Tricked-Out Cars w/ Jeremiah Watkins!

Are You Garbage presents stand up comedian and podcast host Jeremiah Watkins! You know Jeremiah Watkins from stand up comedy, Stand-Up On The Spot, Trailer Tales, Kill Tony, Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast, Legion of Skanks, Take Your Shoes Off, Dr. Phil Live, Story Warz, You Know What Dude, The Wayback, Bein' Ian with Jordan Podcast, and so much more! Thanks for watching AYG Comedy Podcast. Love youse guys. Come to a live show! Watch AMERICAN GARBAGE: https://youtu.be/77zGwlLffWk?si=6E9dBr63JY7HgP9t AYG 2026 Live Shows: https://areyougarbage.com/pages/live-shows NEW AYG MERCH: https://areyougarbage.com/ Live Shows: https://areyougarbage.com/pages/live-shows PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/AreYouGarbage MERCH: https://areyougarbage.com/ Sponsored By: Quince: Find your next fall favorites at Quince. Download the Quince app for app-exclusive offers, or go to https://www.quince.com. Get free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Promo Code: GARBAGE BlueChew: Right now, when you buy two months of BlueChew Gold, you get the third for FREE with promo code GARBAGE. https://BlueChew.com Wayfair: Find pieces made for real life, and get even more value with Wayfair Rewards. Join Wayfair Rewards today to get five percent back on every purchase. Head to https://Wayfair.com to shop all things home. Comedians H. Foley and Kevin Ryan are self proclaimed GARBAGE. Each week a new stand up comedian gets put to the test. Steal shampoo from hotels? Own a George Foreman Grill? Ever worn JNCO Jeans? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00H. Foley?

  Stop the presses, gang. The American Garbage Special is out on YouTube right now. Numbers are cooking. We thank everybody for their support. Keep sharing it. Keep telling everybody about it. We love you.

• 0:10Speaker 01

  Yeah, and if you liked what you saw, we are on tour right now. We're gonna be in Appleton, Wisconsin, San Jose, San Diego, Tacoma, Atlanta, Philly, Springfield, Fort Wayne, Connecticut, Phoenix, Arizona, Timonium, Maryland, Milwaukee, Chicago, Cincinnati, Columbus. All tickets available at areyougarbage.com. If you got a garbage question, come out and see the boys.

• 0:31Speaker 02

  Welcome to another exciting edition of Are You Garbage? The show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals or absolute trash. Now, here are your hosts, Kevin Ryan and H. Foley.

• 0:50H. Foley?

  Hey, everybody out there, and welcome back to everybody's favorite podcast. This is Are You Garbage? You sure about that? It's our little show. We sit down with your favorite comedians and we find out if they're going to be classy.

• 1:01Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:02H. Foley?

  Or just a big old piece of trash.

• 1:03Speaker 01

  Trash, trash, trash.

• 1:04H. Foley?

  I'm your host, H. Foley, coming at you on a beautiful day. Aunt Toody wants everybody to know that, let me see what she got. That she has two tickets available for the Pars Casino Show, December 19th.

• 1:15Speaker 01

  Where'd she get those? That feels like it's coming out of the bottom line.

• 1:19H. Foley?

  With VIP access to Kevin Ryan. Exclusively with Kevin Ryan.

• 1:24Speaker 01

  Denise's house.

• 1:25H. Foley?

  At Denise's house. Two tickets.

• 1:28Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 1:28H. Foley?

  Six grand apiece.

• 1:30Speaker 01

  Sounds like an H. Foley scam, if we're being honest with you.

• 1:34H. Foley?

  My co-host is coming at you from right next to me.

• 1:36Speaker 01

  Should have been Johnny Grant.

• 1:39Speaker 01

  It's funnier. Come on.

• 1:41H. Foley?

  He is the CEO of Are You Garbage.

• 1:42Speaker 01

  Oh, bitter boy.

• 1:43H. Foley?

  International businessman.

• 1:45Speaker 01

  He's in his bag. Did you like that? He did not.

• 1:49Speaker 03

  Likes to hold a grudge.

• 1:52H. Foley?

  Kevin Ryan, ladies and gentlemen. My best pal in the whole wide world.

• 1:55Speaker 01

  Thanks a lot, Nips McGee.

• 1:58H. Foley?

  I asked for a dual XL.

• 2:01Speaker 01

  Where'd you get a schmedium? What's up, everybody? Thanks for tuning in. As always, please make sure you rate, view, subscribe on iTunes. Full video available on YouTube, and those numbers are through the fucking roof, dog. Let's go. And obviously, also, I'd be remiss if I didn't say Spotify. The boys are climbing the charts. Probably top, I call it top 20 at this point in the comedy charts. Top 100 all podcasts. Check that out. And then obviously, the greatest website of all time, www.patreon.com/areyougarbage. You go over there, you join over the seven, there's a crazy number, the 17,000 paid subscribers over there. Goddamn, Army of Garbage, baby.

• 2:35H. Foley?

  About to go on the Army of Garbage Tour.

• 2:37Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 2:38H. Foley?

  And American Garbage on YouTube.

• 2:40Speaker 01

  Check it all out.

• 2:41H. Foley?

  And gang, we could not be more excited, speaking of specials, to have our, one of our favorite people in comedy here with us today.

• 2:48Speaker 01

  Triple OG.

• 2:49H. Foley?

  He's back again. It's been a minute. We're gonna put him through the wringer. We know he's trash.

• 2:53Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 2:54H. Foley?

  Your mom's dish is what? What's the?

• 2:56Speaker 01

  Pizza boats.

• 2:56H. Foley?

  Pizza boats.

• 2:57Speaker 03

  Pizza boats.

• 2:58H. Foley?

  Got a brand new special out right now entitled Crazy Pizza on his YouTube page. You know him, you love him, you've seen him just about everywhere.

• 3:08Speaker 01

  Yeah, kid's working.

• 3:10H. Foley?

  Jeremiah Watkins.

• 3:13Speaker 03

  Good to be back, boys.

• 3:14Speaker 01

  We love it. Love you, pal.

• 3:16Speaker 03

  Love you guys.

• 3:17H. Foley?

  Good to see you.

• 3:18Speaker 01

  Good to see you.

• 3:18Speaker 03

  Fantastic to see you.

• 3:20H. Foley?

  I'd say more, but I can't really breathe.

• 3:23Speaker 03

  Yeah, are you getting light-headed right now?

• 3:25H. Foley?

  I prefer to break the fourth wall.

• 3:29Speaker 01

  And the chair. Kevy's back at it, huh?

• 3:34H. Foley?

  You're my best pal.

• 3:35Speaker 01

  Don't touch me publicly.

• 3:37H. Foley?

  I like the feel of sweat pant material, sweatshirt material, against my skin.

• 3:42Speaker 03

  Well, you asked if you could go skin to skin with it. I was like, okay, sure.

• 3:45Speaker 01

  Well, I also, listen, this was, this was just very, you know.

• 3:50H. Foley?

  Impromptu.

• 3:51Speaker 01

  Yeah, impromptu, but this is how, this is just very funny how you move. You're like, oh, do you think that would fit me? And then I turn around and you don't have an undershirt on and you're going, you got your arms, you go, is it cool if I go skin to skin? Like, you put people in, like, that's a shirt he's probably gonna wear all week doing promo, and now he's gotta be like, alright.

• 4:09H. Foley?

  Well, he wanted to hang it in the back and.

• 4:12Speaker 01

  I know. I'm just saying it was.

• 4:13H. Foley?

  It's people talking.

• 4:14Speaker 01

  Sure. Of course, we were trying to find the best place to put it, and we, once it got on, we said, that's the best place to put it. Put it on the guy.

• 4:20Speaker 03

  Do you think when I wear it later, there's gonna be the permanent nipple mark?

• 4:25Speaker 01

  Couple of swings. I didn't know nipples could get boners.

• 4:28H. Foley?

  Like a radiation shadow? You were very supportive, though, when I put it on.

• 4:33Speaker 03

  Yeah, Kevy and I made eye contact and we're like, sure.

• 4:36H. Foley?

  I believe Kevin turned around and said, man, you're really fucking feeling yourself.

• 4:40Speaker 03

  Cause when I said XL, he's like, what size is it again? I go, it's an XL.

• 4:44Speaker 01

  It looked bad? Well, you go, it's an XL, and you go, you think I got it? And then the other fucking three grown men in the room have to go, oh, yeah. Sorry, I have to call out if the 340-pound guy goes, you think I can get in this XL?

• 4:57H. Foley?

  320!

• 4:57Speaker 01

  Also, with the confidence of your shirt already off and going, I might have to puff it out a little bit. Yeah, I think that you're feeling yourself a little bit.

• 5:05Speaker 03

  Does this hoodie, does this hoodie come in leotard size?

• 5:11H. Foley?

  It's a Lululemon, right?

• 5:12Speaker 01

  I was supportive when you got it on. I said, it looks, I go, I said, it even looks better than I anticipated. Which isn't saying much. I was surprised you got it around your neck.

• 5:25H. Foley?

  I think a nipple just fell off.

• 5:26Speaker 03

  By the way, we're cutting him out of that.

• 5:31Speaker 03

  It's not coming off through the head.

• 5:33H. Foley?

  I always wanted that. I know you're in a bad spot when that happens.

• 5:37Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 5:37H. Foley?

  But I always wanted that, or wanted to do it.

• 5:39Speaker 01

  What?

• 5:40H. Foley?

  Cut, you cut somebody out of something.

• 5:42Speaker 01

  Dude, I did. I don't know if you've ever done this. I did it to my son, cause he had shit, and it blew out over everything. And then you gotta go over the head, and I'm like, this is just gonna be significantly worse.

• 5:53H. Foley?

  What'd you use? Scissors?

• 5:54Speaker 01

  No shit. Chainsaw. What the fuck do you think?

• 5:57Speaker 03

  Jaws of life.

• 5:58Speaker 01

  Yeah, called in the fire department.

• 5:59H. Foley?

  That was about a deuce.

• 6:00Speaker 01

  No, it was just more of like, what are you gonna do? And you're like, just cut him off.

• 6:04H. Foley?

  Have you been cut out or you did?

• 6:05Speaker 03

  No, I've been cut out, yeah.

• 6:07H. Foley?

  Really?

• 6:07Speaker 03

  Yeah, because I've done so many characters over the years where sometimes like when I go costume shopping, like a Goodwill or Salvation Army, like, I'm like, I'll force this to fit, and then, you know, it's a sad day when your wife has to cut you out of a dress.

• 6:23Speaker 01

  Thought this would be going the other way around.

• 6:25Speaker 03

  Yeah, I thought I was gonna be helping you, but yeah, can you take something out of the back, please?

• 6:29H. Foley?

  George, on the grocery store, I could have married him.

• 6:33H. Foley?

  Shut up and get me out of these panties. Congrats on the new special.

• 6:36Speaker 03

  Thank you.

• 6:37Speaker 01

  Yeah, very cool.

• 6:37Speaker 03

  Thank you. You guys too, man. You guys are crushing.

• 6:39Speaker 01

  They do go on, yeah.

• 6:41H. Foley?

  I saw you last night at The Cellar, and I was talking to some friends that I was with, and we were just, we were just talking about you. And they were saying that the first time they saw Kill Tony at the store, years ago, you were there.

• 6:57Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 6:57H. Foley?

  And we were just talking about all the things that you've done, how much you've, how much you've been around, how talented you are, how amazing you are, how funny you are.

• 7:05Speaker 03

  Oh, it's very kind.

• 7:06H. Foley?

  We couldn't be happier for you with the special.

• 7:08Speaker 03

  Oh, thanks.

• 7:08H. Foley?

  Crazy Pizza.

• 7:09Speaker 03

  Crazy Pizza, yeah, I'm super excited. It's, for me, what's unique about this special is I, you know, you guys have both done stand-up on the spot over the years many times. Love having you on that. And I put out so much riffing content that this special is just pure material the whole time. I don't talk to the crowd at all. It's just jokes, baby.

• 7:27Speaker 01

  If you want that, too. If you want someone talking to the crowd, tune into American Garbage.

• 7:30Speaker 03

  There you go.

• 7:32Speaker 01

  We're both going the other ways there.

• 7:33Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 7:35H. Foley?

  So let's, let's discuss. Now, I gotta tell you, you sent us a picture of fresh pizza boats that came out of the oven.

• 7:44Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 7:44H. Foley?

  Not that long ago.

• 7:46Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 7:46H. Foley?

  And they looked pretty goddamn good.

• 7:48Speaker 03

  Yeah, they're delicious.

• 7:49H. Foley?

  Describe it again.

• 7:51Speaker 03

  It's basically French bread that's like cut in half.

• 7:55Speaker 01

  Slice it.

• 7:55Speaker 03

  Sliced it, and then you put like the marinara, or it's usually just pizza sauce from one of those jars, jarred pizza sauce. And then you put like some mozzarella cheese.

• 8:07H. Foley?

  Wasn't there meat on there? Don't you use ground beef?

• 8:09Speaker 03

  Yeah, ground beef, some pepperoni, and sometimes green peppers.

• 8:14Speaker 01

  When did you move here from Sicily?

• 8:17Speaker 03

  Very recently. My English is still working on it.

• 8:21H. Foley?

  I live in the Canaari.

• 8:23Speaker 03

  Have you had our authentic pizza boat?

• 8:27H. Foley?

  From Naples. So we wanna run you back through the wringer just a little bit. You know, it's been a while. We got some new stuff we wanna talk to you about. Mostly what's going on now.

• 8:36Speaker 03

  Sure.

• 8:37H. Foley?

  Kevin?

• 8:39Speaker 01

  It's a guy who's done his prep.

• 8:44Speaker 01

  Alright, and we're gonna kick it over to Kevin, who did his job today.

• 8:48Speaker 03

  Alright, Kevin over in sports is gonna take this one now.

• 8:51Speaker 01

  I panic. What? Um, well, you know, it's been, I just looked, 2023 was the last time you were here.

• 8:58Speaker 03

  Oh, wow, it has been a minute.

• 8:59Speaker 01

  Fucking three years. Were you in this studio, or was it the old one?

• 9:02Speaker 03

  I think I may have been here, like, I think you guys had just moved in, because I think that you were dealing with like some frequency issues or something?

• 9:10Speaker 01

  Yeah, that was old school.

• 9:12Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 9:14Speaker 01

  Still kinda dealing with them. If you're on the Patreon, you can check it out.

• 9:18H. Foley?

  Hold on a second.

