MFM Minisode 512

This week’s hometowns include a boyfriend baby modeling contest and a third man encounter. For our sources, please visit https://www.myfavoritemurder.com/episodes. Support this podcast by shopping our latest sponsor deals and promotions at this link: https://bit.ly/3UFCn1g. Head to social media to share your favorite moments from this episode. Instagram: instagram.com/myfavoritemurder http://instagram.com/myfavoritemurder Facebook: facebook.com/myfavoritemurder http://facebook.com/myfavoritemurder TikTok: tiktok.com/@my_favorite_murder http://tiktok.com/@my_favorite_murder Send your hometown stories to [email protected]. Join the Fan Cult to access ad-free episodes of My Favorite Murder. Members also receive merch store discounts, exclusive audio and video content and more! Visit www.fancult.supercast.com http://www.fancult.supercast.com/ to join. Shop for My Favorite Murder and other Exactly Right merchandise here:www.exactlyrightstore.com https://www.exactlyrightstore.com. Rate, review and follow My Favorite Murder on the iHeartRadio, Apple Podcasts, Spotify or wherever you like to listen. See omnystudio.com/listener https://omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:06Georgia Hardstark?

  In New Orleans, truckers kept getting sideswiped the exact same way.

• 0:09Karen Kilgariff?

  When a man is found murdered under questionable circumstances related to these accidents, that's when the rubber hits the road.

• 0:16Georgia Hardstark?

  And what the feds uncover is a complex scheme of staged wrecks, financial fraud, and a pair of conspiring lovers behind it.

• 0:23Karen Kilgariff?

  This is a story about fake accidents that led to real consequences.

• 0:27Georgia Hardstark?

  Listen to Over My Dead Body: Operation Sideswipe wherever you get your podcasts.

• 0:31Karen Kilgariff?

  Audible subscribers can binge all episodes early and ad-free right now.

• 0:35Georgia Hardstark?

  Join Audible in the Audible app or by subscribing on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Goodbye. You know a favorite M-word? Magnesium.

• 0:43Karen Kilgariff?

  Like the kind that's in Dr. Teal's magnesium spray.

• 0:46Georgia Hardstark?

  Made from a proprietary blend of topical minerals, it's designed to relax and prepare you for a night of rest.

• 0:51Karen Kilgariff?

  If you need a reset after your day, make Dr. Teal's magnesium spray part of your nighttime routine.

• 0:56Georgia Hardstark?

  Generously spritz each foot before bed, and you'll be all set. I've actually started doing this, and I'm obsessed with magnesium. It does everything.

• 1:03Karen Kilgariff?

  Something like this is just like, it's simple, it's easy, and it actually works.

• 1:07Georgia Hardstark?

  Totally. For wellness you can feel, find Dr. Teal's magnesium spray online or in your local bath aisle.

• 1:12Karen Kilgariff?

  Goodbye.

• 1:30Karen Kilgariff?

  Hello and welcome.

• 1:32Georgia Hardstark?

  To my favorite murder.

• 1:33Karen Kilgariff?

  The minisode.

• 1:34Georgia Hardstark?

  We read you, your stories.

• 1:36Karen Kilgariff?

  And you love it.

• 1:37Georgia Hardstark?

  We love it, we love it. Let's do it. I'm gonna go first this time, right?

• 1:40Karen Kilgariff?

  Do it.

• 1:41Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah, okay. This is called How I Met the Third Man in Hawaii. And the third man is that story I've done before. I did a long time ago of like a ghosty person saving, helping save your life, and then there was nobody there.

• 1:52Karen Kilgariff?

  Yes, I love these stories.

• 1:54Georgia Hardstark?

  Okay. This is kind of long, but hopefully so is their life. Okay. Hello, kind strangers who give us weekly tales of ghastly deeds and human triumph. Last month, while vacationing in Hawaii, I had the unfortunate, or maybe fortunate, luck of, quote, "meeting the third man." I'm a 46-year-old male and a decent swimmer, though slightly overweight, which, as I found out, does not equate to buoyancy. I've been snorkeling in Honolulu before when I was younger, and because of this, I probably overestimated my current abilities. Yeah, 46, we do that a lot.

• 2:28Karen Kilgariff?

  You're just like, ugh, I've done that before. So easy.

• 2:31Georgia Hardstark?

  I'm still in great shape.

• 2:32Karen Kilgariff?

  Let's go.

• 2:33Georgia Hardstark?

  It happened three days into vacation when my wife and I headed to the beach with our two boys, 17 and 5. Afternoon winds and waves tend to churn up the waters a bit on the beach, so I couldn't see the reef when I headed into the water for what I thought would be some light snorkeling. Unfortunately, as I would later find out, I picked a spot on the beach right in the middle of what is listed on the map as Gray's Channel, which happens to have very little reef and is actually the deepest stretch of the whole ocean.

• 3:00Karen Kilgariff?

  Oh, the whole thing?

• 3:02Georgia Hardstark?

  I mean, of that ocean. I don't know, maybe. A few other vacationers nearby were snorkeling in the same area, and I heard one excitedly call out that there was a sea turtle probably 50 or 60 feet to my right. After staring down at sand for the last 15 minutes, I turned to their voices and put in some good kicks, hoping to catch some video of the turtle with my GoPro wristwatch. Just experience it. Why are we always filming?

