Pod Insights Hamish & Andy 2025 Ep 301 - Andy’s apology song to Jack About this episode Plans (and CAD’s) are well and truly underway for the Tallest Hat record attempt, but a concerning health risk has been flagged…
Andy issues an apology song to Jack for reading out his humiliating golf scores, but how sorry is he really? More solid power moves have been sent in, and Hamish is humbled by a member of his ‘family’!
1. Tallest hat - a small health risk
2. Andy’s apology song to Jack
3. Power moves
4. In the Hertz family
Transcript 0:02 Speaker 00 A Listener Production.
0:07 Speaker 01 Activate your internet, because the Hay Mission Andy Podcast starts in three, two...
0:17 Speaker 01 Sorry, it's still buffering. One.
0:23 Speaker 02 Ahoy to my duodenum, ham. Yeah, this is a body part. Where's the duodenum again? I want to say the penis.
0:33 Speaker 02 Which is the Latin for the penis. Oh, no, no, it's not. See, that's the thing. If it was there, it'd be like, yep, great. But since it's not, then you become the guy that, um... Is sure the duodenum's not in the penis? Lys is not gonna do three things about the penis? Why wouldn't she, Jack? Why wouldn't she? It's part of the body. Yep. I would just be shocked if she chose that. I think you're thinking of the perineum. No, I know that's in the penis. If Jack's is banjo string, I would be like, come on, mate.
1:04 Speaker 02 Oh, no. No. Duodenum. Oh, you've just changed it at the moment. I bet it was.
1:16 Speaker 02 Ahoy to my duodenum, Jack.
1:19 Speaker 03 Ahoy. And I am the ileum.
1:23 Speaker 02 Foot. Inside or outside the body?
1:25 Speaker 03 Inside, inside the body.
1:28 Speaker 02 Is it not a bone?
1:29 Speaker 03 And it doesn't connect.
1:31 Speaker 02 Is it something tonsilly?
1:32 Speaker 03 No.
1:33 Speaker 02 Doesn't connect?
1:36 Speaker 03 Oh, it does. I suppose it actually does eventually.
1:39 Speaker 02 Get to the penis. Better be a whole new leg bones connected to the song.
1:44 Speaker 03 But I don't think so. Super important. We have two of them.
1:50 Speaker 02 Lungs.
1:51 Speaker 03 Not lungs.
1:52 Speaker 02 Testicles.
1:53 Speaker 03 No.
1:54 Speaker 02 Get out of there.
1:55 Speaker 03 But they're not identical.
1:57 Speaker 02 For the regular listeners, I am nowhere near Jack's testicles. Just in case that sounded like I was doing a live inspection trying to find his duodenum.
2:08 Speaker 02 Get out of there, man.
2:10 Speaker 03 You'd have to go higher.
2:12 Speaker 02 Yeah.
2:12 Speaker 03 You're probably a foot higher. And there's two of them.
2:17 Speaker 02 Kidneys.
2:18 Speaker 03 Of this, but they're not identical.
2:21 Speaker 04 Small intestine, big intestine.
2:23 Speaker 03 He's got the small, it's the small intestine, Jack. Yes, you're right.
2:27 Speaker 02 He's one of them.
2:28 Speaker 03 There are three sections of the small intestine we are talking about. The duodenum is the first and shortest section. The jejunum is the middle section responsible for carrying food, waits towards the ileum, using a wave-like muscle contractions, that's you, Jacko, and the final and longest section where the most nutrients are absorbed in the large intestine is ileum.
2:49 Speaker 02 So I wasn't miles off. Tubular organ that is capable of muscle contractions.
2:55 Speaker 03 Okay.
2:59 Speaker 03 But yes, no points though.
3:01 Speaker 02 Because I don't know if it happens in medical school where the professor comes in and goes, today we're doing tubular organs. We just spin the wheel, spin the wheel to see which one we do. Intestine or the penis.
3:14 Speaker 04 Yeah. But you learn the intestine, you pretty much know the penis. And vice versa.
3:19 Speaker 02 It's a bit fuller, it's a bit fuller.
3:22 Speaker 03 Ahoy also to Tom, who wouldn't have thought that he was coming straight off the back of this discussion, but when he went to hamishnetty.com and uploaded what he's been up to.
3:32 Speaker 05 Hoi, boys, and much gusto to you all. I'm coming on here to defend Andy's bow. He's been covering a lot of flat for it lately and I thought we needed some positive press re the bow. We spotted Andy down at Drummond Forshaw. Andy was mid-run, looking like he'd smoked about 20 packs of cigarettes. I stopped him for a bow. Instead, Andy, mid-run, decided to bow, which is probably more impressive than a stationary bow, if I may add. And then to his credit, he obviously looped his run back, straight past our mob again, and we've asked for another bow and he is obliged, very deep for a mid-run bow. I give it a nine out of 10 and I think that Hamish and Jack have some serious competition in the bow department.
4:17 Speaker 05 Good on you, boys.
4:18 Speaker 04 Wonderful. So a moving, a moving bow.
4:20 Speaker 03 Well, I mean, first of all, we just come up talking about. Talking about body parts and he said, I want to give kudos to Andy's bow. And I'd heard it as a bow.
4:29 Speaker 04 I thought he said bow.
4:31 Speaker 03 I'm like, oh no.
4:32 Speaker 02 What are the chances of this? That connects straight to the duodenum.
4:36 Speaker 03 Um, well, yeah, when you, when you run.
4:40 Speaker 04 But he didn't stop striding.
4:41 Speaker 03 No.
4:42 Speaker 04 That's impressive.
4:43 Speaker 03 Yes, kind of.
4:43 Speaker 02 That's like a very, very fast emu bob.
4:46 Speaker 03 Yeah, that's, that's what it would have looked like.
4:48 Speaker 02 Ostrich bob at full speed.
4:50 Speaker 03 Thank you, Tom. Appreciate that. People who don't know.
