Pod Insights My Brother, My Brother And Me MBMBaM 770: Hy-paw-thesis About this episode We’ve gotten chosen to participate in some extreme versions of children’s playground games. But not the stuff you’re used to, like licking wafers. We’re talking games like zoo jogging, wing sauce mixology, and sneaking into Baskin Robbins after dark.
Suggested talking points: Squid Game Den Mom, Deadly Cornhole, Five Nights at Louvries, Sydney Sweeney Todd, Gesticulatory Excitement
Immigrant Defenders Law Center: https://www.immdef.org/
Transcript 11,176 words · 8 speakers
Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.
0:00 Speaker 00 The McElroy brothers are not experts and their advice should never be followed. Travis insists he's a sexpert, but if there's a degree on his wall, I haven't seen it. Also, this show isn't for kids, which I mention only so the babies out there will know how cool they are for listening. What's up, you cool baby?
1:10 Travis McElroy? Hey, everybody. Welcome. My brother, my brother, me and advice show for the modern era. I'm the oldest brother around these parts. Justin McElroy. What up, Trav Nation? It's being your middlest brother Travis McElroy.
1:19 Griffin McElroy? What's up? It's Griffin. Great fucking news, guys. Guess what, dudes? I got great news. Things are about to turn around. Things are gonna turn around for three of us in a big nature. What?
1:30 Travis McElroy? Oh, I've been waiting for him to turn around.
1:33 Griffin McElroy? I got my letter yesterday in the mail. I got picked for the next Squid Game.
1:39 Travis McElroy? Oh, Griffin.
1:42 Griffin McElroy? They got, they're gonna get, I'm gonna be in the, I'm gonna do the next Squid Game.
1:45 Travis McElroy? I will say, um, I only know a little bit about the franchise. I didn't know that they communicated via the US Postal Service.
1:55 Griffin McElroy? Yeah, I was surprised too. I think that's how they do it in the sort of North American branch.
2:02 Travis McElroy? Oh, okay.
2:03 Griffin McElroy? No one's really checking that shit anyway.
2:05 Travis McElroy? Oh. I just don't like when they adapt it, you know what I mean? The American Squid Game is gonna be so weird comparatively.
2:13 Griffin McElroy? Yeah, for sure, for sure, for sure. The games I will be a little bit more familiar with probably. These deadly backyard games.
2:20 Travis McElroy? Right. Like Deadly Cornhole and stuff like that?
2:23 Griffin McElroy? Deadly Cornhole, I have heard they did that last Squid Game, so I doubt they're gonna bring it back for another one. But it was like Cornhole, but the Cornhole board had a big landmine in it.
2:33 Travis McElroy? Oh, man.
2:34 Griffin McElroy? So if you hit it, it blew up the other team and they died.
2:37 Travis McElroy? Maybe regular lawn darts?
2:39 Griffin McElroy? Regular, it's just called fast lawn darts. That was, again, that was last season they got you with that, so probably no repeats there.
2:46 Travis McElroy? I'm gonna be working this season Griffin as a den mom.
2:50 Griffin McElroy? On Squid Game?
2:51 Travis McElroy? In the Squid Game this year. I'm gonna be, they'll probably put me in a different region, but.
2:55 Griffin McElroy? What's that mean? What do you do?
2:57 Travis McElroy? Basically, I'm the guy who, after the Squid Game, if you die, I get your stuff and I put it in a trash bag and toss it down a trash chute. And if you don't die, I give you a juice box and a banana flavored Little Debbie.
3:11 Griffin McElroy? Oh, cool. A banana flavored Little Debbie.
3:14 Travis McElroy? Banana cake Little Debbie is the only one we got in stock. They're so good, yeah. You get, it's like a moon pie, but worse. Well, I'll see if I can work on that, Justin. I got hired to do craft services.
3:24 Griffin McElroy? That's cool. For, sorry, I need to be very clear that I am not talking. Okay, good. I didn't, I guess they do feed them. You do gotta feed them, I guess?
3:33 Travis McElroy? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hi, can I tell you, I'm freaking out though, because I kinda committed to catering for like 600 people. I told them I could do it, and they said, you have like a company and stuff, and I said, yeah, I don't.
3:45 Griffin McElroy? See, that's funny you said that, because my letter said, bring your food from home. They said, bring a bag lunch. And I said, won't I be there for six days? And they were like, yeah, but you're not gonna be around for six. Let's be honest, man. You're not gonna be able to hang. Just the one bag lunch will get you there.
4:00 Travis McElroy? They do the first game, first thing on the first day, and then you end up with twice as many lunches as there are people. And then you just keep halving it and go on.
4:11 Griffin McElroy? Then it filters down. You're right, Trav. Yeah.
4:13 Travis McElroy? Griffin, you just have to hope that there will be an understanding amongst all the participants that you will be killed later at some point. And it is not an urgent thing that you have to be killed immediately.
4:23 Griffin McElroy? Keep me around as a special little snack. You know what I mean?
4:26 Travis McElroy? Like something, yeah. It's always nice to know when you're in a squigging scenario, and God knows the three of us have been there too many times. It's nice to have.
4:33 Griffin McElroy? I've never been in a Squid game. This is my first Squid game. Yeah. Have you been in a Squid game?
4:37 Travis McElroy? Oh, a couple, yeah.
4:38 Griffin McElroy? Shit, man. Wait, how come you don't have like a billion, billion dollars?
4:42 Travis McElroy? I gave it away. That's in Juan. Yeah.
4:45 Griffin McElroy? Okay.
4:46 Travis McElroy? I gave it, I gave it to Juan. My friend Juan, he has it. It's in Juan's pocket. Travis gave it to Juan. It was all in crypto, which was the mistake I made.
4:56 Griffin McElroy? You just gave your friend Juan a flash drive.
4:58 Travis McElroy? Yeah, but it's important that you pick somebody where you're like, I don't like them. Nobody does. And so when we get to the inevitable scenario where they're like, you have to kill somebody to move on to the next one. We've kept him around for that.
5:12 Griffin McElroy? I'm not gonna, I don't wanna do that. If the games are like, you gotta kill someone, I'll be like, mm, pass. Cause they let you pass one game. If there's a game they say like, today.
5:20 Travis McElroy? Man, I wish I'd known that, man.
5:22 Griffin McElroy? That today, they're like, today we're playing um, four square, but instead of the ball, we're gonna use um, a gun. And you bounce the gun on the ground, and then you have to use it and hurt someone. I would say, pass.
5:33 Travis McElroy? Can I tell you the worst part about being on a Squid game, Griffin? And you have this to dread, the wafers. Oh my God, you gotta sign so many wafers.
5:41 Griffin McElroy? Yeah.
5:42 Travis McElroy? Those little cookie things? No, that's great. That's why they brought me in to do craft services, because I know the recipe for the wafers. I got, I, you know what, guys? Kidding aside, those little wafers, the, the, where you gotta etch those out with a needle.
5:57 Griffin McElroy? Yeah.
5:57 Travis McElroy? They're, they're the same, they're sea foam candy, basically. Wait, do I have to make those? Well, they're one of my favorite candies and my problem is I'm such a little stinker.
6:08 Griffin McElroy? Oh, for sure.
6:08 Travis McElroy? That I'd get in there and start trying to get out my umbrella or my diamond or whatever. And I think, mm hmm.
6:14 Griffin McElroy? Mm hmm.
6:14 Travis McElroy? You know, like I'd get hungry. I'd start with the scraps.
6:17 Griffin McElroy? Yeah.
6:17 Travis McElroy? I'd break off parts and be like, mm hmm.
6:20 Griffin McElroy? In the Squid Game they did for Netflix.
6:22 Travis McElroy? Yeah.
6:23 Griffin McElroy? Where they filmed one of them.
6:24 Travis McElroy? Yeah.
6:24 Griffin McElroy? That was great. Put it on Netflix.
6:25 Travis McElroy? Bold, a bold choice. Um, they got exactly the right lesson from putting that on their network.
6:30 Griffin McElroy? The guy, absolutely. Mr. Beast at least took, had a great takeaway from that series. The guy who solved it, the hero, licks the back of it to weaken the structure of it so he can carve it out. But the, I'm, I'm thinking, yeah, right, Buster. You just want, you wanted to lick some of that foam. I can tell.
6:47 Travis McElroy? So sorry, when you said the Squid Games they filmed for Netflix.
6:50 Griffin McElroy? Yes.
6:50 Travis McElroy? You meant?
6:51 Griffin McElroy? Of the many Squid Game they do.
