The Basement Yard
Original podcast
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Welcome back to the basement.
Welcome back to the basement yard. You saluted.
It's a, it's a, it's a...
How you doing?
Hey!
Yeah.
You know, one of those.
The fuck was that? Why'd you make us... Oh, is that the, uh...
That's like a...
Anime?
Yeah, that's like a, ugh, you know?
Okay, you didn't explain.
That was a little bony. That was a little bony.
People are listening and you just went, "Ugh."
I know, I know. I was doing the, what's the dude, uh, Ethan Slater? Remember that interview he did?
Oh, yeah.
On the red carpet where he was just like, "Poo, man, I don't know."
Yeah, and he just...
And then people are just like, "Oh, man, that sucked."
He's just like, fully committed. I have been watching a lot of Digimon lately, so... My, my reactions are really just, uh...
Okay, but 32 years old, you know?
I know. Hey, listen. I know how old I am.
When, when are you watching Digimon? Like, is it a morning thing?
Yeah, yeah, so the other...
You wake up in the morning?
So the other morning.
You make yourself a tea?
Uh, so...
And you put on Digimon?
I'm gonna follow, I'm gonna walk you through...
Frank, I need the abridged version of this.
Okay, I'll make it as bridgy as possible, okay?
Not how you chortle.
I wake up, give, you know, I get the girls, you know, Ruby and Maeve and Miles, situated with their breakfast, you know, they get to watch their... But they love getting in bed with Becca.
This is the abridged version?
I'll bring Becca her coffee in bed. She sits there, the kids like to sit with her and watch something on the TV in the room, so I have the time to go watch what I want to watch. So the other morning...
Hold on.
Pause. You're telling me you wake up in the morning, the children come into the room and they hang out with mom?
Mm-hmm.
And you're like, "I'm going to the living room to watch Digimon, away from my family."
Well, first, I don't know if you saw, WWE has established a connection, you know, a business relationship with Netflix.
I know that because you asked me if I want to play Call of Duty and then texted me five minutes later and said, "Oh, wait, I forgot, Raw." is on Netflix and I said, who are you texting? Why are you telling me this? Like, oh yeah, that's right. Never mind. Let's both watch it. Like, what are you talking about? Well, so I went on Netflix and I, I first I threw on a Monday Night Raw from 1999. Watched that for a little bit, had to see, you know, the right to censor face off against the Hardy Boys and Lita.
That was actually from 2001, uh, but shout out to Leah with her thong showing, really got me going back in the day.
Dude, seeing part of your thong?
Oh my God.
Man, just some good like embroidered cloth got us going at that age.
There was a span of three years that seeing the side string of a thong or like the, God forbid, I saw the back part of the thong.
Oh, like just
Coming up above the pants.
Just the sides.
Just the sides. That was better than anything in the world.
I will say this. Insane that women wear that. Or however you choose to identify, insane anyone wears that.
How could you? How is that comfortable?
Like, I, listen, are dude, are gay dudes wearing thongs?
No way.
I don't know.
I don't know, Joey.
Dick in a thong?
You can fit a dick in a thong.
Joey, there's some thongs.
Dude, not Brazilian ones.
And there, there are some, there are some, there's some pelvic bones on women that are dicky. You know what I'm saying? Like they're, they're lumpy. They're, they're like
I don't know. I don't know what you're talking about.
They're full.
Okay, but
They got full hips.
No, no, I don't. Yeah, but I'm not talking about that part. I'm talking about the part that's gonna hold your shut out.
Yeah, well, maybe they, you know, like think of Speedos. Speedos are the closest thing.
Yeah, but, but thongs are like, they're like
I know, I know. They're crazy. They're crazy. I, I, so I don't know. I don't understand why, like, you know, like whoever, big underwear, really, really fucked with women.
Tiny underwear, honestly.
No, no, no, no, but big underwear.
Big, big, the corporation of underwear.
Corporation of big underwear.
They, they, they fucked around and they convinced people that if it's not a thong, it's granny panties. When like, listen, if that was my underwear of choice, I'm going the panties from the granny all the time. They look comfy.
Um. But they make you look like you got crapped.
I don't care if anyone thinks it looked like I crapped. I, it cares if I actually crap.
I mean, I care about that as well, but you know.
Who's looking at you? Your ass is garbage as it is.
Don't even, you're, you always talk, just poop about my butt.
He's always talking poop about my butt.
Honestly, Joey, with, you get to sit there on your throne and your fat butt and then you're gonna make fun of the less fortunate.
It's not that you're less fortunate, it's just that you were born with less.
I'm a street rat when it comes to ass.
You're a street rat of ass.
I'm Aladdin of ass.
You are, honestly, that sounds pretty cool. You're, you're like the, you're, you're like the Quasimodo of ass. That's what you are. But, was he homeless? He, no, well technically, he lived in a bell tower, I think.
He lived in the church?
He lived in the-
In Notre Dame.
But the top of the church.
Wait, he's French? Quasimodo's French.
Quasimodo.
Oh yeah.
Yeah, you see it.
That just sounds like four motorbikes.
Quasimodo?
Yeah, no, I honestly didn't think that he was French, bro. Imagine looking like that and then also-
Being French.
And sound, and, you know what I'm saying?
Yeah, like-
That's a lot of things at once.
That's a lot of things going on at once, because, you know, like, the, the French, to me at least, the French dialect is a little tough on the ears, like, it could be, it's a little, like, kinda oily.
Yeah, slippery, it's slippery.
Exactly, it's slippery.
Yeah, it's like, all the words are like coming out before they're ready.
You know what I mean?
They're underbaked. Everything comes out the oven-
Too soft.
They, a little too soft and mushy, you know what I'm saying?
But, I don't remember where I was, but I am gonna revert back to the fact.
I'm sorry.
No, you acknowledge, rightfully so, that your ass is not your best feature.
Well, if we're doing a comparison.
But you got a great face!
Thanks.
Other people need ass, you got face. Your face is your ass, you know?
My face is my ass.
People see people walking by and they go, "Damn, like, that's a butt."
So you're saying my face-
Your face is a good ass.
My face is my big tits.
Yes, dude.
Okay.
Yeah, exactly. You have big tits, but they're just on your cheeks.
It's on my face.
Yeah, on your cheeks.
What's your big tits?
My ass.
Your ass?
My ass is my tits.
My tits are kind of also tits right now.
What does that mean?
Oh, I, I have, I need to get a little bit more back into it.
Oh, oh, I see what you're saying.
I would also say that my humor is my tits.
You've got big humor tits.
I have a good personality.
Which is-
For me.
Lights up a room.
It's a, that's a room, a roomer lighter upper.
There's an easy way to say that.
So, back to what we were saying. You, your, your ass is not, you know, like you know what your strengths are.
I do.
But, a little bit of, a little bit of leg workouts, you've also, you have a bum knee, you know, like you said that your ankle was hurting you a couple of months ago. Like, if you just start doing some like, lower body workouts, your ass can be...
Right.
Your, your tits, you know what I mean?
I gotta, I gotta start doing whatever the, the models on Instagram are doing.
Yeah, so back to what I was saying, start off my morning with Monday Night Raw.
And then, you know, there wasn't a new episode of like Creature Commandos, so I would go and I watched the Digimon Adventure on Hulu.
Can we, can we explain what that is? Is that an adult show?
Uh, yeah, actually it is.
What is it?
It's the first entry created by James Gunn in the new version of the DCU. It's Creature Commandos, it's a animated, uh, uh, show on Max.
What does, what are you, what are your kids watching? Like, in the bedroom with, with Becca?
Um...
Because you're in the other room watching Creature Commandos!
Creature Commando, I mean, they can't watch that, there's a lot of blood and stuff.
