Follow your Instincts with Henry Winkler

On today’s episode of IMO, Michelle and Craig welcome none other than… The Fonz! Henry Winkler joins to discuss his lifetime journey with dyslexia, growing up in New York, going to therapy, and, yes, his most iconic roles. Plus, Henry shares his thoughts on parenting and being a grandfather. Have a question you want answered? Write to us at imopod.com http://imopod.com. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Michelle Obama?

  So let me tell you who the Fonz was, at least to me.

• 0:02Speaker 01

  I would love to hear it from you.

• 0:04Michelle Obama?

  First of all, sexy. Now, what did I know about?

• 0:07Speaker 01

  I'm sitting differently in my chair right now.

• 0:10Michelle Obama?

  What did I, at that, at the age, and I can't do the math, but I was young, it did something to me. It's like, woo! Yeah, and the Fonz-

• 0:17Speaker 01

  Can I just say something?

• 0:18Michelle Obama?

  What?

• 0:19Speaker 01

  Uh, wait a minute. I just wanna say something. I'm a human being on this earth. I'm an American.

• 0:23Michelle Obama?

  Mm-hmm.

• 0:24Speaker 01

  Um, I've watched you, over all of these years, be this powerful presence in the universe.

• 0:34Speaker 01

  And you're telling me?

• 0:38Speaker 01

  I wanna just say, I don't have to say another word, I can go home now.

• 0:49Michelle Obama?

  This episode is brought to you by Rivian and Progressive Insurance.

• 0:55Craig Robinson?

  Hey.

• 0:56Michelle Obama?

  Craig Robinson.

• 0:57Craig Robinson?

  Michelle Robinson.

• 0:58Michelle Obama?

  So what's the whale for?

• 1:00Craig Robinson?

  This was in your honor. This, you, I'm surprised you don't know what this is.

• 1:04Michelle Obama?

  Okay, tell me.

• 1:05Craig Robinson?

  This is a Vineyard Vines shirt from Martha's Vineyard. And you're trying to get me to be a Vineyard guy, and I'm, I'm trying to embrace it, and you don't even know what this is.

• 1:14Michelle Obama?

  Well, I noticed the whale, and I thought it was very cute, and I thought, oh, he's got a little whale on.

• 1:18Craig Robinson?

  Yes, it is a little sperm whale.

• 1:22Michelle Obama?

  Are you sure it's a sperm whale?

• 1:23Craig Robinson?

  I am, I am.

• 1:24Michelle Obama?

  Okay. You, did you research it?

• 1:25Craig Robinson?

  I did not research it. I can tell what a sperm, you, do you remember back in seventh grade?

• 1:31Michelle Obama?

  That's pretty good, that he can tell what a sperm whale, sperm whale.

• 1:35Craig Robinson?

  I did that report in seventh grade on sharks, whales, and dolphins.

• 1:38Michelle Obama?

  You still remember that? You barely remember anything I tell you.

• 1:41Craig Robinson?

  Uh, but that's 'cause I can remember stuff a long time ago. That's what happens to old people. They remember the old stuff and not the new stuff.

• 1:47Michelle Obama?

  Got it, got it. What else is going on?

• 1:50Craig Robinson?

  Well, uh, so you're, yeah, I understand you're moving the Rivian that we got from-

• 1:55Michelle Obama?

  Martha's Vineyard, too.

• 1:56Craig Robinson?

  Rivian folks.

• 1:57Michelle Obama?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:58Craig Robinson?

  The Rivian folks gifted both of us cars, folks, to drive around in, and it's been fantastic. But my sister's moving her car from the Vineyard.

• 2:07Michelle Obama?

  From the vineyard to DC while we're in DC. Cause we're just in the vineyard for the summer.

• 2:12Craig Robinson?

  Are you gonna try and drive while you're in DC?

• 2:14Michelle Obama?

  No, DC would be a hard place for me to drive. Because I still, I still drive in a motorcade when I do drive. So it's just, the only place you can do that is on a small island when it's quiet, right? So, but I think we're, we're gonna have it there so that when the girls come home to visit, there's a car for them to drive. They complained about that the last time. Cause we realized we don't, we don't have a car.

• 2:39Craig Robinson?

  Yeah.

• 2:39Michelle Obama?

  We didn't have a car until we got these Rivian's.

• 2:43Craig Robinson?

  Yeah, right.

• 2:44Michelle Obama?

  So.

• 2:45Craig Robinson?

  Yeah, well, they're gonna really like this. So there's a really neat feature that I would like to say that I figured out, but it's really Aaron figured out, my youngest.

• 2:54Michelle Obama?

  Yeah, it takes kids to.

• 2:56Craig Robinson?

  It takes kids with all this technology to figure out what's going on.

• 2:59Michelle Obama?

  Tell me, because I'm, I never know what's the feature, all the features. Cause there's so many.

• 3:03Craig Robinson?

  When your car is in park, that big screen that you use for navigation and for all the, the functions of the car, becomes like a television. So he can watch, you know, if he, if he actually logged into our TV network, he can watch whatever he wants to watch at home.

• 3:22Michelle Obama?

  You can get all your streaming apps on, on there too?

• 3:25Craig Robinson?

  Every single thing on there.

• 3:26Michelle Obama?

  That's, sounds dangerous.

• 3:27Craig Robinson?

  It does sound dangerous.

• 3:28Michelle Obama?

  Sounds like Rivian doesn't want you ever to leave the car. Rivian's like, you can live here, get a Rivian, save on rent.

• 3:37Craig Robinson?

  And speaking of rent, you know, I, I mentioned to you, I'm, I'm staying in, in Airbnb again this time around.

• 3:44Michelle Obama?

  First, let's stop on that segue. That was a smooth segue.

• 3:50Craig Robinson?

  What do you say?

• 3:51Michelle Obama?

  Speaking of rent, I'm like, okay, all right.

• 3:57Michelle Obama?

  Okay, speaking of rent, I like that. It was impressive.

• 4:02Craig Robinson?

  Thank you, thank you. Yeah, a compliment from you is.

• 4:06Michelle Obama?

  It's so rare.

• 4:06Craig Robinson?

  So rare. So I'm gonna, I'm gonna savor it right now, just savoring it. But no, uh, you know, we are, with Austin being a sophomore, we're embarking on these college trips now.

• 4:21Michelle Obama?

  Oh, yeah. Are you, have you all started that already?

• 4:24Craig Robinson?

  We did, but it, it's just, I think. Now that we have grown accustomed to the Airbnbs, it's just a much more comfortable way to have a main place to camp out, have meals, do laundry, and then go see schools, you know.

• 4:42Michelle Obama?

  Well, you can definitely, because not all college campuses have great hotel amenities. You know, because sometimes they're in small towns and they're off the beaten path. Anyway, let's not digress. We are.

• 4:58Craig Robinson?

  Yes, you go ahead. We're so excited, we can't even talk.

• 5:03Michelle Obama?

  Our guest today, for Craig and I,

• 5:09Michelle Obama?

  Henry Winkler is a household, he was, we grew up with him.

• 5:14Craig Robinson?

  Yes.

• 5:14Michelle Obama?

  We literally grew up with Happy Days, The Cunninghams, The Fonz. And that was just sort of a part of.

• 5:28Michelle Obama?

  All the spinoffs. That was part of our, that was the wallpaper of our life.

• 5:34Craig Robinson?

  Oh, man.

• 5:36Michelle Obama?

  And to have him here, joining us on IMO, is such a treat.

• 5:41Craig Robinson?

  And we're gonna talk about this when he comes out. But all the way from Happy Days to now, he's an author. And, but I wanna, I mean, he's in a show that I happened upon.

• 5:59Michelle Obama?

  Very. Mm-hmm. Yeah, you've been telling me about that.

• 6:02Craig Robinson?

  I've been telling you about it. And I said to Henry when I met him, I got a chance to meet him and say hello, and I was like fanboying all over the place. But I didn't know he was in it originally. And so I went to watch it, and lo and behold, he's in it. And then I watched all the up, it's like four seasons.

