Ant Causes a Bottleneck & Dec’s a Padel Guy

Ant & Dec are hanging out in Blackpool for the BGT auditions, and they’re taking YOU along for the ride! Discover what makes a great audience member, watch the boys become FUN judges and rate your impressions at home…and exactly how has Ant caused a bottleneck on a flight? Plus, Dec shows off his yoga moves, Ant teaches us how to blow our noses properly, and we hear from none other than the fabulous Amanda Holden! As always, keep your correspondence coming to [email protected]. Sign off your email with the name you’d like us to use. If you’d rather we didn’t mention your surname, simply leave it out. And if you’d like a full-name shout-out, throw the whole thing in there! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Speaker 00

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• 0:31Speaker 01

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• 1:00Ant McPartlin?

  Coming up on the show, we discover why I caused a bottleneck on a plane.

• 1:04Declan Donnelly?

  I've become a paddle maniac.

• 1:07Ant McPartlin?

  I teach Deck how you blow your nose.

• 1:10Declan Donnelly?

  Find out why we'll never be Britain's Got Talent judges.

• 1:13Ant McPartlin?

  Never say never. We've been honoured some of your impressions.

• 1:16Declan Donnelly?

  And have I discovered a new relation. Hmm. Enjoy the show.

• 1:38Ant McPartlin?

  Welcome.

• 1:40Declan Donnelly?

  Hi, everyone. Welcome to our hangout for today.

• 1:45Ant McPartlin?

  Welcome to hanging out on tour.

• 1:47Declan Donnelly?

  Hanging out with me and him one more time. We are in the grand surroundings of what can only be described as a castle.

• 1:57Ant McPartlin?

  It's great, isn't it?

• 1:58Declan Donnelly?

  Feels like a castle, doesn't it?

• 2:00Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, I think that's exactly what they want it to look like.

• 2:02Declan Donnelly?

  It's a palatial room here at the Winter Gardens.

• 2:05Ant McPartlin?

  Palatial, good word.

• 2:06Declan Donnelly?

  Thank you.

• 2:06Ant McPartlin?

  Good word.

• 2:07Declan Donnelly?

  Where we are doing the Britain's Got Talent auditions at the moment. So we have commandeered this room for the podcast. We hope you like it. If you're just listening, see if you can.

• 2:19Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, try and get a clip of it somewhere. It's very good.

• 2:21Declan Donnelly?

  It's very grand. We're here on two thrones. Yours is slightly bigger than mine.

• 2:26Ant McPartlin?

  Well, yeah, actual size, isn't it? Fits the user.

• 2:30Declan Donnelly?

  And you've got a plaque on the back of yours.

• 2:32Ant McPartlin?

  I've got my family crest on there.

• 2:33Declan Donnelly?

  Is that your Court of Arms?

• 2:34Ant McPartlin?

  That's my parliament court of arms. It's not actually, but I would like the Court of Arms. But you can make your own.

• 2:40Declan Donnelly?

  You can just change it.

• 2:41Ant McPartlin?

  I can just change it around now. I might do that. How are you?

• 2:44Declan Donnelly?

  I'm good. I'm good. We are in the middle of Britain's Got Talent auditions.

• 2:47Ant McPartlin?

  We are.

• 2:48Declan Donnelly?

  We've done a few days already. We've got a few days still to go. It's been good so far, hasn't it?

• 2:52Ant McPartlin?

  It's been very good. We didn't give anything away.

• 2:55Declan Donnelly?

  Not much. We can give away a little bit.

• 2:57Speaker 04

  Have you pressed your golden buzzer?

• 2:59Declan Donnelly?

  We haven't pressed our golden buzzer yet.

• 3:00Ant McPartlin?

  No, we haven't.

• 3:00Declan Donnelly?

  We nearly have a couple of times. We get very tempted, don't we?

• 3:04Ant McPartlin?

  We do.

• 3:05Declan Donnelly?

  But then you go, oh, it's a bit early to do it. And then.

• 3:09Speaker 04

  Have you ever not?

• 3:10Declan Donnelly?

  We got very close one year.

• 3:12Speaker 04

  Really?

• 3:12Declan Donnelly?

  Very. And one of the first years.

• 3:14Ant McPartlin?

  We left until the last day.

• 3:15Declan Donnelly?

  The last session of the last day.

• 3:16Speaker 04

  A lot of pressure.

• 3:17Ant McPartlin?

  Stupid idiot.

• 3:18Declan Donnelly?

  And thankfully, somebody turned up that was pretty good. So I can't remember who it was.

• 3:22Ant McPartlin?

  I can't remember. We've done pretty well with our golden buzzers over the years.

• 3:26Declan Donnelly?

  We won it one year.

• 3:27Ant McPartlin?

  Won it with John Courtney. And we've come close. We've made the final a few times.

• 3:32Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah, a few times. We haven't pressed it yet. We've been very, very tempted. Unfortunately, Simon's not with us at the moment.

• 3:40Ant McPartlin?

  He is in spirit.

• 3:41Declan Donnelly?

  But we do have a guest judge in the form of Bradley Walsh, who is really good, you know? He's done the Royal Variety Performance like four or five times. He's hosted the Royal Variety Performance. So he knows what it takes to get from here, the first audition, all the way to the Royal Variety. He's been in the business for years and years and years. He's good. His critiques have been good. The advice has been given the acts. He's been amazing.

• 4:03Ant McPartlin?

  He done one thing with a stand-up comic where he was like, normally for every other act, they get to go, okay, after the chat, all right, I'm gonna start. Music plays and you either dance or you sing. And that's the start of the act. He says, I find, I think it's very difficult for a comic to just go chat, chat, chat. Okay, joke, joke, joke. He says, so I'm gonna give you an intro. So go back off and then I'm gonna intro you on like you would on any other kind of stand-up show. And it worked really well, didn't it?

• 4:32Declan Donnelly?

  It worked really well.

• 4:34Ant McPartlin?

  We had quite a tough day yesterday.

• 4:36Speaker 04

  Go on.

• 4:36Ant McPartlin?

  At Blackpool. Because on the first day, it was Bradley's first day. Simon wasn't here. It's everybody's first day back. So it's all a bit like, woo, here we are. Woo, everyone's a bit excited. We kind of get through the day. They make it slightly lighter in terms of how many acts are here, just so everybody gets back in the swing of things. But yesterday was, that was a full-on, we had everything. We had danger, music, singers, comedians, magic. There was, I mean, chainsaws fired. We had everything. So there was a lot of, what you don't see on screen when you watch it is how long the intervals are between acts sometimes. Because you've got to set and strike whatever materials they've got on stage. So it does, it took quite a long time.

• 5:20Declan Donnelly?

  One of the setups was so long yesterday. Bradley Walsh had to do a song.

• 5:25Ant McPartlin?

  He sang? No, no, that's in his contract. He's got to do that every day.

• 5:29Declan Donnelly?

  He insists on that.

• 5:29Ant McPartlin?

  He insists on that. And then apparently, when we get to the live shows, we've got to hand out the album in the breaks.

• 5:35Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, do we?

• 5:35Ant McPartlin?

  To the audience. But that's good. We love BGC. You know, you never know what's gonna come around that corner, do you?

• 5:40Declan Donnelly?

  No. And we love being in Blackpool doing it as well. It's fantastic to be here at the Winter Gardens because the audiences are so good here.

• 5:49Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, they're really good.

• 5:50Declan Donnelly?

  We did it back in the day. And then we came back here a couple of years ago. I can't remember why. But we came back here a few years ago to do a few more days here. And the audiences were amazing. And now we do all of the auditions in Blackpool because the audiences are so good.

• 6:04Ant McPartlin?

  We have a nice time. We like the hotel we stay at. We get up in the morning. We do a bit of Pilates down in the basement.

• 6:13Declan Donnelly?

  Or yoga.

• 6:14Ant McPartlin?

  Depends what day it is.

• 6:16Speaker 04

  What was this morning?

• 6:16Declan Donnelly?

  This morning was yoga.

• 6:17Ant McPartlin?

  This morning was yoga.

• 6:18Declan Donnelly?

  Pilates yesterday, yoga today, yoga tomorrow. Then we've got yoga tomorrow, haven't we, dear?

• 6:23Ant McPartlin?

  And then Pilates on Friday, I think.

• 6:25Speaker 04

  Can either of you do a headstand?

• 6:26Ant McPartlin?

  Can we do a headstand?

• 6:28Speaker 04

  Or pro?

• 6:30Ant McPartlin?

  What's a pro?

• 6:30Speaker 04

  That one, that three one. She's like into a head. Can you go, can you almost do a headstand? Go on. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that one. It's like the prep.

• 6:44Ant McPartlin?

  There you go.

• 6:47Speaker 04

  That's very impressive.

• 6:49Ant McPartlin?

  And there's his wrist gone for paddle later.

• 6:51Declan Donnelly?

  I think I won't do yoga tomorrow.

• 6:54Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, we do that. We have a nice little routine in the morning. We do yoga, Pilates, a little bit of breakfast. And then in the auditions.

• 7:01Declan Donnelly?

  They do a lovely sausage in a roll, like in a circle.

• 7:06Ant McPartlin?

  Like a sausage roll?

• 7:07Declan Donnelly?

  No, like a sausage in a roll.

• 7:10Ant McPartlin?

  Like a Cumberland sausage?

• 7:10Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah. Like a Catherine wheel.

• 7:13Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, one of them ones. Isn't that the original Cumberland?

• 7:16Declan Donnelly?

  Could be, yeah.

• 7:17Ant McPartlin?

  When it's in a spiral like that.

• 7:18Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah, maybe.

• 7:19Ant McPartlin?

  I do love sausages. I do. Can we do a sausage special? I can't say that. Can we do a sausage special?

• 7:26Speaker 04

  You got it, can you?

• 7:28Ant McPartlin?

  Can we do a sausage special? Stop it.

• 7:31Declan Donnelly?

  Go on.

• 7:32Ant McPartlin?

  You try?

• 7:32Declan Donnelly?

  Sausage special.

• 7:33Ant McPartlin?

  See, it's tough. We should do a sausage special.

• 7:40Ant McPartlin?

  On the podcast where we taste lots. My favourite, I think, I mean, I've yet to be proved wrong, are proper Irish sausages.

• 7:51Declan Donnelly?

  Special Irish sausages. Say it, is it that?

• 7:53Ant McPartlin?

  Special Irish sausages.

• 7:57Ant McPartlin?

  You can't help but sound drunk.

• 8:00Ant McPartlin?

  Because they're the best. And I haven't found a better sausage than an Irish sausage.

• 8:09Ant McPartlin?

  So if we can do sausages from around the world where we try them here on the pod, then you would make two boys very happy.

• 8:18Speaker 04

  Irish sausage, right?

• 8:19Declan Donnelly?

  A sausage special.

• 8:22Ant McPartlin?

  I mean, none of us can intro it. You love to do the intro because us two will be rubbish at it. But we had a weekend in Newcastle before we came here. So we've been up north for a while, which has been lovely.

• 8:33Declan Donnelly?

  Yes.

• 8:34Ant McPartlin?

  We have been, well, I've been taking a lot of immune tablets, a lot of anti-flu stuff.

• 8:42Declan Donnelly?

  Are you surrounded by germs?

• 8:43Ant McPartlin?

  Everyone's sick at the minute. And I thought I was gonna feel sick. I woke up with this sort of, I thought, oh, no. Because if you remember, we both travelled up from London together on Thursday.

• 8:57Declan Donnelly?

  Yes.

• 8:58Ant McPartlin?

  So we had a few meetings in the day and then we raced to Heathrow and we got on the flight, didn't we?

• 9:02Declan Donnelly?

  We did.

• 9:02Ant McPartlin?

  You remember to bring a cap.

• 9:04Declan Donnelly?

  Yes, I did. I thought this in the airport.

• 9:07Ant McPartlin?

  Deck remembered to bring a cap, so he put his head down. I didn't bring a cap.

• 9:09Declan Donnelly?

  My disguise, my invisibility cloak.

• 9:12Ant McPartlin?

  I didn't bring a cap.

