Paddy McGuinness: “I was drowning and needed help!” Raising autistic kids and clinical depression

Men are starting to open up. Presenter and comedian Paddy McGuinness used to work on building sites where vulnerability would have been seen as a weakness, but he’s seen things changing... In this chat with Fearne, Paddy talks about his own clinical depression, and what he’s learnt from therapy about keeping his mental health in check. He explains that understanding why you’re reacting a certain way will give you the power to change your behaviour. Paddy’s three children all have autism, and he’s frank about how he felt when he first got the news. He talks through the common misconceptions, and what he wishes more people understood about the realities of raising autistic children. If you liked this episode of Happy Place, you might also like: Kate Silverton https://pod.fo/e/2281ae Lucinda Miller https://pod.fo/e/264d40 Mo Gilligan https://pod.fo/e/2d3d77 Child on the line is a three-part documentary podcast series celebrating the Volunteer Counsellors of Childline, and the brave children & young people who contact the helpline service. Listen here: https://www.childonthelinepodcast.com/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy https://acast.com/privacy for more information.

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Speaker 00

  Hi, I'm Natalie Dormer and I'm proud to be an ambassador for Childline. This year, Childline turns 40. To mark it, I've made Child on the Line, a three-part documentary podcast. We hear why children needed a helpline in 1986, how it was built against the odds and the challenges children face today, from abuse and mental health to social media and AI. Search Child on the Line and listen wherever you get your podcasts.

• 0:28Fearne Cotton?

  Hey, hello, a big welcome to Happy Place. I'm Fern Cotton and today I'm chatting to Paddy McGuinness live at the Happy Place Festival at Tan Park.

• 0:38Speaker 02

  I felt like I was drowning and I needed help and I wanted someone to throw me like a lifeline and I thought, I need to speak about this because what were happening is I were going to work and you're doing shows, which is all jazz hands and no one had a clue what were going on. So I found myself getting really wound up about things and I mean like, like nothing things. And I was like, jeez, I need, I need to talk to someone about this.

• 1:07Fearne Cotton?

  How are you gorgeous people? So look, I'm now, my kids are back at school. I feel like I can sort of start to rearrange my life after them being off school for like eight weeks. I'm sort of still trying to sort my house out, which just seems to have turned into an absolute shit show over the summer holidays. So I'm reorganising things, I'm chucking, I'm sort of doing a spring clean in September. I also just turned 44, which felt kind of big. I'm not even sure why. Maybe it's the fact that it's two fours stuck together. I've had quite a year, my 43rd year. So now I'm sort of entering a new year thinking, right, new chapter, new era, what's going on here? Yeah, I'm just

• 1:49Fearne Cotton?

  trying to sort my life out. I'm also editing a new book and that is taking up a lot of my time and headspace. So I feel a bit all over the shop. Like things are still quite chaotic, but I'm hoping. As we canter through September, that I can really start to feel a little bit more organised in the head and practically and a little bit more sort of grounded, I guess. Also, change of a season, I love going into autumn. I always think I'm gonna hate it and then I get to it when all the leaves are all golden and start wearing chunky knits. Oh, fucking love it, I can't wait for autumn. Now, I know loads of you were massively excited when you saw that Paddy McGuinness was on the Tatten Park Festival line-up. He is a legend of UK TV, but we actually got quite deep quite quickly during this chat. So we talk about all things.

• 2:34Fearne Cotton?

  What I loved about this chat is Paddy, you know, before Paddy did comedy, he worked on building sites, like he's, he's had quite sort of a laddy, a laddy time. He's a working class lad from up north, brought up by a single mum, and we need more conversations on mental health with blokes. And I don't wanna say the word blokes in a sort of derogatory way, I just wanna use it to describe the sort of men that we want to be engaging with Happy Place, that we wanna come to the Happy Place Festival, that feel like it's not for them. Because I don't think that wellness has to be kind of woo-woo or weird or out of the box or just for women, it's simply about feeling alright. And Paddy does an exceptional job in this conversation at talking about his mental health

• 3:18Fearne Cotton?

  in a really beautiful, eloquent way that is so inclusive to everybody and I just love this chat, I really loved it. So we talk about his mental health and depression, we talk about him being diagnosed with clinical depression and the benefits of therapy, and we also talk about his children being diagnosed with autism. He's so honest, so open in this chat, obviously hilarious as well. We sort of swayed between laughing our heads off and, you know, really thinking deeply about things, I just adored it.

• 3:55Speaker 03

  Hi everyone, it's Katie Couric. And on my podcast, Next Question, we love stories about how women are taking control of their lives. They are increasingly leading financial decisions in their households. Yet, many say they don't feel fully prepared for the long-term financial choices ahead. Real confidence comes from knowing your financial future is protected, whatever happens. Pacific Life has helped generations protect what matters today and prepare for tomorrow with life insurance and lifetime income solutions. It's a promise Pacific Life has kept for nearly 160 years, so its customers can keep theirs.

• 4:37Speaker 03

  Ask a financial professional about how Pacific Life can help you create a more confident financial future. Pacific Life Insurance Company, Omaha, Nebraska. And in New York, Pacific Life and Annuity, Phoenix, Arizona.

• 4:53Speaker 04

  This is Nick and Jack from the best one yet. And we are excited to tell you about Walmart Business. Staying ahead of business trends means moving fast and adapting quickly. Walmart Business helps you simplify operations so you can focus on building the next big thing.

• 5:06Speaker 05

  Find exactly what your organization needs with their ever-expanding business assortment and everyday low prices. Keep your momentum going fast with reliable shipping and fulfillment.

• 5:14Speaker 04

  Eligible organizations can take advantage of tax-free shopping, both in-store and online, saving you more while getting you everything you need. It's Walmart built for your business. Sign up for a free Walmart Business account today at business.walmart.com.

• 5:29Speaker 06

  When you're running a growing business, the right systems can unlock your full sales potential and make fulfilling every order effortless. Switch to ShipStation before peak season so you're prepped and ready before the rush hits. ShipStation connects Shopify, Amazon, TikTok Shop, and over 200 more marketplaces with one platform that does it all. You can manage orders, sync inventory, track returns, all automatically. Everything your operation needs, all in one place. Upgrade your shipping operations to stress-proof your biggest sales days and capture every bit of potential revenue. Go to shipstation.com and use code AUDIO and get 30 days free.

• 6:02Fearne Cotton?

  Right, let's get to the Tatten Park Festival tent. Here's the show.

• 6:27Fearne Cotton?

  Hey!

• 6:28Speaker 02

  Hello! Hello! Hello! Hello!

• 6:31Fearne Cotton?

  Hello, Pat.

• 6:32Speaker 02

  Are you alright, are you okay?

• 6:33Fearne Cotton?

  Come and have a sip!