Oh, Creature Commandos and Digimon and...
Digimon, Monday Night Raw.
Um, they're watching classic kid shows, Bluey.
Uh, uh, um, you know, uh...
What is, does Becca, does anyone in this house watch anything that's above, you know?
Becca and I started watching a show, a movie called Night Bitch.
Night Bitch?
Is that about a, what is that about?
Well, it's in the name.
Bitch?
Jesus Christ, Joey, oh my god.
Oh, a knight with a K?
No, knights, like, the evening, bitch.
As in, I assume it's not about a dog?
It, yeah, it kind of is. It's about, Amy Adams is a stay-at-home mom and slowly feels her mental health kind of, you know, escaping her and envisions herself be, turning into a dog at night.
Night bitch.
That sounds like we made up the name for that show.
I know, it's a movie.
It's like, yo, we can get away with saying bitch.
Cause it's a dog.
Yeah, back when like, just putting two cool words together was cool, you know what I mean?
Fuck suck.
You did that a lot.
Yeah, well.
Um, also, by the way, I just wanted to say on the way here, I saw a fantastic piece of graffiti.
That was probably the whitest I've ever been in my life.
A fantastic piece of graffiti.
What a piece of shit you are, dude. First of all, a single graffiti is a graffito, by the way.
Is that true?
I think so.
Frank, you don't get to do those sentences back to back.
Like, one stick of spaghetti is spaghettio.
I heard that.
Yeah, so like, but no one, what's the reason for that? No one's ever gonna eat a spaghettio. I mean, if you, you, you take one spaghettio and you, you spaghettio it up.
Do you think we can break the world record for the longest spaghettio?
What is it? Now we have to look up what the longest spaghettio world record is.
You, you, you.
Phone Frank, back in action! You asked the question. World.
Frank, I'm asking the universe and earth. I'm not asking you to find out.
I'm gonna find out. World longest spaghettio is...
Whoa. Is it long?
The world's longest noodle, uh, was created, uh, by an Asian company in China and.
God damn it.
In October 2017. Took them 17 hours to roll out the single noodle by hand. And it was 10,000 feet, which is about 3,000 meters. So about two miles.
Forget it.
A little under two miles.
I was hoping it was like 10 feet, bro.
Yeah, me too. That would be a good one, where, yeah. But, we can start, you know how like Guinness, they have their world record stuff?
We can do a standing out of studio world record book.
But it's, wouldn't be the world.
But it's our world, baby.
Wait, is Guinness World Records like Guinness drinks?
I.
Beers?
I don't know. I'm gonna say I don't know, but I, cause I don't know. Dude, I watched you have to actively not say something definitive that you don't know the answer to. You were like, I, I don't know.
Yeah, that, oh, I didn't even, you know?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Do we trust a beer company that like?
Yep.
I mean, they're best in the world!
Let's be honest, they're probably around, like, involved in some capacity when these crazy, like, challenges are being done.
No one's doing it sober, you know? They've had a couple Guinness, Ginno, by the way.
I'm done it, I'm done with this. Ginno. But I, I saw, uh, like, a, a thing of graffiti, I was driving by and it said on a, it was spray painted on just like scaffolding and it said, "Pierced titties taste like house keys."
God damn.
That's crazy!
That is crazy. That is not inaccurate, though.
I, I can with confidence say, I have never met my mouth to a railroaded tit.
Railroaded!
You know what I mean, like, the, the, like, it was, like, you know, a lot of metal that goes into building railroads.
I've only come across...
Three.
Two? Like, individuals or like a set and then an additional one, like a one and a half type situation?
I'm talking about sets.
So, three sets you've come across?
Two?
Two sets is still a lot!
How is that a lot?
I feel, who, who got their nipples, uh, pierced nowadays?
A bunch of people when we were like nineteen, twenty.
I had a, uh, an ex-girlfriend's best friend get it done and like, her and the girl that was her friend, my, my then, at the time girlfriend, showed up and she was just like, "She got it done, do you wanna see?" And I was like, "No."
And she's like, "No, it's okay. I, I, I said that you could see it." And I was like, "Thank you, owner of my eyes." "I don't wanna see this severely inflamed nipple."
Oh, so you wanted to wait until the swelling went down?
I didn't wanna see it at any point in time, cuz I didn't wanna see this girl's nipples.
And, uh...
Did, did they do it anyway?
You know, I can't remember if they just, you know, kind of showed me. But I've heard that like-
It was against your will?
Probably, if it happened. No, if it happened, definitely was against my will.
I've heard that to get a nipple piercing, they need to like, take a chunk of your nipple out.
Well, I mean, if they're making a hole in your nipple, that hole has to go somewhere.
Well, no, because-
There's gotta be donut holes of nipples all over the earth. You ever think about that?
Ah!
There's a little bit of nipple in everything.
In, in-
Not in everything.
I mean, we are all, we are all, you know, we bend our knee to the nipple in society. At one point in time, we most likely sucked from a nipple. Well, yeah, provided life, nourishment.
Right. Nipples.
It is weird, right?
It's just a different color.
In Night Bitch, she gets eight nipples.
So she is becoming a dog. Spoiler, she gets eight nipples.
We didn't finish the movie-
You see all eight nipples?
We didn't finish the movie cuz we fell asleep. We did get to a point where you saw six of the eight nipples.
So she wasn't fully-
She wasn't fully nipple'd out.
Right. Uh, she had some time.
Yeah, she, she had a bra on, Miss Adams.
She had three bras on?
She had a bra on, and then like, you see-
More nipples.
The other nipples.
Did they look like dog nipples, or they look like woman nipples?
I mean...
That's a great question, honestly.
You were asleep.
Uh, no, no, no. I'm just thinking like, do dog, do dog nipples and woman nipples-
They look different.
They do, but like-
Dogs don't have areolas. They just have like, a little spike, like a-
You know.
This is a conversation we're having.
You know what we should get, because we have our buddy Hank Green, who helps us with any science questions that we have.
I don't think that he specializes in dog.
We need to get a, like a, like an animal person. And hear me out.
An animal person?
An animal person. We have talked a lot last year about celebrity endorsements for the show. If you remember, Ryan Reynolds, Taylor Swift, they were in the running, you know? There was a lot going on. They've since bowed out respectfully.
Robert Irwin. There might be.
Ooh!
There might be an opportunity for you here, bud.
Get him in here, bring a croc in here, tape its mouth off.
No, no, no, no, he doesn't need to come in here, he can just kind of like.
Be our.
Boost his social media.
No, he's gotta come in here.
You want him to come in?
And he's gotta bring a croc.
Have we talked shit about his dad?
Hope not. I would never talk shit about Steve Irwin.
Okay, alright, I just wanna make sure.
You may have talked shit about him.
Not outwardly.
I feel like you were inwardly and I heard it tell.
No, I wouldn't, I don't think.
No, I love Steve Irwin, dude. It's on sight for all the stingrays. I really don't fuck with them anymore.
I touched a stingray once and, and there was a part of me that was just like, I wanted to fucking swing at it.
I touched a stingray, it was before they did that shit.
That was a long time ago, brother. That was like 2008?
I was mad young, I went, I think, it might have been a school trip where you like touched him.
Oh.
I also didn't like it, I was like, I don't need to touch this shit.
I don't wanna.
There's so many other animals I would rather touch in the zoo than a fucking stingray, fuck that shit.
Gimme three.
Lion.
That's, that's a good one, but scary.
Anything with fur, honestly, over a fucking stingray.
Okay, alright, alright, I'll give you that.
I'll pet a goat, bro, I fuck with goats. Goats are fucking hilarious.
Dude, me and goats, we go way back.
I love goats. Alpacas, dude, those are people in suits. Those aren't animals.
