653 Become Superhuman and Achieve the Impossible with Iron Cowboy James Lawrence

"AS A PEOPLE, WE NEED TO FIGURE OUT WHAT OUR ALTER EGO IS.” One of the hardest things for us to deal with is pain. Our mind tries to prevent us from experiencing it. It's just trying to protect us and keep us alive. When we push through that pain, however, that’s when we accomplish greatness. Now I don’t mean continuing with a broken arm. I mean pushing through those tough times when your mind is trying to tell your body to stop, but you know you have more to give. That’s why I wanted to bring you today’s guest, the Iron Cowboy himself: James Lawrence. James did 50 Ironman Triathlons, in 50 days, in 50 states. He was constantly on the move for 12 hours a day, running, swimming, and cycling. As soon as he was finished, he had to travel to the next state. Most days James only had about four hours to rest. That’s no time for your body to recover. Did he hurt? Did he want to give up? Of course. But James ended up powering through, breaking a Guinness World Record. At the end of the 50 days, his body had begun to accept that this was its new reality (and he felt like he needed to do another triathlon after he finished!) Humans can push themselves so much further than we think. We just need to get over our mental barriers to see what we can really achieve. Learn what it takes to develop your skills and overcome your boundaries, on Episode 653. Some Questions I Ask: The universe was telling you to quit, how and why did you continue? (12:01) When did you do your first Ironman Triathlon? (21:00) Why do you think it’s important to put your body through a stress that your mind says no to? (25:36) What was your greatest fear growing up? (29:16) What’s the greatest personal struggle you’ve ever faced? (32:15) Were the conversations you were having with yourself more about forgiveness or the future you wanted to create? (37:56) How much mental training did it take for you to find your alter ego? (42:53) What’s your mental routine on a daily basis? (52:56) In This Episode You Will Learn: How James helped someone with Cerebral Palsy finish the triathlon (7:29) How long it takes for him to finish an Ironman Triathlon (14:32) The greatest lesson he’s learned from all 50 Ironmans (24:34) Something we can do on a daily basis to help us increase our mental toughness (27:25) How he’s preparing his children to take on the world (30:45) What he thinks about at hour 7 of the day during a race (34:51) The power of his alter ego (39:42) Why he felt the need to achieve the impossible (47:25) Get more from Lewis! Get my New York Times Bestselling book, Make Money Easy! Get The Greatness Mindset audiobook on SpotifyText Lewis AIYouTubeInstagramWebsiteTiktokFacebookX

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Lewis Howes?

  This is episode number 653 with Iron Cowboy James Lawrence. Welcome to the School of Greatness. My name is Lewis Howes, former pro athlete turned lifestyle entrepreneur. And each week, we bring you an inspiring person or message to help you discover how to unlock your inner greatness. Thanks for spending some time with me today. Now let the class begin.

• 0:31Lewis Howes?

  Maya Angelou said, "You may encounter many defeats, but you must not be defeated. In fact, it may be necessary to encounter the defeats so you can know who you are, what you can rise from, how you can still come out of it." I'm excited about this episode because I don't think I've ever met a man who's put himself through this much pain. This man is James Lawrence. He's a record-setting triathlete known as the Iron Cowboy. He holds the current world record for the most Ironman distance triathlons completed within a single calendar year, 30 of them in 2012.

• 1:11Lewis Howes?

  He also holds the record for the most half-Ironman distance triathlons in one year, 22 in 2011. In 2015, he completed the insanely crazy 50 Ironman-length triathlons in 50 consecutive days, one in each of the 50 US states. Yes, I did not mistake myself in what I said. This man is almost insane, but he's so cool at the same time. And I was so excited to connect with him, to learn about how he disciplined his mind to go through so much pain

• 1:54Lewis Howes?

  in such a long time. You know, we're talking 12, 14 hours at a time to complete one of these Ironman triathlons. And to do it every single day for 50 days, it just blows my mind. So I wanted to learn how. How he was able to even train for this? How he was able to get a big enough why to stick it out? You know, sometimes people can't even do a 20 minute workout. And he's doing 50 days in a row, 14 hours a day, basically killing himself. How was he able to find a deep enough why? How do you keep going when you want to quit? How do you restart your career after you failed big? You know, we talked about the key to accomplishing a massive goal and avoid overwhelm or breakdown.

• 2:39Lewis Howes?

  Also, whether talent or hard work matters more in high performance. And the best way to talk to yourself when you're alone and struggling. This, my friends, and so much more, is a powerful episode. Make sure to share with your friends, LewisHowes.com/653. Tag me at Lewis Howes on Instagram. Let me know that you're listening and check out the full video interview, show notes back there as well. Before we dive in, big shout out to the fan of the week. This is from Dig Kid, who said, "Truly great. Ever since I was a little kid, I knew I wanted to do great things. Throughout my life, when I talked about this drive inside me, people around me didn't believe in me or didn't take what I said seriously.

• 3:24Lewis Howes?

  For so long, I felt like I was the only one who felt this way, until I found the School of Greatness. For the first time in my life, I feel I've actually found a community that I belong to. This podcast changed my life. The first time I listened to an episode, my entire mindset that had felt so unusual from those around me was instantly validated. The information, energy, guidance, and self-elevating content on this podcast is 100% priceless." So my friend, Dig Kid, you are not alone. And anyone else listening, you are not alone. If you've got that crazy passion, desire, dream, energy, you've got a community right here. It's called the School of Greatness.

• 4:09Lewis Howes?

  Welcome to the family. We gotta do a big family group hug sometime. And I think at the Summit of Greatness, I'm gonna have everyone who attends the Summit of Greatness this year, we're gonna do, uh, we're gonna try to create the biggest group hug possible.

• 4:26Lewis Howes?

  And maybe one year, we'll be able to do the biggest, we'll create our own world record for the biggest group hug. That's what I want to create. So I want to see you guys there. Summitofgreatness.com. Make sure you get your ticket for the event in October. Big thank you again to Dig Kid. If you guys haven't left your review yet, you can do that on the podcast app on your phone, or go to School of Greatness over on iTunes and leave one there.

• 4:52Lewis Howes?

  Welcome back everyone to the School of Greatness podcast. We've got the Iron Cowboy, James Lawrence in the house. Good to see you, man.

• 4:58Speaker 01

  Good to be here.

• 4:59Lewis Howes?

  Excited about this one. You did something crazy a few years ago. Let me make sure I got it right. 50 Ironmans in 50 states in 50 days. Is that right?

• 5:08Speaker 01

  Correct.

• 5:09Lewis Howes?

  50 Ironman triathlons. Is that what it's called?

• 5:13Speaker 01

  Yeah, so triathlon is anything swim, bike, or run.

• 5:15Lewis Howes?

  Yep.

• 5:16Speaker 01

  Ironman is a brand. It is a full distance triathlon. And so we covered the distance of a full distance triathlon every day for 50 days, which is seven weeks. And then we did one in every state. And so for seven weeks, wake up, do a full distance Ironman, and call it a day.

• 5:33Lewis Howes?

  And what's the distances for the Ironman?

• 5:36Speaker 01

  So an Ironman or full distance triathlon is a 2.4 mile swim, 112 mile bike, followed by a standard 26.2 mile marathon run, which totals 140.6 miles.

• 5:51Lewis Howes?

  In a day?

• 5:52Speaker 01

  In a day. So the entire 50 days, we covered just over 7,000 miles across the country.

• 5:58Lewis Howes?

  So a full marathon every day for 50 days by itself is a lot, but you added 100 and something mile bike and a two mile plus swim.

• 6:06Speaker 01

  Correct.

• 6:07Lewis Howes?

  And one of the days, you took a kid with you, right? Who was cerebral palsy?

• 6:12Speaker 01

  Yep.

• 6:13Lewis Howes?

  And you swam with him?

• 6:14Speaker 01

  Yep.

• 6:15Lewis Howes?

  He trailed in the back in like a little toe boat thing.

• 6:17Speaker 01

  Yep.

• 6:18Lewis Howes?

  You biked with him and you ran with him, right?

• 6:20Speaker 01

  Right.

• 6:21Lewis Howes?

  It's crazy, man.

• 6:22Speaker 01

  So the whole Dayton story is unique in itself. So in 2012, leading up to the 50, I broke the Guinness World Record for the most official Ironman events in a single calendar year.

• 6:32Lewis Howes?

  In a year?

• 6:33Speaker 01

  In a year.

• 6:33Lewis Howes?

  30?