• 9:12Declan Donnelly?

  Put my cap on, nobody recognizes me.

• 9:14Ant McPartlin?

  So I got recognised a few times. And then when we got on the flight to Newcastle, we sat in the first row. So Deck got in the corner near the window, which, ah, I bagged it. But he got there with his cap on.

• 9:26Declan Donnelly?

  Gotta be quicker than that.

• 9:27Ant McPartlin?

  But I was on the aisle, no cap.

• 9:30Speaker 04

  Oh.

• 9:31Ant McPartlin?

  All right. I might as well have just said, I'm on my t-shirt.

• 9:34Declan Donnelly?

  And us, we were one of the first on the plane as well, in the front row, on the aisle. So every single person who walked on the plane.

• 9:42Ant McPartlin?

  Everybody, hi, Ains, hi, Ains. Hi, Ains. Hi, you okay? Hi, you all right? Can I have a selfie? Yeah, no problem. Can I have a selfie? Yeah, no problem. Hi, Ains. Selfie? Yeah, no problem.

• 9:51Speaker 04

  And it's a home crowd.

• 9:52Ant McPartlin?

  And it's a home crowd. Yeah, it's a very partisan crowd getting on that flight. So I thought, right, I need to kind of crouch, sort of crouch down a little bit just to kind of, because they were all backing up. They were backing up on the plane getting in. I was causing a bottleneck. So I thought, right, I need to, I need to crouch down a little bit to help the flow of traffic. So I was like this. And I saw through the gap of my fingers, my mother get on with, do you remember this?

• 10:19Declan Donnelly?

  No.

• 10:20Ant McPartlin?

  With a child who was about three-year-old in his pyjamas.

• 10:25Declan Donnelly?

  I missed this completely.

• 10:26Ant McPartlin?

  No, you did. Well, I tell you. So she was holding his hand and she let him go first. And he was about, say, about the same size as I was as I was crouching down. He just went.

• 10:43Ant McPartlin?

  And coughed in my face and spit well in my face. And I just said to you, to you, well, that's me, isn't it? So since then.

• 10:53Declan Donnelly?

  That's me, Weekend Ruin.

• 10:57Ant McPartlin?

  And it was my mum's 70th birthday meal, which I was flying off for. So I've been taking everything to kind of ward it off and so far it's worked. Right in my face. And I remember looking thinking, oh, he looks cute in his jammies. Oh, that's nice. She's got him in his jammies because when she gets there, he'll probably go straight to bed.

• 11:18Ant McPartlin?

  Right in the face.

• 11:19Declan Donnelly?

  And they were the last two people on, I think. He was the last person on. He just coughed right in his face.

• 11:24Ant McPartlin?

  Thanks, kid.

• 11:25Declan Donnelly?

  It was amazing.

• 11:30Declan Donnelly?

  As we're in Blackpool, we have, it's the law that you have to get some rock. We've got some rock here. We've got a nice orange one. I like the fact we've got a black and white stripe one.

• 11:37Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, well done.

• 11:38Speaker 04

  They say stuff on them.

• 11:39Ant McPartlin?

  They say stuff on them.

• 11:40Declan Donnelly?

  What?

• 11:41Ant McPartlin?

  Do I have to?

• 11:42Speaker 04

  So at the end.

• 11:44Ant McPartlin?

  At the end, let's have a look. So this is black and white stripe, so I'm hoping this says.

• 11:49Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, yeah.

• 11:49Ant McPartlin?

  Newcastle United. You'll never be able to zoom in on that. So don't even, sexy, don't even try. Don't even try.

• 11:57Declan Donnelly?

  If this one says Coventry City, I'll be furious.

• 12:01Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, it's got my name in it.

• 12:03Ant McPartlin?

  Huh?

• 12:04Declan Donnelly?

  The other one's got my name in it.

• 12:05Ant McPartlin?

  Have you? No way.

• 12:09Declan Donnelly?

  It's all the wrong way around.

• 12:10Speaker 04

  Is it?

• 12:10Declan Donnelly?

  It's back to front.

• 12:13Declan Donnelly?

  How does that work?

• 12:14Speaker 04

  I don't know.

• 12:14Declan Donnelly?

  You have to view it in a mirror.

• 12:17Speaker 04

  Not the other end?

• 12:17Declan Donnelly?

  No, both ends are the wrong way around.

• 12:20Ant McPartlin?

  What does mine say?

• 12:21Speaker 04

  We couldn't find yours, Ant.

• 12:22Ant McPartlin?

  What does mine say? Bitcoin?

• 12:25Speaker 04

  Auntie.

• 12:26Declan Donnelly?

  Let's have a look.

• 12:27Ant McPartlin?

  Auntie.

• 12:29Ant McPartlin?

  Auntie. Okay, it's close enough.

• 12:31Speaker 04

  Anthony was out, but Declan was in.

• 12:33Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, Anthony was sold out. That's why.

• 12:36Declan Donnelly?

  It's very popular. I'd never get my name in anything, so that's amazing.

• 12:39Speaker 04

  That's why I thought it was exciting.

• 12:40Declan Donnelly?

  It's really exciting. I mean, it'd be more exciting if it was, if it read.

• 12:44Ant McPartlin?

  Scott.

• 12:47Ant McPartlin?

  Scott, that one's better.

• 12:48Declan Donnelly?

  They're both wrong.

• 12:49Ant McPartlin?

  They're both, what do you mean they're both wrong?

• 12:50Declan Donnelly?

  Both back to front.

• 12:51Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, they know. Turn it the other way. So that's just, that's just upside down. There you go. That's upside down. There you go.

• 13:00Ant McPartlin?

  What does it taste like? What does, what does Aunt, what does Auntie taste like?

• 13:03Speaker 04

  Ooh.

• 13:04Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, oh.

• 13:05Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, they're quite new, them teeth as well, you know.

• 13:08Ant McPartlin?

  Black puffer in them teeth.

• 13:10Speaker 04

  I'm sorry, don't bite it, Chris.

• 13:14Speaker 04

  I wouldn't do that, Dec.

• 13:15Ant McPartlin?

  I used to love rocks, okay?

• 13:16Speaker 04

  I wouldn't do that.

• 13:18Declan Donnelly?

  I'm not crunching it.

• 13:19Ant McPartlin?

  That's a meme.

• 13:21Declan Donnelly?

  How do you do it?

• 13:22Ant McPartlin?

  I take back the idea of doing a sausage special if he eats things like that. Well, thank you.

• 13:28Speaker 04

  You're welcome. We're very excited to find Dec's name in an item.

• 13:31Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, it's good.

• 13:33Declan Donnelly?

  My name is never in anything.

• 13:33Speaker 04

  Ant sold out.

• 13:35Declan Donnelly?

  I was up in Newcastle at the weekend.

• 13:36Ant McPartlin?

  Uh huh.

• 13:37Declan Donnelly?

  Played my first ever game of paddle.

• 13:39Ant McPartlin?

  And?

• 13:40Declan Donnelly?

  I'm absolutely obsessed.

• 13:41Ant McPartlin?

  Good.

• 13:42Declan Donnelly?

  It was closely followed by my second game of paddle because I loved it so much, we booked another court for two days later. So two of my nephews, Oliver and Dominic.

• 13:50Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah.

• 13:51Declan Donnelly?

  My brother-in-law, Vince, we went down, played paddle, absolutely loved it. Apparently, I was a bit of a bandit because I've never played before.

• 13:59Speaker 04

  Is that good or bad?

• 14:00Declan Donnelly?

  It's good.

• 14:00Ant McPartlin?

  That's good. That means he's like.

• 14:02Speaker 04

  Natural.

• 14:03Ant McPartlin?

  He's a natural. He's better, he's better than he said he would be. That's what he's trying to say.

• 14:07Declan Donnelly?

  Well, I'd never played before, so I didn't know how good I was.

• 14:09Speaker 04

  A humble brag.

• 14:11Declan Donnelly?

  It's a, it's a very, it's not, it's not even a humble, it's not humble. It's just a brag.

• 14:15Ant McPartlin?

  It's quite flexy, isn't it?

• 14:17Declan Donnelly?

  It is, really. But apparently I've got a real aptitude for it, so.

• 14:21Ant McPartlin?

  Aptitude. Aptitude for paddle. Oh, God. Is this now your personality?

• 14:27Declan Donnelly?

  This is my thing. I'm paddle guy now.

• 14:29Ant McPartlin?

  Paddle guy.

• 14:30Declan Donnelly?

  I'm biffing off golf. That's gone.

• 14:31Ant McPartlin?

  What?

• 14:32Declan Donnelly?

  Don't care about golf.

• 14:33Ant McPartlin?

  What are you talking about?

• 14:33Declan Donnelly?

  I'm a paddle guy now, so.

• 14:35Ant McPartlin?

  You're biffing off golf?

• 14:36Declan Donnelly?

  Mm-hmm. I'm better at paddle than I am at golf, so paddle for me now. Paddle all the way. I've got paddle pals now in Blackpool.

• 14:43Ant McPartlin?

  We aren't actually. It's me. He doesn't have any pals in Blackpool. He roped me in to play paddle with him.

• 14:50Declan Donnelly?

  At the end, I got you on, do you want to play paddle on Wednesday?

• 14:53Ant McPartlin?

  Do you know what I was saying, what we should do, right? Because I reckon we'd be really good at this.

• 14:57Declan Donnelly?

  Humble brag.

• 14:59Ant McPartlin?

  We will. As a, as a duo, right, as a, as a paddle doubles act, double act, what do you call them?

• 15:05Speaker 04

  Paddle double act.

• 15:06Declan Donnelly?

  Paddle team.

• 15:07Speaker 04

  Paddle act.

• 15:07Ant McPartlin?

  Paddle act?

• 15:08Speaker 04

  Paddle act.

• 15:09Ant McPartlin?

  Paddle team. Paddle doubles, right? We'd be hard to beat. So I reckon.

• 15:14Speaker 04

  Have you ever played it? Based on?

• 15:16Ant McPartlin?

  We used to play tennis a lot together.

• 15:17Speaker 04

  And were you good?

• 15:19Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, we were okay, actually.

• 15:20Speaker 04

  Okay.

• 15:20Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah.

• 15:21Declan Donnelly?

  We were the same level.

• 15:22Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah.

• 15:22Speaker 04

  Okay.

• 15:22Ant McPartlin?

  Which was pretty good.

• 15:24Speaker 04

  Pretty good.

• 15:24Ant McPartlin?

  Um, so I think we should start our YouTube series where we take on other celebrities.

• 15:31Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 15:32Declan Donnelly?

  Celebrity pairings?

• 15:33Ant McPartlin?

  Celebrity pairings and see if we can beat them.

• 15:34Speaker 04

  It could be like, you know, on YouTube when people call out boxers for a boxing match?

• 15:38Ant McPartlin?

  Yes.

• 15:39Speaker 04

  We should do that right now. Call, look down the lens and name who, who you call out for a paddle.

• 15:43Declan Donnelly?

  Andy and Jamie Murray.

• 15:45Ant McPartlin?

  You'll be last. You'll be last. We need to work up to you.

• 15:49Declan Donnelly?

  Okay, maybe we've started too high.

• 15:51Ant McPartlin?

  We need a few matches before we get to Andy and Jamie Murray.

• 15:54Declan Donnelly?

  Okay.

• 15:55Ant McPartlin?

  Okay?

• 15:55Declan Donnelly?

  Right.

• 15:56Ant McPartlin?

  So anyone out there, things you can take us on, if you're a celebrity, get in touch.

• 16:02Speaker 04

  Do they have to be a celebrity double?

• 16:03Ant McPartlin?

  They have to be a celebrity. Well, not necessarily double act, just friends.

• 16:06Speaker 04

  Okay, celeb friends.

• 16:07Declan Donnelly?

  And then we can interview them while we paddle with them.

• 16:09Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah.

• 16:09Declan Donnelly?

  Paddle pals.

• 16:10Speaker 04

  I love it.

• 16:11Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah.

• 16:11Declan Donnelly?

  Should we do that?

• 16:12Speaker 04

  Series two. Let's ditch the set.

