Pod Insights Hamish & Andy 340 - Risking Bec’s Life for an AirPod About this episode Andy turns private investigator when his AirPods lead him on a stakeout through a notoriously dicey LA suburb. Hame interviews for the job of 'office's worst employee', and there's a shocking reveal in the ongoing Fisiocrem saga after a decade of the boys calling it "the world's number one creme." Plus, Upset Andy is back for a special international edition, and there's a huge (but top secret) update from the Hame's Hives world.
1. Risking Bec’s Life for an AirPod
2. Worst Employee
3. Historical Bombshell - Fisiocrem / Sudocrem
4. Upset Andy - International Edition
5. Bee World non-update
Transcript 0:02 Speaker 00 A Listener Production.
0:07 Speaker 01 Activate your internet because the Hamish and Andy podcast starts in three, two.
0:17 Speaker 01 Sorry, still buffering. One.
0:24 Speaker 02 Ahoy to my id, Hamish.
0:26 Speaker 03 Are we parts of the brain, the ego, the id, the superego, superid?
0:31 Speaker 02 That's it.
0:32 Speaker 03 Is that us?
0:32 Speaker 02 Yes.
0:33 Speaker 03 Oh mate, there we go. Parts of the psyche, is it Freud?
0:36 Speaker 02 It's the three parts of the personality according to Freudian psychology. You're right, id, you'd be my ego, Jack, and I'd be superego. Id is impulses and desires, so I reckon that matches up quite nicely.
0:48 Speaker 03 You are id, oh yeah.
0:50 Speaker 02 There used to be a cop-
0:51 Speaker 03 With the Wizard of Id over there.
0:52 Speaker 04 Yeah, the Wizard of Id, and I always thought he was the Wizard of ID until much, much too late into my adulthood.
0:58 Speaker 03 I'm four, can you get me into a club? There's only one man that could make a fake ID for a four-year-old, the Wizard of ID.
1:07 Speaker 02 So id is, I want it now, that's that part of your brain.
1:12 Speaker 03 Yeah, working on curbing that.
1:15 Speaker 02 Yes, the ego, the practical decision maker. How can I get what I want in a realistic way?
1:22 Speaker 03 Yep.
1:23 Speaker 02 That's you, Jacko, according to this order. Superego, your internal sense of right and wrong, what is the right thing to do?
1:30 Speaker 04 They all match very well.
1:32 Speaker 03 They do match very, I mean, actually kind of like freakishly well.
1:35 Speaker 02 Yes.
1:36 Speaker 03 Maybe that's why the show works.
1:39 Speaker 03 All perfectly represent the three parts of the psyche.
1:42 Speaker 02 Also, ahoy to Clancy, who went to hamishnewy.com. Anyone can head there and just upload an audio message of what they've been up to and you've got a chance to be on the show.
1:53 Speaker 05 Ahoy, Hamish, Andy and number six. I'm coming to you with a public service announcement, if you will, in particular for those Gis enthusiasts. My partner is not a Gis enthusiast. In fact, he is the polar opposite of fast and loose when it comes to his toilet habits. He likes to take, I would say, a good 10 to 20 minutes when doing a number two. Recently, we were in Adelaide for a wedding and we're on a bit of a pub crawl. We didn't have much time, so he decided to attempt his first giss. He did it.
2:32 Speaker 03 Right.
2:32 Speaker 05 However, he did feel a little bit of discomfort at the time.
2:35 Speaker 03 It will happen.
2:36 Speaker 05 Fast forward now, a week on, and he's currently in surgery to have a perianal abscess drained. So not saying that it was caused by the giss. However, I don't think it's a coincidence that he only felt the pain after his first giss. So I just wanted to let everybody know out there, all of those giss enthusiasts or the potential giss enthusiasts, just be sure that you're gissing safely.
3:04 Speaker 03 Great message. Okay, there's a lot to unpack there and not just in the sense of pus and, you know, and infection from a bum. First of all, you know, of course, we all love to spend 20 minutes on the toilet. This, I'm not doing Gone in 60 Seconds at home. No, no. This is when, if and when needs be, you have to evacuate your bowels in under 60 seconds to confuse passersby to think you couldn't have possibly pooed that fast. Yep. You must have done a wee. Therefore, even just going into the bathroom after, you'd be like, well, it wasn't that guy because he was barely in here. Yeah. So that's really the point of a giss. Now, of course, that's why I've made the instructional tapes and it's a 12, I think it's 12 cassettes in the set. You, you can't just go, oh, I'm going to have a crack at that and blow it out as hard
3:49 Speaker 03 as you can because that's what happens. We've seen someone now, a man, get injured because he tried to do a professional level
3:55 Speaker 02 Which is good to hear about the losses. You know, you always hear, you always hear about the wins, like camel head.
4:02 Speaker 03 And it's like social media. It's like, people are only putting up the fastest poos they did. What about the ones that blew, what about the ones that blew their rings apart? You know, no one shows you that side of their life, but of course it's happening and so it's good to see it.
4:15 Speaker 02 Guys, I wanted to the start of the show.
4:17 Speaker 03 Yeah, what have you done?
4:18 Speaker 02 Because I've been accused of risking Bec's life.
4:21 Speaker 03 Oh, my gosh.
4:22 Speaker 02 Which I believe.
4:23 Speaker 03 By Beck or by a passerby?
4:25 Speaker 02 Well, pretty much everyone I've told the story. No one's been on my side yet.
4:28 Speaker 03 Oh, boy. Well, good luck. We'll try our best.
4:33 Speaker 02 I think my AirPods got stolen in America. I may have misplaced them. That's it. Doesn't matter.
4:39 Speaker 03 Yep.
4:40 Speaker 02 The matter is, you can do on Find My Devices.
4:43 Speaker 03 Yep.
4:44 Speaker 02 Yep, where your stuff is, you know, whether it be your phone or.
4:47 Speaker 03 Do you have to register that?
4:48 Speaker 02 No.
4:49 Speaker 03 Does it just automatically happen?
4:50 Speaker 02 Automatically does it.
4:50 Speaker 03 Yeah, right. Because I'm not doing it if you have to register it.
4:55 Speaker 02 No, automatically does it.
4:56 Speaker 03 Okay.
4:57 Speaker 02 So we had a high car. Beck and her parents were staying on. In L A, I was off to the airport. We had to check out early, so I dropped them at their new hotel.
5:07 Speaker 03 Yep.
5:07 Speaker 02 And I had a couple of hours to spare. So I looked up on Find My Devices and I'm like, hmm. I know where these, my AirPods are. They're in a suburb called Gardina, I think it's called. It's alongside Compton to.
5:23 Speaker 03 Sure.
5:23 Speaker 02 Give you perspective.
5:25 Speaker 03 Kids that grew up in the nineties, we only know from Boys in the Hood, the Ice Cube film. But we know it as a, you know, back in the nineties could be a dangerous place. Not sure what it's like now.
5:35 Speaker 02 Not a tourist destination.
5:37 Speaker 03 Yep.
5:37 Speaker 02 Traditionally.
5:37 Speaker 03 Could have been gentrified. I don't know.
5:39 Speaker 02 So I said, guys, I'll leave you to it. I'm going to go get to the airport early.
5:45 Speaker 03 Yep.
5:46 Speaker 02 And Beck said, are you going to go try and find your AirPods? And I said, yes, I am. She said, I think that's really dangerous. You shouldn't go.
5:54 Speaker 03 Were they in the high car? Oh, they've just, so someone's just picked them up, you think, and?
