Armchair Anonymous: Summer Fling

Dax and Monica talk to Armcherries! In today's episode, Armcherries tell us about a summer fling. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Dax Shepard?

  Welcome, welcome, welcome to Armchair Anonymous. Today, we're gonna hear juicy stories of summer flings.

• 0:08Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 0:10Dax Shepard?

  One of these was so precious.

• 0:14Speaker 01

  Yeah. Wow, Dax really loses it. He loses his entire... What do we call that? Like tier reserve? Water reserve?

• 0:23Dax Shepard?

  Sure, sure.

• 0:24Speaker 01

  It was really sweet.

• 0:25Dax Shepard?

  Lightly dehydrated. One was so sweet. They're very fun and sweet. And yeah, they're all wonderful. They're so fun.

• 0:32Speaker 01

  Oh, very uplifting.

• 0:33Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, makes you nostalgic for a summer fling. We also have new prompts. Please call us. Oh, I was gonna throw this out there, too. If you know somebody with an incredible story that might not even listen to the show, but they like telling stories and you can think of it, wrangle them in to submit, too.

• 0:50Speaker 01

  Pass this along.

• 0:51Dax Shepard?

  Pass it along. So, new prompts. Tell us a crazy dinner party story. Nurses, tell us your craziest nurse stories. Tell us a crazy study abroad story. Tell us about a time you made the news. Dinner party, nurse stories, study abroad, and making the news. Please enjoy Summer Fling. We get support from Quince.

• 1:14Speaker 01

  I have to say, I am so ready for fall. I want sweaters. I've been craving a true crisp morning where I actually need a jacket. I can't wait.

• 1:23Dax Shepard?

  I'm fully there. The second it dips below 70, I'm like, this is my season. Give me the layers, give me the boots, give me a reason to wear something other than a t-shirt. And honestly, that's why I love Quince, because fall is when your wardrobe actually has to show up. And everything at Quince is 50 to 80% less than similar brands. We're talking 100% Mongolian cashmere sweaters, starting at $60.

• 1:46Speaker 01

  $60? $60 for cashmere that you'd expect from a luxury brand without the luxury price tag? It's amazing. Gets me every time. It really shouldn't be real, but it is, because they go straight to the factories, they skip the middlemen, and they just hand you the savings. The stuff isn't trendy. It's the kind of pieces you grab over and over because they work every time.

• 2:03Dax Shepard?

  The 100% Mongolian cashmere sweaters for me are it. When I look at Steve McQueen, this man owned a couple of sweaters he wore all the time, and he looks iconic.

• 2:12Speaker 01

  It's a uniform.

• 2:14Dax Shepard?

  Mm-hmm.

• 2:14Speaker 01

  And Quince isn't just about the clothes. They have hotel-quality bedding, cookware, bath essentials, thoughtfully-designed furniture. You can really go there and outfit your entire apartment or house. So if you're in need of any kind of fall refresh at home, too, same quality, same attention to detail for every corner of your life.

• 2:32Dax Shepard?

  Find your next fall favorites at Quince. Download the Quince app for app-exclusive offers or go to quince.com. Get free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada and the UK, too. And when Quince asks where you heard about them, let them know it was Armchair Expert. It's the best way to support the show. This episode is presented by YouTube Premium. YouTube was already great, but Premium supercharges it. If you like YouTube, you'll love Premium. Try YouTube Premium for two months free at youtube.com/premium. Trial eligibility varies. Terms apply. Cancel anytime. Now let's get into today's episode.

• 3:32Speaker 02

  Hi, guys.

• 3:33Dax Shepard?

  Hi. What fake name shall we use?

• 3:36Speaker 02

  Can you please pick?

• 3:38Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, let me stare at your face for a minute.

• 3:40Speaker 01

  I have one, but I want to hear yours.

• 3:42Dax Shepard?

  Okay. Well, first of all, you have a very inviting face.

• 3:44Speaker 02

  Well, thank you.

• 3:45Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, yeah. It's very pleasing. It's very symmetrical. The golden rule's poppin'.

• 3:49Speaker 01

  God, we love that.

• 3:50Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, we can only look with envy at the golden rule. Well, I don't know, Moni, you're not not symmetrical. I'm very asymmetrical. Different-shaped nostril. No, my nose is fucking bent. I got different-shaped nostrils.

• 4:02Speaker 02

  I got a septoplasty this year because I had a crooked nose, so that helps. But now my nostrils are really crooked.

• 4:07Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, mine are terrible. So what's a septoplasty?

• 4:10Speaker 02

  Corrected deviated septum.

• 4:11Dax Shepard?

  From Cocaine News?

• 4:13Speaker 02

  Yeah, all of that. But my E T surgeon did me a favor and filled in a divot, so shout out to him.

• 4:19Speaker 01

  Yeah, because you know, deviated septum surgery is like, sometimes in quotes. It's like, just to get a nose job.

• 4:25Dax Shepard?

  Well, no, we both said, Monica and I were on Hot Ones, and we were claiming that the hot burnt our nose so bad that we had to get it repaired. And then they gave us this stupid nose job.

• 4:35Speaker 01

  How dare they?

• 4:37Dax Shepard?

  Now I have this stupid cute button nose.

• 4:42Dax Shepard?

  Okay, I haven't gotten closer. I want to hear yours. Can I hear you? Boom, and I think we know why.

• 4:47Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 4:47Dax Shepard?

  Robin Wright Penn.

• 4:48Speaker 01

  That's right.

• 4:48Speaker 02

  Oh, okay.

• 4:49Dax Shepard?

  I don't know. Does she still go by Penn?

• 4:51Speaker 01

  Ooh, probably not.

• 4:52Dax Shepard?

  Okay, Robin Wright. Okay, so, Robin, where are you?

• 4:55Speaker 02

  I am in Denver, Colorado.

• 4:56Dax Shepard?

  Ding ding ding, Rob was just telling me one second ago that he went to Red Rock this summer with his little boy for the first time.

• 5:03Speaker 02

  Oh, who'd you see?

• 5:04Speaker 03

  The Head and the Heart.

• 5:05Speaker 02

  Ooh. Oh, that's a good show at Red Rocks.

• 5:07Dax Shepard?

  Do you go?

• 5:07Speaker 02

  I haven't been this summer, but yeah, I used to see Brandy Carlisle every single summer there, the weekend after Labor Day, Avet Brothers.

• 5:14Speaker 01

  Oh, my God, all our friends.

• 5:16Dax Shepard?

  Oh, hey, I almost said so avious. I meant to say envious.

• 5:19Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's fun.

• 5:20Speaker 01

  Oh, amazing.

• 5:21Dax Shepard?

  Okay, so you have a summer fling story.

• 5:24Speaker 02

  Okay, so it's 2007, and I have just graduated from college. And I am taking my father to Peru. He's a teacher, and so he got his summers off, and so we're gonna go to Peru. I take myself backpacking Europe 2003 when I graduated high school. So this time, I want to bring my dad.

• 5:40Dax Shepard?

  Hold on, pause. What a lucky dad. If one of my little girls asks me to go to Peru when they graduate college, I'm gonna fucking explode.

• 5:47Speaker 02

  I'm glad you said that, because when I was thinking about this story, I was like, why didn't I bring girlfriends? Was I that lame? But he's such a special man.

• 5:53Speaker 01

  Oh, that's lovely.

• 5:55Speaker 02

  But just wait till you hear it. He cannot hear this story. I hope he never hears this story. Background is I graduated from a conservative Christian college outside of Chicago. I bet Rob could name it, just in the Western burbs. This is a college that is steeped in purity culture. And I was raised in purity culture, and sex and dating is not anything my father and I talk about. I go to Peru a week earlier than my dad, because he's finishing up his school year. I've got some time. I'm not gonna waste any time. I get down there. I visit a friend in Lima, I do some dune bugging in Waikachina where the sand dunes are, and then I end up in Huaraz, which is a town in the Cordillera Blanca. And it's there that I meet Neil. We'll call him Neil.

• 6:32Dax Shepard?

  Okay.

• 6:32Speaker 02

  This man from Scotland who was also traveling solo. And a lot of people are traveling in groups, so we sort of find each other, because we're the only solo travelers, and just hit it off. And we start doing day trips together. And it's not romantic. It's just comfortable, and we have a lot to talk about. And then when it's time for my dad to come to Peru, Neil just sort of joins the trip. My dad rolls with that. Also, for the record, I'm like a recovered purity culture person.