• 16:15Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah.

• 16:17Declan Donnelly?

  Let's take it all to the industrial park and to a paddle court. They're always on industrial parks, aren't they?

• 16:22Ant McPartlin?

  Tell you what we should take on. Rob Beckett and Josh.

• 16:24Declan Donnelly?

  Josh.

• 16:25Ant McPartlin?

  Would it come?

• 16:25Declan Donnelly?

  Would it come?

• 16:25Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah. Oh, Rob Beckett, Rob and Ramesh.

• 16:28Declan Donnelly?

  Rob and Ramesh versus.

• 16:30Ant McPartlin?

  Rob and Ramesh versus at the deck. That'd be good. I paddle for YouTube. Let's do it. Okay?

• 16:36Declan Donnelly?

  And then Jamie and Andy Murray.

• 16:38Ant McPartlin?

  In 2028.

• 16:39Declan Donnelly?

  Well, we've got a bit better.

• 16:40Ant McPartlin?

  Well, yeah. Yeah, exactly. Tom Holland, Spider-Man, he plays.

• 16:43Declan Donnelly?

  Does he?

• 16:43Ant McPartlin?

  He does.

• 16:44Declan Donnelly?

  He'd be really good.

• 16:45Ant McPartlin?

  Don't think we actually ever played as a duo.

• 16:46Declan Donnelly?

  We didn't, we never played doubles. We just played each other. We've never.

• 16:49Ant McPartlin?

  We might really argue on the court.

• 16:51Declan Donnelly?

  This could be the beginning of the end.

• 16:56Ant McPartlin?

  This podcast is sponsored by Santander, who understand that making confident decisions with your savings can help you feel more in control of the future.

• 17:04Declan Donnelly?

  Do you remember when we first started working on Biter Grove?

• 17:08Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, yes.

• 17:08Declan Donnelly?

  It was a proper job, which was a thrill in itself to be on the telly and get to take time off school to film it. And then they went, and we're paying you for this.

• 17:17Ant McPartlin?

  I know.

• 17:17Declan Donnelly?

  I couldn't believe it.

• 17:19Ant McPartlin?

  Do you still remember how much you got paid?

• 17:20Declan Donnelly?

  I do remember exactly how much.

• 17:22Ant McPartlin?

  How much?

• 17:22Declan Donnelly?

  £200.

• 17:24Ant McPartlin?

  Per episode?

• 17:24Declan Donnelly?

  Per episode.

• 17:25Ant McPartlin?

  Wow.

• 17:25Declan Donnelly?

  And I was in three episodes.

• 17:27Ant McPartlin?

  I think the money went up when I, when I joined.

• 17:29Declan Donnelly?

  Did it?

• 17:29Ant McPartlin?

  Hmm, yeah.

• 17:30Declan Donnelly?

  What?

• 17:30Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah.

• 17:30Declan Donnelly?

  You were more than me.

• 17:31Ant McPartlin?

  No, I don't think I was on more than you.

• 17:33Declan Donnelly?

  I'm so shock revelation.

• 17:34Ant McPartlin?

  The money went up for everybody in series two.

• 17:36Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, right. I see.

• 17:37Ant McPartlin?

  I think it was £300.

• 17:38Declan Donnelly?

  Not for me, it wasn't.

• 17:40Ant McPartlin?

  Go on.

• 17:41Declan Donnelly?

  Um, but I remember getting that first paycheck.

• 17:44Ant McPartlin?

  Uh huh.

• 17:44Declan Donnelly?

  And I was so excited. And in the back of one of my exercise books from school, I drew a little table and I wrote down what I was going to buy, how much it cost.

• 17:54Ant McPartlin?

  Did you?

• 17:55Declan Donnelly?

  And a little thing to take it off when I bought it.

• 17:56Ant McPartlin?

  And did you buy all the things?

• 17:58Declan Donnelly?

  I bought them.

• 17:58Ant McPartlin?

  Did you? Because you were a big saver.

• 18:01Declan Donnelly?

  I was a massive saver.

• 18:02Ant McPartlin?

  You're a much better saver than me.

• 18:03Declan Donnelly?

  Well, I was quite frugal with it. So I knew what.

• 18:05Ant McPartlin?

  Frugal is a good word.

• 18:07Declan Donnelly?

  I knew what I was going to do with it and I was going to save the rest. I even budgeted for a KFC.

• 18:14Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah, I was very good at saving back in the day. Very good. Do you know who else is good at saving? Santander.

• 18:20Ant McPartlin?

  Very good. Whether you're saving towards a goal or simply making the most of money you've already put aside. Santander's fixed rate ISAs can provide the confidence of a guaranteed return.

• 18:30Declan Donnelly?

  For more information, visit santander.co.uk or search Santander Fixed Rate ISA. Santander, it starts here.

• 18:38Ant McPartlin?

  Over to Heckless Corner for the Ts and Cs.

• 18:41Speaker 04

  UK residence, age 18 plus, minimum opening balance £500. Ts and Cs and eligibility criteria apply.

• 18:49Ant McPartlin?

  Best ever.

• 18:49Speaker 04

  Oh, fine.

• 18:50Ant McPartlin?

  Best year. Well done, Fatia.

• 18:54Ant McPartlin?

  Do you know who's played here?

• 18:55Declan Donnelly?

  In the Winter Gardens at Blackpool, I would say everybody, probably.

• 18:59Ant McPartlin?

  Frank Starre, he's played here.

• 19:01Declan Donnelly?

  Has he really?

• 19:01Ant McPartlin?

  In that room next door.

• 19:03Declan Donnelly?

  The Beatles?

• 19:04Ant McPartlin?

  The Beatles. Mortman Wise.

• 19:05Declan Donnelly?

  Mortman Wise, there's a statue of them out in the foyer.

• 19:07Ant McPartlin?

  Everyone. Bruce Forsyth.

• 19:09Declan Donnelly?

  Is it true that the Rolling Stones were banned from playing in Blackpool for a bit?

• 19:13Speaker 04

  Yep, an indefinite ban.

• 19:15Declan Donnelly?

  Indefinite ban?

• 19:16Speaker 04

  But it got lifted in 2008, so it's 44 years.

• 19:19Declan Donnelly?

  When was it put in place? 196?

• 19:20Speaker 04

  1964.

• 19:22Declan Donnelly?

  What for? What were they banned from Blackpool for?

• 19:24Speaker 04

  Causing a riot.

• 19:25Declan Donnelly?

  So they were banned for 44 years? And since the ban's been lifted, have they played Blackpool since? I wonder if they hold a grudge.

• 19:30Speaker 04

  No, they've not played since.

• 19:32Declan Donnelly?

  No, I bet they haven't.

• 19:33Ant McPartlin?

  I bet they haven't.

• 19:34Speaker 04

  Mr. Tumbles performed here.

• 19:35Ant McPartlin?

  Mr. Tumbles performed here.

• 19:37Speaker 04

  Oasis.

• 19:37Ant McPartlin?

  Oasis.

• 19:39Declan Donnelly?

  Similar audiences.

• 19:40Speaker 04

  Best audiences, though.

• 19:41Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 19:41Ant McPartlin?

  Well, great audiences in Blackpool. That's why we keep coming. What's this? Airplane.

• 19:46Declan Donnelly?

  Airplane flown in, direct to Blackpool. What does it say, Ant?

• 19:50Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, I've ripped it. Brilliant. That's a good start. It says, we've got some scenarios for what makes a good audience member.

• 19:57Declan Donnelly?

  Ah.

• 19:58Ant McPartlin?

  Do you know?

• 19:59Declan Donnelly?

  Because we've had some brilliant audiences here in Blackpool. So what does make a good audience member?

• 20:03Ant McPartlin?

  Well, Chris emailed to ask, hi guys, is it acceptable when I take hot pepperoni pizza and wedges in the cinema? Respect, guys.

• 20:16Declan Donnelly?

  What, from home or has he brought them in the foyer?

• 20:18Ant McPartlin?

  Doesn't matter where they're from.

• 20:19Declan Donnelly?

  Hot pepperoni pizza.

• 20:21Ant McPartlin?

  But I presume they're from outside of the cinema.

• 20:23Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah, I guess.

• 20:23Ant McPartlin?

  You know, you get some cinemas, you can order food till you sleep. He's bringing them in from, from outside.

• 20:28Declan Donnelly?

  That's fine. In the cinema, it's fine. I wouldn't do it in the theatre or the ballet or the opera.

• 20:31Ant McPartlin?

  No? So it's acceptable for a cinema?

• 20:33Declan Donnelly?

  It's acceptable for the cinema, in my humble opinion.

• 20:36Ant McPartlin?

  So if you were in a cinema that you can't order food till you sleep, like just a popcorny kind of place? Chris came in with a massive takeaway, pepperoni pizza, flipped open the lid.

• 20:45Declan Donnelly?

  I'd go, oh, he's, he's, he's done it right, hasn't he?

• 20:48Ant McPartlin?

  Would you?

• 20:48Declan Donnelly?

  He's done it right.

• 20:49Ant McPartlin?

  That wouldn't offend you?

• 20:50Declan Donnelly?

  No.

• 20:50Ant McPartlin?

  Okay.

• 20:51Declan Donnelly?

  What would you think?

• 20:52Ant McPartlin?

  I'm on the fence.

• 20:53Declan Donnelly?

  Hmm.

• 20:53Ant McPartlin?

  Because I want to enjoy the film.

• 20:55Declan Donnelly?

  I think I'd feel jealous more than anything.

• 20:56Ant McPartlin?

  I think I would. The smell.

• 20:57Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 20:58Ant McPartlin?

  The smell would really get us. I'd really want, I'd ask for a slice.

• 21:02Declan Donnelly?

  You'd have to.

• 21:03Ant McPartlin?

  I would. If, if you looked over and he was like, and he had that look in his eyes like, is it, is it Ant from Ant Deck? I'm like, I think I could ask for a slice here. I'd like to put this to the test.

• 21:13Declan Donnelly?

  Especially if it's a large pepperoni pizza that, you know, he's kind of like, I've had enough and there's three slices left. You're like. Come on, Chris. It's not going to kill you, is it?

• 21:22Ant McPartlin?

  Would you dip, in his dip after he dipped in it?

• 21:23Declan Donnelly?

  No, I wouldn't. I don't know, Chris. Well enough.

• 21:26Ant McPartlin?

  Um, next one. Someone behind you at the cinema keeps talking.

• 21:29Declan Donnelly?

  No.

• 21:30Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah. No, no, that's most of this. You ask them to be quiet, they get louder. Is it acceptable to shout, shut up, even if you disturb the whole cinema?

• 21:41Declan Donnelly?

  Um, no, it's not acceptable to do that, I don't think.

• 21:45Ant McPartlin?

  So you've asked someone to be quiet.

• 21:47Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 21:47Ant McPartlin?

  And they don't.

• 21:48Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 21:48Ant McPartlin?

  How do you deal with that?

• 21:49Declan Donnelly?

  I would turn around again and go, guys, come on, play the game.

• 21:53Ant McPartlin?

  The game of what? What game? Paddle. The game of paddle. There's two of you, there's two of us, let's booger call.

• 22:01Declan Donnelly?

  Are you free on Wednesday?

• 22:04Declan Donnelly?

  No, I go, come on, guys, play the game. We're all trying to watch the movie. Uh, no, I would, I would ask them again politely, and then if it carried on a third time, then I might have to get physical.

• 22:15Ant McPartlin?

  Physical? Well, you'd like do press ups and stuff, some yoga moves, some pilates in front of them, just put them off.

• 22:21Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah, maybe. I'd do that. What's that called?

• 22:23Speaker 04

  Do the crow.

• 22:24Declan Donnelly?

  Crow. I'd do the crow. Really scared of them.

• 22:29Declan Donnelly?

  Actually, you start doing that. Just start doing yoga. Or like the crane, like a crow.

• 22:36Ant McPartlin?

  In front of them, like, oh, put me off.

• 22:39Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 22:40Ant McPartlin?

  I'd stop talking immediately.

• 22:41Declan Donnelly?