• 6:24Michelle Obama?

  You got hooked.

• 6:26Craig Robinson?

  Often running.

• 6:27Michelle Obama?

  All right, well, I'm looking for, I'm gonna catch up on Barry. Because you've been raving about it.

• 6:31Craig Robinson?

  But let me give him the proper introduction. Henry Winkler has over 50 years, 50, 5-0 years of success in Hollywood. And continues to be in demand.

• 6:46Craig Robinson?

  And not only as an actor and a producer, but as I said, an author. He's is a bestselling author of children's books that are wonderful. His autobiography, Being Henry, The Fonz and Beyond, was a New York Times bestseller for 11 or 10 or 11 weeks there.

• 7:06Craig Robinson?

  And then we just found out he is gonna be celebrating his 80th birthday.

• 7:13Michelle Obama?

  Major milestone.

• 7:14Craig Robinson?

  Major milestone, but.

• 7:17Michelle Obama?

  And he looks just as handsome.

• 7:18Craig Robinson?

  He's, I mean, he looks the same. I mean, I mean, he could have worn a leather jacket here.

• 7:24Michelle Obama?

  We should have asked.

• 7:26Craig Robinson?

  Yeah, well, now, well, let's, let's just stop talking and bring him out. Henry Winkler, please, come on down.

• 7:38Michelle Obama?

  What a handsome man.

• 7:41Craig Robinson?

  So nice to have you here. Oh, my gosh.

• 7:45Speaker 01

  He feels so short.

• 7:48Michelle Obama?

  Yeah, most people don't realize we are a tall people, the Robinsons and Obamas. My husband is tall, of course.

• 7:55Speaker 01

  But I just wanna say, if you grew up with the Fonz, you grew up really good.

• 8:00Michelle Obama?

  I did.

• 8:01Speaker 01

  Yes, you did.

• 8:02Michelle Obama?

  I really did. We, you know, we, we lived a wholesome life and Happy Days and The Fonz were a part of that.

• 8:09Craig Robinson?

  And you, you should know, we were only allowed an hour of TV a day.

• 8:17Craig Robinson?

  So on Thursday night?

• 8:18Speaker 01

  I'm honored. Tuesday night?

• 8:20Craig Robinson?

  Tuesday night?

• 8:20Speaker 01

  Doesn't matter what day, as long as you were there.

• 8:23Michelle Obama?

  That's right.

• 8:23Craig Robinson?

  Tuesday night, our hour was dedicate, half of our hour was dedicated to you.

• 8:28Speaker 01

  Thank you.

• 8:29Michelle Obama?

  Well, thank you for being here.

• 8:31Speaker 01

  Thank you for asking me.

• 8:32Michelle Obama?

  And, and spending your birthday week with us.

• 8:34Speaker 01

  Yes. Well, this is a great way to start on, on my birthday week. Part of the celebration. You said to me, I should celebrate now for the entire year.

• 8:45Michelle Obama?

  That's what, yes.

• 8:46Speaker 01

  This is the kickoff.

• 8:47Michelle Obama?

  Eighty is one of those, that's where you, you deserve a year of celebration.

• 8:51Speaker 01

  I deserve new knees, is what I.

• 8:55Michelle Obama?

  You're moving, you're moving around pretty, pretty well.

• 8:58Speaker 01

  But I get out of the, I get out of bed and I go make a cup of coffee.

• 9:02Craig Robinson?

  Okay.

• 9:02Speaker 01

  And then I have to go back to the bed and invite my knees to come with me. You know, they're still lounging.

• 9:10Craig Robinson?

  Oh, man, that's great.

• 9:12Michelle Obama?

  How are you feeling? I mean, what, what is, what is entering your eighties feeling like for you? Besides waiting for your knees?

• 9:20Speaker 01

  Okay, I'm very grateful. Uh, you know, people keep asking me, am I gonna retire? Or have you retired? And I think that is like the furthest thing from my imagination. I will retire when I am not able to do.

• 9:37Michelle Obama?

  That's right.

• 9:38Speaker 01

  Again, more.

• 9:39Craig Robinson?

  Right.

• 9:40Speaker 01

  Do you know, I just, I think that it is deadly.

• 9:44Craig Robinson?

  Yeah.

• 9:44Michelle Obama?

  Do you get up every day with a schedule? Are you working five days a week?

• 9:49Speaker 01

  I, I work a lot. I have several jobs. I do a wonderful show on the History Channel called Hazardous History.

• 9:58Craig Robinson?

  Yes.

• 9:58Speaker 01

  Which, when they presented it to me, I just loved the facts of it. I thought, this is outrageous. And.

• 10:09Michelle Obama?

  Let's tell the listeners the premise just so that they know, because you just got picked up for a second season.

• 10:14Speaker 01

  Yes, we did. We, we did eight. Uh, it did, it did so nicely because people watched. We were now picked up for thirty.

• 10:22Michelle Obama?

  Yeah.

• 10:23Speaker 01

  And, okay, so here is the premise, I hope it's not a, a sponsor. 7-Up.

• 10:31Michelle Obama?

  Mm-hmm.

• 10:32Speaker 01

  1927.

• 10:33Craig Robinson?

  Yep.

• 10:34Speaker 01

  Bubbly, citrusy.

• 10:36Michelle Obama?

  Yeah.

• 10:36Speaker 01

  And the.

• 10:37Michelle Obama?

  Refreshing, supposedly.

• 10:39Speaker 01

  And the, the tagline was, "We will take the edge off." Because it was laced with lithium.

• 10:46Michelle Obama?

  Oh, God.

• 10:46Craig Robinson?

  Oh, no.

• 10:47Speaker 01

  So, just one fact of what we did, either to make money or thinking we're helping human beings.

• 10:55Michelle Obama?

  Take the edge off with a little crack.

• 10:57Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 11:00Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 11:00Michelle Obama?

  And that was legal.

• 11:01Speaker 01

  And that was at that time legal.

• 11:03Michelle Obama?

  So you, so you got hazardous history.

• 11:06Speaker 01

  Right.

• 11:06Michelle Obama?

  So you're still working a lot.

• 11:07Speaker 01

  Our newest children's book came out on September 30th.

• 11:11Michelle Obama?

  Is this your 40th?

• 11:12Speaker 01

  This is the 40th.

• 11:13Michelle Obama?

  The 40th children's book.

• 11:15Speaker 01

  Right. Now, here's something. I did not know I could do this.

• 11:20Michelle Obama?

  Yeah.

• 11:20Speaker 01

  And what I learned was that there's more than one way to do anything. I have a wonderful partner, Lynn Oliver.

• 11:28Michelle Obama?

  Yeah.

• 11:29Speaker 01

  She types, I talk. Then she has an idea, I wait, she types. Then she reads it to me and we argue over every word. And since 2003, we have 40 children's books. The newest one is Detective Duck. This little duckling who dreams about being a detective. And she's an environmentalist.

• 11:52Michelle Obama?

  And she, it's, she's a she.

• 11:53Speaker 01

  She's a she.

• 11:54Michelle Obama?

  I love it. I love it.

• 11:56Speaker 01

  And powerful.

• 11:57Michelle Obama?

  What age group are you targeting?

• 11:59Speaker 01

  This is for emerging readers.

• 12:01Michelle Obama?

  Oh, yeah.

• 12:01Speaker 01

  So I would say 5, 6, 7. Then the next series is 7, 8. And then we have 4th grade to 7th grade.

• 12:13Michelle Obama?

  Wow. Well, congratulations. And, you know, let's, just to put that in context, when you talk about that you were doing something that you never thought you could do.

• 12:23Speaker 01

  Right.

• 12:24Michelle Obama?

  And that is writing because you-

• 12:26Speaker 01

  Or reading.

• 12:26Michelle Obama?

  And reading because, can, please share with our, our listeners.

• 12:31Speaker 01

  Okay, so I talked about this-

• 12:32Michelle Obama?

  Yeah.

