Pod Insights British Scandal The Warring Queens | Marry in Haste | 2 About this episode Determined to strengthen her claim to England’s throne, Mary's desperate to get hitched. But while Mary gains an heir, her disastrous choice of suitor sets off a calamitous chain of events.
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Transcript 7,993 words · 11 speakers
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0:00 Alice Levine? Audible subscribers can listen to all episodes of British Scandal ad-free right now. Join Audible today by downloading the Audible app.
0:07 Matt Forde? Just a warning at the start: this episode contains a fair bit of filth.
0:12 Alice Levine? Yeah, we just sort of lost our minds, didn't we?
0:14 Matt Forde? This is audio soft porn, really. Enjoy.
0:23 Matt Forde? January 1566, Holyrood Palace, Scotland. Lord Henry Darnley's heart hammers in his chest as he leads fifty armed lords through the corridors. He stops at the door of Mary's private apartments, grips the hilt of his dagger, raises his other hand to halt the lords, hoping they can't see how much he's trembling. Today, we change Scotland for the better. He gives a nod. Watches one of the lords kick the door open. Darnley leads the charge into the room, his eyes searching for Mary. He fixes on her at a table with her secretary, her auburn locks loose on her shoulders.
1:06 Matt Forde? Her hand flies to her protruding belly as her ladies huddle around her, looking terrified. He hears her voice crack as she speaks. My husband, wha-what is this? Darnley pushes his chest out, clears his throat. I have reason to believe you've been conducting relations with this man. He points a trembling finger towards her secretary, who shuffles towards the door. Mary's face clouds with confusion. Darnley feels a prickly of guilt. He ignores it. He must stick to the plan. But as he steps towards her, a piercing scream echoes through the room. Darnley spins round, his eyes widen in horror as he takes in the secretary,
1:51 Matt Forde? now on his knees, a dagger buried in his back. A chill runs down his spine as another lord rips the dagger from the man's back and strikes a second blow. Darnley sees Mary try to reach for him, only for someone to roughly pull her from her chair. Darnley freezes as the man points a gun at her stomach. No, wait, my heir!
2:15 Matt Forde? Do not be fooled, Your Majesty. The child is a bastard.
2:20 Matt Forde? Darnley forces a nod. He stares at Mary, who eyeballs him with pure hatred. You will go to hell for such lies!
2:32 Matt Forde? Darnley swallows hard. He cannot show any weakness now. He struggles to hide his revulsion, as the nobles pass the dagger to each other, striking the secretary like frenzied animals. Blood sprays across Mary's gown, her face. Then, another one of the lords turns his way.
2:53 Matt Forde? You must make the final move. You must do it, as our king.
3:00 Matt Forde? Darnley feels bile bubble up in his throat. His eyes move to Mary's ghost-white face. All he wants to do is run to her, tell her he's sorry. As our king. The word hangs there. Darnley knows he can't betray any hint of weakness. He takes the dagger. It's warm, sticky.
3:27 Matt Forde? The secretary looks up at him, betrayed. Then Darnley plunges the blade into the man's chest. There's silence.
3:37 Matt Forde? Darnley meets Mary's gaze again, this time with defiance. You are deposed, Mary, on grounds of adultery. I will be the king of Scotland now.
3:55 Matt Forde? From Audible, I'm Matt Ford.
3:57 Alice Levine? And I'm Alice Levine.
3:58 Matt Forde? And this is British Scandal.
4:13 Matt Forde? Alice, give me your thoughts so far on Mary, Queen of Scots.
4:16 Alice Levine? Okay, she's smart, she's ambitious, obviously, charismatic. She's a Catholic queen ruling a Protestant country, so she has to be bold. She obviously has to have a serious backbone and self-belief. But as well as that, this kind of hardened steeliness, she is a bit of a romantic, totally heartbroken when her husband dies. And then she wants to find a new husband, but not just anyone. You know, she wants to have a connection and she seems to sort of believe in love.
4:45 Matt Forde? Yes, and this is all in the context of her relationship with her cousin, our great and noble Queen Elizabeth I.
4:52 Alice Levine? Yes, of course. So her ultimate goal is to dethrone Elizabeth, to become more powerful than her. But as we learnt last episode, she can no longer rely on this sisterly bond to shore up her future. And so she's in a really vulnerable position. She's isolated as this Catholic queen. She's a bit of an island because she's surrounded by Protestant lords plotting for her demise. So the only way that she can see to proceed is to somehow find a husband who's ideally English, but also on the checklist, hopefully he's Catholic, which obviously would put her on safer ground. But as we know, these men don't behave as you want them to behave. You know, Dudley has already wreaked havoc with her relationship with Elizabeth.
5:35 Alice Levine? She needs to find somebody that she can manipulate and give her an heir.
5:39 Matt Forde? Yes, so Mary just needs a husband who can give her an heir, strengthen the Scottish crown, and ideally claim the English one. Dating has never been so easy. This is episode two, Marry in Haste.
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7:00 Matt Forde? One year earlier, February 1565, the Great Hall, Wemis Castle, Scotland.
7:12 Matt Forde? Mary raises her gilded mask, peers through the narrow eye holes, and surveys her latest guests dancing in the warm torchlight.
7:22 Matt Forde? Mary's advisor whispers in her ear. He is the Duke of Longville, Your Majesty. Estates in Normandy. Strong ties to the Spanish court. Mary raises an eyebrow at the man's impressive physique. Then he turns. The man is older than her uncle, at least 50. She eyeballs her advisor, who dismisses the duke with a curt wave. For months, Mary's been holding grand balls and banquets, intent on finding a husband who will strengthen her grip on Scotland and provide an heir to help her take her cousin's crown in England. But every prospect either bores or repels her.