4:55 Speaker 02 Wow.
4:55 Speaker 03 Do you know these before?
4:56 Speaker 02 Andy selected just a compliment to come in. Oh my God. Thank you, Tom. Um, what a realistic sounding AI. That was awesome. Thanks, mate.
5:05 Speaker 04 He's a selective. Now, now if people want to know, the quickest way to get on the front of the show is just to give Andy a compliment.
5:11 Speaker 02 I actually have an email that came in on my side of the fence. Same part of the Melbourne Peninsula or Victorian Peninsula down there. And it was about a young man, I'll have to look at the emails here, that wanted to sadly report the crime that you'd committed down there. Um, you and Beck hopped out of the car and you had your dog with you, um, who'd hopped out of the horse float because it's a very tall dog. And came out of the horse float and while you were chatting to this young man and his girlfriend, um, suddenly his girlfriend's demeanor changed and you didn't know what had happened. And as they walked away, she revealed that your dog had bit her.
5:47 Speaker 03 I did not.
5:50 Speaker 03 This is a lie.
5:51 Speaker 02 Unfortunately. I'll check the email. I'm gonna have to find the email now.
5:57 Speaker 03 Not true.
5:58 Speaker 02 Um, Carly knows. Ask Carls. Yeah.
6:03 Speaker 03 My, yeah, well, I take great offence to that and I'll defend that to the hilt.
6:07 Speaker 02 Well, sadly, um, yeah, Henrietta had a bit of a nibble and, um, that was disappointing for, um, for the recipient of the peck.
6:17 Speaker 03 Um, well, you take the good bit of bad. I've got some, Tom, I've got some, I've got some. I take the, I take pet bites very seriously to see, you know, Ham. You know what sometimes happens? The authorities.
6:28 Speaker 02 Yeah.
6:28 Speaker 03 You know, sometimes, you know, sometimes happens to the dog.
6:31 Speaker 02 I've sugar coated it. I've sugar coated it.
6:33 Speaker 04 Imagine you got their dogs sent away, Hamish.
6:35 Speaker 02 I'm not getting sent away. I've actually found the email. It was from Max.
6:38 Speaker 03 It's sent away for life. That's what happens to sometimes when dogs do that.
6:42 Speaker 02 And I mean, he says things like savage in his email, which I do think is, um, an exaggeration. And they say in their family, they now refer to Henrietta as the beast of rye. And again, I think that's an exaggeration. But, um, it certainly seems to me like Max's poor partner was, um, Nipped on the hand.
7:02 Speaker 03 Fake news, but we better move on, Ham, because we've got a tall hat to talk about.
7:08 Speaker 03 Um, I've been keeping a close eye on the WhatsApp. If you're new to the podcast, welcome. By all means, we welcome anyone in and we encourage people to go back to the start. We understand that we're now at episode 301, so that is difficult.
7:20 Speaker 02 But we keep them tight.
7:21 Speaker 03 But we do keep them tight.
7:22 Speaker 02 You'll never find one over an hour.
7:24 Speaker 03 No.
7:24 Speaker 02 So barely two weeks full-time listening will get you up to speed.
7:28 Speaker 03 Yep. Um, we have never gone for a world record of anything. We've always thought it was low hanging hack content.
7:38 Speaker 02 Not interested.
7:39 Speaker 03 We.
7:39 Speaker 02 Hashtag hack content.
7:40 Speaker 03 But now it's hat content.
7:43 Speaker 02 High hanging, as it were.
7:45 Speaker 03 Yes. We are going to try and with an elite team build the tallest hat in the world. One of us will walk with it on our head or Daniel Ricciardo, if he returns our messages, because he has a strong neck from all the F1 driving he did. Um, Ham.
7:59 Speaker 02 My worry with Ricci, I'm, I'm, and I know obviously Piastri are much harder to get because he's busy on the circuit. My worry with Danny Rick is he's let his neck go.
8:08 Speaker 03 Yeah, agreed.
8:09 Speaker 02 I saw him recently, he looked a bit flabby.
8:11 Speaker 04 But is he still driving or is he completely retired and not in the car anymore?
8:15 Speaker 02 Well, he's probably not doing the neck exercises, Jack, even if he's taking off very, very fast up to the legal speed limit. He probably doesn't need to train his neck for the G-forces.
8:23 Speaker 03 Hmm.
8:24 Speaker 02 Yeah, I saw, I saw him too recently, Andy, and I, you know, it seemed like he was very agreeable, but I think it was just his head flopping.
8:30 Speaker 03 His neck was so loose.
8:32 Speaker 02 Yeah. Yeah. He's lost a lot of his neck condition. His body's still smoking.
8:37 Speaker 03 Yeah.
8:37 Speaker 02 But, um, but he's just lost that neck condition. He's not doing the specific training anymore is what I worry about.
8:41 Speaker 03 It seemed that way to me as well, Jack.
8:42 Speaker 04 Oh, well, let's not use him then.
8:43 Speaker 03 Well, no, if he does reach out, he'll have to prove his neck strength before we commission him.
8:49 Speaker 02 Yep, we need to get him back, Race, Race Fitness.
8:51 Speaker 03 Uh, I've been monitoring the WhatsApp between, um, Grace, who is our aerospace engineer and designer at university and, and also Sam, who works in compositing. And, um, and he, of course, is the one that's going to be putting, um, this whole thing together with different composites, um, of like carbon, et cetera, really light mate material with these injected moulds, which is incredible.
9:16 Speaker 04 Well, you said it was. Do you still want to play the credit for their company because they're paying for it?
9:21 Speaker 02 Oh, absolutely. Well and truly. Yeah, let's do that. Twice if needs be.
9:26 Speaker 04 The Inside Word. Conversations of tall hat construction. Thanks to Top Stage Advanced Composites, we make cool stuff out of fiberglass and carbon.
