The 5 Hidden Layers Blocking You From Receiving Money | Jamie Sea

Jamie Sea, entrepreneur, educator, and author who built an eight-figure company after walking away from two seven-figure businesses, joins Lewis Howes to unpack the Wealth Container framework, the five layers of visibility, loyalty, responsibility, ease, and identity that govern financial growth. The conversation covers nervous system regulation, subconscious rewiring, and Human Design as tools for receiving money without burnout or self-sabotage.

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:02Lewis Howes?

  Everywhere I go, airports, events, walking down the street, people stop me and say, Louis, this show got me through one of the hardest seasons of my life. And it's one of the coolest things when people come up to me. So if you see me, please come up and say hi and let me know how this show, The School of Greatness, has impacted you. It lights me up because our mission at Greatness Media is to impact 100 million lives every single week. So if today's conversation hits home for you, do me a favor and push the follow button right now. It means that the next conversation will be delivered to you and will find you exactly when you need it. Again, thank you so much for being here and listening to The School of Greatness. Make sure to follow right now to stay up to date on the latest and greatest.

• 0:47Lewis Howes?

  Why are women more designed to create abundance in financial terms than men?

• 0:54Speaker 01

  I would say the magic sauce for money. It is this balance of softness and love. The more deeply even men could be in touch with that side of themselves.

• 1:05Lewis Howes?

  They unlock.

• 1:05Speaker 01

  Unbelievable abundance, unbelievable.

• 1:08Lewis Howes?

  She's an educator, an author, and an entrepreneur who, after building two seven-figure businesses, she walked away from all of it and rebuilt her life from scratch. We have the inspiring Jamie C. in the house. What would you say then is blocking people's ability to make more money the most?

• 1:23Speaker 01

  There's five specific layers, visibility, loyalty, responsibility. So when someone shows me a specific behavior, I can look and I can look at their social media. I can look at the way that they're communicating and I know exactly what layer is activated.

• 1:38Lewis Howes?

  What is the thing that is mentally blocking them or emotionally blocking them from creating more financial abundance?

• 1:44Speaker 01

  So think about it this way is when you are.

• 1:53Lewis Howes?

  How do our nervous system and our identity affect our ability to make more money?

• 1:58Speaker 01

  That is a actually very interesting process. I think most people, when they learn about the subconscious mind or learn about growth or the nervous system or identity work, it's in two separate camps. There's the subconscious mind camp, there's the nervous system camp. And I actually see them as one solid experience. The subconscious is everything that's taking in the story. Your identity is built in there, everything that you know about yourself, the way you perceive what you can actually achieve, what you think is possible, how safe it is for you to actually grow, what you believe is holding you back or keeping you where you are. And then the actual nervous system is the thing that's communicating directly with all of those stories

• 2:44Speaker 01

  and all of those perceived limitations. And the nervous system is then going to always be the one that's saying, hey, you're getting too close to where we are unfamiliar and we're going to pump the brakes.

• 2:55Lewis Howes?

  Even if it's more money, what people want?

• 2:58Speaker 01

  And that is the interesting thing because you would say consciously, I desire all of this growth. I want the bigger business or I want to feel more confident. And the body is putting all of the brakes because it doesn't know how to actually familiarize itself there. And it shows up as the procrastination or hyper hustle or even this process of, you know, overthinking or feeling a lot more fear or a lot more doubt. All of the sensations that you're feeling in the body is direct communication and information from the subconscious mind about your identity.

• 3:33Lewis Howes?

  So what would you say then is blocking people's ability to make more money the most?

• 3:38Speaker 01

  I would say the ability to receive. Because when we think about making money, there's so many ways, right? You, you can learn how to scale a business, you can learn how to launch a product, you can learn all of the ways to run ads or, you know, familiarize yourself with social media marketing. But the moment you actually have to sell or believe in yourself or communicate or be able to actually have conviction in what you have to offer, that is actually a receiving process more than it is a making money process.

• 4:10Lewis Howes?

  So if someone hasn't learned how to receive more money, more abundance, more wealth, what is the process actually learning how to feel safe to make more money and receive it and not feel overwhelmed or like they're going to sabotage it?

• 4:27Speaker 01

  An easy way to even familiarize yourself with receiving and what your relationship is with receiving is how do you receive a compliment? If someone is saying, oh my gosh, I love your shirt or I love your hair. Do you say, oh my gosh, I got it off the dollar rack or I haven't washed my hair in, in, you know, five days? Or, oh my gosh, this? No, it's this deflecting, it's minimizing, it's pushing away. It's this unconscious process where you just don't feel okay being witnessed, being chosen, being seen, being celebrated and being okay with someone paying attention to you.

• 5:04Lewis Howes?

  Why is receiving a compliment so hard for so many people then?

• 5:07Speaker 01

  We have been raised to be more digestible, to be the one who doesn't talk too loud, the one who is, you know, use your manners, stay this way, do this. When you are in the process of making more money or selling or expanding yourself in any capacity, doesn't even have to be with just money, you have to recognize that the way that you are able to stand in your bigness and stand in your greatness and stand in your ability to shine is something that is most likely learned and has to be learned over time. The majority of people have been taught to minimize because standing out could be this process of rejection

• 5:53Speaker 01

  and how your body receives rejection. It could be pointing the finger, you're so, you're too much, you know, quiet down. Don't say, don't say that too loudly. And being able to receive that could almost be the ability of saying, oh, they might think that I am cocky or they might think that I'm too much or full of myself. When really it's just, thank you.

• 6:17Lewis Howes?

  So how can someone learn to receive all the celebration, all the praise, all the abundance, all the opportunities for growth in success or money or whatever it might be, while also staying a good person and not being an egomaniac or a narcissist?

• 6:33Speaker 01

  It starts with your relationship of how you speak to yourself. Because when you achieve something, can you look in the mirror and say, I'm proud of you? You did such a great job. Or when you make a mistake, can you say, it's okay, I'm all right. It's okay to make mistakes, it's okay to be a beginner at something. It's okay not to thrive immediately. And can you witness yourself? Can you see yourself? Can you receive love from yourself, acceptance, praise? Everything that you are really feeling uncomfortable receiving from others has to be something that you have to start with within yourself. And that is a birthright to honor yourself and to be okay with receiving love from yourself.

• 7:16Speaker 01

  And if anything, I would say that that's the actual differing process between someone who is an egomaniac. Because when you honor who you are and you say kind things to yourself, it just makes you, I would say, a more gentle person to even be with.

• 7:35Lewis Howes?

  Both of us went down a path early in our business careers where we are driven to make more and hustle harder and do whatever it takes and stay up all night and just figure out ways to earn more in our business. And it leads to burnout when you live that way. And it also leads to a sense of like scarcity. It's like, okay, I'm doing more, but what's the purpose, right? How does someone learn how to earn more with less stress, with less scarcity? And be able to receive it and feel they're deserving and worthy of it? You could be like, oh my God, I just made all this money and you really can blow it up in your mind. So how do we learn to do this? So it's just, yeah, of course, this money comes, it goes, it's okay, either way.

• 8:21Speaker 01

  With the process of deeply understanding your purpose and why you're doing things, it has to be rooted in a why. And most people, I'll actually sit with them and I say, why do you want to make the money? Why do you want to do these things? And sometimes they'll say, I want to prove it to myself that I can. Or I want to just have the, I want to have all of these other things. And while there's nothing wrong with having all of the incredible, you know, a beautiful home or the accolades or all of the things to prove to yourself that you can, there has to be something deeper besides what you're achieving. And if it's only the money, if it's only the praise, if it's only the likes, if it's only the opportunities, that is always going to be fleeting.