• 6:58Dax Shepard?

  Already at that point, or this started the recovery?

• 7:00Speaker 02

  I was a closeted sexual being at that point.

• 7:03Dax Shepard?

  Oh, good for you.

• 7:04Speaker 02

  So our first trip with my dad is going down into the Colca Canyon and camping. And it's during that time that I notice my sleeping bag is sort of shimmying towards Neil's, and I don't mind, and it's just really comfortable and a great way to spend a cold night. And I am aware of the fact that it's like sort of weird that my father's just on the other side and probably clueless.

• 7:22Dax Shepard?

  In the same tent?

• 7:23Speaker 02

  In the same tent, yes.

• 7:24Dax Shepard?

  Okay, great.

• 7:25Speaker 01

  But that adds a little danger.

• 7:26Speaker 02

  Everything's really chaste and innocent, though, and then we proceed. We make our way back up the Colca Canyon, and then we end up in Arequipa, which is one of the towns there. So then we eat their delicacy there in Peru, which is cui, which is guinea pig.

• 7:39Dax Shepard?

  Is it delish?

• 7:40Speaker 02

  No, too bony.

• 7:41Speaker 01

  Ooh, bony.

• 7:42Dax Shepard?

  Too much work, yeah.

• 7:43Speaker 02

  Yeah. And my dad, every night, he's going to bed early. So that night, my dad goes to bed. We're always sharing a hostel room. So at this hostel, Neil and I go upstairs, and we're just on the hostel roof, enjoying the city's skylight, and I get a kiss on the forehead. So I was like, oh, okay. I didn't mind that. We're out of the friend zone, of course, right after my father arrives. But again, still really innocent, cute, harmless. I didn't date in college. It was mostly drunken one-night stands. I was also a closeted alcoholic, but didn't realize that at the time.

• 8:12Dax Shepard?

  Oh, wonderful.

• 8:13Speaker 01

  A lot of times, I think those go together.

• 8:16Speaker 02

  For sure. I'm now a friend of Bill's and eight years.

• 8:18Dax Shepard?

  Oh, congratulations.

• 8:20Speaker 02

  Thanks. The next day, our next adventure is to go to Copacabana in Bolivia on Lake Titicaca. My dad, however, says he wants to take the later bus-train thing. He's gonna arrive half a day later, because he wants to buy a nativity set for my mom.

• 8:33Dax Shepard?

  Oh.

• 8:34Speaker 02

  So he says, go ahead. So Neil and I are on our own to go to Bolivia. So we take trains and buses, and we're snuggling, and it's so cute, and it's so wholesome. When we get to Copacabana, the thing to do there is you get a rowboat or a paddleboat, and you go out on Lake Titicaca, and you just enjoy the surrounding area. We grab a bottle of wine, though. I go out in the boat. We get tipsy. Finally, someone says something that's like, why haven't you kissed me yet? Or something, something, and then it's on.

• 9:02Dax Shepard?

  In a boat?

• 9:03Speaker 02

  In a boat, in the middle of the day, on Lake Titicaca.

• 9:05Dax Shepard?

  Ooh.

• 9:06Speaker 02

  And then we realize, well, there's only so much you can do on a boat. So we decide to head back to shore, go to the hostel that we have dropped our stuff at, that my father's meeting us at later, and we make excellent use of it and waste no time. And I don't know, I think I set a record that day. Now that I'm in my 40s, I look back at that longingly.

• 9:25Dax Shepard?

  As far as many of times coitus?

• 9:27Speaker 02

  Many times, yes. So many times coitus.

• 9:29Dax Shepard?

  Well, the clock's ticking. Dad's in, right?

• 9:31Speaker 02

  Dad's coming. Sometime later, we meet up with him, and we go out and about. I think we're looking for dinner, and he leans over to me, and he's like, Robin, did you guys smoke marijuana in there? It smells real funky.

• 9:41Dax Shepard?

  Oh, my God, your father asked this? Did you smoke marijuana?

• 9:46Speaker 02

  He was always really concerned about me and using substances. I was like, no, I'll have to go smell it when we get back. I didn't notice anything. Also, my dad doesn't know what marijuana smells like. So then we go to dinner. My dad, again, turns in early. Neil and I have a drink. We realize soon after we don't want to be drinking. So we do what any classy young backpackers do, and we go find some sort of hourly motel. I don't really know what we found or what he found. I know we woke some innkeeper up in the middle of the night. And again, we make excellent use of this room. Then we go back. We creep into the hostel that I'm sharing with my dad. He doesn't even wake up. The next day, we part ways. Neil has his other adventures through South America. My father and I are going on to the jungle, and then we're gonna go hike the Inca Trail to Machu Picchu.

• 10:28Speaker 02

  So we make it to the jungle. It's called Akitos, and you can only get there by boat or plane. It's really out there. It's really cool. A couple of days in, I start to feel unwell.

• 10:36Speaker 01

  Uh oh.

• 10:37Speaker 02

  And I've got fevers, aches, chills. My dad looks at his guidebook and he's like, dengue fever. You have dengue fever. So we go to a clinic. They give me fluids. So like, there's not much we can do for you. There's no tests at this point. Just manage your symptoms. Tylenol Advil. I'm 22. I rally. The symptoms are intermittent. After Akitos, we go onto Cusco, which is where you're gonna start the Inca Trail. And it's there that I realize I really have to pee a lot, but I can't pee.

• 11:03Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 11:03Dax Shepard?

  UTI time. Yeah.

• 11:06Speaker 02

  I'm like, oh, this is a UTI. I don't know to use the bathroom in between things. So I do what any sensible 22-year-old does before I go on a three-day trek through the Andes, and I do nothing.

• 11:16Speaker 01

  Oh, no.

• 11:17Speaker 02

  So it's like a three-day trip. I feel fine most of the time. I'm impressed with myself. And then the last night there, I start to feel pretty ill. And I know I'm ill because everyone's drinking and partying before you do the sunset hike to see Machu Picchu. And I'm more pissed that I can't drink than the fact that I might be sick and have to crawl into the sleeping bag. And then the next morning, I rally again. I feel great. We're gonna go see Machu Picchu. We do the sunset hike. Then we hike down into it, walk around. I'm feeling really tired, though, and that's just kind of annoying. Then, once you're done there, you take a train from the site down back into Cusco. And again, there's more celebrating and drinking and partying, and I cannot. All I can do is like crawl up on my dad.

• 11:58Speaker 02

  I've got intermittent fevers, my algas, that's like aches and pains. And then we get to Cusco. I feel okay, probably just crawl into bed and go to bed. Next day, we have a really early morning flight. So I'm huddled under this blanket at the airport before our flight. It's really early in the morning. And now I'm just like, okay, I'm just exhausted. That was a bigger hike than I realized. Oof. And then we get on the flight. It's a short flight from Cusco to Lima. As soon as we take off and are in the air, I start shaking uncontrollably, like teeth chattering. I feel really cold, but I'm super hot. They call for a doctor on board because my dad flags over a flight attendant. In my memory, he looks like Gabriel Garcia Marquez, and he hands me a small pill, and I'm sure it's just Tylenol.

• 12:41Speaker 02

  They talk about maybe turning the plane around to go back to Cusco, but because it's a short flight, they're gonna go on to Lima. When we get to Lima, we land, and there's an ambulance waiting for me on the tarmac.

• 12:51Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 12:52Speaker 02

  And they take me to the hospital, run some tests, give me some fluids. I'm medical now, so I'm sure they gave me some antibiotics prophylactically. And then they come back and they say, you have a massive kidney infection.

• 13:04Speaker 01

  Yes, spread to the kidneys.

• 13:06Speaker 02

  I don't say a word because I am pretty sure at this point, but we roll with the dengue fever. We roll with maybe the weird food I ate. So that was the exciting part of the ambulance and basically the end of the story, except that when we go back home to Minnesota, my parents take me to an infectious disease doctor because they have got to figure out why their 22-year-old, otherwise healthy, daughter acquired a massive kidney infection. And I did not ever, throughout that whole thing, have the heart to tell them. It was like, because I was fucking the brains out of this guy.

• 13:33Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 13:34Dax Shepard?

  Neil, the Scotsman.

• 13:35Speaker 01

  The best reason, the only good reason.

• 13:37Dax Shepard?

  Would I be wrong to assume, like, if you're doing a ton of hiking and you're at hostels and showering's not regular and washing your clothes? I mean, you could get a UTI without the sex part, right?

