5 Things You Need to Hear Before Going Back to School

In this episode of the GaryVee Audio Experience, I talk about hating school, college as the singular racket, and why you can't teach entrepreneurship. I share the exact script for a 22-year-old to ask their parents for 18 months to explore, and why you really, really don't want to be 47 and hating your parents because you didn't have the balls to try. I also discuss self-awareness, who you're scared to fail in front of, and why this is the greatest era to ever be alive if you're willing to stop complaining and go. You'll learn about: • Why College Is The Racket • The Greatest Five-Year Window • Asking Parents For 18 Months to Try • Self-Awareness Over Fear

• 0:00Speaker 00

  Welcome to the Gary Vee Audio Experience. My name is Courtney Connect from Team Gary and in today's episode you'll be hearing Gary talk on five different topics that you need to hear before heading back to school this fall, including how to deal with parents' expectations, why school is just one path to success, and much more. If you enjoy this podcast episode, let him know your thoughts on Twitter. Tag him @GaryVee. You'll enjoy it.

• 0:24Speaker 01

  This is the Gary Vee Audio Experience.

• 0:29Speaker 01

  Like I'm a very happy kid, but I hated school. Like on a different planet. I was getting Ds and Fs. And the world was telling me I was a loser. My teachers were telling me a loser. My friend's parents weren't saying to my face that I was a loser, but I could see it in their eye that I didn't think I'd be successful because the game I played, unlike today's game, in the 80s, early 90s, was school was the way out. Going to Harvard was the great accomplishment. Not building Facebook or Instagram or being a successful entrepreneur. It was a different landscape. And so, you know, the why was to fucking stick it to everybody. Like I used to sit there as a 13, 14, 15, 16-year-old and look at my class and my teachers and I'm like, "I'm gonna show you. I'm gonna show all of you. You think I suck?

• 1:13Speaker 01

  I'm gonna be the biggest, best person on earth."

• 1:28Speaker 01

  What's the thing you did the most? In your life, what's the thing you did the most that you hated?

• 1:33Speaker 02

  I, oh my god, went to school for fucking ever.

• 1:37Speaker 01

  Yeah!

• 1:38Speaker 02

  Forever.

• 1:38Speaker 01

  Yes, from 6 to 18, I hated life. College is the racket. It is the singular racket, college loans, that you can't even declare bankruptcy to get out of. That gives you a piece of paper that does not map to anything that's going on in the real world. Zero. Other than the jobs, lawyers, doctors. I know the cliche shit, but I'm talking business. And you're not watching this for lawyer shit. So, business just does not map. Is if you are watching this and you are collecting debt to go to college to be a business person? Quit right now. Send this email to mom. "Sorry, mom, fuck off." Let's start with this. I fully, fully, 100,000% with no hedge, do not believe that you can teach entrepreneurship.

• 2:22Speaker 01

  Right? So that's awkward.

• 2:24Speaker 03

  If there were a defined path to success, especially in any sort of creative endeavor, everyone would just follow that defined path. There is no defined path. And college can be a great way to help you find one of those paths, but it is certainly not the only way and it's certainly not a guarantee that you'll find that trajectory.

• 2:39Speaker 01

  I'm scared that you don't realize that you're entering the greatest five-year window of your life. For you to attack the life that you want to win, not because it's the secret or because the world's so zen, because it's fucking hard as shit out there. You get to live life one time. And this is the time right now to understand what's actually happening and actually map your behavior to something that will impact you for the next 80 years. Promise me that you understand that the land grab of happiness starts right now. If you're lucky enough to be graduating today with not a fucking idea of what you're gonna do with your future, nobody's ever been luckier than you. Please recognize.

• 3:19Speaker 00

  This next clip is an old moment from an AskGaryVee show where Gary dives deep into how to deal with expectations from your parents and how to approach having a tough conversation. So if you're a college student or getting ready to go to college, thinking of go to college, pay close attention. This moment's for you.

• 3:34Speaker 02

  How do I just, like, how do I tell my friends? Like, "I just wanna go do for 18 months." And I've been getting now, like, all these of like, "Just go do and explore."

• 3:45Speaker 01

  So what? They want you to get the safe job after college? Is that what you're saying? Just tell them, Nate. You're a big boy. It's time.

• 3:52Speaker 02

  Okay, okay.

• 3:54Speaker 01

  I mean, really. And listen, listen. Easy for me to say because your dad might punch you in the mouth. Right? Like, I get it.