  Like you would.

• 22:42Ant McPartlin?

  Next, your other half said they didn't want popcorn, right?

• 22:46Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 22:46Ant McPartlin?

  When you went in. But when you have the bucket on your lap.

• 22:49Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, well, this is a familiar scenario.

• 22:50Ant McPartlin?

  They keep dipping into it.

• 22:52Declan Donnelly?

  Yes.

• 22:52Ant McPartlin?

  Is it acceptable to move it away from them and haul it on the other side? What, on somebody else's lap?

• 23:00Declan Donnelly?

  Sorry, Chris. Sorry. Is that, is that getting in the way of your pizza?

• 23:05Ant McPartlin?

  Sorry, Chris, hold that while I do the crane.

• 23:09Declan Donnelly?

  Um, no, that's not acceptable. Listen, doesn't matter, I always think, doesn't matter how much popcorn you buy at the cinema, you never finish it.

• 23:17Ant McPartlin?

  Now you don't?

• 23:17Declan Donnelly?

  There's always popcorn left at the end of it.

• 23:19Ant McPartlin?

  It's never great, is it?

• 23:20Declan Donnelly?

  No.

• 23:21Ant McPartlin?

  Next one?

• 23:22Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 23:22Ant McPartlin?

  You're sitting in the middle of a row in a packed cinema.

• 23:25Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 23:26Ant McPartlin?

  And you need to do a massive guff. Was that a fart?

• 23:32Ant McPartlin?

  You know it'll be loud, but odorless. Is it acceptable to let it rip?

• 23:39Declan Donnelly?

  How do you know it's gonna be odorless?

• 23:41Ant McPartlin?

  You don't know.

• 23:42Declan Donnelly?

  You can hope.

• 23:42Ant McPartlin?

  That's a roulette, that.

• 23:43Declan Donnelly?

  You can hope.

• 23:44Ant McPartlin?

  You never know.

• 23:45Speaker 04

  It's roulette.

• 23:46Ant McPartlin?

  You never, that's, that's, that's guff roulette.

• 23:49Declan Donnelly?

  Stinky roulette.

• 23:50Ant McPartlin?

  No, it's not. It's not acceptable.

• 23:51Declan Donnelly?

  No, it's not acceptable. You got really pushed down in the seat for that one.

• 23:55Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah. And then that's it then. Then you're sitting on it for the rest of the movie. And you can't, you can't enjoy a three hour movie without going on your trousers.

• 24:02Declan Donnelly?

  You've got to go to the toilet for that.

• 24:04Ant McPartlin?

  No, but if you stand and walk out.

• 24:06Declan Donnelly?

  Well, I think I would prefer that.

• 24:08Ant McPartlin?

  What, on the route?

• 24:09Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 24:09Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah.

• 24:10Declan Donnelly?

  I think somebody doing that beside me, I'd rather they walked out.

• 24:14Ant McPartlin?

  Where were we recently? And somebody had farted. Oh my god. And it stunk.

• 24:20Speaker 04

  In Canada.

• 24:21Ant McPartlin?

  In Canada!

• 24:22Speaker 04

  The gondola.

• 24:23Ant McPartlin?

  That was it. The cable car. We're in the queue for the cable car and the gondola in Canada. Do you remember? It was when we went the first day and we decided to go over the gondola.

• 24:33Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, yes.

• 24:34Ant McPartlin?

  And we thought, we'll get the one which has got the glass bottom, so we can see through it. And we stood in the queue and there's a few people in front of us and it stunk.

• 24:41Declan Donnelly?

  That's right, yeah.

• 24:41Ant McPartlin?

  And we're like, we're not standing in this. So we ended up getting in the gondola, which didn't have a glass bottom because somebody farted. Unacceptable.

• 24:49Declan Donnelly?

  We didn't get the glass bottom because somebody had a dirty bottom.

• 24:52Ant McPartlin?

  You're watching a film with your family and you hate it. Is it acceptable to spend the second half wearing one sneaky earbud secretly listening to your football team play?

• 25:03Declan Donnelly?

  I don't think it is unacceptable. I wouldn't even do that. I just normally have a sleep.

• 25:07Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, you always sleep, Jude, folk.

• 25:08Declan Donnelly?

  I've done that several times. I was just like, if we could take the kids and like, I don't need to watch this. I'm off. See you later.

• 25:15Ant McPartlin?

  I watched the football the last day of the season at Wilders Christening. It's that bad? I mean, all the kind of, all the churchy stuff was done. It was the, it was the, um.

• 25:25Declan Donnelly?

  The reception.

• 25:26Ant McPartlin?

  The reception. No, no, I didn't have to do it. Like, three different people got their laptops out and had the football on.

• 25:32Declan Donnelly?

  Who, who got their laptops out?

• 25:34Ant McPartlin?

  You!

• 25:34Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, yeah, it was me.

• 25:37Ant McPartlin?

  You were one of them.

• 25:38Declan Donnelly?

  I brought my iPad.

• 25:40Ant McPartlin?

  It was a big deal. We had to know if Newcastle were gonna qualify for the Champions League. And we did by the skill of our teeth.

• 25:45Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah, it was a big match.

• 25:45Ant McPartlin?

  It was, yeah. So, um, that's acceptable, right? Laptops at Christendoms.

• 25:50Speaker 04

  It's your son.

• 25:51Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, exactly.

• 25:53Declan Donnelly?

  I told you that, um, we went to see a movie, didn't we? I had a sleep and Ali ordered a trestle table from Argos.

• 25:58Ant McPartlin?

  Yes.

• 25:59Declan Donnelly?

  During the movie. We had to go and pick it up on the way home.

• 26:02Ant McPartlin?

  And it wasn't even a movie you were watching with the kids?

• 26:03Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah, it was, yeah.

• 26:04Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, good. I thought it was like a date night.

• 26:06Declan Donnelly?

  No, no.

• 26:06Ant McPartlin?

  She ordered trestle tables and you fell asleep. Sexy. And finally, you're spending the day walking around town and your feet are killing you.

• 26:15Declan Donnelly?

  Hmm.

• 26:16Ant McPartlin?

  Is it acceptable to take your shoes off during the film? And if it is, is it acceptable to take off your socks?

• 26:27Ant McPartlin?

  Clearly I had that bit. Uh, I think it's always acceptable to take off your shoes.

• 26:32Declan Donnelly?

  In the cinema?

• 26:32Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah. I've done it before.

• 26:34Declan Donnelly?

  What if you're kind of thigh to thigh with people you don't know?

• 26:38Ant McPartlin?

  Thigh to thigh?

• 26:39Declan Donnelly?

  What if somebody's sitting next to you on either side?

• 26:42Ant McPartlin?

  That's all right.

• 26:42Declan Donnelly?

  You still do that?

• 26:43Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah. Yeah. I don't have smelly feet.

• 26:46Declan Donnelly?

  Says he.

• 26:46Ant McPartlin?

  No, I don't. I don't. Thankfully.

• 26:48Declan Donnelly?

  Humble brag.

• 26:50Ant McPartlin?

  But it's a bit of a flex, that.

• 26:51Speaker 04

  That is a good bet.

• 26:53Declan Donnelly?

  How do you manage that?

• 26:54Ant McPartlin?

  I just don't, I, I do sweat. No, I do sweat. I just don't have.

• 26:59Declan Donnelly?

  Particularly smelly feet.

• 27:00Ant McPartlin?

  Particularly smelly feet. And I think, because I change with trainers a lot, so I don't, they don't get sweaty. So, I'm, I'm quite lucky like that.

• 27:08Declan Donnelly?

  Would you take your socks off?

• 27:09Ant McPartlin?

  No, I wouldn't take my socks off. Nobody.

• 27:10Declan Donnelly?

  Even with those lovely wiki feet socks?

• 27:12Ant McPartlin?

  Well, yeah, it's a good point, actually. People might, people might, people might want to see them if they've seen wiki feet.

• 27:17Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 27:18Ant McPartlin?

  Maybe I'll think of that. Yeah, I will. I will. But yeah. I see why people wear Birkenstocks more. That I've got into Birkenstocks now. Just slip them off.

• 27:26Declan Donnelly?

  Good dilemmas, though.

• 27:27Ant McPartlin?

  Very good. Very good. More of them. We'd like more of them for different, uh.

• 27:32Declan Donnelly?

  Scenarios.

• 27:32Ant McPartlin?

  Different scenarios, different occasions.

• 27:34Declan Donnelly?

  Is it acceptable to, yes, send them in to us.

• 27:37Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah.

• 27:37Declan Donnelly?

  Hanging out at beltabox.com.

• 27:40Ant McPartlin?

  This episode is brought to you in partnership with Airbnb. It's nearly that time of year again.

• 27:45Declan Donnelly?

  We're off to Australia very soon.

• 27:47Ant McPartlin?

  Off to Australia again.

• 27:48Declan Donnelly?

  I'm very excited and have started packing already.

• 27:51Ant McPartlin?

  I know. I don't, I just don't get why you do it so early, man.

• 27:54Declan Donnelly?

  My spare room looks like there's been a closed explosion.

• 27:57Ant McPartlin?

  Have you unpacked from Canada, though?

• 27:58Declan Donnelly?

  No, not really.

• 27:59Ant McPartlin?

  No, so what do you, what do you do?

• 28:00Declan Donnelly?

  Very different climates, you see. Very different climates.

• 28:03Ant McPartlin?

  So you've left that one half unpacked.

• 28:05Declan Donnelly?

  Yes.

• 28:05Ant McPartlin?

  And this one's just about to get packed.

• 28:07Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 28:07Ant McPartlin?

  With short sleeve shirts and t-shirts.

• 28:09Declan Donnelly?

  Exactly that.

• 28:10Ant McPartlin?

  And shorts and flip flops.

• 28:11Declan Donnelly?

  I was talking to a guy the other day as well, who travels a lot for work.

• 28:14Ant McPartlin?

  Right.

• 28:14Declan Donnelly?

  As we do. And he told me a very interesting thing, that when he goes away for work for a period of time, he lists his house on Airbnb.

• 28:23Ant McPartlin?

  Does he?

• 28:24Declan Donnelly?

  Yes.

• 28:24Ant McPartlin?

  How does that work?

• 28:25Declan Donnelly?

  Well, you know, you can go away and stay in an Airbnb. You can also list your own home and put it on Airbnb whilst you're away.

• 28:33Ant McPartlin?

  That's clever.

• 28:33Declan Donnelly?

  Hmm. He said it's a great way of earning extra money. You decide when you want to host, how long for, and Bob's your uncle, extra money.

• 28:41Ant McPartlin?

  So Bob was the guy that mentioned this to you?

• 28:42Declan Donnelly?

  No, no, Bob's got nothing to do with it.

• 28:43Ant McPartlin?

  But Bob is your uncle?

• 28:44Declan Donnelly?

  No.

• 28:45Ant McPartlin?

  You do have an uncle, Bob, though, don't you?

• 28:46Declan Donnelly?

  I do, but no, it's me brother in law.

• 28:47Ant McPartlin?

  Right, okay. What's this Bob gonna spend all his money on?

• 28:51Declan Donnelly?

  Um, he's gonna spend it on a holiday so he can go away after he's been travelling for all his work.

• 28:55Ant McPartlin?

  Okay, good, makes sense.

• 28:57Declan Donnelly?

  It's cause, it's a fascinating guy, Bob.

• 28:59Ant McPartlin?

  So your home might be worth more than you think.

• 29:02Declan Donnelly?

  Find out more over airbnb.co.uk/host.

• 29:08Speaker 04

  So obviously you guys are in Blackpool because great audiences and it's got a showbiz history.

• 29:13Declan Donnelly?

  Yes.

• 29:14Speaker 04

  It's also famous for its pier.

• 29:16Declan Donnelly?

  Blackpool Pier?

• 29:17Ant McPartlin?

  It's got three piers.

• 29:18Declan Donnelly?

  Yes, it is.

• 29:18Speaker 04

  If you look in that little zip thing, there's a little, there's a little toy for you. Cause I've got a game.

• 29:25Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, I've always wanted one of these.

