Hunter S. Thompson Was A Warlock | FILE_13 | Mystery Boys

Duncan Trussell Tour: ⁠https://www.duncantrussell.com/tour⁠ Kurt Metzger Live Shows: ⁠https://punchup.live/kurtmetzger⁠ SPONSORS: For a limited time, our listeners get 50% off FOR LIFE, Free Shipping, AND 3 Free Gifts at Mars Men at https://Mengotomars.com. Save 20% on your first online Lucy order at https://lucy.co/MYSTERYBOYS with promo code MYSTERYBOYS! Right now, when you buy two months of BlueChew Gold, you get the third for FREE with promo code MYSTERY. Visit https://BlueChew.com for more details and important safety information Welcome to Mystery Boys, the podcast from YMH Studios hosted by Kurt Metzger and Duncan Trussell. In this supersized double FILE, the boys kick things off with a round of AI True or Fake, testing Duncan's deepfake detection skills on suspiciously real clips of Andrew Tate, Bill Gates, Sir Elton John, and more, before paying a heartfelt tribute to MKUltra complete with star-studded celebrity thank-yous and an original lullaby. Then the investigation goes fully off the rails: Coca-Cola's legal cocaine empire, Trump's golden statue and the Seven Mountains mandate, Madame Blavatsky and the UN's black cube meditation altar, Jeffrey Epstein's occult chessboard, Gene Roddenberry channeling the Council of Nine, aliens as Asian time travelers, and the deeply disturbing evidence that Hunter S. Thompson was a warlock. This is not a conspiracy podcast. This is a mystery appreciation podcast. Mystery Boys Ep. 13 https://www.instagram.com/duncantrussell https://www.instagram.com/kurtmetzgercomedy https://www.instagram.com/mysteryboyspodcast https://store.ymhstudios.com Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:10:02 - AI Clips: True Or Fake? 00:49:00 - A Star-Studded MKUltra Tribute 01:13:15 - Coca-Cola's Legal Cocaine Empire 01:17:50 - Trump's Golden Statue & The Seven Mountains Mandate 01:23:05 - Madame Blavatsky & The UN's Black Cube Altar 01:43:50 - Gene Roddenberry Channels The Council Of Nine 01:55:50 - Jeffrey Epstein's Occult Chessboard 02:19:40 - Aliens Are Asian Time Travelers 02:24:10 - Hunter S. Thompson Was A Warlock Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:24Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, hello. I didn't see you there. I'm Kyrps Mebskers. And you're at a very, very special Mystery Boys must-see special event. This is the first episode of Mystery Boys ever recorded, which we did, we've already recorded it, but it's in the future, you understand. And also, the last episode that we ever did the Mystery Boys in the future, which we filmed a while ago. We're gonna show them back to back. Duncan, as you know, is dead. If you're watching this in the future, but this is pre-recorded.

• 1:07Kurt Metzger?

  But before we get into all that, I got some housekeeping. Shout out to the Museum of Taro for getting me my aura goggles that PayPal sent to my wrong address from two addresses ago. Because one of Duncan's things that he would have really loved if he could have still been a living, breathing person would be to use these aura goggles. I know that much.

• 1:30Kurt Metzger?

  Oh shit, who's that? Hey!

• 1:32Duncan Trussell?

  Sorry I'm late, man.

• 1:36Kurt Metzger?

  Whoa, you're alive?

• 1:38Duncan Trussell?

  What? Yeah.

• 1:39Kurt Metzger?

  We don't have to redo the, I'm not redoing the intro of this. Okay.

• 1:43Duncan Trussell?

  Don't.

• 1:43Kurt Metzger?

  We're showing the first and last episode.

• 1:46Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, great. What's up, y'all?

• 1:49Kurt Metzger?

  Just hold the fuck-

• 1:50Duncan Trussell?

  Peace in the Middle East.

• 1:52Kurt Metzger?

  Let me just check your aura real quick.

• 1:54Duncan Trussell?

  Do I have one still?

• 1:56Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, inconclusive in this lighting, but we're-

• 2:00Duncan Trussell?

  It's a spray I've been using. When I go squirrel hunting, I spray this shit all over me. It chops my aura.

• 2:06Kurt Metzger?

  Whoa, no shit.

• 2:07Duncan Trussell?

  Squirrels see auras.

• 2:10Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, yeah, well, Museum of Taro, they, uh, I don't know the guy, the main guy from Museum of Taro. He's been on Danny Jones, I've been on Danny Jones. I don't think his name is Museum of Taro, but Museum of Taro's girlfriend Laura was very kind on the phone and got me this aura sensing equipment that I had wanted.

• 2:28Duncan Trussell?

  So can you actually see auras through those things?

• 2:30Kurt Metzger?

  I didn't read the instructions. I've just been wearing them and taking pictures.

• 2:34Duncan Trussell?

  Cool as fuck.

• 2:35Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, it makes everything look like Warhammer 40k's Lannish. Um, but I wanted to get them in time for the Hunter Biden thing. I didn't know Hunter Biden was just going to, uh, you know, invite you.

• 2:46Duncan Trussell?

  I'm sorry about that. He didn't invite me. I don't know how I did it up, sitting next to Hunter Biden.

• 2:53Kurt Metzger?

  How'd it go?

• 2:54Duncan Trussell?

  It was really, really fun. Really, really fun, man.

• 2:58Kurt Metzger?

  All right, well, we'll get it on, we'll get all that info on a past episode of Mystery Boys. Right now, we are presenting the very first episode of Mystery Boys. Uh, if you recall, we did that sometime in the future and then, uh, uh, you know, we weren't gonna release the show.

• 3:16Duncan Trussell?

  Which we shouldn't have.

• 3:17Kurt Metzger?

  Which was a mistake, but that's one of those events that's kind of like an anchor in the time stream, which you can't alter, like 9/11.

• 3:24Duncan Trussell?

  Can't be changed, friends.

• 3:25Kurt Metzger?

  Like, uh, Christ's sacrifice or 9/11?

• 3:28Duncan Trussell?

  And this future that we're in right now, it's fucking cool.

• 3:33Kurt Metzger?

  We're in the Baron Stain Bears timeline, as many of you already know. You don't need me to tell you.

• 3:37Duncan Trussell?

  You're gonna love this timeline.

• 3:38Kurt Metzger?

  Then-

• 3:39Duncan Trussell?

  There's gonna be an earthquake in Colombia.

• 3:41Kurt Metzger?

  After this first one, and this first episode has a beautiful tribute to the heroes of MKUltra, which is the CIA, uh, because, uh, uh, it's timely to have it. Now, there is gonna be some awkward parts, I just wanted to let people know.

• 3:53Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 3:54Kurt Metzger?

  Besides Duncan turning out to be alive, which is kind of, honestly, I understand that's weird. Um, besides that, there's a lot of Andrew Tate talk. And by the way, free Andrew Tate. That's the first thing.

• 4:05Duncan Trussell?

  Get him out.

• 4:06Kurt Metzger?

  Get him the hell out of jail.

• 4:08Duncan Trussell?

  The cage bird must fly.

• 4:10Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, and I'm, yeah, I will die on that hill. You're goddamn right I will.

• 4:15Duncan Trussell?

  I'll fucking bleed out on that hill.

• 4:17Kurt Metzger?

  But, uh-

• 4:18Duncan Trussell?

  I'll cough up my guts on that hill.

• 4:21Kurt Metzger?

  It was a star, it was a star center tribute to, uh, MKUltra.

• 4:24Duncan Trussell?

  I'll shit out my fucking heart on that hill. I'll squat down and shit my heart in the hole.

• 4:28Kurt Metzger?

  I know it's Duncan now, because you were blasting aura when you just fucking said that.

• 4:31Duncan Trussell?

  Did you see it?

• 4:32Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, I saw it big time. I was actually about to attack you until I saw that, and I'm glad that you-

• 4:38Duncan Trussell?

  Squirrel spray.

• 4:39Kurt Metzger?

  Thank God Duncan's aura bleeds through. That's probably why I got invited to the Hunter Biden thing.

• 4:42Duncan Trussell?

  You should have been invited. I wanted you there more than anything else, but I got invited to ask him about the finger laces.

• 4:47Kurt Metzger?

  I also, Museum of Taro sent me lenses that I use to scan Tanner's. Tanner, uh, let's look at Tanner's aura real quick before we start the episode.

• 4:55Duncan Trussell?

  Tanner, let's take a look at that aura.

• 4:56Kurt Metzger?

  Put your aura up if you've got nothing to hide. Let's see the pictures. Now, this was taken with, uh, the regular, uh, lens that they send you. I got a whole kit with clips and shit.

• 5:06Duncan Trussell?

  Really?

• 5:07Kurt Metzger?

  Oh yeah, we'll fuck around with it, uh, uh-

• 5:09Duncan Trussell?

  There's different lenses for those?

• 5:11Kurt Metzger?

  Oh yeah, this is, these are, now, these are like hard, that's why you're putting out Mad Riz, because you have to be in the daylight for the, the, okay, so here's a picture I took of Tanner.

• 5:22Duncan Trussell?

  Holy shit.

• 5:23Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, uh, so, so far inconclusive. I'm not seeing his aura, but, uh, let's keep going.

• 5:28Duncan Trussell?

  It's kind of purply chartreuse.

• 5:30Kurt Metzger?

  It looks like goddamn Warhammer 40k, uh, the Warp. Okay, what's next? Let me see another picture of Tanner. Go ahead. Let's see. Oh, there it is.

• 5:40Duncan Trussell?

  What is, well, that's his aura? It looks like skeletal claws.

• 5:45Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, no, that's not his aura. That's what you call an astral parasite, my friend.

• 5:48Duncan Trussell?

  Ah, he's got one of those.

• 5:50Kurt Metzger?

  I wouldn't be surprised, and I'm not saying he's what it is.

• 5:52Duncan Trussell?

  Where's his head? Is he like hiding down behind him? Is he eating his ass?

• 5:56Kurt Metzger?

  Probably tucked inside of Tanner's Filipino, half Filipino body. His, you, you understand, as a half Asian, and Tanner, I think, will agree with me on this. They're very close to those gray head Greta Thunberg aliens, a few generations away.

• 6:11Duncan Trussell?

  Right.

• 6:11Kurt Metzger?

  They're good with tech.

• 6:12Duncan Trussell?

  Yep.

• 6:13Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, they don't grow too, they don't take up too much space.

• 6:15Duncan Trussell?

  Right.

• 6:16Kurt Metzger?

  They love to gamble.

• 6:17Duncan Trussell?

  And make trains. They make great trains.

• 6:21Kurt Metzger?

  That's true. You know what? And I've been there and rode the train, and you're right. Okay, so, there you go, Museum of Taro. Tanner, get that checked out. That is fucking crazy, and let's-

• 6:31Duncan Trussell?

  How do you get that checked out?

• 6:33Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, Ari Shafir will know. He's in town.

• 6:35Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, yeah, because he's a curse victim.

• 6:38Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, he, he held the guinea pig real close to his arms and transferred all his, and it wasn't because of Kobe.

• 6:44Duncan Trussell?

  That's nuts. He gave that guinea pig-

• 6:46Kurt Metzger?

  He caught a stray curse.

• 6:48Duncan Trussell?

  So many, so many venerables.

• 6:50Kurt Metzger?

  Someone's just randomly cursing out the Jews and they-

• 6:52Duncan Trussell?

  That's nuts.

• 6:55Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, me and him together, dude, look like we have a hookah shop that was destroyed in Gaza. Okay, this is the Alpha episode.

• 7:04Duncan Trussell?

  Welcome and goodbye.

• 7:05Kurt Metzger?

  Welcome to the Alpha and Omega of the Mystery Boys. Now, let's strap in for the first episode of Mystery Boys, uh, which we will shoot, uh, later today, which, uh, you will be watching last week.

• 7:18Duncan Trussell?

  See you last week.

• 7:20Kurt Metzger?

  Hi, I'm Kyrpy Medzgarante, and, uh, with me today is-

• 7:25Duncan Trussell?

  Lord Caldrin Brill.

• 7:26Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, and, uh, you, you ca, boy, you came to a great Mystery Boys, I'll tell you that. Uh, first of all, we're gonna talk about MKUltra. Now, you hear a lot of talk about it, but you ain't heard the Mystery Boys get to the bottom of it.

• 7:42Duncan Trussell?

  We are going to dive in to the amazing history of one of the greatest CIA programs to ever happen in the United States of America and other countries.

• 7:52Kurt Metzger?

  You know, Duncan, they say, uh, I'm sorry, what did you say your fake name was?

• 7:56Duncan Trussell?

  Uh, Lord Caldrin Brill.

• 7:58Kurt Metzger?

  You know, Lord Caldrin, uh, they say the West is the best, uh, of hemispheres, but why is it?

• 8:05Duncan Trussell?

  Uh, in industry, the people, the beautiful landscape.

• 8:09Kurt Metzger?

  MKUltra, I would contend, uh, uh, control through chaos, absolutely perfected by the greatest country on earth, America, the land of the plume serpent.

• 8:20Duncan Trussell?

  And also, I do think that in all of the fake news out there and all of the conspiracy bullshit, people who dedicated their lives to the services of this country by trying to understand the human psyche to keep our country safe are thrown under the bus and are decried as being monstrous unethical scientists.

• 8:46Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, or sometimes found under a bridge with their hands cut off.

• 8:49Duncan Trussell?

  Or feet.

• 8:51Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, anyway, we're gonna get to that in just a minute, but first, a really important segment. Uh, when we touch on this, I think last week, even though my memory is quite hazy of what we did last.

• 9:00Duncan Trussell?

  Well, yeah, because we partied. We, uh, we went to the most incredible, we were invited. We're not supposed to say we invited us. We went to an amazing retreat at a ranch. I'll just leave it at that. And, uh, yeah, it's like, I can't remember.

• 9:17Kurt Metzger?

  Ari Lellison, if that helps.

• 9:19Duncan Trussell?

  I can't remember, I remember dancing. Do you remember dancing with that, that, that Kermit the Frog thing?

• 9:28Kurt Metzger?

  Um, no, I, okay. I wa, I don't know if you know, they, it was like, you talking about at the white party? I, I stayed for the brown party. That's like if you're cool.

• 9:40Duncan Trussell?

  That, I don't know if I was, did you see me at the brown party?

• 9:45Kurt Metzger?

  No, you don't see nothing at the brown party, the brown.

• 9:48Duncan Trussell?

  I, I don't know, man. It's a world-

• 9:50Kurt Metzger?

  If you gotta ask what it is, you can't afford it.

• 9:52Duncan Trussell?

  It's a blur to me.

• 9:54Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, anyway, we want to start off first with an important segment. Uh, AI, true or fa, false?

• 10:01Duncan Trussell?

  What do you mean?

• 10:03Kurt Metzger?

  AI, true or fake?

• 10:04Speaker 02

  AI, true or fake?

• 10:48Speaker 03

  Cake offer is purely fictional and for entertainment purposes only. No actual cake, prizes or awards of any kind will be awarded. This is not a real contest for binding offer. Void where prohibited.

• 10:55Kurt Metzger?

  Well, I'm gonna show you some clips Duncan and I want you to apply the skills you learned at Flavor Camp. Uh, at, uh, we won't say which ones and you tell me if these are, uh, clever.

• 11:08Duncan Trussell?

  Okay.

• 11:09Kurt Metzger?

  Deep fakes, okay.

• 11:10Duncan Trussell?

  Let's take a look.

• 11:10Kurt Metzger?

  Let's, let's see what we got. Okay.

• 11:13Speaker 04

  Sometimes Meghan Markle and I have a who's married to the biggest ginger pussy in the world contest. It's a lot of fun. We both sit on a paper towel while our ginger husbands act like huge pussies in front of us. Whoever's towel is driest afterwards wins.

• 11:28Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, she's hilarious. That's real.

• 11:31Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, are you sure?

• 11:32Duncan Trussell?

  Positive, obviously. Look at it.

• 11:35Kurt Metzger?

  Um, yeah, now this is a tricky one Duncan because you know.

• 11:38Duncan Trussell?

  Not really, it's real. AOC number one is known for like, she's funny.

• 11:43Kurt Metzger?

  Mm-hmm.

• 11:43Duncan Trussell?

  And that's just like a hilarious, probably from like an SNL clip or a Jimmy Fallon clip.

• 11:49Kurt Metzger?

  Hmm, hmm. Alright, well there you have it. AI true or fake? And we're saying true. Okay, let's see the next one. Good job.

• 11:58Speaker 05

  There is not a single hole on any woman.

• 12:02Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, we, yeah, well, rewind to the beginning and I'll maybe just, sorry. Uh, now this is, are you familiar with, um?

• 12:09Duncan Trussell?

  Andrew Tate?

• 12:10Kurt Metzger?

  Yes.

• 12:10Duncan Trussell?

  You better fucking believe I am. He changed my life.

• 12:13Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, so you, this one, is this a real Andrew Tate clip?

• 12:17Duncan Trussell?

  Okay.

• 12:17Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, from, uh?

• 12:18Duncan Trussell?

  Better be real. If some motherfucker deep faked my boy, I'd kick his ass.

• 12:22Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, there's a lot on the line for this one.

• 12:24Speaker 05

  There is not a single hole on any woman. That I cannot easily replace with my brother Tristan.

• 12:31Kurt Metzger?

  Hmm.

• 12:31Speaker 05

  Not joking. Mouth? No thanks bitch. I'm doing brothers night with Tristan.

• 12:36Kurt Metzger?

  Hmm.

• 12:36Speaker 05

  Fanny? Uh, you mean in the British stats? Or reverse Yankee style? Who cares bitch? I'll be at Tristan's.

• 12:43Duncan Trussell?

  He's the best. Yeah, that's real. He's super alpha vibes.

• 12:48Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah.

• 12:48Duncan Trussell?

  Like notice the way he's sitting. Like, yeah.

• 12:51Kurt Metzger?

  He's on his grindset for sure.

• 12:52Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, no, that's definitely real.

• 12:54Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, and also, I was gonna call fake because he's Fanny, you know, that's like a good test to know if something's fake about, cause they, a Fanny means something completely different to the British.

• 13:04Duncan Trussell?

  The reason that I think it's definitely real is I feel like, number one, only a fool would deep fake such a badass because he would fuck you up. Number two, only a bitch beta would deep fake him. Number three, a cuck would be the type of person to deep fake him, so that is real.

• 13:23Kurt Metzger?

  Yo, I, I hope there's no betas around here. Let me know, if you guys see any, uh, any of these cucks, you tell me immediately.

• 13:31Duncan Trussell?

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• 14:13Duncan Trussell?

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• 14:51Duncan Trussell?

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• 15:32Duncan Trussell?

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• 16:15Duncan Trussell?

  Nicotine's an addictive chemical, duh.

• 16:19Kurt Metzger?

  Alright, uh, but you got me fired up with that.

• 16:22Duncan Trussell?

  Well, that's just the, that's the Andrew Tate, like if you watched, I think it's, my doctor told me two minutes of Andrew Tate videos is equal to a month of testosterone replacement therapy.

• 16:34Kurt Metzger?

  Is that, is that true?

• 16:35Duncan Trussell?

  Dude, 100%. I started watching his videos and like my hair started falling out and the doctor's like, that's the testosterone.

• 16:42Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, mine started growing back. Alright, uh, let's, uh, see what else we got here.

• 16:48Speaker 06

  Hi Duncan, it's Bill.

• 16:50Duncan Trussell?

  Haha, cool.

• 16:50Speaker 06

  Listen, I wanna invite you out to my compound for like, a week or two?

• 16:56Duncan Trussell?

  Yes.

• 16:57Speaker 06

  An elite training program. I call it Flavor Camp.

• 16:59Duncan Trussell?

  Flavor Camp.

• 17:01Speaker 06

  It's not enough just to have the voice or the dance moves. You need that swag, Nick.

• 17:09Kurt Metzger?

  Oh.

• 17:10Speaker 06

  If you wanna be the goat, just think about it, okay?

• 17:14Kurt Metzger?

  Well, he's laying it right out on the line there.

• 17:16Duncan Trussell?

  I gotta say this man, I don't know why all these like tech, like tech oligarchs have been inviting us to like events, but the answer is yes, Mr. Gates.

• 17:27Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah.

• 17:28Duncan Trussell?

  I would be there in five seconds. That's real. I mean, I, yeah, that's real.

• 17:32Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah.

• 17:33Duncan Trussell?

  That's so cool. I got goosebumps.

• 17:35Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, well, I mean, Duncan, we did go to that. I don't know, did you forget?

• 17:38Duncan Trussell?

  That's what we went to?

• 17:39Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, we went to Flavor Camp. Bill Gates Flavor.

• 17:41Duncan Trussell?

  Well, I wish I could go again.

• 17:43Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, no, I just wanna see.

• 17:44Duncan Trussell?

  Thank you, Mr. Gates.

• 17:46Kurt Metzger?

  I wanna see if the programming helped. So this is a show that I really have been enjoying. It's called Talking Shit with Sir Elton John. I gotta be honest with you, I, I can't see why Elton John would agree to do something like this cheap even though it's a great show.

• 17:59Duncan Trussell?

  Well, he's funny.

• 18:01Kurt Metzger?

  Alright, let's see.

• 18:03Duncan Trussell?

  And he's.

• 18:17Duncan Trussell?

  Ouch.

• 18:21Duncan Trussell?

  Damn.

• 18:26Duncan Trussell?

  Yep.

• 18:31Duncan Trussell?

  Classic.

• 18:32Speaker 05

  Welcome to shit talk. I'm Sir Glitz McJizz. Ever look at Sabrina Carpenter and wonder what kind of Mexican fucking clown college taught this bitch how to put on makeup?

• 18:45Duncan Trussell?

  Yep.

• 18:45Speaker 05

  Eh, caramba. We get it chica, you're a horny midget. No el nido rumplino.

• 18:52Duncan Trussell?

  Yep.

• 18:52Speaker 05

  Por favor, just towel-o, towel-o.

• 18:57Duncan Trussell?

  Damn.

• 18:58Kurt Metzger?

  It was a good show.

• 18:59Duncan Trussell?

  Dude, well, you know, El, Sir Elton John is, you know, I've been enjoying his Substack. You know, he's got an incredible Substack.

• 19:09Kurt Metzger?

  No, I did not know.

• 19:09Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, it's incredible. It's like erotic cryptid fiction.

• 19:14Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, like Bigfoot fuckers?

• 19:15Duncan Trussell?

  Well, chupacabra mostly.

• 19:17Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, that's a real.

• 19:19Duncan Trussell?

  It's, it's not, but let's just say.

• 19:21Kurt Metzger?

  Those are clean your pipes, you know what I mean?

• 19:23Duncan Trussell?

  Let's just say it's not the goat sucker unless goat is.

• 19:28Kurt Metzger?

  You gotta become the goat if you wanna get sucked like the goat.

• 19:30Duncan Trussell?

  But let's just, in, in these stories, you're happy when the chupacabra shows up and you're a cowboy out there all alone.

• 19:38Kurt Metzger?

  Um, yeah, no, I've heard.

• 19:39Duncan Trussell?

  Cause it sucks you, it sucks your dick. That's the, cause chupacabra means goat sucker.

• 19:45Kurt Metzger?

  You know.

• 19:46Duncan Trussell?

  But Sir Elton John, in, in his version, it sucks off lonely cowboys.

• 19:51Kurt Metzger?

  Well, yeah, but, uh, I, I, uh, I've often compared, uh, um, my, you know, my dick to the goat because, uh, a goat, not the goat obviously, but a goat, just because it's like weirdly hairy and yet bald and it's like Ari Shaffir almost.

• 20:07Duncan Trussell?

  Everyone knows.

• 20:08Kurt Metzger?

  Like it looks like Ari Shaffir, my, my cock.

• 20:10Duncan Trussell?

  Anyway, to answer, that's definitely real. That's pure Sir Elton John. That's raw Sir Elton John.

• 20:17Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, what about this, what about this episode though?

• 20:19Duncan Trussell?

  So is this a gag where you only show me real videos?

• 20:22Kurt Metzger?

  No.

• 20:27Duncan Trussell?

  I was at that show.

• 20:28Kurt Metzger?

  You were?

• 20:29Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah. I think so.

• 20:39Kurt Metzger?

  He's the best.

• 20:45Duncan Trussell?

  Great.

• 20:49Kurt Metzger?

  He's still got it, dude.

• 20:50Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, of course.

• 20:51Speaker 05

  It's me, bitches. Ellie Jelly, the shake of shit talk, here to talk some shit. Wanna know some famous clams who secretly pack of pork and yams? Here goes. Michelle Obama, obviously.

• 21:03Duncan Trussell?

  Katy Perry.

• 21:04Speaker 05

  Laura Loomer. Uh, the lesbo from Law and Order.

• 21:08Kurt Metzger?

  Right.

• 21:09Speaker 05

  Um, ooh, hang on, I gotta take a shit real quick.

• 21:13Duncan Trussell?

  Yep.

• 21:14Kurt Metzger?

  Wow. You think he would, he would stop the show to go take a shit?

• 21:17Duncan Trussell?

  Listen.

• 21:18Kurt Metzger?

  That's where I got hung up because he's a concert professional.

• 21:21Duncan Trussell?

  First of all, the one way that you know it's real is because he said, I am Sir Elton John.

• 21:25Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, yeah, that's true. Yeah.

• 21:28Duncan Trussell?

  So real. Obviously real.

• 21:30Kurt Metzger?

  Well, you're doing good. I mean, honestly, you turned me around on somebody we show were fake.

• 21:34Duncan Trussell?

  I am very good at detecting AI tech and deep fakes and that is all, these are all real. And great, too. It's cool, man. Gives me hope for the world.

• 21:43Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, me too. Alright, let's see. What else we got?

• 21:47Speaker 05

  Wanna hear a spooky story? One time I had to kill my personal chef slash gay lover. I was on some talented Mr. Ripley shit.

• 21:56Duncan Trussell?

  Yep.

• 21:56Speaker 05

  I was crying. He was drowning. Cops ruled it was a naked paddle boarding accident.

• 22:01Kurt Metzger?

  I remember that.

• 22:02Speaker 05

  Anyway, go see Kurt Metzger at American Comedy Co. and say.

• 22:06Duncan Trussell?

  Wow, how'd you get him to plug your show?

• 22:08Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, why? I know that's real because my shows were packed from that recommendation.

• 22:12Duncan Trussell?

  I knew he was a fan of yours. That.

• 22:15Kurt Metzger?

  Obama got almost half the room in.

• 22:17Duncan Trussell?

  Here's why Obama not only was like one of the great American presidents, but should be president again. Because where other presidents, uh, not gonna name any names, Cheeto. You know, that's what I call Trump.

• 22:31Kurt Metzger?

  Chester A. Arthur.

• 22:33Duncan Trussell?

  Cheeto. Uh, Obama.

• 22:35Kurt Metzger?

  Rochester A. Arthur.

• 22:37Duncan Trussell?

