How Relationships & Emotional Health Affect Your Lifespan w/ Dr. Mark Hyman EP 1396

https://lewishowes.com/mindset - Order a copy of my new book The Greatness Mindset today! Dr. Mark Hyman is a practicing family physician and an internationally recognized advocate in the field of Functional Medicine and a fourteen-time New York Times best-selling author. He is the host of one of the leading health podcasts, The Doctor’s Farmacy. Check out Dr. Hyman’s new book, ‘Young Forever: The Secrets to Living Your Longest, Healthiest LifeIn this episode you will learn, The 7 Core Biological Systems that underline disease. How your health is being affected by something as simple as a lightbulb. How to get your health-span to equal your lifespan. The impact a healthy love life has on your lifespan. For more, go to lewishowes.com/1396Listen to Mark’s prior episodes here! How Food Heals or Harms Your Body, Aging & Mental Health: https://link.chtbl.com/1075-podBuild Your Health to Build Your Wealth: https://link.chtbl.com/916-podUse Food to Heal Your Body: https://link.chtbl.com/714-pod Get more from Lewis! Get my New York Times Bestselling book, Make Money Easy! Get The Greatness Mindset audiobook on SpotifyText Lewis AIYouTubeInstagramWebsiteTiktokFacebookX

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:01Lewis Howes?

  Okay, so if you haven't heard the news yet, I've got a new book out called The Greatness Mindset. Unlock the Power of Your Mind and Live Your Best Life Today. It's coming out soon and I'm pumped to invite you to be a part of the launch team for this book. This is a rare opportunity to get your questions answered and network with other champions of greatness in this exclusive community of conscious achievers. If you're ready to receive early access to the first few chapters of the book, behind the scenes updates from me, plus VIP access to bonuses and giveaways, then this is for you. For instructions about how to join this greatness launch team, make sure to go to lewishouse.com/launchteam right now.

• 0:43Lewis Howes?

  Again, make sure to check it out at lewishouse.com/launchteam right now.

• 0:48Mark Hyman?

  I kept learning about this pattern. And until I really healed that, I wasn't able to just be ready for love.

• 0:55Lewis Howes?

  Wow.

• 0:56Mark Hyman?

  So you kind of have to not find the right person. You have to be the right person.

• 0:59Lewis Howes?

  Welcome to the School of Greatness. My name is Lewis Howes, a former pro athlete turned lifestyle entrepreneur. And each week, we bring you an inspiring person or message to help you discover how to unlock your inner greatness. Thanks for spending some time with me today. Now let the class begin.

• 1:23Lewis Howes?

  You know, relationships then sound like a massive part of longevity.

• 1:26Mark Hyman?

  Yeah, absolutely.

• 1:26Lewis Howes?

  And the person you choose to be with intimately, it sounds like it could play a big part in you living longer or also dying quickly if that person's not there. If you don't have the tools to recalibrate once that person is gone or if something happens to them, right?

• 1:43Mark Hyman?

  Yeah, but what happens is we're also part of a society where when your nuclear family, meaning your primary partner goes, you're not embedded in a network of people, right? So in Sardinia, in the Korea, yes, people died and spouses died. So Carmen's wife died, but he was living with his family and his kids and his brother and it was like he had a whole...

• 2:03Lewis Howes?

  Ecosystem, a community of people, tribe, where it's like, okay, one person's gone and it's really sad and you're grieving, but you've got grandkids, you've got kids, you've got parents, you've got uncles and aunts. Involving you in the community still, right? Creating a process of integration in life.

• 2:19Mark Hyman?

  Exactly.

• 2:19Lewis Howes?

  Meaning, purpose, community. So in America, what I'm hearing you say is we isolate ourselves more.

• 2:24Mark Hyman?

  Totally.

• 2:25Lewis Howes?

  Right? It's like, find your house in the suburbs and your parents go here and your kids go away.

• 2:30Mark Hyman?

  They look at their neighbors, you know, they looked out there. They've lived with somebody for 20 years, they don't even know who they are.

• 2:34Lewis Howes?

  Sure. What do you think we could do differently? And is it, do you think America and society will ever change? With this, you know, parents leaving and... Because I hear about some of the, I think it's a... In India, it's like they fight over who's gonna have their parents sometimes is what I hear. It's like, which siblings are gonna get to have the parents? Yeah, yeah, it's like this argument debate.

• 2:55Mark Hyman?

  And Japan is the same thing.

• 2:56Lewis Howes?

  Really?

• 2:56Mark Hyman?

  Yeah. Yeah, I mean, it's a hard society we live in. And it's such an individualistic society. It's not a communal society. And I think it's, it's cost us a lot. And I feel like there are little pockets of people who are building community. Whether it's online communities, whether it's in-person communities, whether it's, you know, communities that are, you know, in cities. And there's, so there is a sense of people starting to build community. And I, I'm involved in a lot of these and I'm starting to see it pop around. But I think it's, it's definitely not mainstream yet.

• 3:24Lewis Howes?

  Wow. I talked to one doctor on here. And he said he got sick two different times in his life. He's an older guy in his 70s and 80s. And I, and then he recovered from it. And I said, what happened? How did you recover? He said, I found love.

• 3:40Mark Hyman?

  Yeah.

• 3:41Lewis Howes?

  He's like, I found love and it gave me that sense of meaning, that belonging, that purpose again. It got me back in shape, it got me making better decisions, you know, it got me living life to the fullest.

• 3:50Mark Hyman?

  Totally.

• 3:51Lewis Howes?

  Why is love such a strong healer?

• 3:55Mark Hyman?

  Love is medicine. I mean, I, I think, you know, it's the same reason that community is, the same reason belonging is. It's because, you know, when, when we have a deep connection, relation with someone, it literally changes our gene expression. So if you're in a loving connection with someone.

• 4:10Lewis Howes?

  Really?

• 4:10Mark Hyman?

  Yes. It's this whole scientific field of socio-genomics, right? How our social relationships affect our genes.

• 4:19Mark Hyman?

  And we know if you're in a conflictual relationship, you will turn on genes of inflammation which cause disease and aging. If you are in a loving, connected, heart-centered relationship, you are activating all the repair genes. Literally through cuddling can change your epigenome. Right?

• 4:37Lewis Howes?

  It's amazing.

• 4:37Mark Hyman?

  So stay in bed for an extra five minutes and cuddle.

• 4:39Lewis Howes?

  I love cuddling. I got home last night and I just like laid there with Martha, just like hugging her for like 30 minutes. I was like, uh, just wanna relax. And it feels healing because your body relaxes.

• 4:49Mark Hyman?

  Yeah.

• 4:50Lewis Howes?

  It feels like whatever's going on, you can calm it down and just be peaceful.

• 4:55Mark Hyman?

  Totally.

• 4:55Lewis Howes?

  It's a beautiful thing. So you've been, you've been married a few times, right? Married and divorced a few times.

• 4:59Mark Hyman?

  Yeah, I'm an expert in relationships.

• 5:00Lewis Howes?

  Married and divorced three times. What would you say is the biggest lessons from marriage and divorce that have taught you about health and longevity?

• 5:10Mark Hyman?

  That's a great question. I think, you know, everybody is different. And for me, the key to really finding happiness and the key to finding love that is a really good, healthy, solid love, which I have now, was really dealing with my original traumas and wounds.

• 5:25Lewis Howes?