9:36 Speaker 03 And we wouldn't go anywhere except for Top Stage Advanced Composites when we get anything made, particularly tall hats.
9:45 Speaker 03 Following this, I get a bit spooked when I try and go into the suggestion because they tend to just brush me off as someone who doesn't know what I'm talking about, which is true.
9:56 Speaker 03 I do have some, they have, so in a snapshot, I'll tell you what they're talking about. They have some concerns about getting it upright. It can hold its own weight as a six metre hat, but the actual manoeuvring it from a horizontal arrival position to it being
10:14 Speaker 02 We'll be on a flatbed truck too, like
10:17 Speaker 04 Oh yeah, how's that gonna transport it?
10:18 Speaker 02 That's not going on a roof rack, like that has to be on a flatbed truck.
10:21 Speaker 03 I've got another, there's another person that's reached out that does long
10:27 Speaker 02 Dave's Snake Relocations. We've done a bloody anaconda.
10:33 Speaker 03 That's not the name of his company, but he does transport long things.
10:39 Speaker 04 Well, when you see
10:40 Speaker 02 Long Johns trucking.
10:42 Speaker 04 Yeah, you see sometimes footage of them building windmills.
10:45 Speaker 03 Yep.
10:45 Speaker 04 And they have to, on the back of the truck is one whole spine of a windmill.
10:49 Speaker 03 Yep.
10:49 Speaker 02 Yep, close down a whole city.
10:51 Speaker 03 He said, you guys haven't thought about the logistics to actually get this to site, let me do it. He seemed like he's the guy, but again, let's concentrate on getting the hat built.
10:59 Speaker 02 Cause cranes, I'm always fascinated by cranes, how they get it, because they have to build themselves.
11:04 Speaker 03 Yes, we wouldn't have that luxury.
11:06 Speaker 02 Crane, we can't build the hat on the side, it has to be one piece, doesn't it?
11:09 Speaker 04 Well, but should we crane it? Well, we have to crane it on.
11:11 Speaker 03 For structural integrity.
11:12 Speaker 02 Yes, Jack, we will.
11:13 Speaker 03 We may, well, that's what, that's what they're talking about at the moment. They're like, they, it will support its own weight. Getting it from horizontal, it's a rival position.
11:21 Speaker 02 But Jack's right, Jack's right.
11:23 Speaker 03 I mean, it's only going to be 12 kilos, we don't have to crane it.
11:26 Speaker 02 But we've both, but we both did tests earlier this week because we were talking about this off air and I was at the gym and I put a 15 kilo weight plate on my head just to feel it. Now, obviously the hat's going to be more, more comfortable than the weight plate on my head. But even just sort of feeling that centre of gravity and that's, that's an extremely low centre of gravity. It's still quite a balancing act and it made me just realise. Balance is the huge factor here. You you've gone mad if you think you can just lift the hat up straight and pop it on.
11:56 Speaker 03 Totally, someone will lower it on.
11:58 Speaker 02 We will have to have scaffolding next to it.
12:00 Speaker 03 Yeah.
12:00 Speaker 02 And it will have to be in a brace to be, it would have to be like a rocket launch scaffolding.
12:05 Speaker 03 Yep.
12:06 Speaker 02 And then the the supports come away. And look, if I can just ask now on the record, could we have some dry ice? That I think that would look cool.
12:13 Speaker 03 That'd be cool.
12:14 Speaker 02 Like they have on the rocket launch. So it's like supports are away and then the hat is freestanding on the head because the whoever's the pilot has a huge balance job on their hand.
12:24 Speaker 03 Yeah, absolutely. Jack, during the week, I put a big box of olive oil on my head and to How many kilos? It was thirteen point four. And and to coffee table books. I was just, I just had a pillow underneath it and was trying to balance on that. But I felt the same thing as Hamed is like, it's, I mean, this is.
12:43 Speaker 02 Seen that video and your hands never leave.
12:46 Speaker 03 Yeah, exactly. Just, just barely could let it go. So it's gonna be.
12:50 Speaker 02 I even just, even just putting my hands down to my side with fifteen kilos on your head, you just immediately go, if this thing falls, it's crushing toes.
12:57 Speaker 03 Yeah.
12:57 Speaker 02 It also makes it like, forget about a chin strap. You know how we were like, oh, could we have a chin strap? Could we have a chin strap?
13:02 Speaker 03 It'll rip your head off.
13:03 Speaker 02 If that thing falls, it's gonna rip your goddamn head off. So you definitely don't want a chin strap on it.
13:08 Speaker 03 Um, there's talk of putting a hard hat inside the hat that's, that which you tighten, which has, I I find nerve wracking because those hard hats sit so high.
13:19 Speaker 02 Mate, but also that, like, that's like a bike helmet too, the boa system that tightens on your head. But again, you get that too high and it starts to fall.
13:27 Speaker 03 I would be.
13:27 Speaker 02 You've now got fifteen kilos.
13:29 Speaker 03 Lower, wouldn't you?
13:30 Speaker 02 I just think for safety reasons, you actually want the bailout factor.
13:34 Speaker 03 Well, that's one thing that did come up on the WhatsApp, which we'll get to it. Um, other highlights was, he said, um, this is from Sam. Sometimes I use carbon nanotube paste for cladding and I just thought that was a cool thing to say.
13:46 Speaker 02 Uh, yes, from me, for sure.
13:49 Speaker 03 Talk of the lead brim continues. This is a brim, so the outer brim of the top hat is, has a counterweight in it. So it can keep it steady. I think you're filling it with the lead. This was the back and forth AI recreation with Sam and Grace talking about that aspect.
14:08 Speaker 06 I'm just thinking about the counterweight sitting in the brim. That's going to need to be a two-part mould.
14:14 Speaker 00 Yep, I'll mess around with the CAD and see if we can just get it with composites. But most likely we'll need a counterweight.