• 9:22Speaker 01

  Um, let's see. A few things started off real.

• 9:27Speaker 01

  This guy's doing his own show.

• 9:31H. Foley?

  I'm sorry. I get giddy when he's here.

• 9:33Speaker 01

  Sure, of course. He's a good time, he's a good hang. You can always tell, because like you came, obviously, you can tell when we're really friends with people, cause you come and go, sit down. And then we chop. Other people were sitting here waiting, being like, he's a minute late.

• 9:44Speaker 03

  Yeah, I enjoyed that. That doesn't happen on many pods where you just get a, you know, catch up and hang a little bit before going into it.

• 9:50Speaker 01

  You gotta, you gotta get it, you gotta get it going.

• 9:52Speaker 03

  Gotta get the gears going.

• 9:54H. Foley?

  If he would have got here, we would have ordered a pizza, got the sleeping bags out, went over to the lounge, thrown on a Ghostbusters. I would have been totally okay with it.

• 10:02Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah. Sleepover pod has to happen.

• 10:07Speaker 03

  I was, I was the, I was the house where we would have the best snacks.

• 10:13Speaker 01

  Really?

• 10:13Speaker 03

  I was the snack house.

• 10:14Speaker 01

  So give us a rundown of what was, what was in the pantry. And what did you call the pantry? Did you call it the pantry?

• 10:19Speaker 03

  Well, we had something called, at one point, we had the pantry, but we called it the Y2K closet for a while.

• 10:25Speaker 01

  Oh, God. You guys were kinda prepping. I forgot that. You were prepping.

• 10:29Speaker 03

  We were doomsdayers.

• 10:30H. Foley?

  There's no way that you can have the snack house and have the Y2K closet.

• 10:35Speaker 03

  Yeah, you can have both. Yeah, there's lots of.

• 10:36H. Foley?

  You guys want some dried deer meat?

• 10:38Speaker 01

  Do you ever have Goldfish crackers underground?

• 10:40Speaker 03

  Hey, can I grab you a Capri Sun or a gallon of water?

• 10:45H. Foley?

  Tint of black olives?

• 10:46Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 10:47H. Foley?

  So, the Y2K closet.

• 10:49Speaker 01

  Okay, well, how did that start? What year did that, do you remember what, like, did that start way ahead of time?

• 10:54Speaker 03

  Uh, 2004.

• 10:58Speaker 03

  We're behind on the times.

• 11:00Speaker 01

  It's good, man.

• 11:01H. Foley?

  Chinese calendar.

• 11:02Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 11:04H. Foley?

  Go ahead.

• 11:04Speaker 03

  Yeah, that was like, uh, that was like, uh, late 90s. That was late 90s.

• 11:08H. Foley?

  Give me, give us dimensions. First of all, where is it located in the home?

• 11:11Speaker 03

  It was in the basement.

• 11:12H. Foley?

  It was in the basement?

• 11:13Speaker 01

  Obviously.

• 11:13H. Foley?

  Now, any good, any good shop, you know, bunker is gonna be subterranean. How deep was it? Or was it just on shelves in the basement?

• 11:21Speaker 03

  Yeah, shelves like in a closet kind of area.

• 11:24H. Foley?

  Gotcha.

• 11:24Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 11:24H. Foley?

  Now, what's the door between the basement and the rest of the house?

• 11:28Speaker 01

  Anything that can fend off looters.

• 11:29H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 11:30Speaker 03

  Oh, no.

• 11:31H. Foley?

  So, yeah.

• 11:32Speaker 03

  It was the living room door and then garage door and then straight down the stairs and then like pretty close was the Y2K closet. So like if there was looters, it'd be the first thing to go.

• 11:41Speaker 01

  What was it? Was it just the normal closet door or anything reinforced?

• 11:44Speaker 03

  No, no.

• 11:45Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 11:46Speaker 03

  No, no. No, we had guns for that. We had guns for that.

• 11:49H. Foley?

  Did you guys have nickel in the house?

• 11:50Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 11:50H. Foley?

  They had some guns?

• 11:51Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah.

• 11:51Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 11:51Speaker 03

  I grew up guns. We would sometimes, well, my mom wasn't thrilled about this, but my dad would have us shoot guns in the basement sometimes and that was a little crazy.

• 11:59H. Foley?

  What? What are you guys in the mob? That's how Clemenza trained Michael to kill fucking sloths.

• 12:05Speaker 03

  We'd shoot like pellet guns and stuff down there and we'd set up like, like targets and yeah.

• 12:09Speaker 01

  That's fun.

• 12:10Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 12:10Speaker 01

  That's...

• 12:11H. Foley?

  I have a, I have a question about this, but let's, let's go back. So what, what is, what is in the Y2K basement?

• 12:17Speaker 03

  Uh, there is every canned food imaginable, tons of ramen noodles, tons of gallons of water, uh, lots of, but also like our other fun stuff. Doritos, Pop Tarts, uh...

• 12:31Speaker 01

  Now, would you dip into them at all if you ran out of Pop Tarts or Doritos? But, but you know, upstairs.

• 12:37Speaker 03

  We would keep like reloading it.

• 12:39Speaker 01

  Gosh.

• 12:39Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 12:40Speaker 01

  That was like kind of, that was kind of like the walk-in closet, like the, the walk-in freezer.

• 12:44Speaker 03

  Yeah, we didn't have like the space for it in the actual kitchen, so we put it down in the bunker.

• 12:48H. Foley?

  So, you were, you were in high school or whatever before Y2K, right? Or no?

• 12:53Speaker 03

  Uh, no, I was in high school, oh, oh, 407.

• 12:58H. Foley?

  Oh, so this was after. So you guys knew it was cool. So you had a surplus of everything?

• 13:01Speaker 03

  Yeah. Yeah. So, well, it was when we, prime Y2K.

• 13:08Speaker 01

  You were probably like 10 or something.

• 13:09H. Foley?

  What does that?

• 13:09Speaker 03

  Yeah, that was, yeah, it would have been like around 10, 11, 12, right before. Yeah.

• 13:14H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 13:14Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 13:15H. Foley?

  What'd you guys do on New Year's Eve that, that year?

• 13:18Speaker 03

  Uh, we were over at a, a friend's.

• 13:20H. Foley?

  Really?

• 13:21Speaker 03

  Yeah, we went over to a friend's.

• 13:22H. Foley?

  I figured you'd be down there cleaning your guns and shit.

• 13:24Speaker 03

  No, we went over and I'll never forget, uh, there was like, uh, the dad, he, uh, he turned on the faucet and he goes, "Water's still running."

• 13:33Speaker 01

  That's a good bit, dude.

• 13:34H. Foley?

  Were they in on it too? Or no?

• 13:36Speaker 03

  Yeah, I mean, I think that they were like, it was like half joking, half like, uh, like, is everything gonna like actually crap out?

• 13:41Speaker 01

  That was a scary time, dude. Especially if you were a young kid. That was scary.

• 13:45H. Foley?

  Well, your parents like tense that night?

• 13:46Speaker 03

  I think everybody's like, huh, all right, it's New Year's, but like, is it gonna be the end of the world? Huh?

• 13:51H. Foley?

  Your dad definitely had a, sorry, your dad definitely had a gun on him somewhere, in the car or something.

• 13:55Speaker 03

  He probably had one in the car. He probably, he still does to this day. He usually has like a...

• 13:58H. Foley?

  He doesn't shoot the neighbors?

• 13:59Speaker 01

  I swear to God, everything better shut down.

• 14:01Speaker 03

  My dad lit his car on fire like, uh, a couple of years ago on accident. He left incense burning in the car.

• 14:08Speaker 01

  In the car?

• 14:08Speaker 03

  In the car. He's like, he was gonna try to, to, to clean out the smell and he...

• 14:12Speaker 01

  Why, hold on, why did it smell originally?

• 14:15Speaker 03

  Uh, he might have been smoking pot in there.

• 14:16H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 14:17Speaker 03

  Yeah. And so he's like, I'm gonna clean it out with incense. And then the inside of his car completely burned out, where you could see the floor, like, and you could see through, there's like sunlight going through the floor like Fred Flintstone style.

• 14:31H. Foley?

  Whoa.

• 14:32Speaker 03

  Yeah. Burned out the center console.

• 14:33Speaker 01

  What kind of car was that?

• 14:35Speaker 03

  It was like a Nissan, uh, like a Maxima or Altima or something like that.

• 14:39Speaker 01

  That's a car, dude.

• 14:40H. Foley?

  He drives an Altima?

• 14:41Speaker 03

  My dad, my dad flips cars like crazy.

• 14:43Speaker 01

  Of course he does. They're fucking, they're catching fire every other week.

• 14:46H. Foley?

  Yeah, boy. That's crazy.

• 14:48Speaker 01

  My dad, I've never heard flips cars either. My dad sells cars. My dad's into the car business. Flipping cars is a little different.

• 14:55Speaker 03

  Well, flip means you don't have them for very long.

• 14:58Speaker 01

  Flip means you're throwing them, you know, you, you hit it with some spray paint and keep it moving.

• 15:01Speaker 03

  He's, he said he used to way back in the day, uh, roll back odometers, but then like after...

• 15:07Speaker 01

  That's a, that's a...

• 15:08H. Foley?

  I wish I could do that.

• 15:09Speaker 01

  That's a lost art.

• 15:10Speaker 03

  It is. It is. Yeah.

• 15:11H. Foley?

  You can't do it on, on digital ones now, right?

• 15:13Speaker 03

  No, I don't think so. I think there's, there might be ways to hack the computer system, but I don't think it's as...

• 15:18Speaker 01

  I'm sure you can, but there's, that's like a serious crime now. It used to be like kitschy of like, ah, yeah, you go down to Pete, he rolls back odometers.

• 15:25Speaker 03

  He said, he said, "I stopped doing it when you kids were born."

• 15:28H. Foley?

  What, what is the big deal?

• 15:30Speaker 03

  I mean, it's, it's a serious offense.

• 15:32Speaker 01

  You can take a, cause if it's like a hundred thousand, if it's a hundred thousand miles and you roll it back to like, hey, it's got 25,000 miles, you just took essentially, I'm making up a number, $20,000. You can sell it for $20,000 more.

• 15:42Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 15:43H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 15:43Speaker 01

  So you're like really ripping people off of hard earned money.

• 15:46Speaker 03

  For example...

• 15:47Speaker 01

  All the time.

• 15:47Speaker 03

  I, I tried to buy a Prius.

• 15:49Speaker 01

  Print money.

• 15:50Speaker 03

  Yeah. Oh, no, for sure.

• 15:51H. Foley?

  It's not because the car becomes more unsafe.

• 15:54Speaker 01

  I mean, one, it's unsafe.

• 15:55Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 15:56Speaker 01

  Well, it's like, I think it's really, I mean, Luke, do you have anything on the...

• 15:59Speaker 04

  Yeah, you can get up to three years per count.

• 16:01Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 16:02Speaker 03

  Whoa.

• 16:03Speaker 04

  It's like per car.

• 16:03H. Foley?

  Oh.

• 16:04Speaker 04

  So if you do it for multiple cars, you can get up to 10 years, they say.

• 16:08H. Foley?

  I wonder how a guy who rolls back odometers would fare in prison. I feel like if someone like murderer was like, "What'd you get? What are you in here for? Rolled back odometers." Everybody like, hmm.

• 16:15Speaker 01

  I did. It was kind of like, it's like a kitschy crime.

• 16:18Speaker 03

  Oh, you like rolling back? All right, get on your back now.

• 16:21H. Foley?

  Actually, I would hope not.

• 16:23Speaker 03

  I'll put some miles back on you.

• 16:24H. Foley?

  Fuck. I walked right into that.

• 16:27Speaker 03

  Yeah, I tried to buy like a Prius years ago when I was, uh...

• 16:31H. Foley?

  You're bragging.

• 16:31Speaker 03

  I know, when I was a...

• 16:32Speaker 01

  Also tried, as well.

• 16:37H. Foley?

  Can you roll the odometer up a little bit?

• 16:39Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 16:40Speaker 01

  Knock a couple of bucks off this thing. I'm paying cash. Does that matter?

• 16:45Speaker 03

  I was gonna buy it from this guy and then I was like, my gut was like, there's something off about this car. It's too good of a deal, kind of a situation.

• 16:52H. Foley?

  Right.

• 16:52Speaker 03

  And then, uh, I did a Carfax report on it and he had rolled back the odometer on me.

• 16:57Speaker 01

  No shit.

• 16:57Speaker 03

  Yes. Yeah, it had like 250,000 miles and, and, uh, he was selling, he was selling it for like a, a Prius for five grand and the, it was like 73,000 miles on it. And I was like, this is an amazing deal. And then I was like, I'm gonna spend the 150 bucks on the, the Carfax report. And then I was like, hey, man, I just did this. He's, and he's like, oh, I'm sorry. I'm, I'm like, just get out of here.

• 17:22Speaker 01

  They take it. They don't want your kind around here.

• 17:24Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 17:25H. Foley?

  Shoot off of 2,500.

• 17:27Speaker 03

  No, I didn't know what else was wrong with the car at that point. If you're gonna lie about one thing on a car, then you, you're willing to lie about literally anything. If you're looking at me in the face and you're willing to shake my hand and be like, you know?

• 17:38H. Foley?

  Fair enough.

• 17:38Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 17:40Speaker 01

  Tell Foley how lying works. Um, please. Um, no, that, that's pretty big now. People are still doing that. Uh, I think in like, uh, what they're doing now is like swapping the Carfax.

• 17:53Speaker 03

  Oh.

• 17:54Speaker 01

  They're going, oh, hey, they hit you up on whatever Facebook Marketplace and they go, hey, it's a 2004 whatever, blah, blah, blah. And they go, they go, oh, I pulled the Carfax for you. And then they show you one for like a different VIN number.

• 18:05Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 18:05Speaker 01

  And they rip you off that way.

• 18:06Speaker 03

  That's crazy.

• 18:07H. Foley?

  At Foley's Auto Land, we do not do that.

• 18:09Speaker 01

  I, I kind of respect like the hand-to-hand shady business tactics a little bit.

• 18:14H. Foley?

  Me too.

• 18:15Speaker 01

  You know what I mean?

• 18:16H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 18:17Speaker 03

  I might...

• 18:17H. Foley?

  Screw me a little bit.

• 18:18Speaker 01

  Well, like, it's just like everybody, if not, then you have to have some weariness as, as a buyer of like, hey...

• 18:25H. Foley?

  Half of those hundreds are fake anyways.

