Molly Shannon Returns

Actress Molly Shannon feels proud and cool to be Conan O’Brien’s friend. Molly sits down with Conan once more to discuss her rule-breaking youth, creative ways to calm the brain, and her longtime friendship with Will Ferrell leading all the way up to their new Netflix series The Hawk. Plus, David Hopping reveals a disturbing corner of TikTok focusing on Conan’s Toy Story 5 character Smarty Pants. For Conan videos, tour dates and more visit TeamCoco.com. Got a question for Conan? Call our voicemail: (323) 362-2295.

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:02Conan O'Brien?

  Who do you shop for first on the holidays, Sona? Was it, do you shop for the kids or do you shop for Tac?

• 0:06Speaker 01

  My kids.

• 0:07Conan O'Brien?

  Okay.

• 0:07Speaker 01

  Or Oki.

• 0:08Conan O'Brien?

  You gotta get them your stuff.

• 0:08Speaker 01

  Or my dog.

• 0:09Conan O'Brien?

  And then your husband is last. Well, guess what? It's that time of year. You feel that, you smell that, uh, that cinnamon cider in the air? Do you smell that?

• 0:18Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 0:19Conan O'Brien?

  And you see pumpkins around, people buying turkeys. A little early to buy a turkey.

• 0:23Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 0:24Conan O'Brien?

  Doesn't matter. Holidays? I would say it's just around the corner, but that's a cliche. It's, uh, very nearby in the cupboard. Well, guess what? Amazon delivers joy with low prices on the gifts you want even this early in the season. So get ahead of the season. Shop early gifts, top picks, holiday decor, and advent calendars at low prices. Get ahead, start on holiday gifting with Amazon's low prices. Shop now at amazon.com/holiday.

• 0:55Conan O'Brien?

  Now, Sona, clearly I'm a very important person to you.

• 0:57Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 0:58Conan O'Brien?

  Just accept the premise and we'll move ahead.

• 0:59Speaker 01

  Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:00Conan O'Brien?

  I'm a very important person to you. What would you get me from Macy's for the holidays?

• 1:06Speaker 01

  A vase.

• 1:07Conan O'Brien?

  No, I don't want a vase. I want something better.

• 1:10Speaker 01

  A jacket.

• 1:11Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, nice jacket. I love a nice jacket.

• 1:13Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah, that jacket, nice jacket.

• 1:14Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, so now you have to do it. Cause you said you would.

• 1:15Speaker 01

  Aw, man, I didn't know you were doing that.

• 1:18Conan O'Brien?

  Well, I know the holidays, I know the holidays are months away, but it's never too early, Sona, to find gifts that I will love, gifts I will wear, and surprises that make the season unforgettable for me.

• 1:29Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 1:30Conan O'Brien?

  Macy's Gift Guide makes holiday shopping easy with beauty favorites, stylish fashion, jewelry, cozy essentials, must-have toys, home upgrades, and picks for every person on your list. Coach handbags, Breville appliances, Lego UG, and more all in one place. You can skip the scrolling and shop with confidence. Shop now in-store or online at macy's.com/giftguide.

• 1:55Speaker 02

  Hi, my name is Molly Shannon and I feel

• 2:00Speaker 02

  proud and cool to be Conan O'Brien's friend.

• 2:04Conan O'Brien?

  Whoa, okay.

• 2:04Speaker 02

  Cool.

• 2:05Conan O'Brien?

  No, you're not.

• 2:08Conan O'Brien?

  I don't think I generate a cool vibe, but...

• 2:10Speaker 02

  Yes, you do.

• 2:11Conan O'Brien?

  Really?

• 2:11Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah, of course.

• 2:12Conan O'Brien?

  I didn't know that.

• 2:13Speaker 02

  Are you kidding? The coolest.

• 2:36Conan O'Brien?

  Hey there, welcome to Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend. I'm joined by Sonam of Sessian.

• 2:41Speaker 01

  Hello.

• 2:42Conan O'Brien?

  And of course, Mr. Gourley, how are you, sir? I'm well, how are you? I'm really good. Although we did discover recently that the chair I'm in makes noises.

• 2:51Speaker 01

  Yeah, it does.

• 2:51Conan O'Brien?

  Are we gonna oil this chair? What's going on?