6:53 Travis McElroy? Yeah. The Squid Game, not the Squid Games.
6:56 Griffin McElroy? They recorded one of them a few years back and they put it up on Netflix, called it Squid Games.
7:01 Travis McElroy? Sorry.
7:02 Griffin McElroy? Okay, but wait, but wait.
7:02 Travis McElroy? You guys been saying Squid Games? Cause I thought you were saying like Disney's Kid Games where you went and you competed. Yeah, I was doing like Wild and Crazy Kids. Quit. And I was. Squid Games that they filmed was the ones that they did with actual people for real stakes. That's what I thought you meant because they actually did the Squid Games with real people.
7:22 Griffin McElroy? Yes, they did a weird knockoff where I guess the, where the real world guys were like, and now we're doing Squid Game. And it's like, they're already doing Squid Game, dude. You don't need to also do Squid Game. They just recorded a Squid Game.
7:34 Travis McElroy? Yeah. Do you like your chances?
7:37 Griffin McElroy? No, absolutely not. Law of large numbers. There's like 500 of these fucking guys that I'm going up against. I do not like my chances. The only game I was ever good at, at the schoolyard was Foursquare. I don't mean to brag, but I. That's not, that doesn't really count.
7:54 Travis McElroy? The only thing I ever did was Cookie Crunching and that's hard for me because I feel like my one skill's not gonna be that good. Cause I always see that wafer and I'll think, I'm, I'm.
8:02 Griffin McElroy? Yeah, for sure.
8:03 Travis McElroy? Delicious. I don't think, I'm, I'm, let's talk, I don't wanna.
8:08 Griffin McElroy? You don't wanna, I don't wanna do Squid Game.
8:09 Travis McElroy? I'm second guessing the shirt. That's what I.
8:12 Griffin McElroy? Oh, man, no, the shirt beats that shirt.
8:14 Travis McElroy? I, I don't know, man. I feel like I look like Beetlejuice got a wish and became a real boy. I don't.
8:19 Griffin McElroy? No! You look like Beetlejuice coming out of the jungle mists.
8:25 Travis McElroy? I don't think I didn't get. Like Beetlejuice on safari? I didn't get Beetlejuice at all. I got like a cool character that everybody likes on White Lotus.
8:33 Griffin McElroy? Yeah.
8:34 Travis McElroy? Like I was pushing myself too far.
8:36 Griffin McElroy? No, man.
8:36 Travis McElroy? You know, Goggins would wear that. I don't know the show, but Goggins would wear that. But you know the feeling, I don't want to talk about the shirt specifically. I want to talk about the feeling of when you put on a garment where you know you're pushing it a little bit. I've never felt that, Justin. You are lying about who you are and you're hoping everyone else just kind of goes with it and doesn't point out that.
8:55 Griffin McElroy? Yeah.
8:56 Travis McElroy? No, I don't think so.
8:58 Griffin McElroy? No.
8:58 Travis McElroy? Big shot McElroy. What's that feel like?
9:00 Griffin McElroy? I think it's okay to step into that. We all wear masks.
9:04 Travis McElroy? Oh. Jim Carrey said that. I have a Japanese style, I have a Japanese style, uh, like jacket that was, that was advertised to me on Facebook. It's like a tasteful, elegant jacket that ties at the front.
9:20 Griffin McElroy? Okay.
9:20 Travis McElroy? With a tasteful tie and. Are you just bragging or? No, it's been hanging in my closet for several months.
9:26 Griffin McElroy? Like a, a yukata for boys?
9:29 Travis McElroy? Perhaps. Every time that I take it down, I think perhaps this is the elegant occasion where I'm gonna, where I'm gonna wear this garment.
9:36 Griffin McElroy? I must, I must protest.
9:40 Griffin McElroy? I simply must, I must stand on, stand on business right now, Justin, and tell you, I don't think so.
9:46 Travis McElroy? I disagree. Listen, Griffin, we are in, as you could tell from my lack of ever wearing it, a hundred percent agree.
9:53 Griffin McElroy? Full agreement.
9:54 Travis McElroy? Full agreement, yeah. Well, Justin, I disagree with Griffin here. It's the first time it's ever happened, but I'm gonna say, when you put on a garment, you must ask yourself, who is wearing who? And I think that if you put that, that elegant jacket on and you second guess yourself, that jacket's wearing you, my man. And that's not the case. You gotta put that jacket on and, and make that jacket your own and know that you're wearing it.
10:18 Griffin McElroy? Jackets are like, damn, that, you're looking good, other jacket, what is that? And they're like, it's a Justin. He's so fly.
10:24 Travis McElroy? I'm saying though, that by wearing, the wearing of this, uh, frock would, I know that I would have to believe it to pull it off.
10:30 Griffin McElroy? Yes.
10:31 Travis McElroy? And that belief would represent such an incredible act of. Hubris on my part. That's what they don't tell you about the emperor's new clothes is that there's a version of that where everybody's like, listen, I know he's not wearing any clothes, but that man's confident as hell. Look at that dude.
10:46 Griffin McElroy? Hanging brain out in the public yard.
10:48 Travis McElroy? And I think we're supposed to mock him in that story, but here's a dude who looks at himself naked and says, I look so good that even though, listen, I'm in on it too. I know I'm naked, but damn, look at this.
11:02 Griffin McElroy? There's an alternate ending of that story where that kingdom becomes a naked kingdom. And everyone's like, damn, he's so brave and bold. What are we doing with these things? Why are we ashamed of these forms that God gave us is a religious story in my version of it.
11:15 Travis McElroy? And then, I'm sorry, go ahead.
11:16 Griffin McElroy? And then everyone would be naked. Go ahead. I'm done now.
11:18 Travis McElroy? Beautiful. Give me 30 seconds.
11:20 Griffin McElroy? Oh.
11:21 Travis McElroy? Last chance to get your bets in on whether you think I pull it off. I'll come back in.
11:25 Griffin McElroy? Are you gonna change?
11:26 Travis McElroy? I know exactly where it is.
11:28 Griffin McElroy? The jacket?
11:29 Travis McElroy? Seconds. Yeah. I'm gonna put it on and then we'll get an official vote. Okay, Griffin and I will talk about it.
11:34 Griffin McElroy? Okay.
11:35 Travis McElroy? No matter what, we should give it 10 out of 10.
11:38 Griffin McElroy? Well, hmm, it's gonna depend entirely on the length for me.
11:43 Travis McElroy? Oh, really? What length works for you?
11:46 Griffin McElroy? If it's a jacket with a cinch, we could, there's interpretations of that that I think work for Justin. If it is knee length, all of a sudden, um, I don't think you.
12:00 Travis McElroy? If it's a mid thigh, I think I would enjoy it.
12:03 Griffin McElroy? Mid thigh is even approaching, is approaching the danger zone for me, if I'm being honest.
12:09 Travis McElroy? Well, there's a shortness too that wouldn't work.
12:11 Griffin McElroy? Well, yeah, man. Well, I don't know, cause I kinda like a fucking like cyberpunk crop top jacket. I think Justin could pull one of those off really fucking good.
12:18 Travis McElroy? Well, but then why would it have a cinch? Why would it have a tie if it's a crop top?
12:23 Griffin McElroy? You don't need a cinch for a crop top. Yeah, no, I mean, that would be like so.
12:25 Travis McElroy? Defeating the purpose, one might argue.
12:27 Griffin McElroy? Just go around your armpits. I don't know where the cinch would even go at that point.
12:30 Travis McElroy? Yeah. All right, here we go.
12:33 Griffin McElroy? All right, let's see it. Maximize your window for the full effect.
12:36 Travis McElroy? Yeah. Good call. Oh, I like the color.
12:44 Griffin McElroy? What material is this?
12:46 Travis McElroy? Huh?
12:46 Griffin McElroy? What material is this that we're talking about?
12:48 Travis McElroy? I have, uh, I don't know, let's see some of the details.
12:54 Griffin McElroy? That's the washing.
12:55 Travis McElroy? It's a hundred percent technical polyester. Oh, technical polyester. So you could do like work in it. So, so I roll up to the function.
13:05 Griffin McElroy? Yeah.
13:05 Travis McElroy? Okay.
13:06 Griffin McElroy? Bind it, cinch it.
13:08 Travis McElroy? This is, I mean.
13:09 Griffin McElroy? This is not what I was expecting. I was expecting more of a, more of a yukata. This is just like a.
13:14 Travis McElroy? I'm saying if you had a clean, clean crisp white shirt.
13:19 Griffin McElroy? Yeah.
