MTGM EXTRA! "Single ladies? Joanne's got you..."

Joanne finds herself in Texas and she's right at home... This is great news, but Vogue is more concerned about whether she's getting a pair of cowboy boots or not. Plus, validation for a long held theory about aeroplane toilets and a new found appreciation for Formula 1. My Therapist Ghosted Me is a Global Production. Join My Therapist Ghosted Me PLUS, now! Want ad-free listening on Global Player? Go to our show page https://www.globalplayer.com/podcasts/42KtTu/ and select the new subscription option. You can also watch ad free on YouTube! Click here https://www.youtube.com/@mtgmpod to visit our page and hit the join button for ad free episodes! Tickets for Joanne's tour Pinotphile are now LIVE: www.joannemcnally.com http://www.joannemcnally.com/ If you’d like to get in touch, you can send an email to [email protected] mailto:[email protected] Please review Global's Privacy Policy: https://global.com/legal/privacy-policy/ For merch, tour dates and more visit: www.mytherapistghostedme.com http://www.mytherapistghostedme.com/ This episode contains explicit language and adult themes that may not be suitable for all listeners.

• 0:00Speaker 00

  You're listening to a quick ad. You know what else is quick? Selling your car on Carvana. Just put in your vehicle information and we'll give you an offer. Done. No hassle, no negotiation, no guy from an online listing lowballing you. Which means by the time I'm done explaining this, you could have basically done it.

• 0:23Speaker 00

  Still haven't started? Hey, better late than ever. Sell your car today on Carvana. Pickup fees may apply.

• 0:32Speaker 01

  This is a global production.

• 0:34Speaker 02

  Public service announcement. I'm actually gonna do a TikTok about this. Any women living in Ireland or the UK who are looking to find love, potentially a husband, anything like that, your husband is in.

• 1:01Speaker 03

  Have you, has your face shrunk?

• 1:03Speaker 02

  It's America, so everything is bigger. We are just discussing the fact that I'm wearing, I'm very addicted to eye patches. I absolutely adore them. They give me a sense of wellness and reassurance and make me feel like they kind of erase whatever feral behaviour I've done the day before. But these ones are really large because I'm in America. Did I mention that?

• 1:27Speaker 04

  No, you've just got a tiny, tiny little head. It's the same ones.

• 1:31Speaker 02

  I'm on Ozempic, yeah. So my head shrunk so badly that now normal eye patches are like cars on my face.

• 1:37Speaker 03

  I want to tell you the ones that I love. Oh, yeah. Have you tried the cosmetic consult ones?

• 1:44Speaker 02

  No.

• 1:44Speaker 03

  They must have sent you them because they're that size. And if you put them in the fridge.

• 1:49Speaker 02

  Stop.

• 1:49Speaker 03

  In the fridge. My eyes are just like black sometimes. If like, if I hear someone's downstairs in the house and I have no time to put on makeup, I'll put them on because I honestly think that people will be like, because I have such black eyes.

• 2:02Speaker 02

  We have different under eye issues. You have, you, and I actually think it's quite sexy, cool and chic. You have kind of a darker, you have like a little panda eye. Whereas mine is hydration because obviously flying and whatever like, so mine is creppiness, whereas yours is colour. So.

• 2:20Speaker 03

  Panda eye.

• 2:21Speaker 02

  Yeah, but I, I love the panda eye. Like, do you know there's models in Vogue like drawing like under, like blackening their under eyes? Like, it's fucking cool. It's heroin chic.

• 2:31Speaker 03

  Well, I'm not actually putting any makeup on for the next recording. You will see. I was in Funky Monkey today and I even had to put on concealer when I got there because I was like, I'm gonna frighten all the children. That's how bad they've gotten.

• 2:42Speaker 02

  Funky Monkey? No, like, no, I would, I would, I would love a darker under eye if I was being honest.

• 2:50Speaker 03

  Bit of purple eyeshadow. Lovely. There you go.

• 2:53Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:54Speaker 03

  You are welcome, eh?

• 2:56Speaker 02

  Has no one seen my hat? No. What does it say?

• 2:59Speaker 03

  You've so many hats.

• 3:01Speaker 02

  It says.