• 12:33Speaker 01

  Like until the cows come home, but I am dyslexic. And I could not read. I read my first book at 31 because I said, "I have to, I have to read a novel like everybody else on the earth."

• 12:45Michelle Obama?

  Right.

• 12:46Speaker 01

  And you find out, and I tell children, every child I meet, whether they want to hear it or not, how you learn has nothing to do with how brilliant you are.

• 12:58Michelle Obama?

  Yes.

• 13:00Speaker 01

  There are so many dyslexic human beings on this earth. One out of five children have some sort of learning challenge that are doctors and dancers and plumbers and everything.

• 13:13Michelle Obama?

  Yeah, well, tell us about little Henry Winkler. I mean, your parents, tell us about their background, where you grew up, what, you know, what life was like for you.

• 13:26Speaker 01

  We lived above our means. We had an apartment in New York City.

• 13:33Michelle Obama?

  What part of New York?

• 13:34Speaker 01

  Seventy-eighth and Broadway. I went to PS eighty-seven, right down the block. The little boy that I wrote about first, Hank Zipser, went to PS eighty-seven, lived in my apartment.

• 13:46Michelle Obama?

  Did you, did you feel accepted? Did you, did you feel like a part of that community?

• 13:53Speaker 01

  That is a great question. I never felt accepted, but also, part of it must be the learning challenge, and part of it must be my delayed emotionality, which I now know is true, because I had to protect myself, because every time I left my bedroom with a smile. Thinking, hey, okay, let's be today. I was in a war zone.

• 14:20Michelle Obama?

  Yeah.

• 14:22Speaker 01

  I was yelled at for something that I wasn't even, I had no idea what I did.

• 14:27Craig Robinson?

  Yeah.

• 14:27Speaker 01

  And, and I'm not saying, oh my God, woe is me, because I'm having a pretty great life. I'm just saying, this was the way it was. So I stayed in my room and pretended I was Paul Anka.

• 14:40Michelle Obama?

  Paul Anka, okay.

• 14:41Speaker 01

  Rubber bands around pencils, and I sang, put your head on my shoulder, I lip synced it, you know, and of course, gave a lot of speeches as I won Academy Awards.

• 14:55Michelle Obama?

  So you had.

• 14:56Craig Robinson?

  So you knew you were gonna be an actor.

• 14:57Speaker 01

  I wanted it so badly, I could taste it.

• 15:01Michelle Obama?

  Did you articulate, did you tell your?

• 15:03Speaker 01

  Every minute of every day.

• 15:05Michelle Obama?

  And what did your, your parents say?

• 15:07Speaker 01

  Why do you think I bought my business over here? And I said, besides being chased by the Nazis, Dad, was there like a bigger reason than that? He wanted me to take over the family business, buying and selling wood. He wanted me to buy and sell mahogany. The only wood I was interested was hollywood. And I was told I would never get there.

• 15:31Michelle Obama?

  Wow, wow. So how did you?

• 15:34Speaker 01

  But I'm here.

• 15:34Michelle Obama?

  You are.

• 15:35Speaker 01

  Sitting at this table.

• 15:36Michelle Obama?

  How did you keep your dreams alive through all of that?

• 15:39Speaker 01

  That is a good question. I'm not sure. All I know is, I just kept it. I kept the fires burning. Somehow, I, I found enough wood to keep that fire burning.

• 15:59Craig Robinson?

  This segment is brought to you by Progressive Insurance, a brand that believes homeownership is more than just a place to live. It's about fulfilling your dreams, unlocking a future full of possibility, and building the life you've always imagined. So what was the most exciting thing for you about buying your first home?

• 16:22Michelle Obama?

  You know, I think it was the fact that we could do it, you know?

• 16:25Craig Robinson?

  Right.

• 16:27Michelle Obama?

  I remember it fondly, right after we got married. Barack and I fortunately were in a position where we had enough money saved where we could buy our first condo. And I think the process of looking for it, you know, going from house to house, I, I hadn't even really. Lived on my own until then because I lived above mom and dad's house in the rental above the house. So I hadn't, I had never gone house hunting. And that process was, was a lot of fun. And I did it with Barack. We were newlyweds. It was exciting. It felt

• 17:10Michelle Obama?

  like the beginning of the future. So, yeah.

• 17:13Craig Robinson?

  And, and do you remember the, the highlight of when you found the con, that first condo?

• 17:20Michelle Obama?

  Well, we started narrowing down. We were looking in Hyde Park. We knew, we knew the neighborhood in Chicago that we wanted to live. And so as we looked, we were able to narrow down to a specific development that we really loved. We saw a couple of units in that development. It was called Eastview Park and it was right off of the lake. And after a couple of outings, we decided, you know, this area, because it was enclosed, it was private, there was a private, you know, driveway area. So it felt quiet, but it was still a series of apartments. We could imagine the girls playing out in the yard and the children, because then we didn't know we were going to have girls, but we knew we wanted to have a family.

• 18:05Craig Robinson?

  Right.

• 18:05Michelle Obama?

  So, yeah, we were able to narrow it down to that unit. And then we started really asking our Realtor to find really good places in that unit. And we saw two.

• 18:16Craig Robinson?

  Okay.

• 18:16Michelle Obama?

  And we narrowed it down to the one that we have. And the big exciting part about that was, it was really right down the street from where you lived.

• 18:27Craig Robinson?

  Four houses down.

• 18:28Michelle Obama?

  Four houses down.

• 18:29Craig Robinson?

  Four apartments down. And it, it reminds me of what I found exciting about our first place was very similar. Just the fact that you're looking for a place to live. But I remember our place, if you remember, it was a duplex condo and it had the spiral staircase to go down to the family room.

• 18:49Michelle Obama?

  I remember going to visit that before, because I went to one of the, when you guys were closing in, you Brought, I think, me and mom to come see it.

• 18:57Craig Robinson?

  Yes, that's right.

• 18:58Michelle Obama?

  And I thought that duplex piece was very sophisticated, yes.

• 19:01Craig Robinson?

  It was very sophisticated and it was really neat having that feeling of of homeownership, you know, and buying your first home gives you the freedom and control to build the life you've always imagined. And Progressive is here to support that journey every step of the way. Owning a home isn't just a financial milestone, it's the confidence that comes from achieving a lifelong goal and the freedom to build the life you've always imagined. Progressive supports first time home buyers by helping them attain their first home and navigate the journey with online tools and resources as well as financial support.

• 19:44Craig Robinson?

  Through a $7 million commitment toward housing initiatives in 2024, Progressive empowers people to turn a house into a home, one that reflects who they are and what they hope to achieve. Explore more tools, resources, and guidance at progressive.com slash open the house to see how first time homeowners can find support along the way.

• 20:15Michelle Obama?

  That reminded me a lot of what our mom used to say is that you have to treat every child as an individual. She used she used to say that and she said, you know, I'm not raising children, I'm raising people. And so.

• 20:32Speaker 01

  Just that phrase alone.

• 20:33Michelle Obama?

  Yeah.

• 20:34Speaker 01

  Is the beginning and the end.

• 20:35Michelle Obama?

  Yeah.

• 20:36Speaker 01

  If you look at it that you're not raising children, you're raising people.

• 20:40Michelle Obama?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 20:41Speaker 01

  It will completely change the way you approach.

• 20:44Michelle Obama?

  Exactly.

• 20:44Speaker 01

  That job.

• 20:45Michelle Obama?

  Exactly. And having a philosophy of parenting.

• 20:48Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 20:48Michelle Obama?

  Is important. I mean, yeah, we live in a society, people, you know, they people want folks to procreate. They want to stop people. They want to take choice away because they want us to be parents and and and bring forth life. But rarely do we have conversations of about what it means to be a parent.

• 21:08Speaker 01

  Right.

• 21:08Michelle Obama?

  Why do you want to be a parent? Because you have to know your own motivations for why you're bringing life into this world.

• 21:16Speaker 01

  I think that is probably rare.

• 21:18Michelle Obama?

  Yeah.