13:20 Travis McElroy? Maybe an ass. If I had, like me, Justin Tyler McElroy, like I'm the person who's doing this. Okay.
13:27 Griffin McElroy? I tell you, man, I'll tell you what it's giving me. And you can take this how you want it and sort of measure yourself against it if that is how you choose. This is giving me Ethan Hunt on the lam in Jakarta or something like fucking running along rooftops. Like it's giving you kind of action jacket.
13:44 Travis McElroy? You're saying if I make a hole with a gun perpendicular to me, who I am on the planet, the absolute opposite.
13:52 Griffin McElroy? Yeah.
13:53 Travis McElroy? A hundred percent.
13:53 Griffin McElroy? Through the mantle.
13:54 Travis McElroy? I think it's the mantle core of the earth pops out the hundred percent opposite furthest I could be from how I should be dressed. Like the biggest possible miss is what you're saying. Here's what I'll say. The fit is great.
14:07 Griffin McElroy? The fit is right.
14:09 Travis McElroy? And I think if you rolled up to like a backyard barbecue.
14:14 Griffin McElroy? The tummy bolo I could honestly do without.
14:19 Travis McElroy? But I'm saying the T-shirt underneath makes it look like not right. But if you had. Shirt underneath is because the Beetlejuice shirt would look absolutely wild. Um, cool sunglasses. You were out at a summer barbecue.
14:34 Griffin McElroy? What are those?
14:34 Travis McElroy? Or a patio party. I was taking off my sunglasses.
14:37 Griffin McElroy? Those are so small, man. Your fingers were so little. Why?
14:40 Travis McElroy? If you had some Morpheus, some cool Morpheus glasses.
14:44 Griffin McElroy? Oh, yeah, dude, some, dude, some Morpheus half moon glasses. This should be a new segment on the show, fit check. Some Morpheus half moon glasses, sunglasses with that untied, very, very, uh, short yukata, I think is a strong fucking look. Those are not, I'm gonna be half moon.
15:04 Travis McElroy? You think these gunners with it? Is this selling it?
15:06 Griffin McElroy? No, I don't think it, the gamer glasses actually fully ruins it. Fully, fully ruins it, man.
15:12 Travis McElroy? All right. Well, thank you guys for indulging me.
15:14 Griffin McElroy? Yeah, sure. Of course.
15:15 Travis McElroy? I think I think you could pull it off.
15:18 Travis McElroy? Well, we just demonstrated the opposite. So your hypothetical. Is that what you took away from that? The problem is the shorts.
15:23 Griffin McElroy? You when you.
15:24 Travis McElroy? The shorts were. Elegant slacks with it.
15:26 Griffin McElroy? If I saw the car, I saw the cargo pockets peeking up over those, over that jacket.
15:30 Travis McElroy? That's the problem.
15:31 Griffin McElroy? Yeah.
15:32 Travis McElroy? I'm just saying, when you rolled up in that jacket, it was not a no for me, that there was potential there. I think you could do it.
15:39 Travis McElroy? There will come a day, don't get rid of it, is what I'm saying. There will come a day where you wake up. Yeah, it would, what I do with my clothes is I donate them to Harmony House. And I feel like that jacket would land even worse there than it is in my home, honestly. If that's even less appropriate there, I don't know.
15:55 Griffin McElroy? Some confusion. Yeah.
15:56 Travis McElroy? There would be some mild, yeah, there's a, yeah.
16:01 Travis McElroy? Here's our first question. I work at the zoo as a lion scientist. Lion scientist.
16:06 Griffin McElroy? Fucking hell, man. Cool. You learn about so many cool fucking jobs through this show, don't you guys?
16:12 Travis McElroy? I'm glad that I, it does sound like a lion who's a scientist. That would be a scientist lion, I guess.
16:18 Griffin McElroy? It does sound like a lion who's a scientist, but I love that there's enough.
16:21 Travis McElroy? Can I say so far, you don't know if that's true, because if a lion was a scientist, they would be able to write an email to a podcast. I guess that's true. I assumed they would be doing lion-based science, which I think shows a lot of ignorance on my end. Yeah, but they work at the zoo because it's a fucking lion, man. You'd be running around in public. Oh, maybe they work at the zoo like a writer might write at a coffee shop. Right? Where it's just like, I don't work at the coffee shop. I do my work at the coffee shop. They're being polite. They live in a zoo. It's a, it's a lion. You know what I mean? Like, they're being tasteful about it.
16:56 Griffin McElroy? Would a lion doing lion experiments have like hypotheses like, what happened? I eat too.
17:03 Travis McElroy? Hypotheses?
17:04 Griffin McElroy? Thank you. What happened? I eat too? Pig tummy hurt? Like?
17:06 Travis McElroy? Yeah.
17:08 Griffin McElroy? Drink from, drink, I'll, I drink, uh, yucky water, tummy hurt. Like a lot of just sort of like figuring out if tummy hurt when.
17:16 Travis McElroy? Where, where does Gazelle go after eat?
17:19 Griffin McElroy? Yeah. Where does Gazelle go after eat? My hypothesis, sharks.
17:24 Travis McElroy? What is red watering?
17:27 Travis McElroy? Why delicious? Why delicious?
17:29 Griffin McElroy? The question I, the lion scientist, have to ask is how come the circle of life features so much poop? Has so much defecate? Circle of life is more of a sine wave of life where it's like, oh, a thing is alive. And then something eats it and turns it into poop. And then that goes right back to grass. It just kind of grass guy, grass guy, you know?
17:47 Travis McElroy? Yeah. I'm just saying that if I was a lionist and I'm at the zoo, I would have so many chances to see people cooking and eating food that they would look at like the raw shit they're eating and go, huh?
18:00 Griffin McElroy? A lot of cooking happening at the zoo that I'm not aware of?
18:04 Travis McElroy? Yeah, man. People gotta eat. People gotta eat.
18:07 Griffin McElroy? But from the lion exhibit?
18:09 Travis McElroy? That's the whole appeal of the aquarium.
18:11 Griffin McElroy? Is you get to see people cooking?
18:13 Travis McElroy? No, it's just you go to the aquarium and you go, man, I want to eat the fish. Eat that.
18:17 Griffin McElroy? Hey, I would love to keep reading this question.
18:19 Travis McElroy? Oh, yeah, right. This one. Oh, yeah. Make it past the first sentence if you insist. This comes with unlimited free zoo access during opening hours. Additionally, my girlfriend and I love jogging together. The city I live in does not have many good parks for jogging, but the zoo has a lot of open green spaces and pedestrianized paths. You know, you know, I read these.
18:41 Griffin McElroy? Yes.
18:41 Travis McElroy? When you write them, you know, I read them out loud. Don't do things like that.
18:45 Griffin McElroy? Drop a little couch trips for you along the way.
18:47 Travis McElroy? Pedestrianized, yeah, thank you. Hey, I'm just saying, question asker, that makes it sound like they didn't begin as paths for pedestrians, but pedestrians have taken them over.
18:55 Griffin McElroy? Yeah.
18:55 Travis McElroy? Yeah.
18:56 Griffin McElroy? Cool.
18:56 Travis McElroy? I've seen nobody jog at the zoo ever, but people do come in to walk with their dogs. How can I start jogging at the zoo without alerting the zoo's security and losing my job? This is from Tid and Tid and Tid and Tid and Tid Park. Berlin. That must be a weird fucking experience for a dog.
19:14 Travis McElroy? To go and walk around the zoo?
19:16 Griffin McElroy? Yeah, sure.
19:17 Travis McElroy? Yeah. Where the dog's like, I have a hard time with squirrels. What the fuck is that?
19:22 Griffin McElroy? It would be like if you took me on a trip to monster jail. And it was like humans, sort of, but they were 12 feet tall with like claws and crazy shit.
19:32 Travis McElroy? Yeah.
19:32 Griffin McElroy? I was like, cool, cool. They look alarmingly like me, cool.
19:35 Travis McElroy? So you're saying stay small? Say nice, I guess.
19:39 Griffin McElroy? I feel like the zoo is one of those places you cannot run, like a poolside or a courthouse or there's not a lot of places, but I feel like zoo is one of those places. Because if I see someone running at the zoo, I'm also going to start running at the zoo.
19:55 Travis McElroy? Yes, so right.
19:56 Griffin McElroy? Because the gorillas are, the gorillas gone out.
19:58 Travis McElroy? I a hundred percent agree with you. I feel like running at the zoo is like yelling fire in a crowded theater.
20:05 Griffin McElroy? Yeah.
