No Mami, Yes Papi, Fancy B Day

Get MORE Bad Friends at our Patreon!! https://www.patreon.com/badfriends Thank you to our Sponsors: Rocket Money, Shopify, BLUECHEW, Draft Kings • Rocket Money: Cancel your unwanted subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster with Rocket Money. Go to http://www. RocketMoney.com/BADFRIENDS today. • Shopify: Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at https://www.shopify.com/badfriends • Draft Kings: https://sportsbook.draftkings.com Bet the unexpected with DraftKings Sportsbook! Download the DraftKings Sportsbook app and use code BADFRIENDS*. YouTube Subscribe: http://bit.ly/BadFriendsYouTube Merch: http://badfriendsmerch.com 0:00 Feliz Compleaños 5:00 Bobby Piñata 10:00 Bailing On St. Patrick's Day Show 19:00 Shine Gillis & Animated Movie 24:00 Sober Bobby Saves Lives 30:00 Fancy's B-Day Present 36:00 Meeting Bon Joon Ho 40:00 Terrible at Online Dating 48:00 Bobby Lee's Comedy Special 53:00 Chevy Chase at Dr. Phil Live 58:00 The Doomsday Clock 1:02:00 Buying Our Signatures More Bobby Lee TigerBelly: https://www.youtube.com/tigerbelly Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bobbyleelive Twitter: https://twitter.com/bobbyleelive Tickets: https://bobbylee.live More Andrew Santino Whiskey Ginger: https://www.youtube.com/andrewsantinowhiskeyginger Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/cheetosantino Twitter: https://Twitter.com/cheetosantino Tickets: http://www.andrewsantino.com More Juicy Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jetskijohnson/?hl=en More Fancy SOS VHS: https://www.youtube.com/@SosvHs Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/fancyb.1 More Bad Friends iTunes: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/bad-friends/id1496265971 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/badfriendspod/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/badfriends_pod Official Website: http://badfriendspod.com/ *Gambling problem? Call 1-800-Gambler. In New York, call 877-8HOPENY or text HOPENY (467369). In Connecticut, Help is available for problem gambling. Call tel:8887897777 or visit ccpg dot org. Please play responsibly. On behalf of Boot Hill Casino & Resort (Kansas). Twenty-one plus age and eligibility varies by jurisdiction. Void in New Hampshire, Oregon, Ontario. Bonus bets expire one hundred sixty eight hours after issuance. For additional terms and responsible gaming resources, see http://DKNG.co/BBALL. Opening Credits and Branding: https://www.instagram.com/joseph_faria & https://www.instagram.com/jenna_sunday Credit Sequence Music: http://bit.ly/RocomMusic // https://www.instagram.com/rocom Character Design: https://www.instagram.com/jeffreymyles Bad Friends Mosaic Sign: https://www.instagram.com/tedmunzmosaicart Produced by: 7EQUIS https://www.7equis.com/ Podcast Producer: Andrés Rosende This episode contains paid promotion. #bobbylee #andrewsantino #badfriends #sponsored #ads Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Speaker 00

  For decades, a shadowy organisation called The Lemonati has kept lemon on top and lime in the shadows. Look around, lemon-forward sodas, even lemon-forward songs. We ran the tracks, slowed them down, reversed them, and squeezed out the truth.

• 0:19Speaker 00

  That's lemon propaganda right there. But now, 7-Up is fighting back with their new lime lemon soda. Join the 7 uprising. Flip the sip.

• 0:30Andrew Santino?

  Hello, mate. Hello there, mate. We're going over to the pond there, go get beans on toast, and then going to Ireland. Beautiful, beautiful Ireland. So where are we going first? We're gonna go to London, England. July 18th, guys. Okay, July 18th. OVO Arena, Wembley. We'll be in London, England, on July 18th. Dublin, Ireland. Then we're going to Dublin, Ireland. July 19th, we're at the Three Arena. The Three Arena! Three Arena! Well, that's a good impression. Thank you. Give me a good Irish impression. Yeah, well... Oh, that's so good. That's so good. Thank you! Say "Pint of Guinness". Pint of Guinness. That's perfect. Dublin, Ireland. We're coming to see you July 19th at the Three Arena.

• 1:16Andrew Santino?

  Tickets available at badfriendspod.com. London, England. Tickets available, July 18th, at badfriendspod.com.

• 1:24Speaker 02

  You two are bad friends. Who are these two idiots? White dude, man, Asian dude. You two are disgusting. Oh, you two are something. We're bad friends.

• 1:37Andrew Santino?

  Feliz coplianos aquí. Feliz coplianos aquí. Lucky! Feliz coplianos aquí. Feliz coplianos. Andreas.

• 1:51Bobby Lee?

  Is it your birthday?

• 1:52Andrew Santino?

  Happy birthday!

• 1:54Bobby Lee?

  I just got that. I'm like, who could... Because it's... Ow, happy! How old are you now? I mean, how long do porgs live?

• 2:03Andrew Santino?

  They live a long life.

• 2:04Bobby Lee?

  They do? Yeah. Not when they're being eaten by Chewbacca.

• 2:09Andrew Santino?

  I'm trying to say...

• 2:10Bobby Lee?

  Do you remember that scene where he grilled a porg?

• 2:12Andrew Santino?

  Yes. What silly game is this?

• 2:15Bobby Lee?

  Oh, it's the Mexican Venus flytrap.

• 2:17Andrew Santino?

  I gotta catch it like this?

• 2:18Speaker 04

  Yeah, it's a Mexican game.

• 2:20Andrew Santino?

  Ow!

• 2:21Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 2:21Andrew Santino?

  Mexican games hurt.

• 2:23Bobby Lee?

  Well, I could do it first try, I think.

• 2:25Andrew Santino?

  You think so?

• 2:26Bobby Lee?

  No. Ow dude, you actually even hurt your hand.

• 2:31Bobby Lee?

  Alright. Let's start from the top. I don't like where it started. Let's sing the song again. Put the lyrics up.

• 2:49Bobby Lee?

  It's not hurt. It's the same words over and over. How did you mess that up? Because they said name. In Spain, it's coplianos felis.

• 3:01Bobby Lee?

  Let me, can I have it solo? I want a cappella. I think that's my problem. I'll go fa- no, I want the first chunk again, no? No, it's in Spain. We're doing- he's Spanish. Oh, okay, so. Cumprianos felis. Cumprianos felis. Te diciemos, Andreas. Cumprianos felis.

• 3:25Speaker 05

  After five years, I'm gonna go.

• 3:27Bobby Lee?

  And then watch.

• 3:27Speaker 05

  It's Andres.

• 3:28Bobby Lee?

  Well, I have another sound effect. You know what that is? Lawn mower. No, leaf mower.

• 3:36Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. Anyway, happy- how old are you now?

• 3:40Speaker 05

  Forty-five.

• 3:41Bobby Lee?

  Forty-five. God, imagine being forty-five as a director and not directing anything. I mean, is there a li- I mean, what I've never seen. Wow.

• 3:51Speaker 05

  There is definitely an exception.

• 3:53Bobby Lee?

  Be nice to the guy. It's his birthday today. Happy birthday, I mean. You know what? Can I say something? You do the best YouTube videos.

• 4:00Bobby Lee?

  Really? When I see his YouTube, I go, oh my god, this should be a criterion. Top notch. Yeah, top notch.

• 4:06Speaker 05

  Without YouTube, you're not even famous in the last ten years, Bobby.

• 4:09Bobby Lee?

  Whoa. Shots fired. Shots fired. Can I say something? I came in smiling and a good laugh, something like that. Where did that come from?

• 4:20Speaker 05

  You attacked Andres on his birthday.

• 4:22Bobby Lee?

  You did. On his birthday. Okay, alright, fine, alright? But can I ask you guys? Can I- Andrew, can I ask you a question? Please. Name me one movie.

• 4:33Bobby Lee?

  Just let's be factual here.

• 4:34Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 4:35Bobby Lee?

  Name me one movie that Andreas has directed.

• 4:39Andrew Santino?

  Go to IMDb. There's actually a lot on there.

• 4:41Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I'm pretty sure. Let me look.

• 4:43Speaker 06

  Andres Rosende, I am the bee. I am the bee.

• 4:47Bobby Lee?

  Although you have one.

• 4:48Andrew Santino?

  I am the best. Wait, wait, zoom in. Wait, I want to read his. I want to read his line.

• 4:53Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I want to read it, read it.

• 4:54Andrew Santino?

  Zoom in.

• 4:56Speaker 06

  Andres is an LA-based writer-director from España. He received a BA in Film Studies from Universitat Complutense of Madrid and an MFA from Columbia University. His films have played at festivals all around the globe, including Cannes, Stigets, Cleveland, South by South...

• 5:12Andrew Santino?

  Cleveland?

• 5:13Bobby Lee?

  I want a line, I want a line.

• 5:14Andrew Santino?

  Go.

• 5:15Bobby Lee?

  No, you finish it, then let's...

• 5:16Speaker 06

  Cleveland, South by Southwest, Panthasia, The Prior's Club, and El Akma Young Directors Night.

• 5:22Bobby Lee?

  Andreas has received many awards, including DJ for Best Latin, Short for Escape,

• 5:31Bobby Lee?

  The More Than 35, Mr. Bear, and The Fantastic Fest, Mercado, Fantístico Gold Award for the Best Future in Development for the Turned.

• 5:42Andrew Santino?

  Wow.

• 5:42Bobby Lee?

  What has he directed? Here we go.

• 5:44Andrew Santino?

  Known For.

• 5:44Bobby Lee?

  Known For. Let's go Known For.

• 5:46Andrew Santino?

  Bad Friends. First thing up there. Go look at Producer. Bad Friends.

• 5:49Bobby Lee?

  Bad Friends.

• 5:50Andrew Santino?

  American Carnage. Oh, yeah, that's right. You produced that.

• 5:52Bobby Lee?

  You produced that. Oh, good.

• 5:54Andrew Santino?

  Jane Anonymous, The Devil Below, Bad Friends, Chain of Death.

• 5:57Bobby Lee?

  Chain of Death. Oh, Puppet Cop was great. Puppet Cop!

• 6:01Andrew Santino?

  Puppet Cop was so underrated. I know, I know.

• 6:05Bobby Lee?

  I know, I know. Exactly. What am I being pulled over, sir?

• 6:10Speaker 02

  Well, you're black.

• 6:12Bobby Lee?

  All right.

• 6:13Andrew Santino?

  Puppet Cop.

• 6:14Bobby Lee?

  Puppet Cop, great, underrated. Green Plastic Sandals. I'm... The red... You thought that red plastic sandals was good? Green?

• 6:23Andrew Santino?

  Wait till you see green.

• 6:24Bobby Lee?

  Oh, wait till you see green plastic sandals, right?

• 6:26Andrew Santino?

  It's gonna blow your mind.

• 6:27Bobby Lee?

  Uh, Mr. Bear.

• 6:28Andrew Santino?

  Which is actually the original of the show The Bear on FX.

• 6:32Bobby Lee?

  Right.

• 6:33Andrew Santino?

  This is just the Spanish version. Mister Bear?

• 6:35Bobby Lee?

  I thought it was a prequel for To Cocaine Bear.

• 6:38Andrew Santino?

  Oh, yeah, Mister Bear. He had a job before he did coke. Before Cocaine Bear did coke, he had a job, he had a family. Escape.

• 6:45Bobby Lee?

  And the Oscar nominated Escape.

• 6:48Andrew Santino?

  Escape. Don't forget about snapshots.

• 6:50Bobby Lee?

  Oh, how can you forget about snapshots?

• 6:55Bobby Lee?

  That's how he did it.

• 6:56Speaker 05

  Thank you, guys.

• 6:56Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, so very good.

• 6:57Andrew Santino?

  Andres, do you want to say anything to defend yourself on your birthday? Happiest of the birthdays?

• 7:02Speaker 05

  Thank you, guys.

• 7:02Andrew Santino?

  Were we able to get you any gifts?

• 7:05Speaker 05

  Your presence is a gift.

• 7:07Andrew Santino?

  Give me. McCone's got some gifts that we'd like to give you for your birthday.

• 7:10Speaker 05

  Okay.

• 7:11Andrew Santino?

  You mean the world to us.

• 7:12Speaker 05

  Uh huh.

• 7:13Andrew Santino?

  Your work here is undeniable, irrefutable, and irreplaceable. You are that good to us. You mean the world, and I mean it. Bobby and I wouldn't be where we are without you.

• 7:23Bobby Lee?

  I have some words to say, too. Your work is...

• 7:26Andrew Santino?

  And your first gift is there.

• 7:28Bobby Lee?

  A pinata.

• 7:29Andrew Santino?

  And look at your second gift: a pinata.

• 7:31Bobby Lee?

  Shape like...

• 7:32Andrew Santino?

  Shape like what?

• 7:34Bobby Lee?

  Let me look at the face. Can I see the face? Shape like...

• 7:41Andrew Santino?

  It's you.

• 7:42Speaker 05

  This is the greatest gift I ever got.

• 7:44Andrew Santino?

  All right. Actually, pretty great. I'm quite excited about this.

• 7:47Speaker 05

  So funny.

• 7:49Andrew Santino?

  Thank you. Yes.

• 8:05Andrew Santino?

  Hit the close your eyes! Hit the close your eyes, bitch!

• 8:10Bobby Lee?

  All right, stop for a second. Stop for a second. Stop for a second. Can I use the stick? I want to do an impression. Can I do an impression?

• 8:17Andrew Santino?

  The best part is, he hasn't even dented it. It hasn't even broke a little bit.

• 8:21Bobby Lee?

  This is like, guess what impression I'm doing, okay?

• 8:26Bobby Lee?

  It was a mistake. A Leila Everett. The baton.

• 8:29Andrew Santino?

  Oh, very good. Very good. All right, let him finish.

• 8:35Bobby Lee?

  Oh, wait, wait. I want to talk about it.

• 8:37Andrew Santino?

  Let him finish. Go ahead, Fancy.

• 8:38Bobby Lee?

  I'm doing a...

• 8:39Andrew Santino?

  Play the music and let him finish.

• 8:40Bobby Lee?

  I'm doing a GoFundMe for fucking A Leila Everett.

