Pod Insights The Daily Stoic | Wondery+ BONUS | Self-Awareness vs. Self-Consciousness: Do You Know the Difference? About this episode What’s the difference between self-awareness and self-consciousness? In today’s bonus episode, Ryan shares an excerpt from his conversation with high-performance expert Steve Magness https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rKhlm3aLREI on how to spot the difference.
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Transcript Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.
0:05 Ryan Holiday? Welcome to the Daily Stoic Podcast, where each day we bring you a Stoic-inspired meditation, designed to help you find strength and insight and wisdom into everyday life. Each one of these episodes is based on the 2,000-year-old philosophy that has guided some of history's greatest men and women, help you learn from them, to follow in their example, and to start your day off with a little dose of courage and discipline and justice and wisdom. For more, visit DailyStoic.com.
0:56 Ryan Holiday? What do you think the difference between self-awareness is and self-consciousness? Because self-consciousness strikes me as the enemy of almost all kinds of elite performance, creativity, etc. When you're in your own head of like, how are the, you know, that's the enemy. And yet, also, like, a lack of self-awareness is the downfall of so many people.
1:16 Speaker 01 I think it's curiosity versus a threat.
1:19 Ryan Holiday? Okay.
1:20 Speaker 01 So curiosity is self-awareness, where you're exploring. You're like, okay, what internally does this feel like? What's the experience like? When it's that self-conscious, it's that threat, where you're sitting there being like, does this feel right? Is this how it's supposed to be? And you can see this, again, athletes, if you look at elite athletes, is there better at reading their internal signals? So, you know, understanding whether a feeling of pain in the muscle is pain that means injury, or it just means fatigue, or, you know, I'm working harder. They can distinguish that stuff really well.
2:01 Speaker 01 But it gets to that self-conscious versus self-awareness that can easily translate. Where you start being like too conscious of it of especially if you started to have poor performance where you start saying, oh, that signals that I'm about to slow down and I'm not even at halfway, even if it doesn't, you start getting the wrong message because like it's almost tapped into this threat mode. So it's, it's a very fine line, I think.
2:30 Ryan Holiday? Well, the irony of self-consciousness is that it's actually not so much about you as it is about what other people think of you.
2:36 Speaker 01 Yep.
2:36 Ryan Holiday? And so if you're like, well, like imposter syndrome is self-consciousness, right? You're not, you're not actually thinking so much about, am I a fraud?
2:45 Speaker 01 Yep.
2:45 Ryan Holiday? You're thinking, do other people think that I am a fraud? Of course, they're not thinking about you at all. Uh, this is just all in your head. But yeah, self, self-awareness is more an introspective understanding of the self. Why do I do this? What does this mean? What is this like versus self-consciousness, which is like, if I do this, are they going to laugh at me?
3:07 Speaker 01 Yep.
3:07 Ryan Holiday? Is this pretentious? You know, or whatever, like you're, but, but it's about how what you're going to do is going to be received or is being received. Or you're thinking about what you're doing as you're doing it, like you're in the audience watching you as a spectator instead of being in your body, which was probably more of what self-awareness is trying to, to do for you.
3:28 Speaker 01 Absolutely. I think that's a perfect way to explain it. And again, tie it back to choking. One of the world's greatest sports psychologists told me, he said essentially, I've got the quote in the book, but I'll butcher it slightly. But he's essentially, the essence is you feel the pressure, cortisol, stress go up. You get self-conscious, you start overthinking.
3:49 Ryan Holiday? Yeah.
3:50 Speaker 01 And then it's over.
3:51 Ryan Holiday? Yeah.
3:51 Speaker 01 And I think it's, it's, what I mean is like that self-consciousness is like, you go from like, oh, I feel a little bit different. And instead of being curious about what that means.
4:02 Ryan Holiday? Yeah.
4:03 Speaker 01 You start thinking like, oh. Everybody's gonna know.
4:06 Ryan Holiday? Yes.
4:07 Speaker 01 Everybody's gonna know I don't have it. And I'm gonna be embarrassed because I'm supposed to do this, this and this. And now I'm gonna be back here doing this X, Y and Z. And that causes your brain to start going on like this ruminating catastrophizing cycle.
4:23 Ryan Holiday? Yeah, we're like, this is a big game. This is so important. This is my only chance versus the what I have to do here is X.
4:31 Speaker 01 And if you look at it, that translates to your actions. Because what happens as an expert performer? You've taken stuff that used to be conscious.
4:42 Ryan Holiday? Yeah.
4:42 Speaker 01 Right? When you learned how to throw a ball, someone probably taught you, you know, you've got to do this.
4:47 Ryan Holiday? The mechanics.
4:48 Speaker 01 You know, you gotta do the mechanics. Once you become an expert, you're not thinking this is what my elbow does. And this is where my release, you've got it ingrained.
4:57 Ryan Holiday? Yeah.
4:58 Speaker 01 But what research tells us is that once we get that pressure, that expectations, that self consciousness, it's almost like we revert to being a beginner and we start going segment by segment. And what happens is that formerly smooth process.
5:11 Ryan Holiday? Yeah.
5:12 Speaker 01 Now doesn't work. And it's the same in other things. I mean, it's the same in writing. What happens when you try and force yourself like to do it?
5:20 Ryan Holiday? Yeah.
5:20 Speaker 01 It backfires.
5:26 Ryan Holiday? Hey, it's Ryan. Thank you for listening to the Daily Stoic Podcast. I just wanted to say we so appreciate it. We love serving you. It's amazing to us that over 30 million people have downloaded these episodes in the couple of years we've been doing it. It's an honor. Please spread the word, tell people about it. And this isn't to sell anything. I just wanted to say thank you.
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