Things To Do Before You’re 40 | And William the Undertaker

Could you imagine William as a London tour guide? Jordan as a camp counsellor? In today’s episode, the boys go through your suggestions for their alternative jobs and hear your ideas for what they need to do before they turn 40. If you want to get involved you can email us mailto: [email protected], and for more Sexted fun sign up https://sextedmyboss.com/newsletter/ to our free VIG&Diva newsletter. You can follow us and DM on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/sextedmyboss/ and TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@sextedmyboss, and watch the latest episode every Tuesday and Friday on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/c/SextedMyBoss. Help I Sexted My Boss is presented by William Hanson and Jordan North. It is an Audio Always http://www.audioalways.com production. If you want to get involved you can email us mailto: [email protected]. You can follow us and DM on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/sextedmyboss/ and TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@sextedmyboss, and watch the latest episode every Tuesday and Friday on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/c/SextedMyBoss. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy https://acast.com/privacy for more information.

• 0:01Speaker 00

  William and Jordan will be with you in just a moment, but first, here's one for your queue. Vicky Patterson has taken on a huge charity challenge, getting from Newcastle to London by kayak, bike and on foot. Now she's on her podcast Get a Grip with a proper, honest, blisters and all debrief. If you need a nudge to step outside your comfort zone, then this is the one for you. Once this episode's done, search Get a Grip and get it playing.

• 0:31Speaker 01

  Hi, it's Danny Pellegrino from Everything Iconic. 12 celebrities, one Don and cold hard cash. From the producers of The Traitors comes The Mob, a new Hulu original series. The iconic Parker Posey hosts this unique reality competition show where 12 celebrity contestants shake down in an Italian villa to win a share of up to $250,000. Watch the new Hulu original series, The Mob, premiering October 26 on Hulu and Hulu on Disney Plus for bundle subscribers. Terms apply.

• 1:06Speaker 02

  Gene Devers, before we start the episode, we have a clock now that helps to keep us on time, so we're not winter on for too long. And Ben can never get it. Right? You're right, Ben. You're right.

• 1:16Speaker 03

  Jack always gets it right.

• 1:18Speaker 02

  Yeah, Jack always gets it right. Have you got the clock started?

• 1:20Speaker 04

  Yeah, it's running now.

• 1:21Speaker 02

  Are we good? Yeah.

• 1:23Speaker 04

  It's bloody rich for you to come at someone about a clock when you're so late all the time.

• 1:32Speaker 03

  He's got a point.

• 1:34Speaker 02

  That was the crappest insult I've ever heard. That was the most middle-class Hertfordshire insult I've ever heard in my life.

• 1:41Speaker 04

  Don't bring my county into this.

• 1:43Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 1:49Speaker 02

  Hello and welcome to our Friday episode, where we see how much extra content we can squeeze into your week. Random things that have been sent in, extra bits that have been going on and how our advice went down with you, our wonderful Gene Devers. That insult reminded me of that soccer Saturday. Well, Geoff, you're a poo head, whatever he said. How are you? What are you doing this weekend?

• 2:12Speaker 03

  Well, I'll be on holiday.

• 2:13Speaker 02

  Will you be in Disney?

• 2:14Speaker 03

  I will be in Disney. I'll be wearing some Minnie Mouse ears and having a lovely time with Cinderella or something.

• 2:18Speaker 02

  Do you remember, I was going to, every time you go to Disney and I, someone-

• 2:23Speaker 03

  Are you going to quote the Disney adults thing? No? Okay, carry on.

• 2:27Speaker 02

  No, I can't actually, contractually now. So good for you. Enjoy it. And remember, if you see the Toy Story characters, don't say the words.

• 2:35Speaker 03

  Oh, Anna's coming.

• 2:38Speaker 02

  Pick me up, be back.

• 2:40Speaker 03

  Anna's gone.

• 2:41Speaker 02

  Oh, thanks. But they will drop tip for her.

• 2:43Speaker 03

  Will they? Do they actually do that in the parks? No, I can't shout there during a parade.

• 2:48Speaker 02

  They will. They will do it.

• 2:50Speaker 04

  You shut down the entire parade.

• 2:52Speaker 02

  People fall in all over each other.

• 2:55Speaker 03

  They all trip over each other and some sort of gripping float driving. No, I can't probably do this.

• 2:59Speaker 02

  Did they do a parade in the Paris one?

• 3:01Speaker 03

  You do, yes. They've got the new Princess Cavalcade. Thank you very much. Very looking forward to it.

• 3:06Speaker 02

  Just remember, it's France, it's Paris, there's a good chance it'll get cancelled. If the union have heard-

• 3:10Speaker 03

  That is not how it works.

• 3:12Speaker 02

  You know what they're like over there. No, in Saudi Arabia, 20 minutes this morning, I cannot do the parade. I must go on a four hour break.

• 3:21Speaker 03

  Disney Magic bypasses any French union rules.

• 3:24Speaker 02

  Oh, fair enough. Fair enough. Fair enough.

• 3:28Speaker 03

  No, what are you doing this weekend?

• 3:29Speaker 02

  I actually don't know. Paddle on Friday.

• 3:31Speaker 03

  Can you do paddle with your back?

• 3:33Speaker 02

  Probably not. No. Well, no, use your arm.

• 3:36Speaker 03

  No, but-

• 3:40Speaker 02

  I've got-

• 3:41Speaker 03

  Your teeth are getting whiter each week.

• 3:45Speaker 02

  Well, they?

• 3:46Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 3:47Speaker 02

  It's just because I'm tanned. I'm putting up-

• 3:49Speaker 03

  You're tanned?