• 8:44Andrew Santino?

  Close your eyes!

• 8:51Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, yes!

• 8:55Andrew Santino?

  More!

• 9:02Andrew Santino?

  Oh, there, there, yay! Very good, Carlos.

• 9:07Andrew Santino?

  That's the kind of production that we have on this show. The candy couldn't even go inside of it.

• 9:12Bobby Lee?

  But I am doing a GoFundMe on Aleila Everett.

• 9:15Andrew Santino?

  You broke the vent, it was so strong.

• 9:17Bobby Lee?

  I have something serious to say.

• 9:18Andrew Santino?

  Jesus Christ, the vent is broken.

• 9:23Andrew Santino?

  Wow. Okay, Bob, put the guest up there. Put Broken Bobby up there, please.

• 9:30Andrew Santino?

  Very good. There's Broken Bobby.

• 9:34Andrew Santino?

  By the way, they got the eyes right.

• 9:40Andrew Santino?

  Fancy, tell me, how did that feel? Did that feel good? It felt so good. That felt like you- Best birthday in the last 10 years. Cathartic, right? Yes. You got something off your chest? Yes.

• 9:49Bobby Lee?

  Dude, I've never had Mexican gum before, you can't even chew through it.

• 9:54Bobby Lee?

  It's like a fucking, what?

• 9:56Speaker 06

  It's made out of the bottom of a chew.

• 9:58Andrew Santino?

  You wanna chew my chew?

• 9:59Bobby Lee?

  It's like a Jolly Roger, I can't chew it.

• 10:01Andrew Santino?

  Well, here, how about this? Let's settle some beef the other way. I'm gonna call somebody.

• 10:06Bobby Lee?

  I want my piñata. I want my Andreas piñata.

• 10:10Andrew Santino?

  You'll get yours.

• 10:10Bobby Lee?

  Do you have an Andreas piñata, dude?

• 10:12Andrew Santino?

  Not at all.

• 10:12Bobby Lee?

  I'll show you what I do.

• 10:17Andrew Santino?

  Well, let me see if I can get ahold of somebody here.

• 10:22Andrew Santino?

  Hello?

• 10:25Andrew Santino?

  Fitz?

• 10:26Speaker 07

  What's up, buddy?

• 10:27Andrew Santino?

  Hey, Greg Fitzsimmons, here on the Bad Friends Podcast. Greg, I'm sitting next to Bobby Lee. Bobby is, uh... Bobby wants to talk to you about something. Do you have anything you want to explain? You talked, you called me today, and I told him you were awful hurt about something. I didn't get the full story. What really happened?

• 10:43Speaker 07

  No, not hurt at all. I was, uh, touched, honored that Bobby would agree to come on. And, you know, I do my St. Patrick's Day show every year.

• 10:52Andrew Santino?

  Famous show, every year. Greg Fitzsimmons does an incredible, uh, St. Patty's Day show. They have Irish soda bread, they have traditional songs-

• 10:59Speaker 07

  Live music.

• 11:00Andrew Santino?

  Live music.

• 11:01Speaker 07

  It's a party. It's beyond a comedy show. It's a party.

• 11:04Andrew Santino?

  It really is.

• 11:04Speaker 07

  And, uh, I was so happy to promote it. I went on K- I went on KTLA, I went on Good Day LA.

• 11:12Bobby Lee?

  Ooh, K-Rock.

• 11:13Speaker 07

  Bobby was nice enough to lend lend his name to the to the show and we got a good crowd and unfortunately, um, I don't know what happened.

• 11:24Bobby Lee?

  I'll tell you what happened.

• 11:25Speaker 07

  Missing at the end of the show.

• 11:26Bobby Lee?

  Can I tell you what happened?

• 11:27Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, let's hear it.

• 11:28Bobby Lee?

  First of all, I apologize.

• 11:32Bobby Lee?

  Did you hear that?

• 11:33Speaker 07

  Of course.

• 11:34Bobby Lee?

  Okay, so, um, secondly, did you get my money?

• 11:38Speaker 07

  Somebody gave me $200.

• 11:39Bobby Lee?

  Exactly, I gave you, for what? For the charity, right?

• 11:42Speaker 07

  I gave it to the busboy.

• 11:43Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, and can I say something? What does that buy? A couple of books. A couple of books, a couple of like, you know, where you fill out the grades? I don't know how school works, but like, a couple of things, pencils.

• 11:56Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 11:56Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, and also, um,

• 11:57Speaker 07

  What are you talking about?

• 11:59Andrew Santino?

  Where do you think the money was going?

• 12:00Bobby Lee?

  What's the benefit for?

• 12:03Speaker 07

  It was it was a benefit for the comedians. I was paying you a bunch of money.

• 12:08Andrew Santino?

  You were getting money to perform it? There was no benefit?

• 12:10Bobby Lee?

  It was a benefit for a school?

• 12:13Speaker 07

  There was no benefit for a

• 12:14Bobby Lee?

  The way did I walk in and see little kids on stage playing the guitar?

• 12:20Speaker 07

  Little kids?

• 12:21Bobby Lee?

  Well, who was on stage playing? It was like Mary Paul and Mary, what is it called?

• 12:25Speaker 07

  Mary Paul and Mary?

• 12:28Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, there's two Marys in that band. Well, was there not singing there?

• 12:33Speaker 07

  Did that throw, did that throw your comedy off that much? You couldn't perform because there was a musical act on?

• 12:39Bobby Lee?

  But it's just not that. I looked at the back row, there was a lot, a bunch of older ladies there and there's like musical things going on. I turned to Tim Dillon and I go, you know, I'm just gonna give $200 for the charity. And I'm gonna bail.

• 12:51Andrew Santino?

  So wait a minute, you showed up to the venue, didn't even perform? You bailed because of the crowd and because of the

• 12:56Speaker 07

  No, we, he's supposed to headline the show and he just just decided not to.

• 13:02Andrew Santino?

  Wow, but you came all the way there.

• 13:04Bobby Lee?

  But did I not go? That's good.

• 13:08Bobby Lee?

  Like going is good, going is good.

• 13:11Speaker 07

  So what is it? Have you not worked out that 15 minutes of material?

• 13:15Bobby Lee?

  Oh, here we go. This is how we're gonna do it? Oh, we're gonna do this?

• 13:19Speaker 07

  I'm wondering how many more times you need to do that 15 minutes before you know it's gonna work him out of where you go.

• 13:27Bobby Lee?

  I'm gonna, you know, I'm gonna let you have this. Give me another one.

• 13:33Speaker 07

  Another what?

• 13:33Bobby Lee?

  A slam, another slam.

• 13:35Speaker 07

  No, Bobby, look, you are doing so well with what you've been dealt genetically, mentally, emotionally. I know that you're molested by an intellectually disabled person. I know that you've got a mustache that just won't fucking stand up and grow. There's a lot of things you're struggling with. So when you bail out on a show like that, you let down hundreds of people in the audience.

• 14:01Bobby Lee?

  I don't think so. I don't, I don't think so. Okay.

• 14:04Andrew Santino?

  Now, Fitz, just for clarity, was his name promoted on the show as he was going?

• 14:08Speaker 07

  Very much so. Very much so. Yeah.

• 14:12Andrew Santino?

  Anything, anything for the people that are listening that could have gone to that show?

• 14:15Bobby Lee?

  Number one, I'm sorry. I bought some books for a cherry that doesn't exist.

• 14:20Andrew Santino?

  There is some cherry.

• 14:21Bobby Lee?

  Okay. But you did grab the $200, put it in your pocket. That's good.

• 14:26Speaker 07

  I gave it to the busboy.

• 14:28Andrew Santino?

  He gave it to the busboy?

• 14:28Bobby Lee?

  Good.

• 14:29Speaker 07

  Yes.

• 14:29Bobby Lee?

  And that busboy, what's he gonna get? Corn?

• 14:33Andrew Santino?

  They love corn.

• 14:33Bobby Lee?

  They love the corn, right? They like, you know, making it.

• 14:35Speaker 07

  Wait, wait a minute. What is this? Who says he was Mexican? How do you both jump to that immediately?

• 14:41Andrew Santino?

  Was he?

• 14:41Speaker 07

  He was an, he was an American young man.

• 14:45Bobby Lee?

  How would Trump, how would Trump, Trump define it if you saw him? Would be in a plane to go to?

• 14:51Speaker 07

  Call him Mexican.

• 14:54Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, okay. So he got, you know?

• 14:57Speaker 07

  He'd be in a cell in El Paso. No, look, Tim Dillon was there, thank God. He was not supposed to be there, and he just stopped by as a friend to support the show. And luckily, he went on, so he was able to close it out, but.

• 15:11Bobby Lee?

  You know, it's so funny to do this because I, I saw his name on the list.

• 15:17Speaker 07

  His name is not on the list.

• 15:18Bobby Lee?

  Oh, yeah. You're right.

• 15:22Bobby Lee?

  I think you're right. Well, thank Tim Dillon. And I'm sorry.

• 15:27Andrew Santino?

  I mean Fitz is one of our oldest friends.

• 15:28Bobby Lee?

  I know, but he's

• 15:29Andrew Santino?

  One of our most loyal.

• 15:30Bobby Lee?

  I had a gig at the Ice House. Were you not running behind?

• 15:35Speaker 07

  We were not running behind. No, we were not.

• 15:38Speaker 07

  We were absolutely because there was a show on after us and so we had to promise them we would be done. An hour and a half into the, after the show started, which we were.

• 15:47Bobby Lee?

  I just made a bunch of assumptions and I'm so sorry. I thought it was a charity for kids.

• 15:51Speaker 07

  You know, I love you.

• 15:52Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 15:53Speaker 07

  Dude, I love you. I respect you and I appreciate you agreeing to do it even though you didn't, but you agreed to. And that's the thing that means the most.

• 16:04Andrew Santino?

  Okay. The commitment, not the follow through.

• 16:07Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 16:07Andrew Santino?

  But the verbal commitment does mean a lot.

• 16:09Bobby Lee?

  I just got a bad vibe from the room.

• 16:11Andrew Santino?

  You got a bad vibe from a full packed house, a sold out room?

• 16:14Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, but there were people on stage singing folk music.

• 16:16Speaker 07

  Danny Letterman, they all said that this was the best crowd they've seen in a year. Everybody destroyed.

• 16:23Andrew Santino?

  Everybody kidding.

• 16:24Bobby Lee?

  But can I?

• 16:25Speaker 07

  Because it was a party. It was a fucking party. It wasn't just the show. It was beyond that.

• 16:29Bobby Lee?

  Okay, I'm gonna throw somebody on the bus.

• 16:31Andrew Santino?

  Go ahead.

• 16:32Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 16:32Speaker 07

  Oh.

• 16:33Bobby Lee?

  And here we go Greg, okay?

• 16:35Speaker 07

  Yeah.

• 16:36Bobby Lee?

  I'm not mentioning Andy or Tim, right? But somebody that was on the show said this. The reason why they laughed so hard is because the music was weird.

• 16:46Andrew Santino?

  Who said it?

• 16:48Bobby Lee?

  I can't tell you.

• 16:48Andrew Santino?

  You literally just said, "I'm gonna throw someone under the bus."

• 16:50Bobby Lee?

  I know.

• 16:51Andrew Santino?

  So then do it.

• 16:51Bobby Lee?

  I can't.

• 16:52Andrew Santino?

  Give me the initials of the comic that said that.

• 16:55Bobby Lee?

  Um, T W.

• 16:58Andrew Santino?

  Who was it Greg?

• 17:00Speaker 07

  T W?

• 17:02Andrew Santino?

  Tom Wilson?

• 17:03Bobby Lee?

  No, Taylor Williamson.

• 17:04Andrew Santino?

  Taylor Williamson.

• 17:05Bobby Lee?

  He wasn't on it.

• 17:06Andrew Santino?

  Who was?

• 17:08Andrew Santino?

  Who was on the show?

• 17:09Bobby Lee?

  Oh, it's good to see Greg. Greg, Greg.

• 17:11Speaker 07

  Eric Griffin. Eric Griffin was on the show.

• 17:13Andrew Santino?

  He said it.

• 17:14Speaker 07

  Destroyed. He texted me the next day saying, "Put me, put me on that show every year." And I said, "Well, there's probably space next year." Cause Bobby has already committed. So that's an opener right there.

• 17:27Andrew Santino?

  Eric Griffin, Black Irish. Who else was on it?

• 17:30Bobby Lee?

  Tim and Annie.

• 17:32Speaker 07

  Saul, Saul Traheyo.

• 17:33Bobby Lee?

  He's great.

• 17:35Andrew Santino?

  Okay.

• 17:37Bobby Lee?

  He's great.

• 17:37Speaker 07

  He's a guy to watch.

• 17:38Bobby Lee?

  He's a star. He really is a star.

• 17:40Andrew Santino?

  Saul, yeah, Saul Traheyo is great. Alright, well then, say sorry one more time to our good friend Greg Fitzsimmons.

• 17:45Bobby Lee?

  I'm so sorry Greg, I love you.

• 17:46Andrew Santino?

  Mean it.

• 17:47Speaker 07

  You, you can always be on one of my shows. You can always be on the poster for one of my shows.

• 17:53Bobby Lee?

  I'll say it in Korean. I'll say it in Korean.

• 17:55Andrew Santino?

  Okay.

• 17:56Bobby Lee?

  I'll say it in Korean. Chingu, na, yeah. You know what chingu means?

• 18:01Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 18:01Bobby Lee?

  What does it mean?

• 18:02Andrew Santino?

  We all know what chingu means.

• 18:04Bobby Lee?

  What does chingu mean?

• 18:04Andrew Santino?

  You've said it enough on this show.

• 18:05Bobby Lee?

  What does it mean?

• 18:06Speaker 07

  It's a, it's a coin you use in a Korean spa.

• 18:12Bobby Lee?

  Chingu, chingu, na, apologizer.

• 18:16Andrew Santino?

  Oh, very good. My friend I-

• 18:19Bobby Lee?

  I don't know apology.

• 18:20Andrew Santino?

  Alright, well, we love you Greg. I'll try to fix him, man.