• 6:34Speaker 01

  30, yep. And in that year, on Race 27, is when I spent that day with Dayton. And we had some complications, difficulty turned into a huge day. And we just made the cutoff by less than 25 minutes and gave him his first Ironman medal. And so I wanted to kind of have a do-over with Dayton in 2015 when we were doing the 50. But I didn't realize, and I have no idea why I wouldn't have realized this, but the compounding effect of an Ironman a day is insane, right? And you did 30 in a year. Right, and then so- You had a week off. Yeah, exactly, right? So I'm like, ah, it should be okay. But so by the time we got to Dayton on the 50, on day number seven, I'd already torn my shoulder. I was completely exhausted.

• 7:17Speaker 01

  We were trying to figure out logistics. We'd hit a deer in the middle of the night coming to, from Vegas to Arizona. And Dayton shows up and I'm just like panicked and I don't know how I'm going to pull him in this day. And so the wingman, I had two guys with me full-time that were everything to me. For the whole tour? Casey and Aaron, yeah, for the whole 50 days. They came out with me, you know, we called them the wingmen. But they were unbelievable. And so Casey, Casey and Aaron were exhausted as much as I was because they had to help me all day and then drive all night, right? So 24 hours a day. So we're seven days into this. And they're exhausted and they go, I'm, Dayton's sitting there and I'm like, dude, I don't know if I can.

• 8:00Speaker 01

  And Casey goes, I'll pull him. I'll pull him in the swim beside you. And then Aaron goes, I'll pull him on the bike and then we'll do them together on the run. And so the three of us kind of worked together to get Dayton through this day because we were so exhausted, seven days in, having no idea how we were going to do this. And Dayton's sitting there, right? And he's excited to do this event. And so we were kind of like, okay, how are we going to do this? And so it's just a really cool, I still want another do-over with Dayton because- By yourself. Yeah, for me to do it and have another experience with him. Problem is, he's almost 20 now and he's a big- He's a bigger- He's a big kid. And so back then in 2012, you know, he was in his teens

• 8:44Speaker 01

  and between him and his cardio, he still weighed 195 pounds. So now, I mean, we're gonna be pushing 250, which adds a ton of complications and things like that. So who knows if it'll ever happen? I've had two real special days with Dayton.

• 8:56Lewis Howes?

  That's cool.

• 8:57Speaker 01

  That I'll never forget. And one that I got to share with the wingman, and they kinda helped get Dayton through that. So special moments in my journey have been with him.

• 9:05Lewis Howes?

  So seven days in, you're thinking to yourself, what did I get myself into?

• 9:09Speaker 01

  Oh dude, day one, I'm thinking to myself, what did I get myself?

• 9:11Lewis Howes?

  You're like, I need a few days to recover.

• 9:13Speaker 01

  Well, for sure. Cause 50 states includes Hawaii and Alaska. And so you have to fly. You have to fly. That's the only way.

• 9:21Lewis Howes?

  Sleep on a plane, no recovery.

• 9:22Speaker 01

  Sleep on a plane, no recovery. So the first three events that we did, three full Ironmans, three days, three states, total six and a half hours of sleep on an airplane, right? And to do the first one, in order to get off the island of Hawaii into Alaska, we had to start the first one at midnight. So no sleep going into this project, and then do the first three on no sleep. And so waking up on day number four, you're like, that was the real, that was kinda the real moment where you're like, oh my gosh, I have 40, I have 47 consecutive Ironmans, and we have no idea how this is gonna happen. And then every single day, we were presented with incredible reasons to quit and back out of this.

• 10:00Lewis Howes?

  Injury, no sleep.

• 10:02Speaker 01

  Oh, just, yeah, just logistics.

• 10:04Lewis Howes?

  Hitting a deer.

• 10:04Speaker 01

  Yeah, oh man, it just, I mean, you hit a deer in the middle of the night, it takes out your generator, and you can no longer take food with you because your fridge is gone. That's not something you planned for on day six, to have no solution for food. And when I've gotta feed a crew, and 12,000 calories a day for me, I mean, where are you getting your food, right? Cause everything became so minute to minute and chaotic. Solve this problem early, right? And so just, just, things compounded immediately out of the gates, starting on day one. And then it just was like this master puzzle of how to problem solve.

• 10:38Lewis Howes?

  The universe was telling you, you should quit. You should give up, you should stop. You're crazy, don't do this.

• 10:44Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 10:44Lewis Howes?

  So why did you, how did you push through? And why did you continue?

• 10:48Speaker 01

  It wasn't even an option, it wasn't even on the table. We were all in as a team. A lot of people don't know this about my story, it's in the book, Redefine Impossible. But in 2008, I owned a mortgage company. And then we lost everything. And this was Like every mortgage broker. Every, exactly. I mean, I'm not unique in that scenario, but it hit our sector incredibly hard. And we fought for two years, tried to recoup and just ended up losing everything. Which was really hard for me as a father, as a husband, as a provider, right? I've got five kids and just to be just diminished to nothing. And so this was a rebuild. This was an opportunity to do something where I had passion about and to hopefully have impact and get people to shift their mindsets.

• 11:30Speaker 01

  And so when I'm sitting there and everything's saying quit, for me, it wasn't an option. And I had to figure out a way to continue to move this forward because I knew if we got to the other side of this, doors would open up. Opportunities would change. And I've been shoved into this, trust me, I'm not a, I'm not a designed motivational speaker. That's Tony Robbins. That's what he, that's his jam, right? But the demand for it and what we did was so, you know, on the far side of possibility. Extreme, yeah. Extreme, that it's just, it's really pushed and navigated us towards doing this as a career. And from stage, I talk about becoming uncomfortable intentionally. And that, that's how you evolve and you adapt and you grow and you learn. And for me, people are always like, what's next?

• 12:14Speaker 01

  And I'm like, dude, hey, there's no, there's no physical or mental next. Like that was it. For me now, it's getting up on stage and doing these podcasts. This is me becoming uncomfortable intentionally so that I, I can impact people and help them get unstuck from the current situation that they're in. And so that was a huge driving factor for us. I was like You knew on the other side of pain was On the other side of these seven weeks is a new life, is a new opportunity, is the gateway to our family having an opportunity, impact and help people. And ultimately, that's, that's what the, a massive driving force for this was. And man, we have been, been humbled, just last year, traveled to 30 countries, sharing the message and the story. People are just craving it. And the message that we get now

• 12:59Speaker 01

  After someone has felt part of our journey and the changes that they're making is so humbling and so gratifying and what wakes me up every day and wants me to keep driving.

• 13:10Lewis Howes?

  That's great. How long does it take on average to finish the Ironman, triathlon?

• 13:15Speaker 01

  So, on a world stage?

• 13:17Lewis Howes?

  For you?

• 13:18Speaker 01

  For me, okay. So, anything just great under 10 hours is a great day for me.

• 13:22Lewis Howes?

  If you're doing 50 in a row?

• 13:24Speaker 01

  50 in a row, you're talking 14 to 17 hours.

• 13:26Lewis Howes?

  Okay, but if you're doing one, you're fresh, you've had a month of training.

• 13:29Speaker 01

  Nine something.

• 13:30Lewis Howes?

  Nine something. It's like your best. And what's like the world record?

• 13:33Speaker 01

  World record was just set again. It's just under, just under eight hours.

• 13:36Lewis Howes?

  Got it, okay.

• 13:37Speaker 01

  At the world championships, the pros at a professional level in the prime of their career, 803 to 805.

• 13:42Lewis Howes?

  Wow.

• 13:43Speaker 01

  They're right in there.

• 13:43Lewis Howes?

  So, you're doing nine on a great day?

• 13:45Speaker 01

  Yep.

• 13:46Lewis Howes?

  Which is still incredible.

• 13:47Speaker 01

  Sure.

• 13:47Lewis Howes?

  The average athlete is doing 20 probably.

• 13:50Speaker 01

  They're 14. The time cap is 17.

• 13:52Lewis Howes?

  Oh, really?

• 13:53Speaker 01

  Yeah, they cut you off at 17. They close the course, you're done.

• 13:55Lewis Howes?

  Got it.

• 13:55Speaker 01

  And so, your majority of the field is coming in 13, 14, 15 hours. That's kind of like, I've done it. Benchmarks are break 12, break 10, break 9.

• 14:06Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 14:07Speaker 01

  Right? Those are your big benchmarks.

• 14:08Lewis Howes?

  You've really got to pace yourself if you're doing 50 in a row.

• 14:10Speaker 01

  Oh, it's a totally different game.

• 14:12Lewis Howes?

  It's a slow game.

• 14:13Speaker 01

  It's a slow game. It's a big picture. And a lot of people don't have that, right? They just go out of the gate and implode. Yeah, guys try to do this type of thing all the time and they don't understand what it takes and how durable you have to be and what type of athlete you have to be. We were heavily criticized for the amount of strength training we did leading up to the 50. They're like, dude, this is a 50-day endurance training. What are you doing? Powerlifting?

• 14:35Lewis Howes?

  You had to, though.

• 14:36Speaker 01

  Absolutely. But they don't understand, look, the way to get injured is to not do physical strength. I had to go into the 50 kind of like as a lineman, knowing that I was going to be, you just break down.

• 14:50Lewis Howes?

  Wear down.

• 14:51Speaker 01

  There was no recovery on the 50. There was no, it was a matter of holding on and staying mentally sharp. And we averaged four hours of sleep a night. You don't recover in four hours of sleep.

• 15:00Lewis Howes?

  Your body?

• 15:00Speaker 01

  It doesn't.

• 15:01Lewis Howes?

  Get through it.

• 15:01Speaker 01

  Yeah, it doesn't get through it. The only way it gets through is if you're strong enough. So, guys try this all the time and they get sidelined with ligament injuries and tendons and stress fractures and all these things.

• 15:11Lewis Howes?

  And then you're done.

• 15:12Speaker 01

  And you're done. You physically can't, you can't do it. And it's not a matter of pain. It's just you, if a ligament snaps, like you snapping Achilles, you're done.

• 15:21Lewis Howes?

  Done.

• 15:22Speaker 01

  I don't care how mentally tough you are and whatnot, that's something you can't overcome. I crashed on the bike on day 18. I fell asleep on my bike and crashed. But because I was durable enough, I didn't break my collarbones. I didn't, I didn't snap an arm. I didn't, I was able to navigate and, and fight through the pain and teach my body, look, we're gonna do an Ironman tomorrow. And so you've got to figure out how to heal during this process. And so even, even during training, as we were building strength, when, when something would come up, I didn't, I didn't take the time off. I put a great team around me and I was like, look, I have to teach my body to adapt while under stress.

• 16:00Lewis Howes?

  Mm-hmm.

• 16:01Speaker 01

  If I teach my body that when it, when it presents pain to me, that I'm going to stop, it's gonna go, okay, this is, as soon as I present pain, he's gonna back off, right? And so I had to teach my body, look, you're gonna show me pain, but I'm going to teach you and you have to recoup and recover because we have to do it again tomorrow. And it got to the point where my body was becoming so efficient that it, it craved. It craved doing an Ironman, the single hardest endurance event in, in sports. My body craved wanting to do it. It expected.

• 16:35Lewis Howes?

  It started to recover quick and say, when are we going next?

• 16:38Speaker 01

  As soon as I stopped, it said, I have four hours. I have four hours and he's going to go again.

• 16:43Lewis Howes?

  And it's gonna regenerate, it's gonna be strong, you're gonna be awake, alert.

• 16:46Speaker 01

  What people don't realize is, is by giving my body an opportunity to recoup, recover, and, and force it into adaptation, my last 20 in a year of 50 where they said it was impossible were my fastest 20.

• 16:59Lewis Howes?

  Wow.

• 16:59Speaker 01

  Right?

• 17:00Lewis Howes?

  I believe it though.

• 17:01Speaker 01

  For sure.

• 17:01Lewis Howes?

  I believe it. I mean, as a decathlete, I remember my first decathlon in college, it took me like two weeks to recover. This is a two-day event, 10 events. It's not as extreme as a 14-hour Ironman triathlon. But for me, it's extreme in the sense that it's a lot of explosion. It's like the fastest you can go, the most power, the most jumping.

• 17:20Speaker 01

  Oh, the decathlon, that's a, that's a tough job.

• 17:22Lewis Howes?

  It's, it's a whole nother type of using your body. And I was just, I mean, in my bed for two weeks, like barely jogging to recover. And every month I would do another one and it got a little easier. And I remember I needed to make the cut for the national to qualify for the national championships. They only take the top 16 in the country. And my score was at like 20. So I knew that I had to do another decathlon about five days before the national championships to give myself a chance of making it. And I do this, I do them like back to back weekends. And I just trained my body more and more to recover faster that I was stronger every time I did that.

• 18:06Lewis Howes?

  And when I did the back to back weeks, it was like I was even stronger the next time with four days recovery, going into the next decathlon. Initially, right when I started, I was like, man, I feel tired. But after the first event, it was like my body kicked into like recovery mode. It's kind of like when you go to the gym and you do a hard leg day. And then two days later, you can barely walk.

• 18:23Speaker 01

  Yeah, or sit on a toilet.

• 18:24Lewis Howes?

  Or sit and do anything, but you do like more legs again and you're like, how am I gonna do this? But after a few minutes, your body like, the soreness goes away.

• 18:33Speaker 01

  It's crazy. That's the hardest thing is to get back into the gym because after a long break, you're like, man, I am going to be so sore. But once you get through that, and then you can, like, perfect example is riding a bike. I could do, when I was in the peak of my training, six hours in a saddle was nothing.

• 18:46Lewis Howes?

  Oh my gosh.

• 18:47Speaker 01

  And then after taking two years off, being forced to recover and being on these tours, I go do a two hour workout on the bike now and I'm like, holy cow. I took for granted the, the just conditioning that, that you get into and what that looks like. And so, because when we announced the, the 50, I was just coming off the 30. I was in peak condition. It was literally the next logical step for me. And when we announced it, we were mocked and ridiculed for, because they could not comprehend that, that it was even possible. And I, and I couldn't comprehend why they didn't think it was, right? Because from where I was sitting, the progression was.

• 19:21Lewis Howes?

  You just done 30.

• 19:22Speaker 01

  I just done 30.

• 19:23Lewis Howes?

  In a year.

• 19:24Speaker 01

  In a year.

• 19:25Lewis Howes?

  50 in 50 days.

• 19:26Speaker 01

  It, it is still crazy, but for me, in my mind, it wasn't that big of a leap.

• 19:30Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 19:31Speaker 01

  But for the, the person who. Has a hard time conceptualizing 5K.

• 19:35Lewis Howes?

  Mm hmm. They're like, you're crazy.

• 19:37Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's not, it's not possible.

• 19:38Lewis Howes?

  You're crazy.

• 19:39Speaker 01

  Yeah, and I get that.

• 19:39Lewis Howes?

  When did you do your first Ironman triathlon?

• 19:42Speaker 01

  So I got into triathlon with my wife about 12 years ago.

• 19:45Lewis Howes?

  Uh huh.

• 19:45Speaker 01

  And we started just doing the sprints, the real fast, short, close ones, which is so fun. I'm actually excited to get back into, into doing the short distance explosive stuff. Uh, but I did, I did my first Ironman distance in 2008. And so I think I was 32.

• 20:00Lewis Howes?

  Mm hmm.

• 20:01Speaker 01

  And then it just, it just escalated really quick.

• 20:03Lewis Howes?

  You got hooked. You were addicted.

• 20:05Speaker 01

  I got hooked and, and what's, what's unique about the longer distance is there's so, there's so much more that goes into it. It's not just swimming, biking, running. It's can I master recovery? Can I master preparation? Can I master the mental side of stuff? Can I plan properly? The nutrition component is, is so, so key. And so it became, I've got to master five or six different categories in order to excel at the sport.

• 20:29Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 20:29Speaker 01

  And now I've done 90, 90 Ironmans and, and just still, still the distance scares me because there's so many, there's so many unknowns and things that you like this, this sport and this distance just demands so much respect. I always laugh on the inside when someone hasn't done an Ironman and then they do their first and then I'll get a message that says, what you did was unbelievable, but I didn't truly understand what it was until.

• 20:55Lewis Howes?

  I did one.

• 20:56Speaker 01

  I did one and there is no way I was waking up tomorrow and doing another one, right? That's, that's kind of the, some of the greatest compliments I can get when somebody really puts it into perspective and has had an experience.

• 21:06Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 21:07Speaker 01

  And then it's like, oh man, this is, this, what you did was a whole nother level.

• 21:10Lewis Howes?

  I've never done a half marathon and I know if I did that, I'd be like, I'm done, you know, it's like, I couldn't even do this. But I'm sure once you push your body to those limits, it starts to say, yeah, you can do another.

• 21:20Speaker 01

  People say the headline 50, right? The story of the 50. They don't realize the decade that went in and the groundwork and the foundation that went into that. And then even, even the past two years is still part of that journey because it's, it's the recovery on the backside of that to get me back to where I'm functioning, right? And I can be a competitive athlete again.

• 21:39Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 21:40Speaker 01

  It's, it's not, it's not the 50 days. Back up real quick though, you, you were saying. About fatigue and adaptation and the decathlon. If I did a journey like this again, which I won't. But like if, let's say I was to do a week-long challenge. I would almost put myself under pretty intense stress. Leading up to it. Because I want to get through that difficult adaptation phase.

• 22:04Lewis Howes?

  Right.

• 22:04Speaker 01

  Knowing I'm gonna get stronger, right? I don't want my first seven days of an intense challenge to be the first seven days.

• 22:11Lewis Howes?

  Refresh.

• 22:12Speaker 01

  Right, there's a fine balance there, right? There's a tipping point where you've done too much. But I need to put my body in training. I've got to be conscious of the stress load that needs to be put on. And people are like, you want to take that time off and do this and that? You're forgetting that first week is traumatizing. And it's, your body's trying to figure out. It takes time for the mind and body to come into alignment, right? For me, it was day thirty. How many people quit before thirty consecutive Ironmans before? Mind and body come into sync? Everybody, right? Ninety-nine point nine percent of people quit. I'm telling you, when mind and body come into harmony? That's when magic happens. Everybody's missing out on the magic. Because they quit because it's too hard, they don't allow that adaptation.

• 22:55Speaker 01

  You have to learn that the next step isn't gonna kill you.

• 22:58Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 22:58Speaker 01

  And it's in that next step that you learn. You adapt, you grow, you evolve. We quit before that moment and then very few people ever get the opportunity to experience. What our team did thirty through fifty. To where an Ironman a day became routine.

• 23:13Lewis Howes?

  What was the greatest lesson you learned from all fifty?

• 23:15Speaker 01

  Oh, man, mankind is alive and well. And people can shift and it's okay to change your mind about a person. And the amount of people that came out and helped us. Nothing great ever is accomplished on our own, right? I had an unbelievable team behind me. I had a nation and now a globe that has come out and supported what we've done. I want to give back. I want to continue to share this story because of the impact that it's having. And so the biggest thing that I learned is mankind is cool. And to go around to thirty countries, we're unified. To not listen to all the crazy stuff that's going on in the world and just connect with people.

• 23:49Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 23:49Speaker 01

  And I think a lot of people are scared and don't do that. And again, they're missing out on.

• 23:53Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 23:54Speaker 01

  On really cool experiences.

• 23:56Lewis Howes?

  Now, you said something that I love and I've been talking about since high school is. Really putting yourself in uncomfortable situations as often as possible. Like demanding pain every single day in a safe environment, right? Not asking like someone break my arm type of pain.

• 24:14Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 24:14Lewis Howes?

  Putting your body through a type of stress that your mind says no.

• 24:21Lewis Howes?

  Why do you think that's such an important thing for every human to do? And what's the best way in your mind that we could do that every single day?

• 24:28Speaker 01

  We're either moving forward or we're digressing. We're never just standing still, right? So the longer we stay in our little comfort, happy zone, we're eventually gonna start to go backwards.

• 24:38Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 24:39Speaker 01

  And so this concept of intentionally doing something difficult is a thing of beauty. When, when we started to run into situations where we were faced with adversity and, and one early on, I was like, yes, this is great. Like, challenge us right now because we're strong. Mentally, we're tough right now. And that perseverance and resilience that we're gonna gain right now, man, I can't tell you how much we're gonna need that in the back half of this thing.

• 25:01Lewis Howes?

  Wow.

• 25:02Speaker 01

  And so when, when we were, when we were up against it early on, I was like, yeah, this is great. We need to learn this stuff now, quick. Like, this is, we're not have time. This learning curve has gotta be accelerated. And so, so man, I, I think, I think people need to embrace challenges. It forces you to think and it, when you're backed into a corner and even though you can hit the panic button and choose not to see it, that's when you're gonna solve the biggest problems. I mean, when we lost everything in 2008, I was either going to be complacent or I was gonna face some challenges, some demons and fears and come out on the other side of that. Looking back, that was the best thing that ever happened to us, to, to lose everything.

• 25:39Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 25:39Speaker 01

  It forced me to challenge. I would have never done this. I'd still be miserable writing mortgage loans, right? And, and just sucking at life, right? And so because that happened, it forced me into a scenario to where I had to become a problem solver. It's such a blessing. I wish more people would hit rock bottom. Because it, it helps them realize that, look, I can, I can do so much more.

• 26:02Lewis Howes?

  Yeah. What's something that we can do on a daily basis to help us increase our mental toughness? Or put ourselves through challenge or pain that's not gonna kill us?

• 26:12Speaker 01

  Yeah, you know, everybody's gonna be different. I talk about how everybody's hard is different.

• 26:17Lewis Howes?

  Everyone's hard.

• 26:18Speaker 01

  Everybody's hard is different, right?

• 26:20Lewis Howes?

  What's hard for you might be easy for me or for other persons.

• 26:23Speaker 01

  And it's hard to also say, hey, this is what you need to do because where are you at your journey? At the beginning, middle, end? Are you approaching a different realm than anybody else's? So for you or anybody else, it's, look, just write down your 10 biggest fears. And then let's find the least scary of those 10 and then break it into 10 categories and then let's attack that. And then overcome these at such a small level. And as you start to have these small victories, right? Success breeds success, confidence breeds confidence. And as soon as we have these small breakthroughs, now we can start attacking some of our bigger fears, right? Whatever your fears are, whatever your heart is, we've got to ice like that. You've got to be conscious, you've got to have some conversations with yourself, right?

• 27:08Speaker 01

  That's the only way an individual is going to find out, look, what scares me? What's holding me back? What is going to be the best version of me and how do I find that? And so you have to engage with these conversations. That's why I love riding my bike. Because it's me, my brain, you know, and just allowing thoughts to flow and process. And so I either come home with some of my worst ideas or best ideas after a bike ride. My wife gets scared when I do these long rides. It's in those moments that you're gonna say, look, what are my fears? How am I gonna overcome those? And then we have to break those down and go, look, how do I overcome this smallest of small? And then as you progress, next thing you know, you're gonna wake up and go, man, that's not scary anymore.

• 27:46Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 27:47Speaker 01

  And I've grown as a person, I'm a better individual. And as you continue to do that process, you're gonna wake up one day and you go, man, I've come a long way.

• 27:56Lewis Howes?

  Yeah. What was your greatest fear growing up?

• 27:58Speaker 01

  Great question. As a father, my biggest fear is not being the best person I can for them, right? I've got five kids and four of them are girls.

• 28:07Lewis Howes?

  Wow.

• 28:07Speaker 01

  And so there's just this massive responsibility. I want to create or help influence these girls to be tough individuals that can handle their own. I mean, it's tough out there, especially for women. I mean, it's a dogfight and I want them to have resilience and to be tough and to be confident with who they are and to be themselves. And so I think one of my biggest fears is letting them down. And letting my wife down because she does such an unbelievable job with the kids. And she's very present. We have a high, hold a high value on her being home. She wants to be a mom and be really engaged with these kids. And as do I, but I also have to provide and so that includes some travel.

• 28:49Speaker 01

  But I think, I think one of our biggest fears is not doing everything I can to give them a shot at being successful. Allowing them to suffer and struggle and giving them the tools to, to not be complacent or too comfortable. To, to, to push them mentally and physically. Because I think, love this generation, I think they're super powerful. It's the fault of my generation that we're being too soft on these kids and crippling them. And once they, they go away to college, they're like, I don't know, I don't know how to do this on my own. Right? And so I don't wanna, I don't, my fear is I don't wanna put my kids in that situation.

• 29:23Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, your greatest advice so far is to say you wish everyone hits rock bottom.

• 29:26Speaker 01

  Absolutely.

• 29:27Lewis Howes?

  So how do you set that up for your kids where you don't see them suffer?

• 29:30Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 29:31Lewis Howes?

  Cause you just wanna protect them and love them and like just hug them, but you also know.

• 29:35Speaker 01

  To love them at the highest level is to allow them to suffer.

• 29:38Lewis Howes?

  Hmm.

• 29:39Speaker 01

  And to, to not pick them up when they fall, right? That is the greatest show of love. It's super hard to do, cause we want to give them everything. It's hard for people that don't have kids to understand the level of unconditional love or that, that connection you have with, with a child. It's hard, but it's something that I think you need to do. The, the highest show of love is to allow them to, to suffer and to, to learn and grow and adapt.

• 30:04Lewis Howes?

  What's that look like for you as a dad? How do you let your daughters suffer?

• 30:09Speaker 01

  It's so hard. They're in such a, an innocent age range right now. I mean, 15, 14, 12, and 10 are my girls. And, and just to.

• 30:17Lewis Howes?

  They're just suffering in high school already.

• 30:19Speaker 01

  I mean, it's junior high and high school. It's such a transitional, difficult age. It's awkward, it's hard. Kids are ruthless. It's so hard not to be like, ah, I'm mama bear and papa bear here and we're gonna protect you. We just, we just allow them to, we give them guidance. And we just try to steer them and set an example. And I, I love that some of people in our lives are just dumpster fires. Because they're great teaching points for our kids, right? We're like, look, look at this, this, this, this is a path you don't wanna go on, right? And we'll use this as an example. And my kids are like, yeah, I don't want that, you know? And then hopefully we can just guide them and put them in the right spots.

• 30:56Lewis Howes?

  What's the greatest personal struggle you've ever faced?

• 31:01Speaker 01

  Probably just as a husband and father to lose everything. Just the last decade's been really hard on my wife and my kids. They've been so supportive. To go all in and to kind of push all the chips in the pot. It's been super hard to go through that. And I think that's part of the reason why I succeeded. Because I put these guys through so much.

• 31:23Lewis Howes?

  You had to complete it.

• 31:24Speaker 01

  I had to complete it. Like, I remember laying on the side of the road on day thirty just in tears. And I was just like, it's just twenty more days. Figure out how to be perfect a minute at a time. And let go of everything. It's okay to be selfish for the next twenty days. Because if you're not, the last decade was a complete waste. And you're gonna have to restart over. And then now, how much more sacrifice is gonna be, right?

• 31:48Lewis Howes?

  Oh my gosh.

• 31:49Speaker 01

  And so it's like you start to put moments into perspective. And that moment of me laying on the side of the road was probably eight minutes, right? It was an eight-minute intense conversation with myself where I was just like... It's like you hear when you die, everything is gonna like flash through. And you're gonna see your whole life. In those eight minutes, everything that we'd done and sacrificed at that point kind of like rushed through. And I had to make a decision. What am I gonna do? And what does it look like in the next twenty days? And how? How do we conceptualize and make that like breakthrough to get to that next point?

• 32:28Lewis Howes?

  At hour seven on thirty days or twenty days in. Hour seven of the day. Biking, running, whatever it is. What are you thinking about for those long stretches? When it's just you on the road and maybe no one's around, no one's cheering at you? What do you think about to just get through the next hour or the whole day? What's the conversation you're having or not having?

• 32:55Speaker 01

  Yeah, definitely the conversation you're having. Seven hours into a fourteen-hour day. You're halfway maybe, especially in a journey where it's seven weeks long. Before you start counting down, you're at race twenty, you're not even halfway. And so those conversations are intense, right? You can think of a million reasons to stop moving. But I think that was one of the coolest things that I got to experience on the fifty was those long conversations I got to have with myself. I think it was one of the most incredible byproducts that happened to me. And I think people are so distracted and with everything that's going on, we've missed an opportunity to sit down and talk to ourselves and to self-reflect. When was the last time anybody asked themselves who they wanted to be? When was the last time anybody asked themselves, have I forgiven myself for my past?

• 33:40Speaker 01

  Right? Am I still carrying burdens? Am I still having conversations in my head from a decade ago? Why don't we replace that energy with something else, right? And so I think for me, and out of the 50 I got to have, every conversation. I mean, I had 50 really long conversations with myself. I got to forgive myself for everything in the past. I got to plan my entire future. And now I get to continue to try to be the best version of myself. I'm not, I'm not perfect. I struggle every single day like everybody else. But I just try to wake up. I try to put my feet on the ground and I just try to go to work.

• 34:11Lewis Howes?

  Wow.

• 34:12Speaker 01

  And I think that, I think if people can just, in those conversations, I wasn't thinking, what's tomorrow gonna look like? What's the run gonna look like tonight? I'm worried about being perfect for the next 60 seconds. Right? To get through those last 20, I was, it was literally 60-second periods. And if I could put together a perfect 60 seconds, I had a shot at putting together a perfect hour. If I had a perfect hour, I could put together a perfect day. If I had a perfect day, I could put together a perfect 20. That's how I got through. But in those moments, I was never thinking, I'd gone through the entire thought process in the first 30 days.

• 34:46Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 34:46Speaker 01

  And now it was, okay. Now, now you're the Iron Cowboy. Now, this is, this is a rebirth, this is an alter ego. And when I put on my glasses, I was the Iron Cowboy. It wasn't James Lawrence. I was the Iron Cowboy. And that dude's a bad, bad man, right? And so as people, we need to figure out what our alter ego is. Because when things get the most difficult, we're backed into a corner, what are you gonna do? What's your superpower? What, what's your, who is that person that's gonna do it? And that's, that's who the Iron Cowboy is. That's who that dude is. He's the guy that, he's been backed into a corner and he's, he's gotta be selfish for a minute. So that he can take care of everything in that moment that'll open up. And you gotta take care of yourself before you can take care of anybody else.

• 35:30Speaker 01

  So for those 20, I had to become the Iron Cowboy so that I could take care of my family the rest of my life.

• 35:33Lewis Howes?

  The last 20. Yeah, the last 20. Was the conversations you were having more about forgiveness or the future that you wanted to create?

• 35:43Speaker 01

  I think you need a healthy balance of both. You have to forgive yourself in order to progress, right? And so that's gotta be step number one.

• 35:51Lewis Howes?

  Right.

• 35:52Speaker 01

  Forgiveness.

• 35:53Lewis Howes?

  What was the hardest thing you had?

• 35:54Speaker 01

  You have to have a short-term memory too.

• 35:55Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 35:56Speaker 01

  You have a short-term memory and be okay with.

• 35:58Lewis Howes?

  Not holding on to something?

• 35:59Speaker 01

  Not holding on. Real quick, one of the best, one of the best books that I've read is Eckhart Tolle. It's all about ego and the conversations that you're having with yourself that nobody else is having. And you're just beating yourself up and just, we need to, you know, deal it, replace it, get out and move on, right? One of the biggest, toughest things I had to forgive myself for? I think just, just putting my, my family through what we did and it wasn't my fault, but when we lost everything, I took that personally. Right? That was a huge responsibility for me. We had five little, little kids, right? And the decisions I made after that, they were on me. And it was just really hard, even though it wasn't a mistake and I don't, I don't regret it, it's put us where we are today.

• 36:38Speaker 01

  It was just hard for, to forgive myself for, and my kids didn't know any different. My wife did an unbelievable job, but it's more, it's more for, for my wife Sunny. Forgiving myself for putting her through that. And, but we're ultimate support for each other and so.

• 36:51Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 36:52Speaker 01

  It's still something that I struggle with because I want to give her everything, right? And so that's why I'm working so hard today and we're building a house now and we've got some stability, which is great.

• 37:02Lewis Howes?

  That's good. You gotta let her suffer, you said. A little bit of suffering.

• 37:06Speaker 01

  That's true.

• 37:07Lewis Howes?

  A little bit of suffering.

• 37:08Speaker 01

  I'm not the guy to teach her lessons though.

• 37:10Lewis Howes?

  Exactly, yeah.

• 37:11Speaker 01

  That's not my job, yeah.

• 37:13Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, you teach your daughter's lessons.

• 37:14Speaker 01

  That's right. That's my job.

• 37:15Lewis Howes?

  That's your job. Now, it's interesting you talk about the, the alter ego because do you think you would have been able to complete it without an alter ego?

• 37:23Speaker 01

  No.

• 37:24Lewis Howes?

  Why not?

• 37:25Speaker 01

  Well, because we're. We're all human, right?

• 37:29Lewis Howes?

  We're too weak.

• 37:29Speaker 01

  We're too weak. Our alter ego is the superpower part of who we are, right? It's the perfect model of our imperfection. And without an alter ego, in those most difficult situations, you hear these incredible stories of survival, life and death, someone's able to do a heroic thing, right? That's their alter ego coming out in a life or death. They've been backed so far into a corner that their alter ego has to come out, right? And so I think everybody needs to find that alter ego. Because if you're on a journey and you're truly trying to progress and have impact and do really cool things and just grow as a person, there's gonna be a moment where you're laying on the side of the road and you need your alter ego to kind of bust through and do that.

• 38:11Speaker 01

  But again, it goes back to you can't develop the alter ego unless you intentionally put yourself in situations and do difficult things and sharpen that mental toolbox, right? So it all goes all the way back to doing difficult things and not being stuck so that you can develop the alter ego. So when you've put yourself in a situation, you're backed into a corner and the world's against you, is that person there and ready to take on that moment?

• 38:36Lewis Howes?

  Wow. So when did you develop the Iron Cowboy as your alter ego?

• 38:39Speaker 01

  It became a brand in 2012 during the world record. I would wear a cowboy hat during the marathon portion so my kids could see me coming. And they get to pick my colorful cowboy hats. And it's a family kid thing that was great, right? It was a brand, on day 30 is when it actually became the alter ego, when I had sharpened that toolbox enough. And the Iron Cowboy is just symbolic of the alter ego, right? But I truly believe that on day 30 in Connecticut on the side of the road, it was that rebirth. And that the real Iron Cowboy was born in that day. And on that day in Connecticut for the next 20 days, that was the highest level of showcasing the Iron Cowboy.

• 39:18Lewis Howes?

  Really? Where does your mind go when you turn on the switch? How does it know when to connect the switch to? I'm James, just like starting out the Ironman, like four hours into, this is getting really fricking tough. I can't allow weakness to take over my mind right now, so I'm flipping the switch to the ego.

• 39:37Speaker 01

  Yeah, I don't think it's a flip that you consciously switch. I think it's almost fight or flight. And once you get good at it and practice it, you don't define or see the moment as, okay, I need to flip it.

• 39:51Lewis Howes?

  You're just in the zone.

• 39:52Speaker 01

  It just transitions and next thing you know, boom, I'm in it and I'm doing it. That's what I talked about earlier, when the mind and the body come into sync with each other, right? That's a special place. It's like anything else, you have to practice that and get it. And people are like, how do I flip a switch? I'm like, you just gotta practice it and it's just going to happen. And you'll know when it happens and you'll be the baddest person on the planet.

• 40:16Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, you'll believe that nothing can stop you.

• 40:19Speaker 01

  Nothing can stop you. And during those 20 days, it was going to take an act of God to stop us.

• 40:26Lewis Howes?

  Good thing it didn't. Now, how much resistance training or mental toughness training or just pushing through the pain constantly, do you think it took for you in order for that to come out? Where you defined like this alter ego? How many years of training?

• 40:43Speaker 01

  Yeah, how many years? You know, I truly believe that it was over two decades.

• 40:47Lewis Howes?

  Hmm, before the alter ego came?

• 40:49Speaker 01

  For sure.

• 40:49Lewis Howes?

  So you were just a human?

• 40:51Speaker 01

  I'm still just a human.

• 40:52Lewis Howes?

  But you were just a human training the whole time?

• 40:55Speaker 01

  For sure. I grew up wrestling. Did six plus years of just intense, that was everything I did. And I learned a ton physically, but mentally, how to overcome that. I mean, I was a horrible wrestler when I first started and then went undefeated in my senior year. And so just learned a ton. I tell a fun story in the book about a contest in Calgary where the Calgary Stampede, that's where I grew up. There was a contest to see who could ride the giant Ferris wheel for the 10-day stampede. And it was in those 10 days that their goal was absolute boredom. You couldn't do anything on the ride. 10 days on a giant Ferris wheel. Never leaving. You had two 10 minute breaks. Oh my gosh. And so I learned a ton about myself mentally in those 10 days. Wait, you did this? Yeah. For 10 days? Correct. For two 10 minute breaks?

• 41:40Speaker 01

  A day, yeah. A day, gotcha. Yeah, two 10 minute breaks a day, yeah, for 10 days. To go to the bathroom or something, or? Right, and eat food. Because you couldn't eat on the ride. So you had to go to the bathroom and eat food, two 10 minute breaks. Shut up. So I learned a ton. You slept on it? Yeah. Oh my gosh. They'd stop it at night and you'd sleep. And so I learned during those 10 days, I was like, look, I've been sharpening a mental toolbox for my whole wrestling career. Now, I really honed in on this, and that was a special 10 days. That's kind of where I transitioned. I had one friend in Utah. I'd won some money, I got fired from my job. And so I hitchhiked a ride and had one friend in Utah. Ended up meeting my wife and still live there 19 years later.

• 42:21Speaker 01

  But that was a massive turning point for me, but it was not only a pivot in my life that changed the direction. It was the first early signs that, look, you've got control of your mind. Let's... Mmm. Last night, Rich Roll posed the question. Are you born with it, or can you develop it? Right? And we're talking about- What specifically? Mentally, mentally tough. Mental toughness. So are you born with it? Is it innate, or can you develop it? I think everybody's born with a certain amount, right? We all have different talents. But you can have the most talented person in the world that doesn't develop it, and they're useless. It's not a skill that they have. And you can take someone who has a small bit of genetic talent in a category, and work their tails off. Right?

• 43:05Speaker 01

  There was a kid growing up wrestling, and he was horrible. Horrible wrestler. And I was like, this kid is never going to amount to anything. And he just had the smallest amount of talent. He showed up and outworked everybody. And I came back to the club years later, and he won the national championship. Wow. National championship. There was no way I would ever have said that this kid was going to... If you have- A work ethic, you can overcome talent. Now, the perfect storm and the people that are at the highest level, you've got talent and work ethic, right?

• 43:36Lewis Howes?

  LeBron James.

• 43:36Speaker 01

  Well, that guy is a genetic freak.

• 43:39Lewis Howes?

  He's a genetic freak, but he works.

• 43:40Speaker 01

  But he works hard.

• 43:41Lewis Howes?

  So hard.

• 43:41Speaker 01

  And he understands the principle. He is a guy, Simone Biles, Shaquille O'Neal, Michael Phelps, LeBron James, Michael Jordan, all these guys, born with talent, were put in a situation.

• 43:51Lewis Howes?

  And worked harder than everyone else.

• 43:53Speaker 01

  And worked harder than everybody else. That's the perfect storm, that's your superstar, that's your Conor McGregor, you know, these are these icons that have changed and transcended their sport, right? Gift plus hard work. But, same thing, you take a guy with a gift that doesn't know how to work hard? Useless. You take a guy that has little talent and can work hard? He can turn into something special.

• 44:11Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, he can.

• 44:12Speaker 01

  I believe I fall into that category.

• 44:13Lewis Howes?

  Mm-hmm.

• 44:14Speaker 01

  I crossed the finish line and they were like, "You're gifted, you're special." And I'm like, "Dude, I'm not, I'm normal." And they're like, "No, we're gonna test you." And they put me through a series of tests and they came back and I was a normal white dude, right?

• 44:24Lewis Howes?

  Right, right.

• 44:25Speaker 01

  But what they couldn't test was my mind, my strength, my power, my ability to show up every single day. I love Conor McGregor, he's quoted as saying, "You're not looking at talent, you're looking at obsession." Our group was talented, I mean, obsessed, on what we were trying to do. And we showed up every single day. Conor McGregor, I love MMA, when he, after he won the title, he said, "Doubt me now." Put your feet on the ground, wake up every single day and say, "Doubt me now." You don't have to know how you're getting to your destination, you don't know how you're... Put your feet on the ground and say, "Put on your glasses and say, 'Doubt me now.'" And just go to work. Hard work can be talent when talent doesn't work hard, right?

• 45:01Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 45:01Speaker 01

  And I find myself in that situation.

• 45:03Lewis Howes?

  Do you feel like you've done certain things to prove to people? Anything?

• 45:10Speaker 01

  I don't care what anybody says, thinks anymore.

• 45:13Lewis Howes?

  But growing up, did you, you know, was this a thing where you needed to prove someone wrong or to prove...

• 45:19Speaker 01

  Day 30... Day thirty is when I had a massive shift. It was the moment I stopped trying to prove everybody else wrong. And I started to prove myself right.

• 45:29Lewis Howes?

  Hmm.

• 45:29Speaker 01

  Right?

• 45:30Lewis Howes?

  That's the key.

• 45:31Speaker 01

  Once I let everything go. And focused on what I was doing. And I was like, look, dude, I don't care what your agenda is, because it doesn't matter. I'm here to prove myself right. I'm here to prove that when I reach my mental and physical limits. What's the Iron Cowboy gonna do? That's what I wanted to do. That's what this whole journey was about. What am I gonna do when I'm backed into a corner? And I could have walked up and gone home. Day thirty. But what am I gonna do? Am I gonna do what I say I'm gonna do? Am I gonna get up and do twenty more? Right? Soon as I stopped trying to prove everybody else wrong, prove myself right, boom, everything changed.

• 46:03Lewis Howes?

  How did it feel after that?

• 46:04Speaker 01

  Dude, unbelievable.

• 46:05Lewis Howes?

  Did you, you said you were at your faster times at the end too?

• 46:08Speaker 01

  Last twenty.

• 46:09Lewis Howes?

  Did you feel relaxed and less stressed?

• 46:11Speaker 01

  Less stressed. I stopped focusing on everything that I couldn't control. I allowed my team to be the role players they were supposed to be. Handle your business. Handle your business right now and let the team you've assembled handle their jobs. That's when it works. Right? Stop trying to do everybody else's job. Own your space. Trust the people around you. Let that go. Stop focusing and worrying about it. Put all the energy into the next sixty seconds to be perfect. Right? That was that moment that mind-body came into alignment.

• 46:40Lewis Howes?

  Wow. When did you realize that? What was the trigger for you to think that way? That you don't need to prove anyone wrong anymore?

• 46:47Speaker 01

  Laying there on the side of the road, focusing on all the negativity in social media, that just the backlash that we were getting, decisions we were making. Dude, you don't have the right to criticize what I'm doing until you've done thirty consecutive, consecutive Ironmans, right? Till you're in that position. Only then will I allow you to criticize.

• 47:04Lewis Howes?

  Share some feedback.

• 47:05Speaker 01

  Share some feedback, right? Do something even close, then criticize me, right? You know, the famous quote, "Don't judge a man unless you've walked a mile in his shoes." Don't judge me unless you've done thirty consecutive Ironmans. Now we can start to have a conversation, right? Decisions that I make are decisions that I'm making for the best cause. The documentary we have, it just came out on Amazon Prime. It's free if you're part of there. The Story of the Fifty. And people will get a good insight of really what we were dealing with behind the scenes.

• 47:31Lewis Howes?

  So you had a film crew the whole time too?

• 47:32Speaker 01

  Yeah. Yeah, we had a film crew there. And then if you're not Amazon Prime, pony up five bucks and watch it on Vimeo. It's available there too. And then, of course, we have the book, Redefine the Possible, that kind of dives into all the behind the scenes and the incredible people we met along the way, so.

• 47:46Lewis Howes?

  Wow.

• 47:47Speaker 01

  Yeah, what a crazy.

• 47:48Lewis Howes?

  Do you think if you didn't have that breakdown, like? On the road for those eight minutes, they'd still be trying to prove people wrong?

• 47:55Speaker 01

  Yeah, I think so. I needed to learn that lesson. I needed to have that mind shift. I needed to let go. I needed to to allow the wingman, to allow Sonny, to allow my kids to be who they are. And trust is one of the biggest things I learned was was trust. Trust what you've put together. Trust the journey you're on. Trust your intuition. Trust your gut. Look dude, it doesn't matter what other people are thinking. That's their agenda. That's their opinion. You're not going to change people's minds. You've got to do you, right? And as soon as I was like, no dude, I'm here for my family. I'm here for this. Everything changed. I let go and started focusing on the right things instead of trying to control the things I couldn't control.

• 48:33Lewis Howes?

  It's funny for until about four years ago, and I talk about this on my show. I was always doing things subconsciously to prove people wrong about me. They said I wouldn't be able to do something and I was like, let me show you. And I would have this alter ego of putting myself through so much pain just to prove like a few kids wrong about me. Or to prove like a teacher or a coach or whatever may be wrong about me. And I would be willing to sacrifice anything to prove them wrong. Anything for years.

• 49:03Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 49:04Lewis Howes?

  And I would get big results. I would achieve all those goals and prove them wrong and be miserable and unhappy. And I was like, why am I so unhappy and ungrateful for what I just achieved? I was like, well, I guess I just need a bigger dream to go after now.

• 49:17Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 49:18Lewis Howes?

  And I would do that for another five years and achieve that dream. I'd be like, why am I still not happy? And it wasn't until I realized, until I hit about 30 years old, I was like, man, I've been living my life trying to prove everyone wrong. And it got me to where I'm at, which was some big results, but also a lot of suffering and pain that was unnecessary.

• 49:35Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 49:36Lewis Howes?

  When I finally said, you know what? I'm going to do things because I love it and I want to lift others up. That's when everything started.

• 49:43Speaker 01

  Your motivation changed.

• 49:44Lewis Howes?

  Everything shifted and I had just as much passion, just as much energy without the stress and the overwhelm. And so I love what you talked about. Which was, let's prove people right, let's lift people up, and not listen to the negative thoughts of people saying what you can't accept.

• 49:57Speaker 01

  You're not gonna change those negative people.

• 49:59Lewis Howes?

  No.

• 49:59Speaker 01

  They are who they are, they're on a different journey, they're not open. And so, why not shift our focus and attention to things that thrive? And that have, like, I wanna talk to people that are vibrating the same way that I'm vibrating, right? And I wanna bring those people up and, and, when you wanna get on board with this train, come on board, cuz it's a lot of fun over here and you can, you can hang out with all y'all miserables over there. And you do you, I'm gonna do me, and we're gonna have a good time doing it. And like, like you said in the experience that you had, everything shifts. When you start doing things and doing them for the right reasons, right? Everything kinda just falls into place.

• 50:32Lewis Howes?

  What's your mental routine on a daily basis? Is there certain practices you go through? Is there a reading, is there prayer, is there meditation? Or something you think about to train your mind every day still?

• 50:44Speaker 01

  I get this question a lot and I should maybe come up with a very specific routine.

• 50:47Lewis Howes?

  Process?

• 50:48Speaker 01

  Yeah, but with, I mean, life has just been so, so chaotic. I mean, last year I was in thirty countries, a lot of airplanes, a lot of hotels, a lot of in and out. Trying to get into a routine was difficult. One thing that's been constant is, we're a religious family. And so, to, to have a faith and to have family, those have been the main constants for us, right? So just waking up every day and being grateful. That's been the biggest catalyst for me is, it's difficult for me every day and I, and I struggle. But to, to wake up every day and try to be present and try to be grateful and focus on those things, that's my routine, right? And as soon as I, I start, the energy starts to get bad and whatnot, it's because I'm focusing on the wrong things.

• 51:29Speaker 01

  I'm trying to do for other people and prove them wrong and for different reasons. Soon as I get re-centered back, my wife's great at kinda bringing me back and calling me on the carpet. But when we get back to that, that spot of gratitude and, and look. Anything we send out, I mean, I'm huge on putting it out there, doing the work, and it'll come back to you. When things are going bad, it's because I'm focusing and sending out just this bad energy. And as soon as I read, the reason the 50 was so successful, I was 100, 200, 300% all in. You could not convince me that it wasn't possible. And I need to put that in all areas of my life and just trust that our gut feelings and our hard work and everything is going to put us exactly where we need to be.

• 52:14Speaker 01

  And we're going to track the things when they need to happen and just go forward with that faith and the belief. And so for me, just waking up and being consistent, my routine is when I'm grounded, when I'm around my family and I'm grateful and mindful of that, that's my routine. And everything else just falls into place.

• 52:31Lewis Howes?

  Gratitude is the key, man. Gratitude is the key. This is a question that I ask everyone at the end. It's called the three truths.

• 52:37Speaker 01

  Oh, boy.

• 52:38Lewis Howes?

  And so imagine this is your last day, many years from now, you get to choose the day that you're done on this earth for all that you know, right? And it could be 100, it could be 200, it doesn't matter. You picked a day, but you gotta pick a day and it's it. And you've created incredible things, right? You've written tons of books, you're speaking all over the place, you've done everything you wanted to create, all your dreams have come true. But for whatever reason, you've got to take everything with you. And so no one has access to any of your information anymore. But you have all your family, friends there, it's a celebration, you're about to say goodbye, and they give you a piece of paper. And they say, we want you to write down the three biggest truths that you know about everything you've learned from life.

• 53:19Lewis Howes?

  The lessons that you would pass on to us in the world, and this is all we would have of your information. So you get to write down three things. What would be your three truths?

• 53:29Speaker 01

  Man, these are probably going to be things that I really struggle with, that I work on. So we just covered one of them, gratitude. Gratitude is the catalyst to everything, right? It's how we vibrate. I wish I was more playful and present. And a lot of these are probably real common answers that people have. And as I get older, they will probably change, right? Be grateful, be more lighthearted, and be present. Just stop.

• 53:56Speaker 01

  Stop worrying about the small things. They're just a distraction. In the, in the big picture, ninety-nine percent of everything doesn't matter. It just, it just doesn't matter. And so, yeah, I guess that's it.

• 54:09Lewis Howes?

  Would you say you're not a very playful person?

• 54:12Speaker 01

  It's surprising, I'm probably more of an introvert. My wife is super playful, right? And I watch her and I'm like, I'm kind of envious of, of that. And I, I'm just, like, I'm not, I'm not the type of person to get up and dance on a dance floor and whatnot. I'm just like, I'd rather just observe and, and watch and kind of be the back of the room. Which is very bizarre because my onstage persona, and people would never, never assume that. Which is kind of my alter ego, right? That, that has to come out in order to have, to have the impact that we want to have. My authentic self is a playful person. And I think it's been lost along the way because of the experiences and the loss and

• 54:46Lewis Howes?

  Hardening yourself and training everything.

• 54:47Speaker 01

  Hardening myself and the social responsibility that I have to be the iron cowboy, right? There's, there's that whole aspect of it too that we never talked about. Just some kind of the social pressures and when you show up somewhere and you're expected to be

• 54:59Lewis Howes?

  You gotta wear the beard, you gotta be tough, you gotta have the persona you gotta be.

• 55:02Speaker 01

  Absolutely, and all of that. And so, it's almost where you're like, I'm not allowed to be playful. I have to be the badass, right?

• 55:09Lewis Howes?

  Says who?

• 55:10Speaker 01

  Exactly, right? Who am I trying to, who do I try to, who do I try to

• 55:13Lewis Howes?

  Says who?

• 55:13Speaker 01

  Yeah, this has been, this has been a great, a great little, little conclusion. Yeah, I love that.

• 55:17Lewis Howes?

  I'm gonna give you a challenge then.

• 55:18Speaker 01

  Yeah, let's do it.

• 55:19Lewis Howes?

  If you accept, if you choose to accept, for the next thirty days in a row, you have to do a sixty-second dance party. Every single day.

• 55:30Speaker 01

  Can I be just by myself?

• 55:32Lewis Howes?

  With someone else.

• 55:33Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 55:33Lewis Howes?

  And every time you're at home, it has to be with someone in your family. Your kids, your wife.

• 55:39Speaker 01

  I will do this.

• 55:40Lewis Howes?

  And you get to film part of it.

• 55:42Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 55:43Lewis Howes?

  Thirty days in a row.

• 55:44Speaker 01

  All right.

• 55:45Lewis Howes?

  With a friend, it could be strangers in the street, you're speaking onstage. You get everyone to dance for sixty seconds as a challenge to yourself to be more playful.

• 55:52Speaker 01

  Okay, okay.

• 55:52Lewis Howes?

  If this is your truth.

• 55:53Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 55:54Lewis Howes?

  Then I'm gonna challenge you. Do you accept or no?

• 55:56Speaker 01

  I accept.

• 55:57Lewis Howes?

  You accept, thirty days.

• 55:58Speaker 01

  Thirty days.

• 55:58Lewis Howes?

  Thirty days, all right. You're gonna text me.

• 56:00Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 56:01Lewis Howes?

  At the end of thirty days.

• 56:02Speaker 01

  Perfect.

• 56:02Lewis Howes?

  And let me know that you've completed all thirty.

• 56:04Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 56:05Lewis Howes?

  And if you didn't complete all thirty, if you miss a day, what's the, uh, the consequence for you? What's the stake?

• 56:11Speaker 01

  Man. That's a good one.

• 56:15Lewis Howes?

  60 seconds.

• 56:16Speaker 01

  60 seconds.

• 56:16Lewis Howes?

  60 seconds. You know anything for 60 seconds.

• 56:18Speaker 01

  Exactly. I talk about the perfect minute.

• 56:20Lewis Howes?

  That's it.

• 56:20Speaker 01

  This will be fun. What's the steak? You'll have to tell me. I'll do whatever.

• 56:24Lewis Howes?

  We'll figure it out. We'll figure it out. Okay. You'll have to do a thousand pushups.

• 56:29Speaker 01

  Oh, girls.

• 56:30Lewis Howes?

  A day. Each time you miss a day.

• 56:33Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 56:34Lewis Howes?

  A thousand pushups.

• 56:35Speaker 01

  I'll do that.

• 56:36Lewis Howes?

  Have you ever done a thousand pushups in a day?

• 56:37Speaker 01

  I have, yeah.

• 56:38Lewis Howes?

  It'd probably take you so long.

• 56:39Speaker 01

  It does. It takes a long time. It takes a couple hours. I remember doing it with a couple of my wrestling buddies. We put on a movie and we would just do sets of 10 pushups until we hit 1,000.

• 56:47Lewis Howes?

  It would take like two hours.

• 56:49Speaker 01

  It takes a couple hours.

• 56:50Lewis Howes?

  So you have to do a thousand pushups if you miss a 60-second dance party every day.

• 56:53Speaker 01

  Done.

• 56:54Lewis Howes?

  For 30 days. You have to videotape them too.

• 56:57Speaker 01

  Done.

• 56:57Lewis Howes?

  Should document it. Okay, perfect. Are there any questions you have for me before I ask the final couple of questions?

• 57:02Speaker 01

  No.

• 57:03Lewis Howes?

  Okay. Well, make sure you guys get this book. It's called Iron Cowboy: Redefine Impossible. The story of 50 Ironman triathlons in 50 days in 50 different states. There's also a documentary called The 50.

• 57:17Speaker 01

  The Story of the 50.

• 57:18Lewis Howes?

  The Story of the 50 on Amazon right now. You're on social media.

• 57:22Speaker 01

  Iron Cowboy James.

• 57:23Lewis Howes?

  Iron Cowboy James on all places on social media. Where do you hang out the most?

• 57:27Speaker 01

  Instagram.

• 57:28Lewis Howes?

  Instagram?

• 57:29Speaker 01

  Yep.

• 57:29Lewis Howes?

  Before I ask the final question, I want to acknowledge you for a moment, James, for being a symbol of inspiration to so many people. Because there's not many people who are willing to put themselves through that much pain in order to complete a vision for their life in that short amount of time. And to do something so audacious in the mind that everyone seems is crazy, but you know is possible, and to do it eventually for yourself and not for anyone else, I think is an incredible inspiration that you learned the process and the lesson of doing it for yourself or for your family, not to prove people wrong in the community. Also, I want to acknowledge you for your playfulness. Because I believe when you are playful and you bring out your heart,

• 58:14Lewis Howes?

  that's when you're going to impact even more people.

• 58:16Speaker 01

  For sure.

• 58:17Lewis Howes?

  So stepping out of the alter ego as much as you can when you're around other humans and giving us your heart, that's what's going to be mind-blowing and the most inspirational things. But I want to acknowledge you for that and for being so open today and sharing. Is there any question you wish more people would ask you that they haven't?

• 58:37Speaker 01

  I have never had that question. Man, I think people have really asked a lot of questions. Again, I'm a more private person than anything else, and so I tend not to think of what else can people ask me?

• 58:47Lewis Howes?

  Right.

• 58:48Speaker 01

  Right.

• 58:48Lewis Howes?

  What's the thing that would help everyone listening or watching right now that we haven't shared? That could really help move people forward in their life in some way?

• 58:58Speaker 01

  Forgiveness, whether it's with you or other people, and stop having those negative conversations with yourself. They're hypothetical, right? And they're holding us back. And so I think if people can have those quick conversations and, again, forgive and move forward and be lighthearted.

• 59:15Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 59:15Speaker 01

  That's gonna kind of be the key.

• 59:17Lewis Howes?

  Awesome. Okay, final question. What's your definition of greatness?

• 59:21Speaker 01

  What's my definition of greatness? For me right now, in the space of my life, it's being an example to my kids. I don't want to be remembered for the 50. I want to be remembered for being a dad. And it's cliche, but my kids are young and they're in an impactful part of the year, so greatness to me is having my kids, me being a hero to my kids.

• 59:44Lewis Howes?

  Love it. James, thank you, man. Appreciate it.

• 59:46Speaker 01

  You bet. Thank you.

• 59:46Lewis Howes?

  It's great.

• 59:52Lewis Howes?

  There you have it, my friends. Do you feel like you're becoming more superhuman and like you can achieve the impossible already after this interview? For me, I feel like I can, and I've already agreed to take on an extreme activity that I would never probably do after listening to James. For me, he's inspiring me to get out of my comfort zone even more, because I push myself hard. I train hard, but I do it in the way that I want to, right? I put myself through pain in the ways that I want to, and now's the time to challenge myself in other ways and types of pain that I don't want to, right? Types of endurance events that I'm not excited about, but I'm gonna do one because he inspired me.

• 1:00:33Lewis Howes?

  So let me know what you guys thought of this episode. Again, lewishouse.com/653

• 1:00:41Lewis Howes?

  Share on Instagram @lewishouse. All the show notes, the links, the book, the full video interview is back at our website as well at lewishouse.com. And if you haven't signed up for one of our books, we've got The Mask of Masculinity, The School of Greatness book. We've got so many incredible programs, books, products. Go check out lewishouse.com for anything else that you may be interested in. I love you guys so very much. And as Maya Angelou said, "You may encounter many defeats, but you must not be defeated." In fact, it may be necessary to encounter the defeats. So you can know who you are, what you can rise from, how you can still come out of it. I love you. You know what time it is. It's time to go out there and do something great.