• 3:50Speaker 02

  You don't miss a bloody trick. Oh, I'm using, I've got Wintor MB brace retainers.

• 3:55Speaker 03

  Oh, okay.

• 3:56Speaker 02

  I'm wearing at night, you know what I'm saying?

• 3:57Speaker 03

  It's like sitting opposite Ryler.

• 3:58Speaker 02

  Thank you. That's a great-

• 3:59Speaker 03

  Just without the shows.

• 4:00Speaker 02

  I don't know what I'm doing. Oh, I need to get a new blind for my room, so I'm going blind shopping on Friday.

• 4:05Speaker 03

  Right.

• 4:06Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 4:06Speaker 03

  Venetian, Roman, roller?

• 4:10Speaker 02

  Honestly, couldn't care less. I really don't want to be doing it, but it's got to be done, so.

• 4:14Speaker 03

  So which room? Your bedroom or?

• 4:15Speaker 02

  Yeah, I need to get a blind in.

• 4:17Speaker 03

  Okay. Well, you need to take interesting blinds because that's important.

• 4:21Speaker 02

  Only because the neighbours have said, and I quote, "It's like Notting Hill when you open curtains after your nap."

• 4:26Speaker 03

  Notting Hill?

• 4:28Speaker 02

  I've seen from Notting Hill.

• 4:29Speaker 03

  I've seen Notting Hill, but I can't remember that scene.

• 4:31Speaker 02

  He opens it in his bollock.

• 4:33Speaker 03

  Is that in Notting Hill?

• 4:34Speaker 02

  That's Notting Hill, isn't it? Yeah. I actually don't know. I've got a, I've got a, I've got a nice, fresh in weekend and then the weekend after, the sexted capital breakfast barbecue.

• 4:44Speaker 03

  Yes. Lovely. That would be very nice. How many are going to be there?

• 4:48Speaker 02

  Not worked it out yet.

• 4:50Speaker 03

  Do you need any help?

• 4:53Speaker 02

  Yes, actually I do.

• 4:55Speaker 03

  Ben needs help.

• 4:56Speaker 02

  Whilst I've got you, because it's capital breakfast and sexted, can I put the, it through as a business expense?

• 5:03Speaker 03

  Through a capital? Yeah, absolutely. Go for it.

• 5:04Speaker 02

  No, no, no, no, no. I mean through as a-

• 5:07Speaker 03

  No.

• 5:07Speaker 02

  Oh, okay. Yeah.

• 5:09Speaker 03

  It's not how it works.

• 5:10Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 5:11Speaker 03

  Because it's in your own home and it's not holding exclusively for sexted or capital.

• 5:15Speaker 02

  I'm glad I asked.

• 5:16Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 5:16Speaker 02

  I just wanted to check.

• 5:17Speaker 03

  See, I know HMRC's rules.

• 5:19Speaker 02

  Yeah, so do I. Hey, my books are clean.

• 5:21Speaker 03

  You just asked.

• 5:22Speaker 02

  My books are clean. I'm more than happy to show them. Well, I'm not. Let's move on.

• 5:27Speaker 03

  We did, we did William's, we did William's diary, let's do Jordan's tax return.

• 5:31Speaker 02

  Let's do Jordan's books. Next week.

• 5:34Speaker 03

  I bet you they are.

• 5:36Speaker 02

  Mine are good. I've got-

• 5:37Speaker 03

  No, no, no. If you've done them, they'll be like, what's the-

• 5:39Speaker 02

  I haven't done them. God, I don't do them. Christ, you're joking.

• 5:42Speaker 03

  Enumerated.

• 5:43Speaker 02

  Yeah, exactly.

• 5:43Speaker 03

  You did remember, I mean, we have talked about this before, you did once send a tax return to a PR person by accident, not your accountant. You sent it to Jacob. Can you not remember?

• 5:53Speaker 02

  Yes, I forgot about that.

• 5:54Speaker 03

  And then you had to email him going, "Don't open it."

• 5:56Speaker 02

  It wasn't, was it a tax return or an invoice?

• 5:58Speaker 03

  Tax return.

• 5:59Speaker 02

  Was it?

• 6:00Speaker 03

  He's still, every time I see him, we still talk about it.

• 6:02Speaker 02

  Oh, for God's sake.

• 6:03Speaker 03

  It's very funny.

• 6:04Speaker 02

  Did he open it? I hope he's deleted it.

• 6:06Speaker 03

  He says no. Had a good laugh.

• 6:08Speaker 02

  I bet, yeah. I mean, a good laugh.

• 6:10Speaker 03

  We were chatting about different jobs that radio presenters could have a few episodes back, and we wondered what jobs that we could do. So of course we asked for suggestions from the Gene Devers. Phoebe said Jordan could be a pool aerobics instructor for all the northern mums on holiday.

• 6:24Speaker 02

  Do you know, I feel like, oh, Gene Devers knows me so well.

• 6:27Speaker 03

  You'd love it.

• 6:28Speaker 02

  And that is now that I'd absolutely love that. There's a series on Channel 5 called Bargain Loving Brits in the Sun, and there's a guy from Scamsdale who's, who does that with old ladies. And he looks so happy. Yeah. I'd love that.

• 6:42Speaker 03

  Not with your back in the condition it is now, but once it's recovered.

• 6:46Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 6:46Speaker 03

  Rachel thinks that I'd be a very good passive aggressive cabin crew, obviously in first class.

• 6:50Speaker 02

  Oh, you would. And you'd be one of those cabin crews, apparently a lot do. They hate not doing first class.

• 6:57Speaker 03

  Yeah, well, when they are first class and then they're made to do else, yeah.

• 7:00Speaker 02

  But no, you're not first class, from what I gather, exclusively.