  Really?

• 5:26Mark Hyman?

  Yeah. And I think, you know, you wrote a book about toxic masculinity. And I think, you know, we all, whether we're men or women, throughout our childhood have big or small traumas. You know, Gabor Maté talks about micro-trauma, macro-trauma. You know, micro-trauma could just not being seen by your parents and not being loved well enough or neglected or not actual abuse. Whereas, you know, there's actual, real emotional or physical abuse or sexual abuse. So all that registers in our nervous system. And for me, I had corrupted love software and I had to heal that.

• 5:59Lewis Howes?

  A corrupted love software?

• 6:01Mark Hyman?

  Yeah.

• 6:02Lewis Howes?

  What did that, what did that mean for you?

• 6:03Mark Hyman?

  Well, you know, I'll tell you the brief story. You know, my mother was a child of deaf parents.

• 6:10Lewis Howes?

  Deaf?

• 6:10Mark Hyman?

  Deaf. They couldn't hear. So she was their ears and their eyes.

• 6:14Lewis Howes?

  Wow, that's a lot of responsibility.

• 6:15Mark Hyman?

  So she became a parent to them.

• 6:17Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 6:18Mark Hyman?

  She became somebody who thought that love was taking care of people who needed help or were broken.

• 6:23Lewis Howes?

  Wow, that's interesting.

• 6:24Mark Hyman?

  Right, so she picked my dad and my stepfather who were very broken. And they were in very, you know, damaged emotionally, and that was because, you know.

• 6:35Lewis Howes?

  That's what she knew, that was her familiarity.

• 6:37Mark Hyman?

  Familiarity, and my, you know, my dad was broken because his mother, you know, was a child of thirteen and accidentally killed her sister when she was too, pushing her off the swing.

• 6:46Lewis Howes?

  Oh.

• 6:47Mark Hyman?

  And it was the pride of the family, had to sit at a different table, was completely neurotic and anxious. And that epigenome goes and through, it's translated through generations, and so, you know, it all makes sense, and so then I, I, my mom was super depressed and unhappy, and she used me to be her therapist.

• 7:04Lewis Howes?

  Oh, man.

• 7:05Mark Hyman?

  As a little kid, which is bad news.

• 7:06Lewis Howes?

  You repeated the pattern, like she would.

• 7:08Mark Hyman?

  Then I thought, oh, love is taking care of someone who's needy and broken.

• 7:10Lewis Howes?

  Right.

• 7:11Mark Hyman?

  So.

• 7:11Lewis Howes?

  Who needs me.

• 7:12Mark Hyman?

  Oh, yeah, so I would, I would, had the savior complex, and I would try to fill this hole that I had, this emptiness that I had, because I thought that, you know, if I did that, I could, I could kind of fill this emptiness that I have.

• 7:25Lewis Howes?

  Interesting.

• 7:26Mark Hyman?

  Of picking these people in a way that filled me up because I was, you know, serving them or taking care of them, or. And I, and it wasn't always exactly like that, but it was, I kept learning about this pattern. And until I really healed that, I was, I wasn't able to just be ready for love.

• 7:41Lewis Howes?

  Wow.

• 7:41Mark Hyman?

  So you kind of have to not find the right person, you have to be the right person.

• 7:44Lewis Howes?

  That's so true. What allowed you to heal it, and what, what allowed you to recognize it and then start the healing journey?

• 7:50Mark Hyman?

  Yeah, well, that.

• 7:50Lewis Howes?

  Which is a journey.

• 7:51Mark Hyman?

  Yeah, no, I've been doing, I, I, I intellectually understood it, but, you know.

• 7:55Lewis Howes?

  It's a physical.

• 7:56Mark Hyman?

  Yeah, but I really went through a process of using psychedelics to heal a lot of the trauma, uh, which, you know, is now emerging as a really valid way to start to re-pattern your neurology, literally change the structure and function of your neurons in your brain, these compounds. And I began to sort of do some inquiry. I decided to take like a break from relationships, and really do a deep in-dive, looking at my own mind, my own thoughts, my own beliefs, every day writing them down, kind of rewriting it, the story from my higher self.

• 8:27Lewis Howes?

  Wow.

• 8:28Mark Hyman?

  And then I, and then I kind of unpacked my whole life with a friend of mine who's a coach, a really amazing woman, Lauren Xander, and I was able to kind of see my whole childhood very differently, and, you know, talk about incest that happened to me, and things that I just had buried for fifty years. And then I, I saw this movie, Coda.

• 8:46Mark Hyman?

  Which was a Best Picture Academy Award winning film last year about children of deaf adults. C O D A means children of deaf adults. And it was my mother's story, not actually her story, but it was a say she was a child of here of deaf parents.

• 9:02Lewis Howes?

  Cause the child in the I still haven't seen yet, but the child is got a deaf family, right?

• 9:07Mark Hyman?

  Yeah, she's hearing and it's about her struggle to become in, you know, like disentangle from the dependency her parents had on her.

• 9:16Lewis Howes?

  Right? Holy cow.

• 9:17Mark Hyman?

  So that that was like, that just like hit me like a, like a lightning bolt and I just was sobbing and sobbing. I it took me hours and hours to watch the movie because I had to stop because I would just be like on the floor, just in this cathartic process. And I know that never really happened to me like that before. And, and after that happened, I kind of got what happened to my mother. I got what happened to me. I got, you know, what was going off in my own nervous system. And then I just felt free and like I felt light and I healed a lot of that. So it took me a while. I'm a slow learner. I'm good with medicine, but it's not.

• 9:54Lewis Howes?

  Okay, we all have our things.

• 9:56Mark Hyman?

  It took me a minute. And but I now I just feel like I have such a different wiring and a different nervous system. And it's, I feel way calmer and way less anxious in relationship and.

• 10:07Lewis Howes?

  How, I mean, where would you be had you not talked to that, you know, therapist friend and kind of look back at your entire history of your life and assessed it? If you didn't watch that movie, if you didn't do the psychedelics, kind of all those medicines in one, where would you be had you skipped it after your last relationship?

• 10:27Mark Hyman?

  You know, I always my joke, I said, I had a broken picker, you know? I still have a broken picker. I still would might try to find someone who isn't really the person that's going to be able to meet me, that's an equal and can, you know, have a healthy attachment style. It can, you know, be independent, but come together and just like really, it really was powerful.

• 10:47Lewis Howes?

  So I, yeah. That's incredible.

• 10:50Mark Hyman?

  Yeah.

• 10:50Lewis Howes?

  This all happened in the last couple of years.

• 10:51Mark Hyman?

  Yeah.

• 10:53Lewis Howes?

  So there's hope after sixty, even if you're keep choosing poorly.

• 10:56Mark Hyman?

  Totally, totally.

• 10:57Lewis Howes?

  That's incredible.

• 10:58Mark Hyman?

  Yeah, they just got me free. And I think, you know, a lot of these cultures don't have to deal with this stuff. I mean, of course, there's always family drama and this and that. But I think, you know, they just have such a level of of connection and community and mutual support and happiness and joy as part of living that we've sort of lost. And I think that was a big learning for me.

• 11:17Lewis Howes?

  And how did you feel beforehand, like in the previous forty years of different marriages and relationships? Did you, you said you feel free and lighter. Did you never feel free?

• 11:27Mark Hyman?

  No.