• 3:26Karen Kilgariff?

  Why do you have to capture it and make, why do you have to make it into content? We'll be right back.

• 3:32Georgia Hardstark?

  Right. Speaking of, and as I approached them, that's when things went sideways. My chest tightened up. I felt lightheaded, and I realized that I was in trouble. This was an asthma attack.

• 3:44Karen Kilgariff?

  What? A scuba diving asthma attack?

• 3:46Georgia Hardstark?

  Who knew?

• 3:47Karen Kilgariff?

  Fuck.

• 3:48Georgia Hardstark?

  I turned ahead to shore, and that's when I realized how far out I had gone. I could see the shore, but I was about 100 yards away. Now, when you're having an asthma attack on land, for most cases, it's not a huge deal. You take a few puffs of your inhaler, and on your way. In the water, though, there are complications. First of all, I went out like a dummy with no flotation, just me, a snorkel, and some flippers to keep myself afloat. Less air in your lungs means less buoyancy to stay up. Breathing through a tube in this state is not ideal, and to pile on further, kicking your legs is drawing away critical oxygen in the blood that you're trying to use to breathe. And when I started to have trouble keeping my head above water and tried raising my

• 4:30Georgia Hardstark?

  hands and calling for help, that's also when I realized no help was coming. In addition to being in the deepest part of the beach, I was also in a section that had zero lifeguards, and nobody could hear me. I rolled onto my back, switched on the camera, and started to say goodbye to my family.

• 4:45Karen Kilgariff?

  Wow.

• 4:46Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah.

• 4:47Karen Kilgariff?

  That's so scary.

• 4:48Georgia Hardstark?

  I know.

• 4:49Karen Kilgariff?

  It just turns like that.

• 4:50Georgia Hardstark?

  100 yards is so far, like, when you think about it as like shore and how far you have to swim during an asthma attack.

• 4:58Karen Kilgariff?

  Yes, and no one seeing or hearing you or...

• 5:00Georgia Hardstark?

  No. That's when I, quote, "met the third man." I never saw anyone with my eyes, but there was suddenly the sensation of another person there and a voice that I could hear. Quote, "Stop talking to the camera. You're burning air. You might still be able to make it. Take a bearing on the shore, float on your back, and start kicking. Even if you don't get all the way on your own, you'll be closer to shore, and someone might be able to get to you in time the closer you are."

• 5:26Karen Kilgariff?

  Yes.

• 5:26Georgia Hardstark?

  End quote. So I did what I was told and started kicking my way back while still struggling with the tightness in my rib cage. No talking, every movement calculated on getting back to shore, get a few breaths, keep going. It took me about 10 minutes until I finally felt my flippers hit the bottom, by which point the family had realized something was wrong. My oldest son had to haul me out onto dry land as waves carried me up the last 50 feet or so, and that's when the voice departed with a, "See? You made it." My legs and arms were numb from exhaustion, and for the next hour, I could not move. I just yacked and then laid there, focusing on breathing. Fun note, I had also left my inhaler back in the hotel room, so no relief from that. Bro.

• 6:07Karen Kilgariff?

  That is an unrealistic asthmatic right there.

• 6:10Georgia Hardstark?

  Totally. I'll be fine.

• 6:12Karen Kilgariff?

  It's fun.

• 6:13Georgia Hardstark?

  I haven't talked with too many people about what happened, because I feel like even after reading about the third man and hearing you guys talk about it, a disembodied voice telling you to shut up and giving you directions in the middle of the ocean would probably sound a bit nuts to most. Thanks for taking us along for the ride every week. Stay sexy and fight for every last effing breath. Smarticus is the name they use. Anonymous, like, Smarticus.

• 6:39Karen Kilgariff?

  Wow, that's, first of all, very meaningful to me that Smarticus would share his third man experience with us. Because it's like, yeah, you would be kind of embarrassed, but we love this shit.

• 6:49Georgia Hardstark?

  Right. And then I wonder if he hadn't listened to that episode, if he would have either not listened to it or just like blown it off.

• 6:56Karen Kilgariff?

  Right.

• 6:56Georgia Hardstark?

  So we saved his life, is what I'm trying to say.

• 6:58Karen Kilgariff?

  Yeah, it absolutely was us there in Hawaii. It might as well, we are the third man.

• 7:02Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah.

• 7:02Karen Kilgariff?

  Third and fourth.

• 7:03Georgia Hardstark?

  Now you owe us a trip to Hawaii.

• 7:06Karen Kilgariff?

  That's what we have figured out. But I do love that idea where, in the stories I've heard, like that one and others, where it isn't a familiar voice. It isn't like, "My grandmother came to me." It's literally like some weird right in your ear, like, "Do this, don't do that, get it together."

• 7:22Georgia Hardstark?

  And do this in a way like you weren't thinking that you could do that. Like floating on your back and doing backstrokes to tell you can get close enough and they can find you, like, didn't cross his mind. He had to like hear it from an outside voice.

• 7:34Karen Kilgariff?

  Right. And kind of like a voice that said, "Don't give up. You have to start, and here's how you can start. It's not impossible. Just like cut through."

• 7:43Georgia Hardstark?

  Totally.

• 7:44Karen Kilgariff?