• 3:01Speaker 03

  Die for darling.

• 3:03Speaker 02

  Yeah. I'm a Texan now.

• 3:05Speaker 04

  Oh, there's no G though. That's an apostrophe on the end.

• 3:08Speaker 02

  I'm a Texan. Am I Republican?

• 3:11Speaker 03

  I've ever seen.

• 3:12Speaker 02

  What's happening?

• 3:17Speaker 04

  You did send us a video of you on a mechanical bull.

• 3:21Speaker 03

  What was that about?

• 3:23Speaker 02

  Sorry, I sent, sorry. So for our listeners, can I say, I am on tour in the States and I like to send occasional videos to my two buddies, Vogue and Joe. Do they reply? No. I sent a very fun video of me on a mechanical bull for a really long time, actually, according to the locals.

• 3:46Speaker 04

  If they're watching on YouTube, can they see it now? Am I allowed to put it on YouTube?

• 3:49Speaker 02

  Yeah. They, and these two, my two favourite people in the world, left me on read.

• 3:55Speaker 03

  Well, what I will.

• 3:56Speaker 04

  That's not true. I said it looked like cultural appropriation.

• 3:59Speaker 02

  Yeah, Joe, you don't matter. It's only Vogue's approval I want.

• 4:02Speaker 03

  I was, I, do you know what? I looked at it and I meant to respond and then I got carried away. And also you're, you're doing a lot of humping these days. Like, it just felt very humpy again to me.

• 4:14Speaker 02

  I'm like, what does Vogue think? Vogue, hey?

• 4:18Speaker 03

  Do you remember getting them? You'd have all those blow up things for your birthdays and then you could get the pretend gladiators where you'd absolutely beat the shit out of each other. Do you remember them? What happened to them?

• 4:26Speaker 02

  No, I don't remember.

• 4:28Speaker 03

  People were blown away on, on Bouncy Castles. That happens. Sometimes people blow away on them. They're very dangerous.

• 4:33Speaker 02

  Well, I was gonna save the image of me gyrating on the ball for my memoir, but I'm willing to give it to the podcast.

• 4:40Speaker 03

  I think you should have.

• 4:40Speaker 02

  If Vogue, yeah, but Vogue, I'll only give it if you reply no and say haha lol. That's all I need.

• 4:48Speaker 03

  So lol. I, I allow my eyes out. I need to, I ignore what you say because I know that you're gonna say it to me on the pod and there's so many random, just like, there could just be a word and I'm like, oh, I wonder what that's about. I just wait. And then when we ask you on the pod, you don't remember what it's about.

• 5:07Speaker 02

  I know. So I'm into, I'm into Alice at the moment, but I was in Austin. Sorry, can I say, public service announcement? I'm actually gonna do a TikTok about this. Any women living in Ireland or the UK who are looking to find love, potentially a husband, anything like that, your husband is in Texas. I repeat, your husband is in Texas. If you are like me into jacked men with moustaches, baseball caps and without being cruel, maybe aren't vibing on Sudoku.

• 5:51Speaker 03

  Are you describing Spencer?

• 5:56Speaker 02

  Oh, these men would eat Spencer for breakfast, lunch and dinner. And I'm a, I'm a Spano fan. I think he's beautiful, but these men, wow, the fucking trucks. They look like they'd finger, like they're trying to hotwire a car.

• 6:12Speaker 03

  Jesus Christ, are still, people still fingering each other?

• 6:14Speaker 02

  I don't know. I, I heard that's what's still going on.

• 6:18Speaker 04

  Sorry, this is Austin you're talking about, is it?

• 6:20Speaker 02

  Texas.

• 6:20Speaker 03

  I'm looking.

• 6:21Speaker 04

  Just Texas generally, because Austin is a gay capital and you're talking about moustaches and jacked men.

• 6:26Speaker 02

  For fuck's sake, I didn't do it again, did I? Did I score a gay man again?

• 6:33Speaker 03

  I'm getting a lot of gay pictures.

• 6:34Speaker 02

  No, ones where I haven't heard from a.

