Giggly Squad
Hosted by Hannah Berner and Paige DeSorbo
Stream Hannah's special NONE OF MY BUSINESS on Hulu now!!!
11,963 words · 3 speakers
Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.
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Sup, Gigglers?
Gary, fix your wifi. Manifest that shit. We can't be managed.
I mean, the day just got away from me.
Hello, my Hulu gigglers.
Yes, congrats.
Today's the day.
Happy Hulu day for everyone that celebrates.
I was ready to go to bed at like 10pm last night and I said, what if I just
Stayed up.
scrolled my phone a little bit and then it was midnight and then I got all excited. And then Paige was like, we're recording to 8am and I was like, but I'm literally partying. And by partying, I mean, I was sitting on the toilet scrolling my Instagram to see if the gigglers were watching it yet.
Did you watch it? Like, did you turn it on?
Where I'm staying right now doesn't have Hulu.
What does that even mean? In the year 2026, what does that mean? You're staying somewhere with no wifi?
Our TV's weirdly connected to something that doesn't allow Hulu on it. So I watched it on my phone. And once I watched it, I watched the beginning just to make sure that like all the audio was like synced to my voice, to my mouth. And then I was like, we're good.
Wait, that is so, first of all, I feel like that's not true. And this is like a Bluetooth situation, 100% that TV can get Hulu. There's actually no doubt in my mind that that TV is capable of airing Hulu. I actually like, for a second, I was like, oh yeah, maybe. And then I remembered who I'm talking to, that TV has Hulu, 100%.
No, I'm so scared of TVs. Like, why are they so fucking complicated? TVs and turning on showers, it's 2026, let's get it, let's find a simple way.
Is Dez, like if you're, if you're home and you're like, oh, I'm trying to think of something that's like a good example of something that's broken, that's not the TV, like. Anything like the wifi or yeah, like the TV, the computer, anything. Is he able to fix, is he fixing it? First, are you going to him for him to fix it?
You're like, I have so many questions.
On who's in charge over there? How are you guys watching TV?
At the end of the day, he is a boomer, however.
Right, that's what I'm saying.
Boomers are good at TVs. Honestly, like, we're in an equal partnership.
Yeah, you really are. Do you want to know who's not?
Who's not?
I'm not in an equal partnership whatsoever. Because somehow I've become the IT. And I go, there's a problem here. And I think actually you, there's something wrong with you. If I'm the IT person in the house, we're going down. Ship is going down.
Yeah, because you just do manual labor. Like, you want to just take out your toolkit. You don't want to be like figuring out electricity.
The other day I said, where should I put my bolt cutters?
Because I had them in a random closet. And he goes, I go, this is how I know I, I love you. He goes, I think you should put them next to my bed, just in case. And I go, phenomenal idea. But you never know.
And this is why all the lesbian gigglers on Pride are excited for you to come out one day. Because she walks around with her toolkit and her tool belt, just trying to fix stuff around the house. Um, I'm not saying anything, but I'm, I'm not saying anything.
Yeah, I've been known to level a thing or two. Anyway. Okay, back to Hulu. So exciting. I downloaded for the plane, so I didn't, I wanted to watch fresh. And also I wanted to watch somewhat in public.
Oh, interesting. You want to make a statement?
Well, because if I'm on a plane and I see someone's iPad, you know I'm nosy. I'm like, what are they watching? What are they into?
Wait, so you're literally gonna watch it, holding it up on the plane?
Is anyone getting the wifi? Are you actually connected?
Make sure you put the closed captions on so people get the punchlines. Wait, that's so, but also I feel like then you have to watch it on TV.
Yeah.
For like the full experience.
Okay, you watched it on your phone and you're gonna comment me for watching it?
No, I'm not watching it. I'm not watching it. I've watched it.
When I tell you guys, I've watched every second a bazillion times and like I, I need to let myself go. And also, you can't make edits.
Right.
God forbid I see something that, an angle that I don't want.
I'm so excited for the gigglers to see the part where, really the whole thing, to just see your hair.
To see the part where it's your, your hair is on your head.
I like that part.
It just looks so good.
I've been holding in my jokes for a year. Like, I've been like working on all these jokes that because I knew the special was coming out, I couldn't talk about them on Giggly Squad. I couldn't do them.
You would bring up a topic that I was like doing on stage and I, and I'd be like, I have a joke, I can't like, I can't say that right now. Like, I was really being held back. Um, I was, um...
Creatively, emotionally, you've been being held back and today you've burst.
I've burst my bubble and, um, I'm, yeah, I'm just, I'm really excited. I have no words. Also, it's fucking 8 a.m. Why are we recording at 8 a.m.?
You know, it's funny because right when we got on the Zoom, I looked at you and Grace and I was like, the things I do to them where like I get off on it because I did a hair mask last night. So I've been itching to wake up and wash it out. So like at 7 a.m. I'm like, I'm washing my hair mask out. I got microneedling yesterday. Oh, little tip for the girls.
You're so awake right now.
I know, I don't know what's going on. Little, I've like turned into a morning person.
This happens in your mid-30s, girl.
Yeah, and if you go undiagnosed anxiety for this long, you can
Oh, you just become a morning person. Yeah, got it.
Oh, my microneedling. Oh, I actually have a couple of things to say and I didn't want to say it because I wanted you to talk about your Hulu stuff, but it's bursting out of me, so.