• 6:35Speaker 02

  Oh... Hello, everyone! I've seen the most northern thing ever when I walked in here today. It was five ladies lay on their back doing yoga in the rain. Literally getting wet through... We've paid our money, we're enjoying it!

• 6:55Fearne Cotton?

  It's so good!

• 6:56Speaker 02

  I know!

• 6:56Fearne Cotton?

  Have you done yoga before, Paddy?

• 6:57Speaker 02

  I've not, but I wanna get into it.

• 6:59Fearne Cotton?

  Yeah.

• 7:00Speaker 02

  I'm told, because I'm 52 now, you're not, I am. Um... And I'm told flexibility is key as you get older.

• 7:09Fearne Cotton?

  Key.

• 7:09Speaker 02

  So, that is the one that I'm gonna start having a look at. But there's loads of different ones.

• 7:13Fearne Cotton?

  There's all sorts of yogas.

• 7:14Speaker 02

  There's like hot yoga and... Which one have you done? Have you done a... You must have done loads.

• 7:19Fearne Cotton?

  I like Vinyasa yoga is the one for me. It's like very flowy, fluid yoga. I think you'd like that.

• 7:25Speaker 02

  Right, okay, yeah. But I definitely, definitely need to work on the flexibility. I'm knackered.

• 7:30Fearne Cotton?

  Yeah, well, it is, it's harder as you get older.

• 7:32Speaker 02

  Course it is!

• 7:33Fearne Cotton?

  Can you touch your toes?

• 7:34Speaker 02

  Uh... I don't, I don't think it can...

• 7:37Fearne Cotton?

  Give it a go, let's try.

• 7:38Speaker 02

  I can sort of... That's about my limit there.

• 7:41Fearne Cotton?

  Oh, come on! Yeah! Not bad going!

• 7:43Speaker 02

  Apologies! Just realised, I was over my... We've not paid our money for this!

• 7:50Fearne Cotton?

  And that's not bad!

• 7:51Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's alright.

• 7:52Fearne Cotton?

  Not bad at all. I mean, we're up your neck of the woods, so this is perfect for you, isn't it?

• 7:57Speaker 02

  It's brilliant. This is 25 minutes from my house.

• 8:00Fearne Cotton?

  Lovely.

• 8:01Speaker 02

  And Tattenberg, because I bring the kids here. It's a brilliant place. They've got all the firm, the top men, they've got a brilliant playground over there and what have you. So, it's handy for us. This is, since our last time I was here, I did a... An outdoor show with Lee Francis, who's Keith Lemon, we did the movie show live here and it was brilliant. So it's always good up here, everyone always comes out and gets behind you, yeah.

• 8:23Fearne Cotton?

  It's so nice, I mean as you can see and as you've experienced watching people doing yoga in the rain, it's a, you know, a big celebration of wellness, which I think is no more complicated than just simply feeling alright, feeling well. Do you feel well at the moment?

• 8:38Speaker 02

  Uh, yeah I do, I mean the usual stuff, you know, some days you wake up and you feel like a million dollars and other days you feel like crap, you know, like we all do depending on... I mean last night, my youngest, Felicity, had a toothache, so I was up all night. Uh, and then I got back from my show this morning and she's feeling better now, but her friend's at the house now, so all's out all morning was, "I'm known as Felicity's dad in the house."

• 9:10Fearne Cotton?

  Obviously.

• 9:10Speaker 02

  "Felicity's dad, will you do this? Felicity's dad, will you do that?" So knows I'm here, I'm gonna stretch this out.

• 9:17Fearne Cotton?

  Okay.

• 9:19Speaker 02

  This is gonna be the longest podcast ever, because I don't have to deal with being Felicity's dad for a bit.

• 9:27Fearne Cotton?

  Do you want me to call you Felicity's dad during the chat? Is that helpful?

• 9:30Speaker 02

  That'd be odd, but yeah.

• 9:33Fearne Cotton?

  Um, well look, we're so happy to have you here, even on no sleep at all.

• 9:37Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 9:38Fearne Cotton?

  I know you've been on your own sort of, I don't love the word journey, but you have been on your own journey with your mental health.

• 9:45Speaker 02

  Uh, yeah, I think, um, it's a strange, because where I was brought up in Bolton and the life I had before, you know, you become a celebrity, if you like. Uh, I've done loads of different jobs and very male-dominated, you know, building sites and engineering places and all that sort of thing and it genuinely was that kind of, no one ever spoke about anything. And I think, you know, when I speak with my mates now, I've noticed those lads who were all still in the building game and, you know, that sort of like real macho kind of appearance.

• 10:26Speaker 02

  They have a hundred percent changed, they speak differently now and they talk about things a bit more openly and it sounds that, you know, sometimes it's a little bit saccharine saying, you know, you should talk about it, you should open up and what have you, but when I first ever went to therapy, which was, uh, god, about four or five years ago, I honestly felt like, god, I wish I'd have done this sooner. It was like a weight off your shoulders. I don't know if anyone's ever been to anything like that or, you know, where you're sort of sitting in front of a complete stranger really and you're telling them things that you just wouldn't tell your best friend. But it's really cathartic and

• 11:11Speaker 02

  it's, um, I definitely recommend it. It changed everything for me. Just to offload stuff and getting an opinion that isn't biased, you know, because your friends, if you offload to your friends and they'll go, they'll side with you a lot of the times, they'll go, oh, you're right, yeah, and this is, that's the problem. It's not you or whatever it might be. But I found that the advice I were given and just talking, it just, it just really opened my eyes to a lot of things. Even, even when I'm out in the car, you know, and we've all had it where someone cuts in front of you or whatever and you, but even that, you

• 11:51Speaker 02

  know, just, I look at that differently now. It's, uh, you know, I'm not perfect. I don't walk around every day sort of like smelling flowers and, you know, in long white robes and what have you, but, uh.

• 12:04Fearne Cotton?

  That is the sign of a sane person, very much so.

• 12:08Speaker 02

  Yeah, but, uh, but, you know, I just kind of look at things differently.

• 12:12Fearne Cotton?

  Yeah. No, I totally hear you. I go to therapy every week. I wouldn't miss it. I, I love it. I don't know about you, but I found one of the most helpful things was someone validating how I was feeling. Cause I would always go, oh no, don't be upset about that or don't be angry about that. You're really lucky, you know, you love your job, you've got your kids, you know, I would sort of suppress things because I thought I shouldn't be looking at it, which is actually the opposite of true. We should be. Feeling our emotions and going, "Yeah, I'm really angry about this." And not to stay in that emotion, but to recognise it at least. That, for me, was really helpful.