8:03 Matt Forde? She hands her empty goblet to a passing servant, deciding to retire. As she turns to go, the musicians strike up a galliard. Mary looks up to find a six-foot-tall man standing before her. She takes in his broad shoulders and narrow waist, the light brown wavy hair that brushes his shoulders. His blue eyes hold her gaze with an intensity that makes her heart skip. Can I say, I think we should have more of this in British Scandal. I really enjoyed reading that out.
8:32 Alice Levine? Yeah, it was sexy as hell, wasn't it?
8:34 Matt Forde? Do you think as you get older, you're more into that sort of thing or not?
8:37 Alice Levine? You're older and you're deeply aroused, so you tell me.
8:41 Alice Levine? Also, I feel like this is a lovely illustration of how beauty, norms and ideals change.
8:46 Matt Forde? So this man was described by Mary as the most attractive long man she'd ever seen. And he was known around society at the time as a cock chick.
8:59 Alice Levine? A cock chick?
9:00 Matt Forde? Yes, a cock chick means that he had slightly feminine looks.
9:07 Matt Forde? The man bows. Beside him, an older man steps forward.
9:12 Matt Forde? Your Majesty, my son, Lord Henry Darnley.
9:17 Matt Forde? Mary sucks in her breath as Darnley straightens. Would your Majesty honour me with this dance? Mary allows him to lead her away. She gasps at his high athletic leaps.
9:32 Matt Forde? He draws eyes from all over the room. Her stomach flips as Darnley grabs her waist and lifts her clean off the floor, turning her so fast her skirts fan out around them. She leans, breathless against him.
9:48 Matt Forde? You dance well, my lord. As does your Majesty. Perhaps our talent runs in the blood. We are cousins after all.
9:58 Alice Levine? I didn't know it could get sexier.
10:00 Matt Forde? That was the chapline of the day. I believe we're related.
10:03 Alice Levine? I love that you've got grandma's eyes.
10:09 Matt Forde? She takes in his two dimples.
10:12 Matt Forde? Tell me more about yourself, Lord Darnley. She listens as he whisks her around the ballroom and tells her that he is nineteen and Catholic and has no interest in politics nor power. I find all that a terrible bore. It's my father's thing, not mine. Mary's spine tingles as he pulls her close. If you were my queen, my only concern would be keeping you satisfied. Mary jumps as her advisor appears at her elbow and steers her gently aside.
10:45 Matt Forde? Your Majesty, I am sorry. Lord Darnley's father had no business bringing him here. Mary moves her gaze back to Darnley, who's laughing with a courtier now. What do you mean? He's perfect. It is true that he is high in the line of English succession, Your Majesty, but he is known in the English court for his immaturity in drinking. There has also been talk of... sexual excesses. Mary's heart sinks. And his father has made it clear he will only allow a marriage if his son is made king rather than a consort, to riddle alongside you with full regal authority.
11:29 Alice Levine? Who the hell do they think they are?
11:31 Matt Forde? They negotiate hard, they leap high, and they have excessive sex.
11:38 Matt Forde? Mary stiffens. Sharing her crown is unthinkable. But returning her gaze to Darnley, her shoulders relax. This man has no desire to rule. He would be king in name only. What would Elizabeth make of such a match? I'm quite sure she would be furious. It could reignite tensions. Mary holds her hand up to silence him. Sharing power would be a small price to pay for what she would gain. Prepare a place for Lord Darnley at tomorrow's hunt. Across the hall, Darnley smiles. Mary holds his gaze. Let Elizabeth be furious. If he can give her a son with a stronger claim than any Tudor alive,
12:23 Matt Forde? then Lord Darnley might just be her ticket to securing Elizabeth's throne.
12:36 Matt Forde? Five months later, July 1565, the Great Hall, Holyrood Palace.
12:44 Matt Forde? Lord Darnley takes a large swig from his goblet of wine and rises to his feet. My lords! The chatter and laughter continues to bounce around the walls. Darnley eyes his father, whose clenched fists betray his disdain. He hears him whisper.
13:04 Matt Forde? A king doesn't ask, be a man. Darnley swallows and raises his voice. My lords, a toast! Still, they ignore him. To Darnley's horror, his father slams his own goblet down so hard on the oak banquet table, the room falls silent. Please silence for your new king! Darnley hides his mortification. He presses his crown into his head, feels his nerves calm, as Mary places a hand upon his and smiles. To, um, to my queen, whose beauty almost makes up for all the stern-faced Protestant counsellors I'm now forced to endure!
13:49 Matt Forde? Darnley expects laughter. Instead, he's met with silence.
13:55 Matt Forde? Darnley's thrown when Mary rises. My husband jests, of course. Darnley feels his cheeks flush. To Scotland, and to her king and queen, united!
14:09 Matt Forde? Darnley slumps into his chair. He flinches as his father hisses in his ear. Get a grip, boy!
14:19 Matt Forde? Later, in Mary's chamber, Darnley paces as she removes her jewellery. Your counsellors defer to you, but they have no respect for my crown. Because I commend them! He watches her move towards him. Tonight is our wedding night. Let us not speak of this now.
14:39 Alice Levine? No business, just business.
14:42 Matt Forde? And just before we get down to it, I do like to talk about how to motivate stakeholders.
14:47 Alice Levine? Now, get your tits out!
14:56 Matt Forde? I don't think I've heard "get your tits out" for about 20 years.
14:59 Alice Levine? You forget, I'm a retro misogynist.