Yeah, no, y- y- you're like, you've, we've, Hulu's out, okay, let's go. My pores are not looking how I want them to.
I'm obsessed with microneedling. You know that. I just did my second session.
Yeah, you FaceTimed me yesterday and your face was fully numb and I had to have a serious conversation with you while you just were like.
My girlfriend told me to take a Clar- take Claritin, like the day before, the day of, the day after. She said it helps with like breakouts afterward.
Who's your girlfriend? TikTok?
No, my friend Alexa.
Was it a doctor?
No, but in my world, might as well.
No, Alexa knows things.
Alexa knows things and if it's that, it, that, it's, she knows things. So, that's the first thing. The second thing.
Wait, why, why Claritin?
I, something with like the histamine, because you do break out after anything. Here's how someone described it to me. When you get microneedling, anything that was gonna come out of your pore in like two months is gonna come out right now. Because it's like puncturing your skin to like remove it to repair. So if you have like a pimple underneath that like eventually is gonna come out and you go get microneedling, it's probably gonna come out like immediately. So you do purge a little. I love that.
Purging.
If someone brings up purging, my head is whipping. And like, tell me about your journey.
You wanna see effects.
I wanna see it.
But why do I feel like the more effects, I feel like the, I guess the better the treatment, the more bad stuff happens?
Well, it's like your skin has to get bad before it gets better. It has to like break down before it can repair.
Or is that the patriarchy?
No, that's science.
Okay.
It has to like.
First time you've mentioned science on this pod ever.
So, then I'm laying there yesterday, they're numbing my face. They, you lay there for like forty.
You love getting numbs. You lo- like, you.
Anything involving numbing pages, like, please, and also get my, like-
Grain while you're at-
My frontal lobe, please.
So I'm laying there, I'm numbing. She's like, "Do you want me to turn the lights off while you numb?" I'm like, "Totally." So she turns the lights off, I'm like, "Meditating," I'm sitting there, I'm having a great time. I open my eyes and I'm like, "You know what? Sometimes you have to be hypocritical, and sometimes you have to change your mind, and sometimes you say something, and then something happens, and it's different." And so I did make a Botox appointment.
So obsessed with you, but also obsessed with you. You guys, we're watching her journey, her honest journey.
So we're watching an honest journey of a woman in her 30s.
Sorry, healing isn't linear.
That's what it, healing's not linear. So I'm taking a step back.
Healing's not linear, that's what we, you guys, when anyone asks you anything, just say, "Healing's not linear." Okay, period, flame.
It's not linear. And so we made an appointment for two weeks.
What made you do this? Cause the gigglers have whiplash, they're literally in their car, they just went-
Do you wanna know what it, what made me do it? And I'm gonna call her out right now, it's Taylor Fitzgerald. I said, "I'm not gonna get Botox till I think, like, the fall, maybe I'll come and I'll do it."
This is her makeup artist, by the way, who we love, who's really good at cooking.
I'll get it in my forehead. And she looked at me and she goes, "But what about a smooth forehead when you're in Italy?" And I looked at her and I go, "Why would you say that to me? Why would you say that?"
Well, this is the thing, she knows you're already anxious about Italy. I texted you a couple days ago, I just threw it out there, I said, "How are the outfits going for Italy?" Cause-
I haven't started.
And you said something to the effect of horrible, something a little too dark for the question. Um, so I know you're stressing and she took advantage of your insecurities in that moment.
Also, she's look, she looks at my face arguably the most of anyone I know. So she sings, I, I was like, "Okay, I will." So, I'm really excited for that. And then my third, and then my third-
But you're not, wait, you're not going below your eyes.
I'm just doing my forehead. Cause I did love how my forehead and eyes looked, so I'm just doing my forehead.
Okay, because we can't do a lisp on the pod again, it really was affecting downloads.
The only thing I need you to do is like use your lips to pronounce.
It was really crazy and I just want to give credit where credit to do and that's to me because I didn't. I couldn't freak that way more.
Didn't you host the Sagal?
No, I fully went on Netflix without frozen mouth.
Yeah, that's just like women in STEM at that point.
Really? Because I thought of it as like some type of karma. I was like, okay, and I'll take this. I did something bad and I apologize. I repent. Whenever something like that goes wrong, I go, who did I piss off?
Wait, so you're just checking off your karma boxes? You're like, if this is the moment of the day? Okay, cool.
I don't check off my karma boxes. I actually check off other people's. Like, I'm still waiting for other people's to hit. And then I'll check theirs off.
Well, that's the problem with karma. The more it hits, the more you're like, and what about these other people?
Sometimes I'm like, that karma should have gone to someone else and I know exactly who.
But I do have to say, I sleep peaceful at night. That's all I have to say. My karma's clean. My karma's clean.
You know what saying I don't like is my side of the street is clean. I hate that saying.
Who's saying that to you?
I don't know. I feel like.
Are you in the mafia?
Like, I just like see it.
My side of the street is clean. Or maybe was that a Kelly Clarkson song?
I don't know where I'm seeing it, but I'm seeing it.
Wait, what was the third thing?
What was the third thing? I'm getting my third, I'm getting my third microneedling session.
In like the beginning of August and then that's it. Then you're done. Then I'll only get it once a year and that's.
Why do I feel like your microneedling is like your book club? You're like, girls, we're doing our third microneedling this month.
I'm obsessed with my microneedling. I just think it really works.
