An Irish Goodbye, a big life event, and some serious blephing

On this week's Shagged Married Annoyed, Rosie has turned 40, Chris gets emotional over The Nutty Professor and there is a big life event that no-one was expecting! Plus, Rosie devises a new feature, Chris catastrophises over some DJ equipment and the couple start using the word bleph in all the wrong ways. All of this and some non-beefs, questions from the public and a voicemail involving a dating ick and Gru from Despicable Me! If you want to get involved and have your stories and voice notes included on the podcast, then get in touch! 📧: [email protected] 📱: 07874 406650 You can watch the podcast on the Shagged Married Annoyed YouTube channel: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠youtube.com/@shagged.married.annoyed Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

• 0:00Speaker 00

  Coming up on this week's episode of Shagmire and Annoyed.

• 0:02Speaker 01

  We chat watching 90s movies with your kids.

• 0:04Speaker 00

  We've been hitting it hard, guys.

• 0:06Speaker 01

  Hard. There's been a birthday, there's been a wedding of multiple nights. We're feeling it a bit, but we're here for you.

• 0:13Speaker 00

  We've got a very exciting announcement.

• 0:15Speaker 01

  Very, very exciting personal life announcement. We didn't see it coming.

• 0:18Speaker 00

  No.

• 0:19Speaker 01

  If anything, it was forced upon.

• 0:20Speaker 00

  We've got no beefs this week and you're gonna hear why.

• 0:23Speaker 01

  And as always, we've got voice notes and emails from you lovely lot.

• 0:26Speaker 00

  Enjoy.

• 0:28Speaker 02

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• 0:58Speaker 00

  Hello, you are listening and maybe watching Shagmire and Annoyed with me, Rosie Ramsey, and my husband, Christopher Ramsey.

• 1:04Speaker 01

  Hello.

• 1:04Speaker 00

  Hello, guys.

• 1:05Speaker 01

  Hello. If we sound a little bit raspy, it's because we've just been to a two-day wedding.

• 1:11Speaker 00

  Oh.

• 1:12Speaker 01

  And it was Rosie's 40th weekend.

• 1:14Speaker 00

  Oh.

• 1:15Speaker 01

  Basically, lot of salads, lot of veg, lot of water on the horizon for the detox.

• 1:21Speaker 00

  I was gonna say, because that has not been.

• 1:23Speaker 01

  No, no, no, no, that they're on the horizon for the detox.

• 1:26Speaker 00

  I haven't stirred a wooden spoon in a pan for days.

• 1:33Speaker 01

  What an incredibly specific.

• 1:36Speaker 00

  No, it's been.

• 1:36Speaker 01

  How, how is she? Asia's not doing well. Do you know, she hasn't stirred a wooden spoon in a pan for over a week. She's in a bad way.

• 1:46Speaker 00

  I am, I'm so.

• 1:48Speaker 01

  Tell you what she's done lots of though, peeling plastic off the top of cartons, et cetera and such.

• 1:53Speaker 00

  Opening the boxes.

• 1:55Speaker 01

  Paying the delivery driver.

• 1:56Speaker 00

  Yeah, we have takeaway cities, but it's fine.

• 1:59Speaker 01

  We had two takeaways in a row the other, the other day. We had a Chinese on the Saturday and then we had an Indian on the Sunday.

• 2:04Speaker 00

  We haven't done that for years.

• 2:05Speaker 01

  Disgusting. I had a spot the next day.

• 2:07Speaker 00

  I had two, mate, I had two spots and I was like, I had two spots and I could have done with a bleh.

• 2:13Speaker 01

  Bleh?

• 2:14Speaker 00

  A bleh.

• 2:15Speaker 01

  A bleh?

• 2:15Speaker 00

  A lower bleh.

• 2:16Speaker 01

  A bleh?

• 2:16Speaker 00

  Just where they cut out this bit of your eye.

• 2:18Speaker 01

  Oh, right. That's, it always sounds like a sex thing.

• 2:20Speaker 00

  Bleh?

• 2:21Speaker 01

  A bleh, yeah.

• 2:22Speaker 00

  What do you think it would be?

• 2:23Speaker 01

  Bleh, I fucking tits off last night.

• 2:26Speaker 00

  Bleh you in the next week.

• 2:28Speaker 01

  Last time that guy, she came around yesterday, bleh that fucking back doors out.

• 2:32Speaker 00

  No, I think it's more of like a, it would be like a bleh in our face. Do you know what I mean? It is, it's more of a release, it's not the, it's not the action, it's the bleh.

• 2:42Speaker 01

  Bleh all over our back.

• 2:43Speaker 00

  Bleh.

• 2:44Speaker 01

  Fair enough. This has gone really vi- and it's not even, it's gone really rude and it's not even really rude because we're not even using the right word.

• 2:50Speaker 00

  Introduction, I'm cold.

• 2:52Speaker 01

  You're always cold. I swear, I'm telling you, again, people in London who've had this, this heatwave, that's, that's, that's just finished. Bless yous, blef yous, because.

• 3:05Speaker 01

  Because.

• 3:07Speaker 00

  Okay, all right, this is a new thing. From now on, it's not bless, it's bleh.

• 3:12Speaker 01

  Bleh, okay, so just say, so say how long it takes people to notice, I mean, they'll hear it on here.

• 3:15Speaker 00

  And we'll be like, oh, bleh them.

• 3:17Speaker 01

  Oh, bleh them.

• 3:18Speaker 00

  Bleh.

• 3:18Speaker 01

  Blef yous, little cotton socks. Yeah, I'm sick of it. I wake up every night boiling and I take the duvet off and I just lie there with no duvet on. And a duvet is essentially a comfort, so to have some, it makes you a bit of a go to sleep. Easy, it stops the demons. So it's, it, I don't know, it's like going to sleep without it on is really difficult. Ah, I'm sick of being hot. I'm fucking sick of being hot. You're always cold, it's horrible.

• 3:42Speaker 00

  I'm not always cold. I was just, so you were, you were boiling last night, I was perfect temperature. I like getting a bit of a sweat between me breasts when I'm asleep. I do, I like to be a bit sweaty. It's a better, I hate being cold. I'd rather be hot.

• 3:57Speaker 01

  I love being cold in bed. I'd rather be cold in bed than hot in bed.

• 3:59Speaker 00

  Cold in bed?

• 4:00Speaker 01

  Yeah, because you can just boil.

• 4:01Speaker 00

  No, you can't sleep, man.

• 4:03Speaker 01

  Like, tuck the duvet around you like a little sausage roll. Sometimes if you, if you've got a double bed, or, you know, or dare I say an even bigger bed. And you're really cold, if you climb out of your duvet and lie on top of it and then roll the other half on you, it like doubles the, the heat. It's like sausage roll yourself, it's class. I love.

• 4:21Speaker 00

  That's a two, I think, surely. You couldn't be doing that in a bedroom, eh?

• 4:23Speaker 01

  No, of course, if you're on your own. I, I do it, me naps on tour, if I get a hotel early enough and I need a nap, whoa, on top of the bed, duvet over. Inexplicably, Big Bang Theory always on the telly at that time.

• 4:35Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 4:36Speaker 01

  Every time I check in a hotel, I turn the telly on, Big Bang Theory's on. So, yeah. What, yeah, what you done? You bit the side of your mouth?

• 4:41Speaker 00

  No, just, I did, I like pressed down on my tooth and it went dead sensitive.

• 4:46Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 4:47Speaker 00

  Oh, that's fucking, there's a, there's an obsess in the post.

• 4:49Speaker 01

  That's it, yeah. You have been living it up. You have been living it up. Anyway, guys, we'll talk more about that wedding and everything that's been going on, some, some, some unbelievable gossip from that wedding coming your way. Rosie's over the moon about it, but listen, before further.

• 5:03Speaker 00

  I could have a breakdown.

• 5:04Speaker 01

  Yes, we're very, very much looking forward to explaining it, because we were talking about it last night, laughing and said, well, at least it's content for the podcast, so you will hear that soon. And but before further ado, it's time for this week's lucrative, lucrative sponsor. But not before I say thank you so much for listening and watching and all of that stuff. If you're a brand new listener, hello and welcome. If you're a repeat listener, hello and thank you. Thought of that yesterday when I was having a wee, wrote it down, remembered it, boom. Doesn't work as well when I tell you that bit. Listen, it is time for this week's.

• 5:29Speaker 00

  Hello and welcome, hello and thank you. It's not like, sorry.

• 5:33Speaker 01

  Just gonna be my new thing.

• 5:34Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 5:34Speaker 01

  That's fine, no, just shit on it, that's fine.

• 5:36Speaker 00

  It's just not that, it's not that impressive.

• 5:38Speaker 01

  You looked, you looked at me there and you smiled when I said it. If you're a new listener, hello and welcome.

• 5:42Speaker 00

  You don't need to explain it.

• 5:43Speaker 01

  I'm gonna say it again. If you're, if you're a repeat, look, you've thrown us off. Right, that's it.

• 5:50Speaker 01

  Honestly, you're gonna get a good bleh off me if you don't fucking sort yourself out. This week's lucrative, lucrative sponsor is the genuine anxiety you feel when watching a 90s movie with your children that you haven't watched for a while. It's, we are starting to knock them out now with the kids, watch The Goonies. Goonies was fair enough, couple of bits that were a little bit scary, dead body in the fridge, had to cover brave's eyes. And there was one on The Goonies.

• 6:20Speaker 01

  Good. So, you didn't get that, did you?

• 6:22Speaker 00

  I wasn't listening. I was thinking about what I'm gonna say.

• 6:25Speaker 01

  Great, that's nice. No, it's a really good part of being a conversationalist, that, just thinking about your bit and not even listening to mine. No, it's class, yeah, great. Fucking wedding vows or something. Listen, we watched.

• 6:35Speaker 00

  Nutty Professor?