• 7:04Speaker 03

  Depends which airline.

• 7:05Speaker 02

  No, you're not.

• 7:05Speaker 03

  Some are.

• 7:06Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah?

• 7:07Speaker 03

  Depends on what contract they're on.

• 7:08Speaker 02

  Oh, okay.

• 7:09Speaker 03

  Various airlines changed contracts fairly recently. Becca said Jordan would make a great spin teacher. He's got the good vibes and energy.

• 7:16Speaker 02

  A lot of people thinking this, aren't they?

• 7:17Speaker 03

  No, you'd get bored, you'd get distracted.

• 7:19Speaker 02

  Come on, girls.

• 7:20Speaker 03

  You'd get distracted halfway through.

• 7:21Speaker 02

  I need a hero. Calling up for a hero.

• 7:25Speaker 03

  You'd suddenly take your phone out and stop spinning and everyone in the class would just stop.

• 7:28Speaker 02

  I wouldn't, because I'm liking this.

• 7:31Speaker 03

  This is odd. Tynan said that I can see William as an undertaker.

• 7:34Speaker 02

  Face for it. Yeah.

• 7:37Speaker 03

  I've been confused with the corpse.

• 7:38Speaker 02

  No, no, no, yeah. Face for it. A very sad looking face.

• 7:43Speaker 03

  That's just sitting opposite you.

• 7:45Speaker 02

  You would be a good undertaker.

• 7:47Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 7:47Speaker 02

  Get, you get. I'm thinking of Rodney and Fools and Horses.

• 7:50Speaker 03

  Jenna said Jordan would be great working in a staff canteen, giving out meatballs and sausages.

• 7:55Speaker 02

  I mean, again, I would love that.

• 7:57Speaker 03

  I can see you in a hairnet.

• 7:59Speaker 02

  Hmm.

• 7:59Speaker 03

  And an apron.

• 8:00Speaker 04

  Maybe he should wear a hairnet every week with that do.

• 8:04Speaker 03

  Yes, the mullet is mulletting.

• 8:06Speaker 02

  Right. What is up with you and your shit insults this week with that do? Christ.

• 8:12Speaker 03

  You do look a bit-

• 8:13Speaker 02

  It's like arguing with little Lord Fontal, Roy. What's going on here?

• 8:16Speaker 03

  Michaela or Michaelia said, suggested I work as a London tour guide. Queues for an Insta phone box pick at Westminster Common. Oh, I see. That's what I'd be saying. Claire thinks I'd work on a fragrance concession in a high-end department store.

• 8:30Speaker 02

  Why do you say that?

• 8:32Speaker 03

  Frankie, which high-end department store?

• 8:34Speaker 02

  Debenhams.

• 8:36Speaker 03

  Frankie said, I said nothing. Frankie said I-

• 8:40Speaker 02

  Sometimes you're not up there.

• 8:40Speaker 03

  No. Frankie said I can picture Jordan as a camp counsellor.

• 8:46Speaker 03

  Obviously, that's someone working at a summer camp, nothing else.

• 8:49Speaker 02

  That's a camp councillor. And how does that let you feel? Oh, the bitch. Is that what she said?

• 8:55Speaker 03

  Wendy's back.

• 8:57Speaker 02

  Oh, I would have done exactly the same thing. What you've got to ask yourself is, why did you slash the tyres on his car? I would be good at that.

• 9:07Speaker 03

  You would, basically doing it now. Will said we could get jobs on Micah's building site. And finally-

• 9:13Speaker 02

  Been there, done that.

• 9:14Speaker 03

  Yeah, well, for a few weeks until you decided you wanted to do the art.

• 9:17Speaker 02

  A lot of people haven't forgotten this. It was eighteen months.

• 9:20Speaker 04

  Now you're blowing.

• 9:22Speaker 02

  It was.

• 9:22Speaker 04

  I know.

• 9:23Speaker 02

  It was in, because at high school, certain kids went out and did trades, and that was me.

• 9:30Speaker 03

  You've done a lot of trade. And Alex thinks Jordan could run a pub and I could run the country. I could run this country. I'd run it very well.

• 9:38Speaker 02

  Do you think?

• 9:39Speaker 03

  Oh, yes.

• 9:40Speaker 02

  At the time of recording, Andy Burnham is the Prime Minister.

• 9:43Speaker 03

  Yeah, for now.

• 9:44Speaker 02

  For now. So we don't know what's happening, uh, next. I would run a good pub. I'm too indecisive to run a country.

• 9:52Speaker 03

  Yes. Yeah, I can't, I can't see you at the G7.

• 9:55Speaker 02

  I'd be there at a cabinet meeting and I'd be like, yeah, right. No, we'll do that. Yeah, we'll cut taxes, eh? And we'll, we'll tax the super, super rich. The super, super, yeah, those billionaires are all avoiding it. Yeah.

• 10:08Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 10:09Speaker 02

  And then I'd go out and I'd be like, hang on.

• 10:13Speaker 02

  It's not the right thing to do, actually.

• 10:14Speaker 03

  Yeah, you'd make a decision and then vacillate.

• 10:16Speaker 02

  Yeah. What's that mean?

• 10:18Speaker 03

  Then, just exactly as you described. Now, Jordan-

• 10:21Speaker 02

  What do you think of number ten B?

• 10:24Speaker 03

  Number what?

• 10:25Speaker 02

  Number ten in Manchester.

• 10:26Speaker 03

  Do you know, I, I'm going to be completely honest with you. I haven't read a newspaper. I don't know. I mean, I don't know what's going on.

• 10:32Speaker 02

  I know you're going on, but basically it's number ten in Manchester now.

