Armchair Anonymous: Study Abroad

Dax and Monica talk to Armcherries! In today's episode, Armcherries tell us a crazy study abroad story. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Dax Shepard?

  Welcome, welcome, welcome to Armchair Anonymous. I'm Dan Shepard and I'm joined by Monica Padman.

• 0:05Speaker 01

  Hi.

• 0:05Dax Shepard?

  This is a prompt that originated with an experience you had, which was studying abroad.

• 0:11Speaker 01

  I studied abroad twice. Best times.

• 0:15Dax Shepard?

  Best abroad ever?

• 0:16Speaker 01

  Best times.

• 0:17Dax Shepard?

  Best studies ever or abroad?

• 0:19Speaker 01

  You know, one thing on my first study abroad, that's when I first found David Sedaris.

• 0:23Dax Shepard?

  Oh, really?

• 0:24Speaker 01

  Uh huh. I, before going, went to Target with my mom, got a book for the plane and the trip, and it was Me Talk Pretty One Day.

• 0:32Dax Shepard?

  Oh, really? That was your intro?

• 0:33Speaker 01

  And it was a perfect one because he is talking about language. There's some travel in there. So first entree into Mr. Sedaris.

• 0:43Dax Shepard?

  Mine was Carrie read naked and told me I had to read it.

• 0:46Speaker 01

  She read naked?

• 0:48Dax Shepard?

  That was his first book.

• 0:49Speaker 01

  Oh, Carrie?

• 0:50Dax Shepard?

  Read Sedaris.

• 0:52Speaker 01

  The book naked and, and.

• 0:54Dax Shepard?

  Told me.

• 0:55Speaker 01

  Recommended it. Okay.

• 0:56Dax Shepard?

  Well, you have to read this. I said, okay, I'll do that.

• 1:00Speaker 01

  Let's keep talking about it.

• 1:01Dax Shepard?

  Happy birthday, Trishy and Carrie, by the way. They just, yeah, they just had their 50th, the twinsees.

• 1:06Speaker 01

  Happy birthday.

• 1:06Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, I love them both. Okay, please enjoy crazy study abroad stories. We get support from Quince.

• 1:14Speaker 01

  I have to say, I am so ready for fall. I want sweaters. I've been craving a true crisp morning where I actually need a jacket. I can't wait.

• 1:23Dax Shepard?

  I'm fully there. The second it dips below 70, I'm like, this is my season. Give me the layers, give me the boots, give me a reason to wear something other than a t-shirt. And honestly, that's why I love Quince because fall is when your wardrobe actually has to show up and everything at Quince is 50 to 80% less than similar brands. We're talking 100% Mongolian cashmere sweaters, starting at $60.

• 1:46Speaker 01

  $60. $60 for cashmere that you'd expect from a luxury brand without the luxury price tag. It's amazing. Gets me every time. It really shouldn't be real, but it is because they go straight to the factories, they skip the middlemen, and they just hand you the savings. The stuff isn't trendy. It's the kind of pieces you grab over and over because they work every time.

• 2:04Dax Shepard?

  The 100% Mongolian cashmere sweaters for me are it. When I look at Steve McQueen, this man owned a couple of sweaters he wore all the time and he looks iconic.

• 2:13Speaker 01

  It's a uniform.

• 2:14Dax Shepard?

  Mm hmm.

• 2:14Speaker 01

  And Quince isn't just about the clothes. They have hotel quality bedding, cookware, bath essentials, thoughtfully designed furniture. You can really go there and outfit your entire apartment or house. So if you're in need of any kind of fall refresh at home too, same quality, same attention to detail for every corner of your life.

• 2:32Dax Shepard?

  Find your next fall favorites at Quince. Download the Quince app for app exclusive offers or go to quince.com. Get free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. Now available in Canada and the UK too. And when Quince asks where you heard about them, let them know it was Armchair Expert. It's the best way to support the show. This episode is presented by YouTube Premium. YouTube was already great, but Premium supercharges it. If you like YouTube, you'll love Premium. Try YouTube Premium for two months free at youtube.com/premium. Trial eligibility varies. Terms apply. Cancel anytime. Now let's get into today's episode.

• 3:32Speaker 02

  Hi.

• 3:32Dax Shepard?

  Can you hear us?

• 3:33Speaker 02

  Hi, I can hear you.

• 3:35Dax Shepard?

  Is it Blair?

• 3:36Speaker 02

  It is.

• 3:37Dax Shepard?

  Blair, where are you?

• 3:39Speaker 02

  East coast of Florida in Satellite Beach.

• 3:42Speaker 01

  Your shirt says FSU.

• 3:44Dax Shepard?

  Is that north or south of Daytona?

• 3:46Speaker 02

  It's about an hour and a half south. It's about 20 minutes south of like Cocoa Beach, Cape Canaveral, where the rocket ships take off.

• 3:53Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, just a little north of Fort Pierce?

• 3:56Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 3:56Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 3:58Speaker 02

  Today was a college day, so I had to represent my, my college.

• 4:01Dax Shepard?

  And you're doing it well.

• 4:02Speaker 01

  Today's college day? Uh oh.

• 4:04Dax Shepard?

  Well, what does that mean?

• 4:05Speaker 02

  Study abroad. So I figured.

• 4:06Speaker 01

  Oh, duh.

• 4:08Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, yeah, we're just catching up.

• 4:09Speaker 01

  I'm about to start my period.

• 4:11Dax Shepard?

  She's, yeah, she's all, she's all a tither, a titter.

• 4:14Speaker 02

  I can understand.

• 4:15Dax Shepard?

  She's upside down. Okay, you have a study abroad story.

• 4:19Speaker 02

  Yes. Okay, so this story takes place in the spring of 2005. I was a junior at Florida State and I went and studied abroad for the semester on Semester at Sea.

• 4:29Dax Shepard?

  Oh, hold on. I need to know what goes behind that decision because that's a little different than go to Europe and have some fun.

• 4:35Speaker 02

  Right. Well, studying abroad in Florida was not ever really a thing. You know, I know a lot of people as juniors, they study abroad here. It just wasn't even really an option. But my cousin, she was going and we were at a wedding together a couple of months before it started and she was like, you should come. And so we looked into it and it worked. So I signed up and went with my cousin. Coincidentally, there were a couple of people from high school that I knew going on. And then there was a couple, you know, other people that I knew through these connections.

• 5:04Dax Shepard?

  And what kind of ship is it? Is it like a cruise ship, a working ship, a cargo ship?

• 5:09Speaker 02

  So it is a small cruise ship that they turn into a school essentially. So like the ballroom, the casinos, all the auxiliary rooms are turned into classrooms. When you're sailing from one port to the other, you're in class. So it could be Monday, it could be Sunday, you're in class. And they had classes that, you know, you could take towards your major. So you were just kind of continuing your education. And then when you got to port, you were in port for about a week and during that week, you didn't have to go to class.

• 5:36Speaker 01

  Oh, fun.

• 5:38Dax Shepard?

  Okay, I'm now in.

• 5:40Speaker 01

  Yeah, you love cruises.

• 5:41Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, I kind of thought she was gonna be on like a fucking fishing vessel, like a maritime academy type experience where you're a crew of a boat.

• 5:50Speaker 01

  Study abroad's are supposed to be fun, not stupid.

• 5:55Speaker 02

  Yeah. So there were about 600 students. There was a group of retired people who could have paid to go on and they just sailed with us and they got to sit on any classes they wanted to sit on. And then they got to travel and go around the world.

• 6:07Dax Shepard?

  Oh, boy.

• 6:08Speaker 02

  So our itinerary was, we started in Vancouver. The plan was to go South Korea, Japan, Shanghai, Hong Kong, Vietnam, Cambodia, India, Kenya, South Africa.

• 6:22Speaker 01

  Oh, my God.

• 6:23Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 6:24Dax Shepard?

  This is a dream. Cruise around the world.

• 6:27Speaker 01

  And stay in all these places for a week.

• 6:29Dax Shepard?

  Yes.

• 6:30Speaker 02

  Yeah. And then we went Brazil, Venezuela, and finished in Fort Lauderdale. So fortunately for me, I got home and I was home. It's literally a trip around the world. It's the whole semester from January to April. All in all, it's spoiler alert, it was a wonderful experience and something you can't ever replicate in your lifetime. So we took off from Vancouver in January and the plan was to go across the Pacific Ocean and land in South Korea. So this was almost a two week journey. Pacific Ocean is very large and we're crossing the Pacific Ocean. And as soon as we took off, day one, the seas were a little rocky. Everybody was seasick. So there were barf bags in every railing of every staircase.

• 7:12Speaker 01

  I don't want to go anymore.

• 7:13Dax Shepard?

  You're out.

• 7:14Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 7:15Dax Shepard?

  I'm still in.

• 7:16Speaker 02

  I am terrified of throw up. So this is my worst nightmare. I would open my door to walk out to class in the morning and there'd be trails of vomit in the hallway.

• 7:24Dax Shepard?

  Oh, my Lord. Oh, wow. Yes.

• 7:26Speaker 01

  What's it called? Triangle of sadness?

• 7:28Dax Shepard?

  Ding ding ding.

• 7:28Speaker 02

  There were men posted near all the classrooms with like buckets. So if people didn't make it to bat, I mean, it was a nightmare. You had to carry your tray of food and, you know, sit and eat and like hold your food while you ate it. Everything was a hassle.