They have alpaca farms in Jersey, I've been to a couple times.
I've been to an alpaca farm.
Yeah, they, they're, they're cool. They are, they are bigger animals than you think, though. They're, they look like they are weak, they are not, they are strong.
Bro, recently I went to one. It's, it's like an open farm, it was in Canada. Alpacas, big fucking sheep, and the goats were ramming my legs.
Oh, you were getting rammed in the legs?
They were, yeah, they were ramming me!
You were getting rammed?
There was one old one that had a weird hump, and I was like, this shit is.
Get that away.
But he fucked with me.
That was the Quasimodo of sheep.
It was. And he was following me around and I was like, I fuck with this guy. And I was like, yo, anybody tries to ram him, you're gonna have to go through me.
Oh, so no one's ramming that sheep with the weird deformity except for you.
Yeah, and then there was a little jungle gym. And there was a sheep, not a sheep, a goat that like climbed the slide and was just laying in it.
Goats love to climb, dude.
That's where, if you saw the video on my Instagram of the big ass pig that pissed.
Yeah, pissed pig.
What was her name? Her name was like Darcy or some shit.
There you go.
It was a name of like a woman who yells.
I love that.
Alice. It was Alice.
I knew when Alice yelled a lot too. That's crazy.
That's what I'm saying, bro.
She was Irish. I, I knew.
I love when goats like run and jump off something and like do the like the back leg kick because they're so excited.
Yes.
They're like, yes.
Bro, also these goats would like get up on their hind legs and then go like this, like and then hit like that.
And I was like, this is so awesome.
I will say though, goats, goats have better like designed heads. The fact that they have those horns that someone could just grab and have full control of them.
I mean, they're, they're fighting other goats, dude. They're not fighting things with hands. They're gonna fight monkeys?
Evolve, evolve. The monkeys evolve to fight other animals, my guy. It's dog eat dog out there. What did Charles Darwin say? It's, it's all survival of the fittest. Darwin, not Darwin.
Yo, also there was ponies. Not as soft as I wanted them to be.
Yes, I gotta say, horses, beautiful, soft, velvety, love them. Mini ponies though, they're like the white man with dreads. You know what I mean? Like they're just like, ah, you're almost there, you know? Yeah, come on.
I wish ponies were. I, we need to like shampoo them differently or something. I don't know.
Yeah, just.
They're just so coarse.
I agree. I agree and I don't like that.
Also sheep.
Wool is kind of disgusting.
I like wool.
I like, I like it when we've processed it.
Oh, and wear it.
While it's on the sheep.
Where you take it and call it manifest destiny and then just claim it as yours.
Well, no, you have to do that. That's good for them.
Well, you shear them. You don't need it. You could give it to somebody else.
Do you know if you don't shear a sheep, it will just die?
I know. It's very sad.
That's so sad.
I will say, one of my favorite holes that I've ever went down on TikTok were like the sheep shearing people.
That are just like, it's like an old Irish guy and he's like, this one hasn't had his shear in quite some time. And we're gonna help him feel right at home.
You know, and I'm just like, yeah, man.
Bro, there was a guy I used to see on TikTok who was like, I think Irish also, but he had one of those little driver hats.
I love those.
And he like would restore old swords.
Wood! No, no. It's like a guy, he has like, he's like, I, uh, this is an old hammer from, uh,
Yes!
My paw.
My paw!
And he'd be in a shed.
He's in a shed. He's like, this is an old hammer from my paw. It's made of teak wood and, uh, red, uh, open tarpon wood or something.
That's fire.
And like, and I'm just like, yeah, and he like breaks it out and he's just like fucking like.
He's like fucking doing shit?
Yeah, dude, I'm so with it.
And then he's scrubbing it. I'm like, yo, it's becoming like a good hammer now.
I love that. I also love the people that find like old rusted axes.
Bro.
And they put them in that electric vat.
What the fuck is that?
I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. But I like it. And then you see all the dirty rust come off of it.
Yeah!
And they're scraping it.
Dude, when people take jewelry and they just put it in that water and all of a sudden dust comes off of it?
I'm like, what is that? Is that electrified water?
Uh, it's like a chemical. Yeah, it's, it's something like that.
I thought there was like a vibration thing going on.
There is a vibration thing also, but I think that they prob, it's a, it's a specific chemical, because the color is not like, it's like a light blue sometimes, like bluish green. You know, I will say this, if you want to get me in to like any like, working with your hands, like area of like social media and TikTok.
The person that does it needs to be Irish.
Oh, my God.
Because if they're just like, hey, I'm gonna restore this axe.
Like, ew, Whitey, get out of here. Hate that shit, dude.
Or if they're like, alright, today we found this beautiful. And I'm just like, yeah!
Yeah, now we're talking about, yeah. I hate, I hate when Americans try to restore stuff.
Stop!
And or when they just try to just full on take stuff and say it's ours now.
Yeah, like Canada.
They're doing that.
Why aren't we taking Greenland and like
We want to take the Panama Canal
The Gulf of America
The Gulf of America, Canada
Let's go, I
Everything we were worried about is coming true It's taking over the world
We got nothing to beat right now
Alright?
I'd go to Greenland though I heard it's like 20% inhabitable, not that I would live there, but like, I'd go look at it
See it, see it, just like, whoo, cool, then just get out of there?
Yeah, fly low, so I can see it and then come home
Yeah, I don't, I don't, I don't even know if I care that much, but I'll tell you-
About Greenland, I never think about that country
I'll, I'll tell you this though
I care, Canada might be, you know, rumors it might be the 51st state
Right, which would be cool because if we opened up those borders, maybe the moose can walk around a little more, maybe we'd see some more, that'd be cool
Hold on, hold on, first of all, maybe, maybe let them have their things over there, you know? If they voted, they want to do it, that's on them
Listen, I'm just saying, if the border's open, one of the perks is the moose
So the first perk you can think of?
Moose
Is the, hold on, first perk you can think of is the exchange of moose?
No exchange, we're just going to take the moose, not take
No, no, no, no, no
I don't want to take the moose, I want the moose to know that they have more places to go
I don't-
They can walk down
First of all, unless I'm mistaken, I believe the northern part of the United States also has moose
Yeah, they do, I've seen one
Okay
In Colorado, but I'm saying like, we, we should have more, not that we should, but I would like more
So you think, instead of like, doing our best to protect the ones that we have and maybe encourage them to breed and create more here, you want to just full on take the other moose?
How do you encourage a moose to breed?
Are you saying that Canadian moose are better than American moose?
I'm saying, if there was a war, we'd probably lose that really big
A moose war?
Yeah
Bro, they have way more meese than us!
Meese, I don't think, I think you're wrong there.
Goose, geese, moose, meese.
Mouse. It's moose.
It's just moose?
I believe, yeah.
More, so moose is singular and plural?
Like fish.
No.
No, cuz fish, when there's more than one, there's fishes.
Wrong. It's a school of fish.
Which is one of my biggest fears, honestly. Being in the water and a school of fish just kinda like swims through you, I'd fucking flip.
Hmm, yeah.
Although I would enjoy, you ever see when fish, and they whip, and they're like, fucking like Voldemort Dumbledore?
I dunno what you're talking about. I'm talking about being in the water and there's like a tornado of fish. And they're like swimming around you, but the, but you can see the wa- like the, the surface of the water and it's like, "Oh, I'm surrounded by fish." I would love to be in that.
Nah, fuck that. I would really like, I like when like they'll like swim really fast in like a school and then they'll like, kinda like make a quick move.
Yeah, they turn really fast!
Like fucking Dumbledore, when he's doing the, you know, and they're just like, "Yeah, wah!"
Yeah, yeah.
You know, you know.
I do, fish are really cool.