• 9:05Speaker 01

  Because we are creating a felt sense of, I'm okay when the money comes in. I'm okay when I'm praised. I'm okay only when someone else validates me, when I get a like or when I get a follow or when I reach this new goal. And that's why most people, when they slow down, end up feeling the sense of anxiety, never enough itis, I have to reach the next goal. They reach the goal, they keep moving and then they can't ever slow down is because they aren't actually creating safety within their own body and their own nervous system. And it has to be the other way around versus everything outside of me creates my safety

• 9:47Speaker 01

  and my okayness and my enoughness versus I am okay, I am enough, I am good. And I create from that space and everything else is just a byproduct of how, how I see myself.

• 10:00Lewis Howes?

  I can see people, you know, watching or listening saying, well, but if I'm broke, I'm not okay. I'm living in scarcity, so I don't feel okay. So how do I start to feel okay inside of me when I'm month to month? You know, I've got all these responsibilities, I'm barely sleeping, I'm working a couple of jobs and I'm in debt, I made some bad decisions from the past or I took these student loans out and I wish I didn't, whatever it might be. How does someone feel safety within themselves when they have no certainty outside of them?

• 10:29Speaker 01

  As someone who was broke the majority of my life, I understand this on every cellular structure of my body. I get it. I would say that the first thing is compassion with yourself, patience with yourself and understanding that it's okay that it feels hard right now. It's okay that you don't have certainty right now. And the next thing to kind of anchor into even more deeply is. Where is there already abundance within me? Where is there already abundance available? Because when we are in a state of survival, when we are in a state of fight or flight, when we are in a state of I am not okay because I don't have enough in the bank account, which is a very valid reason.

• 11:12Speaker 01

  I'll never invalidate anyone for feeling that. Very, very, very, very real and a deeply emotional experience. However, when we actually take just a moment each day and prioritize what is already here for me? Can I, can I turn on the faucet? Is there water? Can I go and look at the trees? And can I see how many leaves? How many blades of grass? How many people there are? Can I sit and look at my child in the eyes and notice how much magic is here? Can I open the fridge and have an apple? Where is there already abundance that's here that you can anchor into? Because we cannot create clarity and solid momentum and movement

• 11:56Speaker 01

  when we are in the survival part of the brain. So if you can even just take a moment just to, even if it's not the life you want to live right now, even if you're not at all where you want to be, finding it on purpose in small incremental moments so that your body can relax, so your body can feel calm. And then you can take action and take momentum and movement, and it will be so much more powerful that way.

• 12:20Lewis Howes?

  You mostly work with a lot of women, correct?

• 12:22Speaker 01

  About ninety-five percent are women.

• 12:24Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, I'm curious, from your perspective, why are women more designed to create abundance in financial terms than men in your mind?

• 12:34Speaker 01

  I would say that women have an ability to experience such a maternal aspect of caretaking and such a deep understanding of there's so much that we have innately built within us that is soft, that is gentle. And we have a really beautiful balance of the masculine and the feminine energy. So we can really deeply hold space for ourselves and hold space for others, which is really the, I would say, the, the magic sauce for money. It is this balance of softness and love and caretaking.

• 13:17Speaker 01

  And then there's this structure and there's this, these boundaries that we can put in and the mixture together. I'm not saying that that's not available to men at all. But I think that men have, I mean, all of us have been built in to the patriarchal aspect of our society. And I would say that the more deeply even men could be in touch with that side of themselves.

• 13:41Lewis Howes?

  They unlock.

• 13:42Speaker 01

  Unbelievable abundance, unbelievable. And I see it even with the five percent of men that I do work with. The second they are able to actually tap into that and feel and pause and not force or push or compete their way to the thing or be the best at everything. But to really understand that I can be the best within myself and I can be the best within what I teach and what I do, and there's so much space for all of us.

• 14:08Lewis Howes?

  I kind of went through my own ego death at the end of my twenties and started my healing journey around thirty as well. And it was right before I launched this show, School of Greatness, over thirteen years ago. And I remember saying, the next thing I do is not going to be about me, it's going to be about we. It's going to be about others and pointing the spotlight on everyone else rather than look at me. And I'm not saying we shouldn't be putting content out there about ourselves, but that's what I needed to do at that time. Which is like, I need to make this about everyone else and about collaboration, not competition. And I think when, when everyone can think from a space of collaboration over competition, everyone rises at that moment. And I'm curious then, with all the women you work with and coach,

• 14:52Lewis Howes?

  what is the biggest money barrier that they have? That's blocking them from financial abundance? And what is the, the number one thing that when they start implementing it, money just starts to flow?

• 15:08Speaker 01

  There's multiple layers of this. The way that I actually work with this within my clients is I think about this as the wealth container. So this is the nervous system subconscious experience of what does my body feel safe enough to hold and expand and receive? And there's five specific layers, visibility, loyalty, responsibility. And we have ease and identity. And when we look through these specific layers, they show up very specifically. So when someone shows me a specific behavior, I can look and I can look at their social media. I can look at the way that they're communicating and I know exactly what layer is activated.

• 15:50Speaker 01

  And I would say the majority of them fall between two of them, which is responsibility and loyalty. Responsibility is especially for those at a younger age who held a lot more responsibility. They have become the hyper-independent ones, the hyper-vigilant ones, the women who will feel like they have to do everything themselves. And you get to a place and you know this just as well as anyone else who, who runs a business, that you can't do it all alone.

• 16:19Lewis Howes?

  No.

• 16:20Speaker 01

  You can't do it alone. So you'll see them with the inability to outsource or trust others. They will drive themselves into hours and hours and hours when they honestly could create so much spaciousness if they just focused on the things that they actually truly thrived in. All of their life force energy would come back and they'd be massively powerful. I mean, just the amount of magnetism that would pour from them would be unbelievable if they just allowed support in. That's the receiving aspect as well, support in there. And then the second one would be the loyalty, which is, I mean, on a biological level, we all want to belong. We don't want to be othered, we don't want to look different, we don't want to be pointed at or laughed at or ostracized.

• 17:03Speaker 01

  And it's the moment when we recognize that if you are an entrepreneur,

• 17:10Speaker 01

  you are going to face all of the parts of yourself that need to be witnessed. And one of the biggest things is the fear of outgrowing the people that raised them.

• 17:21Lewis Howes?

  Oh, I know that one.

• 17:24Speaker 01

  Looking different than the people that raised you, even though.

• 17:27Lewis Howes?

  Your friends, your community, your family, whatever it might be, right?

• 17:30Speaker 01

  Being different and being othered is unconsciously one of the biggest ones, I will say, in, in the people that I work with. And that shows up very specifically, actually just had a client that experienced this massive success. She's making multi-six figures every month. She's loves now being able to have some of the things that she's always wanted, the beautiful bags and the things that she values, right? Having these luxury items and she goes and she walks into her house and she has this beautiful bag that she's earned.

• 18:01Lewis Howes?

  Proud of, yeah, yeah.

• 18:01Speaker 01

  She's proud of it. And her, her mother says to her, oh, I, I don't even know what, you know, your birthday is coming up, but I don't even know what to get you anymore. Like, I don't even know who you are, like, you have these expensive things. And she reached out to me, she says, every cell of my body just broke. Like, I just felt like I should hand my bag over to her because who am I to be able to have more than my mother when she worked so hard? She provided for me, she gave me everything and here I am having so much more than her. And she doesn't even know how to identify with this version of me. And I immediately just said, that statement does not make you less loved. It does not make you less important. It does not make you anything other than just a person who cares. And it's okay that you feel that way.