5:57 Speaker 02 Well, you don't know because all you see is the little. For the last three days, they've been driving around, they're being used, they're being recharged. They're sometimes out in this guy's ears or girl's ears, and then they're back in their case. And they seem to be going back to the same location each night.
6:11 Speaker 03 I mean, there's nothing, to be fair to this person that found your AirPods. What are you meant to do if you find a pair of AirPods?
6:19 Speaker 02 You can't return them.
6:19 Speaker 03 Get them back to the, it doesn't go, this is this person's email address. Like.
6:23 Speaker 02 No.
6:23 Speaker 03 You just enjoy them.
6:24 Speaker 02 Yeah. That's where I think, I think they've been stolen.
6:27 Speaker 03 What should this person do?
6:29 Speaker 02 Well, I think they hand them in. If I had left them at the airport, they should have handed them in.
6:33 Speaker 03 You probably, what if you left them on the seat of a cafe?
6:36 Speaker 02 Leave them at the cafe. So I can go back.
6:39 Speaker 03 I just think you go, look, chances of someone coming back are pretty low. I think that, okay.
6:43 Speaker 02 Anyway, so Bec's dad said, don't, please don't go to this place to get the AirPods. I said, it'll be fine, it'll be fine. He said, let's ask the, the bellhop who was just taking their bags out of the car. He said, would you ever go to Gardena? And he's like, why would you go there?
6:59 Speaker 03 To confront a thief.
7:03 Speaker 02 And I said, oh, my AirPods. He goes, mate, just leave them.
7:05 Speaker 03 Yeah.
7:06 Speaker 02 Oh, yeah, okay. I'll leave them. I was never gonna leave them. You know, you know this with me. It was just itching at me, like I can go and confront this person.
7:16 Speaker 03 But you also like to get to the airport early, so you must be between two worlds.
7:20 Speaker 02 I had plenty of time, Jack. I had plenty of time. So I go to the car, Bec chases me down and she says, you're, you're going, aren't you? I said, yeah, I'm gonna go, I'm gonna go and just see if I can find. She goes, I wanna come with you. So her dad's not happy with me for this. We're off on this adventure to find the AirPods.
7:37 Speaker 03 Cute.
7:38 Speaker 02 They.
7:38 Speaker 03 Cute, cute in the way that taking a human shield can be cute.
7:44 Speaker 02 So we drive out to Gardena.
7:47 Speaker 03 Yeah.
7:47 Speaker 02 It's a, it's like a 20 minutes from the airport. It's not too far.
7:50 Speaker 03 Nice. Anything. Quite like the efficiency. Even if we do get shot at, this has, at least it hasn't been too far out of our way.
7:59 Speaker 02 So we're going down and we're tracking them, you can, cause you can get it to like the nearest 10 metres.
8:03 Speaker 03 Yeah, great.
8:04 Speaker 02 And so we pull up in the street and there's a lot of people looking at us and there's a bit of, what are you up to? So we get out and this guy comes out and goes, what do you want? To me. And I said, I'm looking for my AirPods.
8:18 Speaker 03 Tough guy.
8:19 Speaker 02 They tracked to this kind of area. Like, I mean, have you seen, have you seen any AirPods? Said, no, I haven't seen any AirPods. I said, okay.
8:28 Speaker 03 See ya.
8:30 Speaker 03 Well, we tried.
8:32 Speaker 02 So then you can press a button.
8:35 Speaker 03 Oh, you can make them go di, di, di, ding.
8:36 Speaker 02 That makes them ding.
8:38 Speaker 03 Okay.
8:40 Speaker 02 So I'm like, okay, cool. And I press the button and we think we hear something, but it's not from his house.
8:48 Speaker 02 And I'm like, okay, thanks very much. And he said, man, I wouldn't be doing this. It's AirPods. Just get some more. This other neighbour.
8:57 Speaker 03 Yep.
8:58 Speaker 02 I said, yeah, yeah, yeah, they told that. That's registered. I've decided I'm gonna go down a different path. Across the road, there's a set of apartments, flats. This guy hurries out, backpack on, AirPods in his ears. And he starts walking and I look at the tracker.
9:15 Speaker 03 I mean, you are in California, the home of Apple.
9:17 Speaker 02 Yeah.
9:17 Speaker 03 There is gonna be more than one AirPods around.
9:20 Speaker 02 So.
9:21 Speaker 03 You look at the tracker, you think?
9:23 Speaker 02 The tracker, it, it, it looked like it was on the move.
9:25 Speaker 03 Moving at his pace.
9:26 Speaker 02 Yeah. So I, I ran up to him and said, hey, hey, hey, mate, mate.
9:30 Speaker 03 Citizen's arrest.
9:31 Speaker 02 He, he pauses and takes an AirPod out. I said, hey.
9:36 Speaker 03 That looks exactly like my AirPod.
9:39 Speaker 04 Where's Beck at this stage? In the car?
9:41 Speaker 02 She's loitering close to the car to be able to get back into it. Not thrilled that.
9:46 Speaker 03 Yep.
9:46 Speaker 02 I've tried to make a citizen's arrest. So I said, hey, mate, just wondering, just looking for my AirPods. Have you seen, have you had any AirPods in your ears in the last 10 seconds?
9:57 Speaker 03 Would you, would you, would you have one in your hand right now?
10:00 Speaker 02 He said, these are my AirPods.
10:01 Speaker 03 Yep.
10:02 Speaker 02 And then he took them out of his ears and he did have a lot of wax on them, but you could do that. It'd been three days.
10:06 Speaker 03 Yeah.
10:07 Speaker 02 You see, they're pretty old, da, da, da. And I said, oh, do you mind if I see the case? Because on my case, I have a printed out label that says Andy's AirPods.
10:16 Speaker 03 That's right. Didn't you do this to stop Beck taking your AirPods?
10:19 Speaker 02 Yes, but, and, but it's obviously got another opportunity.
10:23 Speaker 03 God, this is where, this is where Andy's just neat and practicalness meets. This could be life threatening for you.
10:31 Speaker 02 He pulls out the case. It's one of those custom coloured cases.
10:34 Speaker 03 Ah, it's like a rubber, like a silicon.
10:36 Speaker 02 And it's not, it's not mine.
10:38 Speaker 03 How do you know he's not hiding it in that case?
10:39 Speaker 02 No, no, it had like, it, it was.
10:41 Speaker 04 Well, they did like a colour run.
10:43 Speaker 02 Yeah, colour run on the case.
10:44 Speaker 03 Okay.
10:44 Speaker 02 And I went, I'm really sorry. And he said, that's all right, man. No problems. And he walks off. And we watch it and I'm sitting there going, could be in his backpack. No. He leaves, but it doesn't keep tracking. It's still right there.
10:59 Speaker 02 We're out in front of the house.
11:00 Speaker 03 Okay, so how many apartments are in this building? So this is where you're like, okay, now I just need to lay siege to these apartments for only two weeks. I mean, people must come out.
11:09 Speaker 02 Yeah, there's about 12. House next door, huge signs saying, dog will attack.
11:14 Speaker 03 Yep.
11:15 Speaker 02 Don't come on the trespass. So I was like, okay, we're not going in there back.
11:17 Speaker 03 Nothing compared to what Andy could do.
11:20 Speaker 02 I press the button again to play it.
11:22 Speaker 03 Mm hmm.
11:22 Speaker 02 And we hear the little sound.
11:24 Speaker 03 Geez.
11:25 Speaker 02 Just a little. And then this man on the third floor balcony.
11:30 Speaker 03 Peaks.
11:31 Speaker 02 Peaks.
11:33 Speaker 02 And then like a tortoise.
