Netflix Roast Reaction & Hantavirus is Coming | Flagrant #704

YERRR – the boys dive into roast battle chaos, scam stories, and why Cocomelon is destroying children. – Kevin Hart roast highlights & Tony and Shane going crazy – Trump UFO files, Epstein conspiracies & Chinese spies in Cali – Knicks delusion, subway madness & Strickland vs Khamzat All that and more on this week’s episode of FLAGRANT. INDULGE. 0:00 Roasts are BRUTAL 00:38 Travelling with kids + Cocomelon = Fent 5:21 5 hour flight with 2 kids + “If you insist” 9:48 Alexx got scammed + No rules bareknuckle 13:00 Tough getting got + Subway pole dancing 14:56 NY Immunity + Keep it OPEN 18:05 Wife’s tits for the streets + Foot lovers 21:55 Non-sandal wearers + Hotspots 24:03 Kevin Hart Roast + Primed for harsh jokes 29:11 Great jokes, Chappelle joke + Tony and Shane killed it 31:33 Lizzo was GREAT + Process for roast jokes* 35:10 Pete did well, Ye was there + Tony’s jokes 36:56 Katt Williams beef with Kevin Hart 41:16 The Rock + Andrew having FOMO 43:59 Next roast target, Stakes + Tom Brady 47:02 Too good to be true for Knicks? + Mark Grandma 1:03:12 Chinese Cali Spy + Eileen Gu definitely listens*** 1:12:47 Trump in China, loyalty + Stop caping for Trump 1:16:47 Arcadia, CA, Railroads + Jet Li come on pod 1:18:31 Stay on the boat + YTs love watching 1:22:13 Trump UFO files desperation + Bob Lazar 1:24:08 Epstein “suicide” note + Only 1 conviction 1:30:42 Strickland v Khamzat was incredible 1:37:28 Closing thoughts + Every other year This episode is sponsored by Kalshi. This episode is sponsored by Sesh. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:01Speaker 00

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• 0:29Speaker 01

  What's up everybody and welcome to Flagrant, your boy Schultz, Alex Media, Mark Gagnon, Miles Media in the building. How are you guys?

• 0:40Mark Gagnon?

  These roasts are getting brutal, bro. I'm getting soft.

• 0:47Mark Gagnon?

  I'm getting soft.

• 0:48Speaker 01

  Somebody jumped, I was like, ouch. Get off the internet, bro. Get off the internet, Al. The internet will have you making, have you feeling that things are worse than they are.

• 0:57Mark Gagnon?

  Bruh. When they talked about, well, we get to get into it later. But fuck, it was, you ain't feel none of the jokes were a little rough?

• 1:06Speaker 01

  We'll get into it, we'll get into it, man. We flew back from California a couple of days with both kids.

• 1:12Mark Gagnon?

  Oh, nice.

• 1:15Speaker 01

  I don't know how Epstein did it, man. I'll be honest with you. Traveling with kids is so fucking brutal, bro. He had to have a different plane, right? Like, there's no way you taking one of your plane.

• 1:28Mark Gagnon?

  Nah, those kids were Delta.

• 1:29Speaker 01

  They had to.

• 1:31Mark Gagnon?

  Put them commercial.

• 1:31Speaker 01

  They had to. It is, it is crazy that they haven't devised a system, a place to put the kids.

• 1:37Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah.

• 1:37Speaker 01

  Like, cause they did it with the animals. Right? Like, I'm not saying, and I'm very grateful for my kids, don't get me wrong here.

• 1:44Mark Gagnon?

  Of course, of course.

• 1:45Speaker 01

  Five hours on the plane.

• 1:48Mark Gagnon?

  But you see, Epstein died, spirits no longer here.

• 1:51Speaker 01

  Oh. At least with Spirit, they get to watch violence. You know, like, cause my kid's not on a screen, but he could watch two baby moms beat the shit out of each other. But like, we were, we were just sitting there. My wife's just like, we're not doing any screens. And I was like, what?

• 2:05Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah.

• 2:06Speaker 01

  And she's like, yeah, we're not doing any screens. And my wife is in the seat, uh, in front of us and I'm behind with Shiloh.

• 2:12Mark Gagnon?

  That's kinda fucked up of her, yo.

• 2:13Speaker 01

  No, but she's breastfeeding the baby and everything like that. And I'm back and like, I tried to do no screens and like, I threw on, I threw on that cocoa melons, bro.

• 2:24Mark Gagnon?

  On your screen?

• 2:25Speaker 01

  So on my screen, I put the cocoa melons. I didn't even have my volume on. I don't think I blinked for 30 minutes straight. That shit should be illegal. That's terrorism.

• 2:37Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 2:37Speaker 01

  Bro, it's so many flashing lights. And I'm literally like glued. My daughter is glued to the screen. My daughter's getting jump scared. Like, there's so much stimulus. My daughter keeps going like this, like, she goes, she goes, she goes, huh! And then she'll look at me and she's like,

• 2:53Speaker 01

  And this is her first time. Imagine your first time trying any drug is fentanyl.

• 2:59Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah.

• 3:00Speaker 01

  Or heroin. There was no gateway, no screen to cocoa melon.

• 3:05Mark Gagnon?

  Yep.

• 3:05Speaker 01

  I think we gotta show cocoa melon.

• 3:07Mark Gagnon?

  So wonderful. So on Mother's Day, the one rule your wife asked you not to do, you broke it.

• 3:11Speaker 01

  And, and,

• 3:12Mark Gagnon?

  On Mother's Day.

• 3:14Speaker 01

  No, no, I broke it. I broke the fuck out.

• 3:15Speaker 03

  No, because they weren't watching it. You were watching it and they chose the Skybox.

• 3:19Speaker 01

  I put on Shiloh's.

• 3:22Mark Gagnon?

  They both started watching it again.

• 3:24Speaker 01

  I put on Shiloh's, thinking I was gonna scroll my phone and talk to y'all. Shit, I didn't even open my phone. I was so locked into cocoa melons. Dude, there's a moment.

• 3:33Mark Gagnon?

  Oh, that is, yeah, it is.

• 3:35Speaker 01

  Oh, it's non-stop. And this is just the intro. You already locked in.

• 3:38Speaker 03

  And this is no volume, so that way it's, it feels like how you guys were watching it.

• 3:42Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 3:42Speaker 03

  Also, for the record, guess how many views this has? Random guess.

• 3:46Mark Gagnon?

  What, a billion?

• 3:48Speaker 03

  Eight billion.

• 3:50Mark Gagnon?

  What?

• 3:51Speaker 03

  Eight billion views. This has more views than people on the plane.

• 3:55Mark Gagnon?

  What?

• 3:56Speaker 01

  Yeah, Al, you get addicted to it. You gotta understand, my daughter's never seen an iPad, never seen a screen. And then I put on the most-

• 4:05Speaker 03

  Fenton all the musicals.

• 4:06Speaker 01

  Yes, son!

• 4:09Speaker 01

  That's crazy.

• 4:10Speaker 03

  You should've seen, yo. The flight attendant came around, she was like, "Oh!"

• 4:15Speaker 01

  At first, I had no headphones on for her. I was like, "We're just gonna watch the screen," "'cause I thought that might be too stimulating." I put the headphones on, and no bullshit, the second I put the headphones on, she watched, and I'm watching her, and I just see her slowly smile. Like this slow ear-to-ear Cheshire Cat smile creeps across her face. And I'm watching my kid become addicted to something in real time.

• 4:38Speaker 03

  Yep, yep.

• 4:39Speaker 01

  Woo!

• 4:40Speaker 03

  Yeah, dude.

• 4:41Mark Gagnon?

  You didn't feel bad about that?

• 4:42Speaker 01

  Feel bad?

• 4:45Speaker 01

  I could be a dad now. You just need Cocomelon. All these people complaining about like, uh, how hard it is to raise kids when you got screens? I don't wanna hear none of that no more, bro. I tried to put on the first episode of Sesame Street. Emma downloaded it onto the iPad.

• 5:00Speaker 03

  That's good.

• 5:00Speaker 01

  The first ever episode of Sesame Street.

• 5:03Speaker 03

  It's probably trash.

• 5:04Speaker 01

  The way Shiloh couldn't give a fuck after watching Cocomelon. It was like smoking a cigarette after you inject heroin straight into your fucking mouth. It, it, the, zero.

• 5:14Speaker 03

  Yep.

• 5:15Speaker 01

  Didn't even understand it logically. Like, she was like, "I see it in the garbage." Like, didn't like, there was no... She was like, "Why is this entertaining or fun?"

• 5:22Speaker 03

  Yep.

• 5:23Speaker 01

  And this transformed television. This one show transformed television.

• 5:28Speaker 03

  Yep. I mean, you've seen little kids react to Cocomelon, right? You've seen the videos?

• 5:31Speaker 01

  No.

• 5:32Speaker 03

  I'm trying to find one. There's videos of like, little kids hearing the theme song.

• 5:35Speaker 01

  Uh huh.

• 5:35Speaker 03

  And they go crazy. Look at this. Little kid's sleeping.

• 5:41Speaker 01

  Oh!

• 5:41Speaker 03

  No!

• 5:42Speaker 01

  Give me that show! Give me that!

• 5:43Mark Gagnon?

  Nah, this show is bad, bro. You can't do it.

• 5:45Speaker 03

  Wow.

• 5:46Mark Gagnon?

  You can't do it.

• 5:47Speaker 03

  They get so fired up.

• 5:48Speaker 01

  But you also can't-

• 5:49Mark Gagnon?

  Eight billion is crazy.

• 5:51Speaker 01

  You also can't fly for five hours with two kids. You can't do that.

• 5:55Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah.

• 5:56Speaker 01

  That's, that's an impossible task. I don't know how people did that.

• 5:59Mark Gagnon?

  The fact that she asked you to do that is, that was mean. That's mean to everybody else on the plane.

• 6:03Speaker 01

  No. Like, come on! Here's the other thing, like, I didn't even think about no one else on the plane. Like, they didn't even enter my brain. All that's like, it didn't like, oh, it could be uncomfortable for them. I don't care. Is that mean? Is that selfish?

• 6:19Speaker 03

  Yes. Nah, you get locked in, you get locked in.

• 6:21Speaker 01

  I think you've just become so.

• 6:22Speaker 03

  Focused.

• 6:23Speaker 01

  Yeah, micro focused on just like making sure your kid's okay.

• 6:26Speaker 03

  I don't want to snitch on you, but he did something so funny. We were trying to figure out routing for flights because we were like in Denver. He was like, maybe I go back to New York, then I go to LA. And I was like, well, you know, if you go to New York, we can get some stuff done. Then you go to LA. And he was like, yeah, but I could go straight to LA. And I was like, yeah, it's just time away from the family though. And he goes, yeah, but it's a flight without the kid.

• 6:45Speaker 01

  I was like, bro.

• 6:48Speaker 03

  He's scheduling his geographical travel to not fly with you.

• 6:54Speaker 01

  I ain't shit.

• 6:54Speaker 03

  Can I tell you something?

• 6:56Speaker 01

  Emma brought it up to me. She goes, she goes, uh, why don't you just go right from Denver to LA? And then we'll just come to Santa Barbara earlier because it was her dad's 80th birthday.

• 7:05Speaker 03

  He never said yes faster.

• 7:07Speaker 01

  No, I was about to and I had to be like, I had to stop it because I couldn't let her know.

• 7:13Speaker 03

  Yeah, she was testing him.

• 7:13Speaker 01

  How excited I was about to go. And I was like, I don't know if that makes sense. Like I should probably just fly back and then we all go back. And she's like, it doesn't even make any sense. I would just go straight to LA. You could do your meetings or whatever. And I was like, all right, man, I guess.

• 7:27Speaker 03

  Fine.

• 7:28Speaker 01

  If you insist, if you insist, I'll avoid that five hours.

• 7:32Speaker 03

  I'm going to be in the Delta One lounge with who though? You know, who will I be with? I'll be totally alone.

• 7:37Speaker 01

  No wonder you drove to the airport with us because you flew back. That she had to do that flight all by herself.

• 7:45Speaker 01

  I was like, yo, why are you coming with us to pick her up from the airport? Like, if she flew alone, she can take an Uber.

• 7:51Speaker 03

  It's not even like he had a car. He got dropped off at the airport on his feet, like GTA. He was just walking.

• 7:57Speaker 01

  Grabbing all the bags quick, throwing them in the back of the car. I was doing everything I possibly could, man. We got into the car, both kids asleep immediately. I was like, yo, this was hard for y'all to travel with the kids. There's so difficult about this.

• 8:08Speaker 03

  It is my least favorite part of parenting. I truly love being a dad, except travel.

• 8:13Speaker 01

  You need, you need another vacation once you land. Like you, you land from vacation with the kids and any relaxation that you got for the week away.

• 8:23Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 8:24Speaker 01

  Is evaporated on that flight because there's nothing on the flight.

• 8:28Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 8:28Speaker 01

  My daughter grabbed the scoop of ice cream with her whole hands. You know how they bring the scuba ice cream? I was like, she want some ice cream? She's like, yes. I was like, hold on, I'm just gonna get the spoon. I went to unwrap the spoon that's in the napkin. She just went.

• 8:46Speaker 01

  Chocolate sauce everywhere. Fucking whipped cream everywhere.

• 8:50Speaker 03

  She's like, go, go now.

• 8:55Mark Gagnon?

  He turned to it savage, bro.

• 8:57Speaker 03

  I don't even believe those stories. People are like, oh, like the travelers went west and like five of their kids died.

• 9:02Speaker 01

  No, no, no, they killed them.

• 9:03Speaker 03

  They killed the kids.

• 9:03Speaker 01

  They killed the kids.

• 9:04Speaker 03

  Hundred percent. Johnny got rickets back in Oregon.

• 9:07Speaker 01

  Typhoid fever, whatever it is. You left that motherfucker.

• 9:10Speaker 03

  Toss him off the wagon, dude.

• 9:11Speaker 01

  Because they didn't have iPads.

• 9:12Speaker 03

  Think about that. You had to travel from like, what, Denver to Oregon with that iPad?

• 9:17Speaker 01

  There are, there are people called travelers. They're gypsies. And their choice in life is to only travel with the kids.

• 9:26Speaker 03

  And what do they do with their kids? Send them around to go do scams in Paris.

• 9:30Speaker 01

  Yep.

• 9:30Speaker 03

  And they drug them.

• 9:31Speaker 01

  I think that's why they drug them. That's the only way to travel with the kids.

• 9:37Mark Gagnon?

  Makes so much sense now.

• 9:38Speaker 01

  Son, there is no, I used to feel, I used to think that tho- those people were evil with the drug kids on the street.

• 9:45Speaker 03

  They are evil.

• 9:46Speaker 01

  They trying to get by. They trying to get by. They're travelers. They're traveling every day. They live in a Winnebago. Their home is their fucking car.

• 9:54Speaker 03

  Good point.

• 9:54Mark Gagnon?

  They evil. They got me for 500 one time.

• 9:57Speaker 03

  No, 500?

• 9:58Speaker 01

  500 what? You was walking around with 500 dollars?

• 10:02Mark Gagnon?

  No, I went to the, I don't want to tell the story.

• 10:04Speaker 03

  No, you don't even have to tell it. Which also the gypsy probably listens to.

• 10:08Mark Gagnon?

  I kept this with the duck for like four years.

• 10:10Speaker 01

  Tell me, tell me, tell me.

• 10:12Speaker 03

  Shout out to the Roma, bro. I love the Roma. After they fucked over.

• 10:16Mark Gagnon?

  Tell me a story. All right, so I'm traveling to Philly. I'm at a.

• 10:20Speaker 01

  You got caught by an American gypsy, you dumb motherfucker.

• 10:24Speaker 03

  They send their beauty here.

• 10:26Speaker 01

  We don't got gypsies here. I never.

• 10:29Mark Gagnon?

  Met a gypsy in my life.

• 10:30Speaker 01

  So what did you think it was? You're a traveled dude. You've been around the world.

• 10:33Mark Gagnon?

  They came, dude came to me, he's like, yo, I'm, I'm charging. And so he comes over to me, he's like, yo, we, uh, we ran out of gas. We have to go on this long trip. We're seeing family. The kids are like sick in the car. He brings me over, the kids look sick in the car. And I'm like, yo, what do you need, bro? He's like, yo, don't worry, I'm gonna pay you back, I promise. He starts taking off his jewelry and shit like that. You could hold this, you get the money.

• 10:59Speaker 03

  Yup.

• 10:59Mark Gagnon?

  Bro, five hundred dollars later.

• 11:01Speaker 03

  I'm a guy.

• 11:02Mark Gagnon?

  And I drove away with a fake Rolex.

• 11:04Speaker 03

  I'm a guy. Well, you kept the watch? You kept the watch?

• 11:07Mark Gagnon?

  Fuck on it, I gave my money back. But yeah, they got me. I never met a gypsy before in my life. And usually our homeless, they never use kids.

• 11:14Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 11:15Mark Gagnon?

  So that was my first time.

• 11:17Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 11:17Mark Gagnon?

  And I felt bad for my kids.