• 12:47Speaker 02

  Yeah, I also think when you understand something, it's easier to realise you don't have to react a certain way. You know, I realise I'm probably gonna lose about 80% of the room here, but I'm gonna talk about golf. But it's like, when I first started playing golf and I was rubbish at it, and, "Oh, I hate this game." And then I got a few lessons. When I understood, it didn't make me any better, I was still rubbish, but I understood why I was rubbish. And it made me just enjoy the game, even though I still couldn't do the shot. Because I knew why that shot wasn't going right, I just started enjoying it more, and that's literally therapy for me. You're kinda going, so it's not as though all your problems are gonna go away,

• 13:31Speaker 02

  but you can look at them in a different way and sort of react differently.

• 13:37Fearne Cotton?

  Yeah, I've never weaved golf into a mental health chat before, I enjoyed that.

• 13:41Speaker 02

  No, no, yeah, welcome to the north.

• 13:45Fearne Cotton?

  So good. But I totally understand what you're saying. A lot of the time, we don't know why we're reacting in a certain way. We have no clue why we're angry constantly about the same thing or triggered by something. And I think getting to know yourself as you get older is so important.

• 14:01Speaker 02

  It is, and I think, you know, with social media now, and you look at the world and what's going on, and I think we're sort of, we're open to more things now, we see more things. When I was a kid, you know, in our house, with my mum in Bolton, you kinda, there was like, the mirror and the sun. Those were the newspapers that were in the house. So that's kind of the world, really, what you saw in the news at 10. And for me, growing up, you know, I never took any notice of any of that. But now, whether you sort of keep an eye on the news or not, you're sort of bombarded by it. It can feel like all encompassing, it can feel like everything's negative and everyone's against each other and everything else. And that's why I love anything like this live.

• 14:46Speaker 02

  And even when I'm touring doing, say, stand-up, people on the hall are all right. And when they get together, you know, we have a nice time, you see people and you chat and what have you, and kinda... I feel as though it's quite an optimistic view, but you know, you can get in your car and drive home and there's no one sort of purposely running you off the road and you know, there's like oil drums on fire and oh, you know, we're not there, but it feels like that sometimes. It feels like we're all against each other, but actually people kind of get on most of the time.

• 15:19Fearne Cotton?

  Yeah, oh my God, I've walked around all weekend, I've met only lovely people. There are no dickheads here. I've done a survey, I've done a survey, there are none, there are none.

• 15:27Speaker 02

  Stick around till after 10 o'clock tonight, the pub's starting closing.

• 15:31Fearne Cotton?

  Yeah, exactly. No, it's so lovely. I mean, you, you've talked about this publicly, but you were diagnosed with clinical depression.

• 15:37Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 15:38Fearne Cotton?

  How did that change things, having a label to it?

• 15:41Speaker 02

  Um, firstly, a shock, because I think with depression, personally, you know, you don't realise it, it's sort of people around you, your friends and your family, who will kind of, oh, you're not yourself today, or you're reacting a little bit differently. And me, at the time, when it started creeping, you know, my children were, me, Leo and Penelope, my first twins, were diagnosed with autism, and that was a lot to take on and to sort of compute, because before you have children, as, as, this is me speaking as a bloke, you

• 16:20Speaker 02

  have an idea in your head of how it's gonna be. So, you know, on the park, a game of football, or you're gonna go here and you do that, you do this, and then all that, all of a sudden, all changes. So, I didn't realise how much that started creeping into my mind and how sort of, just how upset I was at the time and not being able to deal with things and what have you. So, you throw yourself into work and you, you know, like most people, you think, oh, I've got to, I've got to provide for my family and I've got to try and get as much as I can now, because, you know, these children are gonna need as much support

• 17:01Speaker 02

  as possible. But at the time, thinking financially, you know, but obviously we know that isn't the answer to everything. Um, and then it slowly, must have just crept up on me, and I, again, I didn't realise it, and it was talking to my ex-wife one day at home, and we were talking about therapy and what have you. And again, for me, I was like, ah. Don't need that, you know, but we sorted it out and I went to, I went to the priory actually, which is, because a lot of people think of the priory as a sort of, you know, they deal with alcohol addiction and drug addiction, there's lots of it, but they do loads of stuff.

• 17:43Speaker 02

  At the priory and I went there and that and started talking to this therapist and it was kind of all right. But didn't really work for me and and this is another thing I say to people when they're thinking about doing something like that is it's not a quick fix. The person you're talking to might actually be the world's best therapist, but they're just not right for you.

• 18:05Fearne Cotton?

  Yeah.

• 18:06Speaker 02

  So I saw two different therapists and I thought, I'm I'm wasting my money here and then. It was one of those, someone got in touch, went, there's this guy at the priory and he said he'll see you. And I was like, oh God, all right, I'll give it a go this last, this last time. And honestly, after that first hour. I felt, I felt just light. I felt like I got so much off my chest and and. You know, talking about my children and autism and my life and and there's no two ways about it. The job that we do. Isn't a normal job, you know what I mean? So coming from a working class background and how I was brought up.

• 18:49Speaker 02

  To people recognizing, you know, because you see all the the good trappings, you know, a nice car and house and all that usual things when people, you know, do well. But everything else, I'd never ever had any sort of advice or help with that. I just kind of got on with it right from Phoenix nights, really. So there was a lot had built up in my mind and like I say, that guy. Doctor Shire is called if you ever want to go to the priory, he's amazing. Um, but. He was brilliant and I saw him consistently, once a week for about, oh god, probably about six months. And in the end, I remember him sort of going like, not, you're okay now,

• 19:34Speaker 02

  but he's like, look, you know, you, let's make it once a month. And I was going, oh no, because you're me mate now. You know, I actually looked forward just to seeing him and having a bit of a chat and what have you. Um, and now, what's brilliant with Dr. Sharr is like, I'll just WhatsApp him now and again. And I'll say, you know, uh, how are you doing? He's, he alright? He's go, yeah, you're okay. And he'll go, do you, do you, yeah, wanna come back? And I'm going, no, I'm alright at the minute. But if I do, I'll go in and see him. But because I can manage it now, a little bit better, you know, it's nice not thinking, I must, I must go. It's like, if it's there, I can go.

• 20:13Fearne Cotton?

  So do you know when you're headed towards a bad patch? Can you feel it happening? Are there signs?

• 20:18Speaker 02

  Um, I suppose, you know, you can probably be irritable, but you don't realise that. So I sort of think to myself, I might be in a situation and something will happen. It's not anything major, but I'll think to myself after, could have handled that a bit better. You know what I mean? And it won't be anything, like I said, a big situation. But just to me, I think, why have I done that like that? Or why have I spoke like that when I could have done it like this? And that's when I start thinking about it. But because I recognise it, I can figure it out myself these days, you know?

• 20:54Fearne Cotton?

  And how do you do that? Because, you know, like you touched on a moment ago, our job isn't conducive to good mental health. Shock horror. Um, it's like, it's not normal and you are dealing with a lot of outside opinion and there's not much room for error because everyone's straight on you. How do you navigate all of that well?