• 13:49Speaker 02

  Hundred percent.

• 13:50Dax Shepard?

  I might have floated that, like, man, I guess we, you know, should have washed our clothes more. I don't know. I would have dumped it on that.

• 13:56Speaker 01

  Totally. I mean, I've had many a UTI.

• 13:59Dax Shepard?

  Don't brag.

• 14:00Speaker 01

  I know. I'm sorry. I try to keep that to myself. This is a big brag. And it's not from wiping.

• 14:06Dax Shepard?

  Okay, I didn't say that.

• 14:08Speaker 01

  You said it with your eyes.

• 14:09Dax Shepard?

  No, I didn't say anything.

• 14:10Speaker 01

  I'm kidding, I'm kidding.

• 14:10Dax Shepard?

  You heard me just now.

• 14:11Speaker 01

  I meant more to the people who think it's from wiping. I wipe always, front to back.

• 14:17Dax Shepard?

  Sure, as you should, as you should.

• 14:19Speaker 01

  Anyway, also, once you start getting UTIs, you are prone to UTIs, and then you can get them so easily. So yes, you could have been like, guess I got a UTI.

• 14:29Dax Shepard?

  Yeah.

• 14:30Speaker 01

  I wiped once, back to fun.

• 14:31Dax Shepard?

  The Christian way, through hard work and exercise.

• 14:34Speaker 02

  I didn't even want to go there.

• 14:35Speaker 01

  Yeah, that's fair.

• 14:37Dax Shepard?

  Oh, wow. Did you stay in touch with Neil?

• 14:39Speaker 02

  I think I emailed him the story and he wrote back lol.

• 14:42Dax Shepard?

  Oh, hmm. I would want more.

• 14:44Speaker 02

  I mean, I'm sure it was lol, but no, we didn't stay in touch. It was a true summer fling. There was just nowhere else to go with that.

• 14:49Dax Shepard?

  Okay, Robin, that was delightful.

• 14:52Speaker 02

  Thank you so much. It's such a treat to be sitting here with you guys.

• 14:55Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, and his dad still with us?

• 14:56Speaker 02

  Dad is still with us, yeah. But we keep him in his innocence. So he's more innocent than ignorant, and he's a good man. He now teaches yoga and has broadened his perspective, so understands that people do things differently than just one way.

• 15:10Speaker 01

  I love that.

• 15:11Dax Shepard?

  Lovely.

• 15:12Speaker 02

  Can I do two quick shout-outs? Okay, my daughters love you. They can't be here, and I'll use their code names as well, but Sissy and Momo. And then I want to give a shout-out to my partner who celebrates 19 years of sobriety today.

• 15:24Speaker 01

  Oh, dude, wonderful.

• 15:27Speaker 02

  That's a shout-out to Hot Rob.

• 15:28Dax Shepard?

  Okay, Hot Rob, not Hot Rod.

• 15:32Speaker 01

  Hot Rob and Robin.

• 15:33Speaker 02

  I know. That's why when you said that, I was like, hmm.

• 15:35Speaker 01

  Oh, my sip. Oh, my sip.

• 15:38Dax Shepard?

  All right, lovely meeting you.

• 15:39Speaker 02

  So nice to meet you, too. Thanks, guys.

• 15:41Dax Shepard?

  Take care.

• 15:43Speaker 01

  Hi.

• 15:44Dax Shepard?

  Hello. Is it nighttime?

• 15:45Speaker 04

  Hi, yeah, it is, sort of. I had to make a fort because I didn't have a cockpit.

• 15:51Dax Shepard?

  Okay, and your name's Hannah, right?

• 15:53Speaker 04

  Yes, it is. It's so nice to meet you guys. Thank you so much for having me.

• 15:57Dax Shepard?

  Where are you, Hannah?

• 15:58Speaker 04

  Right now, I'm in Berlin for the summer in Germany.

• 16:02Speaker 01

  Amazing.

• 16:03Dax Shepard?

  Is it as good as everyone always says?

• 16:04Speaker 04

  Oh, my gosh, better, I think. Yeah.

• 16:07Dax Shepard?

  Really?

• 16:08Speaker 04

  Indescribable, yes. This is like my third time coming back in the past two years. Part of the story takes place here.

• 16:16Speaker 01

  Oh, ding ding ding.

• 16:17Dax Shepard?

  And do you hop over to Prague at all? Because that's quite close.

• 16:20Speaker 04

  Yes, I have been one time. I found it to be so storybook-y, you know? It felt like just walking through history. I found there Copenhagen and Amsterdam to kind of have that feeling. Nothing like the US can provide since it's such a younger country.

• 16:36Speaker 01

  That's true.

• 16:37Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, we were looking at a church in Prague, and I said to the girls, that church is 700 years old. That's three times the age of our country.

• 16:44Speaker 01

  That's wild.

• 16:45Dax Shepard?

  Look, how could that be? Look at it. Okay, so you have a summer fling story?

• 16:50Speaker 04

  Yes, I do. So the summer fling story took place last summer when I was traveling Europe with my best friend after graduating college.

• 16:57Dax Shepard?

  Oh, what a time, what a time.

• 16:59Speaker 04

  Yes, it was coming up on the end in late August, and we were going to end where we started in Paris for a few days after spending a month in Berlin. So it was a three-month-long trip, as long as you can spend with the Schengen visa or without having to get a visa. So the last month of the trip was in Berlin. We had been using the Euro Rail Pass to go all around.

• 17:20Speaker 01

  Oh, incredible.

• 17:21Dax Shepard?

  Jealous.

• 17:22Speaker 04

  Yeah, but we were flying back out of Paris. And for some backstory, while I had been in Berlin in early July, my long-distance partner from college and I had just broken up over the phone. It was a bad, messy situation ship, just like on and off seeing each other for a year. Found myself, single and horny, and available for the first time into the sexiest cities in the world.

• 17:44Speaker 01

  Oh, wow.

• 17:44Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, let's go.

• 17:45Speaker 01

  Good timing.

• 17:46Speaker 04

  Great way to spend the last month of my travels. So after putting a pin in Berlin, my best friend and I were on the train to Paris for the weekend to cap our almost three-month trip. I had been using Hinge since my ex and I broke up in order to meet as many young and hot people as possible.

• 18:03Dax Shepard?

  Okay.

• 18:04Speaker 04

  And so on the train, I was a little bored, so I went to switch my location from Berlin to Paris. And I noticed that someone I had matched with was physically in Berlin but lived in Paris. And I thought this man, I want to call him Jack, was a dime.

• 18:19Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 18:20Speaker 04

  So we weren't gonna be in the same place. I started to chat with him anyway, and we really hit it off. There was witty banter, spicy and exciting back and forth. It was a very entertaining train ride. And it turned out we were just missing each other both ways, unfortunately, like trains passing in the night. He was going to be arriving in Berlin for a festival that weekend, the day I left, and was returning to France the day that I was supposed to fly back to the States. But luckily, I had had a gut feeling a while back that I should maybe invest in a flexible plane ticket home. I like to think it was because I'm truly connected to my French boyfriend and not because me and my best friend had missed our flight out of JFK in June.

• 19:10Dax Shepard?

  We get support from our presenting sponsor YouTube Premium. Now, you already know I'm a big YouTube person. It's incredible on its own, but Premium makes the whole experience feel enhanced. Like you don't realize how much better it can get until you try it. The biggest game changer for me, background play. I love long, two-hour deep dives, you name it, motorcycles, travel cars.

• 19:35Speaker 01

  Cooking shows for me.

• 19:36Dax Shepard?