• 18:46Speaker 01

  But I would say that those are the two layers of the wealth container that are consistently activated.

• 18:50Lewis Howes?

  So the wealth container, the five layers, just so I remember, visibility, loyalty, responsibility? What were the other two?

• 18:57Speaker 01

  Ease and identity.

• 18:59Lewis Howes?

  Ease?

• 19:00Speaker 01

  Ease is, is that one, woof, that one comes in hot though. Because that will show up as making everything much more difficult. Because if I didn't, if I didn't work so hard for it, if I didn't bleed myself dry for it, did I even deserve it? And I know that this actually was a big thing that I navigated to. I remember when I was getting a lot of success in my first two companies, I remember going to a family, this was like the loyalty and the ease layer coming up hot in this conversation. And I, I, I go to a family picnic, I hadn't seen people in a while. And there was some family members that walked up to me, they're like, Jamie, I've been watching you online. You're doing such incredible things.

• 19:43Speaker 01

  I could feel everything like, oh my gosh, I didn't even know people were watching. I was just here serving my clients, I didn't know you saw everything. And it became glaringly obvious that I was massively uncomfortable in that moment. Every cell was like pushed away.

• 19:57Lewis Howes?

  Why were you uncomfortable?

• 19:57Speaker 01

  Because I didn't know how to receive someone else witnessing me that I didn't know was seeing me, someone who's in my family. I didn't know how to just accept that someone saw, my goodness, and that I was doing well. And I just said, oh yeah, yeah, no, it's not that big of a deal. It's not that big of a deal. And also, I'm just, I'm working so hard for it.

• 20:17Lewis Howes?

  Wow, interesting.

• 20:17Speaker 01

  It was, it was the deflecting, it was the pushing away.

• 20:20Lewis Howes?

  And you're the coach of these things.

• 20:21Speaker 01

  And the justification. Yeah, this was in, this was my first business when things started to.

• 20:26Lewis Howes?

  Okay, so before you started to get into this.

• 20:27Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah. Now I'm just like, thank you.

• 20:29Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, got you.

• 20:31Speaker 01

  But it was this deflecting, this pushing away and almost like I had to show this badge of honor that I had worked so hard and that I deserved it so that you didn't think that I was this person who just had it easy.

• 20:43Lewis Howes?

  Interesting, so you're almost like, yeah, but I'm not, you know, I'm traveling non-stop, I get no sleep, I don't see my family, you have to like justify the success in some ways to feel like, oh, but your life is actually just as good or not better because you have these other things, you get whatever it might be, you know?

• 20:59Speaker 01

  Well, yeah, because if you think about it, if we've always been told, I mean, from early childhood, you have to work hard if you're going to get what you want, if you're going to make money, you have to work hard. And I don't ever think that hard work is out of the question. I think it's the energy that you put behind that. Because I call them sprint seasons because you're going to have seasons where you're in a building phase. You're going to have to put in more effort, you're going to have to, it's the energy you're putting behind that. If the, the effort is fueled with scarcity and fear and needing to be accepted, it's going to drain all of your energy and it's going to lead to burnout. But if the intentional work that you're putting into your business is fueled with belief

• 21:38Speaker 01

  and expansion and hope and desire and healing and just wanting to deeply serve in some capacity and be able to have a life that you've always dreamt of, that energy is much different. You're much more well-resourced energetically.

• 21:52Lewis Howes?

  So break this down for me energetically. Someone watching or listening is like, I've got this project or this idea or this launch or this thing that I really want to put out there. And I've either been working on it or I'm planning to start it right now and hopefully launch it in the next couple of months. Whatever it might be, this new journey of this side project or this business or something. And one of them is like, I'm broke. I don't have anything. This has to work out or I'm screwed. And they're coming from a place of scarcity or need. The other one is, I'm broke, but I'm creating this from a place of expansion and abundance. I hope it works out. I'm going to give it my all.

• 22:31Lewis Howes?

  And I'm going to bring my unique gifts, my joy, my love, my, my, my excitement, every single moment to this, no matter what the result is. What is the difference between those two individuals energetically over the next few months if they consistently do those same things?

• 22:48Speaker 01

  The person that you mentioned first, the one who is saying this has to work. The one thing I will say is they're most likely in a process of outsourcing all of their trust to someone else. They're in a process of outsourcing everything on something outside of themselves. So what I mean by this is that when people are in this process of it needs to work, they're usually very strategy heavy. They're very much in the process of asking everyone else's opinion. They're probably over consuming everything on social media, implementing every, every strategy. Maybe even having someone say, this is the strategy you should do to be successful, but maybe it's not.

• 23:32Speaker 01

  That feels good to them and they haven't learned what actually feels good to them because a strategy can only work. If it works for you, if it feels good for you, because there's millions of strategies and they generally will work if the energies consistent behind it. And if this person was to continue this way, they're most likely going to feel a lot of self doubt along the way. Even if it does work, it'll probably be a place where they have a difficult time receiving it. The fear of it, the other shoe dropping of now that I have it, I have to keep going. Otherwise, everything will fall apart.

• 24:10Speaker 01

  Because if you come from the energy of I'm broke, I'm, everything is, everything is scarce, everything I have to work so, so hard to get there. That energy doesn't go away immediately when something comes to you. It doesn't. It brings, it highlights it and it gets even bigger. And that's why so many entrepreneurs burn themselves out is because they're operating from the mentality of somebody who had to make it work. And they've never adapted to this person who can trust themselves. They've never actually proof stacked that they've always figured it out. They've always been okay, even if it wasn't the ideal outcome. Energetically for the second person.

• 24:47Lewis Howes?

  Who's coming from a place of.

• 24:48Speaker 01

  Of abundance. There's going to be deep resilience there. There's going to be compassion. There's going to be a neutrality around the outcome. Because when somebody is saying, I'm doing this for, it's a, whatever outcome I get is okay. Because it is, everything is neutral. We assign the meaning. And so if we get this outcome and we are assigning this as that's what makes me okay. It's going to filter through everything in your nervous system, everything in your body, everything in your mind about what does that mean about me? So when now it's neutral and I can see it as neutral, it didn't maybe have the outcome. It didn't get the launch exactly the way that I thought.

• 25:30Speaker 01

  Amazing. What, that's okay. I tried. What data can I look at this objectively and see? This worked, this didn't work. Where did it feel forced? Where did it not feel good? And how can I get up and try again? There's resiliency built there because it's not filtered through. If I do this and I don't get it, I'm not enough. I'm not okay. There's something wrong with me. And the person who is more abundantly thinking is the one that's going to have the resilience and neutrality around. Get up, try again.

• 26:05Lewis Howes?

  How does someone learn how to set a goal, set an intention, it not come true and still feel like they're enough?

• 26:13Speaker 01

  When you set a goal and it doesn't come true. What was the actual purpose of reaching it? What were, what was the internal state you were hoping it would give you? What pressure were you putting on yourself for that specific goal? So if it doesn't come true. What were you actually hoping to feel with that? Were you hoping to feel more successful? Were you hoping to feel more excited further along? What was the emotional state that you were putting on that outcome? And the way to feel enough is to ensure that you are giving yourself that emotional state regardless of the outcome. So example of that would be if I was to have a launch and I wanted to make X amount of money.

• 26:58Speaker 01

  And it didn't come true. And I asked myself, what was I hoping that launch would make me feel?

