Retail Stores Edition w/ Kippy & Foley

Are You Garbage is back with Kippy and Foley for a family episode to answer your garbage questions from Patreon. It's a fun one! Thanks for watching AYG Comedy Podcast. Love youse guys. Come to a live show! Watch Route 66: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OSkJS1gCDR4 Live Shows: https://punchup.live/areyougarbage/tickets PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/AreYouGarbage MERCH: https://areyougarbage.com/ Sponsored by: Lightstrike: Learn more about Lightstrike at Drinklightstrike.com or follow on TikTok and Instagram @drinklightstrike Upside: Download the FREE Upside App and use promo code ayg to get an extra 25 cents back for every gallon on your first tank of gas. Factor: Eat smart with Factor. Get started at https://FACTORMEALS.com/FACTORPODCAST and use code FACTORPODCAST to get 50% off your first box plus free shipping. Comedians H. Foley and Kevin Ryan are self proclaimed GARBAGE. Each week a new stand up comedian gets put to the test. Steal shampoo from hotels? Own a George Foreman Grill? Ever worn JNCO Jeans? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Speaker 00

  Welcome to another exciting edition of Are You Garbage? The show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals or absolute trash. Now, here are your hosts, Kevin Ryan and H. Foley.

• 0:19H. Foley?

  Hey, everybody out there, and welcome back to everybody's favorite podcast. This is Are You Garbage?

• 0:25Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah.

• 0:25H. Foley?

  It's that little show we sit down with your favorite comedians and we find out if they're going to be classy.

• 0:30Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 0:30H. Foley?

  Or if they're just a big old piece of trash.

• 0:32Speaker 02

  Trash, trash, trash.

• 0:33H. Foley?

  I'm your host, H. Foley, coming at you on a beautiful day. We're out back here with Toody's in a new addition. She's out starting a new job today.

• 0:39Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 0:39H. Foley?

  Gold's Gym.

• 0:40Speaker 02

  (laughing).

• 0:41H. Foley?

  Trainer.

• 0:42Speaker 02

  Respect it.

• 0:44H. Foley?

  She's got the winch throw if you need it.

• 0:46Speaker 02

  (laughing).

• 0:47H. Foley?

  My co-host is coming at you from across the table. It's what we call a family episode. Just the boys, the bozos, and the homies. He is the CEO of Are You Garbage. He is an international businessman and an international man of mystery. Ooh, I don't know where he was last night. Give it up for KJ, Kevin James Ryan, everybody.

• 1:03Speaker 02

  What up, gang? Shout out to you. Thanks for tuning in. As always, please make sure you rate, review, subscribe on iTunes. Full video available on YouTube. Also, full video now available on Spotify. Go over there, you can comment, beep, boop, boop. You can watch over there. I don't know what that means, but we're part of a creator program. Check it out.

• 1:17H. Foley?

  We're on the, we're on the goddamn charts over there.

• 1:19Speaker 02

  We are. We're clear, I like, they're like top 50 in all podcasts or something like that. I might be flubbing those numbers a little bit for marketing purposes.

• 1:25H. Foley?

  Seventy-three. Going down.

• 1:28Speaker 02

  Uh, also, patreon.com/areyougarbage, your greatest website of all time. Go over there, get all that bonus content. Uh, the Route 66 Tour over on there on the YouTube channel. Go check that out.

• 1:37H. Foley?

  If you haven't.

• 1:38Speaker 02

  That's still, still climbing. We appreciate it. Share with a friend. We love yous. And also, the boys got a couple of dates left. Uh, first show sold out in Cleveland, first show sold out Pittsburgh. Added shows this April. Get them titties. Come hang with the boys.

• 1:49H. Foley?

  I forgot to mention something in your intro.

• 1:52Speaker 02

  Uh-oh.

• 1:52H. Foley?

  Also, goes along with the episode, former Counterman at the Flagship Store in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, from Macy's Department Store.

• 2:03Speaker 02

  I was a haberdasher, sure.

• 2:04H. Foley?

  At the Wanamaker Building.

• 2:06Speaker 02

  At the Wanamaker Building.

• 2:07H. Foley?

  That's it. Doesn't get any bigger than that.

• 2:09Speaker 02

  Third floor, menswear.

• 2:10H. Foley?

  It does get a little bigger than that.

• 2:12Speaker 02

  Where?

• 2:13H. Foley?

  Bloomingdale's, King of Prussia Mall, fragrance model.

• 2:16Speaker 02

  I would push back on that.

• 2:17H. Foley?

  Winner in 96. How you doing?

• 2:19Speaker 02

  No, okay. First of all, you were a seasonal employee. That's trash. Okay?

• 2:23H. Foley?

  (laughing).

• 2:24Speaker 02

  I was full-time, dog.

• 2:25H. Foley?

  Yeah, they brought me in when they needed me.

• 2:26Speaker 02

  I was banging in the summertime.

• 2:28H. Foley?

  I was a model. You were, you, you, you, you were the fat guy. You had a, probably had a slice of Sparo underneath the register.

• 2:34Speaker 02

  Nah, at that point, I was going to fucking, uh, I was going to Quiznos, getting that chicken.

• 2:41H. Foley?

  Run it through again.

• 2:43Speaker 02

  Oh, man. Getting like, that was the first time it had like real tangy sauce on a sandwich.

• 2:48H. Foley?

  It's the first time I saw an assembly line to make a sandwich. That thing was wild.

• 2:52Speaker 02

  It was like, not a chicken pesto par, it was something like that, man.

• 2:56H. Foley?

  Wasn't a kale salad.

• 2:57Speaker 02

  Well, it, it was not. That and a couple's fucking chocolate chip cookies. Couple two tree heaters. I'd go back and sell you the, sell you the shit out of a pair of fucking Nike swim trunks.

• 3:09H. Foley?

  A little bit of brownie on the corner of your lip.

• 3:11Speaker 02

  Yeah, I was a big retail man. Everybody knows that. My days at Macy's.

• 3:15H. Foley?

  I was a model.

• 3:16Speaker 02

  Stop saying that.

• 3:17H. Foley?

  I was a fragrance model.

• 3:20Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 3:21H. Foley?

  At Bloomingdale's.

• 3:21Speaker 02

  Oh, what do you want me to do? Blow you? What do you want from me, guy?

• 3:25H. Foley?

  You wouldn't have wanted to back then. Spritz as he walked by. I don't know, it's, hey, don't, all black. My Aunt Jill got me the job. She ran the, the makeup counter up there. I love those ladies. I love walking through the perfume department at a, at a department store.

• 3:39Speaker 02

  I hate it. It makes me sad.

• 3:41H. Foley?

  I talk about it all the time on the show. I loved it. That was a hell of a curse. And people would recognize me. Oh my God, what he done? Don't fragrance modeling.

• 3:48Speaker 02

  That's not recognizing you. That's bumping into you. Recognizing you. No, no, no, no. See, this is what you do. People recognize you.

• 3:56H. Foley?

  This is, this is Pete.

• 3:57Speaker 02

  Hey, you're the kid that shit his pants at the Pizza Hut the other day.

• 4:00H. Foley?

  No, no, I didn't shit my pants. This, this, what I was different. This was peak lacrosse. I was probably about a buck sixty-nine, buck seventy, seventy-one.

• 4:08Speaker 02

  I'm not saying you weren't, stop cutting me off. I'm not saying you weren't in shape, but

• 4:14Speaker 02

  there were people you knew you would see.

• 4:16H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 4:16Speaker 02

  Recognize just means, hey, that guy's been on TV before. That ain't always in you. I get a recognize. See, man, you, you're delusional.

• 4:23H. Foley?

  There's a modeling gig. I tried to parlay this.

• 4:26Speaker 02

  It'd be one thing if people recognized you from the modeling gig in school. Oh, you're the guy who sprayed my mom in the eyes with, with Curve.

• 4:34H. Foley?

  Just a bad rationale.

• 4:37Speaker 02

  You guys are bumping fucking knockoffs. That's, made my dog sick.

• 4:42H. Foley?

  I'm selling doops. CKC. That CKB was a big hit. That CK1 too.

• 4:49Speaker 02

  I was a polo man, polo sport.

• 4:51H. Foley?

  If you wanted to close some ass at Widening University, nineteen ninety-five, ninety-six, you better have a little CK1 on you. You know what I'm saying?

• 5:00Speaker 03

  I do. I have some sad news.

• 5:02H. Foley?

  What?

• 5:02Speaker 03

  The Macy's at the Watermaker Building will be closing down.

• 5:05Speaker 02

  I heard that.

• 5:06H. Foley?

  What?

• 5:06Speaker 02

  I heard that.

• 5:07H. Foley?

  This month?

• 5:08Speaker 02

  Wow, someone messaged me that.

• 5:09H. Foley?

  No more light show at Christmas?

• 5:10Speaker 02

  I gotta go back. I'm doing, I'm giving a big speech. I'm doing it for three of them sandwiches.

• 5:19Speaker 02

  Couple of them sandwiches!

• 5:21H. Foley?

  And if Raj from Quiznos was here, he would tell you the same thing.

• 5:25Speaker 02

  It was like a chicken bake, oh man, whatever it was. It had mushrooms on it. I didn't like the mushies. I told him I was allergic. Get outta here.

• 5:34H. Foley?

  Had some fancy name like Monterey or something like that?

• 5:37Speaker 02

  It was something I ain't never seen before.

• 5:39H. Foley?

  Thousand Island Kippy?

• 5:41Speaker 02

  That and there was that bar Champs right across the street in that Marriott. I'd go in there and get my chicken tenders and

• 5:46H. Foley?

  Sure.

• 5:46Speaker 02

  and diet kooks.

• 5:47H. Foley?

  Pick up a bunch of chicks after your shift, huh?

• 5:49Speaker 02

  I was wearing my dad's suit. I gotta wear a suit every day. I wear my dad's suit.

• 5:54H. Foley?

  Oh man, I bet your dogs were barking towards the end of that shift.

• 5:57Speaker 02

  I was in Danny's shoes. They might as well buried me. I was in my dad's suit and Danny's old shoes.

• 6:07H. Foley?

  Ready, ready for the funeral, huh?

• 6:09Speaker 02

  Talk about a goodwill kid. Jesus Christ.

• 6:12H. Foley?

  Call the undertaker would have to do is trim those eyebrows, huh? You'd be alright.

• 6:15Speaker 02

  Just so he could close the door. They're popping out. Ah, he's trying to close the door.

• 6:21H. Foley?

  Ah, man.

• 6:24H. Foley?

  That would suck, dying in the suit you're buried in.

• 6:27Speaker 02

  I mean, he just rolled me right, dude. I never told you this. We, we, I, I, I'd have worked till 8:15. I think they closed at 8. I'd have worked till 8:15.

• 6:35H. Foley?

  When was this run? We're talking about retail.

• 6:37Speaker 02

  We're, we're talking retail. That's how you move, that's how you move product. Dim lighting and cheap fabric.

• 6:44H. Foley?

  When was this run?

• 6:46Speaker 02

  What do you mean run?

• 6:47H. Foley?

  When you, when did you work there? When were you employed?

• 6:52H. Foley?

  This is in college?

• 6:53Speaker 02

  My brother was in the, my brother got me the job. That's what dirtbags, you know, that's what dirtbags do. One gets in and he opens the door for the other. He was in the manager program. Like, like at the manager program at Bloomingdale or whatever.

• 7:05H. Foley?

  Of course. Now, if I had, if you had to define diminishing returns.

• 7:09Speaker 02

  Uh huh.

• 7:10H. Foley?

  The, the, the elder Ryan is...

• 7:15H. Foley?

  A superior model to what I look across the table at every day. Hey, good-looking kid. Sharp guy, good-looking kid. He should be a young guy working there.