• 11:27Lewis Howes?

  In marriage or in relationship?

• 11:29Mark Hyman?

  No, I didn't. I always felt.

• 11:30Lewis Howes?

  What was the feeling?

• 11:31Mark Hyman?

  I didn't know until afterwards. You know, you don't know how to know a horse is standing on your foot until it gets off. It was kind of like that, like, wow, I was always so anxious and kind of trying to hold on to love and keep love and be afraid of losing love and want someone to love me. And it just was like such a weird dynamic that I was embedded in that I didn't even fully see.

• 11:49Lewis Howes?

  Really?

• 11:50Mark Hyman?

  Yeah.

• 11:51Lewis Howes?

  This is, I'm so excited you're sharing this. This is powerful. I think a lot of people need to see this and hear this from you, Mark, because they see you as this, I don't know, what are you, thirty, thirty time New York Times bestselling author, you know, this, this individual who's done so well and been so successful in many areas of life. And I'm not saying that, you know, the marriages and the relationships you were in were all like failures. I'm sure you had great love and connection and moments and things like that, but they weren't, you know, it sounds like the right fit and you didn't feel like you were free inside.

• 12:24Mark Hyman?

  Right.

• 12:24Lewis Howes?

  And maybe they didn't feel the same thing either. So I'm not saying they were bad and wrong or something. But to hear you talk about this, this healing journey at this stage, as someone who studies healing and as someone who studies medicine and that studies all these things, even you had to learn how to heal relationships. You knew about the body stuff and food and medicine.

• 12:44Mark Hyman?

  For sure.

• 12:45Lewis Howes?

  But it was the healing, the relationship and the childhood wound that you carried with you all those years.

• 12:50Mark Hyman?

  And what's interesting now, Louis, is in our culture, we're starting to have a language for this and the acceptance of this and, you know, the sort of not seeing mental illness as a stigma, but as a consequence of a lot of cultural and personal trauma. Right? I mean, just living in our culture today is traumatic. You just open the newspaper, listen to the news or the amount of conflict and strife and, you know, just economic inequities and all the things that we're dealing with, climate change. I mean, it's a very psychologically stressful moment of history, but. You know, we, we also can shift our relationship to that by understanding how our brains work and our nervous systems work and start to actually not necessarily get caught up in all that and kind of reset our systems. So, one of the key things I talk about in the book is mindset.

• 13:34Mark Hyman?

  You know, is how our minds really play a role in our longevity. And if we don't get that straight, we're screwed. Like, when people kill themselves by their thoughts, right? Literally.

• 13:47Lewis Howes?

  And give me some examples. What do you mean? How do they kill themselves?

• 13:49Mark Hyman?

  I mean.

• 13:50Lewis Howes?

  Well, if they have suicidal thoughts, they'll lead themselves to killing themselves.

• 13:54Mark Hyman?

  I mean, it's all about belief, right? So, when you look at voodoo, for example, I mean, you put a voodoo hex on somebody, boom, somebody can drop dead, you know? Like, one of my mentors, who very much inspired me before I went to medicine, was Bernie Siegel, who had loved medicine and miracles, who's this kind of Yale oncologist, bald guy, so cute, writes with a purple, a purple pen, letters that he used to write me, and that before email. And, and he, you know, he talked about these studies where they would like tell this cancer patient that they found this great new cure and they gave them this pill, it was a placebo, and their tumors shrunk overnight. And then they, they told them like, you know, a month later, two months later, oh, they found it didn't work so well, and the tumors came flying back. So, like, that's the power of the pharmacy in our mind.

• 14:38Lewis Howes?

  This is fascinating. I'm so, I'm still kind of amazed that this all happened in the last couple of years. So, after the movie, you had this catharsis experience, right? And you felt lighter after that?

• 14:49Mark Hyman?

  Yeah.

• 14:49Lewis Howes?

  You felt you were released?

• 14:50Mark Hyman?

  I felt free.

• 14:51Lewis Howes?

  Right after this on-the-floor sobbing moment?

• 14:55Mark Hyman?

  Yeah, it's hard to explain it, but I just felt like I was flying. Like, I just felt like I'd been carrying this weight my whole life, it just was gone.

• 15:01Lewis Howes?

  Do you feel like it was completely, do you feel like your body has, your nervous system was fully healed after that? Or has there been moments of like triggers and kind of the PTSD feelings in your nervous system? Or like?

• 15:12Mark Hyman?

  I think it's echoes and shadows more that come back now. Like, that I can recognize and go, oh, all right, whatever. It's like, it's not like it grabs me like it used to.

• 15:21Lewis Howes?

  Wow.

• 15:23Lewis Howes?

  This is fascinating, this all happened in the last couple of years.

• 15:25Mark Hyman?

  Yeah, it's pretty cool. And then I began to think about just aging and longevity in general. And how do we build a life that creates healing in our body? Whether it's healing our trauma. And I have a whole section in the book about healing trauma, because that's a key part.

• 15:40Lewis Howes?

  It's huge.

• 15:41Mark Hyman?

  And some of the things that are now available, like ketamine and still like ganglion blocks. And increasingly, probably by 2024 MDMA will be available legally for psychedelic assisted therapy. And maybe psilocybin, I think was legalized in Colorado now and in Oregon. So it's all coming. And I think there's so many different modalities for people to choose from that we never had before.

• 16:05Lewis Howes?

  Sure. How important is expressing your emotions, crying, laughing, in living longer and healthier?

• 16:14Mark Hyman?

  Well, I do a lot of laughing and I do some crying. And I think in my current relationship, I'm the crier. Like if we're watching a movie or a show, you know, like whatever. Where we're listening to a speech at a wedding, I'm the one crying. It's so funny because yesterday I was on a flight and I watched Coco, the movie Coco.

• 16:34Mark Hyman?

  There's a little guy next to me and I'm literally, I kid you not, I cried four times watching Coco. The music and the storytelling, I'm like, this is a cartoon and I'm crying. But it was so beautiful and I was telling Martha about it and she was like, yeah, it's such a beautiful. Because it's all about family, it's all about connection, it's all about like sharing your music with the world. And this, you know, beautiful story. But so you feel like you're the crier in the relationship.

• 16:59Lewis Howes?

  But how powerful is crying as an emotion and laughing?

• 17:04Mark Hyman?

  I think it's being able to be free and express, whatever it is. Like being able to not have to shut down and shut off. And to learn how to do it in a way that's not destructive, right? To do it in a way that's loving and kind and thoughtful. There's always a way of getting expressed without hurting somebody else.

• 17:21Lewis Howes?

  Yes.

• 17:22Mark Hyman?

  So I think we tend in our culture to lash out and to be reactive and that's not good. So it's like, it's sort of like, it's like Viktor Frankl's idea of slowing things down. Like in between stimulus and response, there's a gap or a pause, right? And then that pauses the choice. So you can choose to slow down the whole process. And I'm friends with Tom Brady and he's like, you know, when I snap the ball. Everything's in slow motion. Like, everything just slows down. It's like...

• 17:50Lewis Howes?

  It's amazing.

• 17:51Mark Hyman?