• 2:53Speaker 01

  I am not the person.

• 2:54Conan O'Brien?

  Did we find out what's wrong with this chair? I'm actually, I will say, Jason Chalme and I are ahead of the game. We already switched that chair out for you. So this is a new chair that doesn't make noise. But I just interviewed a very famous celebrity. Yes. And while I was talking to him, I heard Yes. We all thought it was a fun- It sounded like a very old Jimmy Stewart at an auction. Ahhh!

• 3:15Speaker 01

  Oh, God!

• 3:16Conan O'Brien?

  Ahhh! I can't buy that! But what it was, what was going on? Who would allow a chair like that to even be in this room? Well, we're not exactly, we don't test the chairs every day beforehand. That's why you didn't get that job at NASA. Well, we don't test the rockets.

• 3:31Speaker 01

  That's why.

• 3:32Conan O'Brien?

  We didn't test, I mean, we kind of operate, in this studio, we kind of operate on a, oh, when it breaks, then we fix it. Yeah, yeah. Versus being ahead of the game, we kind of wait for something bad to happen. Well, I don't know, you just looped Eduardo into your failure. Oh, no. And, and that's not, no, no. I go by that. Yeah. Let's just make sure we have the proper equipment. Perfect. Everyone looked at the clock to see how much more time we have during this segment when I started speaking, by the way. Yeah.

• 3:58Speaker 03

  Oh, I do it to just mark when to wrap. I wasn't making a judgment call.

• 4:01Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, I see, okay, yeah.

• 4:01Speaker 03

  Blay, I like you and I appreciate you.

• 4:03Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, and I'm just looking-

• 4:03Speaker 01

  I didn't look at it.

• 4:04Conan O'Brien?

  I don't look at the clock, I just look for something that I can hurt myself with.

• 4:07Speaker 01

  Just made it so awkward.

• 4:09Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 4:10Speaker 01

  Like, we want you to just stop talking.

• 4:11Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 4:12Speaker 01

  But we tell you that.

• 4:13Conan O'Brien?

  But everybody just looked at the clock.

• 4:14Speaker 01

  Subtle about it.

• 4:15Conan O'Brien?

  No, no, no. Literally, you all looked, as soon as I started speaking, everyone looked at the clock.

• 4:19Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 4:19Conan O'Brien?

  No, they didn't. I didn't look at the clock. You did. You all looked over there. No, I didn't. This is on video. We can go back.

• 4:24Speaker 03

  I'm the keeper of the time. That's my job. It's nothing personal.

• 4:26Conan O'Brien?

  Okay.

• 4:27Speaker 03

  But now, now you've talked a lot.

• 4:28Conan O'Brien?

  Well, okay.

• 4:29Speaker 01

  Yeah. Now I'm looking at the clock a lot.

• 4:31Conan O'Brien?

  I apologize. Your chair is fixed. It's fixed. But it did make a big noise, and it was a big problem. Uh huh, uh huh. Not a big problem. It needs to be fixed right over there. I'm sorry. Uh.

• 4:41Speaker 03

  You're saying that this, this institution is literally not a well-oiled machine.

• 4:45Conan O'Brien?

  Exactly. It is not. Um, we had a topic, um, and then we went down this primrose path.

• 4:52Speaker 03

  I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

• 4:54Conan O'Brien?

  What were we talking about? I can't remember. Why don't we just start over? No, no, this is fine. Just, will you not?

• 4:59Speaker 01

  Shut up, Blay.

• 5:00Conan O'Brien?

  When did you decide, Blay, when did you decide that you needed to steer the podcast left and right? I got this. I got this. What a madman.

• 5:08Speaker 03

  Look, leave, leave the man alone.

• 5:10Speaker 01

  God.

• 5:10Speaker 03

  He does a lot here. I'm, I'm.

• 5:11Conan O'Brien?

  I know he does a lot.

• 5:12Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 5:13Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sort of the Unabomber. Okay, so, we had, I'm talking to you now, Matt.

• 5:19Speaker 03

  Me?

• 5:20Conan O'Brien?

  Let's see, let's see if Interjecty can just settle down for a second.

• 5:22Speaker 01

  What about me?

• 5:23Conan O'Brien?