• 18:23Speaker 07

  Okay, I love you guys. Work, he's a work in progress. Keep working on him, Andrew.

• 18:27Andrew Santino?

  I will. Bye buddy.

• 18:29Speaker 07

  Alright, bye.

• 18:30Bobby Lee?

  Why, why?

• 18:31Andrew Santino?

  One of the greatest comics alive.

• 18:32Bobby Lee?

  I know.

• 18:32Andrew Santino?

  One of the greatest, most talented, because you disrespect a legend, that's trouble. That guy's a fucking legend. Greg Fitzsimmons is a legend. Now, you disrespect somebody else, that's on your terms. You disrespect one of our oldest friends.

• 18:44Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 18:45Andrew Santino?

  Tough, tough move. He called me. He said I was really bummed. I was having a cup of coffee. He goes, I gotta be honest with you, I was pretty bummed at your boy. I said, what happened? And he told me the truth.

• 18:54Bobby Lee?

  Well, let me tell you something, and I can't even believe you're doing this, because I'm gonna say this.

• 18:57Andrew Santino?

  Go ahead.

• 18:58Bobby Lee?

  When I was molested by the guy without, he was in a folk band.

• 19:02Andrew Santino?

  Are you being serious?

• 19:03Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 19:03Andrew Santino?

  What did he play, other than your ball?

• 19:05Bobby Lee?

  And I saw him perform.

• 19:07Andrew Santino?

  On you?

• 19:08Bobby Lee?

  No, afterwards, after the show. So when I walked in the-

• 19:11Andrew Santino?

  That's why you got with him? You saw him, you were like, this rock star. I gotta, I gotta hook him.

• 19:15Bobby Lee?

  He was very good.

• 19:17Bobby Lee?

  He was very good.

• 19:18Andrew Santino?

  So folk music has a tie?

• 19:20Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, and I had a, I had a PTSD reaction to the show, and I had to leave.

• 19:25Andrew Santino?

  Okay.

• 19:26Bobby Lee?

  And I gave him $200.

• 19:27Andrew Santino?

  You had an MSG reaction? What did you say?

• 19:33Bobby Lee?

  I can't believe you did that.

• 19:34Andrew Santino?

  No, I didn't do it. Fitz called me today. He was actually bummed.

• 19:36Bobby Lee?

  You think it's forever dead?

• 19:38Andrew Santino?

  With Fitz?

• 19:38Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 19:39Andrew Santino?

  You're fine. The Shane thing, you're cooked.

• 19:42Bobby Lee?

  I know, I've heard that.

• 19:43Andrew Santino?

  I mean that with every sense of my be-

• 19:44Bobby Lee?

  I've heard that through the whispers of the-

• 19:46Andrew Santino?

  You're in deep shit.

• 19:46Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 19:47Andrew Santino?

  And I mean, deep shit.

• 19:49Bobby Lee?

  A war.

• 19:50Andrew Santino?

  Oh dude.

• 19:51Bobby Lee?

  It's beyond a war.

• 19:51Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, dude.

• 19:52Bobby Lee?

  And I'll lose.

• 19:53Andrew Santino?

  What did I say to you? On the show, I said, "Don't do this. Don't go after Shane. This is a bad idea."

• 19:57Bobby Lee?

  I know, but his-

• 19:58Andrew Santino?

  I said it like five times.

• 20:00Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 20:01Andrew Santino?

  Well, I'll say this. I love you. You're my partner. You're my best friend. You're my dog.

• 20:05Bobby Lee?

  Mm-hmm.

• 20:06Andrew Santino?

  Not gonna walk into that with you, bud.

• 20:08Bobby Lee?

  So when we were doing the animation today, we did a little work.

• 20:12Andrew Santino?

  We did an-

• 20:12Bobby Lee?

  You gave me a lot of notes. I liked it.

• 20:14Andrew Santino?

  We gave, okay. Go ahead and say it. Say the truth.

• 20:16Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 20:17Andrew Santino?

  Did it bother you?

• 20:18Bobby Lee?

  It didn't bother me.

• 20:18Andrew Santino?

  We did our first session today in the animated movie that we're gonna be in.

• 20:21Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, and he, um, gave me some notes.

• 20:25Speaker 00

  Andrew did?

• 20:25Bobby Lee?

  Some line readings, yeah.

• 20:26Andrew Santino?

  A lot.

• 20:27Speaker 00

  That's good.

• 20:28Bobby Lee?

  A lot. Every other line.

• 20:29Andrew Santino?

  Every other line.

• 20:31Andrew Santino?

  Why do you guys think that is?

• 20:32Speaker 00

  Andrew's a good actor.

• 20:33Andrew Santino?

  Uh-oh.

• 20:34Bobby Lee?

  Uh-oh, SpaghettiO, um-

• 20:36Andrew Santino?

  I gave him readings because I wanted to get him in the mood. And by the way, he will agree, when I said stuff to him, not line readings, when I said stuff like, "Bob, get jumpy like you do," and you did, and then do you kill it?

• 20:48Bobby Lee?

  This is what he made me do. He goes, "You're a bat, right?" And I go, "Yeah."

• 20:52Andrew Santino?

  I'm an ox and he's a bat.

• 20:54Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, but then you're like, "Be a bat."

• 20:55Andrew Santino?

  Be a bat.

• 20:56Bobby Lee?

  So I'm literally, in, in, I'm going, I'm going like this, and he goes, "More, more like a bat." I was doing this, and saying the lines, and he kept going, "That's it, that's it."

• 21:05Andrew Santino?

  Was it it?

• 21:05Bobby Lee?

  I don't know if it is. I think you just make me look like a fool.

• 21:08Andrew Santino?

  In the window. You guys know the truth. I brought something out of him, just like we do on the show. When he batted, the lines crushed, and then everyone in the booth went like this. Laughing, laughing the fucking asses off.

• 21:19Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 21:19Andrew Santino?

  It worked. When you physically emote, when you're sitting there just doing it to the mic, it's never gonna work. You were emoting like you would in the scene.

• 21:27Bobby Lee?

  Hmm.

• 21:27Andrew Santino?

  Just like you would if you were acting.

• 21:28Bobby Lee?

  Hmm.

• 21:29Andrew Santino?

  I didn't give you a line reading. I gave you emotional readings. I said, "Bob, do the thing that you do." And then he killed.

• 21:34Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 21:35Andrew Santino?

  And then he fucking killed the session, and then he got us out early because he begged the woman.

• 21:39Bobby Lee?

  Well, let me tell you-

• 21:40Andrew Santino?

  I have a video I'll send you.

• 21:41Bobby Lee?

  I also have a magical thing that happened to me, that is not really a comedy thing. It's a real thing, if I may share it.

• 21:48Andrew Santino?

  The molestation with the Down syndrome kid?

• 21:50Bobby Lee?

  No, no.

• 21:50Andrew Santino?

  No?

• 21:51Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. That was funny. That was very funny. Rocket Money, I bleed money because I have so many subscriptions out there on my phone, right? And I don't even know what's what, right? But you know what Rocket Money does? It consolidates it all. And now I get to see what I'm bleeding and I can weed it out and I can save money for myself because I live in the American U.S.A.

• 22:11Andrew Santino?

  You do.

• 22:12Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 22:12Andrew Santino?

  And Rocket Money is a personal finance app that helps find and cancel your unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending and helps lower your bills so you can grow your savings. Stop wasting money. We all do this. Bob and I download apps, you buy games, you subscribe to stuff, you have no idea what you're paying for and Rocket Money is going to help you. They're going to even try to negotiate your bills for you. They automatically scan your bills, find opportunities to save and you can ask them to negotiate for you. Let them do all the dirty work, baby.

• 22:36Bobby Lee?

  Easily create a personalized budget with custom categories to help keep your spending on track. See your monthly spending trends in each category to know exactly where your money is going.

• 22:47Andrew Santino?

  Rocket Money has over 5 billion users, has saved a total of 500 million in canceled subscriptions, saving members up to $740 a year when using all of the app's premium features.

• 22:55Bobby Lee?

  Cancel your unwanted subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster with Rocket Money. Go to rocketmoney.com/badfriends today.

• 23:02Andrew Santino?

  That's rocketmoney.com/badfriends.

• 23:04Bobby Lee?

  Rocketmoney.com/badfriends. Shopify. If you run a small business, you know there's nothing small about it. As a business owner, I get it. Our business is and has always been all-consuming since we started.

• 23:19Andrew Santino?

  That is exactly true. Shopify is the commerce platform behind millions of businesses around the world and 10% of all e-commerce in the United States. From household names like Mattel and Jimm Shark to brands just getting started, perhaps like Bad Friends.

• 23:33Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I mean, we love Shopify. We use it and we only use the best. Tackle all the important tasks in one place, from inventory to payments to analytics and more.

• 23:41Andrew Santino?

  Shopify makes the marketing minefield easy with built-in tools for running social media and email campaigns so you can find new customers and keep them.

• 23:48Bobby Lee?

  And if you're looking to grow your business internationally, we love Japan and Ireland.

• 23:53Andrew Santino?

  Yes, we do.

• 23:53Bobby Lee?

  Shopify has global selling tools to help you in over 150 countries.

• 23:58Andrew Santino?

  Get all the big stuff for your small business right with Shopify. Sign up for your $1 per month trial and start selling today at Shopify.com/badfriends.

• 24:07Bobby Lee?

  Go to Shopify.com/badfriends.

• 24:10Andrew Santino?

  Shopify.com/badfriends.

• 24:14Speaker 08

  Visible puts the ultimate wireless hack in the palm of your hand. With unlimited 5G wireless data and hotspot designed to keep you connected. Powered by Verizon's 5G network. And no contract holding you back. Plans start at $25 a month. Or get the premium Visible Plus Pro Plan and save $10 on your first month when you use promo code hack. Make the switch at visible.com. Terms apply. See visible.com for details.

• 24:44Bobby Lee?

  As you know, I just did a movie in Oklahoma City.

• 24:49Bobby Lee?

  With a bunch of young Hollywood. Name some of the names. No. You can. I don't want to. Why not? It'd be a surprise. You did to me at lunch. You bragged at lunch.

• 24:58Speaker 05

  On the phone with me.

• 24:59Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, you bragged at lunch. I like he pretends like he's not Mr. Hollywood, then he bragged. Brag, brag, brag. Oh, God. You bragged. Yeah, today's not good. Happy birthday. It's not good today. Happy birthday. I feel like being assaulted.

• 25:12Speaker 05

  I'm liking it.

• 25:13Bobby Lee?

  Okay, so, um.

• 25:16Bobby Lee?

  I was in Oklahoma City. You were. I felt depressed. And I thought, maybe I should use.

• 25:23Bobby Lee?

  That I don't like. You're right. So guess what I did?

• 25:26Speaker 05

  Use?

• 25:26Bobby Lee?

  I, no. Went to a meeting. I took my phone out. I have this meetings app on my phone. Yeah. I went to a meeting. Good. And I felt good. Then what did I do the next day? I went to another meeting. Good. And then, uh, there was a kid in the movie that was also sober. Good. I took him to a meeting. Okay, and then I went to Dallas to do, what's his name's show?

• 25:47Speaker 05

  Dr. Phil.

• 25:48Bobby Lee?

  Dr. Phil.

• 25:51Bobby Lee?

  Yeah? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Dr. Phil. And I know you have some feelings about that, too. We could share later. Yeah. Yeah. Share whenever. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But, um, something magical happened. I was at a mall. I was planning to go to a meeting, but I went to a mall first to get some shoes. I was walking around and I see a kid and he has these gigantic throat stab wounds in his throat. Stab wounds? Yeah, yeah. Jesus. They're super thick, right? Why are you laughing?

• 26:18Speaker 05

  How do you know they're stab wounds?

• 26:20Bobby Lee?

  Cause I asked him. Are those stab wounds? I go, do, what the fuck? He goes, yeah, you know, when I was super like using, I used to stab myself in the neck. And he goes, but he, he teared up and he was like, you got me sober. No, that's awesome. And I go, what? And he goes, I mean, you talk about sobriety. And then, um, I go, what do you do tonight? I go, how many meetings have been going? He hasn't been meetings in years.

• 26:46Andrew Santino?

  The throat stab guy didn't go to meetings?

• 26:48Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 26:49Andrew Santino?

  I would assume he would be on track.

• 26:50Bobby Lee?

  So I go, you know, you, you, you, you're not doing it for you. You're doing it to help others.

• 26:54Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 26:55Bobby Lee?

  So I said to meet me at this random meeting and he showed up.

• 26:59Andrew Santino?

  Good.

• 26:59Bobby Lee?

  We sat next to each other and I think he, there was a shift that happened. Why are you smiling?

• 27:05Andrew Santino?

  No, I just think it feels good to hear this. I think this is very important.

• 27:08Bobby Lee?

  And then afterwards, we, um, I found his body.

• 27:14Andrew Santino?

  I knew it.

• 27:15Bobby Lee?

  Cause he wanted a tattoo of my signature, yeah, right on the chest.

• 27:18Andrew Santino?

  He got a tattoo?

• 27:19Bobby Lee?

  Of my, of my signature on the chest.

• 27:21Andrew Santino?

  Oh, boy.

• 27:22Bobby Lee?

  And then he got me two pants.

• 27:24Andrew Santino?

  He bought you pants?

• 27:25Bobby Lee?

  From the store that, yeah, he works at a store. I go, I like these, I like these pants, but, and so, um, I don't know, but I didn't get them, but he got me two brand new pairs. And then, um.

• 27:38Andrew Santino?

  Can I say something?

• 27:38Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 27:39Andrew Santino?

  I mean this when I say this.

• 27:40Bobby Lee?

  Hmm.

• 27:41Andrew Santino?

  I think the work that you do in the sober world is.

• 27:43Bobby Lee?

  That's not what I'm saying.

• 27:44Andrew Santino?

  Can I just finish? I think it's extremely important and I think there's a ton of people that listen to this show. They'd either use, used to use, have trouble, have thoughts, and I think it's a great world to put our audience in to know that.

• 28:00Bobby Lee?

  Are you being real right now?

• 28:01Andrew Santino?

  Do I sound?

• 28:01Bobby Lee?

  I feel like there's a joke coming.

• 28:03Andrew Santino?