Back to what I was saying about the whole Canada.
Back is like, well I dunno how far back we're going, like at this point. Canada's becoming a state?
But, like, they should figure that out.
Their prime minister stepped down. Now's the time.
I guess.
Did you see, did they have one?
Elon Musk's response to, to Justin Trudeau?
I fucking hate that guy so much. I fucking hate Elon Musk, dude. He's just annoying.
Girl, you're not in charge anymore.
Yeah, and it's like, "Bro, why you trying to talk in memes? Shut the fuck up."
I think that's the thing, cuz, listen, we're not gonna parse through, you know, the dealings of Elon Musk, but-
He's a dweeb.
The fact that he just like fully talks on the internet in the form of meme.
That is a red flag.
It drives me crazy.
It's not like, the worst person in the world does that, you know what I mean? Like, everyone knows someone that only responds on like Facebook with like a-
A gif or something?
A minion gif, you know?
Yo, you know what I fucking hate? When people respond with stickers.
You ever see those stickers that like kinda move? No. Oh! I don't even know how to even describe it. Are you just referencing a med? Doesn't a med do that? No, well you're thinking of the uh, the ones that like look like you. Oh, okay, the bitmoji? Bitmoji, yeah. Which that is a cool Pokemon name, Bitmoji. Absolutely not. I can name literally a hundred cooler Pokemon names than Bitmoji. Well, I'm just saying like a one that doesn't exist yet. No. Come up with a Pokemon name, go.
Scissor Shart. Yeah, see, I mean, uh... You see what I'm... You see what's happening? Scissor Shart.
This kid watches Digimon every single morning and he can't come up with a name better than Scissor Shart.
Fucking crazy. Scissor Shart. Bitmoji sucked, yeah. Scissor Shart is worse, and we have ads. Uh...
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Yeah, that's really nice, and while you're sitting in your skims, and you got a good old fashioned Omaha steak right in front of you, why don't you do yourself a favor? Go to www dot the, uh, patreon dot com slash the basement yard. I almost messed it up, but I didn't. Why? Because I rebounded, baby, just like Pippen. Uh, was he though? Rodman, who was the rebounder? Clearly not me. Go to patreon.com/thebasementyard. Thank you guys. We actually did it. We got to over 33,000 patrons. We are so appreciative, so thankful, so grateful, and we are using all of that to gear up for a really fun, exciting 2025. We have so much that we're trying to do and really thanks to, in part, not only the love and support that you all give us, but the patrons.
So go to patreon.com/thebasementyard. You sign up for that first tier, you get exclusive, uh, these weekly episodes, every single week before. So you get it a week before they go live for everybody else on YouTube or any other platform. And then, uh, what you could do is you can go for that second tier and you get exclusive episodes every single Friday. Yeah, that's what I'm talking about. So you can start and end your week with the basement yard. So thank you guys again. We really appreciate it. We love you. We're really excited for this year. So go check it out. Patreon.com/thebasementyard.
Yes, um, also, we have to talk about this, but I'm going to Paris in Switzerland next week.
Friday. Are you excited?
I'm very excited.
Bali!
I've never been there.
How do they talk in Switzerland?
Oh, no. I think they speak French.
I think they're Dutch over there.
I think, I'm pretty sure they're mostly French.
Or a Swiss?
A language? I don't, I don't know. I think, I think it's like a mix of languages. I think it's like German and French.
Play up that you're a dumb American.
Play up? I'm trying to think. This show. Watch it for five minutes, you'll know. Um, but I, I wanted to get a nice ski jacket.
Oh, that's right. You're skiing out there.
Going to go ski.
Are you worried that you're gonna like fall and get hurt?
So the last three times that I've went skiing, I haven't fell at all. Uh, I don't really send it. I'm due. I don't.
Someone dropped fucking change upstairs?
Yeah, what was that? It sounded like hard macaroni just got spilled.
We had it with change.
Just watch your smile fade away, it was great.
I know.
You had to try to one up me with hard macaroni?
I don't even know what that means.
Um, but, uh, so I went to this store, it's a French store, it's a brand that makes fusalp. I don't know how to pronounce it.
What is that?
It's like...
Was that, what, what is going on? What is it called, fusalp?
Something like that.
Oh, is this like a, or is this like a clothing?
It's a brand, it's a brand.
Oh, okay.
They make like ski shit.
How to pronounce?
He's looking it up, yeah.
That had put...
Oh, is there like little dots over the letters and stuff like that? Is there a, is there a fjord in there somewhere? Or am I completely off on the country?
What's a fjord?
F, the J that has the two dots on it, top, I think it's called it, der Umlauts?
That sounds German.
You're gonna be wrong, I'm also choking this mic down, do you see this?
I don't know how to pronounce it, we're, we're, we're done, yeah. Uh, but regardless, I went there and there was no one else in the store. Right, it was just me and the two sales associates and they double teamed me, basically.
After getting rammed by the goat earlier, now you're getting double teamed by the French.
Well, these were, these were months apart. Uh, I got some, I got a break in between, but then I walked into this place.
You had to get, you had to take a...
I had to heal up.
You had to heal.
Uh, but I went into this place and immediately, and I, dude, what was the guy wearing? It was a guy and a girl, but what was the guy wearing?
Beret.
No, so not that French, what was he wearing as a shirt?
A jacket, a sweater vest.
No, he was wearing a black turtleneck.
Okay, that's pretty, that's exactly what I would expect.
And he's very like this, you know what I mean?
Ooh, okay.
Like, like just...
Like, did he look like he belo- like belonged at like an art exhibit?
Yeah?
Did he, please tell me he had a, like a mustache.
You know what he, eh, I don't think he did, but he, you know what he looks like? You ever see in, in Italian restaurants on the... This is very niche, but in Italian restaurants, like on the art on the wall, when they draw waiters and they have very like triangular, thin legs?
Yeah, it's like, it's like the shoulders and they come down.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Exactly like that, this guy.
Uh, and I understood, I understood.
No, you didn't, but you understood.
Stirred about like thirty percent of what he was saying, but you know, I got through.
Oh, he was like French.
French as shit.
Really?
Yeah, yeah, yeah. And the woman there was, I believe, American. But he was mostly helping me and not cheap. I'll say that.
Okay, I figured. Yeah, you're not going, you're not getting out of bed for anything that's not gonna cost a car payment.
I know Joey, okay?
The only reason why I went to the store, because I wanted, I wanted to get a good one. And I was like looking on Amazon.
Where was the store?
Madison. In Manhattan.
Oh, okay, alright.
Uh, Madison, Wisconsin.
I, well, you just said Madison and I was like alright.
Madison Avenue, I mean. Um, so I went and I, I, I go and I'm like, oh, I'm just like looking for a jacket and the guy's like, oh, you'll have a ski trip? And I was like, I can't do the accent.
You can't do it at all?
No, you do it.
You'll have a ski trip.
That's good. Yeah, well.
I lost it at the end.
And, and I was like, yeah, I'm, you know, I'm going to Switzerland. And then he was like, oh. He was like horny by that, right?
I mean, it.
He was horny.
Okay, alright, go ahead.
Yeah, I think that he was horny.
And then I saw like a couple of jackets and I'm like, oh, I really like this one. It was like this red jacket. So I have it on. Right? And I was like, yeah, I think this one, like I'll take this one.
And he's like, alright, cool, like.
Did it have like the suspenders on the inside that ski jackets have?
No, it didn't have that.
Ah, then it sucks.
Well, I bought it because I was like, I can wear this also, like, there were a couple of other colors, like, there was like a crazy green one that I was like, alright, if I buy this though, I'm never gonna wear like this bright green jacket.
I would, you know me.