20:05 Travis McElroy? There is an assumption if you're running at the zoo. Now, I think I also have an assumption that even if you weren't being chased, by running at the zoo and running past the large animals there, I feel like you're running the risk of triggering some sort of biological.
20:21 Griffin McElroy? Absolutely.
20:22 Travis McElroy? You know what I mean?
20:23 Griffin McElroy? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
20:23 Travis McElroy? Normally they wouldn't, but they're like, something in their brains like, gotta kill it.
20:28 Griffin McElroy? Yeah, sure.
20:28 Travis McElroy? Gotta do it. Go. I think that there is a level of animation one could achieve to like a high, a hyper jogging animation one might see on a cartoon, where people will be like, that's jogging, right? Where there's no panic there.
20:45 Griffin McElroy? Sweatband, you, oh, yeah, okay, good point.
20:46 Travis McElroy? And you're like fully pumping. Sweatband, short shorts.
20:49 Griffin McElroy? Yeah, ankle weights, wrist weights.
20:52 Travis McElroy? That's why, that's why the mall, the Heinz Mall printed out those T-shirts and said like, I'm not insane, I paid to be a mall walker, which maybe that makes me insane, I don't know. You gotta pay? Yeah, man, because you get in early. You can go in before, like, that's how some people got, like, would get early in line for consoles. They would pay to be a mall walker and they would go walk up to the babbages and stand outside of it and then go get a console. That's a very generational indication that an, of an age where someone would be worried that the mall might be too crowded to walk around in during business hours.
21:32 Griffin McElroy? Fair point.
21:33 Travis McElroy? Yeah, or maybe they just don't want a bunch of fucking jabronis with Forever 21 bags slowing down their, their critical path, right? You can't draft behind somebody with a bunch of bags from Spencer Gifts, you know what I mean? They're gonna blow your line. Yeah.
21:49 Griffin McElroy? Um, no one has jogged at the zoo ever. People do come in with their dogs. Can you get a dog and run, jog with the dog?
21:56 Travis McElroy? Oh, a big marmaduke type, and it looks like he's walking you. I can't help a dog. You are living in a fool's paradise. Do you think that a dog is going to run past huge animals? No way. No way. He's gonna stop and bark at them.
22:13 Griffin McElroy? Um.
22:14 Travis McElroy? He's gonna at least smell them.
22:15 Griffin McElroy? I'm, the takeaway I'm having from this question is it's, people can bring dogs into zoos.
22:20 Travis McElroy? Yeah.
22:21 Griffin McElroy? I'm having a really hard time getting past that point.
22:23 Travis McElroy? Yeah, what if you lose it and the zookeeper's like, well? Ours now. You're an animal. You know what I mean?
22:29 Griffin McElroy? It's, guess what? It's zoo now.
22:32 Travis McElroy? Yeah, you're part of the zoo.
22:36 Travis McElroy? I was wondering the other day if my dog would bark at a dinosaur or not.
22:40 Griffin McElroy? Why were you wondering about that?
22:41 Travis McElroy? I think I was watching a trailer for Jurassic World and it got me thinking about, in Jurassic World, the first one, Bryce Dallas Howard talks about no one comes to the zoo, to the, to the dinosaur zoo anymore. Cause people are bored of seeing dinosaurs, so they're gonna make bigger, scarier dinosaurs. And I said, no one wants bigger, scarier dinosaurs. They want littler dinosaurs that they can keep at home.
23:01 Griffin McElroy? I remember your thesis.
23:02 Travis McElroy? Yeah. And then I thought, if I had like a 10 foot tall dinosaur in my backyard, would my dogs get along with it or lose their shit at it?
23:11 Griffin McElroy? Your imagination is so fantastic.
23:15 Travis McElroy? Thank you.
23:15 Griffin McElroy? And fantastical. And I, I find myself every day thinking how jealous I am to be able to think of things like, what if there was a 10 foot dinosaur in my backyard? I never think about shit like that.
23:27 Travis McElroy? Not what if there was a 10 foot dinosaur in my backyard? How would my dogs react to a 10 foot dinosaur in my backyard?
23:32 Griffin McElroy? You're, that's even a step beyond, like, first of all, I would have to imagine that I had dogs, was the type of person who liked being around dogs for extended periods of time and wanted to own a dog. And then the dinosaur thing, and then what if they met? Uh, like, that's five steps that there's, I just couldn't.
23:47 Travis McElroy? Lily would get along great. Buttercup would not care for it.
23:49 Griffin McElroy? Buttercup would fucking definitely not.
23:51 Travis McElroy? I, I think part of the issue is.
23:55 Travis McElroy? You don't see running at places. I think if you run at places where people are supposed to stop and look at stuff.
24:03 Griffin McElroy? Yeah.
24:04 Travis McElroy? I think it kind of screams privilege, you know? It kind of said, it would be like if you're at the museum and you're running at the museum and you're like, there's a painting. There's another painting. There's another painting. It's like, yeah, you're just blowing past them. You're not stopping to enjoy the paintings. If you run past a dolphin and the dolphin's like, look at me, I can think and I have a hole that shoots air. And you're just like, don't care. The dolphin might be like, well, a lot of people, other people used to care. You know what I mean? When they made the Flipper Show and stuff, people used to love dolphins.
24:32 Griffin McElroy? You're worried about hurting the animal's feelings.
24:34 Travis McElroy? Well, it's not just that. It's like if you stop to, if you stop to look at a dolphin, right? You're like, shit. You know what I mean?
24:42 Griffin McElroy? Every time. Yeah.
24:43 Travis McElroy? This thing's cold. It's like zipping through the water. It feels so free.
24:46 Griffin McElroy? Okay.
24:47 Travis McElroy? And then, and then some guy is like, on your left, on your left. And you're like, I guess you feel like, I guess I'm kind of an idiot for looking at these stupid dolphins so long. I guess they are kind of boring. That guy just didn't even look at them. I guess I'm the idiot because that guy just ran past and didn't even look at them. I wasted my time. Maybe there's better animals that this guy knows about.
25:05 Griffin McElroy? Yeah. What is he jogging towards? And those animals, they only let a few people see them every day. He's gonna.
25:11 Travis McElroy? I don't want to miss my window.
25:12 Griffin McElroy? They get all used up.
25:13 Travis McElroy? But here's the problem, Justin, as a man who does move quickly through museums and such.
25:18 Griffin McElroy? Life.
25:19 Travis McElroy? Yeah, life. I find myself when I stop to appreciate, say, a painting or an animal or whatever, the speed at which my brain goes, how long do I need to stand here and appreciate it? Before I can move on, you know, once you stop, now it's an indefinite amount of time where you're looking at a thing. Fifteen seconds and you're like, I get zebras.
25:42 Griffin McElroy? Every docent I've talked to said, if they see someone looking at a painting for 15 seconds, they think this guy gets it.
25:49 Travis McElroy? More than that, they're, they're case.
25:51 Griffin McElroy? More than that, you, you're, you're just not gonna get it.
25:54 Travis McElroy? If you're an awkward person who's thinking too much about this at a museum, you gotta practice my method. I know we've had a pretty visual episode so far, but.
26:02 Griffin McElroy? Yeah.
26:02 Travis McElroy? The trick is to, to not let your body ever fully stop moving. Oh, okay. You walk up and you see the art and then like, your feet slow down, but now your head's moving like, huh, you're looking at it, but then when your head stops to look, oh, now the feet are moving. Oh, now we're crossing over here, right?
26:19 Griffin McElroy? And then we're kinda looking, and then we're looking at it from this angle. Yeah.
26:23 Travis McElroy? And then before you know it, I'm gone.
26:24 Griffin McElroy? Justin's doing a lot of.
26:25 Travis McElroy? I already, I already looked at the art.
26:26 Griffin McElroy? Justin's doing a lot of bending at 45 degree angles.
26:30 Travis McElroy? Interesting, interesting.
26:31 Griffin McElroy? And I'm turning to get a better look at it. Yeah. And then as I'm turning to get a better look at it, oh, what's that? I'm on to the next art.
26:37 Travis McElroy? It also helps I find myself in that scenario. Looking at me, looking at the art would think, he looked at that fucking perfectly. He looked at it the exact right amount. He looked at it from all the right angles. He said the right things. He nodded his head. When you look at it from the last angle, if you announce, oh, okay, then, yeah, ah, okay. Yeah. The, the fucking patented, like, if you really, if you get stuck and you're like, I feel like I've been looking at this too long. People are looking at me. If you need it out, I would highly recommend the quick swoop back to look at the plate. Yeah, that breaks it.