• 29:28Ant McPartlin?

  A telescope! For those of you just listening, Deck has pulled out a telescope from a very nice brown leather pouch.

• 29:36Declan Donnelly?

  I've always wanted a telescope.

• 29:37Speaker 04

  Well, you can have that.

• 29:39Declan Donnelly?

  Get in.

• 29:40Speaker 04

  So I've got a list of peers and I'd like to know if you stood on the end of the pier with that telescope and looked straight forward, what land would you see? So we'll start with Blackpool Pier. So if you stood on the end of Blackpool Pier.

• 29:52Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 29:52Speaker 04

  And looked directly forward, what land would you hit?

• 29:55Ant McPartlin?

  Well, Blackpool is north west England, so the pier will be pointing west.

• 30:02Declan Donnelly?

  I presume.

• 30:03Ant McPartlin?

  So island.

• 30:05Speaker 04

  Yes. Kilock.

• 30:06Ant McPartlin?

  Kilock. Where, where's that?

• 30:08Speaker 04

  County Down, Northern Ireland.

• 30:09Ant McPartlin?

  Nor, Northern Ireland?

• 30:11Declan Donnelly?

  County Down.

• 30:11Ant McPartlin?

  Ah, okay, that's good. This is good. I like this game. I love geography games. More, please.

• 30:16Speaker 04

  Yeah, they're fun. Okay, Brighton Pier.

• 30:20Ant McPartlin?

  Brighton Pier, um, Sussex, so it's bottom of the country. You're looking down, you'd be looking to.

• 30:27Declan Donnelly?

  France.

• 30:27Ant McPartlin?

  France.

• 30:28Declan Donnelly?

  Brittany.

• 30:29Speaker 04

  France, correct. Not Brittany.

• 30:31Ant McPartlin?

  Normandy.

• 30:31Speaker 04

  Normandy. Saint Valerie Encore.

• 30:35Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, Encore.

• 30:37Speaker 04

  What about the Grand Pier on Western Supermere?

• 30:40Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, Western Supermere, which is near Bristol Way, so.

• 30:44Declan Donnelly?

  Just down there, south.

• 30:44Ant McPartlin?

  Where's that? That's southwest.

• 30:46Declan Donnelly?

  Southwest, sorry, south, south, southwest.

• 30:48Ant McPartlin?

  So you'd be looking out at like South Island? Oh, no, maybe.

• 30:54Declan Donnelly?

  Would you see South Wales?

• 30:55Ant McPartlin?

  Would you see South Wales?

• 30:56Declan Donnelly?

  I don't think you'd get past South Wales.

• 30:58Speaker 04

  Barry in Wales.

• 30:59Ant McPartlin?

  Barry, yeah, good one.

• 31:01Speaker 04

  We are not keeping score, sorry.

• 31:03Ant McPartlin?

  That's great. Doesn't matter. We don't need to keep score for everything.

• 31:05Declan Donnelly?

  This is us working together as a team, paddle pals.

• 31:08Speaker 04

  It's learning.

• 31:09Declan Donnelly?

  This is the paddle pals working together.

• 31:11Speaker 04

  Yeah, paddle practice. Okay, what about Cromer in Norfolk?

• 31:14Ant McPartlin?

  Never be, ever been, ever been.

• 31:16Declan Donnelly?

  Never been, never been. Um.

• 31:17Ant McPartlin?

  Cromer?

• 31:18Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah. So in Norfolk, so you're on the east coast. Looking east, I would say the Netherlands.

• 31:25Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, I'd say the, well, it depends where it's pointing. So if it's pointing nor, is it north, you could be looking all the way to like.

• 31:33Declan Donnelly?

  Norway.

• 31:34Ant McPartlin?

  We could be looking all the way to Norway or Sweden.

• 31:36Declan Donnelly?

  No, I think in Netherlands.

• 31:37Speaker 04

  Norway.

• 31:38Ant McPartlin?

  Norway!

• 31:39Speaker 04

  Norway.

• 31:40Declan Donnelly?

  Norway.

• 31:41Speaker 04

  It's Long Yee Bian on the Svalbard Archipelago, which is unbelievably beautiful. Um, it's got a population of polar bears and is the northernmost airport in the world.

• 31:52Ant McPartlin?

  I'd like to go. Let's just go to archipelagos, because it's such a good word.

• 31:57Speaker 04

  Isn't it?

• 31:58Ant McPartlin?

  Isn't it?

• 31:58Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 31:59Declan Donnelly?

  I think that's a bar in Blackpool. Archipelagos.

• 32:03Speaker 04

  Let's go. Um, Southend Pier.

• 32:05Declan Donnelly?

  Now, Southend is in Essex.

• 32:08Ant McPartlin?

  It is in Essex, so that is southeast. So you'd have to be looking at Holland.

• 32:13Declan Donnelly?

  Am I in the Netherlands yet?

• 32:14Speaker 04

  No.

• 32:15Ant McPartlin?

  Really? Not in Belgium?

• 32:16Speaker 04

  No.

• 32:17Declan Donnelly?

  Germany.

• 32:18Speaker 04

  Kent.

• 32:19Declan Donnelly?

  What?

• 32:19Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, how?

• 32:20Speaker 04

  It's on the, um, Estory.

• 32:23Declan Donnelly?

  Trick question.

• 32:23Ant McPartlin?

  Trick question.

• 32:24Declan Donnelly?

  Trick question.

• 32:25Speaker 04

  All right, one more. What about South Shields Pier? And you look due east from Newcastle. Where do you get?

• 32:32Declan Donnelly?

  South Shields. I would have said, I would have said back to Norway, but.

• 32:35Speaker 04

  So there's two piers. If we just go directly east out.

• 32:39Declan Donnelly?

  Right.

• 32:40Speaker 04

  They kind of do this, so.

• 32:41Declan Donnelly?

  Right.

• 32:41Ant McPartlin?

  So straight out.

• 32:42Speaker 04

  Straight out.

• 32:43Ant McPartlin?

  So that's the east coast. Newcastle's there. You're going straight out across to, that's gotta be Holland.

• 32:49Declan Donnelly?

  Holland. Am I finally in Holland yet?

• 32:51Speaker 04

  A little bit higher.

• 32:52Declan Donnelly?

  No, well, it's Norway again, or.

• 32:54Speaker 04

  Pit lower?

• 32:54Ant McPartlin?

  Denmark?

• 32:55Speaker 04

  Yes, Denmark. End up in Denmark.

• 32:58Ant McPartlin?

  Well, I hope you enjoyed that, if you were listening, because we certainly did. You know, I've learnt so, it's what we need on this podcast to learn something. It's too much waffle from my like you.

• 33:10Declan Donnelly?

  Too true. We've had loads of grumbles this week.

• 33:14Ant McPartlin?

  We have?

• 33:14Declan Donnelly?

  The grumbles are really catching on. We've got a few in our little folder. You want to go first?

• 33:20Ant McPartlin?

  I'll start. Hi guys, I wanted to write in to share my grumble. It really annoys me when I'm sat in a restaurant and people think it's acceptable to blow their nose.

• 33:32Ant McPartlin?

  It's absolutely disgusting. Please just go to the toilet and do it. What are your thoughts? Sally from Cleethorpes. Sally, you're absolutely wrong. Of course you can blow your nose in a restaurant. With a hanky.

• 33:44Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah. Not just a footballers. A footballer's snort. Yeah, absolutely. I love a nose blow.

• 33:51Ant McPartlin?

  I love blowing my nose.

• 33:53Declan Donnelly?

  I love blowing my nose.

• 33:53Ant McPartlin?

  It's such a good feeling.

• 33:54Declan Donnelly?

  So satisfying.

• 33:56Ant McPartlin?

  I blow my nose a lot.

• 33:57Declan Donnelly?

  Do you?

• 33:58Ant McPartlin?

  I love it.

• 34:00Ant McPartlin?

  I love it.

• 34:01Speaker 04

  Have you ever blowed too hard you got dizzy?

• 34:02Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah. Yep, I've blown, then blown the other nostril and I thought, I'm going again. And then a surprise bit comes out at the end.

• 34:10Speaker 04

  You always do single nostrils?

• 34:11Ant McPartlin?

  Always do single nostrils.

• 34:12Speaker 04

  You never do them both at the same time?

• 34:13Ant McPartlin?

  No, I never do this. Your brains could come out. Never do the same both at the same time.

• 34:19Declan Donnelly?

  I do them at the same time.

• 34:20Ant McPartlin?

  What? How do you do it then?

• 34:22Declan Donnelly?

  You just go.

• 34:28Speaker 04

  What do you mean?

• 34:29Ant McPartlin?

  I just don't get it. I've never blown my nose like that.

• 34:33Declan Donnelly?

  Have you not?

• 34:33Ant McPartlin?

  Never.

• 34:34Declan Donnelly?

  Give it a try. Satisfying.

• 34:37Ant McPartlin?

  I don't know if I will. Because I love the way I do it so much. Why would I change it? I mean, all right, I'll try. Do you do single? You must do single.

• 34:46Declan Donnelly?

  I start with a double, then I go single, single, single, single, single, single, single. And then maybe finish off with a bump. With a little oink at the end.

• 34:54Speaker 04

  And when you do a double, are you press, press, press, press?

• 34:56Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah. Which sometimes I make my ears pop. But I love it. And sometimes when you're in a restaurant.

• 35:00Ant McPartlin?

  It's good chat, isn't it? It's just good chat.

• 35:03Declan Donnelly?

  Sometimes when you're in a restaurant as well, and if you had something a little bit spicy and it makes your nose go, doesn't it?

• 35:07Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah.

• 35:08Declan Donnelly?

  You need to blow your nose. I love that. Who sent that?

• 35:11Ant McPartlin?

  Sally from Cleethorpes. Respectative guys, she said, Sally, you're wrong.

• 35:16Declan Donnelly?

  With respectative, you're wrong. Let us know what you think as well. Are we on the right side of history here with this or on the wrong side? Let us know.

• 35:24Ant McPartlin?

  My wife can't really blow her nose.

• 35:26Declan Donnelly?

  What do you mean?

• 35:27Ant McPartlin?

  She can't really do it. She hates doing it and she can't really.

• 35:31Declan Donnelly?

  She's not very good at it?

• 35:32Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, she's like, I'm not sure what you do. I said, what? How can you get to 50 year old and not really know how to do it?

• 35:39Declan Donnelly?

  She'll thank you for that.

• 35:40Ant McPartlin?

  What?

• 35:44Ant McPartlin?

  Forty eight.

• 35:45Declan Donnelly?

  She just needs to practise more.

• 35:46Ant McPartlin?

  I said that, but she didn't like it. Because no, not into it. She's not into blowing her nose. She doesn't love it as much as we do.

• 35:53Declan Donnelly?

  Hi, Anton Deck and Heckler's Corner.

• 35:55Ant McPartlin?

  Hello, hello, hi.

• 35:56Declan Donnelly?

  Hey. Here's my grumble. It's very rare for something not to annoy me whilst driving, but two of my biggest bugbears have to be people who don't indicate yes. And people who don't give you a little thank you when you let them go, yes.

• 36:09Ant McPartlin?

  See?

• 36:11Declan Donnelly?

  I find both things incredibly annoying and I can't help but wonder if these people also get annoyed when someone else doesn't indicate or say thanks? Or are they just so oblivious to the other drivers that they share the road with? What are your biggest grievances on the road? Respect guys, Hannah Clark. Well Hannah, I think you've hit the nail on the head there. What effort does it take just to go? Thanks. Just to raise your little hand?

• 36:34Ant McPartlin?

  I agree.

• 36:35Declan Donnelly?

  To thank people for not letting you out?

• 36:37Ant McPartlin?

  I agree.

• 36:37Declan Donnelly?

  Happens a lot, that. And indicating as well, I hate that. But sometimes when people do, you know, you're sat at a junction and there's somebody coming along the road and they haven't indicated and they turn left. I sometimes beep the horn and I put my arms up like that, like going.

• 36:50Ant McPartlin?

  What, like that emoji?

• 36:51Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 36:51Ant McPartlin?

  Why emoji?