• 11:18Speaker 03

  The fact you kept the watch makes me feel no sympathy for you at all.

• 11:21Mark Gagnon?

  He was, he was insisting.

• 11:23Speaker 01

  That's the scam.

• 11:24Mark Gagnon?

  He was insisting.

• 11:25Speaker 03

  A guy needed help and you were like, I'll help you.

• 11:27Speaker 01

  But son, do you know how gypsies are known for bare knuckle fighting? Did you guys know that this is part of like their history and lore, the Irish gypsies?

• 11:34Speaker 03

  But I know this is like, like the gypsy king, like is part of this or no?

• 11:36Speaker 01

  Of course, yeah, a lot of these fighters come from that lineage. But like the actual ones, there's this, this documentary called Knuckle. Where it goes into like what the, the, the actual street fights were about. And there's like rules to this shit. There's like a dirty one you could have where everything goes eye gouging, biting. I watched a fight where a dude bit the dude's nose off. Tip of his nose, bit that shit right off. There was a dude that said, there was a dude that said, I'm fuck, I wish I knew his name. He goes, after I bite someone's flesh off, I don't spit it out. Cause then he could sew it back on.

• 12:10Mark Gagnon?

  Damn.

• 12:11Speaker 01

  I swallow it.

• 12:12Mark Gagnon?

  You.

• 12:12Speaker 01

  Uh. So he remembers the fight he had with me. Anyway.

• 12:17Speaker 03

  This is. What year is this roughly?

• 12:19Speaker 01

  Uh, I don't know, look up the documentary Knuckle. That I think it just came out recently, but it looks fucking amazing. I was watching like a million Instagram clips about it. Oh my God, it's so brutal.

• 12:29Mark Gagnon?

  This, this one right here, right?

• 12:30Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 12:31Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah.

• 12:32Speaker 01

  And it's all literally, it's Hatfields and McCoys, like it's all familial. What are they called? What is that called?

• 12:39Mark Gagnon?

  Like blood feuds?

• 12:40Speaker 01

  Yes, uh, I, I wouldn't say blood feud where you have to like kill somebody. They actually squash something in the ring. So it's like, if you guys have beef, you fight it out and then that's where it is. Allegedly.

• 12:50Mark Gagnon?

  Like a duel or some shit like.

• 12:52Speaker 01

  Yeah, I actually think that like Tyson Fury's dad got locked up for years because of something that happened in one of these fights. Cause Tyson Fury's dad was a, like, you know, gypsy bare knuckle guy. Anyway, point I'm trying to say is they're so angry because they're traveling with kids. Like, this is why these guys gotta fight is because their life is traveling with kids and they have like seven kids.

• 13:16Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah.

• 13:16Speaker 01

  In one Winnebago.

• 13:18Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah.

• 13:18Speaker 01

  You gotta get that out. You gotta get it out the system.

• 13:22Mark Gagnon?

  Ah, I'm so mad.

• 13:23Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 13:24Mark Gagnon?

  I reminded myself of that story and I'm still pissed the fuck off.

• 13:27Speaker 01

  Shut up. It's okay. It is tough when we get got as New Yorkers because we're used to scams.

• 13:34Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah.

• 13:34Speaker 01

  Yeah. Like every moment you leave your house is a scam.

• 13:37Mark Gagnon?

  They hit me with the new one.

• 13:39Speaker 01

  That was different. We're not used to that.

• 13:41Mark Gagnon?

  Yes. And the kids look sick in the back.

• 13:43Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 13:44Speaker 03

  I feel like American scams are always like business oriented. You know what I mean? It's like, hey, like I just need a dollar for this thing. Like I'm trying to start something like, it's always like vaguely entrepreneurial. Whereas over there, like gypsies would just be like, you know, my, my family's dying.

• 13:56Mark Gagnon?

  So just say what you wanna say. What? Black kid dancing in the fucking subway. I know, I know, like he dancing around and shit entrepreneurial.

• 14:03Speaker 03

  That's not a scam, bro.

• 14:04Mark Gagnon?

  Entrepreneurial, like, yo, I'm doing this for my basketball team.

• 14:08Speaker 01

  Yeah, I respect that.

• 14:09Speaker 03

  That's a business, bro.

• 14:10Speaker 01

  I respect the basketball team. But I respect that more than a pole dancer. There was these, something happened when New York got gay. It don't matter how nice you are pole dancing, like why we give them respect to that? These guys are pole dancing on the subway.

• 14:23Mark Gagnon?

  Flips and shit. Come on, you gotta get one.

• 14:25Speaker 01

  What you think these hoes are doing? The best hoes are doing flips. So how do they not pause that?

• 14:30Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 14:30Speaker 01

  How do they not pause that?

• 14:32Mark Gagnon?

  They not taking their clothes off.

• 14:33Speaker 01

  Say again?

• 14:33Mark Gagnon?

  They not taking their clothes off. That's the difference.

• 14:35Speaker 03

  They take their jackets off a lot. I held them one time. One time.

• 14:38Speaker 01

  They give you their hat.

• 14:41Speaker 01

  Take your hat back.

• 14:42Speaker 03

  My first day in New York, I'm on the train with my suitcase and one of the guys is dancing. And he goes, hey, man, can I get some water? And I'm holding a water bottle. I was like, uh, sure. And he takes it, puts his lips on it, closes it, gives it back to me and then leaves. And I was just like, damn.

• 14:57Speaker 01

  And that guy's been holding a pole on a subway all day. That's maybe one of the more German festive human beings.

• 15:04Speaker 03

  Yeah, and I felt like an asshole.

• 15:07Speaker 01

  Why?

• 15:09Speaker 03

  He's on public transit.

• 15:10Speaker 01

  He's on, he's, he's holding the pole.

• 15:13Mark Gagnon?

  I'm sure they PRL after.

• 15:15Speaker 01

  Let me just.

• 15:16Mark Gagnon?

  Come on. Yeah, I'll give them benefit of the doubt. This is coming from a guy who doesn't wash his hands after taking a shit.

• 15:21Speaker 01

  I don't wash my hands.

• 15:22Mark Gagnon?

  You are the most German festive motherfucker.

• 15:24Speaker 03

  But he doesn't go on the subway.

• 15:25Speaker 01

  I rode, I rode the subway my whole life. That's why I didn't get COVID like you seven times.

• 15:28Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 15:30Speaker 01

  New Yorkers didn't get COVID.

• 15:31Mark Gagnon?

  You do got a weak ass.

• 15:34Speaker 03

  I got it twice. I got it twice.

• 15:35Speaker 01

  But you, cause you didn't build up your immunity. You were here not taking the subway. We've been taking the subway our entire lives.

• 15:40Speaker 03

  I actually do think there's something to this.

• 15:41Speaker 01

  There's nothing that hasn't been in my mouth.

• 15:45Speaker 01

  I've been on the subway my whole life, holding on to the pole.

• 15:48Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 15:48Speaker 01

  There.

• 15:49Speaker 03

  My little baby dropped his apple on the sidewalk, picked it up and ate it. And I was like, oh.

• 15:53Speaker 01

  That's okay, bro. That's okay. There's doodoo on that sidewalk.

• 15:57Speaker 03

  Yeah, I know.

• 15:58Speaker 01

  There's doodoo on it.

• 15:59Speaker 03

  But now he's gonna be built a little differently.

• 16:01Speaker 01

  Your kid will be built different a hundred percent. That's why I'm not worried about hand to virus or whatever.

• 16:05Speaker 03

  A little bit?

• 16:06Speaker 01

  I'm not.

• 16:07Speaker 03

  It spreads from rat poop.

• 16:08Speaker 01

  Say again?

• 16:09Speaker 03

  Rat poop is what.

• 16:10Mark Gagnon?

  Nah, but this new one is human to human. Yeah. So you got fucked.

• 16:14Speaker 03

  But now we're fucked both ways because we got rats and humans.

• 16:17Speaker 01

  Yeah, but it's some fucking like weird Dutchman that was using a rat as a vibrator or something. You know, they're into some freaky shit over there.

• 16:25Speaker 03

  Those rat fuckers.

• 16:26Speaker 01

  They're rat fuckers. A hundred percent rat fuckers.

• 16:28Mark Gagnon?

  I don't want people to die, but I wouldn't mind another pandemic.

• 16:31Speaker 01

  Yo. I really, I really would not, but we're not shutting it down again.

• 16:35Mark Gagnon?

  Nah, the shutdown was fun. That's the part I want.

• 16:39Speaker 03

  If it's not a shutdown and no one's dying, then how's it a pandemic? What do you want?

• 16:41Speaker 01

  We gotta keep it open and just people get sick. We gotta keep it open.

• 16:47Speaker 03

  I like his version better. I like everything says that and no one dies.

• 16:50Speaker 01

  We're not shutting it down. We can't shut it down again, bro. I got two kids.

• 16:55Speaker 01

  We need to get their energy out. I don't think we talked enough about the moms and dads that had kids in the house during the whole pandemic. God bless them. That's where you got eight billion views.

• 17:05Speaker 03

  Probably.

• 17:06Speaker 01

  Low key.

• 17:07Speaker 03

  Probably.

• 17:07Speaker 01

  Look at, look at where them views came from.

• 17:09Mark Gagnon?

  Who in a spike most, right?

• 17:10Speaker 01

  That spike happened 2021.

• 17:13Speaker 03

  Exactly.

• 17:13Speaker 01

  Also, all of our shows, very quickly, Salt Lake City, this coming weekend. Thank you guys so much. All shows are sold out. I love you, Salt Lake. Uh, June 5th and 6th, we're gonna be at Virginia Beach. June 5th and 6th. So go grab tickets for that. And then this summer, we're gonna be Great Outdoors Fest in Halifax, Nova Scotia, August 8th. TheAndrewSchultz.com for all those tickets. Thank you guys so much. Everybody came out to the Netflix, the Joke Fest that Jelly Roll and I did. That shit was crazy. The Greek Theater. That might be the most beautiful venue. I mean, obviously outside of my emotional connection to Madison Square Garden, but just pure carved out of a forest, like unbelievable, awesome. And thank you so much. Everybody came out and, uh, and saw us rock out. And that was a pretty

• 17:57Speaker 01

  fucking awesome night. So we really appreciate you. Mark.

• 18:00Speaker 03

  What's up, people? I'm gonna be coming to a bunch of cities at the end of the year. I'm going to Plano, Texas, Chandler, Arizona, Pasadena, California, San Diego, and Detroit. You can find that all at MarkGagnonLive.com. I can't wait to see you guys there. Thank you.

• 18:12Mark Gagnon?

  And guys, I have my tennis event this Saturday, May 16th. Just head over to TheAllLoveClub.com. TheAllLoveClub.com. Get your ticket there. There's like about five or 10 tickets left for this Saturday, but we have two more this summer. So yeah, if I don't see you this Saturday, I'll see you at the other dates. Peace.

• 18:35Speaker 04

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• 19:04Speaker 03

  Bro, do you do this thing when you travel on the plane?

• 19:06Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 19:06Speaker 03

  And your girl breastfeeds? Do you, do you screen? Do you pull a screen? That way people can't look?

• 19:12Speaker 01

  Can I be honest with you, man?

• 19:13Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 19:15Speaker 01

  Once you have kids, your wife's tits is for the streets, bro. They really are, dude. They really are. I know it sounds crazy, but it's like you're not as protective over them. I want all due respects to yourself.

• 19:30Speaker 01

  That's crazy. That's their decision. It's not ours. Their decision is for the streets. You just gave your wife tits up for the streets. I didn't. I didn't, but that baby gotta eat. That baby gotta eat, man. But y'all don't cover? The baby covers it.

• 19:43Speaker 03

  Sometimes you do a cover, sometimes like the shirt kinda hangs, and then sometimes I will, I will set a pic. And, and I'll try to like cover a little.

• 19:50Speaker 01

  Yeah, protect your tit. That's your tit.

• 19:52Speaker 03

  A little, and then she'll be like, what are you doing? And I'm like, well, yeah, just, you know, just in case. And she's like, it's fine.

• 19:57Speaker 01

  Nah, you gotta also just like, the baby pulls off and then he sucked the titty into an Aladdin shoe. Oh. And it's just like flat and curled at the ends.

• 20:10Speaker 01

  And then you dap them off. You go, yeah, boy, get that milk. Get that milk, Link.

• 20:16Speaker 03

  Bro, I heard a story of a girl that popped it out to feed her baby and then.

• 20:20Speaker 01

  Someone else sucked on it?

• 20:21Speaker 03

  No, no, no.

• 20:21Speaker 01

  I seen that on the subway. I seen that. A girl popped her titty out?

• 20:27Speaker 01

  Dude popped right off of the fucking pole and just started sucking on her titty.

• 20:30Speaker 03

  Nah, she got up to go to the bathroom, gave the baby to her husband, forgot to pull her shirt up.

• 20:34Speaker 01

  And just titty out.

• 20:35Speaker 03

  Walked through the whole thing.

• 20:36Speaker 01

  That's what I'm saying. They stopped being as protect. I remember I posted a carousel when it was a few days after Lincoln was born. Yeah, he was wild for that. I didn't even realize one of the pictures had my wife's titty out. And my wife don't even like being on the internet. And I was like, oh shit, I think the titty. And my wife was like, ah, it's fine. Wow.

• 20:57Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 20:57Speaker 01

  They don't care. It's a very different, like it stops becoming a, uh, like a sexualized part of the body. To y'all. That's a good point. But isn't that what's most important? Jerking off to fucking people, press people like that?

• 21:16Speaker 03

  I wasn't even in the show, man.

• 21:19Mark Gagnon?

  Stop bare knuckling.

• 21:20Speaker 01

  Yeah. Come on, son.

• 21:25Mark Gagnon?

  I bite off the flesh and I swallow it.

• 21:28Speaker 01

  No, there's a, uh, there's a thing where it's-

• 21:31Speaker 03

  It just becomes a tool. It becomes a tool for sustaining life.

• 21:34Speaker 01

  Exactly. Now, to you guys, you might still sexualize it. But there's, there's the thing. It's like, women didn't even know that we liked feet, all of us, every guy. Until like, some asshole made a big deal of it on the internet.

• 21:48Mark Gagnon?

  What, you?

• 21:50Speaker 01

  Not me.

• 21:50Speaker 03

  You're one of the foremost spokespeople.

• 21:52Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah, you are.

• 21:53Speaker 01

  For paddling feet?

• 21:55Mark Gagnon?

  I think, I think you're known more for a foot lover than paddle.

• 21:59Speaker 01

  Yo, but like, I should have never said nothing.

• 22:01Mark Gagnon?

  Foot lover, yo, foot lovers mad to just-

• 22:04Speaker 01

  No, but like, you got girls in the javanis, but they're curling their toes now, so we can't see it. You know what I mean? Stop burkaing your feet up. If you're wearing a javanis, you know what I mean? It's a luau. Or it's a luau, I don't know. That's a Brazilian thing, that shit. I thought it was white.

• 22:22Speaker 03

  No, luau's a white.

• 22:24Speaker 01

  But the javanis are Brazilian, aren't they?

• 22:26Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 22:27Speaker 01

  Anyway, my point is that like, we fuck up and we let the world know about our sexual proclivities. When it just was like another part, like, if you're into shins, nobody even knows.

• 22:37Speaker 03

  You're right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The more you talk about it, the more it hides.

• 22:40Speaker 01

  Exactly.

• 22:41Speaker 03

  It's like a cat. You gotta let it come to you.

• 22:44Mark Gagnon?

  That was a little-

• 22:45Speaker 03

  I think that makes sense. If you chase a cat, it runs away. You tell it about your feet, you know what I mean? So you gotta say nothing about the feet, keep it in the tuck, and then-

• 22:52Speaker 01

  Keep it in the tuck?

• 22:53Speaker 03

  This is what happens when you grow up in New York. This is a big issue, I think.

• 22:56Speaker 01

  Why?

• 22:57Speaker 03

  Because you, New York is not a sandal-wearing place. New Yorkers are not known for wearing sandals.

• 23:01Speaker 01

  Yo, you-

• 23:02Speaker 03

  Mostly if you don't wear sandals, then when you're walking on the street, like, people judge me for wearing sandals on a regular basis in the summertime.

• 23:08Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah, you're disgusting.

• 23:09Speaker 03

  But like, why is wearing sandals on the sidewalk disgusting?

• 23:11Speaker 01

  It's like, it's like-

• 23:12Mark Gagnon?

  You've seen New York streets? Like, it's too close to the garbage.

• 23:15Speaker 01

  No, no, you're making a good point. Because it's, so for me, it's like, seeing a foot is like a Muslim dude seeing hair.

• 23:21Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 23:22Speaker 01

  And then, like, he doesn't get to see it all the time.

• 23:24Speaker 03

  Exactly.

• 23:24Speaker 01

  And then he does, he's like, oh, that's super attractive.

• 23:27Speaker 03

  It's the thickest hair ever, yeah.

• 23:28Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 23:28Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 23:29Speaker 01

  That's a great point.

• 23:29Speaker 03

  It's your forbidden fruit.

• 23:30Speaker 01

  You should see, like, you ever seen an Eskimo look at a foot?