Um, and and as I'm handing him, well, first I have the jacket on and I'm getting like kind of bullied into getting something else. Go ahead.
You.
Like yelled at me for not telling in a bridge version of watching Digimon and you're talking, you're walking me through trying on a jacket.
Right, right. No, I tried on the jacket.
That's the extent of that.
And now I'm being bullied into buying other shit though and I'm scared.
Oh, they did the classic sales associate thing where it was like.
They were good.
You know what would go great with that?
A new like Lamborghini.
Do you have a mid-layer? Or I don't know what that is.
Oh, it's the layer in the mid.
It's the middle layer.
It's the mid or layer.
I figured that, but I don't know what it looks like. And I was like, what is that? And he's like, oh, you gotta, you know, we have, we have these, we have these in this color. I was like, fuck. So I was like, oh, this looks nice. And I get it. And this is when I knew I was in trouble because I already said yes to the jacket.
And I handed them the jacket.
You didn't even see the price of the jacket.
I didn't.
Okay, here's the problem.
And I, and I grabbed the mid-layer and it's just like, it's nice. It's like a quarter zip and I'm like, cool. And I, and I'm like, oh, this is cool. I'll try it on. And then I tried it on. It looked good. So I was like, alright, cool. As I take it off and I'm giving back to the guy, I saw it. It said $280. I was like.
For the mid-layer?
And I was like, oh.
And, and, and you just felt it.
I was like shit.
Once it went, you knew you were locked in.
I was like, this isn't the place. If there was more people in the store, then I could be like, alright, bro, maybe not the mid-layer. How much is the jacket?
Well, if the mid-layer.
Was 280.
Uh.
It was 280 with tax. Now we're jacking up to three.
Now we're going to three.
We're jacking.
I'm saying the jacket's at least a grand.
Yeah, it was.
I think it was like 1600.
Holy shit. I'm letting you know right now.
I was.
If I didn't know you, I would fucking rob you blind.
Yo, the salesman can get me. I'm not good.
I love, you know what though? I get bullied by sales associates too because.
I'm, I'm bad.
Because in my head.
I automatically think, even if I know none of the inner workings of whatever establishment I'm in, I convince myself like, if I don't buy from this person, they're not gonna get commission, and then they're not going to feed their families. I'm not even thinking about commission. Or like, even like, there were stores I've been to where I go to the front, because there are some stores that'll be like, "Oh, tell them that Michael helped you out." Or "Tell them that Suzie helped you out." Then there are other stores I'll go to, and I'll be like, "Oh my god, I don't remember who helped me, it's..." And I'm sitting there, like, waiting to check out, like, looking for the person, and then it's like, that, because I feel bad, but yeah, I get bullied by sales associates too. Well, I just felt like, I was like, I had nowhere to go. There was two of them, they're both saying like, "Oh, it looks so good, you look great, you need this."
"Do you need any socks?" And I was like, "Bro, I just saw a $2.80, the socks are probably $80." "I'm not go- I'm not paying $80 for a pair of socks." I, I, I'll be honest with you though, you were already, you were already almost $2,000 in the hole. You might as well have commit, they should have, but, fuck them! They should have fucking thrown some free socks in there for you! They gave me a free bag? That doesn't help you. I know! I love when companies do that. They're gonna be like, "You know what, bro, there's a company..." A free bag? "What, am I gonna wear it on the way out instead?" This is so funny that you brought this up, because this just happened to me the other day. There's a company that I was looking at, uh, that sells watches, and it was like, if you spend, if your order total before taxes over this amount,
you get a free item. And I was like, "Oh, cool, like, what could the free item be? Could it, you know, like, some people will do like, you know, something to do with the item." Yeah. You know, like shoes, it'll be like, "We'll throw in a free shoe cleaning kit." You know, or we'll fucking throw in... Bro, it was like, if you spend over $400, or whatever it was, you get a free Bluetooth speaker. And it's like, why the fuck? I thought it was gonna be like, hand sanitizer or something. I mean, the same shit, it's just so unrelated to it. Same thing with you! Bag, a bag. Bag, bro. Bag! But like, bag! Bags! But like, a bag? Or like, a fucking bag? I haven't even taken out of the other bag that they gave me. So you, they put a bag in a bag? It's probably like, a bag like that, like a reusable shopping bag. I figured it would be like a tote or something.
They won't, they wouldn't give away a tote for free because their totes are probably like six grand.
No, no. Oh, I don't, I don't know. But, but they even said it might be itemized. So if you see that, just know that it's free. And blah, blah, blah. And I was like, at that point, I was like, you've already taken me for a ride. Basically $2,000.
You got rammed by the goat.
And then robbed.
Then you got double teamed by the sales associate that were riding you all the way to the bank.
Yeah, ram, rammed, ridden and robbed.
They got me, bro. And I was scared. I was like, I need to get out of here, bro. At least they, the woman did open the door for me on the way out. I would fucking hope so. I was like, I went and bought, uh, I went and bought, uh, what's it called? Uh, jewelry for Becca and the girls. And when we were in LA, I went and bought jewelry for Becca and the girls. And, uh, so they were like, "Do you want a bottle of sparkling water?" And I thought to myself like, no, I don't wanna, but then I thought like, "That's the least they could fucking do for me is give me a, a single bottle of sparkling water."
Like, how about a huge bottle of sparkling prosecco?
Yeah, how about a fucking lifetime supply?
So I can have liquid courage enough to spend this money. That'd be nice.
Well, there are places that will do that. Like they'll be, I remember when I went and, you know, I, for Radio City, I bought myself a watch. And in there, like there was someone there that was like popping champagne with one of the like sales associates there. And like, they do that shit.
Dude, that's never happened to me.
Yeah, it should've.
I've never been in a store where they're like, "Oh, you're buying something expensive? Let's sit down and have champagne."
They've offered it to me, but I've kindly declined.
No, I'm taking, I'm taking, I'll be like, yo, you guys have silverware or something I could leave with too?
Well, I, I have to drive a lot of the places I go. Like you live close enough to stuff that you can just hop on a train or an Uber. But like,
It's just the principle of like, Pour it, I won't drink it, but you've wasted it, fuck you.
Yeah, exactly, yeah, and it's always like a nice bottle, too. They're not doing like, you know, like a bottle of Cook's.
And like, when I really think about it, I know that the salesmen aren't in charge of the prices and, and they're not the ones robbing me, but I choose not to think about that in the moment, and I blame them. I go, yo, you, mister whoever.
Here's the thing, every problem in the world memes, needs a face, needs someone to take the fall for it. You know, anytime I get angry about big billionaires, you, you, I scream at you.
Right, right.
You know, and I understand, and how many times have you screamed at me for the immigration, like, problems in the world?
Zero, Frank.
Are you sure?
Jesus Christ, no, no, no, yeah, never. But, uh, no, yeah, and they are, say, bro, I'm serious when I say this, working at Target, like, softened me up with retail workers.
Yeah, oh my god, and I forgot.
No matter the layer, like, the level of, like, you know, I'm, I'm not gonna sit here and give fucking, like, you know, uh, uh, uh, uh, classes for retail workers, but like, anytime you see someone that works retail, be the nicest person possible, or even just customer service, because in that moment, they are probably thinking about the time they just got reamed out for something from some other piece of shit.
I got a text this morning, too, from the people.
From, from, uh, what, wait, what was the sales associate's name? The French one.
Claudia.
Claudia?
Oh no, that's the one who texted me.
Maybe it could have been just Claudia.
Gerard.
I, I don't remember the dude's name, uh, uh. It's like, oh, thanks for stopping in, have fun on your trip, and I'm like, okay, this is some cool customer service.
I was gonna say, I, I'll be honest, I, I'm a sucker for stuff like that.
Where they like, follow up.