• 21:12Speaker 02

  Well, you know, these things still surprise me now. When we talked about social media before, so there's this thing now called clickbait. So you'll see a story online about someone that's really sensationalised. And when you click on it, it's usually nothing.

• 21:26Fearne Cotton?

  Nothing, yeah.

• 21:27Speaker 02

  And that's become a thing at the minute. But because of everything with the therapy and doing stuff over the last few years, I can smile at that now. Like, for instance, this is a true story. A couple of weeks ago, so I do a show on radio two every Sunday morning, 11 till 1.

• 21:44Speaker 02

  And there's a little car park at the studios, so I parked my car, I get out, pay for a ticket, put it in my car, walk into the studios, right? Now unbeknownst to me, there's a paparazzi taking photos of this. The mail online then put it straight to the line and go, Paddy McGuinness looking glum.

• 22:05Fearne Cotton?

  Brilliant.

• 22:06Speaker 02

  Now, who pays for a parking ticket? Like that?

• 22:13Speaker 02

  It's, it's the biggest head wreck ever and you, and that's where you go, what? You know, I'm paying for a parking ticket like.

• 22:23Fearne Cotton?

  That's sad.

• 22:23Speaker 02

  You know, I remember I was driving the car once and they took a photo of me in my car going, looking serious. I'm like, I'm just driving to the shop.

• 22:30Fearne Cotton?

  Navigating around about.

• 22:32Speaker 02

  In fact, if I see someone behind the wheel of a car like this, I'm avoiding them.

• 22:38Fearne Cotton?

  Yeah, worrying.

• 22:39Speaker 02

  But, but that is one of the mad things now with the job and it's turning so quickly where, you know, because obviously things like online news outlets, it's all about making money and they get money by clicks. But stuff like that, I think even two year ago would have absolutely drove me mad. But now I just like, I can just have a laugh about it and think, oh, clowns.

• 23:03Fearne Cotton?

  Yeah, clowns. It's the only way. Otherwise you'll drive yourself absolutely mad worrying about what everybody's thinking and talking about and it's just absolutely maddening.

• 23:12Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 23:12Fearne Cotton?

  I mean, you mentioned this a moment ago, you made the most beautiful documentary about autism involving your children. And I mean, it was shot beautifully too, because you've kept your children completely private throughout the whole process, but managed to talk about it so intimately. And I think it's obviously been hugely helpful to so many other families out there, people navigating it. When you first had that diagnosis for your twins of autism, I know that you said you were scared of the word, scared of the subject. What, what was it that scared you?

• 23:43Speaker 02

  Uh, well, it's, it's having no idea what it was, you know, I'm like most people, I were brought up, you know, I was born in 73, kind of had my A day in the eighties. And in the eighties, the only, you know, thing about autism that I remember, which will be formative years, was like the film Rain Man. Which makes out all autistic people just go to casinos and are brilliant at gambling, which is obviously complete bollocks. Because I used to take me son to the bookies every Saturday.

• 24:13Speaker 02

  But it's a, but, but, so you kind of have this idea of what it is. Yeah. Which is nothing like what it is. So dealing with all that, which is a lot for any parent. Um, and then having the therapy and understanding it and just learning more and more about it. That documentary, when we discussed doing it, it, it literally took to make probably about four years. Really? Because from the initial thought, I was, I was like, I felt like I was drowning and, and I needed help. And I, I wanted someone to throw me like a, a, a lifeline. And I thought, I need to speak about this because what were happening is I were going to work and you, you know,

• 24:57Speaker 02

  you're, you're doing shows, which is all jazz hands. Yeah. And you're dealing with management and different things and no one had a clue what were going on. So I found myself getting really wound up about things. And I mean, like, it sounds very Mariah Carey this, but it's like, you know, if the car what was supposed to be taking me somewhere wasn't there, like nothing things. And I was like, jeez, I need, I need to talk to someone about this. So the, the idea of the documentary was really originally to try and get some help. And then as the years went on and I, I, and I've always got me children's, it's not up to them that we're doing a documentary.

• 25:41Speaker 02

  So we're conscious of bringing that into their life. So that's why I, we both chose never to show the face. But we, we felt they had to have a presence in that documentary because, you know, this is what we're talking about. But, um, what I found, and even to this day, Luke, I were walking around there earlier on, uh, before I saw you and a couple stopped me, you're probably in the audience now. Who asked me, oh, they're over there, hello there, hello there. Who, who, who said, you know, their child's autistic and they were asking, talking about the documentary and what have you. Now, that's all those years later. So I feel as though

• 26:21Speaker 02

  kind of like, it feels like a little bit of community of mums and dads helping each other because that's what it's all about regardless of what's going on in your life. If you can help each other out, it's a godsend. And again, for me, speaking about it publicly, it was a chance to show all my friends and family, all those times, my mates would go, oh, he never comes out. Or why are you not going here? Or we're going doing that. And you're that person in your group who's the miserable get, you know, not want to do anything. But it was almost like going, Luke, this is why now I can't just do that. Or this is why I've not had you over at the house. Because I'm dealing with things and things have to be done in a certain quite calm and peaceful. Now,

• 27:07Speaker 02

  now, my kids now flipping heck, like the house is absolute chaos, but in a good way. You know, because when they were first diagnosed, I was like, grab it, everything quiet. And we've got to do it a certain way. But anyone with children with autism will know every child with autism is different. Of course, yeah. So it's not a one thing is good for everyone. And now, weirdly, it just doesn't even come into my head anymore, you know, even if like my youngest Felicity, you know, has a meltdown or anything like that, it kind of like years ago before documentary and therapy and everything, I'd be like, I can't cope with this. I need to escape. I cannot deal with this.

• 27:51Speaker 02

  To know, it's like, I couldn't give a monkey's, you know, it is what it is kind of thing, you know, even when we're out and about and what have you. We just, we went to Menorca a few weeks back. And even that now, when we were coming back on the plane, I was talking to Christine about it, I was going, can you believe we do this now? Because going to an airport with, with children with autism, I mean, listen, anyone with kids, it's stressful going on holiday anyhow, regardless. It needs a new, it shouldn't be called a holiday. It's not, it's not a holiday. No, not at all. Give it a new name. Not at all, yeah, but it's, um. But, you know, you can times that by a hundred.

• 28:33Fearne Cotton?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 28:33Speaker 02

  Um, so this is why things like the lanyard scheme, uh, it's amazing that scheme, you know. When you're at an airport and you've got your lanyards on and your children have got your lanyards on, hidden disabilities. It is, it's so good to see it's heartening and that's at both sides, you know, when we're coming back from Spain and what have you. But, but like I say, when they're on the plane now, you know, like most kids have got bloody iPad or the phone or the colouring or whatever. And all those stresses and anxiety, I don't even think about now. And like you say, you've got, God, how far we've come, but that's. You've got to put a lot of work in.

• 29:09Fearne Cotton?