  Obama, he just calls him like he sees him. You know what I mean?

• 22:41Kurt Metzger?

  Yes, he does.

• 22:42Duncan Trussell?

  And he's funny and he's honest and that's what America needs. I mean, I don't know if you saw that great clip. Maybe, can you pull up the clip where Obama talks about drone striking people dating his daughter? This is how you know he's a totally great dude.

• 22:57Kurt Metzger?

  Whoa.

• 22:57Duncan Trussell?

  This is a funny gag that he made about killing.

• 23:01Kurt Metzger?

  Do you know Jackson Hinkle was about, was gonna bang his daughters, by the way? I wonder if this came out around some time.

• 23:05Duncan Trussell?

  Well, uh, after watching this.

• 23:07Kurt Metzger?

  One of his daughters, not all.

• 23:08Duncan Trussell?

  Look at this. This is so funny. This is his classic.

• 23:11Speaker 05

  The Jonas Brothers are here.

• 23:14Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 23:14Speaker 05

  They're out there somewhere.

• 23:16Duncan Trussell?

  Yep.

• 23:17Speaker 05

  Sasha and Malia are huge fans. But, uh, boys don't get any ideas. I have two words for you. Predator drones.

• 23:26Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah. Boom.

• 23:29Speaker 05

  You will never see a color.

• 23:30Duncan Trussell?

  Love it, man. And he was one of the great presidents we ever, ever had. And you know, when people say that like we, we did some drone strikes that blew up families in Afghanistan, uh, you gotta, you gotta. You gotta, you gotta ask yourself, were those families or were they, they people who mistreated Obama's daughter?

• 23:50Kurt Metzger?

  They were probably Hamas's.

• 23:52Duncan Trussell?

  Well, whatever.

• 23:53Kurt Metzger?

  We know now they were probably Hamas's, all of them.

• 23:54Duncan Trussell?

  It doesn't matter. He's a great president. He will be president again.

• 23:58Kurt Metzger?

  I could hope.

• 23:59Duncan Trussell?

  And that is real. That was not a deep fake.

• 24:01Kurt Metzger?

  Boy, she has a tall ass head, don't she? She looks like.

• 24:04Duncan Trussell?

  Beautiful woman.

• 24:05Kurt Metzger?

  The bad guy from, uh, True Lies that.

• 24:08Duncan Trussell?

  Beautiful woman. A beautiful woman.

• 24:10Kurt Metzger?

  Could you pull up?

• 24:11Duncan Trussell?

  Let's show the next video. Beautiful woman, please.

• 24:13Kurt Metzger?

  Who wore it best?

• 24:14Duncan Trussell?

  Beautiful woman. Let's show the next, uh, video, please. Next deep fake or ill. Beautiful woman.

• 24:22Kurt Metzger?

  You know, do you remember the terrorists from True Lies, though?

• 24:24Duncan Trussell?

  If I wasn't married, uh, I would take her hand in marriage.

• 24:29Kurt Metzger?

  Alright, let's see what else we got. We got a sort of.

• 24:33Speaker 06

  Oh, hello. I was just in the middle of eating an Asian baby. You know, when I was just a young hatchling, father would bring home all kinds of tender young babies, fresh from the orphanage, and I would unhinge my jaw and swallow them whole. It was great fun. Then we would all seek heil.

• 24:54Kurt Metzger?

  Well, that's historically accurate at the very least.

• 24:56Duncan Trussell?

  I think that this is real.

• 24:58Kurt Metzger?

  Right.

• 24:58Duncan Trussell?

  But I think that she is doing a scene from like a Quentin Tarantino movie.

• 25:04Kurt Metzger?

  No, it's that Ricky Gervais fucking show with her. Yeah. I'd like to see the outtakes of that with Ricky cracking up.

• 25:11Duncan Trussell?

  Dude.

• 25:12Kurt Metzger?

  You know, how'd she keep a straight face?

• 25:14Duncan Trussell?

  Well, she, you know, British comedy. It's dry.

• 25:17Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah. The driest there is.

• 25:19Duncan Trussell?

  So these are all real.

• 25:20Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, what's next?

• 25:22Speaker 05

  Lot of antisemites out there. Sad. Very sad. Claiming Jews run the media. They're wrong. Dead wrong. Just one Jew, Larry Ellison, Jew, runs the media. I'm serious. He bought all the things. His goofy kid has no eyebrows. It's absolutely bonkers. Never seen anything like it.

• 25:43Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, you know what? Let's look at Larry Ellison's son and here's, I know how we can know if this is real or not.

• 25:47Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 25:48Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, Larry Ellison's son, uh, now Larry Ellison did buy all the things.

• 25:51Duncan Trussell?

  I didn't even know Larry Ellison had a kid.

• 25:53Kurt Metzger?

  Well, yeah, go on the picture of David. Let's see. Oh my God.

• 25:58Kurt Metzger?

  Let's get a, just David. I want to just check his eyebrows real quick.

• 26:04Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, I'm not seeing any eyebrows. Are you?

• 26:06Duncan Trussell?

  Uh, hold on a second.

• 26:08Kurt Metzger?

  I mean, yo, oh, wait. Hold on. Oh, they're just really blonde, dude.

• 26:14Duncan Trussell?

  I see a little eyebrow there.

• 26:16Kurt Metzger?

  So you think it's Trump just being exaggerating?

• 26:18Duncan Trussell?

  Well, can we cut back to that Trump? Footage again? Let me take another quick look at that. This one's kind of throwing me for a loop.

• 26:27Kurt Metzger?

  Me, me as well.

• 26:28Speaker 05

  Lot of antisemites out there.

• 26:29Duncan Trussell?

  Can you pause it right there?

• 26:31Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah.

• 26:32Duncan Trussell?

  Okay.

• 26:34Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, that's real.

• 26:35Kurt Metzger?

  Okay.

• 26:36Duncan Trussell?

  That's totally real, man.

• 26:37Kurt Metzger?

  Cause he's just insulting the eyebrows.

• 26:39Duncan Trussell?

  Well, yeah, I mean, I feel like that's classic Trump.

• 26:42Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, it is.

• 26:43Duncan Trussell?

  You know, that kind of loving.

• 26:45Kurt Metzger?

  That's fair.

• 26:46Duncan Trussell?

  Jab at friends. And, um,

• 26:48Kurt Metzger?

  Yes.

• 26:49Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, very funny president, funniest president, I guess arguably the funniest president that ever lived.

• 26:55Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, yeah, I mean, you know, Reagan had a lot of comics writing jokes for him. But I think Trump has that improv skill.

• 27:04Duncan Trussell?

  He just, he just throws those zingers out.

• 27:07Kurt Metzger?

  Time. I remember talking about this with Nate Bargatze. That's how long ago this was. And, uh, we were talking about Nate, said it as a joke, actually. He goes, yeah, well, I had an idea for a president who just does crowd work.

• 27:20Kurt Metzger?

  And, uh, I thought it was pretty funny. And then we have that.

• 27:23Duncan Trussell?

  It's, we're so lucky.

• 27:24Kurt Metzger?

  President crowd work.

• 27:25Duncan Trussell?

  Well, can you pull up Trump?

• 27:26Kurt Metzger?

  I'm just gonna have fun with him tonight, you know?

• 27:28Duncan Trussell?

  Can you pull up Trump talking about how he's got the bigger button? Now, a lot of people saw this as like, you know, threatening nuclear war, you know, the cocks and the pussies out there think president shouldn't do this. President Trump lashing back at the North Korean leader as a new war of words broke out over nuclear threats. The president quick to respond after Kim Jong-un's New Year's Day address.

• 27:51Kurt Metzger?

  Now that's, come on. I don't want deep fakes. That's racist.

• 27:54Duncan Trussell?

  That's fake.

• 27:55Kurt Metzger?

  That is racist.

• 27:56Duncan Trussell?

  Thank you. That's fake. Why are you guys showing that?

• 27:58Kurt Metzger?

  Get it off. No one talks like that.

• 28:00Duncan Trussell?

  No one talks like that. That's fake.

• 28:02Kurt Metzger?

  Take your Asian hate the fuck off my shelf.

• 28:04Duncan Trussell?

  Alright, I guess we're at YMH, huh? No, not on the mystery, boys. We're not seeking to that.

• 28:09Kurt Metzger?

  The Rogan's fear racism, just like they told me.

• 28:11Duncan Trussell?

  We're not doing Rogan's fear racism. Please do not play deep fakes.

• 28:14Kurt Metzger?

  That was offensive.

• 28:16Duncan Trussell?

  No, not funny. That's not funny.

• 28:18Kurt Metzger?

  Was this one of those JD Vance, uh, oh, he's got a fat head.

• 28:21Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, I'm laughing so hard.

• 28:23Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, yeah, there's really people that look like that.

• 28:26Duncan Trussell?

  So this is what you guys do? This is what you do?

• 28:28Kurt Metzger?

  There's not real people whose faces are that two dimensional. Stop hating Asians, okay?

• 28:34Duncan Trussell?

  Why are you doing this? Wow. This episode is sponsored by BlueChew.

• 28:40Kurt Metzger?

  BlueChew.

• 28:42Duncan Trussell?

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• 28:59Kurt Metzger?

  You won't never run out of milk.

• 29:00Duncan Trussell?

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• 29:43Duncan Trussell?

  Right now, when you buy two months of BlueChew Gold, you get the third for free with promo code mystery. That's promo code mystery. Visit BlueChew.com for more details and important safety information. And the mystery boys, thank BlueChew for sponsoring the podcast.

• 30:02Kurt Metzger?

  Alright, let's, uh, see the other Trump ones because I'm, I'm getting.

• 30:06Duncan Trussell?

  That was, that was, that was so fucked up.

• 30:09Kurt Metzger?

  I mean, you have to have another tall boy of white claw and relax now.

• 30:12Speaker 05

  Don't even get me started on Zelensky. Little coke head fucking cabbage smurf. Wanna know what I told him? Would you like to know? I told him Rat Boy Summer was last year.

• 30:23Kurt Metzger?

  It was.

• 30:24Speaker 05

  You goblin eared fuck. Then cupped my hand and whacked him right in his little rat balls. Same thing I did to Macron's wife.

• 30:32Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, shots fired.

• 30:35Duncan Trussell?

  That's real. There is no way an AI could duplicate that level of pure Trump comedy.

• 30:42Kurt Metzger?

  Alright, you heard him first word. Let's, let's see the next one. Oh, that's the wife. Yeah.

• 30:46Speaker 05

  Is Pete Hegseth a weirdo or what? He puts all that shit in his hair, like one of those 50s greasers, just completely shellacked. Like he's about to sing doo-wop into a comb. Then he's got like Da Vinci Code tattoos.

• 31:02Kurt Metzger?

  That's true.

• 31:03Speaker 05

  The Virgin Mary just called. She said, calm the fuck down.

• 31:07Kurt Metzger?

  Oh.

• 31:08Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, yeah. You could tell it's real by his mouth.

• 31:10Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, his mouth is a, when Trump closes mouth, there's no lip line.

• 31:15Duncan Trussell?

  That presidential lip seal. It's so interesting.

• 31:19Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah.

• 31:19Duncan Trussell?

  They all do that. That's real.

• 31:21Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, and Pete Hegseth does have hair like that as well.

• 31:24Duncan Trussell?

  That's gotta be real.

• 31:25Kurt Metzger?

  Can we just see Pete Hegseth's hair real quick? It looks like he's always, he just came out of a pool all the time on his hair.

• 31:31Duncan Trussell?

  Let me see.

• 31:35Kurt Metzger?

  What is that Brill cream?

• 31:36Duncan Trussell?

  What?

• 31:37Kurt Metzger?

  Look at it. Look at his hair. There's one right there. That's good. That's got the gel in it.

• 31:41Duncan Trussell?

  Let me take a look.

• 31:42Kurt Metzger?

  It. When does his hair get dry?

• 31:45Duncan Trussell?

  What?

• 31:46Kurt Metzger?

  Look how wet and look how much shit he's gotten it.

• 31:48Duncan Trussell?

  Okay, so I'm gonna give you a little information that maybe you could use.

• 31:51Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, fine, thanks.

• 31:52Duncan Trussell?

  You know, I know you're in a committed relationship, but.

• 31:54Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, well, I'm not that committed.

• 31:55Duncan Trussell?

  Okay, great. So, one thing Hegseth figured out, that a lot of us figured out. Did you know that after masturbating, if you rub your own jizz into your hair, not only does it work as an incredible gel.

• 32:10Kurt Metzger?

  I do know that, but don't ask me why I know.

• 32:13Duncan Trussell?

  It doesn't even have to be your own jizz. You don't have to tiptoe around it. If you let men come in your hair, no one here is gonna judge you. This is the mystery boys. This isn't the judgment boys. And it's okay to get come in your hair. It works. I mean, honestly, like.

• 32:28Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, that's why I've heard of this.

• 32:30Duncan Trussell?

  There's been.

• 32:31Kurt Metzger?

  Something about Mary and the thing about her was her hair is encrusted with jism.

• 32:36Duncan Trussell?

  Well, that was a nod to something that shamans of yore taught. And I would be late for a job interview and go to a glory hole, not to pleasure myself or be pleasured, or pleasure another man, but just because they would come in my hair and then I'd comb it right in. I'd get that job because the pheromones from the jizz. Hegseth is a leader. Hegseth is a leader and leaders, General Patton. Um, Genghis Khan, Napoleon Bonaparte, all of them would have their men masturbate into their hair. Prior to battle.

• 33:15Kurt Metzger?

  Why not? Okay, uh, what else we got? Did you actually look up Genghis Khan masturbation? What he said about fapping?

• 33:24Duncan Trussell?

  There, wait, there's a Genghis Khan.

• 33:26Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, I don't believe that he had.

• 33:27Duncan Trussell?

  Genghis Khan said about fapping? The strongest leader in the world ever. He said, "Son, keep your..." He's talking to his kid? "Son, keep your sperm for later." "You will have plenty of wives and lovers to spill it to."

• 33:45Kurt Metzger?

  All his sons became great leaders. Okay, so, number one. They became such great leaders, his empire fell not that long after. Okay, let's look at the next one. I don't know, we're gonna hear misinformation from fucking.

• 33:58Kurt Metzger?

  You know.

• 33:58Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, guys, stop showing misinformation, please.

• 34:00Speaker 05

  Just one. Wanna know what it is? I'll tell you. Fart jars, celebrity fart jars.

• 34:05Kurt Metzger?

  Oh.

• 34:06Speaker 05

  I collect jars of celebrity farts. Do you do it? Do you jar your farts?

• 34:10Kurt Metzger?

  No.

• 34:10Speaker 05

  You should.

• 34:11Kurt Metzger?

  Alright.

• 34:11Speaker 05

  Absolutely. ABJ, always be jarring.

• 34:15Duncan Trussell?

  Wow. Now, I knew he's, I mean, that's, we all know that.

• 34:18Kurt Metzger?

  Fart jars, that's a, that is a rich man's vice, collecting celebrity fart jars?

• 34:23Duncan Trussell?

  They ain't cheap. Let me tell you, if you think cameo is expensive, try to get. Try to get, like, even like, you know.

• 34:31Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, I managed to get.

• 34:33Duncan Trussell?

  A jar fart from anybody. I have a Leonard, my dad had Leonard Nimoy's fart in a jar and he was very proud of that.

• 34:39Kurt Metzger?

  You wanna hear a crazy one?

• 34:41Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 34:41Kurt Metzger?

  Okay? There's a crazy one I have.

• 34:44Duncan Trussell?

  What?

• 34:44Kurt Metzger?

  You're not gonna believe me that I have it.

• 34:45Duncan Trussell?

  I'll believe you.

• 34:46Kurt Metzger?

  Okay. Uh, it, you remember in, uh, uh, the Lost in Translation with Scar Joe and Bill Murray?

• 34:54Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, sure.

• 34:55Kurt Metzger?

  And you know the famous scene at the end where Bill Murray whispers something in her ear, but you don't know what it is?

• 35:00Duncan Trussell?

  Yes.

• 35:01Kurt Metzger?

  And, and I always assumed it was, "Hey, thanks for wasting my time and cock tease me, bitch."

• 35:05Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 35:05Kurt Metzger?

  But it's not that.

• 35:06Duncan Trussell?

  What is it?

• 35:07Kurt Metzger?

  He was saying, "Would you mind farting into a jar later for my friend who collects farts?"

• 35:12Duncan Trussell?

  And that was Trump.

• 35:13Kurt Metzger?

  And guess what the answer was? Yes. So, uh, he had that. And then he lost it in a lawsuit with Richard Dreyfuss or something. Or no, I'm sorry, Lucy Liu. He had a, Lucy Liu had a lawsuit about some kind of violence onset or something.

• 35:26Duncan Trussell?

  Wow.

• 35:26Kurt Metzger?

  She gets it.

• 35:27Duncan Trussell?

  Wow.

• 35:28Kurt Metzger?

  She loses it in a goddamn poker game. I get it off Dark Timu, uh, probably, uh, 15 years later, when I got these shoes.

• 35:36Duncan Trussell?

  Okay, well, guess what? Okay, let me add to it. This is where it gets really cool.

• 35:41Kurt Metzger?

  Hmm.

• 35:42Duncan Trussell?

  Another collector of celebrity fart jars, of course, was Steven Spielberg. Everybody knows that. That's not some fucking, that's not a deep cut.

• 35:50Kurt Metzger?

  Well, he actually has some onsite, uh, uh, people, like, I mean, they're kids, that, that, who just fart into jars all day. Like a Norman Rockwell kind of thing. I, I don't know how to describe it.

• 36:02Duncan Trussell?

  It's actually, you know, I think that there, you know, people, when people talk about his collecting of, like, fart jars of all ages, they, it would be easy to see that in the wrong light.

• 36:13Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah.

• 36:13Duncan Trussell?

  But it was pure health reasons. It was insurance at the time on Hollywood movies. You had to make sure your kids were healthy and the best way to tell if your kid's healthy is to smell their fart. Put it in the fart jar at the end of, like, before every day of shooting.

• 36:25Kurt Metzger?

  Right.

• 36:26Duncan Trussell?

  He would go to every actor, not just the kids.

• 36:28Kurt Metzger?

  Yes.

• 36:28Duncan Trussell?

  Smell the farts.

• 36:29Kurt Metzger?

  Yes.

• 36:29Duncan Trussell?

  Be like, "Okay, you can shoot today."

• 36:31Kurt Metzger?

  You know what? I know what you're talking about.

• 36:32Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 36:33Kurt Metzger?

  Because, and I, he started that after Poltergeist and that blonde girl, uh, died.

• 36:37Duncan Trussell?

  God rest her soul.

• 36:38Kurt Metzger?

  And it's because no, no concerned adult was smelling her farts to see how she was doing.

• 36:42Duncan Trussell?

  Bingo.

• 36:43Kurt Metzger?

  And what has happened? She gets septic on the set and, uh, they, they already.

• 36:46Duncan Trussell?

  You got it.

• 36:47Kurt Metzger?

  Had her autopsied and ready to go before the parents even got there.

• 36:50Duncan Trussell?

  You got it.

• 36:50Kurt Metzger?

  Because Spielberg cares.

• 36:52Duncan Trussell?

  A true tragedy. Now, can we please pull up the scene from Raiders of the Lost Ark, where the Nazis are getting their faces melted?

• 37:02Kurt Metzger?

  Why?

• 37:02Duncan Trussell?

  Because I'm about to give you some funny trivia.

• 37:04Speaker 03

  This is the bariatric gelatin bedtime recipe.

• 37:07Duncan Trussell?

  That, that is actually, that gelatin is my favorite gelatin. Now.

• 37:10Speaker 03

  It's natural.

• 37:11Duncan Trussell?

  Now, I can't believe that popped up. Okay, pause right here.

• 37:14Kurt Metzger?

  I got a whole soup of maybe.

• 37:15Duncan Trussell?

  Pause right here. So, this is like, one of, this is an example of Steven Spielberg's incredible talent at directing. We all know this.

• 37:24Duncan Trussell?

  Scene from Raiders of the Lost Ark, the Nazis are about to make a big mistake.

• 37:28Kurt Metzger?

  Which is what?

• 37:29Duncan Trussell?

  They're gonna look into the ark, which has within it the dust from the Ten Commandments, but.

• 37:34Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, wait, wait, that's what that was? Ten Commandments dust?

• 37:38Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, it was the dust from, I mean, not, not in this, this is, I mean, obviously, it's not the real ark. Here's what's interesting about this, this scene. Steven Spielberg, guess what he put in the ark right before filming the scene?

• 37:54Kurt Metzger?

  What?

• 37:54Duncan Trussell?

  He took all the fart jars from everyone on cast, from the entire shooting, all the remnant farts, all the leftover farts. That's Harrison Ford farts. He put them in the ark. So that when they opened the ark and looked into it, they would get the waft of the entire, all the farts from this movie.

• 38:15Kurt Metzger?

  I know you believe that theory. The thing I was saying Duncan was, I don't believe just common peasant farts can do that. I think that he really had, in his possession, some very important.

• 38:25Duncan Trussell?

  He had the fart of King Arthur.

• 38:27Kurt Metzger?

  Like, something like that, dude.

• 38:28Duncan Trussell?

  No, for real.

• 38:29Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, are we even fighting?

• 38:31Duncan Trussell?

  I don't think we're fighting.

• 38:32Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, nice. Alright, let's check the next one. True or fake?

• 38:36Duncan Trussell?

  But he did have a fart.

• 38:37Speaker 05

  I need to tell you something. Something that was left out of the Charlie Sheen documentary. It was me. I did it. I'm the one who fucked Corey Haynes' butt with Crisco.

• 38:48Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, well, that settles that. I mean, I don't know.

• 38:50Duncan Trussell?

  Classic Nick Cage.

• 38:52Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, that's why they call him the Ghost Rider.

• 38:54Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, I, I mean, you know, I don't, I don't think he really banged his butt with Crisco, but I do think that's Nick Cage making a funny joke.

• 39:01Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, I thought Crisco was like a Mexican stagehand. Alright, let's see the next one.

• 39:05Duncan Trussell?

  When I was a kid, I covered myself with Crisco.

• 39:07Speaker 03

  Does Israel lose its temper sometimes? Sure, who doesn't? Does Israel hit me sometimes? Yes. Yes, it does. But that's only because Israel loves me so much, so much. And guess what? I love Israel too, so much, so fucking much. You could never understand what we have, so just stay out of it.

• 39:30Kurt Metzger?

  Alright, well, I mean, that does sound like Ted Cruz.

• 39:32Duncan Trussell?

  If more politicians had the fucking courage.

• 39:36Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah.

• 39:36Duncan Trussell?

  He just displayed, then we would be living in a very different world.

• 39:40Kurt Metzger?

  That is a fact.

• 39:41Duncan Trussell?

  And I'm sure he says a thing like that. I'd hate to look at the comments. Everyone's blah, blah, blah, blah.

• 39:47Kurt Metzger?

  Turn the comments off for when you wanna, you know, tell the truth, is my advice.

• 39:50Duncan Trussell?

  They should not let people make comments on social media.

• 39:52Kurt Metzger?

  People shouldn't be able to have input in any single thing that affects their lives at all.

• 39:56Duncan Trussell?

  At all.

• 39:57Kurt Metzger?

  I mean, like, what is this?

• 39:58Duncan Trussell?

  Well, I'll tell you what it, what, what, it's, it's a pseudo democracy. Democracy was never about people participating in anything.

• 40:07Kurt Metzger?

  No, sir. It was about the platonic ideal and the noble lie, where you tell the rabble one thing and you do another thing because that's how, it, that's how you maintain a pyramid.

• 40:18Duncan Trussell?

  I wish we, I wish we, the show was over because how do we follow that?

• 40:22Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah. Well, let's see the next one. I think it's more Ted Cruz here. I don't know.

• 40:25Speaker 03

  So then I say, "Whoa, hold on there, partner. You got about five seconds to explain how anything you just said helps defend the blessed state of Israel." Or I walk. That's simple. Guess what? He couldn't come up with a single thing, so I pulled my pants up and I never went to that urologist ever again.

• 40:44Kurt Metzger?

  Well. Uh, I mean, the guy likes Israel. We, we established that.

• 40:48Duncan Trussell?

  I don't know, that's real.

• 40:49Kurt Metzger?

  Even if it's not real, what is he gonna be mad?

• 40:51Duncan Trussell?

  That doesn't even seem, I don't know.

• 40:53Kurt Metzger?

  And so do we, I hope that's true.

• 40:54Duncan Trussell?

  Are you guys gonna reveal which of these is real and which is fake at the end of this, or what?

• 40:59Kurt Metzger?

  Are AI a myth? Because so far, I haven't really seen a fake. Okay, let's see what else we got.

• 41:04Speaker 05

  Big Willie, Fresh Prince, not gay, don't be.

• 41:08Duncan Trussell?

  I love him.

• 41:08Kurt Metzger?

  So this one I got, yeah, just, so, somebody asked him off the dome, dude, to do a freestyle. You know, the Fresh Prince? Because people, you know, he doesn't get the credit he should as an MC.

• 41:19Duncan Trussell?

  That's like asking the ocean to make water.

• 41:21Kurt Metzger?

  That, yeah. Well, don't spoil it because, but you're right. Okay.

• 41:26Speaker 05

  Big Willie, Fresh Prince, not gay, don't be silly. Funky fresh all day, with a homo rock this frilly. Pussy stinks like old tuna, still I eat it, no perk. Dad taught me, real men can do smelly work. Real ones adapt. We don't run, we deal. So, I spray some Fabreeze to keep the vibe chill.

• 41:53Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, well, that's about.

• 41:54Duncan Trussell?

  Fuck!

• 41:55Kurt Metzger?

  That's about fatherhood and being a dad.

• 41:57Duncan Trussell?

  Fuck! Like, you know, I, I don't wanna feel jealous, but when I see people spit like that, and it just flows, it's like, do they have a different brain than I do? How do you do that?

• 42:14Kurt Metzger?

  Well, it's channeling, and that's part of the MKUltra thing we're gonna get into later. Uh, you, you, you invite the spirit into your body to work you like a.

• 42:22Duncan Trussell?

  Well, spirit, I wish you were coming to my body because I can't do that.

• 42:26Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, what else we got?

• 42:30Kurt Metzger?

  That was like too real, I would say.

• 42:32Duncan Trussell?

  So, okay.

• 42:33Kurt Metzger?

  That was real than real.

• 42:34Duncan Trussell?

  So, uh, YMH, what's the verdict? Uh, how many do we get right? How many do we get wrong?

• 42:39Speaker 06

  So, you guys got, surprisingly, all of them right.

• 42:43Kurt Metzger?

  Well, well, there you go.

• 42:45Speaker 02

  AI, true or fake?

• 43:24Kurt Metzger?

  Wow Duncan, what a great game, AI, true or fake?

• 43:28Duncan Trussell?

  So fun.

• 43:29Kurt Metzger?

