Weaponised Girl Dinner | The Suffragettes (Part 1)

Introducing The Suffragettes, AKA the first annoying women. The Suffragettes (Part One)   This episode of Fin vs History is brought to you by Surfshark. Secure your privacy with Surfshark! Enter coupon code FVH for an extra 4 months at https://surfshark.com/fvh The show for people who like history but don't care what actually happened.  The show for people who like history but don't care what actually happened.  For weekly bonus episodes, ad-free listening and early access to series, become a Truther and sign up to the Patreon ⁠⁠⁠https://www.patreon.com/fintaylor⁠⁠ Link to our merch here: ⁠fumblerooskiproductions.com/store⁠ Chapters: 00:00 - Fannyban 05:33 - You Can’t Imprison Your Wife? 07:47 - Stand Up! 10:34 - The First Fanny 16:38 - Awoo!! 20:46 - Spit On That Thang 23:55 - I Paid For Everything 28:02 - Weaponising Girl Dinner 32:48 - Jumped Off? 37:21 - Jiu Jitsu 39:54 - Bit Burpy 46:55 - Male Suffragettes 51:06 - Emily Spankhurst Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

• 0:00Speaker 00

  It is a sad day for our movement, but her brave sacrifice, it shows that we are willing to lay our lives down on the line and it only makes our determination for women's suffrage even stronger. Thank you. No more questions.

• 0:16Speaker 01

  Well, I don't know. Personally, I think you should keep politics out of horse racing.

• 0:20Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's just virtue signaling. You know, people come to the horse races to escape politics.

• 0:24Speaker 01

  Yeah, to watch horses running. I mean, I've been training all year for this. I was having a really good race and some mad bin runs out in front of me and I don't know what she's trying to say.

• 0:32Speaker 02

  Well, when a lesbian runs towards a horse, you're thinking, oh, you know what she wants.

• 0:34Speaker 01

  Yeah, she wants that big, big fucking juicy horse cock. And I'm like, do you mind? I'm at work here. Do you know what I mean? It's a time of the play. You know, I'll sign your tits afterwards.

• 0:42Speaker 02

  Yeah, you chose not to get ticked down by humans. Doesn't mean you can have a fucking ride on my thing.

• 0:45Speaker 01

  Well, I mean, I'm not interested in some mucky lesbian at the front. I'm being ridden by an Irish bloke up top. No, I don't know. I'm annoyed. I'm annoyed. I'm annoyed.

• 0:51Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 0:54Speaker 01

  Sorry. Sorry. Sorry.

• 0:55Speaker 02

  And then we've got him fucking carrots.

• 0:56Speaker 01

  Yeah, I'd kill for a carrot.

• 1:10Speaker 01

  Welcome back to Finn vs. History. Joining me is Horatio Gould.

• 1:15Speaker 01

  Today, we're talking about the suffrage. Aww. Aww. It's Edwardian whining and dining.

• 1:23Speaker 02

  Yep. It's one of the most successful winjas of all time, to be honest.

• 1:26Speaker 01

  I'd say so. I'd say so. It's amazing what you can get done if you just be annoying for a decade.

• 1:34Speaker 02

  Turns out their experts are being annoying.

• 1:36Speaker 01

  My god. I mean, and also, I did not realise before researching this topic, researching this topic, you know, spitefully, the vote that women now enjoy, and I'd say waste as well.

• 1:49Speaker 02

  Yes, frivolous.

• 1:50Speaker 01

  Is built on the backs of terrorism.

• 1:53Speaker 02

  Yeah, 100%.

• 1:54Speaker 01

  I did not know that.

• 1:54Speaker 02

  No, yeah, these guys are domestic terrorists.

• 1:56Speaker 01

  They are. They are. The titty ban. The fanny ban.

• 2:00Speaker 02

  Yeah, I mean, Emily in Pankhurst, I call her Osama Bin Laden more like.

• 2:04Speaker 01

  Exactly. It's a very sad story, this. It's a fight that ultimately we lose.

• 2:12Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 2:13Speaker 01

  But it's a cautionary tale for whenever the issue of suffrage comes up, rears its ugly head, as it will continue to do so. It's a cautionary tale to keep it as it, actually.

• 2:23Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 2:24Speaker 01

  And more votes does not mean better outcomes.

• 2:27Speaker 02

  Well, I think we should have a referendum.

• 2:29Speaker 01

  On female suffrage. I could, sex it. I would 100, I'd be 100% in favour of sex it.

• 2:37Speaker 02

  Women can't vote in that because they'd be biased.

• 2:39Speaker 01

  No, exactly. Exactly.

• 2:40Speaker 02

  Yeah, it would just completely ruin the vote.

• 2:42Speaker 01

  And non-binaries can't either. Sneaky. Sneaky.

• 2:45Speaker 02

  Jerry Mandering.

• 2:46Speaker 01

  That is Jerry Mandering. Jerry Mandering, who, by the way, is a non-binary.

• 2:51Speaker 02

  No, Jane Mandering.

• 2:51Speaker 01

  Jane Mandering, yeah. I guess Jerry works both ways, though, doesn't it?

• 2:55Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:55Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:56Speaker 02

  Is it?

• 2:56Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:57Speaker 02

  Jerry.

• 2:57Speaker 01

  Jerry Adams and Jerry Hall.

• 2:59Speaker 02

  Jerry Hallaway.

• 2:59Speaker 01

  Jerry Hallwell.

• 3:00Speaker 02

  Yeah, you're right.

• 3:00Speaker 01

  Exactly.

• 3:01Speaker 02

  Hello.

• 3:01Speaker 01

  Let's just deal with a little whistle-stop tour of women's rights up until the terrorism begins.

• 3:08Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 3:08Speaker 01

  At the dawn of the 20th century, women had, well, they'd had quite a lot, to be fair to them.

• 3:15Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 3:15Speaker 01

  In 1848.

• 3:16Speaker 02

  They went back for seconds at the breakfast buffet. You've already had a lot, Laura.

• 3:21Speaker 01

  It's bottomless brunch, isn't it? They don't know when to stop.

• 3:26Speaker 02

  Because right now, they're the one behind the sofa, aren't they?

• 3:29Speaker 01

  Yes, they are. Yeah. They're upside down behind the sofa. That's what we're in today. And they had an opportunity to just have some breakfast and get on with their day.

• 3:37Speaker 02

  Right. A female researcher, who's, I think, secretly a terrorist, has said, though in 1848 they had access to university education, they didn't get degrees, which feels like a nice balance.

• 3:46Speaker 01

  No, no, hang on. It's not up to, just because you go to university doesn't mean you're good enough to get a degree. If they never got a degree, that's because they're stupid.

• 3:53Speaker 02

  Right.

• 3:54Speaker 01

  And it's an argument against them.

• 3:55Speaker 02

  Into meritocracy.

• 3:56Speaker 01

  Yes, it is. It's the free market, okay? If you don't get a degree, that's not the university's fault, all right? Just because you're allowed in doesn't mean that you get a degree. Just as nowadays, you know, women are allowed to drive, doesn't mean they can.

• 4:10Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 4:10Speaker 01

  So, in 1878, they finally are being able to, the first woman gets a degree. That's how I'm going to phrase that.

• 4:16Speaker 02

  Right.

• 4:17Speaker 01

  The first woman gets a degree. 30 years.

• 4:19Speaker 02

  Must be a lesbian, just to be the first one.

• 4:22Speaker 01

  Charlie, can we find out who is the first woman to get a higher education degree in 1878?

• 4:26Speaker 02

  Well, I just mean, if you're transitioning, the first one to do it, you have to start the lesbians before you come to straight women.

• 4:32Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 4:32Speaker 02

  Because you have to fade it.

• 4:33Speaker 01

  Oh, don't get me wrong. I think lesbians should have the vote. I 100% think lesbians should have the vote.

• 4:39Speaker 02

  They should also be on the front lines in the British Army.

• 4:42Speaker 01

  Yes. Yeah, exactly. They should also be flying all planes.

• 4:46Speaker 02

  Would you feel all right if you went into, like, an easy jet flight and there was a lesbian flying?

• 4:51Speaker 01

  It's Captain Balding speaking. Good evening. Welcome all to this easy jet flight. I would be, I would feel safe as houses if Captain Balding comes on.

• 4:59Speaker 02

  Yeah, the butcher lesbian, femme lesbian, it's getting a bit touch and go.

• 5:03Speaker 01

  A butcher lesbian flying a plane, I know exactly, I know I'm.

• 5:06Speaker 02

  With a policeman's haircut.

• 5:07Speaker 01

  Yeah, we're landing safely. But I want a gay man to serve me drinks.

• 5:12Speaker 02

  Yeah, of course.

• 5:13Speaker 01

  Because I want to forget about the seriousness of flying and I want the frivolity of a camp man to serve me a gin and tonic to make me think that I'm at gay pride in the sky.

• 5:22Speaker 02

  Yeah. A disaster, gay man flying a plane, lesbian as a hostess.

• 5:25Speaker 01

  The worst of all worlds.

• 5:27Speaker 02

  He's checking grinder.

• 5:29Speaker 01

  Woo! Luke loops and then you get, here you go, mate, there's some crisps.

• 5:35Speaker 01

  No. Captain Balding, Captain Balding.

• 5:38Speaker 02

  Here you go, mate.

• 5:40Speaker 01

  Captain Balding, First Officer Winton, okay? That's what I would like on the plane. Perfect setup. Charlie, what have you found? Mary Eliza Lister, the first university of degree.

• 5:52Speaker 02

  Yeah, she looks dour.

• 5:53Speaker 01

  What was the degree in? What was the degree in?

• 5:55Speaker 02

  Muff diving, I imagine. Is that a Bachelor of Arts or Sciences?

• 5:59Speaker 01

  Sciences. 100%. It's BSc. Muff diving. BSc. It's not an art, muff diving. It is a science.

• 6:09Speaker 02

  And back in those days, they would have had those massive head things to go down there.

• 6:13Speaker 01

  Jacques Cousteau, 40,000 leagues under the muff. Yeah. No, muff diving's a science because you have to really stick at it and it's about persistence.

• 6:21Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 6:21Speaker 01

  And the more creative you are, actually, the worse it is.

• 6:23Speaker 02

  Yes, it's true. It's mechanical. It's consistent.

• 6:26Speaker 01

  Rick Stanton's an excellent muff diver.

• 6:27Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 6:28Speaker 01

  Okay? He's getting the job done.

• 6:29Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 6:29Speaker 01

  So Mary Lister is the first woman to get a degree. It took her 30 years because she found it tough, all right? Oxford refuses women degrees until 1920, Cambridge until 48. So they're allowed to go to university, yeah, but you can't graduate.

• 6:46Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 6:46Speaker 01

  Because that would be mad.

• 6:47Speaker 02

  Yeah, because then you could maybe get a high-paying job or something.

• 6:50Speaker 01

  In 1857, civil divorce was allowed if adultery was proved or another serious offence, which I guess is what would be murder.

• 6:59Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 6:59Speaker 01

  In 1882.

• 7:01Speaker 02

  So they're allowed to be divorced if they're murdered by their husband?

• 7:03Speaker 01

  Yes. Yeah. I think that's fair. Yeah. No, you qualify for divorce. In 1882, and I think this is probably the beginning of the end.

• 7:14Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 7:14Speaker 01

  Women, married women, could own, buy and sell property, sue and be sued in their own name.

• 7:22Speaker 02

  Right.