• 6:36Speaker 03

  I put this, I put it in Google. Look at this. L, love wins and a guy in a, in one of the lovely, a gay t-shirt basically. Austin single gay males, Facebook. This is all the stuff that's going on when I said men in, in Austin. Oh my God, drag show, the top best men meeting older men. Yeah, Juman, this is bad now. I can say without any shadow of a doubt that all men in Austin are gay, just like Joe, Juman thinks that all men in Magic Mike are gay.

• 7:16Speaker 02

  This is why he insisted I wear that fake moustache and turned me around. Is that what you're saying?

• 7:21Speaker 03

  Did you meet someone?

• 7:22Speaker 02

  No, I'm obviously taking the piss. God, no.

• 7:25Speaker 03

  Did you meet any men? Come on, you're in the pub, you're gyrating on that ball.

• 7:28Speaker 02

  Oh my God, oh my God, I'm so glad you asked me because I forgot about this. So I, I went to the, I was invited into the Formula One by Mercedes, right? Which was honestly one of the best experiences of my life. Like, I was, I was in the garage. Like, so I misunderstood. I thought it was just like an Irish woman being like, I hear, I'll throw you a pass. I didn't realise there was, it was like a press thing. I just didn't really get the size of it, if you know what I mean. So obviously I rocked in after lunch, blah, blah, blah, very casual. And they're like, we'd hold, you were supposed to be like driving around with Kimmy and all. And I was like, oh, I, I wasn't aware. Sorry. I know, fucking moron.

• 8:08Speaker 03

  Wait, but did you go, did you go the day of the race or did you go the day before?

• 8:12Speaker 02

  Day before the real race.

• 8:13Speaker 03

  That's, I think that's really fun because I don't think that you can see the race properly unless you're watching on TV, but at least you still get to see all the cars and like, proper watch it.

• 8:22Speaker 02

  I've been radicalised, Vogue. We're, we're F1 girlies now and we drive for Mercedes. I might even get my licence back.

• 8:29Speaker 03

  I drive, I'm with Williams. Sven's brother works for Williams. I have to be with Williams. Sorry, I know, I know. I'm sorry.

• 8:39Speaker 03

  Oh no, I didn't know that.

• 8:42Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 8:43Speaker 03

  Hold on, how come you're actually there?

• 8:44Speaker 02

  Sorry, how come you've never brought me to the F1? If you're involved.

• 8:49Speaker 03

  Well, I didn't know if you were into into F1 and now that I know that you're into. But now it's like, it's pretty hard to get to be going. You still have to be invited by somebody.

• 8:57Speaker 02

  Well, so this.

• 8:58Speaker 03

  Sven's brother isn't just gonna take us all the time.

• 9:00Speaker 02

  Of course.

• 9:00Speaker 03

  There's lots of people who wanna go.

• 9:02Speaker 02

  I understand, I understand. But anyway, so.

• 9:04Speaker 03

  Did you love it? Isn't this noise and everything? It's just so much fun.

• 9:08Speaker 02

  I was, it was honestly, I was blown away. I was squealing. So anyway, I had this, they gave me like this paddock pass. Now, I'm aware, look, I'm obviously in a lovely position that they invited me in. And I, I'm sure there's F1 fans out there who are like, you're a spoiled bitch, she doesn't deserve it. And I get all that. But now I'm all about it. So I was in the paddock. So I went into the garage where, so you sit in the garage while they're like putting the wheels on and off and all. It was nuts. And the lads, Kimmy and George were like driving in and out and all. It was insane. And then there was a photographer in the garage and he was taking photos of me on the sly. And of course I was like, okay.

• 9:51Speaker 02

  You're making it really obvious, but I'm into it. And then the press, the press person, Ayla, she invited me in, was like, oh, I asked him to get some photos. I was like, oh, all right, okay, that, that, that explains that. But then the photo, I put the photo online and someone wrote, this is giving Obama watching for the assassination of Bin Laden. Cause I was so serious, cause it felt really serious. And I was trying to be hot for the photographer that I thought fancied me, but was actually just doing his job.

• 10:18Speaker 03

  I love the Formula One. My dad used to watch it all the time and I loved being hungover. And you know, when you're a bit like, you're a bit anxious when you're hungover. I loved lying on the couch and just hearing the noise of the Formula One. I'd be like, oh.