  You think it all happens like in seconds, but like, he's like all the time in the world, right? Because everything just goes in slow motion because he's so present. So, we can do that in every moment. It just takes practice. It's a skill. You know, if you want to lift 50 pounds, well, you have to work at it, right? If you want to train your mind to work differently, you have to work at it. You have to investigate your mind. You have to... That's what, you know, all these practices, they're ancient. You know, we, we in our culture are really good with outer technology, but places like Tibet, they were, they were really experimenting with inner technology for thousands of years and, and learn all sorts of skills about mastering the mind. So, mastering your body is key, but mastering your mind is also a key to longevity.

• 18:30Lewis Howes?

  And it sounds like mastering your emotions and your heart is a key as well.

• 18:34Mark Hyman?

  Yeah, but your mind is what regulates your emotions. Now, people are arguing about this, but what happens first is your thought, and then the feeling, right? And then the emotion.

• 18:44Lewis Howes?

  Sure.

• 18:45Mark Hyman?

  Right? Because you have, even if it's an instantaneous thing, there's some thought that precedes it, even if it's a subconscious thought that precedes the feeling or emotion.

• 18:54Lewis Howes?

  So, you never have the feeling first? Unless you don't have the ability to think, but then you probably want to be here.

• 19:01Mark Hyman?

  Right. Well, some people don't have that, but yeah.

• 19:05Lewis Howes?

  So, it's always a thought?

• 19:06Mark Hyman?

  Yeah.

• 19:07Lewis Howes?

  Or it's a... So, it can't be a feeling, huh? Because you have to think it first before you feel it?

• 19:12Mark Hyman?

  Yes, I think so. I think always, whether it's, it's like, it's...

• 19:15Lewis Howes?

  Like, if you smell something that brings back a memory, right? Is that a thought first?

• 19:20Mark Hyman?

  Yeah, or if you, you know, you see you're about to get in a car crash, you have the thought, "I'm going to die", and then your body goes into reaction. And it can happen in a millisecond. But like, you can have a millisecond thought, but it's always going to precede whatever it is.

• 19:32Lewis Howes?

  Sure, sure. So, I'm curious about the relationship stuff, because I think, because I think you don't talk about this a lot.

• 19:39Mark Hyman?

  I do a little bit. Yeah, but we can do it.

• 19:41Lewis Howes?

  And I think, I'm a, I'm starting to believe more and more that the relationship you have with yourself... Is massive, the way you view yourself, your beliefs, you're talking about this now, how you think about yourself, how you feel about yourself is key towards living a healthy life now, but also extending your life.

• 19:58Mark Hyman?

  Totally.

• 19:58Lewis Howes?

  And the way you view and, and think about relation, your intimate relationship. I used to feel like I was trapped all the time, you know, I was fearful and, and I felt like I was trapped and there was no way out, I couldn't be myself.

• 20:12Mark Hyman?

  Yeah.

• 20:12Lewis Howes?

  And that would make me feel unhealthy inside. It made me feel like I was a six out of a 10 every day.

• 20:17Mark Hyman?

  Yeah.

• 20:18Lewis Howes?

  Cause I felt like trapped, right? No, I'm doing that to myself. No one is, no one is trapping me, it's my fear and insecurity of like leaving the relationship or whatever it might be, or having the courage to communicate, all these things that I needed to learn. And so, the relationship we have with ourselves and with our intimate partner, I'm starting to learn is the most powerful, one of the most powerful things for longevity. Because we're going to, it's going to shape the actions we have, the decisions we make on a daily basis, how we show up, what we eat, the environment, all that stuff. How, what is the, some of the conversations you're having in your relationship about longevity? And about, you know, you're entering a new relationship from a different space, a healed space.

• 21:00Lewis Howes?

  Are you having different types of conversations than you never had before? If so, what are those?

• 21:04Mark Hyman?

  Yeah, I think they're really different. I mean, I think, uh, you know.

• 21:07Lewis Howes?

  And are you showing up as your whole self finally? Is that what's?

• 21:10Mark Hyman?

  I, I think I'm able to, I think I'm able to be free and independent and still fully connected.

• 21:17Lewis Howes?

  Wow.

• 21:18Mark Hyman?

  All the time. So, as opposed to feeling dependent or needing.

• 21:22Lewis Howes?

  So you're unattached. You're highly engaged, but you have low attachment.

• 21:25Mark Hyman?

  Fully committed, but not like.

• 21:27Lewis Howes?

  Low attachment, yeah.

• 21:28Mark Hyman?

  I'm securely attached, what they say is securely attached, as opposed to being insecurely attached or avoidant or, like, there's all these styles of attachment. But there's a healthy attachment style. A lot of us have, have attachment disorders because if we weren't loved well as kids or we, you know, we had various kinds of traumas. So we have these attachment disorders. Uh, and, and I think I had more of an anxious attachment disorder. Uh, and, and I think that through healing that, I'm able to sort of be, able to just be present to whatever is and not be in reaction. And that's such a powerfully different way, whatever it is we're doing. And my partner's also extremely.

• 22:06Mark Hyman?

  Self-aware and extremely talented at communicating.

• 22:10Lewis Howes?

  That's beautiful.

• 22:11Mark Hyman?

  And you know, she has her own stuff that she works through. But we do it together as if it's a, as if it's a gift that we are able to unpack together.

• 22:20Lewis Howes?

  Really?

• 22:20Mark Hyman?

  As opposed to something that's oppositional. Like you have to fix this, you have to do this, you did this, you did that. Like that's terrible. So we go, oh, here's a trigger. I felt triggered by blah, blah, blah.

• 22:33Lewis Howes?

  How do you handle it if, if you're in that?

• 22:35Mark Hyman?

  We, we, we really deeply listen to each other. We don't react and then we, we take it as a third entity. That's something for us to take care of together. As opposed to something, you better fix this or I'm out. You know, like, and it's like, oh, you know, like today I was like, I learned from my partner that she doesn't like hosting parties. You know, we're having a party and I asked her, you know, to help with something. And she was like, I don't like hosting parties. I was like, okay.

• 23:01Lewis Howes?

  Now I know.

• 23:02Mark Hyman?

  Noted, but like it's like I could have reacted and got upset and mad and it's like, I had a total whole story in my head. It's this, but I'm like, oh, okay. Well, she, this is what she needs. She's like, I don't like doing this and that. So like this, right. You know, like rather than having to like fix it or figure out why or like it's, she doesn't like chocolate or she doesn't like strawberries or whatever. It's fine. I don't like doing everything either. I don't, I don't really like, you know, whiskey, but I like tequila. It's fine. Who cares?

• 23:26Lewis Howes?

  You know? Do you think you'd be able to analytically heal, like just thinking? If you would have just thought about these things versus the, the physical releases that you had as well?

• 23:39Mark Hyman?

  I think it's somatic. I think a lot of this is buried in our tissues. You know, the book called The Body Keeps Score by trauma. And I think, you know, if we, if we don't learn how to somatically release this stuff, it just, it is an intellectual exercise. It doesn't happen.

• 23:51Lewis Howes?

  It doesn't work fully.

• 23:52Mark Hyman?

  It helps, but it's not, it's not enough.

• 23:54Lewis Howes?

  Wow. I'm curious about the, in terms of.

• 24:00Lewis Howes?

  The things that will decrease your lifespan at night. You know, a lot of people talk about the morning routines, but I'm curious about the evening routines. That will decrease lifespan longevity.

• 24:10Mark Hyman?