• 36:52Declan Donnelly?

  Why? Why didn't you indicate? I sometimes do that in a passive aggressive manner.

• 36:58Ant McPartlin?

  And do you feel better because you do that?

• 36:59Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah, I do.

• 37:00Ant McPartlin?

  Good.

• 37:00Declan Donnelly?

  Especially when I think that they've seen me.

• 37:02Ant McPartlin?

  What? That they know to you?

• 37:04Declan Donnelly?

  No, no, that they've just seen somebody go.

• 37:05Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, I thought you meant like.

• 37:06Declan Donnelly?

  Because then in my mind.

• 37:07Ant McPartlin?

  To get a disapproving passive aggressive gesture from Deck, that's going to go a long way. That's going to marinate with them for the rest of the day.

• 37:15Declan Donnelly?

  It just makes me happy knowing that they've driven off, they've seen it. And in my head, I think they feel really bad.

• 37:20Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, I bet they do.

• 37:21Declan Donnelly?

  And they regret their actions. And they will always indicate from that point on. So I've changed the world for the better in just a little bit, but I've made a positive change to society.

• 37:30Ant McPartlin?

  Good.

• 37:30Declan Donnelly?

  Well done Hannah, great grumble.

• 37:33Ant McPartlin?

  And finally, hi Anton Deck and obviously the wonderful Heckler's Corner. Hey. Is it just me? But does anyone else hate it when people, silly gooses, butter their toast and decide to scrape the excess butter back into the tub? Wipe the knife with a towel or even better, put it in the wash. What's the matter with people? Respect guys, loving the podcast, Andy Rafton from Beedle.

• 38:01Declan Donnelly?

  Well done Andy.

• 38:01Ant McPartlin?

  I bet you've got a thought too about this.

• 38:04Declan Donnelly?

  Why do you think that?

• 38:05Ant McPartlin?

  Because I'm making you up.

• 38:07Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah, you don't want to open up your butter and have loads of.

• 38:13Ant McPartlin?

  Crumbs.

• 38:13Declan Donnelly?

  Bready crumbs in there.

• 38:14Ant McPartlin?

  No, you don't want that.

• 38:15Declan Donnelly?

  You don't want that.

• 38:16Ant McPartlin?

  I'm on your side there, Andy.

• 38:17Declan Donnelly?

  Absolutely not. Well done Andy, that is a great grumble.

• 38:21Ant McPartlin?

  Good grumble.

• 38:22Declan Donnelly?

  We need to stop doing that. Also, you need to know how much butter it takes to butter a slice of toast. Like, why are you putting so much butter on that? You have to scrape some off. What are you thinking? Everybody knows it's just a knob of butter. Just don't take too big a knob.

• 38:38Ant McPartlin?

  All valid grumbles this week.

• 38:40Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 38:40Ant McPartlin?

  Apart from Sally from Cleethorpes.

• 38:43Declan Donnelly?

  Sorry, Sal.

• 38:43Speaker 04

  I've got one more.

• 38:44Ant McPartlin?

  Okay, go on.

• 38:45Speaker 04

  From maybe a familiar voice.

• 38:46Declan Donnelly?

  Okay.

• 38:47Speaker 05

  Hello Anton Deck. My grumble, I mean, I've got several grumbles. One of my biggest things I absolutely hate is the song Lady in Red by Krista Berg. Now, I'm sure he is a lovely man, but there is a line where he sings, never have I seen you looking so gorgeous as you did tonight. And the highlights in your hair took my breath away. That is peroxide. How can anybody put that into a song lyric? Thank you. Thank you for helping me get this off my chest.

• 39:19Ant McPartlin?

  Thanks Amanda.

• 39:19Declan Donnelly?

  That's Amanda Holden.

• 39:21Speaker 04

  That is Amanda Holden.

• 39:22Ant McPartlin?

  Thanks Amanda.

• 39:22Declan Donnelly?

  Grumbling about highlights. I'd never thought of that.

• 39:25Ant McPartlin?

  It's very specific Amanda.

• 39:27Declan Donnelly?

  But also they might be really nice subtle highlights.

• 39:30Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah.

• 39:31Declan Donnelly?

  But they've been done really nicely.

• 39:34Ant McPartlin?

  And she might be thrilled with them. She might make those highlights.

• 39:36Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 39:37Ant McPartlin?

  So she might just got them done and she's like, oh my God, these highlights are amazing. And him saying, they took my breath away. Validates her choice of highlight, you know? She's like, yeah. Don't know.

• 39:48Speaker 04

  Does he say that the highlights took her breath?

• 39:50Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, yeah, he does.

• 39:52Declan Donnelly?

  He says, I've never seen that dress. No, no, no, no, no. He goes, I've never seen that dress you're wearing. All the highlights in your hair that catch your eyes. I have been blind. He doesn't even say if they're nice or not, he just says.

• 40:06Ant McPartlin?

  But he has seen them all before. He has.

• 40:09Declan Donnelly?

  He has, but he's never noticed them.

• 40:10Ant McPartlin?

  That's the difference.

• 40:11Declan Donnelly?

  Is that what he's saying?

• 40:12Ant McPartlin?

  That's what he's saying. He's been blind to all of this. He's seen, she's had those highlights for ages. They're really dull now. And the dress isn't new. She's had it for years. But he hasn't noticed before because he's a typical man.

• 40:26Declan Donnelly?

  What a pig. Krista Berg's an absolute pig.

• 40:33Declan Donnelly?

  I don't really think that Chris, I think you're wonderful.

• 40:37Declan Donnelly?

  Right, who gets grumbler of the week? Who did some good morning this week?

• 40:41Ant McPartlin?

  I can't, sorry man, I don't think it can be you. But please send me more. Or just talk to us, we're here.

• 40:46Declan Donnelly?

  Who, Amanda?

• 40:47Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah.

• 40:48Declan Donnelly?

  She's only over there.

• 40:49Ant McPartlin?

  She's round the corner, she just need to do this, you know? I appreciate this, you know, but just call us.

• 40:55Declan Donnelly?

  Interesting grumble though. My vote this week goes for Hannah Clark for ungrateful drivers.

• 40:59Ant McPartlin?

  Agreed.

• 41:00Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah, do that.

• 41:01Ant McPartlin?

  I'm for that.

• 41:02Declan Donnelly?

  Well done Hannah Clark, you win a big thumbs up as morning mini of the week. Well done Hannah.

• 41:09Speaker 04

  And a cheeky face?

• 41:10Ant McPartlin?

  What's that?

• 41:10Speaker 04

  And a cheeky face?

• 41:11Ant McPartlin?

  And a cheeky face. And a wink.

• 41:15Declan Donnelly?

  If you.

• 41:15Ant McPartlin?

  And Deck doing that.

• 41:17Declan Donnelly?

  Come on.

• 41:17Ant McPartlin?

  Come on.

• 41:18Declan Donnelly?

  If you've got any grumbles, send them in to us, [email protected] and you too could get a thumb, cheeky face and a wink.

• 41:28Declan Donnelly?

  This next bit is brought to you by Gemini, Google's AI app. We have got a very long flight ahead of us.

• 41:35Ant McPartlin?

  Yes, we do.

• 41:35Declan Donnelly?

  Coming up because we're going to Australia.

• 41:37Ant McPartlin?

  What are you doing on the flight?

• 41:38Declan Donnelly?

  You know me, a little Sudoku, I catch up on my Sudoku.

• 41:42Ant McPartlin?

  For 20 hours?

• 41:43Declan Donnelly?

  No, not always, you know, sometimes I'll do a word search. I always do that thing like, is it bad to sleep now? Is it good to sleep now? Twenty odd years and I still don't know the best way of doing it.

• 41:53Ant McPartlin?

  Just so happens, we've got Google Gemini. I can ask some questions if you'd like.

• 41:58Declan Donnelly?

  Yes, let's try and put a plan together.

• 41:59Ant McPartlin?

  Okay, let's do that.

• 42:00Declan Donnelly?

  And at least gives me a better idea of when I should be doing stuff. When should I do so? Do go.

• 42:04Ant McPartlin?

  I'll ask the questions to Gemini. Hi Gemini, I'm here. I'm tackling the massive flight from London to Australia soon. And I want to dodge the jet lag. So what would you recommend? If I take off from London at ATM UK time and the whole journey, including layovers, is 24 hours. Can you build me a game plan? Best times to sleep, how to dodge the jet lag, et cetera, et cetera. Any pro tips please? Aha, I've got some answers.

• 42:38Declan Donnelly?

  Good.

• 42:39Ant McPartlin?

  Uh, you are crossing roughly nine to 11 time zones.

• 42:43Declan Donnelly?

  Is that really?

• 42:43Ant McPartlin?

  Did you know that?

• 42:44Declan Donnelly?

  I did not know that.

• 42:44Ant McPartlin?

  I didn't know that either. That's crazy. Meaning your body clock is going to be severely scrambled.

• 42:50Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah, man.

• 42:51Ant McPartlin?

  That's right. So the first leg, you need to stay awake through most of the initial stretch. Matching the daylight. Set your watch immediately to your destination's local time.

• 43:01Declan Donnelly?

  Right. Now, this is a good tip because I never knew this, whether I should be still doing stuff on where I've taken off.

• 43:07Ant McPartlin?

  No, that's the past. That's the past. You live in the past.

• 43:11Declan Donnelly?

  Okay.

• 43:11Ant McPartlin?

  You want to move to the future. Binge movies. Ah, you see, doesn't say Sudoku. Have your main sleep on the second leg.

• 43:18Declan Donnelly?

  Right.

• 43:19Ant McPartlin?

  Do you do that?

• 43:19Declan Donnelly?

  I don't know. I just sleep whenever.

• 43:21Ant McPartlin?

  Right, okay.

• 43:22Declan Donnelly?

  I never know.

• 43:23Ant McPartlin?

  Do your second movie binge. Play games. Keep your brain active. Oh, God.

• 43:28Declan Donnelly?

  Sudoku!

• 43:29Ant McPartlin?

  You put that in there, didn't you? Um, pro tips for survival. When you land in Australia, go outside immediately. And get as much natural sunlight as possible. Do not go straight to bed, even if you're a little bit tired.

• 43:42Declan Donnelly?

  No.

• 43:42Ant McPartlin?

  You're just not even a lot of that.

• 43:43Declan Donnelly?

  No, you need, you, you need to reset your circadian rhythms.

• 43:46Ant McPartlin?

  Hmm.

• 43:46Declan Donnelly?

  I know that.

• 43:47Ant McPartlin?

  Let's, let's deep dive more into this. Hi, Gemini. And again, you mentioned trying to stay awake into the first evening. Uh, can you find us a few Chinese restaurants?

• 43:56Declan Donnelly?

  Yes, please.

• 43:56Ant McPartlin?

  Um, that will serve food earlier in the evening, uh, near a hotel in Brisbane, please, uh, to keep us busy. And include some highlights from the menus, uh, so we can choose before we get there.

• 44:09Declan Donnelly?

  Why not? This is prone toast for me.

• 44:12Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, look, there's loads. Look how many, look.

• 44:16Declan Donnelly?

  So that many around there?

• 44:17Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, this one, this one, this one, this one. Kumon spiced lamb ribs. Almond-fed chow-sue pork neck with honey glaze and Szechuan kung po chicken.

• 44:28Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, put me in. This is dreamy.

• 44:31Ant McPartlin?

  It's good though, isn't it?

• 44:31Declan Donnelly?

  This is the first time I'll be going to Australia with a proper plan to minimise my jet lag.

• 44:36Ant McPartlin?

  We might not get jet lag.

• 44:37Declan Donnelly?

  My God, that's amazing.

• 44:38Ant McPartlin?

  We'll report back. We'll report back on this.

• 44:40Declan Donnelly?

  We'll let you know.

• 44:41Ant McPartlin?

  Thanks, Gemini. Love, Ant.

• 44:42Declan Donnelly?

  Download the Gemini app today to unlock the power of Google AI on your phone.

• 44:47Ant McPartlin?

  Results for illustrative purposes. Check responses. Senate required. Compatibility and availability varies. 18 plus.

