Pretty Little Episode #12

Tig and Fortune answer a *pressing* question on today's Pretty Little Episode-- why is FORTUNE-MARIE always the one who gets in trouble?! Handsome is hosted by Tig Notaro, Mae Martin, and Fortune FeimsterSubmit questions to speakpipe.com/handsomepodFollow us on social media @handsomepodMerch at handsomepod.com http://handsomepod.com/Watch Handsome on YouTube http://youtube.com/@handsomepodThis is a Headgum https://headgum.com/ podcast. Follow Headgum on Twitter https://x.com/headgum, Instagram https://www.instagram.com/headgum/, and Tiktok https://www.tiktok.com/@headgum. Advertise on Handsome https://gumball.fm/shows/handsome via Gumball.fm http://gumball.fm/. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Mae Martin?

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• 0:50Mae Martin?

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• 1:04Speaker 02

  This is a HeadGum Podcast. Handsome.

• 1:10Mae Martin?

  Chat to my friends on the handsome pod. Chat to my friends on the handsome pod.

• 1:18Fortune Feimster?

  Pretty little episode. Welcome to a pretty little episode. I am Fortune Famester.

• 1:24Tig Notaro?

  And I am your friend Tig Notaro.

• 1:27Fortune Feimster?

  You are our friend Tig.

• 1:30Tig Notaro?

  I am, I am. I was gonna say I'm a friend to everyone, but I feel like there's a few people that probably doesn't.

• 1:37Fortune Feimster?

  They're not on that list.

• 1:38Tig Notaro?

  Yeah, I'm probably not on their list, but I would say the majority.

• 1:43Fortune Feimster?

  That's good.

• 1:44Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 1:45Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah. How you doing bud?

• 1:47Tig Notaro?

  I'm doing all right. I'm in Toronto. You are not.

• 1:51Fortune Feimster?

  No. It's hot as balls here. Just

• 1:56Tig Notaro?

  Jen.

• 1:57Fortune Feimster?

  Tig, I'm telling you, I don't know a lot about balls. I've heard they're hot when they get, you know, stuck in the swampy areas.

• 2:07Tig Notaro?

  Terribly, terribly. I cannot believe how much balls come up.

• 2:13Fortune Feimster?

  I know.

• 2:15Tig Notaro?

  On this podcast.

• 2:16Fortune Feimster?

  I know. I don't know how that happens, but somehow it does.

• 2:20Tig Notaro?

  Mm hmm. Yeah.

• 2:21Fortune Feimster?

  But yeah, it's hot here. Is it nicer weather there? Is it chilly?

• 2:25Tig Notaro?

  Yeah, it's, uh, it's definitely starting to get chilly. I mean, look, it's not as cold as it gets here in Toronto, but it's, it's getting, like at night when I go to bed, I can feel that it's, it's chilly.

• 2:40Fortune Feimster?

  When you, when you have your onesie on?

• 2:42Tig Notaro?

  No, I'm just in my ponties.

• 2:45Fortune Feimster?

  It gets really cold there. You're gonna be there in the coldest of months.

• 2:50Tig Notaro?

  Yes, I am.

• 2:51Fortune Feimster?

  You're gonna blow away Tig.

• 2:53Tig Notaro?

  I know. Blow away? Why would I blow away? Cause it's cold?

• 2:57Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, it'll be cold and I assume there will be some wind involved at some point.

• 3:01Tig Notaro?

  It's so funny. When I was little, I was such a picky eater. Like it was real bad.

• 3:08Fortune Feimster?

  Jack's too.

• 3:10Tig Notaro?

  My mother used to say, if you don't eat, you're gonna blow away to Windville.

• 3:15Fortune Feimster?

  Mm hmm.

• 3:16Tig Notaro?

  Have you ever heard of Windville? Have we talked about this on the podcast?

• 3:19Fortune Feimster?

  Heard of Windville, but it makes total sense to me.

• 3:22Tig Notaro?

  Well, I thought it was real. I thought it was a place, it was apparently where skinny kids, uh, lived.

• 3:29Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, I never blew there.