15:02 Matt Forde? Darnley feels his anxiety drain away as Mary touches his cheek, her wanton eyes beguiling him. In this room, you can have all the power you like. Darnley's eyes lower as Mary's dress slips from her shoulders. He kisses her neck, is thrilled by her hungry response. This is the first time he's felt in control all day. He moves his lips to her ear, whispers, "Anyone who disrespects me, will you punish them? Show them I'm in charge." He notes the flash of surprise that crosses her face. "Henry, I..." Darnley leans forward again and kisses her neck. "It would invigorate me in every regard."
15:48 Matt Forde? Darnley moves to Mary's collarbone. He smiles as her breath quickens. "I'll do anything you want." He watches Mary's eyes flutter closed. "Say I'm in charge, that the lords will be punished." He feels her shoulders soften. "You're in charge, I will punish the lords." A rush of triumph surges through Darnley. He might not yet command the respect he deserves at court, but he's always known his way around the bedroom. If he can use those skills to control his new queen, he's sure it will only be a matter of time before he controls Scotland too.
16:32 Matt Forde? So by being a good shag, he's going to become king? That is literally a fairer system than the hereditary system we have. At least there's some merit involved. Let's just say the king or queen is just the top shagger of the day.
16:45 Alice Levine? Producer Chica is saying something quite valid right now, which is, "How do you know that King Charles isn't a top shag?"
16:51 Matt Forde? I'm just guessing. I'm just guessing that maybe he's not.
16:54 Alice Levine? You think he's a pillow princess?
16:56 Matt Forde? Is that a phrase?
16:57 Alice Levine? You just lie there.
16:59 Matt Forde? Pillow princess! Oh my word!
17:03 Alice Levine? I can't believe you're saying King Charles is a pillow princess.
17:05 Matt Forde? I'm not saying that, I'm just saying he doesn't strike me as particularly. But maybe I've underestimated him. I mean, there's only one way for me to find this out, and that's for Charles to accept my challenge.
17:16 Matt Forde? And let me watch.
17:17 Alice Levine? Oh my god.
17:22 Matt Forde? Fünf Monate später, Dezember 1565, Holyrood Palace. Mary korrigiert die Krimisen-Gauke, um mehr Dekolletage zu zeigen. Der König findet dich unmöglich zu besiegen, Your Majesty. Mary prüft sich in ihrem Augenblick. Sie sieht, dass Darnley mehr Kontrolle über seine Kanzlerinnen und Kanzlerinnen und Kanzler hat und seine Vertrauen hat sich als Ergebnis erhöht. Unwahrscheinlich, so hat er auch sein Getränk. Das bedeutet, weniger Zeit in seiner Kost, und weniger Möglichkeit, ein wertvolles Heer zu produzieren, um England zu behaupten. Es ist zu lange, dass er meine Küche besucht hat. Ich verliere seine Attributen.
18:08 Matt Forde? 据我们的研究，不光是有一个，他也有一个巨大的屁股.
18:13 Alice Levine? Können wir das sagen?
18:15 Matt Forde? Ja.
18:15 Alice Levine? Okay, cool.
18:16 Matt Forde? Es ist ein Kompliment, nicht wahr?
18:18 Alice Levine? Was, ein großes Bett?
18:19 Matt Forde? Eines. Du gibst ihm eine Hand und, weißt du, braucht es zwei, um es zu halten.
18:26 Matt Forde? Mary sieht die Damen bewusst. Und sie verschwenden in Gelächter.
18:33 Matt Forde? Mary geht durch den Hallen
18:36 Matt Forde? und tötet die Tür in Darnley's Zimmer. Seine lustige Grüße vorbereitet. Mein König, ich möchte meinen most-kräftigen Scepter sehen. Mary friert. Darnley ist auf der Kost, seine blutige Knochen um die der neuesten Hausmitarbeiter. Mary blinkt, momentan gefroren. Seine Mund öffnet sich, als ein anderer Körper von unter den Schatten entsteht. Eines seiner Ehemanns, auch blutig. Was ist das? Mary's Augen fokussiert sich auf Darnley. Seine Vision schrumpft. Rache klingelt auf der Spine, als sie über jede Entschuldigung denkt. Dass er zu müde oder zu beschäftigt war, um zu ihrer Kost zu kommen.
19:21 Matt Forde? Mary backs out of the room, tears blurring her vision. She runs blindly through the corridors, Darnley's voice echoing after her.
19:30 Matt Forde? Please, Mary, wait!
19:33 Matt Forde? She doesn't look back. She keeps running until she reaches her chamber.
19:39 Matt Forde? Sobbs rack her body as she slams the door.
19:42 Matt Forde? Mary, I beg you, please, let me explain.
19:46 Matt Forde? Mary leans against the wall as her ladies rush over. Nausea rises up through her chest, then her legs buckle and give way beneath her.
19:58 Matt Forde? Half an hour later, Mary blinks her eyelids awake and slowly makes out a physician leaning over her. She turns to her left to see Darnley is beside him, and he's beaming.
20:10 Matt Forde? My darling, I have the most wonderful news! You're with child!
20:17 Matt Forde? Mary feels warmth flood her body. Pregnant? I'm... I'm pregnant? She instinctively moves her palm onto her belly, then Darnley places his hand on hers, and memory strikes.
20:34 Matt Forde? The betrayal, the humiliation. She pulls her hand away.
20:39 Matt Forde? I am so sorry for my aberration. It will never happen again.