11:36 Speaker 03 Okay, that is a guilty peak.
11:38 Speaker 02 And I said, hey.
11:41 Speaker 02 And at this point, Beck's like, no, no, no, no, let's, let's, let's go. I was like, hey.
11:47 Speaker 02 And he comes back out.
11:48 Speaker 03 Yeah.
11:49 Speaker 02 I said, hey, how's the day going? He's like, good. I said, have you seen any AirPods? And he just shakes his head and walks back inside. I was like, hey, excuse, sorry, sorry.
12:00 Speaker 03 He keeps coming out.
12:01 Speaker 02 And he comes back out again.
12:02 Speaker 03 He does have the opportunity. He's a bad turtle because you've got your shell.
12:05 Speaker 02 Go in the shell.
12:05 Speaker 03 Don't keep coming, popping your head out of the shell.
12:08 Speaker 02 Yeah, but he's on the third floor of these apartments.
12:10 Speaker 03 So he feels pretty confident. That's when Andy pulls out his grappling.
12:17 Speaker 02 So I said, sorry, just, just can I grab a couple of moments? Like, it may have been by accident because at this stage, I'm like, there's no set, like he's obviously taken them. So it's gonna, how am I gonna convince him that it's okay to give them back?
12:31 Speaker 03 You probably took the meaning to give them back to the owner. Great news.
12:34 Speaker 02 Yeah, that kind of thing. I said, have you seen them? And he goes, no, no. And then walked back inside.
12:43 Speaker 03 Yep.
12:45 Speaker 02 I then see, which you can see on the device, the AirPods taken out of the case.
12:51 Speaker 03 He's having one last look.
12:54 Speaker 02 Like, go down with the pods.
12:55 Speaker 03 All right, listen, we're surrounded. I love you. I've never had sound like this. You ever been out of four AirPods? They usually just have wired $20 headphones. Let's do it. Let's play Queens of the Stone Age one last time. Full bore.
13:11 Speaker 02 And then he comes back out. And I go, hey, have you just taken the AirPods out of the case? He's like, no, I don't have the AirPods.
13:22 Speaker 03 Yep.
13:23 Speaker 02 I went, all right.
13:24 Speaker 03 He's got a pretty solid position here. I mean, he's got the opportunity to just keep denying.
13:30 Speaker 02 Yes. So I go, okay.
13:31 Speaker 03 I'm setting my girlfriend up. Is this the bit where you respect life? I bet you this young woman's life, you do have them.
13:39 Speaker 02 So I go to Beck, hey Beck, I'm just gonna go and up and knock on the door.
13:44 Speaker 03 Have a chat.
13:45 Speaker 02 Have a chat. She's like, please don't, please, please, please don't. Like, I feel, I don't feel comfortable.
13:50 Speaker 03 Yep.
13:50 Speaker 02 I said, you don't come up. You stay here. I'll see if I can just get the tortoise out of your shells. And she's like, please, please don't. And I look across at the original guy that I'd asked for the AirPods. And he's there with a rake in his front yard and his dad's now beside him.
14:08 Speaker 03 Doesn't sound like boys in the hood.
14:12 Speaker 02 And that guy just looks at me and shakes his head.
14:17 Speaker 03 Shakes his head.
14:18 Speaker 02 He just, and I thought at that point, hmm.
14:22 Speaker 03 Do you think he was shaking his head like, don't listen to Beck?
14:28 Speaker 02 No, I think it was, I wouldn't, I wouldn't head on up there.
14:32 Speaker 03 Yep. And your girlfriend literally saying to your face, please don't do this.
14:37 Speaker 02 Yes. So.
14:38 Speaker 03 But it was the man with the rake that finally made you turn around?
14:41 Speaker 02 Yeah, it was the man with the rake.
14:42 Speaker 03 Rake guy's not thinking about it. Maybe Beck's got a point.
14:45 Speaker 02 The rake guy knows this guy better than Beck does.
14:48 Speaker 03 Yeah.
14:48 Speaker 02 That's good intel. So we went back to the car and we left. And this is a few weeks ago now, but once a week at least. I look it up.
15:00 Speaker 03 You were there. Yeah, okay.
15:02 Speaker 02 And it's still in the same spot and they're charged. They went to Manhattan Beach the other day.
15:07 Speaker 03 They're having a good life.
15:09 Speaker 02 They are having a good life.
15:10 Speaker 03 AirPods are never meant to be yours forever. Mine certainly aren't.
15:14 Speaker 02 You get a year out of them.
15:15 Speaker 03 Mine, I've told you this, I've got a case in my bag that has no AirPods in it.
15:20 Speaker 02 Yes.
15:20 Speaker 03 But I still keep the case wondering, maybe I'll see him again one day. Cause I'm sure I'll find him in the pockets of a jacket or something like that.
15:26 Speaker 02 You realize you could do, or not anymore, they'd be under charge, but you could have done fine mine.
15:30 Speaker 03 Oh yeah, they've probably been through the wash a few times in an, in an, in an area that I don't know about. I mean, I know this is.
15:38 Speaker 02 This, this, I'm, I'm outing myself here for a giant must be nice. But when your AirPods connect to your phone, you know, you can name them or they just give themselves a name.
15:49 Speaker 03 Yeah.
15:49 Speaker 02 Mine are AirPods, Hamish's AirPods, number five.
15:53 Speaker 03 Yeah, Bianca's up to three.
15:56 Speaker 02 So, yeah, they're not, you never truly own an AirPod, Andy. You merely look after it for the next lucky person that finds them.
16:04 Speaker 03 I can come to terms with that.
16:05 Speaker 02 Yeah, he's having a good time.
16:11 Speaker 02 Because a mate of mine has just had a gut full of one of his coworkers.
16:15 Speaker 03 Yep.
16:16 Speaker 02 And I'm not doing that thing where, you know, a mate of mine, it's actually, I'm talking about me.
16:20 Speaker 03 It's Jack Post.
16:22 Speaker 02 Not Jack Post. We have a bloody great time in here.
16:26 Speaker 03 Yeah, and we're not workers.
16:27 Speaker 02 Yeah.
16:27 Speaker 03 So we can't be classified as hacker, you coworkers, that doesn't do any work.
16:31 Speaker 02 That's true, um, co-hobbyists, no, but even within the greater team.
16:35 Speaker 03 Yep.
16:36 Speaker 02 What a team.
16:37 Speaker 03 What a team.
16:37 Speaker 02 But I can imagine it is super annoying to work in one of those kind of nine to fives.
16:44 Speaker 03 And we've talked about this before, like, we know we live a completely charmed life because I have never, apart from like casual jobs we had at uni, but since the age of like 21, we've never not worked with our best friends.
16:59 Speaker 02 Yeah.
16:59 Speaker 03 Like, we've never had to turn up to a workplace where you're like, oh, great, Daryl's here. Yeah, I hate him, but I have to work with him.
17:04 Speaker 02 And it seems to be the gripe of my mates that do work in that environment, they do have a person that's just a P in the A.
17:11 Speaker 03 I mean, we had, we had a situation back on our team where one of our team members asked to have another one fired because he didn't like it.
17:20 Speaker 02 That's why, back in the day, yes, we have.
17:23 Speaker 03 There's enough more to go on, have we talked about that before?
17:25 Speaker 02 Yeah, but I.
17:26 Speaker 03 We don't need to bring names back into it, but we know who we're talking about.
17:29 Speaker 02 Yeah, yeah.
17:29 Speaker 03 So said, yeah, look, unfortunately I've tried to get on with him and I find him annoying, so. Uh, could you let him go?