• 3:33Tig Notaro?

  I didn't blow there either, but I also, it didn't change anything for me. I just felt like, whatever, I'll take my chances, you know? I'm not eating this hamburger.

• 3:45Fortune Feimster?

  Mm hmm.

• 3:45Tig Notaro?

  I'm gonna have a piece of cheese and a pickle and I'll be on my way.

• 3:49Fortune Feimster?

  Piece of cheese and a pickle? That was the meal?

• 3:52Tig Notaro?

  That was about what my, uh, palate.

• 3:54Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 3:55Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 3:55Fortune Feimster?

  I didn't have Windville, but mine was like, if you don't stop eating, you're going to fat camp.

• 4:03Tig Notaro?

  Did that come up?

• 4:05Fortune Feimster?

  Um, I never went to fat camp, but I did get sent to a nutrition class when I was 12. 12 or 13.

• 4:13Tig Notaro?

  Was there a threat of, fat camp didn't come up?

• 4:16Fortune Feimster?

  No, because we couldn't have afforded fat camp anyway, whatever that was. Uh, but somehow I think through insurance, we were, and my mom knew a lady at church.

• 4:28Tig Notaro?

  Of course.

• 4:28Fortune Feimster?

  Who held nutrition classes.

• 4:31Tig Notaro?

  And did you go to one?

• 4:33Fortune Feimster?

  It was like me and six 45 year olds.

• 4:38Tig Notaro?

  That is hilarious. Wait, you actually went?

• 4:42Fortune Feimster?

  I went to like three classes.

• 4:44Tig Notaro?

  And insurance covered that?

• 4:46Fortune Feimster?

  I think, I, I won't, or the, or the nice church lady gave us the deal.

• 4:51Tig Notaro?

  I bet that's what it was.

• 4:52Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, you know, one of those classes, kind of like what, when, remember when Oprah lost a lot of weight and was like, she brought out that, oh, wheelbarrow or whatever.

• 5:01Tig Notaro?

  Yeah, wagon lard.

• 5:03Fortune Feimster?

  Look at all this fat, yeah.

• 5:04Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 5:05Fortune Feimster?

  It was kind of like, this is how much sugar is in all this stuff. And I was like, whoa.

• 5:10Tig Notaro?

  That looks delicious. That sounds good.

• 5:16Fortune Feimster?

  So, but then it didn't take then, but then like three years later, I went on a health kick and I lost like 50 pounds. And some of that did come back into my head of like, you know, that was when like counting fat grams was the big thing. I don't know if you remember that, that era.

• 5:36Tig Notaro?

  Vaguely. I had a friend that was always switching diets and she did like a cabbage soup diet. And then she was eating all like fat free cookies and.

• 5:46Fortune Feimster?

  It was that era, fat free cookie, everything. Yeah. Snack wells and things like that.

• 5:51Tig Notaro?

  Yeah. I feel like we lived in Austin then.

• 5:54Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 5:54Tig Notaro?

  Me and, me and my friend and, um, yeah, she was just living off of these fat free cookies and crack. She was like, this is incredible. There's no fat.

• 6:04Fortune Feimster?

  None of it was good for you. It was like, there might not be fat, but there's like all these other things.

• 6:09Tig Notaro?

  Chemical, there's not, you're not eating food. You might as well just ingest the cardboard box that came in.

• 6:15Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, but I could slam some snack wells cookies.

• 6:18Tig Notaro?

  Are they still around?

• 6:20Fortune Feimster?

  Honestly, I don't know because yeah, that was like a, that was like a big fad. Everything was fat free.

• 6:27Tig Notaro?

  How did that count? Like you, you count fat that you eat?

• 6:31Fortune Feimster?

  Like points, it would be like this many fat, you can have this many fat grams in a day.

• 6:36Tig Notaro?

  Hmm.

• 6:37Fortune Feimster?

  So I clearly, you know, none of it took too much, but I got, I got healthier in high school. So that's all that matters. So, so some of the information stuck, but I don't know how, I don't know how, I lost a bunch of weight, but I don't know how healthy I was. You know what I mean?