• 7:41Dax Shepard?

  How was sleeping? Would it wake you up or did you sleep right through it?

• 7:44Speaker 02

  At the beginning, sleeping was tough. Eventually it got a little easier.

• 7:48Dax Shepard?

  Yeah. Rock-a-bye baby by the end.

• 7:50Speaker 02

  Right. And once the seasickness wore off and you kind of got your equilibrium.

• 7:53Dax Shepard?

  Your sea life.

• 7:54Speaker 02

  Balanced out. Yes.

• 7:55Speaker 01

  Do you have a seatbelt in the bed?

• 7:59Speaker 02

  We probably needed one.

• 8:00Speaker 01

  You should have. It's like when you're on a plane, they tell you to keep your seatbelt on.

• 8:04Speaker 02

  Well, that leads me to about a week into this trip. We were in the middle of the Pacific and three storms had come together and made one giant storm. And we woke up in the middle of the night and my bed had detached from the wall, had slid across to the other side of the room. And the foot of the bed was wedged under like the vanity. So had completely moved to the other side of the room. PBs had fallen out. I mean, everything was demolished. So as we're waking up to this, we start to hear the sirens. Get the life vest, remain calm, get in the hallway. So we put our life vests on, middle of the night, we're sitting in the hallway, just waiting and waiting and waiting. We don't really have any information. Eventually they call again, remain calm, but you need to report to your mustard station.

• 8:48Speaker 02

  So we go to the top couple of floors of this cruise ship. Now meanwhile, I'm about a week in. I don't know too many people other than the handful of people that I knew. So here I am thinking, I'm just gonna die by myself, you know, on the ship with nobody that I know. So I go up to whatever floor I was on and I'm standing on the landing. They're separating men from women.

• 9:07Dax Shepard?

  They don't want to hang you, panky.

• 9:08Speaker 01

  No, it's a Titanic situation. They want to get the women and children off first.

• 9:12Dax Shepard?

  As they should. But what if it was because people were like, fuck, we might die. Should we bang now? And they were trying to limit.

• 9:17Speaker 01

  It is a college study abroad.

• 9:21Speaker 02

  I don't think anyone would be paying attention. There was a lot going on. So it's a good time. But then I'm standing on the landing. I spot one of my friends and we run into each other's arms. And I think, okay, at least if I'm gonna die, I'm gonna go down with Jenna and Jenna and I are gonna survive, you know, go through this together.

• 9:35Speaker 01

  Oh, my God. You guys are the Jack and Rose of the study abroad ship.

• 9:39Dax Shepard?

  Are those the character names in Titanic?

• 9:41Speaker 01

  Yes, how dare you.

• 9:42Dax Shepard?

  Okay. Now, quick question. I've been on a few cruises and mustard station, this means like we might be getting into the boats. How are getting into tinier boats gonna be advantageous in an enormous storm? Like, don't we want to stay on the big old cruise ship?

• 9:55Speaker 02

  Well, we never got to that. I don't even know if that was the plan, to be honest. We just had to get out from below and we had to get up on the top decks so we could do whatever step was next. Jenna and I are standing there. The sun's starting to come up at this point. So the boat's rocking and you look out the window and all you see is skies and then you see ocean. And then you see skies and then you see ocean. Later on, I heard that if our boat had tipped just a few more degrees, we would have capsized.

• 10:19Dax Shepard?

  Oh.

• 10:21Speaker 02

  So eventually here's where the men and women come in. I don't know if this is their intention, but eventually we're moved to the rooms that we're gonna sit in for the next 12 hours while we wait for this to pass. I was in a room in like the dining area. So we had to sit where the men had their legs straddled and we had to sit between their legs, basically sitting in their lap because we're swaying from side to side so bad.

• 10:42Dax Shepard?

  This is like your guys' acting exercise.

• 10:44Speaker 02

  Yeah, breathing in each other's mouth.

• 10:46Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 10:46Speaker 02

  And I told you this is not real.

• 10:49Dax Shepard?

  Are you so in a state of life and death? This doesn't cross your mind or are you thinking, I hope I get assigned to a handsome man?

• 10:55Speaker 01

  I was just thinking that, like, do you get to pick your partner for leg sitting?

• 10:59Dax Shepard?

  Then the last thing that happens to them before they die is they don't get picked.

• 11:03Speaker 01

  I know. It's so sad.

• 11:05Speaker 02

  It did run through my head, like, maybe I'm tied to this person for life.

• 11:08Speaker 01

  Me cute, yeah.

• 11:09Speaker 02

  The ultimate me cute, and it didn't go that way. I couldn't pick out this person to line up now. And since we were in the dining hall, we were next to the kitchen. And in the kitchen, you could hear all the pots and pans and plates and everything just smash and then smash.

• 11:22Dax Shepard?

  Really is triangle.

• 11:23Speaker 01

  Yeah, it is.

• 11:24Speaker 02

  For hours and hours this went on. So, you know, everyone's delirious, we're hungry, they're passing out cheese sandwiches because they can't cook, you know, it's just a nightmare. So what actually happened is the waves were 30 to 50 feet.

• 11:37Dax Shepard?

  Oh, hold on a second. 30 to 50 feet?

• 11:41Speaker 01

  Oh my god.

• 11:42Dax Shepard?

  Five story waves?

• 11:43Speaker 01

  This is a true nightmare.

• 11:46Dax Shepard?

  What was your fear level? Had you come to peace with I'm gonna die? Like, what was the journey over those 12 hours of just how afraid you were or were not? Was everyone shockingly calm? What was the vibe?

• 11:57Speaker 02

  I remember people being shockingly calm. Now, keeping in mind, we'd been on the boat for like a week dealing with this kind of weather, obviously not this extreme, but we'd been in it and we knew that the seas were rough. I had heard at one point, if my memory serves me correctly, that this was the first time that they had done it across the Pacific in the winter. So they were unaware of how the storms would affect the boat. So what happened was a 50 foot wave hit the bridge, shattered the glass. The whole control panel was electric, so it shorted out the control panel. They couldn't control the boat. Two of the three engines shut down.

• 12:32Dax Shepard?

  Oh my god.

• 12:34Speaker 02

  We basically had to just sit there and wait it out and wait for the storm to pass in order for the Coast Guard to be able to come out and rescue us.

• 12:42Dax Shepard?

  And you're like a week out from port. It's gonna take the Coast Guard an eternity, I'd imagine.

• 12:47Speaker 02

  Yes, it took a couple of days for the Coast Guard to come out and then they had to tow us back to Hawaii. And we stayed in Hawaii while they fixed the boat. Now, an interesting fact, when we were going across the Pacific, we had crossed the international date line. Are you familiar?

• 13:02Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 13:02Speaker 02

  So we had crossed this and then the next day or that day, whatever the timeline was, we had to cross back over it. So the day that this all happened was just a lost day. So then people kind of say it's like the day that never happened.

• 13:14Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 13:14Speaker 02

  It was a Monday, we went into Tuesday and then we went back to Tuesday and then it's like the day never happened. So we really were out in the middle of the Pacific. So they towed us to Hawaii and we stayed in Hawaii for about a week while they were fixing up the boat, figuring out a plan of what to do. So we ended up missing South Korea and Japan. And then they took the 600 students from Hawaii and they flew us to Shanghai. From Shanghai, they flew us to Hong Kong. Hong Kong, they flew us to Vietnam.

• 13:43Speaker 01

  So now it just became a...

• 13:44Dax Shepard?

  It became a flight?

• 13:44Speaker 01

  Oh, I love this.

• 13:45Speaker 02

  Now it's luxury.

• 13:46Dax Shepard?

  Study at air?

• 13:47Speaker 02

  Yes, and they had to put us up in hotels.

• 13:49Dax Shepard?

  Oh my gosh.

• 13:51Speaker 01

  So this is a blessing in disguise story as well.

• 13:55Speaker 02

  So once we were in Vietnam, the boat was fixed. It came and met us in Ho Chi Minh City. And when port was done, we got on the boat, we set sail and we finished the semester and everybody was fine.

• 14:06Dax Shepard?

  And you hit all those locations?

• 14:08Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 14:08Speaker 02

  Yep. So then we went everywhere else, from Shanghai, we went Cambodia, India, and then continued on. And this was like the first couple of weeks of this adventure. So when you're a couple of months in, you kind of forget about it, scarred everybody pretty badly, but you just went about the rest of the trip and we finished the trip. I think there were two people, from what I've heard and looked up, that got hurt. One was one of the people that worked on the ship, hurt his shoulder, must have banged into something. And then one of the retired elderly passengers hurt their hip. No students were injured. Maybe a handful, if that, went home after this because you had the option. People were traumatized.

• 14:45Dax Shepard?

  Yeah. I might have been out after that start.

• 14:48Speaker 01

  I think I'm going home.

• 14:48Dax Shepard?

  Like, because how many warnings was this one person need to go like, oh yeah, this is not to be trusted?

• 14:52Speaker 01

  Well, I'll probably go on the flying part, but once the boat comes back, I'm like, I think it's time for me to go home.

• 14:58Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, now I want to go. Now I want you to pay for me to go home.

• 15:00Speaker 01

  Yeah, fly me home.

• 15:01Dax Shepard?