17:36 Speaker 02 Hmm.
17:36 Speaker 03 And we had to say, well, he's actually not employed by us. He just works here at the station.
17:40 Speaker 02 And we don't find the same thing annoying.
17:43 Speaker 03 Yeah.
17:43 Speaker 02 But yeah, so that's the thing. So my mate, he had a guy that every time we caught up for a beer, he'd be complaining.
17:51 Speaker 03 Yep.
17:51 Speaker 02 About this guy Dave. Oh God, Dave did this, Dave did that, that's annoying, Dave never files up, et cetera, et cetera. Dave got fired.
17:58 Speaker 03 Oh, he'd be so happy.
17:59 Speaker 02 So I caught up with him and I said, hey mate, how are things? He goes, Dave got fired. I was like, oh, fantastic. And he goes, yeah, not really. I said, why? He goes, it's really put me on notice now that I'm not the worst. And I think I had a level of comfort being at work, knowing that if there was anyone going to be fired, it was going to be Dave.
18:20 Speaker 03 Yep. He was the heat shield.
18:22 Speaker 02 He goes, it was actually, I'm actually now more anxious at work because there's no dunks.
18:27 Speaker 03 Yep.
18:27 Speaker 02 In the office.
18:28 Speaker 03 If you were impalas in the wild.
18:31 Speaker 02 Yeah.
18:31 Speaker 03 And there was a notoriously slow and limpy impala. You'd always feel good because if you're like, next time the lions come, it's not me. Then when that guy got eaten, you'd be like, okay, now we gotta be on alert here.
18:43 Speaker 02 Yeah.
18:44 Speaker 03 Because we've lost Steve, limpy Steve.
18:46 Speaker 02 Hmm.
18:47 Speaker 03 Now it could be any of us.
18:48 Speaker 02 Could be any of us. And so I said to him, oh, do you, so do you think that you're performing worse? He goes, yeah, I think I'm performing worse with the anxiety that I, I'm not better than anyone in the business. I said, well, do you think the company should employ someone just to be the worst, to make other employees feel better about their performance? And he said, yeah, that'd be a good idea. And we wondered how that would work.
19:12 Speaker 02 Come in. How's it going? Is this the position for the worst employee in the office? Yes, you're an hour late. Great, and I intend to be most days. Right, will it be consistently an hour? Uh, well, sometimes 20 minutes, but sometimes up to four hours, you never know. Impressive start.
19:28 Speaker 03 Thank you.
19:28 Speaker 02 Will you tell people that you're going to be late?
19:31 Speaker 03 No.
19:32 Speaker 02 Will there be any explanation as to why you're late?
19:34 Speaker 03 I will usually just say it was a personal matter, which just means no one can ask questions and it makes them feel a bit awkward too.
19:41 Speaker 02 Very good. Now, the purpose of the job is to make others feel better about what they're doing.
19:45 Speaker 03 Yep.
19:45 Speaker 02 So that'll require you to have a sloppy appearance.
19:48 Speaker 03 Can do.
19:48 Speaker 02 To never meet deadlines.
19:49 Speaker 03 Absolutely not.
19:50 Speaker 02 To send passive aggressive emails.
19:52 Speaker 03 Yep.
19:52 Speaker 02 So are you gonna note any of this down?
19:54 Speaker 03 No, no, I don't do notes. I usually just do stuff verbally, so then later on, when someone goes, "You didn't tell me about that," I'll go, "Yeah, we talked about this," and it makes them feel silly, so you don't leave a paper trail.
20:04 Speaker 02 Yeah, great. Now, this is a tough one. The boss plays golf. What do you think that means to you?
20:10 Speaker 03 That works well for me. I also play golf, so I can lad it up with him when he's in town and he'll usually take my side on disputes.
20:17 Speaker 02 Yep.
20:17 Speaker 03 I might also actually, sorry, further to that, if I ever go to a golf tournament, I'll buy him some specific merch and I'll present it to him in front of the others, just to get a bit of favour.
20:26 Speaker 02 That's exactly the type of brown nosing we need in the job.
20:28 Speaker 03 No.
20:29 Speaker 02 Quickfire questions now.
20:30 Speaker 03 Yep.
20:30 Speaker 02 Do you need a desk?
20:31 Speaker 03 Definitely, yes.
20:32 Speaker 02 Will you use it?
20:33 Speaker 03 No.
20:34 Speaker 02 Will you talk loudly across the office?
20:35 Speaker 03 Absolutely.
20:36 Speaker 02 Will you put your hand up for extra work?
20:37 Speaker 03 Uh, yes.
20:39 Speaker 02 Ooh, will you do any of that work though?
20:40 Speaker 03 Never.
20:41 Speaker 02 Great. Are you open to feedback?
20:43 Speaker 03 Absolutely not.
20:43 Speaker 02 Will you shoot down ideas without offering solutions?
20:46 Speaker 03 Absolutely, yes.
20:47 Speaker 02 Great. Will you gossip?
20:48 Speaker 03 Oh, all the time.
20:49 Speaker 02 Create factions of conflict?
20:50 Speaker 03 Yeah, that's fun.
20:51 Speaker 02 Get hung up on small things that slows down any team progression?
20:54 Speaker 03 I'm very, very nitpicky.
20:56 Speaker 02 Great. Are parking spaces not allocated to you?
20:58 Speaker 03 Well, I sort of feel like all spaces are allocated to me in a way.
21:01 Speaker 02 And finally, never once clean your dirty dishes or offer to unpack the office dishwasher?
21:07 Speaker 03 No, never have, never will. You know the sign I saw out there, you go, "We don't have cleaning ferries in this office." I actually think there are cleaning ferries. Yeah, looking forward to meeting them.
21:15 Speaker 02 I think you're perfect for the role.
21:16 Speaker 03 I think I am.
21:17 Speaker 02 Do you wanna start at 9am tomorrow?
21:18 Speaker 03 Oh, absolutely not. I could be in tomorrow, it could be the next day, but it certainly won't be 9am on any day.
21:23 Speaker 02 Yeah.
21:23 Speaker 03 Thanks, mate. What was your name?
21:24 Speaker 02 Daryl.
21:25 Speaker 03 Don't care.
21:27 Speaker 02 He's gonna be great.
21:34 Speaker 03 And I want to take your memory back and Jack come along as well.
21:37 Speaker 06 Okay.
21:38 Speaker 03 Cause you were there.
21:40 Speaker 03 Way back when we started playing Tell Someone We Haven't Thought Of.
21:43 Speaker 06 Hmm.
21:44 Speaker 03 We had a dud hat.
21:47 Speaker 06 Yes, yes, I remember.
21:48 Speaker 03 A purple hat.
21:48 Speaker 06 Physio creme.
21:49 Speaker 03 Physio creme.
21:50 Speaker 06 Yeah.
21:50 Speaker 03 Uh, and it was terrible. No one wanted the physio creme hat and we, maybe we pushed it. We were like, this is the worst hat.
21:56 Speaker 06 It's the worst hat. I'd still to this day, the worst hat that I've ever come across.
21:59 Speaker 03 It would just have a really low F at hat.
22:02 Speaker 06 And it made us wonder whether they didn't care about the company or they put so much effort into the creme.
22:07 Speaker 03 Yep.
22:07 Speaker 06 That the hat was an afterthought, which would make better sense.
22:10 Speaker 03 Yeah. If you're a fan of physio creme and, um, it's, you know, used in sports and kind of, um, physiotherapy settings. They choose to shun all traditional spelling. Cause it's F I S I O.
22:22 Speaker 06 Yep.