• 23:35Speaker 01

  Oh my god, bro.

• 23:37Speaker 03

  I'm gonna look this up.

• 23:38Speaker 01

  Oh my god. I think that's why they like narwhal, cuz it's similar texture. It's chewy.

• 23:47Speaker 01

  You gotta dip it in soy sauce or whatever.

• 23:50Speaker 03

  It's like a kid seeing cocoa melon, brother.

• 23:51Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 23:52Speaker 03

  They wake up. Now, I'm gonna look at foot fetish by geography. I bet you can find, you can find like a map of it.

• 23:59Speaker 01

  Yeah, if you come from a barefoot place, there's no way.

• 24:01Speaker 03

  Uh oh.

• 24:02Speaker 01

  What do we got?

• 24:02Speaker 03

  My whole theory's gone out the window.

• 24:04Speaker 01

  What do we got?

• 24:05Speaker 03

  States with the most foot fetishes.

• 24:07Speaker 01

  Yep. Okay.

• 24:08Speaker 03

  New York.

• 24:09Speaker 01

  All, Andrew.

• 24:10Speaker 03

  Chicago.

• 24:12Speaker 01

  But these are two, these are two like industrialized cities, so you're not gonna really see feet that much.

• 24:18Speaker 03

  Actually, maybe this goes to my theory. So you got New York and Chicago that you're never gonna see feet.

• 24:21Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 24:22Speaker 03

  Florida, Texas, Los Angeles.

• 24:26Speaker 03

  You're gonna see, I think, a lot of.

• 24:27Speaker 01

  I think in Texas, I don't think in Texas you do. I think those are booted.

• 24:31Speaker 03

  Yeah, those might be booted people. That's a good point.

• 24:33Speaker 01

  Florida is peculiar to me, but what I would say is that the majority of people in Florida have moved there from New York.

• 24:40Speaker 03

  That's a good point.

• 24:41Speaker 01

  Right? So it's like you're taking your fetish to a place where it's readily available.

• 24:46Speaker 03

  Same as LA.

• 24:47Speaker 01

  Same as LA.

• 24:48Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 24:49Speaker 01

  Also, everybody in LA is in their car. It's not really like a pedestrian place. So you're not really seeing people walk around.

• 24:56Speaker 03

  That's true.

• 24:57Mark Gagnon?

  That's true.

• 24:58Speaker 03

  Yeah, that's fair.

• 24:59Mark Gagnon?

  Stupid ass theory, but it's true.

• 25:00Speaker 01

  I mean, there might be something to it.

• 25:02Speaker 03

  All right. You wanna talk about this roast?

• 25:04Speaker 01

  Yes, let's talk about the roast. Al, you're sensitive? You're, you feel a little uncomfortable about it?

• 25:09Mark Gagnon?

  I think, I think it was a little harsh.

• 25:11Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 25:11Speaker 03

  Really?

• 25:12Speaker 01

  What was harsh for you?

• 25:15Mark Gagnon?

  Cheryl Underwood, the husband.

• 25:18Speaker 01

  Oh, God. So Cheryl Underwood is a, you know, legend comedian who's been around forever.

• 25:25Speaker 01

  And I guess her husband had committed suicide.

• 25:27Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah.

• 25:28Speaker 01

  And like, there was a lot of jokes going in.

• 25:30Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah.

• 25:31Speaker 03

  But I saw her talk about it in an interview. I think it was after. I think it came out like today. And she was like, that was her husband. She was in the military. And he was also in the military. She was getting deployed or something. This was like thirty years ago.

• 25:43Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 25:44Speaker 03

  And they were married, and this is like, the nineties, I think.

• 25:47Speaker 01

  Oh, okay.

• 25:48Speaker 03

  Something like that.

• 25:48Speaker 01

  All right, I changed it. I thought it was recent.

• 25:50Speaker 03

  I'm like, God.

• 25:50Speaker 01

  You thought it just happened?

• 25:51Speaker 03

  Yeah. And a bunch of them called her, like Shane called before, according to him, I think he said it in the roast.

• 25:56Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah, Shane said he did.

• 25:57Speaker 03

  Like, he reached out to her and was like, hey, is it cool if I say it? She was like, yeah, of course.

• 26:00Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah, but then what? She gonna be a pussy and be like, no, it bothers me. You know how.

• 26:05Speaker 01

  You're right. It is, it is a tough position to put her in.

• 26:08Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah.

• 26:09Speaker 03

  Yeah, I can, I can see her just being like, ah, I'd rather not. It's really delicate. Like, I'm still reeling from it. And then I think every comic would be like, all right, I get it.

• 26:15Speaker 01

  Yeah, I don't think anybody would, but there is also a part of you that's on the roast. You're like, all right, everything's free game.

• 26:20Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah.

• 26:21Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 26:21Mark Gagnon?

  And you don't want to be the one pussy on the roast that gives people like, oh, you can't say this?

• 26:25Speaker 03

  I guess. But in that regard, she was totally fine with it, according to this interview.

• 26:28Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah, but yeah, thirty years, that's nothing.

• 26:33Speaker 03

  I was in no middle ground at all.

• 26:37Speaker 03

  He's like, bro, this went too far.

• 26:38Speaker 01

  I was like, if one of my college hoes died right now.

• 26:43Speaker 01

  What else has hurt you? What else has hurt you?

• 26:45Mark Gagnon?

  No, that was the main one, but I feel like this one was just, and I know that's the nature of a roast. It's just like, hey, say the most brutal thing you could think of, and maybe I'm just getting sold. I thought, I thought it was rough.

• 26:56Speaker 01

  But isn't that part of the?

• 26:57Mark Gagnon?

  I love it.

• 26:58Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 26:58Mark Gagnon?

  But if that comedy flies and everybody's okay with that, why can't that comedy just be the standard?

• 27:04Speaker 01

  Mark had a great point about this.

• 27:07Speaker 03

  So like, first off, I love roasts. I genuinely love them. Like, I love all the Comedy Central roasts. I love the Netflix roasts. Like, I just enjoy, like, just rapid fire, clever jokes. They're biting, there's steaks, it's live. It's like, the whole thing is perfect.

• 27:20Speaker 01

  I ain't got with black people more in New York.

• 27:22Mark Gagnon?

  You see that all the time.

• 27:24Speaker 03

  It's just awesome. I just, it's like the best. But I do think, like, for the general public, having an environment for, like, super dark, roasty, like, boring. Underlying aggressive comedy is nice when it exists within a specific forum.

• 27:38Speaker 01

  Cause you're primed for it.

• 27:39Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 27:40Speaker 01

  You're basically telling everybody, hey, the worst jokes possible are gonna be said, so don't be surprised when they're said.

• 27:45Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 27:46Speaker 01

  And prepare yourself for this. Like if you click play, know that's what you're gonna see.

• 27:50Speaker 03

  Yeah. Like if I'm at work in my office job at 8am and someone says one of these jokes to me, I would even be like, whoa, that's a little much for work. You know what I mean? If I meet someone for the first time.

• 27:59Speaker 01

  Cause you're not primed for, this is gonna be the craziest shit. You're primed for, this is corporate America and we're all gonna like, you know, put on a corporate face and a corporate accent and do our thing.

• 28:07Mark Gagnon?

  And that's funny. Me, I like to ruffle feathers. I'm like, oh, it's much better to say it in the place where it's unexpected.

• 28:12Speaker 03

  Well, I would enjoy that more. But I also recognize that there's, I wouldn't say that joke in that environment. You know what I mean? If I'm meeting like my wife's parents for the first time, I wouldn't say some of these jokes. If I'm hanging with my buddies, I might say some of them more, you know what I mean? If I'm at a comedy club, I might say most of them. And then when you're at a roast, it is the exact environment to say all of the worst possible stuff. And that is the point of it. It's like, you don't need, like, like, you shouldn't expect violence in everyday society. But at the UFC, you need violence. Like it require, it necessitates.

• 28:41Speaker 01

  They're preparing you. They're like, yo, someone's gonna elbow someone in the face when they're passed out on the ground.

• 28:46Speaker 03

  Yeah. And there's probably, there could be blood and people might pass out, like they might get knocked out cold.

• 28:51Speaker 01

  No, that doesn't mean that some people don't watch UFC and be like, this is too brutal for me.

• 28:54Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 28:55Speaker 01

  Just like I'm sore, you know, for roasts, it's the same thing. But at least it's like, there's a framework put in place and an expectation for you going into it. And I think sometimes when the clips hit the internet, someone's scrolling and they have not subscribed to a roast. Right? So then they're, they're looking at cat videos or whatever, and then this crazy joke comes out and they're like, yo, I didn't sign up for this. I signed up for Mark Zuckerberg's, you know, Instagram.

• 29:20Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 29:20Speaker 01

  So then they're caught off guard. But I, I find it hard to believe that people that were like, I'm pressing play on this roast and I know it's gonna be absolutely savage. I find it hard to believe that those people would be like, super offended.

• 29:34Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah, I don't, I don't think anything, or I didn't hear anything that was like, offensive. I just was like, oof, they really went there, they went there.

• 29:41Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 29:42Mark Gagnon?

  And I like that shit.

• 29:43Speaker 01

  Oh, there were some great jokes.

• 29:44Speaker 03

  I also think there's a difference with like, something, I think you can be sensitive to something and still think it's funny.

• 29:49Mark Gagnon?

  Yes.

• 29:50Speaker 03

  You know what I mean? Like, I'll hear jokes even just like, at a club or whatever, where I'm like, oof, like, that's like, it's something for me personally, where I'm like, oh, that's a little close, but I still think it's so funny that I'm like, I don't care. Because the funniness outweighs the sensitivity, and the more sensitive something is, the funnier something has to be. Which is why I like jokes that push the line of sensitivity.

• 30:07Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah.

• 30:07Speaker 03

  Because it necessitates that it's that much funnier.

• 30:10Speaker 01

  Yeah, I, I saw, I saw a bunch of clips and I watched some of it, and I just thought the jokes were great. And it was like, everybody was going in, you know, it was gloves off. I think the only time I'm like, oh shit, is when, uh, like, anybody's kids get brought up. And maybe it's because I'm a dad, or whatever it is, or you just think about the kids, it's like, you know, they're just like, young and kind of defenseless. And it's not the person's life, it's somebody else's life. Like, even with the Tom Brady roast, it's like, I ain't saying shit about his kids, bro, like, I don't.

• 30:43Speaker 03

  Because they didn't sign up to be in this environment.

• 30:45Speaker 01

  Exactly. But neither did his ex-wife, and we definitely made jokes about her ex. You know?

• 30:50Speaker 03

  Public figure.

• 30:52Speaker 01

  Public figure, that's also the other rule. It's like, if your, if your spouse is a public figure, then, you know, she's free game. You've, you know.

• 30:59Mark Gagnon?

  Who was it who called, uh, Kevin's wife a ladyboy?

• 31:04Speaker 01

  Not Dave's wife.

• 31:05Mark Gagnon?

  Oh, Dave.

• 31:06Speaker 01

  Naim Lin, Naim Lin is hilarious comedian, more like, one of Kev's boys, he's in the Plastic Cup Boys, but also like, hilarious stand-up.

• 31:12Mark Gagnon?

  He killed it.

• 31:13Speaker 01

  He was fantastic.

• 31:15Mark Gagnon?

  Yo, shout out to you, brother.

• 31:17Speaker 01

  Naim was fantastic. Yeah, he's like, uh, what'd he say about Dave? He's like, uh.

• 31:22Speaker 03

  Oh, he went in.

• 31:23Speaker 01

  He said, I don't know why he did. He said, uh, Dave wasn't even there. He said, uh, Kevin hates you. He goes, uh, Kevin hates you more than the transgender community hates you. And then he goes, uh, I don't know why you hate transgender so much when your wife is a Filipino ladyboy.

• 31:41Mark Gagnon?

  Oh.

• 31:42Speaker 01

  Even Shane went up like, that was interesting. I'm sure he'll be totally okay with that.

• 31:46Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah.

• 31:47Speaker 03

  Went hard. But I thought, I thought all the comics did great. Tony killed.

• 31:50Mark Gagnon?

  Tony crushed, bro.

• 31:51Speaker 03

  Shane killed.

• 31:52Speaker 01

  Shane did great.

• 31:53Speaker 03

  Uh, I mean, I thought Cheryl Underwood did great.

• 31:56Speaker 01

  Yo, Shane bringing Chelsea up as he got himself sucked. He goes, uh, she, she was, uh, she was at a dinner with Epstein. It wasn't even a big dinner, just a few people there, like Prince Andrew and, uh, Woody Allen.

• 32:11Speaker 03

  You could look it up. There's articles.

• 32:12Speaker 01

  Yeah, there's articles. Anyway, give it up for Chelsea.

• 32:19Speaker 01

  No joke, it's just a fact about her life.

• 32:22Speaker 03

  Unreal. Yeah. She's a Zionist. Not that it's good or bad.

• 32:25Speaker 01

  Yeah. Speaking of dead babies.

• 32:27Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah. That was, that was great. That was great. But yeah, Jeff did great. And then the person that impressed me the most that I, I was so charmed by was Lizzo.

• 32:36Speaker 01

  Oh, Lizzo was so good.

• 32:37Speaker 03

  Lizzo was fantastic.

• 32:38Speaker 01

  Cause she was having fun.

• 32:40Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 32:41Mark Gagnon?

  Oh, it's awesome.

• 32:42Speaker 01

  She just had fun. Like you could tell, like she was enjoying it, not just trying to do well.

• 32:48Speaker 03

  Hmm.

• 32:49Speaker 01

  And there's a version of like, I just want to crush. And then there's a version of like, this is silly and naughty and like, I'm in it.

• 32:55Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 32:56Speaker 01

  And, uh, that energy I think always wins.

• 32:59Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 33:00Speaker 01

  You know, like, so, yeah, yeah. Even if like you might bumble a line, it doesn't matter. Cause people are like, oh, they're having fun and they're stoked to be in this moment.

• 33:08Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 33:08Speaker 01

  And signing up to it, she knew she was gonna get cooked.

• 33:12Mark Gagnon?

  I didn't even see her there.

• 33:13Speaker 01

  She came out.

• 33:14Speaker 03

  Yeah. I don't know if she was announced. I think she was like a guest.

• 33:17Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 33:18Mark Gagnon?

  She did that on purpose.

• 33:20Speaker 01

  But then some people I think went after her.

• 33:23Mark Gagnon?

  Okay.

• 33:23Speaker 01

  So they still had jokes for her.

• 33:25Mark Gagnon?

  Got it. Got it. Got it. Okay. Yo, what's the process for the roast? Like, are all their jokes written by other people?

• 33:32Speaker 01

  No, you get like a, a group of guys that will write jokes.

• 33:36Mark Gagnon?

  Okay.

• 33:37Speaker 01

  So like the, the celebs usually have like a team of guys and they got like amazing fucking writers. They're like, Mike Lawrence is fantastic. Dan St. Germain, another guy and like, and then everybody kind of just has like a team of guys and you work with them and you put together the set. And essentially that's what it is.

• 33:53Mark Gagnon?

  Got it.

• 33:53Speaker 01

  And it's like its own skill. Like roast, roast jokes are, it's not like that doesn't translate to standup, but it is a very specific type of thing.

• 34:02Speaker 03

  Hmm.

• 34:03Speaker 01

  And, um, And yeah, these guys are fucking amazing.

• 34:07Speaker 03

  I also, I wonder if Netflix contracts writers just in general.

• 34:11Speaker 01

  Yeah, so like, like Mike Lawrence was probably like, maybe the, I'm assuming he was like the head writer. So he's there to make sure everybody has jokes and then he's also there to make sure that people's jokes aren't crossing over that much. Without telling other people.

• 34:26Speaker 03

  Right.

• 34:26Speaker 01

  So like, I remember when we were doing Brady, he came in the room and I was like, hey, just tell me what any other people have without telling me. Anybody else's jokes.

• 34:35Speaker 03

  Right, or I think you were even like, I'm gonna do this joke and he was like, oh yeah, no one's touching that.

• 34:38Speaker 01

  Exactly.

• 34:39Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 34:39Speaker 01

  Okay. So it's like, cause that's the other thing, it's like, there's only so many short black jokes you can make.

• 34:45Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 34:45Speaker 01

  About Kevin.

• 34:46Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 34:46Speaker 01

  So you gotta make sure each person's short black joke is different than the other.

• 34:51Speaker 03

  Right.

• 34:51Speaker 01

  There's only so many jokes about his movies sucking, so you gotta make sure they're different enough where the audience doesn't hear the same joke over and over again for. And that's the other reason why there's a dais. Right, it's like, not only do you need people to tell jokes, you need people that are punching bags as well.

• 35:05Speaker 03

  Ah, got it, got it.

• 35:06Speaker 01

  Right, cause it's just, if every person only talks about Kevin, two hours in, you're like, alright, we heard it all.

• 35:11Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, but that's what makes going last in the roast or later in the roast so stressful, because it's like.

• 35:16Speaker 01

  Everybody heard it.