• 18:26Speaker 03

  You know what my dad's trick was when he would sell cars?

• 18:28Speaker 01

  Yeah, let's go.

• 18:29Speaker 03

  Okay, this is like a, a great one. If anybody is giving you a test drive in their car, uh, don't let them turn on the radio or the, the music for very long because the reason why they're turning it up is to hide all the mechanical issues that are going on in the car.

• 18:44Speaker 01

  All the bumps and fucking, they're rattling.

• 18:46Speaker 03

  So he'd be like, he's like, "This is an incredible Bose sound system here."

• 18:50Speaker 01

  Kitten rose got that in my mind, man.

• 18:53Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 18:53Speaker 01

  Cranking.

• 18:54Speaker 03

  Cranking it, dude.

• 18:55H. Foley?

  You like Metallica?

• 18:56Speaker 01

  You hear that double bass of drowning out everything?

• 18:59H. Foley?

  That's Neil Peart. Do you like System of a Down?

• 19:02Speaker 01

  Zoad. Um...

• 19:05H. Foley?

  Ah, all right.

• 19:06Speaker 01

  My, I think I told this one time, but my buddies were used to, he worked at a mechanic shop, uh, his dad did. And he was selling a motorcycle and the guy came in to test drive the car or the motorcycle. He was like, oh, just leave your car here. And he can go test drive the motorcycle. He had a guy laying in the backseat with an extra set of keys after he left, hopped up, brrr, left.

• 19:28Speaker 03

  Whoa.

• 19:29Speaker 01

  I respect that shit.

• 19:31Speaker 03

  That's wild.

• 19:32Speaker 01

  That's like hand-to-hand 80s fucking scumbag shit.

• 19:35Speaker 03

  That sounds like the beginning of an epic action movie.

• 19:38H. Foley?

  Where you scream?

• 19:39Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 19:42H. Foley?

  bags. Okay, let's talk about Quince.

• 19:45Speaker 01

  Quince.

• 19:46H. Foley?

  As you know, if you don't know, Quince focuses on high quality wardrobe staples made with premium materials like a hundred percent. You ready for this?

• 19:54Speaker 01

  Hit me.

• 19:54H. Foley?

  Mongolian cashmere. We're talking about organic cotton and merino wool.

• 19:59Speaker 01

  Mm hmm.

• 19:59H. Foley?

  Merino wool, Kippy.

• 20:00Speaker 01

  Nice.

• 20:01H. Foley?

  That's good stuff.

• 20:02Speaker 01

  It's the stuff my wife likes.

• 20:03H. Foley?

  Styles are timeless. They're versatile, designed to become the dependable pieces for you for the everyday.

• 20:09Speaker 01

  Yes. Listen, uh, I was a little, I'd never used Quince. They, they, they, they let it, they, they, they sent us some, some products. They let us order some products. I went on, I was like, ah, let me get, dude.

• 20:21H. Foley?

  I have their socks on right now.

• 20:22Speaker 01

  I wear their pants. If I, all the time. I, I have, I have about, I'm not even lying, probably about four or five pairs of their gray. I don't want to say slacks. They're not cack, whatever they are. I don't know what they are.

• 20:32H. Foley?

  Right in the middle.

• 20:33Speaker 01

  But I love them. They look good. I can wear them out to dinner. I can wear them to, to a show. I can wear them to record. I, they're casual, but not casual. They look good. They're right in the middle. They look good. And that's how I do it. Shout out to Quince, baby. Uh, and if it's not just clothing, Quince brings that same approach to everything they make from hotel qua, hotel quality bedding, which my wife ordered years ago, by the way, to bath and kitchen essentials and thoughtfully designed furniture. I didn't even know they were in a furniture game. They make well-designed pieces for everyday living. Find your next fall items, your next fall favorites at Quince. Download the Quince app for exclusive offers or go to quince.com and get free shipping to you for your order for 365 day returns.

• 21:14Speaker 01

  Now available in Canada and the UK too. And when Quince asks how you heard about them, tell them, are you garbage sent ya? It's the best way to support the show. Do it.

• 21:23H. Foley?

  Yes. Kevin, let's talk about BlueChew.

• 21:25Speaker 01

  BlueChew.

• 21:26H. Foley?

  Let's talk about more specifically that BlueChew Gold.

• 21:30Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 21:30H. Foley?

  They just keep innovating. They just keep getting better. Gang, I am not just a spokesman. I am a client.

• 21:38Speaker 01

  Woo.

• 21:38H. Foley?

  And we're talking, let's go. Listen, I'm 50 years old. You get a little older, things start slowing down. Your intimate moments, you want to bring the heat. Got to bring the heat with these broads, Kippy. You know what I'm saying?

• 21:50Speaker 01

  Sure. So I'm told.

• 21:51H. Foley?

  Do yourself, I've seen it in magazines. Gang, do yourself a favor. Get yourself straightened out over there at BlueChew.

• 21:59Speaker 01

  Yeah. BlueChew Gold has, uh, four powerful ingredients. That's the big thing. They got two for the blood flow, which clear everything out. Boom. Get everything where it needs to go and two for our alzol.

• 22:11H. Foley?

  Talk about a, talk about a hot rod.

• 22:12Speaker 01

  More sensual. Tune it in. Ew, ew, ew. Get your rods and cones all screwed in right.

• 22:19H. Foley?

  Your head will be spinning around like the Exorcist.

• 22:21Speaker 01

  Uh, you enter the new era of stress-free sex with the number one brand for better sex. No in-person doctor visits, no waiting rooms, just simple online process and bam, you got a boner.

• 22:30H. Foley?

  Oh, yeah.

• 22:30Speaker 01

  You're now.

• 22:31H. Foley?

  Hello.

• 22:32Speaker 01

  Uh, here it is, gang. Experience it yourself at bluechew.com. They got a special deal for Are You Garbage listeners right now. When you buy two months of BlueChew Gold, you get the third for free with the promo code garbage. That's promo code garbage. You'll receive an additional 10% off plus overnight shipping for your first order. Visit bluechew.com for more details, important safety information. We thank BlueChew for sponsoring the pod and the bedroom down.

• 22:55H. Foley?

  Yes, we do. All right. Let's talk a little business here. Do you have any fake, uh, like covers of magazines? Like as a kid, like from your, like your Little League or anything like that? Like, you know?

• 23:05Speaker 01

  Fake covers?

• 23:07H. Foley?

  You know what I mean? Like they would take your picture.

• 23:08Speaker 01

  Picture would be posed. You'd be sitting there holding the bat. It would be like Sports Illustrated, local kid fights dog or anything.

• 23:14Speaker 03

  Oh no, I didn't have anything like that. I had like, uh, I would collect like the pennants for a while from different sports teams and different stuff like that. But no, didn't have, I mean, I've got a lot of different soccer shots of me like holding the ball awkwardly and me kneeling next to it.

• 23:29H. Foley?

  In studio or on the field?

• 23:30Speaker 03

  On the field.

• 23:31Speaker 01

  That was, yeah.

• 23:32Speaker 03

  Yeah, always on the field.

• 23:33H. Foley?

  Did you guys ever get an old time photo taken?

• 23:35Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 23:36H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 23:36Speaker 03

  Oh, we got some good, a couple of good ones.

• 23:38H. Foley?

  Gangster or western?

• 23:39Speaker 03

  I'm holding a gun in one of them.

• 23:40Speaker 01

  Tommy gun or something.

• 23:41Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 23:41H. Foley?

  Gangster or western?

• 23:42Speaker 03

  I'm holding a gun and a bowl cut. Uh, western. Yeah.

• 23:46Speaker 01

  Where, where would that happen?

• 23:47Speaker 03

  That was in Arkansas.

• 23:49H. Foley?

  Hmm.

• 23:50Speaker 01

  At like a part, like an amusement park or like what was the?

• 23:54Speaker 03

  No, that was their technology. That was, that was their only technology that they

• 23:57Speaker 01

  That was a standalone old timey photo place. Really crazy.

• 24:00H. Foley?

  That's why you went there?

• 24:01Speaker 03

  I, in Colorado and I think Arkansas, we got our pictures taken.

• 24:05Speaker 01

  No, he's trashy. Colorado.

• 24:06H. Foley?

  Colorado.

• 24:07Speaker 03

  Colorado.

• 24:07Speaker 01

  Colorado.

• 24:08Speaker 03

  Colorado.

• 24:09H. Foley?

  Shit, okay.

• 24:10Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 24:11Speaker 01

  Uh, let's say you're staying at a hotel. You're at like the whatever, the Hilton Garden Inn. You're in, you know, Tulsa for the weekend. Will you swim in that pool?

• 24:19Speaker 03

  Ooh, um, I have in the past, but I definitely don't make the time to do it anymore.

• 24:26Speaker 01

  If you go on the road or you go, I'm bringing my trunks.

• 24:30Speaker 03

  No, and like now that I have kids, it's a little bit different. Like I, we did, uh, I did a weekend out of town where like, I was like, we're going to utilize this, this pool, kind of a thing to like to get their energy out.

• 24:40Speaker 01

  Sure.

• 24:40Speaker 03

  But I don't like, if I'm headlining alone on the weekends, I'm not bringing trunks to go swimming in Tulsa.

• 24:46Speaker 01

  Dude, I don't get on a plane without a, without, without a pair.

• 24:49Speaker 03

  Yeah, really?

• 24:50Speaker 01

  Without a pair of trunks and flippy floppies.

• 24:51Speaker 03

  But I mean, if I, if I'm really desperate, I always have basketball shorts. I can always swim in basketball shorts.

• 24:55H. Foley?

  I'm a little surprised that that answered.

• 24:57Speaker 03

  Really?

• 24:58H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 24:59Speaker 03

  You'd be, you'd be. Think I would be a, you know?

• 25:01H. Foley?

  In the, in the.

• 25:01Speaker 03

  Cause I got a shark fin attached to my face?

• 25:04H. Foley?

  He's got a two-star hotel pool vibe.

• 25:06Speaker 01

  Yeah. You kind of got a guy who was like, pool?

• 25:09H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 25:09Speaker 01

  Getting in that. Like you're like, you, you know, you kind of have the vibes of you're not sure when you're going to be around another pool. So you're like, I gotta get it in.

• 25:15Speaker 03

  I gotta maximize my time with this. This is the biggest body of water I'm looking at for a while.

• 25:21Speaker 01

  Landlocked. Yeah. Okay. All right. Hey, you know?

• 25:24H. Foley?

  Do you or any member, do you or any member of your family have any Harley Davidson merch? It could be a magnet. It could be a shirt.

• 25:33Speaker 03

  My dad.

• 25:33H. Foley?

  He does.

• 25:34Speaker 03

  My dad has to have some kind of.

• 25:35H. Foley?

  Does he have a Harley?

• 25:37Speaker 03

  Uh, no.

• 25:38H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 25:39Speaker 01

  Got a Prius.

• 25:40Speaker 03

  I think, I think it's his, I think it's his dream to go to Sturgis some year. That's like, like something that he'll to go. Yeah. He wants to go, but he doesn't have a bike.

• 25:49H. Foley?

  What is Sturgis?

• 25:49Speaker 01

  It's like a, it's like a big bike fest.

• 25:51Speaker 03

  It's a gathering of the juggalos, but for bikers.

• 25:53Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 25:53H. Foley?

  Can non-biker people go?

• 25:55Speaker 01

  Yeah. I think you go and like, I think there's like, nah, I don't want to say parades to.

• 25:58H. Foley?

  They probably really bitch you out.

• 25:59Speaker 01

  To soften it up. But like, there's like buddy drive down and you know?

• 26:02Speaker 03

  I think there's different layers of leather that you go down like, you know, the seven layers of.

• 26:08H. Foley?

  Don't they do something like that in Myrtle Beach too?

• 26:10Speaker 01

  I was there. I was there. I caught like the last day or the first day of bike week when we were down there for something in high school. It's, it's a, it's a vibe, dude.

• 26:19Speaker 03

  We had a, one of my favorite things, we didn't have a motorcycle ever, but my dad had a 1985 Honda Arrow, a moped. And we used to ride that around the neighborhood everywhere.

• 26:30Speaker 01

  Eyes on that.

• 26:31Speaker 03

  It would top out.

• 26:32Speaker 01

  Honda Arrowhead?

• 26:33Speaker 03

  Uh, a Honda Arrow.

• 26:34Speaker 01

  That's not even coming up.

• 26:36H. Foley?

  Eight hundred thousand miles on it.

• 26:37Speaker 03

  1985.

• 26:38H. Foley?

  1985?

• 26:40Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 26:41Speaker 01

  Oh, Arrow. Oh, that's sick.

• 26:42Speaker 03

  It's awesome.

• 26:44Speaker 01

  You are from Sicily. Look at that thing.

• 26:46H. Foley?

  A bajorno.

• 26:47Speaker 01

  A bajorno.

• 26:48Speaker 03

  The fruity. Yep.

• 26:49H. Foley?

  That's all right.

• 26:50Speaker 01

  Yeah, that's not bad, dude.

• 26:52H. Foley?

  Let's say something George Michaels would film a video on.

• 26:54Speaker 03

  My sister would hop on the back of it and we'd go down these hills and it would start to get the wobbles.

• 26:59Speaker 01

  Speed, speed wobbles.

• 27:01Speaker 03

  I, it would top out at 50 where the, literally it would like, it would start like redlining like at 50 miles an hour downhill and then you'd start feeling it.

• 27:08H. Foley?

  50 is crazy.

• 27:09Speaker 03

  Yeah, 50 on a moped was fast, dude.

• 27:11H. Foley?

  Crazy.

• 27:11Speaker 03

  It was fast.

• 27:12H. Foley?

  I used to remember that feeling when you're going down a hill on your, on your bicycle.

• 27:15Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 27:15H. Foley?

  And the fucking thing. I, you feel like fucking Chuck Yeager in the fucking X3.

• 27:19Speaker 03

  And no helmets or anything.

• 27:20H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 27:20Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 27:21H. Foley?

  She's breaking apart.

• 27:22Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 27:22Speaker 01

  Damn, you get 70 miles per gallon on that bad boy.

• 27:24Speaker 03

  Uh huh.

• 27:25Speaker 01

  Woo.

• 27:26H. Foley?

  Mm hmm. Traded it straight up for the van. Anybody?

• 27:29Speaker 03

  Dumb and Dumber Rex. Come on, baby. Come on.

• 27:31Speaker 01

  Traded some kid in town, straight up.

• 27:33H. Foley?