  Of course.

• 29:10Speaker 02

  But if you do that with any child, you're gonna reap the, the benefits later on anyhow.

• 29:16Fearne Cotton?

  And I guess because you feel like, you know, you've, you've talked about this publicly, there is a community out there, there are parents that wanna have this conversation. You don't feel so alone in it. I think that's the issue with any scenario in your life where you feel like this is just me going through this, no one gets it. Now you've got, you know, a whole group of people that wanna have a really great conversation about this subject.

• 29:39Speaker 02

  Absolutely. You know, e- e- even amongst my own friends as well, you know, we talk about things and they'll, they'll ask me questions, you know, and it's. It's really refreshing, but even now, like, like the couple over there and online. People will message me and go, uh, you know, what's your documentary? We do this now, you know. It's a shame in this country, sometimes it's a little bit of a postcode lottery with what helps available, what helps not available. And that's whether you're private or not.

• 30:08Fearne Cotton?

  Yeah.

• 30:08Speaker 02

  Um, so that's a shame. That'd be nice to change eventually. But, uh, just talking about things and, and knowing you're not on your own, you, you're not that one person who's sat there. You know, in tears. Not knowing which way to turn, you know, other people have been in that exactly the same position and it's, it's just nice knowing people have got your back.

• 30:33Fearne Cotton?

  Yeah. What do you think the biggest misconceptions about autism are?

• 30:37Speaker 02

  Uh, well, I, I, I think sometimes, you know, we're talking about meltdowns, um. So, uh, uh, don't confuse a meltdown with a tantrum. Cause comparing a meltdown to a tantrum is like comparing a candle to an oil rig fire.

• 30:55Fearne Cotton?

  Yeah.

• 30:55Speaker 02

  Right? They're, they're two different things. And what used to happen sometimes, if that happened when we were out and about, people would look and, and think spoiled. Or bratty, you know, because they wouldn't understand. And I used to get so wound up because I'd wanna go, no, actually, what's happening here? But you, you can't do that, you know what I mean? So I think that's one of the, the biggest ones for me were people presume. They're just, they're just being spoiled and just kicking off, you know what I mean? And it isn't the case.

• 31:27Fearne Cotton?

  Yeah. And because you have to bear in mind the sensory element to,

• 31:30Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 31:30Fearne Cotton?

  you know, children that are neurodivergent, it, everything feels different. And that means that, you know, coming to something like this or going to the airport, you've got to put prior thought to all of it.

• 31:41Speaker 02

  I remember being with my little lad, uh, he was only about four at the time and we'd stopped at a motorway services and he wanted a wee. And we're in the toilets and, uh, someone just turned the hand dryer on and my son absolutely lost it, you know? And that's one of those things where I, I felt myself getting annoyed at the person who put the hand dryer on, but it's totally not. He's, he's just, he's just drying his hands.

• 32:04Fearne Cotton?

  Yeah.

• 32:05Speaker 02

  So that was another thing to kind of think, you can't go out and presume everyone knows everything, you know what I mean? It, it's just never gonna happen like that. But again, with my son, what I'd do is I'd, I explained what it was and, and luckily I can make my kids like, I, we usually have a good laugh. And I can try and make something funny and now if we go out and we're in a public bathroom or anything at all and someone's put the hand dryers on. It literally isn't an issue anymore.

• 32:37Fearne Cotton?

  Yeah.

• 32:37Speaker 02

  But if I'd have gone to him, that's never gonna happen again and it wouldn't have benefited him. So it, it's not a case of like, um. You know, if you're scared of flying, you're like, you must get on a plane. It's, you know, slow baby steps, but you can get there with it.

• 32:54Fearne Cotton?

  Yeah, exactly. And it's finding the coping mechanisms that work for you as a parent and also then the ones for the kids that enable them to navigate it all as well.

• 33:07Speaker 07

  Confidence. It's listening to your gut. It's moving forward even when the path ahead is unclear. For nearly 160 years, Pacific Life has helped people keep their promises, building confidence for generations. Whether you're confident in your financial future or just beginning to envision it, we're here to help. Ask a financial professional how. Pacific Life, the power of a promise. Pacific Life Insurance Company, Omaha, Nebraska, and in New York. Pacific Life and Annuity, Phoenix, Arizona.

• 33:41Speaker 04

  This is Nick and Jack from the best one yet, and we are excited to tell you about Walmart Business. Staying ahead of business trends means moving fast and adapting quickly. Walmart Business helps you simplify operations so you can focus on building the next big thing. Find exactly what your organization needs with their ever-expanding business assortment and everyday low prices. Keep your momentum going fast with reliable shipping and fulfillment. Eligible organizations can take advantage of tax-free shopping, both in-store and online, saving you more while getting you everything you need. It's Walmart built for your business. Sign up for a free Walmart Business account today at business.walmart.com.

• 34:17Speaker 08

  500 orders a month was manageable. 5,000 is madness. Embrace intelligent order fulfillment with ShipStation, the only platform combining order management, warehouse workflows, inventory, returns, and analytics in one place. What used to take five separate tools, ShipStation does in one. Automate fulfillment and rate shopping to ship up to 15 times more with up to 90% savings. Go to shipstation.com and use code AUDIO to try ShipStation free for 60 days.

• 34:49Speaker 09

  At Lowe's, this Veterans Day and every day, military members, veterans and their spouses get automatic Milo's Rewards Silver Status Benefits. Plus, 10% off eligible purchases with no annual limit. It's one way we honour and give back to those who have served and still do. Learn more and verify now at Lowe's.com/military. 10% discount can't be combined with another offer. Exclusions, terms and conditions apply. Loyalty programmes subject to terms and conditions. Details at Lowe's.com/terms. Subject to change.

• 35:20Fearne Cotton?

  There's so much to take on, and like you said earlier, dealing with your own mental health alongside this, it's a lot. Like, most people that have come here, we've all got stuff going on in our lives, things that we're, you know, dealing with in our heads that nobody else knows about. You've also got this, you know, extraordinary job, and a lot of it is about entertaining other people and making them laugh. Does that, or has that at periods, felt jarring, that you're feeling like shit and you've got to go out and make people feel happy?

• 35:48Speaker 02

  Yeah, I remember when that really kicked in is probably at the back end, last probably two or three series of doing Take Me Out, which is obviously a big Saturday night dating show, a lot of fun, party atmosphere. And sometimes I'd be in the dressing room, literally dealing with something on the phone at home, and stressing about it. And I think your mind's a powerful tool, it makes everything worse. You know, every problem's magnified a million times, and I would always murder going, worst case scenario with everything. And then you go out there and you do the show and you come off, and I'd be knackered and, because I'm like mentally burnt out.

• 36:32Speaker 02

  But again, all those little things like I spoke about before, they all helped depression come to the front, you know. They're all little chinks in the armour that were slowly being eroded that I didn't realise. But again, on the positive, the job is brilliant for then talking about things.