• 35:17Speaker 03

  You're sitting there and then other jokes are getting picked off, you're kind of like crossing off stuff, like crossing stuff out, like alright, that joke got done, like this one kinda got done. And then you gotta like make a choice, like, alright, is this one close enough?

• 35:27Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah, but I figured the head writer is, they're picking those off before the thing.

• 35:32Speaker 01

  Yeah, but like, the topic has been broached, so by like an hour and a half in, it's like, alright, we get it, Kevin's short.

• 35:38Speaker 03

  Got it.

• 35:38Speaker 01

  And whatever, and like, like I remember there was a, there was a time in Brady where like, I noticed Dana in the audience. And like, I, I had a riff about him that I didn't have in like the set, but I was like, ooh, nobody's gonna hit him or maybe they won't hit him. Because he's like, an unannounced guest just in the crowd, but people are aware of him. And those things can, you know what I mean, it's like fresh meat, essentially. So being able to pull from those different things, I think is, is valuable.

• 36:08Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 36:09Speaker 01

  But there was some fucking bangers, dude, there was some really.

• 36:12Speaker 03

  Yeah, Pete Davidson did great.

• 36:14Speaker 01

  Yo, Pete did really good, man.

• 36:16Speaker 03

  He was good.

• 36:16Speaker 01

  Yeah, Pete did really good, and he, and also put it, think about Pete, like. He knows if he's sitting there, he's gonna relive his dad's death ten times.

• 36:25Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 36:26Speaker 01

  You know what I mean? Like you putting yourself in the line of fire. And so that was, that was cool to see.

• 36:31Speaker 03

  Also, I saw a little thing from TMZ. This is like, it's kind of like a nothing story, but like Kanye was apparently there.

• 36:37Speaker 01

  No.

• 36:38Speaker 03

  Yeah. So I saw a video of someone like, like recording Kanye from the corner and he doesn't really react, but like he's there for all the jokes, which is kind of wild.

• 36:45Speaker 01

  Get out of here.

• 36:47Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 36:47Speaker 05

  That was your point where, yeah, apparently it was in the crowd and that was to your point with like the Pete joke where Pete said to Tony, like, I've had a better gay Nazi. Like I've been in a beef with a better gay Nazi. I'm not afraid of you. I think that was because he knew Kanye.

• 37:01Speaker 01

  He knew Kanye was there. Oh, that's funny.

• 37:02Speaker 03

  Wow. Yeah.

• 37:04Speaker 01

  Yeah. Man, fuck, Tony had a bit where he said, uh, Chelsea Handler is aging like a vegetable in Lizzo's fridge.

• 37:13Speaker 03

  But one of my favorites from Tony was, uh, Regina Hall's here. She starred in a movie, uh, One Battle After Another, or as Lizzo calls it, Stairs.

• 37:25Speaker 01

  One of the coolest, a lot of good ones.

• 37:26Speaker 05

  One of the cool things that was happening at the Netflix's jokes, uh, fest was a lot of the comedians were trying their jokes out.

• 37:32Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 37:33Speaker 05

  During that week. So I didn't get to go to the roast and wasn't watching it live because on a plane, but I'd heard a lot of them and then rewatched it. And I was like, oh, some of these made it. Some of them got changed along the way.

• 37:42Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 37:43Speaker 05

  There's a really cool process if you got to go to that week before too.

• 37:45Speaker 01

  Yeah. Yeah. Like Tony was on, uh, me and Jelly's show and Tony tried some of the, uh, roast jokes out and like prep them.

• 37:53Speaker 03

  And then Big Jay was great.

• 37:54Speaker 01

  Oh yeah. Shout out Big Jay.

• 37:55Speaker 03

  And then it was cool to see Kat pull up.

• 37:57Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 37:58Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 37:59Speaker 01

  There's a lot of speculation on whether like the beef is actually squashed.

• 38:04Speaker 03

  What you think?

• 38:06Speaker 01

  I thought, I think if it is, it's really cool. And I think like Kev extending the olive branch is really cool. Kev also did a really funny thing because like everybody made fun of him for being a bad actor. Like they're like, your movies suck and you suck at acting. And then he squashes these with Kat. And then when he does his thing at the end, it's like, all of y'all said I was this horrible actor. Well, you believed me when I said that I squashed my beef with Kat. That was some of the best acting you've ever seen. It was like a fun.

• 38:33Mark Gagnon?

  That's good.

• 38:34Speaker 01

  Yeah. Fun setup, but like, yeah, cool for Kat to just show up.

• 38:38Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah.

• 38:39Speaker 01

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• 42:45Speaker 03

  How'd The Rock do? I didn't watch the set. It was fun. Like, he just is The Rock. Like, it wasn't so much like he had like a bunch of like super tight jokes. He's just, he just walks in and everyone's like, oh, The Rock.

• 42:56Speaker 01

  He's also good at... Performing in front of an arena of people.

• 43:00Speaker 03

  Exactly. Like he was like holding attention in the arena.

• 43:03Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 43:03Speaker 03

  And then was just going in about Kevin and his wife. Basically being like, call me. It was very funny.

• 43:11Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 43:12Speaker 03

  But I liked that. I just love roasts.

• 43:14Speaker 01

  No, they're great. They're great. And it is a great opportunity, like,

• 43:20Speaker 01

  it is a great opportunity to just see somebody celebrated and humbled.

• 43:24Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 43:25Speaker 01

  And I think it's easier for like humans to celebrate somebody while humbling them at the same time. You know, like you, if somebody gets a lot of success, like the maybe human instinct is just to start tearing them down.

• 43:36Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 43:36Speaker 01

  So in the process of celebrating you, we are going to tear you down. It's probably like why dudes give birthday punches to their friends. It's like, I can't just be nice to you all day. Let me beat the shit out of you and then I can be nice to you.

• 43:49Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 43:49Speaker 01

  So it's like, we're already doing this at like eight years old or whenever we start birthday punches.

• 43:53Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 43:54Mark Gagnon?

  But it seemed like there was some real animosity on that station. That, that was one thing. They weren't doing that great of acting.

• 44:02Speaker 01

  I don't think, I don't think Tony likes Chelsea Hammer that much. And Chelsea was like shaking when she was like, there's a difference between Judaism and Zionism, like to Shane.

• 44:12Speaker 03

  Yeah. Is there a little part of you that wishes you did it?

• 44:15Speaker 01

  I had some FOMO. I'll be honest with you. I did have a little bit of FOMO.

• 44:18Speaker 03

  Cause they asked you.

• 44:19Speaker 01

  I just, this is what I, the agents basically reached out and they're just like, you know, hey, we heard it's gonna happen. Like, are you down? And I had talked to like Netflix about some other whatever. And, um, and I just had to make a decision between like developing a new hour of material to go tour or doing the, doing the roast. Cause I know I wouldn't be able to do either. I'd be like, I'm just gonna lock myself in the fucking clubs and be working on my 10 minute thing.

• 44:43Speaker 03

  Yeah. It becomes the whole month.

• 44:46Speaker 01

  Yeah, or yeah, as long as, two months maybe. If you really wanna do it in like Excel.

• 44:51Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 44:51Speaker 01

  You know, but in retrospect, there's also versions like, all right, maybe I should've just done it and just had some fun jokes and just had.

• 44:57Speaker 03

  Yeah, you should've did it.

• 44:58Speaker 01

  I know. I had, I had a little FOMO, but I'm also glad that I focused on standup and I'm able to get back on the road and like that's. But yeah, that's it. When you see it, you're like, oh, man, that looks so much fun. Fucking idiot. I should have just fucking done it. Stupid.

• 45:12Speaker 03

  Well, it's nice to do it. It's the three months preparing where you're in fight camp.

• 45:15Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 45:16Speaker 03

  You know what I mean? Like putting everything else off, not traveling with your kids.

• 45:19Speaker 01

  Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I got to travel with my kids.

• 45:23Speaker 03

  You got the benefit of that, which is good.

• 45:25Speaker 01

  Yeah. But no, it was, I don't know. It was just cool to see.

• 45:28Speaker 03

  They need Tiger to do it. Tiger Woods gotta be the next one.

• 45:31Speaker 01

  Yeah, there was a.

• 45:32Mark Gagnon?

  He don't seem like he got a sense of humor.

• 45:34Speaker 01

  But that's even better.

• 45:36Speaker 03

  I like it when it's celebs, I think, I think a little more. Like, I like, I, that's what I liked about the Comedy Central ones is like, I enjoy seeing people kind of out of their element.

• 45:44Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 45:45Speaker 03

  Like when Bieber did it, like Charlie Sheen.

• 45:47Speaker 01

  Vulnerability of it.

• 45:48Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 45:49Speaker 01

  You know, like, a comedian is, is, not to say that this wasn't awesome, but they're a little bit better at maybe like taking jokes about themselves. Like Kevin might be one of the best ever at taking jokes.

• 45:59Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 46:00Speaker 01

  Like he'll tell you stories about going through it.

• 46:02Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 46:03Speaker 01

  At the cellar.

• 46:03Speaker 03

  I mean, stories of him and Patrice.

• 46:05Speaker 01

  Patrice used to throw the phone book at him while he was on stage.

• 46:09Speaker 01

  Yeah, he's like, read this. This is better than you have. So like, Kev is probably historically maybe one of the best ever. Rich Voss is another one who's like amazing at roasting, but he's a great person to get into a roast with.

• 46:24Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 46:24Speaker 01

  Like, he don't get sensitive. He gets like jazzed up by it.

• 46:27Speaker 03

  I mean, all those, all the like OG cellar guys.

• 46:29Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 46:30Speaker 03

  Bobby Kelly, Jim Norton.

• 46:31Speaker 01

  Like the literally my goats, like the people I would just look and watch at the back table and be like, this is Keith Robinson ledge. So, yeah, so that was, uh, but yeah, when you see a celebrity that's not used to getting teased.

• 46:45Speaker 03

  There's something about it. It kind of adds some stakes to it.

• 46:47Speaker 01

  You're like, oh shit, they're angry. Like when Tom Brady walked up to Jeff Ross and goes, don't talk about my fucking kids.

• 46:53Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 46:54Speaker 01

  At the roast. That was real.

• 46:57Speaker 03

  Oh, really?

• 46:58Speaker 01

  It wasn't, don't talk about my kids. He actually said, don't talk about Bob Kraft.

• 47:01Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 47:02Mark Gagnon?

  Okay.

• 47:03Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 47:03Mark Gagnon?

  And that was real?

• 47:04Speaker 01

  Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. It's just kinda crazy.

• 47:09Speaker 03

  Because there's, there's something else at play, like, like Brady doesn't need to do it. You know what I mean?

• 47:13Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 47:13Speaker 03

  Apparently, I think Jeff was talking to Rogan about it, and he was like, Brady wanted to do it because that's, he loves roast. Apparently Brady, like, when he's like, in the locker room, like, a couple hours before a game, like, kinda like decompressing, or like, trying to escape a little bit. He'll like, or maybe after a game, whatever, but like, he'll just watch roast, like, old comedy central roast.

• 47:30Speaker 01

  That's crazy.

• 47:31Speaker 03

  And he was like, I like these kinds of jokes, and he wanted to do that, like, for comedies, like, I wanna, I wanna relive this era of, of stand-up.

• 47:38Speaker 01

  They also paid him 20 million dollars.

• 47:40Speaker 03

  That helps, you know, but for Tom Brady, I mean, that's, what is that, a thousand dollars?

• 47:43Speaker 01

  No, he said a funny thing, he's like, uh, people are like, I can't believe that you let people talk about your ex-wife like that, or something like that, and he's like, you can't believe I did this, it's like, my ex-wife cheated on me with a fucking, uh, jujitsu instructor. He goes, I don't know a man on this planet that wouldn't take 20 million dollars for people to make fun of him for that.

• 48:04Speaker 01

  It's just like, of course.

• 48:06Mark Gagnon?

  But the ex-wife is fair game, but your former boss, it's off limits?

• 48:11Speaker 03

  Boss never cheated on him.

• 48:13Speaker 01

  Well, he did, he did let him get traded to Tampa, but, you know, he, he, I think he, uh, damn, you right about that.

• 48:22Speaker 01

  He walked up to Jeff, he goes, talk about that Brazilian bitch, man, not this guy over here, Bob Kraft, Bob Kraft took me to Israel, bro.

• 48:31Speaker 03

  I mean, it's kinda like how you guys are with the Knicks, you know, like, people shit on them, you guys get all sense.

• 48:35Speaker 01

  Yo, Mark, don't get fucked up.

• 48:36Mark Gagnon?

  Yo, yo, yo, don't, don't, don't.

• 48:37Speaker 01

  You haven't been fucked up in the middle of a podcast before? I was just saying, like, have you ever? There's a, there's a weird feeling in New York right now.

• 48:46Speaker 03

  What, that's like a jinx is coming?

• 48:49Speaker 01

  It's funny, why? Why you even gotta say the word?

• 48:51Speaker 03

  I'm asking, I'm asking if that's, if that's what you were gonna say.

• 48:53Speaker 01

  New Yorkers, we're the most arrogant.

• 48:55Speaker 03

  Chill out.

• 48:56Speaker 01

  Entitled.

• 48:56Speaker 03

  I'm asking, I'm asking.

• 48:57Speaker 01

  Motherfuckers on the planet, that's part of our charm.

• 49:02Speaker 01

  But we ain't used to things going this well with the Knicks. And it's creating an interesting feeling. Like even at the cellar last night, there was a couple comics came up to me and they're like, "Hey, man, how about those?" And I was like, "Don't even talk about it." He's like, I was like, "Mike Canning," he goes, "Hey, man, how about those?" I was like, "Let's not even talk about it." He's like, "You're right, I don't want to talk about it."

• 49:23Speaker 03

  It's like Voldemort.

• 49:24Speaker 01

  It's like, "Don't even mention it, things are going alright." Lowkey, I haven't been watching, I'm hesitant.

• 49:30Speaker 03

  That might be it.

• 49:31Speaker 01

  I'm hesitant to buy a ticket. I'm like, "I ain't go to a single game this season."

• 49:39Speaker 01

  Just say they're expensive. Say they're expensive, bro. That too.

• 49:44Speaker 03

  He's expanding the studios.

• 49:45Speaker 01

  That's why, that's why I'm not firing a one-size seat. Man, I don't want it, James. Deadass, I ain't go to a single game, but like, yo, we've been better. Sorry, I was following the game. I'm bad luck.

• 49:56Speaker 03

  New Yorkers are so, you tell them you believe in God, they're like, "Oh, you're a what, religious moron?" And then you tell them you like, wore Knicks jersey on the wrong day and they're like, "Dude, you can't do that, it's part of a special spell." It makes no sense.

• 50:07Speaker 01

  But we believe, we believe in- You believe in demons, shut the fuck up.

• 50:10Speaker 03

  Bro, there's a whole book dedicated to it, thousands of years old.

• 50:12Speaker 01

  I believe in demons too, and whatever demons have been putting pressure on my Knicks for the last 40 years, please alleviate some of that shit this year, demons. It is, son, the energy, I've never felt this. People don't even want to talk about it in a group chat. Like, I have, my group chats for basketball games go crazy. And there's just like, third quarter, we're up by 40, someone will be like, "Looking good."

• 50:41Speaker 01

  Someone put a broom emoji, I think Jermill put the broom emoji in the group chat. Nobody even responds. The second the game is over, like, "Yeah, we got that sweep." Son, I posted one video that a guy made, it was like a, like a song about it. About us sweeping Philly. And even after that, I was like, "I ruined it, dude." Like, I was- Oh, you posted it before the game? No, after, it was even after, I'm like, "We still got another six."

• 51:12Speaker 03

  When is the next game?

• 51:14Speaker 01

  This, the, uh, what's it called? Series is two, two. So we gotta wait for them to settle that. So we got a little time to fuck shit up.

• 51:21Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah, they gotta start partying and shit.

• 51:23Speaker 01

  Yo, everybody just, don't go to Miami and get on the yacht. Don't make the mistake.

• 51:29Speaker 03

  You saw the interview with Jalen? Where they were like, how do you feel the fact that like they built this team around you to like win a championship? And it's working, da, da, da. And his response was cool. He was like, look, right now I'm focused on this. Like, I'll answer that question years from now when it's all said and done. Or something like that. Like, he seemed like he was very locked in.

• 51:45Speaker 01

  New York, New York. This is a, this is a public service announcement. If you see any of these motherfuckers at the club.

• 51:54Mark Gagnon?

  Snitch.

• 51:54Speaker 01

  I don't even want you guys at Carbone, Teresee. I don't want you at Four Charles. I don't even want you eating red meat for the next month. If you see any Knicks out of the house, you gotta call 311. What's the emergency hotline? Is it 311? You call 311 and you report them immediately. You guys gotta be in your houses in Westchester, Jersey, or Connecticut, wherever the fuck they stay.

• 52:16Mark Gagnon?

  No fucking hoes.

• 52:17Speaker 01

  No, and New York hoes, by the way, New York hoes, help.

• 52:21Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah.

• 52:22Speaker 01

  Stay away.

• 52:23Mark Gagnon?

  Stay away.

• 52:24Speaker 01

  Keep that pussy closed for one month. Exactly. This is blood sport. We need these motherfuckers filled with testosterone for the next month. Do not drain these guys. Please, New York hoes.