Give it a week. Did your jacket rip? You probably need a new one!
Yeah, but, you know, they, I, I will say, my experience with, like, customer service has been mostly positive, but like, there, there, there are people that, that don't get that. You see the woman that, like, fist-fought a Chipotle, like, someone at a Chipotle? Did you see that shit?
That's such an insane sentence.
There was a woman at, like-
What could possibly happen in a fast food restaurant that would cause you to fight? An employee.
Some people are really into their food.
It's insanity.
One of my favorite videos that I've ever seen, and I know you know this video, is like, someone, I, I, I don't remember what fast food chain it was, it might have been Popeyes, but they went to a Popeyes and there was a girl behind the counter, she's like, "Can I help you today?" And the guy was just like, "I heard that you gave your number to my boyfriend." And then she's like, and then the person's like, "Don't you ever do that, get it?" And then they're like, all the workers come out behind, and she's like, "I'm gonna tell you something right now. You come in here, you say, 'Good morning.'" Yeah.
Damn dude!
And she's like, "No one's giving your boyfriend number." And, and the person was just like, "Anita!" And she's like, "Ho, ho, ho!" You're like, "You've never seen that video?" Damn, I'm not doing it any ser- like, any justice, but like...
Damn.
I, I, people, people get fucking moved.
Can you imagine you're gonna go in there, like, you hype yourself up to be like, "Yeah, I'm gonna go scream at this bitch", and you walk in there, and then the Popeyes Avengers come out, and you're like, "Fuck." You're like, "What am I gonna do?" You'd be like, "Shit, I'm about to get fucked up, but not only is my boyfriend getting a, a number from a random girl, but I'm gonna get my ass whipped by her."
The Popeyes Avengers is the funniest way to pick a fight.
They just like pop out, it's like...
Bum, bum, bum, bum, bum!
What the fuck?
That's the, that's the Avengers theme, done by Alan Silvestri.
Cool. Is that in your little commando underpants? What is it called? Condo- condom, was it? Commando? What the fuck is this?
I'm letting you...
Lizard?
I am letting you fall flat on your face here.
It's commando. Crocodile commando?
Sure. No, it's not, bitch. Creature commando.
Creatures!
That's in the DC. The Avengers is in the Marvel, although there's a little bit of crossover because the, all the DC right now is being run by James Gunn and Peter Safran.
We do have sponsors for this episode, uh, you know, we do have, uh, SeatGeek. SeatGeek is where you're gonna wanna get all your tickets, okay? Go download the app, it's the number one rated ticketing app in the App Store. Every time I'm at a... You know, a Ranger game, or a Knicks game, or anything like that, it's through SeatGeek. I'm buying tickets off of that website, or their app. But, I love their interface because it shows you, you know, what's a good ticket, what's a bad ticket, okay? It goes from like, dark red to dark green, and everything in between there. So it's just kind of like a little scale to let you know, this is a good price, this is a bad price, stay away from this. I like that they have that, okay? So, whenever you need to buy tickets, I would download SeatGeek, and you can save some money, alright? Uh, there's over 70,000 events listed on SeatGeek, that is a lot.
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It was kinda cool.
After using SeatGeek for so many years, and then you go on tour, and you're like, "Oh, we're on SeatGeek", that's pretty cool.
Uh, but yeah, anyway, you guys can save 10% off of any tickets, with the promo code basement2025, okay? Uh, but yeah, 10% off of your next set of tickets at SeatGeek, okay? So go download the app, uh, that is 10% off any tickets with the promo code basement2025, alright? So, uh, go enjoy that. And, lastly here, oh, that's not it, I fucked up. I completely fucked up, I clicked out of the thing that I absolutely needed. Frank, talk about something, please.
I will talk about anything, so as I was saying before, DC, the cinematic universe, and a lot of the-
Oh, anything but that, though.
Oh, really?
Okay, well, um, you know, I am really, uh, excited, you know, the spring is coming upon us, which means we are gonna be getting new spring teas, although the Spring Festival, which I don't wanna say-
Wait, tea does that?
Of course, baby. A lot of the most expensive and sought-after green teas are the first flush of green teas from the new spring season. But, you need to have the right, you need to know the right people.
Can you make a tea plant? This is dumb.
Of course you can, yeah, of course you can, but-
Why don't you do that?
Uh, you can, but it all depends on like, they thrive better in certain environments, and like, if you're putting it in a, just a giant pot, it might not yield the best results. Because as you know, the, the-
Tawar.
Tawar, what do you call it?
There it is, that's how I say it. But, you know, it all depends on the environment around it, and you know, a lot of times, the soil, and the area that the tea plants are in, are really gonna produce a really good yield, depending on what type-
Boy, I'm glad that's over with. Uh, we have, uh, to-
One of a kind, one of a kind this show ladies and gentlemen.
We couldn't fake it if we tried.
Oh my god. By the way, if I didn't stop you, that would have been 30 minutes.
Oh, 30?
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Listen babe, I've, I've said, we have spoken about this a lot lately, uh, because of the support and love that we've gotten from so many incredible people, we, we have a new studio that we're getting ready to go into. The lights are being put in, the sets are being built, uh, but I have asked you several times and it's still not gotten a straight answer, what, what, what the budget is for the tea station that I will build.
Um, what's, what, what the station, when you say station? Electric kettle, some tea equipment, some cups.
Equipment?
Yeah, cups.
What's equipment? Cups?
Cup, but like not cups, like teacups.
Teacups.
Teacups, uh, pitcher, something to brew in, and then an assortment of teas.
Let me ask you something.
You're the tea guy.
Yes, I am. One of them, there's a lot of.
You got a couple bucks in your pocket, you can't buy some teacups?
Oh, of cour- I have, I have a beautiful collection of teacups.
So then? Donate.
I have a beautiful collection of teacups that I use quite a, but, but listen, I'm not saying, you know, write it off as a business expense for the new studio.
You do that.
I'm not saying, but first of all, tea is a hobby is a not expensive hobby. You can get into some ridiculously expensive stuff, but like, you can get good teacups for not that much.
Frank, I just lost my whole net worth on a ski jacket. I can't afford to buy teacups right now.
What if I have a Frenchman come in here and basically?
Please don't do that!
Sales associate. The French will up sell me everything and I'll buy it.
Well.
Oh, man.
Really afraid to be in Paris.
By the way.
Paris, yeah.
Paris. Brother, you're going to Switzerland, which you and I know one of your hobbies and appreciations is the world of watches?
I really don't think there'll be a watch store where I am. It's like a ski town.
Okay, I can almost guarantee.
There might be.
That there's going to be something.
I'm not doing that.
I can almost also guarantee that you're gonna get this fucking itch, cuz you're in the land, like, you're gonna feel, you're gonna like, put your hand on the ground and feel it ticking away, like a tourbillon or something like that.
No longer know what you mean. What are you talking about?
Switzerland is the land of watches.
Oh, yeah, no.
You know, you're gonna feel, you're gonna feel that the, the second hand move as you put your hand to the ground and you touch the floor. You gotta touch the walls out there, bitch.
Also, the Swiss franc is like, better than the dollar, I believe.
Oh, so like, the franc is like a dollar?
I'd be getting rammed again, rammed and robbed.
I mean, if you're, if you're going to Switzerland, is, are you, if you're gonna get rammed anywhere.
It's amongst, it's amongst the Swiss Alps.
But also being in Paris is tough.
Probably.
If, are you gonna, please tell me, listen, I know you, you, you never have and you've expressed that you never have any desire to smoke cigarettes.
Promise me that if you smoke out there, you put it on a long stick.
Promise me, like, it could be, you could smoke whatever.
I have made a joke that I would, the first time I ever, like, took a drag of a cigarette would be in a buddy.