  You're good, okay?

• 5:26Conan O'Brien?

  We'll get to you. We had a topic that we agreed on before we started.

• 5:29Speaker 03

  We were gonna talk about the fact that Sona's sons have learned to swim.

• 5:33Conan O'Brien?

  Oh my god. That was the topic?

• 5:35Speaker 03

  Full disclosure, we sat around for five minutes.

• 5:37Conan O'Brien?

  That was the topic?

• 5:38Speaker 03

  We're trying to think of something.

• 5:39Conan O'Brien?

  That was the topic that made us say, "Hallelujah"?

• 5:42Speaker 03

  No, it was, she brought it up and you went, "Okay, let's go."

• 5:45Speaker 01

  I know, you did. I just was saying it.

• 5:47Conan O'Brien?

  You moved it. Wow. You know what's looking tempting right now? Blaze multi-volume discussion of squeaking chairs. Part four. Chapter one. Um, but, uh, okay, so, let's, let's commit to this. See if there's something there.

• 6:04Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 6:05Conan O'Brien?

  So, Sona, word on the street is that your twin sons learned to swim?

• 6:09Speaker 01

  Yeah, Charlie and Mikey can swim now.

• 6:11Conan O'Brien?

  Okay.

• 6:11Speaker 01

  No floaties needed, baby.

• 6:13Conan O'Brien?

  What was the process?

• 6:14Speaker 01

  Uh, they went to classes and had an instructor, one-on-one, and they taught them what to do, and they, they did it.

• 6:20Conan O'Brien?

  Wow. Well, that's a good story.

• 6:22Speaker 03

  I've got a story.

• 6:23Conan O'Brien?

  No, but I, I have one too.

• 6:25Speaker 01

  I wanna, I, I really-

• 6:26Conan O'Brien?

  Do you wanna hear about how I learned to swim?

• 6:28Speaker 01

  That's what I was gonna say. I wanna learn how you, you learned.

• 6:30Conan O'Brien?

  Let me show you how you tell a story about swimming. We went, they made a promise that the swimming would be learned. It was learned and all was done.

• 6:39Speaker 03

  No conflict?

• 6:40Conan O'Brien?

  Then, no conflict, no plot point, and then everyone was happy.

• 6:44Speaker 01

  Well, I mean-

• 6:45Conan O'Brien?

  And then long credits. Forty-minute credits.

• 6:47Speaker 01

  We did have a little bit of a conflict.

• 6:49Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, good. This is how you tell a story.

• 6:50Speaker 03

  You didn't wanna lead with that?

• 6:51Speaker 01

  They were learning how to swim in this one pool.

• 6:53Conan O'Brien?

  Mm-hmm.

• 6:53Speaker 01

  And then they thought they could only swim in that one pool.

• 6:57Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, you took them someplace else and they thought-

• 6:58Speaker 01

  So then when I took them home, or we took them to another pool, they were like, "This is not the pool we swim in."

• 7:03Speaker 03

  They, they took site-specific swimming lessons.

• 7:05Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, yeah. It only works in that one pool.

• 7:08Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 7:08Conan O'Brien?

  I can understand that. That's sweet. Um, when I was a little kid, growing up, and I think I've mentioned this before, uh, we didn't have a summer house or anything, but we would stay at my grandfather's summer cottage. He had a small house, uh, near the state beach in Miss Quamica, Rhode Island. And so, all of us, the giant O'Brien clan, would cram into my, uh, grandparents' house. And that was our favorite thing. We'd go there for like a month in August, and we would go down to the beach. And it was time for us to learn swimming, how to, how to swim, and my mother signed us up for Red Cross classes

• 7:47Conan O'Brien?

  that they taught in, um, this marshy area that was near the, uh, near the state beach. You know, not the most appetizing body of water. It was like a salt marsh.

• 7:59Speaker 03

  This is where you're gonna learn to swim?

• 8:01Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, and you'd like, you'd climb through some, some- Paul Reed, maybe be attacked by a crane. And, you know, it had that boggy smell, methany smell. But anyway, we'd all gather, of course, my mother, um, I would burn constantly. And so she would just put white t-shirts on us, which we now know just attracts more sun. Um, and I would get giant blisters on my back.