• 7:22Speaker 01

  I think that's the beginning of the end.

• 7:23Speaker 02

  So this is Selling Sunset sort of stuff?

• 7:25Speaker 01

  Yes, because before this, women's legal identity was with their husbands.

• 7:28Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 7:28Speaker 01

  They emerged.

• 7:29Speaker 02

  Well, yeah, they're part of the property.

• 7:30Speaker 01

  Yes, exactly. They're part of the estate.

• 7:32Speaker 02

  It's sort of like your fridge being able to sell your house.

• 7:34Speaker 01

  Well, exactly. Who's getting the fridge in the will? In 1891, R V Jackson, kind of R. Roe v. Wade, if you will, the courts ruled that a husband could not imprison his wife.

• 7:45Speaker 02

  Right, really? Is this a big, is this like a famous?

• 7:48Speaker 01

  Can a man not replace his fridge, you know? And then by 1894.

• 7:53Speaker 02

  So husbands can't imprison their wives?

• 7:55Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 7:55Speaker 02

  What does that mean, in the home, for like a naughty step?

• 7:58Speaker 01

  No, I think it's that a man.

• 8:00Speaker 02

  You can't lock your wife in a cage?

• 8:01Speaker 01

  Violently abduct or detain his wife simply to enforce the marriage.

• 8:04Speaker 02

  Oh, I see. So before that was completely legal?

• 8:07Speaker 01

  Yes. That's just marriage, isn't it? You know, come on, suck up and just take him, love.

• 8:11Speaker 02

  So they're being hysterical. You throw him over your shoulder, they're kicking and screaming, you chuck him in a cage.

• 8:16Speaker 01

  It's called marriage, love, all right? It's tough. Yeah? It's about compromise. You have to compromise being imprisoned. This is old common law. So if she refused to live with him, so if she said no to the engagement, you could just sort of fire him and lift her into the house.

• 8:30Speaker 02

  Right.

• 8:31Speaker 01

  I mean, you recently got engaged.

• 8:32Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 8:33Speaker 01

  Did you think she'd say no at any point?

• 8:34Speaker 02

  Well, she had said no and she's in the basement at the moment and I'm waiting for her to cool down because she's completely hysterical.

• 8:40Speaker 01

  Yes, well, she would be.

• 8:41Speaker 02

  We've got two weeks and I'm hoping that she'll change her mind.

• 8:44Speaker 01

  So by 1894, women could vote in county council, parish and district council elections and they also paid tax.

• 8:51Speaker 02

  Did they, though?

• 8:52Speaker 01

  Yes. What are they earning?

• 8:53Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 8:53Speaker 01

  What's the tax from? Where are they getting that? So anyway.

• 8:58Speaker 02

  That's what I'd be saying. If I was a tax collector, I'd be like, well, where have you got that from?

• 9:01Speaker 01

  Where's this money from? Are you dealing drugs? You can't work. Now, let's just get into the arguments against women's suffrage, okay?

• 9:11Speaker 02

  Okay. We'll touch on these.

• 9:14Speaker 01

  Well, no. I mean, I know it's kind of stating the obvious, but we should, just for people who aren't aware of the history.

• 9:21Speaker 02

  Yeah, okay.

• 9:21Speaker 01

  The first argument is that it would, two words, racial suicide.

• 9:26Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 9:28Speaker 01

  And that the vote would lead to declining birth rates and the white race would die out.

• 9:32Speaker 02

  I mean, this is your favourite period of history.

• 9:35Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 9:35Speaker 02

  I imagine a kind of a newspaper columnist, it's never been spicier headlines maybe than right now.

• 9:42Speaker 01

  Should, yeah, yeah. Why, women shouldn't vote racial suicide. That was a headline in 1900. The colonies wouldn't respect Britain if women were given the vote. I think that's a fair, there's a sound, there's a sound argument.

• 9:54Speaker 02

  I mean, a lot of former colonies don't respect Britain because of the way we treat women.

• 9:57Speaker 01

  I think it's the beginning of the end for the empire, to be honest.

• 9:59Speaker 02

  Yeah, because a lot of people come over here and they'll come from a war-torn country.

• 10:03Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 10:04Speaker 02

  And they'll come economically to the UK and they'll arrive here and be like, this is a fucking.

• 10:08Speaker 01

  What do you mean I can't cut my wife's clit off? What do you mean? They can vote.

• 10:13Speaker 02

  And you say we're backward.

• 10:17Speaker 01

  Where the fuck am I?

• 10:18Speaker 02

  I've come from a civil war, I had to be here, but this is a fucking disgrace.

• 10:21Speaker 01

  I've brought my fucking clip machete, what do you mean I can't use it? I had to smuggle that through customs. You mean I can't use it here? What is this, some bongo bongo land? Listener, this episode of Finn vs History is brought to you by Surfshark.

• 10:34Speaker 02

  What more can we say about our friends at Surfshark that we already have?

• 10:39Speaker 01

  They are the lone brave salmon.

• 10:42Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 10:43Speaker 01

  Who are sponsoring this podcast.

• 10:44Speaker 02

  The unsponsable podcast, they said.

• 10:47Speaker 01

  Not Surfshark.

• 10:48Speaker 02

  The people who provide the best virtual pussy networks in the entire country said no.

• 10:52Speaker 01

  No.

• 10:53Speaker 02

  They are sponsorable, I believe. The kind of people who are buying Surfshark are the same sort of people, good people who listen to Finvers History.

• 11:02Speaker 01

  Innocent men, innocent until proven guilty.

• 11:04Speaker 02

  Ignorant, thick.

• 11:05Speaker 01

  Ignorant until proven guilty.

• 11:06Speaker 02

  But good.

• 11:07Speaker 01

  They use VPNs because actually some of this show you need a VPN to watch.

• 11:12Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 11:12Speaker 01

  What is a VPN? Imagine you're Charlie and you spend your time Googling questions that you have no right to be bothering with, but you're worried, this stops you being a Charlie.

• 11:21Speaker 02

  Rate my poo.

• 11:22Speaker 01

  You're worried about coming across like a freak. This is where VPN comes in, okay? It protects your search history from your employer, from your spouse, from whoever.

• 11:33Speaker 02

  Now, we must stress the trauma that you have from what you searched. If that imprint's on your brain, if that changed your relationship to sex, to going to the toilet, to work, that VPNs can't help with.

• 11:44Speaker 01

  We can't help you with that.

• 11:45Speaker 02

  They never claim to.

• 11:46Speaker 01

  We can't help you with that. Do not come looking to us for liability over the fact you're a head case, all right? What you look at in your own home is none of my business, okay?

• 11:57Speaker 02

  Keep it to yourself.

• 11:58Speaker 01

  Keep it to yourself. Use Surfshark to help keep it to yourself. They have three and a half thousand servers in a hundred countries.

• 12:06Speaker 02

  A hundred countries.

• 12:07Speaker 01

  What does that mean? What does that mean? I do not know.

• 12:10Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 12:10Speaker 01

  I don't know. But all I know is that they're the only brand that sponsor us, and so I will die for them.

• 12:16Speaker 02

  You're a brave man, you're braver than me.

• 12:17Speaker 01

  I am, right? Yet again, I'm a lone salmon swimming upstream, right? Thirty day money back guarantee, risk free.

• 12:26Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 12:26Speaker 01

  God bless Surfshark and God save the king.

• 12:29Speaker 02

  Keep your data safe and we'll see you next time. Goodbye.

• 12:32Speaker 01

  They think that entering the political sphere would force women to un-sex themselves.

• 12:37Speaker 02

  Chivalry has died.

• 12:38Speaker 01

  Chivalry was, in a sense, it was a sort of framework for coping with inequality.

• 12:42Speaker 02

  It was an olive branch.

• 12:44Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 12:46Speaker 02

  The whole point of chivalry is like, you can't have anything, but will at least be nice to some.

• 12:52Speaker 01

  Please take my seat, yeah. But now, I would like to say, well, if you've got the vote, there should be no chivalry. So stand, get up and stand up.

• 13:00Speaker 02

  Because I do, there's a lot of arguments from women at the moment who miss chivalry.

• 13:04Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 13:05Speaker 02

  Where are all the chivalrous men?

• 13:06Speaker 01

  Well, hand in your badge. Hand over your badge and your gun, right? You're voting, right? And then they'll let you sit down.

• 13:12Speaker 02

  Yeah, you can't have both.

• 13:13Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 13:14Speaker 02

  You can't vote and also get my seat on the bus.

• 13:16Speaker 01

  If you want to be patronised, right?

• 13:18Speaker 02

  Let's do it.

• 13:18Speaker 01

  Then let's do it.

• 13:19Speaker 02

  Yeah, we're ready.

• 13:20Speaker 01

  We're ready, I'm ready, I'm ready for now, right? So, women, it was thought, and remember, this is science, okay?

• 13:28Speaker 02

  So this is 1887, this, right?

• 13:30Speaker 01

  Yes, so women were thought to be too emotional and to lack intellectual capacity. So evolutionary biologist, friend of the pod, Georges Roman.

• 13:37Speaker 02

  1887, yeah, this is peak.

• 13:39Speaker 01

  1887.

• 13:40Speaker 02

  This is right in the middle, this is Jack the Ripper's time.

• 13:42Speaker 01

  This is science, okay? Quote, "The average brain weight of women is about five ounces less than that of men. Her intellect is lower."

• 13:50Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 13:51Speaker 01

  That's science, okay? So we're talking about the weight of brains here.

• 13:53Speaker 02

  But there's just, but there's less brain to have thoughts in.

• 13:57Speaker 01

  Well, exactly, it's clear, it's obvious.

• 13:59Speaker 02

  You have less compartments in your brain to keep information.

• 14:02Speaker 01

  Yes. How much is five ounces in today's, in today's weight? About 142 grams.

• 14:09Speaker 02

  Right.

• 14:09Speaker 01

  And again, you know, weight is important when it comes to brain matter.

• 14:12Speaker 02

  It is.

• 14:13Speaker 01

  And with that comes the ability to make analytical judgements about political direction.

• 14:20Speaker 02

  Deciding what you want to eat for dinner, etc.

• 14:23Speaker 01

  Or deciding to eat dinner. If they had five ounces more weight, maybe they wouldn't just have some crisps and then go to bed sad.

• 14:31Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 14:32Speaker 01

  These are all the arguments against women's suffrage that were fairly clear and obvious to everyone alive at the time.

• 14:38Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 14:39Speaker 01

  Queen Victoria strongly opposed the idea, saying, quote, "Mad and wicked folly."

• 14:45Speaker 02

  Yeah, she's a woman of the age.

• 14:46Speaker 01

  So, you know, if she's saying it.

• 14:48Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 14:49Speaker 01

  In the late 18, I think, 90s, a woman called Millicent Fawcett, which, a terrific name.

• 14:56Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 14:56Speaker 01

  Millicent Fawcett.

• 14:59Speaker 02

  She sounds gorgeous.

• 15:00Speaker 01

  Yes. Shall we let the, there's a lot of rabbits for these dogs to see today. Can we let the dogs see the first rabbit?

• 15:05Speaker 02

  She's a page three girl, Millicent.

• 15:06Speaker 01

  Millicent. What's Millicent say about the Iran war? "I think we should have supported Trump by using the islands." Millicent Fawcett, yeah, stern, I'd say.

• 15:17Speaker 02

  Tough.

• 15:17Speaker 01

  Millicent's not a name you hear much nowadays, is it?