• 10:29Speaker 02

  It's amazing. Well.

• 10:30Speaker 03

  I feel safe.

• 10:31Speaker 02

  Vogue, I wanted to invite you and Joe, cause now I'm a Mercedes F1 gal, to, myself and Kimmy are going to Las Vegas. For the Formula.

• 10:42Speaker 04

  Sorry, you actually are, you're going again?

• 10:45Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 10:47Speaker 03

  Stop.

• 10:48Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 10:48Speaker 03

  Did Vegas not already happen?

• 10:50Speaker 02

  Kimmy's driving me over. No, I'm, I'm going off my own bat.

• 10:54Speaker 03

  Yeah, but I, I think Vegas might have happened. Did it not happen yet?

• 10:57Speaker 02

  No, no. Listen, I am in, I am, I'm in the, I am literally on the team now.

• 11:02Speaker 03

  Did you get like team hats and everything?

• 11:04Speaker 02

  They're sending me the jacket.

• 11:05Speaker 03

  Oh my God, but Joanne, you missed hospitality.

• 11:08Speaker 02

  I don't think I, I don't think I did miss the hospitality, cause I had three wines.

• 11:10Speaker 03

  I thought you went after them. That's all you got, three wines.

• 11:14Speaker 02

  I know, I did. I missed the lunch. I missed the lunch. I missed the lunch, cause I didn't understand what was happening. I didn't get it. I thought I was just being snuck in by an Irish woman. I didn't understand what was happening. But I tell you, I fucking won't miss it again, Vogue. And I think you should come with me.

• 11:29Speaker 03

  I can't go anywhere. I've got the baby. I have to take him everywhere. I know, I know. I'm, I'm around London though, and I'm, he can come to the pub. He just, I wouldn't meet, I wouldn't take him to the Formula One. Even I have limits.

• 11:43Speaker 02

  Joe, if you fancy abandoning your family and coming to Las Vegas, I have a plus one for the paddock.

• 11:49Speaker 03

  Josie.

• 11:50Speaker 04

  I'll fly that over with, with my wife in, in just to set when we're off this corner. I'll let you know how that goes.

• 11:56Speaker 03

  My God.

• 11:57Speaker 02

  This is where I need more single friends.

• 12:04Speaker 02

  I was glad I came to Dallas, cause it was a lovely show. But listen, I am vroom, vroom. I'm in, I'm in the team.

• 12:10Speaker 04

  Yep.

• 12:11Speaker 02

  Mercedes for life.

• 12:11Speaker 03

  How many of those cars, like 15 million, no, you can't, I, well, do you know what? Actually, I'm always a turncoat. I'll be whoever's doing the best hospitality.

• 12:20Speaker 02

  I know, I know. You're like, oh, yes, they sell hand grenades, but they've got a great spread.

• 12:30Speaker 03

  And they only do high-end champagne. Perfect.

• 12:34Speaker 02

  It's so funny, but anyway, that was, it was really exciting. So yeah, maybe that's something we can do as a team, us.

• 12:41Speaker 03

  We do need to have a Christmas party. It's kind of bad. Like, we can't not have a Christmas party. I'm not having a Christmas party in Joanne's house again. Not after last year.

• 12:50Speaker 02

  Jesus, Vogue, you need to fucking toughen up. Like, I, I think I did, I think I did a spinning class the next morning and you're still talking about how wrecked you were after it.

• 13:00Speaker 03

  I'm not going to her house for a party.

• 13:05Speaker 03

  I'm only around the corner now. It's official. I'm around the corner.

• 13:09Speaker 02

  It's where I was puff daddy.

• 13:12Speaker 03

  There was a lot of baby oil.

• 13:14Speaker 02

  There was a lot of fucking baby oil.

• 13:16Speaker 03

  She had me in the bath at one stage.

• 13:19Speaker 02

  I was trying to wash the tan off you, cause I was like, I can't have her sitting on the white couch with all that tan on her.

• 13:26Speaker 03

  Can somebody please Google, Joe, Google men in Austin, Texas and just go to images. I was just about to close the frame there.