  Anybody in your family or you say, when you drive by a cop towards the end of the month, end of the month, they got to make their quota?

• 27:41Speaker 03

  Yeah, for sure.

• 27:42H. Foley?

  Dirtbag.

• 27:43Speaker 01

  When was the last time you were pulled over?

• 27:44H. Foley?

  Yeah, good question.

• 27:46Speaker 03

  Ooh, it's been years. I'm pretty good though. I'm a pretty good driver. Uh, I've only.

• 27:51Speaker 01

  Sensible.

• 27:51Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah. I, I don't really speed too often. I've been, the last time I was pulled over was years ago and it was for tags, expired tags.

• 27:59H. Foley?

  Sick.

• 27:59Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 28:00Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 28:00H. Foley?

  Riding.

• 28:01Speaker 03

  But I've never got a speeding ticket before. Never gotten one of those.

• 28:04Speaker 01

  I've only gotten one.

• 28:05H. Foley?

  Never.

• 28:06Speaker 03

  I've been the passenger in many car accidents when the cops show up, but yeah.

• 28:11Speaker 01

  How many? That sounds like too many. You're running with the wrong crowd.

• 28:14Speaker 03

  Multiple. Yeah. Multiple where I'm in the passenger seat or in the back.

• 28:17Speaker 01

  I don't think that's ever happened to me.

• 28:19H. Foley?

  That's so trashy.

• 28:20Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 28:21Speaker 03

  I've been, I've been in like four or five. Yeah.

• 28:25Speaker 01

  That's too many, man.

• 28:26Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah. And then I've been driving, I've been hit so many times in LA.

• 28:29H. Foley?

  Huh.

• 28:30Speaker 03

  I've been hit so many times in LA in my car. And the current car that I drive.

• 28:34Speaker 01

  And what do you do? Just shake it off and keep going?

• 28:37Speaker 03

  Well, that's the, the amazing thing about when you don't have a nice car is like.

• 28:41Speaker 01

  What do you have? What's the, what's the, what's the day to day now?

• 28:44Speaker 03

  So like as far as like driving that car?

• 28:46Speaker 01

  Your car? What's your car?

• 28:47Speaker 03

  Oh, okay. Well, this is probably the trashiest thing about me.

• 28:50Speaker 01

  I'll be the judge of that.

• 28:51Speaker 03

  Uh, it's one of them. It's a.

• 28:53Speaker 01

  Pizza boat?

• 28:55H. Foley?

  Pizza boat might be.

• 28:56Speaker 03

  Just rowing down the street.

• 28:58H. Foley?

  A bajorno.

• 28:59Speaker 01

  A bajorno.

• 29:00H. Foley?

  You got to see me there.

• 29:01Speaker 03

  Uh, it's a 2012 Honda CRZ, uh, which is.

• 29:04Speaker 01

  CRZ?

• 29:05Speaker 03

  Yeah, that's discontinued.

• 29:06Speaker 01

  I was going to say.

• 29:07H. Foley?

  Are they?

• 29:07Speaker 03

  Yep. They no longer.

• 29:09H. Foley?

  Oh, CRV.

• 29:10Speaker 01

  CRZ.

• 29:11Speaker 03

  Z is in zebra.

• 29:12H. Foley?

  CRV is nice. The new ones.

• 29:14Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 29:14H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 29:15Speaker 01

  Oh, that little guy.

• 29:17Speaker 03

  This little guy. Mine's a, mine's a blue one.

• 29:19Speaker 01

  What, that color blue? No.

• 29:21Speaker 03

  No.

• 29:22Speaker 01

  That's a 2026.

• 29:22Speaker 03

  Mine's like a darker blue.

• 29:23Speaker 01

  Oh, that's a prelude.

• 29:24Speaker 03

  Yeah. Honda CRZ.

• 29:27Speaker 01

  This guy.

• 29:27Speaker 03

  Yeah, that guy.

• 29:29Speaker 01

  Right?

• 29:29Speaker 03

  Yep. Yep, yep, yep.

• 29:31Speaker 01

  That's a little guy. Little two-door?

• 29:32Speaker 03

  Well, that's tricked out, but yeah, it's a two-door coupe.

• 29:34Speaker 01

  No, it's not.

• 29:35Speaker 03

  That was tricked out.

• 29:36Speaker 01

  Hey, that was.

• 29:37Speaker 03

  It's got rims and it's got a special grill. That is a tricked out Honda CRZ.

• 29:40Speaker 01

  That's a rim.

• 29:41Speaker 03

  You don't consider those rims?

• 29:42Speaker 01

  They're stock rims. There's a Honda emblem on them.

• 29:45Speaker 03

  No, those are like, those are rim, those are nice rims.

• 29:48Speaker 01

  I mean, I'm not saying they're bad rims, but I wouldn't say that's tricked out.

• 29:52Speaker 03

  This is a tricked out car.

• 29:53H. Foley?

  Dude, what's that, Little Wayne? That's crazy.

• 29:57Speaker 03

  How do you, I'm surprised that you guys don't think that's a tricked out car.

• 30:00H. Foley?

  That's like, that's got 17s on it. They stink.

• 30:03Speaker 01

  Tricked out is, they're stock. I've never.

• 30:07H. Foley?

  That's the devil's car.

• 30:11Speaker 03

  Dude, I'm telling you, those are like nice aluminum alloy wheels.

• 30:14Speaker 01

  What do you have?

• 30:15Speaker 03

  Um, well, mine-

• 30:16Speaker 01

  Wooden wheels? What the fuck?

• 30:17Speaker 03

  Well, mine is so-

• 30:18Speaker 01

  It's part Stagecoach.

• 30:20Speaker 03

  Yeah, but basically, uh, the paint is all completely oxidized off of most of the car because of the sun.

• 30:27Speaker 01

  Sure.

• 30:27Speaker 03

  Has just like wiped it out. And then the wheels and everything, like, I've been hit so many times, like, in different parts of my car that, like, I got hit by, literally, the owner of the Comedy Store, and he's like, "Oh, did I hit your car?" I'm like, "Yeah," I'm like, "It's alright."

• 30:41Speaker 01

  Yeah. I've had cars like that.

• 30:43Speaker 03

  Yeah. Uh, his brother. His brother. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 30:46H. Foley?

  Sorry, buddy.

• 30:47Speaker 03

  Yeah. "Dude, I, I hit your car, bro."

• 30:51H. Foley?

  Are you at the point now with the car that, like, let's say you're in a grocery store parking lot, somebody backs into you, does, not serious damage, but does some pretty noticeable cosmetic damage-

• 31:05Speaker 01

  There's a crunch.

• 31:05H. Foley?

  To the quarter panel. Rear quarter panel. Do you say to them, and if they're like, "You can file a thing with my insurance," will you file the insurance claim and not get the car fixed, or take a cash offer?

• 31:18Speaker 03

  Uh, I would do a cash, um, but-

• 31:21H. Foley?

  You're not getting the car fixed.

• 31:22Speaker 01

  How far are you taking that? Where they go, "Oh my god, I'm so sorry. Do you want to exchange information?" Or what do you do?

• 31:27Speaker 03

  I would probably be at where I'm at with it now. I'd probably be like, "We're all good." It's been hit so many times-

• 31:31H. Foley?

  There's money on the table.

• 31:32Speaker 03

  Well, I got hit, like, it was like last year I got hit again, um, and it was a Lyft driver.

• 31:38Speaker 01

  A bad dog.

• 31:38Speaker 03

  And I felt bad. I felt bad. She crunched me bad, and I had to file a claim with that. And she's like, she's like, "You don't know what you're doing to me." I'm like, "You just hit me." I, I don't know, like, like, I don't know if her, her drive, you know, her Lyft was gonna be affected by her rating or whatever. But she had a passenger, a Lyft passenger in the back-

• 31:55H. Foley?

  You saw it?

• 31:56Speaker 03

  That wouldn't look at me. That was like, that was like, just looking straight forward. There was like, a witness that, like, she didn't want to look at me and, like, get involved at all, but she's just like, she's like, "I have to get this, like, person to their next destination." I was like, "Okay, well, let's just exchange information real quick."

• 32:09H. Foley?

  If I'm in an Uber and anything happens, I don't care, this happened yesterday where the guy got, the guy picked me up, and he couldn't get the parking brake off. It was a Suburban. Couldn't get the parking brake off.

• 32:21Speaker 03

  Ooh.

• 32:22H. Foley?

  And I said, "Alright," I walked around, I gave it two minutes, and I looked for it, couldn't, couldn't find the parking brake release.

• 32:28Speaker 01

  You were trying to help him?

• 32:29H. Foley?

  Yeah. He was, he was an Asian guy, and I don't think he spoke any English. I think he was covering for, you know, somebody. And I was like, "I'm out," but if there's anything, I am opening the door and walking away and saying, "Take care," I, I'm gonna cancel the ride.

• 32:41Speaker 01

  You're, yeah, to me, you're like a public, they're like, it's like a public bus driver.

• 32:45H. Foley?

  Yeah, you're on your own. That's the agreement we're in.

• 32:48Speaker 01

  There might as well be a wall between me and you.

• 32:49H. Foley?

  Yeah, that lady should've got out of the Uber and been like, "Yeah, fucked it."

• 32:52Speaker 03

  No, yeah. I'm surprised she didn't call another Uber. Like, be like, "Cancel it, call another Uber."

• 32:56Speaker 01

  They hit you?

• 32:57Speaker 03

  It was, it was like a main city area. Yeah, yeah.

• 33:00Speaker 01

  Ah, shit. Uh-

• 33:02H. Foley?

  What'd you get for that?

• 33:03Speaker 03

  That one Lyft was, they cheap skated me out. They only gave me like eight hundred bucks on that one.

• 33:08Speaker 01

  And you keep that eight hundred?

• 33:08Speaker 03

  Yeah, I just keep it. I just pocket it, baby.

• 33:10Speaker 01

  Sick.

• 33:10H. Foley?

  Sure.

• 33:11Speaker 03

  Every time. Every time I've been hit, I just pocket it. Yeah.

• 33:14Speaker 01

  Yeah. So what's the, what do you think, how much crunching's left on this car?

• 33:19Speaker 03

  There's-

• 33:19Speaker 01

  Are you like, you got another year, you think? Two year? You're gonna go, "I'm just gonna ride it till it's crunched out."

• 33:23Speaker 03

  It's low mileage, so I-

• 33:25Speaker 01

  How low?

• 33:26Speaker 03

  Seventy-eight thousand miles. On a Honda.

• 33:29H. Foley?

  Allegedly.

• 33:30Speaker 01

  What year?

• 33:31H. Foley?

  Yeah, it's true.

• 33:32Speaker 01

  What year?

• 33:32Speaker 03

  Two thousand twelve.

• 33:33Speaker 01

  That's not bad. That's actually, that's very low-

• 33:36Speaker 03

  It's a hybrid.

• 33:36H. Foley?

  Let me ask you this. Let's say the kids were in seventh grade, I know they're not, but let's say they were, that you had to be public with this car around their friends.

• 33:45Speaker 03

  Uh huh.

• 33:46H. Foley?

  Would you be comfortable driving them around in this?

• 33:49Speaker 03

  Well-

• 33:50H. Foley?

  Or do you know they'd take, like, "Come on, dad."

• 33:52Speaker 03

  I mean, I don't, I wouldn't care about that, because I pull into the-

• 33:55H. Foley?

  I know you wouldn't, but they would.

• 33:56Speaker 03

  I mean, I don't, I, I'm hopefully raising them in a way where they're like, they'll be able to blow it off.

• 34:01Speaker 01

  Dad, your car sucks.

• 34:02Speaker 03

  It'd be like, "Yeah, I know, alright." I, I put them in the back of it, uh, like, it's, so it's a hatchback?

• 34:08Speaker 01

  It's a hatchback with, it's a two-door. There's no backseat?

• 34:12Speaker 03

  No, there's no backseats.

• 34:13Speaker 01

  How do you put them in the back? Wait, there's no backseats?

• 34:15Speaker 03

  There's no backseats on this two-door. So what I do for fun with, what I do for fun with them is, I'll put on, uh, jock jams, I like to move it, I'll blare it, and then I'll put them in the back with no seatbelts on, and I'll do donuts around our neighborhood.

• 34:30Speaker 01

  So it's really just like that, right? Is that what it looks like? They're like quasi-seats?

• 34:35Speaker 03

  Yeah, they're not seats, though. There's no seatbelts.

• 34:36Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I, I see that.

• 34:38Speaker 03

  I fold every, I fold that section down, and so it's just a flat, like-

• 34:42Speaker 01

  Right, and it goes back to the trunk.

• 34:43Speaker 03

  And it goes like-

• 34:44Speaker 01

  That's a lot, that's like a pickup truck.

• 34:46H. Foley?

  Yeah, that's crazy. That's like one of the shuttles from, uh, Star Trek.

• 34:49Speaker 03

  Yep.

• 34:50Speaker 01

  That's wild.

• 34:50Speaker 03

  So I drive them around, and they love it because they, you know, it's like a free, uh, roller coaster, uh, for them.

• 34:56H. Foley?

  Alright. I give you that. You're slipping by there, Watkins.

• 35:01Speaker 01

  That's wild. Uh, if you're peeing at a urinal, do you put your hand on the wall ever?

• 35:05Speaker 03

  My son does.

• 35:07Speaker 01

  That guy's an old timer.

• 35:08Speaker 03

  He's five, and he's already putting his hand on the wall.

• 35:11H. Foley?

  How do you feel about a high top at a bar or restaurant? You sit at a high top?

• 35:15Speaker 03

  I prefer a booth, but I'll do a high top.

• 35:18H. Foley?

  You'll do it?

• 35:19Speaker 03

  I'll do it.

• 35:20H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 35:20Speaker 03

  Not first choice.

• 35:21Speaker 01

  You won't wreck it, you won't go, "Oh, we'll do the high top."

• 35:24Speaker 03

  No, no, no.

• 35:25H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 35:25Speaker 01

  I kinda like it.

• 35:26Speaker 03

  Do you?

• 35:27Speaker 01

  Cause you're in, you're out, you're kinda vibing.

• 35:28Speaker 03

  You know, like, committing fully?

• 35:29Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's loosey-goosey, but, ah, the server will come around again.

• 35:32Speaker 03

  You can dine and dash on the check if you really need to.

• 35:34H. Foley?

  He likes it cause he's close to the bar.

• 35:37Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 35:37Speaker 03

  Whoa.