14:22 Speaker 06 I had a chat with my mate and he's happy to do the lead brim for us. He just needs a CAD of the brim thickened up to suit lead internals. He'll make a sand mould out of it, then we'll lay up over.
14:34 Speaker 03 And that all sounds good to me.
14:35 Speaker 02 Mate, that's good.
14:36 Speaker 03 Just want to get sign off from you three.
14:38 Speaker 02 Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it sounds just let us know what CAD programme you're using, but it sounds pretty good to me.
14:44 Speaker 03 Sam then unleashed a series of questions that he said we need to discuss. And it was all in the one WhatsApp. So I'm just gonna, I'm just gonna hit you with this one from Sam. And then I think we need to discuss all the points.
15:00 Speaker 06 Okay.
15:01 Speaker 03 Off you go.
15:02 Speaker 06 I think this is where we're up to. We either need to discuss or get approval regarding the following. One, hard hat clasp used for the mounting. Two, head diameter, who is wearing the hat? Three, head stability for potential simulation. Four, lead insert into brim for counterweight effect. Will significantly increase total weight? Should assess structural integrity of the wearer's neck. Five, possibly backup neck brace. Non-structural, but there to prevent catastrophic neck failure.
15:37 Speaker 03 That's what I'm worried about. That is what I'm worried about. So a couple of things, I thought the lead insert was built into the current weight they had. I thought they were already accounting for that. It is, but it will, it will, it will take it to around 15 kilos. So I think Hame's simulation in the gym was a good one. We'll pop that up in one of our parts. Let's go from the top though. Hard hat class, do we want them to rethink that? To me, it just seems too high on the head. I would have thought the hat we want deeper on the head.
16:07 Speaker 02 Yeah, I'd say you want the hat band to land somewhere between the eyebrows and the hairline.
16:12 Speaker 03 As low as possible.
16:14 Speaker 02 But again, as low as possible, mate. I refer you, I see above the phrase catastrophic neck failure. If this thing's plonked on your head and it's 15 kilos and it, it falls.
16:26 Speaker 03 Yep, fall with it is what I'm gonna say.
16:28 Speaker 02 Oh, I'd absolutely go fall with it and, and just, we'll have to have crash pads.
16:32 Speaker 03 Yeah.
16:33 Speaker 02 Yeah, you can't try and save it with your neck. You're not saving 15 kilos, but I just, I do think, I'm just popping it on the record, that it's a lot of force. That's why we need Danny Rick. It's a lot of force to be going through someone's neck in that moment, so.
16:49 Speaker 03 What, are you doing calculations over there? What are you writing down?
16:51 Speaker 02 I'm drawing a picture of an idea.
16:55 Speaker 02 I just want you guys to have a look at this. And it's probably easier for me to just send it to you both now, because we're over the other side of the desk. This is my idea. I think we'll need something like this again for when, because a lot of what we're talking about here is stability. And like what happens when it falls? Will it snap a neck? Will it?
17:15 Speaker 03 Yep.
17:15 Speaker 02 What's it gonna do? How tight do we want it on the head? Obviously, the tighter it is, the better your balancing shot is.
17:20 Speaker 03 Yep.
17:20 Speaker 02 But the bit higher the chance is gonna break your neck as it falls. So I think we need next to whoever's driving it. I've got two here.
17:31 Speaker 03 Oh, that's interesting, yeah. Let me describe it so.
17:36 Speaker 02 Tamas, yeah. Two, two, two hat tamers.
17:39 Speaker 03 You've got the central person who's the hat wearer and they're doing their best with their neck. And the hat sits around about three times the height of the human. But then alongside, you've got two people that are sit there corralling the hat.
17:53 Speaker 02 Yep, so very, very long sticks, maybe. Four to five metre long sticks with a big rubber stopper or a big buffer, or even just a big soft catcher.
18:01 Speaker 03 Yes.
18:02 Speaker 02 Which means if it starts to fall.
18:04 Speaker 03 Yep.
18:04 Speaker 02 You've got a hat tamer that can catch it and obviously the record attempts over for that particular run. Like you haven't set the record, but it stops.
18:11 Speaker 03 Neck preservation.
18:12 Speaker 02 Make it all the way to the ground and dying.
18:14 Speaker 03 So would you need people on both sides of the hat and then.
18:16 Speaker 02 You might need four, Jackie. You might need four. We might have a lot of hat tamers. There's no rules about how many hat tamers we can have. It's got a kind of a Jurassic Park vibe to me when they are all, you know, have the dinosaur, you know, the raptor or whatever, and there's like 20 people trying to get it into the cage.
18:33 Speaker 03 That's great. I think that's a must. So let's, let's wonder if we could get them to throw that in a carbon mold as well and get us a few catches.
18:43 Speaker 02 Can I just throw another idea in here? Obviously a four or five metre stick is really heavy too. We're gonna need slings. You'll need a sling for the hat tamer.
18:53 Speaker 03 Very similar to the.
18:55 Speaker 02 Stick in.
18:55 Speaker 03 To what the flag bearer has at the.
18:58 Speaker 02 Yes, exactly. That's what I'm thinking. That's exactly what I'm thinking. Because they figured it out. They're like, no one can last that long just holding a stick.
19:04 Speaker 03 Do we get James Tompkins along? Cause we're gonna need an extra person to.
19:09 Speaker 02 And he's got experience.
19:11 Speaker 03 And he's hot.
19:11 Speaker 02 The awesome foursome.
19:12 Speaker 03 Yeah, yeah.
19:12 Speaker 02 The awesome foursome.
19:13 Speaker 03 So he could, he could easily be one of the tamers for us. But now are we at risk that if the hat falls, it could fall on one of our tamers? And we're.
19:23 Speaker 02 They've got helmets on.
19:24 Speaker 03 Yeah, but I think it will be a glance. I mean, it's not, and it's not like, do you know what I mean?