• 27:05Speaker 01

  It would make me feel that I'm enough, I'm, I'm valuable, that people want what I have. That I feel calm, that I feel relaxed, that I feel successful, that I feel more confident. Okay. So I'm placing all of that on something out there. Now, if I want to feel okay with any outcome, how can I give all of that to myself? How can I tell myself that I'm proud of myself? How can I give more deep compassion? How can I find more joy in the things that I'm doing outside of just business? How can I have more fun? How can I play? How can I be deeply present with the people in my life?

• 27:43Speaker 01

  How can I have compassion for where I am right now and know that the whole point of entrepreneurship, the whole point of life is the enjoyment of the journey? It's not just, once I get somewhere, I'll feel okay. It's how can I feel okay with every part of this? Because we all know this to be true, is that who you are in your first year of business is not who you are in the second. And who you are in the third and 10 years down the line, right? The show maybe didn't feel the exact way when the first episode versus 13 years down the line. And it's really just being able to be present of what am I desiring that is outside of myself?

• 28:23Speaker 01

  And how can I be so intentional on finding that now? Cause it does exist in some capacity. We just are placing so much of it outside of ourselves.

• 28:31Lewis Howes?

  Bringing it back inside for sure.

• 28:33Speaker 01

  It's always an inside job.

• 28:34Lewis Howes?

  When someone feels a sense of shame around money, how does that block their ability to receive more?

• 28:42Speaker 01

  I think there's layers there and it's individual to each person of, you know, was this shame because of the potential mistakes that you think you made with, I see this with the stories around debt, the stories around. You know, people who had to take out a credit card or, you know, do the loans and they're paying things off. And there's a lot of embarrassment of thinking, I should have made a better decision or an investment in a, in a coach or in an opportunity and it didn't come through. And there's shame because I, I should have gotten it right. I should have known better. When you did the best you could with the knowledge that you had at the time. And I would also say that there's sometimes layers of shame around.

• 29:23Speaker 01

  People who were raised by people who struggled, who maybe thought of money a certain way. You know, we're constantly getting feedback and data every moment of every day, especially in our childhood. And it shows up as, you know, your parents fighting about money. The subtle bill has to be paid and the huff and the puff or the fight that's happening and you have to close the door to not hear it. Or the, we can't afford it, or that's too expensive, or who does that person think they are? And you create this internalized experience of whatever you associate, the people that are, are raising me.

• 30:05Speaker 01

  Associate with those people, that thing. And then you desire it later on in life. There's a mix of emotion there. I want to be successful. I desire because I have a big dream and I have a big goal, but I also am really deeply embarrassed to want something that I was maybe raised to believe was bad.

• 30:27Lewis Howes?

  Did you have that growing up?

• 30:28Speaker 01

  I did, although I'm always very careful about anything that I say about my, my upbringing, mainly because with my parents, they really did the best they could. My father was, you know, the caretaker for a lot of, you know, he has a lot of, a lot of siblings. And he did the best he could and he was raised on the, you work hard and he was at work all the time. And my mother, uh, you know, she worked really, really, really, really hard as well. And it was, uh, I think a lack of awareness, a lack of knowledge, a lack of understanding.

• 31:09Speaker 01

  And you just take the story in and it's, you, you, you choose at some point to recognize that is the story mine? Or is it someone else's? And do I want to believe that story anymore? But it was definitely kind of an imprint of believing that people that were wealthy were bad, bad people. Even to this day, my father will even say, I don't understand how you have success and you don't scam people.

• 31:35Lewis Howes?

  Oh my gosh.

• 31:36Speaker 01

  Or I don't understand how you are so giving or why you donate so much or why you give back to people so much.

• 31:43Lewis Howes?

  Most wealthy people are greedy. They're takers.

• 31:45Speaker 01

  The story that he has and he still can't understand it. And he, and I said, you know, dad, I, I think that both can be true. I think there can be good people. And I think there can be good people with money and there can be good people without money. And there can be people that don't have the highest value system with money, without money. But the one thing that I will always say to him is that money is a, is neutral. And when someone receives it, it only highlights their value system. So if you're a good person and you don't have a lot of resources, you likely will donate your time. You will be there for other people. And then when you actually have more resources, you can help even more.

• 32:25Speaker 01

  And that's the value system I operate on. And I think that's the value system he always operated on as well. And he just never saw it as like, oh, you can be, you can be a multi eight figure founder and also be the kindest, loving, generous human, like they can live together. So it was a very much a disbelief process for him.

• 32:50Lewis Howes?

  For women who have been working really hard for maybe 10 plus years, who are finally starting to break free financially. They're getting to that six figure, multiple six figure, multiple seven figure mark in their business. But they're feeling burnt out and exhausted. What type of wisdom do you share with those individuals?

• 33:10Speaker 01

  This is the work that I do with a lot of my high level clients and it's the most beautiful work. And I'm so beyond grateful to be able to, to see them grow and to see them with this because a lot of them.

• 33:25Speaker 01

  Are experiencing so much growth and so much expansion all at once. And the wisdom that I will always share with them is through the lens of three things, which is the subconscious, the nervous system, and then also human design. Human design really takes in a lot of the way that your energy naturally flows, the, the way that you decide, the way that you move. And a lot of times, what ends up happening is we create this idea of, this is how you are meant to grow. This is how you are meant to build a business. This is how you are supposed to do it. Even if I hurt myself along the way, even if my body's exhausted along the way,

• 34:06Speaker 01

  this is, this is what it takes in the pursuit of greatness to reach my goals. And when I actually audit the way that their design is, they've been going against the way that their energy actually moves the entire time. I'll give you an example. So some people listening right now might actually be familiar with, with human design. But one of the most incredible things that you could ever learn is just the way that you are actually meant to have your energy move in your business. Because some of my clients are, they're generator types. And so if you're not familiar with this is, this is the, the type of people who are meant to only say yes and only do the things in their business that are a full body yes.

• 34:50Speaker 01

  And it always comes from the sacral, which is in the gut. So it's either a move forward or a move back. And most entrepreneurs are making decisions from the neck up. They're running their business from the neck up and no one is actually meant to make a decision from the brain. And each of us are designed so beautifully and uniquely to decide to move, to create. And you reserve so much more life force energy and you cannot possibly burn out when you actually implement those, those three things with the subconscious, the nervous system and human design. So one of my clients is a generator type, sacral, hell yes, hell no. It's the, the best advice I was ever given is if it's not a hell yes, it is a hell no. There's no hell maybe.

• 35:33Speaker 01

  And she had had colitis her whole life, stomach issues her whole life. Within four months of working with me, gone.

• 35:42Lewis Howes?

  Wow.

• 35:42Speaker 01

  Because her body was fighting her the whole way. And she was now creating from, do I actually want to do this? Do I want to do that? And her body would say yes, or it would say no. And everything she said yes, her magnetism was unbelievable. The amount of clients that would come in, the amount of, she's like, my videos are getting millions of, millions of reach and that never happened before. And the one thing that truly helps women, honestly, anyone at that level of, of growth, immense growth is understanding how your body works. Because at that point, it's not a strategy game. It's, it's an internal expansion game. It's always, it's always that.

• 36:25Speaker 01

  And you ask anyone who's, who's massively successful that, yes, there's strategy involved, but it's really only running 5% of your business. Everything else is you.

• 36:35Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 36:35Speaker 01

  Everything else is you.

• 36:36Lewis Howes?

  Wow. Interesting. What would you say then is the biggest block for most of the women that watch your content? That go through your training, your coaching? What is the thing that is mentally blocking them? Or emotionally blocking them from creating more financial abundance?