• 6:36Speaker 01

  Yeah, that, what I was gonna say, that, that 90s Ozempic documentary, but yeah, Nutty Professor. We watched that with the kids.

• 6:43Speaker 00

  Yep.

• 6:43Speaker 01

  Terrifying, because I was like, I'm sure this is fine. Dare, dare I say it? Dare I say it? What was it, a 12 when we were kids?

• 6:50Speaker 00

  12.

• 6:52Speaker 01

  Probably wouldn't even get made now. He drops, he drops the N-word six times in the first.

• 6:55Speaker 00

  We had to have a full conversation to Robin about the N-word, which I didn't expect yet.

• 6:58Speaker 01

  Six times or so in the first 35 minutes, which I couldn't believe it. The story doesn't actually get going until 35 minutes in.

• 7:05Speaker 00

  I mean, I, I, it's a great film.

• 7:06Speaker 01

  I mean, it's amazing, his performance is so good that it actually hooks the kids. It hooked them. Literally, the inciting incident doesn't happen until 35 minutes into the film. It's insane.

• 7:14Speaker 00

  They loved it.

• 7:15Speaker 01

  But yeah, they loved it. But it's, oh, all of them though, all of these, I'm sure I've mentioned it before, but all these films.

• 7:22Speaker 00

  Well, I really wanna watch, I wanna watch Liar Liar with him, but you were like the Kant.

• 7:27Speaker 01

  And Ace Ventura.

• 7:28Speaker 00

  Right.

• 7:29Speaker 01

  Liar Liar maybe a bit more than Ace Ventura, probably a lot more. Ace Ventura, Rosie, the entire fucking plot is that the woman is a man.

• 7:40Speaker 00

  In what?

• 7:41Speaker 01

  In Ace Ventura, spoiler anyone. The woman at the end is a man. The detective he was working with and he, I think he sleeps with her, he kisses her and then there's this whole scene where he's like washing his mouth and at the end, the, the whip actually skirt off and just got like, you say a run down way and there's a.

• 7:55Speaker 00

  I don't remember that. See, but that's, kids don't actually, so I, I didn't know that about that.

• 7:59Speaker 01

  But it's like, you could never make that film now. That, the whole plot is, and now we're like, okay, like, do you know what I mean? It's insane. So.

• 8:08Speaker 00

  Well, what about Liar Liar? I only wanna watch Liar Liar because Jennifer Tilly's in it.

• 8:12Speaker 01

  Who's Jennifer Tilly?

• 8:13Speaker 00

  Jennifer Tilly is the main woman in Liar Liar.

• 8:16Speaker 01

  The ma'am?

• 8:16Speaker 00

  The ma'am.

• 8:17Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 8:17Speaker 00

  And she's now a Real Housewife of Beverly Hills.

• 8:21Speaker 01

  Watch on your own, will you? Oh, you watch it. Just watch it with a little notepad and a clipboard, right down the wall, yeah. See all the swears, I wanna, bar and gate chart, I wanna know how many S's, how many F's.

• 8:32Speaker 00

  I don't mind the shits and the bogas and the bloody, don't mind them, they're fine, but.

• 8:36Speaker 01

  But one thing I did notice when watching The Nutty Professor, if you're a millennial, if you're our age and you're watching Nutty Professor when you're a kid. Something I noticed when watching it that made it quite sad as a backstory.

• 8:47Speaker 00

  Right.

• 8:47Speaker 01

  When they go to the comedy club the second time and Reggie, the Dave Chappelle character comes out.

• 8:53Speaker 00

  Women be shopping.

• 8:54Speaker 01

  Yeah, and he has the, and he has the, when Eddie Murphy's Buddy Love, not Sherman Club anymore, and he hammers him with all of those fat jokes. I realised the only reason Buddy Love knows such an arsenal of incredible your mama's so fat jokes is because Sherman has heard them his entire life.

• 9:14Speaker 00

  That really, that really triggered you, didn't it?

• 9:16Speaker 01

  It ruined me night. I literally sat there and I was like, oh bless his heart. And it's never explained and it's took me 25 years to work that out. He only knows all of them because he's heard them about himself and about his ma'am.

• 9:28Speaker 00

  Really upset you, didn't it? Our kids are gonna know loads as well.

• 9:33Speaker 01

  I'll say them about you.

• 9:39Speaker 01

  Hey, let's get on.

• 9:40Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 10:02Speaker 00

  Hello and welcome back to this week's episode.

• 10:04Speaker 01

  Hello. Hello, hello, hello.

• 10:09Speaker 00

  I'm making the most of Rosie because it's gonna get cold soon and Rosie is gonna be dead in my house.

• 10:15Speaker 01

  You cannot drink Rosie when there's leaves on the ground. I just don't think you can do it.

• 10:20Speaker 00

  No, nah.

• 10:21Speaker 01

  And I never thought of that.

• 10:22Speaker 00

  I couldn't, you know, I just physically couldn't. I struggle actually to drink white.

• 10:26Speaker 01

  See, I feel the same about, I feel the same about Modelo with a lime in it or a Corona with a lime in it.

• 10:32Speaker 00

  Two summery.

• 10:32Speaker 01

  See someone with a Corona and a lime in it in December or at a Christmas party, I go, what the fuck are you doing?

• 10:37Speaker 00

  Tragic.

• 10:38Speaker 01

  Leave that for the summer, enjoy it. Get a hobby, get a Hoppy Pilsner, maybe an IPA, maybe a Guinness or a red wine.

• 10:46Speaker 00

  Oh, a Guinness, nice.

• 10:47Speaker 01

  A Guinness or a red wine or a Hoppy Pilsner.

• 10:49Speaker 00

  Yeah, I agree. I agree.

• 10:51Speaker 01

  A neck oil or something, get that down you. Get their lime out with it. It's just to stop the flies. There's no flies.

• 10:55Speaker 00

  No, there's no flies in December.

• 10:57Speaker 01

  Get it out. Stop it.

• 10:59Speaker 00

  I'd be glad I know flies, don't I? Fucking had them flies. Oh god, I hate flies.

• 11:03Speaker 01

  Hell on, absolute hell on. Anyway, listen, so the wedding gossip, so we went to-

• 11:10Speaker 00

  Because I can't even look at myself.

• 11:12Speaker 01

  You're beautiful, you're gorgeous, stop it. We went to our, one of my dear friends weddings, it was a two day affair in Carlisle. How sad you look. And we went with another one of me, but we shared a cottage with Jordan, who's been mentioned many times on the podcast. We shared a cottage with Jordan and his partner Shannon and their little, tiny little baby. It's a two week old little baby, Oakley.

• 11:34Speaker 00

  And Chris very much stolen for the first day.

• 11:37Speaker 01

  Yeah, we kind of chipped in and like sat at the corner of the wedding and like we all took turns with them and you know, it was lush and you were-

• 11:43Speaker 00

  It's like close friends. He's like, you know, it's not just a random person's baby.

• 11:46Speaker 01

  And you were like, dare I say it, I mean, I was like, she's gonna steal your baby, Jordan. Like Rosie is gonna steal your baby. You have to keep an eye on her. So when you, you had him a lot. Yesterday, on the second day of the wedding, we were sitting out, were you sitting inside when it happened? Cause I only heard the aftermath. I'd been to the toilet and I came back.

• 12:02Speaker 00

  Oh, I was hit with this.

• 12:05Speaker 01

  A lady came over, didn't she?

• 12:06Speaker 00

  I was on the dance floor. It was mid dance. The band had started, it was mid dance. It hit me like a ton of goddamn bricks.

• 12:13Speaker 01

  And she said to you, do you wanna say it word for word? Cause I didn't hear it word for word.

• 12:17Speaker 00

  I can't fully remember word for word, but basically, in a nutshell, this lady thought that Chris and I were this baby's grandparents.

• 12:29Speaker 01

  Imagine that. Imagine that. So Shannon-

• 12:33Speaker 00

  Imagine that also, just imagine that, two days after your 40th birthday.

• 12:39Speaker 01

  Listen, so we've both had tough 40th birthdays, right? So two days after your 40th birthday, were they? Shannon's, you know, thirty two, gorgeous.

• 12:47Speaker 00

  Cannot be my daughter.

• 12:48Speaker 01

  Doesn't look young enough to be your daughter. Let's be perfectly honest here, really doesn't. Unless you were like one of them, you know, you know, the girl who got pregnant in year eight. Unless you were her, right? We all knew one, you know, but you weren't.

• 13:00Speaker 00

  Still absolutely impossible, I think.

• 13:03Speaker 01

  Uh, yeah. You'd have, no, yeah, you couldn't.

• 13:05Speaker 00

  No, I'd have been eight.

• 13:06Speaker 01

  Yeah, you'd have been eight. Sorry, I was thinking you'd be 12. No, you'd be eight. Yeah, it's impossible. Absolutely. Even, even in the north, and that's saying something. So you had that, so she, I mean, she was mortified, the lady who said it. She was absolutely mortified. And the funniest bit was, I went, I went, I went, right, I went, so you thought I was the granda? She went, yeah. I went, you thought Rosie was the grandma? She went, yeah. I went, and you thought Shannon was our daughter? She went, yeah. And I pointed at Jordan, I went, who the fuck did you think he was? She went, I didn't even know he existed.

• 13:36Speaker 01

  Fucking baby's dad.

• 13:38Speaker 00

  Changed, changed every nappy by the way. Made, made every bottle, changed every nappy, very much held him. Literally, he pushed that buggy all around that venue. Very much the dad.

• 13:52Speaker 01

  So I was like, obviously for the rest of the night, I was like, and you, you piece of shit, knocking my daughter up and doing a runner, yeah, I'll have you.

• 13:59Speaker 00

  Well, it spread like wildfire as well. Cause people were just coming over, calling his nana, laughing their heads off.

• 14:05Speaker 01

  Laughing, yeah. He was horrible. But that's so, so we've had some other things here.