  Well, that's a great question. You know, there's a really amazing book I read years ago called Lights Out. And it was a book that was looking at the research on the harmful impact of the light bulb on human health. And it was pretty convincing in showing that because we're not following the natural rhythms of the sun,

• 24:31Mark Hyman?

  we're actually altering our biology in ways that damage our health. So when you're exposed to LED nights at night, to fluorescent lights at night, to full spectrum light bulbs at night, incandescent light bulbs, it's not normal for our physiology for 200,000 years.

• 24:50Lewis Howes?

  Sure.

• 24:51Mark Hyman?

  And all of a sudden, the last 100,000 of the last, I mean, the last 100 of the 200,000 years, we're all of a sudden exposed to this light bulb. Our brains don't process it properly, and so we inhibit melatonin, we don't sleep as well. We increase cortisol. And there's really crazy studies on how this increases obesity, heart disease, cancer, dementia. And that's just being exposed to light at night. So now there's this advent of an understanding of how we might block blue light, which is what you need in the morning, right? You want to be exposed to bright light from the sun the first thing in the morning. 20 minutes with no sunglasses, that's great. But at night, it's not a good idea.

• 25:32Lewis Howes?

  Sure.

• 25:32Mark Hyman?

  So there are now red light bulbs that only have red light and no blue light. There's blue blocker glasses where you can put on glasses at night and wear those at night around the house. Screens are the worst thing at night, so that's a horrible thing that people do. They go to bed with their phone, they wake up with their phone. It's like they spend more time with their phone with their partner. But my nephew is like, "Look, my screen time is only five hours today." I'm like, "Five hours? Now you can do is five hours, you have five hours, right? You could make all the food for your week, you could exercise, you could write a book, you could make a song, you could, whatever, you know, every day." And I think we also... Are are not actually winding down. So we go, go, go, go, go, then hit the bed, expect to sleep.

• 26:16Mark Hyman?

  But we can't do that. So having a routine, and I talk a lot about the power of sleep and longevity and the power of sleep in the brain, but we're probably sleeping a couple hours less than we did throughout most of human history. And some people even less than that. And that has a huge impact on our cognitive function. Especially at night, we have a brain cleaning system.

• 26:34Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 26:34Mark Hyman?

  Called the glymphatic system, which is like the lymph system for the brain. So it's like the cleanup crew comes at night and cleans up your brain from all the garbage that accumulates from metabolic waste and stuff for the day. Well, you can, if you don't sleep, that's not working. And you get that if you like go to bed and you wake up and you don't sleep enough, you feel foggy and tired. If you get a good eight, nine, 10 hours sleep, you wake up and you're like boom, everything's crystal clear and your brain's working and. I mean, it's not rocket science. So it's not just because you haven't slept, there's a biology of what's happening. So you're producing nasty proteins and inflammation and all kinds of stuff. And also, I think we, you know, are supposed to way too much uh, sound and light and stimulus at night. Temperature regulation is not good. So there's a lot of really cool devices like the eight sleep bed and, you know,

• 27:20Mark Hyman?

  another one, I forget the name of it, but a cooler or whatever is. And, and basically you can put in your bed and lower the temperature. We do better sleeping at about 65 to 68, 75, 8, 70, 67 degrees. And if we do that, our bodies work better, we sleep better. I know for me, if it's hot, I don't sleep.

• 27:37Lewis Howes?

  I can't sleep well, yeah.

• 27:38Mark Hyman?

  Yeah.

• 27:38Lewis Howes?

  We put it at 67, 68.

• 27:40Mark Hyman?

  Yeah.

• 27:40Lewis Howes?

  Yeah. But then it's like your face is like cold. So you have to figure, that's why the cooler, the chili pad or whatever it's called.

• 27:46Mark Hyman?

  Yeah, and that's great. And the eight sleep, you can have one side that's hot for your, for your partner and one is cool for you.

• 27:52Lewis Howes?

  Is that what eight sleep does?

• 27:52Mark Hyman?

  Yeah.

• 27:53Lewis Howes?

  Cold on one side and the other one's?

• 27:54Mark Hyman?

  You can do whatever you want.

• 27:55Lewis Howes?

  That's interesting.

• 27:55Mark Hyman?

  Progress. You can just like put on a king sized bed, you can, it's divided in half. So you can control your half.

• 28:01Lewis Howes?

  It's pretty nice.

• 28:01Mark Hyman?

  And you can, and also you can control it through the night. You want it cooler in the morning, cooler at night, hotter in the middle of the night, whatever.

• 28:06Lewis Howes?

  That's cool.

• 28:07Mark Hyman?

  The best sleep I ever have is when I go camping and I'm like winter camping.

• 28:10Lewis Howes?

  Really?

• 28:11Mark Hyman?

  I sleep like.

• 28:12Lewis Howes?

  I just feel like I, you know, slept like

• 28:13Mark Hyman?

  Pass out.

• 28:14Lewis Howes?

  Cause you probably go to bed at like eight o'clock at night.

• 28:16Mark Hyman?

  Yeah, but you say like 10 hours.

• 28:17Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 28:18Mark Hyman?

  It's like

• 28:18Lewis Howes?

  You watch the stars, you have a fire, you like tell some stories.

• 28:22Mark Hyman?

  Well, this is what Exactly, that's what we always did historically, you know? We would just like work, work, work, watch TV, go to bed, or be on our phone, or write emails to the last minute and text and then go to sleep. It's just our bodies are not designed for that. So in the book, I talk a lot about evening routines and what you can do and, you know, the temperature, the sound, the light, hot baths at night, epsom salt, meditation, whatever, whatever works for you.

• 28:44Lewis Howes?

  Warm bath at night works well too.

• 28:46Mark Hyman?

  Oh yeah, hot bath, epsom salt, brings you right down.

• 28:50Lewis Howes?

  Right down, boom. What about, um, in the book, you also talk about the seven core biological systems? And how we can use them to stop and reverse biological aging?

• 28:59Mark Hyman?

  Yeah.

• 29:00Lewis Howes?

  What are some of those?

• 29:01Mark Hyman?

  Yeah, so, so functional medicine is a very important paradigm shift in healthcare, which looks at the body as an ecosystem, not as a bunch of different separate parts. So as I was talking about earlier, the hallmarks of aging

• 29:11Lewis Howes?

  Yes.

• 29:12Mark Hyman?

  Are what scientists are now saying, underlies all disease. That's a huge advance. Cause instead of like 155,000 diseases, there's like 10 things that go wrong. And if we fix those 10 things, we get rid of all the rest.

• 29:25Lewis Howes?

  Wow.

• 29:25Mark Hyman?

