How I stopped eating chocolate at night. What are you REALLY hungry for?

Chocolate at night can feel like a switch flips and suddenly you are “out of control.” I don’t buy that story anymore. What’s really happening is your brain and body are trying to meet a need the fastest way they know how, and sugar just happens to be the most available tool. We walk through a simple coaching framework grounded in psychology research. I share my own history of overeating sweets, the shame and exhaustion that came with it, and what finally made the cravings fade without const...

• 0:09Speaker 00

  So let's dive in. Guys, I'm thinking about studying my podcasts in some new ways. If you have any ideas, feel free to get in touch. [email protected] or on Instagram, Angela Brain Body Coach, Angela Brain Body Coach. And hey guys, welcome to another episode of Change Wired, where we do our best to learn about and then apply this knowledge into our lives to figure out how to unlock more of our potential, how to grow consistently and expand our life experience as we live it

• 0:51Speaker 00

  with more positive impact in the world and just more joy every day. Today, guys, you're gonna learn how to eat chocolate. Well, actually, how to eat less chocolate at night. You know, for quite some time, for a decade of my life, and it was more than a decade ago, I used to struggle with emotional eating, probably somewhere from my teenage years till my mid twenties.

• 1:22Speaker 00

  And I learned how to not do that. And since I got the skills, which one of the key skills you're gonna learn about today. Just one question, so stay tuned. So I learned the skills and after that, all overeating stopped completely. Even on holidays, on birthdays, on special celebrations, or when I'm in this amazing restaurant or all you can eat buffet in Turkey with all these little sweets and things like staring at you, some of the best creations of some great chefs. I just don't overeat and I completely lost all of my sweet cravings.

• 2:08Speaker 00

  Even though I was the person who used to joke that I inherited my huge sweet tooth from my dad, who can still drink a whole can of sweetened condensed milk in one sitting. Like, I was the same person. I remember there was one birthday when I was about eighteen years old. When I asked my friends and family to buy me chocolate, really good chocolate for my birthday. And I got like, I don't know, almost two kilos of that. And I ate more than a kilo in one day. One day with like no tea in between, no food, just ate chocolate the whole day. And I didn't even feel that sick the next day. I was in a pretty good place.

• 2:54Speaker 00

  All that to say that, you know, eating sweets, having cravings, emotional eating, overeating. That's been a struggle for me for a good decade, like so much energy went into that. And then the same energy, you know, I would have guilt trips and I would not feel good about my body and about myself. And I always felt like betrayed myself. And then also, you know, all the other stuff that I was supposed to deal with my life, that didn't disappear. And so there was like a whole thing. And then it would be much harder to, it was much harder for me to maintain my ideal weight and my fitness and my health. You know, thanks God, I was young back then, so I did not have a lot of side effects.

• 3:39Speaker 00

  And I was also very active, but I did not get the results that I wanted. And plus all the shame and the guilt and not having great sleep after eating all the chocolate. And the next day feeling like I needed to over out exercise that. And somehow then I needed to be really strict with my diet. Like, you know, all this like dynamics that I didn't need to have and couldn't, couldn't instead invested into working on my life. But anyhow, by the end of this podcast, again, guys, you're gonna get a glimpse, maybe a much needed insight and a very practical psychology research based tool. Simple question that will help you to start dealing with your cravings,

• 4:23Speaker 00

  whether that's cravings for chocolates or cookies or ice cream, overeating that at night. You're gonna learn how to start dealing with that in a way that will transform your life and your personality and your skills of self-regulation, emotional regulation, stress and nervous system regulation that all of us need, not just with food. Food is just, you know, one playground. We need the skills to deal with all other more important areas of our lives, like our relationships, like fulfillment, like purpose, like our work, career, our calling.

• 5:04Speaker 00

  So the skill will upgrade you and your life in so many ways when you decide to truly start practicing it, putting that into your daily routines and habits and practice and with the purpose to improve, not to get it perfect from day one. It took a while for me to learn the skill and apply it and change my cravings and overeating habits. So let's dive in. First, let's start with a story, a real story from a real conversation that happened not that long ago with a friend of mine. He asked, you know, there is one thing I wanted to ask you.

• 5:47Speaker 00

  It's about food. I've dialed in all the macros and stuff, but I still eat chocolate at night and I'd like to stop. And I don't know how, it's been a while. What would you recommend as a coach?

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  And I asked him, is it the chocolate you actually need? What do you think? You see, guys, in coaching, we work with a simple framework grounded in psychology research. A simple understanding that every behavior, every habit serves a need, a need that you truly have.