• 21:19Speaker 01

  I actually, I've never considered that.

• 21:22Michelle Obama?

  Yeah.

• 21:24Speaker 01

  I just did, you know, because it just seemed like the right

• 21:28Michelle Obama?

  Right thing to do.

• 21:29Speaker 01

  to do. I never looked at it in that way before. And I never heard other people say that before, really. Why am I a parent? Why am I doing this?

• 21:40Michelle Obama?

  It becomes a thing you want.

• 21:43Speaker 01

  And then love.

• 21:44Michelle Obama?

  And, right. You want, and, and your philosophy of parenting changes based on your reason. If you're having a child because you want to be loved, well, now you're looking for a friend. You're looking for this baby to be something for you.

• 21:59Speaker 01

  Right.

• 22:00Michelle Obama?

  If you are looking for somebody to live out your dreams,

• 22:03Speaker 01

  Right.

• 22:03Michelle Obama?

  to be what you weren't. Now that means that you are not going to see who this child is because you already have a sense of what you want them to be.

• 22:12Speaker 01

  Right, other than who they are.

• 22:14Michelle Obama?

  You're not going to leave them any room because you need them. As your father, I wanted you to run the business.

• 22:19Speaker 01

  Right.

• 22:20Michelle Obama?

  Well, he had made up that, his,

• 22:21Speaker 01

  That's right.

• 22:22Michelle Obama?

  His decision up before he even got to see who you would be.

• 22:26Speaker 01

  Right. And I don't even know how the decision of what I wanted came to me. I always say that it was just a thing I needed to do. I don't know why.

• 22:40Michelle Obama?

  Well, because kids are snowflakes. They all, we're, we're all grains of sand.

• 22:44Speaker 01

  Right.

• 22:45Michelle Obama?

  And we come here with, I think, a certain level of temperament built in

• 22:51Speaker 01

  Right.

• 22:51Michelle Obama?

  to our DNA.

• 22:52Speaker 01

  Right.

• 22:53Michelle Obama?

  Because I, we, I think if everybody looks inside, we figure out, well, how did I, how was I that person? How did I know as a kid to be that? How did I know?

• 23:02Speaker 01

  How did a person grow up and invent corduroy? How did they know?

• 23:06Michelle Obama?

  That's right. That's right. And they might have been thinking as a three-year-old, corduroy is my thing. And I don't know where it came from, but I'm,

• 23:13Speaker 01

  And it feels good.

• 23:14Michelle Obama?

  It feels so good.

• 23:15Speaker 01

  Yeah, I like to wear it inside out.

• 23:19Michelle Obama?

  But if you have more than one kid, you realize that they are different.

• 23:24Speaker 01

  From different planets.

• 23:25Michelle Obama?

  Craig and I, we were raised in the same household.

• 23:28Speaker 01

  Right.

• 23:28Michelle Obama?

  From the same parents, same set of experiences. He's a boy, I'm a girl. We are very different people. And our parents would say that was apparent the minute we could come, even before we could communicate. But if you're not looking for that difference, if you're not looking to understand your baby.

• 23:49Speaker 01

  Right.

• 23:49Michelle Obama?

  To understand that part of parenting is that you have to be listening to them and watching them because they are telling you who they are.

• 23:57Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 23:58Michelle Obama?

  Very early on, which is why you knew. Because you came into this world, I believe, as an actor, as a creative, as a, and maybe that's why your learning is different, right?

• 24:11Speaker 01

  My learning is through my ear.

• 24:12Michelle Obama?

  Yeah.

• 24:13Speaker 01

  So when you say listening.

• 24:14Michelle Obama?

  Yeah.

• 24:15Speaker 01

  I, I, I have to listen because that's how I learn. And reading is so difficult even now because you don't lose your dyslexia. You just learn to negotiate.

• 24:26Craig Robinson?

  Yeah, yeah. It's, and it's fascinating that you developed into an actor where you have to read.

• 24:33Speaker 01

  Oh, I chose a profession.

• 24:35Michelle Obama?

  Yeah, how did you do that?

• 24:36Speaker 01

  You know what? When, there's a will, there's a way.

• 24:39Michelle Obama?

  Yeah.

• 24:40Speaker 01

  You want it bad enough, you figure it out. I write it over and over and I, when I get a script. Now, if I do one script, I must read it and read it and read it, underline it in yellow, let it go in. When I'm doing a series, it's like you're, you're working a muscle.

• 25:00Michelle Obama?

  Yeah.

• 25:00Speaker 01

  All of a sudden, by the 11th show, I can rub the script on my body and it goes in.

• 25:07Craig Robinson?

  Hmm.

• 25:09Speaker 01

  You know, it, oh, it's an amazing process.

• 25:11Craig Robinson?

  So you're, you're, so the Fonz role, let's talk about that.

• 25:14Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 25:15Craig Robinson?

  Because that, that was.

• 25:16Speaker 01

  It changed my life.

• 25:17Craig Robinson?

  It changed your life.

• 25:18Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 25:19Craig Robinson?

  Changed our lives.

• 25:20Speaker 01

  Thank you.

• 25:21Craig Robinson?

  But it, it really did. So you're, you're, let's go before you get that role. You're, how did it come about that you auditioned for that? And then?

• 25:31Michelle Obama?

  And were you acting before? Did you start in high school?

• 25:34Speaker 01

  I was in New York City. I went to, I have a master's degree in acting. I don't know where I got the nerve, but I applied to, with, with, I've got into one college out of 28. I'm in the bottom 3% academically. I applied to the Yale School of Drama. I just thought it was really important to know as much as I could so that I had some kind of foundation.

• 26:01Speaker 01

  I stayed for a year and a half in the repertory theater. I got $172 a week. I'm a professional. Went to New York, couldn't get hired, did commercials.

• 26:13Craig Robinson?

  Okay.

• 26:14Speaker 01

  For supermarkets, Sanka Coffee, American Airlines. And then I did The Lords of Flapbush. And then somebody said, you wanna be known to New York? Stay here. You wanna be known to the world? Go to California.

• 26:33Speaker 01

  Big decision.

• 26:36Speaker 01

  Went to California. Second audition.

• 26:39Michelle Obama?

  How old were you?

• 26:40Speaker 01

  Now, I am, um, I am, in 19, it's 1973. I landed Terrafirma, California, September 18th. My birthday is October 30th. I have no idea how old I am.

• 26:57Michelle Obama?

  I know, right? It's like, Craig, you're the math guy.

• 27:00Speaker 01

  No!

• 27:01Michelle Obama?

  Or it's someone with math.

• 27:03Speaker 01

  No, somebody will tell me. Somebody is gonna write in. They're gonna write in and you're gonna know in a couple of weeks. You're gonna get the mail.

• 27:13Michelle Obama?

  You were in your twenties.

• 27:14Speaker 01

  All right, 27.

• 27:15Michelle Obama?

  Okay, let's just say that.

• 27:18Speaker 01

  I said, well, you know, I can't go and I can't be in a series because I was trained for the theater. And Joan Scott said, would you just go? Okay. I drive to Paramount in my rented Capri. It's green because I love green. It's like a little sports car. I walk in the room. Everybody is famous. I've seen them all on TV. Wow. My heart sunk. Now it's my turn. I go in. My hair is down to my shoulders. I have a sweat stain that looks like the Hudson River is under my arms.

• 28:00Speaker 01

  And I see the man, Pasquale. He's going to read with me. He's going to read the other role. I only have six lines. And I don't know where it came from, but here is another lesson I learned. Go with your imagination, whoever is listening to us right now. Go with your imagination. I looked at Pasquale and I said, hey, don't look at me like that. I changed my voice. I'm looking at him. I'm a scared, short Jew. I'm playing a tall Italian. I see the script up in the air. I walked out of the room on my birthday, October 30th, 1973. Tom Miller calls me, one of the producers from Milwaukee.

• 28:44Speaker 01

  It was set in Milwaukee because of Tom Miller. And he said, would you like to be part of the show? I said, if you let me show the emotional side to this guy. When he takes off his jacket, who does he have to be cool for? They said, yes. I said, yes.