• 10:34Speaker 03

  Is there?

• 10:35Speaker 02

  Yeah, Andy Burnham's set up like a number ten Downing Street in Manchester.

• 10:38Speaker 03

  I thought you said number ten B as in the sort of the port.

• 10:41Speaker 02

  Ten B, I thought they're calling it, aren't they?

• 10:43Speaker 03

  A place in Devon or in Dorset. Okay.

• 10:46Speaker 02

  We get it, Andy. You're Norvan. Don't make it your personality.

• 10:50Speaker 03

  Right? There's already someone that's done that.

• 10:52Speaker 02

  Honestly, there's more to being, there's more to, more to you than being Norvan, honestly. Don't make it your whole entire shtick. People will get bored of it very quick. You're more than that, Andy.

• 11:05Speaker 03

  Well, there are so many problems in this country, and the fact that we didn't have a number ten in Manchester is absolutely top of the list. You've had a little hungover panic about being forty for the next World Cup. It's four years away, so you've had plenty of time to make the most of your thirties. So we asked Geendivas what you should do or learn before they're forty, Jordan.

• 11:25Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm. And these are from our over forty Geendivas, I see.

• 11:28Speaker 03

  Presumably, yes. So you've got four years to get on with this. Declan said people should learn the opening line to the podcast they've been doing for eight years.

• 11:35Speaker 02

  Hello and welcome to Help Us, That's My Boss, the podcast where we help you navigate the challenges of modern day life.

• 11:42Speaker 03

  Do the next one, answering.

• 11:44Speaker 02

  Answering your twenty first century questions and finding solutions to those every day, dilemmas like.

• 11:48Speaker 03

  You see, you can do it. So why do we have to give you an auto cue?

• 11:52Speaker 02

  Or, or, or what should you do if you accidentally texted your boss? But we're not usually going to answer. We're William Hanson, the UK's leading etiquette expert.

• 11:59Speaker 03

  Very good.

• 12:00Speaker 02

  Thank you.

• 12:01Speaker 03

  So Declan, there we go.

• 12:02Speaker 02

  Oh, yours, Declan.

• 12:04Speaker 03

  Sarah said everyone should learn to fold a fitted sheet properly, which was a suggestion from quite a few people.

• 12:09Speaker 02

  What do you mean, fold a fitted sheet?

• 12:11Speaker 03

  You know, the fitted sheet with the elastic that you put on the sort of the bed, like a flat sheet.

• 12:15Speaker 02

  Many of mine's pinged up and shot me in the eye.

• 12:18Speaker 03

  And the fitted sheet.

• 12:20Speaker 02

  I know.

• 12:21Speaker 03

  Um, yes, well, yeah, I, I, well, I can do that, so I don't need to learn that. Keith suggested trying a new kink.

• 12:27Speaker 02

  Tried piss on holiday. It weren't for me.

• 12:29Speaker 03

  Jordan.

• 12:29Speaker 02

  I'm joking, I'm joking.

• 12:32Speaker 03

  Please. Tom said-

• 12:35Speaker 02

  Try a new kink. I don't know, you want to be, each, yeah, okay.

• 12:38Speaker 03

  Tom said get something pierced.

• 12:40Speaker 04

  That's a new kink.

• 12:41Speaker 02

  I am thinking-

• 12:43Speaker 03

  Oh, no.

• 12:43Speaker 02

  Of getting a tattoo.

• 12:45Speaker 03

  Another one.

• 12:46Speaker 02

  I've only got one. This fritto el momento.

• 12:49Speaker 03

  Where are you going to get this from?

• 12:50Speaker 02

  I don't have any other tattoos.

• 12:51Speaker 03

  Don't get it.

• 12:51Speaker 02

  And bearing in mind, out of everyone in my family and all my brothers, I don't have a tattoo, really. I've got a tiny one on the back of my, like, Achilles. Thinking of getting one there.

• 13:01Speaker 03

  Oh, saying what?

• 13:03Speaker 04

  On the back of his bicep, his tricep.

• 13:06Speaker 02

  Popping out.

• 13:06Speaker 03

  Saying what?

• 13:07Speaker 02

  I actually seen a lad on holiday, everyone, and I was, I don't know, maybe like a sun or something.

• 13:12Speaker 03

  Right, okay. I know nothing about tattoos, but don't, don't get one because you, oh, I might get, you've got to, you've got to presumably know exactly what.

• 13:20Speaker 02

  Get one there.

• 13:21Speaker 03

  Stop, Jordan, I know exactly what you're doing, you little thirsty little bitch.

• 13:25Speaker 02

  I'm not doing anything.

• 13:25Speaker 03

  Yes, you are. Oh, look at my muscle.

• 13:27Speaker 02

  So I might get one there popping out. I don't know, I've not decided.

• 13:30Speaker 03

  Where are you going to get it again?

• 13:34Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 13:35Speaker 04

  That is looking pretty good, though.

• 13:39Speaker 04

  Surprising that sort of, all that time you spend flicking through your phone in the gym is actually doing something.

• 13:44Speaker 03

  Just show me that one on that arm. It's not as big.

• 13:49Speaker 02

  No, it's not, actually.

• 13:49Speaker 03

  No. Um, Jamie suggested learning a new language and running a marathon.

• 13:55Speaker 02

  Both of which I want to do.

• 13:57Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 13:58Speaker 02

  Do I declare that here?

• 14:00Speaker 03

  What?

• 14:00Speaker 02

  I'll do one of them before I'm forty.

• 14:02Speaker 03

  Which do we think it's going to be, Ben? Between marathon and learning a new language?

• 14:06Speaker 04

  Half marathon, half a language.