22:23 Speaker 03 Instead of P H.
22:24 Speaker 06 Yeah.
22:24 Speaker 03 And then creme, C R E M. Instead of cream. So what is it? It's a cream for physios. How do we say it?
22:32 Speaker 06 Physio creme.
22:33 Speaker 03 So we would often refer to it as the world's number one creme. Um, and I think here's a few, I went back through the archives and here's a few examples.
22:41 Speaker 06 Physio creme, world's number one sports creme and world's number billion hat.
22:47 Speaker 03 That was a terrible hat.
22:48 Speaker 06 Yeah.
22:49 Speaker 03 The physio creme. Wonderful creme, terrible hat.
22:51 Speaker 06 What is physio creme, you ask? It's the world's number one pain relieving creme.
22:55 Speaker 03 Creme.
22:55 Speaker 06 They have produced what can only be described as the absolute bottom of the barrel. If the creme is on top, this is from the bottom of the barrel. This is the dregs.
23:03 Speaker 03 Sediment.
23:03 Speaker 06 Of the hat, of the hat world.
23:05 Speaker 03 Physio creme, the world's most famous creme.
23:07 Speaker 06 I do write it physio creme. Love it. Still, very bad hats.
23:10 Speaker 03 Physio creme. They are the world's number one creme, the world's number 5,000 hats.
23:15 Speaker 06 Great creme.
23:16 Speaker 03 Great creme. Name a better creme.
23:19 Speaker 06 Have you ever used?
23:21 Speaker 03 Physio creme. I've had it used on me by a physio. I can't say I've bought physio creme.
23:25 Speaker 06 I don't think I've used it.
23:26 Speaker 03 Again.
23:26 Speaker 06 My number one creme.
23:27 Speaker 03 In an episode with you, like just not sponsored.
23:30 Speaker 06 No.
23:30 Speaker 03 I mean, physio creme, I had it on good authority. I remember meeting someone that knew someone at head office going, what you've done for the creme is huge. Oh, really? I would have thought it was a negative thing. Cause when I, when I.
23:40 Speaker 06 But they're not selling hats, Jack.
23:42 Speaker 03 But when I'm in a physio and I see physio creme, all I can think is you do bad hats. Hmm. But that's not, that doesn't bother them. That's not what they're trying to do. Their mission statement. It's not a two pill admission statement. They only care, I think about muscle relief.
23:56 Speaker 06 Yep. Yep.
23:57 Speaker 03 Here's the crazy thing I realized the other day. We spent years, and I've always said, I've stood by our assertion that it's the world's number one creme. Cause I didn't know of any other creams. I couldn't think of another creme. Jack, I'm very annoyed at me for this. I'm only a little bit angry at Jack for this and he'll give you a pass. Pseudo creme.
24:23 Speaker 03 It's not pseudo cream. You know the thing you put on babies for nappy rash?
24:26 Speaker 02 Yes.
24:27 Speaker 03 It's not pseudo cream. It's pseudo creme. It was like for anyone that's changed nappies, like when babies get nappy rash.
24:34 Speaker 02 It's like a pseudo creme.
24:35 Speaker 03 You wouldn't have done some, you wouldn't have done some pseudo creme on the bums. I mean, what do you spend in nappy world? Two years, year and a half.
24:42 Speaker 02 We were definitely calling it pseudo cream though.
24:44 Speaker 03 Always pseudo cream.
24:45 Speaker 02 Yeah, cream.
24:45 Speaker 03 Always pseudo cream. We had, I was looking for a bit of pseudo cream the other night because it's like, we had something behind our knees, like an itchy thing. I was like, put some pseudo cream on it. I'm sure we still have a tub or something like rattling around the bathroom drawers. I get it out, like, well, I'll be damned. It's actually creme. It's pseudo creme. I was like, all these years of thinking there was only one creme commercially available to us as Australian consumers. And physio creme, just this complete free run of, they would have known.
25:15 Speaker 02 Yeah.
25:15 Speaker 03 This huge free run of just being known as the world's number one creme. So then I'm like, hang on a sec. What have we done? What have we done? We've been, we didn't look into this.
25:24 Speaker 02 And you would have used studio.
25:25 Speaker 03 Using pseudo creme.
25:26 Speaker 02 Pseudo creme.
25:27 Speaker 03 Yeah. Five, six times a day when you're in the nappy world.
25:30 Speaker 02 And you've had physio creme on you once.
25:32 Speaker 03 Once and I didn't buy it.
25:33 Speaker 02 Applied by someone else.
25:34 Speaker 03 Bought so much, it's like a Maltesers, Maltesers situation. We've just always thought it was cream. Anyway, so I go, how bad is the damage we've done here? Yes, it is, there is another creme and I didn't know about this creme. Maybe the other things we've said stack up. Maybe physio creme still could be the number one creme.
25:55 Speaker 02 Yeah.
25:56 Speaker 03 You know, so do a bit of a deep dive. Now, first of all, I'm like, what other creams have we missed? Good news is, according to my research, a little bit of chat on thinking mode. So not, don't just give me a quick answer.
26:08 Speaker 02 Yeah, yeah.
26:09 Speaker 03 Twenty six seconds of thinking, can't find any other creams.
26:13 Speaker 02 Outside of world, worldwide.
26:15 Speaker 03 Worldwide in the pharmacy.
26:16 Speaker 02 Oh, so it's two creme, right?
26:17 Speaker 03 There's two creams. Physio creme, pseudo creme. One relieves pain, one relieves itching.
26:22 Speaker 02 Yep.
26:23 Speaker 03 Okay, I don't go into the details to chat and I go, listen, I've made a big error, but don't make me feel better. I've been telling people that Physio Cremes and more than I said, look, between the two of them, who's selling more units?
26:36 Speaker 02 Great.
26:37 Speaker 03 Thinking, thinking, thinking, does about forty seconds of thinking. They're owned by various conglomerates.
26:42 Speaker 02 Yes.
26:44 Speaker 03 But it's like, look, even conservatively, Physio Cremes are kind of localized to Australia.
26:51 Speaker 02 Yeah.
26:51 Speaker 03 Pseudo Crem is global.
26:53 Speaker 02 And it's on babies every day.
26:55 Speaker 03 By a factor of almost twenty to one.
26:57 Speaker 02 Yeah.
26:58 Speaker 03 I'm sorry, sorry.
26:59 Speaker 02 Yeah, I believe it.
27:00 Speaker 03 Have got it wrong.
27:01 Speaker 02 Yeah.
27:02 Speaker 03 Pseudo Crem, though this whole time was by far the world's number one Crem.
27:08 Speaker 02 Yep. So we stubborn and we're gonna keep, because you know, we're living in a world now where you can just say something enough and people believe it, or are we gonna be mad enough?
27:16 Speaker 03 I think you gotta own up. I think you gotta, except I think you gotta cut your mistakes. And I think it would be after all the free advertising for the last ten years that, that Physio Cremes got as the world's number one Crem.
27:29 Speaker 02 Now, number two.
27:29 Speaker 03 They should do a pamphlet in this. They don't have to change their packaging, but they should do a little, they should do the retraction to be like, look, because they would know.
27:38 Speaker 02 Yeah.
27:38 Speaker 03 If you're in a category of two creams and you hear these guys calling you the number one Crem and you know for a fact you're not the number one Crem, they would have known we're getting illegally branded.
27:47 Speaker 02 It's not on them.
27:48 Speaker 03 But let's make it on them. I think they should do a retraction and go, like a, not a product recall, but a slip just to go in the tubes.