• 29:00Michelle Obama?

  Wow, wow. The Fonz was born.

• 29:04Speaker 01

  The Fonz was born.

• 29:05Michelle Obama?

  So you were nothing like the Fonz.

• 29:07Speaker 01

  I am nothing like the Fonz. I met people like the Fonz at school dances. And I immediately became blind. And I said, I hear you. You sound so tough, I cannot see you. I'm just going to feel my way right out the door.

• 29:30Speaker 01

  Please.

• 29:33Speaker 01

  Whoa.

• 29:34Michelle Obama?

  Well, but for listeners, people, because now generationally, we can't assume everybody knows what Happy Days is.

• 29:40Speaker 01

  No.

• 29:40Michelle Obama?

  And the Fonz.

• 29:41Speaker 01

  Fifty years old.

• 29:41Michelle Obama?

  So let me tell you who the Fonz was, at least to me.

• 29:44Speaker 01

  I would love to hear it from you.

• 29:46Michelle Obama?

  First of all, sexy. Now, what did I know about?

• 29:48Speaker 01

  I'm sitting differently in my chair right now.

• 29:51Michelle Obama?

  What did I, at that, at the age, and I can't do the math, but I was young, right? I was under 10, right? To think, okay.

• 29:57Craig Robinson?

  You were 11.

• 29:58Michelle Obama?

  11, all right.

• 30:00Craig Robinson?

  No, no, no, yes.

• 30:02Michelle Obama?

  So I was young.

• 30:02Craig Robinson?

  Nine.

• 30:03Michelle Obama?

  I was young, preteen. And I saw on the screen, the coolest. You did, you read tall.

• 30:11Speaker 01

  I did.

• 30:12Michelle Obama?

  You read.

• 30:13Speaker 01

  People said, oh, my God, I thought you were taller.

• 30:15Michelle Obama?

  Six three, yeah.

• 30:16Speaker 01

  It's so true.

• 30:16Michelle Obama?

  You read 6'3". Think, and even cooler version of John Travolta, right? Black, jet black. Before John Travolta. Thick, black, luscious, Italian hair. Who knew, right?

• 30:33Speaker 01

  I had it imported from Milan.

• 30:36Michelle Obama?

  Slicked back, right? So the Fonz is on his bike, black leather jacket, gray t-shirt underneath.

• 30:43Craig Robinson?

  White t-shirt.

• 30:43Michelle Obama?

  White, gray.

• 30:44Craig Robinson?

  Yeah.

• 30:45Speaker 01

  It's close.

• 30:46Michelle Obama?

  Cool. Just leaning up, because even before you had the black jacket, at one point, you changed to that tacky jacket.

• 30:54Speaker 01

  No, that was the first jacket.

• 30:55Michelle Obama?

  That was the first jacket.

• 30:56Speaker 01

  You were right. Very hard to be cool in cloth.

• 30:58Michelle Obama?

  In cloth, which, did you make that change?

• 31:02Speaker 01

  No, no, no. Gary Marshall went to ABC. And with the network, we were in, the network was in the bottom. It was the third network. There were only three at that time in, on television. And he said, you know, he could be very hurt if he rides his bike and he knocks over in cloth.

• 31:21Michelle Obama?

  In cloth.

• 31:22Speaker 01

  They said, when he's in a scene with his bike, he can wear leather.

• 31:26Michelle Obama?

  He's got that black leather, and I remember that change.

• 31:29Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 31:30Michelle Obama?

  Because I think it did something to me. It's like, woo!

• 31:34Speaker 01

  Can I just say something?

• 31:36Michelle Obama?

  What?

• 31:36Speaker 01

  Wait a minute. I just want to say something. I'm a human being on this earth. I'm an American. I've watched you over all of these years, you know, be who you are, be this powerful presence in the universe.

• 31:55Speaker 01

  And you're telling me?

• 31:58Speaker 01

  I wanna just say, I don't have to say another word. I can go home now.

• 32:03Craig Robinson?

  Wait till Stacy hears this.

• 32:05Speaker 01

  I don't care. I'm gonna play it for her. Just that segment. Okay, I'm sorry.

• 32:14Michelle Obama?

  But Fonz was also, not only was he handsome, but he was the strong, silent type.

• 32:20Speaker 01

  You just said was.

• 32:22Michelle Obama?

  Well, we're talking about the Fonz.

• 32:23Speaker 01

  Oh, yes, right, of course.

• 32:24Michelle Obama?

  Right. Henry Winkler continues to be, I told you when you walked out.

• 32:28Speaker 01

  Yes, you did.

• 32:28Michelle Obama?

  Very cute.

• 32:29Speaker 01

  Yes, you did.

• 32:29Michelle Obama?

  Very cute.

• 32:30Speaker 01

  Yes, you did.

• 32:31Michelle Obama?

  Yes, I did, and I meant it.

• 32:34Michelle Obama?

  But the strong, the character type, which was, he didn't say much.

• 32:39Speaker 01

  Right.

• 32:39Michelle Obama?

  Until he said something.

• 32:40Speaker 01

  That's right.

• 32:41Michelle Obama?

  He was usually the moral order of Happy Days. The sort of, you know, sock hoppy kind of, wasn't the bully.

• 32:49Speaker 01

  He was who I dreamt of being.

• 32:52Michelle Obama?

  But everybody was terrified of him. And, but he had a heart of gold.

• 32:57Speaker 01

  Yeah, right.

• 32:58Michelle Obama?

  And you slowly got to see that part of him.

• 33:01Speaker 01

  Right.

• 33:01Michelle Obama?

  So Fonz became, was really the heart of Happy Days. You know, in a very interesting way. So that's just the explanation of how powerful your character and how, how well you embodied that. Because it was sexy, cool, good-hearted.

• 33:19Speaker 01

  Good-hearted.

• 33:19Michelle Obama?

  Tough guy.

• 33:20Speaker 01

  And loyal.

• 33:21Michelle Obama?

  And loyal, loyal to a fault.

• 33:23Speaker 01

  I loved my friends. I loved the Cunninghams. They were the family I did not have in that mythical place.

• 33:39Craig Robinson?

  Craig Robinson here. And as the holiday season comes closer, it's time to plan our holiday travel. And you know, As our family gets older, it makes it harder for all of us to cram into one hotel room for an extended period of time. So we have six or seven adult-sized people traveling simultaneously now that the kids are getting older. So we need a little more space. We need a little more freedom. That's why booking a stay on Airbnb makes so much sense for our family. You know, imagine heading to South Carolina with friends for a cozy fall

• 34:19Craig Robinson?

  weekend, or taking the family to Orlando over the Thanksgiving break. Instead of being stuck in a hotel lobby or eating takeout food on the bed, which can be kind of fun, you've got a living room to gather in, a kitchen to cook these great holiday meals and make memories. You even could cook out outside, which I love doing in the fall weather. It makes the trip feel warmer, more personal, and way more memorable. It's those little things, more space, more privacy, and staying in the coolest parts of town that make an Airbnb trip better than a hotel.

• 35:00Craig Robinson?

  Welcome back to IMO. We made it, folks. It's December. The holiday hustle's just starting to wind down, which means it's a perfect time to switch into new year, new moves mode. What's one big move you want to make in the new year? Whatever those big moves are, you need a plan. You need a strategy. You need a partner. You need Shopify. The end of the year is when you review your yearly numbers, clean up your strategies, and lay the foundation for what's next. They help you plan, launch, and grow so that the start of 2026 is way ahead of the game. With Shopify, you can keep track of everything from the palm of

• 35:44Craig Robinson?

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• 36:30Craig Robinson?

  We here at IMO are big believers that people never stop growing, that we're all in a state of continual becoming, so much so that Michelle even wrote a book about it. Because you are not one thing, you are all the things, constantly growing and changing into the next version of you. And every day and in every stage of your life, you're only getting stronger, bolder, more confident than you were yesterday. That's why Desert Tone Diamonds are the perfect way of celebrating all that you are and all that you are still becoming. They come in a range of unique, unexpected colors, colors that reflect your unique and unexpected journey. Warm whites, pale champagnes, deep ambers, smoky whiskeys,

• 37:14Craig Robinson?