• 44:57Ant McPartlin?

  Did you know that we were once asked to become judges on BGT?

• 45:03Declan Donnelly?

  Simon Cowell rang us up one day.

• 45:04Ant McPartlin?

  A few on his face. That was it. We're genuine shock there.

• 45:06Speaker 04

  Are you gonna sit on the same?

• 45:08Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah, on the, on the, on the desk.

• 45:09Speaker 04

  Like with a double seat?

• 45:10Ant McPartlin?

  Well, not on the same, not like a double, not like a, it wouldn't be like a love seat.

• 45:15Declan Donnelly?

  Simon Cowell rang us up. We were in LA?

• 45:18Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah.

• 45:19Declan Donnelly?

  We were in LA on the way to Australia. We went the wrong way around the world and stopped off in LA for a couple of days. Cause we had loads of friends that moved out to LA for a bit. So we went and stayed with some friends. And then went on to Australia and he called us up while we were in LA. And he said, um, I've been thinking, I've got a plan for the next series. I think it's time you stopped hosting the show. And came over to the dark side. He says, I think you should be judges on the show. We're like, oh, leave it with us. We'll have a chat. We'll have a think. And, uh, kind of spent 24 hours thinking about it, talking about it.

• 45:50Ant McPartlin?

  We did think about it.

• 45:51Declan Donnelly?

  Didn't take us very long to decide no. And we called them back the next day and we said, look, we enjoy what we do too much in the wings with the act. So respectfully, no.

• 45:59Ant McPartlin?

  Cause we're on their side and, and it, it's very hard to go from being by the side of the stage on the act side. You know, really rooting for them to, to, we, we did it once. We stood in for like an hour in the chair. Do you remember?

• 46:14Declan Donnelly?

  Hmm.

• 46:15Ant McPartlin?

  And just, I didn't like it. Maybe that'll change over time. As you get older, you might, you know, you might feel like you'll want to sit in the chair and, you know, you. It's easier to critique. Yeah, have a sit down. As you get older, you might want to sit down. When I'm, when I'm not doing as much Pilates and yoga, I want to sit down more. But yeah, we're quite happy in the, in the wings.

• 46:32Declan Donnelly?

  But sometimes as well, we stand in the wings and we watch the acts and, you know, some of them, they're not all brilliant. Sometimes you stand there and you're halfway through and you go, I'm glad I don't have to say anything at the end of this. I'm glad I don't have to critique this. And I'm always quite interested in how the judges frame it. So yeah, sometimes. I'm glad we don't have to think of something to say. I couldn't, I, it's not in me to be too harsh to them either.

• 46:56Ant McPartlin?

  Now, and sometimes when you've seen the same style of act again and again and again. Like you say, I'd be at a loss to think of something different. And that's why I think the judges are good on BGT. Because they all think of something different to say to the acts. Like Simon is really good. That's why he's the best at it. And you know, Amanda and Alicia just come out with stuff. You go, oh yeah, I wouldn't have thought of that. I wouldn't have, you know, they've got a perspective from musical theatre or from dance or whatever. I don't necessarily want to be in that chair.

• 47:27Speaker 04

  How would you feel about doing some judging now though?

• 47:30Ant McPartlin?

  What, for fun?

• 47:31Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 47:32Declan Donnelly?

  Who are you judging, you guys?

• 47:33Speaker 04

  Well, our listeners have sent us in some impressions.

• 47:37Declan Donnelly?

  Ah.

• 47:38Ant McPartlin?

  Okay.

• 47:38Speaker 04

  Maybe you could give a little banana rating?

• 47:40Declan Donnelly?

  Yes, please.

• 47:41Ant McPartlin?

  Banana rate, anything. That's easy. Like, if I get, if I could be a judge on BGT and just rate them bananas, I would do it.

• 47:48Speaker 04

  Oh, that's the key.

• 47:49Ant McPartlin?

  That's the key. Maybe that's why I shouldn't have sent it to Simon all those years ago.

• 47:53Declan Donnelly?

  Banana's.

• 47:54Ant McPartlin?

  All right, play them then.

• 47:55Speaker 04

  Are you ready for this?

• 47:56Ant McPartlin?

  Yes.

• 47:56Speaker 04

  These are impressions sent in by our lovely listeners.

• 47:59Speaker 05

  Hi, I'm Abby and this is my impression of a grown tube. Ooh, ow, ooh, ow, ooh, ow. Or you can have a small one as well. Ooh, the, ow, ooh, the, ow, ooh, the, ow.

• 48:16Declan Donnelly?

  Abby.

• 48:16Ant McPartlin?

  That's very good.

• 48:17Declan Donnelly?

  That's amazing.

• 48:18Ant McPartlin?

  That's like, that's the, I, I actually thought it was one of, what are they called? Grown tube. I never knew what they were called.

• 48:24Declan Donnelly?

  It was so good, I.

• 48:25Ant McPartlin?

  Ooh, ow, ooh, ow. Uh, oh, hold on, we can all do it. Ooh, ow, ooh, ooh, ow.

• 48:31Declan Donnelly?

  Now hers is, hers is tonally. She's got the right note for it.

• 48:37Ant McPartlin?

  That's pretty good.

• 48:40Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, I'm as good as that as I am at playing paddle.

• 48:44Declan Donnelly?

  She was so good. I suspect she may have had a grown tube in the background.

• 48:47Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, we don't know.

• 48:48Declan Donnelly?

  We can't prove it. But Abby, that is brilliant.

• 48:50Ant McPartlin?

  Air bananas.

• 48:50Declan Donnelly?

  It's air bananas.

• 48:51Speaker 04

  All right, another one.

• 48:52Speaker 06

  Hi, Ant, Deck and Heckler's Corner. I'm Betsy and I just started sending my impression of an owl.

• 49:01Speaker 06

  There we go. What do you think?

• 49:03Ant McPartlin?

  It's very quick.

• 49:06Ant McPartlin?

  Very quick, Betsy.

• 49:07Declan Donnelly?

  It, it just flew down and then it's gone again. It just came in for a quick woo and it's gone.

• 49:12Ant McPartlin?

  It didn't want to stop and chat. It was just said hi.

• 49:15Declan Donnelly?

  It was very good, Betsy.

• 49:16Ant McPartlin?

  It was good. I used to, in my old house, there was an owl that lived nearby and it would. What? There was?

• 49:25Speaker 04

  Next door?

• 49:26Ant McPartlin?

  No.

• 49:27Declan Donnelly?

  In a, in a house?

• 49:27Ant McPartlin?

  It's not in a house, you fools.

• 49:29Speaker 04

  Next door to an owl.

• 49:30Ant McPartlin?

  Shut up! I love this owl. I love animals. This owl flew around and every now and again, I would hear it. And it would hoot and I'd go, hoo, hoo, back. And then it would, it was almost like we had a conversation.

• 49:45Declan Donnelly?

  What did it say?

• 49:46Ant McPartlin?

  And, huh?

• 49:47Declan Donnelly?

  What?

• 49:48Ant McPartlin?

  I said it was almost like we had a conversation. Obviously, we don't speak the same language.

• 49:55Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 49:55Ant McPartlin?

  But I, I suspect it was saying, hi, how are you doing, Ant? You all right?

• 49:59Declan Donnelly?

  How's Britain's Got Talent going?

• 50:02Ant McPartlin?

  I've talked to an owl firsthand, so I know what an owl sounds like.

• 50:05Speaker 04

  Do we listen to see what this one's saying?

• 50:07Ant McPartlin?

  It's too quick. And it's, it's too quick and it's not an owl.

• 50:10Speaker 04

  Oh, fine, of course.

• 50:11Ant McPartlin?

  And the gaps between the, play it again.

• 50:16Speaker 06

  There we go. What do you think?

• 50:19Ant McPartlin?

  The gaps between the woo's, it's very short.

• 50:22Declan Donnelly?

  Again, it's so good. I think she may have an owl there.

• 50:24Speaker 04

  What's your banana rating?

• 50:26Declan Donnelly?

  Six.

• 50:26Ant McPartlin?

  From experience, I'm, I'm giving that a, a four.

• 50:29Declan Donnelly?

  Oh.

• 50:30Speaker 04

  Wow.

• 50:30Declan Donnelly?

  Six for me.

• 50:31Speaker 04

  Okay.

• 50:32Declan Donnelly?

  But it's a bit, it's a bit, it's a bit whistly. It's a bit, it's a bit.

• 50:35Ant McPartlin?

  It is a bit whistly, isn't it?

• 50:35Declan Donnelly?

  It's a bit like.

• 50:36Ant McPartlin?

  Through our fingers.

• 50:37Declan Donnelly?

  Woo hoo.

• 50:38Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah.

• 50:38Declan Donnelly?

  Kind of. It's good though.

• 50:40Speaker 04

  Okay.

• 50:40Declan Donnelly?

  Six. Six bananas.

• 50:42Speaker 04

  Good to the groin. Okay, this is from Claire.

• 50:44Ant McPartlin?

  Pikachu!

• 50:47Declan Donnelly?

  Pikachu?

• 50:48Ant McPartlin?

  Pikachu! Pikachu. And that was an impression of us?

• 50:53Declan Donnelly?

  No, that was just an impression of Pikachu.

• 50:54Speaker 04

  That's the impression.

• 50:55Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, that was Pikachu?

• 50:56Speaker 04

  That was Claire.

• 50:57Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, no, I know about it. How can such a simple item be so complicated in execution?

• 51:04Declan Donnelly?

  Was that actually Pikachu? Is Claire Pikachu in the cartoons?

• 51:07Speaker 04

  I don't know.

• 51:08Declan Donnelly?

  No, I don't think so.

• 51:09Ant McPartlin?

  Or is she us doing it on Saturday?

• 51:11Declan Donnelly?

  No, she's just Pikachu.

• 51:12Speaker 04

  She's just Claire.

• 51:13Declan Donnelly?

  From, from.

• 51:14Ant McPartlin?

  See, there's too many questions in there. There's, there's too many questions.

• 51:17Declan Donnelly?

  She didn't really give any preamble, did she?

• 51:19Speaker 04

  How many bananas?

• 51:21Ant McPartlin?

  Six.

• 51:22Speaker 04

  Fine. One more?

• 51:23Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 51:23Speaker 04

  Okay, this is Sammy. See if you can guess what this is an impression of.

• 51:30Declan Donnelly?

  So that's supposed to be a horse?

• 51:31Ant McPartlin?

  That's never a horse.

• 51:33Declan Donnelly?

  Sammy.

• 51:33Ant McPartlin?

  Play it again.

• 51:37Declan Donnelly?

  It sounds more like you've seen a spider.

• 51:41Ant McPartlin?

  Uh, no.

• 51:42Declan Donnelly?

  No, Sammy.

• 51:43Ant McPartlin?

  No bananas.

• 51:43Speaker 04

  No bananas?

• 51:44Ant McPartlin?

  No, no bananas.

• 51:45Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, three.

• 51:46Ant McPartlin?

  Toss a few bananas.

• 51:47Declan Donnelly?

  Toss her a couple of bananas.

• 51:48Speaker 04

  Okay, fine. So we're just taking the grown tube through to the live show.

• 51:51Declan Donnelly?

  Grown tube.

• 51:52Ant McPartlin?

  The grown tube.

• 51:53Declan Donnelly?

  You're through to the live shows.

• 51:54Ant McPartlin?

  Maybe even our golden buzzer. We're gonna give the grown, the grown tube.

• 51:58Declan Donnelly?

  Hold, hold your golden buzzer.

• 51:59Ant McPartlin?

  Why?

• 52:00Declan Donnelly?

  There'll be something better along. I'm sure of it. They're great though, great talents.

• 52:04Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, very good. You should send more in. Happy to do that. Happy to be judges when we can rate them, don't we?

• 52:09Declan Donnelly?

  Yes.

• 52:09Ant McPartlin?

  Please send in your auditions.

• 52:11Declan Donnelly?

  Aud, auditions. I like it.

• 52:13Ant McPartlin?

  Auditions.

• 52:13Declan Donnelly?