  Cooking. Listen, with Premium, you don't have to keep the screen open. So I can lock my phone, slide it into my pocket and listen to a podcast while I'm folding laundry or working out. It's also completely ad-free, meaning when a narrator is building up to the climax of an insane story, there's zero interruption. And for travel, offline download saves the day. I love this one. Relying on airplane Wi-Fi can be a gamble, so I just download my favorite videos before takeoff. And with smart downloads, Premium will automatically download new videos from channels you actually follow without having to lift a finger. I'm covered if I forget to download a video I want to watch, or even if there's no service. And the home run for me is that YouTube Premium remembers exactly where I left off

• 20:18Dax Shepard?

  and lets me continue watching on another device from right where I stopped. So I can start a video on my TV while brushing my teeth and pick it right back up on my phone on my morning walk. So yeah, YouTube was already great, but Premium supercharges it. If you like YouTube, you'll love Premium. Try YouTube Premium for two months free at youtube.com/premium. Trial eligibility varies. Terms apply. Cancel anytime. We get support from Superhuman. I'm someone who wants to do big, meaningful work, but the small stuff eats up my day before I even get to it. The endless emails, docs, scheduling, follow-ups that pile up. By the time all that's cleared, there's no energy left for the ambitious stuff. Most AI tools promise to fix that, but they require opening a new tab,

• 21:03Dax Shepard?

  re-explaining everything from scratch every single time. A week later, it's just another thing collecting dust in the browser. Superhuman, from the makers of Grammarly, is different. It's already embedded inside the tools people are using, email, docs, browser. It's not waiting to be found. It's already there, working alongside, clearing what's in the way, so the focus stays on what's actually worth doing. A thought partner that's already up to speed, no catching it up. It knows the style, the workflows, and it backs people up without getting in the way. At your service, not after your job. That's the difference. Give it a try for yourself. Start streamlining your workflows with Superhuman. Try today at superhuman.com. We get support from Instagram Teen Accounts.

• 21:49Dax Shepard?

  So we talk a lot on this show about how the world is different now than when we were growing up. And one of the biggest differences is obviously social media. And I think a lot of people wonder, okay, what's actually being done to make it safer for teenagers?

• 22:01Speaker 01

  Which is a fair question.

• 22:02Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, so Instagram has got something called Teen Accounts, and they come with automatic protections built in by default. So anyone between 13 and 17 is automatically placed into this experience. They get age-appropriate content settings, contact limits, so that by default, only people they're already connected to can message them. And time management tools, daily time limit reminders, and also sleep mode that mutes notifications from 10:00 PM to 7:00 AM.

• 22:28Speaker 01

  Sleep mode is genius.

• 22:30Dax Shepard?

  Right? And here's the thing, for anyone under 16, a parent has to give permission to change any of those settings to be less strict. The guardrails are on, and Instagram keeps building new safety features to create age-appropriate experiences for teens.

• 22:45Speaker 01

  I am really glad Instagram's helping to give parents peace of mind with Teen Accounts.

• 22:49Dax Shepard?

  Learn more about Teen Accounts and Instagram's ongoing work to protect teens online at instagram.com/teenaccounts. We get support by Peloton. You know that feeling when you're spiraling over a problem and you just can't figure it out? When that happens to me, I need a change of pace. And I've found that running is the best way. It takes my brain out of the driver's seat and I come back with a fresh perspective. Running can be freeing and cathartic, and Peloton helps you feel all of that. And now that feeling fits wherever you need it with the new Peloton Tread Flex. It's movable and foldable, designed to fit your life. So next time you feel stuck, you can go for a run literally anywhere, whether that's in your office, living room, or even the attic.

• 23:34Dax Shepard?

  Plus, they have classes with expert instructors and programs to meet you at any level and keep you moving. Let yourself run. Explore the new Peloton Tread Flex at onepeloton.com.

• 23:55Speaker 04

  I ended up pushing my flight back a week, and Jack was going to come to Paris for his summer holiday instead of going to the south of France to see his family. So we both kind of changed what we were doing so drastically because we felt as though we had to see it through and have a romantic week together once he gets back after the weekend.

• 24:13Dax Shepard?

  And is he French?

• 24:14Speaker 04

  Yes. So now I had the last weekend with my best friend in Paris, and we went to a well-known techno club. Whenever we go to the club, we call the friends we make collecting Pokemon, because you kind of make these raw and open-hearted connections, have an amazing night together, form a misfit group, release them back into the world after, but then always have the lessons that they taught you in your back pocket. So we met these two really amazing guys, and I really hit it off with one of them. We'll call him Henry. We danced all night together, and then as a group, we went to an afters club. I made out with Henry and we talked a lot, but I didn't go home with him because I was excited in anticipation of seeing Jack, the reason that I had decided to stay in the first place.

• 24:59Speaker 04

  So Jack was getting back from the festival Monday. I said goodbye to my best friend and grieved her for the day while I waited to meet Jack at the train station, had my giant hiking backpack and all my stuff to go move in with him for 10 days.

• 25:12Dax Shepard?

  Oh, you guys are gonna go straight to sleeping in the same place?

• 25:15Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 25:16Speaker 04

  Yeah, I was going to stay with him in his apartment. We had never physically met before. The train banter was very successful. I'd also been bouncing around for three months, so I think I was primed and ready after going hostel to hostel to spend some time in someone's apartment and just people in general. So yeah, I'm at the train station, nervous and excited at the same time. And I finally see him. For a second, you have to get to know each other's physical bodies after just texting.

• 25:45Dax Shepard?

  Yeah.

• 25:45Speaker 04

  So we chat for a moment, and then he grabs my hand and we go to his beautiful apartment in the center of Paris.

• 25:52Dax Shepard?

  Oh, my gosh.

• 25:53Speaker 04

  We immediately get right into doing all the things we said we were going to over text. Afterwards, I was thinking, oh, this is perfect, exactly who and what I thought and was hoping this experience would be. And the next morning, he goes downstairs to this Asian restaurant next door to get takeout. And I'm like, yes, that sounds great. I don't feel like cooking after moving all my stuff and then having crazy monkey sex all evening, even though we had talked about how fun it would be to cook together. We eat and start watching this reality cooking show that he threw on. We had talked about the parks and rivers nearby his apartment, the botanical garden, and going to have picnics and eating amazing cheese and wine and reading together, just like all the things that I like to do, but would be so romantic to do with someone who could show me around the city.

• 26:37Speaker 04

  So looking forward to it. The conversation was there, the sexual energy was there, but over the first two days, I kept gently asking like, hey, do you want to go for a walk? Do you want to go get some stuff to make dinner? Do you want to go to work? And getting him to do any of the things he had advertised to me and said that he also liked to do was kind of like pulling teeth. But every time he would say like, it's too hot, I don't feel like it, no, but you can go if you want. It was just like very off-putting and a little bit depressing, not what I was expecting. So the libido starts to drop, the conversation gets a little less exciting, and he just wants to lay in front of the fan and watch the Sam cooking show.

• 27:17Speaker 01

  Oh, wait, how many days left when this is starting to happen?

• 27:22Speaker 04

  I was starting to get a little bit.

• 27:24Dax Shepard?

  They call it the ick now, right?

• 27:26Speaker 04

  Yeah, yeah. On like day two. It was just becoming a little bit triggering because I've had an ex-partner that struggled with depression and masking their personality, so I was recognizing the signs a little bit. And it's so difficult for everyone involved to be this intimate with someone who's struggling with mental health, but I'm not invested in this guy. I wish him best and we were getting along, but at this point, I would rather stay in a hostel and literally be alone than feel obligated to stay with him and just feel alone.

• 27:56Dax Shepard?

  Yes.

• 27:56Speaker 04

  The third night, I went out to a bar with my other friends, and he didn't want to come, of course. So then I ended up meeting a third party who's separate to the other two guys in the story, and sleeping with him in the park.

• 28:11Dax Shepard?

  Oh, wow, in the park.

• 28:16Speaker 04

  I had been out all night. I slept at his hostel, and then I rolled back up to Jack's apartment in the morning. No questions or cares, and I decided that I wasn't enjoying my time. And not only that, but I felt as though I knew he was struggling somehow. And if I were to stay, that I would feel like I was using him for a spot. I can accommodate myself. I don't need to be somewhere that I'm not feeling happy. So I showered and got my stuff together and sat him down to have a genuine conversation. It was pretty straight up, asking, are you okay? Like, are you struggling with depression? You aren't excited or even neutral about doing anything with me. He ended up opening up and saying yes, and he had been excited about the idea, but that he was struggling and he was sorry.

• 28:59Dax Shepard?

  Can I ask one quick question? So he just came from a Berlin festival.

• 29:03Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 29:03Dax Shepard?

  Okay, so he probably went fucking hard. The dude was probably rolling on Molly for three days straight, and you're dealing with the very predictable depression that follows three days later from the dopamine deficit.

• 29:15Speaker 04

  That could have totally played a role.

• 29:17Dax Shepard?

  He probably had zero dopamine.

• 29:18Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 29:20Speaker 04

  That totally relates to what he responded. I think it was cute with the language barrier. He was like, you're like a light in a jar too high on a shelf for me to reach.

• 29:27Dax Shepard?