• 15:19Speaker 02

  Died.

• 15:20Speaker 01

  Lovely baby Millicent. She doesn't look unattractive, but she looks, she looks difficult.

• 15:26Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 15:26Speaker 01

  To check.

• 15:27Speaker 02

  A difficult woman.

• 15:28Speaker 01

  So she founds the Women's Suffrage Societies, the National Union of, in 1897. Essentially, the story of the campaign for women to vote is one of men going, eh eh eh eh.

• 15:44Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 15:46Speaker 01

  We'll get to it, you know, there's other stuff going on.

• 15:48Speaker 02

  There is other stuff going on though.

• 15:49Speaker 01

  It's bottom of the priority list.

• 15:50Speaker 02

  There's the Home Rule issue in Ireland.

• 15:52Speaker 01

  A huge issue, Home Rule.

• 15:53Speaker 02

  World War I's brewing.

• 15:54Speaker 01

  World War I's coming, I mean, you know, the Germans are militarising.

• 15:57Speaker 02

  Yeah, we'll get to it.

• 15:58Speaker 01

  We'll get to it in the minutes, stop nagging.

• 16:02Speaker 01

  You let me have some space for a second to just think and be.

• 16:06Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 16:06Speaker 01

  It's like, my fucking wife is planning the next holiday when we're on a holiday. And you're like, can you just enjoy this for a second?

• 16:12Speaker 02

  Can you just enjoy not having a vote?

• 16:14Speaker 01

  Yeah, please, can you just enjoy the privilege of not having to vote? You know, it's like looking at a homeless person, thinking, you don't know. You'd never have to worry about fucking bills or parking fines coming through the door. Or fucking Ule's, you don't have to worry about it.

• 16:29Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 16:30Speaker 01

  I'm always getting fucking letters through and they're always asking for money.

• 16:34Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 16:34Speaker 01

  From the government because I've spent.

• 16:36Speaker 02

  Yeah, and then the homeless guy, you just need to ask for money, you're the asker.

• 16:39Speaker 01

  Exactly. Anyway, in 1903, an extremist, Emmeline Pankhurst, founds the WSPU. We should place 1903, I think, this is the forming, the forming of the Fani ban.

• 16:55Speaker 02

  The Fani ban?

• 16:56Speaker 01

  Yes, the Fani ban.

• 16:57Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 16:58Speaker 01

  The jihadets, 1903. Have you got one, Charlie? Would you like to have a go?

• 17:02Speaker 03

  Is it after the forming of the Fani ban and before the forming of the Taliban?

• 17:08Speaker 01

  Well, I'm calling the suffragettes the Fani ban.

• 17:13Speaker 03

  So it's before the Fani ban, Fani ban?

• 17:15Speaker 01

  Well, no, it's not, it's, that is what we're placing, it's the formation of it.

• 17:20Speaker 03

  Okay, it's after the first Fanny.

• 17:25Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 17:27Speaker 01

  Phoebe, could you just find out when the first Fanny was, Charlie? So I don't want to, Charlie, no, you carry on, Charlie. So it's after the first Fanny, right?

• 17:34Speaker 02

  And before Bonnie Blue used it to its logical end point?

• 17:37Speaker 01

  Well, yeah, it's a long road to that, I suppose.

• 17:39Speaker 03

  And before Manny Tualangi?

• 17:41Speaker 02

  Oh, that's the rhyming thing again.

• 17:43Speaker 01

  Yeah, 300 million years B.C., we would think the first vagina emerges.

• 17:49Speaker 02

  Probably on some sort of fish-like creature.

• 17:51Speaker 01

  Yeah, out of a swamp emerges.

• 17:54Speaker 02

  The first Fanny.

• 17:55Speaker 01

  Yeah, the first Fanny. I imagine it's like a scallop.

• 17:57Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 17:57Speaker 01

  Or an oyster, hissing.

• 17:59Speaker 02

  I mean, it is the beginning of this story, to be fair.

• 18:01Speaker 01

  We should, do you know what? You're right, Charlie, we should start in a sort of lake in, I guess, Ethiopia.

• 18:08Speaker 02

  If I was doing a history film about the suffragettes, this is how I'd open the film.

• 18:17Speaker 01

  Yeah, and then a bloke, bloody hell, shut up, would you?

• 18:19Speaker 02

  No, it's just complete calm and bliss.

• 18:22Speaker 01

  And there's a bloke just sat there just meditating. And he's just staring, staring at space going, oh, this is beautiful. Isn't it great? And then

• 18:31Speaker 01

  this sort of Arabic fishy

• 18:34Speaker 01

  sea creature emerges. Fucking shut up, would you? Anyway, so that's 1903, and that is the birth of, let's have a look at Emmeline Pankhurst, another rabbit to see.

• 18:43Speaker 02

  She's got something about her.

• 18:44Speaker 01

  Hey?

• 18:44Speaker 02

  She's got something about her.

• 18:45Speaker 01

  Do you think?

• 18:46Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 18:46Speaker 01

  But you're an effete liberal cunt.

• 18:48Speaker 02

  Right.

• 18:48Speaker 01

  So maybe you would say that. You know, I, I don't like her raised eyebrow. I don't like how she's Roger Moore-ing it.

• 18:56Speaker 02

  I think.

• 18:56Speaker 01

  I reckon we should, I reckon we should have the vote. All right, Emmeline.

• 19:00Speaker 02

  All right, Emmeline.

• 19:01Speaker 01

  I also, I also know that nowadays there is a type of wet dad who names their daughter Emmeline. And you're like, all right, mate.

• 19:11Speaker 02

  All right, mate.

• 19:11Speaker 01

  What are you going to name your son, fucking Mahatma?

• 19:13Speaker 02

  Are you trying to fuck me as well?

• 19:14Speaker 01

  Yeah. Just fuck off, we get it.

• 19:17Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 19:17Speaker 01

  We get it, all right? We lost, we lost it.

• 19:20Speaker 02

  We're planning for the divorce, you get some fucking young poontang.

• 19:22Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 19:23Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's a red flag.

• 19:24Speaker 01

  I should call my daughter Emmeline, actually, so.

• 19:28Speaker 02

  Get Goblin.

• 19:30Speaker 01

  Get Goblin, love. Yeah, I'm one of you guys. Yeah, I think women should have the vote. I'm wearing a T-shirt, I think women should vote. So the suffragette, the term, is coined by the Daily Mail in 1906. And I suppose it's like, it's a derogatory term, but they then reclaim it.

• 19:46Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 19:46Speaker 01

  The WSPU embraced the label, adopting a hard G pronunciation. That is offensive. Suffragette rather than suffragette.

• 19:55Speaker 02

  Yeah, suffragette, too close to courgette, I guess that's what it is.

• 19:58Speaker 01

  Suffragette means to get it. Oh, like that?

• 20:02Speaker 02

  Yeah, suffragette, the vote.

• 20:03Speaker 01

  So you'd fucking suffragette it. Is that what they're saying?

• 20:07Speaker 01

  Like a shoe.

• 20:08Speaker 02

  And there's also the suffragist, the suffragist, the gist of it.

• 20:11Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, we get it. You'd fucking suffragette it, mate. So Pankhurst is born in 1858. She marries Dr. Richard Pankhurst, a lawyer.

• 20:22Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 20:23Speaker 01

  He was 44 and she was 21.

• 20:25Speaker 02

  Let's have a look.

• 20:26Speaker 01

  Ho, ho, ho.

• 20:27Speaker 02

  So problematic age gap relationship.

• 20:29Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 20:31Speaker 01

  She.

• 20:31Speaker 02

  I mean, they're animals.

• 20:34Speaker 01

  So she is one of the most arrested women in British history.

• 20:37Speaker 02

  Nice.

• 20:37Speaker 01

  Okay, so she's a, she's a delinquent.

• 20:39Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 20:40Speaker 01

  She's a terrorist seven times.

• 20:42Speaker 02

  We glamorise breaking the law a lot, you know, but it's not a laughing matter.

• 20:46Speaker 01

  Charlie, could we get a list up of the most arrested women in history just to place Emeline Pankhurst's crimes alongside her accomplices? I'm thinking of women.

• 20:55Speaker 02

  Who's the Moors murderer?

• 20:56Speaker 01

  I'm thinking of people like Rose West.

• 20:58Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 20:59Speaker 01

  Minnie, Minnie Maguire.

• 21:01Speaker 02

  Maguire.

• 21:01Speaker 01

  Who's repeatedly arrested for public disorder. Lindsay Lohan and Courtney Love have been arrested many times.

• 21:08Speaker 02

  Let's find out what Minnie Maguire did, because this is sort of the closest to, because she got arrested almost 500 times.

• 21:14Speaker 01

  She was drunk and disorderly.

• 21:15Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah, the same thing.

• 21:16Speaker 01

  Whining, exactly.

• 21:19Speaker 01

  So by 1910, Pankhurst has a surveillance operation to tail her.

• 21:23Speaker 02

  Right.

• 21:24Speaker 01

  Okay, so the Edwardian sort of equivalent of MI5.

• 21:27Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 21:28Speaker 01

  A tailing Pankhurst.

• 21:29Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 21:29Speaker 01

  Right, I think that's the least they could do.

• 21:31Speaker 02

  It's a very polite age.

• 21:32Speaker 01

  It is a very polite age.

• 21:33Speaker 02

  Which is quite funny, the way that politics and political action is happening in a quite like after you sort of era.

• 21:41Speaker 01

  Well, you'd say.

• 21:42Speaker 02

  A very emotional era.

• 21:43Speaker 01

  Well, you'd say they, this is the first, these are the first rude people.

• 21:46Speaker 02

  This is the birth of rudeness.

• 21:47Speaker 01

  It is, it's the suffragettes.

• 21:48Speaker 02

  And to be honest, the British state has no defence for it.

• 21:51Speaker 01

  No, it crumbles. The first sign of people going, no, what do you mean?

• 21:55Speaker 02

  I don't, I don't know what the.

• 21:56Speaker 01

  What do you mean? Sit down. Stop shouting. Please.

• 22:00Speaker 02

  I've said please.

• 22:00Speaker 01

  I've said please. Do you need to say it again? Deeds not words is her big thing. So she's had a lot of, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, we'll get to it. And so she goes, well, what actions, please? And it's her daughter, Christabel, who becomes a leading figure in the suffragettes.

• 22:18Speaker 02

  Yeah, radicalised.

• 22:19Speaker 01

  Sorry?

• 22:19Speaker 02

  She gets radicalised.

• 22:20Speaker 01

  Yes, she is a lawyer, trained in law, but she can't practise as a lawyer because she's a woman.

• 22:27Speaker 02

  Hmm.

• 22:27Speaker 01

  So she feels a bit annoyed by this.

• 22:29Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 22:30Speaker 01

  But again, I would just say, we'll just be better at law.

• 22:32Speaker 02

  So it's like, has Kim Kardashian passed the bar?

• 22:34Speaker 01

  Has Kim Kardashian passed the bar, Charlie? Has Kim Kardashian passed the bar?

• 22:37Speaker 02

  Have you been keeping up to date with her attempts to be a lawyer?

• 22:41Speaker 01

  Oh, are you serious?

• 22:42Speaker 02

  How do you not know this? Like, Kim Kardashian lawyer.

• 22:44Speaker 01

  Well, her dad was obviously a terrific lawyer.