  Did you have any romantic liaisons on the?

• 15:04Speaker 02

  Well, no, unfortunately. I had a boyfriend at the time, not on the boat. So yeah, none of that. Well, actually, so my cousin, who I went on the boat with, met a guy on this boat. They, you know, were friends first and started dating and now they're married with three kids.

• 15:17Dax Shepard?

  Oh my goodness, so it was a me cute.

• 15:19Speaker 01

  Oh my god, do you think she was in the legs?

• 15:22Speaker 02

  Quite possibly. I wasn't with her, so I don't know. I don't remember, but she can clarify for me. They now live in Amsterdam and have three kids and they're happily married. So something great came out of it.

• 15:31Speaker 01

  Yay.

• 15:31Dax Shepard?

  Started adventurous and ended adventurous, living in Amsterdam.

• 15:34Speaker 01

  One more question. During the like legs and back and forth, was there puking again?

• 15:39Speaker 02

  Yes, some, but the extreme that if it had been calm and then this happened, I think it would have been a totally different situation. But I think at that point, we were all used to it.

• 15:48Dax Shepard?

  Everyone's already out of fluids at that point. They had puked themselves out.

• 15:53Dax Shepard?

  Well, Blair, that's a wild study abroad story. I did not expect we would have an oceanic portion of this.

• 15:59Speaker 02

  Yes, yes. I figured that somebody on my semester had to call in. So hopefully I did them justice.

• 16:05Speaker 01

  Right.

• 16:06Speaker 02

  I'm glad it was me that called in and got picked.

• 16:08Dax Shepard?

  Do you have any idea if they stayed in business, that organization?

• 16:11Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. They're still sailing. I get emails all the time about, you know, the next adventure. And, you know, when I was doing some Googling to get my facts straight for this, it said, spring 2027. So they're still ongoing. I know that after our semester, the host school changed around a bit because obviously there was a lot that went along with that legally and everything that happened. Yeah, it's still going. I get emails to go on reunion tours.

• 16:35Dax Shepard?

  Would you ever do this trip again?

• 16:36Speaker 02

  No, I don't even love a cruise anymore. We've gone on a cruise as a family and I do it to appease the children, but I'm all set.

• 16:43Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm with you. It's a little fishbowl-y, a little claustrophobic.

• 16:47Speaker 02

  Yes, very much so.

• 16:48Dax Shepard?

  Well, Blair is delightful to meet you.

• 16:50Speaker 01

  Thanks for chatting.

• 16:51Speaker 02

  So nice to meet you guys. Thank you for this.

• 16:53Dax Shepard?

  Take care.

• 16:53Speaker 02

  All right. Bye bye.

• 17:01Dax Shepard?

  We get support from our presenting sponsor, YouTube Premium. Now, you already know I'm a big YouTube person. It's incredible on its own, but Premium makes the whole experience feel enhanced. Like, you don't realize how much better it can get until you try it. The biggest game changer for me, background play. I love long, two hour deep dives. You name it, motorcycles, travel, cars.

• 17:26Speaker 01

  Cooking shows for me.

• 17:27Dax Shepard?

  Cooking. Listen, with Premium, you don't have to keep the screen open. So I can lock my phone, slide it into my pocket and listen to a podcast while I'm folding laundry or working out. It's also completely ad free, meaning when a narrator is building up to the climax of an insane story, there's zero interruption. And for travel, offline download saves the day. I love this one. Relying on airplane wifi can be a gamble, so I just download my favorite videos before takeoff. And with smart downloads, Premium will automatically download new videos from channels you actually follow without having to lift a finger. I'm covered if I forget to download a video I want to watch or even if there's no service. And the home run for me is that YouTube Premium remembers exactly where I left off

• 18:09Dax Shepard?

  and lets me continue watching on another device from right where I stopped. So I can start a video on my TV while brushing my teeth and pick it right back up on my phone on my morning walk. So yeah, YouTube was already great, but Premium supercharges it. If you like YouTube, you'll love Premium. Try YouTube Premium for two months free at youtube.com/premium. Trial eligibility varies. Terms apply. Cancel anytime. We get support from Superhuman. I'm someone who wants to do big, meaningful work, but the small stuff eats up my day before I even get to it. The endless emails, docs, scheduling, follow ups that pile up. By the time all that's cleared, there's no energy left for the ambitious stuff.

• 18:49Dax Shepard?

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  Start streamlining your workflows with Superhuman. Try today at superhuman.com. We get support from Instagram teen accounts. So we talk a lot on this show about how the world is different now than when we were growing up. And one of the biggest differences is obviously social media. And I think a lot of people wonder, okay, what's actually being done to make it safer for teenagers?

• 19:52Speaker 01

  Which is a fair question.

• 19:53Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, so Instagram has got something called teen accounts and they come with automatic protections built in by default. So anyone between 13 and 17 is automatically placed into this experience. They get age appropriate content settings, contact limits, so that by default, only people they're already connected to can message them. And time management tools, daily time limit reminders, and also sleep mode that mutes notifications from 10:00 PM to 7:00 AM.

• 20:19Speaker 01

  Sleep mode is genius.

• 20:21Dax Shepard?

  Right? And here's the thing, for anyone under 16, a parent has to give permission to change any of those settings to be less strict. The guardrails are on and Instagram keeps building new safety features to create age appropriate experiences for teens.

• 20:36Speaker 01

  I am really glad Instagram's helping to give parents peace of mind with teen accounts.

• 20:40Dax Shepard?

  Learn more about teen accounts and Instagram's ongoing work to protect teens online at instagram.com/teenaccounts. This episode is supported by Dell. Ready to upgrade your PC? The Dell Top Tech Event is here and you can skip the research because independent tech experts already did it. Dell has laptops, desktops and monitors that have been tested, reviewed and named a winner by the publishers you trust. So instead of spending hours researching, you get a shortlist that's already proven. Take the Dell XPS 13 laptop, built for those who want better.

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• 22:10Dax Shepard?

  Hello?

• 22:11Speaker 01

  Hi.

• 22:12Dax Shepard?

  What fake name would you like?

• 22:13Speaker 01

  Whatever name you want to use for me.

• 22:15Dax Shepard?

  You don't have a favorite name? Is there, um, like, let me just say, if I hadn't been named Dax, I think I would have wanted to have been Justin.

• 22:23Speaker 01

  You're obsessed with the name Justin.

• 22:25Dax Shepard?

  I am. Every Justin I've ever met was so cool. My cousin being the coolest of the group.

• 22:30Speaker 01

  That's nice. I wanted to be named Sky.

• 22:32Dax Shepard?

  Oh, like the Paw Patrol character?

• 22:34Speaker 01

  Well, it was pre Paw.

• 22:36Dax Shepard?

  Pre Paw.

• 22:37Speaker 01

  I think we should call you...

• 22:40Dax Shepard?

  It's dangerous, right?

• 22:41Speaker 01

  No.

• 22:42Speaker 02

  Is it too tough? Should I just randomly pick a name?

• 22:44Speaker 01

  No, I want to call her Rachel.

• 22:46Dax Shepard?

  Rachel.

• 22:46Speaker 02

  Oh, perfect.

• 22:47Dax Shepard?

  But there's a stress involved, Rachel, because we do this often. And if someone has some association with a name, like, let's just say their grandmother was named that. And then you're like, oh, my God, what do you think I look like a grandma?

• 22:58Speaker 01

  That's why I picked Rachel, because Rachel's one of my best friends.

• 23:01Speaker 02

  Oh, thank you.

• 23:03Dax Shepard?

  Wasn't she also a member of the Friends family?

• 23:05Speaker 01

  Yeah, I didn't even think about that. My goodness.

• 23:08Dax Shepard?

  Okay, great. So Rachel, are you allowed to tell us what part of the world you're in?

• 23:11Speaker 02

  Yes, I'm in the Midwest.

• 23:13Dax Shepard?

  Ah, wonderful. We love the Midwest.

• 23:15Speaker 02

  I'm just keeping my name anonymous because I couldn't get a hold of all the players in this story, you know, being respectful.

• 23:20Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, that's very ethical of you and very Midwestern of you. So Rachel, you had a study abroad experience. Please tell us all about it.

• 23:29Speaker 02

  So I'm going to take you in the Wayback Machine, truly, all the way back to May 2002. This exchange program between my university here in the US, Big Ten University, right? And university in Northern Italy. So this program ran from January to June. So long period of time, like, time for us to get to know all of Europe, all of Italy. And classes were Monday to Thursday. Friday, Saturday, Sunday, we got to go off, travel, do all the things, right? Spend all the money, be 20-year-olds in Europe without a care. So by the time May rolls around, we are on a super budget, because we're like, okay, we have pretty much spent all of our money gallivanting around Europe, but we've still got all these weekends. Where are we gonna go? So we figure, hey, let's take a slow train down to Naples, and then let's get on a ferry and go over to the island of Ischia. You know, if you

• 24:12Speaker 02

  guys are familiar with Ischia, most people go to Capri.

• 24:15Dax Shepard?

  Educate us on Ischia.

• 24:16Speaker 02

  It is an island in the same area, like Bay of Naples. They're famous for hot springs. So like, on the edge of the sea, you can actually boil an egg. Most people like to sit where the waters mix.

• 24:26Dax Shepard?

  Wow.