19:29 Speaker 02 Yeah, it's not gonna crush you. It's a very light hat.
19:31 Speaker 03 It's a light hat.
19:32 Speaker 02 It's really the pilots facing the most risk. And if you've got a big hat taming stick and you can't defend yourself and you let the hat fall on you. That's kind of on you.
19:42 Speaker 03 You deserve the broken foot.
19:43 Speaker 02 And we will give them helmets. We'll obviously give them helmets, maybe shoulder pads at a, at a, at a stretch. And that, that's enough.
19:49 Speaker 03 Okay.
19:50 Speaker 02 Cricket helps. Like we'll give you a face guard.
19:52 Speaker 03 Who else is.
19:53 Speaker 02 I think we've got.
19:53 Speaker 03 Flagbird before that we could possibly get down. Enemies? She might be, she might be used to this.
19:58 Speaker 02 I mean, Jess Fox.
19:59 Speaker 03 Jess Fox.
20:00 Speaker 02 Yeah. Like absolutely love to have Jess's expertise.
20:03 Speaker 03 Yep.
20:04 Speaker 02 Cause again, you remember you get someone like Jess on board. She'd almost be a good pilot because some of the training she does is wild. But you get someone like Jess on board and they've got the mind.
20:14 Speaker 03 She can never compete again.
20:15 Speaker 02 Don't want to break Jess's.
20:16 Speaker 03 No.
20:17 Speaker 02 We.
20:18 Speaker 04 She would be, she would be good with the prodding sticks then because she's held up the flag and she holds all.
20:24 Speaker 03 It's like a paddle. Steve Hooker knows how to hold a big stick.
20:26 Speaker 04 Oh, perfect.
20:28 Speaker 02 Pole vaulter, absolutely.
20:29 Speaker 03 Gold medalist pole vaulter. So you get him down with the stick potentially. Um, anyway, we'll come back to the actual hat. They're asking at the moment, who's wearing it? I think we don't need to do that now, but we need to have some kind of competition. Jack, do you want to throw your hat in the ring or your head in the ring?
20:45 Speaker 04 I, I don't anymore. Like at the start, I wanted the glory of it, but I actually, I'm actually worried about the danger of it.
20:52 Speaker 03 Okay. So it's a two man race.
20:54 Speaker 02 It is, Ando, and I, I dare say it's now, it has a different feel to it, doesn't it? Because I think it should be just one of us. I think we need to know who the pilot is for, for head measuring reasons or just for the day. We just need to know who the pilot is. Do we let the hat decide?
21:12 Speaker 03 How?
21:12 Speaker 02 Do we, when we make the hat, do we tip it upside down? Put two names in the hat.
21:18 Speaker 04 Pick a name out of the world's tallest hat.
21:21 Speaker 02 So we, we drop a name in the hat, let it flutter down to the bottom. It might take an hour. And then, then we get up.
21:27 Speaker 03 How do we get it?
21:28 Speaker 02 Well, we have, we'll have to get on a.
21:29 Speaker 04 Maybe put them on magnets. Maybe put them on, you know, they do those.
21:31 Speaker 02 Or a little hook and we put a fish line, fishing line down and you just try, you just put the fishing line in there and wait till it brings up.
21:37 Speaker 03 Well, I was thinking a magnet.
21:38 Speaker 02 A name.
21:39 Speaker 03 A magnet would be easier.
21:40 Speaker 02 Just wait, it won't always get both of them.
21:42 Speaker 04 Yeah, it might magnet both.
21:44 Speaker 03 Right. Well, could you have it so like whatever's the outermost one is it? Or if it only gets one?
21:48 Speaker 02 Oh, it'd be the innermost because it caught it first.
21:51 Speaker 03 Maybe that then. Or do you think just one? I mean, I.
21:54 Speaker 04 I like going fishing. That's like hook it.
21:57 Speaker 02 If you had a name with a hook, you could just jangle it down. It might come up empty a few times, but eventually you can get one of the names.
22:03 Speaker 03 I don't like the chances of getting a name with a hook down the bottom.
22:08 Speaker 02 I mean.
22:09 Speaker 03 Six meter tight.
22:11 Speaker 02 But you create a wide loop down there for the hook to catch on to.
22:14 Speaker 03 Okay.
22:15 Speaker 02 And so we just. We easily catchable names.
22:17 Speaker 03 Okay.
22:18 Speaker 02 Then the hat.
22:21 Speaker 02 Like the, what's the hat in Harry Potter, Jack?
22:23 Speaker 03 The sorting hat?
22:23 Speaker 02 Yep.
22:24 Speaker 03 But how do we turn it upside down? And they were worried about even getting it standing upright.
22:28 Speaker 02 With giant effort, but I don't even think they'll even to tick off on our way to the record. The longest hat to draw a name out of, like, we'll just actually, we'll pick that up.
22:39 Speaker 03 That'll be two records.
22:41 Speaker 02 That'll be two records. What I'm saying is like, before we even get to the launchpad, we'll just have one for free.
22:45 Speaker 03 Yep.
22:45 Speaker 02 So we let the hat decide, because you know about the same head shape.
22:48 Speaker 03 Yeah.
22:48 Speaker 02 Let's just go build it for, build it for roughly us.
22:50 Speaker 03 Yep.
22:51 Speaker 02 Have a slight tightening mechanism on it if you want.
22:53 Speaker 03 Yep.
22:54 Speaker 02 We're really gonna need those hat wranglers because the other thing is for the hat tamers, it's not so much to protect the neck of the pilot. I mean, it is, but it's also because if that thing falls even onto cars, it'll snap.
23:06 Speaker 03 Yeah, and we want multiple goes.
23:08 Speaker 02 And we want, there's nothing to say we can't have 20 shots at this. So
23:11 Speaker 03 Yep.
23:11 Speaker 02 Really, as long as the hat wranglers do their job, we can keep having attempts.
23:17 Speaker 03 Love it.