• 7:26Speaker 02

  What was I? I was a young guy working there.

• 7:28H. Foley?

  Quiznos, okay?

• 7:30Speaker 02

  That's a fine establishment.

• 7:32H. Foley?

  His shirt had bacon bits on it.

• 7:35Speaker 02

  I have all the clothes were dirty that I wore. Cause I don't wear, I work 5 to 8 15.

• 7:41H. Foley?

  When was this run? Were you in college?

• 7:43Speaker 02

  I was in college.

• 7:44H. Foley?

  You were in college?

• 7:45Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 7:45H. Foley?

  So you would be in college and you'd go work in the city?

• 7:48Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 7:49H. Foley?

  What a loser.

• 7:50Speaker 02

  Working on the weekend like you should.

• 7:52H. Foley?

  What a loser, dude. Would you be showing up late to parties with like your tie on?

• 8:01Speaker 02

  I wouldn't call them parties, but I did frequent a guy. That was hot.

• 8:05H. Foley?

  Smelling like Tom McCann's soles?

• 8:08Speaker 02

  I would go. I did show up to a couple of spots.

• 8:11H. Foley?

  Whoa.

• 8:12Speaker 02

  And I remember one kid was like, "You look good." We were out front smoking a cig. And I didn't, I was a very no haircut haircut kinda guy. And my buddy Patty, not Patty of Patty fame, another Patty. He was like, "You look good, man. Why don't you do something with that hair?" Cause it's just like, he's like, "Just brush it aside, do something." Put a little product in there.

• 8:33H. Foley?

  This guy's down there selling ties like Boris Johnson.

• 8:37H. Foley?

  Nothing on that!

• 8:40H. Foley?

  Former Prime Minister.

• 8:43Speaker 02

  Um, yeah, very, yes, very, very, very Boris Johnson-esque.

• 8:48H. Foley?

  So you worked there?

• 8:49Speaker 02

  So I worked there in college. I would probably say, uh, my junior and senior year maybe or ju-

• 8:54H. Foley?

  Through the summer? Or would it only be when you were in school?

• 8:58Speaker 02

  Through the summer. I think I might only work there a year. So it was probably like September to like a little bit in the summer. And then I'd have to drive down there, cause then I wouldn't live down there in the summer.

• 9:10H. Foley?

  Right.

• 9:10Speaker 02

  So I'd live in fucking, uh, I'd live in Bucks at my, at my, at my ma's house and I would drive, I would take her, that was when I was in the bravata. I would drive her bravata down. I have to pay for parking. That was like 25 bucks. I was making, you know-

• 9:26Speaker 02

  Wow, 70 bucks a day. Between that and the Quiznos, I'm out of cash.

• 9:30H. Foley?

  For the folks that aren't familiar, it's in a very nice historic building in Center City, Philadelphia called the Wanamaker Building. John Wanamaker. Wanamaker's was an old department store. Macy's bought him out, whatever, you know, things go. This and that. It's a nice place. It was a beautiful building.

• 9:47Speaker 02

  Yeah, it still is. They do the Christmas things there. That was when you really wanted to put a gun in your mouth. Alright, hold on, let me let, let me. Man, they do the Christmas show every hour on the 15th. So it'd be like, 115, 25th, and these fucking mouth, "What time's the show coming?" Little kid shitting himself.

• 10:03H. Foley?

  Lady, you wouldn't know a Van Huse in if it hit you in the face. Now get out of here.

• 10:07Speaker 02

  You think you're Alfani material?

• 10:09H. Foley?

  So you didn't, it's funny, you didn't have a mall to go wander around. You had to go down the street to get your nourishment.

• 10:16Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 10:16H. Foley?

  Huh.

• 10:17Speaker 02

  But that was good because you're just out right outside. But then you're just in the streets of Philadelphia. You're just fucking, you're catching heaters, just fucking fighting the, fighting the zombies. So here, let me put this, before we get into it, this, this came in from Sean. This just goes, I think, to sum up, because you were never a retail man. I mean, you were, your modeling career, obviously, I don't want to, I don't want to, but that, that's more entertainment business. That's not.

• 10:41H. Foley?

  I was paid as an actor. You know, you know, you know how delusional I am? I thought.

• 10:44Speaker 02

  Yes, I do. Thanks for, thanks for checking in with me, though, after five years.

• 10:48H. Foley?

  So this is, uh, this is winter break, I think, either, it would have had to been my freshman year, after my freshman year of college, or in, in the middle of my freshman year, or middle of my sophomore year of college. Um, I, I was hired, I, I was paid as an actor, I believe, if I'm not mistaken, or talent, or something like that. I, the only job that I had, I just had to stand there and hand out cards and spray people, and talk people up about CKB, and I'd be in different places in the store.

• 11:20Speaker 02

  So you never worked retail?

• 11:21H. Foley?

  No.

• 11:22Speaker 02

  That's not retail.

• 11:23H. Foley?

  That's modeling.

• 11:24Speaker 02

  That's fashion. That's high fashion where I come from.

• 11:28H. Foley?

  Sure. I thought that I was gonna get points.

• 11:30Speaker 02

  What year did you go to Paris?

• 11:33H. Foley?

  Walk the runway?

• 11:34Speaker 02

  Break it? What year was that?

• 11:37H. Foley?

  Anna Wintour screwed me out of that gig.

• 11:40Speaker 02

  How many?

• 11:40H. Foley?

  She said I was too good looking. She wanted me embarrassing the French models.

• 11:44Speaker 02

  How many Victoria's Secret models did you date?

• 11:47H. Foley?

  I was teamed up with this dime piece.

• 11:49Speaker 02

  Uh huh.

• 11:49H. Foley?

  I don't know what happened to her. I lost touch with her.

• 11:52Speaker 02

  She still has all her teeth, I bet, unlike some people at the table.

• 11:58Speaker 02

  Sir, if I spray this cologne on me, am I gonna lose all my teeth like you?

• 12:01H. Foley?

  I had my teeth back then. I had been taking a lot of heat about my teeth and my tongue and my face. Not a job about references.

• 12:08Speaker 02

  Overall well-being?

• 12:10H. Foley?

  I thought I was gonna get SAG credit for it. I swear to God.

• 12:17Speaker 02

  I mean, you are an all-time buzzin' dude.

• 12:19H. Foley?

  I thought that was the start of it. I thought that's how you get to Milan. Cannes Film Festival. Thought I was gonna be fucking-

• 12:27Speaker 02

  Now you just got a set of cans.

• 12:28H. Foley?

  Doing H with Kate Moss and Johnny Depp hanging out. Smoking cigarettes like this. Thought I just went back to Widener and flunked out.

• 12:37Speaker 02

  I don't need this. I'm in fashion.

• 12:40H. Foley?

  I worked at West Coast Video my senior year of high school.

• 12:43Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 12:44H. Foley?

  That was my retail. I wasn't good with the...

• 12:47Speaker 02

  I would argue that's more customer service. That's not retail. You're not really selling.

• 12:50H. Foley?

  That's retail.

• 12:51Speaker 02

  I'm not. Listen. Hey.

• 12:53H. Foley?

  Hey, we're paying wholesale prices, I can tell you that.

• 12:56Speaker 02

  Sure. That was more customer service. You're not selling. You're renting.

• 13:01H. Foley?

  Landscaper, waiter, laborer.

• 13:04Speaker 02

  So just say no. Why can't you just say no to the question? This is crazy.

• 13:09H. Foley?

  We did sell at West Coast Video. You were able to not just rent, you could buy.

• 13:15Speaker 02

  I'm aware of that, but nobody was-

• 13:17H. Foley?

  Retail purchase, right? Luke?

• 13:18Speaker 02

  30 videos?

• 13:21H. Foley?

  Can't return those.

• 13:22Speaker 02

  I'm just saying you weren't in the shit, man.

• 13:25H. Foley?

  No.

• 13:25Speaker 02

  Okay. As very eloquently put, this is from Sean, "I know we hear a lot about the perils of restaurant workers, often on the show, rightfully so."

• 13:34H. Foley?

  Yes.

• 13:34Speaker 02

  "But I worked at an F Y E. while in high school slash college, 08 to 2012, and I think people forget about the trenches of mall retail workers were in on any given Friday night."

• 13:45H. Foley?

  God love you.

• 13:46Speaker 02

  "I'm 33 and still have a group chat with four of the people I worked with back then, and every once in a while, someone will bring up repressed memories, like Vietnam flashback. For reference, I was also active duty military, and the vibe of both group chats are unnervingly similar at times."

• 14:03H. Foley?

  I get it, man.

• 14:04Speaker 02

  There is like, I remember at Macy's, I didn't know retail, I had never worked retail like that, I don't think.

• 14:11H. Foley?

  Were you selling, like, were you?

• 14:12Speaker 02

  I was cashier on the floor.

• 14:13H. Foley?

  I understand that, but would you go and help people, "Hey, this shirt, I want to wear this with this", would you be like, would you be selling, did you get commission?

• 14:21Speaker 02

  No. Commission, I was making $8 an hour.

• 14:24H. Foley?

  Jesus.

• 14:25Speaker 02

  $8.15 an hour.

• 14:27H. Foley?

  So you had no motivation to help people, like, you know, "Hey, why don't you get the shoes too", or "Get this", or whatever?

• 14:32Speaker 02

  No.

• 14:32H. Foley?

  I thought that's how that worked.

• 14:34Speaker 02

  No, I think the suit people got commission, like, if you're selling suit, if you're moving units, you're moving D K and Y, you're moving commission.

• 14:41H. Foley?

  You weren't standing behind the counter, you were walking around in your, what were you, in shirts, socks, shoes?

• 14:45Speaker 02

  I was in men's, men's active, I was in charge of...

• 14:49H. Foley?

  Active wear?

• 14:49Speaker 02

  I was in charge of dungarees.

• 14:53H. Foley?

  Would you fold and put back on the shirt? Okay, so you're not just standing behind, you're not a checkout?

• 14:56Speaker 02

  You're behind, no, yeah, but, listen, this guy's never worked retail, let me explain something.

• 15:01H. Foley?

  Would you gift wrap?

• 15:02Speaker 02

  Let me explain something, now you go up on the third floor, they gift wrap it for you for free, just show them the receipt.

• 15:06H. Foley?

  I could never do those curls. I'd see my mom do that, I went, "What the fuck?"

• 15:10Speaker 02

  Yeah, no, no, we didn't do anything. We had a circle sign and say, that was the big thing. So all these major big box retailers want information from, you know, from the customer.

• 15:23H. Foley?

  Here we go.

• 15:24Speaker 02

  So you had to put, so hold on, I worked at Macy's in Center City, Philadelphia, probably 2000... What would that be 2007, 8 ish? Probably 2008, right? And-

• 15:37H. Foley?

  Right before you met me. Your whole world turned around.

• 15:40Speaker 02

  Yeah, uh huh. Um, and I, yeah. Still remember those days. First time I ever hung out with you, complained about how far I parked from the venue. I swear to fucking god. He goes, "I thought you said it was a couple of blocks." This is, well, this is a real hump, huh? So the guy fucking, I'm driving him home. Meanwhile, he's smoking all my fucking cigarettes, taking some for the ride when he gets home.

• 16:03H. Foley?

  You wanna go back to fucking JC Penney's wherever I found ya? Punk?

• 16:07Speaker 02

  Found to me? Wherever you found to me?

• 16:10H. Foley?

  Plucked you out of-

• 16:11Speaker 02

  Guy, you were forty-

• 16:12H. Foley?

  Plucked you out of a sea of talent.

• 16:13Speaker 02

  Guy, you were forty bumming cigs off me, asking for rides home, and then complaining about it.

• 16:19H. Foley?

  Lucky you did that. Or you wouldn't be sitting here. With me drinking your seltzer. Kip, let's talk about Light Strike Hard Refresher.

