris Ryan? Maybe the Danforth estate gave them a little bit of money to shut up about it?
1:46:00 Bill Simmons? I feel like she should have had more money from the hotel room.
1:46:04 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:46:04 Bill Simmons? That should be like seventy-five thousand dollars behind.
1:46:07 Speaker 03 It looked like it was like a grand, like it was a stack, a small stack of hundreds.
1:46:11 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:46:11 Bill Simmons? Not enough. Any other nitpicks?
1:46:13 Chris Ryan? Um.
1:46:14 Bill Simmons? We did most of them.
1:46:15 Chris Ryan? Not really. I mean, we've talked about most of them, but like the identity thief who keeps his entire life story in a suitcase and the con man who sends a postcard with a return address.
1:46:25 Speaker 03 Yeah.
1:46:25 Bill Simmons? Do you have that in your house, CR? Like just your scrapbook?
1:46:27 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:46:28 Bill Simmons? Spin magazine in Grantland?
1:46:33 Bill Simmons? Uh, sequel, prequel, prestige TV, All Black Cast, Untouchable.
1:46:36 Chris Ryan? This has got Apple TV written all over it.
1:46:38 Bill Simmons? All over it. I can't believe they haven't done it yet.
1:46:41 Chris Ryan? There was a, uh, twenty twenty-one, twenty-two TV series being kicked around that did a gender swap. So I assume.
1:46:49 Speaker 03 Ah.
1:46:50 Chris Ryan? I assume Carter would have been a lady.
1:46:52 Bill Simmons? All Black Cast would have worked too. I mean, honestly, prequel would have worked. Um, sequel absolutely would have worked if you don't kill Carter Hayes and he just gets away Michael Myers style at the end. I'm in for that.
1:47:03 Speaker 03 The Carter Hayes Chronicle prequel is good, but All Black Cast, you then have a moment where you're like, I guess you're thinking right now, I should have rented to the white man. Like it would be all switched.
1:47:13 Bill Simmons? It's perfect. Is this movie better with Wayne Jenkins, Fergie the Florist, Zane Lowe, Robert Evans, Dr. Charles Nickel, uh, the owner of the luxury kite company?
1:47:26 Bill Simmons? Or someone else. What do you have, C R?
1:47:28 Chris Ryan? I just want to say up top, I would pay to watch a movie where this guy tries to pull this on either Wayne Jenkins or Fergie as his landlord.
1:47:39 Chris Ryan? You're gonna get out of this house for me, or I'm gonna do you the way I did your brother, the chemical way.
1:47:48 Chris Ryan? But it would be, it would be cool to have Zane talk to Carter afterwards. It's like, Carter?
1:47:53 Speaker 03 Talk him up.
1:47:53 Chris Ryan? You've extorted, you've trespassed, and you've identity thieved. What's next for you, man? What's the next con? And is it all a con? This whole thing, life?
1:48:05 Speaker 03 Is life a con?
1:48:08 Bill Simmons? What do you have, Kyle?
1:48:10 Speaker 03 I have, Bill, I feel like I'm gonna steal yours right now, but there's a, there's a sliding doors moment when Carter Hayes is running out of the hotel into the street. If he actually goes right, he goes into a ballroom and the keynote speaker is Dr. Charles Nichols. He's sitting there and he's like, Carter, I'm in the middle of this speech. And Carter goes, you, you switched off the utilities, didn't you? You switched the utilities. After I shot Drake, you were the only one with the access.
1:48:37 Chris Ryan? You stole my identity.
1:48:38 Speaker 03 Did you evict the Guatemalans too? Huh? Did you? And he's like, sorry, ladies and gentlemen, my friend, Carter Hayes, that doesn't feel well.
1:48:46 Chris Ryan? I was gonna write it to that black guy.
1:48:47 Speaker 03 Yes.
1:48:47 Chris Ryan? But you stole it.
1:48:49 Speaker 03 The application never came, so enjoy your, your coffee and dessert and we'll talk. Carter, please. He's there, he's there. He's always there.