27:55 Speaker 02 Saying that, but I don't think it's upon them because then anyone can say anything about a company and it's on the company to do their retraction in a pamphlet within their box.
28:05 Speaker 03 All right. Well, I'll, I'll give them the opportunity to go, you knew full well what was going on. You chose to be crowned the world's number one Crem. They never reached out to us to correct it.
28:13 Speaker 02 We now know, Physio Crem, do, does any spokesperson there wanna come forward, please contact the show and, and make a statement. We'd love to read it out.
28:21 Speaker 03 Why didn't you pull us up on it? You damn well you weren't the number one. Damn, damn well.
28:27 Speaker 02 They might have thought you were going for a subjective number one. Like, to me, it's the world's number one Crem.
28:32 Speaker 03 Inquire. Send me an email. Check.
28:42 Speaker 03 Ando, we get so many upset Andys coming in, but occasionally, yeah, I know you do. So I know only see half, so I do say.
28:50 Speaker 02 Apologies to those people.
28:51 Speaker 03 Send them twice would be my, send them three times and you're a chance to land on my side of the fence.
28:56 Speaker 02 What we should point out though, is there is a catch system. Carly does review emails from both sides.
29:02 Speaker 03 She does. She's the only person who gets to see both patterns.
29:04 Speaker 02 She's like the council.
29:05 Speaker 03 Yep.
29:05 Speaker 02 You and I are neighbours and we tend to toss things either side of the fence, but she comes past and really neighbourhood watch. Make sure that nothing's been missed.
29:13 Speaker 03 Just send them three times anyway. We get some international ones from time to time and I like to collate them because of the time difference though.
29:20 Speaker 02 Very hard to get on.
29:21 Speaker 03 I like to go, okay, reach back out to people and go, give us your upset Andy. If you live not in the time zone we're recording this in Australia, would love it as a voice memo.
29:30 Speaker 02 Oh.
29:30 Speaker 03 We have an international edition of upset Andy.
29:46 Speaker 03 Now we talked about doing an international version opener, but that would please you.
29:49 Speaker 02 Yeah, that wouldn't be.
29:50 Speaker 03 So to upset you, we do the normal opener, even though it doesn't fit the segment.
29:54 Speaker 02 Yeah, that's fair.
29:56 Speaker 03 Got you.
29:57 Speaker 02 I mean, I had, there was a please Andy from me the other day when we're doing your TV show.
30:01 Speaker 03 Yep.
30:01 Speaker 02 Where it involved me having a sponge with paint in it.
30:04 Speaker 03 Yep.
30:05 Speaker 02 And I yelled out my system to you both.
30:08 Speaker 03 Yes.
30:08 Speaker 02 About how I had different colours in different corners to blend and I could flip the sponge around and stuff. And I could see both of you.
30:15 Speaker 03 You just lost these.
30:16 Speaker 02 Lost attention fading away rapidly.
30:18 Speaker 03 I don't remember.
30:19 Speaker 02 Both at the time went, great mate.
30:22 Speaker 03 Yep.
30:22 Speaker 02 Thanks heaps with a thumbs up. And that was a morale boost at the time, but I realised that you guys didn't care.
30:27 Speaker 03 No, then I turned around, I was like, great, cool. I've wasted time listening to that. So now I'm have to go even faster and listen to what I'm doing. No time to think. Um, Jack, you mentioned you've got one and I'll allow it because you have Dutch heritage.
30:39 Speaker 04 Thank you. Or I could be representing Australia.
30:42 Speaker 03 This is Jack from the Netherlands, Andy.
30:45 Speaker 04 Hello, Andy.
30:45 Speaker 02 Hello.
30:46 Speaker 04 Does this upset you?
30:47 Speaker 02 Hmm.
30:47 Speaker 04 I bought a cheaper alternative for my electric toothbrush heads online. And when they came. They didn't fit on the toothbrush properly.
30:58 Speaker 03 Awesome. But I bet if you squashed them.
30:59 Speaker 04 If you squish them, they still vibrate and you get maybe thirty or forty seconds before they vibrate off. And I'm through my, and I'm on now my second toothbrush head of twelve.
31:10 Speaker 02 No, no, that is a huge upset. Yeah.
31:14 Speaker 03 You get twelve in a pack.
31:15 Speaker 04 You got twelve in a pack. Yeah. For roughly the same price as the two pack of the branded version.
31:20 Speaker 03 I, I have an electric toothbrush too, and you, Zoe buys the refill every now and again. That, cause I know when I'm onto the last head, I'll then have to remember to buy the other pack, which I see never happening. I like more like the idea of having one spare in the bathroom. I will run that first one till it's like one bristle left. Like a guy with a one hair comb over, just rattling around in my mouth, just so I don't have to change it.
31:45 Speaker 02 How do you guys go about shopping lists?
31:48 Speaker 03 I don't do one. Sometimes Zoe will send me a shopping list and I, cause she doesn't do it in the order you walk through the aisles. I'm bouncing around all over the shopping centre or the supermarket. It's just known in our house that one to four items, ten percent won't be got. But I'll get thirty percent bonus things that you were never expecting me to get.
32:08 Speaker 04 I'm in charge of refills. So anything that is refilled, toothbrush heads, bin bags, et cetera, sponges, that's my job.
32:16 Speaker 02 And how do you go about remembering it?
32:17 Speaker 04 I'm actually pretty good, except for times where I try to buy the cheaper alternative and it doesn't.
32:22 Speaker 02 Yeah. How does Bianca feel about the?
32:24 Speaker 04 She hates the toothbrush because she's on the same toothbrush heads and she's hating squishing it on. Where for me, it's very easy.
32:29 Speaker 03 What about a blue tack?
32:30 Speaker 04 Nah, I wouldn't be strong enough.
32:31 Speaker 03 Liquid nails?
32:32 Speaker 04 International one. Yeah, that could work, but then hard to get off.
32:35 Speaker 03 That's a down the track problem, though.
32:39 Speaker 03 All right, here we go. International upset Andy's. First, this is Jesse from the UK.
32:45 Speaker 07 Ahoy to the big three. It's Jesse calling from the UK. I'm currently sitting in my car, which has broken down. So I thought I would use this time fruitfully to tell you about an annoying Andy.
32:57 Speaker 02 That annoys me.
32:57 Speaker 07 I have three bank cards, each with a unique PIN, but I can never remember which PIN goes with which card. But this presents no problem to me because each card allows you three attempts when you enter your PIN. And so inevitably, one of the three I put in is going to work with every single card. So happy days.
33:18 Speaker 03 No need to change this, is it? And what a little bit of excitement to build into your day to go, oh, it's gonna be a good day. I got it on the first try. It seems like you've hit a little jackpot.
33:28 Speaker 04 I run the same, essentially the same thing with passwords. I've got three different passwords that rotate and I never know which ones is which account. But you're eventually gonna get it.
33:37 Speaker 02 Oh gosh, no, I don't like that. I'd be straight on the, the appropriate app corresponding to my bank to make sure that I knew what PIN it was.
33:45 Speaker 03 No one's got the time. This is Grace from Sweden, could be Aussie, could be Swedish.
33:51 Speaker 00 Hey, hey, Miss and Andy, it's Grace here, Australian, living in Sweden. I've an upset Andy for you. Uh, so my boyfriend hates it when the towels on the back of the door in the bathroom or in the kitchen fall off the hook. So he has cut a hole in every single towel that we own, including all the tea towels. So we don't have that problem anymore.
34:13 Speaker 03 No dramas.
34:14 Speaker 02 Don't hate it.
34:15 Speaker 03 Except I know full well you do hate it because he's cut it rough for sure.