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• 37:39Craig Robinson?

  Now, I think I know the answer to this, but I want to ask you, did being the Fonz change Henry at all?

• 37:47Speaker 01

  No, he did while I was playing him.

• 37:52Craig Robinson?

  Okay.

• 37:54Speaker 01

  I had to, I couldn't believe that people were actually talking to me because I was still Henry with a very low self-esteem. So, I couldn't, I liked what they were saying, but it went through me because it couldn't be me.

• 38:13Craig Robinson?

  So it couldn't help uplift that feeling that your parents had started.

• 38:17Speaker 01

  When I lived my life, I was still that Henry walking around. Until lately, about 10 years ago, I was so confused, I met a therapist. Who if I were to give a gift to, I would have to give her a skyscraper.

• 38:39Michelle Obama?

  Yeah.

• 38:40Speaker 01

  Because I was a block of Swiss cheese, growing up. And I wanted, I knew I wanted to fill in the holes. And I want to become a block of cheddar.

• 38:52Michelle Obama?

  Yeah, yeah. What did she, how did she do it?

• 38:57Speaker 01

  The woman says nothing. The woman says nothing. She sits there and I say, "Hey, what about this?" And she said, "Yes."

• 39:09Michelle Obama?

  Yes.

• 39:09Speaker 01

  "What about that?" "What do you mean?" "I'm not, don't ask me." And then she forces you to look at you. And you know what? All of a sudden, it's not so difficult. It's okay. And I have become strung. I don't know that you brought up Barry.

• 39:30Craig Robinson?

  Yes.

• 39:31Speaker 01

  I don't know that I could have played Jean Cusinow without going through that process.

• 39:38Michelle Obama?

  What led you finally, 10 years ago, to do therapy?

• 39:42Speaker 01

  I was completely discombobulated. I just, I, instead of walking a straight line, I was psychologically drunk. I think I was emotionally drunk. And I don't even drink.

• 40:00Craig Robinson?

  Yeah.

• 40:01Speaker 01

  And I'm telling you, you don't, she asked me a question. In our very first session, she said, "Where are you?" I had no idea what she meant. "What do you mean, where am I?" "I'm sitting here in this chair." "That's wicker and not that comfortable."

• 40:22Michelle Obama?

  By the way. Hello, Wicker.

• 40:24Speaker 01

  You can put like a cushion.

• 40:25Michelle Obama?

  I know, it's the therapy. Where was the couch? Where was the leather couch?

• 40:32Speaker 01

  And all of a sudden, I started to answer that question. Over the years, it takes time. You have to really devote time. But it is the greatest time I've spent outside of my children and my grandchildren.

• 40:49Michelle Obama?

  Well, how did, how did therapy, this discovery, the filling up the Swiss cheese holes, creating your block of cheddar? How did it manifest itself?

• 41:00Speaker 01

  I will tell you. I think the, I mean, I really do have that answer because I enjoy it so much.

• 41:09Speaker 01

  I'm able to say what I want to say. I'm able to say, I really need this. I really want this. I'm not okay with that. I am perfectly okay with that.

• 41:27Speaker 01

  As opposed to dance around in some sort of crazy chicken dance. You know?

• 41:37Michelle Obama?

  Asking for you, for what you want in life.

• 41:40Speaker 01

  Yes, taking my place on my place on this earth.

• 41:49Michelle Obama?

  Not having those tools most of your life, but still building a very long and very successful career. I mean, there was The Fonz, but, and how many seasons?

• 42:02Speaker 01

  Eleven.

• 42:03Michelle Obama?

  Eleven. No one has 11 seasons anymore. So you spent the bulk of your adult acting life in one of the most successful shows ever.

• 42:13Speaker 01

  Right.

• 42:14Michelle Obama?

  Playing one of the most successful characters ever.

• 42:17Speaker 01

  I am so grateful.

• 42:18Michelle Obama?

  And then you go on to produce, direct, continue to act.

• 42:22Speaker 01

  Produce because I couldn't get hired.

• 42:24Michelle Obama?

  Yeah.

• 42:25Speaker 01

  Produce because people said, oh, my God, he is so funny. He's so lovely, but he was The Fonz. He's The Fonz.

• 42:31Michelle Obama?

  But there wasn't a struggle in those roles of creation to ask for what you wanted?

• 42:37Speaker 01

  Always.

• 42:38Michelle Obama?

  How did that?

• 42:39Speaker 01

  Until about fifteen minutes ago. I'm not kidding.

• 42:43Michelle Obama?

  What did that look like for you to run something? Would you second guess yourself?

• 42:48Speaker 01

  I would. This is what I will tell anybody over and over again. Your mind, as educated or not as you are, your mind only knows a little. Your tummy knows everything. When you listen to your instinct, you're always in the right place.

• 43:05Michelle Obama?

  I love that.

• 43:07Speaker 01

  Whether you're at a job interview or you're gonna date somebody for the first time, you get a bad feeling, you go home. You give the flowers back and walk back in the apartment. You know what I mean? Thank you so much. Enjoy your dinner.

• 43:21Michelle Obama?

  Yeah, yeah. So you operated on instincts. You had to learn how to trust your tummy, as you say. Yeah, yeah.

• 43:29Speaker 01

  You know, my tummy. And I tell that to everybody who will listen.

• 43:35Michelle Obama?

  We're taught the opposite. Think.

• 43:38Speaker 01

  That's right.

• 43:38Michelle Obama?

  You have to use your logic. There's an answer. There's an algorithm. There's a but.

• 43:44Speaker 01

  But when you cannot come up with it, you let it justate. And then it comes up in your mind, like the magic eight ball. An answer comes and then your tummy knows if... Is that answer right? It's an answer, but I'm not feeling it. Reason it took me so long to say "it," right? Because I was suppressing a burp. I just want you to know. That's a natural thing.

• 44:16Michelle Obama?

  Oh, okay, just in real life.

• 44:17Speaker 01

  Just now, in real life. I was just suppressing.

• 44:19Michelle Obama?

  I was thinking, I thought that was a metaphor for something.

• 44:22Speaker 01

  No, no, no, I did not finish the sentence because I was working so hard not to burp. You can't burp in front of the jacket.

• 44:30Michelle Obama?

  It's true. I was like, this is so deep. He's going deep. And it's like, oh, he's trying not to burp. Thank you. Thank you, Henry. Thank you for that. Thank you for that. I am fascinated with...

• 44:45Michelle Obama?

  How you've worked to be a different parent. And, and you are now a different grandparent.

• 44:53Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 44:54Michelle Obama?

  And I think, I, I would love for you to share that journey. Because there are a lot of people who grow up in tough circumstances. They were mis-parented. They didn't know, they were un-parented.

• 45:06Speaker 01

  So you know how that feels.

• 45:08Michelle Obama?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 45:09Speaker 01

  Right? One knows how that feels.

• 45:10Michelle Obama?

  Yes.

• 45:12Speaker 01

  So I said that I learned through my ears. So listening, because our children, if you give them a little bit and you say, you know what? I think you're gonna help figure out what the, the punishment or the consequence is gonna be for what you just did.

• 45:31Speaker 01

  Or, you're gonna figure out what your curfew is. Yeah, I can't live with that. Oh, I can live with that. Okay. And if you don't call, if you're gonna be late, you lose 10 minutes. My daughter, Zoe, went out at 8:00. She was back at 8:20. She lost all of her Saturday night.

• 45:55Speaker 01

  That poor girl got dressed to go nowhere.

• 46:00Speaker 01

  But it was her own doing. Oh, my gosh. Hey, I told you. All you gotta do, very few rules.

• 46:07Michelle Obama?

  Yeah. I, again, I think that we were lucky in that we had a mother that was highly adaptable. And it, it changed the way I parented. You know, it was really, you know, you, you realize that you have to, even punishments. You know, how you solve problems between one child and the next, you know?