• 16:27Speaker 02

  Shout out to Light Strike.

• 16:29H. Foley?

  Shout out to all you party animals out there. The Two Bears 5K is in Tampa, Florida, this May 4th, and sponsored by the first beverage built to outpace the party. Of course, we're talking about Light Strike Hard Refresher, an excellent source of 5% alcohol. Let's go, baby. Light Strike is finally here, and unlike anything the alcohol industry has seen before, Light Strike isn't just a drink, it's a goddamn survival tool. It's perfect for any party pacer. Why choose between fun and function? Choose Light Strike, baby.

• 17:01Speaker 02

  Yeah, uh, this hydration drink-inspired cocktail low-key brings its own self-care to the party with a crushable mix of coconut water, sea salt, and 5% alcohol by volume. That's all the good stuff and the bad stuff. How you do it? It's non-carbonated, gluten-free, and a great alternative to fizzy hard seltzers or sugary cane cocktails. That's the problem. You start drinking them cocktails-

• 17:22H. Foley?

  Get dehydrated.

• 17:22Speaker 02

  And the sugar, man, it's like your teeth are falling out of your mouth. Uh, Light Strike Hard Refresher is launching nationally this month with two flavors, lemon, lime, and mango. They were nice enough to send them over here, and I gotta tell ya, the boys were fighting over them. It was like, they hit them like the Tasmanian devil. Um, learn more about Light Strike at drinklightstrike, lightstrike.com, or follow on TikTok and Instagram at drinklightstrike. One more time, drinklightstrike.com.

• 17:49H. Foley?

  Do it.

• 17:50Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 17:51H. Foley?

  Kip, what's going on about Upside? Shout out to Upside. Gang, one of the smartest apps you can have on your phone in 2025 is Upside. Upside gives you the power to earn more on the stuff you buy all the time. Whether you're filling up your tank, going out to eat, or shopping for groceries, the Upside app lets you earn cash back on every purchase. Upside users are making as much as $208 a year, Kip. That's a lot of cash.

• 18:15Speaker 02

  Baby, uh, the free Upside app gets you cash back on daily essentials like gas, groceries, and dining. We use it every time we're filling up the gas tank. Bada bing bada boom, Upside lets you wet your beak. To get started, download the free Upside app, use our promo code AYG and get an extra 25 cents back for every gallon on your first tank of gas.

• 18:35H. Foley?

  Damn.

• 18:36Speaker 02

  Look at that. Uh, next, claim an offer, uh, for whatever you're buying on Upside. Then pay as usual with a credit debit card. Follow the steps in the app to get paid. There are over 100,000 gas stations, grocery stores, and restaurants on the Upside app, ensuring that the cash back is always just around the corner. You can earn an average of 8% on restaurant and grocery purchases. And the best part, you can even stack your Upside cash on top of your credit and debit card rewards. Talk about wetting your beak, playing both ends from the middle. Upside users earning hundreds of dollars a year. And that's probably why they have a 4.8 star rating on the App Store. Here's the turkey.

• 19:09H. Foley?

  Look at it.

• 19:09Speaker 02

  Download the free Upside app and use the promo code AYG to get an extra 25% back, 25 cents back for every gallon on your first tank of gas. That's an extra 25 cents back for every gallon on your first tank of gas using the promo code AYG. Do it. You would work the debt, you'd be, if, you know, if you had downtime, you were folded. Yeah, you had to, you had to stay on top of your fucking, on, on top of your shit.

• 19:29H. Foley?

  Mm-hmm.

• 19:30Speaker 02

  Uh, I was in charge of, it was like Nike stuff, uh, active.

• 19:35H. Foley?

  What I'm saying is, would you go, if, if you saw me walking up and I'm looking at the Nike sweatsuits?

• 19:39Speaker 02

  Yeah, hey, how you doing? Anything I can help you with today?

• 19:41H. Foley?

  Beautiful.

• 19:42Speaker 02

  Uh-huh. Uh, sorry, sorry, we don't carry 6XL. And you have a hole in your pants, a mustard on your shirt. We're gonna have to ask you to leave.

• 19:49H. Foley?

  I want to talk to your manager.

• 19:50Speaker 02

  Well, he's talking, it's my brother, he's on his way. He's not going to be a fan either. He don't like me, he definitely gonna like you.

• 19:55H. Foley?

  Was he your manager?

• 19:56Speaker 02

  No, he was at another store. He was out in like, uh...

• 19:59H. Foley?

  He was in the manager training program?

• 20:01Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 20:01H. Foley?

  I bet you they do alright.

• 20:03Speaker 02

  Sure. But I remembered, uh, the guy said to him, he's like, "Don't be the, you're not rewarded in retail, don't be the martyr." Like, don't stay, like, he was like, he's working like 15 hour days and this and that, you're not getting paid for it, like, just, like, you're trying to solve the, you're trying to win the battle every night.

• 20:19H. Foley?

  They don't reward you, you can't come up and go up and be a general manager or something like that?

• 20:23Speaker 02

  I don't think anything...

• 20:24H. Foley?

  Cause it, it always looked nice. I was always jealous of those skills that I didn't have, like, watching, like, just Christmas shopping this year, cause, you know, we went to the Willow Grove Mall and stuff like that. Seeing like, you know, them like, the way they handle the fabric, they fold it up nice, they're really good, they know everything, the bags were nice.

• 20:42Speaker 02

  I used to know all the, I, I used to know all the, the, all of the Levi's jeans.

• 20:48H. Foley?

  501, 502, button fly.

• 20:50Speaker 02

  501, 505, 527, they were the bootcut, I were banging back in the day. Said a bootcut's on you? Don't better believe I had some of them.

• 20:58H. Foley?

  More of a husky man.

• 20:58Speaker 02

  Think 50, 505's were the button fly maybe? 501's were the original.

• 21:04H. Foley?

  Levi, Levi 501's.

• 21:06Speaker 02

  They were, they were the orig-

• 21:06H. Foley?

  Those button flies when I was in high school and college, forget about it. I used to rock-

• 21:11Speaker 02

  But that was like straight, like, that's when they all started banging, skinny started getting all slim, it wasn't skinny yet, it was slim.

• 21:17H. Foley?

  I used to rock those with no underwear.

• 21:18Speaker 02

  511's, 511's were skinny, I think.

• 21:21H. Foley?

  I would rock those with no underwear.

• 21:23Speaker 02

  Yeah, there you go.

• 21:24H. Foley?

  Tight little body on, running around.

• 21:26Speaker 02

  I remember just reliving the glory days of how hot you were, apparently. Guy, give it up.

• 21:34Speaker 02

  That's like me talking about how good my hair used to be. What are we doing here, bro?

• 21:37H. Foley?

  You're talking about jeans, I'm trying to relate.

• 21:42Speaker 02

  Why don't you try to get back in a pair? That way you can really-

• 21:45H. Foley?

  I got jeans. I'm gonna butt fly.

• 21:48Speaker 02

  Oh. Um...

• 21:50H. Foley?

  Hurt my testicles.

• 21:51Speaker 02

  But you would walk around and help. Like, "Yeah, hey, what do you need, whatever?" And at the end of the night, you had to stop and make sure all your stuff was-

• 21:59H. Foley?

  Right.

• 21:59Speaker 02

  Dunzo. You know what I mean?

• 22:00H. Foley?

  Hmm.

• 22:01Speaker 02

  That fucking sucked. That was the first place I worked where they searched me on the way out.

• 22:04H. Foley?

  Jesus.

• 22:05Speaker 02

  You had to get searched on the way out to make sure you weren't stealing. I'm like, "Guy, it's me." You know what I mean?

• 22:10H. Foley?

  Holy shit.

• 22:10Speaker 02

  But you also had a- a lot of the retail places, if you know, if you were out there, if you ever worked retail, like, ring it up. You have to ask, "Hey, do you want to open a credit card?" "You don't open a Boskov's credit card, you want a Macy's credit card, a Best Buy credit card."

• 22:20H. Foley?

  "You want to ruin your life?"

• 22:22Speaker 02

  That was the big thing. And also, you had to circle, sign, and say. You had to circle... Your name. Circle the website, say your name.

• 22:29H. Foley?

  Hmm.

• 22:29Speaker 02

  Circle, sign.

• 22:30H. Foley?

  Hit the survey?

• 22:31Speaker 02

  And, "Hey, if you like what you want, hit the survey." I never did that. I'm like, "Guy, I'm fucking..."

• 22:36H. Foley?

  Guy with the pepperoni breath was really helpful.

• 22:40Speaker 02

  That's actually carbonara. That's what it was. Chicken carbonara sandwich. Without mushroom, with no mushrooms. That's it was- I didn't know what carbonara was. I thought it was a carbureator. I said, "Guy, I don't know what kind..."

• 22:49H. Foley?

  No mushrooms.

• 22:51Speaker 02

  I remember they gave them to me one time. I sent it back. I'm allergic to these. I can't have them.

• 22:57H. Foley?

  Oh, man. A fucking cooked mushroom to you. Might as well have been eating a slug.

• 23:00Speaker 02

  Eating an eyeball. No, thank you. Buddy, I don't do drugs. Thanks for asking. I'm on the clock. I gotta get back to the men's department.

• 23:10H. Foley?

  I'm straight edge, dog. Um...

• 23:13Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 23:13H. Foley?

  I, uh... I always feel bad about it, but I'm not great in those situations as far as putting things back where-

• 23:23Speaker 02

  Listen, I- as a guy who I hated, people would come in- I was just- I was just shopping with my wife the other day and, uh, she was like, not getting stuff and I- The woman went, "Just put it here." Like, out of the fitting room. And I didn't like doing that because that just piles up and- Go- I- I- I go- I go put it back. I'm gonna go hang this up for you. I'm gonna go put it back.

• 23:45H. Foley?

  Um, I look like- it's like a raccoon got in the trash.

• 23:48Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 23:49H. Foley?

  I try. I'm just not neat like that. I try to put it back.

• 23:52Speaker 02

  You gotta just make an effort. You just can't like, the pile up on top.

• 23:55H. Foley?

  I leave it in the changing room now.

• 23:57Speaker 02

  Yeah, that's not-

• 23:57H. Foley?

  I left stuff in there.

• 23:58Speaker 02

  I get it. Yeah, it's just not for me. They tell you to do that, I get that. They tell you to do that, I just- As a guy, I didn't know people did that. I didn't know that was like a rule. Like the fifth day, I went in and there was like a fucking six foot pile of clothes. And I thought I was on my way out. I thought I was clocking the fuck out. I go to check to make sure no one's in there. And there's like fucking 150 pieces of clothes I got. Oh, I was so pissed. I recall my brother, this fucking cockamamie company you got running here. Fucking animals. Um, alright, let's see here. This one's from, uh, Tody Fick. Uh... You say you're out getting... Setting the scene. You're out getting new shoes with your mom as a kid.

• 24:41H. Foley?

  I'm with ya.

• 24:41Speaker 02

  Is she having you walk and run up and down the aisles to make sure they fit? I distinctly remember treating Payless like the combine.

• 24:51H. Foley?

  He's doing a high show.

• 24:54H. Foley?

  My mom, and I hear this from my nephew now. My mother, when she tests to see how far the big toe is in the shoe.

• 25:03Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 25:04H. Foley?

  You're lucky your fucking nail doesn't crack. I mean, she applies pressure to make sure that there's room in the shoe.

• 25:12Speaker 02

  Why are they so... I mean, they were so concerned with it.

• 25:15H. Foley?

  Come here! Fucking thumb just...

• 25:18Speaker 02

  Brandon, yeah?

• 25:19H. Foley?

  Dude! Fucking, you goddamn fucking break my foot!