• 14:08Speaker 02

  Charito. Spanish.

• 14:12Speaker 03

  I think you'll do a marathon. I don't think you'll do a language.

• 14:15Speaker 02

  Is it hard doing a marathon?

• 14:17Speaker 04

  Harder, harder to do a language.

• 14:19Speaker 02

  Is it?

• 14:20Speaker 04

  I reckon.

• 14:21Speaker 02

  Which is going to, which is going to be quicker to do?

• 14:23Speaker 04

  Marathon.

• 14:24Speaker 02

  I'll do a marathon.

• 14:25Speaker 03

  Andy said make fresh pasta.

• 14:27Speaker 02

  Oh, could you be arsed, Andy? Could you, you can get, honestly, honestly, and I, I know all Italians will be kicking off and throwing their hands up and everything.

• 14:38Speaker 02

  Just, you can get really nice pasta from supermarket like.

• 14:41Speaker 03

  You can go to, or go to a deli and buy it fresh, make someone else do it. Anthony said everyone should master a signature dish such as corned beef hash. You're still trying.

• 14:49Speaker 02

  Excuse me? It's fine.

• 14:51Speaker 03

  Enika said it would be funny to see Jordan ride a horse, nothing to do with turning forty, just for shits and giggles.

• 14:57Speaker 02

  Done it. Again, going back to the tattoos for the same TV series, me and Beverly Callard.

• 15:01Speaker 03

  Yes, of course you did.

• 15:02Speaker 02

  I rode a horse through a vineyard in Spain.

• 15:05Speaker 03

  Lovely.

• 15:05Speaker 02

  Best ever TV show, I did that. I often think about-

• 15:08Speaker 03

  Than Saturday Kitchen?

• 15:10Speaker 02

  I loved, yeah, I was a guest on that.

• 15:12Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 15:12Speaker 02

  But it was, we travelled from top of Spain to bottom, and I often think about it and think, that was the best month for my, one of the best months of my life. Just drinking wine every night and, and filming. You're class.

• 15:23Speaker 04

  Well, I looked, um, at my Instagram the other day and saw that it was basically just over a year since we were in Malta, which is probably my favourite ever sexed thing we've done, so linked.

• 15:34Speaker 02

  Well, cheers, because I was working.

• 15:37Speaker 03

  You were off it.

• 15:38Speaker 04

  Oh, sorry, Jordan, you weren't there, sorry.

• 15:40Speaker 02

  One of us had to work.

• 15:43Speaker 03

  Well, we were, what do you think we were doing? We were working. I mean, we had a lovely time, but we were working.

• 15:49Speaker 02

  Call that work.

• 15:50Speaker 03

  Amy is thirty seven and has put together a list-

• 15:52Speaker 02

  I'm so petty, I've still not listened back to that episode. I can't bring myself to it.

• 15:57Speaker 03

  Amy is thirty seven and has put together a list of forty things to do before they're forty, and the list includes some ideas from childhood, like growing a sunflower, oh, we've got two growing at the moment. Things they've not tried before, like taking a solo trip abroad.

• 16:08Speaker 02

  I'd like to do that.

• 16:09Speaker 03

  And things to do with family and line dancing with their gran. Uh, Amy said it makes you forget you're turning forty and makes life a bit of an adventure. And then asked what would be on our list.

• 16:21Speaker 02

  I, I like the idea of a list, but I'm just, as I'm getting older, I just want to go and watch telly. So it'd be like, oh, you've, you've got that line, don't forget, you've got that line dancing class today. I can't be arsed.

• 16:35Speaker 03

  Hmm, I couldn't be bothered with line dancing.

• 16:37Speaker 02

  Paddle, that's what I think. I want to do, yeah, maybe something I could do before I'm forty.

• 16:43Speaker 03

  Hmm.

• 16:45Speaker 02

  What could I do? I'm not, I'm not, I'm not parachuting or bungee jumping.

• 16:49Speaker 03

  Oh, no.

• 16:50Speaker 02

  God, no.

• 16:50Speaker 03

  No. That, because it's bound, and with you, it was bound to go wrong.

• 16:54Speaker 02

  I say it all the, all the time to the capital guys. I'm like, when they're coming up with new ideas and stuff and, got new, I'm like, no parachutes, no bungee jumps and no snakes. Those are my rules. I'm not doing snakes.

• 17:06Speaker 03

  I'd like to learn to tap dance.

• 17:08Speaker 02

  I can imagine you as a bit of a tap dancer.

• 17:10Speaker 03

  I actually would quite like to learn to tap dance.

• 17:12Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm.

• 17:13Speaker 03

  Um, and I'd also, and I'm going to do this in a few weeks' time, once I have some holes drilled into the bottom of a stainless, or aluminium planter I've got in the garden, I'm going to grow my own potatoes. It's very easy to do.

• 17:24Speaker 02

  But will you boil them afterwards?

• 17:27Speaker 03

  I'll do also. If you're coming around, yes.

• 17:29Speaker 02

  I think honestly boiled potatoes are so underrated. I really do.

• 17:33Speaker 03

  Um, finally, lots of people said, uh, to get over it, there's nothing wrong with turning forty, and lots of people have found their forties are when they can stop caring what other people think.

• 17:40Speaker 02

  Not that I read the comments, but that wasn't the point of me having a breakdown. It was just the fact that I'm going to be forty for the next World Cup, and I don't think I personally can wear a football shirt when you're forty. That's what I was saying. My personal opinion.

• 17:55Speaker 03

  Your opinion.

• 17:56Speaker 02

  There'll be more of your listeners' responses and questions and whatever else we do, next.