  Oh, wow.

• 29:29Speaker 01

  That's so romantic, even though it's depressing.

• 29:33Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 29:35Speaker 04

  We together decided that I would leave and we would still be friends, and we are still friends to this day, and sometimes we have a cheeky sex.

• 29:41Dax Shepard?

  Oh, wow.

• 29:42Speaker 01

  Oh, my God. Is he happier now?

• 29:45Speaker 04

  He is happier now. He told me that he generally struggles with depression. So I immediately went to go put my stuff down in a hostel and just like re-centered real quick. And then very quickly remembered Henry, the guy that I had met at the techno club a few days ago. And I texted him and asked if he wanted to go on a date. So I met up with him in the park that same evening.

• 30:06Speaker 01

  The park is your spot.

• 30:08Speaker 04

  The park is everyone's spot like in Berlin and Paris. And we did have wine and cheese and he laid his head in my lap. And we talked about his job in the French military and childhoods and interests and dreams. And it felt like we were walking into space with conversation. It was very romantic. He said I could come back to his place and that he had drove. And when we were going to his car, we pulled up to his motorcycle and I was entranced by the

• 30:37Speaker 04

  We rode to the south of Paris. It was my first time on a motorcycle.

• 30:40Dax Shepard?

  You're in a movie now.

• 30:42Speaker 01

  Chocolat.

• 30:42Speaker 04

  Yeah, I didn't know we were going on a motorcycle. So I had a mini dress on. It was like blowing up in the wind. It felt so right and free and I felt so safe with him and like very proud of myself for not staying in turmoil with Jack out of any obligation. It just felt like I used my past experience to propel forward and learn from it. So I was able to spend the next week living with Henry. Quickly brought me back to my hostel the next morning to get my stuff and he brought it to his house and we truly had the summer fling, like falling in love experience despite expiration date. He was on his break in between getting a promotion in the military and I was going back to the States. So it was kind of a great sweet spot for both of us.

• 31:25Speaker 04

  We had some of the best and most athletic sex of my life, cooked together. We went for runs in the park.

• 31:31Speaker 01

  All the things you were promised, you did end up getting.

• 31:34Speaker 04

  When we departed, it was very sweet, but I feel like he truly raised the bar for my physical and emotional relationships. I keep throwing myself fully into the summer flings because it's corny, but it is also like collecting Pokemon like you love in life that they teach you in your back pocket for the

• 31:52Speaker 01

  Oh, that's great.

• 31:54Dax Shepard?

  I say go as hard as you can until you shut it down.

• 31:56Speaker 01

  Just do what you want to do.

• 31:57Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, when you get married and you have kids, you want to be a little lame bed and going, oh yeah, I did it all.

• 32:00Speaker 04

  Yeah, I'm working on it.

• 32:03Dax Shepard?

  What an exciting summer. Thanks for telling us that Hannah.

• 32:06Speaker 04

  Yeah, thank you guys so much for having me. I'm such a fan of the expert on experts day. I really appreciate you guys giving a platform to scientists right now.

• 32:15Speaker 01

  Oh, that's so nice.

• 32:16Dax Shepard?

  Our pleasure. Have a blast in Berlin.

• 32:18Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 32:19Dax Shepard?

  We're jealous. Take care.

• 32:20Speaker 01

  Bye. Hello.

• 32:23Dax Shepard?

  What fake name are we gonna say?

• 32:25Speaker 05

  I was actually gonna see if you wanted to pick one out for me.

• 32:28Dax Shepard?

  I immediately want to say Sarah because you look like my sister in law, Sarah.

• 32:31Speaker 01

  You do look like Sarah.

• 32:32Dax Shepard?

  And I love Sarah, so we're off to a great start.

• 32:35Speaker 05

  Okay, perfect. I love it.

• 32:36Dax Shepard?

  Okay, so you had a summer fling. Well, maybe you've had multiple summer flings, but you have one in particular you're gonna tell us about. Set the stage for us. What year was this?

• 32:46Speaker 05

  This was actually last summer.

• 32:47Dax Shepard?

  This is for a fresh fling.

• 32:49Speaker 05

  Yes. So my best friend's getting married. It's a bachelorette party. We're all college friends. So we're going down to her future in laws beach house. It's like a yacht club in Siesta Key, Sarasota area. So we go down, we're having fun. It's the first night. We all have our different outfits on and we have the theme going, everything. I like to drink tequila and when I drink too much tequila, my friends tell me that I get my tequila goggles on.

• 33:18Dax Shepard?

  They're helpful.

• 33:19Speaker 01

  Well, they're deceiving, they're deceiving.

• 33:21Dax Shepard?

  I think they're helpful in that you shouldn't be so picky.

• 33:25Speaker 01

  Why?

• 33:26Dax Shepard?

  Cause why we hung up on like, oh, you didn't have the perfect notes. But when you got a good amount of tequila and you're like, yeah, I ain't give a shit about all that stuff.

• 33:34Speaker 01

  The irony is that the glasses do the opposite. They make your eyes really bad.

• 33:38Dax Shepard?

  Well, exactly, which is kind of like healthy. That's my point.

• 33:41Speaker 01

  Okay, yeah, we're gonna agree to disagree on that. But for a fling, sure, go on.

• 33:45Dax Shepard?

  Okay.

• 33:46Speaker 05

  So we're going out to this club. It's a very well-known club, so I won't say the name. And when we walk in, it's just our bachelorette party. And I'm like, you know what? It's fine. We can make it fun. It'll be great. So we're having like dance battles with this other party that came in and like, we're just having fun. And then I noticed that one of the bouncers keeps like looking at me. And I'm like looking back and I'm like, guys, I don't know. Like, I think he's giving me the eyes and they're like, absolutely not. You cannot do this. They don't have their tequila goggles on. But in my head, when I have something I want to do, I'm gonna do it. So we're flirting and he's like, do you want to go out to my car and smoke a cigarette? And I'm like, sure, why not? We're on vacation, we're having fun. I'm one of the only single girls in the party.

• 34:31Speaker 05

  So I'm like, who cares? So I go out, we're smoking a cigarette in the back of his van, which he also lives in, which is important in the story.

• 34:41Speaker 01

  Do you want to revise? Do you want to revise?

• 34:45Dax Shepard?

  I wish you'd have said, do you want to come out and smoke a cigarette in my house?

• 34:50Speaker 05

  So we go out to his home and we're sitting in the back and we're smoking a cigarette. One thing leads to another. We do have a quickie in the back of his car before going back into the club.

• 35:01Speaker 01

  Right.

• 35:01Dax Shepard?

  This guy's got a mate. He's living in the parking lot of the club and he's allowed to leave during his shift and entertain in his van and then return to work. This seems like a dream.

• 35:10Speaker 05

  So we go back in and all my friends are like lined up near the pool table and they're like, what did you just do? And I'm like, don't worry, it's okay. Like I'm the chaotic friend. They're very used to it. I'm like, we're still gonna have a great night. So we're still flirting throughout the night and then I go over to him and I'm like, hey, by the way, like we're about to leave. He's like, great, take my number. He's texting me, I'm not responding. So I'm like, I'm with my friends, who cares? So he's like, but I really want to see you later tonight. And I'm like, okay. So we get back to the house at like 2:00 AM and all my friends are like, don't go. He could kill you. He lives in his van. Like we literally don't.

• 35:46Dax Shepard?

  He lives in his van.

• 35:47Speaker 01

  Literally.

• 35:48Dax Shepard?

  That's such a deal breaker generally.

• 35:49Speaker 01

  It is what they tell you to avoid. Don't get in someone's van.

• 36:02Dax Shepard?

  This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. If you've thought about trying therapy with our long-term partner, BetterHelp, insurance options may now be available nationwide with an average copay for eligible members of just $23 per session. October 10th is World Mental Health Day, but you don't need a day on the calendar to give yourself permission to talk to someone. I've been in therapy for a long time and the stuff rattling around in my head always just quiets down the second I say it out loud. And it doesn't have to be some big life crisis. Maybe it's a work thing that's taking up too much space or hard relationship moment, or just a feeling that something's off. That's enough. That's worth talking about.

• 36:39Speaker 01

  You know, I love therapy more than anything. Gets me through. Often I'll want to cancel because I'm like, I don't really have anything to talk about. And then I'll go and I have some major revelation.

• 36:51Dax Shepard?