Off of a long stick? You kinda have to, sitting at a pâtisserie, you know, eating a croissant, you know? Like, you might as well.
Right?
Well, why not?
You know?
If I have like, a balcony that I find, it's like, ugh.
Are you gonna, you a hundred percent, you have to post a picture with the, the Ratatouille song?
What's the song?
You wait, you've never seen Ratatouille, right?
I've seen Ratatouille.
Oh, incredible.
You know what I watched yesterday?
Don't know why. Is it worse than Digimon?
Nothing is going to be worse than you watching Digimon.
Leaving your children and your wife in one room and being like, gonna go get an episode of Digimon.
This is great, but I gotta go Digimon.
You know what's funny is I tweeted, you won't care for the tweet, but go on.
Uh, what was I saying?
You watched something yesterday.
I'm, I'm like, sitting on the couch and I'm like, huh, cuz I'm always trying to think about like, what I'm gonna put on, uh, when I get in bed. Cloudy with a chance of meatballs.
Great movie, dude.
One of the most underrated mov- not that it was underrated.
The first movie, the second one is not as good. The first one is incredible.
When movies are really good, they make a second one, I'm very like, ah, I don't wanna, I don't wanna ruin it. But, I didn't know about that movie at all, and then I, my mom had it on at her house one day, and I was like, this is a fucking really nice movie.
It's hysterical, too. Like, it is done so well.
Also, I haven't seen it in years. The scene where, I mean, this is probably, I don't know if it's a niche scene, but I don't know how well you know the movie, but there's a scene where he's like, you know how like, docks have like, a ladder? So he's like, under the ladder, like, under the dock, like, just like, looking out like this? And, uh, Anna Faris's character comes and sits at the end of the dock and like, slams her feet down, they go in his eyeballs? Frank, I laughed audibly.
I laughed audibly, my neighbors were probably complaining.
Yo, that's a really good movie.
It's a good movie. If you haven't seen Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs, go watch it. Mr. T is in it!
Mr. T is in it. A lot of random people are in it.
Mr. T.
Bruce Campbell.
Bill Hader.
Bill Hader, Andy Samberg.
Uh, Andy Samberg, yeah. That's all I know.
Oh, now, now I gotta look up-
Who's, who's Bruce Campbell?
I believe he plays the mayor?
Who is that?
Uh, he was in, uh, Evil Dead, he's like, a frequent collaborator with, uh, Sam Raimi, he was in that show Burn Notice.
I don't know why I ask you questions. Like, I don't know if the famous person you're talking about, and I don't even-
You definitely know who this guy is if you saw him.
Probably by face.
You definitely know, I'm pretty sure. Uh, yeah, and if, Bruce Campbell was the mayor. This is Bruce Campbell, you know who this is.
Oh, is that the dad from Seventh Heaven?
Absolutely not, he is in prison, I believe.
Oh yeah, oh shit!
For fucking-
Oh yeah, that guy's weird as fuck!
Wait, wasn't he a pastor on that show?
Seventh Heaven is a very religious show, dude.
I don't remember it, I just remember the song.
There is, aw man, I wish I can give this person credit.
Wait, that guy's a dad, somewhere.
I- I'm sure in a bunch. James Ca- James Caan plays the main character's dad. Bill Hader's dad.
That's James Caan?
Yeah. Andy Samberg, Mr. T, um, uh, Neil Patrick Harris, Benjamin Bratt.
Who the fuck is Neil Patrick Harris?
Al Roker, Lauren Graham, Will Forte.
Wait, who does NPH play?
Neil Flynn. Um, NPH plays Steve.
He's the monkey?
He has one line the whole movie, "Steve", basically.
Yo, so the guys that made those mov- that- that first movie at least, Phil Lord and Chris Miller are- Those are the guys that did, like, they were the main, uh, creative forces behind, uh, Into the Spider-Verse, Across the Spider-Verse and stuff like that. Those guys are incredible.
Bangers.
Absolutely incredible.
Can you imagine it rained food like that?
Alright, I'm gonna give you three different weather phenomenons and you tell me what you want them to be for food. Alright, and don't just think of the movie, okay?
Rain?
Snow?
Tornado.
What do you want it to rain?
Uh, I would like it to rain...
I got a good one. I want it to rain colossal king crab legs.
I was gonna think liquid, I thought you were-
Ah, yeah, okay.
You want it to rain crab legs?
It doesn't rain liquid in that movie.
That's true.
It's cloudy with a chance of meatballs.
Right. Uh, what would it rain?
That's a good one, cuz they're kind of contained and when they hit the ground, you can still crack them open and they're like clean.
Something with a shell, something with a shell, that's a good answer.
Ooh, mussels.
Absolutely not.
I mean, I like mussels, but like, not like that. We're getting cold.
Oh, I know mine.
What?
It needs to be a very specific brand, but sunflower seeds.
That su- what are you, a bird? Seeds.
Like, that would make sense, they look like little water droplets.
You don't need it to rain, Dad, you go to the store, it's fine.
I know, but you could also go to the store and get anything, you can get a $2,000 jacket, bitch, it's not raining those.
Too soon. Um, damn.
I think I would have it rain, uh, ooh, did we say, no, no, no, no, I was gonna say hot dogs, but, oh, prosciutto?
You don't imagine it's raining prosciutto?
Dude.
I could just stick my hand out, out the window.
And just get a whole fucking, or like, just, just, but it needs to be good prosciutto, I'm not talking like-
No, no, top of the line.
Or even like jamon y berico?
I've never had it, I've never had it, but I'll take it.
What? Oh, yeah, wait, what, oh, yeah, yeah, I guess, how would you, yeah.
Alright, what about snow? Cuz snow, it accumulates.
Ice cream, ice cream.
Oh, oh, really?
Absolutely.
That would stink after it melted, dude, are you kidding me?
Yeah, but you've got, you've gotta put stuff in place, the government's gonna create something to get it away.
Okay, so you put down some tarps, or just bowls?
No, there's like trucks that come around and they clean it and they-
Alright, tornado.
Tornado in the movie was spaghetti and meatballs. Which looked really nice.
I, I, it does look very appealing.
Tornado of-
Maybe even like ginger ale.
Hold on, hold on, hold on, so you criticized me for it not raining a liquid? And then you're, you want a tornado, something that is famously not a liquid, to be ginger ale? I didn't say typhoon, bitch, you want a typhoon of ginger ale, that makes sense.
Wait, there's always rain involved in tornado, is there?
I don't, I've never, actually, I have been in one, and there was rain.
Frank, you weren't in a tornado.
Yes, I was.
No, you weren't.
Yes, I was. There was a tornado that touched down. I'm telling you.
Hold on. Was it one of those little like
Like on a baseball field?
No, I was in my car and my car was shifting.
Where?
In fucking Jersey, dude.
Get the motherfucker out of here!
You don't need to believe it, it is the truth.
I was in a tornado. What do you think, you're Helen Hunt relaxed, Bill Paxton?
I wish, I wish, I wish. You're also forgetting Philip Seymour Hoffman. Or Glenn Powell.
Glenn Powell, Glenn Pow.
That was all I, that's all I mean.
Alright, so tornado, you want ginger ale because you're an idiot.
Uh...
Snow, you want ice cream, and rain, you want...
What do you want for snow?
It's gotta be cold.
Mmm... Shrimp cocktail.
What? Frank, you worried about the snow stinking?
Yeah, you're right. You're right, you're right, you're right.
That's insane.
Alright, alright, shut up bitch. Um...
You know what was really good in that movie? The, this, the nacho pools. That was cool.
I don't, it is in the first one where, uh, where there's the, the pep- I, I've never had, and I don't care for like peanut brittle or a cashew brittle or stuff like that, but when it's like the, like the-
Spiky.