• 18:03Speaker 01

  Hi, it's Danny Pellegrino from Everything Iconic. Twelve celebrities, one Don and cold hard cash. From the producers of The Traitors comes The Mob, a new Hulu original series. The iconic Parker Posey hosts this unique reality competition show where twelve celebrity contestants shake down in an Italian villa to win a share of up to two hundred and fifty thousand dollars. Watch the new Hulu original series, The Mob, premiering October twenty sixth on Hulu and Hulu on Disney Plus for bundle subscribers. Terms apply.

• 18:39Speaker 03

  Welcome back, G and Evers. Louise has messaged in to notify me that I've been mentioned in a book. The book is called Good For You by Lucy Vine, and here is the extract where I'm mentioned. He nods and my stomach rumbles quietly. It's after lunch. Is it inconsiderate to suggest we get something to eat for ourselves, too? What's the etiquette for when you're driving your therapist to his mum's house during a medical emergency, but you're starving because you only had three spoonfuls of tiramisu for breakfast, since it's the only food in the house? It's probably too niche an example for William Hanson to have covered in his etiquette books, but I'm guessing it would be frowned upon. You're not really allowed an appetite in times of crisis. Well, there we go.

• 19:16Speaker 02

  Wow, you're mentioned in a novel!

• 19:17Speaker 03

  I'm mentioned in a novel. That's very kind of you, Lucy Vine, and thank you, Louise, for sending that in.

• 19:22Speaker 02

  Just to be the lovely best friend I am to keep your feet on the ground. At the time of recording, I interviewed Ricky Gervais today, and he didn't have a clue who you were.

• 19:30Speaker 03

  Well, that's fine.

• 19:31Speaker 02

  So, yeah, just...

• 19:32Speaker 03

  Okay, thank you so much.

• 19:33Speaker 02

  Keep your feet on the ground.

• 19:33Speaker 03

  No, that's, that's fine. Thank you.

• 19:36Speaker 02

  It's what friends are for.

• 19:37Speaker 03

  It is what friends are for. It is what friends are for.

• 19:40Speaker 02

  But great that you mentioned...

• 19:41Speaker 03

  And I find The Office boring. Once you've seen one episode, you've seen them all.

• 19:44Speaker 02

  Well, that's not, because it's probably the best British sitcom ever made.

• 19:46Speaker 03

  I think the American one's better.

• 19:50Speaker 02

  People do say that.

• 19:51Speaker 03

  Thank you very much. I mean, it's a totally different style of comedy, I would also, just to be fair.

• 19:55Speaker 02

  Hear me out. I decided this on the way over here today. My favourite ever guest.

• 20:00Speaker 03

  Ricky Gervais?

• 20:01Speaker 02

  Genuinely. Out of all the people I've interviewed, and I'm very lucky and I love my job.

• 20:05Speaker 03

  Who was the actor you did?

• 20:06Speaker 02

  Robert De Niro. Yeah. Taylor Swift, Harry Styles, he's my fa- I just, he's a nice bloke.

• 20:12Speaker 03

  Did he come in?

• 20:12Speaker 02

  He came in. He's so lovely, he's so unassuming, and really funny. And afterwards, always sticks around as a, like, as a proper laugh with everyone. Like, genuinely, like belly laugh. I can't sp- I know he's not everyone's cup of tea, but I've loved him since a kid. And I was, on the way over, thought, do you know what? Twice he's been on the show now, and he's my favourite ever guest.

• 20:30Speaker 03

  Oh, well, that's nice. I'm sure he'll come back.

• 20:32Speaker 02

  And that's why we were chatting about you, and I went, I'm sorry, I'm going to have to rush, I've got a podcast.

• 20:36Speaker 03

  Well, thank you for being professional.

• 20:38Speaker 02

  But he said he's not really, he doesn't listen to pods, and he's not, he doesn't read papers and stuff.

• 20:42Speaker 03

  Do you know, I will, I will find a way to get over it.

• 20:45Speaker 02

  Okay, good.

• 20:46Speaker 03

  Gary has messaged from his honeymoon. Dear William, Jordan, producer Ben and Izzy, I've been a loyal, self-respecting G and Evers since day one, though I briefly lost my way and fell off the wagon during the Covid era.

• 20:56Speaker 02

  I think that's when we peaked. I think some of the, some of the...

• 20:59Speaker 03

  It's when you left us, Gary.

• 21:01Speaker 02

  Genuinely, in Covid, I've heard a few episodes, not that long ago, and I was like, oh, God, we might have been on Zoom, but...

• 21:08Speaker 03

  Yeah. When I started my new job as a postman back in 2024, I decided to power through three full years of back catalogue episodes on my delivery round. Having you all in my ears every Tuesday and Friday makes walking miles all year round much better. Come heatwave or pouring infinitely more bearable, even if I do look like a total lunatic howling with laughter while trying to post someone's junk mail. And don't worry, William, I always ensure the stamps are facing the correct way up. It's been great keeping up with everything lately, from Jordan playing at Soccer Aid, though as a massive football fan, it pains me deeply to even say the word soccer, and voicing a garden gnome in Toy Story 5, to William treading the boards on the Titanique show, though, William, you really need to be doing the run somewhere properly up north. Well, I'm afraid the West

• 21:53Speaker 03

  End is in the West End, I can't do much about that. And of course, relying on Izzy to keep you all updated as the show's resident Gen Z expert. Life's been a bit of a whirlwind on my end, too. After 10 fantastic years together, I finally made an honest woman of my wonderful wife, Danielle. I'm actually writing this while on honeymoon, raising a proper gin and a bar to you all, though I'm being careful not to spill a drop on my shirt. Thank you for keeping me company on the streets and providing the absolute best distraction on my round. Yours, etiquette fully, Gary.