• 6:28Speaker 00

  The behavior that you choose, like eating chocolate, it might not serve you the best. Chocolate at night usually comes with side effects. You'd rather skip like weight gain or sleep or metabolic health, guilt trips, stomach ache sometimes, stomach you'd rather not have. But it gives you something you want in the moment as well. And I want you to understand this, to really think about that. And it's not hunger. Let's be honest, most of us walk around with more food in us than we'll ever need. Most of us are not, especially if you are listening to this podcast, you're probably not starving of malnutrition or insufficient nutrition, but overnutrition.

• 7:12Speaker 00

  So what's the need underneath the chocolate craving? If it's not hunger. And hey, let's be honest, nobody's chocolate addicted. You might have, like your body might use to certain amount of sugar or dynamics, but nobody's addicted to chocolate. So start with this question, what's the need underneath the chocolate craving? What do you actually need? Start with this question with genuine curiosity. That's where I started back then. Not with discipline, not with willpowering your way past the pine tree. Curiosity. What is it that you need?

• 7:53Speaker 00

  I used to have, again, emotional eating episodes for like a decade. Bags of cookies at night, eating until my stomach hurt. I would literally eat till it hurts.

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  I was going through a lot at that point and I didn't realize that, but it was a lot. And I didn't know how to think through that, communicate that. I didn't have much support, like I didn't know how to handle stress, intense emotions or my complex and certain life. I was lonely, scared, traveling the world without a clear direction, without support, without any idea what's gonna come next. So I ate cookies. Hey, for a moment, they gave me the comfort, the relief, something to hold on to you, something to smile about, something to enjoy.

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  Hey, for a moment, they gave me all that. But was it the cookies that I actually needed? Guys, was it the cookies? Never.

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  But they were the best option that I had, that I knew about, that solved the need, that solved the problem, that made things better. And for a few hours, they helped me, they helped me to keep going.

• 9:12Speaker 00

  And then I did the work with coaching certifications and my life experiences. I was lucky. Good books, reading a lot of good books helped. Like self-awareness, self-growth, emotional nervous system regulation skills, my thinking habits, my mindset, body, mind and soul. I built good relationships, real nourishing support.

• 9:39Speaker 00

  And now it's been over a decade since I've needed quote-unquote food therapy. Isn't that what it is, guys? Food therapy. The cheapest we can get, the fastest we can get, any time of the day or the night.

• 9:55Speaker 00

  I learned back then to meet my actual needs in ways that nourish instead of numbing, in ways, in ways that allowed me to serve the real problems, not the fast, quick emotional uplift. No side effects, no extra calories, no willpower, no belly fat. I learned to solve my actual needs in the way that they needed to be solved.

• 10:26Speaker 00

  So, how do you stop eating that chocolate at night? Back to that question.

• 10:33Speaker 00

  You learn to give yourself what you are actually craving. And, yeah, let's be honest here. It won't be as fast, as easy, as simple as opening a box of chocolates. I wish. It will take time, it will take work and effort. But also, it will give you a lot more than a few minutes of comfort. It will change you, it will grow you, it will expand your life. Can a cookie promise that? Can a bar of chocolate, even if it's the best chocolate in the world, can that promise you? Can it promise you that?

• 11:14Speaker 00

  So what is it you actually need? And that is the question. What is it, guys? What is it you actually need? And what needs to get done in order for you to start fulfilling that need, that desire, that craving? Right? So what's underneath that chocolate craving? And that is where I'd start working on your eating chocolate at night, or cookies, or that glass of wine, or binge watching Netflix, or scrolling. What it is you need? Go get that.

• 11:57Speaker 00

  Thank you, guys, for tuning in. Thank you for listening. Please share this podcast episode with at least one other person who you think, hey, that might be really, really useful, that might help them. Even if that person is you. Send this podcast episode to your WhatsApp. But also rate, review on different platforms, platforms where you get your podcasts, because it helps to spread this podcast, to deliver this podcast to more ears around the world. We are a global podcast in more than 11,000 cities around the world, and almost all continents, except maybe Antarctica. So please help to spread good stuff around, so we all could thrive

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  and live with more joy and true fulfillment.

• 12:45Speaker 00

  Thank you, guys, for tuning in, for learning, for trying to get better. And till next time, keep growing. And don't forget to ask this question, honestly ask it, what it is that you actually need, besides that chocolate?