23:18 Speaker 02 Let the hat decide.
23:24 Speaker 03 I've left it two weeks to see if the initial response would die down. It was a negative response to me, Ham, about something I did to Jack a couple of weeks ago.
23:34 Speaker 02 I know, I know, I've seen it play out.
23:37 Speaker 03 Yep.
23:37 Speaker 02 And look, people mention it to me.
23:39 Speaker 03 But people have come up to me and like, almost console me, like I've lost a family member or a pet or something and go, I heard what Andy did to you.
23:46 Speaker 02 Yes.
23:47 Speaker 03 Yeah. And then pat me on the shoulder.
23:49 Speaker 02 Yes.
23:49 Speaker 03 And this is of course reading out a golf score that you had that got sent to me.
23:54 Speaker 02 Yep.
23:55 Speaker 03 And it's divided, I mean, people that don't play golf understood what was happening and definitely felt.
24:00 Speaker 02 You could hear, you could, I mean, it's not hard to tell when a man's having his dignity ripped out of his soul.
24:06 Speaker 03 The anguish.
24:06 Speaker 02 Live on a podcast and laid out to bear. I mean, it would almost, it was up there with going, Jack, actually got an email here from the girl you asked your virginity with, and she.
24:18 Speaker 02 She had a lot of critiques. I won't read the whole thing, but clumsy rush, is it?
24:26 Speaker 02 We're going round and round like he didn't know what was going on. I mean, that's pretty damning stuff in there. In fact, let's read it out.
24:33 Speaker 02 That's what it felt like. It was wild. It was wild. It was too much, especially for someone, you know, I'm in the same boat. We're both at the beginning of whether it's golf or anything you're trying to learn. You know, you don't want your, um, you don't want your earnest attempts to get better dissected live on air. And so when I arrived, uh, the golf clubs, the N A D Beach Golf Club, and the guy behind there, Scotty goes,
24:58 Speaker 02 when I, when I went up to pay, he goes, whoo, what you did to Jack that? Then Scotty, Scotty's a lovely fellow. And I was like, all right, yeah.
25:07 Speaker 03 That would be some silver lining though, if you start getting blacklisted from golf clubs because you've broken some kind of.
25:12 Speaker 02 He had a small giggle at the.
25:15 Speaker 02 Let me finish. He went, whoo. Loved it.
25:21 Speaker 03 Anyway, a lot of people have been direct messaging me and emailing at hamishamy.com. I'm sure you've got these on your side.
25:26 Speaker 02 I'm sorry, Andy. Can I read a quick one? It actually comes from Callum, the guy that, um, sent it in in the first place. And he said, it's, you know, this is the guy that spotted Jack in the wild and saw him struggling with his cart that had run out of batteries. And then he says, look, I only sent, you know, I only sent the scorecard in more as evidence that I'd seen Jack and that I'd been there. And he goes, but I just, he said, the fallout's been horrible for him. He said, um,
25:53 Speaker 03 For him?
25:54 Speaker 02 Yeah, for him, because he feels like he, he, he caused this chain of.
25:57 Speaker 03 If he'd never sent anything, I could never have read anything.
26:01 Speaker 02 He goes, my, my regular Sunday group have ousted me. Some, some invites to popular courses I had coming up have mysteriously cancelled. I'm a pariah at the club because people assume I support Andy's vicious attack. Um, he said, I don't think there's anything that can be done about it. Then he says, unless, hmm, maybe just thinking here, maybe if Andy's contacts at Taylor Made set me up with, I don't know, maybe like a nine degrees stiff Q I thirty five five, a thirteen degree R seven mini, Q I thirty five five wood, pitching wedge, some irons, maybe a fifty, fifty four and fifty eight degree MG four wedges, something like that. And maybe thirty four inch new spider Z T putter, something like that. Help him, he was wondering.
26:42 Speaker 04 I don't see how Callum becomes the victim in that.
26:45 Speaker 02 I would love it if he weaseled a free seat and flops out of his. Callum walks away with a brand new car.
26:54 Speaker 07 Um, and that hasn't happened to him. That's just a weasel maneuver from him.
26:59 Speaker 04 Now you got a rail.
26:59 Speaker 07 But a lot of people have written in saying, can you apologize and can you do it in song? Cause we know that the number one way we apologize on this show is through song. Of course, I will, uh, Jack, I feel terrible. Hence, I got in earlier this morning and, uh, put this together. I'm a very sorry man who desires nothing more to be forgiven for his sin. Jack is very new to golf, so I should have supported him. A sorry man am I, as golf is just a game. You play against yourselves and no one else.
27:41 Speaker 07 So comparing Al Jack to others has brought me shame.
27:48 Speaker 07 I'm just a very sorry man.
27:53 Speaker 02 What song is this?
27:55 Speaker 07 I'm a very sorry man. And I want to make it clear that what I did just wasn't great. When you were starting out at golf, you can't expect to hit them straight. A sorry man am I to cause a giggle fest. Comments were made that threw some shade. When Jack was simply out there giving his best. I'm just a very sorry man.
28:34 Speaker 07 But while I'm giving sorrys out.
28:37 Speaker 02 Oh.
28:37 Speaker 07 There's a few more I should do. I feel sorry for the trees, yes, the bark and the leaves. Jack hits with his slice every time he forgets to follow through. And while I'm giving sorrys out, I feel sorry for his buggy. It can't even make it round as it covers too much ground zigzagging every fairing. You would have to stop three times for a plug in.
29:03 Speaker 07 And while I'm on this sorry train, I offer one to the maintenance man. Having to mend all Jack's diverts must cost him a billion a year in sand. So while I'm giving sorrys out, there's another I should do. To tailor made who sends him balls that he doesn't pay for at all. They get lost before the cup and the factory can't keep up. But I'm very, very sorry, Jack, to you.
29:36 Speaker 07 Bit of an odd ending there, but yeah, it's a key change and we couldn't, anyway.