  You know, I was just talking to a friend who has just started it. And I said, one of the most powerful elements of it is just hearing yourself say out loud the thing that's been ruminating in your head and how different it sounds once it's out into the world. You gain perspective immediately just by hearing yourself say it.

• 37:06Speaker 01

  Yeah, you do.

• 37:06Dax Shepard?

  If you've been waiting to start therapy, BetterHelp works with more than 125 health plan networks and eligible members have an average copay of just $23 per session with insurance. Don't have insurance or live outside the US? You can still get 10% off your first month. Do yourself a favor and just try it. Future you will be grateful. Visit betterhelp.com/dax to explore your payment options. That's better H E L P dot com slash DAX. We get support from our sponsor, Lilly. For adults with obesity or with excess weight and weight-related medical problems, it's time to find out about Foundo or for Gleepran. Foundo is a once daily prescription GLP-1 medicine used with a reduced calorie diet

• 37:50Dax Shepard?

  and increased physical activity to help adults with obesity or some adults with overweight who also have weight-related medical problems to lose excess body weight and keep the weight off.

• 38:00Speaker 06

  Foundo should not be used with other GLP-1 receptor agonist medicines. It is not known if Foundo is safe and effective for use in children. Don't take Foundo if you're allergic to it, or if you or someone in your family had major thyroid cancer or multiple endocrinialplasia syndrome type two. Stop and call your doctor right away if you have an allergic reaction, a lump or swelling in your neck, or severe stomach pain. Serious side effects may include inflamed pancreas and gallbladder problems. Tell your doctor if you experience vision changes, if you're nursing, pregnant, plant to be, or taking birth control pills, and before scheduled procedures with anesthesia. Taking Foundo with an insulin or sulfonylurea may cause low blood sugar. Side effects include diarrhea, nausea, and vomiting, which can cause dehydration and may cause kidney problems. Once Daily Foundo is available by prescription only in 0.8 milligram, 2.5 milligram, 5.5

• 38:45Speaker 06

  milligram, 9 milligram, 14.5 milligram, and 17.2 milligram tablets. Learn more at foundo.lilly.com or call 1-800-LILY-RX. Now is perfect to talk to your doctor about Foundo.

• 38:57Dax Shepard?

  This podcast is brought to you by Squarespace. We've talked before about Rob building our website on Squarespace and I bring it up again because it's a perfect example of what they do well. Rob had all the pieces, the content, the vision, the ideas, but he needed something to actually take all that and make it public facing. And Squarespace was that bridge. Maybe you're in the same spot. You've been developing something, a business, a skill set, a body of work, and it's been private. It's been yours, but at some point you're ready to put it out there and that transition from private to public can feel like a huge leap. Squarespace makes it feel like a step. Beautiful templates, built-in SEO, email campaigns, scheduling, analytics, everything

• 39:38Dax Shepard?

  you need to go from, I've been working on this to here it is, come find me. All in one place, no code, no stitching together a bunch of different tools. So if you've been sitting on something and waiting for the right moment, this might be it. Head to Squarespace.com/dax for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, use offer code DAX to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.

• 40:11Speaker 05

  So I share my locations with all my friends and I'm like, okay, guys, if I die, like you know where my body is, or at least my phone. This guy comes and picks me up at like 2:30 in the morning and he's like, oh, can I just park my van at this yacht club? And I'm like, I don't know if I want to do that. I don't want to disrespect like her future in-laws. Let's just drive somewhere. So we're driving through Siesta Key and he parks and he's like acting all fidgety and I'm like, is everything okay? Like my friends have my location in case you're gonna do anything. And he's like, okay, well, if the cops come, I need you to say that you were driving because I don't have a license.

• 40:46Dax Shepard?

  Okay.

• 40:47Speaker 05

  And I said, but you live in your van. So like, how do you not have a license?

• 40:51Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 40:52Speaker 05

  So I'm like, why don't we get out of the residential and like go somewhere else? So we end up going near the beach and it's like a little grove thing. So we parked there for the night. We're having beers. We hooked up and he keeps telling me over and over that like he's on this reality show. And I'm like, okay. But like, he never tells me the name of the reality show. He just keeps referring to himself as his nickname on the reality TV show.

• 41:18Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 41:19Dax Shepard?

  Okay. So you're with a very interesting gentleman here.

• 41:22Speaker 05

  And so I'm like, I don't really care what show you're on. I'm here for a good time, not a long time. Like, let's just figure it out. We fall asleep in the back of the van. I slept in his home.

• 41:31Speaker 01

  Wow. What a gentleman inviting you to stay over.

• 41:36Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, he didn't kick you out.

• 41:37Speaker 05

  I know.

• 41:38Dax Shepard?

  I don't know how he's gonna make you breakfast in the morning, but let's see.

• 41:41Speaker 05

  The bride sister texted me at 4:00 AM. She's like, are you alive? And I'm like, yep, I'm still good. I'm great. I'll be home soon. So he takes me back. Fast forward a little bit, we're at brunch and all of the girls are like, okay, like tell me about it. Like we're all together. So I'm just like going through it. And I'm like, he kept saying he was on some reality show, but like, I don't know what show it is. I'm like, well, this is his nickname. Like he keeps saying this is his nickname and that's all he's referring to himself to. So we looked him up and he was on Redneck Island.

• 42:11Dax Shepard?

  Okay. Never even heard of it, but I feel like I know exactly what the show is.

• 42:15Speaker 01

  It's pretty self-explanatory.

• 42:17Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 42:17Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 42:18Speaker 05

  And I was like, yep, that's him. I remember those tattoos. They're making fun of me. He calls me while we're at brunch and he's like, hey, you want to hang out at the beach today? And I'm like, no, like I'm with my girls. I'm over this. We're gonna have a bachelorette day. So then we end up going out that night. It was wig night, which all the bachelorettes are doing. I have an eighties rocker mullet on and like all the other girls have like long curly hair. And I'm like, whatever. So like, I'm gonna stick out like a sore thumb. So we go back to the same club because it was the best club. And I'm like, okay, maybe he's not working tonight because he was working yesterday. I walk in, there he is. And I'm like, ah shit. So we see each other and then he's like, hey, like I'm gonna get us a hotel room tonight

• 43:03Speaker 05

  so we don't have to stay in the van. And I'm like, no, like I have a flight tomorrow morning at 4:00 AM. I'm just gonna go home. We end up leaving that club, never talked to him again. Fast forward a week, the boy part of the trip is going down and like we all went to college with them too. So people are engaged and married and like dating the whole group. And so they all know the story because we're all friends and the girls told him. So they go to the club and they ask for this man by name because I know his name at this point. And they're like, hey, so-and-so here, like we just want to take a picture of him. The manager looks them all dead in the face and said, we have never had anybody with that name working at this club.

• 43:41Dax Shepard?

  Oh my God, he was just posing as a bouncer. So no wonder he's able to go out to the parking lot.

• 43:48Speaker 05

  When they told me that, I was like, who did I sleep with?

• 43:53Speaker 01

  Ew, that's so scary. And then so he went also back the next day. He wasn't working the next day. He went back there.

• 44:01Dax Shepard?

  Yes. Oh my Lord. If I were you, I would have had to watch as many episodes of that show as possible. Yeah. Did you do that?

• 44:09Speaker 05

  It's actually funny. I've never even looked up where to watch it. I'm like, I need to bury this in my past, but then when I saw this prompt, I was like, I have to do it.

• 44:18Dax Shepard?

  Okay, listen, I'm gonna watch it.

• 44:19Speaker 01

  He is on a reality show and yet he's still pretending to be a bouncer.

• 44:23Dax Shepard?

  He's a man of mystery, Monica.

• 44:25Speaker 01

  This is hard for me. I guess I have too high of an opinion of people on reality shows.

• 44:29Dax Shepard?

  I think you do. You gotta remember, I was on a reality show in a one-bedroom apartment in Santa Monica and my license was very much in jeopardy of being revoked.

• 44:39Speaker 01

  This is fantastic.

• 44:41Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, this is really fun.

• 44:41Speaker 01

  You accidentally had sex with a celebrity.

• 44:44Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, yeah, you fucked a famous guy.

• 44:45Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 44:47Speaker 05

  Yes. Could I do a quick shout out?

• 44:49Dax Shepard?

  Of course.

• 44:49Speaker 01

  Yes, please.