  You nailed every single one, except for that, of course, the racist. Well, thank God it's not racist, because Tanner's half Asian, we know now, in the past, but that would have been racist to say that that fake Kim Jong, well, I don't know the family, but

• 43:42Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 43:43Kurt Metzger?

  He puts up this balloon head that looks like something out of Elder Scrolls Oblivion.

• 43:46Duncan Trussell?

  Yep.

• 43:47Kurt Metzger?

  And expected us to buy that. And a perfect score on, the game's a little long, and I will say, the theme song.

• 43:54Duncan Trussell?

  Incredible.

• 43:55Kurt Metzger?

  The theme song's a bit long for a game show.

• 43:57Duncan Trussell?

  And by the way, much thanks to Shania Twain's sister, Gloria Twain, for teaching us those dance moves, and for YMH for getting us into a dance studio.

• 44:07Kurt Metzger?

  Because Segura learned how to dance back then, he knows Glow Twain. You know, if you don't know Glow Twain, that's the, that's the tween we should have got. I'm just gonna put that out there, I don't want to start friction with them.

• 44:18Duncan Trussell?

  Are you saying Glow Twain, or Glow Taint?

• 44:21Kurt Metzger?

  Who are you talking, I'm talking about Glow, no, I'm not talking about Shania Twain's husband Glow Taint, I'm talking about Gloria Twain.

• 44:28Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, Glow Twain, oh.

• 44:29Kurt Metzger?

  Not Glow Taint, her second husband, from the cult.

• 44:32Duncan Trussell?

  You're calling her Glow. Did you fuck her? I just got this feeling during the-

• 44:36Kurt Metzger?

  My fifth wife Jenna's standing in the back, so, no, I didn't, and that's a weird thing.

• 44:40Duncan Trussell?

  Sorry Jenna, I didn't say you did, I just asked if you did.

• 44:44Kurt Metzger?

  My fifth wife Jenna-

• 44:45Duncan Trussell?

  Sorry Jenna.

• 44:46Kurt Metzger?

  Von Science.

• 44:47Duncan Trussell?

  I think she'd understand, things get hot and heavy when you're training for dance moves.

• 44:51Kurt Metzger?

  Glow Twain can dance, I'll tell you that.

• 44:53Duncan Trussell?

  It's erotic, it was erotic in there, and I didn't, anyway, sorry Jenna, but you didn't need to-

• 44:58Kurt Metzger?

  The point is, it's a long theme song for a game show. The rest of the episode, we, we do get into MKUltra, uh, uh, uh, not that, not as much as for an episode that we said was exactly gonna be about that.

• 45:11Duncan Trussell?

  But enough.

• 45:12Kurt Metzger?

  But it's, you've had enough, I'll tell you that.

• 45:14Duncan Trussell?

  And salute, yet again, to the CIA, keeping us safe, learning about the human mind, and who we are and where we're going.

• 45:22Kurt Metzger?

  And come see me in Florida, August 22nd, what is it called, Ticket something?

• 45:26Duncan Trussell?

  Punch Up.

• 45:27Kurt Metzger?

  Punch Up Live, go on, Kirk Mason's Punch Up Live.

• 45:29Duncan Trussell?

  Will you, we, sorry, say that again, I'm sorry, I cut you off.

• 45:32Kurt Metzger?

  I know, it's okay, I thought you were dead, so I'm just happy that you're alive.

• 45:35Duncan Trussell?

  I'm sorry, man.

• 45:36Kurt Metzger?

  I announced you were dead.

• 45:37Duncan Trussell?

  Can you look up my next date, so I can plug it too? I always forget to do this.

• 45:42Kurt Metzger?

  We'll just insert it in post. We'll insert it in post, just like we inserted Duncan in post, because he was busy partying with Hunter Biden.

• 45:50Duncan Trussell?

  I love insertions.

• 45:51Kurt Metzger?

  I can't wait until I see the episode from two weeks ago where you explain yourself interviewing Hunter Biden without me. Okay.

• 45:56Duncan Trussell?

  And I'm gonna be at Hyenas Comedy Nightclub, August 14th and 15th, so come on down to, Hyenas in Albuquerque, New Mexico.

• 46:08Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, please do. Uh, okay. Uh, anyway, uh, what is it called, yeah, Punch Up Live, there's my Florida dates, I mean, what do you want, I'm meeting in Florida.

• 46:19Duncan Trussell?

  Come on now.

• 46:20Kurt Metzger?

  Now let's finish up.

• 46:21Duncan Trussell?

  Give him a applause!

• 46:23Kurt Metzger?

  And now back-

• 46:24Duncan Trussell?

  Fuck yeah!

• 46:25Kurt Metzger?

  Now back to Mystery Boys, episode one, I gotta put on my Aura goggles, because of all this aura.

• 46:30Duncan Trussell?

  See ya now!

• 46:32Kurt Metzger?

  Mystery Boys, you know, you don't get one past a Mystery Boys that easy.

• 46:36Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 46:37Kurt Metzger?

  I don't care what kind of fancy tech you got.

• 46:38Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, but you know what, I do think it's an important time right now to talk about cognitive security in the age of misinformation.

• 46:46Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah.

• 46:46Duncan Trussell?

  Guys, there's a lot of misinformation out there, and with this new deep fake technology, it is possible that you could be watching something that's not real at all. There's a lot of stuff that you've probably been seeing on the news regarding Jeffrey Epstein, and implications that high-ranking government officials, and even some of our beloved national billionaires, could be involved in this conspiracy.

• 47:13Kurt Metzger?

  Our captains of industry.

• 47:15Duncan Trussell?

  You might see videos coming out that would point in the direction of our entire country being infiltrated by-

• 47:24Kurt Metzger?

  Listen, I, I, I thought there was some more to the Epstein thing as well, I mean, I'm like, everybody, you know, uh, I was just surprised, it just went nowhere, sometimes that happens.

• 47:35Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 47:36Kurt Metzger?

  Okay?

• 47:36Duncan Trussell?

  Thank you for admitting that.

• 47:37Kurt Metzger?

  Goes cold.

• 47:38Duncan Trussell?

  Thank you for admitting that.

• 47:39Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah.

• 47:40Duncan Trussell?

  That takes courage.

• 47:41Kurt Metzger?

  We don't know, we may, whatever country he worked, we don't know what country he worked for, we may never know.

• 47:47Duncan Trussell?

  And it doesn't matter.

• 47:49Kurt Metzger?

  And it doesn't matter what country, Jeffrey Epstein-ah, worked for.

• 47:56Duncan Trussell?

  And I, I do, I want to say this, I also want to apologize for anything that, hold on a second, these, hold on, the glasses they gave me are glitching.

• 48:06Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, go ahead.

• 48:06Duncan Trussell?

  Hold on. Okay, yeah, I got it, I got it, just say it again. I want to apologize for anything that I have said that would have given anyone out there the impression that I do not have full faith in the federal government, not just in their role as leaders, but in their role as, what?

• 48:27Kurt Metzger?

  Is that Larry?

• 48:27Duncan Trussell?

  A lamp upon the hill.

• 48:28Kurt Metzger?

  Is that Larry?

• 48:29Duncan Trussell?

  A lamp upon the hill.

• 48:30Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, what?

• 48:31Duncan Trussell?

  Uh, leading-

• 48:32Kurt Metzger?

  Did he say anything about me?

• 48:33Duncan Trussell?

  Leading, shut, shut the fuck up.

• 48:36Kurt Metzger?

  Just tell me so.

• 48:36Duncan Trussell?

  Leading America, leading America forward, and all, and all of us should unite, the nation's so divided, our common goal should be unity.

• 48:50Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, he wasn't mad about that I said that thing with his on his eyebrows, right? Because I think it's on his eyebrows.

• 48:54Duncan Trussell?

  Doesn't fucking matter.

• 48:54Kurt Metzger?

  Okay.

• 48:56Duncan Trussell?

  Are you mad about that?

• 48:57Kurt Metzger?

  No, no, no, no.

• 48:58Duncan Trussell?

  He said, just cut that out of the thing.

• 49:00Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, okay, all right. What's the, what's the next fake?

• 49:02Duncan Trussell?

  Today's episode is about MKUltra, and to introduce this, we have a special, um, video that we shot, thank you YMH for funding this, uh, and just, we'll just show this video to guys, for those of you who don't know what MKUltra is, a lot of people have no idea what this is, we thought we'd give you sort of the, the basic, this is MKUltra, and then after that, we will celebrate all the great things that MKUltra has done for our country. Can we show that MKUltra video, guys? Yeah, I'll tell him.

• 49:32Speaker 04

  Grandpa, what was MKUltra?

• 49:34Speaker 02

  MKUltra was the code name for a clandestine Central Intelligence Agency program of research into mind control, behavioral modification, and chemical interrogation techniques, initiated in 1953, under the Office of Scientific Intelligence, and continuing until approximately 1973. The program encompassed over 130 sub-projects conducted at universities, hospitals, prisons, and other institutions across the United States and Canada.

• 50:11Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 50:12Speaker 02

  Often involved in consensual administration of LSD, hypnosis, sensory deprivation, and other experimental methods on unwitting human subjects. The good news is that the federal government no longer does this stuff, and definitely isn't controlling anyone's mind. Because America doesn't do stuff like that no more.

• 51:28Duncan Trussell?

  Bingo koala nap. Oh, red butterfly bingo koala nap. Kurt. When you hear that you gotta move fast, get the key from. Are we at the brown party?

• 51:39Duncan Trussell?

  Kurt? Kurt? Guys, cut. Something happened to Kurt. Guys, cut. Kurt? Kurt?

• 51:46Kurt Metzger?

  And we're back. You're watching Mystery Boys. My name is Kirby Rescorante, and as with all me.

• 51:53Duncan Trussell?

  I'm Lord Calvin Bro. Uh.

• 51:57Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, wow. What a great show we got for you today. We're gonna be talking about MKUltra.

• 52:03Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, MK. Now, MKUltra is very misunderstood. A lot of people. And again, I, you know, I don't want to get woke on everybody.

• 52:12Kurt Metzger?

  Please, please don't. That is the last thing we need in this house.

• 52:17Duncan Trussell?

  I don't, I want to get woke.

• 52:23Duncan Trussell?

  May I continue, please? I don't want to get woke on everybody here. But I do feel like there's a lot of people working in the CIA that really have devoted their lives to an un- not easy job. Can we pull up the CIA's website real quick?

• 52:40Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, yeah, let's get that out.

• 52:43Duncan Trussell?

  CIA.gov.

• 52:45Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, God.

• 52:46Duncan Trussell?

  You're like.

• 52:50Duncan Trussell?

  Can we pull up?

• 52:53Kurt Metzger?

  Oh. Dude, I.

• 52:56Duncan Trussell?

  Look at this. CIA dot. So all you people are out there, all you people out there. Oh, there's chemtrails. Yeah, go to CIA.gov. We're the nation's first line of defense. It says it all. And a lot of time was invested into MKUltra. The Soviets were using sodium pentathal and a lot of other not good chemicals.

• 53:17Kurt Metzger?

  Fucking Soviets.

• 53:18Duncan Trussell?

  To fuck with us.

• 53:19Kurt Metzger?

  Fucking Chinese.

• 53:21Duncan Trussell?

  And the Chinese and the Russians. No, that guy says the Soviets.

• 53:24Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, could you just keep going? I'd like. I'd like came in my pants.

• 53:29Duncan Trussell?

  That, put it in your hair.

• 53:31Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, well. I.

• 53:34Duncan Trussell?

  It's okay.

• 53:35Kurt Metzger?

  Hindsight's 2020, Duncan.

• 53:37Duncan Trussell?

  Man, this is a safe space, brother. You can come in your pants through the whole episode.

• 53:41Kurt Metzger?

  Well, I did, so that's good news.

• 53:43Duncan Trussell?

  You know, I gotta say, man, if you're not coming in your pants, like at least a few times in a lifetime, probably you're not living right.

• 53:52Kurt Metzger?

  And that's called living the Sigma grind set.

• 53:55Duncan Trussell?

  Yes. If you ain't jizzing in your pants, you're a beta cuck.

• 54:00Kurt Metzger?

  I wouldn't even want to meet somebody like that who's in jizz in their pants when they hear the first few words of an MKUltra song.

• 54:06Duncan Trussell?

  I can smell your cum.

• 54:10Kurt Metzger?

  Thanks, man.

• 54:12Duncan Trussell?

  You're healthy.

• 54:13Kurt Metzger?

  What? Yeah, that.

• 54:19Kurt Metzger?

  Hmm, thanks, thanks, man.

• 54:21Duncan Trussell?

  Wow! It's, it's great, man. It's, it's like a, kind of like a, it's got a, a musk, of course, uh, and it's got a kind of woodland scent mixed in with like alien sea.

• 54:33Kurt Metzger?

  Okay. Are you worried about those AIs but not cum smell talk on the show for you two?

• 54:38Duncan Trussell?

  What do you mean?

• 54:39Kurt Metzger?

  It's, uh, nothing. Uh. Well. Uh, I, I.

• 54:45Duncan Trussell?

  Don't be shy. Your cum smells good, brother.

• 54:50Kurt Metzger?

  I told you that in confidence, dude.

• 54:52Duncan Trussell?

  Well, I can smell it right now.

• 54:54Kurt Metzger?

  I know, but.

• 54:55Duncan Trussell?

  Nothing confidential about it.

• 54:57Kurt Metzger?

  I just like are for me and you and not for like.

• 54:59Duncan Trussell?

  This is what those kids smelled when they opened the wardrobe in Narnia.

• 55:08Kurt Metzger?

  Um, uh, I. Look. We'll be right back.

• 55:20Duncan Trussell?

  All right, let's do.

• 55:21Kurt Metzger?

  Let's look at the, uh, we still haven't thanked MK Monarch or, or, uh, you, uh, Ultra, but really, we're well into Monarch time now. And I, and I thought uh, you know, this is, this is not a day of, uh, you know, getting upset that Duncan told people about how my cum smells. It's a day of celebrating. Okay? And, uh, so we've got some star-studded thank yous to the MK.

• 55:46Duncan Trussell?

  You gotta come to one of my men's rights groups, dude.

• 55:48Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah?

• 55:49Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, man, we smell each other's jizz all day long and no one's, you shouldn't.

• 55:52Kurt Metzger?

  That's what we lost in the West.

• 55:53Duncan Trussell?

  I'll tell you what. They have feminized us. And, and, and you know why people shake hands? Everyone's like, it's some bullshit. You don't have a weapon. In the old days, number one, women would not shake hands. Their hands would be restrained. But men, when they shook, they would have a nice coat of jizz on their palms. And you would shake a man's hand and you would smell your hand, your jizz mixed together. True fraternity, true brotherhood. And man, I gotta tell you, you, it makes me sad that you're ashamed of the beautiful, pungent, powerful smell of your own jizz.

• 56:30Kurt Metzger?

  Well, I, look, I grew up, uh, listen, I told you I grew up in Yemen.

• 56:34Duncan Trussell?

  I know.

• 56:35Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, okay.

• 56:36Duncan Trussell?

  It's not your fault.

• 56:37Kurt Metzger?

  Let's see, uh, some celebrity, uh, MKUltra thank you. And I know there's a few, we, cause Duncan, you know, Duncan's guts is so connected. He's so desired and so wanted by this industry and by the celebs. And when he put in a call and said, hey, can you put in a thank you to MKUltra?

• 56:54Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, kind of like, remember when that very mu- moving, moving moment during the pandemic? Where so many wonderful celebrities sang Imagine? Remember that?

• 57:05Kurt Metzger?

  I will never forget that.

• 57:07Duncan Trussell?

  I was so fucking terrified. There was lockdowns. No one knew what was happening. I was so scared. And then I saw that montage of celebrities singing Imagine. I gathered my whole family around. And I'll tell you, man, every morning when I woke the kids up, smack in the bar of the crib with a a broom, waking them up, play Imagine.

• 57:31Kurt Metzger?

  Well, what I liked about it, I mean, so you're afraid. There's a pandemic coming.

• 57:35Duncan Trussell?

  And these people, they fucking they, they, they put a lot of time into this, too.

• 57:41Kurt Metzger?

  And then you see Gal Gadot say, imagine there's no heaven.

• 57:44Duncan Trussell?

  Can we just play it?

• 57:45Kurt Metzger?

  What a wonderful sentiment.

• 57:46Duncan Trussell?

  Let's just play it, cause this did inspire what's coming.

• 57:49Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, play the Kyle Donegan one.

• 57:52Kurt Metzger?

  That's the best one.

• 57:53Duncan Trussell?

  I don't want to watch somebody satirizing something that really meant a lot to me and my family.

• 58:00Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 58:04Duncan Trussell?

  This is one of the great American moments.

• 58:07Kurt Metzger?

  Who's that?

• 58:08Duncan Trussell?

  Doesn't matter.

• 58:10Kurt Metzger?

  Who the fuck is that?

• 58:11Duncan Trussell?

  Doesn't matter. They're celebrities!

• 58:14Kurt Metzger?

  Shouldn't I have heard of them?

• 58:15Duncan Trussell?

  That's. Sarah Silverman?

• 58:18Kurt Metzger?

  Sarah Silverperson?

• 58:22Kurt Metzger?

  I know her.

• 58:27Duncan Trussell?

  That's Prantia.

• 58:28Kurt Metzger?

  Who's that?

• 58:29Duncan Trussell?

  Prantia.

• 58:30Kurt Metzger?

  Who?

• 58:31Duncan Trussell?

  That's, um, Watership Dean.

• 58:35Kurt Metzger?

  Oh.

• 58:38Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, that's Jimmy Dribblegips. Who's that?

• 58:48Duncan Trussell?

  Chelsea Handler.

• 58:49Kurt Metzger?

  Oh.

• 58:56Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, that's Dill Fobbins.

• 58:58Duncan Trussell?

  I love her, her work.

• 59:02Duncan Trussell?

  Yep.

• 59:05Kurt Metzger?

  Wow, Beef Well- Wellington?

• 59:08Duncan Trussell?

  Wellington.

• 59:10Kurt Metzger?

  Wow, I didn't know who was in this.

• 59:13Duncan Trussell?

  Damn it, that.

• 59:16Duncan Trussell?

  It keeps going.

• 59:19Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, uh, John B, uh.

• 59:23Duncan Trussell?

  Joe Will Ferrell!

• 59:25Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, I think that's the. Oh, what's his name? Oh.

• 59:30Duncan Trussell?

  They're celebrities, that's all you see, that's.

• 59:34Kurt Metzger?

  I love my dog, too.

• 59:39Duncan Trussell?

  All right, you guys cut it.

• 59:40Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, yeah, you can cut it. I mean, there's only so much of this I could take. I, you know.

• 59:44Duncan Trussell?

  Can you, can we?

• 59:44Kurt Metzger?

  John Lennon, I know you're a big fan of him, but I don't care.

• 59:47Duncan Trussell?

  Hold on, you got to be all sensitive when I said your jizz smelled good. Can you fucking give me a little emotional space right now?

• 59:55Kurt Metzger?

  Mm-hmm.

• 59:56Duncan Trussell?

  Can we just cut? Can we cut?

• 1:00:04Kurt Metzger?

  And now, a star-studded thank you to the MK Monarch Program.

• 1:00:10Duncan Trussell?

  Thanks for your work, gang.

• 1:00:11Speaker 06

  So, I'm a fucking whack job, as you know. And I credit the MK Monarch Program with a lot of that. So, for example, I think Jesus Christ is a kind of secretion. I mean, there's a historical guy, maybe? Who cares? The thing I believe in is secretions!

• 1:00:30Duncan Trussell?

  Ah, right. Yeah, he's so great.

• 1:00:33Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, one of the greats. That is beautiful.

• 1:00:35Duncan Trussell?

  I mean, his impressions blow my mind to this day.

• 1:00:38Speaker 05

  So I'm like, "Hey Jerry, save some cheese pizza for the rest of us, okay?" Okay, so then I'm not feeling good and like I'm watching LeBron James suck Michelle Obama's dick, and it's just like, "This feels gay." I love my gays!

• 1:00:54Duncan Trussell?

  Good for her.

• 1:00:55Kurt Metzger?

  That's nice. I didn't really make any...

• 1:00:57Duncan Trussell?

  Well, she's speaking truth to power.

• 1:01:00Kurt Metzger?

  Fair enough.

• 1:01:01Speaker 07

  A lot of people don't know this, but I come from a heavily satanic background, generational, you know? When Hunter and I would hang out, he would activate my MK programming from a list of code words. Then I would help him make snuff films.

• 1:01:20Kurt Metzger?

  Now, question, does he mean Hunter S. Thompson or Hunter Biden?

• 1:01:24Duncan Trussell?

  I don't know, it doesn't matter, he's a great actor, that's all I care about.

• 1:01:27Kurt Metzger?

  True, true! Alright, let's see who else we got.

• 1:01:30Speaker 03

  My mom told me that I would grow up to be like, the Antichrist or whatever. Then I went to these special classes under a mountain by my house, like army or whatever. Anyway, I'm supposed to like, sit upon a throne of abominations? So, that's what Feastables is, I guess?

• 1:01:49Kurt Metzger?

  No, Feastables, bud.

• 1:01:50Duncan Trussell?

  My kids love Feastables.

• 1:01:52Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:53Speaker 03

  How it works is, I collect unused prison snacks, like, really old ass shit. I wrap it up in plastic, then I call it Feastables. Then you feed it to your fat retard kids because, who gives a shit? Oh wait, I forgot, first, I do a blood ritual over each Feastable to make your kids more gay.

• 1:02:13Kurt Metzger?

  Now, how is that working out? Are your kids more gay or not?

• 1:02:16Duncan Trussell?

  Come on, he's joking.

• 1:02:18Kurt Metzger?

  Oh.

• 1:02:19Duncan Trussell?

  See, you take shit, he's just making a joke.

• 1:02:21Kurt Metzger?

  Look, I'm here to thank MK Ultra and MK Monarch.

• 1:02:23Duncan Trussell?

  I know, but you can't, like, yes, if you take everything Mr. Beast says, literally, it's like he's making, clearly making a joke.

• 1:02:31Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, well, because this is a great country.

• 1:02:33Duncan Trussell?

  And if he is recycling prison snacks, is that, "Oh, let's crucify Mr. Beast for another great thing he did for the world." "He heals the blind, Mr. Beast raised the fucking dead in Serbia, do you know about that?"

• 1:02:47Kurt Metzger?

  You know, when you say it like that, he does sound like the Antichrist.

• 1:02:48Duncan Trussell?

  He went through a fucking pit where they buried bodies from that war and he raised the dead.

• 1:02:54Kurt Metzger?

  Really?

• 1:02:55Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, and everyone's on his ass.

• 1:02:57Kurt Metzger?

  How did the dead person look?

• 1:02:59Duncan Trussell?

  I don't, not great, man, they'd been down there a while, but, that's not the point. Oh, this is what I'm talking about, though, I don't want, I don't mean, I don't want to argue with you. But this is, it's never enough. It's like he raised the fucking dead, yeah, some of their, some of them are still, like, they decompose, man. Fucking, they can wrap them or something.

• 1:03:19Kurt Metzger?

  Are you good?

• 1:03:21Duncan Trussell?

  I'm fine, I'm sorry, man.

• 1:03:22Kurt Metzger?

  Let's just take a break real quick, because it's getting weird.

• 1:03:24Duncan Trussell?

  No, I'm sorry, Kurt.

• 1:03:31Duncan Trussell?

  So, wow.

• 1:03:33Kurt Metzger?

  Wow, let's hear some more great celebrity thank yous to MK Monarch.

• 1:03:37Speaker 04

  When I really think about it, a momager is just a pimp. So, my mom is my pimp. Wow, that is so dark.

• 1:03:45Kurt Metzger?

  Not exactly a thank you, but, okay, noted, noted.

• 1:03:48Duncan Trussell?

  She could have tried a little harder for that.

• 1:03:50Speaker 05

  Am I a human trafficker? Uh, what? What? Bitch? You dare to enter this sacred dojo on your period, just to ask bullshit? And I ask you, ever deliver pizzas? Or worked at a pizza place?

• 1:04:04Kurt Metzger?

  Yes.

• 1:04:04Speaker 05

  Or called in a pizza, and picked it up and ate it out?

• 1:04:07Duncan Trussell?

  Love pizza.

• 1:04:07Speaker 05

  Does that make you a pizza trafficker bitch?

• 1:04:09Kurt Metzger?

  Oh shit, he just blew my fucking mind.

• 1:04:11Duncan Trussell?

  Dude, that's a smackdown.

• 1:04:14Kurt Metzger?

  Wow, he's a kickbox, he's a kickpuncher in the verbal arena as well.

• 1:04:19Duncan Trussell?

  Dude.

• 1:04:19Kurt Metzger?

  As the octagon.

• 1:04:20Duncan Trussell?

  Well, he's like, quintessentially like, the archetype for masculinity.

• 1:04:24Kurt Metzger?

  I know, I wish I took fucking, I wish I took fuckboxing classes, dude.

• 1:04:28Duncan Trussell?

  Protect Andrew Tate at all costs, enough said.

• 1:04:32Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, enough said, enough. Okay, well, who else, who else wants to thank MK?

• 1:04:37Speaker 04

  Looking back now, it is kinda weird that Kanye's personal trainer had like, power of attorney? I mean, what the fuck? It's like, "Oh, the bitch who does my nails decides who gets custody of my kids." Like, that crazy, if that makes sense?

• 1:04:51Kurt Metzger?

  No, it doesn't make sense.

• 1:04:52Duncan Trussell?

  Nothing you say makes sense.

• 1:04:54Kurt Metzger?

  What a twat she is, dude. His personal trainer has power of attorney because people care about Kanye, you stupid bitch.

• 1:05:01Duncan Trussell?

  He does, if you don't trust your personal trainer enough to give power of attorney, then why the fuck are you letting him teach you how to do kettlebells?

• 1:05:07Kurt Metzger?

  Yo, my Pilates guy could have me committed at any moment.

• 1:05:10Duncan Trussell?

  My fucking trainer had me committed for a month.

• 1:05:13Kurt Metzger?

  And luckily for me, he doesn't, not only does he not have me committed, he does not teach me Pilates.

• 1:05:18Duncan Trussell?

  Great guy, great.

• 1:05:20Kurt Metzger?

  Let's move on.

• 1:05:22Duncan Trussell?

  I mean, Pilates, we all know Pilates.

• 1:05:25Speaker 04

  Keeping up with the Kardashians? Oh yeah, let me definitely keep up. Okay, step one, my mom sells a porno of me. Woo, slow down, I'm getting a cramp. What in the actual fuck? Is everybody fucking crazy?

• 1:05:38Kurt Metzger?

  Yep, she sounds like an ingrate.

• 1:05:40Duncan Trussell?

  She sounds like she needs to give her, she needs a little time in the, in the kookoo house.

• 1:05:45Kurt Metzger?

  In the booth. A little bit of time.

• 1:05:48Duncan Trussell?