• 6:53Tig Notaro?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 6:54Fortune Feimster?

  But yeah, it's all, it's always a journey.

• 6:57Tig Notaro?

  Everything is, everything is.

• 7:00Fortune Feimster?

  It is, my friend. Well, maybe um, our friends have some questions on their journeys.

• 7:06Tig Notaro?

  Hmm, hmm, maybe, maybe so. I do, before we get into it, I have to brag about something.

• 7:12Fortune Feimster?

  Please.

• 7:13Tig Notaro?

  I got a text from Stephanie.

• 7:15Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 7:16Tig Notaro?

  That um, Max and Finn won their first baseball game. Their team is, is the worst in the.

• 7:25Fortune Feimster?

  In the league.

• 7:26Tig Notaro?

  In the league, yeah. But um, I don't know if I told you, but Finn was like, I think I need to join a different league. And um, today, Finn not only hit a home run, but he hit it out of the baseball park. And no kid in that league in the history of time has hit a ball out of the baseball park.

• 7:50Fortune Feimster?

  Wow, that's incredible. That's not easy.

• 7:53Tig Notaro?

  No, and Stephanie sent me videos and like.

• 7:57Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 7:58Tig Notaro?

  The whole team just jumped on top of him and Stephanie was like, I'm crying. Um, anyway.

• 8:05Fortune Feimster?

  That's so cool.

• 8:06Tig Notaro?

  It's so great. And then Max, I guess stole every base and didn't get caught or, or I guess tagged out, caught.

• 8:13Fortune Feimster?

  Caught.

• 8:15Tig Notaro?

  He wasn't caught. Um, he wasn't tagged out. So they had a pretty great, uh, they had a double header.

• 8:22Fortune Feimster?

  Amazing.

• 8:23Tig Notaro?

  Yeah, yeah, pretty cool.

• 8:25Fortune Feimster?

  Look at them keeping it handsome.

• 8:27Tig Notaro?

  I know, they really are.

• 8:29Fortune Feimster?

  That's awesome. High fives to Max and Finn.

• 8:32Tig Notaro?

  High fives. And yes, we can get into uh, what our handsome and pretty little listeners are wanting to ask us.

• 8:40Fortune Feimster?

  That's right.

• 8:41Speaker 04

  All right. This question comes from Belle.

• 8:43Fortune Feimster?

  Belle of the ball.

• 8:46Speaker 05

  G'day handsome from Sydney, New South Wales in Australia. I hope you're all doing well. Uh, low key have a crush on May. Feel good. That show Awakening, excellent. Anyway, my question for you all is why does Fortune always have to be the one that gets in trouble?

• 9:06Fortune Feimster?

  Thank you.

• 9:07Speaker 05

  I feel like you need to be getting in trouble a bit. I feel like when I see or hear someone do something wrong in my head, I, I go Fortune. And I feel like there should be a Tig equivalent.

• 9:22Fortune Feimster?

  That's right.

• 9:22Speaker 05

  Anyway, okay.

• 9:23Tig Notaro?

  Tig. What a letdown for Belle that May isn't even here to answer this or talk about it. It's, it's just me and you.

• 9:32Fortune Feimster?

  I was gonna say, join the list. A lot of people think May's hot, which we totally get. It's a very handsome group here.

• 9:40Tig Notaro?

  Yeah. I mean, take your pick of handsoms and it's always May.

• 9:45Fortune Feimster?

  Belle, it's, it's, it's, it's a thing we have to go through. Us and Jennifer Lopez, we're very handsome.

• 9:53Tig Notaro?

  What is that?

• 9:55Fortune Feimster?

  Tig, that was, that was my Australian accent.

• 9:59Tig Notaro?

  I know, but why Jennifer Lopez? Like I-

• 10:02Fortune Feimster?

  It's one of the few names I can say in an Australian accent is Jennifer Lopez.

• 10:08Tig Notaro?

  Okay. I did, I was like, well, this must be a line in a movie. I don't understand what's happening.

• 10:13Fortune Feimster?

  No, I can only say two words very well.

• 10:16Tig Notaro?