• 13:33Speaker 02

  Sorry, I'm telling you now.

• 13:34Speaker 03

  Good, single guys in Austin, Texas. And there's a man with a moustache.

• 13:41Speaker 03

  Hundred percent gay. Hang on, I have to say.

• 13:45Speaker 02

  Sorry, no.

• 13:45Speaker 03

  There's two lads here in the pool, absolute riffle. Joanne, Joanne, you, your gaydar is so bad.

• 13:54Speaker 02

  I like a bad and my, my, I think my kind of thing is, and, and please don't take offence to anyone I've been with in the past or anyone I will be with in the future. This is just, I'm not saying that this is what they are, what, this is what they were. I like them jacked and thick.

• 14:11Speaker 04

  Whoa.

• 14:13Speaker 03

  Well, everyone has a type.

• 14:15Speaker 02

  Sorry, I should say, sorry, I should correct myself and say, apparently, that's what I go for. No offence to anyone in my past, no offence to anyone in my future, but when I meet men at the bar, in the dive bars, cause I'm a dive bar darling in Texas, it seems to be, that's my vibe.

• 14:33Speaker 03

  Have you gotten any cowboy boots or no? Just got rotten fucking hat.

• 14:37Speaker 02

  Just, excuse me?

• 14:38Speaker 04

  Oh dear.

• 14:39Speaker 02

  Excuse, wow. Jealousy doesn't suit you, Vogue. Jealousy doesn't suit you.

• 14:45Speaker 03

  Joe, would you buy that hat if you saw it?

• 14:47Speaker 02

  Jealousy doesn't suit you.

• 14:48Speaker 04

  Is it sort of camouflaged for people that go hunting? Is that the idea?

• 14:52Speaker 03

  She's a trophy hunter now.

• 14:54Speaker 04

  Yeah. You know, the sort of people who shoot lions.

• 14:56Speaker 02

  It's cowhide, guys. Look, if you don't live in Texas, you don't get it.

• 15:00Speaker 03

  It's not cowhide. How have you not got a pair of cowboy boots? And you haven't even rang me from a cowboy boot shop to ask me what size I am.

• 15:10Speaker 02

  Hon, I don't, I haven't ventured into the men's section yet, so I can't shop for you.

• 15:16Speaker 03

  It's true. You probably would have to go to the men's sections. They're all dainty little feet over there. I couldn't squeeze my foot in.

• 15:23Speaker 02

  I don't, I'm, I'm trying to, I only, you know yourself, I can't be buying stuff on the road. Like, I have a couple, I still have a couple more weeks here.

• 15:30Speaker 03

  God, hurry up. And then, and then you're home to me for how long?

• 15:34Speaker 02

  Um, I'm home for a good bit then, actually. And then, of course, I go back to the grid for Formula One in November in Las Vegas.

• 15:44Speaker 03

  You're sorry, you're flying back to Vegas to go to the Formula One. You know that they have like, they have it in. Why don't you go to Monaco, Monaco? Go to Monaco. Not until the summer, but still.

• 15:55Speaker 02

  Good idea. I'll learn.

• 15:56Speaker 03

  Flying the whole way to Las Vegas, but you're not just waiting over here.

• 16:03Speaker 02

  No, no, no, no. I'm part of the team now. And Kimmy's won and he, he's gonna wanna see me really soon.

• 16:09Speaker 03

  Oh my God. Before I forget, before I forget, I have to tell you the worst story that I've ever heard in my fucking life. Okay, you ready? So I'm gonna try not out who these people are. Imagine being in your house and you're the most hungover you've ever been. And you're so hungover and you're waiting for your kids to go to bed or whoever's annoying you to go to bed. So my brother and his wife, I can say who it is. My brother and his wife, they were completely hungover. Okay. And they were, they, they just moved into their new house and like, they said it was a state, there was shit everywhere. And like, Emma was like, I need to go to bed. I'm absolutely wrecked. And like half seven, she was going up to bed. Like, I was in bed at half seven last night. And so she's getting her pyjamas on and taking off her makeup. And my brother was just like clearing her up a bit downstairs and the door rang.