• 22:45Speaker 02

  No, he's not passed the bar exam. She completed her four-year legal apprenticeship in May 2025 and has taken a break from the bar exam. Has resumed her attempt in 2027. She has, Kardashian previously struggled with the state's baby bar exam, which she ultimately passed on her fourth attempt.

• 22:58Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 22:59Speaker 02

  Right.

• 23:00Speaker 01

  So she is trying to become a lawyer.

• 23:01Speaker 02

  She's trying to become a human rights lawyer.

• 23:03Speaker 01

  Really?

• 23:04Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 23:04Speaker 01

  To be fair.

• 23:06Speaker 02

  What?

• 23:06Speaker 01

  A human rights lawyer with a bundle like that. I'm listening.

• 23:09Speaker 02

  Bring people together.

• 23:10Speaker 01

  Yeah, I'm listening. Christabel, now, she's quite clever in that she understands PR. She's the first PR.

• 23:18Speaker 02

  She's the Goebbels of the.

• 23:19Speaker 01

  Yes, yeah, she is. Yeah, suffragoebbels. She also is the first kind of annoying PR woman, which we have a lot of experience with.

• 23:25Speaker 02

  In Edinburgh.

• 23:25Speaker 01

  In our industry, it's an absolute cesspit.

• 23:28Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 23:28Speaker 01

  The PR industry. They are crooks.

• 23:30Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 23:30Speaker 01

  And they do nothing.

• 23:32Speaker 02

  Yeah, and then they end up with, Edinburgh, everyone gets ransacked and they do the least work and gets the most money somehow.

• 23:37Speaker 01

  Yeah, and then they just get, they're just drunk all the time.

• 23:39Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 23:39Speaker 01

  Can you maybe do something for me? Give them, I've just given you three grand. Ah, chill out. Chill out, I'll get to it.

• 23:44Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 23:45Speaker 01

  So the press quite hilariously obsess over her appearance, which annoys her.

• 23:51Speaker 01

  She's, no, I think they're getting worse, actually, I'd say, from an attractiveness point of view. Does Christabel do anything for you?

• 23:58Speaker 02

  I think Christabel has something about her as well.

• 24:00Speaker 01

  Really? Her eyes are quite far apart.

• 24:02Speaker 02

  There's a certain look that some women can have with the eyes far apart.

• 24:06Speaker 01

  I think.

• 24:06Speaker 02

  Do you know what I mean?

• 24:07Speaker 01

  No, but I think you're, you're, you're reading into vibes.

• 24:10Speaker 02

  Okay, what are you trying to say? Just purely, you're trying to remove the?

• 24:13Speaker 01

  I'm trying to be objective and scientific.

• 24:15Speaker 02

  Okay, so you're trying to remove the kind of like, having a little bit of je ne sais quoi?

• 24:19Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 24:19Speaker 02

  Right.

• 24:20Speaker 01

  But I do, I do, it's not je ne sais quoi, because I know what it is.

• 24:23Speaker 02

  What is it?

• 24:27Speaker 02

  I will say that this is a terrible era for women's hair.

• 24:30Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 24:31Speaker 02

  I just feel they're not doing much for me, because she was probably like in her twenties then, and she's got my great aunt's haircut.

• 24:40Speaker 01

  Yes, that's true. She just.

• 24:42Speaker 02

  Yeah, like, it's not, that's not a good look.

• 24:44Speaker 01

  No, the, the sort of big, the big nest of hair.

• 24:48Speaker 02

  Like, on, if you're watching porn, you're not clicking on the video with, with a woman that hairstyle.

• 24:53Speaker 01

  No.

• 24:53Speaker 02

  No.

• 24:54Speaker 01

  In 1905, Christabel and mill worker Annie Kenny interrupt a political meeting in Manchester.

• 25:01Speaker 02

  But I mean, that is incredibly rude, because.

• 25:04Speaker 01

  Interrupting, aren't you?

• 25:05Speaker 02

  There's a meeting, wait until the meeting's finished and then maybe raise your points.

• 25:08Speaker 01

  And they get ejected and Christabel spits on a police officer to ensure that she gets arrested.

• 25:14Speaker 02

  Right.

• 25:15Speaker 01

  Right.

• 25:15Speaker 02

  So this is like 7/7 bombing.

• 25:17Speaker 01

  Yes, it is. Yeah, the first 7/7.

• 25:20Speaker 01

  And because she wants to get arrested, because she actually understands that if she's imprisoned, it's a PR tour, because she gets into, in jail, suddenly it's a big story. What is it, Charlie?

• 25:29Speaker 03

  Is she doing it in like a hot way or is it?

• 25:30Speaker 01

  I knew you were going to ask that. I knew, I knew you were going to be like.

• 25:34Speaker 02

  She didn't spit on that dang.

• 25:36Speaker 01

  Yeah. She didn't hock to the policeman. Hock to.

• 25:42Speaker 01

  Maybe this is the first hock to.

• 25:44Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 25:44Speaker 01

  Yeah, Christabel Pankhurst.

• 25:45Speaker 02

  Political, a political hock to.

• 25:47Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 25:47Speaker 03

  Is there any way she could have done it that would have avoided arrest? Because would the, would a policeman have been persuadable back then?

• 25:52Speaker 01

  Yeah, if she spits in his cock.

• 25:53Speaker 02

  Yeah, spits in his knob.

• 25:54Speaker 01

  Spits his cock and sucks him off.

• 25:55Speaker 02

  Yeah, and then he says, he lets her off with a warning.

• 25:57Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 25:58Speaker 03

  Do an impression?

• 25:58Speaker 02

  No, that'd be a warning to you. No.

• 26:01Speaker 01

  But this is like, it's like, you're trying to make suffragette porn. That's what you're searching. I want to vote.

• 26:08Speaker 02

  It's looking, I actually want to see suffragette porn.

• 26:10Speaker 01

  Yeah, Charlie, try and find some suffragette porn. So now, we need to talk, right, so she, she understands that imprisonment is a political weapon, and this is all about the, the suffragettes becoming more radical, okay?

• 26:24Speaker 02

  No, no, what's that, Charlie?

• 26:26Speaker 01

  Charlie.

• 26:26Speaker 02

  That's not suffragette porn.

• 26:27Speaker 01

  Why, why is?

• 26:31Speaker 02

  Okay, nothing.

• 26:31Speaker 01

  No, no, no, no, no.

• 26:32Speaker 03

  There you go.

• 26:33Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 26:34Speaker 02

  Sort of.

• 26:35Speaker 01

  No, come on.

• 26:37Speaker 03

  What did you expect?

• 26:38Speaker 01

  Bum out playing the violin. Charlie.

• 26:41Speaker 03

  It's kind of GTA suffragettes.

• 26:42Speaker 01

  Charlie, just get rid of it. Just get rid of it.

• 26:43Speaker 03

  You can't tell me to get a porn and then immediately.

• 26:45Speaker 01

  Yes, we can. Yes, we can.

• 26:47Speaker 02

  Find what we want.

• 26:47Speaker 01

  Yes, we can. So.

• 26:53Speaker 01

  We need to talk about H. H. Asquith, okay?

• 26:56Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 26:57Speaker 01

  Friend of the pod, Liberal Prime Minister. He is the suffragettes' enemy number one.

• 27:01Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 27:01Speaker 01

  And he is a decent man.

• 27:03Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 27:03Speaker 01

  Head of the Liberal Party, and he, he basically.

• 27:06Speaker 02

  Clear head, clear conscience.

• 27:07Speaker 01

  He starts the welfare state.

• 27:08Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 27:08Speaker 01

  He starts pensions.

• 27:10Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 27:11Speaker 01

  He's kind of, this is the.

• 27:12Speaker 02

  Titanic figure in British politics.

• 27:14Speaker 01

  And he's the peak of the Liberal Party, which then will split.

• 27:18Speaker 02

  In rankings of all British Prime Ministers, is he in the top 10?

• 27:21Speaker 01

  Possibly.

• 27:21Speaker 02

  Yeah, he seems to.

• 27:22Speaker 01

  Although, well, maybe, no, maybe not, because it's Lloyd George that sort of follows him. But him and Lloyd George split the Liberal Party, which ultimately kills the.

• 27:30Speaker 02

  He's like Thatcher to the IRA, to the suffragettes, right?

• 27:33Speaker 01

  Yes, yeah. So Asquith argues that the parliamentary vote to women would not, in my opinion, be for the benefit of the state.

• 27:42Speaker 02

  Okay, that's calmly made point.

• 27:44Speaker 01

  Calm, clear.

• 27:46Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 27:46Speaker 01

  No, thank you.

• 27:47Speaker 02

  Good point, well made, Henry.

• 27:48Speaker 01

  Brilliant. That, that should end the argument. So he was the kind of enemy number one. So suffragettes would hiss at the mere mention of his name.

• 27:58Speaker 02

  Snake.

• 27:59Speaker 01

  Snake. They had dartboards with his face on it. He, as they became more militant.

• 28:05Speaker 02

  They're already becoming more blokey.

• 28:06Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 28:06Speaker 02

  It's already happened. The death agenda's already started.

• 28:08Speaker 01

  Exactly.

• 28:08Speaker 02

  Bastard.

• 28:09Speaker 01

  Chivalry, chivalry's dead.

• 28:11Speaker 02

  They're all fucking Luke Littlers.

• 28:12Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 28:14Speaker 01

  He refers to the militant suffragettes as a band of hysterical women.

• 28:18Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 28:18Speaker 01

  Asquith is then stalked by suffragettes, okay? And his second wife, Margot, derides them as wombless, vicious, cruel woman, because she.

• 28:28Speaker 02

  Good woman.

• 28:29Speaker 01

  Is an anti-suffragette. Now, we need to get into these people, these women. There were women, brave, you know, heroes of their gender.

• 28:37Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 28:38Speaker 01

  Who were anti-suffragettes.

• 28:40Speaker 02

  Yeah, Black Restore Britain councillors.

• 28:43Speaker 01

  Exactly. Yeah, what's going on there?

• 28:45Speaker 03

  What's the equivalent to Uncle Tom in this case?

• 28:48Speaker 02

  Auntie.

• 28:49Speaker 01

  Auntie Sheila.

• 28:51Speaker 03

  She's an Auntie Sheila.

• 28:52Speaker 01

  Auntie Pam or something, yeah.

• 28:53Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 28:53Speaker 01

  So you have Violet Markham, okay, who is one of the movement's most articulate opponents.

• 28:59Speaker 02

  She's very well educated. One of the smartest women of the time.

• 29:02Speaker 01

  Yeah, she's the only woman who's, who's smart. She's got the, I'm getting the same vibes from that picture of the disabled people protesting how they should be sterilised. Can you get that picture up, Charlie?

• 29:15Speaker 02

  I shouldn't be allowed to reproduce.

• 29:16Speaker 01

  I can't read this sign, so I shouldn't reproduce.

• 29:19Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 29:19Speaker 01

  Violet Markham, quote, "I believe that women do their best work for the state outside the arena of party politics."

• 29:26Speaker 02

  Well, the whole idea, because a lot of the anti-suffragettes, they viewed the vote as kind of vulgar.

• 29:31Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 29:31Speaker 02

  And there was like, there's a big thing that like, you can get more done through charity and you should be Jackie Weaver in the local council.

• 29:38Speaker 01

  Hmm.

• 29:38Speaker 02

  The actual political vote is a vulgar masculine thing that you shouldn't be tainted with.

• 29:43Speaker 01

  Yes, and it's the cut and thrust of politics which would get in the way of a lot of charitable work.