• 35:38Speaker 01

  Someone's upset about that. Uh, grown up, who was the most famous person you met? And it doesn't have to be a huge celebrity, it could've been like a local celebrity, like, this guy was the weatherman, or a local, you know, whatever. Doesn't have to be anything. Just someone of notoriety where you're like, "Whoa, I met him at a signing," or a-

• 35:57H. Foley?

  This is gonna be weird.

• 35:58Speaker 01

  Opening of a supermarket or something.

• 36:00H. Foley?

  I think it's gonna be some, somebody from Sesame Street or something.

• 36:03Speaker 03

  No, uh, I'm trying to think from-

• 36:05H. Foley?

  Frank Oz or Jim Henson.

• 36:06Speaker 03

  There was a guy who, um-

• 36:10Speaker 01

  This is great, there was a guy who. It's not even, doesn't even have a name.

• 36:14Speaker 03

  No, he, uh, there was a weather guy who we met at the zoo one time. I remember that. That was a big deal.

• 36:18Speaker 01

  It's always at, they're always, what the fuck are they doing at the zoo?

• 36:21Speaker 03

  And then, uh, there was a, a baseball player, something Montgomery, uh, who played for the Royals. He was doing a signing at, at, uh, at our Price Chopper, which is like our local grocery store.

• 36:33Speaker 01

  Price Chopper sounds like a mixtape by Lil Wayne.

• 36:34H. Foley?

  That guy was definitely hung the fuck over.

• 36:36Speaker 03

  Yo, mula, baby.

• 36:38Speaker 01

  Price Chopper.

• 36:39Speaker 03

  Price Chopper. Pussy on the poppy, price on the choppin'.

• 36:43Speaker 01

  Jeff Montgomery?

• 36:44Speaker 03

  Get the sloppa sloppa.

• 36:45H. Foley?

  Jeff Montgomery.

• 36:46Speaker 03

  Jeff Montgomery. Yeah. Yeah, I met him at a Price Chopper. And then I met, uh-

• 36:51Speaker 01

  Those are pretty good. Those are standard dirtbag meetings.

• 36:53Speaker 03

  I met at a soccer camp, uh, some of the, uh, former Kansas City Attack players and the Wizard players from back in the day.

• 37:01Speaker 01

  Who were the Kansas City Attack, though?

• 37:02Speaker 03

  They were an indoor soccer team.

• 37:04Speaker 01

  I remember, cause we had the Philadelphia Freedom.

• 37:05Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 37:06Speaker 01

  One of my cousins played.

• 37:07Speaker 03

  Oh, really?

• 37:09Speaker 01

  Played at the Spectrum, I believe.

• 37:10Speaker 03

  Mm-hmm.

• 37:11Speaker 01

  Oh, I've got some family on the Spectrum. That's a great joke.

• 37:16H. Foley?

  Remember the Philly Wings?

• 37:18Speaker 01

  The Philly Wings, and then, uh, yeah, the Philadelphia Soul, uh, owned by Bon Jovi, was the arena football league.

• 37:24H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 37:25Speaker 03

  Really?

• 37:25H. Foley?

  Uh-huh.

• 37:26Speaker 03

  Did he play his soundtrack before every game?

• 37:29Speaker 01

  He played quarterback, actually.

• 37:31Speaker 02

  We gotta hold on to what we got.

• 37:36H. Foley?

  Running back Richie Sambora, ladies and gentlemen.

• 37:40Speaker 01

  This kid's clotheslined.

• 37:43Speaker 02

  You get it, love.

• 37:46Speaker 01

  Uh, that's a good frickin' time there, Jerry.

• 37:50H. Foley?

  Kim, it's time about Wayfair.

• 37:51Speaker 01

  Wayfair.

• 37:52H. Foley?

  Now, as you know, I've been a, been, I've had, I've had an apartment before.

• 37:56Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 37:57H. Foley?

  And I tell you what, you know what I furnished that with?

• 37:58Speaker 01

  What?

• 37:59H. Foley?

  Wayfair.

• 38:00Speaker 01

  Yeah. Nice stuff.

• 38:01H. Foley?

  There, there, there's some guy sleeping on the couch that I bought from Wayfair, probably right now. And God love him, it's fine.

• 38:07Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 38:07H. Foley?

  Fantastic couch. Bought it five years ago, still, still rock solid.

• 38:12Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 38:12H. Foley?

  Best nap I ever took.

• 38:14Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 38:14H. Foley?

  I hope he's doing well.

• 38:15Speaker 01

  Listen, uh, all jokes aside from the big man, obviously, for comedy purposes, uh, Wayfair is fantastic, uh, that's how I, I helped furnish any apartment I lived in in the past, however many years.

• 38:29H. Foley?

  First stop, Wayfair.

• 38:30Speaker 01

  Everything's Wayfair. You get, uh, you get a good alignment of what's out there. You get some, some more affordable options, you get some middle-of-the-road options, you get some nicer options, whether you're refreshing a room, replacing something worn out, or upgrading an appliance, or giving your home a festive flair for the holidays. Listen, we, we, we upgraded from a one-bedroom to a two-bedroom. We needed to get a whole new thing. I said, "Babe, go to Wayfair," boom dresser, boom bed, boom nightstand, boom light, out the door. Uh, every single style and budget, got shopped, thousands of products across every style and budget, uh, use filters, custom photos, and, uh, they have over twenty million verified five-star reviews, so you can confidently find the right fit for your home. User-sourced, user-generated. That's what we're talking about.

• 39:12Speaker 01

  Find pieces made for real life and get even more value with Wayfair Rewards. Join Wayfair Rewards today to get five percent back on every purchase. Head to wayfair.com to shop all things home. That's wayfair, W-A-Y-F-A-I-R dot com. Do it.

• 39:27H. Foley?

  Do it.

• 39:28Speaker 05

  Wayfair, every style, every home.

• 39:31H. Foley?

  Kim, it's time about Chime.

• 39:32Speaker 01

  Chime.

• 39:33H. Foley?

  As you know, baby, life comes at you pretty quick.

• 39:36Speaker 01

  You ain't lying, big man.

• 39:37H. Foley?

  Things start adding up.

• 39:38Speaker 01

  Uh-huh.

• 39:38H. Foley?

  You know what I'm saying? I wish I could go back and tell my younger self, if you're gonna do a little banking, make sure you save your money, make sure you do it right, watch out for bank fees, all that kinda stuff. I'll tell you what I really wish, I could go back and say, "Hey, I wish I had Chime."

• 39:53Speaker 01

  I know. Listen, if, if you're out there, this is where Chime comes in. Chime is changing the way people bank. It's hard, listen, it's hard enough to keep a buck as it is. Then you got these big corporate banks coming after you.

• 40:05H. Foley?

  Overdraft fees.

• 40:06Speaker 01

  Overdraft fee, uh, monthly statement, that, oh, oh, five, five dollars for this, ten dollars for that. They got their hand in your pocket.

• 40:13Speaker 03

  Mm-hmm.

• 40:13Speaker 01

  Not with Chime. Chime offers the most rewarding fee-free banking, all with no overdraft fees, no monthly fees, no minimum balances. You get five percent cash back on the Chime card in a category of your choice, like gas or groceries, all while building credit through regular, everyday spending. And if you're ever in a pinch, SpotMe lets you overdraft up to two hundred dollars fee-free. Look at that. I know, I need that, dog. Uh, right now, you can join the millions that are already banking fee-free with America's number one choice for banking. Head to chime.com/garbage. That's chime.com/garbage. Sign up now, it only takes a few minutes.

• 40:47H. Foley?

  Do it.

• 40:48Speaker 05

  Chime is a fintech, not a bank. Banking services and Chime Card provided by Chime's bank partners. Qualifying direct deposits required. Terms and limits apply. Go to chime.com/disclosures for details.

• 41:00H. Foley?

  Jeremiah Watkins, will you steal a steak knife from a steakhouse?

• 41:06Speaker 03

  Will I what?

• 41:07H. Foley?

  Steal a steak knife from a steakhouse. Have you ever taken a steak knife from a steakhouse?

• 41:10Speaker 03

  Ooh, I've helped my mom steal stuff from Olive Garden. And Red Lobster.

• 41:16Speaker 01

  Like what?

• 41:16Speaker 03

  My mom has a thing.

• 41:18Speaker 01

  She's a kleptomaniac. That's a bit of a condemned criminal.

• 41:21Speaker 03

  Uh, the biggest thing that we ever stole was, uh, a potted plant from Olive Garden.

• 41:27Speaker 01

  That's pretty big dude.

• 41:29Speaker 03

  It was huge.

• 41:29Speaker 01

  It was huge.

• 41:30Speaker 03

  It was huge.

• 41:31Speaker 01

  Like by the door or whatever.

• 41:32Speaker 03

  It took two people to carry it.

• 41:33Speaker 01

  Where was it?

• 41:35Speaker 03

  Uh, it was an Olive Garden in Kansas City and uh, we put it in the trunk. Like it was that big, it couldn't fit like, like it was literally like this size.

• 41:43Speaker 01

  Where in the restaurant?

• 41:44Speaker 03

  Uh, near the entrance. You can't take it.

• 41:45Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 41:46Speaker 03

  Yeah, you can't, you can't like carry it all the way through. Through the kitchen.

• 41:49Speaker 01

  Don't mind me. Brought this from home.

• 41:50Speaker 03

  We're from corporate. My mom also has uh, taken full uh, glasses of beer out of restaurants and just put a napkin over it and just walked out with it.

• 41:59H. Foley?

  For the glass, not the beer.

• 42:00Speaker 03

  Yeah, well, probably.

• 42:01H. Foley?

  Put a little bit of both.

• 42:02Speaker 03

  Yeah, a little column A, a little column B.

• 42:04H. Foley?

  Uh, listen, a, a glass that you like, I'll give you. Steak knife, yes, because of the novelty, you know, when the big steak knives came out.

• 42:12Speaker 03

  Yeah. I've taken chopsticks more recently.

• 42:15Speaker 01

  That's fun.

• 42:15H. Foley?

  Wooden ones or like the?

• 42:17Speaker 03

  Yeah, they're nice wood. Uh, like they're, they're nice like, you know.

• 42:20H. Foley?

  See, I don't like those.

• 42:20Speaker 03

  They're like painted, they're nice.

• 42:22H. Foley?

  Yeah. You ever use the metal ones?

• 42:24Speaker 03

  I don't like the metal ones.

• 42:25H. Foley?

  Me neither.

• 42:26Speaker 03

  No, there's something about the taste.

• 42:27H. Foley?

  It's like doing surgery.

• 42:28Speaker 03

  Like wo- yeah, yeah, yeah. It feels like Operation but Asian style.

• 42:32H. Foley?

  Feel good using chopsticks.

• 42:33Speaker 01

  I was gonna make a really bad joke and we're gonna move on. Uh, okay. Uh, do you own any DVDs still?

• 42:41Speaker 03

  Yeah, I just bought some.

• 42:42Speaker 01

  Are they on display in the house?

• 42:44Speaker 03

  They're not on display, they're in a closet.

• 42:46Speaker 01

  What in the Y3K bunker? What?

• 42:52H. Foley?

  Next to the gallon drum of pickles.

• 42:54Speaker 01

  What, what DVDs were they?

• 42:56Speaker 03

  Uh, Puss in Boots, uh...

• 42:58Speaker 01

  This guy's a freak.

• 42:59H. Foley?

  For the kids?

• 43:00Speaker 03

  For the kids, yeah. Uh, we've got like some childhood classic kinda movies and stuff like that, uh, that we still have.

• 43:07Speaker 01

  For what's the purpose to just like, for like more?

• 43:09Speaker 03

  More so just so we don't have to scroll looking. It's like, we'll, we'll do-

• 43:14Speaker 01

  Hey, we're gonna put this in, it's the activity.

• 43:15Speaker 03

  We'll make like a, we, we'll make like our own Blockbuster at home.

• 43:19Speaker 01

  Fun.

• 43:20Speaker 03

  Where we'll put out like a bunch of DVDs and we're like, hey boys, pick one. You don't have, you don't, you're not scrolling, you pick one right in front of you, settled. You have to agree on it, like, like we used to back in the day and just do it.

• 43:32Speaker 01

  That's great, that just, that just, I like, that's really cool.

• 43:35Speaker 03

  I do this other thing with my son that, there's like a throwback that's fun, he's obsessed with Pokemon cards. And what I do, I have this glass uh, fish tank uh, aquarium that I used to use on podcasts for Scissor Bros. I used to like throw up in it and we'd like bob for disgusting things in there and stuff.

• 43:50Speaker 01

  Yeah, why not get a new one?

• 43:51Speaker 03

  Yeah, no, I cleaned it out, I cleaned it out. Uh, flipped over the uh, the, the square fish aquarium and I put new Pokemon cards in there. And he has to come, it's called Dad Has Pokemon Store, and he has to come and trade me. I'm like, I'm like, what do you got? So I don't, I don't give, I just don't straight up give him new packs, he has to trade me for the new cards.

• 44:10Speaker 01

  That's sick.

• 44:11H. Foley?

  Are you doing the voices and all that stuff with, with, with the kids?

• 44:14Speaker 03

  Oh yeah, whatever they want, like as far as like, like me doing characters or voices that they request, I'm doing it for them.

• 44:20Speaker 01

  Can you just be Dad for once?

• 44:22Speaker 03

  Yeah. And I just look at him like-

• 44:25Speaker 01

  Just be Jeremiah, gee.

• 44:28Speaker 01

  Charmander, char, char.

• 44:31Speaker 03

  Oh my god. Squidle, squidle. Come on Pikachu.

• 44:37H. Foley?

  That's funny. Can you just be Dad for once?

• 44:40Speaker 03

  I just wanna talk to Dad, I mean, literally, I've been rea- I was reading bedtime stories of my son, he's like, can you just do it as Dad?

• 44:47H. Foley?

  Oh my god.

• 44:48Speaker 01

  My wife goes, I don't think our son's gonna know what your real voice is.

• 44:51Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah.

• 44:52Speaker 01

  I'm all over the place. Yeah, and that, cause I, I mean, I made that joke cause it hit me recently, I'm like, I am just really doing-

• 44:58H. Foley?

  I never thought of that.

• 44:59Speaker 03

  Cause I'll read bedtime-

• 45:00Speaker 01

  He loves my Asian voice, it's queen.

• 45:02Speaker 03

  Really?

• 45:05H. Foley?

  God, I never thought about it like that.

• 45:07Speaker 03

  Yeah, I'll do like all-

• 45:08Speaker 01

  And I'm not even good at voices.