20:46 Matt Forde? Mary's jaw locks as a coolness takes hold. Darnley has made a fool of her. She cannot forgive that. And now there's an heir on the way. She doesn't need to. Instead, she's going to get revenge, in the cruelest way possible.
21:10 Matt Forde? Two weeks later, January 1566, Edinburgh. Darnley enters his chambers to find his valet by his dresser, holding a small gift box.
21:21 Matt Forde? Your Majesty, the Queen's secretary delivered this.
21:27 Matt Forde? Darnley feels his heart swell. Mary hasn't let him near her since she discovered his indiscretion. This present can only mean one thing: he's finally forgiven.
21:39 Matt Forde? He snatches the box and opens it. His smile widens as he takes in a roll of freshly minted coins. Last month, Darnley proposed his portrait should be made bigger than Mary's on Scotland's money, as befits a king's status. When Darnley pulls a coin out, his stomach drops. His face has been made... Smaller. His hand trembles as he turns it over to find his name now appears under the Queen's, not above.
22:10 Matt Forde? What is the meaning of this? But his valet has gone. Darnley balls his fist around the coin and stomps down the corridor to Mary's chamber. He finds her snapping at one of her counsellors. I have no wish for further discussion. You are dismissed. Darnley waits for the lord to leave. He's unnerved as Mary's stern expression morphs into a serene smile. My love, I thought I would see you this morning.
22:39 Matt Forde? Darnley holds the coin up. What is the meaning of this, Mary? As king, I should be... He stops as Mary steps forward, her smile tightening. Well, that's just it. You are no longer king. Darnley's mouth goes bone dry. You cannot do that. We made a proclamation. Proclamations can be unmade. This will offer clear instruction to the people to treat you accordingly. Mary, you're having my child. I realise I wronged you, but I love you and you love me. Don't do this. Darnley stays on her, eyes imploring her. He will be a laughingstock in court.
23:23 Matt Forde? He'll never be able to face his father again. For a brief moment, he's sure he sees a flicker of indecision cross her face. Then she jerks her hands from his, stiffens. You have fulfilled your purpose. From now on, we are no more than queen and consort. Darnley feels the room spin. He's been reduced to no more than a breeding stud.
23:50 Matt Forde? He slams out and is startled to find the dismissed councillor lingering in the corridor. A bitterness hits Darnley's throat as the man turns a newly minted coin between his fingers. She can be cruel, Your Majesty, and I fear this is just the start. Darnley recoils as the man leans in and whispers. But many of us share your frustration with her. Now she is with child, she has started to overestimate her agency. Darnley darkens. These nobles have only ever shown him contempt before now. Well, perhaps if you'd taken my crown more seriously.
24:32 Matt Forde? We could be persuaded to if certain provisions were made for power, land, religion. Darnley's eyes widen as he realises what the lord is proposing. Oh, a coup? Yes, and to be clear, a coup in Scotland can mean a cow, but this is a different type of Highland coup. Thank you for that. Obviously, we know at the time sectarianism is the major issue here, and Lord Morton is a Protestant, and what he's saying to the Catholic Darnley is, "You go easy on the Protestants, and we'll support you toppling her and becoming king." I have no grounds to depose Mary.
25:11 Matt Forde? Grounds can always be created. Darnley fixes him, uncertain. The man flips the coin, offers a toothy grin. She could be off her throne before these even go into circulation. Darnley feels himself straightened as his father's face fills his head again. He cannot let Mary humiliate him, reduce him, but is he really willing to keep his crown? By stripping Mary of hers.
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27:13 Matt Forde? That night, the Queen's Chamber, Holyrood Palace. Mary watches, stomach churning, as Darnley plunges a dagger into her secretary's limp, blood-soaked body, then stand back and offer a sickening smile to the rebel lords that surround them. So now Mary's watching her husband unexpectedly stab her secretary.
27:38 Alice Levine? And can I ask about the secretary? Who is he?
27:41 Matt Forde? He's an Italian man, good-looking by all accounts. And obviously, what Darnley's trying to do is make out that Mary has been tonking the secretary.
27:51 Alice Levine? And is that completely fictitious?
27:52 Matt Forde? Completely fictitious. What is fact is that, in fact, Darnley had been tonking this secretary.
27:57 Alice Levine? No, plot twist. So actually, although Mary spent lots of time with the secretary, so he was a good fall guy, actually, Darnley's squeezed.
28:07 Matt Forde? That's right.
28:08 Alice Levine? This is juicy as hell.
28:11 Matt Forde? Mary moves her gaze to one of the lords, as he addresses Darnley.
28:16 Matt Forde? You watch her, we'll rally reinforcements, your majesty.
28:20 Matt Forde? Mary trembles, as the rest of the nobles charge from the room, knives raised. Mary squeezes her eyes shut, forcing down panic. She's certain her only chance is escape. She looks back at her husband, who swipes a flagon of whisky from the table and begins to pace anxiously. Mary refuses to believe he's enjoying this, or that such brutality was his idea. Henry, please, this isn't right.
28:51 Matt Forde? Mary watches Darnley halt, and eye her with suspicion. She takes a deep breath. Her heart thuds, as Darnley takes another large swig of whisky. She gazes at him with desperate eyes, reaches a hand out. Please! Mary forces herself to stay put. He raises his hand. She is ready for the blow. But then she feels him pulling her into his arms, clutching her like she's his savior. Moments later, she's horrified, as he pulls at her skirts, wanting more. She forces down the bile rising in her throat, the aroma of whisky on his breath. She must play this carefully.
29:33 Matt Forde? My darling, please, whatever those brutes have promised you, they are not your allies. Mary watches Darnley snap his chin up, defensive.