• 3:59Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 3:59Speaker 01

  But here's what's interesting about a lot of my advice. It's black and white. Like, you know your parents. Like, clearly, your signals and your nuances haven't worked because they continue to want you to go down that path. They are not responding to you. They're responding to what they grew up with and what they believe religiously. Right?

• 4:19Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 4:21Speaker 01

  So, so that means, that means the soft way of like, "Hey, maybe," or like, like them want. Like, that's not working, right? Am I right? I'm asking you.

• 4:30Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah, that's totally right. I keep getting these lectures and all that.

• 4:35Speaker 01

  It's time for you to lecture your parents back.

• 4:38Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 4:38Speaker 01

  One of you is gonna be right.

• 4:41Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 4:41Speaker 01

  Let me promise you one thing. You really, really don't wanna be 47 and hate your parents.

• 4:48Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 4:48Speaker 01

  Because I promise you, you're not actually hating your parents. You're hating yourself for not having the balls to do it.

• 4:54Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 4:55Speaker 01

  You want me to come over and have that talk with you?

• 4:58Speaker 02

  That'd be great, but, yeah.

• 5:01Speaker 01

  You think you got this?

• 5:02Speaker 02

  Okay, yeah, I'll, yeah, I'll give them a call right after this.

• 5:05Speaker 01

  Dude, call them right now and tweet me how it went.

• 5:08Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 5:08Speaker 01

  Now, you know, I'm gonna literally have, since Chris isn't doing anything, I'm gonna have you bother, he's gonna bother you the rest of the day. I want, listen, while we're, like, let me pump you up a little bit more. I will be your corner man.

• 5:18Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 5:18Speaker 01

  You start with mom and dad, or mom or dad, whoever you get. "I love you. I love you."

• 5:23Speaker 02

  Okay, yeah.

• 5:24Speaker 01

  "I'm 23 years old, 22 years old. Once I'm done with this, I did this for you. Now I have to do something for myself." It's high risk, high reward, but when you're 23, that's what you do because I'm not gonna be able to do this when I'm 47 because it's not gonna be practical. It is practical, mom and dad, for me for 18 months to just go and do and discover myself. I've been doing the thing for you my whole life. It's time that I do something for me. And if you can't support me in that, that's fine. I'd prefer you do, but I've gotta do this as a man.

• 5:54Speaker 02

  Okay, yeah.

• 5:56Speaker 01

  You don't sound pumped enough, Nate.

• 5:59Speaker 01

  What are you scared of? Talk to me, help me. I'm not letting, this is why I'm doing the call-in show. Because the old show, I would've done your tweet. I would've answered it. I would've felt great. And then you wouldn't have done it. And I could feel like I've almost got you there, but I'm telling you right now, I don't think you're gonna do it. And if you're gonna do it, you're gonna do it half-assed. So help me here. While you, listen, I'm on your team. So help me here, understand what you're scared of. Tell me, tell me the truth.

• 6:22Speaker 02

  Yeah, okay, yeah, okay. So for me, like, like, just because of like, you know, like the pedigree and like how much education and like they've sacrificed, like, having a safe job so I can do what I want? Like, I don't wanna like disappoint, if that makes sense?

• 6:36Speaker 01

  Nate, Nate, Nate, let me help you here. Disappoint for 18 months and then make them feel good again.

• 6:42Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 6:42Speaker 01

  I mean, just tell them, tell them, listen, "I love you for that." Means you're appreciative and you love your parents. Tell them the truth. Start with that. "I don't want to." Like, either your parents love you and will respond to you or they love you, but they're so deep into structure and it's been their whole religion, their whole life, that they're incapable, even though they love you, to break through and see it a different way? The problem is, it's your fucking life and it's gonna end up one way or the other.

• 7:09Speaker 02

  Wow, yeah, that's just broke through, yeah.

• 7:12Speaker 01

  Like, like, like, it's not that they're, right? Like, you've just gotta tell them, like, "I don't wanna let you down." And just remind them, it's only 18 months. Tell them for the next fucking 60 years, you can do the same thing that makes them feel great. You need 18 months. Can they give you 18 months? All you want is 18 months.

• 7:29Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I wrote down the date, November 12th, 2018.

• 7:32Speaker 01

  Sign a fucking bullshit contract. Give them, give yourself 18 months and then show them.

• 7:38Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 7:39Speaker 01

  Are you gonna, are you gonna do it now?

• 7:41Speaker 02

  Yep, I'm gonna hang up and call right now.

• 7:43Speaker 01

  Help me understand who is gonna be more critical? Who do you think's more, more scared of this move?