  I know I've talked about this before, but I recommend the podcast Snapped a bunch of times. It's amazing. But it's people telling their own first-person stories, and there is a woman who tells a childhood story of the third man coming to get her to basically run away from people who were trying to kid, like a truck that was trying to follow her when she was on her bike.

• 8:06Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah.

• 8:07Karen Kilgariff?

  And it was a third man voice in her ear basically going, "Run now, stop."

• 8:12Georgia Hardstark?

  Stop, yeah.

• 8:12Karen Kilgariff?

  It is like...

• 8:14Georgia Hardstark?

  It's called Snap, the podcast?

• 8:15Karen Kilgariff?

  You snapped. God, it's so good.

• 8:17Georgia Hardstark?

  Amazing.

• 8:20Karen Kilgariff?

  Anyway, very similar story here. The subject line of this email is "Lemonade Stand Scam." Hello, I heard a lemonade stand story in Minisode 508, and I knew I needed to tell my lemonade stand story. It says, "I live in a northern cold place where winter lasts nine months and summer must be fully taken advantage of. A couple of years ago, it was the first nice day of the year. It was a Sunday morning, a nice 65 degrees, and everyone was coming out of their homes to enjoy the weather. I was driving, listening to music with the windows down, and feeling extra chipper. So when I saw a little kid manning a lemonade stand, I decided to pull over. I asked the little boy how much he was charging, and he said 25 cents for a small and 50 cents for a large.

• 9:04Karen Kilgariff?

  I felt like spending the big buckets, so I told him I'd take a large, and I rummaged through my car for two quarters. Once I handed him the money, he broke the news to me. He said, 'Well, we don't have any lemonade yet. We just have water.'"

• 9:19Karen Kilgariff?

  I was a little shocked, but I said I'd take the water. He proceeded to pour me warm water in a glass Tiki Man cup. Yes, like those souvenir cups you get that look like you're drinking out of a Tiki Man, but glass. He then handed it to me as I took a sip and then he said, I'm gonna need that cup back when you're done. At that point, I took one more sip, handed him back the warm water in a cup and politely told him, I'm not thirsty and he can use the water for his nearby plants. So many things went through my head. Where did this water actually come from?

• 9:51Georgia Hardstark?

  Oh, God.

• 9:52Karen Kilgariff?

  Had he used this cup on other people already? Would he clean it after I drank out of it?

• 9:58Georgia Hardstark?

  Absolutely not.

• 9:58Karen Kilgariff?

  Would he actually dump out the water?

• 10:00Georgia Hardstark?

  Yes, exactly.

• 10:02Karen Kilgariff?

  The whole thing seemed a little too sketchy for me. Too sketchy after you took the sip.

• 10:08Georgia Hardstark?

  Totally.

• 10:08Karen Kilgariff?

  But I do appreciate his strategy to make sure he secured that 50 cents. Anyway, stay sexy and make sure you have the product in hand before handing over the cash, Jay.

• 10:19Georgia Hardstark?

  Wow.

• 10:20Karen Kilgariff?

  Yeah. Learning and growing here on the mini show.

• 10:23Georgia Hardstark?

  Early scammers.

• 10:24Karen Kilgariff?

  Yeah.

• 10:25Georgia Hardstark?

  That's fucking hilarious.

• 10:26Karen Kilgariff?

  We don't have lemons right this moment.

• 10:28Georgia Hardstark?

  I would go like wash my mouth with antibacterial soap. I was just thinking how gross children are, you know?

• 10:33Karen Kilgariff?

  Yes. And where, yeah, the cup could have been sitting next to their front porch, like gathering rain.

• 10:38Georgia Hardstark?

  Totally. It's a rainwater cup. Pour it out. Turn on the spigot outside with your lead pipes.

• 10:44Karen Kilgariff?

  Get the tadpoles out of there. Rinse it, serve it.

• 10:47Georgia Hardstark?

  That. The holidays are coming, which means we'll all be spending more time away from home.

• 10:53Karen Kilgariff?

  Whether you're visiting family or doing something actually fun, you want to know your home is protected while you're away.

• 10:58Georgia Hardstark?

  That's why now is a good time to think about home security with SimpliSafe.

• 11:02Karen Kilgariff?

  Unlike traditional security systems that alert you after a break in starts, SimpliSafe is designed to help stop intruders before they get inside. These days, you're worried about your house, you're out of town, and then something comes up and you get to look on your phone and SimpliSafe is going to show you not only the video of like, it's a raccoon at your front door, but also that they have staff that's sitting there, they already know. And if it was something different or worse, they would have already been on it.

• 11:28Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah, I really think that's invaluable peace of mind that just like relying on your neighbors, paying attention is not going to give you. We've partnered with SimpliSafe to offer our listeners their biggest savings of the year, 70% off your new system with professional monitoring when you visit simplisafe.com/mfm.

• 11:45Karen Kilgariff?

  That's simplisafe.com/mfm. And when you order, write in MFM at checkout and it tells them we sent you and it really helps the show.

• 11:53Georgia Hardstark?

  SimpliSafe, ahead of crime in real time.

• 11:55Karen Kilgariff?