29:45 Matt Forde? Course they are, they have declared me king again, your king!
29:49 Matt Forde? To get what they wanted, but I fear now they have it, they won't need you. She fixes him with imploring eyes. Do you truly think, they will let a Catholic Englishman, sit on the Scottish throne?
30:06 Matt Forde? She sees a flicker of doubt cross Darnley's face. She places his hand on her abdomen. This child, our child, is the future of Scotland, the heir to England's throne. He empowers us both.
30:22 Matt Forde? She pulls him to her, and she feels Darnley soften, and starts to sob.
30:27 Matt Forde? It...
30:29 Matt Forde? It's too late!
30:32 Matt Forde? Mary grabs his shoulders, tilts his chin up. "No, not if you help me escape, and I swear to you, when I am free, I will pardon you for your part in this. I was wrong to do what I did. I was angry, but I..." Mary hesitates, has to force out the words. "Still love you." She wincers as Darnley grabs her again, holds her tighter than before. Mary allows a fraction of relief, as she feels Darnley pull her towards the door. She watches as he glances down the corridor, but as her eyes travel back to her secretary's blood-soaked corpse, she's reminded of how dangerous her husband has become.
31:17 Matt Forde? Mary promises herself, that if she escapes untouched, Darnley and the rebel lords will never endanger her and her precious heir ever again. And right now, there is only one man in her council she can still trust to help her.
31:39 Matt Forde? Eleven months later, December 1566, Stirling Castle, Scotland. James Hepburn, Earl of Bothwell, strides through the corridor. He feels a swell of satisfaction as he catches his reflection in a polished shield. Bothwell's face is weathered from years of battle, a Scotland's border lieutenant and sheriff of Edinburgh. He admires the fine blue doublet Mary gifted him for helping her restore order.
32:10 Alice Levine? "Okay, so the rebels didn't," asked Mary.
32:12 Matt Forde? "No, so Mary pardoned Darnley, she outlawed the rebels, and she made this man, Bothwell, her number one man."
32:22 Matt Forde? He hopes today's christening will be a more peaceful affair, now that Mary has returned to her rightful place as Queen of Scotland. He straightens the expensive fabric, admiring how it fits his stocky frame.
32:37 Matt Forde? Bothwell opens the Queen's chamber and smiles at the sight of Mary bent over a cradle, cooing at six-month-old Prince James. For a moment, he allows himself to indulge in the fantasy he's had almost daily since becoming her personal bodyguard, that the boy is his child and Mary his devoted queen. A high-pitched trill brings Bothwell back to reality.
33:01 Matt Forde? This is absurd. Why can't I wear a crown to my own son's christening?
33:07 Matt Forde? Bothwell feels disgust curl in his stomach as his gaze moves to Darnley.
33:13 Matt Forde? As the only man on Mary's council who didn't plot against her, Bothwell hates that she pardoned this weasel after his betrayal. But at least, on his advice, she refused to reinstate his king status. You no longer have the right to bear royal arms. I want a crown or I shall not attend. And I want... Bothwell steps forward, his voice cutting off Darnley like a blade. Lord Darnley, you will leave. No. Bothwell watches Darnley's head snap round, his bloodshot eyes burning with fury. You can't order me out. Bothwell holds his gaze until Darnley stumbles back towards the door.
33:57 Matt Forde? Bothwell is struck by how weary Mary looks. Your Majesty, you must reconsider divorcing. But Mary snaps. If I do that, James loses legitimacy. Everything I've been fighting for, his position as heir, his claim to England, will be gone. He'll have nothing to inherit if Darnley continues to alienate every monarch in Europe. You should be with someone more worthy. To Bothwell's frustration, Mary cuts him dead. My hands are tied, Lord Bothwell. Bothwell's heart sinks. He sees her face soften. She shrugs her shoulders. Maybe God will settle the matter for us. My husband's last part of syphilis nearly
34:41 Matt Forde? killed him. Perhaps the next will be more decisive.
34:47 Alice Levine? Can you imagine being like, this marriage isn't working, I don't really know how to move forward, we really don't bring out the best in each other, but he is riddled with syphilis, so hopefully that will just draw things to a natural conclusion.
35:01 Matt Forde? He's a slag, so maybe next time he gets the clap, it'll kill him. Capisce?
35:06 Matt Forde? Bothwell studies Mary as she returns to James. A new possibility sparking to life.
35:13 Matt Forde? Perhaps there is a way to free Mary, safeguard her son, and clear the path for Bothwell, to get everything he wants, after all.
35:25 Matt Forde? Two months later, Kirkersfield, Edinburgh.
35:31 Matt Forde? Darnley slams his goblet down on the table and pulls Mary onto his lap.
35:36 Matt Forde? "My beautiful wife."
35:39 Matt Forde? He squeezes her possessively, ignores her flinching with revulsion at the dried syphilitic pustules that mark his face. Mary sent into this house near Holyrood a month ago to convalesce. Now he's nearly recovered, he wants it made clear that she still fulfills her marital duties. He grimaces at the sight of Bothwell striding into the room.
36:01 Matt Forde? "Your Majesty, you're needed back at Holyrood."
36:05 Matt Forde? Darnley hesitates, then loosens his grip on his wife. His cheeks flush as he watches Bothwell steer Mary out. He turns to the guests, no longer in the mood to socialize.
36:19 Matt Forde? "Everyone, out."
36:21 Matt Forde? Darnley's about to go to bed when two young ladies approach. "We'd like to stay, Your Majesty." Darnley takes in their comely smiles and heaving bosoms. Maybe all is not lost.