  I'm not.

• 28:03Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, okay.

• 28:04Andrew Santino?

  I think it's a.

• 28:05Bobby Lee?

  Beans on toast or something. Is there a beans on toast coming?

• 28:08Andrew Santino?

  There was.

• 28:09Bobby Lee?

  Okay, I know what.

• 28:10Andrew Santino?

  No, I think it's a beautiful, important thing to do as a child of addiction, as someone whose best friend is an addict, whose friend, we have a lot of friends that have lost their lives to it. I think it's important that you do stuff like that. I really mean it. I think it's imperative to the future of people who are struggling to hear you, a famous guy. Who, who, by the way. What, you guys are laughing? All right, I'll stop. I'll stop.

• 28:36Bobby Lee?

  No, I, I, I'm telling you why the disrespect from Andreas.

• 28:39Andrew Santino?

  It's insane.

• 28:40Speaker 02

  What did I do?

• 28:40Andrew Santino?

  I'm being fucking serious.

• 28:41Bobby Lee?

  Because literally when you're saying something very sincere and heartfelt.

• 28:44Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 28:44Bobby Lee?

  And real, and I, dude, I felt it, dude.

• 28:47Andrew Santino?

  I'm trying to be.

• 28:48Bobby Lee?

  Dude, I'm connected to you. This is what I see from this guy.

• 28:50Andrew Santino?

  You're mocking me.

• 28:51Bobby Lee?

  No, him. This is what Andreas is doing.

• 28:56Bobby Lee?

  For like 10 seconds looking at something, doing a smirk.

• 28:59Andrew Santino?

  Okay.

• 29:00Bobby Lee?

  And I'm going, what the fuck dude?

• 29:01Andrew Santino?

  What I'm saying is boring and I don't care.

• 29:03Bobby Lee?

  No, I love it.

• 29:04Andrew Santino?

  I guess it's boring.

• 29:04Bobby Lee?

  You think what?

• 29:05Andrew Santino?

  I think it matters. I think it's an important part of life. You know, it's the same way when somebody comes up to me or emails us and says, hey, man, I was gonna kill myself last year. My mom died in June. My dad left us. And listening to the show makes me feel good. These moments changed my life. I think it's fucking important. They make me feel like what I'm doing when I'm sitting on an airplane and it's 40 minutes late and I'm bummed out and it's freezing and they lost my bag and I'm gonna be late to the thing and I'm pissed off and I didn't eat. I go, oh, this is all worth it because somebody gets joy from our thing.

• 29:39Bobby Lee?

  I know it.

• 29:40Andrew Santino?

  And you give people joy by giving them hope in the process of comedy.

• 29:44Bobby Lee?

  I know what you're gonna say next.

• 29:45Andrew Santino?

  Beans on toast.

• 29:46Bobby Lee?

  No.

• 29:46Andrew Santino?

  I'm Bobby mom.

• 29:48Bobby Lee?

  So, um, what, what I'm saying though is not, not that I did anything.

• 29:53Andrew Santino?

  Yes, you did.

• 29:54Bobby Lee?

  No, I didn't. I didn't do anything. What I'm saying is, is that I believe that when you make a choice like, I'm gonna really commit to sobriety, you're open, right? To situations that you, you may be able to help somebody indirectly almost, you know? I mean, I didn't do anything. I just said, hey dude, let's meet me at this meeting.

• 30:12Andrew Santino?

  That's very direct.

• 30:13Bobby Lee?

  This?

• 30:14Andrew Santino?

  Yeah. Hey, come with me to this thing.

• 30:17Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 30:17Andrew Santino?

  You're lending a hand. Anyway, we'll move on from the sober community, but I do think it's an important thing.

• 30:22Bobby Lee?

  I just not that funny today.

• 30:23Andrew Santino?

  It doesn't matter. That's not about, this isn't, this is about us being real. You wanna be funny? We'll go back to making fun of Andres.

• 30:29Bobby Lee?

  Oh, yeah.

• 30:30Andrew Santino?

  It's easy. Go for it. Look at that shirt. By the way, I had McCone search hell and high water to find Spanish stores, okay? Go all over LA. By the way, Desidual, Dejual? Your shirt company that you love so much? Is that a Desidual shirt?

• 30:43Speaker 05

  It is.

• 30:44Andrew Santino?

  You know that fucking dump is, it's closed all over the world. There's like three left.

• 30:48Speaker 05

  Just in the US.

• 30:49Bobby Lee?

  I have a question.

• 30:50Andrew Santino?

  There's one in Gaza.

• 30:53Andrew Santino?

  It's insane how little of them. There's none in the US.

• 30:55Bobby Lee?

  Are there no white strips in Spain? Why are your teeth so yellow?

• 30:58Andrew Santino?

  Jesus Christ, there he goes.

• 30:59Bobby Lee?

  Is that too much? Yeah. Is that too much?

• 31:01Andrew Santino?

  Oh, it hit him. That one hit him.

• 31:03Bobby Lee?

  I know. Because, yeah.

• 31:04Speaker 05

  My teeth are yellow.

• 31:06Speaker 05

  You have no real teeth. That's why yours are so white.

• 31:14Andrew Santino?

  There he goes.

• 31:15Bobby Lee?

  It's going, it's just today.

• 31:16Andrew Santino?

  He's hitting ya.

• 31:17Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, he did hit me. Yeah, very good.

• 31:18Andrew Santino?

  You know, because it's your birthday, why don't you throw a couple insults at us?

• 31:20Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, go ahead. Yeah.

• 31:22Andrew Santino?

  Go ahead.

• 31:22Speaker 05

  No, I love you guys.

• 31:24Bobby Lee?

  No. Okay. Are you doing, let me, can I ask you another simple question?

• 31:28Speaker 05

  Sure.

• 31:29Bobby Lee?

  You're doing a Mohawk Andre Agassi on the side thing here, or what?

• 31:33Speaker 05

  You'll have to wait a few more months.

• 31:35Bobby Lee?

  Is that what you request in Turkey or wherever you went?

• 31:38Andrew Santino?

  It's gonna be good.

• 31:38Bobby Lee?

  What I want is a Mohawk like-

• 31:40Speaker 05

  Wait for Christmas.

• 31:41Bobby Lee?

  Like taxi driver in the end, right? And then put fucking Andre Agassi-

• 31:44Speaker 05

  It's gonna be a Christmas miracle.

• 31:45Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 31:46Andrew Santino?

  Wait for Christmas.

• 31:47Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 31:48Andrew Santino?

  My hair will come in. Just wait for Christmas.

• 31:53Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 31:54Andrew Santino?

  Look here, my friend. Fancy, do you have anything planned with your wife for your birthday? Do you have, do you guys have any-

• 31:59Bobby Lee?

  You call him Fitzy?

• 32:00Andrew Santino?

  Huh?

• 32:01Bobby Lee?

  You call them Fitzy?

• 32:02Andrew Santino?

  Fancy?

• 32:03Bobby Lee?

  Oh, you, okay.

• 32:03Andrew Santino?

  Where the fuck have you been?

• 32:04Bobby Lee?

  I don't know.

• 32:05Andrew Santino?

  I've been doing this for five years.

• 32:06Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 32:06Andrew Santino?

  Fans?

• 32:07Speaker 05

  We're taking our daughter to Disneyland, so nothing.

• 32:09Andrew Santino?

  Are you really?

• 32:10Bobby Lee?

  Unbelievable you have kids. Oh my god, it's crazy!

• 32:13Andrew Santino?

  Wait a minute, have you already bought the tickets?

• 32:15Speaker 05

  Yeah, not everybody waits until they're sixty.

• 32:18Bobby Lee?

  What did you say?

• 32:19Andrew Santino?

  Not everybody waits till they're sixty to have kids.

• 32:21Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, okay, okay.

• 32:22Andrew Santino?

  Shots again.

• 32:22Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 32:23Andrew Santino?

  Have you bought tickets?

• 32:24Speaker 05

  Uh, soon.

• 32:26Andrew Santino?

  Have you, okay, can Bad Friends buy the Fastpass for you guys or whatever?

• 32:30Speaker 05

  Sure.

• 32:30Andrew Santino?

  That could be the birthday gift.

• 32:32Bobby Lee?

  You know, you know what you need?

• 32:33Andrew Santino?

  You know the irony of it?

• 32:34Bobby Lee?

  Chaperone.

• 32:35Speaker 05

  Oh, god.

• 32:36Andrew Santino?

  Let's do chaperone.

• 32:37Bobby Lee?

  That's eight grand.

• 32:38Andrew Santino?

  Let's do the regular thing.

• 32:41Speaker 05

  I thought you would have to be a chaperone.

• 32:43Andrew Santino?

  We would chaperone you. You know what the funny thing was? My wife literally said that. She goes, "What if you buy him tickets to take this kid to Disneyland?" I go, "They don't fucking, he doesn't want that for his birthday gift." That's exactly what we're gonna do.

• 32:53Bobby Lee?

  No, but the chaperone, I'll tell, you know how it works, right?

• 32:56Speaker 05

  Not really.

• 32:57Bobby Lee?

  Do you know how it works?

• 32:57Andrew Santino?

  I'm not, I've never done it, I don't know.

• 32:59Bobby Lee?

  We should do it.

• 32:59Andrew Santino?

  No, no, no.

• 33:00Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, I've done it.

• 33:01Speaker 05

  Andre and I went once and got the Superfast-

• 33:04Andrew Santino?

  We did Universal Studios.

• 33:06Speaker 05

  Universal Studios, and then you didn't show up.

• 33:07Bobby Lee?

  Disneyland, no, Disneyland, I'll tell you how it works.

• 33:09Andrew Santino?

  But wait a minute, we did buy Superfast pass at Universal for Halloween Horror Nights. You didn't even show up.

• 33:14Speaker 05

  You didn't show up.

• 33:14Andrew Santino?

  You bailed.

• 33:15Bobby Lee?

  I know.

• 33:15Andrew Santino?

  Everybody else showed up except for you.

• 33:17Bobby Lee?

  I know.

• 33:17Andrew Santino?

  Jules showed up.

• 33:19Speaker 05

  Yes.

• 33:19Andrew Santino?

  And you didn't show up.

• 33:20Bobby Lee?

  Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Anyway, um, I'll tell, can I tell you how it works?

• 33:23Speaker 05

  Yes.

• 33:24Andrew Santino?

  Please.

• 33:24Bobby Lee?

  You pay for it.

• 33:26Andrew Santino?

  Okay.

• 33:28Andrew Santino?

  Sounds pretty easy.

• 33:28Bobby Lee?

  And then you show up.

• 33:29Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 33:30Bobby Lee?

  And you show up at the log, there's a log cabin-y kind of fucking, oh, sorry, oh. You're right.

• 33:35Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 33:35Bobby Lee?

  Log cabin-y, kind of like a hotel-y lobby thing.

• 33:39Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 33:39Bobby Lee?

  Where there's like, you know, a fire.

• 33:43Bobby Lee?

  Very descriptive, right?

• 33:44Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, what is this? You're like-

• 33:45Bobby Lee?

  So then a lady in that suit shows up and she goes, "Bobby?" I go, "Yeah, I'm your chaperone for today." Right? And then you go, "Oh, where do we go?" She goes, "Go wherever you want to go." I go, "We don't have to wait in line?" She goes, "No."

• 33:56Andrew Santino?

  Wow.

• 33:57Bobby Lee?

  So you can go anywhere, like if you-

• 33:58Andrew Santino?

  Eight grand per person?

• 34:00Bobby Lee?

  No, for the whole group.

• 34:01Andrew Santino?

  Per family.

• 34:01Bobby Lee?

  So you can get a group of 10 and pay 8.

• 34:05Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 34:05Bobby Lee?

  Right? And then you don't have to, like, that roller coaster at California Dreamin', I don't get the Asian ones.

• 34:11Andrew Santino?

  They didn't offer you her?

• 34:12Bobby Lee?

  They're too quick.

• 34:13Speaker 05

  They only had one.

• 34:13Bobby Lee?

  "Let's go, let's go, let's go." Yeah, I can't catch up. Yeah, yeah.

• 34:16Andrew Santino?

  In the middle of the ride, "Get off the ride!"

• 34:18Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. But it's pretty convenient.

• 34:21Andrew Santino?

  Well, yeah, if you have enough money, this seems like this is the move. Would you like this fancy for your birthday? Or would you like to keep your job?

• 34:28Speaker 05

  Yes.

• 34:29Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. Although-

• 34:31Speaker 05

  We all do it.

• 34:32Bobby Lee?

  Although it really, you know, that money really took a, I took a hit.

• 34:36Andrew Santino?

  I mean, it's not a cheap experience.

• 34:37Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, so, you know, guys, I don't, you know.

• 34:39Andrew Santino?

  How about this, though? No, I've never even heard of this experience, but it is-

• 34:44Bobby Lee?

  Adam Levine told me about it.

• 34:47Speaker 05

  Yeah, that's why some people don't do it.

• 34:49Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 34:49Andrew Santino?

  Resort VIP tours.

• 34:51Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 34:52Andrew Santino?

  Are you richer than all of your friends? Get ready for a day without poor people.

• 34:56Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 34:57Andrew Santino?

  Call 714- I mean, that's literally what-

• 34:59Bobby Lee?

  Well, I would have done it if I wasn't trying to oppress a girl.

• 35:01Andrew Santino?

  You should tell me that. That is true.

• 35:02Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, I, and this is the first I was meeting her son. And I'm like, "I wanna," you know, me, because I'd never met the kid before.

• 35:09Andrew Santino?

  You told me, and it's a great move.

• 35:10Bobby Lee?

  Right, so like, I wanna give him, but then he left his lightsaber at the park and I got mad.

• 35:15Andrew Santino?

  It is crazy to think, though, like, that kid's first, his first experience is this. Like, like, we have a family friend of ours, you know, my buddy, I'll say it off the air.

• 35:23Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 35:24Andrew Santino?

  His, his sister, their kids have never ridden on a commercial airline. They've only flown private.

• 35:31Bobby Lee?

  Wow.

• 35:32Andrew Santino?

  They're little kids, so they have no fucking idea what it's like to go to an airport. Ever.

• 35:36Bobby Lee?

  Right.