• 52:37Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah.

• 52:37Speaker 01

  I would say Cleveland, Detroit hoes. But I'm not worried about y'all. We're not fucking with y'all anyway, so you try your best. Do whatever you do to got to come up. We are not worried about either Cleveland or Detroit hoes draining New York balls. You try your hardest. Do what, we been to Detroit and Cleveland, okay? We're coming back home to the wives. That away game is just that. There's no concern over here for our New York Knicks about getting caught up some shit in Cleveland or Detroit.

• 53:08Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah, that is pretty good.

• 53:09Speaker 01

  Shit, or OKC. Who do you think's going to the finals on the West?

• 53:16Speaker 03

  I don't even know who's in.

• 53:17Speaker 01

  It's OKC or maybe San Antonio?

• 53:20Mark Gagnon?

  Probably OKC, most likely.

• 53:22Speaker 01

  Yeah, so we have a clear path in terms of hoes. To the, I don't even want to say the words. But if it's LA versus New York, they could throw some serious distraction at the boys.

• 53:37Mark Gagnon?

  You gotta watch out for OG.

• 53:39Speaker 01

  Say again?

• 53:40Mark Gagnon?

  OG.

• 53:40Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah, with the hammy?

• 53:41Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah.

• 53:43Speaker 03

  Wait, what?

• 53:44Mark Gagnon?

  And the hoes.

• 53:44Speaker 03

  Wait, what do you mean?

• 53:45Mark Gagnon?

  He brings the hoes out.

• 53:46Speaker 01

  Yeah, we can't have all that.

• 53:48Mark Gagnon?

  You gotta chill out. Chill out.

• 53:49Speaker 03

  Yeah, are we even allowed to look at the, like, at the odds right now, or is this?

• 53:54Mark Gagnon?

  Look at the West.

• 53:55Speaker 01

  Yeah, look at the West. What is the, what is the, how's you have the West at? Who's coming out of the West?

• 54:00Speaker 03

  San Antonio or Oklahoma?

• 54:03Speaker 03

  Seventy-four on San Antonio, or on Oklahoma, sorry.

• 54:06Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah.

• 54:06Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 54:07Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah, most likely it's gonna be OKC, but we got, I mean.

• 54:12Speaker 03

  Nothing. We'll see. We can see what happens. And, yep.

• 54:15Mark Gagnon?

  Best team will win.

• 54:16Speaker 01

  Yeah, make the best team win.

• 54:18Mark Gagnon?

  Yep.

• 54:19Speaker 03

  Now, y'all are making me superstitious.

• 54:22Speaker 01

  I don't think you know what this means, bro.

• 54:24Speaker 03

  I really don't.

• 54:25Speaker 01

  We, we are gonna, if the Knicks win, we will make Mom Donnie a citizen.

• 54:31Speaker 03

  I think he's a citizen.

• 54:32Mark Gagnon?

  Nah.

• 54:33Speaker 03

  Double citizen.

• 54:34Speaker 01

  We gonna make him a double citizen.

• 54:37Mark Gagnon?

  Key to the city.

• 54:38Speaker 01

  He's gonna get what he gets to be whatever he wants in the United States. He could use his African accent. He, if he wins, he could use his African accent for the rest of the week.

• 54:49Speaker 03

  A week.

• 54:50Speaker 01

  The rest will come. You get to do, we'll, hey, New York will be a communist city. If he wins.

• 55:00Speaker 03

  I mean, the Soviets are good at sports.

• 55:02Mark Gagnon?

  Whoa, whoa, whoa.

• 55:03Speaker 03

  I'm just saying, the Soviets, they had a great run.

• 55:05Mark Gagnon?

  Fucking comedy.

• 55:07Speaker 03

  I'm helping you out.

• 55:08Mark Gagnon?

  Red on two.

• 55:09Speaker 03

  There's something about a little Soviet, you know what I mean? Hammer and sickle vibes that makes, makes it good sports, Tim. That's all I'm saying. Maybe we could use a little more of that. Think about all the women in burkas the men are gonna be smashing. A little more testosterone. Right?

• 55:25Speaker 01

  You would think that the Middle East would be better at sports if that was the case, right? I don't even know if they got athletes. Is there a sport that they're good at over there?

• 55:33Speaker 03

  Well, when it's, when they go somewhere else, then they get really good.

• 55:37Speaker 01

  For example?

• 55:37Speaker 03

  They go to France, you know what I mean?

• 55:39Speaker 01

  But who from the Middle East went to France? From like Northern Africa.

• 55:42Speaker 03

  Northern Africa.

• 55:43Speaker 01

  Maghreb.

• 55:44Speaker 03

  Yeah, of course. I mean, Zinedine Zidane, Kareem Benzema.

• 55:46Speaker 01

  But that's Africa. I'm talking about the Middle East.

• 55:50Speaker 03

  I mean, Mo Salah? Goes to England?

• 55:53Speaker 01

  Mo Salah is from Egypt.

• 55:54Speaker 03

  Yeah. That's the Middle East. It's Africa.

• 55:56Speaker 01

  My boy, my boy.

• 55:57Speaker 03

  That's the Middle East, bro.

• 55:58Speaker 01

  My boy, my boy.

• 55:59Speaker 03

  That's the Middle East.

• 55:59Speaker 01

  My boy, my boy.

• 56:00Speaker 03

  You don't consider Egypt the Middle East?

• 56:02Speaker 01

  No. I mean, if I'm being honest with you, I do, but not for this sake.

• 56:06Speaker 03

  Exactly.

• 56:07Speaker 01

  Like, yeah, it is. But it's Africa. Those are Africans. I'm saying, Middle East, who's nice at sports and what sport are they good at?

• 56:15Speaker 03

  Hmm, I mean, that's probably...

• 56:16Speaker 01

  Wow. Falconry or whatever?

• 56:18Speaker 03

  Falconry? Falconry? Um, yeah, I'm looking right now. There's not a, not a ton.

• 56:25Speaker 01

  Yeah, so I don't know if the burka elicits like a, a testosterone-induced drive that makes you good at a sport. I think the sport has to be baked into the culture.

• 56:34Speaker 03

  Yeah, probably true.

• 56:36Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 56:37Speaker 03

  Hmm, let me find out what the best athletes are in the Middle East. Or even sports. They're probably good at like darts or something.

• 56:46Speaker 01

  Nah, darts is a drinking man's game.

• 56:48Speaker 03

  Yeah, you gotta drink to do that. That's a good point.

• 56:51Speaker 01

  Hmm, why would you think they'd be good at that?

• 56:53Speaker 03

  Yeah, why, why was that? I don't know, I just figured it'd be like kind of an obscure sport where you're like, ah.

• 56:57Speaker 01

  Hitting a small target from a long distance away, you think that they'd be good at that for some reason?

• 57:03Speaker 03

  Some of them, they had a good run in the early 2000s, you know?

• 57:08Speaker 03

  They had a good run a little bit.

• 57:10Speaker 01

  Which country is... People would be so good at that.

• 57:15Speaker 03

  I mean, you know.

• 57:15Speaker 01

  Mark, do you have any, uh?

• 57:17Speaker 03

  Some of the Saudi boys are pretty good.

• 57:18Speaker 01

  You think that's...

• 57:19Speaker 03

  Back in the day.

• 57:20Speaker 01

  Those were big targets, though, like...

• 57:22Speaker 03

  I mean, sort of.

• 57:24Speaker 01

  You can't even miss it.

• 57:25Speaker 03

  No, you can miss it.

• 57:26Speaker 01

  Honestly, dude?

• 57:27Speaker 03

  You can miss it.

• 57:28Speaker 01

  I don't think you can miss it.

• 57:29Speaker 03

  Which would be so embarrassing, having to loop around.

• 57:31Speaker 01

  Bro.

• 57:33Speaker 03

  Dude, going straight down the middle.

• 57:35Speaker 01

  And slicing between them? Like that dude in the wingsuit? Like, you just go right between and then everybody's confused, like, oh, somebody saved it. Now you see it slowly.

• 57:49Speaker 01

  That would be nuts. Like you doing tricks on it.

• 57:52Speaker 03

  Yeah, I don't know. It doesn't seem like there's a, soccer is what they say, but I can't think of the best.

• 57:58Speaker 01

  Not even.

• 57:58Speaker 03

  Emirati or Saudi soccer player or Omani.

• 58:01Speaker 01

  Yeah, I don't think they got it, man.

• 58:02Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 58:03Speaker 01

  I don't think they got it. Anyway, shout out the Knicks, man, and we got your back. We're here and the whole city is coming together. So whatever you guys need, we got you. But we also are gonna call 311 if we see you out at the clubs or see you, you know, you getting after hoes. And I think that that's like our responsibility as a city to do.

• 58:20Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 58:21Speaker 01

  Given that our tax dollars are going to pay for these arenas to be built, etc.

• 58:26Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 58:26Speaker 01

  You know, we've been supporting you guys all year.

• 58:29Speaker 03

  But no snitch rule doesn't apply now.

• 58:31Speaker 01

  Yeah, I don't even think it's snitching, bro.

• 58:33Speaker 03

  It's not.

• 58:33Speaker 01

  Nah, it's snitching.

• 58:34Speaker 03

  It's civic duty.

• 58:35Speaker 01

  I think it's a civic duty.

• 58:36Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 58:36Speaker 01

  If you see something, say something.

• 58:38Speaker 03

  Nut off and shit like that, you snitching on them? Yeah, come on.

• 58:41Speaker 01

  I mean, like, you could get your nut off next month, bro.

• 58:44Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 58:44Speaker 01

  Imagine the nuts you're gonna get off with a championship.

• 58:46Speaker 03

  Woo, yep.

• 58:47Speaker 01

  Imagine the caliber.

• 58:49Speaker 03

  It's okay.

• 58:51Speaker 01

  Taking about the type of nuts the dude's gonna get out of it.

• 58:54Speaker 03

  Think about the size of that. Think about how much nut.

• 58:59Speaker 03

  Hypothetically, if someone wins the championship, someone.

• 59:02Speaker 01

  They gonna pussy, they're gonna be drowning.

• 59:06Speaker 03

  Think about how big those nuts will be everywhere they want, anywhere on this podcast.

• 59:11Speaker 01

  I, I think, man, I mean, it's easy for me to say as a married man.

• 59:16Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 59:17Speaker 01

  You know, but like,

• 59:21Speaker 01

  I think Martha Stewart gotta open up for the boys.

• 59:25Speaker 03

  Why Martha Stewart?

• 59:27Speaker 01

  That was.

• 59:31Speaker 03

  Did you mean to say Martha Stewart?

• 59:32Speaker 01

  Nah.

• 59:38Speaker 01

  That's interesting, man. It's something, man.

• 59:41Speaker 03

  I knew he was thinking of someone and it wasn't with his staff.

• 59:44Speaker 01

  Yeah, man, who was I thinking of, man?

• 59:45Speaker 03

  No, you said.

• 59:49Speaker 01

  Think Margaret Thatcher need to open up for the boys, man. I think Margaret Thatcher needs to give it up for the boys.

• 59:57Speaker 01

  Did I get that one wrong again, too?

• 59:59Speaker 03

  I think, I hope you got it wrong. I don't think it was Margaret Thatcher.

• 1:00:04Speaker 03

  Someone, someone's got to open it up. No one that, no one that we know.

• 1:00:09Speaker 01

  Honestly?

• 1:00:11Mark Gagnon?

  Mark's grandmother.

• 1:00:12Speaker 01

  Yo!

• 1:00:13Mark Gagnon?

  With all due respect. Come on, bro.

• 1:00:17Speaker 01

  I mean, it didn't-

• 1:00:17Mark Gagnon?

  For our next championship, come on!

• 1:00:20Speaker 01

  That's a two for one, too.

• 1:00:22Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah, she won us the war. That's the next one.

• 1:00:24Speaker 01

  This is the next war. And this is almost like a more unlikely scenario. But if they threw in a Spitfire, if you, if you get,

• 1:00:33Speaker 01

  if you get,

• 1:00:37Speaker 01

  if you had her just spinning like a little chicken on a rotisserie-

• 1:00:41Mark Gagnon?

  Hey, come on, man.

• 1:00:42Speaker 01

  With all due respect.

• 1:00:44Speaker 03

  British intelligence?

• 1:00:46Speaker 01

  Let's not talk about foreign spies, Mark. Let's not talk about foreign spies infiltrating our-

• 1:00:52Speaker 03

  Can we do feelings, no facts?

• 1:00:53Speaker 01

  Yes. Alright, guys, stay a break for a second. Here's something that anyone who's ever hired, anyone will tell you. The difference between a good hire and a nightmare hire usually isn't the resume. It's whether the person actually wants the job. You can have two candidates with identical experience, same school, same title, same years of experience, and one of them is going to be a home run and the other one is going to be a disaster. And the only thing separating them is that one of them is genuinely excited about the role. They've done their homework. They ask real questions. They seem like they actually fit. The other one is just looking for a job, not your job. Big difference. Excitement matters. It tells you everything. So if you're hiring and you want a candidate who's passionate about your role,

• 1:01:36Speaker 01

  but you can't get that insight from a resume unless you post your job on ZipRecruiter. And now you can try it for free at ziprecruiter.com/flagrant. Here's how it works. ZipRecruiter has a new feature that actually- Shows you the most interested qualified candidates first. So you're not sifting through hundreds of resumes trying to figure out who actually wants to be there. The candidates can tell you in their own words why they want your job. And ZipRecruiter's matching tech finds qualified people fast. No wonder it's the number one rated hiring site on G2. So find candidates who really want your job on ZipRecruiter. Four out of five employers who post on ZipRecruiter get a quality candidate within the first day. Try for free at ziprecruiter.com/flagrant.

• 1:02:21Speaker 01

  That's ziprecruiter.com/flagrant. Meet your match on ZipRecruiter. All right, guys, listen up. We are actually doing something meaningful for once. All right. It's called the Life Paddle Classic. And huge shout out to Neurogum because they are supporting it. We are getting everybody together for Paddle Good Vibes, a little competition, and most importantly, raising money for families going through IVF. And this is the important part. 100% of the proceeds are going directly to Baby Quest. That's the IVF charity that I've been working with. They're absolutely phenomenal organization. They're helping families who are struggling with the insane costs of IVF. And we're going to help them. Okay, we're trying to help take care of some of that burden off of people.

• 1:03:03Speaker 01

  Now, if you can't pull up to the event, you can still support it by grabbing the Andrew Schultz and Neuro Dad bundle. Okay, you get the Energy and Focus Gum and the Sleep and Recharge Gum. So you got the energy for the day and then you got some sleep when you're ready to get that rest. And every dollar that you guys support is going to go to the cause. And I mean that sincerely. This is something obviously very near and dear to my hearts and many different people went through this process. So any support that you guys can give is absolutely amazing. So whether you play paddle, you just want to help people that are trying to become parents, this is a really good one to get behind. The Life Paddle Classic, June 4th, Paddle House in Dumbo, Brooklyn. Come hang, man.

• 1:03:48Speaker 01

  Come compete, support the cause. Let's just do something great together. I really, really appreciate you if, yeah, if you're just indulging in this in any way. So you can go to the link below, you get the Andrew Schultz and Neuro Dad bundle and help us raise money for families going through IVF. Remember, every single dollar goes directly to Baby Quest. There are limited quantities available, so do not wait. Go to neurogum.com/pages/shultz and be part of something that actually changes lives, hopefully creates many, many, many lives. And we'll be continuing to do more with Baby Quest and a huge shout out to Paddle House for hosting it. It's an absolutely amazing place to go play paddle. You guys should do that outside of this, this charity event.

• 1:04:32Speaker 01

  But definitely come hang out at the charity event, have some fucking drinks, have some food, chew some Neuro Gum and just hang. So June 4th, that's what we're gonna be. We'll see you there.

• 1:04:42Speaker 04

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• 1:05:11Speaker 03

  Okay, let's just go feelings on facts and just rip through these as fast as possible, okay? There's a Chinese spy that's the mayor in a town in California. Did you hear about this?

• 1:05:19Speaker 01

  Arcadia.

• 1:05:20Speaker 03

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:05:22Speaker 01

  I've been trying to tell y'all. Yo, can we give out a little credit?

• 1:05:25Speaker 03

  Come on, man.

• 1:05:26Speaker 01

  Give out a little credit on this podcast right now, today. Everybody listening, everybody watching, Alex Media has said that there is a Chinese spy network that has been operating in the United States for the last decade that he's been on this podcast. He's been called racist for this.

• 1:05:39Speaker 03

  Yep.

• 1:05:40Speaker 01

  He's been called hateful for this.

• 1:05:41Speaker 03

  I don't know if all that, but... They said you were a bigot?

• 1:05:45Speaker 01

  He's been called a bigot.

• 1:05:46Speaker 03

  Yeah. They got tunnels all throughout Chinatown. It's not just the Jews, bro.

• 1:05:50Speaker 05

  Where did Al start his company?

• 1:05:54Mark Gagnon?

  Hey, I'm switching sides. I told you that.