Has it been working? Like, do you see a difference?
I do feel like I see a difference.
What about internally?
Well. I do have a group chat going on with, not even a group chat. I have multiple text threads going on with different people about finding me a new therapist.
It's hard.
I'm getting people together that have never even met before.
That's crazy. You didn't run this by me at all.
Being like.
I love how you're like, Hannah's too close to the source. She's too close to the sun.
It'd be a conflict of interest. Anyone that's working on you certainly can't work on me. They'd die.
No, I would never give them.
It'd be overload.
We can't have the same therapist. That would be too powerful.
No, I actually think that is like illegal.
We use the same psychics and we use the same energy healers.
And lawyers and agents.
Sorry, my energy healer is my lawyer.
You know, it's so funny. A friend, one of my friends texted me the other day and goes, I, I'm gifting you an astrology appointment with my favorite astrologer. And I'm like, this is girlhood.
I don't want flowers.
Me neither.
Book me an astrology appointment.
Literally goes emails in your inbox, like for June, just like think, just wanted to do something like nice and whatever. And I was just like, yeah, this is a good gift.
Let's normalize getting cat psychics for your friend. Like that's way better than being like, here's a candle.
That's a, it's a phenomenal gift that's like an experience that you don't have to, also like, where do you get a gift card nowadays? Where are you going to getting a gift card nowadays?
Yeah, the email doesn't hit the same.
It doesn't.
Someone an email. Cause I'm like spam.
I'm like, yeah, I deleted it. And also like you're saving that email and remembering, oh, I have a gift card. Let me go get that. Like I loved a physical gift card as a child because I thought like I had a credit card. It doesn't hit the same. Remember when like in the grocery stores, they started like every gift card was there and you could get any gift card from anywhere. I thought that was real innovation.
Wait, we're aging ourselves.
Are we?
Talking about.
Gift cards.
Physical gift cards.
So anyway.
So I'm excited for you.
What was I saying?
You were saying you're your third micronatalization.
Oh yeah. So then that, I think that was my third and final thing.
You're like, and I'm done.
Oh my god, Kitty's being so cute, sorry. Um, okay, back to Hulu.
I do have to say, it does feel like Christmas morning.
And I also just feel like we're in such a good place with the Gigglers right now, like the Gigglers, the Gigglers are ready. They're like, give it to me.
Everyone's watched you, like, work for it. Like, we've watched you be on tour for literally two years. So like, we, I feel like the Gigglers feel just as in it.
The Gigglers are tired.
Yeah, like, we're exhausted. Like, I can't see you in another city. It's too much.
Well, what I love so much about the Gigglers is I did a couple podcasts to promote the special. And a couple of them came out yesterday. And the Gigglers are obviously excited. Like, they're like, we're gonna listen to all of them. However, they were like, babe, are you okay? This is a lot of podcasts. When did you do these? Was it all in the same week? Like, the Gigglers care less about, like, the Gigglers wanna make sure I'm okay.
And because you're so motivating to me, I like when you take a break, cuz I'm like, phew.
No, the Gigglers are literally in my DMs, be like, Hannah, you don't need to do another podcast, you're good, we need you to rest. Like, they are tracking my sleep schedule. So, to all the Gigglers, I feel like I did fewer podcasts to promote because, one, we have Giggly Squad and I don't shut up. But, two, just cuz you run out of stories.
I have to go out on the sidewalk and do something illegal, I have no more stories.
No, and also, like, people get mad when I talk about being from Brooklyn and playing tennis and my grandpa. But I'm like, you guys, I can't make up new stuff about myself.
I'm actually gonna start. I'm gonna just, like, start being a guy and, like, make things up about myself.
Start being a guy.
Like, yeah, let's go with that. Let's just go with that, sure.
I did do David Spade and Dana Carvey's podcast, which was, you guys know I love older men. I was in my element. I couldn't believe I was just riffing with, like, two comedy legends. They're just girls, girls. They're just one to giggle. And they giggle at the silliest stuff.
You know how, like, they say, you get a dog and you, like, love your dog, you love your cat, you start to look like your animal. You have a best friend, you start to, like, look like each other. Tell me that they are not, like, the man version of, like, that's my best friend. And so, like, we kinda look like.
And I love them. They're like us, because they're opposites. Like Dana's literally living on a farm.
And then like David Spade is like.
Getting paparazzi.
I literally, I feel like I saw David Spade getting paparazzi'd by like TMZ and had a, and I've seen other people recently be paparazzi'd by TMZ. And in my head, though, when I saw him, I was like TMZ is still a thing. Like, I don't know why he think like, there's something about him that is very like 2000s to me. Like, I feel like maybe that's when I first like knew who he was, like was introduced to who he was.
Speaking of TMZ, I've been getting some messages being like, Hannah, can you stop being PR trained? It's taken me six years. Let a girl have some growth. Cause yesterday I got a text from my publicist. She was like, I did the Today Show and she's like TMZ is outside. Just letting you know, let's keep it cute. So the whole day I just kept going, let's keep it cute.
I love that we're getting older and we're getting positions of power because yeah, keep it like that. You get the vibe. You don't have to say anymore.
No, well, also I've never kept it cute in my entire life. And yesterday I woke up and I said, I'm gonna start keeping it cute.
What did they say to you when you walked out? Anything?
So I ended up kind of speeding by.
Oh, good. One thing I would love to talk about re Today Show. The socks and the shoes, honey. I I loved it.