1:48:55 Bill Simmons? That's a great one. I thought you were gonna do Gus there.
1:48:58 Speaker 03 No, Gus wasn't there, but the weird thing about the ballroom is at the end of it, Borat and Azamat run in naked too. Like, they, they just, the place comes down.
1:49:07 Bill Simmons? We could have done a little Ryan Ruko for Carter Hayes falling backwards. Got it!
1:49:15 Bill Simmons? Just one Oscar who gets it.
1:49:16 Chris Ryan? That would have been good in honor of Modine, Super Knicks fan.
1:49:19 Bill Simmons? Oh, yeah. Just one Oscar who gets it. I guess Keaton.
1:49:22 Chris Ryan? I guess so.
1:49:23 Bill Simmons? Not Hans Zimmer.
1:49:24 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:49:26 Bill Simmons? Probably answerable questions. I only have one. Did these two losers stay together or was it like a breakup in the next two months?
1:49:31 Chris Ryan? I wanted to know how long you guys thought they had been together before this movie. Like, you know, like up to the point of buying the house. Is this a one year? One year thing?
1:49:40 Speaker 03 I think it's really short. I actually had six months. I think they're very impulsive people.
1:49:45 Bill Simmons? Oh, I think it's at least. You don't buy a house with somebody unless it's two years.
1:49:47 Speaker 03 I know, two, three years.
1:49:49 Chris Ryan? In 1990?
1:49:50 Bill Simmons? Yeah, it's like you're two years, I think, at that point.
1:49:52 Chris Ryan? Uh, I don't think they last.
1:49:53 Bill Simmons? He was with her when she got hurt during the equestrian race.
1:49:56 Chris Ryan? They realized they have absolutely nothing to say to each other after about a week.
1:50:00 Bill Simmons? They don't even have like, like a lunch scene where she's like, I thought I'd surprise you at work. Oh.
1:50:07 Chris Ryan? No, they don't seem to like each other that much. She's even kind of like, what are you doing here? When he shows up at the horse.
1:50:12 Bill Simmons? They really brought the set into the movie. Memorabilia you'd most want from the movie, Kyle?
1:50:18 Speaker 03 Um, I want that little model house that Carter Hayes gives them.
1:50:21 Bill Simmons? That was cool.
1:50:22 Chris Ryan? The fake Drake Goodman ID stuff. So his, his Visa card, like the old Visa card.
1:50:27 Bill Simmons? Yeah.
1:50:28 Chris Ryan? The old bank books.
1:50:28 Speaker 03 Oh, yeah.
1:50:29 Bill Simmons? Good passport. Finstock, Mr. Miyagi were best, worst life lesson. I mean, this one has a pretty obvious one.
1:50:36 Chris Ryan? Don't be a landlord.
1:50:37 Bill Simmons? Well, just, don't let the person in. Don't let, do the sign in the lease. I'll pay you later. Like, get the fucking money.
1:50:45 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:50:45 Bill Simmons? Yeah.
1:50:46 Speaker 03 Kids, if you ever hear the phrase, I don't have a traditional kind of credit, run. That's not what you want.
1:50:52 Chris Ryan? That's right.
1:50:53 Bill Simmons? Or they mention their bank in San Antonio, you're out. Double feature choice, what'd you have, KB?
1:50:59 Speaker 03 Okay, so this is interesting. Uh, I had Mr. Mom, because it's really nice, fun, Michael Keaton. But I have to tell you, I was watching the movie Pacific Heights on Prime, Amazon, and, um, it goes to the next movie and the next movie was Unfaithful. And I was like, fuck, yes. And I watched the first half hour. It's like a con man. It's all that. So I went right into it and I liked it.
1:51:18 Bill Simmons? Oh.
1:51:18 Chris Ryan? I had two. Uh, one was, uh, The Money Pit from 1986, the Tom Hanks movie about.
1:51:24 Bill Simmons? That's a good one.