• 7:49Speaker 02

  My mom.

• 7:50Speaker 01

  Okay, just go there, man. Just like, like, just say, "Mom, I love you with all my heart. I'm so thankful for your sacrifices. All I need is 18 months. I can't live with this regret in my 30s, 40s, or 50s because I'm gonna crack and I'm gonna be a broken man. I need 18 months. And I promise you, if I can't get traction, I'll go wherever the hell you want me to work."

• 8:10Speaker 02

  Yep, yep, that's good. I'll give them a call right now and I'll tweet you in 20 minutes.

• 8:16Speaker 01

  Give it to me. Make me a video. I want the video, I wanna see your face. I don't want the words.

• 8:19Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 8:20Speaker 01

  All right, I love you. Good luck. Do it.

• 8:21Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 8:22Speaker 01

  All right.

• 8:22Speaker 02

  Bye.

• 8:23Speaker 01

  Hey, everybody, I hope you're enjoying the podcast right now. Make sure you follow the podcast. That's why I'm interrupting. Let's keep going on this show, but follow the podcast. It'll make my mom super happy.

• 8:34Speaker 04

  Hey, Gary, my name is Richard.

• 8:35Speaker 01

  Hey, Richard.

• 8:36Speaker 04

  My daughter's 17. She's going to a meeting tonight with my wife.

• 8:39Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 8:40Speaker 04

  To discuss with her school, her university options, what she wants to do. She's incredibly courageous, marketing mind, communications mind. I'm taping you right now and I'd like you to talk to her like she was your 17-year-old daughter in terms of how she should consider her university career, how she should maximize that experience to prepare her for the world that you see she may be entering into.

• 9:05Speaker 01

  So...

• 9:07Speaker 04

  Her name is Kiara.

• 9:08Speaker 01

  Kiara, I have no idea what's about to happen, but it's about to get interesting, Kiara. Here's what I would say, Kiara. I would tell you that there is not a school on earth, not a university or college that exists that is even remotely equipped to educate you properly on communications and marketing in the world we live in today. So, I have no interest, Kiara, to get your mom and dad mad at me, but I would tell you that here would be my four-year strategy. I would go to university, especially... Is she going here in Canada?

• 9:45Speaker 04

  She's talking about NYU, she's talking about San Fran.

• 9:48Speaker 01

  Is she collecting debt, or are you guys paying for it?

• 9:50Speaker 04

  I think she's just enamored by big brands.

• 9:53Speaker 01

  But is she gonna pay for college?

• 9:54Speaker 04

  Yeah, well, yeah, we're paying for it.

• 9:56Speaker 01

  So she's not collecting debt?

• 9:57Speaker 04

  No, well, yeah, I apologize. We're paying for it, and yeah, she's gonna have to collect debt along the way.

• 10:01Speaker 01

  All right, Kiara, you're gonna have to have a weird conversation with your mom and dad,

• 10:07Speaker 01

  because the first thing I'm passionate about is for you to not have any debt. Because if you're gonna go to a business that is gonna sell you a shit product that you are then gonna pay compounded interest in, that you can't even declare bankruptcy to get out of, that's called extortion fucked up fucking crazy-ass shit.

• 10:30Speaker 01

  But, but Kiara, if that number's not that high, and you can get some other things that drives down that cost, the second move would be to take your last four-year vacation of your life, hook up a whole bunch, have... Or, or not, you know, depending on your own radar, Kiara, that might be one dude seven, that's on you, don't let them judge.

• 10:53Speaker 04

  She's a nice, good, Christian girl now.

• 10:54Speaker 01

  I'm sure she is.

• 10:58Speaker 01

  And, if you want to learn about marketing and communications, spend a lot of time online and consume relevant 2017 content from people that are actually doing it, not professors that are so not practical and so romantic of how it used to be, that I've traveled the best universities in the world and have literally thrown up all over myself while I've been prepped to talk, listening to the horseshit that those professors are shoving down these kids' throats.

• 11:36Speaker 01

  You're welcome, brother. Love you.

• 11:39Speaker 05

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• 12:47Speaker 00

  This last moment that you need to hear before heading back to school this fall is one I chose to put at the end, because at 26 years old, I think if I would have listened to this clip on repeat every single day throughout my high school and college years, I think it would have greatly improved my mindset, especially because that time period of your life is a time period where you're trying new things, figuring out what you don't like, figuring out what you do like, and really how you work and operate as a human being. And the last thing anyone should be worried about during that time period of trying new things is what another person thinks. So, I think this clip would have helped me learn, start the process of learning that a lot sooner, at a younger age. So without further ado, here's Carrie V.