• 36:52Speaker 01

  Visibility.

• 36:53Lewis Howes?

  What does that mean?

• 36:54Speaker 01

  So you think about it this way is when you are, when you are marketing, just in general. Okay. So you have a business. Now you gotta go and create the content.

• 37:04Lewis Howes?

  Put yourself out there. Yeah.

• 37:06Speaker 01

  You gotta put yourself out there.

• 37:07Lewis Howes?

  What if no one likes it? What if no one comments? What if no one buys?

• 37:10Speaker 01

  How do I feel with me being me? Am I even me?

• 37:16Lewis Howes?

  Am I good enough?

• 37:17Speaker 01

  There's a performative energy that also happens. I'll see them behind the scenes and they're funny and they're chill and they're relaxed and they're quirky and they're like, just so funny. And then all of a sudden they put the camera up and they're like, this performative voice and like, no.

• 37:33Lewis Howes?

  20 takes, yeah, trying to make it perfect.

• 37:36Speaker 01

  There has to be the script. I have to, I have to follow the rules. I have to do this thing for it to work. And you find that the ones that truly honor what it takes to be seen and to honor all of the emotional experiences that come with that. Because how can you support yourself? If someone says something about you? If someone doesn't like what you do? If someone doesn't like how you look? If they don't, if you say something that is, goes against the grain, that someone doesn't believe in? If somebody, you know, says, I don't actually believe you. I don't think you're doing great. How can you hold that energy within your own body and say, I know who I am. I know what I believe.

• 38:22Speaker 01

  That's the internal work. Because the more you can do that, the more you can support yourself with just that alone. Like no matter what anyone says, if it hurts me, if it, if it affects my body on some level, there's a part of me that's, that might believe that's true. And that's the work.

• 38:43Lewis Howes?

  What if it is true?

• 38:44Speaker 01

  If it is true, like how can I honor that? How can I? And it's usually wherever there's that raw energy of like, oh, that freaking hurt. Oh, that was a gut punch, right? Or if someone says something that you are deeply insecure about your whole life and they say something about it. You're gonna not show up in your power. You're gonna not, you're gonna, you're gonna hold back. You're going to want to hide in some capacity. And I would say the majority of people are hiding on some level. Whether they think they are or not, they'll, they'll be like, okay, I'm doing the three posts today. I'm doing the things, but they're hiding.

• 39:20Lewis Howes?

  They're not truly revealing themselves, right?

• 39:22Speaker 01

  Showing up.

• 39:22Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 39:23Speaker 01

  And the second they do, it's profound.

• 39:26Lewis Howes?

  I've seen you grow over the last couple of years. I think I told you beforehand that I like, I started seeing your content when you're, you know, we're kind of starting out, maybe it looked like you were starting out, but. And I was like, this person's on to something and you're gonna be massive. That's what I saw a couple of years ago. If you keep being authentic, the way you were being, which you have been. With the growth that you've had and the greater financial success that you've had, what has been the thing that scared you the most?

• 39:52Speaker 01

  Visibility.

• 39:53Lewis Howes?

  Really?

• 39:54Speaker 01

  Yeah. With visibility, it is the ability to be able to be okay with you standing in your power. Because the more you actually believe in something, the more you say it with your whole chest. You're like, this is what I stand for. This is what I believe in. The more it is going to activate something in someone else and they're gonna say what they believe. And it's recognizing also that everything that's coming out here, I'm, I'm a mirror to other people. So if I say something fully authentic, if I say something very brave or very bold, or something that's very honest, right? And something that I truly believe and it goes against everything that they've ever thought.

• 40:36Speaker 01

  It's going to activate something in them and they will project. They will share with me what they believe. So I am a mirror to them and what they say to me is whatever they believe about themselves.

• 40:49Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 40:50Speaker 01

  I actually taught my oldest daughter this because she is gonna be 13 in October. And some of her friends have social media. She does not. And I did this actual, I'm not sure if you saw it. I posted it a while back, but it was a social media prep school. So I took people behind the scenes. I don't show my children's identity on, on the internet. And so she, it was just her voice, but I was teaching her how to understand her mind and how to understand her body and how to understand comments and how to be very secure in who she is. So that when she shows up, she's not deeply affected by the comments of other people. And she understands what projection is.

• 41:35Speaker 01

  She understands if it hurts, there's something I believe about that to be true. And then she knows how to actually work through it. She understands everything in the nervous system. She understands the layers of the wealth container. She understands how her mind works. And that is something that I am very, very intentional about is honoring the knowledge I have and passing it on to her and to my youngest when, when she's ready. And being able to prepare her to have a safer environment within her own body. Because it's only going to get louder.

• 42:08Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 42:09Speaker 01

  With social.

• 42:13Lewis Howes?

  What's the thing you've said online that has the biggest trigger around money?

• 42:19Speaker 01

  That it could be easy.

• 42:20Lewis Howes?

  Easy to make, easy to spend for a lot of people, but.

• 42:23Speaker 01

  Easy to spend, easy to make.

• 42:24Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 42:25Speaker 01

  It could be easy to make because we've been taught to trust all of the strategies and it's, I always say that the the business world with how to grow and make money is really loud. There's so much noise. Do it this way, this kind of marketing is dead. Don't do it this way. This funnel is dead. Don't do it this way. If you're doing it this way, you're doing it wrong. This person and it's, it's massive chaos and it's massively dysregulating to the body. And you don't know what to listen to and you don't know what to do because you don't know what works for you.

• 43:00Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 43:01Speaker 01

  And if you, and I also see this with the strategy hopping, right? People are like, oh, okay. Strategy, I'm going to do this one and then, and then, oh, it didn't work. But what I find is that strategy is actually a experience for people to feel temporary nervous system regulation. And what I mean by that is strategy feels safe. If I could just follow the rules, if I could just do it this way, then I'll get this result. But they don't even, they don't even give it enough time to work.

• 43:30Lewis Howes?

  Cause if it's not.

• 43:30Speaker 01

  Because if it doesn't work immediately, then.

• 43:33Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 43:34Speaker 01

  And then they move and then they jump and then they jump. And when you actually understand your design, you understand what feels good for you. What marketing comes natural to you, what you actually want to create. Maybe you just want to be on Substack. Maybe you love podcasting. Maybe you love YouTube. Maybe you love interviewing. Maybe you love poetry. Maybe you love, you know, just picking your phone up in the car and doing these car talks, right? And if you have all of this noise, that that's potentially wrong. You're never going to find the thing that actually works for you. And once you truly understand how to receive and bring safety in the body and know how you're designed and know your superpowers.

• 44:17Speaker 01

  The natural byproduct of that is abundance in every capacity. Whether that's money, whether that's opportunity, it is always going to be the natural byproduct of all of that.

• 44:30Lewis Howes?

  The two strategies for you then, the tactical strategy that you're using right now that is working and the internal strategy or internal way of being that shows up most effective when you implement a launch, trying to market your business. What are those two things?

• 44:48Speaker 01

  From a strategic standpoint, something that's always been very natural for me is picking up my phone and just saying what I want to say. I'm not a script person. I cannot do it like my brain just goes offline. And a lot of the times when I'm actually talking, I just have this little download. It's like, this is the topic that I want to talk about.

• 45:08Lewis Howes?

  And you just riff.

• 45:09Speaker 01

  And I riff.

• 45:10Lewis Howes?

  Wow.