  Goodbye. This podcast is brought to you by Squarespace. Turning something you love into a career is exciting. Then come the invoices. Lucky for you, Squarespace can handle the business stuff so you can focus on your business. From consultations to events and experiences, you can showcase your skills with a customizable website designed to attract clients and grow your business. With Squarespace's collection of cutting edge design tools, anyone can build a beautiful, professional, online presence that perfectly fits their brand or business. Get paid on time with professional invoices and online payments. Plus, streamline your workflow with built in appointment scheduling and email marketing tools. Head to Squarespace.com/murder for a free trial.

• 12:38Karen Kilgariff?

  And when you're ready to launch, use offer code MURDER to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Goodbye.

• 12:46Georgia Hardstark?

  Okay, I'm not gonna tell you the subject line. Hello, incredible people. In the 1970s, my grandma and grandpa were having a vacation and had just arrived at their hotel. Grandpa decided to go play at the casino while my grandma jumped in the shower after a full day of travel. After a few minutes, she heard pounding on the door, the door being forced open and men yelling, this is the FBI, come out with your hands up.

• 13:10Karen Kilgariff?

  Whoa.

• 13:10Georgia Hardstark?

  My grandmother, terrified, jumped out of the shower, covered herself with a robe and went out to her hotel bedroom to find five armed FBI agents. Apparently, my grandpa.

• 13:21Karen Kilgariff?

  She was dealing code.

• 13:23Georgia Hardstark?

  Maybe. Apparently, my grandma looks a lot like the kidnapped Patty Hearst, who had just robbed the bank in San Francisco and was wanted.

• 13:33Karen Kilgariff?

  Holy shit.

• 13:35Georgia Hardstark?

  Someone in the lobby of the hotel, some nosey fucking bitch, you know?

• 13:39Karen Kilgariff?

  You know who I saw? Patty Hearst.

• 13:40Georgia Hardstark?

  Sorry, I called your grandma a bitch, whoever it is. Someone in the lobby of the hotel called the police while grandma and grandpa had been checking in. As grandma is explaining everything, someone alerted my grandpa and he came up from the casino to help sort out the mess and describe, but no, my grandma was not Patty Hearst. After a bit, the FBI left. Turns out, throughout this entire mess, my grandma was more panicked about the two joints left on the dresser, all caps, in plain sight of the FBI agents. So this is what, the 70s or 80s?

• 14:12Karen Kilgariff?

  Yes.

• 14:13Georgia Hardstark?

  And there's joint, like that's, that is straight to jail.

• 14:16Karen Kilgariff?

  Yes.

• 14:16Georgia Hardstark?

  Right?

• 14:17Karen Kilgariff?

  Oh, yeah, yeah.

• 14:17Georgia Hardstark?

  Straight to jail.

• 14:19Karen Kilgariff?

  Straight to jail.

• 14:20Georgia Hardstark?

  She knew she couldn't hide them covertly, so she just had to wait to see if they would arrest her for the pot once they realized she had not robbed any banks. Thankfully, grandma and grandpa didn't get arrested and we still laugh about it to this day. Where'd you get pot back then?

• 14:35Karen Kilgariff?

  I mean, yeah, they either lived next to a pot farm or they actually were drug dealers and should have been arrested that day.

• 14:44Georgia Hardstark?

  Thank you for everything. I've been here since 2016 and you've gotten me through so many tough patches and beautiful moments. Thank you for all of your discussions on mental health. It was what inspired me to finally start medication and wow, this stuff works. You have a listener for life here. And remember, don't put anything on a dresser you don't want the FBI to see. Taylor, and then side by side of grandma and Patty Hearst. Are you ready?

• 15:11Karen Kilgariff?

  Yes.

• 15:11Georgia Hardstark?

  Okay, tell me if you think they look alike.

• 15:13Karen Kilgariff?

  Oh.

• 15:14Georgia Hardstark?

  See, not enough. That person was being so nosey. They do not look close enough.

• 15:19Karen Kilgariff?

  Well, here's the thing. This was like the monoculture where this was the only thing that happened that day.

• 15:25Georgia Hardstark?

  Totally.

• 15:25Karen Kilgariff?

  It wasn't like, oh, well, flip, flip, flip, and there's a bunch of other exciting stuff. It's like, this, the fact that that happened.

• 15:32Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah. All right, cool. Thank you for writing that in, Taylor. We love grandparents stories. We love like rebellious grandparents.

• 15:39Karen Kilgariff?

  Also, false identity, mistaken identity.

• 15:43Georgia Hardstark?

  FBI being involved.

• 15:45Karen Kilgariff?

  Grandparents mistaken identity with, and the FBI.

• 15:48Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah.

• 15:49Karen Kilgariff?

  So everything we love. Very similar to this subject line, tornado slash grandparents slash dog survival story.

• 15:57Georgia Hardstark?

  Oh.

• 15:58Karen Kilgariff?

  It says, hello all, I heard a call for tornado stories.

• 16:03Karen Kilgariff?

  As someone who was born and raised in Oklahoma, I could not resist sharing mine. Exactly who we want to hear from.

• 16:09Georgia Hardstark?

  Oklahoma, boom.

• 16:10Karen Kilgariff?

  On May 3rd, 1999, an F5 tornado devastated my hometown with wind speeds reaching 301 miles per hour. A total of 8,132 homes, 1,041 apartments, 260 businesses, 11 public buildings and seven churches were damaged or destroyed.

• 16:34Georgia Hardstark?