27:11 Griffin McElroy? A little nod, a little nod, acrylic, that's what I thought.
27:14 Travis McElroy? Scoot your face up like you forgot, like, wait, was it acrylic or what? And then you swoop back into the plate, watercolor. Okay. And then you're like.
27:21 Griffin McElroy? Then you're out of there. You're disengaged.
27:23 Travis McElroy? And maybe remove your glasses and touch your eyeballs in a way it's not clear if you're just like, oh, rubbing his eyes. Or maybe there was a tear. We don't know. The plate's good if you need a reset too, because you could squint at that for a while, like you're reading it, and no one's got the patience to watch you do that.
27:39 Griffin McElroy? Yeah, yeah.
27:39 Travis McElroy? It's a good reset.
27:40 Griffin McElroy? Hey, can I ask you guys a question hypothetical? Fun to think about, fun to talk about?
27:44 Travis McElroy? Nothing that I've said has been hypothetical, by the way, or a bit. This is a hundred percent.
27:48 Griffin McElroy? That's how you do it. You, you.
27:49 Travis McElroy? Now I navigate the world.
27:50 Griffin McElroy? Absolutely. Um, if you guys got to go in a museum and it was just gonna be you in there for like an afternoon, do you think you would have some sort of like powerful experience in there? Just given the time and freedom, do you think you would come out of there after your afternoon of solo art appreciation? Some of the great masterworks, do you think you're coming out of there like, fuck, like, I get it, I've changed now?
28:12 Travis McElroy? I really get it now. If you've been creeped out by the Mona Lisa, that's different. You know what I mean? If you've been like, if you've ever had the threat, if you've ever had the thought, I think the Mona Lisa is gonna Five Nights at Freddy's me.
28:25 Griffin McElroy? Yeah.
28:25 Travis McElroy? Then that's really, you've experienced it on a deep level, I think.
28:29 Griffin McElroy? Five Nights at Lou Vee's is something, something powerful, indeed.
28:33 Travis McElroy? All the great, all the great masterworks come to life. I think you're talking about Night of the Museum, you guys.
28:39 Griffin McElroy? Look at, oh, okay, yes, thank you. Travis is right, it is, yeah, it's basically Night of the Museum and.
28:45 Travis McElroy? We're just backing it. Yeah, you backed it via Five Nights at Freddy's.
28:49 Griffin McElroy? Sorry, sorry.
28:50 Travis McElroy? You got to. This was just a three-point turn, we were just backing in.
28:54 Griffin McElroy? We had to stop, we had to stop, do a pit stop at Five Nights at Freddy's to get to Night of the Museum.
28:59 Travis McElroy? You drove too far, you passed Night of the Museum, you had to pull into Five Nights at Freddy's driveway. And they're like, were we having guests? Oh, no, they're going back to Night of the Museum.
29:09 Griffin McElroy? I'm envisioning a half corroded Cowboy Owen Wilson, just like his metal jaw hanging open, like doing his bits, being all scary coming out of the vents.
29:18 Travis McElroy? I would watch that, man.
29:21 Griffin McElroy? What a time.
29:22 Travis McElroy? What a man, what a movie. I think we're ready for one more grown up gritty one before we call it quits on the night. Nightmare at the Museum.
29:31 Griffin McElroy? Could be something, could be it.
29:33 Travis McElroy? Wow, we've been talking so long, guys.
29:34 Griffin McElroy? No kidding, dude.
29:35 Travis McElroy? Yeah, dude, you know what the problem is? I just love talking to you guys.
29:39 Griffin McElroy? I just love talking to you guys.
29:40 Travis McElroy? But you know what I really love talking to you guys about most?
29:43 Griffin McElroy? Products.
29:44 Travis McElroy? Conversations that net us income.
29:46 Griffin McElroy? Absolutely.
29:48 Travis McElroy? Not even close, let's go.
29:58 Travis McElroy? All right, guys, I'm looking at the copy here for Squarespace. It says they want us to do like a teen-focused, kind of hipper version, something that's really going to appeal to the youth.
30:10 Griffin McElroy? Okay, yeah, I got it.
30:12 Travis McElroy? Oh, Griffin, you got it?
30:13 Griffin McElroy? Yeah, I can handle that, for sure. That's easy. This podcast is sponsored by Squarespace. We should say that, just to cover ourselves legally. Listen, if you own a business or are some sort of independent contractor, artist, creator of some sort, and you need an online platform where you can offer your services and get paid all in one place and get paid on time with professional on-brand invoices and online payment systems and streamline your workflow with built-in appointment scheduling and email marketing tools, if this is a thing that you need in your life because you're creative with no idea how this side of the world works, Squarespace can help you out. And I'm going to get to the teen stuff here in just a little bit.
30:57 Travis McElroy? Okay, yeah, I didn't want to interrupt. Oh, I did want to interrupt, but I was noticing a lack of anything that would appeal to the youth demographic.
31:05 Griffin McElroy? No, but they're patient, so teens, I promise I'm going to get you in the end. So Squarespace is amazing. We've all used it. I mean, the three of us, I don't know if everyone listening has used it, but the three of us have used it a bunch of times. I've made a couple of websites with it. Couldn't be easier. They look great. They have amazing templates, great support, everything that you need, and again, like a lot of great tools for helping you run a little business, if that's what your calling is. Head to Squarespace.com/MyBrother for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, use offer code MYBROTHER to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Got a number one victory royale. Yeah, Fortnite, you got it, man. Number one on the board right now, just for Tomato Town.
31:50 Travis McElroy? Okay, yeah, that worked. It was a lot of it condensed right there at the end. But the, yeah, Stan's is loving it. Justin?
31:59 Griffin McElroy? I punched my office chair like four times while flossing just then and it's really bad. I think I heard it.
32:05 Travis McElroy? Justin, stamps.com actually is looking for the same thing, but they specifically said they wanted you to do it because they think you're the most in touch with the youth demographic.
32:14 Griffin McElroy? That's so fucking crazy.
32:15 Travis McElroy? You can't trick me. I'm your older brother. Nice fucking try. No, it says right here. Listen, last time I went to the post office, the post office gentleman looked at me and he said, and he gave me a crate of packages that he'd been saving from my post office box there at the
32:29 Griffin McElroy? post office.
32:30 Travis McElroy? Post office, because I don't go in frequently enough. And he said to me, I thought you were turning over a new leaf. Wow. Cause I told him that I was gonna turn over a new leaf and come in more frequently to collect the winnings from my post office that all you kind people send all your cereals and what have you to P O box 5400 in West Virginia 25706. Don't send any more Kraft mac and cheese. We're good. Thank you.
32:53 Travis McElroy? But I can't turn over a new leaf because I'm too busy at home printing off all my postage. Cause I don't need to go to the post office as much anymore. Cause stamps.com makes it so easy to do at home. I put the thing on the scale. They print the postage and they do it for a a lot cheaper than the guys at the place.
33:12 Griffin McElroy? It's actually in the ad copy. They say be proud of that fat. Like say that, but you don't have to.
33:18 Travis McElroy? Don't waste time worrying about physical responsibility. It's kind of their main thing. So.
33:21 Griffin McElroy? Travis, you gotta, you're stepping all over it. He's gonna get to the teen stuff.
33:25 Travis McElroy? Oh, okay. Don't waste time worrying about being a postage expert or standing in line to drop off letters and packages. Let stamps.com do what they do best. So you can do what you do better vape. Go to stamps.com and use code MYBROTHER to sign up for a special offer. No contract cancel anytime. That's stamps.com. Code my brother. It will make, make things easier for you. Stamps.com does not endorse vaping of any kind. It's not a vaping business.
33:53 Griffin McElroy? But no.
33:54 Travis McElroy? But it is for real vapers only.
33:57 Griffin McElroy? Yes, but it's not.
33:59 Travis McElroy? It's not.
34:00 Griffin McElroy? It's not.
34:02 Travis McElroy? Wink.
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35:42 Travis McElroy? I wanna munch, squad!
35:46 Travis McElroy? I want to munch, squad!
35:49 Griffin McElroy? I love mixing in some new electronic instrumentation in there. It's very, very modern rock, very...
35:55 Travis McElroy? Well, I have to change with the times, or else what am I doing over here, man? So, you guys like, you wanna talk about Sydney Sweeney? Do you want to talk about Sydney Sweeney?
36:06 Griffin McElroy? Every time that she has, I feel like, come up in our sort of area, it has been for a product that is being sold that maybe features something she touched or looked at or.