1:51:24 Chris Ryan? Losing your mind, trying to, uh, save your home. And the other was, a little bit different, War of the Roses, just because it's like kind of being trapped in a house with somebody.
1:51:33 Speaker 03 Sure.
1:51:34 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:51:35 Bill Simmons? I did Single Way Female. Did we do the roommate tenant combo? Let me just go. What do you have, Craig?
1:51:41 Speaker 04 For double feature, probably Transformers.
1:51:45 Speaker 03 Transformers won.
1:51:46 Speaker 04 War of the Roses, honestly.
1:51:47 Bill Simmons? Uh, who won the movie? Keaton?
1:51:49 Chris Ryan? Keaton.
1:51:50 Speaker 03 Michael Keaton, after Batman, another dub as a villain. Oh, why I like this movie.
1:51:55 Bill Simmons? Craig, can't wait for your take. Here we go. Craig loves From Hell Month, by the way.
1:52:01 Speaker 04 I do. These are what real movies should be. You can watch them at noon on a Monday. They're great. I liked, what I liked about this one is that there was like much more mystery. Typically, it was like domestic disturbance or hand that rocks the cradle and you kind of just know the motive from the beginning and you're just waiting to get to the end. I enjoyed that this movie, they treat Keaton like Jaws a little bit. And you're like, I don't really know what he's up to. I don't see him a whole lot. Who's Greg? What's going on in LA? And I think it's why the, the whole mystery takes you down to LA and it's why that scene is so good. But I think this is one of the more satisfying From Hell movies because you actually get like the plot to take this person down. Rather than just the big fight at the end results in the villain dying.
1:52:41 Speaker 04 This was like, oh, for like 20 minutes, I get Melanie Griffith actually plotting to get back at this guy and it's working. I feel like that was more satisfying. Also, this movie is kind of the inspiration for the show Beef. If you think, I mean, it's kind of like a.
1:52:54 Chris Ryan? From Hell Month has definitely got some of that.
1:52:56 Speaker 04 It's a road rage, but for real estate kind of vibes and it's, it's very relatable in that regard. I also think it's kind of just a great look at how men and women deal with problems differently.
1:53:05 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:53:06 Speaker 04 This is like a great men not being able to admit they're wrong movie. Like, I can handle this, Patty. It's like, honey, do you, don't you want to just pull up a map and get directions? It's like, no, no, I know how to get there. Like, it's like basically that. Yeah. It's a great men versus women dealing with problems movie.
1:53:21 Speaker 03 Great call.
1:53:23 Chris Ryan? Thumbs up.
1:53:24 Bill Simmons? You've enjoyed From Hell Month.
1:53:26 Speaker 04 It's great. I'm having a blast. Yeah.
1:53:27 Bill Simmons? These are great. There's lots more. It's just maybe this is just the rest of 2026.
1:53:32 Speaker 03 What's on the horizon, Bill?
1:53:33 Bill Simmons? Well, we've done, uh, domestic disturbance and the good son.
1:53:38 Chris Ryan? Hand that rocks the cradle, single way female.
1:53:40 Bill Simmons? Yeah, and there's a couple, couple winners left.
1:53:42 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:53:43 Bill Simmons? There really is.
1:53:44 Speaker 03 The one that you've mentioned.
1:53:45 Bill Simmons? I've been scouting some other ones that I wasn't sure and, uh.
1:53:49 Speaker 03 Yeah. How'd it go?
1:53:50 Bill Simmons? Uh, there's some bad ones.
1:53:53 Bill Simmons? I watched Save Me on MGM with Harry Hamlin and Lisette Anthony.
1:53:57 Chris Ryan? Oh, come on. We can't do that.
1:53:58 Bill Simmons? No, it was, I thought it was a.
1:54:01 Chris Ryan? Or we have to like, we have to do like the re-Godfather somewhere in there.
1:54:05 Bill Simmons? No, it was terrible.
1:54:06 Speaker 03 To cleanse the palate.
1:54:08 Bill Simmons? It was truly, truly awful. But I just, you know, just looking around.