  That's an entire large town.

• 16:36Karen Kilgariff?

  It took out a town.

• 16:37Georgia Hardstark?

  Holy shit.

• 16:38Karen Kilgariff?

  And I think, I mean, F5, obviously, but it's like, that's what they do in a swath, in a strip of, I mean, it's just tornadoes, man.

• 16:48Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah.

• 16:48Karen Kilgariff?

  Okay, so, the tornado lasted for over an hour and tracked a 38 mile path through the state. Amongst the rubble was my grandparents' Jerry, pronounced Gary, sorry, Gary, pronounced Gary.

• 17:04Georgia Hardstark?

  That's like the Parks and Rec, two Parks and Recs.

• 17:07Karen Kilgariff?

  In one.

• 17:07Georgia Hardstark?

  Uh huh.

• 17:09Karen Kilgariff?

  So it was Gary and Kathy's home. So Gary spells it Jerry and pronounces it Gary.

• 17:15Georgia Hardstark?

  No, you're not, that's not allowed.

• 17:16Karen Kilgariff?

  I've never been angrier. They had been in downtown Oklahoma City at a minor league baseball game when the sirens rang out signaling that a tornado had touched down and they had to take cover. Upon returning home to the suburbs of Oklahoma City, they found their home destroyed. To be able to get in and out of their neighborhood after that, they had to prove their identity to the National Guard, who patrolled the streets armed with guns at all times. Amongst the shock and horror of seeing their entire home destroyed, they realized something horrifying. Their pup puppy Popeye, named this because she was missing an eye, had been at home and in the backyard when the tornado hit.

• 17:56Georgia Hardstark?

  Oh, no.

• 17:56Karen Kilgariff?

  Not only had they lost their home, but they lost their puppy, who was less than a year old at the time. The next day, while sorting through rubble, my Papa called out near what had been his backyard workshop. There, burrowed under the rubble, was little Popeye, scared but alive and well.

• 18:15Georgia Hardstark?

  Popeye, good boy.

• 18:17Karen Kilgariff?

  Just a little, it's a little girl.

• 18:18Georgia Hardstark?

  Girl, good girl.

• 18:20Karen Kilgariff?

  A little one eyed girl, it's only, it's just a baby. My grandparents have only been able to assume that she sensed what was coming and took cover. They had thought that they heard a whimper coming from the ruins of their backyard all day and they were right. Because my Papa documents everything with photos, I'm able to include pictures of Popeye in the spot where she had sheltered herself.

• 18:43Georgia Hardstark?

  No, I'm gonna cry.

• 18:44Karen Kilgariff?

  Yeah.

• 18:45Georgia Hardstark?

  Oh.

• 18:46Karen Kilgariff?

  That's where they found her.

• 18:48Georgia Hardstark?

  Girl.

• 18:49Karen Kilgariff?

  Just like, I don't know what's going on.

• 18:51Georgia Hardstark?

  I'm gonna, I'm gonna hide for a minute.

• 18:53Karen Kilgariff?

  Did that little dog fly up into the eye of that fucking storm? I mean, like.

• 18:58Georgia Hardstark?

  That's a baby.

• 18:59Karen Kilgariff?

  Just a little one. Popeye went on to live a full life in my grandparents' new home, fully equipped with a tornado shelter, passing away in 2011 at the age of 12.

• 19:09Georgia Hardstark?

  Wow.

• 19:09Karen Kilgariff?

  Despite her generally grumpy attitude, she was my fiercest protector. So sweet. And then it says, I've heard you mention about weather newscasters being a serious job and you ladies are so right. I'm now engaged to a newscast director at one of the major stations here in Oklahoma and he frequently pulls 12 to 13 hour shifts.

• 19:28Georgia Hardstark?

  Wow.

• 19:29Karen Kilgariff?

  I'm grateful for my fiance and his coworkers that work so hard to keep us safe. And before I go, I want to thank you ladies for showing me that loving true crime can be something you can make a career out of. When I began listening to this podcast, I was a community college student with absolutely no idea of what I wanted to do with my life. Because of you, I had the courage to pursue my master's degree in forensic psychology.

• 19:53Georgia Hardstark?

  Oh, my God.

• 19:55Karen Kilgariff?

  I earned it in May 2026. Masters, a masters.

• 19:59Georgia Hardstark?

  I'm speechless.

• 20:01Karen Kilgariff?

  Right? And I'm currently getting my doctorate in forensic sciences. Stay sexy, support your local news stations and take cover when you hear tornado sirens. Z.

• 20:11Georgia Hardstark?

  That is incredible.

• 20:13Karen Kilgariff?

  Oh, and here's another picture of her grandparents' home, the devastation.

• 20:18Georgia Hardstark?

  Wow, that is trashed.

• 20:19Karen Kilgariff?

  It's just like, have you ever seen the footage where it's just like, and then every once in a while, there'll just be one home untouched?

• 20:25Georgia Hardstark?

  Totally. It's so crazy that we've been on long enough that someone could not know what to do with their life, decide what to do with their life, do the thing.

• 20:34Karen Kilgariff?

  Do it.

• 20:35Georgia Hardstark?

  And then start working in the thing.

• 20:36Karen Kilgariff?

  Yeah, get a serious accreditation, what do they call it?

• 20:41Georgia Hardstark?