Thank you. Cause the gigglers in the comments didn't know what to do. They were like, we like some stuff. We don't know where Paige stands yet. And, and you were, you were holding out on them.
I did it. Did you post a grid?
No, I didn't post a grid. You were waiting for the grid.
Are you celebrating today? Are you doing anything? What are you doing? Oh, you're going to Taylor Struckers. You're having all your friends over.
Wait, no.
All your friends are going.
Well, first of all, all my comedy friends are on the road. And then I feel like I have like my close friends, but then if I go like a little out, it becomes crazy. Like it's like too many people. So I got, it's basically me and my mom.
You got anxious about inviting people and so then you decided not to invite anyone? And that, ladies and gentlemen, is the thesis of your 30s.
No, because I was like, I couldn't, if I invite-
Yeah, no, I get it. Yeah.
Then I have to invite someone else, then I have to invite someone else, then I have to invite someone else. Actually, I invited someone who like, doesn't know anyone else, and she responded to me and then I didn't respond to her.
Perfect.
Cause I was like, actually, I don't know if this is a good fit right now. And I don't want to put you in that situation. So I think I rescinded an invite. Cause I wouldn't want, I realized I put her in a difficult position. I don't want people making friends at this gathering.
Telling, sorry, I have cat hair. You didn't tell me about this.
Well, you got a long-haired cat, but it doesn't do that. Because you wanted the aesthetics. And now you have white hair on your, on your product.
No, it's like, literally, I feel sticky. And you want to know something? Because of my hobby, my face is at any given time sticky. And so I will literally leave an interaction with Kitty and like, I'll have to rip my face off.
But that's just means that you reapply more layers, which you know you love to do.
Back to Hulu for a quick second, I started watching Not Suitable for Work.
Yes.
It's so cute. I have so many shows right now, I feel like I'm-
It's so funny, because, um, four weeks ago, you said there's nothing on TV.
Now I'm inundated.
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Nope. I'm having a full Helsa moment.
We can't stop doing Helsa because they really show, like they go in right at the waist the right way. It's chic, it's classy. So that's what we've been wearing a lot from Revolve.
And I also love her dresses. I feel like I've ordered a bunch of summer dresses recently.
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So then I can focus on my guests and maybe convince one of them they need a cat. For all my fellow cat parents, be guest ready with Arm and Hammer Hardball Cat Litter. Find it now at Walmart or Amazon.
Are you watching Love Island?
Okay, here's my thing. I have not started US. I'm, I'm really upset that US is on at the same time UK is on.
Oh, you mean not the exact same like 8:00 PM time?
No, just like both seasons are on and that's a, that's a lot of Love Island.
Well, this is giving when I was obsessed with The Bachelor and it was two hours a night. And I was like, I had a full family.
Yeah, it's getting, it's hard to manage and I, I hate to say this, but the, but the, but the Love Island America is so vastly different, I feel like, from Love Island UK when it first started. This is the first time ever that I have felt like, oh, I can't watch Love Island like, and not because I'm like, oh, they're so much younger, which they are. But I started Love Island USA because I was like, whatever, I'll just let UK rack up and then I'll go through it. I had to turn it off because one of the girls goes, I'm, she's introducing herself to like three other girls and she goes, I'm from New Hampshire.
And the, mind you, this is Love Island USA. She goes, I'm from New Hampshire and the other three girls look at her as if she has said a small. Country in the middle of nowhere that has zero tourism. And the girl responds and goes, do you guys know where that is? All the
All the girls were like, no, you stupid bitch. We're on Love Island. Why the fuck?
I'm here for love, not geography.
And she goes, it's right above Boston and I in my own home by myself with Kitty, I start laughing because I'm like, guys, that's hilarious television. Like that is.
I mean, the editors were like, thank you.
Not even a niche state. Like a lot happens in New Hampshire. I feel like New Hampshire just talks about it. I'm.
Well, especially if you live in the Northeast.
Yeah, this one girl was from Philly.
I love people from Philly.
It's like, it's important for you to know.
Wait, did I talk about meeting the cast of Love on the Spectrum?
No, you didn't.
At the AMAs?
No.
Oh my God. So I get to the AMAs with my mom. I'm nervous. And they put us in this room like before the show starts with like all the other like presenters. I don't even know who's in this room, but I immediately was like, oh my God, like how I don't know. I have an hour to of like small talk. I don't know what to do.
And Dez texts me and he was like, I just saw a photo. The cast of Love on the Spectrum is there. You have to find them. And I was like, okay, I like having like a goal and like I have a project. And some people were coming up to me and I swear to God, I was like, I'm I'm so great to see you guys again. I love you. Like it was some LA comics. And I was like, I need to bother the people on Love on the Spectrum. And when I tell you, I never bother people. I never bother people, but doesn't I cry through Love on the Spectrum, like laughing, crying. It's the most beautiful show in the world. And I don't like bothering people.
You bother me all the time.
I only bother you and my mom and people I love. So I go up to Logan and if you guys haven't watched Love on the Spectrum, you have to watch it. Like this isn't a joke. This isn't a bit. This is serious. So he always said that he loves girls with straight curly hair.
I go up to him and I had my hair like waved. I swear to God, he was like, and this is what I've been waiting for.
And I stood there and I knew it too.
He's like, are you getting a load of this? Take a picture because this is what I mean when I'm trying to explain it.