• 8:28Speaker 01

  I'm just picturing these little red children.

• 8:31Conan O'Brien?

  No, I was so.

• 8:31Speaker 01

  Walking into a swamp.

• 8:32Conan O'Brien?

  I was so red, I don't even think they had come out with sunblock yet. This is, you know, the early 1970s. So she put, I think she just put mayonnaise on our faces. And then I'd be attacked by these.

• 8:45Speaker 03

  More advertising for the animals.

• 8:46Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, attacked by these marsh animals. So I'm sitting there, like cross-legged, and this woman would lecture us. And then she would say, whose turn it was to go in and, and the first thing she wanted us to learn was how to float on our back. And I remember she would always read through all our names when we had to say present. But she would always say the same thing. She would go, Conan O'Brien. C-O-N-O-N, Conan O'Brien. And then on the ride home, my brother Neil would go, Conan O'Brien. Conan O'Brien.

• 9:23Conan O'Brien?

  And I would sit there, burning, like, shivering, because you get like blisters and then you're shivering. Uh, and, and covered in just like a methany bog smell. And still like a, uh, you know, some kind of, some kind of marsh bird still nestled in my shirt. And, um, that was my traumatic introduction. But I do thank the Red Cross for teaching me how to float on my back, which I can do to this day. Which I can do to this day. And yes, you have a story.

• 9:57Speaker 03

  Oh, well, a year ago, when we hired a swimming instructor for my daughter Glenn. And so this is the first time she's coming over. We've never met her. She's a wonderful young woman. Comes over, gets out of her day clothes into a leopard print one-piece, very attractive young woman.

• 10:18Conan O'Brien?

  Wow.

• 10:18Speaker 03

  Sits there, none of us have entered the backyard yet, and she's just sitting there in the pool. Turns out she's in our neighbor's pool, and the mother of the neighbors comes out and is like, what is this woman?

• 10:31Conan O'Brien?

  She went to the wrong house?

• 10:32Speaker 03

  She went to the wrong house. What is this? Is my husband having an affair? What is this woman in a leopard print bathing suit doing in our pool? And she came over, she figured it out and came over. She's like, I'm so sorry. I just, I just went to your neighbor's and the wife was there and she thought maybe I was having an affair or something.

• 10:48Conan O'Brien?

  Can I just say, this is the excuse I use every time Liza catches me cheating. Every time. Who's this bikini bimbo in our backyard?

• 10:58Speaker 03

  Swimming instructor who mistakenly came to our home.

• 11:03Conan O'Brien?

  I say that every time. And Liza goes, oh!

• 11:06Speaker 01

  Oh, my god.

• 11:07Conan O'Brien?

  So how did the lessons go?

• 11:10Speaker 03

  Fine after that. And she and I are very close now.

• 11:15Conan O'Brien?

  I bet you are. Uh, listen, the important thing is, it started off with us not knowing what to say. And, uh, and Blay, you did try to help, and I appreciate that. Um, you know, you stumbled and bumbled, as most large forest bears do.

• 11:30Speaker 03

  Yes, I'm sorry.

• 11:31Conan O'Brien?

  But you did help. You got us. And then I think my anger towards you caused me to come up, suddenly remember this story.

• 11:38Speaker 01

  Oh, or maybe it was me prompting you guys with some good premise.

• 11:43Speaker 03

  It could have been. But don't we always say, let's just go, we'll figure it out?

• 11:46Conan O'Brien?

  But also, it was Sona's inability to tell a good story, that I think, at a panic, I rose to the occasion, and then you rose to the occasion. So Sona, you helped too.

• 11:55Speaker 01

  You're welcome.

• 11:56Conan O'Brien?

  All right. My guest today is a hilarious actress who was a cast member on Saturday Night Live. Now you can see her alongside Will Ferrell in the new Netflix comedy series, The Hawk. This woman is one of my all-time favorite human beings, and I'm thrilled she's back on the podcast.

• 12:18Conan O'Brien?

  Molly Shannon, welcome.

• 12:24Conan O'Brien?

  Molly, uh, listen, I've known you a long time. You're gonna listen to me now. I don't always say, "Listen." Listen here. I've known you a long-- now you listen to me. Uh, I'm a huge admirer of yours. You have the best energy. Molly just walked into this building and just made everybody happy.