• 35:37Andrew Santino?

  They have no clue. So like little kids that grow up in this world, they don't know what it's like to go to Disneyland.

• 35:40Bobby Lee?

  Well, this kid, I fucked him up, I think.

• 35:42Andrew Santino?

  You did, I'm saying.

• 35:43Bobby Lee?

  Cause he can never go to Disneyland again.

• 35:45Andrew Santino?

  No, he'll be like, where's the, where's the Asian woman who tours us around?

• 35:48Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 35:48Andrew Santino?

  I want her again.

• 35:49Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 35:49Andrew Santino?

  Because this, this is, this is the spoils of the riches. I mean, this is like, that's fancy pants. Look, I could get you some all access wild shit because now, you know, we work for the mouse.

• 35:58Bobby Lee?

  But if we go, if we go as a group.

• 36:00Speaker 05

  Yeah, if we go as a group.

• 36:01Bobby Lee?

  With your kids.

• 36:03Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 36:03Bobby Lee?

  So maybe we can get to know your family. I've never met that.

• 36:06Speaker 05

  I know you love, you will love that. So absolutely.

• 36:09Andrew Santino?

  He has one child, just one kid.

• 36:11Bobby Lee?

  Oh, whatever.

• 36:11Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 36:12Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. One, two, doesn't mean.

• 36:13Andrew Santino?

  You've met, you've met his wife. She's been here.

• 36:17Bobby Lee?

  I've jerked off to her.

• 36:20Bobby Lee?

  Why, is that wrong?

• 36:22Speaker 05

  No.

• 36:22Bobby Lee?

  How is that wrong?

• 36:23Andrew Santino?

  And the whole time in your mind, you're going, see, see, see.

• 36:26Bobby Lee?

  If I said to you, I jerked off to your wife, why would that be wrong?

• 36:29Andrew Santino?

  It's not, it's fine. It's a fantasy.

• 36:30Bobby Lee?

  Right? Did that offend you? Yeah. What would hurt is I would never jerk off.

• 36:35Speaker 05

  Right.

• 36:35Bobby Lee?

  Right?

• 36:35Speaker 05

  Yes.

• 36:36Andrew Santino?

  That would be hurtful.

• 36:37Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 36:38Andrew Santino?

  If you said, you know, the girl that you're with, never. I, I get it. That's a compliment. By the way, at lunch today, you said, or at dinner tonight, you said, no, no more women, done, period.

• 36:47Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 36:48Andrew Santino?

  Over.

• 36:48Bobby Lee?

  I'm done.

• 36:49Andrew Santino?

  No more dating. Are you off the sites?

• 36:50Bobby Lee?

  Off the sites, not doing any of it.

• 36:52Andrew Santino?

  Wow.

• 36:53Bobby Lee?

  Do you know why? It's over. That's why. It's not gonna happen again.

• 36:56Andrew Santino?

  No, come on.

• 36:57Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. It's over! Beep, beep, beep. Train's dead. I know what the beep beep is about, but it's, it's fucking over. I'll tell you why, dude. All right. There's a lot of deception going on. There's a lot of this going on, right? Hey, you wanna, you know, go out this night, right? And they go, yes. And then the night comes, I make reservations and they bail.

• 37:15Andrew Santino?

  On the night of the.

• 37:16Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, where I make reservations, you know what I mean? And I have a whole, and then I have to take the night off of stand up. Right? Take the night off, right? And then they bail. It's just like, all right. Like tomorrow night, um.

• 37:29Bobby Lee?

  I'm going to a place, I'm gonna meet somebody very special tomorrow night. Bon Joon Ho.

• 37:35Andrew Santino?

  You're going to meet Bon Joon Ho tomorrow night?

• 37:37Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 37:38Andrew Santino?

  Where? Mr. Hollywood?

• 37:41Bobby Lee?

  Mr. Soul.

• 37:43Andrew Santino?

  Mr. Soul?

• 37:44Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 37:44Andrew Santino?

  Bon Joon Ho, you're gonna meet him? That's incredible. Where are you guys gonna go meet?

• 37:49Bobby Lee?

  He's having an art exhibition and then his producers called me and said he, you're invited and we want you to come.

• 37:55Andrew Santino?

  Wow, I wish I got stuff like that.

• 37:57Bobby Lee?

  You can come with me.

• 37:58Andrew Santino?

  No, no, no, it's okay.

• 37:59Bobby Lee?

  Anyway, what I'm saying is that I'm done with women and um...

• 38:02Andrew Santino?

  Bon Joon Ho?

• 38:03Bobby Lee?

  I'm off the sites and um, I am feverishly masturbating but um, you know what I mean, I need to stop that.

• 38:11Andrew Santino?

  What are we talking? Twice a day?

• 38:13Bobby Lee?

  No, I've been doing it twice but now like every other day now.

• 38:16Andrew Santino?

  Every other day?

• 38:17Bobby Lee?

  Remember that? Because the other day I was doing 14 days in a row I didn't do it.

• 38:19Andrew Santino?

  That's good.

• 38:21Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, and then um, so...

• 38:22Andrew Santino?

  Alright, so no more women, so it's just Bon Joon Ho from now on.

• 38:25Speaker 04

  You can't seek love, it's gotta find you, Bob.

• 38:27Bobby Lee?

  I think that's not right, but um, no, I think you're right, I think you're right. I think, here's what it is, I think it's just either gonna happen or not.

• 38:35Andrew Santino?

  You think so?

• 38:35Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, because it's like, also you know, I swipe all the time on Raya and I get no hits.

• 38:40Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, but that's a, that's not a real website. Every time I see my friends that are on those, that Raya one?

• 38:44Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 38:44Andrew Santino?

  That's almost like, it's just Instagram, it's like showing off to, for the sake of showing off.

• 38:49Bobby Lee?

  I mean, I can even go to my uh...

• 38:51Andrew Santino?

  I've never met one person that's dated off Raya for real. Maybe hook up, maybe. But everybody I know, girls and guys, they say the same shit.

• 38:58Speaker 05

  I have this fantasy of doing a Bad Friends Bachelor Edition where like, we have women coming to meet with Bobby and then we do a full show.

• 39:05Andrew Santino?

  So that's what you jerk off to?

• 39:06Bobby Lee?

  Can we, alright, can we go into some of my messaging at Raya?

• 39:09Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 39:10Bobby Lee?

  And see if I'm doing it right?

• 39:11Speaker 04

  I thought you deleted it.

• 39:12Bobby Lee?

  Oh no, I lied.

• 39:15Bobby Lee?

  I lied, sorry.

• 39:16Andrew Santino?

  Five seconds ago, I deleted all the app.

• 39:18Bobby Lee?

  Alright, so let's start, let's randomly start, okay? So I sent a message to this Alexandra. Oh, that's a long thing.

• 39:24Andrew Santino?

  Let me see.

• 39:26Bobby Lee?

  And then, I don't know if I'm, oh yeah, I'm blue. "Are you still in LA? Sadly I am." I go, "Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha." "Why don't you like it?" "Was it good so far?"

• 39:37Andrew Santino?

  No.

• 39:38Bobby Lee?

  Oh fuck.

• 39:39Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, it's already bad.

• 39:39Bobby Lee?

  Let's go back.

• 39:40Speaker 04

  Korean Joker.

• 39:42Bobby Lee?

  I'm doing Korean Joker?

• 39:43Speaker 06

  "Why don't you like it?"

• 39:46Andrew Santino?

  I mean, it does sound like a murder, what a murderer would say.

• 39:48Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 39:50Speaker 06

  "You don't want to stay?"

• 39:53Bobby Lee?

  I go highs apostrophe ass. Is that good?

• 39:56Speaker 04

  No.

• 39:57Andrew Santino?

  No, I mean, I don't think so.

• 39:58Bobby Lee?

  She goes, hey, and I go, I sent a message through Insta if that's cool. Nothing.

• 40:04Andrew Santino?

  Well, why? I don't understand.

• 40:06Bobby Lee?

  Why are you laughing?

• 40:07Speaker 04

  Cause girls specifically don't like that when they message.

• 40:09Bobby Lee?

  Oh, fuck!

• 40:10Andrew Santino?

  Wait, why would you do that instead of just continuing the chat there?

• 40:12Bobby Lee?

  Because there's no like, I don't really look at my Ryan notification.

• 40:16Andrew Santino?

  Oh, got it.

• 40:16Bobby Lee?

  You know what I mean? Sometimes days will go by.

• 40:18Andrew Santino?

  I got it.

• 40:18Bobby Lee?

  You wanna read one?

• 40:19Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 40:19Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, go ahead.

• 40:20Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, hello.

• 40:24Bobby Lee?

  Is that me?

• 40:25Andrew Santino?

  You said hi. She said, well, hello, and then you bailed.

• 40:29Bobby Lee?

  Let me look, let me look, let me look.

• 40:31Andrew Santino?

  Why? And by the way, well, this is so long ago. It says, this is 2022.

• 40:35Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, look at the photo.

• 40:36Andrew Santino?

  Let's get another one. No, she looks cute.

• 40:38Bobby Lee?

  Okay, fuck.

• 40:38Andrew Santino?

  Let's get a more recent one. You went back so far.

• 40:41Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 40:42Andrew Santino?

  All right, how about Ariana?

• 40:44Speaker 05

  From yesterday.

• 40:46Andrew Santino?

  I do live in LA. You live in LA? I do. I try to get out. Are you here? I'm here. Let's communicate. Let's communicate through Instagram. Be nice.

• 40:54Speaker 05

  Your game is outstanding.

• 40:59Andrew Santino?

  How about another one?

• 41:03Speaker 05

  That's like my comedy. Hello, hello.

• 41:04Andrew Santino?

  Well, this one's.

• 41:08Bobby Lee?

  Hello, everybody. Blue chew. Let me tell you guys, I'm a 53-year-old man, sexually active, and without BlueChew, I got nothing.

• 41:16Andrew Santino?

  You don't.

• 41:16Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I'm, what?

• 41:18Andrew Santino?

  No, you do great without it.

• 41:19Bobby Lee?

  I know, but what I'm saying, this really, really does help me, dude.

• 41:21Andrew Santino?

  It really does.

• 41:22Bobby Lee?

  If I wanna get aroused, I wanna be, you know, I mean, ready to be at bat, I go BlueChew.

• 41:28Andrew Santino?

  You dig in and have some BlueChew.

• 41:30Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 41:30Andrew Santino?

  Uh, BlueChew tablets are made in the USA, prepared, shipped directly to your door. The best part is, take them anytime, day or night, anywhere. Plan ahead, be ready whenever an opportunity arises, and it's done online. No doctor visits, no awkward conversations, no waiting line at the pharmacy. Be like Bobby Lee. Get yourself some BlueChew.

• 41:46Bobby Lee?

  And, and BlueChew is tablets are made in the USA.

• 41:50Andrew Santino?

  You, hey!

• 41:50Bobby Lee?

  Prepared and shipped directly to your door. You can take them anytime, day or night, so you can plan ahead or be ready whenever an opportunity arises.

• 41:57Andrew Santino?

  That's right. You wanna get bricked up like Bobby Lee. If you wanna get hard as a rock.

• 42:00Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 42:01Andrew Santino?

  Rock Lee, they call him. Make life easier by getting harder. Pebbley?

• 42:04Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, Pebbley.

• 42:05Andrew Santino?

  All right, well, make life easier by getting harder like Pebbley and discover your options at bluechew.com. We've got a special deal for our listeners. Try your first month of Blue Chew free. Visit bluechew.com for more details and important safety information, and we thank BlueChew for sponsoring the podcast.

• 42:18Bobby Lee?

  DraftKings Sportsbook! The NBA 82 game grind is done, and now the real fun begins. The NBA playoffs are here, and it's time for all the high stakes drama, clutch moments, and draft dropping plays.

• 42:31Andrew Santino?

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• 42:46Bobby Lee?

  Will Micah go under?

• 42:47Andrew Santino?

  Will he go under?

• 42:48Bobby Lee?

  He might not even be either.

• 42:49Andrew Santino?

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• 42:57Bobby Lee?

  Oh.

• 42:58Andrew Santino?

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• 43:13Bobby Lee?

  In Connecticut, help is available for problem gambling. Call 888-789-7777 or visit ccpg.org. Please play responsibly. On behalf of Boot Hill Casino and Resort Kansas, 21-plus age and eligibility varies by jurisdiction.

• 43:29Andrew Santino?

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• 43:38Speaker 08

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• 44:08Andrew Santino?

  I'll tell you, this one hurts. This one hurts my feelings.

• 44:13Bobby Lee?

  Okay, go ahead.

• 44:15Andrew Santino?

  She says, "My best friend is a comedian in LA." Anyway, you have to give me a heads up when your tickets go on sale, so I don't miss it. "I'll comp you, no pay." How Asian are you? "I'll comp you, no pay."

• 44:26Bobby Lee?

  It's the way you're saying it. Say it in a southern accent.

• 44:30Andrew Santino?

  "I'll comp you, no pay."

• 44:32Bobby Lee?

  You're right, it's Asian.

• 44:34Bobby Lee?

  You're right.

• 44:34Andrew Santino?

  "I'll comp you, no pay."

• 44:35Bobby Lee?

  And then, nothing after that?

• 44:37Andrew Santino?

  She goes, "Oh, thanks. I hope Oklahoma went well for you." That's so nice.

• 44:42Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 44:42Andrew Santino?

  Then he didn't respond.

• 44:43Bobby Lee?

  Is that recently?

• 44:44Andrew Santino?

  March 12th, so that was like a week, over a week ago.

• 44:46Bobby Lee?

  Let me see, let me see.

• 44:47Andrew Santino?

  You screwed up on that one.

• 44:48Bobby Lee?

  Why?

• 44:49Andrew Santino?

  Why wouldn't you hit her back and go, "It did go well."

• 44:50Bobby Lee?

  Okay, okay.

• 44:51Andrew Santino?

  What's going on? You want to meet Bung Jun Ho?

• 44:54Bobby Lee?

  No, no.

• 44:55Andrew Santino?

  Throw that in there.

• 44:56Bobby Lee?

  I mean, some of them is hard because she lives in Austin.

• 44:59Andrew Santino?

  Oh, then never mind, I didn't.