• 16:57Speaker 03

  Two, a couple they know had called over and they're like, hey, we're here for dinner. And Frederick was like, no, no, it's no, it's next week. No, it's, it's tonight.

• 17:09Speaker 02

  Oh no.

• 17:11Speaker 03

  Emma had to come downstairs and she said she was like literally like decrep and she was like, she had to put a makeup on. She had to open a bottle of prosecco and try and like drink through. And they said that like they were sitting there till like half twelve and like they had to order Chinese. Obviously they had no food in because it was a fucking week. And they're sitting there at the table. Can you imagine having to entertain when you're absolutely dying? And then they wanted to see the house and they were like, no, it's like a bomb size.

• 17:40Speaker 02

  There's an SNL sketch, there's an SNL sketch with Sabrina Carpenter in it. And it's, it's exactly that. So it's like her and her fella, her and her husband are on the couch. And she gets it. I think the sketch is called like Plans or something like that. And it's from her cousin and she's like, hey, we're just around the corner, see you in five. And it's, it's actually really funny, similar vibe. I'd highly recommend. There's nothing worse. Like I, I would cancel until they're on the door. No, sorry. If they've left their own home, then you can't cancel.

• 18:13Speaker 03

  I mean, I think my brother was trying to get rid of them when he was like, no, not next week, next week. But I think you just, if you knew they got it wrong, I think I'd just go home. I'd be like, oh.

• 18:24Speaker 02

  No, you can't, you can't. You're like, you're here now. And I bet they had a nice time in the end. I bet they did.

• 18:30Speaker 03

  No, if I'm hungover, the next day I have to go home. I have to be in bed really early. I cannot, I couldn't have to be entertaining anybody. Um, Joe, what's the announcement? Sorry. I don't know what you're talking about.

• 18:41Speaker 04

  There's an announcement to do. We have announcements.

• 18:46Speaker 02

  I'll just listen for the announcement, Vogue, on the edge of my bed here.

• 18:50Speaker 04

  Literally.

• 18:51Speaker 03

  Okay, okay, let's go. Our Joanne, Joe, are you ready?

• 18:55Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 18:56Speaker 03

  Because we have news, we have news. You can now subscribe to us for ad free episodes on Global Player and YouTube. You're welcome.

• 19:08Speaker 02

  Thank God.

• 19:10Speaker 03

  Joanne, you got your Apple Pay on the go. You get ready to pay up. Uh, here's how you do it. If you want ad free episodes on Global Player, you simply go to Global Player and go to our podcast page. Then you're going to see a new subscription option, only if you choose to do that. Uh, and you can click on it, select your package, and then using Apple Pay, Google Pay or a payment card, you complete the transaction. And voila, you've now got ad free episodes on Global Player.

• 19:36Speaker 02

  That is great news.

• 19:37Speaker 04

  That's not all.

• 19:39Speaker 03

  That is absolutely, don't you, if you think that I'm finished, you forget about it. If you want to subscribe on YouTube, just head to our more therapist ghosted me YouTube channel, which is MTGM pod. And hit the join button for ad free episodes on YouTube. And if you sign up, you'll also get a newsletter from the production team. So get signed up. Joe, is that you a little bit more on your plate?

• 20:00Speaker 04

  It will have some of my deepest thoughts and some backstage bits and things you might not know. And it might even have screenshots from messages I exchanged with you two.

• 20:12Speaker 02

  Oh, I'll, I'll send it. I'll, I'll send in my smear test results. If you're looking for kind of like nice BTS bits. Yeah, no problem. Well, this, this is all news to me and thank you, Vogue, for announcing that so well. And also.

• 20:30Speaker 03

  It's not actually news to Joanne. She was told about it.

• 20:33Speaker 04

  She was told about it. Yeah. But she's forgotten and that's okay.

• 20:37Speaker 02

  Sorry, I have a lot on my plate.

• 20:39Speaker 03

  That's okay.

• 20:40Speaker 02

  I'm fucking trying to crack America like a creme brulee. It's, it's, it's, it's, I'm on a mission over here. And I'm, I'm part of the Mercedes team now. Like there's, I gotta stay focused.

• 20:50Speaker 03

  She's here. We're lucky she's here.