  Yes. Okay.

• 20:42Karen Kilgariff?

  It's yes, that.

• 20:45Georgia Hardstark?

  The holidays are coming, which means we'll all be spending more time away from home.

• 20:49Karen Kilgariff?

  Whether you're visiting family or doing something actually fun, you want to know your home is protected while you're away.

• 20:55Georgia Hardstark?

  That's why now is a good time to think about home security with SimpliSafe.

• 20:58Karen Kilgariff?

  Unlike traditional security systems that alert you after a break-in starts, SimpliSafe is designed to help stop intruders before they get inside. These days, you're worried about your house, you're out of town, and then something comes up and you get to look on your phone and SimpliSafe is going to show you not only the video of like, it's a raccoon at your front door, but also that they have staff that's sitting there, they already know. And if it was something different or worse, they would have already been on it.

• 21:24Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah, I really think that's invaluable peace of mind that just like relying on your neighbors, paying attention is not going to give you. We've partnered with SimpliSafe to offer our listeners their biggest savings of the year, 70% off your new system with professional monitoring when you visit simplisafe.com/mfm.

• 21:41Karen Kilgariff?

  That's simplisafe.com/mfm. And when you order, write in MFM at checkout and it tells them we sent you and it really helps the show.

• 21:49Georgia Hardstark?

  SimpliSafe, ahead of crime in real time.

• 21:52Karen Kilgariff?

  Goodbye. We've all had moments where dealing with healthcare or insurance feels completely overwhelming.

• 21:57Georgia Hardstark?

  You're sick, worried about someone you love, trying to understand what comes next, and suddenly you're spending hours on hold, filling out paperwork and trying to figure out who to call.

• 22:06Karen Kilgariff?

  Research shows patients spend the equivalent of an eight-hour workday every month coordinating their own care.

• 22:12Georgia Hardstark?

  Nobody hands you a roadmap when you're dealing with a diagnosis or ongoing health issues.

• 22:16Karen Kilgariff?

  That's why there's Solace Health.

• 22:18Georgia Hardstark?

  Solace provides personal healthcare advocates who average 16 years of healthcare experience and can help you get answers fast.

• 22:24Karen Kilgariff?

  Think of them as someone in your corner who understands the healthcare system and can handle the logistics while you focus on your health.

• 22:30Georgia Hardstark?

  They can help with appointments, insurance denials, medical bills, treatment options, and understanding doctor recommendations.

• 22:36Karen Kilgariff?

  Research shows 92% of patients report a positive impact on their care from working with an advocate.

• 22:42Georgia Hardstark?

  Advocacy improves outcomes and Solace advocates are covered by insurance nationwide.

• 22:46Karen Kilgariff?

  Eligibility varies by insurance plan.

• 22:48Georgia Hardstark?

  Advocates do not provide medical or legal advice or services, must be 18 years or older.

• 22:53Karen Kilgariff?

  Go to solacehealth.com/murder to see if you qualify.

• 22:56Georgia Hardstark?

  It takes about two minutes and it's covered by insurance.

• 22:59Karen Kilgariff?

  That's S-O-L-A-C-E health.com/murder. Goodbye.

• 23:05Georgia Hardstark?

  Teacher drug dog confession story is my last one.

• 23:08Karen Kilgariff?

  Nice.

• 23:08Georgia Hardstark?

  Hi Karen and Georgia, you didn't ask for this, but what the hell, here goes. In my first month of being a public high school math teacher, the drug dogs came around campus, standard procedure, and a student immediately raised his hand and told me that he had a little pot and asked if he could just give it to me now instead of waiting for the dogs to come by. I started absolutely panicking, like, all caps, oh my God, why would you tell me that? And he starts begging me to take the pot from him and I'm sweating, telling him and the whole class that I'm going to have no choice but to call the front desk and have them bring the dogs straight to our classroom. Now he's like reaching into his bag while I'm screaming, do not touch anything. And

• 23:49Georgia Hardstark?

  I'm freaking out and walking towards the classroom phone and he walks towards me and turns open his palm and inside his hand is the tiniest little terracotta pot I have ever seen in my entire life, like so small, it was basically a thimble, quote, a little pot, no idea why they even make terracotta pots that small for me, I fucking love them. Or why he had this in his backpack, but it was an all-time prank.

• 24:18Karen Kilgariff?

  The kid was in on his own joke.

• 24:20Georgia Hardstark?

  It was his joke. It was his joke. I have a little pot. Can you, can you hold on to my little pot for me?

• 24:26Karen Kilgariff?

  It's a joke or is it a narc test?

• 24:28Georgia Hardstark?

  Right. Now he knows.

• 24:30Karen Kilgariff?

  We know you got up to walk toward that phone.

• 24:31Georgia Hardstark?

  That's right. Never trust you. Stay sexy and always keep a little pot in your bag. See.

• 24:38Karen Kilgariff?

  That's ridiculous. Like, do not give me that pot.

• 24:42Georgia Hardstark?

  Do not give me, I'm telling on you. Yeah, total narc.

• 24:45Karen Kilgariff?

  I mean, I literally was like, could they open the window and put the backpack outside? I'm like, wouldn't you help?

• 24:50Georgia Hardstark?

  She wouldn't. I mean, she, she could get fired and probably arrested for that.