• 45:09Speaker 03

  I'll read bedtime stories as like Gandalf from Lord of the Rings and different things and, yeah. Long, long time.

• 45:15Speaker 01

  That's fun. He gets them laughing.

• 45:17H. Foley?

  Do it as Jigsaw, scared as shit out of him.

• 45:18Speaker 03

  Yeah. I wanna play a game. Give me your Pokemon cards. What, what will you give me?

• 45:26H. Foley?

  To save your brother's life.

• 45:28Speaker 01

  They're handcuffed to each other, what the fuck?

• 45:33Speaker 03

  Start the CRZ now. I will burn this Charizard right in front of you.

• 45:40H. Foley?

  Ah, it's good stuff.

• 45:41Speaker 01

  Ah, man. What were we talking about? Okay.

• 45:46Speaker 03

  Uh, DVDs.

• 45:47Speaker 01

  Yes, that's awesome, I really wanna do that, that's really cool, that's fun.

• 45:50H. Foley?

  And it keeps them from scrolling, that's kinda the thing.

• 45:52Speaker 01

  Well, it's like, it's, there's a, to get back to analog a little bit is nice.

• 45:56Speaker 03

  It's more, also just so my wife and I don't have to be like, what about this, what about this? It's literally, they see it right in front of them and they know that these are the parameters. These are the eight movies or whatever that we have.

• 46:06Speaker 01

  There's not a million other choices.

• 46:07Speaker 03

  Right, right.

• 46:07Speaker 01

  And there's also a thing too of like, we don't really, I, my kid's significantly younger, but we don't really show uh... He doesn't really watch TV, but we were stuck in the house cause of the weather the last weekend, so we were like, alright, we got, you gotta lean on something. I'm like, this is crazy, it's like you can't distract him in a fucking, in an apartment. So uh, you choose something and then it's like, he already knows now where it's like, oh, there's something else. He's like, alright, I'm done with this, like put all, you know, it's like, and you go like- Oh, this is just never ending episodes of Clifford the Big Red Dog or fucking Franklin, you're like, oh, but if he can be like, this is what it is.

• 46:41Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 46:42Speaker 01

  That's it.

• 46:42Speaker 03

  I'm slow rolling introducing him to video games, he loves video games, but I have like one of those emulators that have thousands of games on them. And I'm only like, I'm slow rolling it where like, I'm like, these are the games that I have. Like, don't like, and then I've, I have Game Boy Advance games that are like cartridges and I'm slowly-

• 46:59Speaker 01

  It's cool.

• 47:00Speaker 03

  Especially he's not like, new one, new one, new one, new one. Yeah.

• 47:03H. Foley?

  In the last 365 days, have you pushed the automated toilet button? Have you had to do that?

• 47:09Speaker 03

  Yeah, of course.

• 47:10H. Foley?

  You have?

• 47:11Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 47:12Speaker 01

  You don't do that, I take it?

• 47:13Speaker 03

  You don't press the, like, on the flush? Like-

• 47:18H. Foley?

  Like the one that has the sensor and supposed to flush?

• 47:20Speaker 03

  Yeah, it's supposed to, but sometimes it doesn't.

• 47:23H. Foley?

  That's, I don't work there.

• 47:26H. Foley?

  I'm not touching that little button.

• 47:28Speaker 01

  It depends, if I'm at like a rest stop, probably not.

• 47:31Speaker 03

  That's crazy to leave a dump in a toilet.

• 47:33H. Foley?

  No, not a dump.

• 47:34Speaker 03

  I'd be like, I don't work here.

• 47:36H. Foley?

  It's never encountered, that's never happened, but peeing, I turn around, I walk away.

• 47:41Speaker 01

  It, I see what you're saying, it depends on what the rest of the, the ba- it depends on the state of the bathroom.

• 47:48Speaker 03

  How you found it in?

• 47:49Speaker 01

  Yeah, if I go in there and there's like, it's, it's a fucking mess and there's, if it's like a fucking rest stop on the Jersey Turnpike. Ah, that, that is what it is.

• 47:57Speaker 03

  If I'm peeing on top of somebody's pee- Yeah, if I'm peeing on pee, then, you know.

• 48:02Speaker 01

  Great way.

• 48:02H. Foley?

  I've never encountered with a, with a number two, but I don't know.

• 48:07Speaker 01

  You got, yeah, you gotta.

• 48:09H. Foley?

  I don't know.

• 48:10Speaker 01

  This is what you do, you don't use your, you don't use the point of your finger, you use your knuckle and, and you're out of there.

• 48:14H. Foley?

  Cause it's so tiny.

• 48:15Speaker 01

  I know, that's why you use your, use, use your middle finger knuckle.

• 48:18Speaker 03

  I use my foot.

• 48:19Speaker 01

  To get there, yeah.

• 48:20H. Foley?

  You got long toes.

• 48:21Speaker 01

  Little ballerina toes.

• 48:23H. Foley?

  Okay, I'm a piece of shit.

• 48:26H. Foley?

  Dad?

• 48:26Speaker 01

  Um, hmm.

• 48:28Speaker 03

  I took uh, bowling, this reminded me of, I took bowling in college with uh, my sister. And that was our physical education credit. And uh, I remember, uh, I, I forget the alter-

• 48:39Speaker 01

  Did you have to go somewhere?

• 48:40H. Foley?

  I'm sorry.

• 48:40Speaker 03

  You had to go to the bowling alley.

• 48:41H. Foley?

  I'm sorry, you and your sister went to college together?

• 48:43Speaker 03

  Uh, for the first uh, year.

• 48:46H. Foley?

  Do we know that?

• 48:47Speaker 03

  She, no, she, she-

• 48:48Speaker 01

  I never told anybody, breaking news.

• 48:51Speaker 03

  She uh, graduated high school early, so she had a year where I was getting done with community college and she was entering community college, so we took uh, public-

• 49:01Speaker 01

  Oh, this is community college?

• 49:03Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 49:03Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 49:04H. Foley?

  What do you think they were doing bowling at Yale?

• 49:06Speaker 01

  I, I mean, I think they have that.

• 49:10Speaker 03

  Yeah, I mean, I wa- so we took multiple classes together, we took photography, bowling, public speaking, uh, I think that was-

• 49:19H. Foley?

  Holy shit.

• 49:20Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 49:21H. Foley?

  There's no, oh my god.

• 49:22Speaker 03

  Yeah, the uh-

• 49:23H. Foley?

  College with your sister.

• 49:25Speaker 03

  The public speaking-

• 49:26Speaker 01

  Did you guys, were you living at home?

• 49:27Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 49:28Speaker 01

  And you were driving the car, what car, yeah, you were-

• 49:30Speaker 03

  Uh, that was a different car at the time.

• 49:31Speaker 01

  What car was that, do you remember?

• 49:32Speaker 03

  That was a uh, 98 Acura CL.

• 49:36H. Foley?

  Alright, an Acura.

• 49:38Speaker 03

  That was a nice car.

• 49:38H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 49:39Speaker 03

  That was a nice car. Had leather interior.

• 49:41Speaker 01

  Act, listen, Acura's a very nice car.

• 49:43H. Foley?

  Very nice.

• 49:44Speaker 01

  They are the car for the dirtbag. That is like, got the Acura, you know what I mean?

• 49:49Speaker 03

  Oh no, it was a big deal.

• 49:50Speaker 01

  Leather seats, yeah, yeah, it's, it's always-

• 49:52H. Foley?

  What is Acura, Japanese?

• 49:54Speaker 03

  Honda.

• 49:54Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's the, it's the higher end Honda.

• 49:56H. Foley?

  I didn't know that.

• 49:57Speaker 03

  Uh huh.

• 49:57Speaker 01

  And Lexus's Toyota, yeah, and something else.

• 50:00H. Foley?

  Honda engines, big business, right Luke?

• 50:05Speaker 01

  Uh, what, what is, good, to go back to your uh, car, the CRZ?

• 50:11Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 50:11Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 50:14Speaker 01

  What, what is the radio, what is a carrying sound system in that? 2002, like, is there an aux cord? Is it?

• 50:21Speaker 03

  Oh, I use an aux cord.

• 50:22Speaker 01

  You use an aux cord?

• 50:23Speaker 03

  There's a CD player that, uh, I listen, I've been listening to Enya on recently.

• 50:28Speaker 01

  Really?

• 50:29Speaker 03

  Bumping it, dude.

• 50:30Speaker 01

  Do you have like a book of CDs in there, or do you just leave that in there?

• 50:32Speaker 03

  I have different sleeves that are in the, like, the side doors. I don't have a full book, but...

• 50:36Speaker 01

  Like, the CDs that would go with like the...

• 50:37H. Foley?

  Are you serious?

• 50:38Speaker 03

  Yeah, I still got CDs that are scattered through that car. So I've got like, I've got some different comedy albums in there.

• 50:44Speaker 01

  That's fun.

• 50:44H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 50:44Speaker 03

  I've got some, uh, I just bought the Enya one, though. That was not...

• 50:49H. Foley?

  Where did you buy it?

• 50:50Speaker 03

  On Amazon. Brand new. Came in the cellophane wrapping.

• 50:53Speaker 01

  What's that set you back?

• 50:54Speaker 03

  Uh, $10.

• 50:55Speaker 01

  That seems high.

• 50:56Speaker 03

  It was a steal.

• 50:57H. Foley?

  It seems very high.

• 50:57Speaker 03

  It was a steal. There's like, there's like 20 songs on there. That's a steal.

• 51:01H. Foley?

  An Enya CD?

• 51:02Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 51:03H. Foley?

  What was that broad's deal?

• 51:04Speaker 03

  What do you mean?

• 51:05H. Foley?

  I don't know.

• 51:06Speaker 03

  That's a queen you're talking about. Easy with Enya.

• 51:08H. Foley?

  Is she Irish?

• 51:09Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 51:10H. Foley?

  Huh.

• 51:10Speaker 01

  Uh-huh. I, I gotta be honest with you. I thought she was African.

• 51:13H. Foley?

  Oh, that kinda stuff?

• 51:14Speaker 03

  Really? No.

• 51:15Speaker 01

  Kenya? I swear to God.

• 51:16Speaker 03

  The whitest of white. The whitest of white.

• 51:17Speaker 01

  That's crazy.

• 51:18Speaker 03

  You're thinking of Kenya, bro. You're thinking of Kenya.

• 51:20Speaker 01

  Kind of, I guess. And then you were like, "She's a queen." I was like, "Yeah, she is, brother." You know what I mean?

• 51:24H. Foley?

  I know you're lying.

• 51:24Speaker 01

  That's my African queen. You know what I mean?

• 51:26H. Foley?

  Huh.

• 51:27Speaker 01

  Wow. Okay, did not know that.

• 51:29Speaker 03

  Yep.

• 51:30H. Foley?

  Do you have any pictures with any exotic animals? Koala?

• 51:33Speaker 01

  Snake?

• 51:34Speaker 03

  Uh, I've got koala pictures, but that's when I went to Australia. Yeah.

• 51:38H. Foley?

  Okay, that's, that'd be weird if it was Detroit.

• 51:40Speaker 03

  I have handled snakes before, but it's usually comedy, comedy-related, uh, uh, events. We were just in Australia. Uh, for Dr. Phil Live in Australia, there was a pretty scary snake that I had to hold around my neck for a bit. And it was, uh, kinda terrifying.

• 51:58H. Foley?

  He did that in Australia?

• 51:59Speaker 03

  Yeah, we did that.

• 52:00H. Foley?

  How big was the theater?

• 52:02Speaker 03

  Uh, a couple thousand.

• 52:03Speaker 01

  It's crazy.

• 52:03H. Foley?

  God damn.

• 52:04Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 52:05H. Foley?

  Shout out to you, boys.

• 52:05Speaker 03

  Yeah. No, it was awesome. It was very cool.

• 52:07H. Foley?

  Love him and love you, I tell you.

• 52:09Speaker 03

  No, it was wild.

• 52:10H. Foley?

  Dr. Phil.

• 52:10Speaker 01

  Have I gone...

• 52:11Speaker 03

  I had a lot of turtles as a kid. I was more of a turtle kid.

• 52:14Speaker 01

  What's a lot?

• 52:16Speaker 03

  I had five at once.

• 52:17Speaker 01

  That's too many.

• 52:18Speaker 03

  I had five at once.

• 52:19Speaker 01

  I had a turtle. That's too many turtles.

• 52:20H. Foley?

  Ew. What'd that smell, what'd your room smell like?

• 52:22Speaker 03

  Uh, I kept them, I had to keep them in the garage and then also, uh, outside because, and I used to keep them in a dog kennel.

• 52:31H. Foley?

  Five turtles?

• 52:32Speaker 01

  Like box turtles?

• 52:33Speaker 03

  Box turtles, wood turtles. There's a red-eared slider that I had.

• 52:36Speaker 01

  Oh, what? I mean, oh, a what?

• 52:38Speaker 03

  A red-eared slider.

• 52:39H. Foley?

  Can you keep different turtles in the same pen?

• 52:42Speaker 03

  Uh, I did. I don't know if you should. I don't know if you should.

• 52:47H. Foley?

  Turtles freak me out a little bit.

• 52:49Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 52:50H. Foley?

  I like the cartoon ones.

• 52:51Speaker 01

  Red-eared slider.

• 52:52Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 52:52H. Foley?

  More so than the real ones.

• 52:53Speaker 03

  So that one, the one that I had was, was giant. He was this big for the red-eared slider that I had.

• 52:59Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 52:59Speaker 03

  But one of them I had was so small that it fit through the crack of, uh, we had a, uh, our deck and I thought it was enclosed, but, uh, he snuck through the, uh, the boards and got out.

• 53:09H. Foley?

  Where'd he go?

• 53:09Speaker 03

  And, uh, into the creek. There was like a 20-foot drop down.

• 53:13H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 53:13Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 53:14H. Foley?

  So he was okay?

• 53:14Speaker 03

  Yeah, I think he was okay.

• 53:15H. Foley?

  But then the winter came and...

• 53:17Speaker 03

  I don't know what the...

• 53:18Speaker 01

  They hibernate.

• 53:18Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 53:19Speaker 01

  They may, they probably, they make it through the winter.

• 53:21H. Foley?

  You think?

• 53:21Speaker 01

  Turtle, two turtles can live like 100 years.

• 53:23H. Foley?

  Yeah, but that one from a pet store, a slider, maybe he was like Colombian or something.

• 53:27Speaker 03

  Nate Bargatze, uh, told me...

• 53:29H. Foley?