  Jennifer Lopez.

• 10:17Fortune Feimster?

  Jennifer Lopez and razor blades.

• 10:24Tig Notaro?

  I can't, I can't do that accent.

• 10:26Fortune Feimster?

  It's hard. Not all of, not everyone can be a chameleon like me.

• 10:31Tig Notaro?

  I can only do Cajun.

• 10:33Fortune Feimster?

  That I could do Cajun.

• 10:35Tig Notaro?

  Oh, you can't do Cajun, you. Yeah, buddy, you better learn how to do Cajun. I don't know, Cajuns are probably like, she can't do that. No, it's not Boston.

• 10:46Fortune Feimster?

  Is that Ben Affleck?

• 10:47Tig Notaro?

  Come here, you. Come, come here, you. Let me cut your hair, you.

• 10:52Tig Notaro?

  That is not Boston. I wonder if we have any Cajun listeners. We've got to.

• 10:58Fortune Feimster?

  There's gotta be, yeah.

• 11:00Tig Notaro?

  So I should get in trouble.

• 11:02Fortune Feimster?

  In trouble.

• 11:03Tig Notaro?

  Well, because you.

• 11:05Fortune Feimster?

  I'm naughty.

• 11:06Tig Notaro?

  Yeah, but you're a good little girl. And.

• 11:10Fortune Feimster?

  I'm a pretty little lady.

• 11:11Tig Notaro?

  You're a pretty little lady. You went to church. You made good grades, you know.

• 11:16Fortune Feimster?

  Rule follower.

• 11:17Tig Notaro?

  Yeah, you follow rules. So when you talk about sweaty hot balls. I'm so deeply disappointed in you, Fortune.

• 11:27Fortune Feimster?

  I think, I know. But it is fun to get you riled up sometimes, although many of the times Tig doing it, it's for comedic effect.

• 11:36Tig Notaro?

  I would say every single time. There hasn't been one, oh.

• 11:41Fortune Feimster?

  The first time might have been a genuine fortune.

• 11:44Tig Notaro?

  What was it? Do you remember?

• 11:46Fortune Feimster?

  I don't know. I probably said something dirty about hand jobs or something.

• 11:51Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 11:51Fortune Feimster?

  And you, that was your genuine reaction. And now, and then everyone got a kick out of it. And so now, now it's for comedic effect.

• 12:00Tig Notaro?

  But now, and still, and maybe we've talked about it, some people don't get the joke. And think that I am actually really upset with you.

• 12:10Fortune Feimster?

  Which is hilarious.

• 12:11Tig Notaro?

  Which is hilarious. Uh, and we can't stop the ride for that.

• 12:22Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, cause Jags read something a couple of weeks ago and they're like, they're like, did something happen on the podcast? Somebody thought Tig was mad at you. I go, Tig's not mad at me. I go, I don't know what we were talking about, but I can. Sure you didn't wasn't mad at me.

• 12:36Tig Notaro?

  That I was mad at you personally?

• 12:38Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, that you s- sounded annoyed or something. I'm like, it was a hundred percent a bit.

• 12:45Tig Notaro?

  I have a very dry delivery and sometimes I pretend to be upset. Like I was just at a pizza party and um, somebody was showing me, or I was showing them something on my, oh, I was showing the home run that Finn made. And the girl touched my phone and I was like, oh, oh no. And I pulled it away from her.

• 13:10Tig Notaro?

  And said, I'm sorry, you can't, please don't touch my phone. And she did look at me for a second like, uh, oh, I'm sorry, you know, that kind of thing. Um, so.

• 13:21Fortune Feimster?

  What did you do to annoy Tig?

• 13:24Tig Notaro?

  Oh, did she really think? Really?

• 13:27Fortune Feimster?

  I was like, I'm, I didn't do anything. I might have been naughty or dirty.

• 13:32Tig Notaro?

  Yeah, that's all that's ever happening. Um, but if, if, do you feel like I should get in trouble, Fortune? Should I get in trouble?

• 13:39Fortune Feimster?