36:20 Travis McElroy? I think it would be exciting, though, to be the first three straight white men with an opinion on Sydney Sweeney. That would be exciting. That would be very groundbreaking, I think. Um, no, this is not about Sydney Sweeney selling her bath water, although, I mean, good honor if I could get away with it 100%. Sure. No question.
36:39 Griffin McElroy? No one wants my yucky stuff.
36:41 Travis McElroy? Not even. Environmentally friendly, if you think about it. Reduce, reuse, recycle. Yeah. Uh, so, uh, so Sydney Sweeney didn't sell her bath water. That's great. But that's not what we're here to talk about today, guys, because we're here to talk about, like, I don't know if Sydney Sweeney really loves taking baths or not. And I don't actually know if it makes her feel happy deep down in her heart to sell her bath water to a bunch of people in soap. I don't know. But I do know that she loves Baskin Robbins. So fucking much, she can't even handle it sometimes. Yeah. How do I know? Because Baskin Robbins is bringing serious star power to your ice cream outings this summer with the launch of the Sweet on Sydney menu, a limited time offering cooked created with longtime Baskin Robbins fan and actress. She always demands those credits be listed in those.
37:24 Griffin McElroy? In that exact order.
37:25 Travis McElroy? Yeah, Sydney. I'm a double threat.
37:27 Griffin McElroy? I think in IMDB, at the very top, it does say Baskin Robbins, the crazy enthusiast.
37:33 Travis McElroy? Available starting July 1st, the Sweet on Sydney menu celebrates Sydney's signature sweet tooth and love of Baskin Robbins with two colorful creations, perfect for a refreshing summer snack. Now, I do, I do enjoy, I just want to show you guys, just to give you guys a little bit of.
37:50 Griffin McElroy? I mean, Baskin Robbins usually comes correct.
37:53 Travis McElroy? I have been chasing the high of the Baskin Robbins little clown sundae cup for kids where the cone is the hat and they put the frosting like on the thing.
38:03 Griffin McElroy? You can't go home again, man. It's not gonna hit the same way.
38:07 Travis McElroy? They do those, they call them creature creation. But it's not the same now because I'm a grown up and I think about everything. And there's so much adult context to eating it now. The joy of getting that when you're a child can't be replaced.
38:19 Griffin McElroy? Can't be beaten. Are you trying to show us multimedia?
38:22 Travis McElroy? No, I'm trying to get you guys to shut up.
38:26 Griffin McElroy? You have a look on your face sometimes, Jesus, when it looks like you're trying to get something to load or screen share. And I thought I clocked that on your face. I apologize. I was mistaken.
38:33 Travis McElroy? No, that's okay. It's fine. Uh, no, I was gonna show you this video, but it's like-
38:38 Griffin McElroy? Oh, so I was right.
38:40 Griffin McElroy? And you made me feel bad about it anyway.
38:41 Travis McElroy? Okay, let's not do this. No one wants this. You know what I mean?
38:45 Griffin McElroy? Yeah.
38:45 Travis McElroy? We don't need to do this. I love talking to you guys. Yeah, it's still fun.
38:48 Griffin McElroy? No, I-
38:51 Travis McElroy? Said with such personal emphasis- What I would say is, what I would say is- Officially, for the record, I would do it if I didn't have to.
38:59 Griffin McElroy? Yeah, that's a really good bottom line for us to take on. Yeah.
39:04 Travis McElroy? I would talk-
39:04 Griffin McElroy? There's a lot of shit I do that I definitely would not do if not, you know, fully obligated to do it.
39:11 Travis McElroy? I do, I just wanted to, I, I have these two different pictures. I'm trying to get the video to, to, to, for you guys. I just feel like it's, that there is an exact Sydney Sweeney selling stuff to you pose that Sydney Sweeney has nailed. And, uh, just comparing these, these images, there's a, there's an exact, uh, uh, look on the face that says, hey, buy this from me, Sydney Sweeney.
39:34 Griffin McElroy? I'm looking at, I'm not looking at you. There's something up and to the right that is-
39:38 Travis McElroy? Yeah, there's something up and to the right over here that that's, that's the taller you that you could be if you buy this thing from me. I'm excited to see a picture of this person. I don't have any context for who they are. They're very low profile, but I hear their name whispered sometimes.
39:52 Griffin McElroy? Yeah.
39:52 Travis McElroy? Well, get ready, cause they've got a menu that you're about to enjoy.
39:56 Griffin McElroy? Cool.
39:57 Travis McElroy? Oh.
40:01 Speaker 06 Um, is that Sydney Sweeney? Oh, yeah, it is. She really loves our rainbow sherbet. She comes here all the time. Wait, seriously?
40:18 Griffin McElroy? Is Sydney Sweeney posing outside about?
40:21 Travis McElroy? Your scoop is ready.
40:22 Griffin McElroy? It's hard to know how honey she is for ice cream. And she's sneaking in at night and eating the ice cream when they ask her not to.
40:30 Speaker 06 That's so cool. Yeah.
40:34 Speaker 06 It can be.
40:36 Speaker 07 Summer's looking sweet at Baskin Robbins. Try my new suite on Sydney menu. Available at Baskin Robbins nationwide for a limited time.
40:49 Travis McElroy? Okay.
40:51 Travis McElroy? So that's her, that's her favorite. There is an underlying horror to that commercial. The way that the Baskin Robbins employee says it can be.
41:05 Griffin McElroy? Yeah.
41:06 Travis McElroy? Impplies that there is a deep fear behind his eyes that he is afraid to voice. Yes, that when he opens the store in the middle of the night, Sydney Sweeney is there stealing ice cream.
41:18 Griffin McElroy? Waiting.
41:19 Travis McElroy? And she's like, what? And he's too afraid to say anything. Hey, what? This is like, I don't know Sydney Sweeney personally and I, I would never like impugn her, her character. Cause I don't know her as a person.
41:33 Griffin McElroy? No.
41:33 Travis McElroy? But I do think we need to allow for the possibility that if you are close to Sydney Sweeney, you suddenly gain access to an horrible truth about the universe and the nature of yourself or something, something truly terrifying that you can't communicate to anybody else.
41:48 Griffin McElroy? That is what the commercial seems to suggest. I hope one day I am famous in a particular way where a brand will come to me and say, we got a whole campaign we want to do. And the whole thing with the campaign is that you're a fucking sicko freak for our shit.
42:02 Travis McElroy? Yeah.
42:02 Griffin McElroy? And I want to partner up with Taco Bell and have there be a commercial where like, I keep coming in to use the Taco Bell bathroom. And eventually the guy at Taco Bell is like, sir, you can't keep coming in here just to use the, just to use the bathroom. Is that Griffin McElroy? Yeah, he's a.
42:17 Travis McElroy? But I'm beloved actor. Yeah. And I'm kind of acting like a weird android who's horny for the Taco Bell bathroom.
42:23 Griffin McElroy? Hollywood blockbuster star Griffin McElroy. He can, he says he can only shit in our Taco Bell bathroom.
42:29 Travis McElroy? I want both of you guys, okay, I want to give you the, the lead up paragraph. And then after that, I want both of you guys to give me the, the Sydney Sweeney pull quote about this partnership. I want you guys to give me what you think.
42:42 Griffin McElroy? I imagine every pull quote is going to be like.
42:43 Travis McElroy? Ah, give me that cold creamy stuff. Okay, so this is out of cafe. You can change the locks as much as you want. You're not fucking keeping me out. The quote, I will tell you for, for consistency's sake, the quote is out of cafe. I'm Sydney Sweeney Todd, bitch. I'll get in there, mess you up. The quote is out of cafe. It is Sydney Sweeney, the entrepreneur, and not Sydney Sweeney, the freak for Baskin Robbins, okay? At the heart of the new menu is Sydney's signature scoop, which features rainbow sherbet in a chocolate dipped waffle cone with rainbow sprinkles and topped with gummy bear minis. I will just say this.
43:18 Griffin McElroy? Oh, man.
43:21 Travis McElroy? Chocolate plus rainbow sherbet's disgusting.
43:23 Griffin McElroy? That's fucked up. Yeah, you've probably.
43:25 Travis McElroy? Disgusting, Sydney.
43:25 Griffin McElroy? Also, as someone who did work at the country's best yogurt for a couple summers.
43:29 Travis McElroy? Thank you.
43:29 Griffin McElroy? Please listen to me and please know that I'm speaking the truth. You can't put gummy anythings on ice cream. It turns them into
43:38 Travis McElroy? Two rocks.
43:38 Griffin McElroy? A truly unpleasant, uh, tooth texture experience.