• 24:27Speaker 02

  So we're like, okay, slow train, cheap, ferry cheap, free hot springs, we're in.

• 24:32Dax Shepard?

  Can I ask you a really quick question? It's an Amanda Knox question. She was in Northern Italy. No? Is that where she was at?

• 24:39Speaker 01

  I don't remember what part it was.

• 24:40Dax Shepard?

  I'm just wondering if you were in the same area, or if when that case came about, it rung particularly poignant to you, having done a study abroad there?

• 24:48Speaker 01

  What year was that?

• 24:49Dax Shepard?

  After.

• 24:49Speaker 03

  2007 in Pergia, Italy.

• 24:53Dax Shepard?

  Okay, so nothing. When that was happening, you weren't like, oh, that could have been me?

• 24:56Speaker 02

  No, I definitely thought about it. I was like, ooh, like, younger woman. This story also kind of leads a little bit, right, into some concerns about that.

• 25:04Dax Shepard?

  Okay, okay.

• 25:05Speaker 02

  We'll tell the story, and then we'll figure out the parallels.

• 25:07Dax Shepard?

  Okay.

• 25:09Speaker 02

  So we go down to Ischia, we get to a hostel. The hostel owner's like, hey, good news, it's not really touristy season. So all five of you can go in one big room, because there's me and four friends, right, that are also there from the same university. You can go in one room together, be in all the bunk beds, have a great time. Super. So we go out during the day, we see all the hot springs. We come back, and like, Italian time, like, 8:39, we're like, we should get dinner. So we go down to the guy at the front desk of the hostel. We're like, hey, we need a restaurant recommendation. No cell phones, no internet, no Google, no Yelp. He says, well, the restaurant across the street is actually pretty good. And we're like, that's a restaurant? It doesn't look like a restaurant. And he's like, yeah, it's a restaurant. It's got a super old stone building, no windows, two giant wooden doors. So we're like, all right, dude says it's a restaurant, we'll

• 25:53Speaker 02

  believe him, we'll go over. Let's go over, open the giant wooden doors, and it is, it's a restaurant on the inside. There's only one other party in there, so not a big deal. Server comes over, seats us, all good. So we order a pasta, and again, we're on a big budget. We order one house liter of wine. It's like four or five euro. It's all we can afford. As we're eating, suddenly the server brings over another house liter of wine, right? Comes in a little pitcher. And we're like, excuse me, sir. And our Italian's pretty good at this point. We're like, so sorry if you misunderstood. We didn't order that. Actually, we can't afford it, right? Like, we're straight up telling him, like, we can't have the wine. He's like, it's okay, it's okay. It's from that table.

• 26:30Speaker 01

  Ooh.

• 26:30Speaker 02

  Over there. So we look over, and there's a long table lined with men on both sides. And one guy's sitting at the head of the table.

• 26:39Speaker 01

  Sorry, and is it all girls?

• 26:41Speaker 02

  Five girls, all 20-year-old girls, and a table full of men.

• 26:44Dax Shepard?

  Aging of the men. Are they in their 40s? What are we talking?

• 26:47Speaker 02

  I'm gonna guess 35 to 60.

• 26:51Dax Shepard?

  Okay, nice mix of men.

• 26:54Speaker 02

  Nice mix of men. Exactly. That's what we said. Look at that nice mix of men. So as we're eating, more and more pitchers of wine appear, like, liter after liter of wine. I'm not really drinking that much, I'm not a big drinker, but my friends are pretty inebriated. One of them says, we should go say thank you to the table of people that have been sending us wine. That's what you do, right? Like, a bunch of 20-year-old women, you're like, let's go to the strange men that have been sending us booze. So we go over there. They're like, hey, sit down with us, like, eat with us. So nice to meet you. Let's introduce ourselves. So we're like, sure. So we sit down, they've got tons of food, tons of alcohol. We go around, we do introductions. They introduce us to the man at the head of the table. They said, he doesn't need a name, you just need to know that his name is the Papa Pertutti, which means the father for everyone.

• 27:39Dax Shepard?

  Okay, so this is a mafioso situation.

• 27:42Speaker 01

  The father for everyone.

• 27:45Dax Shepard?

  The godfather.

• 27:46Speaker 02

  20-year-olds know nothing about mafia, right? Like, Sopranos may or may not be out. We can't afford HBO. It's not happening at that day. We're like, oh, nice, there's a father figure for the neighborhood, right? That's so sweet. So, things are taking hours, we're having a great time. Eventually, I realized two things. One, no one else has come in the restaurant. Two, suddenly, there's really loud music, like, dance music playing.

• 28:10Dax Shepard?

  Oh.

• 28:10Speaker 02

  All of the kitchen staff has come out, all of the waitstaff, they all want to start a dance party with us.

• 28:15Speaker 01

  What?

• 28:16Speaker 02

  They're like, everyone get up, dance. Everybody's, except for me, is, you know, pretty three sheets to the wind. So they're like, yeah, like, get up. They bring over tables. Everyone dance on the tables. My friends are on the tables, dancing.

• 28:27Dax Shepard?

  Oh, my lord.

• 28:28Speaker 02

  There's a moment where I'm like, feels like it might not be the right thing for us to be doing. So I'm in my head, and I'm like, I need to touch grass for a minute. I need to go outside, need to get a deep breath. I need to figure out, like, should I be grabbing my friends out of here? Is this a danger moment, right?

• 28:44Speaker 01

  You are so me. We should have named you Monica, not Rachel.

• 28:47Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, maybe we have to retrofit the name.

• 28:49Speaker 02

  So I go over to the big wooden doors, and the big wooden doors, like, the handle is one of those big iron rings, right? Like a bull nose. You can picture it on the old door. So I grab the ring, and I go to pull it. It doesn't move.

• 29:01Speaker 01

  Oh, no.

• 29:02Dax Shepard?

  Oh, Jesus.

• 29:02Speaker 02

  And I'm like, oh, God, okay. So maybe it just has to turn, right? Like, maybe I'm just a dumb-dumb, old door. So I turn the knob, nothing again. The door is locked. And it's locked from the inside, obviously, because no one's been outside. So I'm like, okay, I have to figure this out now. Now panic alarm. So I see a server actually doing restaurante stuff. And I was like, hey, sir, I don't feel very well. I think I need to go outside. And he just ignored me. I know my Italian's good. He's ignoring me, he's doing stuff. So I finally, I'm like, I'm gonna be sick, like, right now. And he was like, oh, okay, hold on. So he grabs me, walks me quickly over to the door, goes in his pocket, pulls out keys.

• 29:41Speaker 01

  Oh, my God.

• 29:42Speaker 02

  So either he was the right person, though they all had keys, I don't know, opens the door, shoves me out, slams the door shut. So now, I have lost all visibility to my friends. So I'm like, all right, they can't see me either. I'm gonna high-tail it over to the hostel and try to get some help. So I run across the street to our hostel, and I start screaming, like, in Italian, as I'm running in, like, I need help, I need help. My friends I was with need help. And the guy at the front desk is like, oh, my God, what do we need to do? I'm like, I think you need to call the police. So he picks up the phone, he starts dialing, and he says, where are your friends? Right? Like, where do they need help? And I'm like, they're in the restaurant. And he stops dialing. And he looks me in the eyes, and he says, which restaurant? And I said, the restaurant

• 30:24Speaker 02

  across the street. And he puts the phone down.

• 30:28Speaker 01

  No, no, no, no, no.

• 30:29Speaker 02

  And he says, I can't call the police. And I was like, screaming in Italian, like, okay, okay, like, why? Why? Like, why can't you call the police? And he goes, well, they own the police.

• 30:40Speaker 01

  Are you kidding? This is horrifying.

• 30:43Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 30:44Speaker 01

  Oh, my God.

• 30:46Speaker 02

  You were right, most likely, right? Like, this is some type of nefarious family or group. So I did what any other 20-year-old, you know, American would do at the time. I called my boyfriend back in the US to talk about it.

• 30:58Speaker 01

  Call the, call the police at home. Have them help.

• 31:03Speaker 02

  I actually married this man. So he was, he was like, oh, you're gonna tell the restaurant story on it. So I called him, and I'm telling him things like, I think we need to call the embassy. He's like, I don't know that we're there. I also don't know how I would do that. You know, he's like 21 years old, back in the US.

• 31:19Speaker 01

  This is good thinking on your part.

• 31:21Speaker 02

  I'm freaked out. I'm like, these are my friends. I don't know what's happening to them. So I was on the phone with him for about, probably, two hours or so. When I talked to him, it's like, I think it was two hours.

• 31:30Dax Shepard?

  That's pricey.

• 31:31Speaker 02

  Well, yeah.

• 31:32Dax Shepard?

  Yeah.

• 31:32Speaker 02

  I bought cheap phone cards at the train station. Let me tell you, I knew how to get the cheap stuff, so I could call him. But still, still, more than another liter of wine, which I probably should have just bought and avoided this whole situation, right? So, all of the sudden, the door bursts open, and my friends come running in, and they are distressed. You can tell, like, they are sweating, and they are freaking out. And I'm like, how did you get out? Oh, my God, I've been sitting here freaking out, but I didn't want to go back to the restaurant. And then there's nobody here to tell the story, you know, like, what's happening? And they're like, we were almost taken to Switzerland. They said, all the men there were talking about, yeah, they have wives and kids, but there were secret tunnels, and they were gonna bring them to Switzerland. Now, remember, we're not in Northern Italy anymore. Like, we're down the coast now. So

• 32:14Speaker 02

  Switzerland's not down the block. They're gonna take them to Switzerland, they've got homes there, they're gonna have great trips. And they're like, eventually, we convinced them we had to go back to school on Monday. And they let us go.