• 1:05:57Speaker 01

  No, they got that motherfucker out of here. Al was probably the one who snitched.

• 1:06:00Speaker 05

  Nah, I think Al set up WTF around the world.

• 1:06:03Speaker 03

  Oh, spy. In the Chinese spy. You do have him in California.

• 1:06:07Mark Gagnon?

  I do.

• 1:06:08Speaker 03

  And you have him in New York.

• 1:06:09Mark Gagnon?

  Dude, come on, man. Come on, man. But I'm switching sides. I don't care. I'm not a gymnast. Taking a bag.

• 1:06:19Speaker 03

  The skier?

• 1:06:19Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah. Oh, skiing, whatever. Whatever.

• 1:06:22Speaker 01

  I saw.

• 1:06:23Mark Gagnon?

  God, he knew.

• 1:06:25Speaker 01

  I saw Eileen Gu last week.

• 1:06:27Mark Gagnon?

  Really?

• 1:06:28Speaker 01

  She's definitely listened to the pod. Let me tell you.

• 1:06:32Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah?

• 1:06:33Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:06:33Mark Gagnon?

  Yo, shout out to you. Get the bag, baby.

• 1:06:36Speaker 01

  She definitely listened to the pod. Woo.

• 1:06:39Speaker 03

  You felt, you felt this.

• 1:06:40Speaker 01

  Or, or, or she knew that her homegirl was about to get outed as a spy in LA.

• 1:06:45Speaker 03

  Oh, she was.

• 1:06:46Speaker 01

  As the mayor.

• 1:06:46Speaker 03

  Hmm.

• 1:06:47Speaker 01

  And so she was worried about the, the walls closing in a little bit.

• 1:06:51Speaker 03

  The Great Wall.

• 1:06:52Speaker 01

  The Great Wall is closing in. So, so what happens to this mayor? She gets killed, right?

• 1:06:58Speaker 03

  And I, no, that's, I don't think.

• 1:06:59Speaker 01

  Isn't that treason?

• 1:07:00Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah, treason.

• 1:07:01Speaker 03

  Dude.

• 1:07:01Speaker 01

  The punishment for treason is death.

• 1:07:03Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah.

• 1:07:04Speaker 03

  But what do you have to do to be treasonous?

• 1:07:06Speaker 01

  You have to be a Chinese spy.

• 1:07:07Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah, that's pretty much it.

• 1:07:09Speaker 03

  But no, that's not treason. That's, if you're spy, if you get caught being a spy in a different country, is that treason?

• 1:07:14Speaker 01

  No, if you're an American citizen, which I assume she is, because she's mayor of Arcadia, and then she's handing off secrets to the Chinese, you obviously have to kill her in the most Chinese way possible. I think we gotta run her over with a tank in the middle of a square.

• 1:07:27Mark Gagnon?

  First, bind her feet up, though.

• 1:07:28Speaker 01

  Bind her feet up so she can't move. Let me get a peep at them. And then we run her over with a tank in a square.

• 1:07:34Mark Gagnon?

  Damn.

• 1:07:36Speaker 01

  Guys, this is not like, I'm just trying to be a constitutionalist.

• 1:07:39Mark Gagnon?

  I'm America first.

• 1:07:40Speaker 05

  The felony charges come with a potential sentence of up to 10 years in prison.

• 1:07:44Speaker 01

  10 years for being a snitch?

• 1:07:46Mark Gagnon?

  Not enough. They live mad long, bro.

• 1:07:49Speaker 01

  That's exactly, it's not even a dent.

• 1:07:52Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah.

• 1:07:53Speaker 01

  10 years, that's another thing. Your sentence should be dependent on how long you live in America.

• 1:07:59Speaker 03

  Proportional taxing.

• 1:08:00Speaker 01

  Exactly. So like Asians gotta spend way longer.

• 1:08:04Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah.

• 1:08:05Speaker 01

  Black people, not that long.

• 1:08:07Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah, come on, reduce it a little bit.

• 1:08:09Speaker 03

  That's progressive policy right there.

• 1:08:10Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah.

• 1:08:11Speaker 01

  Well, because it's about equity, not equality.

• 1:08:13Speaker 03

  Yeah, I like that.

• 1:08:14Speaker 01

  You know what I mean?

• 1:08:15Speaker 03

  I like that.

• 1:08:15Mark Gagnon?

  Hmm. Mumdani's American.

• 1:08:17Speaker 01

  Clock it. Clock it. It's about equity, not equality. So if Asians average between 200 and 300 years of life, then a life sentence to them should be at least like five times the average. So this person right here, you're saying you can't just kill someone for treason? I thought that is the punishment.

• 1:08:35Mark Gagnon?

  I don't know if that's.

• 1:08:36Speaker 05

  I don't think she's going up on treason charges.

• 1:08:38Speaker 03

  I don't know if she's a citizen. I can't even find a definitive answer.

• 1:08:40Speaker 01

  How the fuck is she mayor if she's not a citizen?

• 1:08:43Speaker 03

  Do you have to be a citizen?

• 1:08:44Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah, I don't think so.

• 1:08:45Speaker 03

  I don't know.

• 1:08:45Speaker 01

  What fucking country do we live in?

• 1:08:47Speaker 03

  No, I'm saying we should.

• 1:08:48Speaker 01

  You don't even have to be from here to be in public office.

• 1:08:49Mark Gagnon?

  Arnold Schwarzenegger.

• 1:08:51Speaker 01

  He's a citizen.

• 1:08:52Speaker 03

  No, he's not.

• 1:08:53Speaker 01

  Arnold Schwarzenegger is not a

• 1:08:58Speaker 01

  citizen? Of course he's a citizen.

• 1:09:00Speaker 03

  He'll sound like one.

• 1:09:03Speaker 01

  Well.

• 1:09:05Speaker 01

  Al.

• 1:09:06Speaker 03

  Fucking Al.

• 1:09:08Speaker 01

  Al, his dad, baby. What makes him a citizen, Al? Al, what makes him? My mom, well, yeah, she is a citizen. My mom got an accent.

• 1:09:16Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah, but she got it after the fact.

• 1:09:19Speaker 01

  What do you mean? She, my, my, my mom got her Scottish accent after she became a citizen.

• 1:09:24Mark Gagnon?

  Like mad late, she got a citizenship.

• 1:09:26Speaker 01

  Yeah, but so did Arnold. He got a citizenship late.

• 1:09:29Mark Gagnon?

  Check, check the papers.

• 1:09:30Speaker 05

  He got it in 1983.

• 1:09:32Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah.

• 1:09:33Speaker 01

  Yeah. 1983, he's a citizen, Al. And look at Eileen Wang or whatever her name is.

• 1:09:39Speaker 03

  Why are they all named Eileen?

• 1:09:40Speaker 01

  Eileen and Esther. So when Chinese people move here, they take a biblical first name. You go Peter is a good one. Mark Lucas, you'll find a lot of like biblical first name and then Chinese as fuck last name. Yeah, Esther, huge. There's so many Chinese people named Esther or Asians named Esther. I think it's a smart move. It's like you're moving to a host country. You want to make sure that your kids are like not teased or whatever for your Chinese name. Yes?

• 1:10:05Speaker 03

  I don't think Eileen's a biblical name.

• 1:10:07Speaker 01

  Eileen Back, so you could suck his dick.

• 1:10:19Speaker 01

  This thing is at best, bro. Come on, bro.

• 1:10:22Mark Gagnon?

  Yo, Mark, go home.

• 1:10:23Speaker 01

  Get back here, you bum.

• 1:10:24Mark Gagnon?

  Mark, go home.

• 1:10:26Speaker 01

  Bring your grandma. Bring your grandma while I'm leaning back. Bring your grandma, it's all due to smash.

• 1:10:32Speaker 03

  Let me just do the rest of the story. This is stupid. This is dumb, dude.

• 1:10:37Speaker 01

  Yo, the long play on the house.

• 1:10:43Speaker 03

  Damn.

• 1:10:44Speaker 01

  That was fire. He knew that was for you too, cuz I ain't gonna know no biblical day.

• 1:10:53Speaker 01

  Still got it. Still got it, baby. Still got it. Young Schultz, still got it. Can we put some still, no facts?

• 1:11:01Mark Gagnon?

  You gotta take a drug.

• 1:11:03Speaker 01

  Can we do? So, hold on. So, what's gonna happen to this little Chinese finger trap in Los Angeles? Does she get locked up? Like, we gotta have some sort of punitive measure taking place here.

• 1:11:13Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:11:15Speaker 05

  She might get 10 years. It's not treason.

• 1:11:19Speaker 05

  And that's all I got. I cannot.

• 1:11:20Speaker 01

  Can we revoke the citizenship?

• 1:11:23Speaker 03

  I don't know if she's even a citizen, bro.

• 1:11:25Speaker 01

  Guys, what fuck? Do we have a country?

• 1:11:28Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah, like.

• 1:11:28Speaker 01

  Do we even have a country? You can, you can be an elected official and you're not even a citizen of the United States of America? What the fuck is the point?

• 1:11:37Speaker 01

  So, is she a citizen?

• 1:11:38Speaker 05

  Nothing on this says she's a citizen.

• 1:11:40Speaker 01

  Can we look up Arcadia and see what's Asian or Chinese about it that we should have known?

• 1:11:45Speaker 05

  Let's find out.

• 1:11:46Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:11:47Speaker 03

  I don't even know really where Arcadia is.

• 1:11:48Speaker 01

  It's, it's like, uh, Los Angeles, but it's like outskirts.

• 1:11:51Speaker 03

  Oh, really?

• 1:11:52Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:11:52Speaker 03

  Have you been there?

• 1:11:53Speaker 01

  No, I looked it on a map today.

• 1:11:56Speaker 01

  I zoomed out, looked at it. Arcadia, California is a city in Los Angeles County, uh, United States. Located about 13 miles northeast of downtown Los Angeles in the San Gabriel Valley. At the base of the San Gabriel Mountains, it contains a series of adjacent parks and system of the San Anita Park, racetrack.

• 1:12:16Speaker 03

  Let's go through demographics.

• 1:12:17Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:12:20Speaker 03

  Okay, it's, uh, looks like 18% white. 1.5% black.

• 1:12:29Speaker 03

  64% Asian.

• 1:12:34Speaker 03

  13% has No, no, we can't. This is America. You can't just bomb a place in America.

• 1:12:40Mark Gagnon?

  Nope, nope.

• 1:12:45Speaker 01

  People gotta know who you are.

• 1:12:46Mark Gagnon?

  No, you can't act violent. You can't, you can't do violence.

• 1:12:49Speaker 01

  People gotta know.

• 1:12:50Mark Gagnon?

  Stop it.

• 1:12:50Speaker 01

  They gotta know who you are, man.

• 1:12:52Speaker 03

  Funny Al's rules about what he wants bleeped, because his actual rule on that is he doesn't want the violence thing.

• 1:12:57Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah, it's violence.

• 1:12:59Speaker 01

  But nobody got a bomb even.

• 1:13:03Speaker 01

  Like, nobody listening to this is gonna hear your idea and then execute it. They're like, oh yeah, we should bomb it, like.

• 1:13:07Mark Gagnon?

  And what if they do? Boom.

• 1:13:09Speaker 01

  Exactly, that will happen. Boom.

• 1:13:14Speaker 03

  Okay, the top, uh,

• 1:13:15Mark Gagnon?

  Nah, we gotta bleep that.

• 1:13:16Speaker 03

  The top private employers in the city are Atlas Assembly, uh, Fish in a Bucket.

• 1:13:29Speaker 03

  Fish in a Bucket Enterprise.

• 1:13:36Speaker 01

  That's real.

• 1:13:38Speaker 03

  Nordstrom, Macy's, uh, and Cheesecake Factory. Also Din Tai Fung.

• 1:13:47Speaker 01

  Son, how the fuck did we elect a Chinese fish head spy as mayor of a city in Los Angeles? How is that even humanly possible?

• 1:13:58Mark Gagnon?

  They took over the whole city.

• 1:14:00Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:14:00Mark Gagnon?

  All sleeper cells.

• 1:14:02Speaker 01

  So you think it extends beyond just her?

• 1:14:05Mark Gagnon?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:14:06Speaker 01

  So you think there are other people in the administration that are also Chinese spies?

• 1:14:09Mark Gagnon?

  Yes.

• 1:14:10Speaker 01

  Like, why would it just be her?

• 1:14:11Mark Gagnon?

  Yes, exactly.

• 1:14:11Speaker 01

  I think we need to do some serious vetting.

• 1:14:13Mark Gagnon?

  Yes.

• 1:14:14Speaker 01

  Why is nobody talking about this? Like, this isn't a big fucking deal.

• 1:14:18Speaker 03

  Yeah, it's a little sketchy. Oof, I'm going through some of their last mayors. So Eileen Wang, Sharon Kwan, Michael Chow, Paul Chang, Shou Tay, Shou Tay again.

• 1:14:32Mark Gagnon?

  The baseball player?

• 1:14:33Speaker 03

  No. Shou Tay Ohtani, exactly. Uh, and then, uh, Roger Chandler.

• 1:14:41Speaker 01

  Yo, guys.

• 1:14:47Mark Gagnon?

  Funny timing, because Trump's in China right now, speaking to Xi Jinping.

• 1:14:52Speaker 01

  Oh, really?

• 1:14:52Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah.

• 1:14:53Speaker 01

  You think they waited for this?

• 1:14:54Mark Gagnon?

  I think so. Funny timing.

• 1:14:56Speaker 01

  Now-

• 1:14:57Speaker 03

  Did Trump bring it up to him?

• 1:14:58Speaker 01

  Now, by waited, who is, who waited? Is this, ooh, this is interesting. Is this the Trump administration going, hey, what the fuck is going on over here? We want a bargaining chip to get something out of you. We know that you're trying to like interfere with our democracy, so give us a little something. We won't make a big stink of this. Or is this Democratic opposition trying to sabotage his trip with China?

• 1:15:26Mark Gagnon?

  Oh, no, no. I think it's the first because he's going over there a little bit weak because of how shit is going with Iran right now. He kept signaling like, oh, we're gonna have this shit figured out. And now it's not. So now China got a little pressure like, yo, you fucking up this-

• 1:15:40Speaker 01

  You are fucking up-

• 1:15:41Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah.

• 1:15:42Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:15:42Mark Gagnon?

  So now he's going over with it. That's a little leverage play right there. It's like, oh, world, you got spies over here? Word?

• 1:15:48Speaker 01

  I mean, yo, shout out China, bro. That was impressive.

• 1:15:51Mark Gagnon?

  I keep telling you-

• 1:15:52Speaker 03

  Game recognize game a little bit.

• 1:15:53Mark Gagnon?

  I keep telling you.

• 1:15:54Speaker 01

  It's like, this is how, this is how audacious it is. Like, if you were a spy, like, if we sent a spy over somewhere, I don't think you'd make them the mayor of the city. You'd make them like the mayor's best friend or something.

• 1:16:06Speaker 03

  But it's a tough sell everywhere else. Like, there's no, there's no America Town in China. Probably not.

• 1:16:12Mark Gagnon?

  We need one.

• 1:16:14Speaker 01

  Yo, it is crazy that like-

• 1:16:15Mark Gagnon?

  Do your civil duty.

• 1:16:17Speaker 01

  If there was an American, if there was an American that had moved to another country and became a politician, 1,000% that other country would assume they were a spy for America. Right? Like, there's not even a question because they already assumed that we're influencing their elections even without being over there. So if we were, they'd be like, 100% they have loyalty. But if we question it at all, it's racism. Right?

• 1:16:41Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:16:42Speaker 01

  There is a good, like, but if I, if another country, if an American moved there and became an elected official, I would think that they would be retarded to not assume that they had loyalty to America and that they were working on our behalf.

• 1:16:53Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah.

• 1:16:54Speaker 01

  I wouldn't go, oh, that's racism to assume that they're an individual operating under their own auspices. No, I'd be like, yeah, they-

• 1:16:59Mark Gagnon?

  Makes sense.

• 1:17:00Speaker 01

  If they weren't working for us, I'd be like, the fuck are they over there for?

• 1:17:02Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah.

• 1:17:03Speaker 03

  Boris Johnson.

• 1:17:04Mark Gagnon?

  You mad at this little skier bitch for taking their money?

• 1:17:06Speaker 01

  I'm not mad at nobody. I'm just curious.

• 1:17:12Speaker 01

  I'm just.

• 1:17:14Speaker 01

  What did Tucker say? I was asking questions.

• 1:17:17Speaker 03

  Boris Johnson, born in New York City, had US citizenship and then became Prime Minister of the UK and denounced his citizenship.

• 1:17:23Speaker 01

  Got him.

• 1:17:23Mark Gagnon?

  Ooh.

• 1:17:24Speaker 01

  Got him.

• 1:17:24Speaker 03

  Daniel Naboa.

• 1:17:25Mark Gagnon?

  No, but he denounced his citizenship, though.

• 1:17:27Speaker 01

  Yeah, but you gotta do what you gotta do to lead the, lead the nation.

• 1:17:30Mark Gagnon?