43:42 Travis McElroy? Yes. Joining the scoop is a new, refreshing beverage. Sydney's, Sydney's signature fizz, which blends rainbow sherbet with starry lemon lime soda. And it's topped with gummy bear minis.
43:55 Griffin McElroy? No.
43:56 Travis McElroy? That's a choking hazard.
43:57 Griffin McElroy? Yeah, why would you put?
43:59 Travis McElroy? Thank you, Sydney. You choked me to death. I love you for it. I'm also dead. The summary sip will be available to a lucky few in exclusive, limited time, color changing. Oh, I wanted it to be in exchange for something. In exchange for. For this firstborn child. Okay.
44:17 Griffin McElroy? I mean, we did, we did do it at TCBW. We did. I just want to get out there and say sorbet fizz, uh, while I was still working there as spray.
44:23 Travis McElroy? Kevin sorbet fizz. But at the time, we didn't know that much about Kevin sorbet.
44:29 Griffin McElroy? He hadn't gone, gone sour yet.
44:31 Travis McElroy? Okay. So he's Kevin Sourbo. Give me my quote. Uh, Griffin first. What's the quote from Sydney Sweeney?
44:37 Griffin McElroy? I can't start. I can't start. My summer hasn't officially started until I've chomped down on.
44:44 Travis McElroy? Oh, now you know she didn't say chomp down. So I'm going to joke.
44:47 Griffin McElroy? My summer can't start without Baskin Robbins there, without the cold, without sherbet from Baskin Robbins and these gummy bears on them.
44:57 Griffin McElroy? Okay.
44:58 Travis McElroy? I think something like, as a longtime Baskin Robbins fan, I'm so excited to be able to get to partner with them and bring this fantastical summer flavor to life.
45:10 Griffin McElroy? Yeah. Definitely not gonna go a single clause without establishing that she is a freak for this Baskin Robbins.
45:16 Travis McElroy? We have been doing this, we have been doing this bit too long officially. Baskin Robbins has been part of my life for as long as I can remember.
45:22 Griffin McElroy? Bazinga.
45:23 Travis McElroy? It's where a lot of great memories were made, and I still find myself going back pretty often, said Sweeney. Rainbow sherbet has always been a favorite, so getting to see it featured like this really feels special.
45:34 Griffin McElroy? Awesome.
45:35 Travis McElroy? Listen, I don't wanna, I don't wanna hate on Rainbow sherbet, but it kinda feels like every other-
45:40 Griffin McElroy? It's vulgar.
45:41 Travis McElroy? Every other flavor has already been paired with a celebrity, and they're like, "We've got Rainbow sherbet left, Sidney."
45:50 Griffin McElroy? Who's gonna do it?
45:50 Travis McElroy? If you mix it with gummy bears, maybe you can call it your thing. The only thing worse is Wild and Reckless, and my kids love that one, and I think it's disgusting.
45:56 Griffin McElroy? What is it?
45:56 Travis McElroy? "We're always looking to give our Baskin Robbins guests their favorite flavors in new and exciting ways," says Nicole Boutwell, who works there. "Sidney's love for Baskin Robbins runs deep. We're so excited to put her signature scoop on the menu alongside a new, refreshing way to enjoy it in a fizz. This bold and fun duo is sure to be a go-to order this summer."
46:18 Griffin McElroy? It's just, there's lots of ways that companies work with celebrities in a fictional manner. Sometimes it's fun, like, they're the new president of flavor blasting or something, and then they're at the Super Bowl, like, "What's up? It's me, Tom Bodett, I have a new job." Probably wouldn't be him, it'd be like a, you know, Julie Louis-Dreyfus, "I'm in charge of flavor blasting, now I'm the president." Some sort of fictional sort of role, but then sometimes they are just like, say, this person likes it. Doesn't that mean something to you?
46:49 Travis McElroy? Huh?
46:50 Griffin McElroy? Come get it. They like it.
46:51 Travis McElroy? I would like to see one of these, be it a Tim Biebs or a Ryan Reynolds, whatever his thing was, or Sydney Sweeney's scoop. If they just came out and said, and Baskin Robbins said, I would get $1 for everyone sold. So please go buy them. I have expensive tastes and I really like-
47:08 Griffin McElroy? They should have to, if we have to say in our, on a YouTube video, we're playing, you know, we, we got these Ryan's World toys directly from Ryan's World. If we have to legally say that to remain FCC compliant, I do think it would be dope if, if Ryan Reynolds had to be like, and also, I get a dollar every time you guys do this.
47:31 Travis McElroy? Every time you sign up, I get a little bit.
47:33 Griffin McElroy? I get a dollar. I like this, I like sherbet ice cream. The commercial ends with Sydney Sweeney barreling the camera. I like this ice cream.
47:40 Travis McElroy? I like this ice cream and there's nothing you can do about it.
47:42 Griffin McElroy? But I'm, and I think it is cool that more people are gonna eat it. I'm doing this because they said they would give me $1 for every one of these cones they sell.
47:50 Travis McElroy? So, uh, before we go, I do just want to share this because I thought it was delightful. Uh, unrelated, Christophe Poirier is the chief new concept officer for a restaurant spinoff.
48:02 Griffin McElroy? Okay.
48:03 Travis McElroy? Okay. I'm not gonna show you the restaurant spinoff yet. We'll show that at the end. Um, and this is his quote about the new spinoff.
48:08 Griffin McElroy? I didn't know you could spin off restaurants.
48:10 Travis McElroy? Sure, sure you did.
48:13 Travis McElroy? Okay. I've told you, told you lots of times, like at Cosmic, the, the drinks, the drinks only McDonald's. Remember drinks only McDonald's?
48:20 Griffin McElroy? That felt like a poorly funded-
48:22 Travis McElroy? Remember the robot Taco Bell that was only run by robots?
48:24 Griffin McElroy? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I remember that. Yeah, yeah.
48:25 Travis McElroy? A lot of customers right now are chasing culture. They're not necessarily focusing on, I want to have a boneless chicken product.
48:33 Griffin McElroy? That's true.
48:34 Travis McElroy? Nobody wants that. They just want, not even an experience, a vibe.
48:40 Travis McElroy? And it's funny because a lot of brands are focusing on the experience. I think experience is a little bit basic. I have five Gen Z's at home. I'm the happy father of a blended family. None of my kids said, hey dad, today I'm really looking forward to a great experience.
48:54 Griffin McElroy? Fuck yeah, man. This is the best press release ever. Is this still a press release?
48:59 Travis McElroy? No, this is, this is an, this is a, this is part of a story about this, this launch. And I just say, if, if you say to an, like, a one human being or a group of human being, my children looked at me today and said, I'm not looking forward to a great experience.
49:15 Griffin McElroy? No, they didn't say that. The kids, the kids, okay, sorry, we do need to be clear here.
49:21 Travis McElroy? Yes.
49:21 Griffin McElroy? This is not a situation where the kids told their dad, I'm not looking forward to a great experience. This is a situation where the kids did not say to their dad that they want a great experience. Those are two completely different scenarios.
49:32 Travis McElroy? None of my kids, because this guy's the dad of a happy blended family that five Gen Z's. And none of my kids said, hey dad, today I'm really looking forward to the great experience. No, they're looking for the vibe.
49:43 Griffin McElroy? Yes.
49:44 Travis McElroy? This is what they're expecting. What they're looking forward to with brands. It's something that reflects their personalities and not just fits their appetite. They love individuality, strong flavors and a shareable experience.
49:59 Griffin McElroy? Wait, wait. No, Travis, he's got to take some baby steps back to boneless chicken wings.
50:05 Travis McElroy? And a shareable experience, but not a great experience. But I would say the success is all about the vibe and just the magnetic attraction of the brand.
50:16 Griffin McElroy? Yes, finally, someone who gets me.
50:19 Travis McElroy? You get it. So here's the, here's, here it is.
50:21 Griffin McElroy? Oh, man. Yeah, man. Yeah, dude. This is Saucy by KFC. This is Saucy, Saucy by KFC.
50:31 Travis McElroy? The exclamation point at the end of Saucy is very distracting from. Some kind of accent placed between the U and the C that looks like a frowny face.
50:42 Griffin McElroy? It's a dip thong. It's an umlaut.
50:44 Travis McElroy? I want to tell you guys, I'm just gonna hit you guys with more Christophe Poirier info about saucy because it's in Orlando. It's pink instead of red. Our restaurant does not look like a shoebox. There's a lot of windows.
50:56 Griffin McElroy? Yeah, dude. Fucking, this guy's really, really got my number.