29:40 Speaker 04 Oh, what a shame that it was a backhanded sorry song. What a shame.
29:44 Speaker 02 With an attempted weasel in it.
29:47 Speaker 07 It was just sorry to everybody, Jack.
29:50 Speaker 02 No, that is true. All bases covered.
29:52 Speaker 04 I accept the first part.
29:54 Speaker 02 In all seriousness, because usually we do the song to like a well-known shit.
29:58 Speaker 04 I felt like we were that night that we went to watch Andy's theater show again, when he had to go back and perform at his high school.
30:05 Speaker 02 I was waiting for it to become singing in the rain or something. I was like, this must have a bit that we all recognize. Now, either I've just missed one of the classics, but what is, is that an AI?
30:16 Speaker 04 It's original. Isn't it original?
30:18 Speaker 02 Nah, it's not original. Well, it wouldn't surprise us, to be honest.
30:22 Speaker 04 It's from My Fair Lady.
30:24 Speaker 02 Oh, my God.
30:27 Speaker 04 What's the original lyric? Um, he's not, is he a sorry man in that or is he something else? Or is he a jolly, jolly man? He's an ordinary.
30:35 Speaker 02 Ordinary man, yeah. Yeah, because I was just like, where's the, where's the hook?
30:41 Speaker 02 Where's, where's the Fred Astaire tap dance?
30:53 Speaker 02 Hey, look, they keep coming in. People wanted to share ideas about power moves. Sometimes it happens to you, you realise that you've been done.
31:02 Speaker 03 Sometimes it's the best way to, you feel the power just whoosh out of your body and go to the other person and you're like, well, I'd love to have that feeling on the other side of it.
31:11 Speaker 02 And it's a cautionary tale. You have to tell everybody so that it doesn't happen to them. Um, of course, power moves.
31:20 Speaker 02 Can I also say, not until I had an 11 year old of my own, did I realise what a great book the Power Moves book is for, I'm going to say, young boys aged sort of nine to 14.
31:34 Speaker 03 Yeah, I called you on the.
31:36 Speaker 02 It teaches them a lot.
31:36 Speaker 03 I called you on the, uh, and you're in the car with Sonny today and he, Sonny was reading them from the back seat.
31:41 Speaker 02 Just engrossed in power moves. It's basically a manual for life.
31:44 Speaker 03 Yep.
31:45 Speaker 02 I feel like I could leave on a business trip for weeks. I'm not going to, but I could and just leave the Power Moves book and go, it's all in here, son. Live for years and go scruffle his head and go, I've distilled everything I know into this book.
32:00 Speaker 03 And if anyone.
32:00 Speaker 02 Like I said, I won't, I won't. You do still need to be there.
32:03 Speaker 03 Yeah. But if anyone decides to read it all on YouTube, Gordy might one day hear it as well.
32:10 Speaker 02 An audio book of power moves would be nice. I guess that's kind of what this segment is.
32:16 Speaker 02 Let's not be too hasty this. Not completely erode the iceberg we're standing on. We do need a little something.
32:23 Speaker 03 Um, hamishandy.com, of course. Um, the Hogs is a Madman, um, uh, price is still there, um, after he over ordered on Power Moves book too.
32:34 Speaker 02 We do have a lot of version two. Do we have any version one?
32:36 Speaker 03 I don't think so.
32:37 Speaker 02 No, that's been sold out for a long time, but version two, bloody good. That was the one Sonny was reading the other day. Um, and a haircut power move. Um, we've had a few in the past. My actual favourite haircut power move, which I think is in the Power Moves book too, which isn't today's one, was the one where, when you want to shave your head, go and ask for a short back and sides. And then after they do it, go, you know what, just shave it all off.
33:03 Speaker 02 Trying to look like they didn't get, they did not, not to scratch, but this is another good one. Comes in from Jared VB. If you're in line waiting to have a haircut and you do have some time to kill, when you're up next, let the person that was behind you go ahead. Just look at their hair and say, you obviously need this more than mine.
33:25 Speaker 03 I love it. This one came in from Georgia. She goes, a niche move that can only be used a few times in life, if at all. And it's when you or your partner is pregnant and you're at the 20 week mark. Okay. So very niche power move, but any new or upcoming parents?
33:46 Speaker 02 I mean, if you, if you've just found out you're pregnant, get excited. Know that this is, you know, merely weeks away.
33:51 Speaker 03 During the 20 week scan, wait for your partner to say it has your nose or any other feature and simply reply, I'd hope so.
34:05 Speaker 03 He writes implying that their nose is a bit shit.
34:08 Speaker 02 We forget it.
34:11 Speaker 03 Why, why do you just have to use that at the 20 week mark? You can use it any time after that.
34:15 Speaker 02 Anytime anyone remarks on a baby, I suppose. But I mean, it definitely, definitely different levels of danger depending on whether you are the mum or the dad, I reckon in that situation.
34:26 Speaker 03 Agreed. I think this one plays out for mums better. Um, as Jordan puts.
34:30 Speaker 02 This is from Tom Peak. He said, you've got to be a bit of time on your hands. Print out a flyer that says, we buy crap cars for cheap. Stick it on your mate's windshield.
34:45 Speaker 03 Love it. Another car one, Ham. This is an accidental power move. Tim writes in.
34:52 Speaker 03 He said, I parked my bike at work and saw someone was sneaking a park in the director of another company's car park. I said, careful mate. Heard that guy's a real princess about his car space. He said, this is my car space.
35:10 Speaker 02 Good. That's good.