36:36 Matt Forde? One hour later, Darnley lies in bed, shirt open, a lady either side of him feeding him grapes. He's startled when his valet bursts in. "My lord, I cannot find the night watchman."
36:50 Matt Forde? "Christ, man! Every second I spend looking at your face is a second I'm not looking at hers."
36:56 Matt Forde? Darnley lets one of the ladies run a finger over his chest, snaps.
37:01 Matt Forde? "Just find him, and do not bother me again."
37:05 Matt Forde? He flicks his wrist to dismiss the man, then smiles at the girls, each of whom are retrieving their discarded hose from the floor. To Darnley's delight, they begin tying his wrists to the bed, before using another stocking as a blindfold. He squirms in anticipation as he hears their giggles, then retreating soft footsteps.
37:28 Matt Forde? But as minutes pass, he begins to feel anxious.
37:34 Matt Forde? Hello? Darnley tries to wriggle free, and is relieved when one stocking loosens enough for him to slide his wrist out. He pulls off his blindfold and walks into his dressing room. Damn wenchies! He picks up a lamp, and steps into the corridor. He's struck by the silence. A chill runs down his spine. Vale?
38:01 Matt Forde? Hello?
38:04 Matt Forde? Who's there? Darnley creeps down the staircase. His eye catches the basement door, ajar. He squints at what looks like soot on the floor. He runs a finger over it and raises it to his nose. His heart stops, as he catches sight of a shadow disappear out of the door. It isn't soot. It's gunpowder.
38:31 Matt Forde? Darnley bolts for the entrance, then out into the garden. The cold February night hits him like a slap. Frost crunches under his bare feet. His lungs burn.
38:51 Matt Forde? The blast throws Darnley face-first into the frozen lawn. His ears ring. His vision blurs. For several seconds, he can't move, can't think. Then slowly, painfully, he lifts his head. Darnley's eyes widen in horror. The house is gone. Flames lick the night sky and smoke billows. Darnley scrambles upright, but as he does, he's grabbed from behind. Strong hands lock around his throat. He claws at the finger squeezing his windpipe. He feels the pinch of nails are burning in his lungs, before consciousness starts to slip away, and everything goes black.
39:37 Alice Levine? Whoa, I did not see this coming.
39:40 Matt Forde? Yeah, I mean, fair play to him. He survived a weird sex game, his house exploding, but then he got strangled.
39:45 Alice Levine? And it was Bothwell, right?
39:47 Matt Forde? Well, if it wasn't, he's got a very good instinct for when Mary might need to get out of something.
39:53 Matt Forde? Moments later, Holyrood Palace. Mary bolts upright in bed, heart hammering. She rushes over to the window. In the distance, an orange glow lights the night sky. The door bursts open, and her advisers rush in, still pulling on their robes.
40:13 Matt Forde? Your Majesty, we think there's been an explosion at Kirkfield Field.
40:18 Matt Forde? Mary feels cold, sharp panic. My husband? We... we don't know. Mary's thoughts spin. Insurrection. Then, her son.
40:34 Matt Forde? She sprints to the nursery. She rounds the door and collapses with relief at the sight of James sleeping peacefully in his nurse's arms. She quickly recovers herself, anger overtaking. Ugh, Protestant scum. Her spine stiffens. Assemble my council immediately.
40:56 Matt Forde? Half an hour later, Mary is dressed, baby James swaddled against her chest. She's about to head to her council chamber when Mary stops dead as the Provost of Edinburgh rushes towards her.
41:11 Matt Forde? Your Majesty, I'm sorry to tell you, your husband has been found at Kirkfield Field.
41:18 Matt Forde? Mary feels an icy shiver. Her eyes search his face.
41:24 Matt Forde? And?
41:26 Matt Forde? He is dead, Your Majesty.
41:29 Matt Forde? Mary collapses onto a chair, but as she does, she notices the Provost linger. What is it? Is there something more?
41:39 Matt Forde? He...
41:41 Matt Forde? He wasn't killed by the explosion, Your Majesty.
41:45 Matt Forde? Mary blinks, confused. She stays on him, noting his growing discomfort.
41:51 Matt Forde? His body was found in the garden. He showed no signs of being near the blast. He was strangled. The perpetrator must have realised they missed their mark and tried again.
42:01 Alice Levine? What was confusing was he was wearing stockings and an elaborate masquerade mask.
42:07 Matt Forde? Mary clutches James tighter.
42:10 Matt Forde? That... it's impossible.
42:13 Matt Forde? Mary's mind races. She catches a glimpse of herself in the mirror, eyes wild, clutching her child, alone.
42:22 Matt Forde? A knife was also found by the body.
42:24 Matt Forde? A knife? Mary inhales sharply as the provost presents a blade. She takes in its gold-inlaid steel, its wire-wrapped handle, until her eyes narrow as they come to rest on the coat of arms imprinted on the hilt. Two lions pulling at a rose. Her hands tighten around her son. Because Mary knows that coat of arms, and she knows the provost does too.
42:51 Matt Forde? Your Majesty, I must remind you that this amounts to hate reason. The person must be punished by the full force of the law.
42:59 Matt Forde? She takes the dagger. She runs her finger up the cold blade. He is the one man she trusted. But Mary must protect her country, her crown, her heir. So she tells the provost. Find him and bring him to me. Now. Because it's time she spoke with Lord Bothwell.