• 46:29Speaker 01

  One child will listen. The other child doesn't care?

• 46:32Michelle Obama?

  That's exactly right.

• 46:33Speaker 01

  Oh, my goodness.

• 46:34Michelle Obama?

  I tell this story all the time about Malia and Sasha when they were, they were probably seven and, and three at the time. And Barack was traveling. So I was at home trying to get the girls to bed. They were, they were great kids, but this was one night that they were just being rambunctious and I was like, get ready, it's time to take your baths. And no one was listening and I was in my frustrated mommy time. And I said, well, that's it. You know, no one listens to me. I'm done parenting. You, you seem like you guys have this all figured out and you can do this on your own. So have at it. My oldest daughter, Malia, said, oh, no, mommy. You know, I could, I can't do without you.

• 47:19Michelle Obama?

  And this is what I'm thinking, yeah, this is what I wanted. I wanted her to realize that she needed me. She said, so she immediately started taking off her clothes and it's like, mommy, no, I don't know what I could do without you. Sasha, my three-year-old, was sitting on the stairs watching all this. She took her blankie and she turned around and went back upstairs to watch TV. As if to say, like, thank God. At last, this is what I wanted from you, lady. I am three, I can handle this. I'm going back upstairs. And she got five steps up and I was like, if you don't turn around and get back down here. And I was like, well, it worked for one, didn't work for the other.

• 47:58Speaker 01

  Now, let me ask you a question. Are those characteristics in those young ladies now?

• 48:03Michelle Obama?

  Yes.

• 48:03Speaker 01

  Exactly who they were?

• 48:04Michelle Obama?

  Yes, they have to. My younger daughter has, she wants to learn her way. You know, she, she, she doesn't want to be told

• 48:15Speaker 01

  Right.

• 48:15Michelle Obama?

  That this is how you do it. We tell her, but she's got to learn on her own.

• 48:20Speaker 01

  We have seven grandchildren. They are from 16 to nine months, completely different human beings. One is a dancer, one is in the theater, one is a mathematician. One of them wants to be an athlete and is on his way. The little, um, uh, three-year-old is enchanting. Knows that she walks through the world and moves air. You know? One is Ethel Merman. I'm telling you, it's unbelievable.

• 48:54Michelle Obama?

  How has it been being a grandfather?

• 48:57Speaker 01

  It's different.

• 48:58Michelle Obama?

  Yeah.

• 48:59Speaker 01

  And it is, it's enchanting. It's enchanting to hear each one say, hi, Papa. And each one gives you a hug differently. But they all give you a hug. And they know that I need to have that hug. Oh, my God. One of them, you know, the 16-year-old. She's beautiful and she FaceTimes me. Say hello to Roy. Oh, hello, Roy. Or she wants to put like a mask on me, you know. Don't do it. Don't do it.

• 49:35Michelle Obama?

  On your FaceTime, you become a rabbit or something.

• 49:38Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 49:40Michelle Obama?

  She loves that, huh? She's like, don't you dare turn me into a rabbit.

• 49:44Speaker 01

  Like my daughter. My daughter used me like a gardening tool when there was a young man around.

• 49:50Michelle Obama?

  How so?

• 49:51Speaker 01

  Just walk by him. Just walk by him. You're on television. Let him see that. All right. Don't say a word. You were in the water, boy. Okay.

• 50:02Speaker 01

  I'm not kidding.

• 50:03Michelle Obama?

  Just move through.

• 50:04Speaker 01

  Just move through. Do not look. Do not look.

• 50:13Craig Robinson?

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• 50:58Craig Robinson?

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• 51:28Craig Robinson?

  Well, you know, here on IMO, we like to take questions from our listeners.

• 51:32Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 51:33Craig Robinson?

  And hopefully give them a little bit of advice. And I think we have a perfect question from you that's coming from-

• 51:41Michelle Obama?

  For you.

• 51:41Craig Robinson?

  For you, not from-

• 51:42Speaker 01

  I knew what you meant. I knew what you meant. Brother, sister, I saw it. I saw it happen right in front of me.

• 51:47Michelle Obama?

  It was just like, do I let him? Do I let him let that go? I feel like I'm helping him.

• 51:53Speaker 01

  You know what? I understand and really, God bless you.

• 51:56Craig Robinson?

  Yes, thank you very much. But we have a question from a listener in Colorado.

• 52:03Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 52:04Craig Robinson?

  Terry in Longmouth.

• 52:06Speaker 01

  They get to wear sweaters.

• 52:07Craig Robinson?

  Yes.

• 52:09Speaker 03

  I have five adult children. They are all married and have their own kids. My question to you is, how do you parent your kids as adults? When my adult children come to me with struggles they are having, I sometimes find myself at a loss as to how to help them or how much I should be trying to help them. I'm curious what you think our place should be in supporting them.

• 52:30Speaker 01

  Okay. All right, so number one, you really don't have a place in parenting your adult children. Two, it is so difficult to shut up.

• 52:43Michelle Obama?

  Yes, it is.

• 52:44Speaker 01

  You want to say to, what are you kidding? You're holding your kid that way?

• 52:51Speaker 01

  What are you feeding them? Okay, that's, what do you mean? She only eats cereal.

• 52:58Speaker 01

  All right, when you're at a loss, you say, I am so sorry. I'm at a loss. Because you don't want to say something that will not be the authentic. That is my feeling. When they come to you, my daughter, also, talk in short sentences. A parent will talk in paragraphs.

• 53:26Michelle Obama?

  I do that.

• 53:26Speaker 01

  You will watch the eyes glaze over like ham.

• 53:37Craig Robinson?

  We're all laughing because we've done it.

• 53:39Michelle Obama?

  Oh, my God.

• 53:40Speaker 01

  Short sentences. And they will hear you.

• 53:43Craig Robinson?

  Yeah.

• 53:44Speaker 01

  And I also say, as a parent, with, you know, just at the beginning-

• 53:50Speaker 01

  You, your job is to repeat the same sentence for 18 years.

• 53:58Michelle Obama?

  Yes.

• 53:59Speaker 01

  Every day.

• 54:00Michelle Obama?

  Yeah.

• 54:02Michelle Obama?

  It's true. It's so true. And then one day, in their 40s, they're like, wow, you were listening.

• 54:11Speaker 01

  It is, that is so true. I cannot even tell you.

• 54:15Michelle Obama?

  Well, it's like the toughest thing in the world is to, um, and Craig and I, we talk about this a lot, is part of raising people.

• 54:26Speaker 01

  True.

• 54:26Michelle Obama?

  And adults is.

• 54:27Speaker 01

  The hardest job on the planet.

• 54:28Michelle Obama?

  The hardest job is that, the goal is to, as quickly as possible, give them the tools to think and problem solve for themselves.

• 54:38Speaker 01

  To be who they're supposed to be.

• 54:40Michelle Obama?

  Right, right. And also to give them some confidence that they can do it. And it's a, it's a hard thing to do as a parent, to try not to fix everything for them before it's.

• 54:52Speaker 01

  I'm, uh, guilty of that.

• 54:54Michelle Obama?

  Yeah, I, I am too. I mean, Malia was with us. She was, we're staying with a friend and they, whenever they have a chance to stay in a nice house, they do. They're just like, we're coming over, you know? We're just to take a bath and to have nice towels. And so they wound up staying over last night because they stayed too long. And so they were sleeping in these beds. She got up and she's like, oh, sleeping in nice sheets. It's the best thing ever. I immediately say, you don't have nice sheets? You know, what do you, what do you need? Um, my, my, my baby doesn't have nice sheets? And she was like, mom, my sheets are fine. You know, it's like, my apartment doesn't have air conditioning. If they're too nice, they suffocate.

• 55:38Michelle Obama?

  My, my point being is that I was immediately.

• 55:41Speaker 01

  I'm with you.

• 55:41Michelle Obama?