The spiky?
That looks so cool.
I wanna break it. I'll say this. If it got, you know how like when it gets cold outside, there'll be like running water and then it'll freeze over so like the top is frozen but underneath it's hollow?
And you could step in it and break it like glass?
Love that.
If that was like peanut brittle, I'd be so cool with that.
That'd be cool, but brownie brittle. Also, this makes me think of-
You're an adult, you don't need to have brownies.
That's an insane thing to say. You also think that peanut butter and jelly's for children, which is crazy.
They are absolutely for children.
But Digimon every morning is not for children. That's weird.
Not every morning, it's been three of the last five.
That's a lot. Okay, that's 60%.
Well, how else am I gonna watch the, you know, Ty and, and the crew, you know, basically go from this summer camp, you know, and then- Have all their Digimon Digivolve into champions, Digivolve into ultimates.
What's the? What's the best Digimon?
I mean, it really depends. I tweeted that-
Who's your fave?
You're gonna hate this tweet.
Oh my god, this is great.
I tweeted that you were either a Greymon kid or a Garurumon kid. And personally, I was a Greymon kid. War Greymon, dude.
But then also, you know, like, uh-
Who's like, who's like the, like, Blue Eyes White Dragon of Digimon?
I would say probably Greymon.
That's a, oh, that's an animal.
That's one of the Mons.
You know Greymon, you know Greymon.
I don't know Greymon. I do not.
You know Greymon, dude. It's like the, when people think of like the Pikachu-
That is the ultimate?
Well, then you could get into like War Greymon.
War Greymon.
You can get into, like, then he merges with like Metal Garurumon, like, that's a cool one.
Okay, that's, now we're getting cool. The other one was just like a fucking dinosaur, looked like Cubone.
Oh man, what was the name? Om- ah, Omnimon?
Amon Ra Saint Brown?
Ah, man, there's so many, there's so many I forgot. Um, you know, it's been a while, that's why I'm getting back into it.
It's been a while, it's been fucking thirteen hours probably, Frank.
What the fuck do you mean it's been a while?
It's been a while since I was like, super, super into it. When I was a kid, I watched everything. I had the toys, you know?
Yu-Gi-Oh, Blue Eyes White Dragon.
I was explaining Yu-Gi-Oh to Miles yesterday, I-
He doesn't like it?
He doesn't know it. I explained, so we were in the car and I was just like, um, hey, do you and your buddies like, talk at like lunch, like what you guys got for Christmas or the holidays? He was like, no, we don't do that anymore because we're cool. I was like-
Oh my god.
Oh, I was upset about that. And I was like, oh, what do you do at lunch? He was like, we just, kinda just talk. I was like, about what? He goes, it doesn't really, like, nothing. I was like, wow. We used to do, he didn't ask, but I told him what we did. I was like, we'd have Pokemon battles, or, you know, we'd trade Pokemon with the link cable. I was like, or we would play Yu-Gi-Oh. And he's like, what's that?
Oof, yo, that, the fucking Game Boy Yu-Gi-Oh, I used to-
I'll abuse it.
Um, I, and he was like.
Dark magician?
Dude, I wanted to be dark magician when I was younger.
Uh, I know because you were weird, but like, I was explaining to him, I was just like, dude, I had like, you know, like the Joey, Pegasus, Kaiba, Yugi starter packs and I made like my own conglomerate of a fucking deck. And he was just like, none of this makes any sense. And I was just like, um, Toon Dragon, Blue Eyes White Dragon.
Toon Dragon, wow.
Uh, what was it? Uh, Ultimate, what was the three headed Ultimate Dragon? What was that one? Blue Eyes Ultimate, Blue Eyes.
I don't remember.
Gate Guardian. Gate Guardian, Pot of Greed.
Pot of Greed.
You know, there was one that I remember liking a lot. Uh, and it was a.
Bro, speaking of Pot of Greed, I'm sorry, but I saw a clip on TikTok of that girl Drew. And she said that someone left a comment on one of her videos and said that she looked like the Pot of Greed.
I saw that too. Yeah, it was, uh, unbelievable dude. There was a card when we were kids. What was it called? The Water Emotics. I remember liking it.
What the hell is that?
It was just like a girl with water.
Oh, you would like that. You were like, oh, this is my girlfriend. She's a card.
Who am I dating? The Water Emotic. No, but then you remember, uh, Obelisk the Destroyer?
I, oh, yes!
Yeah, dude.
Oh, I wanna know.
Obelisk the Tormentor, excuse me.
I mean, you could have said anything and I would have agreed.
Obelisk the Tormentor.
I had that.
Then there was like the Golden Wing of Ra or some shit.
I love how you're like, oh, kind of like this and you're.
The Wing Dragon of Ra and then Slyfer the Sky Dragon.
So sick.
I'm gonna name my son that.
Slyfer?
You freak.
Damn, shout out to Yu-Gi-Oh.
Damn, yeah, we need to bring back Yu-Gi-Oh. We have.
Was that Japan?
Yeah. Oh, yeah.
It's always Japan.
We, it's always Japan. We have brought back so much. Uh, Hawaiian shirts.
We haven't brought back Yu-Gi-Oh.
Uh, Red Lobster.
We should both get the Game Boys and play Yu-Gi-Oh against each other.
I will absolutely do it.
I will too.
Cause I have a Game Boy. I just need the game. Don't fuck around here, Joey.
No, what's the other one? That's like sideways?
Game Boy Advance.
That's the one. That's what I had.
We can get the Game Boy SP with the backlight.
Frank is, his boner is bursting through his jeans right now. It ripped the zippers. I mentioned Game Boy SP with the backlight.
Not often do we get to talk about my hobbies on this show.
You know what I had? You know when Game Boys didn't have a backlight? So you buy the extender? It was like a book light.
I had this one that was like a, it was like steroids, because it had like a thing that went on the front for the buttons, and then it had a screen that popped out and it was a magnifier and then it had speakers on the side and shit like that.
Way too much, dude.
It was, it was for, it was overcompensating. You know what I'm talking about?
I am trying to understand. Damn dude, imagine some fucking Game Boys. Every like 6 months, I always like go on like eBay and I'm like, I need to get a fucking Game Boy Color.
Ah, don't even do it. I know a place.
Your basement? Like, I mean, yeah, I know they're there, Frank. I know a place. It's close.
No, there's actually a really good in Manhattan gaming spot. It's a little overpriced, but you can get some stuff there.
Hmm, I mean...
But ever since Logan Paul fucked it up for the rest of us, all this stuff is way overpriced.
Listen, man, I don't give a fuck if the price. If the guy's French, alright, I'll take it.
That's right. That's right.
That's called Full Circle.
No, it isn't. No, it isn't. No, it isn't. No, no. We have to leave here on him being an absolute marble-mouthed loser. Thank you guys for coming and hanging out. I appreciate it. Follow us at The Basement Art on all forms of social media. Go check out San Agato Studios. That video that we posted, the, uh, uh, the cooking competition was a lot of fun.
And, uh, check out Patreon. Uh, get ready for the new studio. All this stuff that's fun and exciting.
Yeah, just to let you guys know, like, you probably won't see an episode in the new studio because I am gonna be gone for a bit, so we have to like double up on episodes so they can still go out while I'm on vacation. But the second I get back, which is the end of January, why am I like this?
I don't know, you're a loser.
Then we're gonna start recording there. It's gonna look really cool. And, uh, that video that we, that you see on, uh, San Agato Studios, that's what we're gonna try doing, uh, moving forward, right? That type of quality in with the little fun games that we do, we want it to all look really good, so, uh, look forward to that. And that is all. See you guys next time.
Bye.
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