No, he fully was like, let's get a photo. And he was like, hi, and I'm like Logan, like you're my everything. And at one point, I was, so I'm talking to him and I was like, I think I asked him what his sign was. I'm like, I'm a Leo. And then he's like, how, when were you born? Now, one thing about me is I'm not afraid to tell people my age.
I'm out here, I'll, I'll say it. You don't have to ask, I'll tell you.
I'm not either.
I feel like there's, it's something like if you're, oh, I don't tell people, which is like totally fine. It's what we were taught. It's giving, I'm ashamed. And one thing about me, I'm not ashamed.
Why were we taught that?
Even looking at someone be like, no, you look like you're whatever is still shaming them.
Every time someone says their age and I have an, a reaction, an involuntary reaction, I wanna kill myself in that moment. Like whether my, even, even if my reaction is like, you look gorgeous, I always feel like it sounds condescending. Like one of my girlfriends, not even, one of this girl that I know said to me, oh yeah, she said it like in passing conversation. She was like, oh yeah, for my 38th birthday. And I go, you're 38? And she was like, yeah. And I was like, oh my God, you look so good. And right after I said it, I was like, why would I say that? I was like, why did I say that? Like, I genuinely meant it. Like you look so, I would have never thought you were 38, but also like,
yeah, you could be 38. Why, why is that crazy that you look so good and you're 38?
It's not our fault. Like I'll literally, cause you'll meet someone who's older than you and then you immediately feel like you have to like compliment them.
Why is that?
It's like so much deeper and darker than us.
Where like if a 26 year old says to me, oh my God, you look so good, like 33, you look so good. I'm like, You little bitch.
No one talks about how in your twenties, no one goes, oh, you look like you're twenty-two. Or like, oh, you, like, there's an age where people start being like, oh, it's okay. You don't look that age.
And I remember when that started happening to me and I'm like, oh, no.
But I did recently, actually, Kazzy David posted like a whole thing about ages. And I didn't look at it fully, but it made me laugh because it was like thirty-four. You're old as fuck. And they're like thirty-five. You're young again.
Because you're not forty, but thirty-four, you're like the oldest of the thirties. Thirty-four is thirty-nine, but then thirty-five is thirty-two.
Totally. And I'm thirty-three, which is like twenty-eight.
Yeah, thirty-three, you're a baby.
I'm a child. I'm like, not even in my thir- I actually, at thirty-three, you get removed from your thirties. You're back, you're twenty-eight, thirty-four, they put you back in. It's very niche, but it's very real.
So Logan was like, when were you born? And like everyone at the tables, we were with Connor, we were with their moms, like it was a full kiki.
And I was like ninety-one and Logan looks at me and he goes, I love older women.
Well, I'll die.
I go, I have a husband, Logan. And he goes, your husband's very lucky. And then we just kept taking photos and sending videos to Dez. Dez was loving it. Logan has the sweetest relationship with his sister.
Wait, Logan who?
Logan on the show, you have to watch it.
Okay, sorry.
I'm not explaining Logan to you because I actually can't. You have to take it in because his vibe and his aura is something that cannot be explained on a podcast.
Wait, who are we talking? You ever get so deep in a story with your friend? Yeah, that you're like, wait, I think I missed him a couple of times.
Wait, do you know how many relationships? I'm way too late to ask what someone's name is, like the actual person's name.
I don't so much have that with like, I feel like in romantic relationships where it's like gone on multiple days. But I feel like when you're... Like working, if you like work with another company or like another department, there's always someone where you're like, what the fuck is their name? And I've known them for six months to a year.
Well Paige and I do a lot of freelance and sometimes you meet someone and you don't know if you're gonna see them again.
And then it turns out you see them throughout the entire day, but you didn't process it in the beginning. And it's totally fine to be like, I'm so sorry, um, I didn't catch your name.
Yes, wait.
But not after four hours.
That will happen to me so many times, like I'll see someone and I'll like recognize them and I'm like, I don't know who this is, but I know that I know this person. And then it'll come out that like five years ago, we worked on a project together. And every time that happens to me, in my head and my heart, I think, wow, thank God you're not a fucking asshole. Because you have to work with all these people again. And if you were an asshole four years ago on this random job, like how awkward would today be? And it almost is like, it almost like reminds, almost like re-encourages myself when that happens to me.
Cause I'm like, oh yeah, like make good decisions every single time.
Say please and thank you.
Yeah, well, it just like also reminds you that there's like such assholes out there because sometimes it's like that happens to me. And they know someone I know, I'm like, oh, I know that you enjoy, you enjoy me way more.
Well, I, speaking of that stuff, I, I've been on my spray tans, I'm back on my spray tans. And the spray tan girls have stories. Cause they're spray tanning personalities, you know, especially in New York City.
One of my favorite spray tan stories is when a spray tan artist came to my place after being at a reality TV person's place before me.
Let's just say, she looked like she saw a ghost.
And I was like. Are you okay? She was like, yeah, I just got yelled at during the spray tan. And I'm like, what was going on? And she's like, well, I walked in and she was drinking wine. And I was like, go off. It's
A Friday night, yeah.
It's Friday night or it's Monday morning, like whatever you want. Do whatever you
Do whatever you want.
You need to get through this life.
If I could tattoo that on my forehead, do whatever you want. I don't, I don't give a shit.
You have free will.
So she said she's giving this person a spray tan and they're drunk and they're spilling the wine on themselves. And then yelling at her because of the spray tan is getting, you can't.
Number one rule, you can't get what?
You can't get wine in your spray tan, number one rule. So she's literally gonna fail regardless and just had a full fight with the person. Um, and then showed up and then she was like, you are an angel. I'm like, yeah, I don't really drink anymore.
You're like, or I just douse myself with liquids and then beat the shit out of you. Like, I just let you in my door and said, you can keep your shoes on.
But anyway, love on the spectrum. These boys have these like amazing sisters who were like their best friends. Like one of them is literally like his security guard at this point. Like this guy Connor has gotten so famous and the amount of people asking him for photos. And I, I turned to his sister Anna and I was like, are you like his bodyguard? She's like this little adorable, cute girl. And she's like, yeah, but I always have been growing up.
That is so sweet.
Getting emotional and then I find out like she's a giggler. Logan's sister's a giggler, like all these girls are gigglers. And like, it just makes me cry. Like how are only the coolest, nicest, supportive, funny, beautiful women gigglers?
You know what's crazy too? I didn't finish the most recent season, but so I don't know what happens at the end of it. Or this could have even been just like social media stuff. But I saw a couple of the cast members, family members go on TikTok and be like,
I don't even know if they were like explaining a situation, but they said like, hey, you know, like I know, we know everyone has an, has opinions and if you could just keep the conversation. I'm like, this is love on the spectrum. Who the fuck is in the comments being like, that's actually not what you said?
The internet.
Like, I was like, I can't believe you even have to make this video. That's insane.
The internet will come for anyone.
It's actually like really dark and scary.
No, it's really dark.
I hate to say it, but I feel like Gen Z kind of like,
and I, I don't want to say it, because maybe it's alpha and maybe it's young Gen Z.
Not the gigglers.
Not the Gen Z that's listening to me right now.
Not the Gen Z that's listening that was raised by Paige DeSorbo.
I think they ruined Love Island a little like, because I'm like, wait, why is it so hateful now? Compared to like a couple of years ago. It's kind of crazy.
I used to just like, when The Bachelor was on, like I watched it.
And then you go to bed.
Well, there was no like live tweeting. Well, I even guess there was.
I feel like there was, but I wasn't like live tweeting also. Yeah, the, the fandom of stuff, I guess brings people together.
And I guess like hating one person really can bond a community.
And like it is so fun when the whole, like, okay, perfect example is like the Knicks. Like it is so fun when an entire community is like watching something like.
And rooting for someone.
Yeah, rooting for something. So like, I love that about Love Island. But sometimes it gets like, it's like, okay, guys, enough. It's like, I looked into her uncle's sister's grandma and it's like, oh my God.
Also, I, I, I love to give the example of even like, I know fan favorite Leah.
I think she was like interviewed by chicks in the office or something and she was like, when I tell you I like, I didn't know that I was gonna be the star. And it's like, cuz when they're filming, they're not, they don't know what good parts people are gonna show.
Right. Love Island, I just get nervous cuz they are so young, so I get like
No, they're literally
nervous for them. Yeah. I'm like, I don't want anyone to be so, people are just so crazy to them. It's nuts.
Well, Alandria gave an interview recently and she was basically like, I had a job I really loved.
She's like, I loved my nine to five and I was like, I'll do this show, but I told them I'll be back. Like, I love this. I love my job. And then she realized like, oh, I can, I can do this other thing, but she, she basically was like, I sacrificed my peace and my life, um, but I really liked my old life too.
She's the tiniest little girl in person. She's so cute in person.
No, I know. I hung out with her, um, at Sports Illustrated. So sweet.
I didn't watch the show. I didn't know she was southern. I was like, oh my god, I love your accent. I love southern people. They're so, it's like America's British.
Like, why are you saying a lot of that?
How sad. It's like the British in our own backyard.
You know what is funny to think about? Like, it's not even funny to think about, just like, how do accents happen? Like, I don't get it. Like, that is one of those things in the world that it's like, you could explain it to me a million times. I'm still not ever gonna get it.
And at what point of the highway does it decide, oh, now they don't talk like this?
Yeah, like, what is, I don't get it.
Well, I thought like at least all Italians in New York sound the same. No, your dad sounds completely different than like my papa.
I've been told, yeah, I've been told like, I say certain things weird and I sound more upstate.
And upstate is almost like Midwest.
Like hit, no, no, no, like you hit some.
How dare you?
Every now and then, your dad says, like, he hits syllables hard.
I mean, it's, it's basically considered like broadcasting English. Like, it's like.
Kitty?
We're actually doing something.
Wait, Kitty's like, and we're done with the podcast.
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I went shopping.
In the flesh?
I went shopping for you. For Italy.
I told you not, I told you not to do that.
I know, that's why, okay, I was going for you. I went to the RealReal in LA. Cause I like looking at expensive stuff that I wouldn't buy that maybe you would buy. And I kept seeing all this cute stuff, but you know what? My ego was bruised from the, and I decided not to send you stuff.
Oh, my God. Don't ever feel like that.
You know when you feel like you're, you're losing? And I'm like, if I send her something, it has to be really fucking good.
Do you feel disconnected? Do you feel like we're disconnected?
No, not at all. I feel like we're where we should be. But I felt like I, I was, I got loosey-goosey and was sending you risks. And I was like, sending you all this stuff and. I just feel like you've lost confidence in my picking ability, so now I'm overthinking everything and I saw, I know what you like. You like a little short white dress, a little boxy, a little, a little boxy, preppy, little short.
I actually just bought a pair of zebra vintage Gucci mini shorts that have like a dash of red in them, because red is like very big for the summer.
Oh, I didn't know that.
And I just bought a pair of red thong kitten heel sandals to go with it.
Oh, you should see my face, it was like the Britney bro scream meme, bro, when you say thong, I was like, mm, and then you're like sandals, and I was like, oh.
Wait, what do you think about that being like a trend, like a flip flop kitten heel?
I like that, because it elongates the leg a little.
I know, you're like a professional shopper, I don't physically shop that much, but it's so much fun. I was like going through the racks and like, there's like a social rules going on, right? I'm going through my rack and I'm moving, like I'm not being annoying, I'm like boom, boom, make a decision. Some girl comes next to me and she's flying through the rack, like aggressive, and I'm like, it's, it feels like you're driving and someone comes up, not that I drive, but someone comes up right behind you on the highway and you're like, I'm doing the speed limit.
Oh, there's shopping rage for sure.
I'm doing a speed limit and she's going and I'm like, if, if we continue at this pace, like we're gonna clash, babe.
You think road rage in Florida on a highway is scary? Get in an outlet mall with two girls from Long Island, don't scratch your eyes out, okay?
And then I was like, we're gonna like, like, I'm not gonna let you play through, like, I was here first and I'm going through the rack and there's eighty other racks, why are you about to bulldoze me? Like, do you let them play through? Like, do you go, okay, if you're going fucking crazy, just go?
Absolutely not, I'm here.
But it's stressing me out. It's like I can't, I can't relax when you're like bulldozing.
I don't, if anyone is like trying to rush me in a place that I've elected to be at, that is a public place, no, you're not, like, get away from me. Also, if I'm in public, get away from me. Get away from me.
The second, there were so many racks and it wasn't busy and I'm going through and this lady.
How old was Shay?
She was older, but not old. I love how we're like, let's not talk about women's age. Just like, oh, this bitch.
This old ass bitch. I'm like, put her in a nursing.
She wasn't a girl's girl. She wasn't a girl's girl.
I only asked how old she was because I'm, because sometimes I feel like older women, like, I'm talking like old, old, don't realize like.
She wasn't old, old, but she did look like she could have had a full family at home, which is why like I'll give her some empathy. Cause like if I got away from the kids and I only had 30 minutes.
But also like, I'm not your child. You're not gonna like tell me what pace I'm going at or like to get out of your way.
Like, you know, when you can hear it, like I could hear the hangers, how fast she was going through it. And I start sweating, I start trying to go faster, but then I'm mad because I'm like, this was my mental health walk.
No, skip over me. Skip over, like.
Oh, it was really stressing me out, but I didn't buy anything and I felt like I saved money.
Hannah.
If you like something and it's expensive and you don't buy it, you made it.
No, I have the opposite. I will like wake up in the middle of the night and I'll be like, and now I had the opportunity to buy it and it's gonna be sold out and somebody else is gonna get it and they're gonna love it and they're gonna look amazing in it and I didn't pull the trigger. So no, I don't have that.
Wait, this is a huge discrepancy between me and you because this is also how I feel about dating, which I feel like you feel the same way, but I always say, which is true, no one got away.
Don't feel like that with clothes. Don't feel like that at all with clothes.
No clothes got away. I've never thought of an outfit. Like I don't need anything.
Oh, no, I feel the exact opposite. I could list you an article of clothing from each year that I've been alive.
That you've missed out on?
Hannah, I think about a pair of Burberry boots from 2005. My limits have no, they have no bounds.
Well, now I have empathy for you because sometimes like you, um, when you like can't spell or something, it's because you have so many seasons of fashion in your head.
I think about a blue and white dress that I ripped in 2006 and my mom knows exactly, if I say ripped, blue and white dress, 2006, my mom will go, ah.
Cancel Thanksgiving.
Don't even bring it up. I go, I can't. I, I will still actively, actually, this is sick. This is sick in the head. Couple of months ago, my mom sends me a dress on Instagram. She goes, looks like the blue and white dress. I knew it.
Oh, she, she chose violence.
Guys, we're going back 20 years.
That's what she meant when she texted you, RIP.
Like, I know exactly what blue and white, navy blue polka dot dress she's talking about.
Wait, you would have been so proud of me though, because last week, so last week I had to shoot something. And three days before, I got one of those forehead pimples where like it's deep. Like it's coming from your soul. Yeah, it's coming from your soul. It's, you don't even see a pore.
You pissed off an ancestor.
And it was funny because it started at Las Culturas where I thought, well, there was like a shade. Like, I'm like, is there a shade? Because it was like, starting to come. And I was like, do I have a like dent in my forehead? Because I'm like, I don't get pimples. It's not a pimple. I started feeling this pimple and then I realized, oh my God, I'm shooting something really important in three days. I go on Instagram, I was, lost my mind. I go on Instagram and I go, I need a cortisone shot. Where do I get one? And the gigglers, first of all, they're like, "Show us a pic."
You put this on your story?
I put it on my story for like, two hours. The gigglers, I'm like, "I'm in LA." "Where do I get a cortisone shot? I know you people are doing it."
A cortisone shot? Isn't that for when you're in pain?
When you like, when you like, your back goes out.