43:31 Speaker 07 Ghosts aren't real. At least, that's what journalist Tristan Redmond always believed. Sure, odd things happen in his childhood bedroom, but ultimately, he shrugged them off. Until he discovered that he wasn't alone, that everyone who lived thereafter him also had bizarre experiences they couldn't explain. And it gets even weirder. It just so happens that his wife's great-grandmother was murdered in the house next door. Is this ghost somehow connected to her murder? He decides to go where no son-in-law should, digging up a cold case and asking questions that nobody wants answered. Like, could his wife's great-grandfather have gotten away with the perfect crime? This is a podcast about family secrets, overwhelming coincidence, and the things that come back to haunt us.
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45:37 Matt Forde? One hour later. The receiving room, Holyrood Palace. Mary stands by the fireplace, clutching her son, James.
45:49 Matt Forde? Her head jerks at the sound of Bothwell's heavy boots approaching. He heads straight for her, relief etched on his face. Your Majesty, I thank God you were here. Mary forces herself to stay calm.
46:06 Matt Forde? Where have you been? Kirkfield, Your Majesty. It was my duty as sheriff to survey the scene. I am very sorry to report that Lord Downley was killed.
46:19 Alice Levine? By somebody we don't know, definitely not me.
46:24 Matt Forde? Mary eyes Bothwell's immaculate jacket and polished shoes. She bows her head and nods. You have come straight from the wreckage? Yes, Your Majesty. And his body was identifiable? Bothwell nods. Mary forces herself to go on. It's just, I would have thought such an explosion would make finding his remains near impossible. Mary sees his jaw tense. Your Majesty, why would you question what I tell you? Mary swallows hard. The provost was here before you. He told a different story.
47:09 Matt Forde? Mary studies Bothwell's face, his eyes cloud in confusion. What story? They say the explosion did not kill my husband, that your dagger was found beside his body. They say you...
47:28 Matt Forde? They say...
47:30 Matt Forde? Mary's words trail off, as Bothwell stares at her, incredulous. Mary watches Bothwell's face redden, considers calling for her guards.
47:41 Matt Forde? But when he speaks again, his voice is tinged with pain rather than fury. Your Majesty, I admit there were times when I wished your husband dead, but... Mary stays on him. His tone drops to a whisper. My devotion to you, my religious beliefs, would never permit me to do such a thing. I have been loyal, always. Mary feels her resolve waver. But they say that... Mary stays on Bothwell, as he starts pacing. His voice becomes steadier. That I am to blame. Your Majesty, with me imprisoned and Lord Downley dead,
48:26 Matt Forde? who benefits but the rebels? It leaves the path clear for them to seize you and James. The Provost is lying? She studies Bothwell. He has always been her true ally. Her mind races. We must seek refuge at Sterling. You, me, and James. I have a better idea. We send James there, but you and I stand here, united. Mary studies him, confused. Why would... And we marry. Mary eyeballs Bothwell, certain she's misheard. You would have a husband who commands armies, who knows how to fight.
49:09 Matt Forde? It sends a clear message to the rebels that you cannot be touched. Mary feels her pulse calm, as Bothwell gently places his hands on her shoulders. I have always been your loyal servant. Let me be a loyal husband, protect you and your heir. The room seems to swirl around her, Bothwell's face blurring in and out.
49:34 Alice Levine? Okay, well, this is all moving quite fast. Um, but I'll think about it. What about you two? How did you two get engaged?
49:40 Matt Forde? Well, long story.
49:42 Alice Levine? You're gonna laugh. I thought he'd murdered my... No, you tell it. You're better at it.
49:48 Matt Forde? Yeah, you tell the coat of arms, Becs, the dagger. Show him it.
49:52 Alice Levine? In cold blood, yeah. Oh, God. And I said, "You've killed him." And he said, "I can't believe you would doubt me because of my religious beliefs." And then he said, "Send your baby to a castle. We'll get married." And I just was potty in his hand.
50:05 Matt Forde? Yeah, which is ironic because my husband had been. He'd been throttled. Um, yeah, it's funny how life works out.
50:11 Alice Levine? It's been fifteen years.
50:13 Matt Forde? She thinks of how his devotion has never wavered, how he has always made her feel safe.
50:21 Matt Forde? She looks down into James's delicate face. She must do everything she can to protect him.
50:28 Matt Forde? And so she finds herself whispering,
50:32 Matt Forde? "Yes, I'll do it. I'll marry you."
50:40 Matt Forde? Three months later, May 1567, Bothwell Castle, Scotland. Mary stares through the window at the crowd gathered beyond the castle gates. Her stomach drops as she reads their placards bearing the words, "Only harlots marry in May" and "Whore Queen." Rumours of Bothwell's involvement in Darnley's murder have somehow spread across the country. And Mary's hasty marriage to him has only helped fan the flames. Every day, the Protestant rebels grow in number and defiance.
51:16 Matt Forde? She looks across at Bothwell now as he strides in, flanked by two soldiers.
51:22 Matt Forde? I've been informed the rebel lords have taken Edinburgh Castle and are coming here with a thousand-strong army.
51:29 Matt Forde? Mary feels her chest tighten. It's not just her subjects who object to her marriage. Her council has turned on her too. Now their threats to unseat her have turned to action. They may send an army to Stirling. We must go to get James and... No! Mary blinks at him, stunned by his forceful tone. What? The only heirs of consequence now are the ones you bear me. We stay here while I raise an army twice their size. We make no concessions. Mary feels her temper flare. We? You may be my husband, but I am still queen, and I order you to-
52:12 Matt Forde? She recoils as Bothwell presses his large frame against her so hard she's forced against the oak-paneled wall. Her heart hammers against her ribs as his voice drops. Be careful, Mary. You would do well to treat me as more of a king than your last husband. If you do not wish to meet the same fate.