• 22:19Speaker 02

  What a lovely message, Gary.

• 22:20Speaker 03

  That's very nice. Thank you, and I hope you're having a lovely honeymoon.

• 22:22Speaker 02

  Great job being a postman as well. Beats walking the streets all day.

• 22:29Speaker 03

  Good.

• 22:29Speaker 02

  You like that one?

• 22:29Speaker 03

  Yes, nice.

• 22:30Speaker 02

  Nice one, Gary. That was a lovely letter. Thanks, buddy.

• 22:32Speaker 03

  Carl has written in with a bit of Irish funeral etiquette. Hello, William and Jordan.

• 22:37Speaker 02

  And when it comes to funerals, the Irish. Now, I don't care what you etiquette experts think, you know, when it comes to funerals, the Irish know. That's all I'm going to say. Give me an Irish send-off. Open casket, la la. Guinness.

• 22:52Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 22:52Speaker 02

  I want, I want, I want my coffin in your living room, on that horrible-looking sofa, where people can come round and have a look.

• 22:59Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 23:00Speaker 02

  That's what I want. Open casket. I'm not even Catholic, but go on.

• 23:03Speaker 03

  Okay. After your discussion about the etiquette of overtaking a hearse carrying a coffin in a previous episode, I thought I'd share a bit of Irish folklore. In Ireland, it's generally considered respectful not to overtake a hearse while it's carrying a coffin. While it's more a matter of tradition and respect than law, many people will wait until the hearse has reached its destination before passing. One of the most famous stories linked to this is the legendary Curse of Mayo. The story that after Mayo won the 1951 All-Ireland Football Championship, the team allegedly overtook, or otherwise showed disrespect to, a funeral procession on their journey home.

• 23:36Speaker 02

  Day one, last weekend as well. Oh, sorry, carry on.

• 23:39Speaker 03

  According to the legend, an angry priest declared that Mayo would not win another All-Ireland until every member of that 1951 team had passed away. Whether it's true or just great folklore, Mayo went 75 years without another All-Ireland title. In a remarkable twist, the last surviving member of the 1951 team passed away a few years ago, and today, at time of his writing, Mayo won their first All-Ireland since 1951.

• 24:02Speaker 02

  No way!

• 24:03Speaker 03

  So, if nothing else, it's a...

• 24:05Speaker 02

  Got tingles.

• 24:06Speaker 03

  Yes. It's a good reason not to risk overtaking a hearse in Ireland. We also have several other traditions in relation to wakes and funerals. For example, do you know why a wake is called a wake? It's a period of time to ensure the person did not wake up, that they were actually dead. Mirrors in the room with a coffin should be covered with a cloth, clock should be stopped, and there are several, several more.

• 24:27Speaker 02

  Curtains closed as well.

• 24:28Speaker 03

  Love the show. Carl.

• 24:29Speaker 02

  When my grandad died on, on Marseilles, I haven't closed the curtains.

• 24:33Speaker 03

  Oh, well, there we go. Well, that's lovely.

• 24:35Speaker 02

  Well, that's given me another bloody superstition to add to the list.

• 24:38Speaker 03

  What, closing?

• 24:39Speaker 02

  Don't overtake a hearse.

• 24:41Speaker 03

  I mean, it's not, it's not something you'll put in a position every day.

• 24:44Speaker 02

  That, and don't wash, do any washing on New Year's Day.

• 24:46Speaker 03

  New Year's Day, because you'll wash someone out of your life, yeah. Carolina in Vietnam has a question regarding some mixed messaging she's been hearing. Dear William, Jordan, EPB and the rest of the Sexted crew, I have a question for William. I recently watched William on the Bottoms Up podcast with Alan Carr and Lee Peart, and am a little confused. On an episode of Sexted, William stated that the colour of our socks should be an extension of the shoe. Yet, in his appearance on Bottoms Up, he chose to wear socks in a colour that can only be described as a flesh colour or beige, they were pink, despite wearing chocolate brown loafers. So, my question is this, is there a different rule for different types of shoe? When, if ever, is it acceptable to wear flesh-coloured socks? Kind regards, Carolina.

• 25:26Speaker 02

  Okay, first things first. Love it when he called William out on his faux pas.

• 25:29Speaker 03

  I'm not, it wasn't a faux pas, so it's fine.

• 25:31Speaker 02

  Second thing, it was pink on camera, so it's not their fault how they see it.

• 25:36Speaker 03

  What do you mean?

• 25:37Speaker 02

  The sock, you're saying it was...

• 25:39Speaker 03

  Was pink. I was in a, I was in a green linen suit and a brown loafer. So, in that instance, it's very hard to find sagey green socks. And in that, you would do a contrasting. Today, I'm in some cream action...

• 25:55Speaker 03

  I'm in some cream action slacks. I've got a brown suede loafer on, and I've got a sort of a, a patterned blue sock. It's normally with a formal suit, such as dark grey, dark navy, that the, the sock would match.

• 26:09Speaker 02

  Sure, you etiquette experts, make it up as you go along.

• 26:13Speaker 03

  I'm, Joe is nodding at me, so I knew Joe was nodding at me.

• 26:16Speaker 02

  William's colleagues in for the record today, Joe. And yes, she's nodding along.

• 26:21Speaker 03

  So, yes, Carolina, good spot, but there are always exceptions to the rule. And that's one of them.

• 26:27Speaker 02

  There's always an exception.

• 26:30Speaker 03

  You're exceptional. And finally, Sue from Lincoln has a question regarding pearl necklaces. One for you. Dear William, I just wanted to congratulate you on your absolutely wonderful performance in Titanique.