• 14:10Speaker 00

  I'm getting a full, no, I'm not.

• 14:12Speaker 01

  So we've had some other things here though. So this happened to you, just after being 40, hits you like a ton of bricks. I had to do Celebrity Gladiators on the weekend of my 40th against a 25 year old. Dare I say it, he came fourth in Strictly, George Clark. He's an absolute, not, I had not amazing spaces, a different George Clark, the YouTube one. He's a, he's a hench young man.

• 14:32Speaker 00

  Well, we're not 25 anymore.

• 14:33Speaker 01

  Fit and athletic. And I can't give anything away about Celebrity Gladiators, but I'm telling you right now, not, not happy about being up against a 25 year old on the weekend of me 40th. Again, baptism of fire. So welcome to your 40s.

• 14:45Speaker 00

  Fuck me.

• 14:45Speaker 01

  Couple of old fuckers.

• 14:46Speaker 00

  Jesus Christ. In her defence, in the lady's defence, because she was very, she was like devastated. And she was like, I'm so sorry.

• 14:52Speaker 01

  It was very funny.

• 14:53Speaker 00

  And I was like, yeah, but you still said it though, didn't you? But anyway, in her defence, if I'd had Shannon when I was 19, I could be a grandma. Like, it is a thing. You know, my cousin Nina has got a grandson because she had her daughter when she was 19. And then her daughter had a child when she was like 19, 20. So yes, it is possible, but-

• 15:15Speaker 01

  You don't wanna hear it on a night out.

• 15:16Speaker 00

  It's, I don't wanna hear it on a night out when I'm not a grandparent and I haven't lived that experience of having a child at 19. And the possibility, and it just hit us like a ton of goddamn bricks. And then she came back later, she went, I've just found out that you do have children, but they're only 10 and five. And I was like, god, can you believe it? God, what an old bitch. I was like, please stop.

• 15:42Speaker 01

  It didn't affect me at all. I was just laughing my head off. But yeah, I'm sorry, that must have been, that must have been really awful.

• 15:46Speaker 00

  But I think I was just, do you know when you just don't feel your age at all? No, but I think it just hit, I was like, it just hit us like a slap in the face. I was like, you honestly think I'm this person's, I'm this baby's grandparent? Like, what the fuck?

• 16:00Speaker 01

  Well, she said actually, the lady who said it. So the lady who said it was older than us. The lady who said it was older than us and she said, I'm really sorry. She went, I don't know how old anyone is. She went, in my head, I think I'm still 30. And I was like, I feel the same. I was like, cause when I was at, when I was at Gladiators, there was me and there was George and there was another lad there as well. And they were in like, one of them was 24, one of them was 25. And I remember thinking, hey, we're all, we're all like peers. Yeah, we're all peers. And then I thought, no, I could be both of your dads. I could literally be both of your fathers. It's fucking horrible.

• 16:29Speaker 00

  So we need, actually, we just need to grow up and maybe we need to just get into a world where we could be grandparents. Just honestly, just hit us like a fucking slap in the face.

• 16:37Speaker 01

  To be fair though, I was hobbling and handing out Wetherspoons originals, so I probably didn't do much for your cause. But that's the thing though.

• 16:43Speaker 00

  I didn't have a bra on, it might have been that. It was, it was me tits, wasn't it? Me tits absolutely, that's what it is.

• 16:51Speaker 01

  Dare I say it, they looked fantastic. So no, I don't think it was that. I don't think it was that.

• 16:55Speaker 00

  Also, I was rocking a three day, a three day drinkathon. So I probably did look a bit haggard. Yeah, okay, fair enough.

• 17:00Speaker 01

  No, it's the thing though, you're dressed in your best at a wedding. You don't want someone, the first time you're accused of being a grandparent, you don't want it to be at a wedding when you're dressed in your best. You're like, what the fuck do I look like in the supermarket?

• 17:08Speaker 00

  You wanted, you wanted to be walking around Tesco with no makeup on. Not, Jesus Christ.

• 17:16Speaker 00

  And no, but no, sorry, just a last thing. She was like, because she kept digging a, digging a even bigger hole, bless her. And she was like, you were just looking so, you were doting on that baby so much. I was like, yeah, because me ovaries still work very much. And I actually thought about having another one. Cause I'm so broody.

• 17:32Speaker 01

  Oh, that knocked the broodiness, it weirded and knocked the broodiness on the head actually. So I can thank that lady for that. It completely killed the broodiness. Cause you'd be at the, you'd be at the school gates, you'd be at the school gates when the kid's five and you'll say, here, she'll say, ma'am, and everyone will go, everyone will go, ma'am? Fucking hell, I thought your nana was picking you up.

• 17:54Speaker 00

  Yeah, there you go. But bless her, no. And if she, and if she does listen to this by any chance, it would, were fun and like, it was just one of them daft things. Blef, blef you.

• 18:09Speaker 03

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• 18:40Speaker 01

  So just a couple of our little tidbits or tidbits, however the fucking hell you say it. I've been saying it wrong my whole life and I don't know what the right one is.

• 18:47Speaker 00

  I think it's tidbits. Is it tid, oh god, I don't actually know, tidbits?

• 18:50Speaker 01

  Tidbits, tidbits, tidbits. I don't know. Listen, who gives a fuck? First of all, I knew the singer from the wedding who was doing, it was Glenn Ruffhead. Who does, if you're from the North East and you've ever come to any of the Laughs for Kids gigs, Glenn does the music and stuff. He's a very talented man. He was amazing at the wedding. I think it's hard to not be overpowering as it may be as a singer.

• 19:11Speaker 00

  Oh, he was great. I was so impressed.

• 19:12Speaker 01

  It was like the perfect vibe. Unreal. Anyway, he told me a really funny story.

• 19:14Speaker 00

  He's actually doing our-

• 19:16Speaker 01

  He's doing Jordan's as well.

• 19:17Speaker 00

  He's doing our, our Ben's wedding.

• 19:19Speaker 01

  He's doing our son's. Yeah, he's doing our daughter's wedding to Jordan. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He told me that he was at a wedding a little while ago.

• 19:28Speaker 00

  Oh, you told me this and I totally forgot. This is wonderful.

• 19:33Speaker 01

  There was one good thing I took from the story, which is I think these two people found, they found the right person. Cause they both have the audacity to do this at their wedding. So they told him that, can you please make an announcement to everyone? So the daytime had done and the nighttime was starting and he was doing the thing. Can you make an announcement to everyone at the wedding that we're gonna do Irish goodbyes? So, under no circumstances does anyone come up to us while we're having fun at our wedding and tell where you're going and say goodbye. Just go, we don't wanna hear it.

• 20:08Speaker 00

  That, like.

• 20:09Speaker 01

  Both of them, the bride and the groom, make sure you tell everyone that. But, buffet's open. You know, tell anyone if they're parked outside, blocking people in, and also tell them all to fuck off without speaking at the end of the night.

• 20:21Speaker 00

  Wow.

• 20:21Speaker 01

  Outstanding behaviour. I respect it.

• 20:24Speaker 00

  Kinda love it.

• 20:24Speaker 01

  I fully respect it. Just because I'm a prick sometimes.

• 20:27Speaker 00

  Yeah, oh, you would love that, but I would never, ever say.

• 20:30Speaker 01

  I didn't say goodbye to anyone last night. I said goodbye to Shaun, the groom. I said goodbye to him and someone else was standing next to him. And I went, oh yeah, bye to you as well. And I was gone. I was waiting outside. Yeah, so that would be, yeah, I, I, dare I say it, I maybe should have married that bride who said that to him.

• 20:45Speaker 00

  Maybe.

• 20:47Speaker 01

  You, can you imagine? They must have sat and went, you know what we could do? You know how, you know how we hate saying goodbye to people? We could get the singer to just tell everyone, under no circumstances, say goodbye.

• 20:58Speaker 00

  Yeah. Don't, don't come to work on the dance floor. It is, it is a chore. I mean, it's your party.

• 21:06Speaker 01

  Yeah. Someone's come, you, you, you're standing there, the beat, it's, the beat's just about to kick in on a song, you know?

• 21:12Speaker 00

  But this is what I think, like weddings and that have changed over the years because once upon a time, it was, everybody come together who we love to celebrate our union. And now it's, everybody come together to just watch us do this thing and don't speak to us when we leave.

• 21:27Speaker 01

  Don't post photos on social media and don't you dare say goodbye on the way out or you're, it could be fair though, can you ima, there might be like proper partyers. Do you know what I mean? They might have been full of drugs and that and absolutely buzzing. Can you imagine like they're on the dance floor and that fucking, you know, that turned down for what?

• 21:40Speaker 00

  Turned down for what?

• 21:42Speaker 01

  But before that, it was like.

• 21:48Speaker 01

  Exactly, yeah. Anti fucking Doris. Right, yeah, thank you love, yeah, thank you, yeah, we'll speak to you, I'll speak to you tomorrow.

• 21:58Speaker 01

  We'll speak, doodle, doodle, we'll speak to you tomorrow, we'll speak to you tomorrow, go back, oh, fuck's sake.

• 22:06Speaker 01

  Yeah, okay, okay, bye. You missed the bass drop, yeah. Glenn, can you play that again? Can you play that again? This, oh fuck, I just ruined it.

• 22:15Speaker 00

  Yeah, do you know what?

• 22:16Speaker 01

  I'm fully on board with it. Fully on board with it. Can't even imagine how unbearable that must have been to listen to us as a podcast, but it'll work on the video. So maybe go on YouTube and watch that little skit.

• 22:27Speaker 00

  Maybe you get more of your money here. Do you know what I mean? Just two old codgers trying to make a living.

• 22:32Speaker 01

  We're just too old. We're just two old guys, two olds, just a couple of old farts, just a couple of.

• 22:38Speaker 00

  Well, I have noticed, we've, we've actually made a really good, what's the word? Oh.

• 22:43Speaker 01

  Observation?

• 22:44Speaker 00

  Kind of an observation, but also, so your awkwardness and just all around, like you really have to try to be friendly. Okay?

• 22:54Speaker 01

  I talk about it in my new tour. That sounds, that makes it sound bad. When I'm on stage, I'm so used to being on stage and being, you're in control of everything. But then when I'm in a social situation and you're not in control of it, I do, and it's not for being an asshole, it's just sometimes I'm, I'm not great. I'm, I'm not great in social situations sometimes. And I can't hide, I can't hide when I'm not up for it. I think is the best way of describing it. Would you agree?

• 23:18Speaker 00

  Yes, I would agree. But I mean, I don't mean that horribly because you are, you're fine. Like it's, you know, but unfortunately you married somebody who, like I love, I need social interaction. I need like friends and I need to, I need to kind of have like a village to be around people. But and you, and you do, well, you've got a lot better.

• 23:37Speaker 01

  I, yeah, but we've talked, you're, you're well mannered to the point of it being like, you know, a genuine problem, to the point of it being like an actual crutch. Like you would.

• 23:47Speaker 00

  I have a crippledly good manners.

• 23:48Speaker 01

  That's what I'm trying to say.

• 23:49Speaker 00

  I mean, that, that woman yesterday, I really should have went, are you, what the fuck are you talking about? Me, what, my grandchild, are you taking a piss? I'm not a nana.

• 23:58Speaker 01

  Can I just say, I think a lot of people listening would have done that.

• 24:00Speaker 00

  Well, I didn't. I went, eh, God, oh, no, it's just, it's just me, it's just me friend.

• 24:07Speaker 01

  These are happy tears.

• 24:08Speaker 00

  It's just me friend, so, and I'm, I'm forty, I just turned forty. I know I, I don't get botox what my friends do and I'm trying not to. But anyway, yeah, so no, it's fine. I know, I'm on the telly and I look old as fuck on there as well. So no, anyway, I could have done that, but I didn't. I was really nice. But back to me observation, well, me and you, we're made like this thing, right? So when we are older and when we are actually real grandparents, Chris loves leaving a party early. So you will be the babysitter of the kids.

• 24:39Speaker 01

  Take the kids home.

• 24:40Speaker 00

  And I'll stay till the bitter end.

• 24:42Speaker 01

  Hundred percent. All the kids are tired, I don't, I don't wanna take them, I'm having a party. Right here, didn't, didn't wanna fucking come in the first place.

• 24:50Speaker 00

  Half past day, he'll be done.

• 24:51Speaker 01

  Kids, let's go and watch a film.

• 24:52Speaker 00

  Yeah, so there you go.

• 24:54Speaker 01

  Cheese on toast or cereal or toast for, for supper and let's watch a telly and go to sleep because I didn't even wanna come to this.

• 25:00Speaker 00

  Your nana will be in at half past one.

• 25:01Speaker 01

  Should be, yeah.

• 25:02Speaker 00

  Yeah. I'll be back on tabs by then as well. I'll probably smoke again, so fuck it. Cause I'll be like, whatever.

• 25:08Speaker 01

  And then people will think you're a great grandma. Isn't that funny? That'll be nice.

• 25:11Speaker 00

  What?

• 25:11Speaker 01

  And you start smoking and get even more haggard, you'll be holding your grandchild and someone goes, that's your great grandchild. And you'll go.

• 25:19Speaker 00

  I'll drop kick a bitch by then. I'm not, no, no. But no, so that's mint. So your awkwardness and kind of like not being very social is gonna,

• 25:28Speaker 01

  It's gonna, it's gonna, it's gonna come back in the future and I'm buzzing about that. Bloody dance floor, full of HRT, absolutely waving your tits off, sweating, sweating like a nineties fucking hacienda.

• 25:40Speaker 00

  I've decided that when things do get really bad, I'm gonna take testosterone because my, and my sex drive will be through the fucking roof. You're not gonna be able to keep up.

• 25:46Speaker 01

  Uh, I'll be a meery night with a burns, you can go fuck off. You better go and bluff yourself in the toilet, love.

• 25:52Speaker 01

  It works for so many.

• 25:53Speaker 00

  It's beautiful. It's beautiful. Beautiful.

• 25:56Speaker 01

  Fantastic word.

• 25:59Speaker 01

  Just one more thing, two more things. Me, Shaun, my mate said the best thing I've ever heard anyone say in his best man's speech. I think he was a bit nervous and he accidentally said, the groomsmen all look lush, which I fucking, I nearly died. I literally, I heckled him, I went, bit weird.

• 26:19Speaker 01

  Thanks, thanks all the groomsmen and groomsmen, you all look lush.

• 26:26Speaker 01

  Fucking, oh God, I just.

• 26:29Speaker 00

  No, because you, well, actually, sorry to bring it back to me nana, me nana thing, but you had his life all day from when he said it. But then when he found out that someone thought we were grandparents, he was like, I was like, this is brilliant, this is like, this, this beats the looking lush, the groomsmen look lush.

• 26:42Speaker 01

  Doesn't, because you did the look lush thing, I'm the victim of this, the look lush, it's still much funnier than this.

• 26:46Speaker 00

  What's your other thing?

• 26:47Speaker 01

  My other thing is, I, because of me catastrophying, I ruined the night before, didn't I? Because we.

• 26:54Speaker 00

  Oh my God.

• 26:55Speaker 01

  Guys.

• 26:56Speaker 00

  I didn't think you were gonna bring this.

• 26:58Speaker 01

  I'm gonna bring this up because I've still got an issue with it. I've still got a problem, right? So we're in this pla, it was a lovely place. Should we say what it's called?

• 27:06Speaker 00

  Hidden River, Hidden River Barn.

• 27:08Speaker 01

  Hidden River Barn or something?

• 27:09Speaker 00

  Something like that, yeah.

• 27:10Speaker 01

  Near, near Carlisle.

• 27:11Speaker 00

  It was a gorgeous wedding. And can I just say, I don't know, Anna, Shaun who married Anna, I've never seen a more beautiful bride. She looked absolutely stunning, like genuinely took me breath away a bit. I was like, she looked like a, like a Disney princess.

• 27:28Speaker 01

  Yeah. She like, well, I said, I said she looked like a Marvel, like a Marvel hero. Do you know what I mean? Like literally came in, just like fucking just, yeah, she looked phenomenal. So it was this, this, this beautiful place. And what, it was a two day wedding, so we all stayed in cottages around, which I've never done before. It was really nice. So we're all in these cottages in this courtyard and we're in, we're ashamed with Jordan Shannon, they've got a two week old. And we're talking to one of the guys.

• 27:51Speaker 00

  Which we very much used to our advantage of just sort of like, we left at half nine, quarter to ten, we've got to get the baby home.

• 27:58Speaker 01

  Baby was quite happy to stay.

• 27:59Speaker 00

  The baby was fine.

• 27:59Speaker 01

  Had his ear defenders on, he was absolutely buzzing. I was like, yeah, we've got to go for the baby. Um, and for me, because I need to go rub me corns because I'm a grander. Um, so we're all in these cottages sleeping around and there's, there's a, um, there's a courtyard and everything and they're all around there. And we're talking to this guy on the night beforehand and he's just chatting to her and he said, lovely lad, but he said, me maid picked us up. And I opened the boot to put me case in and I couldn't fit me case in the boot because he'd brought his decks. I went, whoa, whoa, whoa. He's fucking what now? He went, oh, he's, he's brought his decks for tonight.

• 28:38Speaker 01

  I went, he's, I went DJ equipment. He's brought his own from home DJ equipment.

• 28:46Speaker 00

  To the Hidden River Barn courtyard.

• 28:49Speaker 01

  To the courtyard of cottages that we're all sleeping. This fucking dick has brought industrial grade.

• 28:57Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 28:58Speaker 01

  Musical equipment.

• 28:59Speaker 00

  Yeah. Took up the full boot.

• 29:01Speaker 01

  That fucking a boot of DJ equipment.

• 29:06Speaker 00

  What time, tell them what time you found this out.

• 29:08Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 29:08Speaker 00

  It was about.

• 29:09Speaker 01

  Half nine, 10 o'clock. No, was it? Oh, no, no, sorry. That's what time I went back. Yeah. It was about six o'clock and he found that out.

• 29:14Speaker 00

  So it, Chris, very much.

• 29:16Speaker 01

  Whole night ruined.

• 29:17Speaker 00

  The whole night. He was like, well, if there's decks, I'm not, I'm not sleeping.

• 29:21Speaker 01

  I was like, I'm gonna, the fucking walls are gonna be shaking. I was like, I'm gonna have to Google how much decks are because I'm gonna go outside and smash his decks in front of them.

• 29:27Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 29:27Speaker 01

  I'm gonna literally smash them up and go, do, do, how dare you?

• 29:30Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 29:31Speaker 01

  I couldn't hear them. I take it back.

• 29:32Speaker 00

  Yeah. You opened the window upstairs, you could sort of hear them, but they actually put them in the other house. I wonder how, did word get around that nobody actually wanted the decks or?

• 29:40Speaker 01

  I, I wasn't very quiet about it, I'll be honest with you.

• 29:43Speaker 00

  But can I also make another thing as well? Um, or did they all just also get to the, so I think everyone got really excited, but everyone is actually in their 40s.

• 29:52Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 29:52Speaker 00

  And do you think it got to the time that all went, oh, fuck me, I can't be honest?

• 29:55Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 29:56Speaker 00

  I think that's why, I think they'll, I think they'll all drop their arse.

• 29:58Speaker 01

  Again, is it because I'm old and boring now? But, and I don't want to offend people, but no, I do actually. Because if you're the person who says, I've brought me decks or I've brought me guitar, I'm all right for going anywhere with you. And I'm gonna go one further here and I am gonna upset people here. If you own decks and you want a paid DJ in any part of your life, I've got no respect for you.

• 30:18Speaker 00

  Yeah. Never been my cup of tea. I've never.

• 30:22Speaker 01

  You've got iPhone, you've got Spotify. What, what, what are you doing? What are you doing standing up there looking like a fucking Tepan Yaki chef?

• 30:27Speaker 00

  No, I never got a wide on over a deck. I've seen them in people's rooms when I was younger and I just thought, what the fuck is this?

• 30:33Speaker 01

  I just think it just, it stinks of links. I think it stinks of links. I think.

• 30:37Speaker 00

  Not my cut.

• 30:37Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 30:38Speaker 00

  But, well, what I said, I was like, I wouldn't mind, but it'll be that, just horrible music.

• 30:44Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 30:44Speaker 00

  If it was like Shaka Khan, I said, didn't I? I was like, if it was Shaka Khan.

• 30:46Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah. I don't think that thing, I don't think you need decks to do, yeah. I don't think you need to mix them together really. Just again, I've brought me decks. Go on, fucking get in the, get in the seat.

• 30:57Speaker 00

  We were on the deck vibe over.

• 30:58Speaker 01

  No, not at all. Although then again, the professional, Glenn Roughhead, shout out again to him, once he'd finished his music with his guitar, he set some decks up and he played some sort of background music.

• 31:08Speaker 00

  Musac.

• 31:09Speaker 01

  Fucking fantastic, honestly. Unbelievable. So yeah, I'm a huge hypocrite. I contradict myself left, right and centre, but I just think recreational decks.

• 31:17Speaker 00

  In the courtyard.

• 31:18Speaker 01

  In the courtyard of the cottages.

• 31:19Speaker 00

  We, we had, we had the grand Ben.

• 31:21Speaker 01

  I have the grand, exactly. We had the grandkids with one man. We had the daughter, a shithead partner who got knocked up and then fucking disappeared and the grand. Oh God, I mean.

• 31:32Speaker 00

  No, we're just old as fuck, Chris. That's all it is.

• 31:34Speaker 01

  Yes, I know.

• 31:36Speaker 00

  Babadu babadu babadu ba.

• 31:38Speaker 01

  It's time for what's your beef?

• 31:40Speaker 00

  What is your beef? I don't have one.

• 31:42Speaker 01

  I'm gonna be honest with you. I don't have a beef either this week. Um, and it's because, uh, can you remember yesterday? So again, sorry to go bang on about this wedding, but we normally, whenever we go away together, we've either got the kids with work or it's work.

• 31:57Speaker 00

  Yes.

• 31:58Speaker 01

  We go down to London, we do, please keep me anonymous. Every Wednesday it comes out on your podcast apps and on YouTube.

• 32:03Speaker 00

  It's back soon because we've had a bit of a time.

• 32:05Speaker 01

  Yes, it's back. We've had a little time off. It's back very, very soon. And it's always a work trip. We never do anything just us. It's stressful. It's work. Uh, and we never do anything just us. And even though at first we were like, fucking two day wedding. Wow. Like what, what is that? It was so nice. We'd kind of reconnected. And yesterday I said to you at one point, I went, are you all right? Cause like, I'm saying funny things to people and you're joining in with the laughing. At one point I said so and you were like, you threw your head back and you like laughed your head off at us. And I was like, she hasn't laughed at me like that.

• 32:41Speaker 00

  I laugh at you every week on here.

• 32:42Speaker 01

  It's work though, isn't it? It's work. You could be faking this.

• 32:45Speaker 00

  Funny?

• 32:45Speaker 01

  No, but when we're in social situations, a lot of people.

• 32:47Speaker 00

  Oh, you're horrible in so, I can't bear you.

• 32:49Speaker 01

  Yeah, there it is.

• 32:50Speaker 00

  Normally.

• 32:50Speaker 01

  Normally, but we, we just, something happened and I was like, yeah, my God. I was like, well, like we've had, this is like a little, we've had a little weekend away.

• 32:59Speaker 00

  You're doing a reset.

• 32:59Speaker 01

  Yeah. I also think Jordan and Shannon are a very calm and presence and I think they're really calm, the calm were down.

• 33:04Speaker 00

  What the fuck? I was embarrassed actually.

• 33:06Speaker 01

  They're two week old. He just, he wakes up, wakes up once in the night and then he's no bother. Goes straight back to sleep.

• 33:11Speaker 00

  There wasn't a cross word. I didn't hear, not even like words he told me.

• 33:14Speaker 01

  Yeah. Get the fuck, you put that stuff in the fun.

• 33:16Speaker 00

  Why not? Like that.

• 33:17Speaker 01

  Don't talk to us like that. None of that. They didn't do any of that. They're the perfect couple.

• 33:21Speaker 00

  God. We need to be nicer to each other.

• 33:23Speaker 01

  Well, let's hold hands. We, I feel like we connected again. You laughed at me, uh, uh, which obviously is the main thing I want in life from a relationship anyway.

• 33:33Speaker 01

  We had just, we just had a really nice time. At one point I thought, am I getting put down tomorrow? Am I dying? Is, is she about to drop some terrible news on me?

• 33:42Speaker 00

  No.

• 33:42Speaker 01

  Um, brilliant. So we had a lovely time.

• 33:44Speaker 00

  Sometimes we just.

• 33:45Speaker 01

  Let's be friends again.

• 33:46Speaker 00

  Sometimes we need to just not be stressed to bits, like.

• 33:49Speaker 01

  Working or having kids.

• 33:50Speaker 00

  Work.

• 33:50Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 33:51Speaker 00

  And then, and the kids are, they're super stressful then, but that, this six weeks has actually been quite nice.

• 33:56Speaker 01

  This holidays have been.

• 33:57Speaker 00

  It has. Like honestly, I know I've moaned about it.

• 33:59Speaker 01

  Oh my God, as you're listening to this, they all should be back at school. Yes.

• 34:05Speaker 01

  Come on.

• 34:08Speaker 01

  Our children, our children have to learn to read again, but you know, that's very much the teacher's problems.

• 34:14Speaker 00

  Yeah. Very happy about that. It's been, no, but it's, but genuinely it has been quite nice. I've loved the lazy mornings.

• 34:21Speaker 01

  Dare I say, obviously we've had, again, apologies to London, but we, we've had really nice weather.

• 34:26Speaker 00

  Yeah, they were.

• 34:27Speaker 01

  Bearable, really bearable weather. It's been lush.

• 34:29Speaker 00

  Just makes it a lot easier.

• 34:30Speaker 01

  So yeah, so no beef. Um, hey, shake my hand. Nice to be friends again. I don't know how long it'll last, but it's nice to be friends again.

• 34:36Speaker 00

  14 year.

• 34:37Speaker 01

  There it is.

• 34:37Speaker 00

  13 year.

• 34:38Speaker 01

  Oh, who cares? Um, and well done. We've got through the summer holidays. Well done.

• 34:42Speaker 00

  Well done. Well done to you. Well done.

• 34:44Speaker 01

  Well done to you.

• 34:45Speaker 00

  Well done.

• 34:45Speaker 01

  Well done to you.

• 34:45Speaker 00

  Well done.

• 34:46Speaker 01

  Well done to you.

• 34:47Speaker 00

  Well done to you.

• 34:48Speaker 01

  Get off me hand. Get off, get off me hand. Stop it.

• 34:50Speaker 00

  Babadu babadu babadu ba.

• 34:53Speaker 03

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• 35:23Speaker 04

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• 35:44Speaker 04

  You do got this. Nyquil intense flu, the nighttime sniffling, aching, aching fever, best sleep with a flu medicine. Uses directed, keep out of reach of children.

• 35:54Speaker 01

  It's time for questions from the public.

• 36:00Speaker 01

  Public. As always, if you'd like to get in touch, it's shagged, mired, annoyed at gmail.com. That's if you'd like to send a long form, long-winded, maybe in-depth, maybe narrative-driven email.

• 36:12Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 36:12Speaker 01

  Uh, and if you'd like to send a voice note, it is zero seven eight seven four four zero six six five zero. We love the voice notes. Please keep them coming in. We love all of your interactions and again, just, just thank you so much. You really make it what it is.

• 36:25Speaker 00

  Hi Chris and Rosie. We're just watching some clips on Rosie's Instagram where my partner comes in and asks, what's that you're watching? Is that that shagged, fucked and hungry?

• 36:39Speaker 00

  Honestly, I think it's time for a rebrand.

• 36:41Speaker 01

  Shagged, shagged, fucked and hungry.

• 36:44Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 36:45Speaker 01

  Shagged, fucked and hungry.

• 36:47Speaker 00

  Maybe we should have a, a rebrand.

• 36:49Speaker 01

  Well, no, no. Well, when we do a spin off cookery show, it's called shagged, fucked and hungry.

• 36:55Speaker 00

  Okay. Perfect.

• 36:56Speaker 01

  What are you doing? What are you typing down?

• 36:57Speaker 00

  I'm getting the.

• 36:58Speaker 01

  Are you getting the voice note?

• 36:59Speaker 00

  I'm getting the voice notes. Right.

• 37:00Speaker 01

  I forgot to tell you the idea. A guy walked past us, Bald Nazda, shout out to my man in Bald Nazda who I saw, literally, I was, I was in a hurry. I was going in to get something. I can't remember where it was. And, um, I walked past him and he just looked at us and I was like, oh, he couldn't say hello or I'm a fan or whatever like that. And he just leant in dead close and went babadu babadu ba. And I just went, thanks.

• 37:19Speaker 00

  That's nice. That's nice.

• 37:20Speaker 01

  Just went away. I was like, my man.

• 37:22Speaker 00

  That's creepy, but nice.

• 37:23Speaker 01

  It's the best one. It's the best one I've ever had. Just babadu babadu ba. I was like, thanks mate. Just great.

• 37:27Speaker 00

  Nice.

• 37:28Speaker 05

  Hi Chris and Rosie. Um, long time listener and I've been enjoying your icks for years. And now that I'm back in the dating pool at 36, um, I have one for you. So I went on this date with a, a nice lad. Um, like super gentlemanly. We were, we've been having a lot of banter, really like a really good crack, really, really enjoying it. Um, chatting to him and getting to know him, been through very similar life experiences. And the whole time that I'm sitting opposite him in this restaurant, I'm just thinking, there's something familiar about you and I can't quite put my finger on it.

• 38:08Speaker 05

  Um, anyway, we've gone through the meal. Um, he's paid for the meal and I'm super impressed. Um, because it doesn't happen very often at all. He then decides to lead the way. And we're thinking if we're gonna do something after or if I'm gonna just, we're gonna just see each other another time. And as we are leaving the restaurant and I'm standing behind him and we're walking out, I've recognised who he reminds me of. Um, his posture, the way he's walking, everything about him physically reminded me of Gru from the Minions. And I couldn't unsee it. And yeah, um, ick needless to say.

• 38:55Speaker 00

  Haven't seen him again since. And I feel so terrible about it because he's lovely. He's genuinely a lovely guy, but all I can now see is Gru. No, no, that is not good.

• 39:10Speaker 01

  That's one of them situations where you could have paused it. I would have guessed teachers, exes, dad, brother, uncle.

• 39:19Speaker 00

  I thought you'd, I thought you'd shagged him before. I forgot the whole.

• 39:22Speaker 01

  Well, you, you obviously went straight there. You're dirty, you've shagged him before.

• 39:23Speaker 00

  I just went there. I was like, you were texting this man before.

• 39:26Speaker 01

  Well done for giving that no respect whatsoever. I went through, and I'm sure everyone listening, I went through all of the possible, I, you could have given me a thousand guesses and I would never have come up with Gru.

• 39:37Speaker 00

  Agreed.

• 39:38Speaker 01

  That's so amazing.

• 39:38Speaker 00

  What's Gru's, what's he say again?

• 39:41Speaker 01

  What do you mean?

• 39:41Speaker 00

  Like, what's one of his sayings?

• 39:42Speaker 01

  I don't know. Minions have got sayings. He just says different stuff, doesn't he? Oh.

• 39:47Speaker 00

  Funny.

• 39:48Speaker 01

  Wow. Yeah, there's nothing, no. Oh, the, but that's the thing, the winner. Everything else was perfect.

• 39:56Speaker 00

  You can't unsee Gru.

• 39:57Speaker 01

  Ah, nah.

• 39:58Speaker 00

  You can't unsee that. I mean, what, did he have a little, like, cravat on or something? What the fuck? Has he got pin legs?

• 40:04Speaker 01

  I think he had 14 tiny little yellow dudes with him. I think that was the problem. That was the problem.

• 40:09Speaker 00

  I quite like Gru. Listen, because we're slaggers off so much, men in general, I've got a really, really nice reverse ick here.

• 40:18Speaker 01

  Get in.

• 40:18Speaker 00

  Somebody talking really nicely about her husband. I think it's, it's a lovely thing. Okay?

• 40:23Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 40:23Speaker 00

  Um, hi Chris and Rosie, please keep me anonymous because obviously she's embarrassed.

• 40:28Speaker 01

  That's just saying something nice about her husband. Fucking hell, man.

• 40:31Speaker 00

  Um, Rosie, this one's for you. All right. My partner was the Mighty Ducks kid. Like, he wasn't actually in Mighty Ducks. He just loved, like, yeah. Charlie Conway, eat your heart out. Like, street hockey till the lights came on, roller hockey in the nineties, then semi-pro ice hockey, actual hockey hair, the whole thing, okay? Then Covid hit, life got serious, family bills, mortgages, you know, now he only plays for fun. But he has the reverse ick. The thing that absolutely ends me, and I think in like a sexual way, like not in a bad way. Watching him and our boys, 11 and nine, playing street hockey like it's a movie montage, Coach Bombay would be weeping. And now the boys can finally skate on their own, so they do drills, like pot robbers drills.

• 41:14Speaker 00

  They practise, he coaches them. And my favourite, favourite part? When he skates backwards.

• 41:21Speaker 00

  On ice, on roller skates, I don't care. Watching a grown man skate backwards whilst yelling, keep your sticks on the ground, at two tiny humans, which she has made as well, is inexplicably the most erotic thing I have ever witnessed. It's powerful, it's graceful, it's athletic, it's a bit weirdly dominant. It's the reason we now have an eight month old. That's not a joke, that's cause and effect.

• 41:44Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 41:46Speaker 00

  And it says here, Chris, watch the Mighty Ducks and do it for your marriage. No, we're, no. I'm gonna stop you there.

• 41:53Speaker 00

  Because Chris gets very obsessed with things and Chris will come home within the full gear and not have a clue what he's doing and he will have to learn that you like your husband.

• 42:03Speaker 01

  No, no. I can feel, you know, similar to golf here.

• 42:06Speaker 00

  No, it's not happening.

• 42:07Speaker 01

  No, I can feel a new obsession coming on, Rosie. Rosie, I'm gonna say it, Rosie. It's knuckle puck time.

• 42:13Speaker 00

  Is that what they say?

• 42:14Speaker 01

  I know that, I know that, yeah. My friends used to say that. I know, I've never seen it, but I know the catchphrase.

• 42:18Speaker 00

  Just don't, no, you like your husband, listener, because he's been doing it for a long time and he's actually really good at it. Don't be getting Chris in this.

• 42:25Speaker 01

  Guys, we'll be at A and E with me because I turned my ankle on my new skates. Um, that is the.

• 42:30Speaker 00

  It's nice though, isn't it?

• 42:31Speaker 01

  That is for me, that's the perfect reverse ick. That's what I meant by reverse icks. Because that in another world, on, through someone else's eyes, I thought this guy was really fit and then he skated backwards and he was shouting at his kids and it was an ick. That is such a perfect, perfect, because you know, because I took his top off and he had a six pack, reverse it. It's not a reverse ick, that's just a genuine attraction of. That's, and I, hey, skating backwards is very embarrassing.

• 42:54Speaker 00

  And also, is British, um, like back in the nineties, we, American sort of things were very. How am I saying this? Like, I found American lads like lush.

• 43:07Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah. Well, Americanised in the nineties too. Yeah, well, that was when it all, that's when fucking Halloween started getting big, you know, like be, you know, kids are buying baseball bats instead of cricket bats and obviously there was the hockey and ice hockey and all that stuff, yeah.

• 43:18Speaker 00

  It's not big really here, really, is it?

• 43:19Speaker 01

  No, but that's.

• 43:20Speaker 00

  Yeah, so yeah, of course he's lush. Babadu, babadu, babadu, ba. Hi Rosie and Chris. I was just listening to your recent podcast where you mentioned you often quote, we're both doctors.

• 43:29Speaker 01

  We're both doctors. Well, we're both doctors. Get out of our way.

• 43:33Speaker 00

  I actually think this could be, I don't know if I'm actually like, not lazy enough. I can't speak today, like Jesus Christ. And this could be a nice.

• 43:42Speaker 01

  You've had four nights on the piss, you're right.

• 43:43Speaker 00

  This could be a nice new section.

• 43:45Speaker 01

  Right.

• 43:46Speaker 00

  Of what do other people have sayings about people that they don't, that they don't know?

• 43:50Speaker 01

  It's a catchy title, I'll give you that.

• 43:57Speaker 00

  Clip that up.

• 44:01Speaker 01

  We've got a new section. It's what do other people have sayings about other people that they don't know?

• 44:08Speaker 00

  Babadu, babadu, ba, da, da. What do other people have other sections about sayings about what they don't know?

• 44:13Speaker 01

  I'm gonna double down. I'm gonna double down. I'm gonna call it, this, that's the name of the section.

• 44:18Speaker 00

  What was I calling what I said?

• 44:20Speaker 01

  We'll, we'll listen it back to it, we'll get it. The name for this section is, what do other people have sayings about people that they don't know?

• 44:26Speaker 00

  Yeah, okay.

• 44:27Speaker 01

  That's the name for the section. I'm doubling down on it.

• 44:31Speaker 00

  I love it. I love it already. Right. It made me think.

• 44:35Speaker 00

  Listen, stop, I can't concentrate. It made me think about all the things me and my husband quote to each other because we do, we've got loads over the years. There are so many things we quote, but there's one that's been going for about 14 years now.

• 44:48Speaker 01

  Nice.

• 44:49Speaker 00

  Basically, a friend of ours had got back together with her ex-partner. She was so excited to tell us how great things had been going and how perfect they are for each other. She was listing us things, she was listing things to us about them. Um, that she saw as signs they were both destined to be together forever. One thing she listed was, we both like vegetables.

• 45:16Speaker 01

  God, grasping at straws much. We both breathe, uh, we both use a toilet. You heard of that? We both do the toilet, um.

• 45:24Speaker 00

  Both sleep in, in a bed?

• 45:26Speaker 01

  Uh, we both, I don't know if you've ever seen this, but while talking, while looking at stuff, our eyelids, our, our eyes get dry and our eyelids close.

• 45:33Speaker 00

  Not blinking, you both blink.

• 45:34Speaker 01

  Yeah, the, yeah, the eyelids close over the eye, eyeball to moisturise it. We both do that.

• 45:39Speaker 00

  Stop, God.

• 45:40Speaker 01

  So mate.

• 45:41Speaker 00

  No, that is good. That is good.

• 45:43Speaker 01

  We both like vegetables.

• 45:44Speaker 00

  So she wasn't referring to anything kinky when she said this, just basically telling us that she can cook him a proper meal, like a roast, and he'll happily eat his veggies. Um, and he's not one of those men who just wants a plate of meat all the time.

• 45:55Speaker 01

  Right.

• 45:55Speaker 00

  But this line stuck for years.

• 45:57Speaker 01

  We both like our vegetables.

• 45:59Speaker 00

  And when me and my husband talk about how good we are for each other, we often joke that we both like vegetables.

• 46:03Speaker 01

  Fantastic.

• 46:04Speaker 00

  So we're perfect, we're clearly the perfect match. Um, the couple are not together, the vegetable, the vegetable couple are not together anymore.

• 46:11Speaker 01

  Never in the world. Yes, I can imagine they're not because she had to put, we both like vegetables in the list that I imagine took her fucking hours to put together.

• 46:20Speaker 00

  It's just lovely. I just thought that was quite funny.

• 46:22Speaker 01

  So yeah, so what, what sayings do you have about other people that people don't know about?

• 46:27Speaker 00

  That they don't know.

• 46:28Speaker 01

  Send them in.

• 46:30Speaker 00

  I think that could be really, we'll, we'll need a better title, but I think that could be really interesting section.

• 46:34Speaker 01

  That could be, all of those, all of those words are pulling their own weight individually in that sense.

• 46:37Speaker 00

  Off the top of your head, is there anything else?

• 46:39Speaker 01

  That we do.

• 46:40Speaker 00

  That we've got.

• 46:40Speaker 01

  Obviously quoting films and stuff isn't the thing.

• 46:42Speaker 00

  No, it's not films. It's what someone said.

• 46:45Speaker 01

  It's something someone else has said to you that you found hilarious, that you've, that you've, that's become part of your vernacular, that you quote to each other as a reference to something.

• 46:54Speaker 00

  Well, I did it for years, but there's a perfect, I did it for years about that lass I worked with.

• 46:57Speaker 01

  Which one?

• 46:58Speaker 00

  About the dog.

• 46:58Speaker 01

  Oh, that dog's hot as out.

• 46:59Speaker 00

  When the dog, the dog was just really hot and needed a drink, so its tongue was out and she was like, that dog is hot as out.

• 47:06Speaker 00

  Oh, I've got another one. My friend Philippa, when we were away a few years ago, she was drunk and she fell off her chair backwards. And while she was falling, she went, oh, I'm aware.

• 47:19Speaker 00

  Well, obviously. Oh, oh, I'm aware.

• 47:21Speaker 01

  Obviously my new one is, um, the groomers would look lush. That's not going anywhere. That's not going anywhere, anytime soon.

• 47:28Speaker 00

  Oh, wait a minute, there is loads. There's loads. We live, that is actually, I think that's our love language.

• 47:34Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 47:34Speaker 00

  Just for a while, for a good six months quoting the same, I mean, we still do, we're both doctors. That's, that's never going anywhere.

• 47:41Speaker 01

  Next time, when we do them over the next week or so, just note it down.

• 47:44Speaker 00

  We'll have a think of some, okay.

• 47:45Speaker 01

  Back to next week's section of what sayings do you have about other people that people don't know about?

• 47:55Speaker 00

  Why are you still listening to this? I'm honestly, I'm judging you more than us. We get, this is our job, we get paid. Why are you, what are you doing? Fucking hell. I'm so, no, I don't mean, I'm sorry, I love you so much, don't go anywhere.

• 48:08Speaker 01

  Sorry guys, she's a, she's a grandmother, she sometimes says things she doesn't mean.

• 48:14Speaker 00

  Dear Rosie and Chris, please keep me anonymous, my wife listens. Quick one from me, my wife and I came to see Chris's show in York back in March. I'm only saying this because you've still got some tickets to shift and this might help.

• 48:26Speaker 01

  Okay, cool. There is not many left for York, I'll be honest with you, but I do do need-

• 48:30Speaker 00

  No, no, but I mean, all that parts of the country.

• 48:31Speaker 01

  All of the country, I'm going all over the place, guys.

• 48:33Speaker 00

  We're both big fans and I think my wife might have an innocent crush on Chris.

• 48:37Speaker 01

  Nothing innocent about it.

• 48:39Speaker 00

  Weird, innocent, you can't get a break. Innocent crush?

• 48:43Speaker 01

  Not just a crush, I'm either a weird crush, a guilty crush.

• 48:46Speaker 00

  What does innocent crush mean?

• 48:49Speaker 01

  No, I think she just wants a cuddle.

• 48:50Speaker 00

  Oh.

• 48:51Speaker 01

  It's just like, oh, he's nice, maybe. I'll take that, I'll take that.

• 48:54Speaker 00

  That's cute, I'll take that. She can, yeah, you can have a cuddle of him, you can't do anything else with him.

• 48:58Speaker 01

  Listen.

• 48:59Speaker 00

  Knock you out.

• 49:00Speaker 01

  Quick bluff? Quick bluff in the dressing room toilets? What?

• 49:05Speaker 00

  You can't do that, because a comedian did that and he got in a lot of trouble, rightly so.

• 49:08Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, I'm not-

• 49:10Speaker 00

  Don't be shagging at the toilets.

• 49:11Speaker 01

  I'm not gonna do that.

• 49:12Speaker 00

  Listen. We made a date night of it, dinner show in a hotel in York, child free. I want to thank Chris sincerely, as after his show, we had the most mind blowing sex ever.

• 49:25Speaker 01

  I remember, I was there, I was, I was filming it in the corner. We'll show the clip now.

• 49:30Speaker 00

  Imagine. We've been married 12 years and sex has always been good, but this night was one to remember. My sincerest gratitude to Chris, cheers brother. What the, what the hell do you see in this show?

• 49:43Speaker 01

  Me, well, yeah, I mean, I don't, I wish I knew.

• 49:47Speaker 00

  Really, innit?

• 49:48Speaker 01

  I wish I knew. Wow, so that, they had a good laugh with me and then they went in bed and knocked each other's socks off. Well, you know what, I'm glad I could help.

• 49:56Speaker 00

  Do you, oh, hang on a minute.

• 49:58Speaker 01

  I don't know how I helped, what?

• 49:59Speaker 00

  Oh god, this is not good.

• 50:01Speaker 01

  What?

• 50:01Speaker 00

  Do you think they watched your show and you talked about our life and like our marriage and do you think they were like, oh my god?

• 50:08Speaker 01

  Our life's much better.

• 50:12Speaker 00

  Oh no, we've been used, we've been used as that our life's much better than theirs.

• 50:15Speaker 01

  That might be it, you know.

• 50:17Speaker 00

  It's happened.

• 50:18Speaker 01

  I'd rather that than think that she then went back and thought about me while having sex with him. I don't, I don't like that, I don't like that.

• 50:24Speaker 00

  No, he said innocent, she wasn't, she might have been thinking about you. Oh my god, that's quite cool.

• 50:28Speaker 01

  So I, so have I had, have I had a threesome, is that my threesome?

• 50:34Speaker 00

  The saddest threesome ever, that's the saddest threesome ever. Someone was just slightly thinking about you, that's horrible.

• 50:42Speaker 01

  I'll take it, I'll take it.

• 50:44Speaker 00

  Where was I, we come as a team, where was I in your thoughts and your mind, eh? Eh?

• 50:48Speaker 01

  Listen.

• 50:49Speaker 00

  Me and my granny did.

• 50:50Speaker 01

  Grandma's got, I'm getting involved in that. No, you know what, it's grandmas you can, I'm not being, I'm not being interested. If you want to have a threesome and you're a grandma, you bloody go for it.

• 50:57Speaker 00

  It would better, it's coming back to us.

• 50:59Speaker 01

  I'm not, I've told, I've told you my-

• 51:00Speaker 00

  No, I don't want a threesome, I'm just saying when we're older, I want to get better at sex.

• 51:04Speaker 01

  I'm not disappointing two women at the same time, you think this is?

• 51:07Speaker 00

  True.

• 51:10Speaker 00

  Hello, this is a random one, all right, and it's a bit self indulgent, well, kind of.

• 51:14Speaker 01

  So, so.

• 51:15Speaker 00

  This isn't exactly the usual gossip you guys share on the podcast, but I've been a listener from the early days of the pod and have listened to most episodes a few times.

• 51:22Speaker 01

  Oh bless you, thank you.

• 51:24Speaker 00

  So lovely. So I felt like I knew a lot about you guys, but every few months Rosie mentions another random job that she's never mentioned before. Um, most recent one being working in an autism unit and working in a nursing home, yes.

• 51:37Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 51:37Speaker 00

  Yeah, I did. So I guess my question is, how many jobs has Rosie actually had? It's been baffling me for a while now, as someone who has had three jobs, I'm coming up 30.

• 51:46Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 51:47Speaker 00

  So she's listed all the ones that she knows and I have added actually ones that she hasn't.

• 51:51Speaker 01

  This is amazing, okay.

• 51:53Speaker 00

  So these, and these are all genuine, is it weird that I had so many jobs? This is my longest job, by the way.

• 51:58Speaker 01

  This one is your longest job, congratulations, and your longest relationship.

• 52:01Speaker 00

  Oh god.

• 52:02Speaker 01

  Yes, congratulations.

• 52:04Speaker 00

  Life's young. So, these are the jobs that she got, or he actually, sorry, I don't know. Um, minchella, Dorothy Perkins, Pontons Blue Coat, the gadget shop, nursery nurse worker, teaching assistant, worked in an autism unit, I did. Inland Revenue, worked in Rhodes as a cabaret singer, that is true. Um, a cabaret band singer, radio host, nursing home, then podcaster, et cetera. Um, thank you and thank you for the podcast, bloody, bloody, blah. The ones that she hasn't mentioned are, Palmer Bar, which was a bar, bar work.

• 52:32Speaker 01

  In South Shields, yeah.

• 52:33Speaker 00

  The Body Shop, River Island, I was a receptionist at the photo copy, yeah, place, you know, when I had to ring everyone, what tone I wanted.