  Right? But then the question comes, what's the cause of those hallmarks of aging? So functional medicine is the medicine of why? Not what disease you have and what drug to give, or even what hallmark is there? But why is there a problem with this particular hallmark? Why are there epigenetic changes? Why are your mitochondria not working? Why are your nutrients not being sensed properly? Why are you making zombie cells? Why do you have inflammation? Why do you have damaged proteins? Why do you have, you know, stem cells getting pooped out? Like, that's the important question, right? So in functional medicine, we think that there are really simple answers to these questions. Uh, you're either dying of too much of something that's bugging your system that you need to get rid of,

• 30:09Mark Hyman?

  or too little of something you need for health. What are the ingredients for health that we need to get and help us thrive? Like I said, and I took the class on what causes disease, but not what causes health. Alright? So functional medicine is about the science of creating health. And in the framework of science of functional medicine, there are seven biological systems or networks. And it's a network of networks. They're not all separate, right? And these seven systems, again, underlie all disease. And the imbalances in these systems cause disease. And it's either too much of toxins, allergens, bad food, stress, microbes, you know, microbiome stuff, and not enough of the right ingredients for health, the right nutrition, nutrients, balance of hormones,

• 30:52Mark Hyman?

  light, air, water, sleep, exercise, you know, deep rest, community, meaning, purpose, love, relationships. These are all the ingredients for health, right? When those are too much or too little of those things, it causes disturbances in these seven systems. And what are they? Well, there's your microbiome in your gut. Yeah. There's your immune inflammatory system, we call that defense and repair. Your energy system, how you make energy in your cells and mitochondria. And by the way, these are also, in a way, some of the hallmarks of aging, right? Sure, sure, sure, yeah. And then detoxification, which isn't really talked much about in the hallmarks of aging, but it's key because toxins cause a lot of the hallmarks of aging. So how do you detox your body? How do you process your metabolic toxins, environmental toxins? Then your transport system,

• 31:37Mark Hyman?

  which is your circulation and lymph system. And then there's communication systems, which is your hormones, your transmitters, the nutrient sensing systems, how it all works. And lastly is your structural system, what you're made of, you know, from your subcellular structures, your mitochondria, your cell membranes, all the way to your bones and muscles and everything else. So that's what we think of. And so my job as a functional medicine doctor is to understand what's causing the imbalance in this particular person. So if you have, just because you know the name of the disease does not mean you know what's wrong with you. You could have, you know, 10 people with heart disease or diabetes or Alzheimer's or rheumatoid arthritis, and each of them might have different causes. You know, one person with rheumatoid arthritis might have a gluten sensitivity. Another person might have a parasite.

• 32:21Mark Hyman?

  Another person might have mercury poisoning. Another person might have a problem with their microbiome. Another person might have some other factors. So it's really about looking at the personalized approach to understand the root cause of each person's dysfunction. And yes, there are certain ways the body manifests dysfunction. And there's a limited number of ways, right? I always say there's only so many ways your body can say ouch. Yeah. But there's a myriad of causes. But from this functional medicine perspective, we look at what are the root causes of the hallmarks of aging? How do we get these seven systems in balance? And that will fix those hallmarks of aging. Because a lot of scientists now in the longevity space, and by the way, there's billions of dollars flowing into this space because a lot of very wealthy billionaires don't want to die.

• 33:04Mark Hyman?

  So they're putting billions of dollars in, like Jeff Bezos and, you know, Calico from Google and, you know, Yuri Milner. All these people are just pouring money in. Because they want to live longer. I think it's great. I think it's great because the government isn't funding it. They spend like a couple hundred million dollars a year on aging, studying aging, which is ridiculous because that's, you know, we spent $6 billion on cancer and yet if we cured cancer, we'd have a couple of years' life extension. If we fixed aging, we'd get 100, we'd get 30 years. And it's not just about this hedonistic pursuit of living longer and this selfish idea, I don't want to die. It's about, think about a society where you have the value of the wisdom and experience and the knowledge that comes from living a while. Yeah. Now, not everybody gets wiser as they go older. I've found that out for sure.

• 33:49Mark Hyman?

  But a lot of you'll do. And then any contribution they could make if they're fit and healthy. Now, if they're sick and diseased, it's going to be a huge drain on society. But the truth is that these studies have shown that if you are taking care of yourself, you live a lot longer and your health span equals your lifespan. I mean, you basically don't spend the last 20% of your life decrepit and diseased, which is what is average now. So let's say you live to be 80, the last, you know, let's say 20 years of your life, you're on the downhill. Whereas with the studies on health span, if you, and this was one by James Fries, I talked about in the book, was published years ago in the New England Journal of Medicine. They basically looked at three habits. Keep your ideal body weight, don't smoke.

• 34:34Mark Hyman?

  And exercise. Right? Not a ton of stuff, right? And they found that when people did that, they not only lived longer, but they died quickly, painlessly, and cheaply.

• 34:45Lewis Howes?

  Really?

• 34:46Mark Hyman?

  And didn't cost a lot to the healthcare system.

• 34:48Lewis Howes?

  Wow.

• 34:48Mark Hyman?

  Whereas people who didn't do those things died earlier, but died long, painful, expensive deaths.

• 34:55Lewis Howes?

  So three things. Keep the ideal body weight, don't smoke, and exercise. And you'll die better.

• 35:03Mark Hyman?

  Exactly. So, you know, I want to have my health span equal my lifespan. I want to be able to go for a hike on my last day of my life at 120, like you said at the beginning.

• 35:10Lewis Howes?

  That's amazing.

• 35:11Mark Hyman?

  You know, make love and go to bed, and that's it.

• 35:14Lewis Howes?

  And then just don't wake up.

• 35:15Mark Hyman?

  Say goodbye.

• 35:17Lewis Howes?

  That's amazing. And do people do that in the blue zones? Do you see that they're...

• 35:21Mark Hyman?

  They do. They really have... Yeah, it's very interesting. I mean, my friend, Jeff Blain, is a father of functional medicine, tells the story of his grandfather, who was, I think, almost 100. And they had a big Thanksgiving dinner, everybody was here, happy. He's like, hey, everybody, it's been a great life. I love you all. This is it. I'm gonna go. And he like went to bed and like after a great dinner and walked to bed and went to sleep and never woke up.

• 35:43Lewis Howes?

  Come on. He was happy and everything was good?

• 35:46Mark Hyman?

  Great, yeah.

• 35:47Lewis Howes?

  And then he didn't wake up?

• 35:48Mark Hyman?

  He's like, I'm done, I'm done.

• 35:49Lewis Howes?

  No way.

• 35:50Mark Hyman?

  Yeah. I've heard this story many times.

• 35:52Lewis Howes?

  Come on.

• 35:52Mark Hyman?

  I've heard this story many times.

• 35:54Lewis Howes?

  Really?

• 35:54Mark Hyman?

  Yeah.

• 35:55Lewis Howes?

  That's incredible. He was healthy, though? He was fine or healthy enough?

• 35:59Mark Hyman?

  He seemed healthy, like, I mean, you know, was able to get up from the table and do his things and hang out with his family and...

• 36:04Lewis Howes?

  And he was like, thank you for the last great dinner.

• 36:07Mark Hyman?

  Yeah, pretty much.

• 36:08Lewis Howes?

  That's incredible.

• 36:10Mark Hyman?

  So, yeah, your health span can equal your lifespan. That's what the point of this book is. If you keep working on your biological age through the, all the strategies and the tools and very practical application of the science in the book, Young Forever, you can increase your health span. You can reverse your biological age. And we know how to do this. It's not hard.

• 36:30Lewis Howes?

  Yeah. What do you think is something that you're gonna learn in this next decade? You know, you've learned so much in the last decade with all the new research and science and studies that have come along in the last decade. Now going in from 60s into, you know, decade from now to your 70s, what do you think is gonna happen for you?

• 36:48Mark Hyman?

  Personally?

• 36:49Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 36:50Mark Hyman?

  Or in science and medicine?

• 36:52Lewis Howes?

  Both.

• 36:53Mark Hyman?