• 45:11Speaker 01

  The one thing that I will say I'm very intentional about, and it's the way that my brain has kind of always functioned. However, I've kind of mapped to how it functions and then taught it to people so that they can be intentional about that. Which is I never make content just to make content. I think about where I want someone to go first, whether that's to a resource, whether that's to a video that I want them to watch, whether that's a workshop that I'm teaching, whether that's an invitation to have a DM conversation. I'm always thinking about where do I want them to go first? What is the thing that is actually going to make that be inevitable next step? And then I riff to that point.

• 45:52Lewis Howes?

  So you know where to send people at the end, essentially.

• 45:54Speaker 01

  Yeah, cause a lot of times people are like, oh, I'll just talk about these three things. But it doesn't make sense. And then they're like, uh, what do I do now?

• 46:03Speaker 01

  Where do my, but it, it's actually a reverse engineering process. And then the internal state, I will say is that from my human design, I'm a human design projector, which means I think in systems, I see problems, I see things that people don't see within themselves very, very easily. And I see patterns. I'm actually, uh, part of my design is pattern recognition. So I can see a pattern a mile away, like years before it's even going to happen. And I can see a pattern in the way that people communicate and the way people talk. And I know what the issue is. And then that's, that's why my clients are able to get, you know, where they are because it's very easy for me to do that. So that's always the energy that I actually lean into is what is the problem that I'm seeing?

• 46:49Speaker 01

  And that is enough. That is enough. That is the internal state of just find

• 46:56Speaker 01

  the problem, the pattern, give them the solution. And that is enough. I have always been a blinders up girl.

• 47:04Lewis Howes?

  What does that mean?

• 47:05Speaker 01

  So I will never look at what anyone else is doing.

• 47:09Lewis Howes?

  You stay in your lane.

• 47:10Speaker 01

  I never do.

• 47:11Lewis Howes?

  That's good.

• 47:12Speaker 01

  People will be like, oh, have you watched this? It's like, nope.

• 47:15Lewis Howes?

  That's good. You focus on your vision, what you're up to.

• 47:18Speaker 01

  It's this.

• 47:18Lewis Howes?

  That's smart.

• 47:19Speaker 01

  I don't, I'm not scrolling. I'm not, nope. I just know how deeply affects the nervous system and how safe your internal environment has to be. Because whatever you are absorbing through conversation, through social media, through what you're listening to, through the environments you're in is imprinting as truth somewhere.

• 47:39Lewis Howes?

  Wow, that's interesting.

• 47:41Speaker 01

  You'd be very surprised with the amount of people that I talk to that are over consuming.

• 47:45Lewis Howes?

  Really?

• 47:45Speaker 01

  Just this.

• 47:47Lewis Howes?

  And then they're just comparing to everyone else or what are they doing?

• 47:49Speaker 01

  They lose sight of who they are.

• 47:50Lewis Howes?

  Interesting.

• 47:51Speaker 01

  It's just this rule book that they're trying to follow. A very confusing one at that. You know, cause you think about all the, the, the marketing rules and all the, you should do it this way. And then you build up this kind of idea of who am I?

• 48:05Speaker 01

  Do I have to be that person to be successful? How do I have to shape shift my way there?

• 48:09Lewis Howes?

  Cause they'll see someone else getting results and say, oh, I have to do it like this person or like that person. And I have to try this thing.

• 48:14Speaker 01

  Yeah. But the reason it works for that person is maybe because that's what feels natural to them. They have a very regulated understanding of like, this is the actual thing that I love to talk about. And this is the way that I love doing things. And this is, you know, how I support people and it feels good for them. And you can't, you can't take someone else's process, their nervous system, their whole life experience and expect it just to be something you can immediately step into and get that result. And also you just get to enjoy your own experience.

• 48:48Lewis Howes?

  Exactly.

• 48:49Speaker 01

  Like it gets to be your way. I always say to my clients, your way is the way. Your way is the way. Every time they're like, there's a rule, uh, your way is the way.

• 48:58Lewis Howes?

  Your way is the way. So how can someone know then if they're going against their way that they're meant to make more money?

• 49:04Speaker 01

  If there is resistance, if there is overthinking, if there is a process where you are actually on some level, you know, it doesn't feel right. If you were to really sit and be honest, you could say, I'm doing that because I feel like I have to. Versus I want to. That will always, where is there a should energy? Where is there, I have to, where is there, I need to do it this way? And I said, who, who told you? Who told you that you had to? What, why do you want to do it? Which way makes your journey so much more fun? And if they're going against their way, their body will tell them at some point.

• 49:44Lewis Howes?

  Yes.

• 49:45Speaker 01

  It, it will, it'll, it'll show up with either feeling like you have to hyper control everything, that you're procrastinating, that you're overthinking, that you are in a constant people pleasing, you know, fawn response where it's just what everyone else wants. What everyone else wants, then I'll just do that. Whatever, whatever product I think that this person wants, I see this all the time. Their audience is like, oh my gosh, would you just create this workshop? And then they do it and no one buys it.

• 50:12Lewis Howes?

  Why is that?

• 50:13Speaker 01

  Because they're not convicted in it. It's not what they actually want to do. And we are energetic beings. We're reading energy all day long. We're reading, you know, subtle, subtle cues in the body. We're reading energy. We feel things when we move into different rooms. I mean, you've probably felt it whenever you've walked in space, you're like, I don't like this. Or immediately the opposite. I've walked into a space and I survive. I like this. I like these people. This feels good. And you can tell when someone is fully convicted in something with, it's not the words that they're saying. They're just fully deeply present with it. It's like, I want to create this. I want this and I want you in it. I want you here and someone who can deeply say energetically, I believe in the work that I do and I'm ready to lead you there.

• 50:58Speaker 01

  That is a complete, that is, that is someone's going to sign up, sign up, sign up, sign up. Versus like, hey, here's this thing, cause you all asked for it.

• 51:05Lewis Howes?

  Yeah. I mean, just cause you can sell something, doesn't mean you should sell something.

• 51:09Speaker 01

  A thousand percent.

• 51:09Lewis Howes?

  You know, I could launch a toothbrush business if I wanted to, but it's like, I don't care about toothbrushes. I'm sure I could sell them.

• 51:16Speaker 01

  You probably could and you probably do very well.

• 51:18Lewis Howes?

  You know, it's like I could do, you could sell anything once you learn how to sell, but just because you can, doesn't mean you should. And it's the highest form of using your energy to make money. Here's one thing then, a lot of people will say, you know, I've got so many ideas. I've got so many ideas. I've got, I want to launch a book and I want to do this course. They got, I don't know what to do. How does someone make a decision on how they're going to make their money?

• 51:43Speaker 01

  Well, one thing that I will say is that a lot of that is actually a nervous system response. That's over, that's classic overwhelm of all of these things, right? And the body will actually do that on purpose so that you won't move. It's actually a very subtle nervous system response of if I keep you more overwhelmed, if I keep you in lack of clarity, then you stay as you are. And that's the nervous system and the subconscious's job. We're not primed for success, which is why this work is so important. But it's, it's job. I will keep you in what I know and how you were raised and what beliefs you have and how you see the world and how you see yourself.

• 52:25Speaker 01

  And I will keep you in what I know is familiar, even if it's not what you want. So that actually is classic nervous system.

• 52:32Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 52:33Speaker 01

  And it is only until that person is able to find clarity and safety in the body and come from a regulated space and then also understand how they make decisions. Because for example, some people make decisions like my youngest is self projected, coming back to human design, which means she can only make a decision when she hears clarity coming from her voice. So it looks like, sweetie, do you want cheese? Do you want an apple? Do you want a smoothie? And then she's like, oh, I want cheese. No, actually I don't. I think I want pancakes. No, I want cereal. And to someone else that could look like, you don't know how to make up your mind. You're wishy washy, you're indecisive, when really she's finding the yes in her voice.