• 36:54Fearne Cotton?

  Yeah.

• 36:55Speaker 02

  Because you're going to reach more people and you're going to sort of make more people aware. So I take the positives out of things like that now.

• 37:03Fearne Cotton?

  Yeah, it's great, because it is quite draining. I remember when I was on Radio 1 and I was having a bad mental health blip. And I just knew I had to sort of click into acting somewhat. I don't feel like I have to do that in this space if I'm feeling great or not great. It's sort of irrelevant because we'll talk about it anyway, we'll be honest about it. But you know, there's no room to do that on the radio, no room to do it as a stand-up or if you're doing a TV show. You do have to switch it on and then I think you've got to watch your energy levels. You know, it's so tiring to keep acting all the time. But you know, it's part of your job. You have to click into it.

• 37:38Speaker 02

  Yeah, and I think, you know, obviously we're talking before about social media and there is a lot of negativity with social media. But also, again, not everyone's bad on there and it's great for reaching people as well. So, and now we're in a space and time in the world where you can go online, you could totally go online to and go, I've had a really bad day today and put it out there and you'll have, you know, loads of people getting in touch with you. People who've had a bad day get in touch with you and then people get in touch with them. And that's what's lovely about social media. You know, they're still more good than bad, even though it doesn't feel like it at times.

• 38:18Fearne Cotton?

  Yeah, no, I agree. And what do you do just to keep yourself mentally feeling well? Are there non-negotiables that you have to have in place so that you can, you know, be the dad you want to be, go out and do the job and really, really enjoy it?

• 38:31Speaker 02

  Gin.

• 38:32Fearne Cotton?

  Gin or gym?

• 38:33Speaker 02

  No.

• 38:35Fearne Cotton?

  Gin.

• 38:36Speaker 02

  Definitely gin. No, um, I don't, I think, all my life, weirdly, even though this job I do is a real sort of, you're out there and you're in front of people all the time. I've always been, right from school, really shy, like really shy. If I used to be five minutes late for a class, I'd never go in. I couldn't bear the thought of walking through the door and everyone looking up at me because I was late. It just used to drive me mad. And now, I've sort of, after, God, however long it's been, I've been doing this for a living, well over 20 years, I've finally got to the stage where

• 39:20Speaker 02

  Sometimes I feel as though I don't have to do things because of my job. So, you know, whatever, you get invited to a cinema premiere or a red carpet doing, I'm like, I cannot be arsed.

• 39:33Fearne Cotton?

  Never.

• 39:34Speaker 02

  I am happiest on the couch.

• 39:36Fearne Cotton?

  Same.

• 39:37Speaker 02

  Ice Road Truckers, lovely.

• 39:39Fearne Cotton?

  Is that your thing?

• 39:40Speaker 02

  Or America's toughest prisons.

• 39:42Fearne Cotton?

  What jolly viewing.

• 39:44Speaker 02

  Well, I'm not there, so that's good. Um, but, but, but, but I just love being at home. I love being around my kids. It, I, I, I've got to sometimes do things to get myself out of that because I've come a bit too insular then.

• 39:59Fearne Cotton?

  Yeah, me too.

• 40:00Speaker 02

  But I do love, you know, being at home. It's amazing.

• 40:03Fearne Cotton?

  I mean, we're selling these socks here that say on them, happy little hermit, because that's what many of us are. Loving a little hermit at home.

• 40:09Speaker 02

  Yeah, oh, love it.

• 40:10Fearne Cotton?

  There's nothing better.

• 40:11Speaker 02

  Door shut, especially at winter, fire on.

• 40:13Fearne Cotton?

  Yeah.

• 40:14Speaker 02

  Telly.

• 40:15Fearne Cotton?

  Yeah.

• 40:15Speaker 02

  One of them to the outside world.

• 40:16Fearne Cotton?

  Absolutely. My addition to that is shut the door, that to the world, TV on, bra ra.

• 40:23Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 40:24Fearne Cotton?

  Oh, that is the best feeling ever. Unrivaled feeling, everyone.

• 40:28Speaker 02

  Me too.

• 40:29Fearne Cotton?

  Yeah, love it. No one wants to relax in an underwired bra?

• 40:33Speaker 02

  No, no, no, absolutely.

• 40:35Fearne Cotton?

  But, but, but fitness has come into your life in quite a big way, hasn't it?

• 40:39Speaker 02

  Yeah. I, I, do you know, it, it's funny, like, when you do stuff, I'm not, I'm not a person who's up in the morning weighing out, you know, an ounce of mung beans and, you know, and making sure my waters at a certain temperature. I kind of feel as though, you know, if I have, like, for instance, yesterday, uh, uh, my cousin came over with her husband and my brother and his wife and what have you, and I, I literally got like a big Greg's in, big Greg's shop.

• 41:04Fearne Cotton?

  Yeah.

• 41:04Speaker 02

  Every steak, bake you can think of, cakes, everything, great.

• 41:09Fearne Cotton?

  Yeah.

• 41:10Speaker 02

  So tomorrow though, I'll be like, right, bit more sensible. So that's how I look at everything. You, you can have a blow, you can enjoy yourself. But it is about balance, but uh, it's only since I did, I did that children in need challenge and that was so physically exertive that weirdly, when I stopped that challenge, so Chris, who's like an amazing guy, I rang him up and I said, look, I'm struggling here because. As horrendous as it was doing 300 and odd mile on a child's bike. Uh, it's, uh, it was kinda like, uh, I missed it weirdly. I'm, I'm, I missed that sort of doing stuff.

• 41:51Speaker 02

  Really physically exertive things. So I had to wean myself off it, you know, and now I kinda. I've not trained for about, God, probably about a month now, but, but I know I will do again. So it's like knowing it's the, but it is. Uh, I, I don't know the science behind, but you, you know, you see everywhere that exercise. Endorphins and all that. I really do believe in that because it, it, it, there's something, it doesn't feel like it at the time.

• 42:18Fearne Cotton?

  No.

• 42:19Speaker 02

  You know what I mean? But after you do get a little bit of a like, oh, I feel better now.

• 42:23Fearne Cotton?

  Yeah, you feel better. You feel energised. You feel smug. I like that bit. You feel so smug for the rest of the day. It's great.

• 42:29Speaker 02

  I've not got into the old, uh, Apple watch, counting my steps and all that carry on yet, but, uh.

• 42:35Fearne Cotton?

  Oh, that carry on.

• 42:36Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. But, uh, I, I go off how my trousers feel.

• 42:42Fearne Cotton?

  Right, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 42:44Speaker 02

  Oh, I'm all right. Oh, oh, Jesus. Better get on the Peloton. You know what I mean? So that, that's how I do it these days.

• 42:51Fearne Cotton?

  How was your sleep? Has your mental health affected that in a, in a negative way ever?