• 25:22Speaker 02

  Uh-huh. I remember one time, I was, I was too old. I was older, not too old, but I was old. And I was getting roller blades for hockey. And we were at, you know, we were at the Sports Authority out there on Route 1 by Oyster Valley Mall. And there was this nice, I forget what they were, like a good... Good set of, what, Bowers or something, you know, like a little heightened, not like recreational. They were like, you know, hot, like roller hockey skates.

• 25:46H. Foley?

  Recreation.

• 25:47Speaker 02

  And, uh, I put them on. And I was rollerblading to check, and I thought I was real fucking cool. And my mom's like, "You're really good." I'm like, "Yeah, no big deal, dude." I was skating backwards and shit. Dude, I was over by like the canoes and stuff. I was showing off.

• 26:03H. Foley?

  Fell into a bunch of coolers.

• 26:06Speaker 02

  I'm in the golf section. What's up, pussies? I was like, I remember being like, "Man, you are good. Yeah, there's probably some scouts out here gonna fucking see me inside."

• 26:15H. Foley?

  Yeah, you always had to do a little fuck, you know, a little three-point stance, you know, to show a guy coming off the line.

• 26:21Speaker 02

  Ah, yeah, they're, these are good.

• 26:22H. Foley?

  I used to-

• 26:23Speaker 02

  You got your clerk jacked up. You're running them down the, you're running them down the aisle like the sled.

• 26:30H. Foley?

  Trying on wrestling shoes. I'm down in the start position.

• 26:34Speaker 02

  I get me, I swear to God. I got 50 bucks and you don't get me, pussy.

• 26:39H. Foley?

  Doing fireman scary to my mother.

• 26:44Speaker 02

  You're up on the, they're not from the top rope, fucking.

• 26:47H. Foley?

  I loved, lo, okay, I hated the foot thing, the measure, the side, the front, that thing, that was a NASA piece of equipment. And Patty would swoosh him. Bring some poor bastard over, get him involved. I love the bench, the little bench-

• 27:05Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah.

• 27:06H. Foley?

  With the fucking, with the slanted mirror, man, your shit looked tight.

• 27:10Speaker 02

  That was like that portable, that was like a seat. So he would sit, he would sit on it, right?

• 27:14H. Foley?

  He would sit on it?

• 27:14Speaker 02

  I think that was for the salesman. He would sit on it, lace you up, put you in, then you could walk, you go back and see.

• 27:20H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 27:20Speaker 02

  Yeah, we had Phil's shoes, that's where I remember that.

• 27:23H. Foley?

  Some of those dudes, man, they would lace you up like you were jumping out of a Huey, just fucking.

• 27:27Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 27:28H. Foley?

  Crazy tight.

• 27:29Speaker 02

  Uh-huh.

• 27:30H. Foley?

  He's fashionable, loosen these up a little bit. You got my tongue up in my fucking socks.

• 27:34Speaker 02

  I never, uh, I never knew it, yeah.

• 27:39Speaker 02

  There it is. Wait, that opened in 1991.

• 27:42H. Foley?

  What did?

• 27:42Speaker 02

  Phil's Family Shoes, Crossroads Plaza, grand opening. It took out a whole page in the Philadelphia Inquirer.

• 27:49H. Foley?

  Are they still popping?

• 27:49Speaker 02

  Nah, that closed. You could win 76ers tickets.

• 27:56H. Foley?

  Not a great year for them, but-

• 27:57Speaker 02

  Yeah, "Harry in, these shoes are des-" Ah, that's a great line. Rockports was the thing. "Harry in, these shoes are designed to go fast." 355-0732.

• 28:10H. Foley?

  Got a pair of Rockports at the house.

• 28:13H. Foley?

  My dad turned me on to them.

• 28:15Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 28:15H. Foley?

  Cause they're comfy for bigger guys.

• 28:17Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 28:18H. Foley?

  Rock ports.

• 28:18Speaker 02

  Very much so.

• 28:19H. Foley?

  My first pair of rock ports were hand-me-downs of his.

• 28:21Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm. Uh.

• 28:23H. Foley?

  All the time.

• 28:24Speaker 02

  This one's great. This is from Joey Bag of Donuts, $10 homie. "I used to work overnight at the flagship LL Bean store in Maine. It was open to customers 24/7."

• 28:32H. Foley?

  Oh my god.

• 28:33Speaker 02

  "My main job was to chase out teenagers who would hook up in the tents."

• 28:38H. Foley?

  Damn.

• 28:39Speaker 02

  That's a place to go fucking canoodle with your, with your, with your gal pal or your guy guy.

• 28:45H. Foley?

  Flagship LL Bean?

• 28:47Speaker 03

  That store is sick.

• 28:48Speaker 02

  You know it?

• 28:48Speaker 03

  I've been there.

• 28:49Speaker 02

  Whoa.

• 28:49Speaker 03

  They have an archery range in there.

• 28:51Speaker 02

  Shit.

• 28:52H. Foley?

  Jesus.

• 28:52Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 28:53H. Foley?

  Get around, don't you? What the hell were you doing up there?

• 28:55Speaker 03

  Got family up there.

• 28:56H. Foley?

  Hmm.

• 28:57Speaker 02

  Uh, that's alright. I mean, one, weird job. I had, you know, chasing out teens who were smooching, whatever. That could have been the main response. I didn't hire them for that.

• 29:09H. Foley?

  You gotta do primetime someplace like that. Probably pretty nice. LL Bean was banging.

• 29:14Speaker 02

  LL Bean's a great company.

• 29:15H. Foley?

  Mm-hmm.

• 29:16Speaker 02

  Uh, I always loved those, I lo-, I still like those, uh, more outdoorsy stores. We don't run into them a whole bunch here.

• 29:24H. Foley?

  REI?

• 29:25Speaker 02

  Loving REI. Love going in there. I just like the, I like functional gear.

• 29:30H. Foley?

  Mm-hmm.

• 29:30Speaker 02

  Let me look at this and what's, oh, that's, cause you go into those stores, they go, oh, they have the thing for that one thing. You know what I mean? Like, oh, I have this task, or this bangs on my, whatever. You go, oh, here's the thing to size. I love that.

• 29:43H. Foley?

  Got a Cartman watch? What are they called?

• 29:45Speaker 02

  I don't even know what that is.

• 29:46H. Foley?

  Cartman. Carman.

• 29:47Speaker 03

  Garmin.

• 29:47H. Foley?

  Garmin. Yeah.

• 29:49Speaker 02

  You'd get a Cartman watch.

• 29:50H. Foley?

  Get one of those, couple of Carabiners.

• 29:52Speaker 02

  Ah, man.

• 29:53H. Foley?

  Hook 'em up.

• 29:54Speaker 02

  Remembering Carabiners hit?

• 29:55H. Foley?

  Sure.

• 29:57Speaker 02

  Uh, alright, this one's from Josh. Uh, "Is it Garbs? I don't go to my local mall anymore because they got rid of Annie Ann's Pretzel Shop. P.S. They got another pretzel shop called Rogers Pretzels and it can kick rocks." I respect that dude.

• 30:10H. Foley?

  Yeah, fuck that.

• 30:11Speaker 02

  Get eyes on Rogers Pretzels. That's, that might be a standalone guy.

• 30:14H. Foley?

  They're not.

• 30:15Speaker 02

  I've been to a lot of malls and dining and stuff. I ain't never seen Rogers Pretzels.

• 30:20H. Foley?

  Annie Ann's all day.

• 30:21Speaker 02

  What do you got on Rogers?

• 30:23Speaker 03

  Believe it's Mr. Rogers.

• 30:24Speaker 02

  Oh, Mr. Rogers Pretzels? That's gotta be some sort of trademark infringement you would have.

• 30:30H. Foley?

  Probably pretzel twists. Those braids.

• 30:32Speaker 02

  Ah, get outta here with that shit.

• 30:34H. Foley?

  Easter? Fucking bullshit. Annie Ann's.

• 30:37Speaker 03

  Rogers seems to also be more of like a specialty store, not like they're banging them out fresh every day.

• 30:43H. Foley?

  Oh, fuck that.

• 30:45Speaker 02

  Yeah, alright buddy, I'm on your side. Fuck them guys.

• 30:47H. Foley?

  I don't think an Annie Ann's is ever closed. That, that, they're closing. The mall's on its way out.

• 30:54Speaker 02

  Sure, I don't think you're wrong.

• 30:55H. Foley?

  That's bad. You got snakes in that mall. It's no good.

• 30:58Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 30:59H. Foley?

  Get outta here with that.

• 31:00Speaker 02

  Uh huh.

• 31:00H. Foley?

  That's the last, that and the Cinnabon.

• 31:03Speaker 02

  Yeah, they're like, they're like, they're like roaches. You know, they'll, they'll, they'll survive the nuclear blast.

• 31:08H. Foley?

  When Cinnabon hit, oh my god.

• 31:11Speaker 02

  Never got us. We were Annie Ann's family.

• 31:13H. Foley?

  My family went nuts for those things.

• 31:18Speaker 02

  What was the, what was the first, for us, it was, uh, Clover was the first department store, like, not mall departments. I guess it was kinda relatively connected to a mall.

• 31:33H. Foley?

  Clover was always, was always a tent pole in a mall. It was always the, like, it was like, at the end, the Macy's or the JCPenney's or whatever.

• 31:42Speaker 02

  Yeah, I'm trying to think of the name of this mall.

• 31:45H. Foley?

  Our Clover was attached to a Clemmons. And then it had a little mart in between, like a little, like it was a bunch of kiosks. It was phenomenal. What are you asking? What's my first what?

• 31:55Speaker 02

  That was, to me, that was the first, I mean, that was the closest one.

• 31:58H. Foley?

  Boscov's was our first one. In Wilkes-Barre. They used to do the Halloween. They'd have the witch go from across the street to the other side.

• 32:05Speaker 02

  Uh huh.

• 32:07H. Foley?

  I waited in the car. That shit scared the fuck outta me.

• 32:11Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 32:11H. Foley?

  They just had some doll on, or some dummy on a wire, but she would peek out over here and they had another lady peek out over there. Fucking. God damn it. Trauma.

• 32:22Speaker 02

  This one was off Street, off Street Road, shout out Street Road. Then it turned into a Value City than an Office Max, I believe. Uh, or a Staples.

• 32:30H. Foley?

  That sucks.

• 32:30Speaker 02

  But it used to be connected to a very small mall that was dying. There, it was always empty. Wasn't the Leo Mall was further down on Busselton. This was like the Roosevelt Mall. I forget what the fuck it was called. Um. See, if you could look up Clover Street Road, Feasterville, PA and see what mall that was. Uh, we would just go skateboarding in it. It's like young teens because-

• 32:52H. Foley?

  Inside?

• 32:53Speaker 02

  In the mall, because it was, it was so close. There was like a Jamba Juice, like a, but like a knockoff one at the end. That was it.

• 32:59H. Foley?

  That's probably awesome.

• 33:00Speaker 02

  Um.

• 33:01H. Foley?

  I always wanted to do shit like that.

• 33:02Speaker 02

  I remember the whole mall was small, like Mediterranean tiles. So we go- Like as you went, they weren't like the big-

• 33:09H. Foley?

  I got you.

• 33:10Speaker 02

  Smooth tiles.

• 33:10H. Foley?

  Damn.

• 33:11Speaker 02

  Um.

• 33:12H. Foley?

  Mediterranean.

• 33:13Speaker 02

  I don't know what that is. Clay tiles or whatever?

• 33:15Speaker 03

  Clover was either liquidated or sold and bought by the Federated Department Stores in 2005.

• 33:21Speaker 02

  Can you see what mall that was connected to though? There should be some sort of a-

• 33:24H. Foley?

  I always thought their parent company was Strawbridge and Clothier.

• 33:28Speaker 02

  Was that the case?