• 29:50Speaker 02

  Right.

• 29:50Speaker 01

  That women could do.

• 29:51Speaker 02

  The lemonade stands.

• 29:52Speaker 01

  Yes, exactly.

• 29:53Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 29:54Speaker 01

  So there was also Mary Augusta Ward, who founded the Women's National Anti-Suffrage League in 1908. She, yeah, she, I mean, she does, to be fair, looks like a bloke. She thinks that entering party politics would damage the influence women can hold through family life, charity, et cetera. And newspapers would say that anti-suffragettes are like women who climb on a platform and then say that women shouldn't get on platforms.

• 30:18Speaker 02

  Which is the only reason.

• 30:21Speaker 01

  The only reason a woman should get on a platform was to say, yeah, I shouldn't have done this. What are the tactics the suffragettes are using? Okay, this is the sort of the equivalent of getting a Prius, ploughing through a farmer's market, driving down a beach promenade.

• 30:37Speaker 02

  You ploughed through a farmer's market?

• 30:38Speaker 01

  I have, but not in a Prius. I've done it by hand, okay? Crystal Palace Farmer's Market, not far from here.

• 30:46Speaker 02

  It was arguably terrorism, what you did.

• 30:48Speaker 01

  I paid for everything. I paid for everything, okay? Not terrorism if you pay for it. But yeah, no, farmers markets are quite, they're quite. I'd like smaller portions so that I can eat more of it.

• 30:59Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 31:00Speaker 01

  The whole thing about the suffragettes is deeds, not words, because the British government and Asquith have been like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, we'll get to it. So Pankhurst immediately starts interrupting political meetings, heckling ministers. There's a story where she, one of them hides in a fucking church organ for 24 hours and then pops up.

• 31:18Speaker 02

  Yeah. There's a comedic side to it, though.

• 31:21Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 31:22Speaker 02

  It's quite lighthearted, seemingly.

• 31:24Speaker 01

  But you can see why people are like, well, it's all a bit of fun, isn't it?

• 31:27Speaker 02

  Yeah, it seemed like it was just kind of quite like a child, like in the film, it's quite a funny montage, right? Them all jumping out of like bins and stuff.

• 31:36Speaker 01

  Hiding in bins. I want the vote. Well, you're in a bin, love, so I don't think you should vote.

• 31:40Speaker 02

  Get out of there first.

• 31:41Speaker 01

  Get out of the bin.

• 31:41Speaker 02

  And then ask me.

• 31:42Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 31:43Speaker 02

  No.

• 31:43Speaker 01

  Ask me properly. Right, done. So the police would be called for these women, they would go and shout at people speaking.

• 31:52Speaker 02

  Yeah, the image of like a really uptight British policeman with the hats, like, you know, try, come on.

• 31:57Speaker 01

  Right, come on, you've had your fun, come on. But this is where the suffragettes were different. They would not, they would resist arrest, which for the awardians.

• 32:06Speaker 02

  Completely, they had no idea what to do.

• 32:08Speaker 01

  What do you mean resist arrest, right? We've, we've, we've found you, fair and square.

• 32:13Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 32:14Speaker 01

  And so there were like media, the press photos of policemen rugby tackling

• 32:19Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 32:19Speaker 01

  women with big hats.

• 32:21Speaker 02

  And this is all part of the PR campaigns. They know it's images in the newspaper that's going to win them.

• 32:25Speaker 01

  This is what Christopher understands. Many ways the first influencer. She understands the power of images. So the tactics get more militant. They chain themselves to the railings outside Number 10. Yes, Charlie, it could be quite sexy. I know, I can see what you're about to ask. There's a real, they've got a real bruiser called Fiona Drummond, is it, or Flora? She's called Flora. What's she called? Imagine a bruiser called Flora. Yeah, Flora Drummond. So get a photo of her up. She's an absolute fridge, right? She's like.

• 32:58Speaker 02

  She's a bulkhead at the moment.

• 32:59Speaker 01

  There we go. Look at her, look at her. That's, that's.

• 33:02Speaker 02

  I mean, if I go, if I check the pilots, if she's the pilot, we're landing.

• 33:07Speaker 01

  I'm going long haul with Flora Drummond, right? I'm not, I'm not stopping for fuel. Flora Drummond's just got her foot down. She's not sleeping. Look at her. Fuck me. That's a woman.

• 33:17Speaker 02

  Looks like Tim Dillon.

• 33:22Speaker 01

  It does look like. Get a photo of Tim Dillon up. Yeah, yeah, no, remarkable. Tim Dillon, the suffragettes enforcer, Flora Drummond. So she, she would, she's.

• 33:39Speaker 02

  I mean, I'm terrified. If I'm a man, I see Flora, I'm terrified.

• 33:41Speaker 01

  She slipped into Number 10. She just walked into a cabinet meeting. What, what's happening here, love? What are you talking about?

• 33:47Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 33:47Speaker 01

  Suffragettes chain themselves to the, the, the grate of the ladies' gallery in the House of Commons.

• 33:53Speaker 03

  Had a work Mondays.

• 33:54Speaker 01

  And then the authorities had to escort them out, still chained to the gate, but you know, it's, it's humiliating. And of course, being women, they resort very early on, actually.

• 34:08Speaker 02

  To weaponizing girl dinner.

• 34:09Speaker 01

  Weaponizing girl dinner. Hunger strikes. So July the 5th, 1909, the first suffragette goes on a hunger strike for 91 hours in prison. It's later called that. She just didn't eat any dinner. She did it on her own. No one told her to.

• 34:23Speaker 02

  Five glasses of white wine. I've told you.

• 34:26Speaker 01

  No, I don't need to eat. Fucking mess, love. You're a mess.

• 34:30Speaker 02

  How's Amanda with the, with, with her?

• 34:33Speaker 01

  Well, she's, she's, because she's type one diabetic, she just doesn't have any of that.

• 34:36Speaker 02

  Yeah, baby, it's a complete disgrace.

• 34:38Speaker 01

  No, I can imagine.

• 34:39Speaker 02

  Yes, just, if I'm not around her, she will forget to eat any sort of normal.

• 34:44Speaker 01

  Forget to eat.

• 34:45Speaker 02

  Any normal food and then will sort of muck bang.

• 34:47Speaker 01

  How do you forget to eat?

• 34:48Speaker 02

  At like 11pm.

• 34:49Speaker 01

  But what's she muck banning, just like cardboard?

• 34:50Speaker 02

  Ice cream and stuff.

• 34:53Speaker 01

  Fucking toddler. It's, it's insane.

• 34:55Speaker 02

  Yeah. I hate protein. You've got to have protein.

• 34:59Speaker 01

  How do you forget to eat? I mean, they have, they have smaller brains.

• 35:03Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 35:05Speaker 01

  I mean, that's the only explanation. I don't need to keep bringing phrenology into this, but, you know. So she just forgets to have dinner and then the WSP, you call it a hunger strike. Because she's like, I'm, I'm, I'm not criminal, I'm political. Now, what, if we did this in the IRA hunger strikes, what is it about being a political prisoner which means you don't eat your dinner?

• 35:26Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 35:27Speaker 01

  What is it? You're still in prison.

• 35:29Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 35:30Speaker 01

  I don't care if it's political.

• 35:31Speaker 02

  You've got to eat.

• 35:32Speaker 01

  You've got to eat.

• 35:34Speaker 02

  Man's got to eat.

• 35:36Speaker 01

  So, but they release her so that she doesn't become a martyr, right? So then they start, they're like, oh, great, well, let's start hunger striking. That becomes policy. And in 1909, the party introduces a pretty hunger strike medal. A little shiny thing for the women to try and get.

• 35:55Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 35:55Speaker 01

  Because they like shiny things, you know, and then they'd be presented with this at their brunch reception.

• 36:00Speaker 02

  Is this eating disorders?

• 36:02Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 36:03Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 36:03Speaker 01

  Weaponized eating disorders, yeah. And you get your anorexia badge, you get your bulimia badge, then you go and have a nice brunch where you all get awarded, then you go to the toilets and chuck it all up. So the authorities find themselves snookered because if a suffragette dies in prison, then they look bad. But if they refuse, whenever they refuse food, then the government appears weak. So the solution, as it is for all male partners, and you know this as well as I do.

• 36:28Speaker 02

  No, of course.

• 36:29Speaker 01

  Force feeding.

• 36:30Speaker 02

  You have to.

• 36:30Speaker 01

  You have to force feed. You have to force feed your.

• 36:33Speaker 02

  Trick them into eating protein, steak, salmon.

• 36:36Speaker 01

  Yeah. So what Horatio will do, 11pm, is he'll put some salmon fillets in a blender with some creme fraiche, a bit of dill maybe, bulk it out, maybe some wet bread.

• 36:46Speaker 02

  Put an episode of The Pit on, distracted.

• 36:48Speaker 01

  Yeah. Which is, wow, what's the shapes on the TV? And then just, and then you just open her jaw, put a funnel in her mouth and just pour the salmon paste.

• 36:57Speaker 02

  Rinse, repeat. That's our daily routine.

• 37:00Speaker 01

  So prisoners, we've got a photo up here, you can see a woman just being.

• 37:04Speaker 02

  That was me last night.

• 37:05Speaker 01

  That was, that's, sorry, that's, sorry, that's from Horatio's phone, we can get rid of that by the. Restrain the prisoners and then push rubber tubes through their mouth or nose and pour liquid food into the stomach.

• 37:15Speaker 02

  Right.

• 37:16Speaker 01

  Okay, so the liquid food is milk, eggs and sweetened bread. Gruel or a bone broth. And Sylvia Pankhurst calls it the most terrible torture.

• 37:28Speaker 02

  To have to eat.

• 37:28Speaker 01

  To have to eat.

• 37:30Speaker 02

  To eat more at mealtimes.

• 37:31Speaker 01

  Yeah. So between 1909 and 1914, there are hundreds of suffragettes that go on strike. And force feeding becomes quite a big PR boo-boo. I think Emily Davison, we'll get to her next episode, she writes a account of it. And that goes sort of like viral.

• 37:51Speaker 02

  It's not a good image.

• 37:52Speaker 01

  No, but I suppose it's the first woman, first time a woman ever went.

• 37:56Speaker 02

  I don't think it is.

• 37:57Speaker 01

  Isn't it?

• 37:58Speaker 02

  I don't think so.

• 37:58Speaker 01

  You don't think? I don't think they go, I don't think they go as in that way, though.

• 38:01Speaker 02

  No, not these women.

• 38:02Speaker 01

  No. I don't think women are gagging on cocks until after World War II.

• 38:07Speaker 02

  Yeah, but I think they were gagging on cocks and then they stopped gagging on, it's like, it's up and down throughout history.

• 38:14Speaker 01

  Do you think?

• 38:14Speaker 02

  Yeah. So I think the Victorians zipped it up.

• 38:17Speaker 01

  Right.

• 38:17Speaker 02

  I think in the Restoration, they were gagging on cocks.

• 38:19Speaker 01

  Do you think? Where is it, Charlie?

• 38:20Speaker 03

  I know somebody who.

• 38:21Speaker 02

  Gags on a cock?

• 38:22Speaker 03

  Yeah, and then she, she threw up on his knob and then, and then when he jumped off, he.

• 38:27Speaker 01

  Jumped off? Jumped off? Sorry, I'm just. I'm just trying to picture how that, jumped off.