35:14 Speaker 02 Intricate one here from Brett Honey, but it's, it's good. Good. Said, I witnessed a cracking power move at the pub a couple of weeks ago. I walked up to the urinal, there was an older gentleman there on the left already. So I assumed the far right position in what is a three person urinal. Yes. Okay. So you've got old guy on the left, empty spot, and then Brett's on the right. Yep. That is the correct approach. Yes, a hundred percent. For females listening, that is absolutely. You would never do it any other way. It would almost be. It's strange when someone goes. Someone would call the cops if they went middle. Yeah. Someone goes middle. Because as I was doing my business, another young fella approaches to take the middle position. Which is allowed. That's fine. Yep. The only one available. The old bloke on the left says, come on, we've got room for a small one.
36:01 Speaker 02 It has to be an old guy, doesn't it? So much better.
36:10 Speaker 02 I need to share with you guys something that happened the other night and give, I think, you know, hopefully in a humble way, in a non pretentious way, like give our listeners, give our audience who we adore, a peek into the life of what it's like to be a billboard slash rent a car celebrity.
36:32 Speaker 03 When's that deal finished?
36:33 Speaker 02 Yeah.
36:35 Speaker 03 Did you check the contract?
36:37 Speaker 02 Never. I am a permanent fixture at Sydney and Melbourne airports. I think it's just at Sydney and Melbourne now.
36:42 Speaker 03 I feel like a guy took up golf because he did an ad where he was golfing. I was so embarrassed that he was being a phone. He decided.
36:50 Speaker 02 Truth.
36:50 Speaker 03 A lot of people see that.
36:52 Speaker 02 I will say this, those Hertz billboards have been up for a while and.
36:55 Speaker 03 It feels like when.
36:56 Speaker 02 Testament to the product, to the quality. Because, and actually Rudy, Rudy, my daughter said that, that she goes, you look quite young. Yeah. You look young. And I was like, well, it was, I probably took that photo about half your life ago. It's been a few years with those billboards, right? So if you've been to Sydney or Melbourne airport, and I think they do appear at other airports around the country. You'll still see me featured as a beloved member of the Hertz team on the ads. Out of the goodness of your heart, yeah? Love job. One of the causes I'm passionate about, passionate about a lot of causes, but certainly finding the best rent a car company for you and your needs is one of my causes. No money exchange chance whatsoever. Uh, no, not physically hand to hand.
37:39 Speaker 02 I can say, I can say hand on heart. No, there was no. Good. Money exchange hand to hand. So I landed at Melbourne Airport, um, the other night. I was just down, I was down quickly for a couple of days. That's why I'm sending you to Melbourne. Did you go, sorry, just quickly, did you go through a period of like, oh God, it's there again? And now you're at the other side of it? Or have you always? I don't even notice it.
38:01 Speaker 02 I would get sent it once a week by friends, right? Who are doing the slightly interesting thing. Only a few people have noticed this, but. The thing about the campaign, well, originally the, the, the let's go campaign was Tom Brady in America. So they go, hey, this is the ad we wanted to do. And it's Tom Brady and I'm like.
38:22 Speaker 02 I said, just don't tell the American head you're reporting to. So how many like, what is the Super Bowl called in Australia? Don't worry, don't worry, don't worry about that. So it was kind of a little bit modeled off that campaign. Holding the car keys and saying let's go. A couple of people have made some like keys in the bowl party jokes. Like, kind of looks like I'm advertising swingers parties, because I am holding car keys. It feels like to me like you're driving us all. Yeah, which is not the service.
38:50 Speaker 02 My car and you're not there to drive me. No, do it yourself. That's our whole motto. That's our whole thing. Um, we, there's a whole nother rank of people that will drive you at the airport. That's not their product. They're, it's doing the other thing, but you drive yourself. So landing Melbourne, yeah. And the billboards are still there. Each time I wonder, like, I wonder if they'll still be up, they're still there. At Melbourne Airport is obviously the terminal and you have to go across to the car park. Like there's a multi-story car park. Yes. In the middle, that's where all the car rental offices are next to each other. I had said, I had booked the car. And I had said something like, I'll be in at like two o'clock in the afternoon. Then a few things changed and I was like, no, no, I'm going to go after the kids are in bed. So like last flight down.
39:32 Speaker 02 You arrive at like 10 o'clock at night. I go across to the office and say to the lady in there, I said, sorry. I think I was, I think I said I'd be here at two o'clock because they wanna know when you're coming in. I think I said I'd be here at two o'clock, but I'm, I'm obviously eight hours late. I said, but um, you know, we're not gonna get upset at the family. I said, I think, you know, all good because we're all in the same family. We're waiting for a bit of recognition. And she said, sorry. So what, what family? What name is it?
40:03 Speaker 02 No, I'm the guy on the billboard. No, no, I'm just saying I'm part of the Hertz family. And she said, it's, your name is Hertz? No, no, sorry. My name's, uh, it should be under Blake. Hamish Blake. I said, but I'm, I'm just making, I'm just saying, because I'm part of the, I work for Hertz. I'm the guy on the billboards. And then behind her is a giant Hertz billboard. You wanna? She looks around, but it's just a guy in a business suit and another lady, like it's a generic one. And so she looks at the billboard, looks back and goes, oh, well, I'm actually, I'm not that guy.
40:38 Speaker 02 Weirdly that she would have recognized that guy more than you. Well, I guess she sits in front of him every day. I go, but I'm the guy on the terminal. I have the terminal billboards. And she goes, I don't go on the terminal.
40:52 Speaker 02 Did you wanna walk or across?
40:55 Speaker 02 I think they're closing up because I was on the last flight, but I, I think if we asked the security guard, they could let us in. I could show you some of the sides if you want. Yeah. So, no, I did, I did go to the terminal. Yep. And then that's when I realized, of course you don't. You don't fly to work.
41:12 Speaker 02 I hope you don't live on the Goldie and fly to Melbourne every day to, to work here. No. No. So I just had to do a bit of, ah, well, just, just, just, just the car. Thanks. And they'll, yeah, see you at the Christmas party. And I'd imagine, uh, exceptional service? Unbelievable.
41:29 Speaker 02 We wouldn't let you down.
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