• 53:18Speaker 01

  For me, I'm a spleenic, so mine's intuition. It's very quiet. I just know it and it doesn't make sense. Someone who's a sacred, it's like, it's either there or it's not. But if you're always here, if you're always in the head, you're never going to understand what feels right for you. You know, once you're really in tune with that, you trust it because we've only built trust from the mind.

• 53:41Speaker 01

  And I would say for somebody who's like, I just don't know where to start. If all things of all possibilities equaled success. If every single outcome, if the book launch, the podcast launch, the product launch, all of it resulted in your happiness, all of it resulted in your joy, the money, all of it. What feels like something you can put energy into that feels exciting? Like the thing that you can do now, let's just say you could even do a podcast a little, let's say you could do it all, but maybe not all right now. What do you in this nervous system state, this season of your life, nervous system capacity, your actual season of life, you might be a new mother, you might be, you know, um, you know, coming out of a difficult grief season.

• 54:26Speaker 01

  What do you have capacity, what's easiest for you to feel like you can put your energy in without it backfiring the level of this is too much for me? Because some people like, I want to launch the podcast, but it's not really what they're ready for right now. It doesn't feel energetically aligned right now. And even if it's the thing that you feel is not the thing that you think you should be doing, starting in a place that's easier on the body will always result in a better outcome.

• 54:59Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, it's interesting. When I was broke in my twenties, um, living on my sister's couch, I had a mentor that I was working with for many months. And at one point I was like, gosh, I just, I just don't know what I need to do to make more money. Like, I'm just struggling. No matter what I try, it's not working. And he says something to me, he said, money comes to you when you're ready for it. And I go, man, I feel pretty ready though. I'm like, I'm broke, I could really use money.

• 55:28Speaker 01

  You're probably so angry with that, it's like, what is that?

• 55:30Lewis Howes?

  I know, I was like, I feel ready, like I'm broke, I'm ready to receive, right? But about two years later, I started to make a lot more money. And it started to actually come pretty quickly after that, but I started to make a lot more within the next couple of years, more than I ever imagined or dreamed of. And I reflect back on that and I was like, he was right because I wasn't emotionally, spiritually ready. Um, I also didn't have the language for understanding money. I didn't understand what, what would I do with the money? I just didn't know what would happen. And I think I would have blown it or I would have sabotaged it or something. So I think God or the universe was protecting me from having more money before I was actually ready to receive it.

• 56:14Lewis Howes?

  Because I think I would have made poor decisions or mistakes that maybe would have kept me, held me back even longer. And so I just wasn't emotionally ready for it.

• 56:25Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 56:25Lewis Howes?

  And I think we're constantly expanding our wealth container to receive more based on the internal work that we're doing. Now, also, certain businesses may have, I wouldn't say a cap, I don't want to put a limit on anything, but there may be, you may not be in a business that is scalable enough to make a hundred million dollars in the next few years. Like, that just may not be where you're going to be at. But you could drastically increase your income or your revenue by being creative, using that energy in a different way that unlocks a new level of abundance for you. So when you started to make, because you've had kind of two different paths, a path where you were generating, you know, multiple seven figures in a business prior before this work.

• 57:08Lewis Howes?

  And then a path where you exceeded well beyond that, after you started doing nervous system work around money and business. When you started to unlock financial freedom at a whole new level, where it felt effortless, where it felt in your own human design, where it felt like, oh, I'm just in my natural feminine flow. Was there ever a moment where it became too scary? Because you were like, this is so much money that I didn't even know was possible at this level of ease. And when that came, how did you navigate that?

• 57:42Speaker 01

  The moment it felt like, whoa, whoa, we're at a, we're at another, we're at another level was actually when I said to my husband, I was like, I think we need a financial advisor. I think we need, I think we, I think we have a lot in our bank account and I don't, and what do we do with this? Like, what do we, I don't, what, what is this? And it was just, it was just all coming in. I was like, okay.

• 58:08Lewis Howes?

  Now what?

• 58:10Speaker 01

  Whew, okay. So I remember sitting down with him and he's like, okay, well, yeah, let's, I think, I think we're ready for that. And so we, we got the financial advisors, we had the weekly calls with, with them, we're moving things around. And it was one of those moments where I had to really deeply sit with the fact that we were on a completely different level. And it felt very new. And there was a lot of new decisions that I had to make. There was a lot of different kinds of conversations that I had to have. There was, it was just, it was on a completely unfamiliar level. And I think a lot of people would have been very easily triggered back into, I'm just going to not show up online anymore.

• 58:53Speaker 01

  Like very subtle self sabotage that you don't really, because it's like, oh, I have to, I have to call and I have to, I have to have these conversations, I have to do things that are different, I have to, you know, invest or I have to do these things that maybe you're not familiar with. And it can easily show up in a very subtle way. So that was a big moment for, for me where it felt very stretchy. Oh, we are in a completely different caliber. But also I think simultaneously, because I had been doing so much internal work, I remember saying to myself, it's, you're fine, it's okay, this is new. Like, I was just like parenting myself, you're okay, you're all right, this is new, it's okay. And you're always going to find the right people. Like, there's so many people available to you, there's so many people that want to help

• 59:38Speaker 01

  that are experts that can help you when you don't know. And I think that's the one thing that I've always been very intentional about is like, if I don't know something, I'm going to find someone to support me with that. My dad actually asked me, he's like, what do you think actually allowed for you to be as successful as, as you are? And I said, knowing that I don't know everything and I don't have to. I don't need to know absolutely, I don't have to be an expert in absolutely everything in business, that there are so many experts out there that can support me when I need it. And that doesn't ever have to be a limitation. I think a lot of times, this is what I talk about with my clients all of the time, is that when we talk about the nervous system work, when we talk about subconscious work,

• 1:00:19Speaker 01

  that the conversation that really isn't had is the inner narrative part, which is, how are you actually speaking to yourself? How are you holding yourself in your own indecision? How are you treating yourself when you make mistakes? How much pressure are you putting on yourself? Because pressure and judgment, those two things will absolutely activate your nervous system. They're the two main pieces that will actually create nervous system dysregulation in the body. So the ways that you are unconsciously putting a pressure cooker of stress, uh, and cortisol on your body, just by saying you should be further along, just by saying you should know better, you should figure it out by now, you should have the answers, all of that is judgment, all of that is pressure. And that actually creates more contraction in the body, lack of clarity, and then you're

• 1:01:03Speaker 01

  operating from a completely different part of your brain. But the more that you can actually say, hey, you're all right. I'm so, I'm so proud of you for being brave, for doing those things. And you're right on time, there's no rush, it's all going to work. And you think about it, even the way that that is, when I, when I teach this to my clients, I say, imagine the inner narrative as a separate person outside of you. And imagine you saying, I have these big dreams, I want to make this money, or I want, I have this big, I want to do this huge initiative, or I want to start this, this brand, or I want to launch this product, or I want to do something new. And this person saying to you, you're going to fail, you're going to mess up, you're going to fall down, who's even going to buy from you?

• 1:01:48Speaker 01

  You should be further along, you should be smarter, you don't know enough. What is that going to do to you when you receive it? And it could be a fluctuation of, of aspects, depending on how your body responds to it. So if you had a fight response, you're like, I'll prove it to you that I can, I'll show you. And then it's like the hyper control and then it's like, ah, let me be number one, let me compete, right? And then there's the, the fawn response, which is, okay, you're probably right, I'll just kind of shape shift my way, I'll keep my prices low, I'll keep myself small, just to be acceptable and to, to be, to feel safe that other people are okay around me. There might be the flight response where you just do a whole bunch of busy work, but you don't actually do the work that moves the needle.