• 32:25Dax Shepard?

  Okay, good. So they were in the business of trying to buy their way into some action and woo, but they weren't into assault, as it turns out?

• 32:34Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 32:35Speaker 01

  In that case, yeah.

• 32:36Dax Shepard?

  Thank goodness.

• 32:37Speaker 02

  So we went back to the hostel room, and those that needed to sleep it off, slept it off. I stayed up. I was like, freaked out, right? I'm like, this is right across the street. I don't know who's still there. At first light, I was like, everybody get up. We are getting off this island, and we are never going to come back.

• 32:53Speaker 01

  Forget boiling an egg in the water. Who cares?

• 32:57Speaker 02

  I have been to Italy, thankfully, many times since. Never once have I gone back to Ischia. Never once that I have wanted to go back to Ischia.

• 33:05Dax Shepard?

  Well, it was lovely meeting you.

• 33:06Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 33:07Speaker 02

  Lovely to meet you, too. Great to chat with you. Have a great day.

• 33:09Dax Shepard?

  I take care.

• 33:09Speaker 02

  Okay, bye.

• 33:12Speaker 02

  Hello?

• 33:12Dax Shepard?

  Hello.

• 33:13Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 33:13Dax Shepard?

  Hello.

• 33:14Speaker 01

  Oh, for you were a ghost for a second.

• 33:16Dax Shepard?

  That guy was scary.

• 33:19Speaker 01

  Can we give you a fake name or is she a real?

• 33:21Dax Shepard?

  She's Nina. What did you wanna call her?

• 33:22Speaker 01

  What'd you think?

• 33:23Dax Shepard?

  Oh, oh, oh, oh. One, two, three.

• 33:26Speaker 01

  Olivia.

• 33:28Speaker 04

  Really?

• 33:30Speaker 01

  You look like Olivia Munn.

• 33:31Dax Shepard?

  Yeah.

• 33:32Speaker 04

  I've gotten that before, actually.

• 33:34Speaker 01

  Yes, you look a lot like her.

• 33:35Dax Shepard?

  Enough so that you could be her. Right now, tricky.

• 33:39Speaker 01

  Olivia.

• 33:41Dax Shepard?

  Nina, where are you?

• 33:43Speaker 04

  I'm in Santa Monica.

• 33:44Dax Shepard?

  Oh, my goodness. A stone's throw.

• 33:46Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 33:46Dax Shepard?

  In a six hour drive.

• 33:47Speaker 04

  Also, Dax, I have to say, I just moved, but my apartment before this was on 14th and Santa Monica Boulevard.

• 33:53Dax Shepard?

  No.

• 33:54Speaker 01

  That's where you lived?

• 33:55Dax Shepard?

  I lived at Euclid, which is 13th in Santa. Did you live between Santa Monica and Colorado or Santa Monica and Broadway?

• 34:01Speaker 04

  Santa Monica and Arizona.

• 34:04Dax Shepard?

  Oh, right, Arizona. So you were north, you were one block nicer.

• 34:07Speaker 04

  Exactly.

• 34:08Dax Shepard?

  Where are you from, though?

• 34:09Speaker 04

  I'm from Rhode Island.

• 34:10Dax Shepard?

  Oh, Rhode Island.

• 34:12Speaker 04

  So Monica respectfully disagrees with the little brother.

• 34:16Speaker 01

  Yeah, I thought that might come up.

• 34:18Speaker 04

  I mean, I think it's fair enough, but it's small but mighty.

• 34:22Speaker 01

  Yeah, of course. A lot of little brothers are.

• 34:24Dax Shepard?

  I've yet to hear who has big brother energy. Monica's only saying everywhere's got little brother energy.

• 34:29Speaker 01

  That's not true.

• 34:30Dax Shepard?

  I think only New York City has big brother energy. And what else? Los Angeles?

• 34:34Speaker 01

  California has big brother energy. New York has big brother energy. No, other places do too. I think Georgia has big brother energy.

• 34:43Dax Shepard?

  Oh, I'm a shocker. Yeah, everywhere you live has big brother energy.

• 34:47Speaker 01

  I think a lot of places in the South have big brother energy. I don't think many of those have little brother energy. Okay, I'll go through each. I'm just kidding.

• 34:57Speaker 04

  The more that I think about it, I love little brothers. They always come out a little bit better. They get to learn from the big ones.

• 35:02Dax Shepard?

  That's very nice of you to say.

• 35:03Speaker 04

  They mature earlier, too. They sometimes steal the girls from the older brothers. I know some stories.

• 35:09Dax Shepard?

  There's a little brother present, you know?

• 35:11Speaker 01

  I know. Have you ever stolen a girlfriend from your brother?

• 35:14Dax Shepard?

  That's none of your business, or his.

• 35:16Speaker 01

  Exclusive.

• 35:19Dax Shepard?

  Okay, Nina, you have a steady abroad story.

• 35:22Speaker 04

  I do have a steady abroad story. Okay, so it was December 2016 and I was studying abroad in Barcelona, best city ever. And my friends and I decided to do a weekend in Stockholm. One of my girlfriends had friends there and so we were planning to stay with one of them and his family. So the first day we got there and we hung out, oh, we'll call this guy James, the one who was hosting. We were hanging out with James and his friends. And so we went to his friend Sam's house. And from the start, everything was super fun. Like, we were at Sam's family's house. His parents were amazing, so warm, so welcoming. Sam was awesome, so kind. He had this adorable relationship with his little sister and just great vibes, family oriented person. We're like, cool, like, this is a great day.

• 36:07Speaker 04

  So later that night, the plan was to go out to the club with James and his friends, including Sam. So we were about a van of like five to eight kids. And initially, we just wanted to go straight to the club, but at the last minute, Sam insisted at stopping at this house party. Most of us didn't want to go. We didn't know anyone there. We didn't know where it was. We just were like, no, like, what's the point of going? Let's just get to the club. But he just somehow overruled us. Like, our opinion did not matter. He had his, like, set on his party. The party itself was, like, pretty boring, pretty forgettable. We were only there for maybe like 15 or 20 minutes until Sam abruptly decided it was too late. At this point, something about him felt different, like his demeanor had totally shifted.

• 36:51Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, I'm already, I'm like, Sam just needed to stop at a house to get drugs before we go to the nightclub, is what it feels like. Why do we need to do a pit stop here if not to get something? But I'll stay out of it.

• 37:00Speaker 04

  Okay, I was wondering when you might jump in, but here we go.

• 37:09Dax Shepard?

  We get support from our sponsor, Lilly. For adults with obesity or with excess weight and weight-related medical problems, it's time to find out about Foundo or for Glee Ron. Foundo is a once daily prescription GLP-1 medicine used with a reduced calorie diet and increased physical activity to help adults with obesity or some adults with overweight who also have weight-related medical problems to lose excess body weight and keep the weight off.

• 37:35Speaker 05

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• 38:14Speaker 05

  Once daily Foundo is available by prescription only in 0.8 milligram, 2.5 milligram, 5.5 milligram, 9 milligram, 14.5 milligram, and 17.2 milligram tablets. Learn more at foundo.lilly.com or call 1-800-LILY-RX. Now is perfect to talk to your doctor about Foundo.

• 38:32Dax Shepard?

  This episode is supported by Helix.

• 38:36Speaker 01

  Dax, is there anything better than crawling into a perfect bed on a cold fall night? Candlelit, hoodie on, maybe even some rain outside. The dream.

• 38:46Dax Shepard?

  That's the dream. You just described one of my ideal fall nights.

• 38:51Speaker 01

  I know. And thanks to Helix, my bed actually lives up to the vibe. All I had to do was take the Helix Sleep Quiz and within two minutes, they matched me to a mattress built for exactly how I sleep. I have a midnight mattress. It also has cooling technology. Which I really.

• 39:06Dax Shepard?

  Increasingly so.

• 39:08Speaker 01

  I need it. I have to have it. And I heard that you're supposed to sleep at a cold temp for optimal sleep. It's very, very helpful.

• 39:18Dax Shepard?

  She is not wrong. I have one too, and it's been such a game changer for sleep. And I love that they make it so easy. Free shipping right to your door. And with their happy with Helix guarantee, you'll get a full 365 nights to try it. A whole year to live in that cozy. They've got over 20 mattress models, so no matter how you sleep, they've got one for you.

• 39:38Speaker 01

  And it's not just us saying it. Helix has been named the most awarded mattress brand by Forbes, Wired, and more. You gotta try it for yourself.

• 39:45Dax Shepard?

  Go to helixsleep.com/armchair for 20% off site wide. That's helixsleep.com/armchair for 20% off site wide. Helixsleep.com/armchair. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. If you've thought about trying therapy with our long-term partner, BetterHelp, insurance options may now be available nationwide with an average copay for eligible members of just $23 per session. October 10th is World Mental Health Day, but you don't need a day on the calendar to give yourself permission to talk to someone. I've been in therapy for a long time and the stuff rattling around in my head always just quiets down the second I say it out loud.