• 24:57Karen Kilgariff?

  Well, that or a teen, teen going to jail.

• 25:00Georgia Hardstark?

  True.

• 25:01Karen Kilgariff?

  Okay. This is going to be a nice round us out.

• 25:04Georgia Hardstark?

  Right.

• 25:05Karen Kilgariff?

  Cause we've really talked about everything today.

• 25:06Georgia Hardstark?

  Surely.

• 25:08Karen Kilgariff?

  So the subject line of this email is my boyfriend won a baby modeling contest.

• 25:14Georgia Hardstark?

  Okay. Baby model.

• 25:18Karen Kilgariff?

  What is this?

• 25:20Georgia Hardstark?

  I'm just imagining a mom like holding him up, turning him this side, like a cat show when they hold the cat and they're like.

• 25:28Karen Kilgariff?

  Yep. And they're like, here's the stretch, here's the tail.

• 25:30Georgia Hardstark?

  Open the mouth of the baby, check out the tail.

• 25:33Karen Kilgariff?

  When you show a sheep, you have to, you have to hold their jowls down and stick your knee into their chest.

• 25:38Georgia Hardstark?

  Same with the baby.

• 25:39Karen Kilgariff?

  Right? So that the baby bloats out.

• 25:42Georgia Hardstark?

  I didn't want to know that.

• 25:43Karen Kilgariff?

  Hello, MFM crew. Too bad. That's how I lived from age eight. Hello, MFM crew. Listening to your most recent mini-soad, you asked for baby mall contest stories.

• 25:55Georgia Hardstark?

  Who are we?

• 25:56Karen Kilgariff?

  Just total lunatics. And I have a strange one. My boyfriend told me on our first date. Oh, I love that. And I'm, and I make him tell it at all dinner parties, slash family gatherings, slash two random people we meet. My boyfriend Gus had two truths and a lie on his Hinge profile that led to a very interesting conversation on our first date. When he was a baby, his family was living in Malaysia for his dad's job. His mother entered him into the highly competitive baby racing contest that plagued the early 2000s malls, not only in the United States, but also in Malaysia. Do you remember the baby races?

• 26:34Georgia Hardstark?

  When they, it's like a, like a dog, like a dachshund race where they just like.

• 26:38Karen Kilgariff?

  Yep. They kind of put out little lanes.

• 26:40Georgia Hardstark?

  Kind of love them.

• 26:41Karen Kilgariff?

  I know, right?

• 26:42Georgia Hardstark?

  I'm, I'm fine with those.

• 26:43Karen Kilgariff?

  Cause some babies just hang out.

• 26:45Georgia Hardstark?

  Totally.

• 26:45Karen Kilgariff?

  And the screaming makes them stop or go faster.

• 26:47Georgia Hardstark?

  It's always funny.

• 26:49Karen Kilgariff?

  It's very random. It is on par, parallel to chicken ship bingo.

• 26:55Georgia Hardstark?

  Totally chicken ship bingo.

• 26:58Karen Kilgariff?

  So, baby Gus dominated the competition and won the crawling race and unbeknownst to him, caught the attention of a baby modeling agent who approached his mom with an offer for a cover modeling shoot for a popular baby magazine. His mother accepted the offer and has gifted me 23 years later, the most hilarious photos, in parentheses, and blackmail of my boyfriend. I've attached them to this email and I would love to point out the headlines of toxoplasmosis and failure to thrive surrounding his face.

• 27:32Georgia Hardstark?

  Oh my God.

• 27:33Karen Kilgariff?

  Just making a bizarre situation even more hilarious. The idea of this happening in 2026 and our different generational perspectives on privacy for children online makes an agent scouting out babies at the mall seem just a little creepy. If one day we do have children, I know I will not be continuing the baby modeling legacy, but it's nice to know the cute baby genes are strong. I'm incredibly lucky to have met such a sweet, interesting and caring guy. I'm sending this two years after that first date where we could not stop talking for hours until we were asked to leave the restaurant at closing.

• 28:08Georgia Hardstark?

  Aww.

• 28:09Karen Kilgariff?

  So cute. My boyfriend has many other interesting life stories and I'm lucky to have him in my life and he has listened to, okay, easy. Just because he's such a good-looking baby doesn't mean you need to brag about him all day long. What if she's, she's dating just a really handsome baby?

• 28:26Georgia Hardstark?

  Baby model.

• 28:27Karen Kilgariff?

  This baby model.

• 28:28Georgia Hardstark?

  My boyfriend, the baby model.

• 28:29Karen Kilgariff?

  The baby model's got a red Corvette and he's real, he's got a lot of.

• 28:33Georgia Hardstark?

  He wins races.

• 28:34Karen Kilgariff?

  He's got charisma.

• 28:35Georgia Hardstark?

  He's on modeling covers and.

• 28:37Karen Kilgariff?

  He wears a blazer and a shirt with no tie.

• 28:40Georgia Hardstark?

  Ascot.

• 28:42Karen Kilgariff?

  Okay. Grateful for him, blah, blah, blah. He's listened to many MFM episodes as I've been falling asleep to your podcast for years now. You don't wear headphones. How could you do that?

• 28:52Georgia Hardstark?

  Oh my God.

• 28:53Karen Kilgariff?

  At night?

• 28:54Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah. Good night, sweetie.