  Oh, okay.

• 1:17:31Speaker 03

  Born in Miami, holds Ecuadorian US citizenship, became President of Ecuador in 2023.

• 1:17:35Speaker 01

  That I understand.

• 1:17:37Speaker 03

  Pope Leo. US-born, from Chicago, became the Pope. And now is the President of the Vatican.

• 1:17:44Speaker 03

  That's pretty cool.

• 1:17:45Speaker 01

  Yeah, but don't you?

• 1:17:46Mark Gagnon?

  He's kind of getting sunned, though. Trump is kind of sunning his.

• 1:17:49Speaker 03

  Trump knows the Bible better.

• 1:17:53Speaker 03

  That's what the dude said on, uh, what's it called? He's like, yeah, obviously the Pope doesn't know what's in the Bible. Trump knows what's in the Bible.

• 1:18:00Speaker 01

  No, he did not say that.

• 1:18:01Speaker 03

  He said, like, based off of the rhetoric going on, obviously Trump must know more about Christianity than the Pope.

• 1:18:07Speaker 01

  Sarcastically? Or dead fucking serious?

• 1:18:10Speaker 03

  He's being serious.

• 1:18:11Mark Gagnon?

  Yo, what is going on?

• 1:18:12Speaker 01

  That's a hard job to just cap for that motherfucker all the time. Yeah, I know, right? Just let it go, man. He's fucking up everything. Just call it what it is. Like, you don't have to fucking cap for this dude. Like, I see that guy Scott Jennings, he's losing hair. Do you know that guy who was on CNN and his job just be like, everything Trump is doing is right? You could tell he is stressed. He's cursing at little teenagers they got out there arguing them. Every new CNN guy is younger than the last one.

• 1:18:35Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah.

• 1:18:36Speaker 01

  Right? He's like a 14-year-old putting his finger in his face and, "Get your fucking hand out of my face!" Like, he's stressed. He's stressed because there's no way. Like, how, open the straight.

• 1:18:45Speaker 03

  Anyway, are you gonna go to Arcadia for any shows coming up?

• 1:18:47Speaker 01

  I gotta perform in Arcadia.

• 1:18:49Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:18:50Speaker 01

  I'm going there for Chinese New Year. What was that Chinese New Year celebration? Do you think they leaned in or do you think they, like, they made it quiet because they're like, "Yo, we're already running this shit"?

• 1:18:59Speaker 03

  No, they probably weren't.

• 1:19:00Speaker 01

  Also, what's in Arcadia that's advantageous to the Chinese government? Is there a research lab there?

• 1:19:05Speaker 03

  They say it has one of the best public transit systems in California.

• 1:19:08Speaker 01

  All right, we're in.

• 1:19:10Speaker 03

  It's known for its light rail and its buses. Fire.

• 1:19:15Speaker 01

  Hmm.

• 1:19:16Mark Gagnon?

  Hmm.

• 1:19:17Speaker 01

  They're good, they're good at fucking making railroads, man.

• 1:19:19Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah.

• 1:19:20Speaker 01

  I would, I would give it up to them in that regard. Historically speaking, they made some good railroads.

• 1:19:27Speaker 03

  Some of the best, too.

• 1:19:28Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah.

• 1:19:29Speaker 03

  They also have-

• 1:19:29Mark Gagnon?

  Any rare metals and shit?

• 1:19:32Speaker 03

  Any rare metals?

• 1:19:33Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah.

• 1:19:33Speaker 01

  I don't think so. They gotta have some stuff over there, bro.

• 1:19:35Speaker 03

  They have a, a great healthcare system. Twenty-two acre Arcadia Hospital. It's official hospital of the-

• 1:19:42Speaker 01

  Alright, stop dick sucking China.

• 1:19:44Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah, I know, god damn.

• 1:19:45Speaker 01

  What's going on?

• 1:19:46Speaker 03

  I'm just saying what's going on in Arcadia. They're good nurses, too, apparently.

• 1:19:50Mark Gagnon?

  Nah, check the hospitals. They probably got all the shit on there.

• 1:19:54Speaker 01

  They got some deals going on over there.

• 1:19:56Speaker 03

  And they have some famous people that have moved out of there.

• 1:19:58Speaker 01

  Like?

• 1:19:59Speaker 03

  Erika Wu, a table tennis champion.

• 1:20:01Speaker 01

  Obviously.

• 1:20:01Speaker 03

  That's pretty good. Uh, Mark Twain, member of the South Korean boy band GOT7. Uh, Jet Li, international film star. Resided in Arcadia with his wife, former Miss China.

• 1:20:13Speaker 01

  Yo, he was asking to come on the pod.

• 1:20:16Speaker 03

  We gotta talk to him about this.

• 1:20:18Mark Gagnon?

  Yo.

• 1:20:19Speaker 03

  We gotta reach out to him and see what's going on.

• 1:20:20Mark Gagnon?

  I'm with that. I'll press him.

• 1:20:24Speaker 01

  How would you press the guy who's like a martial artist?

• 1:20:26Mark Gagnon?

  I'm gonna throw miles in front of me. This sucks shit.

• 1:20:29Speaker 03

  Okay, can we do more feelings of facts?

• 1:20:31Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 1:20:31Speaker 03

  Okay, Haunta virus.

• 1:20:33Speaker 01

  Fake.

• 1:20:34Speaker 03

  Alex?

• 1:20:35Mark Gagnon?

  Real. Fucking idiot.

• 1:20:39Speaker 01

  I don't think it's real.

• 1:20:40Mark Gagnon?

  People died already.

• 1:20:41Speaker 01

  No, they didn't.

• 1:20:42Mark Gagnon?

  Yes, he did. Three people died.

• 1:20:43Speaker 01

  They're on a boat. Let me tell you something.

• 1:20:45Mark Gagnon?

  Three people died.

• 1:20:45Speaker 01

  Let me tell you something. Nobody's getting off that boat.

• 1:20:48Mark Gagnon?

  A hundred and fifty people got off the boat already.

• 1:20:50Speaker 01

  This is why we got pandemics. This is why we got pandemics. Guys, if there's a deadly virus on the boat, they stay on the boat. It's not like they can't eat on the boat. It's not like they can't live. Quarantine until everybody dies, and then we don't have a pandemic.

• 1:21:04Speaker 03

  This is the headline from CNN. All passengers evacuated from cruise ship hit by Haunta virus.

• 1:21:09Speaker 01

  Why would you evacuate the people with the virus? China gotta be looking at this like, these motherfuckers about to do it again. These dumb motherfuckers about to do it again.

• 1:21:19Mark Gagnon?

  And you know where that's at? Spain. You know where I just came from?

• 1:21:22Speaker 03

  Oh, come on, Al.

• 1:21:25Speaker 01

  Patient number one, baby.

• 1:21:26Speaker 03

  Come on, Al.

• 1:21:27Speaker 01

  Patient zero, whatever.

• 1:21:30Speaker 01

  You're not either. You're not either.

• 1:21:33Mark Gagnon?

  Nah.

• 1:21:34Speaker 01

  You're not either.

• 1:21:35Mark Gagnon?

  I brought it here first.

• 1:21:36Speaker 03

  Someone already died.

• 1:21:36Speaker 01

  They're patient number one.

• 1:21:37Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah, but if I brought it here.

• 1:21:39Speaker 01

  You're just a side bitch. You didn't even get the first herpes. You got some other bitch's herpes.

• 1:21:49Speaker 01

  Nah, you gotta keep them on the boat in perpetuity. And if they make it, they make it, and God bless them. If they don't, it'd be like that.

• 1:21:55Speaker 03

  Just leave them on the boat?

• 1:21:57Speaker 05

  Also, it's the Canary Islands.

• 1:21:59Speaker 03

  Oh, no, it's Spain.

• 1:22:00Speaker 01

  It's Africa.

• 1:22:01Mark Gagnon?

  Shut up. Shut up, Miles.

• 1:22:03Speaker 01

  No, no, I think he's making a good point, which is like, would they unload them to Europe? No. But will they unload them to Africa? Yeah.

• 1:22:12Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah, but Canary Islands where all the Spanish people go to fucking, that's their Miami.

• 1:22:17Speaker 01

  But they gotta stop it. They gotta stop it. You're not allowed to go. I'm being dead serious, guys. Like, why are we being so loosey-goosey with this? If it's a deadly virus, you keep them on the boat. We see what happens. It's not like we shouldn't give them food. Give them food, give them doctors, whatever. But you just...

• 1:22:34Speaker 05

  Also, don't dock it. If we're, if we're doing this hypothetical, don't put it at a dock.

• 1:22:38Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:22:38Speaker 05

  Leave it out.

• 1:22:38Speaker 01

  You out there. Bye.

• 1:22:39Speaker 05

  Leave it out, and then bring the food out and back, like...

• 1:22:42Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah. The way the Dutch guy got it is hilarious.

• 1:22:44Speaker 01

  I told you how he got it.

• 1:22:47Mark Gagnon?

  Fucking a rat.

• 1:22:48Speaker 03

  He was a rat fucker.

• 1:22:49Mark Gagnon?

  You'll listen?

• 1:22:50Speaker 03

  Apparently, he went to a trash dump on his vacation.

• 1:22:53Speaker 01

  And then?

• 1:22:54Speaker 03

  And then fucked a rat. But he went to the trash dump first.

• 1:22:57Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 1:22:57Speaker 03

  That was like a part of his sightseeing.

• 1:22:59Speaker 01

  Why?

• 1:23:00Speaker 03

  That part is not explained.

• 1:23:01Speaker 05

  From what I understand, it is a landfill, and it says, "The world's most southern landfill." Because it's at the bottom of the continent.

• 1:23:09Speaker 01

  And he checked it out.

• 1:23:10Speaker 05

  Because it was in Argentina, right? It's in Shuaia, yeah.

• 1:23:12Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:23:13Speaker 03

  And he was like, "On my vacation, my wife, we're gonna go look at garbage."

• 1:23:15Mark Gagnon?

  I blame y'all. Y'all white people always just gotta look at shit.

• 1:23:19Speaker 03

  That part is kinda on us.

• 1:23:20Speaker 01

  Like, y'all be doing this shit.

• 1:23:21Mark Gagnon?

  Like, come on, bro.

• 1:23:22Speaker 03

  That is on us.

• 1:23:23Speaker 01

  You're right. I don't even know what to say. I'm embarrassed.

• 1:23:26Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:23:26Speaker 01

  Because I wanna know what the trash dump looks like. Like a little party is like, yo.

• 1:23:30Speaker 03

  You're curious.

• 1:23:31Speaker 01

  I wish I wasn't.

• 1:23:32Speaker 03

  Because it's so far south. Cause you like, there's no way they have trash this far south.

• 1:23:36Speaker 01

  I also need to see what like an Argentinian trash.

• 1:23:38Speaker 03

  Yeah, what does he look like?

• 1:23:40Speaker 01

  Yada problem.

• 1:23:40Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:23:41Speaker 01

  Yada problem. It's just got like Nazi memorabilia in it.

• 1:23:44Speaker 03

  No, no, the trash dump has a bunch of birds that come and pick food off of it. It's a birding site.

• 1:23:49Speaker 01

  Oh God, with the white people and the birds, man.

• 1:23:52Speaker 03

  Fuck it. This weird obsession, bro. Look how cool this is. Whoa. That's fire. Isn't that sick? Do you want to see? No. You don't even want, you're not even curious a little bit? Nah, not at all.

• 1:24:03Speaker 01

  Guys?

• 1:24:03Speaker 03

  Not at all.

• 1:24:05Speaker 01

  We need to do better. We need to do better, but you just leave them on the boat. All right, what else we got? Feelings, no facts.

• 1:24:10Speaker 03

  Okay, uh, UFO file has been dropped by Trump officially. Desperation.

• 1:24:15Speaker 01

  Yeah, that's desperation, man. That's how you know he's fucking up.

• 1:24:21Speaker 03

  I don't know. I mean, yeah, people have not been super stoked about this file release.

• 1:24:24Speaker 01

  Cause it's nothing. It's just like black and white target practice. You could create it with AI, like nah.

• 1:24:30Speaker 03

  This is the Epstein binders.

• 1:24:33Speaker 01

  Yeah, a whole lot of nothing.

• 1:24:35Speaker 03

  Yeah, a whole lot of nothing.

• 1:24:36Speaker 01

  Whole lot of nothing. Though I would like to talk to a UFO guy, cause I want to understand why they are so convinced it's real. Like I spoke to that Bob Lazar dude and like, he convinced me that what he believed, he convinced me that he wasn't lying. Now, that doesn't mean that it is true, what he was working on was UFO technology, but like, I, I don't believe that he was a liar that was just trying to like grift and make money.

• 1:25:03Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:25:04Speaker 01

  If anything, I believe that he like, didn't really want to share it because he had like, uh, received so much backlash throughout his entire life.

• 1:25:10Speaker 03

  Hmm, yeah. I didn't like, Trump's tweet is a little, that, that's how I knew it was bullshit.

• 1:25:15Speaker 01

  Why?

• 1:25:16Speaker 03

  It's cause Trump goes, as from my promise to you, the Department of War has released the first tranche of UFO UAP files to the public for you. People can decide for themselves, what the hell is going on? Have fun and enjoy.

• 1:25:29Speaker 03

  That's when I was like, alright, the second you're signing off is like, have fun. I'm like, alright.

• 1:25:33Speaker 01

  You know, ain't nothing in there, bro. Release the second tranche of Epstein files with all your homies. And you're up in that shit. Release that. Release the unredacted Epstein files. That's what we wanna see. We wanna see UFOs.

• 1:25:45Speaker 03

  But what about this? You're not convinced when you look at this? What is that, dude?

• 1:25:50Speaker 01

  It's a plane, bro.

• 1:25:51Speaker 03

  Alright, well, what about this one? Oh, that's a little weird, no?

• 1:25:55Speaker 01

  It's a blimp.

• 1:25:56Speaker 03

  Alright, well, what about this one? This one's even crazier. Look at this.

• 1:25:59Mark Gagnon?

  It's AI.

• 1:26:00Speaker 03

  Oh, aliens?

• 1:26:03Speaker 01

  Anyway, go on.

• 1:26:06Speaker 03

  Alright, they found a, allegedly, a suicide note from Epstein.

• 1:26:11Speaker 01

  You gotta read this suicide note. Read the suicide note and tell me.

• 1:26:14Speaker 03

  Let me pull it up, let me pull it up.

• 1:26:15Speaker 01

  You read the suicide note and tell me that Trump didn't write it himself.

• 1:26:21Speaker 01

  I defy you to read the suicide note and tell me that this isn't exactly Trump's way of speaking.

• 1:26:30Speaker 03

  So it says this, "They investigated me for a month, found nothing, so 15-year-old charges resulted.

• 1:26:40Speaker 03

  It's a treat to be able to choose when you say goodbye. What you want me to do? Bust out crying? No fun, underlined, not worth it."

• 1:26:50Speaker 03

  That's, this is what.

• 1:26:51Mark Gagnon?

  But I heard there was like, other emails where he said similar.

• 1:26:54Speaker 01

  Yeah, but like, you don't think that they went through the emails and were like, hey, grab a few things he says regularly, and then we'll write some bullshit-ass note that justifies that he killed himself?

• 1:27:03Mark Gagnon?

  This administration, they do stupid shit. They don't like, that sounds like.

• 1:27:08Speaker 01

  That's stupid.

• 1:27:09Mark Gagnon?

  No, but that sounds like the logical thing.

• 1:27:10Speaker 01

  He wrote it in his own voice. Read it. I mean, I'm so like, we don't have to do Trump accents anymore, but like, read it in his, in his voice. Do you have the actual writing?

• 1:27:22Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is the actual note.

• 1:27:23Speaker 01

  I think no one can read that chicken scratch. Let me see if I can find the actual words that he says.

• 1:27:28Speaker 03

  It's all broken up in this article.

• 1:27:30Speaker 01

  I don't know, they don't understand how to do media. And so, I got it right here. Oh God, I can't believe I'm gonna do a fucking Trump accent. Uh, I'm not gonna do a Trump accent, but I'll do the donation of it. They investigated me for months, found nothing. It's a treat to be able to choose one's time to say goodbye. What you want me to do? Bust out crying? No fun, not worth it. Kill himself.

• 1:27:57Speaker 03

  Thank you for attention to this matter.

• 1:27:59Speaker 01

  Thank you for attention. It's just, that's a Trump tweet, right there. So they just find some stuff in the emails, like make it look like it.

• 1:28:05Speaker 03

  Now, people have pointed this where they're like, this is an actual Epstein letter that he wrote to someone. And they're like, look at all the Ts, look at how he writes.

• 1:28:12Speaker 01

  Yeah, but you could use AI to recreate all this shit.

• 1:28:14Speaker 03

  But then they look at his writing here and they're like, this doesn't look like his writing at all.

• 1:28:18Speaker 01

  Yeah, cuz it's not. It's Cash Patel and his fucking eye trying to stay on the line. There's the guys, this is such fucking, I can't believe we're even, I understand why we're entertaining this, but like, I can't believe anybody believes it. Like what the whole thing is, not the whole thing, but a big part of what this is hinging on is that he actually killed himself. Right? Like they're, they're going, eh, nothing, there's no foul play here, even though there's tons of foul play. But look, there's proof right here. He has this thing where he says goodbye.