• 45:00Bobby Lee?

  And she has children.

• 45:02Andrew Santino?

  You gotta get over that, dude, you're 52.

• 45:03Bobby Lee?

  No, I love it, no, I love kids! Yeah, I love them.

• 45:06Andrew Santino?

  Don't say that.

• 45:07Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. I love the little ones.

• 45:09Andrew Santino?

  You love when people have kids.

• 45:10Bobby Lee?

  I don't, yeah, yeah. I don't have anything against them.

• 45:12Andrew Santino?

  You have to accept the fact that that's a reality. Like our good friend Nick Christ. He was looking for love, he's been in and out, he met, he fell in love deeply with someone who has a kid. Life is good.

• 45:22Bobby Lee?

  Oh, is that who, she has a kid?

• 45:23Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 45:24Bobby Lee?

  Oh, I didn't know that.

• 45:24Andrew Santino?

  And he's been a wonderful, I don't even know what the labels are now, but... Dude, you have to get over the fact you are at an age you are going to meet someone with a kid.

• 45:31Bobby Lee?

  What about this, though? I went on a date with somebody last week, and her kids are teenagers, two boys.

• 45:37Andrew Santino?

  That's great.

• 45:37Bobby Lee?

  And they're gigantic fans of mine.

• 45:39Andrew Santino?

  Well, no, but the good news is...

• 45:40Bobby Lee?

  She'll go like, "Um, what does, um, 'I'm Bobby Ma' mean?" I go, "Oh, nothing, don't worry, yeah."

• 45:46Andrew Santino?

  Just call me.

• 45:46Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, um, "What's Down Syndrome?" I go, "What do you mean?" She's like, "Something happened?" Like, she doesn't, she's not a fan, she gets it all from her kids.

• 45:54Andrew Santino?

  Well, but the good news is if they're teens, that means they're gonna be 18 and be out of the house soon. Then you got the house to yourself again. So you're really just planning, find a woman with a kid who's 16, 17. Then you're in good shape.

• 46:04Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, but if she's in her 40s, I can't have kids.

• 46:07Andrew Santino?

  That's not true. What do you mean that's not true? Oh, you want to have with kids with her?

• 46:10Bobby Lee?

  I want to have kids.

• 46:11Andrew Santino?

  Well, then here's the deal, dude.

• 46:12Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 46:12Andrew Santino?

  Why don't you go knock up a young stripper? Have a baby.

• 46:16Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 46:16Andrew Santino?

  Pay the stripper to let you keep the baby.

• 46:19Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 46:19Andrew Santino?

  And then, you know.

• 46:21Bobby Lee?

  No.

• 46:21Andrew Santino?

  Meet a woman.

• 46:22Bobby Lee?

  That doesn't sound right.

• 46:23Andrew Santino?

  You don't want to raise a kid?

• 46:24Bobby Lee?

  So I go down the seventh veil. I pay the cover.

• 46:27Andrew Santino?

  Girls, girls, girls.

• 46:28Bobby Lee?

  Oh, girls, girls, girls.

• 46:29Andrew Santino?

  Well, tell them at the door, I don't want to pay cover. I'm trying to have a baby with all these girls.

• 46:33Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, okay. And then I go, what do I say? During the lap dance.

• 46:37Andrew Santino?

  I'll give you 50 grand to have my child. And let me keep it. And then you don't have to be involved. This happens on the other way, by the way. There's women that tell men, "I want to have a baby with you, but I don't want you involved in the life of the baby." Why can't a guy do that?

• 46:50Speaker 05

  You don't need a stripper. You can just do it. Normal, like that.

• 46:53Andrew Santino?

  I don't know if anybody but a stripper would do it.

• 46:55Speaker 05

  Like, uh.

• 46:56Andrew Santino?

  For him.

• 46:57Speaker 05

  The Kardashian woman did it.

• 46:59Andrew Santino?

  Who is this?

• 47:00Speaker 05

  Just.

• 47:01Andrew Santino?

  By the way, this is not to say, I love dancers. You're well respected.

• 47:03Bobby Lee?

  You're respected, yeah.

• 47:04Andrew Santino?

  You're well respe- I'm just saying.

• 47:05Bobby Lee?

  There should be, I just created an app.

• 47:08Andrew Santino?

  There's an app.

• 47:09Bobby Lee?

  No, we created an app.

• 47:10Andrew Santino?

  What is it?

• 47:11Bobby Lee?

  Women that want to do that.

• 47:13Andrew Santino?

  Women that want to do that?

• 47:14Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 47:15Andrew Santino?

  Please download Women That Want To Do That.

• 47:16Bobby Lee?

  No, no, no. What I'm saying, women that want to be surrogates or whatever.

• 47:19Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, it's a surrogate.

• 47:19Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 47:20Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 47:20Bobby Lee?

  And then it's an app. You can swipe through. They can give their college education. If it's a device, fine.

• 47:26Andrew Santino?

  It's called, uh, No Mommy, Yes Poppy.

• 47:28Bobby Lee?

  Yes.

• 47:29Andrew Santino?

  No Mommy, Yes Poppy.

• 47:30Bobby Lee?

  Right. And then you go, how much? And you get, you know, you do, you know.

• 47:32Andrew Santino?

  It's the same. There is surrogacy, right? There is for people that can't get you looking into surrogacy. Same kind of thing.

• 47:37Bobby Lee?

  Can you do it organic, though, implants?

• 47:40Andrew Santino?

  You want to have sex with them? Yeah.

• 47:42Bobby Lee?

  I don't really, I don't feel comfortable with the squirties.

• 47:44Andrew Santino?

  I think it's a little bit of a problem. I'm not going to lie.

• 47:45Bobby Lee?

  Why?

• 47:46Andrew Santino?

  I don't think they do that.

• 47:47Bobby Lee?

  Oh, they don't do that?

• 47:48Andrew Santino?

  You're going to pay them a lot more, I would, I would imagine.

• 47:50Bobby Lee?

  Extra 25?

• 47:51Andrew Santino?

  I think it's more than that.

• 47:52Bobby Lee?

  50 grand?

• 47:53Andrew Santino?

  I'd, I'd, I'd say maybe more.

• 47:55Bobby Lee?

  Okay, well, then no.

• 47:56Andrew Santino?

  Okay, well, or be like Carlos. Get a call girl. Get a call girl.

• 48:00Bobby Lee?

  No, no, no. But no, no, no, no, no. Generational trauma.

• 48:04Andrew Santino?

  Hmm, well?

• 48:05Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, because that's what I have from my parents' war.

• 48:08Andrew Santino?

  Right, then you'll match up with someone well.

• 48:10Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 48:10Andrew Santino?

  You raise a kid solo. Or you could take someone's kid. Steal Whitney's kid.

• 48:14Bobby Lee?

  Oh, yeah.

• 48:16Andrew Santino?

  Free kid?

• 48:17Bobby Lee?

  Who else has kids I can steal?

• 48:19Andrew Santino?

  Who's got a lot of kids? Is there a comic with a lot of kids?

• 48:21Bobby Lee?

  George Kimmel.

• 48:23Andrew Santino?

  You don't want those kids, those are-

• 48:24Bobby Lee?

  The boy doesn't like me, but maybe the-

• 48:26Andrew Santino?

  White walkers.

• 48:27Speaker 05

  They're already havation, so.

• 48:29Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 48:31Bobby Lee?

  Can Carlos be my surrogate?

• 48:33Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, kind of. Can you carry? Oh, should I transition and get a uterus?

• 48:39Bobby Lee?

  Can you implant an uterus in somebody and have a baby with them?

• 48:42Andrew Santino?

  You can.

• 48:42Bobby Lee?

  Can you really?

• 48:43Andrew Santino?

  I don't think so.

• 48:44Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 48:44Andrew Santino?

  Can you? Can't men have babies now? They're allowed to legally here.

• 48:48Speaker 05

  I know how it works.

• 48:49Andrew Santino?

  Not in any of the states that I respect. Look, trans- Both biological trans men are capable of becoming pregnant. Yeah, because you can implant a uterus?

• 48:56Speaker 05

  No, those are women.

• 48:57Andrew Santino?

  No, no, no, that's bi- that's trans men, meaning, yeah, they have a uterus already. You can't implant the fucking uterus and-

• 49:02Speaker 05

  Right.

• 49:02Bobby Lee?

  Oh, okay.

• 49:03Andrew Santino?

  Cut it out. Bobby's Dream Come True. Bobby's Dream Come True is just like a uterus in a fucking vacuum, in like a tube.

• 49:08Bobby Lee?

  Well, in Xbox.

• 49:09Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 49:10Bobby Lee?

  Put a uterus in the back of a fuck Xbox.

• 49:11Andrew Santino?

  God, this guy blowing a schnoz.

• 49:13Bobby Lee?

  What's going on, dude?

• 49:14Andrew Santino?

  Our producer, no joke, is sick literally twice a month. I bet I will say-

• 49:18Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 49:19Andrew Santino?

  Very, very happy. Very happy.

• 49:24Bobby Lee?

  With what?

• 49:25Andrew Santino?

  That the weather's getting nice. Cause I was traveling around, I come back to the land, I go, ooh. That feels good.

• 49:32Bobby Lee?

  Feels so good.

• 49:33Andrew Santino?

  Sunshine.

• 49:34Bobby Lee?

  Dallas felt good.

• 49:35Andrew Santino?

  Dallas feels good.

• 49:36Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, right.

• 49:37Andrew Santino?

  Should we move to Dallas?

• 49:38Bobby Lee?

  I know, I love the town.

• 49:39Andrew Santino?

  I love Dallas.

• 49:40Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 49:41Andrew Santino?

  Let's go. You know I just can't move to Austin?

• 49:43Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I can't move to Austin.

• 49:44Andrew Santino?

  No business.

• 49:45Bobby Lee?

  Give me a reason why.

• 49:46Andrew Santino?

  Dallas?

• 49:47Bobby Lee?

  Austin.

• 49:48Andrew Santino?

  Why I can't move there?

• 49:49Bobby Lee?

  Yes.

• 49:51Andrew Santino?

  Why can't I move there?

• 49:52Bobby Lee?

  I keep telling you Vegas.

• 49:55Andrew Santino?

  Brother, you don't want to live in Vegas. You don't. I mean, I like Vegas a lot, but I like to visit.

• 50:00Bobby Lee?

  I think guests would go there.

• 50:01Andrew Santino?

  You don't think it's hard?

• 50:03Bobby Lee?

  Hard life?

• 50:03Andrew Santino?

  You don't think you would have a tough time in Vegas?

• 50:05Bobby Lee?

  No, there's probably good AA out there.

• 50:07Andrew Santino?

  I know, dude, but there's a lot of, a lot of everything out there.

• 50:09Bobby Lee?

  I know.

• 50:10Andrew Santino?

  There's everything you've ever wanted there.

• 50:12Speaker 05

  It's addiction city.

• 50:14Bobby Lee?

  It's addiction city. Says the kid. It's addiction city. Like, the kid from Minnesota's doing nothing. It's, do the one. It's addiction city. Yeah. And it's addiction city. What a fucking asshole you are. I mean, you texted me the other day, I didn't text you back.

• 50:35Speaker 04

  No, you didn't.

• 50:36Bobby Lee?

  Because of the addiction city stuff, dude.

• 50:38Andrew Santino?

  It's that kind of stuff that gets you no text back.

• 50:39Bobby Lee?

  It's that energy. And then you looked at me earlier, like, hey dad. Yeah, and I didn't really give you anything, did I?

• 50:47Speaker 04

  No.

• 50:48Bobby Lee?

  I will after this. Yeah, I will after this.

• 50:51Andrew Santino?

  I want to ask you a real question.

• 50:52Bobby Lee?

  Oh my god.

• 50:54Andrew Santino?

  You've been on the road, you've been working.

• 50:56Bobby Lee?

  I'm so busy.

• 50:56Andrew Santino?

  How close are you to doing your hour?

• 50:58Bobby Lee?

  No, not even close.

• 50:59Andrew Santino?

  Come on.

• 51:00Bobby Lee?

  Literally not close. I just extended the timeline. Now it's January.

• 51:05Andrew Santino?

  You're gonna shoot in January?

• 51:06Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 51:07Andrew Santino?

  Oh my god.

• 51:08Bobby Lee?

  What?

• 51:08Andrew Santino?

  2026.

• 51:09Bobby Lee?

  No, 28. No, 26, 26.

• 51:12Andrew Santino?

  And you'll put it out the end of 2026?

• 51:13Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, they, they go, this is the final last. I go, I'll take that!

• 51:19Andrew Santino?

  But wait a minute. You're gonna shoot it in January. You've got eight months now to prep.

• 51:24Bobby Lee?

  I've got, like, my clothes are down.

• 51:26Andrew Santino?

  Really?

• 51:27Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I have a whole fun closer.

• 51:29Andrew Santino?

  That's good.

• 51:29Bobby Lee?

  That's crazy. I mean, I just need about 20, 25 minutes. I'm getting there. We'll get there.

• 51:34Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, this hilarious thing that you do.

• 51:36Speaker 04

  Yeah, I just didn't see Bobby on the, uh, bus ad, so I was concerned.

• 51:40Andrew Santino?

  Well, because the ads are only for 2025.

• 51:42Speaker 04

  That's what I figured.

• 51:43Bobby Lee?

  Dude, what are you trying to do, dude?

• 51:45Speaker 04

  I was worried that something happened with the deal.

• 51:46Bobby Lee?

  Nothing happened, the deal is going.

• 51:49Speaker 04

  Okay, well, I didn't see your, you weren't being publicized.

• 51:51Bobby Lee?

  Is Sebastian publicized?

• 51:53Speaker 04

  They don't really need to.

• 51:55Bobby Lee?

  No. Because he's in my chunk.

• 51:57Andrew Santino?

  Wow.

• 51:58Bobby Lee?

  He's in my chunk.

• 51:59Speaker 04

  You're in his chunk.

• 52:00Bobby Lee?

  Okay, I'm so, I'm, okay, okay, okay, can I say something to you asshole?

• 52:04Speaker 04

  Me?

• 52:05Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, asshole. I will tell you this.

• 52:06Speaker 04

  They call me that.

• 52:07Bobby Lee?