  Alligator.

• 53:30Speaker 03

  That, uh, he, he's like, he's like, he's like, "You know you're, uh, you're in one of my jokes, right?" And I was like, "Really?" And he, I go, "Which one?" He goes, "I have a joke about a turtle." And this was at Salvocano's, uh, wedding.

• 53:45Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 53:46Speaker 03

  And, uh, he, he looked at me and he goes, "Man, that, that turtle must be pretty cold in that water." And I was like, "Well, they're cold-blooded, so they don't..." That's not, it's not cold to them," he goes. And he, he does this bit about like how he feels, how dumb I made him feel.

• 54:00Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 54:00Speaker 03

  And he's like, "I never talked to him again."

• 54:04H. Foley?

  That's wild. Five turtles.

• 54:06Speaker 03

  Five turtles. Uh, I mean, one of them was, uh, one-eyed Willie. He had one eye, uh, scratched out by some kind of animal.

• 54:15H. Foley?

  What the, where do you get these?

• 54:17Speaker 03

  Huh? I mean, they were, they, in the woods in Kansas. Work release.

• 54:21H. Foley?

  Would you get them at the pet store?

• 54:22Speaker 03

  No. All wild. All wild turtles. I never got like any of my, my childhood, we'd give them like, we'd be...

• 54:28H. Foley?

  That's wild-caught ghippie.

• 54:30Speaker 03

  We would be...

• 54:30H. Foley?

  None of that farm factory shit.

• 54:32Speaker 03

  Shooting guns out in the woods or fishing somewhere, like out near creeks or like little ponds or lakes or whatever, and then there would always be a turtle around and I'd be like, "Yeah, can I take it home?" He's like, "Yeah, all right." And then, so, I had five at once that I collected from different places.

• 54:46H. Foley?

  That's crazy.

• 54:47Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 54:47Speaker 01

  Hmm.

• 54:48H. Foley?

  God love you.

• 54:49Speaker 03

  Yeah, but it smelled awful.

• 54:50Speaker 01

  Yeah, they do, they do.

• 54:51Speaker 03

  Turtle pee smells so bad.

• 54:53Speaker 01

  I can still smell mine.

• 54:54Speaker 03

  Oh, dude, it's, it's such a specific smell.

• 54:57Speaker 01

  35 years again.

• 54:57Speaker 03

  It's gnarly.

• 54:58Speaker 01

  Imprinted in your brain.

• 54:59Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 55:00Speaker 01

  Uh, go over to your house now. Where is the trash can? Can I see it? Where is it?

• 55:06Speaker 03

  Uh, it's out, but it's on the other side. We have like a, a center, like island kinda of a thing.

• 55:10Speaker 01

  And it's on the end of that.

• 55:11Speaker 03

  It's on the end of that.

• 55:12H. Foley?

  Is there a lock on it?

• 55:13Speaker 03

  Yeah. Uh, no, it's a step. It's a step. Trash can. Yeah, you put your foot on it.

• 55:18H. Foley?

  Still working good?

• 55:19Speaker 03

  Still works pretty good. Yeah.

• 55:21H. Foley?

  You ever pop the top off with the step?

• 55:24Speaker 03

  Uh, no, but sometimes it jams a little bit. You gotta wiggle a little bit.

• 55:28Speaker 01

  A wiggle?

• 55:29Speaker 03

  You gotta wiggle a bit. Yeah, you gotta wiggle a bit.

• 55:32H. Foley?

  Hmm. Luke, you got that at your house?

• 55:34Speaker 04

  It's hidden underneath.

• 55:35H. Foley?

  Uh-huh.

• 55:35Speaker 04

  That's just lucky.

• 55:36Speaker 03

  Before I forget, because this is pretty gross, uh, I don't, and I still forget what the altercation was. Uh, when I was doing...

• 55:43Speaker 01

  I fought Nate Bargatze.

• 55:46Speaker 03

  When, when I was doing the bowling, uh, class with my sister...

• 55:50Speaker 01

  We got off on a tangent.

• 55:52Speaker 03

  That would be for, for dumbness, but, uh, whatever. Uh, she got into some altercation with somebody at the front that was like, like being like very aggressive and like mean to her.

• 56:01Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 56:01Speaker 03

  Um, and she took a dump on top of the lid of the toilet in the bowling...

• 56:07Speaker 01

  On top of the lid, like upper decked it but didn't open it up?

• 56:10Speaker 03

  Yeah, she put it on...

• 56:11Speaker 01

  That's crazy. I don't even know.

• 56:12Speaker 03

  She put it like on the top of the lid. Like she pooped on top of the lid of the toilet.

• 56:19H. Foley?

  You guys are bitching to me about not pushing the button.

• 56:22Speaker 01

  Yeah, I mean, that's crazy.

• 56:24Speaker 04

  That's like an athletic feat, though.

• 56:25Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 56:26Speaker 04

  That's good quad strength.

• 56:27Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 56:27Speaker 04

  To stay up like that.

• 56:28Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah.

• 56:29H. Foley?

  Whoa, she must have really been mad.

• 56:30Speaker 03

  Yeah, she smeared it on there. It was gross.

• 56:33Speaker 01

  How was it, Turkey? I tell you.

• 56:37Speaker 01

  Well, stupidest joke I've ever made in my life. Luke, cut that. Send it to me.

• 56:41H. Foley?

  Are they starters or appetizers?

• 56:45Speaker 03

  Uh, appetizers.

• 56:46H. Foley?

  Hmm, what a prize.

• 56:48Speaker 01

  I got a question for you. When you're at a restaurant and, you know, there's something on the menu that you might not fully understand what it is, like you're an Italian or something, will you Google it or just go, "That's not for me"?

• 56:59Speaker 03

  Uh, I either said, "That's not for me," or I asked the, the waiter or waitress, I go, "What is that?"

• 57:03Speaker 01

  What is that? That's a chicken tender, sir.

• 57:07Speaker 03

  But how do you, how do you cook that?

• 57:09Speaker 01

  Do the chickens really have fingers?

• 57:11Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 57:11H. Foley?

  How tender is this chicken you speak of?

• 57:14Speaker 01

  Okay. All right. I Google a lot of stuff.

• 57:17Speaker 03

  Do you?

• 57:17Speaker 01

  Yeah, I find myself to.

• 57:18Speaker 03

  You too embarrassed, uh...

• 57:19Speaker 01

  Well, one, it's too embarrassed. I've talked about this before, but like my, cause my wife will ask me questions cause like, English isn't her first language, so it's like, well, she'll be like, "What is this?" And it's like, eh, it's like, I have to explain a lot of things I never thought I've, you just kind of assume.

• 57:34Speaker 03

  Right. You're like, "Oh, you don't know what that is."

• 57:36Speaker 01

  And I'm like, "I don't, I guess, I don't, I can, I don't, I guess, I don't really know what it is," type thing. So like, I end up... A lot of Googling. And plus, I'm an idiot.

• 57:43Speaker 03

  Uh, you'll love this. My, uh, my wife made fish tacos the other night and I'm like, "Oh, okay, cool."

• 57:48Speaker 01

  What kind of fish, though?

• 57:49Speaker 03

  Yeah. Dude?

• 57:50Speaker 01

  I knew it.

• 57:51Speaker 03

  It was fish sticks in tacos.

• 57:53Speaker 01

  Oh my God. Where is she from?

• 57:56Speaker 03

  She called them, but she's from the Bay Area. She called them fish tacos and I go...

• 57:59Speaker 01

  That's like, well, that's like a food hub of the world.

• 58:01Speaker 03

  I know. And I'm like, "You know these are fish stick tacos?" She goes, "Don't call them that." I go, "What else am I gonna call them? They're not fish tacos. Fish tacos is something entirely different."

• 58:11Speaker 01

  That's crazy.

• 58:12Speaker 03

  I mean, they were delicious, but...

• 58:13H. Foley?

  Yeah, I was gonna say, I gotta push back on that.

• 58:16Speaker 01

  That's not a fish taco.

• 58:17Speaker 03

  You think that's a fish taco?

• 58:18Speaker 01

  You can't say, "I made fish tacos."

• 58:20H. Foley?

  I think a fish, okay, first of all, a fish stick, frozen fish stick has more flavor than like a piece of fish that's fried. Like a simple, a lot of times, listen, a lot of times, fish tacos miss because there's no flavor in the fried fish.

• 58:38Speaker 03

  Cause there's no stick in it.

• 58:40H. Foley?

  Right. The stick, whatever that is.

• 58:43Speaker 01

  It's the breading, right?

• 58:44H. Foley?

  I don't know. It's something, they juice the, they, they do something with the fish, which is not really fish, in, inside of it. It has, it has a vibe to it.

• 58:52Speaker 03

  I want you to be, uh, to do the 20 versus one, uh, thing where you, you in the center.

• 58:57Speaker 01

  Ding. I'm H. Foley.

• 58:59H. Foley?

  Well, here's the thing. A fish taco should be like tuna or salmon, like real fish. So it's so far the other way.

• 59:08Speaker 01

  It do, listen.

• 59:09H. Foley?

  What else was on there?

• 59:09Speaker 01

  I'm not saying it's, no one's saying it's not good or packs a punch flavor-wise.

• 59:13Speaker 03

  Yeah, no, it was great.

• 59:14Speaker 01

  You can't say, "I made fish taco," dude. Dude, if I was to come over to my house for dinner and then I rolled that out, you'd fucking have me committed.

• 59:22H. Foley?

  What time should I be there?

• 59:24Speaker 01

  Uh, yeah, that's not fish tacos. You have to say, "Babe, I wrapped fish sticks in tortilla and we're gonna have dinner."

• 59:30H. Foley?

  Why was she so against fish stick tacos? It rolls off the tongue. I think it's actually pretty nice.

• 59:34Speaker 03

  Because I...

• 59:34H. Foley?

  Fish stick tacos?

• 59:35Speaker 03

  Because I think that she wanted it to, to sound like that she made fish tacos and not, and not fish stick tacos.

• 59:42H. Foley?

  What else is she doing on there?

• 59:43Speaker 03

  Uh, cheese and then she made the tortillas like in the, in the pan. Like she like cooked them and like, and like some kinda oil.

• 59:50H. Foley?

  Is it just cheese and the fish?

• 59:51Speaker 03

  Just cheese and fish. And I put some habanero on it and...

• 59:54H. Foley?

  That's weird. No lettuce, tomato, no?

• 59:56Speaker 03

  No, no, no.

• 59:56H. Foley?

  No crunch? That's crazy. That part's crazy.

• 1:00:00Speaker 03

  That's why I called them fish stick tacos. I'm like, "It's literally fish sticks, cheese."

• 1:00:04Speaker 01

  I think you're even losing the taco a little bit, if I'm being honest with you.

• 1:00:06Speaker 03

  Really?

• 1:00:07Speaker 01

  You need more than just the...

• 1:00:09H. Foley?

  Yeah. That's just sad.

• 1:00:13H. Foley?

  Did the kids eat them?

• 1:00:14Speaker 03

  Dude, we all ate them.

• 1:00:17H. Foley?

  You gotta do some lettuce, tomato, some onion. You gotta jazz that up a little bit.

• 1:00:20Speaker 01

  That's what I'm saying.

• 1:00:21H. Foley?

  I'll tell you what, I'll even give you some tart, I'm sorry, some tartar sauce.

• 1:00:24Speaker 01

  Something.

• 1:00:24H. Foley?

  Cocktail sauce.

• 1:00:25Speaker 03

  No, I put, I put habanero in there and it was good. I'm a big spice guy, though.

• 1:00:30H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 1:00:31Speaker 01

  I'm with it. You know, uh, listen, I, this goes back to, it's good for sure.

• 1:00:36Speaker 03

  Listen, I'll send you guys the recipe. Don't worry.

• 1:00:38Speaker 01

  I've heard it. I think we're good. I think I got it.

• 1:00:40H. Foley?

  You start off with a Honda CRZ.

• 1:00:42Speaker 03

  Uh-huh.

• 1:00:43H. Foley?

  All right.

• 1:00:43Speaker 01

  Huh. Very...

• 1:00:45H. Foley?

  You guys watch TV with the closed captions on?

• 1:00:47Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:00:48H. Foley?

  You do? Why?

• 1:00:50Speaker 03

  Uh, my mom did it for so many years that I think that, uh, we just watch a lot of...

• 1:00:56H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 1:00:57Speaker 03

  Programming with it, yeah.

• 1:00:58Speaker 01

  Uh, anyone in your family ever renew their wedding vows?

• 1:01:02Speaker 03

  No, but you know what my mom did the week before my wedding? Is she married her now husband so she would go to my wedding, a kept woman.

• 1:01:14Speaker 01

  Whoa. That's like medieval time shit. That's like, I can't go as a, as a, you know.

• 1:01:21Speaker 03

  I can't go to some common street woman. I have to be married myself.

• 1:01:25Speaker 01

  I have to be spoken for.

• 1:01:26Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:01:27Speaker 01

  Whoa. Well, where was that wedding?

• 1:01:29Speaker 03

  That was in Kansas.

• 1:01:30Speaker 01

  Yeah, no, I feel, yeah, I meant, what was the, what was the?

• 1:01:33H. Foley?

  What were the turtles wearing?

• 1:01:34Speaker 01

  What?

• 1:01:36Speaker 03

  No, that was, uh, I think that they just went to like the courthouse and got it done.

• 1:01:40Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:01:40Speaker 03

  I don't think, there wasn't like a.

• 1:01:42Speaker 01

  There wasn't a, like a party.

• 1:01:43Speaker 03

  I don't think there was a ceremony. If there was, I definitely, I don't think I was invited. Yeah. Yeah.

• 1:01:48Speaker 01

  Now, now, okay. How is she still with, uh, your stepdad, I presume?

• 1:01:53Speaker 03

  Uh, yeah, her husband. Yeah.

• 1:01:55H. Foley?

  Is that what you call him?

• 1:01:56Speaker 01

  Respect that.

• 1:01:57H. Foley?

  Her husband.

• 1:01:57Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:01:58H. Foley?

  Not stepdad.

• 1:01:59Speaker 03

  Huh?

• 1:01:59H. Foley?

  Not stepdad.

• 1:02:00Speaker 03

  That's her husband.

• 1:02:01H. Foley?

  Yeah, it's her husband.

• 1:02:02Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:02:02H. Foley?

  What do you call him by his name?

• 1:02:04Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:02:04H. Foley?

  Not mister.

• 1:02:05Speaker 03

  No, that'd be silly.