• 33:29H. Foley?

  I believe so.

• 33:30Speaker 02

  That's pretty good. But we-

• 33:31H. Foley?

  Because I think, I'm sorry, I think your Strawbridge's card, which only one I knew-

• 33:34Speaker 02

  Worked at Clover.

• 33:35H. Foley?

  Only one I knew had was my Aunt Colleen was talking about her Strawbridge's card. I loved it.

• 33:38Speaker 02

  Denise had one.

• 33:39H. Foley?

  Did she? Yes, your Strawbridge's card.

• 33:41Speaker 02

  Put on my Strawbridge's card.

• 33:42Speaker 03

  I believe Bucks County Mall.

• 33:44Speaker 02

  That might have been the Bucks County Mall.

• 33:46Speaker 03

  Kitty City was also a part of it.

• 33:47Speaker 02

  Yes, it was. Shout out to the Bucks County Mall.

• 33:50H. Foley?

  Let's go.

• 33:51Speaker 02

  Kitty City.

• 33:52Speaker 03

  I got a picture of the sign.

• 33:54Speaker 02

  Of what?

• 33:55Speaker 03

  Of the sign of the-

• 33:56Speaker 02

  The Clover?

• 33:57Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 33:58Speaker 02

  So, we'd go right into Clover-

• 33:59H. Foley?

  Great department. It was awesome.

• 34:01Speaker 02

  We, that was, we'd go right into Clover, bang a right snack bar, right there. She laced me with a hot pretzel out of the, out of the machine and a, and a Slurpee. Probably icy, red and blue.

• 34:13H. Foley?

  Sure.

• 34:14Speaker 02

  Uh, and-

• 34:15H. Foley?

  Because they had, the, the stand was in the middle and they had the icy spinning around at the top.

• 34:18Speaker 02

  And I, that dude-

• 34:19H. Foley?

  Polar bear.

• 34:19Speaker 02

  I'd be good in the cart for about 35 minutes, just fucking, just eating my bite and sip at an early age with a Slurpee and a pretzel. Ain't nothing better.

• 34:29H. Foley?

  Those icies would screw you sometimes though. You'd be halfway done, but you'd have no more juice.

• 34:35Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 34:36H. Foley?

  You'd have to shake it up.

• 34:36Speaker 02

  You had to keep staring. That was, that was the thing I learned at a young age. You don't churn your own butter, as we call it.

• 34:41H. Foley?

  Sure. That's when I would start dipping the pretzel in there.

• 34:44Speaker 02

  Um, but I'd be good as shit in there and then she could get it done and we'd get out. That was, but I fucking love Clover. That and then, uh, Woolworth's.

• 34:53H. Foley?

  Shout out to Woolworth's.

• 34:54Speaker 02

  Woolworth's was in the Chaminde Mall. That was the first place I seen, damn, I feel like tho- those were like Marshalls and stuff.

• 35:01H. Foley?

  Nah, Woolworth's to me.

• 35:02Speaker 02

  I mean, all those kinds of stores were, they just seemed chaotic. They had so much stuff, it seemed.

• 35:07H. Foley?

  Yeah, what killed me is Woolworth's. I believe the Woolworth's that we used to go to, they had a big garden section.

• 35:12Speaker 02

  They had a pet shop, too.

• 35:13H. Foley?

  Yeah, I didn't like the smell of the fucking gerbils in the back or the, uh, the fertilizer over in the garden section.

• 35:20Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 35:20H. Foley?

  Hated it. It was always cold and creepy.

• 35:23Speaker 02

  Uh huh.

• 35:24H. Foley?

  Wasn't a fan.

• 35:24Speaker 02

  Uh, and then here we go. Alright, this one's from Kip Van Winkle. I got a whole sear shut down, like rolled down gates and all. As a kid hiding from my mother inside the clothing rack.

• 35:35H. Foley?

  Nice.

• 35:36Speaker 02

  I mean, that's obviously the real move. That's, that's like, that, that is the best childhood move. Hiding in those clothing.

• 35:42H. Foley?

  That's a great question. What store did you get lost in? Or you, what, did you lose your parents in?

• 35:48Speaker 02

  I remember getting, ah, I forget what the fuck it was.

• 35:51H. Foley?

  Mine was a Kmart. I got lost in a Kmart and freaked the fuck out. Some neighbor found me.

• 35:57Speaker 02

  Uh, I can't recall. I remember, it might've been a Kmart. I remember it vividly. And we, somebody took our cart in the store.

• 36:07H. Foley?

  Jesus.

• 36:08Speaker 02

  I think like a guy shot, like a guy working there was like, oh, this got left or something and he moved it.

• 36:12H. Foley?

  Somebody left their bald fat kid here.

• 36:14Speaker 02

  And my mom came back and was like, they took my cart. And like yelled and we left. We left the store.

• 36:19H. Foley?

  Sure.

• 36:19Speaker 02

  And I'm like, I, I thought we had paid for it. You know what I mean? I'm like, and then I'm like, oh, that wasn't your shit. You know what I mean? You could've just put it back. Could've just got a new cart and grabbed everything in 10 minutes.

• 36:29H. Foley?

  Of course.

• 36:29Speaker 02

  Nah, she had to fucking rub it in my face.

• 36:31H. Foley?

  Speaking of retail, Patty Foley, manager at the Gap at the Wyoming Valley Mall, as you know.

• 36:37Speaker 02

  Uh huh.

• 36:38H. Foley?

  For a long time.

• 36:39Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 36:39H. Foley?

  Maybe about five, 10 years she worked there.

• 36:41Speaker 02

  That's back when the Gap was the Gap.

• 36:43H. Foley?

  Poppin'.

• 36:44Speaker 02

  That was like new, it was cool, it was like all.

• 36:47H. Foley?

  No, this is lowercase Gap. This is an uppercase Gap. This is before the Gap popped.

• 36:52Speaker 02

  It was cool then. I'm saying, yeah, that's what. But not like when it went blue. Yeah, it was like hippie-ish. Yes. Yes, thank you. Like, I'm explaining it before you cut me off.

• 37:01H. Foley?

  I apologize.

• 37:02Speaker 02

  Uh, yeah, no, it was still like under, it was like those two hippies that started it and were like, the owners were like, fucking wacky, you know, fucking smoking the devil's lettuce kinda guys.

• 37:10H. Foley?

  Yeah, it was very 3's company, like, the, it was very 70's, the paint on the walls and stuff like that.

• 37:15Speaker 02

  Uh huh.

• 37:15Speaker 03

  Donald and Doris Fisher from San Francisco.

• 37:18Speaker 02

  Yeah, they were.

• 37:19H. Foley?

  Actually started the Gap.

• 37:20Speaker 02

  Yeah, they were hippie dippies. I remember doing a project on them. Let me find out.

• 37:25H. Foley?

  Gotta be.

• 37:26Speaker 02

  More than Patty.

• 37:26H. Foley?

  Sure. I'd love her. Doing okay, though? Okay, let's talk about Factor.

• 37:33Speaker 02

  Shout out to Factor.

• 37:34H. Foley?

  One of the best in the business. The best in the business. We're talking about Factor meals, baby. Always fresh, never frozen, ready to eat in about two minutes. You throw it in the microwave, absolutely delicious. Listen, springtime's coming, everybody's busy, everybody's trying to what? Tighten it up a little bit for the summer?

• 37:49Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 37:50H. Foley?

  Factor meals, nutritious, delicious, you could do keto, you could do low carb, absolutely fantastic. Kipper likes to try the chicken taco ball. I like the, I like the rice over there. They do that mashed cauliflower rice?

• 38:04Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 38:04H. Foley?

  Woo wee!

• 38:05Speaker 02

  Yeah, they have chef-made gourmet meals that make eating well, easy, dietitian-approved, ready to heat in two minutes, so it can fuel you, you feel great no matter what life throws at you. They arrive, uh, fresh and fully prepared, perfect for any active life, active or busy lifestyle, and now you can lose up to eight pounds in eight weeks with Factor Keto Meals. Based on a randomized controlled clinical trial with Factor Keto, results will vary, obviously, depending on diet and exercise.

• 38:27H. Foley?

  Of course.

• 38:28Speaker 02

  With 40 options across eight dietary preferences on the menu each week, it's easy to pick meals tailored to your goals. Choose from the preference you like. You can do calorie smart, pro, uh, protein plus, or keto. Factors can help you, can help you feel your best all day long with wholesome smoothies, breakfast, grab and go snacks, and more add-ons. Here's the turkey. Eat smart with Factor. Get started at factormeals.com/factorpodcast. Use the code FACTORPODCAST to get 50% off your first box plus free shipping. That's code FACTORPODCAST at factormeals.com/factorpodcast to get 50% off plus free shipping on your first box. Do it.

• 39:01Speaker 04

  I don't know what I'm doing. Need a break. Forget it, I quit. Escape to Pluto TV.

• 39:06Speaker 02

  This is objectively fantastic.

• 39:08Speaker 04

  Relax into the movies and shows you already know and love, all for free. Shwing! Even our news is uplifting.

• 39:14Speaker 00

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• 39:15Speaker 04

  Watch Tommy Boy, Crazy Ex Girlfriend, Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy, The X-Files, Wayne's World, and so much more.

• 39:21Speaker 00

  We're not worthy!

• 39:23Speaker 04

  The best things on TV really are free.

• 39:25Speaker 02

  You just have to know where to look.

• 39:27Speaker 04

  Escape to Pluto TV. Stream now, pay never.

• 39:31Speaker 02

  This is another great, this is from Max. "You ever rode a kid's bike in the store, not as a kid?" That was always a good time. That, and I can't walk by one of those cages of balls without grabbing a ball and doing a fucking...

• 39:42H. Foley?

  Oh, of course.

• 39:43Speaker 02

  Doing a little fucking bread and butter.

• 39:45H. Foley?

  Would you get one of those? Would they get you one of those?

• 39:48Speaker 02

  Occasionally.

• 39:48H. Foley?

  Nah, my mom hated them. They never lasted.

• 39:51Speaker 02

  I mean, super occasionally.

• 39:53H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 39:54Speaker 02

  If it was like, she's fighting off a time bomb between me and Danny?

• 40:00H. Foley?

  Mm-hmm.

• 40:00Speaker 02

  Maybe.

• 40:01H. Foley?

  But they weren't for anything.

• 40:03Speaker 02

  No, yeah, you couldn't use them.

• 40:04H. Foley?

  Yeah, it wasn't like a basketball...

• 40:07Speaker 02

  It was literally to throw in the house and break a lamp. That's what it was for.

• 40:12Speaker 02

  Uh, it was, uh...

• 40:13H. Foley?

  They pop so easily.

• 40:15Speaker 02

  Yeah. I love the smell of them. They're more for kids. My little brother would get them and have them or whatever, and you could fucking pelt him in the head with them, and they didn't hurt.

• 40:24H. Foley?

  Sure.

• 40:25Speaker 02

  They didn't hurt, you know what I mean? So you could fucking really ping them one

• 40:27H. Foley?

  Yeah, they were alright for that.

• 40:30Speaker 03

  Fisher family is worth 4.3 billion dollars.

• 40:34Speaker 02

  All in the back of Patty's hard work.

• 40:37H. Foley?

  That's pretty good. That's alright. No shit. They don't still own it, right?

• 40:43Speaker 03

  Uh, their three sons continue to manage the business.

• 40:46H. Foley?

  Get the fuck out of here!

• 40:47Speaker 03

  I'm sure you got shareholders, but...

• 40:49Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 40:50H. Foley?

  That's pretty good. Those guys, I mean, you remember, probably when you were in middle school, I was in high school or college, I mean, they had a...

• 40:59Speaker 02

  That was in middle school, you were in college.

• 41:01H. Foley?