  I mean, I think, you know, it's the most exciting time right now in medicine science because even as we're all getting sicker and dying younger and life expectancy is going down in America, the acceleration and pace of scientific advances and the convergence of a number of different phenomena from systems biology to artificial intelligence to the genomic revolution to functional medicine, systems biology, to big data computing is just blowing up how we're going to be understanding the body. So imagine a future where you'll be able to get a panel of lab tests, put your body through a whole body MRI, sequence your entire genome, your microbiome, have a bio end sensor implanted that will track everything in real time, over thousands of biomarkers, and give you feedback in real time about exactly what you should do, how much you

• 37:38Mark Hyman?

  sleep, what you should tweak, what you should eat, what you shouldn't eat. Like, it would be so mind blowing to completely keep track of everything all the time. Like, your computer has billions of sensors, right? And if your tires are low, "Oh, God, my tire is low on the left back tire." Like, how great is that? We don't have that, right? You go to your doctor, you get a checkup, he does your exam, and checks a panel of blood tests that hasn't changed in a hundred years. You know, like, it's like, go on. You know, like, we are in a very different era of medicine, and it's happening at such a pace. So, the clinical practice of medicine today is not that, but it's coming very fast. So I'm excited about that. I think I'm going to learn a lot about, more about how the body works through the use of these big data analytics and artificial intelligence and machine learning applied

• 38:21Mark Hyman?

  to literally gigabytes and gigabytes of your own personal health data. I wish we're soon to be able to access it, it'll be in the cloud. Sure. And you'll be able to sort of learn so much from it and compare it to others. So I think that's really exciting. On a personal level, you know, I'm sort of excited about continuing to experiment with my own biological age and my own well-being and my own health and my own spiritual growth, and to feel like I'm just beginning. I honestly feel like I'm 20. Wow. I feel like, you know, when you're 20, you go, "God, what am I going to be when I grow up? What am I going to do?" Really? Kind of, yeah, because I kind of check the boxes. You know, have my family, have my kids, you know, have meaning and purpose, have a good relationship. Your career. Career is good. I'm like, I don't have any more mountains to climb in the way of proving anything.

• 39:04Mark Hyman?

  And yet I have the health and the vitality and the resources to actually reimagine the rest of my life, the next 60 years, right? That's incredible. What do the next 60 years look like? What do I want to do? Where do I want to go? What do I want to be? So like, I'm getting better at surfing. I'm gonna go heli skiing this year. I'm gonna go, you know, we're gonna go climbing the mountains in South America, in Patagonia. I'm gonna, you know, just, I just do whatever I want to do. It's amazing. But the truth is, and I'm 63, and when I think back when I was a kid, man, 63 was frickin' old. You know, 63, they weren't doing too good. The pot bellies and the gray hair and the puffy face. Kane. I'm like, I'm like, no way.

• 39:47Mark Hyman?

  Like, I'm like, it just doesn't have to be that way, you know? And, you know, I had friends over in Hawaii visiting me last year, and I was riding my bike every day, working out, and, you know, I had like 30-year-old friends, I'm like, let's go for a bike ride. I'm like, okay. And these are not people who are out of shape, or overweight, or unhealthy. These are really healthy people. One of them was like a, you know, like a college, you know, college D1 soccer player. And I'm riding my hill, straight up, seven miles up the hill, and she's like, ugh. And I'm like, you know, and one of them had to turn back, and I'm like, wow. You know, it's amazing to see that if you learn the science of how to create health, that you can continue to evolve and improve and optimize your health at any age.

• 40:32Mark Hyman?

  It's beautiful, man. It's exciting. I'm gonna be, I'm gonna turn 40 next year. Oh, wow. If you could go back to your 40-year-old self and give me advice for three things to focus on from 40 until 60, what would those three things be that you would tell me or tell your younger 40-year-old self that you wish you would have done? I would say... Really, really, really invite play and joy in your life. You know, don't wait, you know. I'm reading this book called Die With Zero. Which is a great, a great book, meditating on the idea that, you know, we, we save our money and we squirrel our nuts away and we don't have all these experiences. And, you know, in my life, I haven't done a lot of stuff.

• 41:16Mark Hyman?

  You know, I have one house, my car is five years old, I paid for it. It's a little blah blah, I'm like, I don't have a lot of stuff, you know. But I love experiences. So I will spend money on experiences. You know, I'll go on safari or I'll go, you know, learn how to surf in Costa Rica for a month. Or I'll, you know, go, go to do some, you know, incredible backcountry skiing experience with friends. Or I'll, I'll invite, you know, I'm inviting like thirty of my closest friends to Italy to go in a villa for a week. And, you know, have all kinds of, you know, fun experiences together. So, experience is really what matters and what brings the joy to life. So building relationships, building connections, building community. It's so central to health and wellbeing in life. And I did that, but I, I definitely worked too hard. I definitely did not give myself enough time for that.

• 42:01Mark Hyman?

  The second thing is, I probably would have started working out sooner. I mean, I always did bike riding and tennis and yoga and I just, I was like, I, gyms are stinky. I don't like weights. If I do ten pushups, it hurts the next day, I don't like this. So, when I was fifty, I couldn't do ten pushups. And now I can drop and do eighty without a stop. Incredible. Yeah. So it's, it's like, like, you know, it took me a minute, but I, I actually didn't think maybe that long. And I use the Tom Brady TB12 Sports Training Bands, which is a lot easier on the body. And it's amazing. So I feel we, you know, I would have probably doubled down on that a little earlier. I think I also would have probably done more work on my own.

• 42:51Mark Hyman?

  On my own trauma that I couldn't really identify then, I think so. And we didn't have the language for it. There wasn't, it wasn't in the zeitgeist like it is now. There weren't people talking about it. Some of the psychedelics wasn't really, you know, a thing. So I think, I think there's a bunch of stuff that I probably would have done around that. I think, I'm always eating healthy. I've always, you know, done well. I think the other thing I, I definitely did that, and you can see from the picture. I was, you know, vegetarian, vegan, and I was kind of thin, but, but I had no muscle.

• 43:21Lewis Howes?

  My right.

• 43:21Mark Hyman?

  You know? And I was act, like I could run five miles. I could ride my bike a hundred miles. I wasn't unfit, but I.

• 43:28Lewis Howes?

  You weren't strong.

• 43:29Mark Hyman?

  I didn't have the kind of muscle mass that I think is so essential to longevity.

• 43:33Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 43:34Mark Hyman?

  So the sooner you start building muscle, the better off you are. It's really a key part of longevity.

• 43:40Lewis Howes?

  Yeah. This is beautiful, Mark. I appreciate you. Your book, Young Forever, The Secrets to Living Your Longest, Healthiest Life. You guys can get this. It's got a step-by-step program.

• 43:51Mark Hyman?

  And by the way, the book's not all about relationships and trauma, just so you know.

• 43:56Lewis Howes?

  It's not about that, but I think it's an important component.

• 43:58Mark Hyman?

  It definitely includes that.

• 43:59Lewis Howes?

  And I love how, you know, I've got a, I've got a book coming out as well after yours called The Greatness Mindset. And the first section of it is about healing. I think it's really, you know, for me, learning the lessons of healing and how it's set me free as well. I feel like now I can go much higher in every area of life with that. Was before it was like this, it was like grinding it to get there, you know? And it was harder.

• 44:21Mark Hyman?

  Yeah.

• 44:21Lewis Howes?