• 1:02:28Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:29Speaker 01

  Yeah, and then there might be the freeze response where you're just like, I know the thing that I want to do, but I literally cannot do it. And you also can imagine now, if that person's standing in front of you, and now you have this big open heart and you're excited and you're joyful and you're cannot wait to reach your goals, and maybe just even a little bit scared, right? Because every level of expansion meets up against that. And this person says to you, you are so brave, I got you. Like, even if you might make a mistake, that's okay, you're allowed to, it's okay, I got your back, like, anything that happens, I'm going to be right by your side. I think you're amazing, I think you're incredible, I think you're worthy, I think you're important, I think that this is the coolest thing that you could ever be doing, and I think there's

• 1:03:13Speaker 01

  so much space for you. How would that allow for you to feel driven, brave, taking new risks, putting yourself out there if you always knew that you were the safest place to come back to? Because that's why people are a lot, a lot of why people are afraid to make mistakes. They are not a safe environment to come back to. So they'll do anything to avoid

• 1:03:34Lewis Howes?

  Pain.

• 1:03:34Speaker 01

  Whatever you are about to experience within your own experience.

• 1:03:37Lewis Howes?

  Wow. What do you think would be the biggest thing that holds you back from doubling your business, doubling your audience over the next 12 months, two years, three years, whatever it might be, even if that is something you want?

• 1:03:51Speaker 01

  I do, I do. And then I will always say that the work is not about me, it's not about me, it's about, it's always been beyond me. And it's been very similar to what you were saying, like, the work is, you were kind of shifting into, I want to, I want to provide awareness and service of other people and have these amazing expansive conversations. And for me, that has always been true about this work, because it is so deeply important, because I navigated it, because I see it, because the statistics of entrepreneurship and mental health and the way that it actually affects the body and the health of the body is so startling that.

• 1:04:34Speaker 01

  I need to be able to get out of my own limitations so that the work can reach more people because this is what can actually support people in their health and being more deeply present with their families and being happier and being more joyful and also having the impact because there's so many entrepreneurs that really truly want to make a really big impact. And I firmly believe that if we had more awareness around that, imagine all of the heart-led leaders, just like, how would that be life-changing? And we can't do that if we're constantly dysregulated and living not in our power. And I think the limitation for me would be me.

• 1:05:17Speaker 01

  It would be where it's the very human essence of the nervous system, the real human experience of I need to be able to get out of the way. And I just need to be able to speak and to share and to be able to spread this as far as it can go.

• 1:05:36Lewis Howes?

  That's cool. How can I be of support or service to you?

• 1:05:40Speaker 01

  I think you're already doing it. Yeah, I think you're already doing it. I think just by having this conversation, it's just so meaningful to so many people. And it's such an important conversation because it doesn't even impact the existing people who are in business, but the dreamers, the kids who are deeply desiring to do big things or the conversations that might affect a parent and the work that they get to do within themselves and how they get to parent differently and then how they spread that message to their children and just how it it's sometimes I even say it's just not even about the money. It's not even about the business. It's like, how can we just experience being more balanced and more centered and more happy and more joyful and more powerful and in service to other people?

• 1:06:25Speaker 01

  And I just think you're already doing that.

• 1:06:27Lewis Howes?

  Well, that's cool. That's cool. Well, I'm excited for this to be out there because I think a lot of people are gonna find this very valuable. So I want to acknowledge you, Jamie, for showing up today. For people that don't know, we recorded yesterday, but the whole power went off here. And so I feel like there was a reason why, because this was really powerful. So I'm really glad that you're here.

• 1:06:46Speaker 01

  Me too.

• 1:06:46Lewis Howes?

  And I acknowledge you for stepping into your power and being a voice to so many women, mostly women, who are stepping into their power because of your content, because of your coaching and your methods. And I truly believe when more women step into their power energetically and they create from a space of wholeness, it is so empowering to watch women be able to fully step into their energetic flow, into their confidence and be of service in the world rather than feeling like they need to play small or whatever they've been conditioned, certain women have done. And so I acknowledge you for being that voice and I'm excited to see where you continue to grow into. So congratulations and everything.

• 1:07:31Speaker 01

  Thank you.

• 1:07:31Lewis Howes?

  I have two final questions for you. Before I ask them, I want people to check out your podcast, The Jamie C Show. And also you have the Jamie C dot com, which you have different workshops on there, courses, coaching, where people can find out the energy of the sale workshop if they want to learn how to really sell from a energetic space. And Jamie C official on Instagram. So we'll have all this linked up where people can learn more about your content and what you offer. But this is a question I ask everyone towards the end called the three truths. So imagine hypothetical scenario, you get to live as long as you want on this earth, but eventually it's the last day for you. And you get to create whatever you want to create from this moment on until the last day.

• 1:08:13Lewis Howes?

  But for whatever reason in the hypothetical question, you have to take all of your work with you when you pass on from this earth. So we don't have this conversation anymore. Any content you put out, it's all gone. But you get to leave behind three lessons to the world, three truths. What would those three truths be for you?

• 1:08:31Speaker 01

  The three truths that I would want to leave behind is be present.

• 1:08:39Speaker 01

  Because that really is the biggest gift of everything. Because when you are here in the now, it gets to be really beautiful. Love more deeply yourself and listen. Those are the three truths I would say is that when you are deeply present, when you are in the moment, everything that you desire actually can be found. And you feel so deeply regulated and you feel so calm. And when you listen and when you love, it's just, life just gets to feel so much more beautiful.

• 1:09:16Speaker 01

  And you also just don't even understand the amount of impact that you have when you emit just that alone, when you walk past somebody and you hold the door for them or you ask them how their day is. And that is the thing that someone else is going home and feeling better about. It's the conversations that you're having with people in the grocery store. It's the the time that you spend, not on your phone, with people that you love. It's being able to hold space and to be able just to to love and to care for people. And I mean, really, that's, I think at the end of the day, that's really why we're all here.

• 1:09:56Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, that's cool.

• 1:09:58Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:09:58Lewis Howes?

  Final question, Jamie, what's your definition of greatness?

• 1:10:02Speaker 01

  Allowing yourself to be fully who you were always created to be. Yeah. Without the stories, without holding the baggage of what came before you is what do you want to believe? What do you want your story to be? What do you want to create while you're here? And that is, I would say, the epitome of greatness.

• 1:10:25Lewis Howes?

  Jamie, thanks for being here. Appreciate you.

• 1:10:27Speaker 01

  Thank you.

• 1:10:27Lewis Howes?

  Powerful.

• 1:10:28Speaker 01

  Beautiful, beautiful. Thank you.

• 1:10:30Lewis Howes?

  I hope you enjoyed today's episode and it inspired you on your journey towards greatness. Make sure to check out the show notes in the description for a full rundown of today's episode with all the important links. And if you want weekly exclusive bonus episodes with me personally, as well as ad-free listening, then make sure to subscribe to our Greatness Plus channel exclusively on Apple Podcasts. Share this with a friend on social media and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts as well. Let me know what you enjoyed about this episode in that review. I really love hearing feedback from you and it helps us figure out how we can support and serve you moving forward. And I want to remind you, if no one has told you lately, that you are loved, you are worthy, and you matter.

• 1:11:14Lewis Howes?

  And now it's time to go out there and do something great.