• 38:39Speaker 03

  He reacted to the sick and then, and then like jumped off and then she jumped backwards and smashed her foot through the TV. She basically smashed the TV. She threw up, threw up on his knob and then he reacted and then she smashed her TV with her foot and then had to leave.

• 38:55Speaker 01

  Oh, you've told me this as well. And then didn't the bloke ask for, didn't the bloke?

• 39:01Speaker 03

  Reparations.

• 39:02Speaker 01

  Ask for reparations?

• 39:03Speaker 02

  Reparations, yeah.

• 39:04Speaker 01

  For the, the woman had to pay.

• 39:05Speaker 03

  Some bollocks, yeah, yeah.

• 39:06Speaker 01

  No, the TV was off the wall.

• 39:08Speaker 03

  And so he asked for a new TV.

• 39:09Speaker 01

  She kicked back like a donkey, he says.

• 39:10Speaker 02

  And I think he asked for half the payment of the TV.

• 39:13Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 39:13Speaker 02

  Which he knows.

• 39:14Speaker 01

  I think that's fair, you know.

• 39:17Speaker 02

  Look, you, you, you gobbled me cock, so I'll pay for one half of it, but you smashed my TV.

• 39:21Speaker 01

  You also threw up on my cock, so really you should pay for everything.

• 39:24Speaker 03

  It must happen quite a lot. How often a day?

• 39:26Speaker 02

  Must happen a lot. I think it happens a lot.

• 39:28Speaker 01

  How often a day?

• 39:29Speaker 03

  How many times, you know, there's one born every minute. How many times is it?

• 39:32Speaker 01

  Cock thrown up on every minute. The disappointing sequel to One Born Every Minute.

• 39:37Speaker 02

  Yeah, we just thought after the first one, it would be another hit.

• 39:40Speaker 03

  I reckon globally, maybe like 60 a day, 60.

• 39:43Speaker 01

  60 cocks thrown up on, I don't think that's enough.

• 39:45Speaker 03

  2,000.

• 39:46Speaker 02

  Don't think it's enough?

• 39:47Speaker 01

  I think it's enough.

• 39:47Speaker 02

  A day?

• 39:48Speaker 01

  A day. Think about how much porn is being made all the time.

• 39:50Speaker 03

  No, but you never see any sick going on.

• 39:52Speaker 01

  What?

• 39:53Speaker 03

  You heard.

• 39:55Speaker 01

  There's got, there's got to be more than that.

• 39:57Speaker 03

  Couple thousand? Jake, I think it's happening now.

• 40:00Speaker 01

  Yeah, somewhere.

• 40:01Speaker 02

  Charlie looked scared, but also kind of interested.

• 40:04Speaker 01

  So, yes, women are being force fed in prison from 1909. The suffragettes are, as, as more arrests happen.

• 40:12Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 40:13Speaker 01

  They're getting, they're getting tall up, basically. They've got fucking Flora the Fridge Drummond.

• 40:18Speaker 02

  Yeah, they've got an Amazonian Guard of Lesbians.

• 40:21Speaker 01

  Genuinely. They have a lesbian Gaddafi Amazonian Guard, right? Because whenever Pankhurst is going through the street.

• 40:28Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 40:29Speaker 01

  She's, I mean, she's being tailed by the, the state.

• 40:32Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 40:32Speaker 01

  And people are pelting her, going, you're a terrorist or whatever.

• 40:35Speaker 02

  Is it, is it a scrum? Is that the collective noun for lesbians?

• 40:38Speaker 01

  A scrum of lesbians, yes. Or a hike, maybe? I think it's a hike of lesbians. I don't know what, what's the, what's the collective noun for non-binaries?

• 40:49Speaker 02

  Is it like a, a wist or like?

• 40:51Speaker 01

  A question mark of non-binaries? A mist?

• 40:54Speaker 02

  A confusion?

• 40:55Speaker 01

  A confusion. Thank you. A trap. No, it's a trap of trans. It's a trap of transgenders.

• 41:02Speaker 02

  And a confusion of non-binaries.

• 41:06Speaker 01

  Yeah, they have a hike of lesbians that are surrounding Pankhurst at all times. They're known as the Amazons and their main objective is to shield Emmeline from all the police attempts to detain her, right? So they learn fucking jujitsu.

• 41:21Speaker 02

  Okay, this is getting serious now.

• 41:23Speaker 01

  This is, there's a, there's a four foot eleven fucking absolute weapon of a woman called Edith. Is she French? Edith Garrod, right? She's the world's first professional female martial arts instructor.

• 41:37Speaker 02

  But also Edwardian fashion is the least jujitsu sort of friendly fashion.

• 41:40Speaker 01

  We're seeing a photo now of her, it looks like she's got a wedding cake on her fucking head and she's throwing a man to the floor. It's insane, right? She is British, right? She trains this bodyguard unit.

• 41:51Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 41:52Speaker 01

  This is like when the Taliban are in the hills of Pakistan, right? She's in the like Surrey Hills, this woman is training respectable Edwardian women how to throw policemen to the floor.

• 42:02Speaker 02

  Formally respectable.

• 42:03Speaker 01

  Formally, yeah. Lost women how to throw policemen to the floor. So she's like, use your hat pins as daggers.

• 42:10Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 42:11Speaker 01

  And then so this spate of officers trying to attempt to arrest middle-class women who get absolutely humiliated because they get thrown to the floor by deadly, I mean, this is insane.

• 42:23Speaker 02

  Little ninjas.

• 42:24Speaker 01

  I did not know that, you know, women vote on the backs of jujitsu terrorists. It's astonishing. And this, this violence, right, which is one-sided, it must be said.

• 42:36Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 42:37Speaker 01

  Leads to.

• 42:38Speaker 02

  That's true.

• 42:39Speaker 01

  It's one-sided, okay? Black Friday, 1910.

• 42:43Speaker 02

  Another Black Friday.

• 42:44Speaker 01

  Another, another.

• 42:45Speaker 02

  Stop calling it Black Friday, just come up with a new name for it.

• 42:48Speaker 01

  Pink Friday probably.

• 42:49Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 42:50Speaker 01

  This is the peak, okay? This is November the 18th, 1910. 300 women marched to Parliament after yet another suffrage bill is collapsed and for six hours, police and protesters clash in Parliament Square. Officers had been instructed not to make arrests because they were getting wise to the fact that this is their PR tactic. And then protesters accuse police of widespread violence and sexual assault, but I would like to ask, what were they wearing?

• 43:19Speaker 02

  I think they were wearing a wedding cake on their head.

• 43:21Speaker 01

  Well, fair enough, you know? Come on, I'm flesh and blood, yeah? Look at that. You're wearing a wedding cake in a fucking floor-length skirt. What am I meant to do? What am I meant to do?

• 43:30Speaker 02

  I'm only human.

• 43:32Speaker 01

  I can't even see your toes. What am I meant to do? Eh? You're covering everything up.

• 43:36Speaker 02

  Literally only your neck on show.

• 43:38Speaker 01

  Only your neck on show. Well, fucking, come on, I'm a hand dog. Let men be men, all right? Boys will be boys.

• 43:45Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 43:46Speaker 01

  Numerous women later report being punched, twisted, groped and assaulted.

• 43:51Speaker 02

  Yeah, but they're doing jujitsu, so fucking.

• 43:53Speaker 01

  Well, I mean, come on.

• 43:54Speaker 02

  If you can't handle the heat, you stay in the kitchen.

• 43:56Speaker 01

  Exactly. And also stay in the kitchen. The government refuses a public inquiry, okay? Because it's being run properly by HS Asquith. He's like, I always don't need this. Just calm, everyone calm down. This is the long road to David Cameron telling that woman to calm down.

• 44:09Speaker 02

  Is Asquith, was Asquith the one with the young peace? Is he the one who's always writing, writing letters to his?

• 44:14Speaker 01

  Don't know, can we find that out?

• 44:15Speaker 02

  Do you know about this?

• 44:16Speaker 01

  No.

• 44:17Speaker 02

  Asquith, he, he becomes incredibly horny for his daughter's best friend. I believe he's 18 when he's 65.

• 44:26Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 44:27Speaker 02

  And we, there's a collection of his unbelievably horny letters. Yes, is it, yeah, yeah. Venetia, Venetia Stanley.

• 44:34Speaker 01

  A close friend of his daughter Violet.

• 44:35Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 44:36Speaker 01

  Oh, hello.

• 44:37Speaker 02

  So you know, in World War One, when there was like the meeting about Gallipoli?

• 44:39Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 44:40Speaker 02

  Right? The whole time, he's writing a letter during that.

• 44:43Speaker 01

  No.

• 44:44Speaker 02

  Just like writing horny, he's basically sending dick pics.

• 44:46Speaker 01

  In the meeting.

• 44:47Speaker 02

  Edwardian dick pics.

• 44:48Speaker 01

  Fuck.

• 44:49Speaker 02

  During the meeting, that Gallipoli, he's like, yeah, yeah, whatever you want, Churchill, just do it.

• 44:52Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 44:53Speaker 02

  As he's just drawing his knob and fucking posting it to.

• 44:54Speaker 01

  I mean, that's where my great-granddad fought. She was saying that part of the reason he got.

• 44:58Speaker 02

  Yeah, because this fucking Asquith was completely horned out his mind.

• 45:01Speaker 01

  Part of the reason that he got shell shock, came back, his wife killed himself, was because this cunt was writing love letters to, to an 18-year-old during the meeting. That's amazing.

• 45:09Speaker 02

  Yeah. Absolute horn dog, Asquith. So was he, was, um, was he, what did Venetia, did he write to her about suffragettes? Because he wrote to her about everything. He told her all state secrets and stuff.

• 45:22Speaker 01

  Really?

• 45:23Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 45:24Speaker 01

  God.

• 45:25Speaker 02

  So he did respect women's opinion if they were vomiting on his knob.

• 45:27Speaker 03

  How explicit do you imagine the, the writings back then would have been? Because now it's like, I can feel you dripping out of me or like, I'm.

• 45:35Speaker 01

  Jesus Christ.

• 45:36Speaker 02

  I think you'd be surprised.

• 45:40Speaker 01

  Now it's like that, is it?

• 45:42Speaker 02

  Well, remember Charlie, this, all you have is writings because now it's much more visual culture, it's far more literate back then. So the filth would have to come through the words.

• 45:50Speaker 03

  But is it like, I'm throbbing or like, or is it just, is it much more kind of like, my delicate flower burns?

• 45:55Speaker 02

  Well, Napoleon wrote to.

• 45:57Speaker 01

  Josephine.

• 45:59Speaker 02

  Josephine saying, I'll be back in three days, don't wash.

• 46:02Speaker 01

  But also, what was that thing with the Russian Revolution, it was about a similar, similar time? The, the Roman obs, what was, what was it? Miss Lizzie?

• 46:10Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 46:11Speaker 01

  Nicholas, Tsar Nicholas II would write to Miss Lizzie.

• 46:13Speaker 02

  You'd write letters to someone who had fanny?

• 46:15Speaker 03

  Yeah, but it's not like I'm going to blow Lizzie's door back, you know, back out. I'm going to tear Lizzie to pieces. It's like, I want to see Lizzie. It's still, there's still a class to it.

• 46:23Speaker 01

  Is anyone saying, is anyone going to say, I'm going to tear your cunt to pieces? Is anyone saying that nowadays?

• 46:26Speaker 02

  I don't think people are saying that.

• 46:27Speaker 03

  I imagine so, yeah.