  Yeah, they had, when they went blue and it was like the big, the upper...

• 41:05Speaker 02

  That's all I really remember. I only know the other version from like, a book report.

• 41:09H. Foley?

  Retro shit, yeah.

• 41:10Speaker 02

  Yeah, business and business. Yeah, you had to do some sort of...

• 41:12H. Foley?

  I mean, they had a run.

• 41:17Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 41:17Speaker 03

  They're back.

• 41:18Speaker 02

  Yeah, they're back.

• 41:19Speaker 03

  Just collabed with Mad Happy.

• 41:20H. Foley?

  No shit.

• 41:21Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 41:22H. Foley?

  I gotta get over there.

• 41:23Speaker 03

  I got some of the gear.

• 41:25Speaker 02

  Some socks, see what they're hiring. Um, do you remember this, so my mall years were still pri- as your mall years were probably primed too. I'm talking like, ah, for me, mid 90s. Malls were fucking, you could, I mean, that was the hub.

• 41:45H. Foley?

  Buddy, mid 80s.

• 41:47Speaker 02

  Yeah, that's what I'm saying, that's for you, yeah.

• 41:48H. Foley?

  For sure.

• 41:49Speaker 02

  Um, do you, I think this was more 90s though. The theory, and then you would see from time to time, that stores would have real people as mannequins. Do you remember that? I think like Abercrombie did, certain places did it where like, they'd get like the hot girls from the school or whatever. They might have worked there too, and they would go put on like a dress and just like, and then move positions every like 10 minutes or something.

• 42:15H. Foley?

  Huh, surprised they didn't ask me to do that.

• 42:18Speaker 02

  Yeah, me too, with all your modeling experience.

• 42:20H. Foley?

  Sure. No, but you have to wear the clothes.

• 42:24Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 42:24H. Foley?

  Which, didn't you have to wear the clothes, didn't you have to wear Macy's clothes? How were you able to wear your dad's suit?

• 42:28Speaker 02

  You just had to wear a black suit and tie.

• 42:30H. Foley?

  Oh, you didn't have to wear the clothes from the store?

• 42:33Speaker 02

  That'd be weird if I was dressed up in a Nike fucking warmup outfit.

• 42:39Speaker 02

  That'd be insane.

• 42:42Speaker 03

  Nike tech?

• 42:43Speaker 02

  Yeah, I'm in a, I'm in a pair of 501s and a Harley-Davidson shirt, like what are you talking about?

• 42:49H. Foley?

  I thought you had to wear the clothes from the store. My mom did, they wore like Gap stuff. So people could see how it looked on you.

• 42:56Speaker 02

  Sure. Most, but the Gap only carries the Gap clothes.

• 43:01H. Foley?

  Right.

• 43:02Speaker 02

  It'd be weird if I was wearing a pair of rock ports, a bathing suit and a fucking, and a blazer from DKNY or whatever. You know what I mean?

• 43:14H. Foley?

  With a winter coat.

• 43:15Speaker 02

  Guys, if you need any advice on, uh, styling an outfit, just hit me up, obviously.

• 43:20H. Foley?

  Dressed like a crazy person.

• 43:22Speaker 02

  I got a snorkel.

• 43:25Speaker 02

  Sitting on a washing machine.

• 43:27H. Foley?

  Dry colored popcorn out of the tin.

• 43:31Speaker 02

  You guys wanna open up a credit card? I got you.

• 43:36Speaker 02

  Uh.

• 43:39H. Foley?

  Holding a spatula or something like that.

• 43:42Speaker 02

  Um, yeah, I remember that was big. And I also remember just like the malls. Cause my brothers, brother and sister were going to the mall socially when I was young. Probably, you know, that was probably like 91, 92, they would go. You know? Yeah, yeah, whatever, 93. They get dropped off at the mall or whatever. Man, just like the cult, the circle, you know, of all the kids from all the different school. I remember one kid had, he had these spice, huge spiked hairs.

• 44:09H. Foley?

  Jesus.

• 44:10Speaker 02

  What?

• 44:11H. Foley?

  He's hanging out with punk rock kids?

• 44:12Speaker 02

  No, he would just be at the mall. You would see him at the mall. We'd go to the mall once a week just to like, I don't know. I, one person out of a family of three between my mom, my dad, my stepmom, my step, somebody needed fucking something. You know, or just, oh, we'll go to the mall just to get out of the house or whatever.

• 44:27H. Foley?

  For sure.

• 44:28Speaker 02

  Kahoonaville, that was, we went to Kahoonaville in the auction rally mall.

• 44:31H. Foley?

  Oh my god, Kahoonaville.

• 44:33Speaker 02

  Shout out Kahoonaville. See if you get any eyes on that. That was great. I like the Rainforest Cafe, but I think there was only a couple of them. It's like, it was like a independent shop. Permanently closed. Fuck!

• 44:47Speaker 02

  I had a birthday at Kahoonaville. Couldn't tell me shit. Oh, it's just my family, but we celebrated my birthday.

• 44:52H. Foley?

  It's a nice burger over there.

• 44:54Speaker 02

  I think I had the chicken tend these.

• 44:56H. Foley?

  Steak fries.

• 44:57Speaker 02

  Uh, alright, this is about all just kinds of shop. This is from Harvey Never Have One Red Hoagie here. Is it garbage to deny help from an employee even though you definitely need help? I do that.

• 45:08H. Foley?

  To deny, oh.

• 45:09Speaker 02

  Like you go in, hey, can I help you with anything? Now I'm just looking and really a question of, hey, do you carry fucking scuba tanks? No?

• 45:17H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 45:17Speaker 02

  I do that.

• 45:18H. Foley?

  See, I always thought at Foot Locker that you got, that you got a bump. That like, who helped you? Kevin helped me.

• 45:25Speaker 02

  Yeah, I think certain, I think maybe like full-time employees at some point got commission. But like the part-time guy, and my buddy did it when he worked at Foot Locker.

• 45:34H. Foley?

  Did not.

• 45:35Speaker 02

  Did not. But like you needed to sell, you needed to help some, you know, they can tell how hard you're working by how many. That was the way it was explained to me, I could be wrong.

• 45:44H. Foley?

  Your name gets put in.

• 45:44Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's like, oh, you only helped three people today, whereas fucking Gary helped a hundred.

• 45:49H. Foley?

  Everybody said no. I'm just, yeah, I'm just looking. If you need me.

• 45:54Speaker 02

  Yeah, but they need, you have to go get the shoes in Foot Locker.

• 45:57H. Foley?

  Yeah, I know. Yeah, that's true.

• 45:59Speaker 02

  You know what I mean? Somebody has to go get them.

• 46:01H. Foley?

  DXL, they sometimes, they give you the full-court press. Are you sure you don't, you know, they're hanging around, that looked, that looked good on you. All right, first of all, nothing looks good on me, lady. I know you're fucking lying to me.

• 46:11Speaker 02

  Sure. They, they might work on, that might be more of a commish-based. I don't think there's a lot of part-time after-school kids working at DXL. Like, you know what I mean? Like, that would be more Macy's, Target, Best Buy. And those kids, I don't think, they don't get commish.

• 46:27H. Foley?

  I think I'd be good at DXL.

• 46:28Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 46:30H. Foley?

  I don't want that.

• 46:32Speaker 02

  But I have it, that thing stains like you wouldn't believe. That they, the wear and tear on that thing alone.

• 46:39H. Foley?

  Be good there.

• 46:41Speaker 02

  Sure, I think you would be great.

• 46:43H. Foley?

  You know, my one uncle worked, uh, was Joseph A. Bank guy. Cleaned up, was just a born salesman. My uncle's brother. By marriage.

• 46:53Speaker 02

  So just some guy, some guy you know.

• 46:56H. Foley?

  Yeah, used to move, move, move suits.

• 46:59Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 47:00Speaker 03

  DXL employees get commission.

• 47:02H. Foley?

  No shit?

• 47:02Speaker 02

  Yeah. I can tell.

• 47:03H. Foley?

  Really?

• 47:04Speaker 03

  Varying between 1.5 and 6% based on the personal sales volume.

• 47:08H. Foley?

  That's funny, cause the last.

• 47:09Speaker 02

  That's gotta be a lot on a 40-pound coat.

• 47:13H. Foley?

  That's funny, cause the last couple of times I went in, I dropped a couple of bucks there, I was loading up. And I don't remember them, like, falling over themselves.

• 47:22Speaker 03

  I think it still depends on the employee, but it seems like DXL is a pretty good commission-based system.

• 47:28Speaker 02

  I mean, but 1%.

• 47:31Speaker 02

  To get any real juice off that, you gotta be, you gotta be spending like 20 grand in there.

• 47:36H. Foley?

  I think I spent like 300 bucks, 400 bucks, last couple of times I was in there.

• 47:39Speaker 02

  That's four bucks to that guy.

• 47:41H. Foley?

  Is that all it is?

• 47:42Speaker 02

  I tell you to go suck my dick. Come in here fucking making demands and shit. I'm gonna make 450? No way.

• 47:49H. Foley?

  Is that what it is?

• 47:50Speaker 02

  A 1% of full, 1% of a hundred is a dollar.

• 47:53H. Foley?

  They gotta, that's gotta be 10%.

• 47:54Speaker 03

  Could be, no, it goes up to 6.

• 47:56H. Foley?

  6?

• 47:57Speaker 02

  Yeah. You gotta, you gotta be an earner to get, you gotta be there a long time, you gotta be Mr. DX or L to get 6%.

• 48:02H. Foley?

  It should be like 10, they should get 10%. Unless, unless they're paying them at the wazoo.

• 48:08Speaker 02

  What the wazoo?

• 48:09H. Foley?

  Give them, give them a reason to move some fucking gear.

• 48:13Speaker 02

  They, they don't need to, you're in there. You can't go nowhere else. What, you gonna walk out to fucking DL? Like, you, you need DX. You know what I mean?

• 48:23H. Foley?

  I'll go over to Urban Outfitters right now.

• 48:25Speaker 02

  What does DXL stand for? What's the D?

• 48:28H. Foley?

  Destination XL.

• 48:29Speaker 02

  Whoa.

• 48:33Speaker 03

  Location badass.

• 48:36Speaker 03

  I wish I could do a tractor beam.

• 48:39Speaker 02

  Beep, beep.

• 48:43H. Foley?

  Destination.

• 48:44Speaker 02

  Destination badass, it's great.

• 48:47H. Foley?

  No, it's Destination XL.

• 48:49Speaker 02

  My bad.

• 48:49H. Foley?

  It's also tall, too.

• 48:53Speaker 02

  Dude, that one mannequin we posted a picture of, he's like 5'2", fucking 380, that guy.

• 49:02H. Foley?

  That guy owns a cheesesteak place.

• 49:04Speaker 02

  His dad started, he's the son. Uh, alright, this is from driving, "Longtime $10 dirtbag, never had one read. Had a job at a big box store in high school as a security guard. Another kid from my school started working at the same place as a cashier. He immediately found out the override code and a list of codes for all the registers. This was a time when starter jackets and jerseys were absolutely banging."

• 49:31H. Foley?

  I know where this is going.

• 49:32Speaker 02

  Me too. "We would have kids from school," I, hold on, this is a deep text. "We would have kids from school come in at timed intervals. Grab a stack of starter gear and I would switch the cameras off the front door."

• 49:44H. Foley?

  What the fuck?

• 49:45Speaker 02

  Off the sports section, then off the cashier at the right time."

• 49:48H. Foley?

  Jesus.

• 49:49Speaker 02

  He would ring everything up. For $1 and they pay cash. There was never a trace of that person being in the store. The next day at school, these kids would give us like 50 to 100 bucks to split. Never got caught, made enough money to smoke weed for free for a couple of years through high school.

• 50:08H. Foley?