  Last night, Tim Dillon and Marcelo Hernandez.

• 52:11Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, he's funny.

• 52:12Bobby Lee?

  Tim goes, "Ay, you wanna go rapper's party?" I go, "What's a rapper's party?" I know a rapper, so they take me to this gigantic, in this, on Will's shirt, this gigantic building. The rapper lands with a helicopter.

• 52:25Andrew Santino?

  Who's the rapper?

• 52:26Bobby Lee?

  I don't know.

• 52:27Andrew Santino?

  Love that.

• 52:27Bobby Lee?

  I have no idea who it is, right? But, you know, who got recognized the most?

• 52:33Andrew Santino?

  You did more than Dillon and Marcelo.

• 52:35Bobby Lee?

  Ask him.

• 52:35Speaker 04

  From YouTube.

• 52:36Andrew Santino?

  Wow. I gotta know the rapper's party.

• 52:39Bobby Lee?

  Who are you calling?

• 52:40Andrew Santino?

  Dylan.

• 52:40Bobby Lee?

  I just lied.

• 52:46Bobby Lee?

  I just lied, man.

• 52:47Andrew Santino?

  Dude, what's going on?

• 52:48Bobby Lee?

  What are you trying to...

• 52:50Bobby Lee?

  I just lied?

• 52:50Andrew Santino?

  I wanna know the rapper.

• 52:52Bobby Lee?

  No, but I got mad at it, you know what I mean? I got defensive, so I lie when I get defensive.

• 52:55Andrew Santino?

  Well, make up a better lie.

• 52:56Bobby Lee?

  Alright, yeah, so, you know, I'll tell you, what was it?

• 52:59Andrew Santino?

  You're naming people we know. You could've said Bon Joon-ho and I did crack last night. I don't know how to contact Bon Joon-ho.

• 53:04Bobby Lee?

  Okay, alright, but what am I mad about? I even forgot that.

• 53:06Andrew Santino?

  You're mad at Carlos for trying to get at you.

• 53:08Speaker 05

  Is the Bon Joon-ho real?

• 53:10Bobby Lee?

  No.

• 53:12Andrew Santino?

  You're not seeing him either?

• 53:13Bobby Lee?

  No, how am I gonna see him?

• 53:15Andrew Santino?

  What are you doing?

• 53:18Bobby Lee?

  What do you mean? I don't know what to say today, I'm just lying.

• 53:21Andrew Santino?

  Alright, dude.

• 53:22Bobby Lee?

  Can I say something?

• 53:23Andrew Santino?

  I respect it.

• 53:24Bobby Lee?

  The kid didn't go to the meeting?

• 53:27Andrew Santino?

  The staff work kid?

• 53:29Bobby Lee?

  Do you believe that, those big stab wounds in the neck?

• 53:32Speaker 05

  You're a great actor sometimes.

• 53:33Bobby Lee?

  Thank you so much, dude.

• 53:34Andrew Santino?

  Oh my god.

• 53:35Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, all of it's lies.

• 53:36Andrew Santino?

  Backhanded compliments.

• 53:37Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 53:37Andrew Santino?

  You're a great actor sometimes.

• 53:38Bobby Lee?

  Alright, but, um, here's the trick, though. All of it did happen.

• 53:42Andrew Santino?

  I know it did.

• 53:43Bobby Lee?

  So, there you go, in your face.

• 53:45Andrew Santino?

  I know it did.

• 53:46Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I'm a mind-tricker. I know. Yeah, yeah.

• 53:49Andrew Santino?

  Tricker.

• 53:51Bobby Lee?

  I'm a mind-tricker!

• 53:52Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, you gotta be careful.

• 53:53Bobby Lee?

  Okay, sorry, my bad.

• 53:54Andrew Santino?

  Mind-tricker?

• 53:56Bobby Lee?

  What's up, man?

• 53:56Andrew Santino?

  What's up, mind-tricker?

• 53:59Andrew Santino?

  What's up, mind-tricker?

• 54:01Bobby Lee?

  This is my neighborhood, Tricker.

• 54:04Bobby Lee?

  Alright?

• 54:04Andrew Santino?

  Went and saw my family on St. Patrick's Day, it was fantastic.

• 54:07Bobby Lee?

  Tell us more.

• 54:08Andrew Santino?

  And I went out to a little pub. Nice little pub, we went to an old pub in my neighborhood that I grew up in. I posted a picture about it, the first apartment I ever had. Theo responded to it and goes... First of all, the first three floors is a garage, it's a parking garage. He goes, "Damn, dude, no windows?"

• 54:26Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, buddy.

• 54:26Bobby Lee?

  Wow.

• 54:26Andrew Santino?

  I love him.

• 54:27Bobby Lee?

  Wow.

• 54:28Andrew Santino?

  It's his birthday today.

• 54:29Bobby Lee?

  Happy birthday.

• 54:30Andrew Santino?

  To Theo.

• 54:31Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 54:31Andrew Santino?

  And then I trolled around Chicago with my family, it was very meaningful. It was very wonderful to see my family.

• 54:37Bobby Lee?

  I love your family, dude. I really do.

• 54:39Andrew Santino?

  I miss him, I wish I could see him more, I don't know how we can do that.

• 54:42Bobby Lee?

  I really do love him.

• 54:43Andrew Santino?

  Especially if we move to Vegas.

• 54:45Bobby Lee?

  Is your sister still out there?

• 54:47Andrew Santino?

  She's out there.

• 54:48Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 54:49Andrew Santino?

  No.

• 54:50Bobby Lee?

  Oh, she live in?

• 54:50Andrew Santino?

  She's in love.

• 54:51Bobby Lee?

  Oh, yeah, that's right.

• 54:52Andrew Santino?

  She's in love in Chicago.

• 54:53Bobby Lee?

  I like that guy.

• 54:54Andrew Santino?

  He's a great guy. He's a great guy. Love in Chicago.

• 54:58Bobby Lee?

  You know, I love Chicago because the professor, the pizza professor guy.

• 55:01Andrew Santino?

  Oh, yeah, we had him at the Dr. Phil show.

• 55:03Bobby Lee?

  Love him.

• 55:03Andrew Santino?

  The Dr. Phil show, I gotta be honest with you. The surprise guest was mind blowing.

• 55:08Bobby Lee?

  Who was it?

• 55:09Andrew Santino?

  Chevy Chase.

• 55:10Bobby Lee?

  No.

• 55:11Andrew Santino?

  It's my hand to God.

• 55:13Bobby Lee?

  Chevy Chase went up on stage?

• 55:14Andrew Santino?

  Yeah. It was pretty incredible.

• 55:16Bobby Lee?

  And did he do bits?

• 55:17Andrew Santino?

  Him and, him and, uh, Dr. Phil, they talked for a little bit. They did a couple of bits together, but Chevy wasn't gonna stay around for a while. I think they made it very clear he was gonna hang out. But they played a beautiful video beforehand of like some of Chevy's greatest bits from different movies.

• 55:30Bobby Lee?

  Wow, wow, wow, wow.

• 55:31Andrew Santino?

  It was pretty emotional.

• 55:31Bobby Lee?

  He's a legend.

• 55:32Andrew Santino?

  His family was there. They all were like, like loving it.

• 55:34Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 55:35Andrew Santino?

  And then he walked out there, did a couple of bits with, uh, Dr. Phil and then took off. It was tough to follow.

• 55:40Bobby Lee?

  My-

• 55:40Andrew Santino?

  Not gonna lie, very happy I wasn't on right after.

• 55:43Bobby Lee?

  Oh, who was, who was on?

• 55:44Andrew Santino?

  It was Norman.

• 55:45Bobby Lee?

  Mark.

• 55:46Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, which he killed, but I'm also was like, I don't wanna go after Chevy. I don't wanna go after fucking a legend. But Norman went out there. He crushed. I mean, he-

• 55:53Bobby Lee?

  I did mine in Dallas with, uh, Jamie Kennedy.

• 55:55Andrew Santino?

  Same kinda level of fame. Chevy Chase?

• 55:59Bobby Lee?

  It was fun.

• 55:59Andrew Santino?

  Jamie's my dog.

• 56:00Bobby Lee?

  No, I'll be honest with you. I was dreading it, but I really did have fun.

• 56:03Andrew Santino?

  You were dreading because it's nerve wracking to do live shows. Like that.

• 56:07Bobby Lee?

  Well, I think the money is what-

• 56:11Bobby Lee?

  I mean, cause I had, looking at my, from my point of view.

• 56:14Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 56:15Bobby Lee?

  I went from the movie early to Dallas.

• 56:18Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 56:19Bobby Lee?

  So I had to wait three days in Dallas to do that show.

• 56:22Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, you were hanging out.

• 56:23Bobby Lee?

  So you have to understand that there's like some resentment building.

• 56:25Andrew Santino?

  You're right.

• 56:26Bobby Lee?

  Like, what am I doing here, man? What the fuck?

• 56:28Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 56:29Bobby Lee?

  For how much? You know what I mean? And I was just repeating that.

• 56:31Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 56:32Bobby Lee?

  But then we'll go to a meeting. I think it would calm down.

• 56:33Andrew Santino?

  You went to a meeting to calm down?

• 56:34Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. And I was meant to go probably to meet that kid.

• 56:37Andrew Santino?

  You definitely were.

• 56:38Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 56:38Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, you were. Yeah, Norman was great. We had some lunch beforehand.

• 56:42Bobby Lee?

  Mm-hmm.

• 56:42Andrew Santino?

  And, uh, he was like, yeah, they piggyback some shows. Did a couple of shows at the Den. Great venue.

• 56:48Bobby Lee?

  I have to say though, um, this Monday night meeting I go to, I can't say who it is, but he's a gigantic, gigantic, gigantic musician. So I go to the-

• 56:58Andrew Santino?

  Hold on.

• 56:58Bobby Lee?

  Did I ever tell you about my Monday nights that I go to?

• 57:01Andrew Santino?

  You told me, yeah.

• 57:02Speaker 04

  Celebrity one, right?

• 57:02Bobby Lee?

  It's not a celebrity one.

• 57:04Speaker 04

  Wait, men's?

• 57:05Bobby Lee?

  It's a men's room meeting, but it's old rock legend.

• 57:09Andrew Santino?

  Steven Tyler.

• 57:10Bobby Lee?

  No, he's not a-

• 57:11Andrew Santino?

  Actual rock-

• 57:12Bobby Lee?

  Oh no, we're not doing this!

• 57:13Speaker 04

  Oh, I know. Slash.

• 57:14Bobby Lee?

  What?

• 57:15Andrew Santino?

  Slash.

• 57:15Bobby Lee?

  No, no, it's not, no, it's not-

• 57:17Andrew Santino?

  Phil Lesh.

• 57:17Bobby Lee?

  It's the anonymity part, I can't say this part anyway.

• 57:20Andrew Santino?

  Oates.

• 57:21Bobby Lee?

  Okay?

• 57:22Andrew Santino?

  Oates.

• 57:23Bobby Lee?

  Yes, and Garfunkel. Oates Garfunkel, the other guy from Wham!

• 57:26Andrew Santino?

  Hall.

• 57:27Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, um-

• 57:30Bobby Lee?

  But he's, he's literally like, one of the greatest, right? I've been going to this meeting for 20 years.

• 57:35Andrew Santino?

  Paul McCartney.

• 57:36Speaker 04

  Elvis?

• 57:36Bobby Lee?

  And I tried to look at him, and I, and I wore his t-shirt the other day.

• 57:42Andrew Santino?

  So dumb.

• 57:43Bobby Lee?

  I did.

• 57:44Andrew Santino?

  You wore the shirt of the band-

• 57:45Bobby Lee?

  Cause I want him to even look at me!

• 57:46Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 57:47Bobby Lee?

  Right, so I had the shirt, and I was doing this, sitting like this, and he just would, he, he's literally directing my eye line. He won't look over.

• 57:54Andrew Santino?

  Well, yeah, cause he knows you're peacocking.

• 57:56Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, and then, you know, I made up the story when I shared, and got everyone all emotional.

• 58:01Andrew Santino?

  Was it going to a rapper's house?

• 58:02Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, still nothing, but anyway, um, I don't know why I said that.

• 58:09Andrew Santino?

  But what happened in the Monday night meeting that was important?

• 58:12Bobby Lee?

  Nothing. I don't get what I'm saying.

• 58:15Andrew Santino?

  Is there food at the Monday night meetings?

• 58:18Bobby Lee?

  No, coffee and water.

• 58:19Andrew Santino?

  Have you ever thought about bringing food for people?

• 58:21Bobby Lee?

  What are you gonna give? No.

• 58:23Andrew Santino?

  Would that be a move?

• 58:23Bobby Lee?

  No.

• 58:24Andrew Santino?

  That's not a move.

• 58:25Bobby Lee?

  I mean, I can bring cookies.

• 58:27Andrew Santino?

  Do you bring anything ever?

• 58:28Bobby Lee?

  No, no one brings anything.

• 58:29Speaker 04

  You can make it your own commitment, though, if you wanna give more.

• 58:32Bobby Lee?

  I'll go, hey, um-

• 58:33Andrew Santino?

  You could be like, I'll bring my cookies.

• 58:35Bobby Lee?

  So I shared, so I shared the, um, I shared that meet, that story, Dallas and the Kid, in Iran.

• 58:41Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 58:41Bobby Lee?

  And it got everyone teared up in the room.

• 58:43Andrew Santino?

  Of course, it's beautiful. What is this? Oh, by the way, after all the hate I get, Apple co-founder Steve Wozniak prints his own custom $2 bills and spends them. Thank God, thank God the internet is backing me up. All the people that make fun of me online, all the times people mock me, the Wozzy Wozzy prints $2 bills, Bobby, in your face, it's real.

• 59:01Bobby Lee?

  Wow.

• 59:02Andrew Santino?

  And he spends them! There's the Woz dog right there!

• 59:04Bobby Lee?

  Wow.

• 59:07Bobby Lee?

  I don't remember.

• 59:07Speaker 09

  It's the effects of the US government. So by law, these are legal.

• 59:10Andrew Santino?

  By law, they're legal tender?