• 20:52Speaker 02

  You are, you are lucky.

• 20:53Speaker 03

  God bless, God bless.

• 20:54Speaker 02

  But there's, I, I subscribe to podcasts. I like it as an idea.

• 20:58Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 20:58Speaker 02

  It's a, I like the accent. I like the additional bits that comes with the pay, the subscribing. That's why I subscribe.

• 21:04Speaker 03

  Well, Joe, I'm looking forward to your newsletter.

• 21:06Speaker 02

  Joe, are you writing that newsletter?

• 21:09Speaker 04

  Uh, me with Izzy as well. Izzy is not this, I can't say it's all going to be me. Izzy, our, our, our social media producer will also be writing it with me. There'll be lots in there. You'll just have to subscribe and see.

• 21:21Speaker 02

  Well, I'm happy to send voice notes.

• 21:24Speaker 04

  Brilliant. And we'll, we'll include them with no editing.

• 21:28Speaker 03

  Ooh, Emma made us do this the other day when we had just had micro needling done, me and Amber. So if you're watching this on mine and Amber's pods and you're wondering why we look like dog shit, that's why.

• 21:40Speaker 03

  Amber looks particularly.

• 21:42Speaker 02

  I'm so jealous.

• 21:43Speaker 03

  Okay, let's do an email. We've got, I think we should do validation after many years. Hi girls and Joe. Love the pod. Been a listener for years. Remember ages ago, Joanne read a story of someone being hit by a huge, by a huge block of urine that came out of a plane. It was a shard of urine, wasn't it?

• 22:01Speaker 02

  It was a frozen shaft is how I would describe it. And then I went back and looked at the photo a couple of years after, and then couldn't get over the fact that I actually believed it was true. It was basically like sketched.

• 22:12Speaker 04

  Well.

• 22:15Speaker 03

  Okay. I was in my garden today and there was a sanitary pad inflated to the max and filled with pure ice. It's 12 degrees out, so there's no way it happened at ground level. I have pictures, but would not send without your consent, of course. Attach is what Google made of it. Huh? Yeah, do send.

• 22:33Speaker 02

  Oh, we consent. Oh God, I consent all over the place for this.

• 22:37Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 22:38Speaker 04

  Joanne, I've just sent you what Google made of this emailer's experience. This is what Google said.

• 22:45Speaker 02

  Hmm. How is it possible for a sanitary pad to be filled with frozen water to land in my garden with 12 degrees?

• 22:52Speaker 03

  Oh.

• 22:53Speaker 02

  Um, rare aviation event known as a blue ice incident combined with foreign object flushing. Despite it being a mild.

• 23:04Speaker 03

  Just flush them down the toilet for God's sake.

• 23:06Speaker 02

  Well, it, it, the item fell from a commercial aircraft. Shut up. Cruising at high altitude where temperature, temperatures are extremely sub zero. Oh my God, this woman is so lucky. That sanitary pad should be in a museum. I'd put it in a bell jar.

• 23:26Speaker 03

  Can you imagine that landed on somebody and killed them? And you had to say how, what was the cause of death? She died by sanitary pads. That'd be awful.

• 23:34Speaker 02

  Have we, do we speak about Spencer in the carrot or do we not?

• 23:38Speaker 03

  Oh, and Spenny nearly died from the carrot, choking on the carrot.

• 23:40Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 23:41Speaker 03

  Are you telling me I haven't told you this story? And I just, I tell you about Neil breaking his legs all the time.

• 23:46Speaker 02

  Well, I wasn't sure if we were publicly talking about him.

• 23:49Speaker 03

  Yeah, he was chewing on a, like, he's, is Spenny, when he eats, he inhales food. He, like, he's just, like, starving and he just can't get enough. If you ever watch him and like, if you ever see him doing his little pepper, it's, it's mad to watch. And, and he was eating a bag of carrots, uh, like the carrot batons and obviously stuff in this, like, one time he bit his own finger.

• 24:09Speaker 02

  Sorry, sorry, sorry. Of course Spencer Matthews was eating a baton. Like God forbid, he'd just eaten a normal carrot. It's a baton.