• 40:25Dax Shepard?

  And it doesn't have to be some big life crisis. Maybe it's a work thing that's taking up too much space or hard relationship moment, or just a feeling that something's off. That's enough. That's worth talking about.

• 40:36Speaker 01

  You know, I love therapy more than anything. Gets me through. Often I'll want to cancel because I'm like, I don't really have anything to talk about. And then I'll go and I have some major revelation.

• 40:47Dax Shepard?

  You know, I was just talking to a friend who has just started it. And I said, one of the most powerful elements of it is just hearing yourself say out loud the thing that's been ruminating in your head and how different it sounds once it's out into the world. You gain perspective immediately just by hearing yourself say it.

• 41:02Speaker 01

  Yeah, you do.

• 41:03Dax Shepard?

  If you've been waiting to start therapy, BetterHelp works with more than 125 health plan networks and eligible members have an average copay of just $23 per session with insurance. Don't have insurance or live outside the US? You can still get 10% off your first month. Do yourself a favor and just try it. Future you will be grateful. Visit betterhelp.com/dax to explore your payment options. That's better H E L P dot com slash Dax.

• 41:39Speaker 04

  So he was, yeah, suddenly like tense and like distant and like cold and like also felt like he was somehow in charge of us. Like, nope, like, we're going, we're leaving now, let's go. Just like this eerie energy. So we did though, we made it to the club. We all had a good time, kind of lost sight of Sam. Like, my girlfriends and I were just dancing. Eventually, we were ready to leave and our host, James, had already left. So we held a talkie of our own and we're ready to go home. We were tired. And then suddenly, like, Sam reappears and said he was gonna join our talkie home and like make a stop.

• 42:13Speaker 01

  He loves to stop.

• 42:14Dax Shepard?

  He loves pit stops.

• 42:15Speaker 04

  But the talkies were like incredibly expensive for some reason. I don't know if that's still like came from Stockholm, but they're really expensive. We were tired. We were already like kind of freaked out by this guy and just wanted to get home. So we were like, hey, just get one of your, on your own. We're gonna take this one. We're three girls. So we got in the car and started to pull away and then Sam just like jumps in the front seat. And we're like, no, what? Like, please, can we get out of the car? Like, we're just tired. Like, you just want to go home. And he just like ignored us, as though like he couldn't hear us, as though we didn't exist. And then he said something to the driver in Swedish that we couldn't understand. We were like a little panicked, but we were like, what's going on? Like, where are we going? But we're like, why is it getting so intense and secretive and controlling? And so we go for the ride and we're still hoping that either it's gonna be like a short stop or maybe not so far away.

• 42:58Speaker 04

  We also asked the driver, like, can you take us home first? Not sure what he can understand. But he and Sam, again, completely ignorant. So it was as though we were like ghosts in the car. They're like, hello, like, what's going on? And so when we started getting a little bit louder and he's like, hello, like, please, at least where are we going? Sam just goes.

• 43:16Speaker 01

  Put his hand up.

• 43:17Speaker 04

  With his hand, like, to silence us. And then just goes like, shut up.

• 43:20Dax Shepard?

  Oh, wow. Okay.

• 43:21Speaker 04

  He like gestured the driver to also like not respond to us. And so now we're getting like really uncomfortable. What we do do is call one of James' friends who speaks Swedish, who's awake. And we're like, here, like, talk to the driver for us. And so we tell him what's going on and he's like immediately like furious. He's like, give me the driver right now. Hand their phone to the driver. Driver talks for a second, hangs up. Nothing changes. Still no response. They're still going the wrong way. And again, they're both just like ignoring us. So for the next 20 or so minutes, we're just like quiet, obviously imagining pretty bad outcomes. Until we pull into this like dark, empty parking lot and Sam like jumped out, tells us to stay put and disappears.

• 44:02Speaker 04

  So we're just sitting there in the cab in silence. The driver starts moving the car like forward and backward abruptly, just jolting it forward, back, forward, back. And we're just like, what? We're just like jolting. We're like, what? This is like the creepiest, like eeriest, most random thing ever. And then he just like creepily locks.

• 44:21Speaker 01

  Ew.

• 44:23Speaker 04

  He like locks the car door. And we're like, no, no, no. Like, we're not gonna be locked in this car door. We're like, sir, please unlock the car door. And then he just starts locking and unlocking, locking and unlocking, like the little lock thing just going up and down, up and down. And we're like. Dude, what is going on? And he again just starts kind of like laughing like, what? Like, are you just trying to scare us? Or like, what is this? Sam returns, gets back in the car without a word and just like told the driver to leave. And continued to ignore us on the whole way home. Like, where were we? Where are we going? Until eventually they do drop us off. So we do make it home and we run inside. We're like, oh, that was weird. Go to bed.

• 45:05Speaker 04

  And then in the morning, we like wake up and we tell James's mom like about our night. We're like, this is what happened? Like, how weird is this? And we told her like the area that we were brought to. And her face just goes kind of pale and like freaked out. And she's just like, I cannot believe that you guys were brought to that area. That's the most crime ridden part of Stockholm. We call it the murder capital. Guns are pulled out all the time. Like, we're just so happy that you're okay. And then she's like, that boy Sam, who is a true close friend, is like, never allowed in my house ever again. And so we don't have too many answers to what happened, except the last weird part of that is like the next day or so,

• 45:44Speaker 04

  he starts messaging us on Facebook and starts harassing us and demanding that we pay for the drinks from the night before. And we're like, no, dude. Wow.

• 45:53Dax Shepard?

  I think Sam was an addict. I think Sam had an addiction. Yeah, I think he needed to stop at the first house to get some. Then he was really irritable because he needed more by the time he got out of the club.

• 46:03Speaker 01

  Get in his own cab?

• 46:04Speaker 04

  We don't know.

• 46:05Dax Shepard?

  Cause he probably is broke from being an addict and didn't have any money to pay for a cab. I'm guessing.

• 46:11Speaker 04

  I think the weirdest part, because we were like, no, we're not paying for these drinks. Like, we just paid a couple hundred bucks for this terrifying taxi ride.

• 46:18Dax Shepard?

  Yeah.

• 46:18Speaker 04

  And then he just like got super dark, like started calling us names, using misogynistic slurs, all these anti Semitic.

• 46:25Speaker 01

  Oh, my God.

• 46:27Speaker 04

  Stuff that was just terrifying. We blocked him.

• 46:30Dax Shepard?

  What did James have to say about his friend Sam? Did he have any explanation?

• 46:33Speaker 04

  We didn't get any answers. James was just freaked out. He was like, this is crazy. Like, this guy's not my friend anymore. Made that pretty clear, but we had the same conclusion. I mean, it's more like upon reflection later, like, okay, that's definitely drug related. But I think the creepiest part or like the saddest part was just seeing him earlier in the day and how he like transformed beyond the lies just into this like.

• 46:55Dax Shepard?

  Gargoyle.

• 46:56Speaker 01

  Monster.

• 46:57Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, drug monster.

• 46:59Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 47:00Speaker 01

  Ugh, so scary.

• 47:02Dax Shepard?

  Yeah.

• 47:02Speaker 01

  And I wonder what he told the cab driver? Like, maybe he would pay him extra? Like, what did he tell him to make him go along with this?

• 47:10Dax Shepard?

  Good question. Also, the cab driver is gonna know what part of town he's asking to go to. So why is he willing to go there? Maybe he wanted a little something, something. Lest this not reflect on Stockholm as a city. What a beautiful place.

• 47:25Speaker 04

  Beautiful. Other than that, it was amazing. It was Christmas time. There's always adorable Christmas markets.

• 47:31Speaker 01

  Cute.

• 47:32Dax Shepard?

  Do you fly or take a train there from Barcelona?

• 47:35Speaker 04

  We flew, we flew everywhere. We made like lots of different stops, went to like ten or so countries. I think train sounds so much more charming. We just didn't have the time. We were on student schedule. We were like 48 hour trips.

• 47:46Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 47:46Dax Shepard?

  Right.

• 47:47Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 47:47Dax Shepard?

  Wowzers.

• 47:48Speaker 01

  Thanks for sharing. I'm glad you made it out of there. Could have been a horrible ending.

• 47:52Speaker 04

  Thank you both so much.

• 47:53Dax Shepard?

  Take care.

• 47:54Speaker 04

  Have a good rest of your day.

• 47:55Dax Shepard?

  Bye.

• 47:55Speaker 04

  Bye bye.

• 47:57Speaker 06

  Hey, guys.

• 47:58Speaker 01

  Hi.

• 47:59Dax Shepard?

  Is this Noah?

• 48:00Speaker 06

  This is Noah. How are you?

• 48:01Speaker 01

  We're good.

• 48:02Dax Shepard?

  Noah, you have a robust head of hair. Congratulations.

• 48:06Speaker 06

  It's a real accomplishment.

• 48:08Speaker 01

  It is.

• 48:08Dax Shepard?

  It is, it is. As someone who's fighting hourly to keep mine, it is, it's impressive.

• 48:14Speaker 06

  I think we're in the same boat.

• 48:15Dax Shepard?

  Okay. And it's a gorgeous swoop, too.

• 48:18Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's got a good shape.

• 48:19Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, it's nice.

• 48:20Speaker 06

  Thank you. That's kind of me to say, I appreciate it.