• 44:50Speaker 05

  So my sister, she's my best friend and we have like weekly debriefs about Armchair Anonymous. I told her that I submitted for the prompt. She does not know the full story. This is the first time she's gonna hear it. She said, don't tell me if you get on it, just give me a shout out. So this is my shout out to my sister Lauren.

• 45:09Dax Shepard?

  Oh, wonderful.

• 45:11Speaker 01

  That's so fun. Shout out Lauren.

• 45:12Dax Shepard?

  Hi Lauren. Oh, well, that was lovely. Thank you so much. It was great meeting you.

• 45:16Speaker 05

  Thanks. Great to meet you too.

• 45:17Dax Shepard?

  All right. Take care.

• 45:18Speaker 01

  Have a good day.

• 45:19Speaker 05

  You too.

• 45:19Dax Shepard?

  Bye. Hello.

• 45:22Speaker 07

  Hi. Hi, how's it going?

• 45:25Dax Shepard?

  Good. Oh, I love your voice. It's raspy.

• 45:27Speaker 07

  Thank you. I'm kind of sick, so it's not normally like this, but it's cool to see you guys.

• 45:32Dax Shepard?

  You should stay sick.

• 45:33Speaker 01

  Well, no.

• 45:34Dax Shepard?

  I think that sometimes like I've either been really sick or I threw my voice out because I was yelling too much and I'm like, yeah, I wish my voice was.

• 45:40Speaker 01

  Sick voice is cool.

• 45:41Speaker 07

  It is cool.

• 45:42Dax Shepard?

  What name should we come up with? And I feel like it should mirror your voice a little bit.

• 45:45Speaker 01

  Phoebe Buffet.

• 45:47Speaker 07

  Phoebe's good.

• 45:48Dax Shepard?

  It was Holden Caulfield's sister in Catcher in the Rye. It's got a really good literature history. Okay, so Phoebe, you had a summer fling?

• 45:55Speaker 07

  This is very recent, just a month ago.

• 45:57Dax Shepard?

  This summer?

• 45:58Speaker 07

  Yes.

• 45:58Speaker 01

  Brand new press.

• 46:00Dax Shepard?

  Hot off the presses.

• 46:01Speaker 07

  So to set the stage, I went to Europe with my best friend and her boyfriend this summer and we did a couple different things, but one of the pieces of the trip was going backpacking. I had gone through a breakup earlier this year, so I was kind of manifesting like some hookup or a spicy make out or something on this trip. But when we were backpacking, I was like, oh, it won't be that. It'll be like at a Spanish club or something like that. So we signed up for this group trip. It was with a bunch of strangers to go hut to hut backpacking. So it's essentially like little mountain cabins and they have a bunch of cots and so you're sleeping with a lot of strangers and then you backpack during the day and you do like group meals so you don't have to carry any food or tent or anything.

• 46:45Speaker 07

  So it's kind of like bougie backpacking. We signed up for this group trip and my expectations are very low. I've done group trips before and it's been entirely women and maybe like one random middle-aged guy. But when we got there, there were three guys in their twenties and thirties and my friends and I were scheming, we're like, okay, maybe one of them will hit it off. We'll see what happens. And so we got on the trip. We take our little taxi up into the mountains and the way it was set up was we stayed in a hotel, a hut, a hut, a hostel, and then a hut, and then another hotel. So it was different combinations every night, kind of all over the place, but really fun. So the first night we're in a hut and there's like 30 people. I'm trying to suss out the vibes.

• 47:30Speaker 07

  One of the guys and I seem to be vibing with each other a little bit, but he's very artsy, very in his head. And I was like, I don't know if this is mutual or not. So I'm just filling out the first few days. The second night that we're in a hut, it's like Charlie and the Chocolate Factory style. It's like one long mattress and it's my best friend, her boyfriend, me, and then this guy who we will call Ryan. And we're like kind of nudging each other in our sleep, but without really acknowledging it, I'm like, I wonder if I should make a move. I'm like, no, it's too risky. He might be fully asleep. I don't know if these bumps are intentional, so I don't do anything.

• 48:10Speaker 07

  And then the next day we are in a hostel and I kind of dropped a clue to the group earlier. I was like, oh, I'm gonna go for like a nighttime walk this evening if anyone wants to join. Try to go see the stars because the sun set really late where we were in northern Spain. So you didn't see the stars until like 11:30 PM. So I say that a few hours before the end of the evening and then don't really bring it up. And then it's an open invite to the group. And then later that evening, we're both getting ready for bed at the same time and we both walk out of the bathroom at the same time. And I was like, oh, hey, Ryan, do you want to still go for a walk tonight? And he's like, oh yeah, sure, I'll go. And so we go for a stroll, but then it's so beautiful.

• 48:55Speaker 07

  I'm like enamored by the mountains. I'm like get distracted and then I get too nervous to make a move. So I'm like, okay, maybe the next day. I can't tell if he's flirting, he's just very polite, very friendly. And he had also gone through a breakup earlier this year after like seven years. So I was like, we're in the same boat, but maybe he's not at the same place with healing from his last relationship. So I was taking it safe. And then the next night is our last night in a hut and we called it the Pizza Hut because they have like fresh pizza when you get there.

• 49:25Dax Shepard?

  Ooh, don't you want to take this trip?

• 49:28Speaker 07

  It's amazing. Everyone should go. It's called Pico de Europa. So we get to the last hut and again, it's like 30 people, a bunch of strangers coming in. There's trail runners, there's young hot people everywhere and older hot people. And one of my friends was like, Kelsey, instead of Ryan, like you should go after this guy who's like openly talking about his open relationship with his wife. And I was like, oh, maybe, maybe that. And I'm like, no, no, no, we'll wait and see. And so we get these assorted cot numbers and it's numbered for a locker and then a cot for you to sleep in. And you're like right next to each other, maybe two inches of space at night when you're sleeping.

• 50:09Speaker 07

  My friend like grabbed me randomly key number seven and then her boyfriend had grabbed key number eight and then she's like, put it back. And then Ryan came up to the hut later and happened to grab key number eight out of the 35 beds that there are. So I was like, okay, that feels kind of serendipitous. And so we're going to bed and there's like a random old man snoring super loud in the corner and there's like 15 of us in this room. And I was like, okay, it's now or never. I gotta make a move. Like it's so beautiful outside, but I was like, I can't whisper because this is such a cramped quarters. Like someone's on my group trip is gonna hear me ask this guy if he wants to go make out outside and then it's gonna be just weird for the whole group the next day. Cause we had 12 people that were all strangers traveling around Spain together.

• 50:54Speaker 07

  So I decided to type a note out on my phone as we're going to bed. And so I type out, I'm like, this may be way too bold of me to ask and I might be reading the vibes wrong and no offense at all, if you're not feeling the same way, but would you want to wake me up later once the stars are out and go make out outside?

• 51:13Speaker 07

  And he had already fallen asleep.

• 51:14Speaker 01

  Oh my god.

• 51:17Speaker 07

  So he like kinda woke up startled and he was like, yeah, that sounds nice. And I was like, okay, that doesn't sound convincing. And then thirty seconds later, he's like, I'm so sorry, I was just waking up. That does sound really wonderful. We should go do that. And I was like, great, okay. Then I fall asleep for like an hour. He nudges me awake and then he's like, do you still wanna go outside? I'm like, yeah. So we tried to quietly come out of this hut, even though it's like creaky wood everywhere and so many people. And we walk outside and we're looking at the stars and it's just a ring of mountains around us. It's like you're in a planetarium with the stars above you and it's just picture perfect. So we're just chatting and I'm like getting distracted by the stars again. And he's like, so did you wanna kiss? And I was like, yes.

• 52:02Speaker 07

  So we start making out and it's immediate chemistry. Romance vibes are very high. We're very into each other. And after a few minutes, I stop him and I'm like, wouldn't it be so crazy if we had sex in the mountains? Under the stars, just laying out on these rocks. And he was like, yeah, yeah, that would be amazing. And I was like, okay, again, he sounds a little hesitant. And then I was like, are you into it? Like, we can totally keep making out if you want. I'm like, have you like slept with anyone since your last relationship? And he's like, yeah, I like slept with someone. It's not bad. And I was like, okay, what is it? He's like, I just don't think I'm gonna last very long.

• 52:42Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, yeah, very, very honest.

• 52:45Speaker 01

  That's honest and flattering.

• 52:48Speaker 07

  Yeah, I was like, oh, I'm flattered. And also it's twelve thirty and we're laying on rocks, so it doesn't matter.