  God damn, that is fucking diabolical.

• 50:12Speaker 02

  Yes, yes.

• 50:13H. Foley?

  That's Ocean's Eleven shit.

• 50:14Speaker 02

  That's, yeah, that's wild. And this goes back to like, listen, a lot of the times, these big box stores, Foot Locker's, whatever, these mall retail places are hiring, you know, teenagers, essentially. Teenagers don't really give a, they're not morally like, I can't, they don't give a fuck about Mr. Blockbuster or whatever, and they're, they get in there and they start seeing the holes in the fucking, in the system here.

• 50:40H. Foley?

  Turning cameras off.

• 50:42Speaker 02

  Choo choo, choo choo. That's sick.

• 50:45H. Foley?

  That's nuts.

• 50:47Speaker 02

  Somebody else said, I don't know if, I don't know if I took it, but they were just like, I currently, I work in a mall and they were like, just the, uh...

• 50:55Speaker 02

  The ecosystem that goes through the mall is crazy. Like I've said before, we used to do the two for 70 deal. You go in, guy at Foot Locker, you pick out two shoes, he gives them to you in a bag, you hand them 70 bucks, I think he put 10 or 20 in the register, pocketed 50 or whatever, he'd ring you up for a doll, whatever the fuck it was.

• 51:16H. Foley?

  You think that the dollar charges would ring somebody's bell? Why would all these dollar charges?

• 51:22Speaker 02

  They didn't know though.

• 51:23H. Foley?

  I mean, we did the standard, when Best Buy was fucking up, when they first opened and they had to shit upstairs, we, we had, we had the, my buddies had the return thing going.

• 51:33Speaker 02

  Alright, this one's for Mr. Bevel Aqua, $10 man myself, great name.

• 51:37H. Foley?

  There you go.

• 51:38Speaker 02

  Is it garbage, swing through your local malls, Macy's, on your way to a date to freshen up, eh, a couple layers of cologne samples?

• 51:45H. Foley?

  Very, very, very of a couple of years ago, a lot of people were doing this. They weren't just doing it at, uh, at the perfume counter, the cologne counter, which I respect the move.

• 51:59Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 52:00H. Foley?

  Okay, I respect it, go in there, freshen up. A lot of people were going to CVS and Dwayne Reed and shit like that, going to the, and hitting the... You used to do it.

• 52:11Speaker 02

  What?

• 52:12H. Foley?

  I used to do it.

• 52:13Speaker 02

  What?

• 52:13H. Foley?

  I would go and I would, I would open up a thing of hairspray or something like that.

• 52:17Speaker 02

  Nah, but a kid I knew did it.

• 52:20H. Foley?

  I used to do it all the time.

• 52:21Speaker 02

  I never did it.

• 52:22H. Foley?

  I would grab the crew forming cream and just do my hair real quick.

• 52:26Speaker 02

  Maybe, maybe I'd do a spritz of hairspray.

• 52:28H. Foley?

  I remember being with you when we both did it.

• 52:31Speaker 02

  So, we're in there like we're in the fucking beauty ball.

• 52:35Speaker 02

  Hey, Dottie.

• 52:37H. Foley?

  And they're trimming our beards. I want to return this.

• 52:40Speaker 02

  Sorry you didn't buy this.

• 52:42H. Foley?

  It's dirtbag, it's garbage, but I love it.

• 52:44Speaker 02

  Yeah, hey, listen. That's what you gotta do, so what are you gonna, so like, what's the reality? You have a fucking, I don't know what, cologne costs, fifty dollars a bottle? Is that all right? A hundred, I don't know. I don't buy cologne, I'm not a fucking Italian.

• 52:57H. Foley?

  I love cologne.

• 52:58Speaker 02

  So just say it's fifty bucks, and you got one at home, so what are you gonna like go, you can't make it home in time? There's a Macy's around the corner or whatever? What, you're gonna go buy a fifty dollar bottle of fucking cologne? Just go, okay, test this? You know what, never mind. I'm gonna go get my dick sucked.

• 53:12H. Foley?

  You know what I love as far as cologne, and I get, uh, I get a version of this every year from, uh, one of my, uh, one of the Byrd's family, uh, one of my aunties gives it to me over there, is, um, the samples, the little tiny bottles of a, dude, that keeps you going for the whole year. You got an eclectic, they're all like little samples or little giveaways. I love that around the holidays, if you buy like a certain bottle of cologne, they'll give you like the pack with like the this and the that. I love that shit. You got like fifty different cologne little baby. It's nice.

• 53:47Speaker 02

  Uh, this is just funny, this is from McKenna. Are you garbage if your mom puts Kohl's cash in your birthday card in lieu of actual cash? That's fucking great. Know about how, when and how to spend it, baby. Uh, I've never had that, I would say yes, that is trash. Uh, but, uh, everyone in my family, big Kohl's cash.

• 54:10H. Foley?

  Love it.

• 54:11Speaker 02

  All of it, I mean, I, Denise probably, Denise is probably sitting on fucking two grand or whatever, I don't know how it works.

• 54:15H. Foley?

  He's big on Kohl's.

• 54:16Speaker 02

  Well, man, I got it at Kohl's.

• 54:18H. Foley?

  They got Sephora's in there now too.

• 54:20Speaker 02

  No shit.

• 54:22H. Foley?

  The one with, the one by us, Sephora right in the middle.

• 54:27Speaker 02

  Man, Kohl's to me was, it took me a while to realize Kohl's wasn't... At the forefront of fashion. I thought it was. I so thought it wa- I thought Sonoma, Arizona or whatever.

• 54:40H. Foley?

  Sonoma.

• 54:40Speaker 02

  I thought Sonoma was like, I'm like, you couldn't tell me shit. It took me a while to really realize, cl- and then, you know what it was? H and M for me.

• 54:52H. Foley?

  That's hot shit. That's cool guy shit.

• 54:54Speaker 02

  That was making me, that was the first time I'm like, oh, I can buy, I don't have to think, I can just buy stuff here and it's nine dollars? Great. And I'm kinda cool.

• 55:03H. Foley?

  Uh huh.

• 55:03Speaker 02

  That was the first time.

• 55:04H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 55:05Speaker 02

  Everything else, I was just wearing hoodies and jeans, like, just whatever I could get my hands on.

• 55:09H. Foley?

  H and M was legit, was legit. I was saying the Kohl's toy store, toy department, bonk, whack, stinks. No good.

• 55:17Speaker 02

  Sure, of course. They don't even do the clothes right, I would argue.

• 55:20H. Foley?

  Fair enough.

• 55:21Speaker 02

  That's just me. Uh, this one's from Ozempic Gold Medalist, ten dollar bozo. "One time I did ecstasy, went and got my haircut at the mall. It was the best haircut I ever had. Felt real good."

• 55:30H. Foley?

  I like that.

• 55:32Speaker 02

  "I've gotten my haircut at a mall before. Not my proudest moment. We did it on the road. I wanna say in Cleveland or something, which we'll be coming to."

• 55:38H. Foley?

  Haircuttery, Plymouth Meeting Mall. Sure. That's where the ladies got their cuts. Everybody in my family was getting cuts there.

• 55:43Speaker 02

  I did the haircut. It wasn't in the mall though, but shout out to a hair cutter. All the broads I grew up with started working here.

• 55:47H. Foley?

  Of course.

• 55:48Speaker 02

  "Cut my hair." Go in there, it'd be three or four of them. One of them wasn't great and you had to like slowly pivot to the other one.

• 55:54H. Foley?

  Hot tees. Love the way a beauty parlor smells.

• 55:57Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 56:00Speaker 02

  Uh, this one's a little crude, but, you know.

• 56:03H. Foley?

  Fair enough.

• 56:04Speaker 02

  It's from Aunt Toody's Boner Garage, ten dollar bozo, never ever had one read. "Is a garbage a J O in a produce fridge at Walmart? I was working at the department when I was about seventeen and walked in on a coworker tugging his root. I turned around and left immediately."

• 56:20H. Foley?

  Jesus, yeah, that's fucked up. That's bad.

• 56:23Speaker 02

  Yeah, but these are the people that you're hiring for these retail jobs. The guy who wants to whack off in the freezer.

• 56:28H. Foley?

  Produce freezer?

• 56:29Speaker 02

  I'm not judging, I'm just saying.

• 56:32H. Foley?

  I'm not saying I haven't, I haven't pulled it at work before.

• 56:34Speaker 02

  You gotta wash your, you gotta, that's why you gotta wash your produce, gang.

• 56:38H. Foley?

  I've pulled into work before, but in the bathroom, like a gentleman, not around other things. No.

• 56:46Speaker 02

  Have you ever dug your root here?

• 56:47H. Foley?

  No, I have not.

• 56:50Speaker 02

  That laughing no is always a dead.

• 56:52H. Foley?

  I haven't, I haven't.

• 56:53Speaker 02

  No.

• 56:54H. Foley?

  I might have watched a selection or two.

• 56:57Speaker 02

  Nobody, fuck you, nobody goes on the lot unless you wanna buy, big dog.

• 57:01H. Foley?

  That's not true. That's deep.

• 57:04Speaker 02

  Fucking dirtbag.

• 57:05H. Foley?

  I've never jerked off in here, not to these, I wouldn't do that to her. A goddamn ant, it's different psychologically.

• 57:12Speaker 02

  There he is, sure.

• 57:14H. Foley?

  Wouldn't do that.

• 57:14Speaker 02

  Uh huh.

• 57:16H. Foley?

  Your house I have.

• 57:17Speaker 02

  Sure, who hasn't? It's like the six string.

• 57:24Speaker 02

  Uh, this one's from Ron7, $5 goon and new to the Tron, is it garbage to take photos of all the good recipes in a cookbook at a bookstore with no intent on buying the book? Man, I can hate, I've never thought of that and I can hate it. That's brilliant.

• 57:41H. Foley?

  We haven't talked about bookstores.

• 57:44Speaker 02

  We haven't.

• 57:44H. Foley?

  Brentano's, what's it called?

• 57:46Speaker 02

  Brentano's.

• 57:46H. Foley?

  Barnes and Nobles.

• 57:47Speaker 02

  Barnes and Nobles?

• 57:48H. Foley?

  What's the other one?

• 57:49Speaker 02

  Barnes and Noble, that's the funniest video ever.

• 57:51H. Foley?

  There's Barnes and Nobles and there was another one, another big one.

• 57:54Speaker 02

  Borders.

• 57:54H. Foley?

  Borders.

• 57:55Speaker 02

  I think Borders went under if I had the guess.

• 57:57H. Foley?

  Yes, they did.

• 57:58Speaker 02

  And Amazon owns Barnes and Nobles now.

• 58:00H. Foley?

  I believe so. Man, talk about coming from the inside.

• 58:03Speaker 02

  I could be wrong.

• 58:04H. Foley?

  That's crazy.

• 58:05Speaker 02

  But, uh, yeah, I mean, that Barnes and Nobles, you know, that, we would go to that Barnes and Noble in Union Square to poop a lot.

• 58:12H. Foley?

  To poop and to sit.

• 58:13Speaker 02

  I remember one time.

• 58:15H. Foley?

  Cause they had tables.

• 58:16Speaker 02

  The, yeah, they had tables, you could go and get a cup of coffee, sit there and, but the rest of the homeless people, I remember one time, I had to go to the bathroom, so it was you, me, you and Tom, I think it was just maybe me and you, and you're like, I'll stay out front, and I'm like, I gotta go, I run in.

• 58:31Speaker 02

  And me and this homeless guy are like rushing up the escalator and I realized that he's also going to the bathroom and he's, he's got the angle on me. He's got, he's got like half a flight of stairs on me.

• 58:43H. Foley?

  Angle of pursuit?