• 48:23Dax Shepard?

  Noah, where are you?

• 48:24Speaker 06

  I'm in a suburb of Boston.

• 48:25Dax Shepard?

  Okay, wonderful. Please let us in on your study abroad.

• 48:30Speaker 06

  I'm just a shade younger than you, Dex. This story takes place in February of 1994.

• 48:36Dax Shepard?

  Okay, great. So this is your graduation year, maybe?

• 48:38Speaker 06

  Uh, the year before, so I was a junior.

• 48:40Dax Shepard?

  So you are 93, like me?

• 48:42Speaker 06

  Yes.

• 48:43Dax Shepard?

  Okay, okay. Oh, no, you were a junior in 94.

• 48:45Speaker 06

  I'm 95.

• 48:46Dax Shepard?

  95, okay, okay, okay.

• 48:48Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 48:48Dax Shepard?

  Okay.

• 48:49Speaker 06

  So I studied the Russian language.

• 48:52Dax Shepard?

  Sure.

• 48:53Speaker 06

  When I was in high school. I had a wonderful Russian teacher who happened to have a relationship with a school in northern Russia, eight hours by train north of Moscow. This small to midsize industrial city called Petrosovodsk, or PZ is what we call it.

• 49:07Speaker 01

  The way you said it was great.

• 49:08Dax Shepard?

  You nailed it. Does this put you in the Arctic Circle? Are you that far north?

• 49:12Speaker 06

  South of Finland. And I went there in the wintertime. It was pretty cold. Our exchange program, it was reciprocal. So I had a student come and stay with us in the first semester of the year. And then I went and stayed with them the second semester of the year. So by the time I got there, me and this guy were already butts.

• 49:32Speaker 01

  Fine.

• 49:32Dax Shepard?

  Great. And really quick, when he was at your house, we're only five years out of the wall falling at this point, right? So this is like a probably a new program. And are you speaking to each other in Russian when you're at your house or English?

• 49:45Speaker 06

  No, my Russian was so much poorer than his English.

• 49:49Dax Shepard?

  Okay.

• 49:50Speaker 06

  His English was great.

• 49:51Dax Shepard?

  Okay, okay, sure.

• 49:52Speaker 06

  And it was his ambition at the time to become a doctor. His father was a doctor, so he was a dialed in student. I go to Russia in February of 1994 and I live with his family. His father is a neurosurgeon.

• 50:08Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 50:09Speaker 06

  And this is gonna pique your interest. Monica, I want to tell you something right up front. There's gonna be a thing or two about this story that's probably gonna be a little bit bothersome.

• 50:16Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 50:17Dax Shepard?

  Yeah.

• 50:17Speaker 06

  But I'm gonna tell it anyway.

• 50:18Speaker 01

  Don't tell me yet, but I'm just wondering if that means like sexually or if that means like maggots?

• 50:23Dax Shepard?

  Oh, mm, yeah.

• 50:24Speaker 01

  But we're gonna find out.

• 50:25Dax Shepard?

  Or the wrong college?

• 50:26Speaker 06

  Neither of those things.

• 50:27Speaker 01

  Oh, interesting, okay.

• 50:29Speaker 06

  The dad is a neurosurgeon who makes $2,000 a year.

• 50:32Dax Shepard?

  $2,000 a year?

• 50:33Speaker 01

  Oh, my.

• 50:34Speaker 06

  A year.

• 50:34Speaker 01

  God.

• 50:35Dax Shepard?

  Oh, my goodness.

• 50:36Speaker 06

  And the mom is a nurse who makes less than that. So it's rough. Inflation is rampant and we lived in a seventh floor walk up tenement, one bedroom. They were a four person family and I was there too.

• 50:47Dax Shepard?

  So relative though to other people, were they like living high on the hog? Was that good relative to the non-neurosurgeons? Okay.

• 50:55Speaker 06

  Think like projects. I mean, medical professionals, I think at that time in that country were paid very poorly. There was no communal electricity in the building. Seventh floor walk up, the elevator was broken. Parents slept on a fold out couch in the apartment. And my friend and I stayed in the bedroom. All that is to say, things were pretty economically rough at the time.

• 51:17Dax Shepard?

  Yeah.

• 51:17Speaker 06

  So we ended up having a career day. I tended to hang out with the Russian students. I bonded with them more than my American counterparts who were there with me at the time. But this city, PZ, hadn't had a lot of American tourists. So they were like really happy to have us there.

• 51:33Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, sure, it's exciting.

• 51:35Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 51:35Dax Shepard?

  You're from the movies at that point.

• 51:37Speaker 06

  Kind of, yeah. And so I go to career day and my host dad sort of shuffles us off. I went there with another one of my fellow American students. And he sort of says, younger surgical staff, take care of these guys. Show them the ropes. Okay, so Monica, sorry, but things are gonna get a little bit sideways right now.

• 51:56Speaker 06

  We get a tour of this place and the first patient they take us to see is a woman and they've cut out half of her brain.

• 52:05Dax Shepard?

  Oh, okay. Do you get an explanation for why they did that?

• 52:10Speaker 06

  Not really. She had a terminal brain injury and the gnarly thing about this is that they didn't put like a prosthetic back into her head. They just took the flap of skin and sewed it back onto her head. So she was pretty much missing this.

• 52:26Speaker 01

  Ah, and was it squishy?

• 52:28Speaker 06

  No, I didn't touch it.

• 52:31Dax Shepard?

  But presumably it was sunken in and misshapen, I imagine, right?

• 52:36Speaker 01

  Did it look like, like if you touched it, it would be squishy?

• 52:40Speaker 06

  I wouldn't imagine that it might be a little squishy.

• 52:42Dax Shepard?

  And it was enormously dented, I'm guessing?

• 52:44Speaker 06

  Oh, yeah. It was like they took this entire quarter of her head out. So that was a little jarring.

• 52:49Dax Shepard?

  Yeah. Was she conscious? Like, was it a successful operation?

• 52:53Speaker 06

  She was in a vegetative state. The next patient they take us to see, his name is Ivan. And the reason that I remember that is because, as you're probably well aware, there's a significant booze culture in Russia. And this guy, I think, was a bit of a bruiser at the bars.

• 53:11Dax Shepard?

  Sure, sure, sure.

• 53:12Speaker 06

  So he got into a fight and somebody hit him in the head with a hammer a couple of times.

• 53:17Dax Shepard?

  Oh, yeah, wow.

• 53:19Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah, I'm remembering now that he's a neurosurgeon. So all of these are gonna be horrible, horrible head stuff.

• 53:26Speaker 06

  The surgical staff takes me over to see Ivan and Ivan's pretty banged up. He's being held to the bed by bed sheets. They tied him down. They don't have formal restraints and they have a bed sheet wrapped around his head, which is bloody because he got hit in the head with a hammer.

• 53:38Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, yeah. It's also the kind of bar where people have hammers at their disposal. We should have.

• 53:44Speaker 06

  I guess it was a hammer bar.

• 53:47Speaker 06

  But they keep saying, Ivan, kaktab yazavut, which means, what's your name? And he said, which means, I don't know. And so they were just fascinated by the fact that this guy couldn't remember his name. And as soon as my American counterpart saw this guy, she fainted.

• 54:02Dax Shepard?

  Oh.

• 54:03Speaker 06

  Straight to the ground.

• 54:04Dax Shepard?

  Like a weak American, yeah.

• 54:07Speaker 01

  Zero constitution.

• 54:08Speaker 06

  I was kind of nervous too, but I just kept talking my way through it.

• 54:11Dax Shepard?

  Sure, nervously.

• 54:13Speaker 01

  I mean, you're in high school, like, this is a lot.

• 54:16Dax Shepard?

  It's extreme. Well, also, you've gone everywhere else is in Spain and Italy eating spaghetti. And you're in a tundra.

• 54:24Speaker 01

  God, where people are making $2,000 a year.

• 54:29Dax Shepard?

  You guys have already self-selected. You're a specific group.

• 54:31Speaker 06

  I had a wonderful time.

• 54:33Dax Shepard?

  Sure, I can.

• 54:33Speaker 06

  Couldn't have been kind.

• 54:34Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, I can tell you're built for it.

• 54:36Speaker 06

  A few days after that, we go to a discotheque. I was closer with the Russian kids than I was to the American kids. So we're partying at this discotheque. It's very, as is the case with many discotheques, very dark, very loud, lot going on.

• 54:49Dax Shepard?

  You're allowed to drink at that age there, I presume?

• 54:51Speaker 06

  Uh, nobody really noticed.

• 54:53Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 54:54Speaker 01

  They have bigger things to deal with.

• 54:57Speaker 06

  One of our friends hasn't shown up yet and we're looking for Sergey. He's not there yet. About 30 minutes after we arrive, he enters the discotheque, but he sort of lurches in and he's got his hand on his side.

• 55:10Speaker 01

  Uh oh.

• 55:11Speaker 06

  At this time in Russia, the Russian mob is everywhere. And so he comes over to us and we don't really notice, we're dancing, having fun. He says, they got me. Maybe the rest of the Russian kids who I was with already knew that he did this kind of thing, but we're all like, ah, whatever. Sergey chill out, just party with us, hang out. And he just know they got me. And he pulls his hand away from his side and it's red.

• 55:34Dax Shepard?