  Well, that's the thing. There's not much that you could say that I think would like shock me or me have that reaction. Now, May, on the other hand, has had some shocking revelations. Being, you know, very sex positive, which is amazing, but sometimes I clutch my pearls.

• 14:00Tig Notaro?

  Yes, yeah.

• 14:03Tig Notaro?

  And then I yell at you.

• 14:04Fortune Feimster?

  And then I get in trouble.

• 14:06Tig Notaro?

  That's what's.

• 14:06Fortune Feimster?

  But that's all right.

• 14:07Tig Notaro?

  Think so crazy about being a comedian, especially for so long. Nothing real, I mean, I'll speak for myself. It's hard to offend me.

• 14:20Fortune Feimster?

  Same.

• 14:20Tig Notaro?

  It's hard to hurt my feelings.

• 14:22Fortune Feimster?

  Same.

• 14:23Tig Notaro?

  I've had people say, you know, like, hey, I've been meaning to talk to you about this, that time that, you know, I said this or that to you. And I'm like, first of all, who are you?

• 14:37Fortune Feimster?

  New number, who dis?

• 14:39Tig Notaro?

  Yeah, no, but like, I, I, it's just, it's really, I think it's such a different world because comedians sit around and, you know, tease and joke and say, tell weird stories and reveal everything. And so then somebody comes along and they're like, you know, hey, can you not, um, use my whatever? And it's like, yeah, no problem. And then they apologize later for telling you not to use something.

• 15:08Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 15:09Tig Notaro?

  And it's like, and it was a big deal for them to speak up, but then you're just like, I, I have people saying horrible things all the time around me or to me.

• 15:19Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 15:20Tig Notaro?

  I don't know.

• 15:20Fortune Feimster?

  I'm the same. I don't, I'm not easily offended. I don't get my feelings hurt easy. I'm pretty, like, I'm just used to, yeah, you can be like talking with a bunch of comedians, being vulnerable, and then they're making fun of you five minutes later. It's like-

• 15:33Tig Notaro?

  Absolutely.

• 15:34Fortune Feimster?

  Part of, part of the deal.

• 15:36Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 15:37Fortune Feimster?

  And we all do it to each other.

• 15:39Tig Notaro?

  Yes. And we all have different ways of doing it, different deliveries, all, all sorts of things. And that's what makes it fun and interesting. That's a song.

• 15:50Fortune Feimster?

  That's the song that we're singing.

• 15:53Tig Notaro?

  Singing together in Windville. Well, I don't think we answered the question for Bill.

• 16:00Fortune Feimster?

  I think we did.

• 16:01Tig Notaro?

  Did we? And, and here's the answer. The reason I don't get in trouble is because no one's actually getting in trouble.

• 16:09Fortune Feimster?

  There you go.

• 16:10Tig Notaro?

  Fortune.

• 16:12Fortune Feimster?

  See?

• 16:13Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 16:13Fortune Feimster?

  All right, next question. Hi, handsome podcast. This is Gene from Peoria, Illinois. And the question I have for you three comedic geniuses is, what joke have you heard from another comedian that has made its way into your daily lexicon? Like you bring it up to your significant other while you're walking around the house cleaning? Or have a joke with your friends about it? Or, you know, a family joke where you, uh, bring it up? Do you have a, a joke you love?

• 16:52Tig Notaro?

  Well, I mean, I really love this concept. I don't know that it's like infiltrated my-

• 17:00Tig Notaro?

  Day to day life. I mean, there's so many little gems out there. Um, I mean, I, you have one that I, I think I've told you, I just love the like, because she's my best friend.

• 17:12Fortune Feimster?

  Aw, that's good.

• 17:14Tig Notaro?

  Yeah, when I heard that years ago, I was like, oh, my God, that is so funny. I think that's, that was that joke of yours that like, put you on a map in my brain. You know what I mean? When you like are really aware of somebody. Like you've got, that's what got my attention.

• 17:34Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 17:35Tig Notaro?