1:54:12 Speaker 03 The one that you've mentioned before that I always have gotten so entertained by is Cop From Hell on Lawful Entry. And what's really fun about that movie is Madeline Stowe's character is named Karen. And so you get Ray Liotta going, you're a cock teaser, Karen. And it's like, right after Goodfellas. It's awesome.
1:54:31 Bill Simmons? That's Kurt Russell's in that, right?
1:54:32 Speaker 03 Yeah, yeah.
1:54:33 Bill Simmons? And then he's also in Breakdown. He did double From Hell duty. Breakdown's one of our favorites.
1:54:38 Speaker 04 Do we have a good modern From Hell movie? All these movies are from the 90s. What's like the best recent From Hell movie?
1:54:42 Chris Ryan? The 2000s. I can't remember, when's Perfect Getaway, like the, when's that movie? Let me see.
1:54:47 Bill Simmons? No, it kind of ended in the 2000s.
1:54:49 Speaker 04 Perfect Getaway's 09.
1:54:50 Chris Ryan? 09?
1:54:51 Bill Simmons? I just feel like this moved to Lifetime and then they did every single version of them. But another one that we've talked about doing, because Van loves is The Fan with Robert De Miro and.
1:55:03 Speaker 03 Benicio and Wesley Snipes.
1:55:04 Bill Simmons? With the worst ending probably of any sports movie of all time, but it's still really fun and it's Tony Scott.
1:55:09 Speaker 04 I mean, to be honest, is Obsession kind of like the girlfriend from Hell?
1:55:13 Chris Ryan? Or the boyfriend from Hell. Sure.
1:55:15 Bill Simmons? Obsession?
1:55:16 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:55:16 Bill Simmons? You think that could be in there?
1:55:17 Chris Ryan? I wouldn't know. I don't know if it's From Hell, but it's, it's pretty, it would be pretty fun to do Obsession as a rewatchable now.
1:55:24 Bill Simmons? This would be a good.
1:55:25 Chris Ryan? We haven't done a 2026 movie yet.
1:55:27 Bill Simmons? No. We're due.
1:55:30 Chris Ryan? Yeah.
1:55:30 Bill Simmons? But it'll probably be The Odyssey, right?
1:55:32 Chris Ryan? I guess so.
1:55:33 Speaker 03 Dune Part 3, Bill. Let's go.
1:55:36 Chris Ryan? He's got to see the first two Dunes.
1:55:37 Bill Simmons? Could we do a From Hell, Good Morning Football, there's a new person on the show?
1:55:46 Bill Simmons? Former football player who just likes to hang out and then it just starts going sideways?
1:55:50 Speaker 03 I have a quip, but I'm not going to say it.
1:55:53 Chris Ryan? Okay.
1:55:53 Speaker 03 Because it would get me in trouble.
1:55:54 Bill Simmons? There's another one that I think I'm the only one who likes it. But it's a great, great, great From Hell movie that I highly recommend. If you like my recommendations.
1:56:04 Speaker 03 Sure.
1:56:05 Bill Simmons? Bad Influence with Rob Lowe and Joe Spader.
1:56:07 Chris Ryan? We were talking about this.
1:56:08 Bill Simmons? I think that movie's really good. It's Curtis Hansen's first movie. I just think it's excellent, but nobody's seen it.
1:56:13 Chris Ryan? That'd be crazy.
1:56:14 Speaker 03 I haven't seen it.
1:56:15 Chris Ryan? You just did the entire Hansen filmography.
1:56:17 Bill Simmons? Yeah. I think you would like Bad Influence. Anyway, all right, Kyle Brandt, this was a pleasure as always.
1:56:24 Chris Ryan? Good to see you, man.
1:56:24 Speaker 03 Thank you, Jen. Thank you, CR.
1:56:26 Bill Simmons? Thank you, CR.
1:56:27 Speaker 03 The whole Storm family.
1:56:28 Bill Simmons? Thanks, Craig. Thanks to Chris and Gahow and Eduardo as well. And we will see you next time on The Rewatchables.
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