  Send them in to us. Anything at all you like. Impressions are good. Would you have any singers?

• 52:18Ant McPartlin?

  No.

• 52:21Declan Donnelly?

  Not bothered about singers?

• 52:22Ant McPartlin?

  Unless you can sing really well, like somebody famous.

• 52:26Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, singing impressions?

• 52:27Ant McPartlin?

  Yes.

• 52:27Declan Donnelly?

  Singing impressions would be good.

• 52:29Speaker 04

  Like you and Cher?

• 52:30Declan Donnelly?

  Like my Cher?

• 52:31Ant McPartlin?

  You and Cher?

• 52:32Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, Cher. Do you believe in love or love? Yeah. Any singing impressions? Send them in. What about jokes? Do we like jokes?

• 52:39Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, we like jokes.

• 52:41Speaker 04

  As impressions?

• 52:42Ant McPartlin?

  No, no, no.

• 52:43Declan Donnelly?

  Just some jokes, just some comedy.

• 52:44Ant McPartlin?

  Funny jokes, shorts, funny jokes.

• 52:45Speaker 04

  And Al telling a joke?

• 52:47Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 52:47Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, great. I can understand that.

• 52:49Declan Donnelly?

  Anything. Send them in. [email protected].

• 52:51Speaker 04

  We'll take anything.

• 52:52Ant McPartlin?

  We'll ta, we'll take anything.

• 52:55Declan Donnelly?

  Before we go, we've got some time for some questions from the broadcast channel. If you're not on the broadcast channel yet, well, how do they do it, Fiona?

• 53:03Declan Donnelly?

  Come and join our broadcast channel on Instagram and you can interact with us and get some questions on the pod. You go to our profile on Instagram, click on what?

• 53:12Speaker 04

  Your bio, on your bio.

• 53:14Declan Donnelly?

  Click on the bio, LinkedIn bio, hanging out, join the broadcast channel. Can I start?

• 53:19Ant McPartlin?

  Yes, you can.

• 53:20Declan Donnelly?

  I've got one from Maisy Peacock 2008, who says, scones, jam then cream or cream then jam?

• 53:27Ant McPartlin?

  Um.

• 53:28Declan Donnelly?

  One of, one of them's the Devon way and one of them's the Cornwall way. I don't know which way.

• 53:31Ant McPartlin?

  I don't know which, do you know which way, round it is?

• 53:33Speaker 04

  Jam first is Cornwall, cream first is Devon.

• 53:37Declan Donnelly?

  So you think, you think Cornwall is jam then cream and Devon is cream?

• 53:40Speaker 04

  Yeah, Cornwall is when you spread the jam like butter and in Devon you spread the cream like butter.

• 53:44Ant McPartlin?

  Right, right.

• 53:46Declan Donnelly?

  I hope you're right, because there'll be letters.

• 53:47Speaker 04

  Me too.

• 53:48Declan Donnelly?

  Which way do you do it? How do you do it?

• 53:51Ant McPartlin?

  I don't know.

• 53:51Declan Donnelly?

  I have quite strong feelings about this.

• 53:52Ant McPartlin?

  Do you? Go on.

• 53:53Declan Donnelly?

  Cream then jam. The cream is like butter because it's buttery, creamy, and then you put the jam on top. So cream then jam.

• 53:59Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, I think I do, I think I do that. I think, I think I do cream first, dollop of jam.

• 54:04Declan Donnelly?

  Dollop of jam on the top?

• 54:04Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah.

• 54:05Declan Donnelly?

  Otherwise, the jam gets overpowered by the cream when you really want that sharp, sweet strawberry jammy taste, not the creamy taste.

• 54:14Ant McPartlin?

  So would that make you Devon or Cornwall?

• 54:17Declan Donnelly?

  According to Jemima, I'm Devonian.

• 54:19Ant McPartlin?

  Devonian. I like it. I've got one from Megang2025. If you were to lose a toe, which toe would you lose? Good question.

• 54:27Declan Donnelly?

  Good one. One of the middle ones.

• 54:29Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah.

• 54:29Declan Donnelly?

  Two, three or four?

• 54:30Ant McPartlin?

  One of the ones, I don't, wouldn't, not two, three, right in the middle.

• 54:34Declan Donnelly?

  That one?

• 54:34Ant McPartlin?

  I don't think you'd, I don't think you'd miss that.

• 54:36Declan Donnelly?

  Apparently you don't want to lose the little one, do you? Is that the balancey one?

• 54:39Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, I think so.

• 54:39Declan Donnelly?

  And your big one, you're in all sorts of trouble.

• 54:41Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, you don't want to lose a big toe.

• 54:42Declan Donnelly?

  Higgya Herin. I don't know if that's a proper name. I'm currently doing my year abroad in Japan. I'm feeling very homesick and watching the pod makes me feel so much better. Got any advice there in Japan?

• 54:55Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah.

• 54:55Declan Donnelly?

  We loved it in Japan.

• 54:57Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah.

• 54:57Declan Donnelly?

  Now, here's a bit of advice for you. When we went to Japan, we were like 19 maybe, 1920? Not in 1920, we were 19 or 20 in 1990. In 1994, 95. And we went to Japan and we loved it. It was incredible. But we were too scared to try the food.

• 55:14Ant McPartlin?

  I know.

• 55:15Declan Donnelly?

  We were, we hadn't really done Japanese food before. We'd never really had sushi. So I would say immerse yourself in the culture.

• 55:24Ant McPartlin?

  I agree.

• 55:25Declan Donnelly?

  Try everything. Don't do what we did in that we went to the hotel reception and got them, the receptionist to write on a card, take me to McDonald's and then we showed it to the taxi driver.

• 55:35Ant McPartlin?

  In Japanese.

• 55:36Declan Donnelly?

  And he took us to the, um, McDonald's. We pointed at the pictures of stuff we wanted to eat. We sat there in silence and ate the McDonald's, then went back to the taxi rank, turned the card over and showed them the address of the hotel and they drove us back to the hotel.

• 55:50Ant McPartlin?

  I agree.

• 55:50Declan Donnelly?

  We didn't really appreciate the local culture as much. So go for it, immerse yourself, try all the food.

• 55:56Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah. Be thankful, be thankful you're in Japan. Be, be grateful. Just, just, just try new things, broaden your horizons.

• 56:04Declan Donnelly?

  Make memories.

• 56:05Ant McPartlin?

  You'll be, you'll have a fuller, richer life because of it.

• 56:08Declan Donnelly?

  Make memories and gather stories.

• 56:10Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah.

• 56:11Declan Donnelly?

  For when you get home.

• 56:11Ant McPartlin?

  Meet people, talk to people. If you're, if you're homesick, you're missing comfort, I think. And I think comfort comes from connection and talking to others. So get out there and meet new people. Listen to the pod, obviously. And we do that. But once you've finished that, then, you know, get out and, get out and try new stuff.

• 56:30Declan Donnelly?

  And you'll be home soon enough. So just make sure you come back with tons of memories and tons of stories to tell everybody when you get back.

• 56:35Ant McPartlin?

  This, this one is from Sue with lots of numbers after her name. Hi, Declan.

• 56:40Declan Donnelly?

  Hi, Sue.

• 56:40Ant McPartlin?

  Uh, what's it like having a footballer in the family who plays in the Scottish Championship with Dunfermline? Did you know? Did you know that?

• 56:49Declan Donnelly?

  I did not know that. Is that a thing? I haven't, I, I don't. Is that a, what is that?

• 56:55Speaker 04

  So now I just thought maybe you had a relative.

• 56:58Declan Donnelly?

  No.

• 56:59Speaker 04

  No?

• 56:59Declan Donnelly?

  Not that I know of.

• 57:00Ant McPartlin?

  Well, you, you must be related.

• 57:01Declan Donnelly?

  There must be.

• 57:02Speaker 04

  What's the, what's the club?

• 57:03Declan Donnelly?

  Dunfermline.

• 57:03Ant McPartlin?

  Dunfermline.

• 57:04Declan Donnelly?

  Is there a player called?

• 57:05Ant McPartlin?

  Obviously Donnelly.

• 57:05Declan Donnelly?

  Donnelly and Dunfermline.

• 57:07Speaker 04

  Aaron Donnelly?

• 57:08Declan Donnelly?

  Aaron Donnelly? Am I related to him?

• 57:11Speaker 04

  He is, was born in Newcastle and is related to Declan Donnelly.

• 57:16Ant McPartlin?

  There you go, see?

• 57:21Ant McPartlin?

  Did he write his own bio?

• 57:23Speaker 04

  Okay, this is Wikipedia.

• 57:25Ant McPartlin?

  Go on.

• 57:25Speaker 04

  Aaron Martin Donnelly was born on the 8th of June, 2003 in Magherafelt.

• 57:31Declan Donnelly?

  Maharafelt.

• 57:32Speaker 04

  Thank you, to Noel and Martina. He has family from Newcastle upon Tyne.

• 57:37Ant McPartlin?

  Uh huh.

• 57:37Speaker 04

  And is related to Declan Donnelly. He played Gaelic football as a forward growing up.

• 57:42Declan Donnelly?

  I did, I didn't. I didn't play Gaelic football.

• 57:45Ant McPartlin?

  He did.

• 57:45Declan Donnelly?

  Aaron did. Is, is he related to me? Noel and Martina?

• 57:49Speaker 04

  Do you know Noel and Martina?

• 57:50Declan Donnelly?

  Maybe they're cousins of mine.

• 57:51Ant McPartlin?

  You might be related.

• 57:52Declan Donnelly?

  I might be.

• 57:53Ant McPartlin?

  We should get him on the pod for a chat.

• 57:54Declan Donnelly?

  Surprise, surprise, he's here tonight.

• 57:58Declan Donnelly?

  Maybe I am.

• 57:59Speaker 04

  Donnelly is a left-sided defender.

• 58:01Declan Donnelly?

  Okay.

• 58:02Speaker 04

  Who is aggressive.

• 58:03Declan Donnelly?

  Yes.

• 58:03Speaker 04

  In both defence and attack.

• 58:05Declan Donnelly?

  I, we are related.

• 58:06Speaker 04

  Who provides crosses going forward, along with overlaps and underlaps.

• 58:10Declan Donnelly?

  Uh huh.

• 58:11Speaker 04

  Does that sound like you?

• 58:11Declan Donnelly?

  I've got, I've got.

• 58:12Ant McPartlin?

  He's very underlappy and overlappy, Declan.

• 58:13Declan Donnelly?

  I've got overlaps and underlaps.

• 58:15Ant McPartlin?

  In him, in his locker.

• 58:16Declan Donnelly?

  Well, what do you know? Well, I'll go and look into that.

• 58:18Speaker 04

  But how does it feel having a family member in Dunfermline?

• 58:20Declan Donnelly?

  It feels very surprising.

• 58:24Ant McPartlin?

  Surprising and intriguing. We've learned so much today. We're good. Hanging out on tour is far more educational than hanging out in the studio, I think.

• 58:32Declan Donnelly?

  And the good news is, we've got another episode coming up for you on Monday, where we're gonna be answering all of your postcards and, um, some letters.

• 58:40Ant McPartlin?

  In this room?

• 58:41Declan Donnelly?

  Yes, why not?

• 58:42Ant McPartlin?

  Can I be in this room? I like this room.

• 58:43Declan Donnelly?

  Let's do it.

• 58:43Ant McPartlin?

  Good. Okay. Right. See you Monday then.

• 58:45Declan Donnelly?

  We'll do that then.

• 58:46Ant McPartlin?

  That's fun.

• 58:47Declan Donnelly?

  Keep everything coming in. Remember to give us a like and a follow, uh, wherever you get your podcasts and a subscription if you're watching on YouTube. And then we'll be back with a bonus on Monday. Until then.

• 58:55Ant McPartlin?

  Respect, guys.

• 58:56Declan Donnelly?

  Respect, guys.

• 58:57Ant McPartlin?

  Over and out.

• 58:57Declan Donnelly?

  See you later.

• 58:58Ant McPartlin?

  I'm gonna add that from now. Over and out.

• 59:14Speaker 01

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