  And then the comedian Bill Hicks. I love this concept so much. I just think it's so smart and silly and great, but uh, and true. But he talked about like, why is it that when people are on drugs? That they only think they can fly when they're on top of a building, not when they're just like on the streets. I just think that is so funny, like to picture somebody like flapping their arms, walking down the street and saying like, I can fly. Um, it feels very seventies or sixties for people to think they can fly when they're on drugs.

• 18:17Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 18:18Tig Notaro?

  I haven't heard about anybody thinking they can fly anymore.

• 18:22Fortune Feimster?

  That was uh, during the time when they were like warning us not to take, was it, was it PCP? You remember?

• 18:29Tig Notaro?

  Uh, yeah, uppers and downers, like, uh, don't take downers.

• 18:34Fortune Feimster?

  Cause they played, they used to play that, um, that PSA in, when I was in school of the girl jumping through the window or something.

• 18:42Tig Notaro?

  Oh.

• 18:43Fortune Feimster?

  Cause she took PCP.

• 18:45Tig Notaro?

  I don't even, what, oh, is that the same as angel dust?

• 18:49Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 18:50Tig Notaro?

  Okay, cause I remember growing up being like, do not do angel dust.

• 18:56Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, what was that?

• 18:58Tig Notaro?

  PCP, angel dust, you're gonna think you can fly.

• 19:02Fortune Feimster?

  And then they would, they would show that PSA to us. And um, we were like, oh my God, this is terrible.

• 19:09Tig Notaro?

  Yeah, I don't want to do that.

• 19:11Fortune Feimster?

  I don't want to jump through a window.

• 19:13Tig Notaro?

  No, thank you.

• 19:14Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 19:15Tig Notaro?

  Uh, what about you?

• 19:16Fortune Feimster?

  I love stories, obviously, because that's what I lean into. Nate Brigazzi has many stories I love. Um, but he has a whole bit about ordering coffee with cream. In Starbucks and they end up giving him coffee with whipped cream. So he goes through this whole thing of like, being an adult man, like, why would he order coffee with whipped cream? It's just, you have to listen to it. I can't do it justice. That bit and him, they might both be from his Tennessee Kid special, I want to say. That one and he drove by a horse that he thought was dead.

• 19:56Fortune Feimster?

  And he went through a whole scenario of what he and his friends would have to do to help um, pick up a dead horse.

• 20:05Fortune Feimster?

  Both are so funny.

• 20:08Tig Notaro?

  I'll have to check that out.

• 20:09Fortune Feimster?

  But one joke that uh, and I, I couldn't quote a single other joke of his, but this one I saw at the Comedy Store. Uh, and it made me laugh.

• 20:18Tig Notaro?

  Nate's, oh, Theovon.

• 20:20Fortune Feimster?

  Theovon did a joke once where he goes, so, so my cousin got bit by a gay.

• 20:30Fortune Feimster?

  And then he does, he has this long pause and he goes, so we'll see.

• 20:40Tig Notaro?

  That's funny.

• 20:42Fortune Feimster?

  And uh, it made me laugh because I wasn't like, I was like, because you know, when you hear Theo set something up, you're like, oh God, what is he about to say? And it just, it went in this whole other direction that I was not expecting and it made me laugh.

• 20:58Tig Notaro?

  So we'll see.

• 20:59Fortune Feimster?

  So my cousin got bit by a gay. So we'll see.

• 21:12Tig Notaro?

  What was that first thing that you said about Nate?

• 21:15Fortune Feimster?

  Uh, the coffee with cream?

• 21:17Tig Notaro?

  Oh, yeah, yeah. Uh, when Stephanie and I were going to Mississippi for my father's memorial. It was like out in the middle of nowhere. And um, and we stopped at some diner or something. I mean, just a middle of nowhere Mississippi kind of place. And they sold coffee. And um, Stephanie was like, oh, they sell, you know, coffee. Let's stop in there for coffee. And I was like, this is not gonna be like, you know.

• 21:55Fortune Feimster?

  Like a fine roasted bean.

• 21:57Tig Notaro?

  No, no, this is not even gonna be Starbucks. Um, and so we go in and she ordered, um, a coffee. It might have been a latte or something. Not only was it burnt terrible disgusting, but the woman behind the counter did say, you want some whipped cream on that?