• 46:28Speaker 01

  Really?

• 46:29Speaker 02

  Yeah, people are saying that.

• 46:30Speaker 01

  Are they?

• 46:31Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 46:32Speaker 01

  Gosh, I really am.

• 46:33Speaker 02

  It's not like a common vernacular, but.

• 46:34Speaker 01

  I really am sequestered away, aren't I? Sorry, are they saying that in the confines of a relationship where they just go up to women in the apartment and say that?

• 46:38Speaker 02

  I imagine you're.

• 46:39Speaker 01

  Grab your coat, love, I'm going to tear your cunt to pieces.

• 46:43Speaker 02

  Um, what, um.

• 46:48Speaker 01

  Do women want their cunt to be mauled, is my question?

• 46:50Speaker 02

  Maybe they're, they're kind of, they want to be wanted.

• 46:54Speaker 01

  Research just went like this. I can't, I can't. I can't got mauled. Fucking hell. Like an XL bully on a toddler. Christ.

• 47:15Speaker 02

  Do you know that Werner Herzog went to a grizzly man?

• 47:17Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 47:18Speaker 02

  And at the end, he listens to him going.

• 47:20Speaker 01

  He's getting mauled.

• 47:21Speaker 02

  This is what, that's what women want from their, terms of their cunt.

• 47:23Speaker 01

  I don't understand.

• 47:24Speaker 02

  Is Werner Herzog to listen to it going.

• 47:25Speaker 01

  Oh no.

• 47:27Speaker 02

  Don't ever listen to this.

• 47:29Speaker 01

  Oh man.

• 47:30Speaker 02

  Promise me, don't ever listen to this.

• 47:31Speaker 01

  I don't understand female sexuality at all.

• 47:33Speaker 02

  So you, are you, do you, are you a dirty talker in the bedroom?

• 47:37Speaker 01

  Oh, kiss me, buy me dinner first and then maul my cunt like a dog.

• 47:39Speaker 02

  Well, yeah, it's the two sides. They want, they want both.

• 47:42Speaker 01

  I know.

• 47:43Speaker 02

  And that's, that's what, I think that's all women ask for is they want both and men seem to struggle to switch.

• 47:49Speaker 01

  Get your guy, get your guy who can.

• 47:50Speaker 02

  Yeah, exactly.

• 47:51Speaker 01

  Take you out to dinner.

• 47:52Speaker 02

  It's like the guy who mauls cunt is also the rapist. Can we have the, the guy who visits you to dinner and then?

• 47:56Speaker 01

  A gentleman.

• 47:57Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 47:58Speaker 03

  I think if I use kind of, if I say like pussy, I create, I've tried to say it like, let me, I'll just be like, I want to fuck your pussy, but then I kind of start, I cringe because I'm.

• 48:08Speaker 01

  Yeah, I'm, I'm cringing now.

• 48:09Speaker 03

  I can't pull it off. So if I say like, let me touch your, let me be with your garden or something, then it's like.

• 48:13Speaker 02

  Do you say that? That's worse.

• 48:15Speaker 01

  I think that's worse, it's way worse.

• 48:16Speaker 02

  But how much are you, are you chatty during sex?

• 48:18Speaker 03

  Yeah, but the other day we, I was like.

• 48:19Speaker 01

  You chat during sex?

• 48:20Speaker 02

  But you laugh a lot.

• 48:21Speaker 03

  Yeah, I just made a curry and I was like.

• 48:22Speaker 02

  Which I think is unacceptable.

• 48:23Speaker 03

  We were in the midst of it and I was like.

• 48:24Speaker 02

  Well, you made a curry?

• 48:25Speaker 03

  I made a curry before and I was like, are you feeling a bit burpy? But like during it.

• 48:28Speaker 02

  That's horrible.

• 48:31Speaker 01

  Sorry, sorry, you're saying that as if it's getting you off, like you, like mid-thrust going, are you feeling burpy, are you? Yeah? Do you need a Rennie? Yeah?

• 48:39Speaker 03

  And then we had to stop.

• 48:42Speaker 01

  I'm going to spout Gaviscon all over your tits.

• 48:44Speaker 02

  Yeah, snort his Rennie off my cock.

• 48:45Speaker 01

  Yeah. I'm going to spew Gaviscon all over your tits. Crazy.

• 48:50Speaker 03

  Am I a good boy? I say, am I a good boy? I say, I do say.

• 48:53Speaker 02

  Do you say that?

• 48:54Speaker 01

  You feeling burpy, am I a good boy? That's what you say during sex.

• 48:56Speaker 02

  Do you like being called a good boy?

• 48:58Speaker 03

  Yeah, but I want to be like, kind of in charge when it's happening, but I am, I want to be a good boy. Am I, do, am I a good boy?

• 49:04Speaker 01

  Like a dog?

• 49:06Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 49:07Speaker 01

  Fucking hell.

• 49:09Speaker 02

  So ladies, if you want to be cooked to curry, get you a man who can do both, cook you a curry, then fuck you and ask if you're burpy.

• 49:15Speaker 01

  Yeah. So yeah, Asquith is busy mauling the cunt off his teenage daughter's best friend. Yes, Black Friday is, um.

• 49:25Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 49:26Speaker 01

  Women be shopping.

• 49:28Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 49:29Speaker 01

  Almost immediately, the event's known as that. Um, so they.

• 49:32Speaker 02

  So there's a, there's a deal on at Primark.

• 49:34Speaker 01

  Yeah. And again, there's just no.

• 49:36Speaker 02

  They've trampled over each other.

• 49:37Speaker 01

  Yeah, and the, the police are just trying to get them to form a queue, but the bargains, does something to their small brains.

• 49:44Speaker 02

  Yeah. They're beating up grannies, they don't give a fuck.

• 49:47Speaker 01

  Yeah, they're trying to just get their hands on.

• 49:49Speaker 02

  Any collectivism's gone out the window.

• 49:50Speaker 01

  No, they're just trying to grab the nearest nuclear bullet and run. So 115 women are arrested and four male feminists.

• 49:58Speaker 02

  Oh, we need to see these guys.

• 50:00Speaker 01

  Yes, now they are, they are, that is something that.

• 50:02Speaker 02

  So four Benedict Cumberbatches.

• 50:04Speaker 01

  The long road to this is what a feminist looks like.

• 50:06Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 50:07Speaker 01

  Can we have a look at some male suffragettes? Um, I do think we should start calling male feminists male suffragettes.

• 50:12Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 50:13Speaker 01

  Because, uh, yeah, here we go. That's Keir Hardy, who founded the Labour Party.

• 50:17Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 50:18Speaker 01

  Uh, he's the first one, he's one of the first ones.

• 50:19Speaker 02

  Are these guys getting a lot of pussy?

• 50:21Speaker 01

  No.

• 50:22Speaker 02

  They're trying to.

• 50:23Speaker 01

  No, but these aren't, these guys don't maul cunt.

• 50:25Speaker 02

  Right.

• 50:26Speaker 01

  Do they? Because they're too, you know, this is, this is the great problem of female sexuality. I want to be respected right up until I want my cunt mauled like a dog.

• 50:38Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 50:39Speaker 01

  And you go, when, when do I, when do I push that button?

• 50:43Speaker 02

  You want someone who respects you, I get that, but then think about how much cunt Errol Musk gets.

• 50:48Speaker 01

  Boy, exactly. The messages I'm getting from society are marry your stepdaughter because one woman's another woman.

• 50:54Speaker 02

  He's not right, one woman is another woman.

• 50:55Speaker 01

  I mean, he is right about that.

• 50:56Speaker 02

  Technically.

• 50:57Speaker 01

  He is right about that.

• 50:58Speaker 02

  One woman is another woman.

• 50:59Speaker 01

  He would have eaten these cunts for breakfast, by the way, Errol Musk. These are the opposite of Errol Musk, these guys, male. Hugh Franklin we're looking at now, he's a member of Men's Political Union for Women's Enfranchisement, the MPU, I imagine it sounds like this.

• 51:11Speaker 01

  I think women should have the vote, actually.

• 51:15Speaker 02

  I'll piss off you.

• 51:16Speaker 01

  I'll piss off you. Would you fucking take a day off, would you? This is what a suffragette looks like.

• 51:23Speaker 01

  He's at the side of protests.

• 51:26Speaker 01

  So he attacked Winston Churchill on a train with a horse whip.

• 51:30Speaker 02

  He says, "Take that." People don't say "take that" anymore.

• 51:32Speaker 01

  "Take that, Winston Churchill, you dirty cur." Now, is cur a-

• 51:35Speaker 02

  Is that a slur?

• 51:36Speaker 01

  Must be. Must be a- Must be a- but it's- I don't think it's a racialised slur.

• 51:41Speaker 02

  We can make it racialised.

• 51:42Speaker 01

  It's an old fashioned, what's cur-

• 51:44Speaker 03

  It's a dirty dog.

• 51:44Speaker 01

  A sort of mixed breed mongrel dog. Okay, fine.

• 51:47Speaker 02

  And Churchill looks like a bulldog, so that's pretty offensive.

• 51:50Speaker 01

  That's very offensive, actually. I do apologise.

• 51:52Speaker 02

  I imagine he's quite insecure about his weight, so-

• 51:54Speaker 01

  And his hygiene. What is it, Charlie?

• 51:56Speaker 03

  Do you think Hugh Franklin might be- you know those guys that kind of pretend to be- do you think he could be quite nasty behind closed doors?

• 52:01Speaker 01

  Well, there is a pattern-

• 52:02Speaker 03

  There's a nastiness.

• 52:03Speaker 01

  There is a nastiness to the outward, uh, male feminist.

• 52:08Speaker 02

  You know, Errol Musk, I don't think there's, like, hidden evils.

• 52:12Speaker 01

  Not- he's not hiding much, I don't think, Errol. He's not got many skeletons in his closet, does Errol? He's- he's putting skeletons on the fucking front patio.

• 52:21Speaker 01

  But, you know, there is a-

• 52:22Speaker 02

  It's like a Halloween outside Errol's house.

• 52:25Speaker 01

  But there is a sort of- there is a trope certainly within comedy. I don't know about the rest of the side.

• 52:29Speaker 03

  In spoken word, there's a lot of-

• 52:30Speaker 02

  Oh, I can imagine.

• 52:32Speaker 01

  Charlie, I think every spoken word artist is a rapist, and there's not much you can do to-

• 52:36Speaker 02

  That's the whole podcast stands by that opinion.

• 52:38Speaker 01

  Yeah, there's not much you can do to change my mind on that. I think if you're doing spoken word live, I think you've raped in the past.

• 52:43Speaker 02

  Yeah. And you will rape again.

• 52:45Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's just my opinion.

• 52:48Speaker 02

  That's just fact.

• 52:48Speaker 03

  You were saying?

• 52:49Speaker 01

  Certainly in comedy, there's a definitely a, um, a feeling that the most outspoken-

• 52:55Speaker 02

  Always.

• 52:55Speaker 01

  -male feminists are actually the ones women have to worry about the most. There's- there's lots of stories of, you know, the guys who fucking-

• 53:02Speaker 02

  You're a deeply problematic man, but then you go home to two kids, a family and mortgage-

• 53:06Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 53:06Speaker 02

  With a cash cow in the drive.