• 24:18Speaker 03

  Well, once he was eating his food so fast, he bit his own finger and he said it was the most painful thing he's ever done to himself. But he, uh, so basically he started choking on the carrot baton. And he was like, he couldn't get it out and he just couldn't get it out. So he started like body slamming himself on the ground. And then he was just thinking in his head, it's, everyone's going to just say that he died from eating a bag of.

• 24:40Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 24:41Speaker 03

  Carrot batons from Tesco.

• 24:43Speaker 02

  Spencer Matthews choked to death on a carrot baton. Like it's, I can see the headline now. Humiliating.

• 24:50Speaker 03

  He'll be first in line for the Darwin Awards. Um, he said it was really scary though. It would be awful.

• 24:56Speaker 02

  Of course. Yeah, of course it was. Um, how it happened. Sorry. So while airlines never intentionally dump toilet waste in midair, plumbing malfunctions do occasionally happen. When a passenger flushes a restricted item like a sanitary pad down an airplane vacuum toilet, it can create a partial blockage or compromise the seals. We need a photo. Joe, will you mail her back? Will you?

• 25:21Speaker 04

  She'll, she'll hear this. Hopefully she'll send it in and I will send it to you the second I see it.

• 25:25Speaker 02

  You know, I love anything aviation.

• 25:27Speaker 03

  Sanitary pads down the toilet.

• 25:29Speaker 02

  In the, because there's no, there's no rules in the sky.

• 25:31Speaker 03

  Well, Theodore is obsessed. It's like you with, well, he's obsessed with you because he loves the traders, by the way. And he is obsessed with you. Um, but now he, he loves, he loves, I've told him about Malaysian Airlines. Cause he was telling me about this other story he'd heard about a plane. And I told him about Malaysian Airlines. He's just going right down here. I'm telling everybody.

• 25:52Speaker 02

  Yeah, get him in.

• 25:53Speaker 03

  Don't tell little people. They'll be frightened, Theodore.

• 25:56Speaker 02

  No, get him in. Uh, when I see him next, I'm going to tell him about, I'm going to talk to him about Malaysian Airlines and how I constantly think, not constantly, that's too much. Regularly think about the bodies still in the seat belts in the sea.

• 26:08Speaker 03

  Oh, don't tell him that.

• 26:10Speaker 04

  Okay. All right then.

• 26:13Speaker 02

  He's old enough now. What is he, what, what age is he now?

• 26:16Speaker 03

  Theodore, just consider those bodies still under.

• 26:19Speaker 02

  Yeah, just think about them. When you're going to sleep tonight in your warm bed, Theodore, think about those poor, poor people strapped to their seats in the sea.

• 26:27Speaker 03

  It's absolutely awful. Now, I'd like to think, no, I think they were all dead before.

• 26:33Speaker 02

  Yeah, no, they were for sure. I think he, he turned off the oxygen and stuff. Yeah.

• 26:37Speaker 03

  They're in the Indian Ocean. So they're in a nice part of the ocean where there's like this lovely sea life and everything. So.

• 26:43Speaker 02

  It's absolutely nuts. It's nuts.

• 26:46Speaker 03

  On that note, I shouldn't have opened that tin of worms, everybody. Uh, thank you. Sorry. Actually, I just had one fungi update for you because we were talking about it yesterday in my auntie's house. And they said that when you pay, pay to go out and see fungi when he was alive, it was literally a money back guarantee. So if you didn't see him, they'd give you your money back because he was always, always so professional and just gave.

• 27:13Speaker 02

  So professional.

• 27:15Speaker 03

  My cousin was like, but we were.

• 27:17Speaker 02

  He'd never let you down.

• 27:18Speaker 03

  He wouldn't, he wouldn't bring us home.

• 27:21Speaker 02

  He'd never let you down. He was just obviously a stage. He was a stage kid.

• 27:26Speaker 03

  A stage dolphin. Yeah, he was. Okay.

• 27:29Speaker 02

  Like it wouldn't matter what stage I was in, I'd turn, I'd turn up for the show. Do you know what I mean? We're similar like that, me and fungi. Yeah.

• 27:38Speaker 03

  Okay. Bye, everybody.