• 22:20Tig Notaro?

  He was like whipped cream.

• 22:26Tig Notaro?

  She was so confused. And I was like, yeah, I don't think that there, this isn't a latte. Even if you ordered a latte, this is not a latte.

• 22:37Fortune Feimster?

  Oh, I will say too, uh, your Taylor Dane story. It comes on quite a bit on like Sirius XM on different comedy channels. And I will, I have sat outside like a gas station and just listened to the whole story.

• 22:53Tig Notaro?

  That's a thirteen or fourteen minute story.

• 22:57Fortune Feimster?

  I'll just sit there and listen.

• 22:58Tig Notaro?

  Wow, well, that's kind of you. Can I tell you what it started out as?

• 23:04Fortune Feimster?

  What?

• 23:04Tig Notaro?

  Twenty minutes.

• 23:07Tig Notaro?

  And I remember the first time I tried it out, I was at the Moore Theater. This is so many years ago. And I had not gotten it worked out and it was still at the twenty minute length. And I essentially told a boring story that bombed for twenty minutes. Cause it's so, even at fourteen minutes, if it's not going well, it's a struggle. And I buckled in.

• 23:36Fortune Feimster?

  You went in for it.

• 23:37Tig Notaro?

  I went in for it and I will never forget it and I'm sure the audience won't either. My apologies if you were there for that.

• 23:44Fortune Feimster?

  And look what it turned into though. What was your jeans answer?

• 23:48Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 23:48Fortune Feimster?

  Uh, the one we have is from a member of the handsome podcast. And it is Fortune, you hadn't swam. And my wife and I say that, uh, conservatively ten times a week to each other at some point. Thanks a lot for your answer. Really love the show. Amazing. That was my story about, uh, from my sweet and salty special where I couldn't do the butterfly. So I ran across the pool.

• 24:23Tig Notaro?

  Well, you've made it into the hearts and minds.

• 24:26Fortune Feimster?

  That's right.

• 24:28Tig Notaro?

  Of Gene and crew.

• 24:30Fortune Feimster?

  Gene.

• 24:30Tig Notaro?

  And many others too, Fortune.

• 24:32Fortune Feimster?

  I did forget about his part of it being part of your like daily life. I don't think I'm like yelling anyone's joke on a daily basis. But these are jokes I think of quite a bit.

• 24:42Tig Notaro?

  Same. I don't think I have anything from anybody's stand up that.

• 24:48Fortune Feimster?

  But that would be like if you're a dentist and you're like constantly talking about another dentist and their work. You know what I mean?

• 24:55Tig Notaro?

  Yeah, kinda.

• 24:59Fortune Feimster?

  Tig, it's pretty much the same thing.

• 25:01Tig Notaro?

  It's exactly the same.

• 25:04Tig Notaro?

  All right. Well, um, I, I think that's it for this, uh, pretty little episode.

• 25:09Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, this was fun chatting with you.

• 25:12Tig Notaro?

  And yeah, just, uh, make sure you submit your question to speakpipe.com/handsomepod.

• 25:20Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, ask us a question.

• 25:22Tig Notaro?

  Yeah, ask us a question. We can't wait to hear from you. And, uh, until next time, huh? Keep it pretty handsome.

• 25:35Mae Martin?

  Handsome is hosted by me, Mae Martin, Tig Notaro, and Fortune Feimster. The show is produced, recorded, and edited by Thomas Willett. Email us at [email protected] and please follow us on social media at HandsomePod.

• 25:51Fortune Feimster?

  What a podcast!

• 25:57Speaker 02

  That was a HeadGum Podcast.

• 26:00Mae Martin?

  Checking Allstate first could save you hundreds on car insurance. Not checking whether I have enough tickets before getting in line for a ride at the fair? Tilt a whoopsie. I waited in line for so long, only to be turned away at the gate. Maybe I'll have more luck whacking a mole.

• 26:14Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, checking for this handsome. So check Allstate first for an auto quote. It could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate. Potential savings vary, subject to terms, conditions, and availability. Allstate, North American Insurance Company and Affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois.