Your Job is This Simple | Accepting What Is

When misinformation and extremism and utter nonsense pervades…When cruelty and meanness become acceptable…When the system is falling apart and the center looks like it may not hold…Your job is simple. 🎟️https://www.dailystoiclive.com/DAILY STOIC LIVE https://www.dailystoiclive.com/| Ryan Holiday is coming to a city near you https://www.dailystoiclive.com/! Grab tickets here https://www.dailystoiclive.com/ | https://www.dailystoiclive.com/ Boston, Massachusetts - November 16 https://www.ticketmaster.com/event/0100648FA1C21706 Nashville, Tennessee - November 20 https://www.eventbrite.com/e/daily-stoic-live-onstage-with-ryan-holiday-tickets-1991992836196?aff=oddtdtcreator Philadelphia, Pennsylvania - December 8 https://www.eventbrite.com/e/daily-stoic-live-onstage-with-ryan-holiday-tickets-1987339339462?aff=oddtdtcreator Washington D. C. - December 9 https://www.unionstagepresents.com/shows/daily-stoic-live-09-dec 🎙️AD-FREE https://dailystoic.supercast.com/| Support the podcast and go deeper into Stoicism by subscribing toThe Daily Stoic Premium https://dailystoic.supercast.com/ - unlock ad-free listening, early access, and bonus content:https://dailystoic.supercast.com/ ✉️ FREE STOIC WISDOM https://dailystoic.com/dailyemail | Want Stoic wisdom delivered to your inbox daily? Sign up for the FREE Daily Stoic email athttps://dailystoic.com/dailyemail Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy https://acast.com/privacy for more information.

• 0:00Speaker 00

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• 0:45Speaker 00

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• 1:14Speaker 00

  It might not seem like much, but it may well be the hardest thing to do in the world. When tensions are high, when political dysfunction spills out into the streets, when anger and frustration abound, when misinformation and extremism and utter nonsense pervades, when cruelty and meanness become acceptable, when the system is falling apart and the center looks like it may not hold. Your job is simple. Don't become a lunatic. Don't let it infect you. Don't let it make you lose your mind. Marcus Aurelius had to do this in the terror of the plague. He had to do this during a coup attempt. Think of Cicero during those civil wars. Think of Chrysippus telling himself that the whole point of being a philosopher was not to join in with the mob and the rabble. They were holding out. It's not that they were disengaged.

• 1:58Speaker 00

  They were very engaged. It's that they strove not to be consumed by the passions that had wrecked their society. Lincoln had to strike a very similar balance. He knew that slavery was wrong and knew that a good chunk of people were hell-bent on destroying the country. He also knew that he could not afford anything other than calmness, foresight, and clarity. He could not lose his humanity. He could not lose his mind. And neither can you. As we said recently, we can't let bad times turn us into bad people. The winds may howl, but we must not be swept away. We must remain good. We must remain sane. This is our main job. And look, your other main job is to vote. Go vote. Don't be a lunatic. Don't be infected.

• 2:42Speaker 00

  Make a smart, educated, stoic decision. You might be saying, who are you talking about? You know who I'm talking about. Make the right decision. Do the right thing. Think of Marcus Aurelius's celebration to Antoninus, what he learned from him, what he felt Antoninus embodied. And then tell yourself, who's the opposite of that in almost every way? That's today's message. I'll leave it there.

• 3:16Speaker 00

  Today's entry, Accepting What Is. Reinhold Niebuhr's Serenity Prayer is a mantra for many. "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change." It reads, "Courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference." The Stoics wanted to push past simply accepting what is. They wanted us to be grateful and happy with what is. Epictetus taught that we get a well-flowing life when we wish for what is going to happen, not for what we want to happen. And Marcus Aurelius adds that we should meet anything that comes our way with gratitude,

• 3:57Speaker 00

  not, "I wish this was different and I'll tolerate it, but I'm glad it happened this way. It's for the best." So let us try that on for size this week. And we have two quotes from Epictetus and one from Marcus Aurelius. "Don't seek for everything to happen as you wish it would, but rather wish that everything happens as it actually will, and then your life will flow well." That's Epictetus's Incoridion 8. And then from the Discourses 1:12, he says, "To be truly educated means this: learning to wish that each thing happens exactly as it does." Marcus Aurelius's Meditation 9:6, "All you need are these: certainty of judgment in

• 4:40Speaker 00

  the present moment, action for the common good in the present moment, and an attitude of gratitude in the present moment for anything that comes your way." One thing I wanted to point out, because I was fascinated to learn this, is the Serenity Prayer. One, it sounds like some sort of real hymn or prayer that must go back thousands of years. Honestly, it sounds like something that could come from the Stoics. And then obviously, a lot of people associate it with recovery movement, which it has become a big part of. But it really dates to like the 30s and 40s. They think that he composed the prayer somewhere around the time of 1932, 1933, which for

• 5:24Speaker 00

  some context is in the midst of the Great Depression. But again, one of the benefits of wisdom is that it is both timely and timeless at the same time. So this idea of the prayer, "Father, give us courage to change what must be altered, serenity to accept what cannot be helped, and insight to know one from another." Also, I think the difference between that, as he first writes it, and then what it sort of commonly gets rendered out is also a sign of, as Twain says, the difference between lightning and a lightning bug. Like just the perfect wording of it, the perfect encapsulation of the wisdom. It feels, as soon as you see it, even though, you know, it's as old as some people's grandparents

• 6:08Speaker 00

  who are listening to this, or perhaps some people who are listening to this themselves, they may be well older than that short little prayer, but it feels as current and fresh and also as ageless and timeless as just about anything. But anyways, let's not nerd out too much on the history of the prayer. What I thought I would focus on today, because we've been talking about acceptance quite a lot here on the podcast, I tend to disagree a little bit with Epictetus. I find that Epictetus's life was so tragic and painful. His name literally means like enslaved. We know almost nothing about his family. We know nothing about his existence, except that he's born a slave.

• 6:51Speaker 00

  He has a cruel master who tortures him. He walks for a limp the rest of his life. And then after 30 years of slavery and eventually getting his freedom, Epictetus is exiled by a cruel emperor. So it is a hard life. But I find it striking that nowhere in Epictetus's writings, does he really question whether any of it was right or fair? Whether anything could be done about it? Now, you might say this is him reaching this sort of sage-like level of wisdom. And I think there's truth to that. I mean, who am I to question, obviously, such a great and brave and enduring spirit? But I guess, obviously, we live in a world now where people have more agency.

• 7:35Speaker 00

  And why do we have that agency? Because people were willing to fight for it and change. So obviously, the Stoics are mostly right, that so much of what happens in this world is outside of our control. We should accept it, resenting it, crying over it, whining about it, simply wishing it was otherwise does not do anything. Look, you were born five foot three instead of six foot three. That's just a reality. You're going to have to accept it, right? People in your family go bald, you're going to have to accept it, right? Your spouse turned out to be a jerk. They ran away with all your money. He left you, broke your heart. It happened, right? That is true. But I just don't want Epictetus to be misinterpreted as some sort of rationalization or acceptance

• 8:17Speaker 00

  of profound injustices, including the injustices that Epictetus seemed relatively okay accepting, right? As they say, "Progress depends on the unreasonable man." I talk about this a little bit in the Courage book. We have to be accepting. We have to face unflinchingly the reality of our situation. But even as I read this paragraph that I have written, I would push back on it a little bit. And I do think it's important that we focus on what we're going to do about the situations that we find ourselves in. I feel like Epictetus could have done that a bit more himself. Still, obviously, a great man, better man than I. Certainly, I could not have endured what he endured. But it's just a thought today, and I want you to be okay pushing back and questioning things from the Stoics as well.

• 9:02Speaker 00

  They weren't perfect. They were products of their time. They were products of their own experiences. And we can challenge and debate and argue with them as long as we think we're getting them closer to what they actually mean, what the wisdom of the Stoics actually mean. And that's today's message.

• 9:25Speaker 01

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