51:00 Travis McElroy? It will allow us to unlock marketing synergies through geographic proximity.
51:04 Griffin McElroy? Okay. I'm imagining him hovering over like a shattered chunk of the earth that has raised out beneath him as he channels these powers through.
51:14 Travis McElroy? A geyser of sauce raising up the chunk.
51:17 Griffin McElroy? Yeah.
51:18 Travis McElroy? I like disruption, Poirier says. And what is the meaning of disruption? You take conventions and you take, no, sorry, wait, this is Adam Driver from Megalopolis.
51:29 Griffin McElroy? This is Sephiroth.
51:32 Travis McElroy? What is the meaning of disruption? You take conventions and you turn convention upside down. Right now in the world, many brands are focusing on chicken tenders. So the world does not need another one focusing on chicken tenders because you're in the crowd. I believe in disruption, which means what if the side is the core and the core is the side? When people are focusing on tenders, I truly believe the core is the sauce. And then tenders and fries are becoming the side. And then it opens up to a new blue ocean of opportunities. Gen Z, they love to explore. They love random things.
52:14 Travis McElroy? Our 11 sauces, it's very often that I see customers taking fries and mixing in one sauce in another, making their own cocktails. It's really what people want.
52:28 Travis McElroy? That is 100% uninterrupted. The quote from this person, that whoever he has spoken to in this has not even given the dignity of a Poirier explained excitedly.
52:43 Griffin McElroy? Yeah.
52:44 Travis McElroy? There is, there is.
52:46 Griffin McElroy? His eyes wide and wild.
52:48 Travis McElroy? This, this, this, they have let this man absolutely go off.
52:53 Griffin McElroy? Yeah.
52:54 Travis McElroy? Talking about saucy by.
52:55 Griffin McElroy? No interrupt, no Poirier shrieked emphatically.
52:58 Travis McElroy? Waving his hands dramatically in a way that I felt I was about to be struck, not out of anger, but merely out of gesticulatory excitement.
53:06 Griffin McElroy? As a beam of light pierced his chest through the ground into the heavens.
53:12 Travis McElroy? Right now.
53:13 Griffin McElroy? I got excited.
53:14 Travis McElroy? Low price points are everywhere, but the true definition of value is what you, you get for what you pay. And I truly believe that value should not be at the expense of the buyer. Poirier says, Chiquito is a nickname to say cute and little in Spanish.
53:32 Griffin McElroy? Yes.
53:33 Travis McElroy? And when you move it to chick and saucy chick, we like to play on words and we like to play on names. This is because saucy for me is really an attitude.
53:43 Griffin McElroy? God damn.
53:44 Travis McElroy? So even a name, we could have called it a chicken taco or a chicken wrap, but the moment you call it a saucy Chiquito, there is a vibe.
53:52 Griffin McElroy? Don't you see?
53:53 Travis McElroy? Don't you see?
53:56 Griffin McElroy? Don't you see it?
53:57 Travis McElroy? You're blind.
53:59 Griffin McElroy? It's an omni-channel brand.
54:02 Travis McElroy? The best way to attract bees and butterflies is not to try and catch them. Cultivate a beautiful garden with beautiful flowers and bees and butterflies will come. We definitely want to double down or triple down on the success that we have in Orlando. If anyone ever says we want to double down on the success we've had in Orlando, send them to prison.
54:27 Griffin McElroy? Yeah.
54:28 Travis McElroy? So we will definitely come up with new openings very soon. He added.
54:35 Travis McElroy? As he cackled into the night, flying off on his flying chicken wing. Oh, Kristoff for you. What a, what a treat. Look for saucy. We're gonna be.
54:45 Griffin McElroy? Dude, I actually, I'm kinda down. Some of those picks looked alright, and I do like sauce quite a bit. I just wish that it wasn't being run by fucking Kefka. Uh, that would be ideal for me.
54:56 Travis McElroy? Well, you can't always get what you want. I'm gonna disrupt, uh, the chicken tenders game and turn it completely around with fish brittles.
55:05 Griffin McElroy? Fish brittles?
55:06 Travis McElroy? Yeah. You've had chicken tenders. Mmm, these are fish brittles.
55:10 Griffin McElroy? Okay. What form do those take?
55:13 Travis McElroy? Uh, they're just kinda thin, and when you try to bite into them, it just shatters. Kinda like sticks? Uh, more like thin sheets that can also be used to write on or panes of glass. Like Nori? Yeah. Like, like finally seaweed gets real and it's made out of fish. Imagine peanut brittle, but made out of fish and clear.
55:34 Griffin McElroy? And clear? How you make it clear?
55:36 Travis McElroy? Dude, I didn't, I didn't give it all away. No one expected it to be clear. It's clear. No one wanted it to be clear, Travis. Your market research has misled you. Yeah, it's, it, it also blocks radiation.
55:48 Griffin McElroy? Yeah. Teens love vibes and clear food you can see through. They eat their clear, they eat their glass burgers. They love this stuff.
55:57 Travis McElroy? Well, it started, we started it as a way to replace Plexiglas, um, and then somebody took a bite out of it. Jimmy was messing around, took a bite out of it, and said, this tastes like fish. And I said, that's weird, cause no fish was used in the making of it. It was all chemicals. And he said, I think we could sell it. And I said, okay.
56:15 Griffin McElroy? So this week, we're gonna be in Anaheim and Sacramento doing some live shows. We're gonna be doing Dadlands, our Adventure Zone original IP, uh, GM by Brendan Lee Mulligan and, uh, MBMBaM in Anaheim. And then we're gonna be doing MBMBaM in Sacramento. If you're coming to either of those Mabimbams, and you have a question, or if you're, you want read aloud, go ahead and email that to MBMBaM. That's M B M B A M at maximumfun.org and put your city in the subject line.
56:37 Travis McElroy? They're gonna kick ass.
56:38 Griffin McElroy? They're gonna kick ass. They're gonna be kick ass shows, but if you don't live in California, we got other shows that we're doing all over this country of ours. Uh, Atlanta, we're coming to Texas, we're coming to Salt Lake City, we're go, we're going all over.
56:50 Travis McElroy? Why is it okay if they don't come to the California ones to hang their heads and come to these other ones? Yeah, come to all of them. Like you would follow the Grateful Dead, man. Like, why are they picking and choosing? I am gonna be at them all. Yeah.
57:02 Griffin McElroy? You know? Okay, yeah, fair point. So Dad's also gonna be doing D and D in a castle, November 3rd to the 7th. Why do we keep promoting that? That doesn't benefit me at all. It doesn't help me whatsoever. Stop saying that.
57:12 Travis McElroy? It makes Dad happy.
57:13 Griffin McElroy? You can find ticket links and everything. So does Doc Savage Books, and they cost $3 at the store. You know what I mean? Bit.ly/MacRaeTours is where you can go to get all that, all that information.
57:25 Travis McElroy? We also have a bunch of new merch, as it's a new month, so check out the Why Not a Wizard pin, the fuck off, King! Both designed by Evan Cruz, who is What's Their Face on Instagram, that's What's with a Z. 10% of all merch proceeds this month will be donated to the Immigrant Defenders Law Center. So go check that out, macrae merch.com.
57:47 Griffin McElroy? Um, thank you to Montane for the use of our theme song, "My Life is Better With You." It's a great track. You know what else is a great track? Uh, all of the songs on Montane's newest album, "It's Hard to Be a Fish," that just came out. Uh, if you're looking for some new music to listen to and you have not checked out this album, you should do it, because it's so fun and good and cool and original and, uh, I can't, I can't stop, can't stop pumping it. Thank you, Montane. Thank you, Montane.
58:12 Travis McElroy? May I share a fear with you guys?
58:15 Griffin McElroy? Sure, sure. Yeah, please. Yeah, then we'll get back to the podcast.
58:17 Travis McElroy? Okay, thank you.
58:18 Griffin McElroy? Well, I think we'll stop when we do this. Oh, okay. Sorry. It's part of the show. I got it.
58:22 Travis McElroy? This year I will be faster than my fear that I'll spontaneously be asked to sing the Star Spangled Banner for an audience and forget all of the lyrics.
58:31 Griffin McElroy? It's relatable. My name's Justin McElroy.
58:33 Travis McElroy? I'm Travis McElroy.
58:34 Griffin McElroy? I'm Griffin McElroy. It's been my brother, my brother me. Kiss your dad, square on the lips.
59:11 Speaker 06 Maximum Fun. A worker-owned network of artist-owned shows. Supported directly by you.
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