• 28:57Karen Kilgariff?

  In the background. He's never seen that as a red flag. Well, that's nice.

• 29:00Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah.

• 29:01Karen Kilgariff?

  I love you ladies so much. You've been in my ears from my freshman year of high school during geometry class to my commute as I work as a board certified music therapist.

• 29:12Georgia Hardstark?

  Shit, she did it. The timeline.

• 29:14Karen Kilgariff?

  She did it. And then she says, stay sexy and stay away from baby modeling agents. Bailey, she, her, are you ready for this baby modeling picture?

• 29:22Georgia Hardstark?

  Let's see.

• 29:23Karen Kilgariff?

  Of a lifetime.

• 29:27Georgia Hardstark?

  Wow, that's a serious looking baby.

• 29:29Karen Kilgariff?

  That baby is, went from this, straight to public library shoots.

• 29:34Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah. It says the failure to thrive right next to his face.

• 29:39Karen Kilgariff?

  He's like, fuck you bitch, I'm thriving. I'm thriving.

• 29:43Georgia Hardstark?

  Right. From bailing to thriving.

• 29:45Karen Kilgariff?

  Who's paying for these overalls? I am bitch. I'm a baby model. That's how we do it.

• 29:50Georgia Hardstark?

  Oh my God. Bailey, amazing job. Thank you for writing that and, and becoming a,

• 29:57Karen Kilgariff?

  becoming Mrs. Baby Model. One day, fingers crossed.

• 30:02Georgia Hardstark?

  Like your whole wedding has to be themed on baby models. It's just that on every table.

• 30:06Karen Kilgariff?

  Pictures on the top of the cake.

• 30:07Georgia Hardstark?

  Yes. The invitations.

• 30:11Karen Kilgariff?

  Yeah. Only other baby models are invited.

• 30:14Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah, which have you got? I'm at table baby model three.

• 30:17Karen Kilgariff?

  I'm the one with all those, the high chairs. So much crying, but it's fun.

• 30:22Georgia Hardstark?

  And he wears overalls.

• 30:26Georgia Hardstark?

  They both wear overalls.

• 30:27Karen Kilgariff?

  Overall tuxedo, overall wedding dress.

• 30:30Georgia Hardstark?

  That's right. We love you overall. Send us your emails at myfavoritemurder@gmail.

• 30:35Karen Kilgariff?

  Here's, here's what I was going to do. Well, that was a great show overall.

• 30:39Georgia Hardstark?

  That was good.

• 30:39Karen Kilgariff?

  Woo, stay sexy.

• 30:41Georgia Hardstark?

  And don't get murdered.

• 30:42Karen Kilgariff?

  Goodbye. Elvis, do you want a cookie?

• 30:53Karen Kilgariff?

  This has been an Exactly Right Production.

• 30:55Georgia Hardstark?

  Our managing producer is Molly Smith.

• 30:57Karen Kilgariff?

  Our consulting producer is Kate Schellbach.

• 30:59Georgia Hardstark?

  Our creative lead is Allison Agosti.

• 31:01Karen Kilgariff?

  Our associate producer is Tessa Hughes and our editor is Aristotle Acevedo.

• 31:05Georgia Hardstark?

  This episode was mixed by Leona Scolacci.

• 31:08Karen Kilgariff?

  Email your hometowns to [email protected] and follow the show on Instagram at MyFavoriteMurder.

• 31:14Georgia Hardstark?

  Listen to My Favorite Murder on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

• 31:19Karen Kilgariff?

  Or watch new episodes every week on Netflix. Search for My Favorite Murder, add us to your list and hit the double thumbs up button.

• 31:27Georgia Hardstark?

  Goodbye.

• 31:33Karen Kilgariff?

  Vacation planning should feel like a breeze, not a deep dive into countless travel sites searching for the best deal.

• 31:39Georgia Hardstark?

  With CheapCaribbean's Budget Beach Finder, you can search every destination and every date all in one search.

• 31:44Karen Kilgariff?

  You'll save time and money with the Budget Beach Finder.

• 31:47Georgia Hardstark?

  Say goodbye to endless scrolling and tab hopping and hello to Budget Beach Bliss at your fingertips.

• 31:52Karen Kilgariff?

  Go to cheapcaribbean.com to try out the Budget Beach Finder and see just how stress-free vacation planning should be.

• 31:58Georgia Hardstark?

  Goodbye. You know a favorite M-word? Magnesium.

• 32:02Karen Kilgariff?

  Like the kind that's in Dr. Teal's magnesium spray.

• 32:05Georgia Hardstark?

  Made from a proprietary blend of topical minerals, it's designed to relax and prepare you for a night of rest.

• 32:11Karen Kilgariff?

  If you need a reset after your day, make Dr. Teal's magnesium spray part of your nighttime routine.

• 32:16Georgia Hardstark?

  Generously spritz each foot before bed and you'll be all set. I've actually started doing this and I'm obsessed with magnesium. It does everything.

• 32:23Karen Kilgariff?

  Something like this is just like, it's simple, it's easy, and it actually works.

• 32:26Georgia Hardstark?

  Totally. For wellness you can feel, find Dr. Teal's magnesium spray online or in your local bath aisle.

• 32:31Karen Kilgariff?

  Goodbye.

• 32:33Speaker 02

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