• 1:02:07Speaker 01

  What is this, the Sam lot?

• 1:02:08Speaker 03

  We're both, yeah. We're both, we're both men.

• 1:02:12H. Foley?

  Goddamn same age.

• 1:02:14Speaker 01

  Mr. Jenkins.

• 1:02:16Speaker 03

  He's younger than me.

• 1:02:19Speaker 03

  Are you gonna marry my mom before you call it to my wedding or not?

• 1:02:24Speaker 03

  Oh, I don't know, dude. I'm kinda like not looking for something like long-term or anything.

• 1:02:28H. Foley?

  Are you okay with leaving leftover pizza in the oven off? Until the next morning to have it later or no? Go in the refrigerator.

• 1:02:36Speaker 03

  Ooh, um, I.

• 1:02:40H. Foley?

  Really?

• 1:02:40Speaker 01

  You're not better than me, Jeremiah.

• 1:02:42Speaker 03

  I, I've just never done it before.

• 1:02:45H. Foley?

  What do you do with leftover pizza?

• 1:02:46Speaker 03

  I just throw it in the fridge.

• 1:02:48Speaker 01

  Does the box fit in the fridge for you or no? You gotta de-box it?

• 1:02:51Speaker 03

  I cram it.

• 1:02:52H. Foley?

  Good man.

• 1:02:53Speaker 03

  I fold it and cram it.

• 1:02:54H. Foley?

  Good man. I'll give you that.

• 1:02:55Speaker 03

  Cause I think that it loses flavor if you put it in Tupperware or something like that.

• 1:02:59Speaker 01

  I don't disagree.

• 1:03:00Speaker 03

  There's something about it that, that if you change the environment that it was originally bred in, there's something.

• 1:03:05Speaker 01

  Who doesn't get the show?

• 1:03:06Speaker 03

  Come on. Like literally, I was just in a hotel. I had a large pizza in one of those mini fridges. Dude, I was rolling up the sides and cranking it in and pulling it.

• 1:03:18Speaker 01

  You're taking up the shelves?

• 1:03:19Speaker 03

  Yeah, I was. I had to pull out the bottom shelf to make it fit like diagonally.

• 1:03:23Speaker 01

  And you won't go swimming. What are you, nuts?

• 1:03:25Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:03:26H. Foley?

  If you, if you put, if you put pizza in tinfoil and put it in the fridge, it's done.

• 1:03:32Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:03:33Speaker 01

  There's like a.

• 1:03:33H. Foley?

  I don't know what happens.

• 1:03:34Speaker 01

  There's like a, like the moisture, something, the moisture escaping changes.

• 1:03:40Speaker 03

  It changes the texture.

• 1:03:41Speaker 01

  The cheese gets a little like coagulated-y versus drying out. It, it keeps the.

• 1:03:46Speaker 03

  I agree. It's in the box.

• 1:03:47Speaker 01

  The bags, if you put it in like a big Ziploc bag, that starts sweating. It's not.

• 1:03:52Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah, the sweaty Ziploc. There's something gross about it.

• 1:03:55Speaker 01

  Doesn't, and then it, yeah, it's gone. It's gone. Huh. I mean, listen, if the.

• 1:04:02Speaker 03

  Sure.

• 1:04:02Speaker 01

  You know. He just, he's trash and he gets the show.

• 1:04:06H. Foley?

  How's with a sister bowling?

• 1:04:07Speaker 01

  Have you ever been to a wax museum?

• 1:04:11Speaker 03

  Uh, there's one in LA, but I don't think I've technically been to it.

• 1:04:15Speaker 01

  That would be kitschy if you went in LA. I'm talking like, do you ever go like on vacation with the family?

• 1:04:18Speaker 03

  No. No, no, no.

• 1:04:20Speaker 01

  Good. Have you been to a TJ Maxx or Marshall's or Ross dress for less than the last 30 days?

• 1:04:26Speaker 03

  Not in the last 30 days, but I did get my wife's engagement ring at Marshall's.

• 1:04:34Speaker 01

  I'm sorry, can you say that for the listeners in the back?

• 1:04:37Speaker 03

  I bought my wife's engagement ring at Marshall's.

• 1:04:40Speaker 01

  What?

• 1:04:43H. Foley?

  How did this not come up the last time you were here?

• 1:04:45Speaker 01

  Maybe it did.

• 1:04:46H. Foley?

  Uh, no. What are you, we wouldn't have had him back. You kidding me?

• 1:04:49Speaker 03

  No, I.

• 1:04:50H. Foley?

  We never spoke to him again.

• 1:04:51Speaker 03

  Yeah, I.

• 1:04:51Speaker 01

  How did that's, okay, give me the rundown of this scenario of how you end up at Marshall's buying, which I'm not, I'm not shitting on you.

• 1:04:58H. Foley?

  No.

• 1:04:59Speaker 03

  It's okay if you do.

• 1:05:00Speaker 01

  I'm not celebrating it either, just so you know.

• 1:05:02H. Foley?

  It's an interesting choice.

• 1:05:04Speaker 01

  Well, my whole thing is.

• 1:05:05H. Foley?

  I got her wedding ring at Kohl's, okay?

• 1:05:07Speaker 01

  Kohl's cash. Had some Kohl's bucks on me.

• 1:05:08Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:05:08Speaker 01

  My thing is just that when it comes to Marshall, Marshall's, all these, my, my wife, huge. She's there four days a week. There's a Marshall's by us. She's there all the time.

• 1:05:17Speaker 03

  Yeah. When you can get pop culture t-shirts and an engagement ring, you know you're in a cool spot.

• 1:05:23Speaker 01

  And cookware and food for some reason.

• 1:05:26Speaker 03

  I got you a Rush t-shirt and an engagement ring.

• 1:05:28Speaker 01

  You're the one. Um, what? The thing about those stores is they just get whatever's left over from the other stores. There's no.

• 1:05:36H. Foley?

  I don't know if that's true.

• 1:05:37Speaker 01

  It's a hundred percent true. There's no standard inventory.

• 1:05:39Speaker 03

  That's, that's why they can do those crazy markdown prices on the boards is like, originally it was $400, but now.

• 1:05:45H. Foley?

  I refuse to believe that. I just think they're smart businessmen.

• 1:05:48Speaker 01

  They're not. I mean, they are. They're smart, but they've bought inventory that does not move elsewhere. You can't go, oh, you know what? I get every, that's always in stock.

• 1:05:56H. Foley?

  You're telling me Harry and David's popcorn with the chocolate chunks isn't, isn't moving somewhere? How'd they get that?

• 1:06:03Speaker 03

  We're talking completely different things. That's a specific product that's at Marshall's, right?

• 1:06:09Speaker 01

  Yeah, but they get that because that sells, that doesn't sell through in other places. And they go, well, we've been sitting on these nine cans of food that are like, have a few weeks left.

• 1:06:19Speaker 03

  You think they do that with food too and stuff?

• 1:06:21Speaker 01

  Well, the food they have there, there's no like, first of all.

• 1:06:23Speaker 03

  It's like all packaged goods. Yeah.

• 1:06:25Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's packaged goods and there's about four or five of each thing. There's not like, you can't go, oh, hey, you're out of this. It's all just milky already.

• 1:06:35Speaker 03

  Oh, I've never had this ice cream flavored denim.

• 1:06:39Speaker 01

  Do you have this ice cream in a size nine and a half by any chance in the back?

• 1:06:42Speaker 03

  Listen, I'm trying to fit into an XL hoodie later. Do you got anything diet?

• 1:06:45Speaker 01

  I forgot about the XL hoodie.

• 1:06:47H. Foley?

  I forgot I had it on.

• 1:06:49Speaker 01

  Yeah, there's just.

• 1:06:50Speaker 03

  It's part of your skin now.

• 1:06:52Speaker 01

  Flash frozen on there.

• 1:06:54Speaker 03

  Just scrolling over it.

• 1:06:55Speaker 01

  Yeah, that's all just what's available. So how did you, did you pick, I just, just give me the rundown, yeah?

• 1:07:02Speaker 03

  Uh, it was at a time where.

• 1:07:07H. Foley?

  Y2K just happened.

• 1:07:08Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah. No, it was, it was at a time where I, dude, I, I was very, did not have like any money.

• 1:07:14Speaker 01

  Completely understand.

• 1:07:15Speaker 03

  And my wife and I were getting to a place where I was like, I needed to propose. It needed to happen in our relationship, like to get to that next phase. So kinda she knew where I was at and I needed to, you know, commit to that next step.

• 1:07:28Speaker 01

  Obviously, that's the, the relate, you know, it's the symbol of the commitment.

• 1:07:31Speaker 03

  We had been together like, like, uh, almost seven years at that point, like dating and like we had moved in together, but like, it was kinda like, well, what's, what's happening next? Like in the next chapter, kind of a thing. And, uh, and she's like, it doesn't matter to me. I was like, really? She's like, doesn't matter the cost. I just wanna get married. I go, well, all right. If it doesn't matter, then like, well, let's get a starter ring and Marshall's.

• 1:07:55Speaker 01

  Love that.

• 1:07:56Speaker 03

  Marshall's was the spot.

• 1:07:57Speaker 01

  Would that set you back? 118?

• 1:07:59Speaker 03

  Ooh, I can't say on the air.

• 1:08:01Speaker 01

  Ooh.

• 1:08:02H. Foley?

  Be bad form.

• 1:08:03Speaker 03

  It'd be bad form. But let's say it's under $500 for sure.

• 1:08:08Speaker 01

  That's good. I respect that. Mine wasn't much more than that.

• 1:08:11H. Foley?

  Natural cut or, uh, lab grown?

• 1:08:12Speaker 03

  Oh.

• 1:08:13Speaker 01

  Fake.

• 1:08:15Speaker 01

  CZ.

• 1:08:15Speaker 03

  My wife told me later, she spent, she, after she found out that I got it at Marshall's, she, uh, she said, she was secret, this is very sweet. She was fixing the ring at a rings, uh, store behind my back because she didn't want to embarrass me. Uh, she was replacing the stones that were falling out of it.

• 1:08:31Speaker 01

  Ah, what a sweet woman.

• 1:08:32Speaker 03

  Yeah. Yeah.

• 1:08:33H. Foley?

  Man, that almost made me cry.

• 1:08:35Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:08:35H. Foley?

  If I had a little bit of life left in me.

• 1:08:38Speaker 01

  Would've moved a tear, you know what I mean?

• 1:08:39H. Foley?

  That's, man.

• 1:08:40Speaker 03

  Yeah. Yeah, she was doing that for like months and months. And then like, she's like, oh, I've spent like, like hundreds of dollars. I was like, oh, no, no, no, don't spend hundreds.

• 1:08:50Speaker 01

  What? What? I'd actually ruin.

• 1:08:54H. Foley?

  You're eating a big thing of Harry and David's popcorn?

• 1:08:57Speaker 01

  You're trying to.

• 1:08:57H. Foley?

  Great karma!

• 1:08:58Speaker 01

  You're trying to hammer all dents out of your car? What?

• 1:09:00H. Foley?

  That is, that is, that is so sweet.

• 1:09:02Speaker 01

  That's beautiful.

• 1:09:03Speaker 03

  Yeah, it's pretty, she's incredible. Yeah.

• 1:09:05Speaker 01

  That's great, man.

• 1:09:06Speaker 03

  Yeah, she's the best.

• 1:09:07H. Foley?

  I was adored once too.

• 1:09:09Speaker 01

  I do not remember those days.

• 1:09:12H. Foley?

  That's fucking sweet.

• 1:09:13Speaker 01

  Yeah. I mean, listen, that's what a, what a way to put a fucking button on a humdinger of an app.

• 1:09:17H. Foley?

  Put a ring on it.

• 1:09:19Speaker 01

  Cut that, Luke. Send it to him.

• 1:09:21H. Foley?

  Phew.

• 1:09:22Speaker 01

  Put it in his file.

• 1:09:23H. Foley?

  Crazy Pizza.

• 1:09:24Speaker 01

  Crazy Pizza.

• 1:09:25H. Foley?

  Crazy Pizza, ladies and gentlemen.

• 1:09:26Speaker 03

  Crazy Pizza.

• 1:09:26H. Foley?

  Jeremiah Watkins on his YouTube page. One of the absolute best. I mean, just gets it. Like that wasn't a test. That was just.

• 1:09:35Speaker 01

  It was a celebration.

• 1:09:36H. Foley?

  Let's talk trash.

• 1:09:37Speaker 03

  Yeah, sure. Yeah, that is what it is.

• 1:09:39H. Foley?

  Couple of pizza boats and celebrate.

• 1:09:41Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:09:41H. Foley?

  Congrats on the new special.

• 1:09:42Speaker 01

  Love you, buddy.

• 1:09:43Speaker 03

  Thank you.

• 1:09:43H. Foley?

  We love you very much. What do you got coming up?

• 1:09:44Speaker 01

  Plug away. This will be out next week, the next couple of days.

• 1:09:47Speaker 03

  Yeah, uh, check out Stand Up On The Spot on YouTube after you check out Crazy Pizza, my new one hour special. Uh, both of these boys have done it and are doing it again. And, uh, Trailer Tales, which we keep getting.

• 1:10:00Speaker 01

  Buddy.

• 1:10:00Speaker 03

  So many people who are asking like, when are Kippy and Foley gonna come on Trailer Tales? Cause you guys would fit in.

• 1:10:06Speaker 01

  We gotta get Tammy on here as well.

• 1:10:08Speaker 03

  Oh dude, she would, her, Chelsea Lynn and Libby Higgins are a couple of the funniest people you will ever meet, the sweetest, the kindest. And they are incredible. And like, I should, I, I hope to be able to, to introduce you guys to each other.

• 1:10:20Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. We're, we're, we're big fans.

• 1:10:22Speaker 03

  Yes. Heck, yeah.

• 1:10:24H. Foley?

  Kippy?

• 1:10:25Speaker 01

  Uh, guys, we're on the road. Uh, tour starts in the next week or so. We're gonna be in Appleton, Wisconsin. We're gonna be in Tacoma, San Jose, San Diego, Philly, Atlanta. Uh, those are all the dates within the rest of 2026. Get your tickets at areyougarbage.com. Do it.

• 1:10:42H. Foley?

  Jeremiah, we love you.

• 1:10:42Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:10:43Speaker 03

  Love yous, guys.

• 1:10:44H. Foley?

  Gang, we love you. Check out his special. Support Jeremiah. We love you. We'll see you in three days.

• 1:10:48Speaker 03

  Peace.