34:20 Speaker 02 He's cut it rough.
34:20 Speaker 03 You would hem it.
34:21 Speaker 02 I would, I would hem it.
34:22 Speaker 04 And even if you cut it smooth, it's gonna fray.
34:25 Speaker 02 No, no.
34:25 Speaker 03 Not the way I cut.
34:27 Speaker 02 If you could, you could do a punch.
34:29 Speaker 03 Yep.
34:29 Speaker 02 Material punch and then a hem.
34:31 Speaker 03 Is that a special tool, a material punch?
34:33 Speaker 02 Yeah, you got, you got material punch.
34:35 Speaker 03 Like a hole punch.
34:36 Speaker 04 Like a hole punch.
34:36 Speaker 02 Yeah, like a hole punch, but you get, there's, there's ones for material, there's one for belts. Have you seen those ones that you, you, you?
34:40 Speaker 03 I just use a drill.
34:44 Speaker 03 So much faster. I've used that, the, I've tried to use a belt hole thing before and it's like, it hurts your hand and you're getting sweaty and it's getting frustrating.
34:52 Speaker 02 Most of you're blunt one.
34:53 Speaker 03 Get a, get a drill, you're not gonna regret it.
34:56 Speaker 02 Okay.
34:57 Speaker 03 And I don't wanna put belt hole punch people out of business. We had a similar thing the other day with Rue's, her little school jumper, bit tied around the cuffs.
35:04 Speaker 02 Yeah.
35:05 Speaker 03 And I was like, oh, you know, cause you do have that, you know, lot of hands, is that a hem cuff? I suppose, like that line of sewing around the head, around the wrist. And she's like, I don't like it. It's too tight. And I'm like, you gotta wear your jumper. I said, listen, come here. We have good scissors. The one, you know, the ones that can cut a chicken bone?
35:21 Speaker 02 Yeah.
35:22 Speaker 03 And so I get them out of the knife block. Let's go look. No one's gonna know about this. Just snip, snip, snip. Just cut that hem a little bit.
35:29 Speaker 02 Yeah.
35:29 Speaker 03 Just to let out the tension. A little bit.
35:32 Speaker 02 That didn't quite work.
35:34 Speaker 03 But same principle. I mean, it eased it off a bit, but then I was like, what have you done to the jumper?
35:39 Speaker 02 Yeah.
35:40 Speaker 03 It's been a dark on dark. You can barely tell. I think for player comfort, you can allow that.
35:45 Speaker 02 Yeah. Well, again, going back to my dad, he would do that, but then properly hem it.
35:50 Speaker 03 No time.
35:51 Speaker 02 Okay, next one.
35:52 Speaker 03 Jason, Jason from the U S.
35:55 Speaker 04 Jason from New York here. I've just turned forty, which means I'm at a phase of my life where I've got to take all sorts of vitamins and supplements and stuff. And it's a lot. It's a handful of pills. It's four different powders in four different glasses of water. And there's all these rules about like, when you're supposed to take them. You're supposed to stagger them out across the day and eat before them or something. I don't know. I wasn't really listening. I'm a busy man, moving too fast. So what I do every morning in the office kitchen is I just mix them all together and chug it down all at once. It's just a lot faster and more convenient. Unfortunately, it does give me mild but immediate diarrhea every single time. But that's okay.
36:39 Speaker 04 Off to the office bathroom, a quick squirt, and then I can get on with my day.
36:44 Speaker 03 Cost of doing business.
36:45 Speaker 02 Wow.
36:46 Speaker 04 What does he mean? I'm well over forty and I'm not taking anything.
36:49 Speaker 03 Well, I guess he's doctors. You know, this is doctor's orders.
36:52 Speaker 02 Yeah.
36:52 Speaker 03 He's, he's, he's going for longevity here, but I do like that.
36:55 Speaker 02 I don't think the order is we need you to do a small amount of diarrhea every morning.
36:59 Speaker 03 I've fallen for the same trap. Like you get fed this thing to be like, hey, listen, if you wanna, you know, live a long time, starts now in your forties.
37:05 Speaker 02 Absolutely the kind of guy that would have all these supplements.
37:08 Speaker 03 But then you buy, so you go, yes, I will do this.
37:11 Speaker 02 Hmm.
37:11 Speaker 03 And you buy a three month supply. And then on the third morning, you're like, wait a second, every day for the rest of my life?
37:18 Speaker 03 I'm gonna spend my whole life taking this powder. I can't do this. I think I'm not doing this anymore. And then three months later, the next one arrives, because you realize you subscribe to save thirty seconds. I've got, now I've got six months minus three days worth. And I'll just put that in the very, very top shelf. Think about that when we move.
37:36 Speaker 02 Um, last one.
37:37 Speaker 03 Last one, Josie from the UK.
37:40 Speaker 07 Ahoy, boys. Josie here, an Aussie living in the UK. My upset Andy happened at my second job. Yes, very in touch, I know. Working at a pub. So one of my coworkers was asked to cut the lemons and limes into wedges. Obviously to garnish the drinks. But I don't think he understood or knew what wedges were because as I went to grab one from the tub during rush hour, I noticed they were literally all cut in just randomly shaped large and small chunks, like picture. Two thirds of a lemon cut into a rectangle.
38:21 Speaker 07 Um, I'm usually fast and loose, but I had a hard time convincing most customers that this was an acceptable addition to their drink. Um, love the pod. It's a nice taste of home to listen to, but what would be even better is an old mate's pub in London. I would definitely have loved to work there and cut lemons and limes evenly.
38:43 Speaker 03 Your mate won't get employed. Um, thanks, Josie. What a legend.
38:46 Speaker 02 She attached a picture.
38:47 Speaker 03 That does bother me. That does bother me.
38:50 Speaker 02 It looks like, that looks like the way you would cut it if you were using the communal juicer at a, at an airport lounge.
38:57 Speaker 03 I don't even, I actually feel like cutting it that different makes, requires effort. I was like, that someone's, it's, it's, it reminded me of like, it's the variety of pieces you get in Tetris. You go, okay, well, it's always four squares, but how many combinations? Unique shape. How many combinations you give it four squares? Like it's always the maximum amount of shape variations you could make out of a lemon.
39:18 Speaker 02 It is a budget holiday puzzle that your dad would give to you and say recreate the lemon.
39:24 Speaker 03 If COVID had gone on for another year, that would have been like, oh guys, we're playing lemon quest again. Now make it back up into a lemon.
39:37 Speaker 03 Look, I know I said we're going to leave this lie for a bit, but there's been some developments in Hame's Hives, in the bee world, beekeeping world, largely.
39:48 Speaker 02 So has any developments in Hame's Hive?
39:50 Speaker 03 Yes.
39:51 Speaker 02 Or just a development in the beekeeping world?
39:54 Speaker 03 Both.
39:55 Speaker 02 That you're going to tell us about and you're going to say it affects Hame's Hives even though you've done nothing?
39:59 Speaker 03 Bit of both.
40:00 Speaker 02 Okay.
40:00 Speaker 03 Okay. Have a huge announcement. Remind me not to let this episode finish without telling you about the huge announcement.
40:06 Speaker 02 Okay.
40:08 Speaker 02 Great fun.
40:11 Speaker 03 Huge announcement will be at the end of this update.
40:14 Speaker 02 Yep.
40:14 Speaker 03 Um.
40:14 Speaker 02 Great.
40:16 Speaker 03 Celebrity beekeeping seems to be booming. I think we mentioned last time that-
40:20 Speaker 02 Did you mention this last time?