• 42:55Speaker 02

  Uh, no, I, I think having three kids in general, permanently tired. Like, per, uh, uh, you know, when they talk about, like, oh, you don't have caffeine after six o'clock. Like, I can have it at bedtime. I can literally have a cup of coffee at the side of me in bed, drink it and I'm gone.

• 43:13Fearne Cotton?

  Really?

• 43:13Speaker 02

  Yeah. Um, my biggest thing is it, it, it doesn't feel like I can ever get into a. That's one of my, when you were talking about yoga right at the beginning, that's something I wanna do, but I wanna try and work on my sleep.

• 43:27Fearne Cotton?

  Yeah.

• 43:27Speaker 02

  I wanna try and, like, I love an early night. I mean, it feels like a little bit of a win.

• 43:35Fearne Cotton?

  It's so naughty and brilliant.

• 43:37Speaker 02

  Quarter to 10 with a.

• 43:38Fearne Cotton?

  Quarter to 10, that's late. That is, I'm not even joking, that is so late.

• 43:44Speaker 02

  Yeah, but I, I, I kinda love it and I love going, oh, I'm in bed and you're not.

• 43:49Fearne Cotton?

  Yeah, I love it. Especially in the summer when you're going to bed and it's daylight.

• 43:54Speaker 02

  Oh, I love it.

• 43:55Fearne Cotton?

  Cheeky.

• 43:56Speaker 02

  Although I, I, I love in summer, I love the quilt between me knees.

• 44:00Fearne Cotton?

  Right.

• 44:01Speaker 02

  And obviously the cold side of the pillow. That is the best feeling ever in summer, but uh.

• 44:06Fearne Cotton?

  So niche.

• 44:07Speaker 02

  But yeah, I wanna try and, and it's difficult. I, I, I think, you know, again, going back to having kids, keeping a routine when you've got children is not easy because like last night we were listening with a toothache, you know, things happen. Um, but I'd love to be able to consistently like be in bed for about half ten.

• 44:27Fearne Cotton?

  Mmm.

• 44:28Speaker 02

  And get up at, you know, well, I'm always up in the morning with the kids anyhow, but, but just get that, is it eight hours is the optimal thing?

• 44:35Fearne Cotton?

  Well, it keeps changing, doesn't it? I think we're saying eight.

• 44:37Speaker 02

  Is eight the kind of one?

• 44:38Fearne Cotton?

  It kinda stresses me out knowing, because then when I haven't got eight, I'm like, oh no, it's gonna be a bad day. And usually it's not. Usually you're absolutely fine.

• 44:45Speaker 02

  Yeah, I remember once, I, I, I once slept, I think it were, uh, uh, honestly, for about 12 hours. I were ill. I went away with some friends to Portugal and had a dodgy steak.

• 44:54Fearne Cotton?

  Mmm.

• 44:55Speaker 02

  And it really did me in, I mean, both ends. Uh, and, and I just stayed in bed for about three days. But I remember sleeping for 12 hours and waking up and literally feeling like one of the Avengers.

• 45:07Fearne Cotton?

  Yes.

• 45:08Speaker 02

  I was like, ah. So there is something in the sleep thing, you know what I mean?

• 45:14Fearne Cotton?

  There's something in the sleep thing.

• 45:15Speaker 02

  You know, talks about the gym and everything else, but the sleep thing is key.

• 45:19Fearne Cotton?

  We can all, all agree on that.

• 45:20Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 45:21Fearne Cotton?

  What do you do, right? So you mentioned this earlier, getting into these sort of catastrophizing cycles. I, I do this all the time. I had really bad periods of it where I believed all the worst outcomes were gonna happen. It was like, that is how my day is gonna go. Well, that is, that worst case scenario is gonna happen if I don't do whatever. Like OCD in the mix, the whole thing. When you're on a bit of a catastrophizing vortex, how do you get out of that? How do you find common sense again or a place of feeling more neutral about it?

• 45:51Speaker 02

  I think if you can pick up the phone to a friend and, and talk about it, that helps.

• 45:58Fearne Cotton?

  Yeah.

• 45:59Speaker 02

  Um, but when I look back at all the experiences and all the bad. Parts I've had in my life and those dark sort of times. It never quite happens how you catastrophise, you know what I mean, it doesn't, that, the world doesn't end. Because that hasn't happened.

• 46:16Fearne Cotton?

  Yeah.

• 46:16Speaker 02

  So, so that's what I cling on to, you know, it, it sort of, you think, do you know what? We're above ground. And we're sort of still breathing. Let's try and figure it out, you know, and it doesn't always work, but that's the way I just kind of think. It's not gonna be as bad as. As what you think it's gonna be.

• 46:35Fearne Cotton?

  Yeah, it's so hard to claw yourself back when you're in that little spiral, it's not easy, but. We can all do it. And what about self loathing? Does that ever come into it when you're feeling down? You know, that's certainly. I think something that myself and all these lovely happy place. A lot of the ladies here, when we're talking on social media or we're getting feedback from certain podcast episodes, that is such an issue when your mental health's low. The self loathing is so easily creeps into the equation.

• 47:02Speaker 02

  Uh, I, I don't care what you do for a living, we all go through that. We all go for, you, you, and you have the imposter syndrome and everything else. I think for me. Strange, when I started doing this job. Because I'm like, say, brought up by my mum on her own, in Bolton, working class, I remember. Even now, sometimes I kind of feel as though like, God, everyone's. Better educated than me, everyone seems to have gone to uni and everyone's. Kind of feel secure. Now, I know that isn't the case. But that's what my mind tells me and that's where you start doubting yourself and worrying about stuff and I've done.

• 47:43Speaker 02

  So many tours of the UK, I've just done one recently, so that everywhere, and even though that happens. I still worry about. Being able to do stuff and what people think and everything else and it's a, but. You know, I think the good news, if you can call it good news, is we, we all, we all think that.

• 48:04Fearne Cotton?

  We do.

• 48:04Speaker 02

  We all, and if you don't, this, you're probably that person who's trying to like, ah. If you, if you don't.

• 48:12Fearne Cotton?

  Um, I, I totally hear you on that, you know, I'm from a working class background, I didn't go to university, I've been. Totally like just drowning in that insecurity that I'm not smart enough and I think the the good flip side of that is that it drives you, that drives me constantly, I wanna read more books, I wanna learn more, I wanna better myself, I wanna prove to myself that I can do things that I don't think I'm capable of, I think you can eat and I've had moments where I have blocked myself from doing things, I've thought I'm not smart enough to do that, I'm out of my depth, you know, you're with a bunch of journalists who went to Oxbridge or whatever and you just feel like this is so out of my league, but on a good day, if you can flip it and it drives you, that is the best motivator ever.