• 13:26Speaker 01

  You forgot, you don't wanna deal in reality. All my friends talking about all these changes and Brexit and presidential... You have to deal with the reality of the situation. Dwelling, and pondering, and crying doesn't do shit. And it especially doesn't do shit in this eco-chamber. In this arena, there is no crying. You can cry, you're just gonna lose. And I have bad news about complaining and crying. Let me tell you something about complaining and crying that's really, really gonna hurt for all you complainers out there. Nobody gives a shit.

• 14:05Speaker 01

  And let me give you a preview, who gives a shit. The following people give a shit when you complain. The other losers around you.

• 14:17Speaker 01

  Your sick, broken parent that secretly wants to hold you down so that you're not more successful than them. And let me remind you one more time, the other fucking losers around you. So, here we are, heading into 2017. People are asking all sorts of questions. We still clearly are close, or it has to happen sooner than later, economic crush. Many people here, rich on paper. Go talk to a lot of 40 to 50-year-olds that were rich on paper during Web 1.0 back in 99, 2000, 2001. It's sitting, it's flustering, it's here, it's upon us,

• 14:59Speaker 01

  and now, we have to, more than ever, we have to start deploying self-awareness. If you leave here and start your process of really knowing what makes you happy, of who are you really, if you could stop chipping away the voices from the outside, if you can start figuring out what you're scared of, if you want to actually do something, even in the light of the picture that I'm painting right now, who are you scared to fail in front of? The reason so many of you are not doing what you wanna do is you're scared to fail in some... You're scared that your brother will judge you, your wife, your girlfriend, your husband, and most scary, your mom or your dad. You need to eliminate that and/or

• 15:41Speaker 01

  own that fear and put yourself in a position to succeed. Because with all of this, with all of this, we are now in the greatest era. For the first time ever, with no fucking money, with no goddamn connections, this can put you on the map. If you're good enough, if you are good enough to be up here, to make bling bling, if you are good enough, nobody's stopping you. Not fucking Donald Trump, not the fucking Russians, nobody.

• 16:14Speaker 01

  If you are a minority, if you are a female, if you are transgender, if you're a fucking alien, the market doesn't give a fuck. If you make the best shit, you will win. Do you know how sucky it was to be a nerd 20 years ago?

• 16:32Speaker 01

  But now the market is rewarding fucking nerds, and now they're rock stars.

• 16:39Speaker 01

  Clap it up if you're a fucking nerd!

• 16:46Speaker 01

  The best part about that was, some dude was clapping for it, and I said clap it up and fucking nerd, he was like...

• 16:52Speaker 01

  It's awesome.

• 16:57Speaker 01

  I don't know.

• 16:59Speaker 01

  I don't know. I'm so grateful. I was born in the Soviet Union. Both of my grandfathers spent 10 years in jail for being Jewish. As somebody who aspires to be one of the great brander and marketers of his generation, I refuse for hate and horseshit and negativity to out-market me. I will sit here today, I will sit here on the slides, on every one of those platforms when they put it up, I hope they do, follow me back there, you told me you would, thank you very much, on stage, on those platforms, every day, 24/7, 365,

• 17:39Speaker 01

  I will remind you that life is phenomenal. That nobody gives a shit. So, the government or your mommy's not gonna help you. You've gotta do it, own your shit, but it's never been better. We've got a bigger chance than ever. We can do our thing. And so, I flew from London, I just flew in, I barely fucking made it to this talk. All the fucking guards here are fucking gangsters. Right? Fuck those guards!

• 18:08Speaker 01

  I barely made it here, and, I don't know, I've got some other talk now for 45 minutes about marketing on another stage, and then I'm flying home. And the only reason I wanted to be here, the only reason I wanted to be in Lisbon for four hours today, is because I knew there was a lot of you, I knew there was a lot of youngsters, and we are choosing what to listen to on social media now. So we're going into what we want to hear, and a lot of people need to hear one of two things today, which is, this is the greatest era to ever be alive and be an entrepreneur or executive if you want it, and stop complaining and dwelling, 'cause nobody gives a fuck. Thank you!

• 19:01Speaker 01

  Hey everybody, if you enjoyed this podcast, please go back and look at the prior episodes, they're loaded. I appreciate your attention, and thanks for being part of the show.

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• 20:10Speaker 01

  Journey. See you later.