• 52:40Speaker 01

  Every time we'd drive past, you'd point at it, yeah, horrible.

• 52:42Speaker 00

  That's nice. I was a recruitment consultant for a little while, that's when I had to do the, they had to fit the shops in the office, yeah. Um, leaflets for a posh clothes shop in Sunderland, I was a presenter for music events in the North East. Uh, Christmas work involving pantomimes, Santas Norte, I was an elf, do you remember? A high school musical I did around the, around the social clubs and, and that, that's it really, that's all I could think of.

• 53:04Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 53:05Speaker 00

  Lot of jobs.

• 53:06Speaker 01

  Lot of jobs?

• 53:06Speaker 00

  And I actually don't think I've said them all.

• 53:07Speaker 01

  I had a lot of jobs.

• 53:08Speaker 00

  I don't think I've-

• 53:09Speaker 01

  So I had all sports, well, paper round?

• 53:11Speaker 00

  Oh, no, there, there weren't. Nobody was asking you.

• 53:16Speaker 01

  Other than one, no mine?

• 53:16Speaker 00

  Nobody was actually asking you.

• 53:18Speaker 01

  Well, some-

• 53:19Speaker 00

  You talk about yourself enough.

• 53:20Speaker 01

  Somebody, someone might email, email-

• 53:22Speaker 00

  They might, but what, you had like four, five?

• 53:24Speaker 01

  It's not even worth mentioning.

• 53:26Speaker 00

  It's not interesting. You, you can see the variation in mine.

• 53:29Speaker 01

  Yeah, okay.

• 53:30Speaker 00

  You can see at times when I got very desperate for money.

• 53:33Speaker 01

  Yeah. Is there, is there prostitution on there as well?

• 53:37Speaker 00

  Never actually done prostitution, but can I tell you right now, if I'd have been younger and OnlyFans was about, can't say I wouldn't have.

• 53:43Speaker 01

  Ah, you 100% would have had that.

• 53:44Speaker 00

  I probably would have, yeah.

• 53:45Speaker 01

  Whapping out your tits on OnlyFans, 100%.

• 53:47Speaker 00

  No, I wouldn't have done face stuff, would I just done body stuff? Yeah, fuck it, I would have.

• 53:53Speaker 01

  We all know you would have accidentally shown your face on the first one. The first one, you'd have bent down to pick something up and gone, ah!

• 54:05Speaker 01

  And, I've already uploaded it, I can't delete it, and that would, and that would be it, and you go, oh, I love it, so just go full on with it.

• 54:10Speaker 00

  Anyway, thank you, thank you for the, the person who got all me jobs, it was cute.

• 54:15Speaker 01

  I think it was a lady.

• 54:16Speaker 00

  Cute to go down memory lane.

• 54:17Speaker 01

  Yeah. All on your own, just on them, I try to join, it's-

• 54:21Speaker 00

  I mean, list your jobs, go on. All sports, inland revenue. We were both at the same time.

• 54:26Speaker 01

  All sports, Stadium Alight, inland revenue. Uh, went to the inland revenue end of

• 54:35Speaker 01

  sort of contract party and hiked up in a taxi on the way home and had to spend, give 60 quid to the taxi driver, so back to Stadium Alight for money. Um, and then the New Crown pub, and then, um, stand up.

• 54:49Speaker 00

  Brilliant.

• 54:50Speaker 01

  Uh, it was also, I also, the clothes shop USC. I also got accepted for a job for USC and turned up a month early and then came and then couldn't get it and had to go back to the stadium again. Stadium Alight was like my little, it was like my little, my little safety net, it just caught us every time I fucked up.

• 55:06Speaker 00

  That's nice. I forgot about the, um, I worked in the plus size, the women's plus size clothing shop, do you remember?

• 55:14Speaker 01

  No.

• 55:14Speaker 00

  I did, it was at the Metrol Centre, I think it was, I can't remember what it was called, it was opposite the leather shop. Is it still there? Leather bags, leather coat?

• 55:22Speaker 01

  Everything's leather, they do, they do big leather jackets.

• 55:25Speaker 00

  I think it's called Lander Leather.

• 55:26Speaker 01

  Lander Leather? Don't you, it's called Lander Leather.

• 55:29Speaker 00

  The land of the leathers. I don't think I've, never, I've never bought anything like that.

• 55:34Speaker 01

  There's a quote, we used to say land of leather quite a lot.

• 55:36Speaker 00

  From that, maybe it was, yeah.

• 55:38Speaker 01

  We did just say land of, yeah.

• 55:39Speaker 00

  The land of the leather. I don't think it's still there, I can't, I'm gonna have to have a look.

• 55:44Speaker 01

  It was like bags, hats, long leather coats.

• 55:47Speaker 00

  Just one bloke worked there?

• 55:48Speaker 01

  Yeah. Weird shop.

• 55:50Speaker 00

  Same bloke.

• 55:50Speaker 01

  I mean, fucking smelt incredible.

• 55:52Speaker 00

  Oh yeah, it was lush.

• 55:53Speaker 01

  But leather's gone the way of fur now though, leather's like bad, like leather's gone the way of fur, because it's cow, isn't it? It's gone the way of fur, it's like you're basically, it's, people don't wear it anymore.

• 56:02Speaker 00

  Fucking hell, hang on, is it, let's find out. Oh, end of an era at the Metrol Centre, as a famous shop shuts, Lander Leather, 7th of March 2026.

• 56:12Speaker 01

  This year it shuts?

• 56:13Speaker 00

  Yeah, can we have a minute, that was in the Chronicle.

• 56:15Speaker 01

  Chronicle! Applause for Lander Leather.

• 56:17Speaker 00

  How many, 36 years of trading, our full life.

• 56:21Speaker 01

  Yeah, plus four.

• 56:24Speaker 00

  A minute for Lander Leather.

• 56:25Speaker 01

  But again, it is quite, you know, it's gone the way of fur, it's like wearing, you know, yeah.

• 56:31Speaker 00

  Shutters are pulled down on the retail unit. With a note on them reading, we are now closed.

• 56:37Speaker 01

  The shutters were also made of leather, that was the weirdest bit, the weirdest bit for me, smelt incredible. Shut us down.

• 56:43Speaker 00

  I don't think it's moved anywhere else, I think it's just done after 36 years.

• 56:46Speaker 01

  Well, exactly, does it say why? It'll be because no one's buying leather anymore. Everything's for leather now.

• 56:52Speaker 00

  Always all right.

• 56:53Speaker 01

  Who?

• 56:54Speaker 00

  Mr Leather.

• 56:55Speaker 01

  Larry, Larry Leather, I'm sure he's all right, I hope so, I know what you mean, it is sad.

• 57:00Speaker 00

  It's gone back in the sun.

• 57:02Speaker 01

  What?

• 57:05Speaker 01

  Doesn't make any sense.

• 57:06Speaker 00

  Which is because he looks like leather.

• 57:07Speaker 01

  I wonder how much leather stuff he had left over, his house is all leather.

• 57:12Speaker 00

  They might have done it, why didn't they do a shutting down sale?

• 57:15Speaker 01

  Are you upset, are you now upset that you missed the shutting down sale for Lander Leather?

• 57:17Speaker 00

  Because, you know, I do this, you know, though, something shuts down and I go, oh my god, I never go.

• 57:23Speaker 01

  We all did it with Woolworths, we all did it with Woolworths. Woolworths shut down and we all went, oh no, I used to love going there when I was 10, right? Well, that's not a thing, what are you talking about?

• 57:32Speaker 00

  Do you know the pick and mixes were all just out of date chocolate? I had a boyfriend who worked there, he told us.

• 57:37Speaker 01

  Right, okay.

• 57:38Speaker 00

  It was all out of date tins, so you know, you're going and you got the pick and mix and you're thinking, oh, get in, all out of date.

• 57:44Speaker 01

  So they were just, they would just decant the out of date stuff into the pick and mix so everyone could just take it?

• 57:50Speaker 00

  Yes.

• 57:51Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 57:51Speaker 00

  I know, I was devastated.

• 57:52Speaker 01

  Well, of course, I was gonna say.

• 57:56Speaker 01

  I like, you know, the level of this devastation, it was, I, I, in fact, I can tell you exactly what the level of devastation was, this is a direct impression of it. Oh really?

• 58:05Speaker 00

  How out of date are we talking?

• 58:07Speaker 01

  Are they? Mmm, oh, that's just, they taste the same. Mmm, what a shit.

• 58:13Speaker 00

  They were fine. Do you remember what the pick and mix at Woolworths were?

• 58:16Speaker 01

  It's unbelievable, it was double, it was two, you could walk around it, it was like, it was an aisle of its own, double sided. Incredible.

• 58:22Speaker 00

  And they had the toy bit downstairs.

• 58:24Speaker 01

  Toy bit was unbelievable.

• 58:24Speaker 00

  I remember, I was obsessed and I can still remember it, this like dollhouse, I can smell it, man, oh god.

• 58:30Speaker 01

  It was made of leather?

• 58:32Speaker 00

  It wasn't leather.

• 58:37Speaker 00

  Thank you so, so much for listening to this week's episode of Shag Marry Lloyd. Next week, we're gonna come back, we're gonna be rested, we're gonna be looking great. I'm gonna have had, um, multiple plastic surgeries and we're gonna be on top, wanna be on top.

• 58:51Speaker 01

  Panicked bloody weight, gonna be unrecognisable, um, thank you so, so much for listening, we really do appreciate it. If you wanna get in touch, it's [email protected], send us an email. If you wanna send a voice note, 07874 406650. ChrisRamseyComedy.com to hoover up the last few tickets for my tour that starts next week, can't wait to get back out there. And, uh, we'll be back in years, next week, thank you very much.

• 59:13Speaker 00

  Bye.

• 59:14Speaker 01

  Bye.