• 53:08Speaker 01

  Exactly. Yeah. My cash cow's problematic, but that's for hygiene reasons. It is who wears compliance, all right? But yeah, well, I- I mean, I monetise my problematicness rather than-

• 53:20Speaker 02

  Everyone sees- you get- all the worst stuff is out, yeah.

• 53:22Speaker 01

  Exactly.

• 53:23Speaker 02

  Anyone who only shows this kind of perfect image of themselves morally, what's he hiding?

• 53:27Speaker 01

  Especially if you're to stand up at where you're working at it, it's like, why are you working at being nice?

• 53:33Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 53:34Speaker 01

  Isn't it better to work to be like a version of yourself that's awful, that's people find funny?

• 53:39Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 53:39Speaker 01

  Right? Whereas- and then you turn that off and you're just like a normal guy, right? But if you're like the-

• 53:45Speaker 02

  But we know in comedy, there's the trope of- there's so many stories.

• 53:48Speaker 01

  The archetype of the male feminist stand-up.

• 53:50Speaker 02

  Yeah, always the biggest scumbag.

• 53:52Speaker 01

  I mean, yeah, always the biggest scumbag. Anyway.

• 53:55Speaker 02

  That's why, you know, people like Errol Musk are less problematic, I think.

• 53:58Speaker 01

  Yes, yes, exactly. Because it's about deeds, not words.

• 54:01Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 54:01Speaker 01

  Deeds, not words.

• 54:02Speaker 02

  He's not hiding anything.

• 54:03Speaker 01

  No, one woman's another woman. So, after Black Friday in 1910, it's all getting quite violent. The suffragettes, okay, are getting increasingly militant, right? And in 1912, we have the Great Window Smashing Campaign.

• 54:18Speaker 02

  Kristallnacht.

• 54:19Speaker 01

  Healing Kristallnacht. They launch- They launch a coordinated attack on windows, all right? They, you know, they bite off their hand to spite their face. They're smashing up shop windows. Where are you meant to spend the next fucking weekend, love?

• 54:33Speaker 02

  So you're really obsessed with the quality, but don't give a hell about windows.

• 54:36Speaker 01

  Yeah, that-

• 54:37Speaker 02

  Square that circle.

• 54:40Speaker 02

  Right.

• 54:41Speaker 01

  Hippocritical much? Does a window not have a right to exist?

• 54:45Speaker 02

  Should windows have the vote?

• 54:46Speaker 01

  I think windows have a right to defend themselves. They would conceal hammers in their muffs. Oh no, what's a muff at this point?

• 54:53Speaker 02

  What is a muff?

• 54:53Speaker 01

  What is a muff? It's an Edwardian thing, isn't it?

• 54:55Speaker 02

  So how baggy are these muffs?

• 54:57Speaker 01

  Five reckon Flora Drummond's got a fucking hammer in her muff.

• 55:00Speaker 02

  For loads. I mean, it should take ages to find it, because it's so big.

• 55:02Speaker 01

  Exactly, right. Leading on a haystack, fucking hammer in Drummond's muff. A muff is like a big glove thing.

• 55:08Speaker 02

  Right.

• 55:09Speaker 01

  Right, okay. So they'd walk around. Oh yeah, so it's like you see those scooters, delivery drivers have the oven mitts on their scooters now. That's a sort of new age muff.

• 55:17Speaker 02

  So a big hairy thing.

• 55:18Speaker 01

  Big hairy thing.

• 55:19Speaker 02

  And someone's like, "Oh, that's a nice muff." He goes, "No, that's literally my pubic hair."

• 55:23Speaker 01

  Yeah, all right.

• 55:23Speaker 02

  So we would pull on it, thinking-

• 55:24Speaker 01

  Is that where it started? Is that where it began?

• 55:26Speaker 02

  I think so.

• 55:26Speaker 01

  In the tundra, millions of years ago.

• 55:29Speaker 02

  Of Flora Drummond's muff.

• 55:31Speaker 01

  Flora Drummond's muff. There was, um, you know, when there was a little- stop clicking at me. When there's a little, um, when there's a little scallop woman, that one is that thing. The first woman has a really big hairy muff and she keeps her hands warm in her pubic hair. Is that what you're saying?

• 55:44Speaker 02

  I'd love to keep my hands warm, Flora Drummond's muff. I mean, is there anything warmer?

• 55:47Speaker 01

  Yeah. The problem is, it's not a safe place to be. It's not a welcoming space for us, Flora Drummond's muff. It's a hostile environment.

• 55:57Speaker 02

  Yeah, but it's the great explorers-

• 55:58Speaker 01

  She's hissing.

• 56:00Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's frontier.

• 56:01Speaker 01

  It is the frontier. So, women conceal hammers in their muffs and their handbags. And this is- it's what's crazy is that these are respectable, middle-class, you know, women, probably the most respectable-looking women there have ever been. Big fucking cake hats, you know, not an ounce of flesh on show.

• 56:18Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 56:19Speaker 01

  And they're terrorists. Asking for it. They are asking for it. They're asking for the vote, and I'm like, "Well, that's not why I'm here."

• 56:27Speaker 01

  And, you know, they damage thousands of pounds' worth of shop windows.

• 56:32Speaker 02

  I don't know if we've recovered financially from it, yeah.

• 56:34Speaker 01

  I don't think- but also, you know, the Nazis- Kristallnacht is when the Nazis turn, isn't it?

• 56:40Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 56:40Speaker 01

  Because Anschluss happens before that.

• 56:41Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 56:42Speaker 01

  And like, as we say, we're pro-Anschluss. Kristallnacht, we go, "Well, hang on, guys, where's this going?"

• 56:47Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 56:47Speaker 01

  "I'm gonna get off the bus here, actually." We don't say the same about the suffragettes.

• 56:51Speaker 02

  No, we don't.

• 56:52Speaker 01

  You know, where is the suffragette Nuremberg?

• 56:55Speaker 02

  That's, yeah. We still have time.

• 56:57Speaker 01

  There is still time. Sandy Toksvig is the head of the party, isn't she now?

• 57:00Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 57:01Speaker 01

  The Women's Equality Party. She is. They've got the same colours, green, white and purple, whatever it is. I think we should haul her over the coals.

• 57:08Speaker 02

  Yeah, we should at least get her to pay for the windows that were smashed.

• 57:11Speaker 01

  Listen, uh, Christabel Pankhurst flees to Paris, right? And then she kind of operates from there, and she gets criticised as being like a general directing battle from a safe distance. Because she's no longer- she's now wanted for incitement, incitement and violence. And we just- before, uh, before we end this episode, we need to get into the practice of whipping.

• 57:31Speaker 02

  Right.

• 57:31Speaker 01

  Because this was-

• 57:32Speaker 02

  Emily Spankhurst.

• 57:34Speaker 01

  Emily Spankhurst. Again, they love- some of them, they love it- they love it rough when they want it. Do you know what I mean? When am I meant to turn rough? Help me out, you know? I'm buying you dinner, I'm respecting you, I'm kissing you first.

• 57:46Speaker 02

  Is it in between the main course and the dessert?

• 57:47Speaker 01

  Am I meant to mull your cunt before dessert or after? You know? Where did digestives come in? So, November the 13th, 1909, Theresa Garnet fucking strikes Churchill with a dog whip. Shouting "Take that in the name of the insulted women of England."

• 58:05Speaker 02

  Okay, nice.

• 58:05Speaker 01

  She gets a month in prison, forgets to have dinner and is force-fed, but that's irrelevant, really. That's just, "Come on." At a Scottish golf club, two young ladies ambush Asquith.

• 58:15Speaker 02

  But he's having- it's his time off.

• 58:17Speaker 01

  It's his- can a prime minister not have a holiday? It's stressful.

• 58:20Speaker 02

  He's not the prime minister on the golf course.

• 58:21Speaker 01

  No. They knock his hat off and they whack him over the head with a roll-up magazine.

• 58:27Speaker 01

  Right? Which is terrorism, Edwardian terrorism. For Edwardians, this is terrorism, right? And on the same day, at midnight-

• 58:33Speaker 02

  They're basically driven through a German Christmas market.

• 58:34Speaker 01

  You might as well have done. On the same day, Flora Drummond, right, Tim Dillon with a massive muff, corners Asquith in a hotel corridor and attempts to lash him with a whip.

• 58:45Speaker 02

  Now, is this a sexual thing?

• 58:46Speaker 01

  Well, it can't- why- why the whip? Why is that a tactic?

• 58:49Speaker 02

  Well, is this a dominant- this is beginning of dominatrix?

• 58:51Speaker 01

  I think there must be. The beginning of the dominatrix.

• 58:53Speaker 02

  Didn't hate it. He was surprised. Because he was like, "God, that's annoying, but I mean..."

• 58:57Speaker 01

  "Who are you?"

• 59:01Speaker 02

  "Do you have any younger friends?"

• 59:03Speaker 01

  So Flora is always known as the general.

• 59:07Speaker 02

  The general.

• 59:08Speaker 01

  And always dressed in a navy getup. And so, yeah, Pankhurst justifies the whipping by saying it's perfectly proper for him to be assaulted with a dog whip, given his political stalling.

• 59:18Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 59:18Speaker 01

  Fucking, in 1912, uh, some mad woman throws an axe at Asquith during a meeting in Dublin, and it misses him, but fucking hits an Irish nationalist leader, who luckily survives.

• 59:30Speaker 02

  Yeah, because that's all going on at the time.

• 59:32Speaker 01

  There's home rule at the time.

• 59:33Speaker 02

  A much bigger deal.

• 59:34Speaker 01

  We'll get to it, guys, all right? There's stuff going on.

• 59:38Speaker 02

  Yeah. We've got more whinging from over the virus.

• 59:40Speaker 01

  I mean, I know, there's whinging on whinging. It's rounded.

• 59:44Speaker 01

  A man gets whipped at Euston Station by a suffragette who mistakes him for Asquith. I mean, it's- it's getting unreasonable. It is carnage.

• 59:52Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 59:52Speaker 01

  And yet, chaining themselves to things, not eating their dinner, smashing up their shop windows and whipping men is not working, okay? And so it is time for these terrorists to up the ante.

• 1:00:06Speaker 02

  If that was possible. I don't know where you go from here.

• 1:00:08Speaker 01

  Well-

• 1:00:09Speaker 02

  You've started big.

• 1:00:09Speaker 01

  New lows will be found. In our next episode, women be bombing.

• 1:00:16Speaker 01

  Lesbian terrorists are ousted.

• 1:00:19Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:00:20Speaker 01

  And we will finally learn if women ever do get the vote.

• 1:00:23Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:00:24Speaker 01

  That episode is already on our Patreon, uh, which for £3 a month, you can join to get internet access to series, uh, we're the biggest in the UK, and we are proudly anti-suffragists, okay? Proudly. It's a safe space. There are forums there where you can discuss, uh, all your anti-suffragists' policies and thoughts, okay?

• 1:00:43Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:00:44Speaker 01

  There are some women there as well, and they believe they shouldn't have the right to vote. And they, I understand respectfully, every election spoil their ballot. On the Patreon, uh, the bonus episode this week, we're talking about Nancy Astor, who's the first female MP. Which is a crazy story. She, uh, she was an anti-sympathiser.

• 1:01:05Speaker 01

  Anyway, you, um, you never know what do this sort of stuff. Never know where it's gonna lead. Anyway, uh, that's on the Patreon, but if not, we'll see you on Thursday for part two of the tragic tale of the suffragettes from all of us here. Goodbye.

• 1:01:15Speaker 02

  Goodbye.