• 26:41Speaker 02

  It was wonderful.

• 26:42Speaker 03

  You looked entirely at home on the West End stage, although I'm not sure whether to applaud your comic timing, your impeccable diction, or your commitment to accessorising.

• 26:49Speaker 02

  All right, climb out.

• 26:51Speaker 03

  One question has been, that's quite funny. One question has been occupying my mind ever since the curtain came down. Do you get to keep the pearl necklace? It seemed to suit you rather well, and I'd hate to think it was destined to be returned to props. Though perhaps in the interest of good etiquette, one should never ask a gentleman what becomes of his pearls after an evening's performance. Thank you for such a gloriously...

• 27:11Speaker 02

  That's really made me laugh, Sue. Pleasure.

• 27:13Speaker 03

  Thank you for such a gloriously entertaining show. It was every bit as fabulous as I'd hoped, and you were a genuine highlight. Wishing you every success for the rest of the run. It's over. With warmest congratulations, Sue from Lincoln. Well, that's nice. No, I don't keep anything.

• 27:26Speaker 02

  Was it costume jewellery, I take it?

• 27:28Speaker 03

  It was. Do you know where they were from? You'll be happy.

• 27:31Speaker 02

  Go on, M&S.

• 27:32Speaker 03

  Correct.

• 27:33Speaker 02

  Were they actually?

• 27:34Speaker 03

  I don't buy them, I don't buy costumes, David and Mikey and Costumes buy them.

• 27:39Speaker 02

  Tell them if they want to offer M&S. Oh, I actually can't, just give up, man.

• 27:42Speaker 03

  No, you can't do that, no. No, there's a budget for costumes.

• 27:45Speaker 02

  Oh, okay.

• 27:46Speaker 03

  And actually, in the script, the first, you know, when you do, I do my fair, fair, and you have previously imitated that.

• 27:54Speaker 02

  God, it's like being there.

• 27:55Speaker 03

  Yeah, thank you. The first fair is, I'll tell you what's not fair. Are these pearls from TK Maxx? And I was like, I, that's very funny, so I'm going to change that. So, I changed it to my accent one.

• 28:06Speaker 02

  Oh, what was your line?

• 28:08Speaker 03

  Hiring someone who speaks the King's English and making them do the whole damn show in a questionable American accent. Brought the house down most nights.

• 28:15Speaker 02

  Well, I think the TK Maxx is a good line.

• 28:18Speaker 03

  Yeah, but everyone does the TK Maxx line. I wanted to make it my own.

• 28:21Speaker 02

  I'm joking, because it's very funny.

• 28:22Speaker 03

  Thank you very much.

• 28:24Speaker 02

  Right, it's now time to finish with our comment of the week.

• 28:27Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 28:27Speaker 02

  This can be a comment from Spotify, YouTube, or any of our socials.

• 28:31Speaker 03

  Here are the honourable mentions. Zander commented on Spotify on one of our recent Friday episodes to say, this episode was so country, it's great. Thank you. I said that Mikey had messaged me about how well I fold towels. So, the giant Sardine commented on Spotify, now I desperately need to know how William is folding his towels.

• 28:49Speaker 02

  How'd you fold a towel?

• 28:50Speaker 03

  Maybe I'll bring a towel in. I'll do a little demo.

• 28:52Speaker 02

  Do a demo. Well, you could do that for etiquette etymology.

• 28:54Speaker 03

  No, that's not an etiquette etymology.

• 28:56Speaker 02

  That's exactly what an etiquette etymology is. It's etiquette. Yours has turned into a history lesson.

• 29:02Speaker 03

  Do you know what an etymology is?

• 29:03Speaker 02

  No.

• 29:04Speaker 03

  Right, well, there we go. And it's the derivation of something is why we, why we get there. So, etiquette etymology is the derivation.

• 29:10Speaker 02

  You folding towels should be your next etiquette etymology.

• 29:13Speaker 03

  Well, that's going to work really well on an audio podcast, isn't it?

• 29:15Speaker 02

  Well, then I'll describe it.

• 29:18Speaker 03

  Okay. And our comment of the week goes to Somali, who commented on YouTube, William and Jordan are true examples of birth order. William is a proper big brother, slightly uptight, who winds up the little brother, but also gets momentarily annoyed himself. Jordan radiates middle child energy.

• 29:35Speaker 02

  I'm a middle child.

• 29:36Speaker 03

  Well, can you be a middle child when you're, there are four of you?

• 29:39Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 29:40Speaker 03

  Well, there's no middle.

• 29:41Speaker 02

  Me and our doms.

• 29:43Speaker 03

  Okay, you share that, I guess.

• 29:44Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 29:45Speaker 03

  Well, there we go. Thank you for all those lovely comments, and what a lovely Friday episode.

• 29:49Speaker 02

  Remember, you can listen to new episodes every Tuesday and Friday, and 24 hours before anywhere else on Global Player, if you want to get in touch about something that isn't a dilemma or a problem, drop into our DMs, or send us an email to [email protected]. We also love hearing back from people we offer advice to. So, if that's you, get back in touch, and we'll see you on Tuesday. Goodbye.

• 30:14Speaker 01

  Hi, it's Danny Pellegrino from Everything Iconic. 12 celebrities, one Don, and cold hard cash. From the producers of The Traitors comes The Mob, a new Hulu original series. The iconic Parker Posey hosts this unique reality competition show where 12 celebrity contestants shake down in an Italian villa to win a share of up to $250,000. Watch the new Hulu original series, The Mob, premiering October 26 on Hulu and Hulu on Disney Plus for bundle subscribers. Terms apply.