40:21 Speaker 03 Yeah, Ryan Maloney.
40:22 Speaker 02 Yeah.
40:22 Speaker 03 Tony. Barnsy? Did I tell you about Barnsy? Guess who else is in? Buddy Franklin.
40:28 Speaker 02 Really?
40:28 Speaker 03 Buddy's in.
40:29 Speaker 02 That was in the last update as well.
40:30 Speaker 03 No, I don't think Buddy's fresh. And guess who else is in?
40:33 Speaker 02 I'm pretty sure Buddy was in the last update.
40:35 Speaker 03 Nicole Richie. Nicole Richie just joined the beekeeping world.
40:39 Speaker 02 Yeah, okay.
40:40 Speaker 03 That's a new one.
40:41 Speaker 02 So so far, one bit of information is new.
40:44 Speaker 03 Just saying, Nicole Richie, nice to have someone who's not bee, like, like, I think, like, you know, Hame's Hives, Blake's bees, Barnsy's bees, like, anyone with a bee in their name, it just seems very tempting. Nicole Richie, you believe her because it's not an immediate brand. It's not immediately catchy.
40:59 Speaker 02 Yep. Are they all selling honey or some of them are just keeping bees privately?
41:03 Speaker 03 No, these are all, these are all commercial operations, I believe. There's two big announcements for Hame's Hives.
41:10 Speaker 02 Plus, plus the huge announcement?
41:12 Speaker 03 Oh, sorry. One of them's, I'm obviously categorizing a huge announcement as it's big.
41:16 Speaker 02 Okay.
41:18 Speaker 03 Do you want the biggest?
41:22 Speaker 03 The biggest announcement or do you want the second biggest?
41:25 Speaker 02 Have we, have we heard 75% of it before? And one of your previous announcements, like just this new one we just had or?
41:31 Speaker 03 No.
41:31 Speaker 02 Okay.
41:31 Speaker 03 Build up to it.
41:32 Speaker 02 Give us this, give us the not as big one and finish with the huge. Give us the big and we'll finish with the huge.
41:38 Speaker 03 Okay, got a legitimate email that came to my side of the fence. I can only imagine how many have been coming to your side of the fence that have not passed on.
41:47 Speaker 02 I would pass them on, but there's a very small flow.
41:50 Speaker 03 Well, I just know someone.
41:51 Speaker 02 The same amount of honey that you're creating, that's about the flow speed.
41:54 Speaker 03 I actually had a suggestion from someone, which I don't mind for when we do later on in the year, the price is correct. Someone said, would it be possible to do a V I P, V I B section for people that are subscribed to Hames Hive? So maybe I could have five seats that I could.
42:11 Speaker 02 No, no, remember mixing streams. We've talked about this. Don't mix the stream.
42:14 Speaker 03 What if I paid as a sponsor?
42:17 Speaker 02 Yeah, maybe.
42:17 Speaker 03 Yeah, he can.
42:18 Speaker 02 Yeah, Andy immediately has got a million dollars.
42:22 Speaker 02 Well, we need us.
42:23 Speaker 03 You do need some sponsorship. So we'll see if Hames Hive could afford to sponsor one or two seats in the audience and then give that to a Hive member.
42:30 Speaker 02 Okay.
42:31 Speaker 03 Okay, I'm sensing some reluctance there, but that's nothing new on the beekeeping front. Got a contact by someone who said, please don't use my name.
42:39 Speaker 02 Okay.
42:40 Speaker 03 But I am a category manager slash purchasing manager, Australia wide for Woolworths, watching Hames Hives closely.
42:50 Speaker 03 Sorry, Coles.
42:51 Speaker 02 Cole. So you don't even see. So it's from Coles or Woolworths?
42:57 Speaker 03 It's from Coles.
43:00 Speaker 03 Doesn't matter. Well, I'm not using their name. So you can only imagine that as soon as Cole, either or, as soon as someone else hears this, I'll be like.
43:06 Speaker 02 Of course, they, it's all they're using you, you and this show is an opportunity to get a mention on the show.
43:13 Speaker 03 Well, we're backfired because I mentioned the competitor.
43:17 Speaker 03 And that's just, you want to do business with us?
43:19 Speaker 02 Yeah.
43:20 Speaker 03 That's how we roll.
43:21 Speaker 02 Yeah, okay, cool.
43:21 Speaker 03 Uh, once the honey starts flowing, just interesting to know that already shelf space is being made for the honey.
43:28 Speaker 02 Well, what have they said?
43:30 Speaker 03 She said, we're watching very closely.
43:33 Speaker 02 Is that one of the big announcements?
43:34 Speaker 03 That is a big announcement. Jack, that's a potential Australia wide deal.
43:37 Speaker 02 Yeah, but it hasn't promised anything.
43:39 Speaker 03 Yeah. How can you, well, I think watching closely is a great first step.
43:43 Speaker 02 Yeah. I mean, do you know how much output you have to do to service like a supermarket? Like obviously with Timmy's and Jenny's, the amount of decisions we have to make.
43:54 Speaker 03 You are not in the mood for the biggest announcement.
43:59 Speaker 03 You know what, I'm not even going to tell you the biggest announcement because you've just, you're not in the mood.
44:05 Speaker 02 Give us a clue.
44:06 Speaker 03 You're not in the mood.
44:06 Speaker 02 I'm sorry, can we have it?
44:08 Speaker 03 No, it's marketing based and you don't care and we're ending the show. I will tell the Hames Hives community who we have on a mailing list in their own time.
44:15 Speaker 02 Yep.
44:16 Speaker 03 And you will be left out of this exciting announcement, but.
44:20 Speaker 02 Come on, what do we need to do to try and get it out of you? What do you need?
44:22 Speaker 03 We're out of time, we're out of time for the episode.
44:24 Speaker 02 We've been the time.
44:27 Speaker 03 Ding ding ding ding.
44:28 Speaker 02 You don't have a huge announcement.
44:29 Speaker 03 I do have a huge announcement, I can't really say it.
44:31 Speaker 02 He doesn't have one, Jack.
44:32 Speaker 03 I probably is better, I don't want to give the competitors, my competitors a jump on this.
44:37 Speaker 02 Nicole Ritchie. Go Buddy Franklin.
44:39 Speaker 03 I don't want Buddy, I don't want Barnsy knowing about this because I'm going to catch him flat footed, but we'll come back to this app. You'll see the thing when we launch the honey.
44:47 Speaker 02 So easy to retrofit though.
44:48 Speaker 03 You'll see the thing we've launched the honey and you go, that's pretty brilliant, Hamish, is that the thing you were talking about back in July?
44:53 Speaker 02 Give us the initials.
44:55 Speaker 03 Yep.
44:55 Speaker 02 Of what you're talking about now.
45:00 Speaker 02 You can't have a think of an idea and then go, that's what I was talking about. Cause I'm not convinced you have an idea.
45:06 Speaker 03 This isn't, I can't actually think of a better two words for this, but it is BS. It's not BS, but it is.
45:13 Speaker 02 BS.
45:14 Speaker 03 The first word is B, the second word is S. We'll come back to and you'll go, brilliant, was that what you were talking about?
45:21 Speaker 02 I'm sorry, we've got you in the wrong mood.
45:23 Speaker 03 Well, it's not, I'm always excited about the honey. I'm just sad to see that you guys continue to resist this potentially million dollar idea.
45:32 Speaker 02 They gotta get me one of those bells.
Previous 339 - The 100 Pizza Challenge Next 341 - Pizza for the People: Jury Selection Page updated October 29, 2026 · transcript and summary are machine-generated