• 58:44Speaker 02

  And they're the, they're the small, they were the small escalator so you can't even pass them. Ah, man, so like you had to get up and I'm trying to take him at the corners. It's like six escalators.

• 58:56H. Foley?

  That's killer be killed.

• 58:57Speaker 02

  And he, he got there before me and I, I had to come back down. You're like, you're done? I go, we gotta find fucking, we gotta. I probably went over that Whole Foods or whatever's right there.

• 59:07H. Foley?

  Hmm.

• 59:08Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 59:08H. Foley?

  Second best choice.

• 59:10Speaker 02

  Nah, man, it was homeless galore.

• 59:11H. Foley?

  Those guys that work in the, uh, Barnes and Noble, man, God love them.

• 59:15Speaker 02

  What?

• 59:16H. Foley?

  They just take a deal with a lot of shit.

• 59:18Speaker 02

  I know, but you go to a nice suburb, we go to one in the burbs, nice suburban Barnes and Noble, it's quiet, you're walk, it's like going back in time. You're walking around going, hey, can I help you find anything? It smells nice. They got the store beesies going.

• 59:31H. Foley?

  Sure. I just feel like people don't treat the people that work there well. You know what I mean? They boss them around and shit like that. And nobody ever knows where the fuck anything is.

• 59:42H. Foley?

  You know what I mean?

• 59:42Speaker 02

  I don't, I'm sorry. I don't, I've never been in there. People, I've more than anywhere else, I don't think. I don't think people are like specifically bossing around Barnes and Noble people.

• 59:51H. Foley?

  I always got that vibe. I always felt bad for them.

• 59:53Speaker 02

  Yeah. I mean, maybe in the city, this, but I mean, that's a little different, but I mean, you go to a nice, quiet suburb, they're, hey, they're like librarians.

• 59:59H. Foley?

  Yeah. So I was gonna say, you gotta be, you gotta, you gotta be a little intelligent to, to work at those places. You gotta know a little bit what's going on.

• 1:00:06Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:00:07H. Foley?

  I feel like people always treat them like shit.

• 1:00:09Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 1:00:09Speaker 03

  Barnes, Barnes and Noble was just bought by a hedge fund, but Amazon did take them down.

• 1:00:15Speaker 02

  Amazon took them down?

• 1:00:16Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:00:16H. Foley?

  Hedge fund, huh?

• 1:00:17Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:00:18H. Foley?

  Blackrock? Who is it?

• 1:00:19Speaker 03

  Uh, Citadel.

• 1:00:20Speaker 02

  Crack rock. Citadel. Isn't that the home and?

• 1:00:24H. Foley?

  Military school?

• 1:00:25Speaker 02

  No.

• 1:00:26Speaker 03

  Technically Elliot Advisors, but.

• 1:00:28Speaker 02

  That's no Dempsey Group.

• 1:00:30H. Foley?

  Mm-mm. Hey, when are you gonna fucking make a, make a purchase?

• 1:00:33Speaker 02

  You should make a move on this. Take the show, buy the show. We work for you.

• 1:00:38Speaker 03

  I've heard someone's up for sale.

• 1:00:41Speaker 02

  Also, if you're listening, Foley is interested in selling his steak.

• 1:00:45H. Foley?

  Like you have $1,200 on you.

• 1:00:50Speaker 02

  Just saying, um, this one is, is something that I feel, speaking of retail, needs to be appreciated. This is from JB. "I worked at a candy store right out of high school. Business was constantly so slow, so I would sit at the register and watch Netflix. I made it through all of prison breaks, Sons of Anarchy, and Breaking Bad." There's something to say for those little stores that you walk in and it's just dead and the guy, not that he doesn't give a fuck, but he's just going, "Yeah." "What do you want from me?" Yeah, like, "Guy, take a look or I'll ring you up." But like, "I ain't walking, I ain't holding your hand." How's a candy store dead?

• 1:01:32Speaker 02

  You know? Yeah, I mean, people aren't going to, I mean, I don't know. Outside the summer. Yeah. You think? I don't know. What if it was in an industrial, I don't know, foot traffic, I had a lot of shit going on. Yeah, that's the owner's problem. They just think this kid's fault. Sure. I'm just saying the fact that that is, that is a great retail job where you're like, "I'm just a body in this store, so no one robs it." Right. And I'm just watching fucking whatever all day. I respect that. That is very fucking, that is very American. "I'm just fucking here, dude. I'm collecting a goddamn paycheck." Owner will be back in a couple hours, something like that. Yeah. I don't know, man. I don't know how to work the system. Yeah, Randy's not here today. I can only ring it up. Yeah.

• 1:02:16Speaker 02

  Uh, alright, this is with SnakeWithArms. "When I worked in retail, if someone ever asked, 'Do you have any more in the back?'" I would go in the back to look, but in reality, that was a free 10-minute break and I'd just tell them no when we came back. Listen, that is a big, it took me for a long time. Would you, would you ever have anything in the back? There was no back. Everything you see is out. And people go, "No, but like, can you check?" And I go- I didn't know that. I mean, that Macy's doesn't have a back. Like, everything's out. They're not like, "Oh, you're sitting on..." I mean, may, maybe some places? Huh. But that Macy's, everything's out. Obviously, you know, at different times of my life, I was, "Hey, do you have..."

• 1:02:59H. Foley?

  You know.

• 1:03:00Speaker 02

  A larger size.

• 1:03:01H. Foley?

  Yeah. You have a, you have anything bigger in the back?

• 1:03:03Speaker 02

  You have a DXL in the back?

• 1:03:06Speaker 02

  Hey, this doesn't happen to be on top of a DXL, does it?

• 1:03:09H. Foley?

  If they would, just give me, give me a Cinnabon and I'll get out of here. You gotta get out of your hair.

• 1:03:14Speaker 02

  Hey buddy, I know you wanna finish, you're gonna finish Sons of Anarchy here, why don't you just fuck it? Why don't you just give me half of that Cinnabon, I'm about to be, I'll be on my way.

• 1:03:21H. Foley?

  You load me up with a pound of gummy colas and I'll be on my way.

• 1:03:26Speaker 02

  Um.

• 1:03:26H. Foley?

  Shout out to the gummy colas.

• 1:03:28Speaker 02

  Yeah, there was no back, which we would do if I did like ya. I could search other stores that had that product.

• 1:03:34H. Foley?

  I would. They do that, they do that at DXL. They're like, oh, we can order it for ya, or, oh, the, the store, so I'm like, ah, what? Are you outta your fucking mind?

• 1:03:48Speaker 02

  You expect me to walk there too?

• 1:03:50H. Foley?

  Seriously, I'm not fucking going to the other, no!

• 1:03:53Speaker 02

  Well, if you need it.

• 1:03:56Speaker 02

  I mean, yeah, you, listen, if you want something that... You're not like, oh my god, I see that, I need it, you're more...

• 1:04:04H. Foley?

  The only time I did that was for my wedding shirt.

• 1:04:05Speaker 02

  As Chris Cotton used to say, I'm, I'm getting, I'm getting so fat I'm getting to the point where I, I don't call them clothes, I call them fabrics. I believe that's what it was.

• 1:04:13H. Foley?

  Yeah, I'm not going to the other, that, that, don't worry about it, I'm not going to the other store.

• 1:04:17Speaker 02

  I'll just wear dirty underwear.

• 1:04:21Speaker 02

  Have a nice day. Um.

• 1:04:23H. Foley?

  Fuck that.

• 1:04:24Speaker 02

  Yeah, we were never, uh, we didn't have, the Macy's didn't have it back, I would check other stores if I liked ya and was slow and just also kinda looking for like, ah, well, it just, it'll take two minutes. I remember one time they made me call up to here, Herald Square, cuz they listed, it's also like bad, I mean, you're tracking thousands of pieces through hundreds of stores, so if it was like, it's, I was just somewhere.

• 1:04:46H. Foley?

  What'd you have, a database? Wasn't it?

• 1:04:49Speaker 02

  Hold on, hold on. Yeah, go.

• 1:04:51H. Foley?

  But wasn't it an older computer?

• 1:04:53Speaker 02

  Yeah, it was, it was one of those like, uh, fucking Accessing Pentagon Codes computers, it was like green screen, like, yeah.

• 1:04:59H. Foley?

  Oh, that, and that would come up? Hey, they have, it would be in like the green lettering and like a black thing, it was looking at, it was like concave. It looked like a TV screen.

• 1:05:09Speaker 02

  I know what you're talking about, yeah, I don't know why you keep trying to fucking explain it. I told you what it was like.

• 1:05:14H. Foley?

  And you would be able to search through that, that was connected to something?

• 1:05:18Speaker 02

  I mean, it was 2008, it wasn't...

• 1:05:21H. Foley?

  Wow, really?

• 1:05:24Speaker 02

  Yeah. I didn't know those were connected. I mean, maybe it wasn't, maybe it wasn't like The Matrix, but it was a little like, there was a bit of a screen to it. It was like a computer slash, uh, register. Yeah. Wow. So it wasn't like, you know, it was like, I wasn't running fucking Windows 2000 on it, but... But you could look up and you would see. Yeah, and it would just go, like, you would scan something and you'd like, tab over and go like, other doors, or other store, you know, inventory, or whatever, other locations. Huh. It would say, "We have none left," or whatever. Right. Or you scan and go other locations and it'd give you like, uh, Herald Square, or Neshamani Mall, or Oxford Valley Mall. And then, I remember one time,

• 1:06:08Speaker 02

  I had a call up to Herald Square, and I don't know why they just didn't fucking hang up on me. I'm like, "It says there's one of these." And whenever it says "one," it don't exist. They got it. You know, and anything under five, you're like, you're rolling the fucking, "Hey, if it's around a corner, I'd go, 'Hey, you can go look, I don't know, or maybe you can call and see if they can find them, but you can't trust these numbers." Sure. I called Herald Square and I didn't know, I'm like, "There's one." I remember being like, "Whoa, I am on the phone with New York City right now."

• 1:06:39Speaker 02

  Are any movie stars in there right now? Do you know the Kardashians? It was... Do you guys have a back?

• 1:06:48Speaker 02

  We don't have a back here.

• 1:06:52Speaker 02

  Do you know how to gift wrap? Damn, they told you how to gift wrap? Shit, how much do they pay you? At what time is it there? I think they're all millionaires.

• 1:07:02Speaker 02

  It's Tuesday here. What day is it there? You guys wear clothes? Are you in the future?

• 1:07:09Speaker 02

  You guys even wear clothes? You know Derek Jeter? Is he there now?

• 1:07:18Speaker 02

  I remember being like, whoa, I'm in business. I'm calling New York City. Oh, don't bother, we're just down here in Philadelphia, little podunk town. Some kid would shave the eyebrows and an ankle monitor on. And I remember the one girl went, how do I get to, I got the information, they tracked it down, there's one or something, they're gonna hold it, I'm like, yeah, hold it, what's your name? In Herald Square? She was gonna drive up from Philly? This is like, sometimes you get people from Philly that had never left Philadelphia. You know what I mean? And I'm like, yeah, they got one, and I was like, there's one in Herald's, I might have said Herald Square, she might have not clocked that it was New York. And then, or whatever. Kenneth Square. She knew it was New York. She goes, how do I get there?

• 1:08:02Speaker 02

  And I was like, lady, I don't fucking. If I knew how to get there, I wouldn't be working here. I wouldn't be wearing my dad's clothes.

• 1:08:10Speaker 02

  And my brother's shoes, okay, lady? Take me with you, will you? Get me out of this town. Now, if you don't mind, I have to go finish my chicken carbonara sandwich. No mushrooms.

• 1:08:24Speaker 02

  Sands, mushrooms. Ah, we gotta wrap it up, gang. Gang, we love you to death! Uh huh. We'll see you next week. Peace!