  So I think it's all about our beliefs and our healing and the mindset of it first. About longevity and about relationships and life and everything.

• 44:29Mark Hyman?

  Yeah, you look, you look brighter and happier and younger than I've seen you.

• 44:32Lewis Howes?

  I feel good, man.

• 44:32Mark Hyman?

  In a while.

• 44:33Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, I've been a little tired. I was on a trip, but yeah, I feel good in general. But, um, yeah, it's good to be alive, man.

• 44:38Mark Hyman?

  Good to be alive.

• 44:39Lewis Howes?

  Every day I'm grateful. There's so much joy, peace, love, affection, you know, freedom. It feels incredible.

• 44:45Mark Hyman?

  I think it's also, the also key is like living in the moment, like as much as possible. Whatever you're experiencing. You know, whatever you're doing, be in it. Because we've lived so much of our life distracted and disconnected. And so whether you're washing the dishes, or making love, or working, or climbing a mountain, like, do that thing.

• 45:06Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, absolutely. I want people to get your book, Young Forever. Make sure you guys pick up a copy. Where can we go to support you for it?

• 45:14Mark Hyman?

  Everywhere. Go to youngforeverbook.com. Come on and learn more and get goodies. Come along with the book. Go to Dr. Mark Hyman's social media, DrHyman.com. Any bookstore, online, offline, you can get the book.

• 45:27Lewis Howes?

  It's exciting. We're gonna throw up a photo as well. You have to send me that photo of you when you were 40 to now. We'll put it up on screen for you guys to see the process of this. But this is amazing. Make sure you guys get a copy for your friends as well. Powerful book, powerful information. I want to acknowledge you, Mark, for your transformation. It's incredible. Because I think healing is one of the hardest things to do.

• 45:48Mark Hyman?

  Mm-hmm.

• 45:49Lewis Howes?

  Especially, you know, healing the wounds of our past. The inner child wound, whatever you want to call it. But especially as men, I feel like it's harder for us to go back and address the things we're most ashamed of, or afraid of, or insecure of, or guilty around, or whatever it might be, and start doing the work. So for you to do that in your early 60s is really inspiring.

• 46:11Mark Hyman?

  Well, I'm a little slow.

• 46:13Lewis Howes?

  But it's inspiring to see that it doesn't matter what age you are.

• 46:16Mark Hyman?

  No, it's true.

• 46:17Lewis Howes?

  You can go back, you can revisit, and you can start the healing process in the journey. It doesn't mean you're a perfect human being. And I'm sure you're gonna have, you know, challenges and flaws and things like this in the future. But to do that work and give yourself more healing energy

• 46:31Mark Hyman?

  Yeah.

• 46:31Lewis Howes?

  for a longer life and a happier life, it's a beautiful thing. So I acknowledge you for that, my friend. It's inspiring. Thank you for the wisdom for what I need to do when I hit 40. It's really doing it right now. But from 40 to 60, where are you spending the most time on social media these days? And how else can we be of service to you besides getting the book?

• 46:51Mark Hyman?

  You know, I have a great team and we put out tons of content that's free about how to upgrade your life and your biological software. So I think Instagram and

• 47:02Lewis Howes?

  The podcast.

• 47:02Mark Hyman?

  Podcast, Doctor's Pharmacy Podcast I have, which is always up there with yours, back and forth. It's great to see up there. So I think that's a really beautiful forum for exploring ideas in depth like you do on the podcast here. And I think it's, for me, it's a labor of love because I don't find it work to sit with extraordinary people and learn things that I want to learn and hear, you know, things that expand my mind and my heart. It's the best job in the world.

• 47:33Lewis Howes?

  It's amazing, right? It's so much fun. I love it. Well, final question, what's your definition of greatness?

• 47:39Mark Hyman?

  My definition of greatness is freedom. If you can be free physically, spiritually, emotionally, in your community, if you can have a free mind. You know, it's like that Bob Marley song, you know, I can't remember the exact line of it, I'm bad with lyrics, but it's like, only ourselves can free our minds, you know? And it's like, we have to free our minds to unlock all this stuff.

• 48:08Lewis Howes?

  Absolutely.

• 48:08Mark Hyman?

  Because what I'm telling you is not hard. I mean, there's some things that are really easy and inexpensive and great to do. There's something a little more advanced, but these things are not difficult and it's step by step and you can follow it. But if your mind's locked up, you're not going to be able to do it.

• 48:25Lewis Howes?

  Sure.

• 48:25Mark Hyman?

  You're going to want that donut.

• 48:27Lewis Howes?

  Exactly, man. It's my challenge. Actually, I have one more question for you since I've asked you this before, but I feel like you're in a new space in your life with the healing process you've been in. So it's the three truths question. Imagine it's your last day on earth, you live 120.

• 48:44Mark Hyman?

  Maybe 150. I'm not sure.

• 48:45Lewis Howes?

  150.

• 48:46Mark Hyman?

  I'm not sure.

• 48:46Lewis Howes?

  You live exactly however you want to live, you live that long.

• 48:49Mark Hyman?

  Yeah.

• 48:49Lewis Howes?

  You have the Thanksgiving dinner with all your friends and then you go to sleep and that's your last day.

• 48:54Mark Hyman?

  Yeah.

• 48:55Lewis Howes?

  But for whatever reason, you got to take all the work you've done with you or it goes somewhere else. All your books, your podcasts, everything you've created for whatever reason that's gone. But you get to leave three lessons behind to that table of people and to the world. What would those three truths be for you?

• 49:11Mark Hyman?

  That's a beautiful question. I think the first one is,

• 49:20Mark Hyman?

  learn how to love yourself and to love others really well. I think it seems like it should be obvious and easy thing to do, but it's not. Most of us have lack of self-worth and self-love. Most of us struggle to fully be present and love others. So I think that's really the core of life. I think the second thing is, don't wait to do what you want to do in life. Just go for it. Whatever brings you joy, find those things and follow them. Because that will not only make you live longer, but actually make your life way better. And the third is, kind of work on understanding the owner's manual for your body.

• 50:03Mark Hyman?

  Because it's the chassis that you carry around with you to be able to do all the rest of it. So you can't love, you can't serve, you can't do all the things you want to do unless you understand how to care for this human frame that we were all gifted, that has the capacity to have ecstatic, extraordinary experiences, but only if we take care of it. If we're in a fog from eating crap and sitting around watching TV and mind-numbingly scrolling on social media, binge watching Netflix, like, we're not going to be living the full human experience. So learn how to elevate your biological software, which is really why I wrote the book, Young Forever, to help people get a roadmap and a very practical step-by-step guide

• 50:47Mark Hyman?

  to activating all of their ancient healing systems, their longevity switches, and being able to have the opportunity to be a contribution to the world.

• 50:56Lewis Howes?

  Mark, appreciate you, my man. Thank you so much. Powerful.

• 51:20Lewis Howes?

  Please share it with a friend over on social media or text a friend. Leave us a review over on Apple Podcasts and let me know what you learned over on our social media channels @louishowes. I really love hearing the feedback from you and it helps us continue to make the show better. And if you want more inspiration from our world-class guests and content to learn how to improve the quality of your life, then make sure to sign up for the Greatness Newsletter and get it delivered right to your inbox over at greatness.com/newsletter. And if no one has told you today, I want to remind you that you are loved, you are worthy, and you matter. And now it's time to go out there and do something great.