• 52:53Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 52:54Speaker 07

  And then he was like, also, I didn't bring a condom. And I was like, don't worry, I have some.

• 53:00Speaker 01

  No, oh, you, I love this. You are so prepared.

• 53:03Dax Shepard?

  I mean, like a type A kind of.

• 53:05Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 53:06Speaker 07

  This is very type A Summer Fling. Yeah, I'm gonna be prepared for anything. And it's just funny because people were making fun of how heavy my backpack was. He's like, oh, so this is what you're carrying? And so I run back to the hut and I get the condom. And then we lay down in the grass, flipping who's on their back so the other person can look at the stars.

• 53:26Speaker 01

  Wow, very respectful.

• 53:28Speaker 07

  We go back to the hut, sneak in and go to bed. We kinda fall asleep, sort of holding hands a little bit. And so the next day, we're like hiking with our whole group the whole day. We're trying to be sneaky about it because we don't wanna throw off the vibes of the group trip. And so I don't even tell my best friend that's on the trip with me until like seven PM that night. I'm like, okay, maybe that was a one-time thing. And then that night, we're in a hotel because it's the last night that we're with the whole group. And I can tell at the end of the night, he's kinda lingering in the lobby. I was collecting money to tip our guides and he'd already given me money. And I walked up to him and I was like, so should I come to your room tonight? And he was like, yeah, yeah, let's do that.

• 54:09Speaker 07

  And so I go up to his room and then we have sex again and it's wonderful. And we fall asleep talking about our breakups and it's just like very therapeutic. And I forgot to mention, I kinda like snuck out of my room again. I was rooming with this girl from Poland and I just had to tell a little white lie. I was like, I'm gonna go hang out with my friends. You can leave the lights off, like, don't worry, I probably won't be back for a little while. And then I was able to like sneak back in at five AM and no one suspected a thing. And then we were done with the group portion of the trip. They're driving us back to the city in Spain where everyone was flying out from.

• 54:49Speaker 07

  And everyone was flying out that day except for my friends and then Ryan. And I was like, again, what a great coincidence this is. We're going back to the town and we meet up in the city center. And we're like, okay, well, we have to do something fun today. We gotta like keep hanging out. So we meet up for this like six-course lunch. And then we go to a beach and it's a topless beach and it's my first topless beach ever.

• 55:15Speaker 01

  Oh, wow.

• 55:17Speaker 07

  We're laying on the beach and it's great.

• 55:19Dax Shepard?

  And did you go topless?

• 55:20Speaker 07

  Of course, you have to.

• 55:22Speaker 01

  Did everyone, all your friends?

• 55:24Speaker 07

  No.

• 55:25Speaker 01

  Look at you.

• 55:27Speaker 07

  And Ryan was very respectful. I didn't make a big deal out of it or anything. But I was like, okay, bucket list checked. That evening, we all went for late night Spanish dinner. And we're having drinks and talking about like childhood trauma, all four of us together. And then it's kind of unspoken that I'm gonna go back to his hotel with him instead of my friend's Airbnb. And so we're walking back and we just hiked like forty-five miles. And so we were a little tired. We didn't really wanna like full on go dancing. And we stumbled on at eleven thirty at night, this like Spanish contemporary dance performance in front of this old town square. And there are hundreds of people watching and all these lights going off. And it was so beautiful.

• 56:09Speaker 07

  And then we're there just in time for the finale where this very slow Spanish song started playing. Hundreds of people are singing along and starting to slow dance. And it was like a movie set.

• 56:21Dax Shepard?

  Oh my god, I'm in love.

• 56:22Speaker 01

  I know.

• 56:23Speaker 07

  Forgot to say he writes films. I was like, he's gonna have to make a movie about this. And then it turns into like a DJ set at the very end. And we go down and we're in the dance circle. And then at midnight, they like cut it off. It felt like a very Cinderella moment. And then we were walking back to this hotel and we're just like humming in the streets, singing and dancing and everything. And we go up to his hotel, spend the night together again, fall asleep, like talking about our lives and childhood and everything. And in the morning, we go out for breakfast and we're walking around the town and it's really lovely. And then we realize that, I'm like, well, I have everything and you're flying out today and I'm going back to my friends.

• 57:08Speaker 07

  So we like say goodbye in the middle of the street, like it was a movie, like with people rushing past us. And I put my hand on his cheek and gave him a really soft kiss and I was like, bye, Ryan. Turned around, walked off and then was skipping and like smiling back to my friend's place. And that was that.

• 57:28Dax Shepard?

  I'm welled up. I'm so happy for you. I'm so glad you had that experience.

• 57:34Speaker 01

  Were you like lovesick after? Like, did you miss him?

• 57:37Speaker 07

  No, it was crazy. It felt like the most perfect thing that both of us needed. Post-long relationships being over.

• 57:45Dax Shepard?

  Lets you know your heart still works.

• 57:47Speaker 01

  Oh, what a happy story.

• 57:49Dax Shepard?

  I know, I'm really moved by that.

• 57:51Speaker 07

  He is an American. He lives in New York.

• 57:54Speaker 01

  Call me.

• 57:57Dax Shepard?

  If you're not gonna take him, then call me. I wonder if you guys will ever have another rendezvous.

• 58:03Speaker 07

  I know, we have each other's phone numbers and his birthday was like a week after the trip ended. And so I texted like a vague message where I was like, I hope our paths cross again someday and have a wonderful birthday and everything. And he just kinda reiterated that. So it just kinda felt like a little bow on top of a little rom-com.

• 58:21Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, that's a beautiful summer fling.

• 58:24Speaker 01

  That is.

• 58:25Dax Shepard?

  I feel like I'm on my period or something.

• 58:28Dax Shepard?

  Oh, like, why, why am I?

• 58:29Speaker 01

  You are like crying.

• 58:31Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 58:31Speaker 01

  Oh my god, you literally have a tear.

• 58:33Dax Shepard?

  I was looking at your little face and I was picturing my little Delta. You know, a trip like that?

• 58:43Dax Shepard?

  I was like, oh, I love this person. She's like Delta. Oh.

• 58:47Speaker 01

  They're all like Delta.

• 58:49Dax Shepard?

  Literally, I had that thought, Monica. I was like, man, if I could just see everyone was Delta, I would just love everyone so much.

• 58:55Speaker 01

  Yeah. Wow, this took such, this took such a crazy turn.

• 59:03Dax Shepard?

  Okay, wow. Yeah, so that was all the things that were happening to me.

• 59:06Speaker 07

  I was going to let out the emotions.

• 59:09Dax Shepard?

  You're so sweet. I like that story so much.

• 59:11Speaker 01

  Yes, me too, me too.

• 59:12Speaker 07

  Well, thank you for letting me tell it.

• 59:14Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, my period will start soon. This will all be over.

• 59:16Speaker 01

  Okay, don't know. Guess who's on their period? Me, and I have not a tear in sight. But I am moved. I do think that was such a special story.

• 59:25Dax Shepard?

  Oh, yeah, that was really lovely. That made me so happy. Do you have any shout outs?

• 59:28Speaker 07

  Yes, my friend Summer, she's wonderful. She also listens to like every Armchair Anonymous episode and we talk about it all the time.

• 59:35Dax Shepard?

  Big shout out to Summer.

• 59:36Speaker 01

  Summer.

• 59:37Dax Shepard?

  Summer, we love you. Thanks for listening.

• 59:38Speaker 01

  Summer Fling.

• 59:39Dax Shepard?

  Really ding ding ding.

• 59:40Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 59:41Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, it's perfect.

• 59:42Speaker 01

  Thanks for chatting with us.

• 59:43Dax Shepard?

  Have a great rest of your summer.

• 59:45Speaker 07

  You too.

• 59:46Dax Shepard?

  All right, bye bye.

• 59:48Dax Shepard?

  Oh, well, that was great.

• 59:49Speaker 01

  All right.

• 59:49Dax Shepard?

  That was fun.

• 59:50Speaker 01

  That was fun and that was hopeful.

• 59:52Dax Shepard?

  Love you.

• 59:56Speaker 03

  Do you wanna sing a tune or something? We'll have a theme song.

• 1:00:00Dax Shepard?

  Okay, great.

• 1:00:01Speaker 03

  We don't have a theme song for this new show, so here I go, go, go. We're gonna ask some random questions and with the help of Armchair's, we'll get some suggestions. On the fire, Ryan dish. On the fire, Ryan dish. Enjoy.