52:37 Alice Levine? Okay, hot take: Mary, Queen of Scots, terrible taste in man. Another wrong'un.
52:42 Matt Forde? Yeah, but they're fit wronguns, aren't they? So fit. They're long men with... Big things. Mary's mouth goes bone-dry as she fixes Bothwell. His eyes, once kind, are now cold, threatening.
52:59 Matt Forde? She attempts a steady tone. What do you know of Lord Darnley's fate? Mary's body trembles as Bothwell's lips turn into a knowing smile. The room seems to tilt as she realises how naive she's been. How wrong about this man. I will have you arrested. I will tell them. You will accuse me of nothing unless you also wish to incriminate yourself. I have always acted on your specific orders, after all. Mary stiffens as the full horror hits home. She's not only married her late husband's murderer, but by doing so, she's made herself his accomplice.
53:41 Matt Forde? From now on, you give no orders. You will follow me. Mary leans against the cold wall as Bothwell strides away. Rage and fear course through her body as she watches her husband disappear. She'd rather be dead than serve at this man's feet.
54:02 Alice Levine? I hate to say it, but that doesn't feel like a completely unlikely situation.
54:06 Matt Forde? Yeah, careful what you wish for. I'd rather be dead. We can sort it. Mary's hand instinctively reaches towards her neck, where the diamond ring her cousin Elizabeth once gifted her hangs from a thick gold chain. Despite the bad blood between them, Mary's kept it close to serve as a reminder of all that would be hers one day. And as she thumbs the ring, an idea starts to form.
54:36 Matt Forde? Two hours later, in her private chamber, Mary watches the last of her auburn curls fall to the floor. It is done, Your Majesty. Mary's hand trembles as she raises her hand mirror, gasps at her own reflection. Where there were once thick locks of hair, there are now barely enough wisps to cover her pale scalp. One of her ladies enters, holding a man's riding doublet and breeches, as chants from outside the castle walls grow louder.
55:05 Matt Forde? Kill the Horde Queen! Kill the Horde Queen!
55:13 Matt Forde? Minutes later, in the moonlight of the grounds, Mary creeps out of the castle gates, dressed in men's clothes. She pulls herself atop a horse. Adrenaline courses through her veins as she squeezes her knees into the beast's flanks, urging him forward. She feels the wind rush against her scalp. Against her chest, Elizabeth's diamond hangs from its thick gold chain.
55:39 Matt Forde? Mary fixes her eyes on the distant walls as she gallops under the portcullis and out into the darkness. Because if she can escape across the border, she will ride south to England and plead with her cousin Elizabeth. Win her round, get her help, and raise an army to avenge and destroy every man that has ever wronged her in Scotland. Starting with Lord Bothwell.
56:15 Matt Forde? From Audible and Samistat Audio, this is the second episode in our series, The Warring Queens.
56:21 Alice Levine? A quick note about our dialogue: in most cases, we can't know exactly what was said, but all our dramatizations are based on historical research.
56:28 Matt Forde? If you'd like to know more about the story, you can read The True Life of Mary Stuart by John Guy, Rival Queens by Kate Williams, or listen to The Rest Is History: Mary, Queen of Scots, and Elizabeth I.
56:42 Alice Levine? And if you'd like to get in touch with us, you can email us at [email protected] , and we love hearing from you.
56:48 Matt Forde? British Scandal is hosted by me, Matt Ford.
56:51 Alice Levine? And me, Alice Levine.
56:53 Matt Forde? Written by Wendy Grandita. Additional writing by Alice Levine and Matt Ford.
56:57 Alice Levine? Our story editor was James Maniac. Sound design by Rich Evans. Our engineer was Jai Williams. For Samistat, our series producer was Chica Ayers. Our assistant producer was Louise Mason. Our senior producers were Joe Sykes and Dasha Lisitzina. Executive producers for Audible were Theodora Leludis and Estelle Doyle.
57:26 Speaker 09 On January 24, 2023, in Ducksbury, Massachusetts, Patrick Clancy called 911. He had found his wife Lindsay badly injured and his three children dead and dying. What followed would become one of the most searing and complicated cases in recent memory, raising hard questions about motherhood, mental illness, and how far our justice system will go to understand what really happened. I'm Candace DeLong, host of the podcast Killer Psyche. In our latest episode, we take you inside the case of Lindsay Clancy, the postpartum psychosis defense, the courtroom battle, and the trial that just ended in a stunning mistrial. Follow
58:10 Speaker 09 Killer Psyche wherever you get your podcasts. Audible subscribers can listen to all episodes of Killer Psyche one week early and ad-free right now. Join Audible in the Audible app or by subscribing on Apple Podcasts.
58:26 Speaker 10 For decades, two legendary brands fought for the hearts of American bikers, Indian Motorcycle and Harley-Davidson. The battle looked a lot like Coke versus Pepsi or Ford versus Chevy, but tastes changed and Indian didn't adapt fast enough. The icon all but died. Then came the con men, the dreamers, a string of spectacular failures that kept Indian in the grave, until one company finally got it right. This is the story of an improbable revival and the reignition of an old rivalry. Hey, I'm David Brown, the host of the podcast Business Wars. And every season, we bring you the true stories behind the companies that shape our world. Indian's new owners are going all in, but an existential crisis looms. Can Indian and Harley recruit enough younger riders to survive?
59:09 Speaker 10 Make sure to follow Business Wars wherever you get your podcasts. Audible subscribers can binge all episodes of Business Wars early and ad-free right now. Join Audible in the Audible app or by subscribing on Apple Podcasts.
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