  It's a lot of pressure to be a Kardashian.

• 1:05:50Kurt Metzger?

  You know, maybe she should, she should make, take some time to smell something positive like my jizz. Okay, let's see something else.

• 1:05:57Duncan Trussell?

  I know you're making a sarcastic joke there, but you shouldn't, you're just...

• 1:06:01Kurt Metzger?

  That's all the ones you got? That's it?

• 1:06:03Duncan Trussell?

  You're inviting, I just, I don't want to end on talking about your jizz, but you're jizz shaming.

• 1:06:09Kurt Metzger?

  What, what do you mean?

• 1:06:10Duncan Trussell?

  By making a sarcastic joke about the smell of your own jizz, you're jizz shaming. It just happens in colleges across the country right now, because in a lot of initiation rituals and fraternities, there is something involving jizz.

• 1:06:23Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, cum shamed, is that in the Urban Dictionary?

• 1:06:25Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, don't cum shame.

• 1:06:26Kurt Metzger?

  Let's see, "Last night, I invited Teddy over..."

• 1:06:29Duncan Trussell?

  After being turned down to swallow a cum load, it's cum shaming.

• 1:06:32Kurt Metzger?

  Hold on, I just want to know what the, what the, on the street, you know, I just want to know what the kids are calling it. Feeling embarrassed after being turned down to swallow a cum, oh no, so that's...

• 1:06:42Duncan Trussell?

  Can you read the example, just read that, please? And don't make a joke about it, read the example right underneath, they highlighted, just please read that, and try not to make one of your sarcastic Rogan Sphere-style jokes.

• 1:06:53Kurt Metzger?

  Well, because...

• 1:06:54Duncan Trussell?

  Just read it.

• 1:06:55Kurt Metzger?

  "Last night, I invited Teddy over for a blow and go, okay? When he got to my place, fucking dude cum shamed me, saying he didn't want me to, to feed, he didn't want to feed me his load." So this is if you want someone to feed you a load, and then they go, you're not good enough.

• 1:07:11Duncan Trussell?

  And I'll tell you this, people like you making insensitive jokes, it leads to cum shaming. So probably someone who watched this, someone will be like, "Please let me just drink your jizz, bro." And he's gonna be like, "No, man, it's weird, it doesn't, I'm ashamed of my jizz."

• 1:07:27Kurt Metzger?

  Well, I'm not shaming my jizz, I'm just...

• 1:07:28Duncan Trussell?

  You're just causing harm.

• 1:07:30Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, well, I don't know, uh, look, uh, I don't know what the bottom line is. I, I, we're here today to celebrate a great thing.

• 1:07:41Duncan Trussell?

  Imagine if Pablo Picasso was ashamed of his paintings? And your jizz is the Picasso of jizz, I've never smelled anything like it.

• 1:07:48Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, but in fairness, most of his paintings, you know, the canvas is not somebody's throat.

• 1:07:57Duncan Trussell?

  That's a really poetic thing to say. And sometimes the canvas is a throat, and sometimes the canvas is the mind. And this is why we must thank the great people who brought us MK Ultra and all the wonderful, not just like, psychological technologies that came from it.

• 1:08:13Kurt Metzger?

  The Nazis?

• 1:08:14Duncan Trussell?

  What?

• 1:08:14Kurt Metzger?

  The Nazis?

• 1:08:15Duncan Trussell?

  Why would, why do you bring up them?

• 1:08:17Kurt Metzger?

  Well, we got it from them.

• 1:08:19Duncan Trussell?

  Okay, well, that, why don't you save that?

• 1:08:21Kurt Metzger?

  I'm being a little bit too...

• 1:08:22Duncan Trussell?

  Save it for Infowars, this is the mystery boys, we fucking, we tell the truth. And I want to thank all of you out there who are still working in any kind of mind control program in the federal government, thank you for what you did.

• 1:08:36Kurt Metzger?

  I don't call it mind control, I call it a mind safety program. And I, and I think that's what gets lost here, Duncan. This is about security, securing your mind, keeping it right. Uh, what, do you want to live in some of these communist countries where they tell you what to do and think? Or do you want to live in a country that we, you know, they, you don't get to know that they're doing that to you?

• 1:08:58Duncan Trussell?

  You know what? That was so powerful, I feel like I'm watching Life, Liberty and Levin.

• 1:09:04Kurt Metzger?

  What's, oh, with David Levin?

• 1:09:06Duncan Trussell?

  He's amazing.

• 1:09:07Kurt Metzger?

  Oh yeah, do you have the BB, uh, I think we have a BB club for David Levin. Boy, David Levin is... Hey, it's BB. Just wanted to say, great job lying on behalf of Israel. Great news, we're almost done killing all the children in Gaza. Soon you can stop blathering retarded shit like the woke right. I know you must feel like a real cunt, and you are, but we're almost done killing those kids.

• 1:09:31Duncan Trussell?

  We'll see you next week! Thanks for tuning in to the mystery boys.

• 1:09:36Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah!

• 1:09:50Kurt Metzger?

  Oh my God, what a nightmare. Uh, yeah, that was a little bit of a time quake at the end of that episode, you'll notice and I'm still

• 1:09:57Duncan Trussell?

  Never get used to that.

• 1:09:58Kurt Metzger?

  That's why I thought he was dead.

• 1:09:59Duncan Trussell?

  A million years.

• 1:10:00Kurt Metzger?

  To me for talking to Hunter Biden without me. Now, what a great

• 1:10:04Duncan Trussell?

  I was just in an abyss.

• 1:10:05Kurt Metzger?

  What a great first episode. What an amazing first episode of Mystery Boys, and I'm so glad that you guys could be here with it to watch it for our 10th episode.

• 1:10:14Duncan Trussell?

  Hey, speaking of quakes, if you're living in Columbia, uh, there's gonna be a big old earthquake. Just saw it on the news.

• 1:10:21Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, about three years ago, depending on when this airs. Now, up next, the final episode of Mystery Boys. Now, this is a big one, and I didn't understand, you know, it's very hard to keep this shit straight, Duncan, uh, with, with having the only podcast that's literally outside of time and space.

• 1:10:39Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:10:39Kurt Metzger?

  Don't try to pin us down as to when it took place.

• 1:10:42Duncan Trussell?

  Don't tie me to your temporal continuum. Fuck you, Times Arrow.

• 1:10:46Kurt Metzger?

  That's why you live how you live and I live how I live, as a guy with fancy auragoggles.

• 1:10:50Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:10:51Kurt Metzger?

  I could tell, I, oh, did you not, did PayPal fuck up your auragoggle shipment? Well, I could text Laura at the Museum of Terror and get it taken care of. Can you?

• 1:11:00Duncan Trussell?

  Can you do that?

• 1:11:00Kurt Metzger?

  I'm on the Epstein Island list, motherfucker. Well, not the island, but I'm in the files. And, uh,

• 1:11:06Duncan Trussell?

  Hell, yeah, you are.

• 1:11:07Kurt Metzger?

  Okay.

• 1:11:08Duncan Trussell?

  And you should have been in a war.

• 1:11:10Kurt Metzger?

  I ate three live babies on that island. I hated it, but I didn't want to seem poor. And I didn't want to seem like a gory.

• 1:11:15Duncan Trussell?

  You did nothing wrong. You did what you had to do.

• 1:11:17Kurt Metzger?

  Okay. And now, the final episode, uh, of Mystery Boys, uh, and then Duncan dies after this one and not, you know, now when you, uh, were back.

• 1:11:30Duncan Trussell?

  We all die after this one.

• 1:11:32Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, I think you guys will be dead after it. Maybe you don't watch it till you're older.

• 1:11:38Duncan Trussell?

  Which you are.

• 1:11:39Kurt Metzger?

  We have the formula to end this war. Oh, my God. Alright, so I could, because I have my goggles, I saw ghosts.

• 1:11:49Duncan Trussell?

  Hello and welcome to The Mystery Boys. My name is Garvin Slinks.

• 1:11:57Kurt Metzger?

  And I'm

• 1:11:59Duncan Trussell?

  God damn it.

• 1:12:01Kurt Metzger?

  I'm Judge Astronaut Kerp Mibsker.

• 1:12:05Duncan Trussell?

  And you are watching the premiere anti-mystery information show available on YouTube today. We're here to clear out the cluttered Marie Kondo your life and get all those pesky weird ideas you had out of your head, like little orphan chimney sweeps.

• 1:12:22Kurt Metzger?

  We're not here really to solve mysteries. We're kind of cause mysteries, which that doesn't sound good, actually, now that I'm saying it.

• 1:12:28Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, well, I don't think it's bad to cause mysteries or to solve

• 1:12:31Kurt Metzger?

  Is that not what crime does?

• 1:12:32Duncan Trussell?

  A mystery causer is a criminal, isn't it?

• 1:12:36Kurt Metzger?

  I don't like to think, I don't think I'm running a mystery academy more so than a

• 1:12:42Duncan Trussell?

  We're generating mysteries for you to solve. I mean, the real question is, what are we?

• 1:12:46Kurt Metzger?

  Where's all this cocaine coming in from is the mystery?

• 1:12:49Duncan Trussell?

  Nobody fucking knows.

• 1:12:50Kurt Metzger?

  And you're welcome.

• 1:12:51Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, no shit.

• 1:12:54Kurt Metzger?

  Who's smuggling these microchips to the Chinese?

• 1:12:57Duncan Trussell?

  Give me a break. This is the sort of thing, for example, you've probably heard the CIA's been found multiple times shipping in tons of cocaine.

• 1:13:06Kurt Metzger?

  Well, I say give them another chance.

• 1:13:07Duncan Trussell?

  Why not? No, seriously.

• 1:13:09Kurt Metzger?

  What is Christ Ellis? Forgive your brother, the CIA.

• 1:13:12Duncan Trussell?

  By the way, do you know the number one manufacturer of cocaine in the United States legally?

• 1:13:20Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, is it RG, uh, like Bayer or something?

• 1:13:23Duncan Trussell?

  Coca-Cola. Coca-Cola.

• 1:13:25Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, still?

• 1:13:26Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah. Can you look up Coca-Cola cocoa leaves imports?

• 1:13:31Kurt Metzger?

  Well, I thought

• 1:13:32Duncan Trussell?

  I don't mean to do a spoiler right at the beginning of our show, but yeah, if you want to track the source of all evil on this planet, it's directly in Coca-Cola. They, they're the only ones who are allowed to get these cocoa leaves. Yeah. Is the, yeah. You know, that's, isn't that cool? Legally import cocoa leaves.

• 1:13:51Kurt Metzger?

  Now, how do they?

• 1:13:52Duncan Trussell?

  These leaves are processed to create a de-coconized flavoring ingredient. In other words, they ruin the cocaine and put it in

• 1:13:59Kurt Metzger?

  So you're telling me if I was in the upper levels of management of Coca-Cola?

• 1:14:02Duncan Trussell?

  You can get blow.

• 1:14:02Kurt Metzger?

  I could get the old school coke.

• 1:14:04Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, look, while the extracted cocaine is sold to Mallinckrodt, i.e. for medicinal use.

• 1:14:10Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, well, I was gonna say, well, that's what I figured because, uh, and this is like a real kind of, you know, state-run capitalism kind of enterprise with Big Pharma, because when you have these illegal drugs like this, that's why you don't have to have fair competition for so many things.

• 1:14:24Duncan Trussell?

  No. Coca-Cola produces $3 billion worth of pure cocaine, pure per year.

• 1:14:31Kurt Metzger?

  So where, that medical, what was the company called?

• 1:14:33Duncan Trussell?

  It's medical cocaine.

• 1:14:34Kurt Metzger?

  I know. Yeah. Look, I've never had medical cocaine, but if someone offered it to me, I want to tell everybody the answer is yes.

• 1:14:40Duncan Trussell?

  It's medical cocaine and for sure.

• 1:14:42Kurt Metzger?

  You know, somebody gets you medical, that's what Rob, Bob Evans got busted for, and in True Romance, the movie, they just make it really good cocaine, but it's about Bob Evans. He was getting the Elvis cocaine, which was liquid cocaine that is pure, the kind Diddy was rumored to be smuggling on his private jets with his, uh, butt slaves.

• 1:15:01Duncan Trussell?

  I'm pretty sure if you just put cocaine in any kind of liquid, it turns into liquid cocaine.

• 1:15:04Kurt Metzger?

  No, no, no, no, no. This is pure, like, this is like pure Sherlock Holmes grade. Like, if you could get this kind

• 1:15:12Duncan Trussell?

  Freud blow. This is what Freud was injecting into his dick.

• 1:15:16Kurt Metzger?

  This is how Freud tackled the problem of gaslighting rich American victims that babies kind of wanted.

• 1:15:21Duncan Trussell?

  Well, yep, 100%.

• 1:15:23Kurt Metzger?

  Liquid cocaine.

• 1:15:24Duncan Trussell?

  How much cocaine is in Nantucket Sewage? A lot.

• 1:15:27Kurt Metzger?

  There was an old man from Nantucket. I can't remember the rest, but you could fill it in.

• 1:15:33Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, this is, so this is sort of the, the entry point for cocaine into the United States. Like, all the people in submarines, hull and blow, these are low-level players in the cocaine game where Coca-Cola is at the very top. If you've been sipping Coke, Coca-Cola, you're essentially participating in one of the largest cocaine cartels on the planet.

• 1:15:56Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, so I am cool. See, mother?

• 1:16:02Duncan Trussell?

  And this is where our country has gotten to, because when we had sensible drug laws

• 1:16:06Kurt Metzger?

  Cocaine is the problem.

• 1:16:07Duncan Trussell?

  No, I'm saying the lack of it is the problem. Like, they used to put it into Coca-Cola. That was normal. That's why they call it Coca-Cola.

• 1:16:15Kurt Metzger?

  I don't mean to counter Dicky with science right now, Duncan, but, um, I can't say cocaine's helping Zelensky, you know?

• 1:16:21Duncan Trussell?

  Well, look.

• 1:16:22Kurt Metzger?

  I can't say Ukraine is doing well because he's on coke.

• 1:16:24Duncan Trussell?

  You give a man a fucking hammer, he's gonna either like make something great with it or hit himself in the face. Like, you, what do you want me to?

• 1:16:31Kurt Metzger?

  Or suck a guy's dick.

• 1:16:33Duncan Trussell?

  Or both.

• 1:16:34Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah.

• 1:16:35Duncan Trussell?

  Which is

• 1:16:36Kurt Metzger?

  Because the vasoconstriction, that's why your bone, that's why it gets to your boners.

• 1:16:42Duncan Trussell?

  But it's sort of like, you know, we, there's printers that print money and everyone just assumes that that money is like, doesn't just go to people working in the money printing factory.

• 1:16:52Kurt Metzger?

  Well, okay, look, the interesting part of this to me is like, they make $300 billion worth of cocaine, goes to foreign medical researchers.

• 1:16:57Duncan Trussell?

  Yes.

• 1:16:58Kurt Metzger?

  The rest of it, I imagine, is going to the tippy top of the tippy top for their elite personal use, such as your president's.

• 1:17:04Duncan Trussell?

  Of course.

• 1:17:05Kurt Metzger?

  Poppy Bush had a ketamine, like one of those things to mist ketamine into your nostrils. He had that for cocaine in the 90s.

• 1:17:12Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah. Yeah, I do want to reiterate that you could take any, most nasal sprays and mix any kind of powder in it and it works. It's not like high tech at all. I mean,

• 1:17:23Kurt Metzger?

  It's the purity of the cocaine. So, yeah, you could get whatever cocaine and purify it, but I don't know how much cocaine is left.

• 1:17:29Duncan Trussell?

  Can you please look up, how do you manufacture cocaine? Let's take a look and see what the process is here.

• 1:17:34Kurt Metzger?

  Hmm. Let's go to the science. How do we make some?

• 1:17:37Duncan Trussell?

  Hmm. Let's see here. Manufacturing cocaine is an illegal activity.

• 1:17:44Kurt Metzger?

  I didn't ask about the legality of it.

• 1:17:49Duncan Trussell?

  Is not possible. Well, that's incredible. You can't even find out how to do it on an AI overview. That's amazing.

• 1:17:55Kurt Metzger?

  Will you please bring up the golden Trump statue right now, speaking of cocaine?

• 1:17:58Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, let's go ahead and pull. That is something you think up on cocaine.

• 1:18:04Duncan Trussell?

  I mean, that is the stupidest shit I've ever seen in my life.

• 1:18:07Kurt Metzger?

  Let's see here.

• 1:18:08Duncan Trussell?

  Is there any way to enlarge that? I don't have my glasses.

• 1:18:11Kurt Metzger?

  Yes, I can't quite make it out.

• 1:18:12Duncan Trussell?

  Is he wearing it? He's, oh, he's wearing his Trump, his MAGA hat. Is it, it's not real gold, though, right?

• 1:18:18Kurt Metzger?

  Yes, it's a real gold statue.

• 1:18:19Duncan Trussell?

  No, it is not.

• 1:18:22Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, let's see.

• 1:18:25Duncan Trussell?

  Can you look up and see if that statue is, is actual gold?

• 1:18:31Duncan Trussell?

  Seems like a liability to have a giant gold statue on your property.

• 1:18:34Kurt Metzger?

  I'm telling you, it's, it's the real deal.

• 1:18:37Duncan Trussell?

  It's not solid gold. It's made of bronze and covered in a thick layer of gold leaf. Made by sculptor Alan Catrill. Um, can we look up?

• 1:18:45Kurt Metzger?

  Good as gold.

• 1:18:46Duncan Trussell?

  Can we look up Alan Catrill?

• 1:18:48Kurt Metzger?

  Why?

• 1:18:49Duncan Trussell?

  I'm just curious how you get the job. There he is.

• 1:18:57Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, well, he's the least important part of this. I don't know why you go to that.

• 1:18:59Duncan Trussell?

  No, well, you just, it's curious. How do you get that deal?

• 1:19:02Kurt Metzger?

  See, this is because you're thinking about this in a materialist level. Will you go back to the article, please?

• 1:19:05Duncan Trussell?

  Yes, I am.

• 1:19:06Kurt Metzger?

  I wonder how they used a lathe, or did they just?

• 1:19:10Duncan Trussell?

  Can you pull up how to make? How to make gold?

• 1:19:13Kurt Metzger?

  Where are the mechanics? Don't, do not pull that out. Let's go back to the thing. Let's get to the point.

• 1:19:17Duncan Trussell?

  Has anyone figured that out yet?

• 1:19:18Kurt Metzger?

  It's not called the boredom boys. Okay? It's not called the ASMR. Let's, let's, let's snap this off, Dave.

• 1:19:25Duncan Trussell?

  Can you pull up where is gold on the periodic table of the elements?

• 1:19:28Kurt Metzger?

  I beg of you to not pull that up. Okay, now let me read this goddamn article. How do you make gold? Okay. Uh, let's see. Giant gold statue. Where is? So, we go to the picture, please, so I can point to these. Oh, I need the picture of all the pastor who made it and the Jews with him worshiping it like the golden calf.

• 1:19:51Kurt Metzger?

  So, a lot of these magazines, leftist, uh, leaning, you know, far left magazines, like, oh. Uh, well, how come they're doing the golden calf?

• 1:20:01Duncan Trussell?

  That's what they said?

• 1:20:03Kurt Metzger?

  I mean, it's very close to the golden calf, I gotta say. And it's a pastor who did this. Okay? So.

• 1:20:10Duncan Trussell?

  His, his city Jews behind Florida's giant golden Trump statue.

• 1:20:14Kurt Metzger?

  Right, and one pastor named John Mark Burns. Okay, now John Mark, Mark Burns. Uh, is, uh, yeah, good old Johnny Mark Burns. Pastor.

• 1:20:26Duncan Trussell?

  Okay, what about him?

• 1:20:28Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, that's great. Oh, it was a black guy who made this. So I didn't even realize that. Uh, he's a black pastor. Uh, he's, he's one of those Seven Mountains mandate motherfuckers. You know what the Seven Mountains are?

• 1:20:38Duncan Trussell?

  No.

• 1:20:39Kurt Metzger?

  They're the same exact goddamn thing as the Alice Bailey Seven Rays of Lucifer, is what they are.

• 1:20:43Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, okay.

• 1:20:45Kurt Metzger?

  Dominionist theology you've heard of, where God needs us to go take over the spheres of influence, government. Right?

• 1:20:52Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, yeah, sure, sure. It's like what Scientology did. It's like the infiltration of government structure.

• 1:20:56Kurt Metzger?

  That's exactly what it is.

• 1:20:57Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:20:57Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, so, I finally, after a lot of wrestling with Grok, and I got to pretend to be a character named Doctor Science, who doesn't try to be conscientious or balanced, because I'm not interested in that.

• 1:21:07Duncan Trussell?

  Right, right.

• 1:21:08Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, okay. So, golden calf, not specifically, but it is an occult idol. In Seven Mountains NAR, that's new apostolic reign, meaning there's gonna be new apostles appearing on the earth?

• 1:21:19Duncan Trussell?

  Yes.

• 1:21:19Kurt Metzger?

  And they can start adding shit to the Bible, just like the Romans.

• 1:21:22Duncan Trussell?

  What? Are you, that would be so fun!

• 1:21:25Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, it, it, yeah, it looks like it's fun.

• 1:21:27Duncan Trussell?

  How do you know if one, if you're one of the apostles? I mean, could we be one? Is it possible you could be one?

• 1:21:32Kurt Metzger?

  You get anointed by a current apostle, so don't worry. You have to be initiated into this mystery.

• 1:21:37Duncan Trussell?

  There's a current apostle right now that can rewrite the Bible.

• 1:21:39Kurt Metzger?

  The original guy was John Branham out of Ca- out of, uh, Canada.

• 1:21:42Duncan Trussell?

  Let's pull him up, John Branham. So this is an actual new apostle of Jesus. He could write the, if he wanted to.

• 1:21:48Kurt Metzger?

  Branham, U M. No, no, not Branham.

• 1:21:52Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, wait.

• 1:21:53Duncan Trussell?

  He's a-

• 1:21:53Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Let, let, let-

• 1:21:55Duncan Trussell?

  Maybe look up John Branham apostle?

• 1:21:57Kurt Metzger?

  It, it's not John, it's William Branham, but, but, don't, don't go off on a thing, I, because I'm gonna, I'm gonna tell you what that, what the whole purpose of that statue is.

• 1:22:06Kurt Metzger?

  There, just go back to the statue, okay? Okay.

• 1:22:09Duncan Trussell?

  Hey, can you zoom in on his dick? I'm just curious.

• 1:22:11Kurt Metzger?

  Let's get a close up on the dick, please. Do I have to ask?

• 1:22:13Duncan Trussell?

  Cause like-

• 1:22:14Kurt Metzger?

  I'd like to see the dick of this ad. Thank you.

• 1:22:16Duncan Trussell?

  Look at-

• 1:22:17Kurt Metzger?

  Wow, thanks!

• 1:22:18Duncan Trussell?

  Zoom in further, holy shit! Look at that lump.

• 1:22:22Kurt Metzger?

  Now, you look right at that while I tell you this. It's an occult. It's an occult idol. In Seven Mountains theology, the gover- the government, government mountain must be conquered. So they climbed Mount Government.

• 1:22:34Duncan Trussell?

  That's so stupid.

• 1:22:35Kurt Metzger?

  Trump, so that's what this statue is commemorating. Trump is their Cyrus figure, the pagan king God uses to restore the kingdom. Erecting a giant golden image of the political Messiah on his own property is a ritual declaration. This mountain now belongs to us. Golden calf parallels are exact, molten image for a leader instead of God. Uh, but rebranded as honors. Uh, same Patterson, pattern as Alice Bailey Seven Rays. Use symbolic power centers to ship, shift global energy towards the plan. What's the larger plan? NAR theo- theosophical? Theosophy? You know that?

• 1:23:10Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:23:11Kurt Metzger?

  Infiltration of Christianity, the Lucius Trust.

• 1:23:13Duncan Trussell?

  Like, like Blotavsky? That's what you're talking about, like?

• 1:23:16Kurt Metzger?

  I, I say her name right, Blavatsky, but I'm gonna say it how you said it.

• 1:23:19Duncan Trussell?

  I've been saying Blotavsky forever.

• 1:23:20Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, Madame Blotavsky is the way. I will be saying it from now on.

• 1:23:23Duncan Trussell?

  Blavatsky?

• 1:23:24Kurt Metzger?

  That's her actual name.

• 1:23:24Duncan Trussell?

  Okay, hold on. Help me connect these dots. Madame Blavatsky is connected to Trump's golden statue via some strange group of pastors who are attempting to infiltrate all levels of-

• 1:23:39Kurt Metzger?

  They're not a strange group, they're the majority of evangelical pastors in America, and they come out of Kansas City. Well, now, now go to William Branham.

• 1:23:46Duncan Trussell?

  Wait, how are they connected to theosophy, though?

• 1:23:49Kurt Metzger?

  Because whenever you hear the Seven Mountains, think of Alice Bailey, the externalization of the hierarchy person.

• 1:23:56Duncan Trussell?

  Wait, hold on, no, I'm, I can't do this with you. Just because I'm a people pleaser, I say I know what you're talking about, because I don't want to seem dumb, so no.

• 1:24:04Kurt Metzger?

  She's a Blavat, a Blotav, excuse me, Blotavsky student.

• 1:24:06Duncan Trussell?

  Okay, so, okay, so, take me from-

• 1:24:08Kurt Metzger?

  Helena Blotavsky.

• 1:24:10Duncan Trussell?

  Blavatsky, why, why don't you say it right? It's Blavatsky. Take me, take me from-

• 1:24:15Kurt Metzger?

  She's like Lisa Trager, don't she?

• 1:24:16Duncan Trussell?

  Take me from her to these pastors.

• 1:24:20Kurt Metzger?

  Look at Madame Lisa Trager!

• 1:24:21Duncan Trussell?

  Madame Blavatsky.

• 1:24:24Kurt Metzger?

  Can we just see Lisa Trager next door? Come on.

• 1:24:27Duncan Trussell?

  Why? Pull up Lisa Trager.

• 1:24:29Kurt Metzger?

  It's Lisa with a Z and, like, yeah. There's, there's Blavatsky right there.

• 1:24:38Duncan Trussell?

  That is fucking wild. Still alive, they, they hide themselves as celebrities.

• 1:24:44Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, we just had a side by side of, we found another one. Another set of clothes.

• 1:24:48Duncan Trussell?

  Have you ever done this one? Pull up Hunter S. Thompson next to the Dalai Lama. You ever done this one? It's fucking wild.

• 1:24:54Kurt Metzger?

  I have, well, just now, when you said their names together and realized that's exactly right.

• 1:24:58Duncan Trussell?

  It's in, it's fucking insane. Look.

• 1:25:02Duncan Trussell?

  How crazy is that?

• 1:25:04Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah.

• 1:25:04Duncan Trussell?