• 48:57Speaker 02

  Yeah, absolutely, and like see even all those people who've had that education, everything else, they'll have their own doubts about things, or they'll probably look at you and go, oh, I wish I could be like, I wish I had that experience in my life and everyone does it, everyone looks at everyone else and wants a little bit of what they've got, don't they?

• 49:12Fearne Cotton?

  Yeah.

• 49:12Speaker 02

  In Australia, I'm glad we're not all like that, I'm glad we have problems sometimes because if everything was a bed of roses constantly, I think you'd probably get bored after a while, you need a little bit of drama now and again, just to keep you on your toes, you know what I mean?

• 49:29Fearne Cotton?

  You learn from it.

• 49:29Speaker 02

  Of course you do.

• 49:30Fearne Cotton?

  You learn from it, make better choices, don't do it again.

• 49:32Speaker 02

  Yeah, you get better from it.

• 49:33Fearne Cotton?

  Absolutely, and where would you say your happy place is, Paddy?

• 49:37Speaker 02

  Uh, definitely at home, you know, probably, I should imagine most people say that to you, I don't know if they do or they don't, but yeah, I love being at home, like I say, it's just that, I remember when I were a kid, like my mum would shout me in on Sunday night, so you'd be playing out and then back in the day, mums used to shout you, you don't see that much, and I'd be like, Patrick! And you'd hear it like from five miles away, whatever you were doing, you're like a meerkat, then you're at your home, and that used to be, this is before forms, you know, so my mum would shout me in on Sunday night, and I always remember like, so Sunday was bath night, so you'd have your bath.

• 50:20Fearne Cotton?

  But just once a week?

• 50:21Speaker 02

  Once a week, whether you like it or not. So it used to be bath night and then you get in front of the fire, your mum would comb your hair in front of the fire.

• 50:31Fearne Cotton?

  Were you brought up in the Victorian times?

• 50:32Speaker 02

  No, honestly, this is, this is, honestly, this was a Bolton thing. So like, and it'd be like, play your cards right, I'll love Bota, something to be on the telly. But those moments of feeling really safe and, and warm and loved and comfortable, you're not realising that at the time, but they stay with you. And I think now, the psychology of that, when I'm at home and the door's shut and the kids are in bed and I've got the telly on, it must just be, it's somewhere in me, so like, that is a happy place. You know what I mean? And I just love that.

• 51:09Fearne Cotton?

  I love it. Do you still just bath on a Sunday?

• 51:12Speaker 02

  No, yeah. Do you know what, it's weird, isn't it? Because I love a bath and I'm a shower person these days, but I absolutely love a bath. But the only trouble now, again with having kids, you start running a bath, Christ, it's 20 minutes filling it up. Kids, summer kicks off, bath's cold. Uh, I've done, I've tried the Epsom salts and everything, but they just get up your bum. Uh, it's just like grit, it's like sitting on grit in the bath. I'm like, who's this relaxing? Um, but yeah, I kind of, I love being at home and I love knowing I've nothing to do.

• 51:49Fearne Cotton?

  Yeah.

• 51:50Speaker 02

  It's just, the simple things in life are always the best.

• 51:54Fearne Cotton?

  They are.

• 51:55Speaker 02

  They're always the best.

• 51:56Fearne Cotton?

  They are the best. Well, we're going to let you get home to potentially have a bath if you fancy it.

• 52:00Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah. Felicity's dad will be back on the scene.

• 52:03Fearne Cotton?

  Felicity's dad.

• 52:04Speaker 02

  In about 30 minutes. Yeah.

• 52:06Fearne Cotton?

  Well, we have loved having you at the Happy Place Festival.

• 52:08Speaker 02

  Thanks for having me.

• 52:09Fearne Cotton?

  Everyone, give it up for Paddy McGuinness.

• 52:10Speaker 02

  Thank you, thank you.

• 52:11Fearne Cotton?

  Come on, Paddy.

• 52:12Speaker 02

  Thank you.

• 52:13Fearne Cotton?

  Oh, Paddy, you absolute legend. I loved that conversation. I really hope you did too. I especially love the idea of Paddy drying himself off by a fire like he's born in the olden times. Um, oh, Paddy, that was so good. Really appreciate your time. Now, look, next week, by the way, I'll be joined by another very, very funny person, a very funny Welsh person. I'll leave you with that. Okay, until then, a massive thanks again to Paddy, to the producers of this episode, Nushka Tate and Basil Oxtoby, and to you, you gorgeous lads.

• 53:18Speaker 03

  Hi, everyone. It's Katie Couric. And on my podcast, Next Question, we love stories about how women are taking control of their lives. They are increasingly leading financial decisions in their households. Yet, many say they don't feel fully prepared for the long-term financial choices ahead. Real confidence comes from knowing your financial future is protected, whatever happens. Pacific Life has helped generations protect what matters today and prepare for tomorrow with life insurance and lifetime income solutions. It's a promise Pacific Life has kept for nearly 160 years, so its customers can keep theirs. Ask a financial

• 54:01Speaker 03

  professional about how Pacific Life can help you create a more confident financial future. Pacific Life Insurance Company, Omaha, Nebraska, and in New York, Pacific Life and Annuity, Phoenix, Arizona.

• 54:17Speaker 09

  At Lowe's this Veterans Day and every day, military members, veterans and their spouses get automatic MyLowe's Rewards Silver Status Benefits. Plus, 10% off eligible purchases with no annual limit. It's one way we honor and give back to those who have served and still do. Learn more and verify now at Lowe's.com/military. 10% discount can't be combined with another offer. Exclusions, terms and conditions apply. Loyalty programs subject to terms and conditions. Details at Lowe's.com/terms. Subject to change.

• 54:46Speaker 10

  Some travelers want the charm of an independent hotel. Others want the confidence of a trusted global brand. With Series by Marriott, you get both. Each property is uniquely connected to its destination, delivering local experiences and memorable stays, while being backed by the quality, reliability and Marriott Bonvoy benefits travelers know and trust. Experience the destination without the compromise. Series by Marriott is part of Marriott Bonvoy. Book direct at Marriott.com or on the Marriott Bonvoy app.

• 55:17Speaker 11

  I'm Jake Stauk, co-founder and CEO of Serval. We built Serval to automate the IT work that slows companies down. Onboarding, password resets, access to applications, my laptop stopped working. While employees wait for help, their real work is put on hold. IT desperately wants to automate this work, and that's why they need Serval. You just tell Serval what you want to automate in plain English, and it's built. No drag and drop workflows, no expensive consultants. Employees get unblocked and IT teams go from drowning in tickets to building what actually matters. With Serval, IT becomes the AI engine powering the entire company. This is a new way to run IT.

• 55:58Speaker 11

  We guarantee you'll automate 50% of all tickets and we'll prove it to you in a free four-week pilot.

• 56:05Speaker 11

  Go to serval.com/tickets. That's S-E-R-V-A-L dot com slash tickets.