• 59:12Speaker 09

  I have been spending them. You can get arrested for them. You cannot get convicted because you're in the right. He's printing his own two dollar bills. And spending them. I sell sheets of four two dollar bills for five dollars. And of course, I tell you, what you're getting is worth fifty dollars worth. You'd be an idiot not to buy it for five bucks. I sell them all over the place. And the Secret Service, the Secret Service proved these three times.

• 59:36Andrew Santino?

  The nerve, the nerve of this guy, by the way. Printing money. He's one of the richest men in the world and he's print, literally doing, he's spitting in the face of poor people. I'm printing money. I'm, the phrase, I'm literally printing money. By the way, something is happening, by the way, there's a revolution coming.

• 59:51Bobby Lee?

  I feel it.

• 59:52Andrew Santino?

  No, no, I'm dead serious. I'm not even kidding at all.

• 59:54Bobby Lee?

  Oh my God, are you ready? I have seeds?

• 59:55Andrew Santino?

  Something's happening.

• 59:56Bobby Lee?

  I have seeds and bottles of water.

• 59:58Andrew Santino?

  I feel that something's coming. Their big, big dog CEOs, big, big presidents are going to get in trouble. People are going to start taking people out. The doomsday clock has eighty-nine seconds to midnight. We're so close, the world is about to collapse. I had, I was in the desert, I met a guy. He was a sweet guy. He said he worked for some company, not gonna say. And he goes, yeah, these other people at my company keep pushing me to get security. They're afraid for my life. I said, why don't you do it?

• 1:00:31Bobby Lee?

  Let's get trailers. Let's get trailer, I'm being real.

• 1:00:35Andrew Santino?

  No one's gonna kill podcasters.

• 1:00:38Bobby Lee?

  Oh, we're not involved?

• 1:00:39Andrew Santino?

  What?

• 1:00:40Bobby Lee?

  I wanna be involved.

• 1:00:41Andrew Santino?

  You're wrong, you're not.

• 1:00:42Bobby Lee?

  I wanna get a stick.

• 1:00:44Andrew Santino?

  You can get a stick, buddy.

• 1:00:45Bobby Lee?

  Okay, okay.

• 1:00:45Andrew Santino?

  Give him the stick with the pinata.

• 1:00:47Bobby Lee?

  All right. No, but really, when you mean revolution, what do you mean?

• 1:00:51Andrew Santino?

  I think there's gonna be an uprising. I think there's gonna be an uprising, and I mean this. There's going to be an uprising of the lower and middle class.

• 1:01:00Bobby Lee?

  Hmm.

• 1:01:01Andrew Santino?

  And they are going to go after the top tier.

• 1:01:04Bobby Lee?

  Hmm.

• 1:01:04Andrew Santino?

  The guys who own Amazon, who own. Microsoft, the guys who control all of these big monolithic corporations. I think it's, I think it's gonna happen.

• 1:01:13Bobby Lee?

  But if you see.

• 1:01:14Andrew Santino?

  I think it's gonna happen.

• 1:01:15Bobby Lee?

  These town halls now, right? You can see the anger and you're seeing people that normally, normally wouldn't protest.

• 1:01:22Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:23Bobby Lee?

  And say things just screaming and, and, and interrupting and you know what I mean? They're, they're, they're in rage mode.

• 1:01:30Andrew Santino?

  People are, people are gonna fight back. It's gonna happen. So get ready, cause it's coming. I thought about.

• 1:01:35Bobby Lee?

  But let's get a trailer.

• 1:01:36Andrew Santino?

  No, no, we're fine.

• 1:01:37Bobby Lee?

  Okay, we gotta get seeds.

• 1:01:38Andrew Santino?

  We'll get the seeds.

• 1:01:39Bobby Lee?

  Okay. I've always wanted seeds and I wanted to watch them grow.

• 1:01:43Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, we'll, we'll get some seeds. You could do that.

• 1:01:45Bobby Lee?

  Can you do it? Can we, can we get seeds though?

• 1:01:47Andrew Santino?

  Oh my God, Arowan sells seeds. Great.

• 1:01:49Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:50Andrew Santino?

  We'll buy them from Arowan.

• 1:01:51Bobby Lee?

  No, but we gotta get seeds that, um, I see them on TikTok a lot.

• 1:01:56Andrew Santino?

  You see TikTok seeds?

• 1:02:00Andrew Santino?

  What are?

• 1:02:00Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, like a variety, like a variety pack.

• 1:02:02Andrew Santino?

  Yep. All I see on TikTok now is people telling me that you're fat and you're lazy and you need to get up and make money. That's what all TikTok is all like.

• 1:02:11Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:11Andrew Santino?

  You wanna optimize your day? You think your day starts?

• 1:02:15Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:15Andrew Santino?

  When you wake up? By the time you wake up, I've done six jobs.

• 1:02:18Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:19Andrew Santino?

  I've had six jobs. I, I, I impregnated four women. And I tripled my bank account.

• 1:02:23Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:24Andrew Santino?

  While you're sleeping. That's what I see on Instagram. TikTok now is getting boring.

• 1:02:28Bobby Lee?

  You're, two months ago, I fucking searched animals with Down syndrome.

• 1:02:33Andrew Santino?

  Hmm.

• 1:02:33Bobby Lee?

  And now I just keep getting like every other one is like koala work, you know what I mean? It's crazy.

• 1:02:38Andrew Santino?

  Oh my God, that's an.

• 1:02:40Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:42Bobby Lee?

  I, I do it. And they're cuter when they have it.

• 1:02:45Andrew Santino?

  Well, the, the koala is.

• 1:02:47Bobby Lee?

  Look at the koala with his little fat tongue sticking out.

• 1:02:50Andrew Santino?

  I didn't know that they got Down syndrome.

• 1:02:52Bobby Lee?

  I think they all do. Yeah. Anyway, seeds. Let's go back to seeds.

• 1:02:56Andrew Santino?

  Dude, that's me. There I am. That's my kid.

• 1:02:58Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:03:01Andrew Santino?

  You want seeds.

• 1:03:03Bobby Lee?

  I think there's gonna be come to a time when peak oil, right? When peak oil happens.

• 1:03:09Andrew Santino?

  Peak oil.

• 1:03:10Bobby Lee?

  You know, peak oil?

• 1:03:11Andrew Santino?

  When we run out of oil?

• 1:03:13Bobby Lee?

  No, it's not when we run out. We get to the top precipice of where oil, right? We can get it. And then the demand is gonna be too high, high, because the world is growing, population wise. And we have bigger like, um, we have empires, like India and China, right? And so when it, we can't have the demand, that's when things start breaking down.

• 1:03:35Andrew Santino?

  Hmm.

• 1:03:36Bobby Lee?

  Because fossil fuel isn't something that you can just make. It's just there.

• 1:03:40Andrew Santino?

  It's, well.

• 1:03:41Bobby Lee?

  And then once you're done with it all, it's not there anymore.

• 1:03:44Andrew Santino?

  We'll find something by then.

• 1:03:45Bobby Lee?

  Well, hopefully, but my point is that after peak oil and then all of a sudden, we can't get blueberries from Mexico or whatever.

• 1:03:51Andrew Santino?

  You don't need them.

• 1:03:52Bobby Lee?

  Okay, okay, then you can't get plantains from Brazil.

• 1:03:55Andrew Santino?

  But look at this, it suggests between 2028 and 2035. I will say, we will find a continuation of alternative solutions. When we're put in a corner, humans do great things. Have you seen, by the way, Japanese are using kinetic energy to now try to, um, power cities, entire cities. They have these things on the ground that you walk on, just regular sidewalks. And by stepping on it, right there, that's their triangles. They're, no, no, do the one that's triangles, down, that one.

• 1:04:22Bobby Lee?

  Wow.

• 1:04:22Andrew Santino?

  So these are, these are kinetic energy, uh, walkways and they're putting them all over Japan. When they walk, they capture the kinetic energy which turns into electricity, powering an entire city.

• 1:04:33Bobby Lee?

  Amazing.

• 1:04:34Andrew Santino?

  So the proposition is that this will be all over major cities, New York, Chicago, Miami, where there's a lot of foot traffic. And it will end up powering the city itself. Look dude, the smartest people in the world are continuing to work on great shit. I'm not saying.

• 1:04:47Bobby Lee?

  I just don't know. I mean, why don't we have it now then?

• 1:04:50Andrew Santino?

  Everything takes time.

• 1:04:51Bobby Lee?

  I know, but.

• 1:04:52Andrew Santino?

  They're making it for themselves though.

• 1:04:53Bobby Lee?

  But Jimmy Carter, back when he was president.

• 1:04:55Andrew Santino?

  Let's move to Japan.

• 1:04:56Bobby Lee?

  He was talking about peak oil back then.

• 1:04:58Andrew Santino?

  I know.

• 1:04:58Bobby Lee?

  This is a danger.

• 1:04:59Andrew Santino?

  I know, but look, it's not happened yet. We keep putting shit off. Look dude, we're all dead. I got so many microplastics.

• 1:05:07Bobby Lee?

  I know.

• 1:05:07Andrew Santino?

  I pissed a Lego yesterday.

• 1:05:08Bobby Lee?

  I know, I know, I know, I know.

• 1:05:10Andrew Santino?

  I mean, it's like, it's fucked. You know, whenever I go to eat sushi now, they're like, yeah, you get too much sushi. You're gonna blank, blank, blank. Well, fine. I like the sushi.

• 1:05:16Bobby Lee?

  Hmm.

• 1:05:16Andrew Santino?

  I like sushi. I'm gonna keep eating poisoned fish from the sea.

• 1:05:20Bobby Lee?

  Drinking this, you get a little microplastic.

• 1:05:22Andrew Santino?

  Right. Again, what are you, what am I supposed to do?

• 1:05:25Bobby Lee?

  Exactly.

• 1:05:26Andrew Santino?

  What are we supposed to do?

• 1:05:27Bobby Lee?

  Get a well.

• 1:05:27Andrew Santino?

  Get a well.

• 1:05:28Bobby Lee?

  Yes.

• 1:05:29Andrew Santino?

  Dig a well.

• 1:05:29Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:05:30Andrew Santino?

  And then there's piss and poop in the well somehow. You see the way people act in public? And I'm like, no shit, we're fucked.

• 1:05:36Speaker 02

  Like what?

• 1:05:38Andrew Santino?

  The way that we, okay, we were going, we were going to try to get a car, uh, to go to the airport and there was, um, traffic, like crazy traffic, cause they're, they're doing something to the expressway again in Chicago. And these people were waiting outside of the hotel to get autographs from, the, the hockey team was in town and the LA Kings were staying there.

• 1:05:56Bobby Lee?

  Hmm.

• 1:05:58Andrew Santino?

  And the way these men would like bump in front of each other and throw each other out of the way to get an autograph from another grown man. I'm like, oh, we're fucked.

• 1:06:06Bobby Lee?

  It's, we're fucked.

• 1:06:07Andrew Santino?

  Grown men?

• 1:06:08Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:06:09Andrew Santino?

  Like, I mean, literally fighting for airtime, space to have another man sign a piece of paper that most likely they wanna sell. They're not gonna keep it. And they're not making a living off of this. They're just, they just want the satisfaction. But they were like fighting. I was like, we're fucked. As a society, we're fucked.

• 1:06:26Bobby Lee?

  I've never asked for an autograph, have you?

• 1:06:29Andrew Santino?

  Absolutely. When I was a kid, when I was a child.

• 1:06:31Bobby Lee?

  I didn't know anybody.

• 1:06:33Andrew Santino?

  Well, you were, you were deprived of all.

• 1:06:34Bobby Lee?

  Maybe the local barber.

• 1:06:36Andrew Santino?

  Look at that. Your autographs are for sale online. There you go. That was someone you signed at the airport.

• 1:06:40Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, that is, that is my signature, yes.

• 1:06:41Andrew Santino?

  A hundred percent.

• 1:06:42Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. How much is it going for?

• 1:06:43Andrew Santino?

  Sixty-seven dollars.

• 1:06:48Andrew Santino?

  Oh, don't laugh. Mine's less. For sure. Andrew Santino, thirty dollars is mine. That's eighty-five. Look at Andrew Santino autograph, twenty-six dollars, max. I won't breach thirty. Fifty-nine, forty-two. I'm less, see? Forty-nine. One twenty-four, cause it's you and I together.

• 1:07:05Bobby Lee?

  Wow.

• 1:07:06Andrew Santino?

  Thirty dollars.

• 1:07:09Bobby Lee?

  Do people buy it?

• 1:07:10Andrew Santino?

  No. Somebody must. It exists.

• 1:07:14Bobby Lee?

  Oh, that's a, a fifty-dollar what? Just one of our tour posters?

• 1:07:17Andrew Santino?

  Uh huh.

• 1:07:17Bobby Lee?

  With all of us? Or just you and I?

• 1:07:20Andrew Santino?

  Just you and I.

• 1:07:20Bobby Lee?

  Wow.

• 1:07:22Andrew Santino?

  That's a little offensive.

• 1:07:23Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:07:24Speaker 02

  It's fifteen percent off.

• 1:07:28Andrew Santino?

  When did they decide to take it down?

• 1:07:31Speaker 02

  Well, it's been up for fifteen years.

• 1:07:36Andrew Santino?

  Nice.

• 1:07:37Bobby Lee?

  Dude, dude, dude.

• 1:07:39Andrew Santino?

  These kids going.

• 1:07:40Bobby Lee?

  No, can I just say something? That tone was insane. That was crazy, dude.

• 1:07:45Andrew Santino?

  It's an addict's paradise.

• 1:07:49Bobby Lee?

  That's what it was.

• 1:07:52Andrew Santino?

  Hey.

• 1:07:53Bobby Lee?

  Happy birthday, Andreas.

• 1:07:54Andrew Santino?

  Happy birthday, fancy. Thank you.

• 1:07:56Bobby Lee?

  You say it.

• 1:07:56Andrew Santino?

  You say it. Thank you for being a bad friend.

• 1:08:23Speaker 10

  Coca-Cola. For the big, for the small, the short, and the tall. Peacemakers, risk takers. For the optimists, pessimists. For long-distance love. For introverts and extroverts. The thinkers and the doers. For old friends and new. Coca-Cola, for everyone. Pick up some Coca-Cola at a store near you.