  I try, I wanted, I felt her discomfort and I wanted to fix it. Um, and you have to resist the urge.

• 55:50Speaker 01

  You have to resist.

• 55:51Michelle Obama?

  To fix their discomfort. You have to watch them, I say this all the time. You have to watch the, the, the, the person, the being you love the most, walk straight into a wall that you see. It's like it's a wall. And you're going, you're moving really, you're gonna, oh, you hit it. Oh, my God, I needed to let you do that. That's a hard thing to do as a parent.

• 56:15Speaker 01

  Well, the one thing you just said is, is I would put in the beginning of all those sentences, give them the confidence to be, when, when a baby is here, when they come and they're, they come full blown.

• 56:32Speaker 01

  And what you said is the beginning and the end, give them the confidence to meet their destiny.

• 56:38Michelle Obama?

  Yeah, yeah. And if you do that, young, right? So, um, to our listener, to Terry, if you do all that hard work early.

• 56:52Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 56:53Michelle Obama?

  And early, I mean, I'm talking one.

• 56:56Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 56:57Michelle Obama?

  Two years old.

• 57:00Michelle Obama?

  Then the question of how do I parent my adult children becomes moot because you won't have to.

• 57:06Speaker 01

  Right, because you've already done it.

• 57:08Michelle Obama?

  You've given them the tools early on and that, that is the beauty about being the parent of adult children.

• 57:15Speaker 01

  The only thing is, I, I have to say that my daughter sometimes comes to me with an insecurity that is from the little girl in her. And then I talk to her not as the little girl, but I would say the same thing to the little girl, who is that insecure at 43. And we talk it through and she goes, thanks dad, I have to go and pick up Jed now.

• 57:44Craig Robinson?

  Yeah.

• 57:44Speaker 01

  I have to go pick up Ace.

• 57:46Craig Robinson?

  Yeah. No, I think that this, this is all really good for Terry. The short sentences.

• 57:52Speaker 01

  Do we ever get to meet Terry?

• 57:53Michelle Obama?

  No, we're, we're working on that.

• 57:55Craig Robinson?

  We're working on it.

• 57:55Michelle Obama?

  We've talked about following up with our listeners.

• 57:59Craig Robinson?

  And having the questioners actually ask the question. We've talked about that, but.

• 58:04Michelle Obama?

  Terry, you.

• 58:05Craig Robinson?

  So I was.

• 58:05Speaker 01

  You're talking authentic.

• 58:06Craig Robinson?

  Yeah, so being authentic and, and Meech was saying, get the work done early.

• 58:11Speaker 01

  That's right.

• 58:12Craig Robinson?

  And I'm gonna bring up something you said earlier, which is what your therapist does. Sometimes you don't say anything.

• 58:24Craig Robinson?

  When they come to you for advice, you ask them what they think.

• 58:30Speaker 01

  You know what, there is, believe it or not, a book I found when my children were young. It was called Effectiveness Parenting Training. It was something like that. Take my word for it. And what it was, is you only make noise. My son would say, "I am not going to school." And I just said, "Uh huh. Oh. Yeah, I, oh wow, you sound angry." Yeah, and he would screw himself into the bulbs, into the ceiling, and then unscrew himself, get in the car, put on a seatbelt, and say, "Hurry up, we're gonna be late."

• 59:10Craig Robinson?

  Yeah.

• 59:12Speaker 01

  Don't say anything, you are so right, I'm not kidding.

• 59:16Craig Robinson?

  That is a, that was a Frasier and Marion Robinson tactic.

• 59:20Michelle Obama?

  And for, and for someone who is a talker, like me, that was a lesson that I'm still learning, is to do more, wow, oh, mm, ooh, yeah.

• 59:33Speaker 01

  But you know what?

• 59:35Speaker 01

  Just by making those sounds, you tell the, the child, you're hearing them, you're listening, without knocking them off their, um, their path at the moment.

• 59:48Michelle Obama?

  Or telling them how they should feel.

• 59:50Speaker 01

  Yes, right.

• 59:50Michelle Obama?

  Yeah, our mom was good at that, and, you know, she lived with us in the White House. She came, and that, that, that helped us get through, having a version of you. Funny, sane, grounded, in that house through that experience, kept us all together. For me personally, almost every other day, she, she stayed in a suite of rooms on the third floor. And she would come down to be there for the girls to come home. She never wanted to just have dinner unless we were having company, because she wanted us to have family time, just the four of us. So she'd eat dinner upstairs. But every afternoon after I got home, or every, from a busy day at work,

• 1:00:35Michelle Obama?

  I'd walk up before the kids got home and just sat. And I did the same thing that I always did, I just talked. You know, this happened today. I read this, this article happened and I, you know, I watched the news and I, I just, she would just let me talk. Um, and as the first lady of the United States, just going upstairs to my mommy's room.

• 1:01:00Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:01:00Michelle Obama?

  And just letting it all out.

• 1:01:02Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:01:03Michelle Obama?

  With her going, wow. Mm, mm.

• 1:01:06Speaker 01

  Cause the first lady of the United States is a human first.

• 1:01:09Michelle Obama?

  Yeah, yeah. Um, she did that for us our entire life.

• 1:01:14Speaker 01

  That's amazing. I never had that experience.

• 1:01:16Michelle Obama?

  Yeah, yes, you did now.

• 1:01:18Craig Robinson?

  But you turned out wonderfully.

• 1:01:20Michelle Obama?

  Thank you.

• 1:01:21Speaker 01

  Well, you know, like at least 87%.

• 1:01:25Michelle Obama?

  Yeah. But this conversation, you know, we shared a lot of don'ts.

• 1:01:30Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 1:01:31Michelle Obama?

  Um, that your parents.

• 1:01:33Speaker 01

  This was amazing, this conversation.

• 1:01:34Michelle Obama?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:35Craig Robinson?

  You know, we appreciate you.

• 1:01:36Speaker 01

  I had no idea what it was going to be.

• 1:01:37Michelle Obama?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:38Speaker 01

  I was a little nervous.

• 1:01:39Michelle Obama?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:40Craig Robinson?

  Were you?

• 1:01:40Speaker 01

  Yeah, and I feel like I'm, I'm coming for lamb chops.

• 1:01:44Craig Robinson?

  Yes, that's what we want you to do.

• 1:01:46Speaker 01

  Yeah, I just, I like, I do and I like mint jelly.

• 1:01:49Michelle Obama?

  Of course, you are of that generation.

• 1:01:51Speaker 01

  Yes, I am.

• 1:01:51Michelle Obama?

  Where the mint jelly and the lamb chops, that's a thing, you know?

• 1:01:55Speaker 01

  And if you have Spencer roast, I like a currant jelly.

• 1:01:59Michelle Obama?

  Okay, okay. All right, we're gonna keep that in mind.

• 1:02:02Speaker 01

  Thank you.

• 1:02:02Michelle Obama?

  You're gonna keep that. This, this has been a delightful.

• 1:02:05Speaker 01

  Oh, my goodness.

• 1:02:06Michelle Obama?

  Conversation. I mean, you, you are wise.

• 1:02:09Speaker 01

  Oh, wow, I didn't.

• 1:02:11Michelle Obama?

  You are. Uh, well, hey, it's been 80 years of the built up wisdom that you.

• 1:02:19Craig Robinson?

  Speaking of 80.

• 1:02:20Michelle Obama?

  Oh, yes, we.

• 1:02:21Craig Robinson?

  We actually knew it would be your 80th birthday. So we had a little bit of a something planned for you.

• 1:02:28Michelle Obama?

  Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday, dear Henry. Happy birthday to you.

• 1:02:46Craig Robinson?

  And many more.

• 1:02:48Michelle Obama?

  And then we have to sing the black happy birthday. Happy birthday to ya. Happy birthday to ya. This is Stevie Wonder. Happy birthday, happy.

• 1:03:02Michelle Obama?

  Happy Birthday. Happy Birthday. Yeah, go. It never ends. Go, Henry. Happy Birthday. Okay, we can stop there.

• 1:03:41Craig Robinson?

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