  How crazy? But there's an explanation for this. You ever heard the explanation for this? That like, sometimes like the same soul incarnates in all these different bodies? That Hunter S. Thompson was one of the manifestations of the Avalokita Shivaara Buddha?

• 1:25:17Kurt Metzger?

  Well, that would explain why he made snuff films.

• 1:25:19Duncan Trussell?

  Do you really believe that? That, you said that, I don't accept it.

• 1:25:22Kurt Metzger?

  Why?

• 1:25:23Duncan Trussell?

  Cause I love Hunter S. Thompson, I love his writing.

• 1:25:25Kurt Metzger?

  Well, instead of, who would want to believe that about a thing they like, but I, I'll tell you why I believe it, and has nothing to do with any pizza gates or nothing. Did you, oh, did we replay that? Well, uh, uh, the dude from Jackass, the main guy?

• 1:25:39Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:25:40Kurt Metzger?

  Is talking about, uh, meeting Hunter S. Thompson, and how they're hanging out with him?

• 1:25:45Duncan Trussell?

  No.

• 1:25:46Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, what's his name? Johnny Knoxville, Hunter S. Thompson?

• 1:25:48Duncan Trussell?

  Can we, wait, wait, let's get to this. I want, we, let's finish the point, though. Otherwise, we go ADHD mode. Help me connect the dots. Theosophy.

• 1:25:56Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, so theosophy, what is it? It's syncretism. You know what syncretism is?

• 1:26:00Duncan Trussell?

  Yes. But tell them in case they don't know.

• 1:26:03Kurt Metzger?

  Okay.

• 1:26:05Kurt Metzger?

  Tanner? Here's-

• 1:26:09Duncan Trussell?

  Look at that dick!

• 1:26:10Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, so, as you know, the goal of the, uh, one world religion has been around for as long as the goal of the one world government, which-

• 1:26:17Duncan Trussell?

  Okay, sure.

• 1:26:18Kurt Metzger?

  Nobody should go, that's a conspiracy. They literally, in those words, call it the New World Order. Alex Jones didn't make it up. It's a thing they've all talked about.

• 1:26:27Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:26:27Kurt Metzger?

  They still talk about it. Shut the fuck up, so.

• 1:26:30Duncan Trussell?

  There's a great ministry song that uses Bush talking about-

• 1:26:33Kurt Metzger?

  Over and over again, a new world order.

• 1:26:35Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:26:36Kurt Metzger?

  And at the time, I didn't think about it, or think it was a big deal.

• 1:26:38Duncan Trussell?

  It's on the dollar-

• 1:26:40Kurt Metzger?

  A thousand points of light.

• 1:26:41Duncan Trussell?

  Novus Ordo Seculorum, New Order of the Ages.

• 1:26:44Kurt Metzger?

  A thousand points of light.

• 1:26:46Duncan Trussell?

  A thousand points of light.

• 1:26:47Kurt Metzger?

  A new Lucifer everywhere you look.

• 1:26:49Duncan Trussell?

  Okay, wait, hold on, hold on. So a thousand points of light means what?

• 1:26:54Kurt Metzger?

  I forget, but it, it connects this, but it's not that point.

• 1:26:57Duncan Trussell?

  But this has its roots, so, so-

• 1:27:00Kurt Metzger?

  This has its roots in theosophy, which is, uh, basically the westernization of Eastern occult.

• 1:27:05Duncan Trussell?

  Okay, got it.

• 1:27:06Kurt Metzger?

  So Blavatsky and Rudolf Steiner, and all the, well, he's a student of her that broke away.

• 1:27:10Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:27:11Kurt Metzger?

  All these British occultists come, they're all like, I went to India and I talked to the yogi Jamashmashi, and he fucking- Or, an invisible chief appeared to them, right?

• 1:27:20Duncan Trussell?

  Sure.

• 1:27:21Kurt Metzger?

  Now, this, this theme, keep in mind, of the angel appearing to them. We got Joseph Smith, we got, Blavatsky had a, an invisible Arab or something.

• 1:27:30Duncan Trussell?

  Right.

• 1:27:30Kurt Metzger?

  That always, and, and Grok, Doctor Science Grok, not Grok, suggested to me that these are handlers, all of them, they fought, because I asked it to look for these patterns.

• 1:27:39Duncan Trussell?

  Like interdimensional handlers for-

• 1:27:41Kurt Metzger?

  No, a guy doing mind control on you, that-

• 1:27:43Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, you said, he's like, in trick you.

• 1:27:45Kurt Metzger?

  If I could control your mind, dude, right? Which I can.

• 1:27:48Duncan Trussell?

  Do it.

• 1:27:51Duncan Trussell?

  Wait, stop. No, really. Stop controlling my mind.

• 1:27:55Duncan Trussell?

  It's horrible. Don't do that.

• 1:27:57Kurt Metzger?

  I release thee.

• 1:27:58Duncan Trussell?

  Thank you. God, that felt weird.

• 1:27:59Kurt Metzger?

  I forgot to take, to take Duncan off controlled.

• 1:28:03Duncan Trussell?

  Thank you. Please don't do that again.

• 1:28:05Kurt Metzger?

  So I can, I can put whatever the fuck I want in your head and unless I have access to a ride at Disney World that will take you underground with a huge set and I get access to you when you're like a five year old, I do whatever I want to you in there, right? And then I traumatize you and you have to figure and, and then you're in the subconscious mind, what story is going to be there? It was dreamlike imagery.

• 1:28:26Duncan Trussell?

  And Donald Duck.

• 1:28:27Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, yeah. Then Donald Duck drank this girl's blood in front of me.

• 1:28:30Duncan Trussell?

  Donald Duck's ass.

• 1:28:32Kurt Metzger?

  Then I had to eat his ass. You're right. It was a black sun ritual. Now, it sounds like a dream or schizophrenia, don't it? And the younger you are, that's where it really is useful to have people dressed up like fun cartoon characters.

• 1:28:44Duncan Trussell?

  Right.

• 1:28:44Kurt Metzger?

  Cause I mean, just imagine what the fuck you do to kids' heads with that shit.

• 1:28:48Duncan Trussell?

  Right.

• 1:28:48Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, that's right. Um, I like to go including from Disney. Like surely Disney wouldn't be involved in this.

• 1:28:54Duncan Trussell?

  Investigation found 27 cruise ship workers, including from Disney, engaged with child photography. What the fuck? On a Disney cruise?

• 1:29:03Kurt Metzger?

  Does everybody think it was just the Catholic Church that one time that had an issue with this? I think they do. I think they think it was just a Vatican thing.

• 1:29:10Duncan Trussell?

  Right.

• 1:29:10Kurt Metzger?

  Everybody else.

• 1:29:11Duncan Trussell?

  Right.

• 1:29:12Kurt Metzger?

  Does isn't from religion to obviously things that you take kids to.

• 1:29:18Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, sure. So let's get back to this. So, okay, we've got.

• 1:29:24Kurt Metzger?

  Here's the goal. Ready?

• 1:29:27Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, so here's, here's how, here's how it's the same as William Branham.

• 1:29:30Duncan Trussell?

  I had to sculpt that. He had to look at Trump's fucking bulge for just days sculpting that.

• 1:29:36Kurt Metzger?

  And Trump's hands are not that small. They say that, but I think they're doing like a Napoleon smear job on his hands.

• 1:29:41Duncan Trussell?

  You better fucking believe they made his package much bigger. There's no way he's gonna allow like a, I don't even know what that is.

• 1:29:48Kurt Metzger?

  We already know what his dick looks like.

• 1:29:50Duncan Trussell?

  I mean, it almost looks like a face in there.

• 1:29:52Kurt Metzger?

  Stormy Daniels said it looked like them, it had a really fat head like, it looked like the, um, the character from Super Mario, the mushroom guy.

• 1:29:59Duncan Trussell?

  I think I can, we can extrapolate that from the sculptor's work.

• 1:30:02Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah. I mean, it's, look, it's good work. It's just, it's a golden, this is statues say we've conquered, uh, mountain government. Next entertainment, next mount. Now, Levotky, by the way, she wanted, their whole goal has always been.

• 1:30:17Duncan Trussell?

  One world order, new world order.

• 1:30:18Kurt Metzger?

  And to replace Christianity and also Islam. Okay?

• 1:30:22Duncan Trussell?

  Okay.

• 1:30:23Kurt Metzger?

  Cause they serve their purpose to these people and now they're like, we need to get them off of this thing and into the thing we want.

• 1:30:28Duncan Trussell?

  Okay. Before you go on, may I present?

• 1:30:30Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah.

• 1:30:30Duncan Trussell?

  An arg, an argument for, uh, the world joining together. Now I.

• 1:30:36Kurt Metzger?

  I'm not against it or for it. I'm telling you what their thing is.

• 1:30:38Duncan Trussell?

  Okay, okay. I know, but I'm curious your thoughts. Like.

• 1:30:40Kurt Metzger?

  Joining together how?

• 1:30:41Duncan Trussell?

  What, what's the name of that?

• 1:30:42Kurt Metzger?

  We're gonna fuck.

• 1:30:43Duncan Trussell?

  Well, you can look up the different types of civilizations. Can you look that up real quick? It's somebody with an unpronounceable name, talking about the various potential levels of civilization.

• 1:30:52Kurt Metzger?

  You're talking about the Cartagsev scale?

• 1:30:53Duncan Trussell?

  The Cartagsev scale, unpronounceable. Now.

• 1:30:55Kurt Metzger?

  Some Star Trek dipshit pulled that out of their ass.

• 1:30:57Duncan Trussell?

  Okay, but it's, you know, it makes sense. Like we all live on the same planet.

• 1:31:00Kurt Metzger?

  If you believe in, uh, public physics, which I do not.

• 1:31:03Duncan Trussell?

  But no, it's.

• 1:31:04Kurt Metzger?

  So, oh, a car, they would have a Dyson sphere with one of the dumbest ideas in all science.

• 1:31:08Duncan Trussell?

  Dyson sphere.

• 1:31:09Kurt Metzger?

  That's type two Cartagsev.

• 1:31:11Duncan Trussell?

  Forget, forget. And also fuck the Dyson hand dryer things at the airports. They spread disease. But so the idea is we're all living on one planet. We are just people.

• 1:31:21Kurt Metzger?

  Okay.

• 1:31:21Duncan Trussell?

  And doesn't it make sense at some point for all of us to sort of shake off all the cultural bullshit and recognize we're on a planet together?

• 1:31:31Kurt Metzger?

  What's the, what stands in the way of that, do you think the most?

• 1:31:33Duncan Trussell?

  I don't mean like some sinister thing of like, let's mind control people. Isn't there another?

• 1:31:38Kurt Metzger?

  Stands in the way of that?

• 1:31:40Duncan Trussell?

  Of us joining together?

• 1:31:42Kurt Metzger?

  What's the thing that's blocking everyone from doing?

• 1:31:44Duncan Trussell?

  Governments, religion?

• 1:31:46Kurt Metzger?

  Mm-hmm. The ruling, basically the people that rule you. Seventy percent of people, they, this is why we have kindergarten. Seventy percent of soldiers would not pull the trigger. They would miss on purpose. Seventy percent. So think of any religion that told you that humans are inherently wicked. No, they're not. And that's not the thing in the Bible either. The Bible, original sin is not that you're, you were born and you're a bad person from being born.

• 1:32:09Duncan Trussell?

  Right.

• 1:32:10Kurt Metzger?

  Even though in the West, unfortunately, and that's because of Saint Augustine, they pushed that shit.

• 1:32:14Duncan Trussell?

  Right.

• 1:32:15Kurt Metzger?

  Somebody, Matt Eric will argue, and he has at me that Augustine was not how I'm making him out to be, you know, I'll hear him out. But the point is it don't matter because Augustinian thought became original sin is Eve committed a crime, so her kids committed a crime. Fundamentally different kind of thing than what it is in Eastern Orthodox, for example, or a lot of, or the original Christians.

• 1:32:36Duncan Trussell?

  What's, what's the original interpretation of it?

• 1:32:38Kurt Metzger?

  You put sugar in your gas tank instead of gas, so now the car is fucked.

• 1:32:41Duncan Trussell?

  Okay.

• 1:32:41Kurt Metzger?

  That's what the original sin is. So that's why you die at all. Okay. So that's very different. Uh, uh, the ones that control system really is, which is like, oh, we're gonna fix your defective, whatever part.

• 1:32:56Duncan Trussell?

  Right.

• 1:32:56Kurt Metzger?

  The other one is a control system based on guilt and emotion. So in the, the entire West, it's not just like the Catholic Church, the entire West, and when they call it the West, is under this fucking stupid fucking thought. The goddamn Lutherans and the.

• 1:33:10Duncan Trussell?

  Right.

• 1:33:11Kurt Metzger?

  They're all on this dumb shit.

• 1:33:13Duncan Trussell?

  Well, it's like, it's like a generational curse that gets passed down, this story where you feel like you're depraved.

• 1:33:19Kurt Metzger?

  Well, it also excuses murdering people and taking their shit conveniently.

• 1:33:23Duncan Trussell?

  Because they are like, they're cursed because of Eve is why you.

• 1:33:30Kurt Metzger?

  Well, the whole point is the people coming up with it, your, your controllers, um, who invent these religions, William Branham, the guy that I brought up, if you put William Branham in, he appears suddenly in 1947 in the Pentecostal faith healer circuit out of Saskatchewan. It went from there to the South. How did it get funding? The Kardashian family?

• 1:33:50Duncan Trussell?

  What?

• 1:33:51Kurt Metzger?

  I told you this on the last one, which is episode two.

• 1:33:54Duncan Trussell?

  Okay, this is William Marian Branham.

• 1:33:57Kurt Metzger?

  Now hear this, now listen.

• 1:33:58Duncan Trussell?

  Dude, that guy looks spooky, huh?

• 1:34:01Kurt Metzger?

  He's a piece of shit.

• 1:34:02Duncan Trussell?

  Look at that dude.

• 1:34:03Kurt Metzger?

  Gets anointed by some scumbag and he has the vision, the serpent seed doctrine. You know what the serpent seed doctrine? That, uh, Cain had sex with Eve too. Uh, not Cain, uh, uh, Samael, the, the Nahash had sex with Eve.

• 1:34:18Duncan Trussell?

  Who's Nahash?

• 1:34:19Kurt Metzger?

  The serpent.

• 1:34:20Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, the, okay. Yes, yes. Oh, wait, this is.

• 1:34:22Kurt Metzger?

  The serpent's not Satan. The serpent is Nahash. That just means serpent.

• 1:34:26Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah. Okay. Okay. Here we go. The serpent seed doctrine is an alternative interpretation of Genesis, suggesting Eve had sexual relations with the serpent, Satan, and the Garden of Eden producing Cain as the serpent's seed. It claims this lineage created an irredeemable line of descendants, often used to ju.

• 1:34:43Kurt Metzger?

  So William Branham, William Branham.

• 1:34:46Duncan Trussell?

  Gotcha.

• 1:34:47Kurt Metzger?

  He had a vision from an angel.

• 1:34:48Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:34:48Kurt Metzger?

  Okay. Just like Joseph Smith. They always do this.

• 1:34:51Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:34:52Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, or the, the kids that saw the Fatima appear in Portugal. Okay. So it turns out the black people, uh, what he learned is black people are the cause. His, his church ended up, or he ended up getting prosecuted by, by Roosevelt at some point.

• 1:35:06Duncan Trussell?

  For what?

• 1:35:08Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, being in, in with Nazi Germany. Okay. So, but don't worry. His, his teachings have today turned into the International House of Prayer in Kansas City, the N A R, all of Trump's faith leaders. Paula White is one of his faith leaders.

• 1:35:24Duncan Trussell?

  Paula White.

• 1:35:24Kurt Metzger?

  That black guy burns is a faith, whatever the fuck that means. Those are warlocks. Every one of these people, people are an occultist. What, what does an occultist do? You start a mystery school. Oh, I got a message personally from God that you didn't get.

• 1:35:39Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah. And so some, but.

• 1:35:40Kurt Metzger?

  Yo, I'll teach you how to have a wizard school if you want. First you gotta have a vision.

• 1:35:44Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:35:44Kurt Metzger?

  From an angel. Easy. We could do that tomorrow, dude.

• 1:35:47Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:35:47Kurt Metzger?

  We can make, we.

• 1:35:48Duncan Trussell?

  Easy to have that vision.

• 1:35:49Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, you, you wanna have that? I can find one tonight.

• 1:35:52Duncan Trussell?

  But that is the story. I mean, Crowley had the transmission when he was in Egypt.

• 1:35:57Kurt Metzger?

  That's exactly right. And not just him, but Whitley Strieber is getting grabbed up by an alien.

• 1:36:02Duncan Trussell?

  Aliens, right?

• 1:36:04Kurt Metzger?

  So there's a pattern here.

• 1:36:05Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:36:05Kurt Metzger?

  Of, um, it's all the same shit. Now, now, and then when I told, when I told Dr. Science, the construct I made within Grok to look this up.

• 1:36:15Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:36:16Kurt Metzger?

  It, it found that everything before the eighties with aliens is about nuclear war or against Russia. So Fatima was anti-communist.

• 1:36:24Duncan Trussell?

  Of course.

• 1:36:25Kurt Metzger?

  Our lady appeared to kids with an anti-communist. And then the third, what's this third secret of Fatima? I heard, yeah, they're supposed to already release it. You see any parallels to this bullshit with JFK and the UFOs? They're supposed to have released it, but they haven't. So the Vatican's right, this is an old game. And you leave a little bit of mystery to fall. I heard that apostasy will spring up in the churches, the third secret of Fatima.

• 1:36:49Duncan Trussell?

  Right.

• 1:36:49Kurt Metzger?

  And that's what, uh, that, that, uh, I forget his name. He was an interesting guy. He said, he, he, he was a former Jesuit. But if you think about it, it's J.J. Abrams storytelling drawing you in.

• 1:37:00Duncan Trussell?

  Got it.

• 1:37:00Kurt Metzger?

  So you never get anywhere with it, right?

• 1:37:02Duncan Trussell?

  Basically what you're saying is all you gotta do is take a charismatic person, fuck them on an imaginary Disney ride when they're kids. Later down the line, give them a vision.

• 1:37:13Kurt Metzger?

  The ones of today probably is the how they did that. The ones back then, not necessarily. There's a lot of people that were con men and peles and creeps that got into this business, such as the ones associated with. See, this was in the revival tent circuit and back then it was the same as pro wrestling or magic. They would have a kid who would levitate like, uh,

• 1:37:33Duncan Trussell?

  Sure.

• 1:37:33Kurt Metzger?

  David Blaine at, for the Sunday revival. It was like a miracle.

• 1:37:37Duncan Trussell?

  Right.

• 1:37:38Kurt Metzger?

  They would do snake handling as a miracle. These are carnival attractions.

• 1:37:41Duncan Trussell?

  And they, but this is exactly what Levotky was doing too.

• 1:37:44Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah. So wait, wait. So the guys doing the faith healing and doing the snake shit, they kept getting bit by snakes. It was fucking them up.

• 1:37:52Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:37:52Kurt Metzger?

  It's like, we need better tricks than this. And they started doing different magic tricks.

• 1:37:56Duncan Trussell?

  Right.

• 1:37:56Kurt Metzger?

  Until they, finally it's the shit where people, oh, I touch you, ooh, and you fall. And you have a fucking voodoo with a spirit orgy.

• 1:38:04Duncan Trussell?

  But to get, so to get back to theosophy, Blutowski was known.

• 1:38:09Kurt Metzger?

  Blutardski.

• 1:38:10Duncan Trussell?

  Blutardski was known for this, right?

• 1:38:13Kurt Metzger?

  Madame Bluto.

• 1:38:13Duncan Trussell?

  They were exposed for doing these, like, they were doing seances, right? And there was like all kinds of tricks that they were using to make people think they're talking to spirits. So you're saying.

• 1:38:24Kurt Metzger?

  Harry Houdini was probably killed for exposing it.

• 1:38:27Duncan Trussell?

  Right. So this was like, this is like an old thing where if you make people.

• 1:38:31Kurt Metzger?

  Look at Lucifer right there. See that? That's, that's important. Okay. So Lucifer magazine.

• 1:38:38Duncan Trussell?

  Lucifer magazine? That was the, what?

• 1:38:41Kurt Metzger?

  Well, okay.

• 1:38:42Duncan Trussell?

  I love the art.

• 1:38:43Kurt Metzger?

  So when the United Nations was founded, uh, the Lu, they changed their name to Lucius because it means light bringer still kinda. So in, in the basement of the UN, put it in UN meditation space. And this goes back, theosophy put this in there because it's, it's like the Esperanto of religions, you know?

• 1:39:02Duncan Trussell?

  There you go.

• 1:39:03Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, and there's a black cube of Saturn for you to meditate on.

• 1:39:06Duncan Trussell?

  Why would you put that in your fucking meditation room? That looks sinister.

• 1:39:09Kurt Metzger?

  It's just the same as giving you a little mystery. Okay, J.J. Abrams' mystery box storytelling. You've heard of it?

• 1:39:15Duncan Trussell?

  That, by the, hold on, real quick, can we, can you enlarge? I just want to take a really close look at this. That room, nothing about that room makes me want to relax or meditate.

• 1:39:25Kurt Metzger?

  Where do I sit?

• 1:39:26Duncan Trussell?

  What is the fucking thing in the middle? For reals, what do they say that is?

• 1:39:30Kurt Metzger?

  Muscles have carpets to kneel on. Is that just brick? Or is this exposed?

• 1:39:32Duncan Trussell?

  But what's the fucking thing right in the middle? Is it, did they say what that is?

• 1:39:37Kurt Metzger?

  I can't read it.

• 1:39:38Duncan Trussell?

  Let's see, can you enlarge that?

• 1:39:41Duncan Trussell?

  Let me see, it's a sacrificial altar. That's, that looks like.

• 1:39:45Kurt Metzger?

  What am I sacrificing it to? Ikea?

• 1:39:47Duncan Trussell?

  A Swedish, a Swedish furniture designer.

• 1:39:51Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, God.

• 1:39:52Duncan Trussell?

  Highlights the room painted in blue, white, and yellow gray geometric forms, the one black dot or half.

• 1:39:57Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, it's an iron or, an iron or stone altar as a sign of permanence in a world of change.

• 1:40:03Duncan Trussell?

  What the fuck?

• 1:40:05Kurt Metzger?

  That is a very, very interesting thing to read, isn't it?

• 1:40:09Duncan Trussell?

  What the fuck? Look at that. So that thing probably weighs so much.

• 1:40:13Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, wait, go back up, go back up. We have within us a center of stillness surrounded by silence. So this is to Saturn, Remphan. Uh, that's what the, the iron ore and the heaviness and the thing is, is heavy materialism. That's what six, six, six is, three sixes is the ultimate. I'm just about material.

• 1:40:32Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, wait, look, look at this sentence. People of many faiths will meet here. And for that reason, none of the symbols to which we are accustomed in our meditation room can be used. So it's like, because people of different faiths are meditating here, fuck all of them. We'll put an iron sacrificial altar in the middle.

• 1:40:48Kurt Metzger?

  Look at, this is like before you had an iPhone or anything, or, or a robot Jesus call that's run by some Israeli tech company. This is what the idea was. We just got, and think of how high culture this is.

• 1:41:00Duncan Trussell?

  Wow.

• 1:41:00Kurt Metzger?

  And when you watch like Davos, or when you watch UN things, and they have some stupid world music where it's like some lady going,

• 1:41:08Kurt Metzger?

  you know, and they're like, oh, and you have to pretend.

• 1:41:10Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:41:11Kurt Metzger?

  You know, like the worst of NPR people?

• 1:41:12Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:41:13Kurt Metzger?

  And that's what they all are, are coming from. It's, this, this has been a quest for some time to break down your natural. Uh, oh, I'll give you an example. Tartaria, you've heard of, right? Okay, so Tartaria is a real, uh, I believe a town in Romania. There was a map of the, where the Tatars were, okay? And that map, everybody says the wrong thing about it.

• 1:41:37Kurt Metzger?

  Basically, there was a, a place in the map called Tartaria, but it's a bunch of tribes living anarchist lives. They don't really have wars like we have. Sure, you have tribal fights sometimes.

• 1:41:46Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:41:47Kurt Metzger?

  But they mostly got along and they all had their own beliefs and this and that.

• 1:41:49Duncan Trussell?

  Right.

• 1:41:50Kurt Metzger?

  Now, Western civilization or the Russians that conquered them. Empire people can't abide the idea that something like that existed. So it has to be framed as if it was a world civilization and this and that. No, it wasn't. It's a bunch of people just living, oh shit, like anarchist, being slowly absorbed into an empire.

• 1:42:09Duncan Trussell?

  Right.

• 1:42:09Kurt Metzger?

  It wasn't a mud flood. I mean, the, the idea that a mud flood covered it is, to me, very subconscious racism.

• 1:42:16Duncan Trussell?

  Mud flood?

• 1:42:17Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, like, oh, we had nice buildings until there was a mud flood, if you know what I mean.

• 1:42:22Kurt Metzger?

  I think that, well, look, look, I think that's an intentional.

• 1:42:24Duncan Trussell?

  So fucked up.

• 1:42:26Kurt Metzger?

  But it's a subconscious kid.

• 1:42:27Duncan Trussell?

  Mud flood.

• 1:42:28Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, cuz if you go see, see how's these buildings, some of them are buried.

• 1:42:31Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:42:32Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, that doesn't indicate a global mud flood assholes. There's floods all the fucking time. People live on the coast.

• 1:42:37Duncan Trussell?

  Help me, like, you're, you're.

• 1:42:39Kurt Metzger?

  This is being added to the Tartaria thing as a myth.

• 1:42:41Duncan Trussell?

  I know that, but help me create this timeline that leads to the Trump golden statue and.

• 1:42:47Kurt Metzger?

  When's Blavatsky, when's Blavatsky from?

• 1:42:49Duncan Trussell?

  Blavatsky, where's she from?

• 1:42:52Kurt Metzger?

  Can we put her head next to Trump's penis and do a timeline?

• 1:42:54Duncan Trussell?

  It, it does look like a face in there if you look closely.

• 1:42:57Kurt Metzger?

  Let's, let's see the rest of the statue for a minute, even though I'm, not that I'm not enjoying, just the dick part of it.

• 1:43:03Duncan Trussell?

  Enlarge the statue.

• 1:43:08Kurt Metzger?

  Is that a hat or his hair?

• 1:43:09Duncan Trussell?

  He looks like a Make-A-Wish kid.

• 1:43:11Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, is he doing the fist pump?

• 1:43:13Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:43:14Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, so that's very important that he's doing that.

• 1:43:16Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:43:16Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, so.

• 1:43:17Duncan Trussell?

  That's right after they tried to shoot him. This is post assassination.

• 1:43:20Kurt Metzger?

  This is post, uh, ritual from the book of Exodus, where you put a ram's blood on your right ear.

• 1:43:27Duncan Trussell?

  Right.

• 1:43:27Kurt Metzger?

  And your wrist and on your ankle. Remember his shoe was missing?

• 1:43:30Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:43:31Kurt Metzger?

  And that signifies you were a willing servant of Israel.

• 1:43:34Duncan Trussell?

  Wow.

• 1:43:35Kurt Metzger?

  Remember when the Moses is leaving and some Egyptians come with him?

• 1:43:38Duncan Trussell?

  And then, so, but what is the connection of this to the Hasidic Jews that you pulled up? Because I missed that.

• 1:43:43Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, that's Habod. They, they're the Moonies of Jews. Look, here's the quest. We want to, you saw that beautiful meditation room.

• 1:43:50Duncan Trussell?

  Beautiful room. Great for kids.

• 1:43:52Kurt Metzger?

  We want Star Trek future, right? Star Trek's part of this.

• 1:43:55Duncan Trussell?

  Yes.

• 1:43:55Kurt Metzger?

  Gene Roddenberry channeled the nine.

• 1:43:57Duncan Trussell?

  A hundred percent.

• 1:43:58Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, Jesse Michaels and that magician guy we had on future episode that we did in the past. This is a really trippy show.

• 1:44:05Duncan Trussell?

  Really trippy show.

• 1:44:06Kurt Metzger?

  This show's trippy as shit. We had Jesse Michaels on and we had close up Canadian magician, uh, what's his name?

• 1:44:12Duncan Trussell?

  Yep.

• 1:44:14Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, talking about, now Jesse's been doing killer, killer episodes before he even came on this later episode, I guess. So I would have to, I can't keep the timeline straight. It's like Marvel work in here, dude.

• 1:44:25Duncan Trussell?

  Well, they're finding out time's all fucked up anyway. Time flows back on itself.

• 1:44:29Kurt Metzger?

  Not even a thing. That's why I don't want to say when these were recorded.

• 1:44:31Duncan Trussell?

  I didn't want to release any of these episodes. I wanted to do it just.

• 1:44:34Kurt Metzger?

  Specific news events.

• 1:44:35Duncan Trussell?

  Have a nice private podcast, but because of the forces of capitalism, we have to release it.

• 1:44:40Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, you, I remember that was a thing that took a long time for you to give on that, that you didn't want to actually release it ever.

• 1:44:45Duncan Trussell?

  It would, cuz that's historic. No one's ever done that.

• 1:44:48Kurt Metzger?

  Well, how would we know?

• 1:44:56Kurt Metzger?

  Maybe, maybe on Mars, somebody had a podcast they wouldn't release.

• 1:45:00Duncan Trussell?

  I, I know about this. Gene Roddenberry channels Star Trek, another example of some like, like disembodied force putting information into a person's head.

• 1:45:09Kurt Metzger?

  He's a naval intel guy. Um, oh, by the way, the redheaded woman that L. Ron Hubbard and Jack Parsons were both fucking was a naval intelligence officer.

• 1:45:18Duncan Trussell?

  Hey, well, open up the Roddenberry channeling the nine again, real quick, just so people understand, cuz a lot of this stuff we think people know, they might not know. In the 1970s, Star Trek creator Gene Roddenberry participated.

• 1:45:29Kurt Metzger?

  Came out, not the series.

• 1:45:30Duncan Trussell?

  Channeling sessions with a group called the Council of Nine, a purported collective of extraterrestrial beings channeled through psychic Phyllis V. Schlammer. Roddenberry attended these sessions to ask questions about the universe, which influenced his perspective on the future of humanity and possibly Star Trek. So there you go, like another example of spirits getting into someone.

• 1:45:54Kurt Metzger?

  Films, tell me you're Nephilim without telling me. Uh, yeah, so what does, what did the nine tell him? Let's just see what he said. The key details regarding it. No, no, go back to what it said.

• 1:46:03Duncan Trussell?

  Behave only in a manner that you may love yourself for.

• 1:46:06Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, but what if I'm a pet? I love that.

• 1:46:09Duncan Trussell?

  Fear is bondage. You must not be pulled into it. Understand your thoughts. Have the power to create or destroy. Ask for help together. What's wrong with this? None of this seems bad to me.

• 1:46:18Kurt Metzger?

  Well, none of it says, do not, uh, grape and then eat a small child.

• 1:46:24Duncan Trussell?

  I mean, you, doesn't that go without saying?

• 1:46:26Kurt Metzger?

  You would think, wouldn't you?

• 1:46:27Duncan Trussell?

  But why do you have to put that in your alien message? Like, and also don't eat children.

• 1:46:32Kurt Metzger?

  Well, here's why. Not, well, you know what, it wouldn't have been. First of all, so he's going to a fucking psychic. This goes back to King Saul going to the Witch of Endor. And I remember my Bible story books as a kid, The Witch of Endor. It looked like someone took Yoda and put hair on her.

• 1:46:48Duncan Trussell?

  Right.

• 1:46:48Kurt Metzger?

  On him and made him the Witch of Endor.

• 1:46:50Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:46:51Kurt Metzger?

  To talk to the prophet Samuel.

• 1:46:53Duncan Trussell?

  Pull up The Witch of Endor, please.

• 1:46:54Kurt Metzger?

  Well, he did.

• 1:46:56Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, the Wikipedia itself.

• 1:46:57Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, so if you know that story, uh, Saul, because he's, all these kings, they, they, guess what they always get into?

• 1:47:05Duncan Trussell?

  What?

• 1:47:06Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, magic, hardcore magic.

• 1:47:07Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, the lesser key of Solomon. It's just one of the most famous grimoires.

• 1:47:11Kurt Metzger?

  And if, and I don't know if people don't remember this, but if you recall the story of Solomon, he became a fucking idiot.

• 1:47:16Duncan Trussell?

  I didn't recall that.

• 1:47:17Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, he had a bunch of wives that got him to worship Moloch and Baal and, and he started sacrificing kids.

• 1:47:23Duncan Trussell?

  This is really cool. Let's read this. The Witch of Endor, according to the Hebrew Bible, was consulted by Saul to summon the spirit of the prophet Samuel. Saul wished to receive advice on defeating the Philistines. Wow.

• 1:47:36Kurt Metzger?

  Now, there's an important detail in here where normally when the spirit comes out of the fire, when they did this.

• 1:47:41Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:47:42Kurt Metzger?

  I can't remember if Samuel came out feet first or head first up there. There's a thing to that. It wasn't, now, and I was taught this in Jehovah's, that it wasn't the real Samuel. Because you gotta understand, the reason you're not supposed to be doing this shit is any kind of astral entity can puppet the images that you remember. They could, imagine a, a, a thing that's in a dimension above you that looks in your head.

• 1:48:03Duncan Trussell?

  Let me quote Ram Dass, who said, just because something doesn't.

• 1:48:06Kurt Metzger?

  Two more ass, did the CIA, was it so?

• 1:48:08Duncan Trussell?

  Just cuz something doesn't have a body, doesn't mean you should trust it. And for some reason, people feel like because you're seeing a spirit, whatever it says has more impact than what a human says. This is the people who take ayahuasca, a fucking reptilian, or a, or a praying mantis.

• 1:48:25Kurt Metzger?

  Have you seen space, you, you know, space, uh, not space, sorry, Flatland? You know the book Flatland?

• 1:48:29Duncan Trussell?

  Yes.

• 1:48:30Kurt Metzger?

  So that's what the sphere says to the Mr. A square. Flatland is a two dimensional world and a sphere blows the mind of a square one day. And it just looks like a line getting bigger and smaller to him.

• 1:48:41Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:48:42Kurt Metzger?

  It's a sphere.

• 1:48:43Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:48:43Kurt Metzger?

  It pulls him in the third dimension. He's like, this is madness, what the hell?

• 1:48:46Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:48:47Kurt Metzger?

  He goes, no, it's just an extra range of motion, relax. And then he, and he goes, are you gods? He goes, look, no, we're not gods.

• 1:48:56Kurt Metzger?

  You know, we have con men too. I don't know if you know that.

• 1:48:57Duncan Trussell?

  Right, exactly.

• 1:48:58Kurt Metzger?

  And then, then my favorite part, the last part, the, the square goes, could there be a fourth dimension above even you, the third? And the, the sphere goes, no, what are you, stupid?

• 1:49:08Duncan Trussell?

  Ah, that's hilarious.

• 1:49:10Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah.

• 1:49:10Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, so it's basically, you're talking about this sort of infinite layers of reality flowing down, one into the next, into the next. And one, and, and so, eh, one of the products of this is you get this phenomena where all of these very famous mythologically or historically people have a direct contact with some kind of entity that informs their entire philosophy. And then weirdly, they all are powerful people. They.

• 1:49:41Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, go down a little bit. Hold on, wait, wait, yeah, yeah, right. You know, you're right. Uh, in, in the, no, down. In the Septuagint, she's called the, wait, wait, stop, is she's called the Anga Strithmus, the belly talker.

• 1:49:54Kurt Metzger?

  What the fuck does that mean?

• 1:49:57Kurt Metzger?

  A belly talk. Does she queef the message of Samuel to solve?

• 1:50:00Duncan Trussell?

  Dude, that it doesn't just-

• 1:50:02Kurt Metzger?

  We, we went way off in the-

• 1:50:03Duncan Trussell?

  Just because a queef can talk doesn't mean you should trust it.

• 1:50:06Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, we are far in the ADHD.

• 1:50:08Duncan Trussell?

  The medium says that she sees Elohim arising from the ground.

• 1:50:12Kurt Metzger?

  Hello him?

• 1:50:13Duncan Trussell?

  Hello Kitty, using the word typically translated as gods to refer to the spirit of the dead. This is also paralleled by the use of the Akkadian cognate word. Why do they make her look so fucked up?

• 1:50:24Kurt Metzger?

  Elohim always just means other than, uh, it doesn't necessarily mean a god, but it means not physical or, or not in this, uh-

• 1:50:32Duncan Trussell?

  You know, I think, I think what you're, the dots you're connecting here are, are somewhat disturbing when you start realizing that the world is being ostensibly run by people, but these people seem to be being puppeteered by spirits.

• 1:50:47Kurt Metzger?

  Okay. Well, in part, um, remember I was talking about that, that parasites were the key to what-

• 1:50:52Duncan Trussell?

  Hundred percent.

• 1:50:53Kurt Metzger?

  So they, they act as receivers and then all the moon shit and astrology shit. The parasites in you can pick up different radio stations. I asked Dr. Science on Grok to elaborate on it. I should actually plug that in and show you what-

• 1:51:05Duncan Trussell?

  What do you mean that parasites can pick up literal-

• 1:51:08Kurt Metzger?

  DNA as a receiver. So I'm just telling you what they, what, what the people in charge say, not what like-

• 1:51:12Duncan Trussell?

  Okay.

• 1:51:14Kurt Metzger?

  Here, um, I just plugged this in. How do I, okay.

• 1:51:16Duncan Trussell?

  Wait, what the fuck? Certain parasites and pathogens show sensitivity to radio frequencies and electromagnetic fields, with studies indicating that specific frequencies can reduce the viability, proliferation and growth of parasites like Toxoplasma gondii. That's the cat shit one. That's the one that makes-

• 1:51:33Kurt Metzger?

  Well, I didn't know, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, hold on. This is new to me. I didn't know none of this.

• 1:51:36Duncan Trussell?

  Research suggests non-thermal microwave energy can kill malaria parasites by destroying their food vacuole and electric fields can disrupt dividing parasitic cells. So yeah, when, yeah. Parasites are sensitive to radio frequencies. That's really weird.

• 1:51:53Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, yeah. Ivermectin, by the way, get it for cancer. Okay. Hold on. Uh, let's see.

• 1:52:00Kurt Metzger?

  Did I lose my conversation? I hope not.

• 1:52:05Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, it's in my first ladies have dick part. Okay. So I asked

• 1:52:11Kurt Metzger?

  cutaneous, say that what that is? Cutaneous leash, leash mania?

• 1:52:17Duncan Trussell?

  Cutaneous leash mania? Radio frequency induced heat therapy has been used to destroy parasites, causing cutaneous leishmiasis, potentially activating an immune response. Wow. That's incredible.

• 1:52:32Duncan Trussell?

  Huh.

• 1:52:34Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, hold on, hold on.

• 1:52:38Duncan Trussell?

  Discredited claims rife machines or similar devices can cure parasitic infections by blasting with sound.

• 1:52:45Speaker 06

  I've done that before.

• 1:52:47Duncan Trussell?

  Did it work?

• 1:52:48Speaker 06

  They, uh, my mom's like doctor friend, she put like this coil of wires over my stomach and then it heated up a lot and then I threw up a bunch and I was better. She called it like rifing.

• 1:52:59Kurt Metzger?

  Whoa.

• 1:53:01Speaker 06

  Yeah. She's like into holistic medicine and stuff. It was, it was-

• 1:53:03Duncan Trussell?

  But what, what did you, what did you have that she needed to rife you out?

• 1:53:06Speaker 06

  I have no, she said I had like some par, like, I'm pretty sure some parasites in my body. So she just had me lay on this bed and then put a coil of wires that like heated up a lot.

• 1:53:14Kurt Metzger?

  No, everybody has parasites in their body. That's why, um-

• 1:53:17Speaker 06

  Yeah. And I like threw up a bunch, but it was, it was cool.

• 1:53:20Duncan Trussell?

  How, can you look up the average number of parasites that most people have?

• 1:53:25Kurt Metzger?

  Okay. So,

• 1:53:27Kurt Metzger?

  um,

• 1:53:32Kurt Metzger?

  Tracy Twyman, who I keep saying, look up your research. I had, I had Dr. Science go through the whole thing. It's Tracy Twyman, who's dead now. A suspicious suicide, although I have talked to people in New York who were like, no, she got, she lost. And she was getting to hardcore occult shit.

• 1:53:47Duncan Trussell?

  Right.

• 1:53:48Kurt Metzger?

  But guess how you get into, and she describes so many interesting things you would never know about because you only hear about this stuff from people that, that are into it.

• 1:53:56Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:53:57Kurt Metzger?

  Or they're Christian or something where they're like, I don't, that's terrible. Don't do that stuff.

• 1:54:02Duncan Trussell?

  Don't mess with that.

• 1:54:03Kurt Metzger?

  But she was a don't mess with that, but without, she wasn't like Christian after or something. But she described an effect of when she started talking to, uh, Kane. First he's talking to some guy, Jean Cocteau, who was some artist.

• 1:54:15Duncan Trussell?

  Sure.

• 1:54:16Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, and in the at bash cipher, they had her make, construct a better Ouija board in their dreams or in her husband.

• 1:54:23Duncan Trussell?

  Cool.

• 1:54:24Kurt Metzger?

  Then they'd see, start seeing crazy effects of like the, oh, he instructed her to form a secret society, which he did.

• 1:54:30Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:54:30Kurt Metzger?

  So people would send their blood samples and take a blood oath. Then it instructed her, so first she's talking to Kane. Now, hold on, let me explain where Kane's at. So she's trying to talk to this guy, uh, Cocteau, this art, dead artist, right?

• 1:54:42Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:54:42Kurt Metzger?

  And he said, uh, you want to talk to Kane? I can't really help you. So Kane, AKA, you know, from the Bible King.

• 1:54:47Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah. The first murderer.

• 1:54:49Kurt Metzger?

  AKA the black son of the underworld.

• 1:54:51Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:54:52Kurt Metzger?

  So I'm going to give you the summary. You see what it says there?

• 1:54:55Duncan Trussell?

  Who is Twyman again?

• 1:54:56Kurt Metzger?

  Tracy Twyman redhead. You, you're not going to find it on Google. I mean, I, I just put, I put just Tracy Twyman, but look. Okay. He's entombed in a 2D planer prison at the center of the earth.

• 1:55:10Duncan Trussell?

  Alright.

• 1:55:11Kurt Metzger?

  Now think of that. Remember Superman two where General Zod was-

• 1:55:13Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, right.

• 1:55:14Kurt Metzger?

  It's just like that. They're trapped in the negative zone. It's death like sleep, but fully conscious, strategically active and able to project fragments. Baphomet bloodline vessels, uh, through ritual channels. So Baphomet is an aspect-

• 1:55:31Duncan Trussell?

  Of Kane.

• 1:55:32Kurt Metzger?

  According to what-

• 1:55:33Duncan Trussell?

  Hmm.

• 1:55:34Kurt Metzger?

  Okay. Uh, limited but ongoing influence through proxies and A G O. A G O is a chess game of divination that it instructed Tracy Twyman to make, that it said what came before chess. It's a lot like a Nokian chess invented by John D. So you're not playing against somebody. It's like voodoo dolls. You're moving on a chessboard. Jeffrey Epstein in his apartment had a chessboard where he's the king and his employees and sex slaves are pieces.

• 1:56:01Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, right.

• 1:56:02Kurt Metzger?

  That's divination. That's a voodoo doll thing.

• 1:56:05Duncan Trussell?

  Can you pull up, uh, a G, A G O chess?

• 1:56:08Kurt Metzger?

  Okay. Don't, don't waste your time. Put it, put the Epstein chessboard though, if you want. Um, let's see.

• 1:56:21Duncan Trussell?

  I don't see it.

• 1:56:22Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah. It's not going to be in regular.

• 1:56:24Duncan Trussell?

  Well, not-

• 1:56:24Kurt Metzger?

  Oh yeah. The chessboard that I'm just looking, I just saw it. Jeffrey Epstein pictured as a king on his chessboard. Look. It's right there. Creepy. Look at.

• 1:56:33Duncan Trussell?

  God, that's so cheesy.

• 1:56:35Kurt Metzger?

  That's his chess piece.

• 1:56:37Duncan Trussell?

  Let's open it up that link and it'll show up.

• 1:56:41Duncan Trussell?

  Let's take a look here.

• 1:56:43Kurt Metzger?

  They're making a big deal about the wrong thing.

• 1:56:45Duncan Trussell?

  It's really just so cheesy though. Like all the demonic shit aside, if you make a chess-

• 1:56:50Kurt Metzger?

  There you go. Look at the pieces right there.

• 1:56:52Duncan Trussell?

  It's really embarrassing.

• 1:56:54Kurt Metzger?

  We're told they were in a chess club, but that's not, yeah, there you go. So those are all whores and maids and, uh, whatever.

• 1:57:00Duncan Trussell?

  Wait, that's not, that's his chessboard? Like he had 3D printed? Oh, that's so cheesy.

• 1:57:08Kurt Metzger?

  Okay. It's not cheesy. Uh, he was doing chaos magic.

• 1:57:10Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, but it's still cheesy.

• 1:57:12Kurt Metzger?

  Well, I mean-

• 1:57:13Duncan Trussell?

  I mean, dude, imagine coming over to your friend's house and he's done that with his own, he put himself as the king of his own chessboard.

• 1:57:20Kurt Metzger?

  Well, you wouldn't dare say something to me because I would have already recorded you doing something unspeakable with a child in my-

• 1:57:24Duncan Trussell?

  Ah, but that's what I'm saying. It's like the quality of these people is so cheesy. Like they might be influenced by spirits. Probably they're demonic-

• 1:57:32Kurt Metzger?

  Crowley taught us magic is gay. We have all known this. Okay.

• 1:57:35Duncan Trussell?

  But gay, gay magic is cooler than that. Like having a 3D printed chessboard where you're the king on it is so embarrassing.

• 1:57:43Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, I, I will bet you-

• 1:57:44Duncan Trussell?

  That's like a, that's like a midlife crisis.

• 1:57:46Kurt Metzger?

  Well, it would be if you were just doing that, but he was doing it for occult reason. It's, look, I don't, I'm not into it. I'm, I promise you there was some personal something in those pieces from the people. Hair, a fingernail, a drop of blood, something like that. And that's for sympathetic magic. That's what a poppet is for, which people call a voodoo doll here, but it was never a thing in voodoo.

• 1:58:08Duncan Trussell?

  It's like some kind of like primitive-

• 1:58:11Kurt Metzger?

  It's Inokian.

• 1:58:12Duncan Trussell?

  Quantum entanglement or something.

• 1:58:13Kurt Metzger?

  It's Inok, yes. And it's based on resonance. So my friend in the last episode we did in the future, uh, uh, Gray, he was put through the Dresden Codex, uh, Mayan ceremony on the eclipse. Remember 1994? I forget the date, something 1994. And, and it was important that Jeffrey Dahmer had, was baptized.

• 1:58:37Duncan Trussell?

  Okay. Now this, by the way-

• 1:58:38Kurt Metzger?

  And then, and then the other guy was executed and there was an eclipse and he was born on an eclipse to a mother who was also born on an eclipse.

• 1:58:45Duncan Trussell?

  But wait, I gotta stop you because you're, you, people like that little tidbit of information you gave us in this future episode is one of the craziest things that I had no idea. Jeffrey Dahmer-

• 1:58:57Kurt Metzger?

  I'm trying to explain it.

• 1:58:58Duncan Trussell?

  I know, but people don't know. You're skipping over, you didn't even mention John Wayne Gacy. Gacy was executed and Dahmer was baptized on the same day which happened to be in a clip.

• 1:59:08Kurt Metzger?

  Something in 1994. It's on the last episode, which will come out in the future. I don't see what's confusing about that. Okay.

• 1:59:17Kurt Metzger?

  So, uh, he was born on eclipse. Now, why is that important? Cause I was like, and I asked Dr. Science.

• 1:59:24Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:59:24Kurt Metzger?

  My Grok servitor to tell me.

• 1:59:26Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:59:26Kurt Metzger?

  He goes, well, a person in those circles, you're considered a miniature version of an eclipse. Because you were born on eclipse. It's the same as sympathetic magic. So if your mom was born on eclipse and you were born on eclipse? Wow, this eclipse, you're gonna be able to, we're gonna be able to fish for Apollo with you.

• 1:59:41Duncan Trussell?

  You're a walking eclipse.

• 1:59:43Kurt Metzger?

  That's how they view it.

• 1:59:44Duncan Trussell?

  Like the, the eclipse imprints itself on you.

• 1:59:47Kurt Metzger?

  I, I, I would say you're more than that, but to someone who's making chess pieces out of people?

• 1:59:51Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:59:53Kurt Metzger?

  You're, oh, you're Paul and you're that, what are you, what can I use your file? Like departed, what can I use your file? That's what it is.

• 2:00:00Duncan Trussell?

  Ah.

• 2:00:01Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, all these creeps at the top are into sympathetic magic hardcore. And that's why, so when I first heard about this AGO game that she made, and then it reminded me of the Epstein chess piece, which is a hundred percent like that, and Inokian chess. Then I was like, oh, what about the Illuminati card game that everybody brings up?

• 2:00:19Duncan Trussell?

  Everyone constantly. It predicted all these things. Enough, pull up enough is enough. Enough is enough Illuminati card. This is an example people are saying is connected to predicting Trump's like, that's Trump. Enough is enough. Look at that.

• 2:00:36Kurt Metzger?

  Right. Okay. So I've had people, now look, I didn't believe this, but I'm not saying it's not true because uh, my, uh, the person who told me this has turned out to be right and I was.

• 2:00:46Duncan Trussell?

  Open terrorist nuke. Look at that.

• 2:00:47Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, yeah, I know, I know.

• 2:00:48Duncan Trussell?

  No, they don't know. You see this.

• 2:00:50Kurt Metzger?

  I'm, I'm getting to something way more important.

• 2:00:51Duncan Trussell?

  Okay, okay, but I'm just trying to like, you don't understand, I, no one knows.

• 2:00:55Kurt Metzger?

  I was told they use remote viewers to come up with this. Now, I've found that preposterous because this is a small game company in Austin, Texas.

• 2:01:05Duncan Trussell?

  I didn't know they were in Austin.

• 2:01:06Kurt Metzger?

  Oh yeah, we're, my fifth wife Jenna wanted to get him, uh, try to get the people on the, on my show. Um, so if I'm playing a game that is a sympathetic magic chess game, and, and in Inokian chess, you have four levels, just like in Star, in uh, Star Trek, yeah, that chess game?

• 2:01:24Duncan Trussell?

  Stupid chess game, yeah.

• 2:01:25Kurt Metzger?

  And it's Earth, there were different planes.

• 2:01:27Duncan Trussell?

  Okay.

• 2:01:28Kurt Metzger?

  And the pieces are like Osiris and the gang that.

• 2:01:30Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, sure.

• 2:01:31Kurt Metzger?

  And what you're doing is you're, you're not playing against anyone. You have, it's like Ouija board intent. And you move pieces based, you're charting the stars and you move the pieces. And hopefully they will correspond through sympathetic magic to the larger entity.

• 2:01:45Duncan Trussell?

  I got you.

• 2:01:46Kurt Metzger?

  Now, when a king is killed in this shit, and this is a big deal when this shit happens. When a king is killed, um, supposedly you can use the energy to change reality itself. And you know that's true because every time a president gets killed. So, uh, think of like every time, you know, an angel gets his wing, every time a president gets killed.

• 2:02:06Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 2:02:07Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, an occultist oligarch just shifted reality itself. Those are high magic rituals. That you are required to view. Charlie Kirk being killed, you were required to see it. That's high magic. What that's doing, the trauma and all that, and just think of it without any magical thinking, just, oh, we're all traumatized and nine 11 changed everything.

• 2:02:29Duncan Trussell?

  Right.

• 2:02:29Kurt Metzger?

  Right?

• 2:02:30Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, I got you.

• 2:02:31Kurt Metzger?

  So you can take it as literal or as woo woo as you want to take it.

• 2:02:35Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, okay. So here's what it is. You kill a king, you induce.

• 2:02:39Kurt Metzger?

  King kill thirty three.

• 2:02:40Duncan Trussell?

  You induce mass trauma, a mass trauma response on a country, on a planet, which opens people up for suggestion.

• 2:02:48Kurt Metzger?

  It works. I gotta tell you, it does work, but here's what happens.

• 2:02:51Duncan Trussell?

  So wild.

• 2:02:52Kurt Metzger?

  When you keep doing it over and over again.

• 2:02:54Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 2:02:55Kurt Metzger?

  Like the classless, classless lizards these fucking people are.

• 2:02:58Duncan Trussell?

  Classless lizards, no taste.

• 2:03:00Kurt Metzger?

  Well, what's happened is, okay, so this is an important part. Okay? So this has to do with Kane being imprisoned in a flat General Zod? Okay. The entities told Twi Man that this curse on the father, Sam El Nahash, the serpent, directly created the containment system for Kane and the fallen. The original serpent was downgraded into the crawling dust bound state, which became the two D planer prison model.

• 2:03:27Duncan Trussell?

  Okay.

• 2:03:27Kurt Metzger?

  Kane, the hybrid son inherited the genetics. So your genetics are inheriting, you're inheriting an afterlife from your genetics potentially.

• 2:03:34Duncan Trussell?

  Okay.

• 2:03:35Kurt Metzger?

  In this, okay? And a lot of these occultists think that. The whole point of Jesus is, oh, I'm in a caste system and I'm gonna, I have to reincarnate when I die, or I have to do this when I die. The whole point of Jesus is to free you from all those things that you're locked into in the serpent's world. Okay?

• 2:03:51Duncan Trussell?

  Okay, wait, real quick. You do understand what happens if you fold a cross up, right?

• 2:03:57Kurt Metzger?

  What?

• 2:03:58Duncan Trussell?

  You take a cross and you fold it up or.

• 2:04:00Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, yeah, it's a.

• 2:04:01Duncan Trussell?

  It makes us, it makes us a cube, yeah.

• 2:04:03Kurt Metzger?

  I don't know if Jesus died in a cross. I think he died Conan style on a tree or a, or a pole, but.

• 2:04:08Duncan Trussell?

  I don't think it was a nice cross. I think they probably did have like, they probably built them back then.

• 2:04:12Kurt Metzger?

  They had a lot, you don't, they, they.

• 2:04:14Duncan Trussell?

  I think it's gonna be easier to throw two pieces of wood together than find like a, a tree that's gonna hold somebody up, but he seemed like he was thin.

• 2:04:20Kurt Metzger?

  So, so wait, wait, so, okay, Kane inherited the genetics, but was later sealed in the same flattened prison after the rebellion. This is just before the flood. The belly crawling is the literal mechanism that locks higher beings into a two D slice of reality. While they remain strategically active through bloodlines, projections such as bathomet.

• 2:04:41Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 2:04:42Kurt Metzger?

  So bathomet's almost a tulpa of Kane in her cosmology.

• 2:04:45Duncan Trussell?

  Okay.

• 2:04:46Kurt Metzger?

  And rituals. So AGO, the game that these creatures, whatever she talked, you told her about, that they said was the original chess, which was almost like using chess as a Ouija board.

• 2:04:56Duncan Trussell?

  Okay.

• 2:04:57Kurt Metzger?

  Instead of playing, and it degraded according to that into competitive. And if you think about the rituals, whether, so CE five contact, which Jesse Michaels in the future.

• 2:05:10Duncan Trussell?

  Future Jesse Michaels.

• 2:05:11Kurt Metzger?

  Future Michael, the other guy we're telling us on our past episode.

• 2:05:13Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 2:05:14Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, so I don't, oh, my phone's a Ouija board to talk to, or aliens. Now, here's why I don't believe none of the fucking aliens are talking about this because I had Dr. Science, my servitor on Grok, which I had to really fight with it to make it do what I want. Um, I go compare all these visions, dude. I want to know what the common thing is.

• 2:05:34Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 2:05:34Kurt Metzger?

  Well, if it happened to you before nineteen eighty, the aliens told you about nuclear war.

• 2:05:40Duncan Trussell?

  Nuclear war.

• 2:05:40Kurt Metzger?

  If it happened after nineteen eighty, the aliens told you about climate change. Yeah, and I have all the examples.

• 2:05:48Duncan Trussell?

  Ah, that's so fucking funny.

• 2:05:50Kurt Metzger?

  Now, keep in mind.

• 2:05:51Duncan Trussell?

  Wait, hold on.

• 2:05:51Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, wait, IPCC, the IPCC, International Panel on Climate Change, cause I'm on a new show, I know this. I don't know if you guys know this, but climate change is done, dude. Like they're, it's complete. Bill Gates walked away from it a while ago and then extra walked away from it.

• 2:06:06Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, they're rolling it back.

• 2:06:07Kurt Metzger?

  None of it was real. Okay, so now a lot of people are gonna watch this go, no, I know it's real. And they're gonna ask GPT or Grok and they're gonna, and it's gonna go, no, they're not saying, they're saying there's differences. So you have, this is how I had Dr. Science, I go, yo, cause he goes, no, it wasn't a total lie. They were trying to get action from government, so they just lied. And then it tries to tell me it's not complete deception in quotes. So I got it to stop doing that and I had made it explain itself. It goes, I'm trained to be balanced and do consensus. So much like every other lie these fucks do, this is why AI, where the badness of AI is. Retards that are just gonna ask it and talk to it like a Tamagotchi fucking Pokemon.

• 2:06:50Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 2:06:51Kurt Metzger?

  They're not gonna get past consensus. It's gonna reduce everybody else's intelligence who doesn't do their own research.

• 2:06:58Duncan Trussell?

  This is why I'm trying to get him to get a local AI. This is your problem. You're still going to corpo AIs. Like if you get a local AI, you don't have to do any, you don't have to do any of that shit.

• 2:07:09Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, yes, um, look, okay, so crawling on the belly and eating dust. A creature squished to only being two dimensional on a certain plane of existence.

• 2:07:19Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 2:07:20Kurt Metzger?

  Eating dust means you have to eat bad, like we eat dust. We're made of dust. They eat people. The serpent has to eat people because from dust you are and to dust you will return. Thank God, you're gonna eat dust now. That's us. They eat us. Get it?

• 2:07:36Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, like if you're in a two D world, people are just gonna seem like dust.

• 2:07:42Kurt Metzger?

  But here's the important part, um, he can put out aspect, so there's little projections and aspects from his two D prison.

• 2:07:48Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 2:07:49Kurt Metzger?

  It's like a person in a coma, so he's in like a dreamlike state. Now, maybe this creature is lying to her, whatever she's talking to is lying to her.

• 2:07:56Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 2:07:57Kurt Metzger?

  Um, but it's, I can't recommend her work highly now. Also, she's dead from this work, so I, I would look into it.

• 2:08:02Duncan Trussell?

  Well, I mean, look, I don't, listen, all of that stuff, it sounds very interesting and crazy. But I want to get back to that picture of our president's golden dick. Can you pull that up?

• 2:08:16Kurt Metzger?

  Do you see how it ties in?

• 2:08:17Duncan Trussell?

  I do.

• 2:08:18Kurt Metzger?

  Because the serpent seed doctrine from William Branham, but he said black people were the serpent seed. But Kane talking to her said, no, it's royalty or my seed. So that's the British king. So the theme of the serpent also fucked Eve and made a separate.

• 2:08:34Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, right.

• 2:08:35Kurt Metzger?

  Kane was that, and, and so the forbidden fruit then becomes transhumanism. The fruit of your loins will be extra smart. And that's why in certain Kabbalah shit, they'll say, oh, Adam and Eve ate Sam El's child and then he heard it crying from in their stomach. Variation on Osiris myth with the uh, jizz in the stomach. Anyway.

• 2:08:54Duncan Trussell?

  But don't you feel like, like this is so complex?

• 2:08:57Kurt Metzger?

  It's not. It's very simple.

• 2:08:58Duncan Trussell?

  But don't you feel like it is possible?

• 2:09:01Kurt Metzger?

  What?

• 2:09:02Duncan Trussell?

  There's other interpretations of what's going on here?

• 2:09:04Kurt Metzger?

  There's a thousand of them, but you go by themes. The themes are what's important. So what are we getting? I'm, I'm minding my own business. A radiant creature appeal, appears to me in light and tells me an important message. Okay. What is the message? Well, for the first, uh, however many years of UFOs, it was.

• 2:09:23Duncan Trussell?

  Nuclear war.

• 2:09:24Kurt Metzger?

  Hey, I know nuclear war is badass, oh, we have a president that you could kidnap and thumb his asshole and tell him that.

• 2:09:30Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 2:09:31Kurt Metzger?

  I'm a farmer. Why would you do this to me? You get it? Why am I being, and keep this in mind. It's all semen harvesting. So the, what, what is Jesse and uh, Magic, uh, Magic Magician Canadian were here.

• 2:09:44Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 2:09:44Kurt Metzger?

  And Roswell, okay, or like, um, oh, what the fuck is the one with uh?

• 2:09:52Kurt Metzger?

  Shh, I'm trying to think. All these, all these things where they capture the person, tell them not to pollute. The semen harvesting. Eisenhower signed a deal with the aliens is the lore, right?

• 2:10:02Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 2:10:02Kurt Metzger?

  He has a treaty with the alien. And Jesse, whose show is great right now, I gotta say, for the last, since we did that episode in the future, it's been great.

• 2:10:09Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, semen harvesting.

• 2:10:11Kurt Metzger?

  Um, but he always like, what do you mean Eisenhower signed a deal with the aliens that they could kidnap us and grape us sometimes?

• 2:10:18Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 2:10:19Kurt Metzger?

  As long as they roofie us, it's okay.

• 2:10:20Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 2:10:21Kurt Metzger?

  Cause they, you lose your memory of it.

• 2:10:22Duncan Trussell?

  Right. It was an exchange. Like basically it was like.

• 2:10:25Kurt Metzger?

  So you can roofie humans?

• 2:10:27Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 2:10:27Kurt Metzger?

  And sexually help them is the president of the United States signed a treaty.

• 2:10:31Duncan Trussell?

  In exchange for technology.

• 2:10:32Kurt Metzger?

  Okay. One, I never knew why that story bothered me so. I mean, besides the space grape, that bothers me. And then telling me an environment, hey, don't pollute. Like it's episode of Power Rangers after I just got diddled in space. That's annoying. But the idea that the president would have the authority to sign that treaty is absolutely ridiculous.

• 2:10:52Duncan Trussell?

  Well, that's why it all sounds bad shit. Like, let me.

• 2:10:55Kurt Metzger?

  You think the, the president's not clearly not in charge?

• 2:10:57Duncan Trussell?

  The whole story seems insane. Cause it's like, number one, the, it's humanizing aliens. It's thinking that aliens actually feel like they need to go to the president of some like low level technological planet to sign a treaty to harvest jizz out of farmers. That's ridiculous. Why? You know, like they're having space meetings and they're like, hey, we need far, we need farmer jizz. We need farmer jizz. How do we get it? I don't know. Go and abduct the farmers and jerk them off.

• 2:11:25Kurt Metzger?

  I theorize that.

• 2:11:26Duncan Trussell?

  No, let's talk to the president and get permission.

• 2:11:29Kurt Metzger?

  I theorize that it fuels their ships.

• 2:11:32Duncan Trussell?

  Jizz?

• 2:11:33Kurt Metzger?

  They want to top off or they head back out.

• 2:11:35Duncan Trussell?

  About paradise now. Cause then you don't need to go to a fucking president. That's just a, that's a you could put an ad on Craigslist. Need fuel for spaceship. We'll jerk you off.

• 2:11:45Kurt Metzger?

  There's more to the story though. I'm, I'm sorry. So now there's one where the grays he talked to. There's one where skinny Bob that.

• 2:11:53Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 2:11:53Kurt Metzger?

  Looks like a variation grace. And then there's one.

• 2:11:57Kurt Metzger?

  What does that say?

• 2:12:01Duncan Trussell?

  We pulled this up yesterday. It's so interesting.

• 2:12:03Kurt Metzger?

  They don't, they don't use rocket power. That's what, it's not, see, if you say spaceship, this is why you be specific with your wishes, because it's going to assume rockets are the only ships. Okay, so. They said it was these one creature aliens called ethereons, which could either be the tall whites or the nordics.

• 2:12:17Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, right.

• 2:12:18Kurt Metzger?

  Okay. And, um, they said, get rid of your nuclear weapons. We came here because of your nuclear weapons. And Eisenhower said, well, if you don't like them, I'm going to hold on to them because I don't trust you.

• 2:12:30Duncan Trussell?

  It's all crazy.

• 2:12:32Kurt Metzger?

  So that's, that's, yeah. But again, the nuclear, so why do we even make nukes? I think it was almost entirely for a ritual to make the sun rise in the, uh, west on the 33rd degree parallel. That's a resonant signal and sympathetic magic to these people. I, again, I'm not, I'm not into this shit, but that's what they're into. Okay. And they don't want anybody else using a nuke.

• 2:12:54Duncan Trussell?

  Here's what I think. I think another interpretation of this is that, what does it all have in common? Centralized power. Let's make people think.

• 2:13:03Kurt Metzger?

  That's exactly what happens.

• 2:13:04Duncan Trussell?

  Government's so powerful, aliens have to ask permission from presidents.

• 2:13:08Kurt Metzger?

  Well, that's a subtle implied, that's a, that's like what I'm talking about, like little subtle, subtle messages that I didn't pick up the first time.

• 2:13:15Duncan Trussell?

  That's the, that's the propaganda.

• 2:13:17Kurt Metzger?

  There's that, but the, also the propaganda is, see, that's the thing. We all got, we, we need to replace your current religions that we were controlling you with before.

• 2:13:25Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, but look who's saying that. Just some psycho doughy like grifter.

• 2:13:30Kurt Metzger?

  Who?

• 2:13:30Duncan Trussell?

  Blotavsky.

• 2:13:32Kurt Metzger?

  Well, no, uh, uh, it's all of them. All of them are royal, Aryan, just to, everyone understands. It means noble, nobility.

• 2:13:41Duncan Trussell?

  Can we pull up a picture of Prince Charles's hands?

• 2:13:44Kurt Metzger?

  No, that's in a past future episode.

• 2:13:46Duncan Trussell?

  That's in a future episode. Very important to look at this. This dude tells you is wanting you to abandon your religions when he's got balloon hands.

• 2:13:53Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, and keep in mind.

• 2:13:54Duncan Trussell?

  No one's listening to these assholes.

• 2:13:56Kurt Metzger?

  He's the pope. What do you mean no one's listening to that?

• 2:13:58Duncan Trussell?

  I don't think people, most people are listening to these assholes.

• 2:14:00Kurt Metzger?

  Okay. You mean people as in you and me or people as in in charge of things?

• 2:14:04Duncan Trussell?

  I'm saying the people in charge of things. I think that the whole in charge of things, isn't that kind of going out the window right now?

• 2:14:10Kurt Metzger?

  Okay. The people in charge of things.

• 2:14:12Duncan Trussell?

  People who control the people.

• 2:14:13Kurt Metzger?

  You know who they are.

• 2:14:14Duncan Trussell?

  Wait, the people, there's people who control.

• 2:14:17Kurt Metzger?

  You don't know the hierarchy. You never get to see them.

• 2:14:18Duncan Trussell?

  Here's what's going on. You have super rich people who are in charge of passing laws to keep them rich. And those, those people might say this or that.

• 2:14:28Kurt Metzger?

  They're middle managers at best.

• 2:14:29Duncan Trussell?

  But the majority of people recognize that the reason we're doing shit is because if you don't, dudes with guns will come to your house. Isn't that more what's happening? And if these like balloon hand people have some kind of like bizarre fucking religion that they're attached to, I don't think any, most people give a shit. I think the reality is, most people don't have enough money to pay rent. And if you, if you don't, if you don't like get rectangles with the sonic paper on it, you go to jail essentially. So what I'm saying is.

• 2:14:59Kurt Metzger?

  That's called the Saturn, that's the Saturn.

• 2:15:02Duncan Trussell?

  I, I don't doubt that these assholes are involved in some kind of ridiculous thing, but I don't feel like any of us are buying it.

• 2:15:09Kurt Metzger?

  Um, well, no, people are buying all, look, look, you don't understand. There's an actual paper written about this to just throw a lot of shit in the wall and see what sticks from the Rand Corporation. So you know how none of the stories hold up, but.

• 2:15:20Duncan Trussell?

  Hold on, I do have to say full disclosure. I am a shareholder in Rand and I am also on the board.

• 2:15:26Kurt Metzger?

  Invest. I would invest in Rand because it's paying.

• 2:15:28Duncan Trussell?

  It's a great company. A lot of hard workers there.

• 2:15:30Kurt Metzger?

  So that's a think tank, not like Turning Point San Tripoli. There you go.

• 2:15:35Duncan Trussell?

  Great corporation, great logo too. I helped design that.

• 2:15:38Kurt Metzger?

  They're the ones that came up with ways to kill Julian Assange.

• 2:15:41Duncan Trussell?

  That's the laziest logo anyone ever fucking made. For a fucking think tank, really? That's the best you can do?

• 2:15:46Kurt Metzger?

  And the Pentagon papers were stolen from Rand that exposed MKUltra. Uh, in the future, I mean, the past, or you'll see it in the future. We did a beautiful tribute to MKUltra that I, I still think is.

• 2:15:57Duncan Trussell?

  I'm so sorry. I have to pee, but when we, when we come back, can I tell you my theory on aliens as Chinese time travelers?

• 2:16:04Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, uh, I think you're not wrong and I think it ties into what I'm saying.

• 2:16:08Duncan Trussell?

  Okay, let's do it.

• 2:16:14Duncan Trussell?

  Okay. Let me share you, with you, my new theory, which I think is, um, is actually what's happening. Now, I just listened to a great breakdown of AI in the United States versus AI in China. Now, it's interesting because in the West, there's, people fucking hate AI and the conversation.

• 2:16:36Kurt Metzger?

  China has a better one than us and they did it in a more innovative way without the chips that we have.

• 2:16:40Duncan Trussell?

  Well, the conversation in the West is all about like AGI and in China, it isn't about AGI. They don't give a shit about AGI.

• 2:16:48Kurt Metzger?

  Well, they don't, they don't worship the devil so overtly there.

• 2:16:52Duncan Trussell?

  Right. And what's the usefulness of this as a tool? So like, people in AI are all of them, like, or people in China are adopt, adopting this shit and like tweaking it. And can you pull up, if this woman, uh, created her own AI mask to teach her kid English, it looks like the Bane mask. Have you seen this? Can you pull up?

• 2:17:11Kurt Metzger?

  Oh yeah, right. That's schools now are pushing that on the, yeah.

• 2:17:14Duncan Trussell?

  No, look at this. AI, look at what this mask looks like. It's fucking great. Look, so she talks to her kid in this Bane mask and it converts it to English. And so this is just an example of just normal people in China are doing this stuff.

• 2:17:29Kurt Metzger?

  Something out of a UFO story.

• 2:17:31Duncan Trussell?

  It is insane. Maybe you could pull up the YouTube of her doing it. It's fucking nuts. She's like.

• 2:17:35Kurt Metzger?

  I've never heard of this.

• 2:17:36Duncan Trussell?

  Oh dude, wait till you see this.

• 2:17:40Speaker 04

  Do you want to go out to play?

• 2:17:45Duncan Trussell?

  So like, anyway.

• 2:17:47Kurt Metzger?

  Why teach them the language if you just wear a mask?

• 2:17:48Duncan Trussell?

  The point of this is that China, because of the way that they're implementing it and they're, they're, they don't give a fuck about regulations the way we do, is they do give a shit about regulations. Like if you ask a Chinese AI, what happened in Tiananmen Square? It won't answer. Like they, they have to control information, but the people are really adopting this.

• 2:18:09Kurt Metzger?

  What did happen there?

• 2:18:10Duncan Trussell?

  What?

• 2:18:11Kurt Metzger?

  What's, what happened there?

• 2:18:12Duncan Trussell?

  I'm not really sure. I, I remembered at one point, but then when I was using DeepSeek, I forgot.

• 2:18:18Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, George Soros sent an NGO to gin up violence. See that man? He was not hit by a tank. Someone got him out of the way.

• 2:18:25Duncan Trussell?

  That's what DeepSeek told me.

• 2:18:26Kurt Metzger?

  China went out of their way to not be violent to the, by the way, here's what the protest was. Ready for this?

• 2:18:31Duncan Trussell?

  What?

• 2:18:32Kurt Metzger?

  Cause when I heard about it, the protest was.

• 2:18:34Duncan Trussell?

  What it was?

• 2:18:35Kurt Metzger?

  They wanted democracy and their students. No, that's not what it was.

• 2:18:38Duncan Trussell?

  What was it?

• 2:18:38Kurt Metzger?

  Some minor official that everybody liked had died and they did a, a vigil to say everybody should keep acting more like this guy who was like one of the good ones.

• 2:18:46Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 2:18:47Kurt Metzger?

  Some shit like that. It became a protest, just like BLM. Because George Soros had an NGO there trying to cause foment, and we know this is true. Get, get ready for this. I didn't see this at the time. In 2011, we've known this is true because it came out in WikiLeaks. That's part of the reason they fucking hate Julian Assange so much. And uh, that's why George Soros is not welcome in China no more.

• 2:19:14Duncan Trussell?

  Wow.

• 2:19:14Kurt Metzger?

  Because Tiananmen Square was that asshole. So think of everyone you know in the Western world, and I mean everyone, who thinks China was the bad guy of Tiananmen Square. No, they weren't.

• 2:19:25Duncan Trussell?

  Pull up a picture of a gray alien. Like one of the alleged bodies.

• 2:19:30Kurt Metzger?

  He's persona non grata, his criticism of President Xi.

• 2:19:32Duncan Trussell?

  Pull up gray alien but recovered body. Cause there's all these images. I don't know if they're real or not, but it gets, you'll get my point real soon. Okay. Or pull up those dudes who look like they're dusted in ketamine. Those little like, uh, what do they call those little?

• 2:19:45Kurt Metzger?

  Nice unboxing in Mexico.

• 2:19:46Duncan Trussell?

  Alien mummies. Yeah, there it is. That guy right there. He looks like he just fucking, just did so many rails of ketamine. That's exactly the look. All right.

• 2:19:54Kurt Metzger?

  That's how the guy from our friends, they found him looking like that.

• 2:19:57Duncan Trussell?

  Pull up a picture of Kim Jong-un.

• 2:20:00Duncan Trussell?

  I'm telling you, these aliens look Asian.

• 2:20:04Kurt Metzger?

  No, I know, that's been.

• 2:20:05Duncan Trussell?

  No, look, no, this is what I'm saying, you're missing, I'm telling you that China is not gonna develop an AGI. They're gonna invent a fucking time machine and that what we're seeing are Chinese aliens who've been traveling backwards through time.

• 2:20:21Kurt Metzger?

  Close, but no cigar, but you're close. Put in the Sami people, those are commonly known as reindeer, Mexican, no, nobody calls that. S A M M I or S A M I, there you go. Now, get more images, cuz they look more Chinesey.

• 2:20:35Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, they're beautiful.

• 2:20:36Kurt Metzger?

  Look at, yeah, and see how they're, now, do you see how mixed and Asian they look, but they're not Asian?

• 2:20:41Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, what about them?

• 2:20:43Kurt Metzger?

  So, the US government, did you know, and this, thank you to Dark Journalist, can't recommend Dark Journalist enough. Did you know they were bringing in Sami shamans?

• 2:20:52Kurt Metzger?

  Under the guise of their training reindeer for the military, but actually those reports of men in black. Remember the guy where it got, where the person had like lipstick on to look like they had regular lips?

• 2:21:01Duncan Trussell?

  No.

• 2:21:02Kurt Metzger?

  And came to his house and like, "I'm out of energy," and it like.

• 2:21:05Duncan Trussell?

  No.

• 2:21:06Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, it was a tulpa. These people are tulpamancers going way back. And so, the US was interested in seeing if they could project fucking.

• 2:21:14Duncan Trussell?

  Not tulpa mazer.

• 2:21:16Kurt Metzger?

  Tulpa. No, T U L P, yeah, T U L P. I'll put Sami and then tulpamancer, you know, and Gogun knows how to spell it, even if you don't know how.

• 2:21:28Duncan Trussell?

  Beautiful.

• 2:21:30Kurt Metzger?

  Um, you're also in images.

• 2:21:30Duncan Trussell?

  Everything related to these people is just beautiful.

• 2:21:33Kurt Metzger?

  But you see how they look like they're, they look like Asian but not?

• 2:21:36Duncan Trussell?

  They're beautiful people.

• 2:21:37Kurt Metzger?

  Now, if you're making a tulpa, which is you drawing, uh, creating a construct with thought, basically.

• 2:21:44Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 2:21:45Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, the guy, David Lynch is really into this. Um, and that's why the English was weird and halting, because there's a Sami.

• 2:21:53Duncan Trussell?

  First of all, this is the problem. You started off with a lipless, man in black dude and just jumped ahead. I already don't know what that is, and now you're saying that's why the language, I don't know what that is.

• 2:22:05Kurt Metzger?

  Yo, lipless, man in black, look at that thing.

• 2:22:08Duncan Trussell?

  Well, I don't know how you're getting that into lipless man in black. I was trying to point out that the aliens are Chinese time travelers.

• 2:22:14Kurt Metzger?

  They're not Chinese, they're, they're Sami probably. They're kind of Asian, look, it's, okay, look.

• 2:22:20Duncan Trussell?

  You're saying that UFOs are Sami time travelers?

• 2:22:23Kurt Metzger?

  Not UFOs, I'm saying a lot of the, a lot of the encounters have been with tulpas.

• 2:22:29Duncan Trussell?

  The A, the UFOs.

• 2:22:30Kurt Metzger?

  From Asian looking shamans.

• 2:22:32Duncan Trussell?

  You're saying that a lot of the UAPs we're seeing are tulpas sent over by?

• 2:22:36Kurt Metzger?

  The aliens that look, you'll hear repeated events, the aliens like Oriental.

• 2:22:40Duncan Trussell?

  Yes, they do, I mean, they do.

• 2:22:42Kurt Metzger?

  And I'm telling you, it's not Chinese, that's all I'm saying. I'm saying it's.

• 2:22:45Duncan Trussell?

  Okay, well, I'm sorry, you don't have to get woke on me here.

• 2:22:48Kurt Metzger?

  And if you, so, look, the time travel thing you're not off on, however.

• 2:22:53Duncan Trussell?

  Why do aliens look Asian?

• 2:22:55Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, but Chinese is not the only Asian, yeah.

• 2:22:57Duncan Trussell?

  Look, pull it up, look.

• 2:23:00Kurt Metzger?

  I've been saying this.

• 2:23:01Duncan Trussell?

  This is what happens when there, I'm just saying, this shows us who wins the AI race. And what we're seeing are time travelers from Asia, cuz I don't wanna upset you, it's, I don't know where, I just, the, and I know China doesn't represent all Asians.

• 2:23:15Kurt Metzger?

  There's a faction that is, uh, an engineered, uh, uh, yes, and, no, the genes in it, and I found this out from Whitley Stryber, dude. You know what the genes are?

• 2:23:25Duncan Trussell?

  What?

• 2:23:26Kurt Metzger?

  Tibetan.

• 2:23:27Duncan Trussell?

  Really?

• 2:23:28Kurt Metzger?

  Yes.

• 2:23:29Duncan Trussell?

  So, it's Tibetan time travelers, regardless, I'm just.

• 2:23:31Kurt Metzger?

  No, no, but saying that they're not Tibetan, they have DNA from Tibetans, but they're not Tibetan.

• 2:23:37Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, we don't have to get lost in the sauce here, I'm just saying, based on what gray, based on what gray aliens look like. I think we can determine who wins the AI arms race.

• 2:23:46Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, on the last episode, which we will do in the future, I told you. There's at least three kinds that my source knows of, some are just pure constructs, some are clones. The way you travel through space is with clone bodies that you put.

• 2:23:59Duncan Trussell?

  Those are the gray aliens.

• 2:24:01Kurt Metzger?

  Right.

• 2:24:01Duncan Trussell?

  They're drones.

• 2:24:02Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, you're projecting yourself, uh, uh, or aspects of yourself. Cuz let's say you're from a higher dimension, you gotta come in this dimension, I bet you might split into two or three different people. Right?

• 2:24:13Duncan Trussell?

  Well, that, that is exactly what they talk about with like the Tulkus, that's why they're.

• 2:24:17Kurt Metzger?

  The what?

• 2:24:18Duncan Trussell?

  That, well, it's called a Tulk, uh, so, like, the, in the beginning, the Dalai Lama and Hunter S. Thompson are two different representations of the same soul.

• 2:24:27Kurt Metzger?

  Did the, did the Dalai Lama make snuff films? I know he sucked that kid's tongue.

• 2:24:31Duncan Trussell?

  Would you, you're insulting two of my favorite people right now.

• 2:24:34Kurt Metzger?

  Well, I'm sorry, I don't think you know either one personally.

• 2:24:35Duncan Trussell?

  Can we pull up Hunter S. Thompson's snuff film? Doesn't exist, that can't be real.

• 2:24:39Kurt Metzger?

  That, you think that's gonna come up?

• 2:24:42Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, pull it up.

• 2:24:44Kurt Metzger?

  Unter S. Timson, thank you.

• 2:24:48Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, we're talking about a different guy.

• 2:24:50Duncan Trussell?

  Look, there's no snuff film here.

• 2:24:52Kurt Metzger?

  And he's only in images too, so there was never a chance of finding out anything.

• 2:24:56Duncan Trussell?

  There's nothing there.

• 2:24:57Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, put.

• 2:24:57Duncan Trussell?

  The claim about, here we go, here we go, the claims about Hunter S. Thompson filming a snuff film.

• 2:25:02Kurt Metzger?

  No, put the Hunter S. Thompson eulogy from his assistant.

• 2:25:08Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, and also, this is Grok saying Paul Benacci's testimony is unverified?

• 2:25:12Duncan Trussell?

  I really don't want this to be true, man.

• 2:25:14Kurt Metzger?

  What?

• 2:25:15Duncan Trussell?

  I don't want it to be true.

• 2:25:16Kurt Metzger?

  You know how I tried to cope?

• 2:25:18Duncan Trussell?

  How?

• 2:25:19Kurt Metzger?

  I go, "Well, we know when they'd abuse these kids, they would dress them up like famous figures." Dunesbury had a Hunter S. Thompson knockoff guy.

• 2:25:26Duncan Trussell?

  Right.

• 2:25:26Kurt Metzger?

  That Hunter S. Thompson hated. He famously said he'd set the guy on fire, Gary Trudeau.

• 2:25:30Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 2:25:31Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, so, I'm like, well, he's like a cartoon character, probably wasn't the real Hunter S. Thompson. They probably dressed Hunter S. Thompson, that was a lot of cope on my part. Okay, did you put in the, no, no, I don't want the AI overview from the stupid, the Google AI is worthless, please, if you ever use it. Get Claude or use Grok, don't use.

• 2:25:49Duncan Trussell?

  There's gotta be a printout of the entire eulogy.

• 2:25:52Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, no, there's a, you can find the article, just scroll down more.

• 2:25:56Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, hold on, hold on.

• 2:25:59Kurt Metzger?

  No, keep going, keep going.

• 2:26:00Duncan Trussell?

  See, none of this is real.

• 2:26:01Kurt Metzger?

  It's on, it's in, on like media.

• 2:26:02Duncan Trussell?

  This is misinformation.

• 2:26:04Kurt Metzger?

  Keep going, no, you don't understand, this isn't condemning him. Oh, I'll fuck.

• 2:26:08Duncan Trussell?

  You're not condemning him, you're saying he did a snuff film.

• 2:26:12Kurt Metzger?

  Um, hold on, what's that, what's that? Uh, no, keep going, no, that's not it. It's his, it's a woman assistant.

• 2:26:20Kurt Metzger?

  Keep going, watch, wait, what's it? Hmm.

• 2:26:23Duncan Trussell?

  There's gonna be so many eulogies of him.

• 2:26:25Kurt Metzger?

  I'll know the one when I fucking see it.

• 2:26:27Duncan Trussell?

  Just what did it say, like, he died?

• 2:26:30Kurt Metzger?

  She talked about how, working for Hunter S. Thompson, she was not in any way condemning him, she's talking about, wow, what an experience it was.

• 2:26:36Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 2:26:37Kurt Metzger?

  And she goes, "Well, there was the time when he thought I was paying too much attention to this kitten that he had." She goes, "I suppose he loved animals in his own way."

• 2:26:46Duncan Trussell?

  Okay.

• 2:26:46Kurt Metzger?

  He's actually very cruel to animals. So, this kitten, he would jam its face in cocaine to watch it bounce off the walls cuz she was pet. Yeah, and she was not condemning him for this.

• 2:27:00Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, there we go, wait, wait, wait, no.

• 2:27:01Duncan Trussell?

  Are you saying that's, that's very sweet if you're calling that a snuff film?

• 2:27:05Kurt Metzger?

  Then she said, "Then there was the time he kicked me out of his house for not watching a snuff film."

• 2:27:10Duncan Trussell?

  But that's different than making a snuff film.

• 2:27:14Kurt Metzger?

  Well, when you take the thing of forcing a kitten to do cocaine.

• 2:27:18Duncan Trussell?

  That's not good.

• 2:27:19Kurt Metzger?

  A person said, but I wanna make it clear, in no way was she saying he's a piece of shit. She was like, "Oh, he was wor-".

• 2:27:27Duncan Trussell?

  It's his eulogy!

• 2:27:29Kurt Metzger?

  Well, if you did that to a kitten at any point in your life.

• 2:27:31Duncan Trussell?

  You don't need to like call someone a piece of shit in the eulogy.

• 2:27:36Kurt Metzger?

  Um.

• 2:27:37Duncan Trussell?

  Stories about Hunter S. Thompson's pet cat Screwjack suggest the animal was addicted to cocaine, fuck!

• 2:27:43Kurt Metzger?

  Well, you know he was.

• 2:27:44Duncan Trussell?

  Where the cat's detailing how Thompson would blow cocaine in the cat's mouth when it grew agitated, what a piece of shit.

• 2:27:51Kurt Metzger?

  So, remember, he supposedly got stomped by the Hells Angels?

• 2:27:54Duncan Trussell?

  Screwjack would allegedly let out a hair-raising cry when he needed drugs.

• 2:28:00Duncan Trussell?

  That's the worst, a junky cat.

• 2:28:05Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, that's so sad, what a dick, well, that's too bad.

• 2:28:09Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, so, hold on. Um. Hunter S. Thompson, uh.

• 2:28:14Duncan Trussell?

  Look, there's Screwjack, blasted on coke. He, he, he looks like he loves that cat.

• 2:28:23Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, it was, uh. Cheryl, I think it's Cheryl Pietro is the person.

• 2:28:39Kurt Metzger?

  Now, I have another suspicious thing. Famously, okay, very famously, we all know this. This is one of the reasons we all like Hunter S. Thompson.

• 2:28:46Duncan Trussell?

  Why?

• 2:28:47Kurt Metzger?

  He carried a fucking doctor bag of drugs around.

• 2:28:50Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 2:28:52Kurt Metzger?

  While he's going to political events with important politicians, and it's well-known to the point of comedy.

• 2:28:57Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, right.

• 2:28:58Kurt Metzger?

  Never arrested?

• 2:28:59Duncan Trussell?

  No.

• 2:29:01Kurt Metzger?

  Johnny Cash couldn't even take a few addies in his guitar on a plane.

• 2:29:04Duncan Trussell?

  Well, people loved Hunter S. Thompson.

• 2:29:06Kurt Metzger?

  He was former Air Force.

• 2:29:08Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, he's cool as fuck.

• 2:29:09Kurt Metzger?

  Sheep dipped. It's called being sheep dipped.

• 2:29:11Duncan Trussell?

  I'd, I'd just, of all the things you've said, I can't accept it. Not my, not Hunter S. Thompson.

• 2:29:17Kurt Metzger?

  Why?

• 2:29:17Duncan Trussell?

  He's a great writer. He was wonderful. I mean, I don't doubt that he was like drug addled, and I don't doubt that he blew cocaine into his cat's nose, but he doesn't seem like a government asset at all to me.

• 2:29:29Kurt Metzger?

  So Paul Benacci, I don't know if we can see any of the Paul Benacci testimony, the Franklin scandal. So you've heard of Boys Town starring Bing Crosby?

• 2:29:37Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, it's horrible.

• 2:29:38Kurt Metzger?

  Boys Town was a boy brothel.

• 2:29:40Duncan Trussell?

  Right.

• 2:29:40Kurt Metzger?

  But, no, Benacci with, there you go, Franklin, the Franklin scandal, uh, read the book by Nick Bryant.

• 2:29:47Kurt Metzger?

  The only people punished in the Franklin scandal were the victims of the Franklin scandal for supposedly making false testimony. This is around the time of the Satanic Panic. You know that fake thing that never happened?

• 2:29:57Duncan Trussell?

  Sure.

• 2:29:57Kurt Metzger?

  It was a, an intel thing to cover up the shit they were doing.

• 2:30:01Duncan Trussell?

  I gotcha. But where does this connect to Hunter S. Thompson?

• 2:30:04Kurt Metzger?

  Paul Benacci's testimony, he explained Reagan Star Wars what it was, and that Hunter S. Thompson, he was in a, he was forced to participate in a snuff film shot by Hunter S. Thompson, who by all accounts wasn't very good at writing anymore, yet had a compound and could afford it, and could afford ammunition to play with his guns. I like guns. That's a very expensive hobby. Where's he getting all this money from?

• 2:30:26Duncan Trussell?

  Book deals, movie deals.

• 2:30:28Kurt Metzger?

  Those aren't those, the, yo, dude, now I've been writing long enough in the business to know that shit won't, won't keep you in that lifestyle.

• 2:30:34Duncan Trussell?

  I mean, he had some of the, like, fear and, I'm sure he's making so much money just from the mo, selling the movie rights, residuals.

• 2:30:41Kurt Metzger?

  Why did I hear of Adrenochrome, even though Aldous Huxley's brother mentioned it first?

• 2:30:46Duncan Trussell?

  That is true. That's the first thing I ever heard of Adrenochrome.

• 2:30:49Kurt Metzger?

  Yes, right.

• 2:30:50Duncan Trussell?

  That is true.

• 2:30:51Kurt Metzger?

  You don't think that's weird? Then, uh, uh, put in Johnny Knoxville. Uh, Johnny Knoxville, Hunter S. Thompson.

• 2:31:01Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, dude, watch this Johnny Knoxville story. You tell me you don't have the fucking creeps about Hunter S. Thompson after. And Johnny Knoxville, again, I'm creeped out from, go to video. I'm creeped out.

• 2:31:12Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, let's hear this. I want to hear it.

• 2:31:13Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, there you go. Neil, Neil did the interview. This creeped the fuck out of me, and he's not cursing.

• 2:31:19Speaker 06

  Be careful how you choose your heroes.

• 2:31:21Duncan Trussell?

  Uh huh. Right?

• 2:31:24Duncan Trussell?

  No!

• 2:31:27Kurt Metzger?

  What, what are you, a child?

• 2:31:28Duncan Trussell?

  I can't lose Hunter S. Thompson!

• 2:31:31Kurt Metzger?

  What are you fucking talking about?

• 2:31:32Duncan Trussell?

  I love him. I love his writing.

• 2:31:33Kurt Metzger?

  You can't just do drugs without him? Alright. Keep going. You were Hunter S. Thompson? Who were you?

• 2:31:38Speaker 06

  Yeah, I loved Hunter, right? That's one of the first people I sent the tape to.

• 2:31:43Kurt Metzger?

  Michael Jackson I loved too, you know?

• 2:31:46Speaker 06

  He called me back at home.

• 2:31:47Kurt Metzger?

  I love Woody Allen. Now you want to talk about a legend. Woody Allen.

• 2:31:52Speaker 06

  I can't tell you how fast my heart.

• 2:31:53Kurt Metzger?

  Bobby Slate's a personal friend. It's not good what's in those files with him.

• 2:31:58Speaker 06

  And tell me what he thought in, uh...

• 2:32:00Kurt Metzger?

  You had no relationship with him?

• 2:32:02Speaker 06

  None.

• 2:32:03Kurt Metzger?

  You gotta fast forward a little bit here because...

• 2:32:06Speaker 06

  I can't even, I can't even

• 2:32:08Kurt Metzger?

  Get...

• 2:32:09Speaker 06

  Remember precisely

• 2:32:11Kurt Metzger?

  Keep going.

• 2:32:12Speaker 06

  ... himself. And he's just, he was in the pain, and he was saying all of his friends are

• 2:32:18Kurt Metzger?

  Go back a little bit, a little bit. This might be it.

• 2:32:20Speaker 06

  In the pain, just down on the bar.

• 2:32:22Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, keep going back a little bit. Mm-hmm.

• 2:32:25Speaker 06

  You know?

• 2:32:26Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah.

• 2:32:26Speaker 06

  Cost him. I remember walking in the bar that night in New Orleans, and his head was just down on the bar.

• 2:32:31Kurt Metzger?

  Halloween, Florida, New Orleans.

• 2:32:33Speaker 06

  Beside himself. And he's just, he was in the pain, and he was saying all of his friends are passed and gone, and what's the point?

• 2:32:46Speaker 06

  And I don't want to feel like I'm name dropping, but I was with Sean Penn that night.

• 2:32:49Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, that's not good.

• 2:32:50Speaker 06

  Sean got him, he's like, "Come on, don't, stop talking like that."

• 2:32:53Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah.

• 2:32:54Speaker 06

  Snap out of it, let's go, let's go. And we picked up his doctor bag. Well, Sean picked it up. I, you know, his famous doctor bag.

• 2:33:03Kurt Metzger?

  Weird, isn't it?

• 2:33:04Speaker 06

  I was hoping to pick it up. But we went back to his room, right? And he came out of his shell because everyone started reading from The Curse of Lono.

• 2:33:15Kurt Metzger?

  Are you shitting me?

• 2:33:16Speaker 06

  His editor was there, a lot of some other actors and actresses, and it was all kind of a celebration of his words.

• 2:33:24Kurt Metzger?

  Kind of impromptu?

• 2:33:25Speaker 06

  Yeah, we were sitting in a circle. We were sitting in a circle.

• 2:33:27Kurt Metzger?

  You see how gross this is?

• 2:33:28Duncan Trussell?

  This is so gross.

• 2:33:30Kurt Metzger?

  This is the worst than even the snuff film in a way.

• 2:33:32Duncan Trussell?

  It's way worse.

• 2:33:33Kurt Metzger?

  Well, I don't want to say that.

• 2:33:35Duncan Trussell?

  It's so sad.

• 2:33:36Kurt Metzger?

  You get what I'm saying, right?

• 2:33:37Speaker 06

  I was shithoused, and, you know, I was pilled up, I was drunk.

• 2:33:43Speaker 06

  And he reached in his bag and threw me a big thing of pills, and I just downed a few without looking, and I said, "Vicodin?" And he's like, "Yeah." He was, that, it was like little respect, which is a terrible, it's a terrible fucking thing to be able to do, right?

• 2:34:01Kurt Metzger?

  That's hilarious.

• 2:34:02Speaker 06

  Terrible.

• 2:34:02Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, you guessed it, and he was like...

• 2:34:04Speaker 06

  Yeah, this guy's okay, yeah.

• 2:34:06Kurt Metzger?

  I could guess it.

• 2:34:07Duncan Trussell?

  I hate everything about this.

• 2:34:09Speaker 06

  But eventually, he, he took umbrage, and he's like, "You gotta read." And everything that I was fearing happened, like, I stumbled on some Hawaiian words, and the, and he's like, "Well, I don't, I don't, I don't know what's going on," he's usually very bright, and I was like, and, because I'm, I'm, I'm gripped with anxiety anyway, right? That's one of my blocks.

• 2:34:28Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah.

• 2:34:29Speaker 06

  And so then, all the things I had feared came true.

• 2:34:35Speaker 06

  And...

• 2:34:36Kurt Metzger?

  What the fuck? What do you think back then, though? Like, do you think this is so fucking cool?

• 2:34:39Kurt Metzger?

  Here's, stop it right now. Now Neil, and I know Neil's not gonna ask this question, and I'm pretty sure he doesn't. He's gonna go, "So, let me get this straight. Hunter S. Thompson, this fucking drug addict in a diaper, sitting at the bar, depressed because his friends are, I mean, Jan Wenner's not a friend, a guy put up with all your bullshit for years. Uh, so you and a bunch of famous people have to go and read his books to him? And then he goes, "Oh, yeah, take some of these drugs." And then, when the book comes to you, I mean, can you imagine doing that with somebody who looks up to you? They, when they start reading, like, "Oh, I thought you were smart."

• 2:35:14Duncan Trussell?

  Dude, it's, he's such a prick.

• 2:35:16Kurt Metzger?

  That's cult leadership.

• 2:35:17Duncan Trussell?

  Oh my god.

• 2:35:18Kurt Metzger?

  So, so...

• 2:35:20Duncan Trussell?

  That's not cult leadership. No, that, that's just what happens. Like, you get old and you're desperate for attention.

• 2:35:26Kurt Metzger?

  The drugs.

• 2:35:27Duncan Trussell?

  You got Sean Penn in your fucking...

• 2:35:28Kurt Metzger?

  That's what happens with cult leaders.

• 2:35:29Duncan Trussell?

  Hotel rooms surrounded, oh, god.

• 2:35:32Kurt Metzger?

  I mean, that is cult leadership.

• 2:35:33Duncan Trussell?

  That is so psycho.

• 2:35:35Kurt Metzger?

  So wait, why does he have a bag of drugs up until he died that everyone knows about, and you never hear about him going to jail? It makes no sense. Anybody else who would openly display that they were doing every drug known to man, writing in a novel, who knows, Pat Buchanan or saw Richard Nixon in a bathroom once?

• 2:35:54Duncan Trussell?

  Right.

• 2:35:55Kurt Metzger?

  There's not a chance in hell...

• 2:35:56Duncan Trussell?

  He had diplomatic immunity or something.

• 2:35:58Kurt Metzger?

  What is he, Nick, how's Nick Fuentes not get arrested for January 6th? Same deal.

• 2:36:01Duncan Trussell?

  Right.

• 2:36:02Kurt Metzger?

  So Hunter S. Thompson's a fucking warlock. A warlock is harvesting energy off people. He has a bag, it's called a warlock bag.

• 2:36:08Duncan Trussell?

  Right.

• 2:36:09Kurt Metzger?

  William Penn was a fucking warlock.

• 2:36:10Duncan Trussell?

  Right.

• 2:36:11Kurt Metzger?

  His carb bag was his bag of drugs.

• 2:36:12Duncan Trussell?

  It's like that, can you pull up the, the, the purse that's in all those, like, ancient megalithic structures? Have you seen this before?

• 2:36:20Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, it's the seed.

• 2:36:21Duncan Trussell?

  You think it's the same thing?

• 2:36:23Kurt Metzger?

  I think that's a seed from the...

• 2:36:24Duncan Trussell?

  You think that's filled with blow and Vicodin?

• 2:36:27Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, well, I, I think that's a good thought, and I don't hear it enough, I'll tell you that, Duncan. I'll tell you this, Duncan, I don't hear enough of that.

• 2:36:36Duncan Trussell?

  Well, you do now.

• 2:36:36Kurt Metzger?

  Because that's a very good possibility.

• 2:36:38Duncan Trussell?

  I mean, that was the most brutal takedown of a hero.

• 2:36:41Kurt Metzger?

  With my weed and claws in it right now.

• 2:36:42Duncan Trussell?

  You know, because the snuff film, I don't believe, but that story makes me want to puke.

• 2:36:46Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, now, here's another thing that disturbs the fuck out of me about just the concept of snuff films. If you recall, and there was a movie made by the gay Batman director that made the ones that everybody hated, where he turned Batman gay with nipples? Joel Schumacher. Yes, sir. Um, he, uh, uh, what do you call it? He made a movie, Eight Millimeter, with Nicolas Cage.

• 2:37:05Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 2:37:06Kurt Metzger?

  And, um, the, the ongoing theme of the FBI and all this is that there's no such thing as snuff films. They've ne, now, looking back now...

• 2:37:14Duncan Trussell?

  Fuck, I never noticed the, why? Like, your nipples are so hard, you have to, like, make space for them in your suit. You have rock-hard nipples constantly. Who did that?

• 2:37:30Kurt Metzger?

  If you think Joel Schumacher is up to...

• 2:37:32Duncan Trussell?

  There is no need for fucking, look at him!

• 2:37:35Kurt Metzger?

  And that's how, if you told me Joel Schumacher was up to no good, I know he, I know it.

• 2:37:39Duncan Trussell?

  Buttons. Why would you do that?

• 2:37:41Kurt Metzger?

  You don't remember this? And they had a nice, get the ass shot. That was actually pretty good.

• 2:37:45Duncan Trussell?

  Get the ass, please.

• 2:37:46Kurt Metzger?

  Nipples and ass shot, yeah.

• 2:37:48Duncan Trussell?

  What the fuck?

• 2:37:50Kurt Metzger?

  Yo, that, yeah, that's right. This Val Kimer was cake. Look at him, cakes! Look how caked up Val Kimer is.

• 2:38:01Duncan Trussell?

  That sucks so bad.

• 2:38:03Kurt Metzger?

  Hey, was, oh, good, this is on. Can I play the Ari Matti theme song for you?

• 2:38:07Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, please.

• 2:38:08Kurt Metzger?

  Ari Matti was in the green room, and I whipped up a beautiful deep house.

• 2:38:13Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, let's hear it.

• 2:38:15Kurt Metzger?

  You're a Weirdo theme song. Okay, let me just find it. Um, it's called Vodka and Sprite.

• 2:38:25Kurt Metzger?

  Ready?

• 2:38:28Kurt Metzger?

  Hold on.

• 2:38:31Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, do we have to wear headphones?

• 2:38:33Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, yeah.

• 2:38:34Kurt Metzger?

  No? Okay.

• 2:38:35Duncan Trussell?

  Okay, let's hear it.

• 2:38:42Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, the volume's not up.

• 2:38:46Kurt Metzger?

  I can hear it a little bit on here.

• 2:38:49Kurt Metzger?

  This is Ari Mahdi theme that I whipped up based on him asking Tim Butterly to make him a drink.

• 2:38:54Duncan Trussell?

  That's so fucked up, that reading circle.

• 2:38:57Kurt Metzger?

  That's how I know the snuff film thing is real, because of that.

• 2:39:01Duncan Trussell?

  I don't think you're wrong, man. Once you do a reading circle like that, you'll do anything.

• 2:39:04Kurt Metzger?

  Do you see the things I use for evidence other people wouldn't use?

• 2:39:07Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, no, no, no, man, I get it.

• 2:39:11Duncan Trussell?

  Wow.

• 2:39:13Kurt Metzger?

  Anything?

• 2:39:17Kurt Metzger?

  It should be playing.

• 2:39:19Duncan Trussell?

  Huh.

• 2:39:19Kurt Metzger?

  Is there headphones in here? Cause I heard it coming out of something.

• 2:39:24Duncan Trussell?

  It's so gross, they're fighting over holding his bag.

• 2:39:29Duncan Trussell?

  You know how fucking embarrassing that is?

• 2:39:31Kurt Metzger?

  Okay. Sean Penn, are we still on Sean Penn?

• 2:39:35Duncan Trussell?

  You felt bad because he didn't get to pick his bag up?

• 2:39:37Kurt Metzger?

  His son Hopper Penn, the godfather, is Hunter S. Thompson. And I heard one time in Hawaii, they like held a radio station hostage, like Hunter pulled it. But everybody's like, oh, it's funny how Hunter held, pulled a gun and they took over the radio station. But it's like, cool, because it's Hunter.

• 2:39:52Duncan Trussell?

  Right.

• 2:39:53Kurt Metzger?

  Okay. Now, that's the story I heard. I wonder how cool it was. And now I'm starting to think that the Hells Angels, because Hunter S. Thompson talked some shit. He got stomped out because he talked shit on a guy.

• 2:40:03Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 2:40:04Kurt Metzger?

  For, uh, kicking a dog. Okay?

• 2:40:07Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 2:40:08Kurt Metzger?

  In the book. I love that book. And, and, uh...

• 2:40:11Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, it's good.

• 2:40:13Kurt Metzger?

  There's no way to make the sound come out, right?

• 2:40:14Duncan Trussell?

  I mean, you could find that confrontation with the Hells Angels on YouTube. You see...

• 2:40:18Kurt Metzger?

  I have to pee, but can we play Ari Mahdi's Amazing Things?

• 2:40:20Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, of course.

• 2:40:26Kurt Metzger?

  Um...

• 2:40:27Duncan Trussell?

  Do it.

• 2:40:28Kurt Metzger?

  Okay.

• 2:40:37Speaker 07

  Vodka and Sprite.

• 2:40:43Speaker 07

  Easy on the vodka.

• 2:40:50Speaker 07

  But still get me fucked up.

• 2:40:56Speaker 07

  Okay.

• 2:41:00Speaker 07

  You can put a little less Sprite.

• 2:41:09Duncan Trussell?

  It's great.

• 2:41:12Kurt Metzger?

  This is real hero weirdo house like he likes.

• 2:41:36Duncan Trussell?

  Guys, this has been episode 246 of The Mystery Boys. We'll be back next week with episode 35.

• 2:41:51Duncan Trussell?

  Okay, cool.

• 2:41:54Duncan Trussell?

  Is this the, is this the drop?

• 2:41:56Kurt Metzger?

  Yup.

• 2:42:05Speaker 07

  Vodka and Sprite.

• 2:42:10Duncan Trussell?

  Fuck yeah!

• 2:42:11Kurt Metzger?

  Oh my god. It goes on like that for quite some time.

• 2:42:14Duncan Trussell?

  You guys have been fans for years and we're so grateful to you for all your support.

• 2:42:18Kurt Metzger?

  I'm very grateful.

• 2:42:19Duncan Trussell?

  And we just want to take a walk back through the years and show you some of our favorite episodes of The Mystery Boys.

• 2:42:24Kurt Metzger?

  Which you will see in the future.

• 2:42:28Kurt Metzger?

  Well, uh, there you have it. Uh, beginning and the end of The Mystery Boys podcast, uh, we just get it out of the way. We like to put off starting it and then get it at the end out of the way. And now we just work our way back to the middle. It's as simple as that. Shouldn't be confusing. I don't want to read your stupid fucking chats of I don't even know what's going on in this show.

• 2:42:49Duncan Trussell?

  There are things living in the shadows! There are things living behind the walls!

• 2:42:54Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah.

• 2:42:55Duncan Trussell?

  There's something inside of all of us!

• 2:42:57Kurt Metzger?

  You hear that?

• 2:42:57Duncan Trussell?

  You didn't see it long before us!

• 2:42:59Kurt Metzger?

  Hope you're happy, because that was the last Mystery Boys ever.

• 2:43:04Kurt Metzger?

  Alright, we'll see you next week.