• 1:28:46Speaker 03

  And it helps the powers that be to be like, yeah, he's gone, he killed himself.

• 1:28:49Speaker 01

  You know, they're basically, exactly. They're saying, get over it. We not getting over it, bro. Someone gotta get arrested.

• 1:28:54Speaker 03

  I will say, I do think it's possible Epstein wrote it. It just doesn't read to me like a suicide note. Like he doesn't say goodbye to anyone. He doesn't say like, to my friends, to my family, I love, like nothing like that. He's just like, jail sucks. There was another note purportedly attributed to Epstein that was also found that basically is just like him recounting his time in prison. He's like, was in a shower locked for an hour, bugs crawling across my hands, no fun, not worth it.

• 1:29:20Speaker 01

  It is a, it's, I mean, it's not funny, but it is that, uh, so far, the only person that's been arrested in the entire Epstein case in the United States of America is a woman. It's so absurd that it's funny. Like, it's horrible. Like, I mean, just points out that this is absolutely horrible. But there's a pedophile ring that they're obviously like keeping under wraps.

• 1:29:49Speaker 03

  The most powerful men in this country are abusing children in a systematic manner. And you know who's gonna pay for it?

• 1:29:55Speaker 01

  The one woman involved is the only one locked up. It's insane, right? It is, it's like, I'm shocked that all like the feminist blogs aren't talking about this nonstop.

• 1:30:06Speaker 03

  Like, it's a tough old day.

• 1:30:07Speaker 01

  Yeah, I know. It's like, cause you also gotta be like. Free Galen. No, don't say free it, but like, how is this the only person arrested? The girl?

• 1:30:15Speaker 03

  Yeah. Yeah, I mean, if Epstein did get arrested. Yeah. But then he broke out.

• 1:30:22Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:30:23Speaker 03

  But then he went on the run.

• 1:30:24Speaker 01

  Technically, the only person, cause was Galen convicted?

• 1:30:28Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:30:29Speaker 01

  So the only person convicted in the entire operation.

• 1:30:33Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 1:30:34Speaker 01

  Abroad and here.

• 1:30:35Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:30:36Speaker 01

  Is a woman. Like, how is, like, that's an insane stat.

• 1:30:41Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:30:41Speaker 01

  As someone who does not like to enable people who talk about how sexist the world is. We've reached a rock and a hard place or something like that. Like, this seems blatantly sexist.

• 1:30:55Speaker 03

  Yeah. Yeah, it's, it's.

• 1:30:57Speaker 01

  Not one person convicted besides the woman involved.

• 1:31:03Mark Gagnon?

  This is what happens when you have a girl, man.

• 1:31:05Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:31:06Mark Gagnon?

  Soft as you are, bro.

• 1:31:07Speaker 01

  It does. But that is crazy.

• 1:31:10Mark Gagnon?

  Nah, it is nuts.

• 1:31:11Speaker 01

  And she should be convicted.

• 1:31:12Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:31:13Speaker 01

  But there must have been somebody else we could convict too.

• 1:31:16Speaker 03

  Yeah. All the other dudes are also better at offing themselves. You know what I mean? John Brunel offs himself.

• 1:31:22Mark Gagnon?

  Oh, that's true.

• 1:31:23Speaker 01

  What?

• 1:31:23Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah, women aren't as good as.

• 1:31:25Speaker 01

  At suicide.

• 1:31:26Mark Gagnon?

  At suicide, yeah.

• 1:31:27Speaker 01

  That is a good point. It's cause they can't make up their minds.

• 1:31:31Speaker 03

  Like, what am I gonna eat? Which one is it? I don't know what to eat.

• 1:31:34Speaker 01

  They're ruminating back and forth. Do I wanna live? Do I wanna die? Do I wanna hang? Do I wanna shoot myself? Do I wanna, you know, it's like, they can't make up their fucking minds. So you end up in jail locked up. She's just locked up, walking around the yard.

• 1:31:46Speaker 03

  Yeah. Apparently, she's having a great time, according to people on the inside.

• 1:31:49Speaker 01

  What are they saying?

• 1:31:50Speaker 03

  They're saying that she's like in a very nice prison. People are taking care of her.

• 1:31:54Mark Gagnon?

  She gets to play with puppies.

• 1:31:55Speaker 03

  Yeah. She's doing like therapy with dogs, trying to reintegrate back into society, so.

• 1:32:01Mark Gagnon?

  Sounds like my wife.

• 1:32:06Speaker 03

  Just lock inside of the dog.

• 1:32:13Speaker 03

  So yeah, justice won't be served.

• 1:32:15Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah, that shit is crazy. They really gonna get away with this shit.

• 1:32:20Speaker 01

  They, they fucking might get away with this shit. They need to lock up Malphite too, that's another one.

• 1:32:26Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:32:27Speaker 01

  I did that so poorly. I did that so poorly.

• 1:32:33Speaker 03

  I almost bit him in the neck. Oh, that would have made me so happy.

• 1:32:37Speaker 01

  So bad. I was trying to tie it together and then...

• 1:32:40Speaker 03

  Got me on Iliad. Okay, more feelings, no facts?

• 1:32:42Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 1:32:42Speaker 03

  Strickland beats Hamzah.

• 1:32:44Speaker 01

  What a fight.

• 1:32:45Speaker 03

  Crazy.

• 1:32:45Speaker 01

  Also, the fight before that, Joshua Van versus Mayor of Arcadia. Unbelievable, dude. The fight, those two fights were fantastic. And, but the Joshua Van, I think his name is Tauro or something, Tyro? He was unbelievable.

• 1:33:03Mark Gagnon?

  I didn't even see him, but...

• 1:33:04Speaker 01

  Then Strickland beating Hamzah.

• 1:33:06Speaker 03

  Ted Zorro Tyro?

• 1:33:07Speaker 01

  Tyro, yeah. Was fucking incredible.

• 1:33:12Mark Gagnon?

  There was a lot of shit talking, like real shit talking leading up to this one, right?

• 1:33:15Speaker 01

  And then they were like really cordial with one another afterwards. Like Hamzah put the belt around him. Strickland goes and apologizes. You know, like, Strickland's a fascinating character. Like, I mean, this fight was just...

• 1:33:32Mark Gagnon?

  Oh wow, Strickland put on some size.

• 1:33:35Speaker 01

  So Strickland's big, dude.

• 1:33:37Mark Gagnon?

  But like, he looks even...

• 1:33:38Speaker 01

  And Hamzah couldn't, I mean, Hamzah kept him down, I think it was the first round. And, but he couldn't really do any damage or anything. And then Strickland in the second round blocks a takedown and then Hamzah gives up, he, what's called pulls guard, so he essentially goes on his back, like almost walks him. I don't know if I've ever seen Hamzah do that in MMA. Like, not a single fight where he just rolls on his back. And...

• 1:34:05Speaker 01

  In that moment, you're going, what the fuck is happening over here? Does he lack confidence? Is he tired? Like, what's going on? Then Hamza kind of comes back in the fourth. So it was up to the fifth round. Like, it was a, it was an awesome fight. And these guys are warriors. And yeah.

• 1:34:19Mark Gagnon?

  But Hamza wasn't trying to take him down the whole fight?

• 1:34:22Speaker 01

  I think Strickland created a scenario where Hamza realized, like, I'm gonna gas myself out trying to take you down, and I'm not gonna be effective after I take you down. So Strickland does this fucking amazing thing where he makes you, when he's at his best, he makes you fight his fight. He blocks leg kicks really well, and eventually you stop throwing the kicks because you're like, it hurts when we're going shit on shit. And his competitive advantage is when you guys are standing up and you are punching each other. And he found a way where he's like, I don't need to take this to the ground. What I need you to do is think you can't be effective on the ground. I don't need to exchange kicks with you. What I need you to do is not want to kick me anymore. So he punishes you for doing the things you're

• 1:35:07Speaker 01

  good at, and then forces you to fight him the way that he's good.

• 1:35:11Mark Gagnon?

  Oh, okay.

• 1:35:12Speaker 01

  And, and then he has just this, like, amazing, like, piston jab. And it was just awesome. Like, the fight was fucking awesome.

• 1:35:20Speaker 03

  Is it good for the weight class to see Strickland?

• 1:35:24Speaker 01

  I think, I think it's always good to have a American fighter be a belt holder, especially like a wild one. I know people will hate the certain things that he said, etc. Like, I mean, bro, his nose is completely busted up, like, broken and just fucking massive and swollen. And he looks at himself and he sees himself in like a reflection of something. He was like, oh, my God, I look like I work for AIPAC. So like, there's gonna be things that he says that rock people up. But you have to understand, like, this is fight sports where these guys go out there and they try to kill each other. You know what I mean? Like, they say insane shit to people. Like, this is, you won't talk about, like, the roast being insane stuff. These guys are saying insane stuff before they go out there and

• 1:36:09Speaker 01

  potentially lose their life or take someone's life. And that's not hyperbole. That happens sometimes in this sport. So I'm not saying that like everything they say is okay, but it is a very, when you're fighting somebody for your life, you will speak very differently about them and to them than you will outside of that. And it's gonna elicit all these emotions. It's gonna seem like I'm justifying the things he said, whatever. You don't care what you want to say. What I'm saying is until you're in that scenario, I don't, you don't know how you would really act.

• 1:36:41Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah.

• 1:36:42Speaker 01

  And the reality is when these fights do get hyped up in that way, there's more interest and these guys make more money. Now, you could start to, you know, be critical of that, be like, well, is it worth making the money? It's like, all right, well, you're not putting your life on the line every time you go on the fucking ring. And the market decides, we are more invested when the guys fucking hate each other.

• 1:37:00Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah, right.

• 1:37:01Speaker 01

  When the guys are super pleasant and like, let's shake hands and let's hug and kiss before a fight, we don't care as much.

• 1:37:05Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah, that's honestly the only thing I heard about this was the shit.

• 1:37:09Speaker 01

  The buildup. And the buildup was crazy.

• 1:37:12Speaker 03

  People have criticized like the grapplers and they're like, oh, these grapplers, like they make the fights boring.

• 1:37:17Speaker 01

  Yeah, it is. It is for the, for a casual fan, it is boring. It is. It's like, I understand if you're a grappler and you've dedicated your life to that, that's super interesting to you because it's incredibly technical and like each tiny move is setting up another move and that's great.

• 1:37:31Speaker 03

  And the point is to win.

• 1:37:32Speaker 01

  And they win. And they win. But what the casual fan likes is carnage and fisticuffs and kicks. They really kind of want a kickboxing match that can also go to the ground. That's kind of what the casual fan really appreciates. So like having someone who's gonna go out there and swing is, is what they want. And like the people that have done that at the highest level are the people that probably have made the most money. Like, you know, Connor just knocking people out is really fun to watch. The heavyweights just going bang and knocking people out, fun to watch. The guys kind of wrestling or the guys, you know, grappling, it's, they're just not gonna be as big stars.

• 1:38:09Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah. That bare knuckle fighting shit that you was watching when they're biting people's does off, like cannot ever be.

• 1:38:16Mark Gagnon?

  Sanctioned?

• 1:38:17Speaker 01

  Well, I think they do it bare knuckles. So the BKFC is the bare knuckle league?

• 1:38:22Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah, but with the Biden, like all the shit, like everything goes. Why is there just, it should just be one fight league where anything goes.

• 1:38:29Speaker 01

  I mean, they have these like.

• 1:38:30Speaker 03

  You're describing Rome right now.

• 1:38:32Speaker 01

  No, it's not even, it's not even Rome. There is one. There are these underground fights. Fuck, I'm forgetting the name. You guys probably seen it where like the guys, they fight in like a parking lot or like an alley or something like that. And these guys that organize it, all the organizers wear masks and they have their like, I think they might even have their like voices fucked up or whatever. And they're like, it's like an illegal fight ring and they just pay guys who want to do it. You can gouge eyes. Like you literally see guys pushing each other's eyeballs into their heads.

• 1:39:01Speaker 03

  Damn.

• 1:39:02Speaker 01

  And you see it, I don't know how it's available on YouTube, but I watch it on fucking social media.

• 1:39:06Mark Gagnon?

  Get the fuck out of here. Oh, wow. Yeah, that's, that's.

• 1:39:10Speaker 01

  So that does exist and that's the most gnarly version of it.

• 1:39:12Speaker 03

  Hmm. Maybe I'm getting too soft. That sounds, that sounds.

• 1:39:16Speaker 01

  No, it's hard to, it's hard to watch, but I watch.

• 1:39:19Mark Gagnon?

  Just follow it with some cocoa melon.

• 1:39:22Speaker 03

  Yeah, wash it down.

• 1:39:23Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:39:25Speaker 03

  Well, any, any closing thoughts? Anything you want to say about Coca Melon or the roast or the Knicks or Haunt of Virus?

• 1:39:33Speaker 01

  Just good vibes for the Knicks, guys. Just good vibes.

• 1:39:38Mark Gagnon?

  Good vibes.

• 1:39:39Speaker 01

  All we want is good vibes for the Knicks. Okay? Congratulations to Sean on that amazing victory.

• 1:39:47Speaker 01

  Uh, Haunt of Virus, you gotta keep them on the ship, man. I really, really, really feel strongly about that. I do.

• 1:39:57Speaker 03

  And film it. Turn it to reality show.

• 1:40:00Speaker 01

  Honestly.

• 1:40:00Speaker 03

  Streaming on Bravo. Right?

• 1:40:03Mark Gagnon?

  I'd watch that.

• 1:40:03Speaker 03

  Right?

• 1:40:04Mark Gagnon?

  Yeah.

• 1:40:05Speaker 01

  We should do a traitors.

• 1:40:08Speaker 01

  With just Chinese people. And you gotta pick out.

• 1:40:13Speaker 03

  Which mayor?

• 1:40:14Speaker 01

  Which mayor or which Olympic skier, whatever, like you gotta pick out which ones are actually loyal to United States of America and which ones are working for China.

• 1:40:23Mark Gagnon?

  I like this idea.

• 1:40:24Speaker 03

  Yeah, that's pretty good.

• 1:40:25Speaker 01

  This is a.

• 1:40:26Speaker 03

  That's honestly pretty good. And they're all on a boat.

• 1:40:29Speaker 01

  Let's not get too crazy.

• 1:40:30Speaker 03

  And one person has the virus.

• 1:40:31Speaker 01

  You're adding a lot of elements to this right now.

• 1:40:36Speaker 03

  It's layered, super layered.

• 1:40:37Speaker 01

  It is layered.

• 1:40:38Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:40:39Speaker 01

  It is layered.

• 1:40:40Speaker 03

  And then UFO files, hopefully we get the, you know, proof that there's aliens.

• 1:40:43Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:40:44Speaker 03

  And then the roast, I hope we do more.

• 1:40:47Speaker 01

  Yeah, the roasts are fantastic. Congratulations, everybody who crushed on the roast, you gave me unbelievable FOMO. And, uh, and keep killing it. Yeah, I think we just need more roasts. I also like the idea of like every other year. Cause they didn't do one last year. You know what I mean? Like spacing them out is kinda nice too, cause it feels like an event. If it's too regular, I feel like you kinda get used to it. Also like roast jokes kinda start to sound similar. You know, so just like spacing out a little bit so we forget, we miss it and then fucking bang. And now you've got two years to get, you know, Tiger to do it or somebody else to do it. I like that. I like that. Like the Olympics is great, so every four years, the World Cup is great, so every four years.

• 1:41:32Speaker 01

  You could even go every four years.

• 1:41:35Speaker 03

  Yo, an inter-country roast. You get one comment from every country.

• 1:41:40Mark Gagnon?

  We don't give a fuck about them.

• 1:41:41Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:41:42Mark Gagnon?

  Come on.

• 1:41:43Speaker 01

  I don't wanna fuck with that.

• 1:41:44Speaker 03

  What if we got Eileen?

• 1:41:46Speaker 01

  Why would you even try?

• 1:41:48Speaker 03

  Eileen Wang, Eileen Wang, the mayor.

• 1:41:50Speaker 01

  Why would you even try the joke we did already?

• 1:41:53Speaker 03

  He's so mad he got caught. That's just so dumb, it's not fair.

• 1:41:56Speaker 01

  Yo, we love you, we appreciate you, we see you on Patreon, peace.

• 1:41:59Speaker 06

  Now, more than ever, we need someone on our side, but Rob Whitman? Whitman's votes drove up costs, cut Medicaid and risked 350,000 Virginians healthcare to pay for tax breaks for himself and his donors. He's not on our side. Shannon Taylor will fight corruption, cut taxes and bring down costs. This November, vote for Shannon Taylor. She's for us. Paid for by HMP, the House Majority PAC dot com, not authorized by any candidate or candidate's committee.

• 1:42:29Speaker 03

  Get your business ready for clients faster with Base44. Describe what you need in your own words, and build the website and software behind it, with database, login, backend, and hosting included. Go to base44.com.