Yeah, you don't need to get, are people getting those? Wait, what?
Don't you, when you have a really bad pimple, don't you like, get a shot?
Yeah, but they're injecting it with like, saline, which is like, salt water.
So I panicked. I was like...
Where was I? Was I out of the country? Why didn't you call me?
It was up for like, two hours. I said, "I need a cortisone shot." And everyone started sending me doctors, and it got crazy, and then I actually scheduled. Like, I literally scheduled.
To go to a dermatologist to get it, like, injected?
Somewhere, yeah. And then I swear to God, I woke up in the morning, it was gone. I just put toothpaste on it. But I was fucking scared, for like, four hours. I was like, really, really scared.
I have to literally pray to Saint Anthony, go to Sephora by eight different things to... I'll, I never wake up the next morning and a pimple is gone.
It had its moment, and then it was like, "Okay, bye. Thanks for the Insta story."
When I get a pimple, it's like, "Hi, we're here. We have squatters rights, so we'll be here for the next seven years." And I'm like, "It's actually illegal. I've done so much to this home, like, to perfect it. You can't just move in."
My pimples come in, they go, "Oh, we actually were at the wrong party. Thank you. Don't want to be here." This is...
Your pimples are like, "Wait, it's actually like..."
No, I just, it's worse here than wherever I was. I want to go back. Your pimples come in and they go, "Oh, she takes care of us. We're doing masks. We're go, we're getting consultations." My pimples come, they go, "This is gross. I'm leaving."
Like, I think it's crazy that I've never had lice before. And like, my hair's so clean, it's so, like, they could move so well, like...
You didn't have lice? Did you not have a childhood?
Hannah, I've never wa- even crazier than that.
Have you had chicken pox?
I had chicken pox.
Okay, thank god.
Even crazier than that, I don't remember lice ever even being a thing in my middle school. Like, I could not tell you one person that ever had lice.
Maybe because it was so cold upstate.
Actually, that doesn't sound wrong. That like doesn't sound-
I put margarine in our hair. It was actually so fun. Getting lice was like when everyone gets braces. Like, you were like, I got it. Did you not get lice?
Never had it. I don't even remember getting like checked for lice in middle school.
I was always getting checked for lice. Everyone had lice every three seconds and they put margarine in your hair. It actually was really fun.
Like, I didn't hear about lice, I'm not kidding, till I moved to New York City, had my first job, and my boss's like children had it. I was like, "People are getting lice?" Like that-
You're like, "I thought that was for feral animals."
I was like, "What is it, sixteen eighty-five? What are you guys doing down here?" I was like, "What are you talking about?" That, going to camp every summer, and I was like, "Guys, I don't know what's going on."
I'm like, "That's where you got lice? You're all at camp every summer? Why don't you stay home? Stay home with your mom, and you won't get lice."
Wait, I was just talking to my mom about this. My parents sent my brother to camp once. And it was like a sports camp, because like I was going to sports camp, and my brother was like, "I don't want to go to sports camp." They're like, "You'll love it." The camp had to call my parents, because apparently you write letters home.
But like, the camp reads all the letters, just like make sure there's not anything weird happening. The camp had to call my parents to be like, "Hey, just letting you know, your son wrote a really dramatic letter."
What did he say?
Because my brother like doesn't fuck around. Like, he was like, "I'm having the worst time I've ever had. Get me the fuck out of this place, whatever." By the time it got to my parents, he was already having a good time. He made friends, but they were like, "He's-"
"Dear Lenore, count your fucking days."
No, they literally had a-
"Get your little ass in that fucking car. Come get me."
And they were like, "We swear he's made a friend since and he's having the best time, but in the three days that it took for to get to you-"
Why do I feel like Daniel has like a quill and an ink?
I was just like, "He has a feather?"
He's like, "Dear former family, I scoff at the thought of you guys."
No, he literally was like, "I will never see you again, and I have no respect for you and any of your morals, and how dare you do this to me."
I wish I was not your son. Goodbye. No, that's crazy. I had a bad, Stephanie went to camp all through like middle school and high school, and she fucking loved it.
Yeah, some people, well, you ever see someone who's like, "That's my camp friends?" And I'm like, "Oh, you guys have been through some shit."
Now that I think about it, I used to bully Stephanie about her camp friends all the time. And like, it was out of pure jealousy of just like, "So you think you're closer to your camp friends?"
Yeah, cuz they're like, they've kayaked and stuff. Like, that's like a bonding that you'll-
How can I compete with that?
No. Yeah, and they like, smores.
That is. I'm like, "You guys have friendship bracelets, Stephanie. I can't..." Our bonding was like a pregnancy test in the McDonald's bathroom junior year. It's like, oh my-
We weren't hugging trees.
Okay. We had things to do.
Is it called dry gagging? What's it when you like, can't puke?
Dry heaving.
Dry heaving. I was dry heaving in a Sonic. Sorry, that's my pretend suburban life.
Oh, God. Anyway, you guys, stream, then my business on Hulu, and then if you love me, stream it again. Put it on twice. I think twice will be what will make me happy. And love you guys forever. Thank you for giggling with us, and I hope you guys giggle so fucking hard the special. And have the best weekend ever.
See ya.
Bye.
Hey, it's Hannah and Paige. Thank you so much for tuning into Giggly Squad every week.
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Page updated October 30, 2026 · transcript and summary are machine-generated