  Your first thought is hammer attack.

• 55:36Speaker 01

  I know about this.

• 55:40Dax Shepard?

  They got you with the sharp end of the hammer.

• 55:41Speaker 06

  So immediately I'm like, whoa, hang on a second. We sort of hit pause on everything with our whole group of friends there. And we're like, Sergey, what's going on? What happened? He worked part-time for the Russian mafia in the city and he mugged people and gave a portion of the proceeds to the mob every week and got to keep part for himself. And apparently either the week prior or maybe this week, he had forgotten to pay them. So they caught him outside of the disco and shanked him in the side.

• 56:10Dax Shepard?

  Okay, so they've stabbed him. He's dealing with a stab wound.

• 56:13Speaker 01

  And he's in high school.

• 56:14Speaker 06

  He's a 16-year-old boy.

• 56:16Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 56:16Dax Shepard?

  Okay. But he's tougher than most 30-year-old American men, I'm sure.

• 56:21Speaker 06

  Tough as nails, dude. Those Russians, I mean, don't mess with them. So my friend, his dad is a doctor, right? So he says, okay, we're gonna fix this right now. He's been working at the hospital since he was like 12 because Russia.

• 56:34Dax Shepard?

  Yeah.

• 56:35Speaker 01

  This is crazy.

• 56:38Speaker 06

  So he says, we're going to the hospital right now and we're gonna fix this. Hospitals were a walking distance from the discotheque. So we walked to the hospital and like I mentioned, like the electrical grid is a little bit messy. So we kind of quasi break into his dad's office and my buddy finds a suture kit and some antibacterial ointment and some cloths and cleans up Sergey's side and stitches him up.

• 57:04Dax Shepard?

  Wowzer. At 16.

• 57:06Speaker 01

  That's your dream, Dax.

• 57:07Dax Shepard?

  That is kind of my fantasy, yeah.

• 57:09Speaker 06

  And that's really, we went our separate ways and I don't think we ever talked about it again when I was there.

• 57:16Dax Shepard?

  And presumably this young man recovered. It was a successful.

• 57:20Speaker 06

  Oh, he was fine. So I'm at school the next day.

• 57:22Dax Shepard?

  Oh my god.

• 57:23Speaker 01

  School. Like he's getting stabbed and then he goes to school the next day. I mean, look, I just want to remind people, you do not get to choose where you're born.

• 57:31Dax Shepard?

  No, no.

• 57:32Speaker 01

  And to whom you're born to.

• 57:33Speaker 06

  Ain't that the truth?

• 57:34Speaker 01

  It's so important to remember that.

• 57:36Speaker 06

  The full circle part of this story is that my friend did realize his dream of becoming a neurosurgeon himself and is one to this day.

• 57:45Dax Shepard?

  You're kidding? And you guys have remained friends?

• 57:47Speaker 06

  It's been difficult. I mean, obviously things have gone a little bit sideways with Russia.

• 57:51Dax Shepard?

  Yes, yes, yes.

• 57:52Speaker 06

  In recent years, but we were until about 10 years ago in contact with each other. And in fact, he had a residency at Yale for three weeks and he came to visit us. So I took him to New York City and we like hung out for a little while.

• 58:04Dax Shepard?

  Fun.

• 58:05Speaker 06

  It was great.

• 58:06Dax Shepard?

  So he's a neurosurgeon in presumably Moscow or something in a big city, maybe?

• 58:11Speaker 06

  No, no, he's still in the same city.

• 58:12Dax Shepard?

  But now we make more than 2,000, yeah.

• 58:15Speaker 06

  Yes, he has a proper house and he is supporting his family and the economics of that area have improved.

• 58:21Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, wowzers. What a bizarre and wonderful decision you made to go to Russia to study abroad.

• 58:29Speaker 06

  I honestly didn't really want to go, but I went anyway and it was fantastic.

• 58:32Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 58:33Dax Shepard?

  Oh, boy. Well, no, this is a delight. You're a delight. Take care, brother.

• 58:38Speaker 06

  Okay, take care, guys. Bye-bye.

• 58:39Dax Shepard?

  Bye.

• 58:41Speaker 01

  What a nice man.

• 58:42Dax Shepard?

  On three, who we reminded you of?

• 58:44Speaker 01

  Okay, hold on.

• 58:44Dax Shepard?

  No, you don't have it?

• 58:45Speaker 06

  I got one.

• 58:46Dax Shepard?

  You got it, Rob? You want to join us?

• 58:48Speaker 03

  Yep.

• 58:48Dax Shepard?

  Three, two, one.

• 58:50Speaker 01

  Edward Giamatti.

• 58:52Dax Shepard?

  Yes, Paul Giamatti.

• 58:55Speaker 01

  I could see it. I could see it.

• 58:56Dax Shepard?

  It was the voice. If he's listening, it's not that he looked like him, it's just the voice was very Paul Giamatti.

• 59:00Speaker 01

  He had a similar happy face.

• 59:02Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 59:03Speaker 01

  He was great. Okay, wow. Well, people are out there, they're studying. I studied abroad twice.

• 59:08Dax Shepard?

  I don't know that this prompt made me want to study abroad.

• 59:11Speaker 01

  It's the best. Anthony could have called him because he pushed me down the stairs during a study abroad. He regrets it.

• 59:17Dax Shepard?

  Okay, intentionally or actually?

• 59:19Speaker 01

  Kind of. He was trying to save himself.

• 59:21Dax Shepard?

  What?

• 59:22Speaker 01

  We were being chased.

• 59:23Dax Shepard?

  By what?

• 59:24Speaker 01

  Police. Because we tried to get, yeah.

• 59:27Dax Shepard?

  Monica.

• 59:29Speaker 01

  I know, I know.

• 59:30Dax Shepard?

  You're saving so many layers of the onion.

• 59:32Speaker 01

  I know.

• 59:33Dax Shepard?

  You've really pasted yourself out nicely. Okay, so you ran from the police in what city?

• 59:37Speaker 01

  Only a little bit. So we were in Cannes, at the Cannes Film Festival, and we were dressed up. We were dressed up because we were trying to get into all the premieres and we couldn't get into any of the premieres that night. And so we heard that there's two fancy hotels there that the stars stay at.

• 59:53Dax Shepard?

  Sure, sure, sure.

• 59:53Speaker 01

  And so, you know, you kind of want to go and look for the stars. And then, so we thought, oh, we'll go up to the highest floor you can go to, you know?

• 1:00:05Dax Shepard?

  You're the reason they put the key. You gotta use your key to use the elevator now.

• 1:00:08Speaker 01

  Correct.

• 1:00:09Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:00:09Speaker 01

  And I don't remember if we happened to be in the elevator with someone who was going up to the top or something. We ended up in the top and wandering and then some police came up there and Anthony freaked out.

• 1:00:25Dax Shepard?

  Okay, he panicked.

• 1:00:26Speaker 01

  Just by the vision of seeing them.

• 1:00:29Dax Shepard?

  Yeah, he really felt like he was committing a crime by trespassing.

• 1:00:32Speaker 01

  Exactly.

• 1:00:32Dax Shepard?

  He overreacted.

• 1:00:33Speaker 01

  Exactly. He overreacted and then he said, run!

• 1:00:36Dax Shepard?

  Okay.

• 1:00:36Speaker 01

  And then I was like, oh my God, I guess we have to because now he's really making it seem like we've done something horrible. So then we're starting to run and I'm not running fast enough. I'm probably wearing heels and we're running down the stairs and he just pushes me to the side.

• 1:00:51Dax Shepard?

  Oh, wow. Kind of a force majeure situation.

• 1:00:54Speaker 01

  It was.

• 1:00:54Dax Shepard?

  Yeah.

• 1:00:55Speaker 01

  He pushes me to the side.

• 1:00:56Dax Shepard?

  Did you change how you looked at him? He just deserted you.

• 1:00:58Speaker 01

  He did.

• 1:00:58Dax Shepard?

  Oh, my goodness.

• 1:00:59Speaker 01

  And.

• 1:01:00Dax Shepard?

  He really showed his color.

• 1:01:01Speaker 01

  I, yeah, and then they run past me, clearly, the police.

• 1:01:05Dax Shepard?

  Yeah. Well, now he's made himself look like he's a thief.

• 1:01:08Speaker 01

  A suspect. I know. And then I, I just.

• 1:01:10Dax Shepard?

  Did he get away? They didn't, they didn't catch him, though.

• 1:01:13Speaker 01

  They did not catch him. I just walked on out and then he was just standing there looking like, you know, puppy dog.

• 1:01:19Dax Shepard?

  Uh-huh.

• 1:01:19Speaker 01

  He hates this story.

• 1:01:21Dax Shepard?

  Sure. Who wouldn't, you know?

• 1:01:23Speaker 01

  He's grown to really hate it. One day randomly, he was like, I just want to say, I'm sorry about that.

• 1:01:28Dax Shepard?

  I know. Prefer you stop telling the story.

• 1:01:31Speaker 01

  I'm never gonna stop.

• 1:01:31Dax Shepard?

  No, you've earned that right to tell that story. All right, love you.

• 1:01:35Speaker 01

  Love you.

• 1:01:38Speaker 03

  Do you want to sing a tune or something? We have a theme song.

• 1:01:40Dax Shepard?

  Oh, okay, great.