• 12:42Speaker 01

  It's sunshine.

• 12:43Conan O'Brien?

  But that's the effect you have on people. You were talking to everyone. You were talking about how much you loved the building. You were hugging me. You were hugging our booker, Paula Davis.

• 12:56Speaker 01

  I got a hug.

• 12:57Speaker 02

  Oh, yes.

• 12:59Conan O'Brien?

  Even you got a hug.

• 13:00Speaker 01

  Yeah, even you. Come on.

• 13:03Conan O'Brien?

  I always feel like we have-- oh, here's your coffee.

• 13:06Speaker 02

  Oh, my gosh.

• 13:06Conan O'Brien?

  Let's have this coffee come in. Thank you very much, Maddie.

• 13:08Speaker 02

  Thank you.

• 13:09Conan O'Brien?

  And you're fired.

• 13:09Speaker 02

  Thank you so much, Maddie.

• 13:11Conan O'Brien?

  Uh, so I've always felt like a kinship with you, Molly. And I don't know if I'm correct in saying any of this, but we both are Irish stock. Catholic.

• 13:22Speaker 02

  Yes, Irish Catholic, yeah.

• 13:23Conan O'Brien?

  Okay, and I used to watch you, you know, over the years, when I first was watching you on SNL, and I would notice that you would just throw yourself around with absolute careless abandon. Often into stacked chairs, classroom chairs, as Mary Catherine Gallagher, you know? And at the time, I remember thinking, "Well, those must be made of foam." And then I found out later, no, they're just the same chairs they use in a classroom, which are the most dangerous thing in the world you can throw yourself into.

• 13:55Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah.

• 13:56Conan O'Brien?

  I would see you do that, and I would think, "Oh, I too, if I think it will get a laugh, will do something-- would throw myself into a pile of nails if I thought people would laugh."

• 14:11Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah.

• 14:12Conan O'Brien?

  And I thought, uh, this Molly Shannon-- I don't know, it's just always made me very curious about you. And I've always felt like we're quasi-related. Is that possible?

• 14:23Speaker 02

  I know, it could be possible. Um, but-

• 14:26Conan O'Brien?

  How Catholic were you growing up?

• 14:28Speaker 02

  Very Catholic. My dad was really, um, you know, yeah, we went to church all the time and he was very, uh, I would say very religious, you know? Yeah, yeah. He believed that you shouldn't have sex before marriage, or you should put your marriage certificate above the bed, like that type of Catholic.

• 14:46Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, my God.

• 14:47Speaker 02

  Interesting, right? Yeah, yeah. He felt like you shouldn't live with somebody before you were married.

• 14:52Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, well, that would be my parents as well.

• 14:54Speaker 02

  Your parents too, yeah.

• 14:55Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 14:55Speaker 02

  Yeah, interesting, yeah.

• 14:56Conan O'Brien?

  They were both very Catholic.

• 14:59Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 15:00Conan O'Brien?

  Um, in almost a 19th century way, you know?

• 15:03Speaker 02

  That's interesting.

• 15:05Conan O'Brien?

  And they were both very smart, my parents were both very smart people who lived in the modern world, but came from this 19th century idea, I think, a little bit of how one should conduct oneself.

• 15:17Speaker 02

  That's, I love that, old fashioned values. I was gonna say, but regarding the Mary Catherine stuff, I feel at that time I was much crazier and more reckless, and it felt a little bit like, I didn't care, and I, I wouldn't even feel pain when I was doing it. I would feel nothing. I would feel it the next day, but I couldn't-

• 15:33Conan O'Brien?

  Yes, the next day.

• 15:34Speaker 02

  Does that, isn't that, like, I wake up bruised and cut, and I could not feel it in the moment at all.

• 15:39Conan O'Brien?

  So, my wife would always notice, like, I'm getting out of the shower, and I would just, my whole leg would be yellow and purple, and she'd say, "What is that?", and I'd go, "Huh?". And then I'd remember, "Oh, right, we had a water buffalo on set, and I jumped on it, and I got thrown off of it", you know? I would remember these things, and it didn't hurt as much at the time, because I was getting all the adrenaline of people laughing.

• 16:02Speaker 02

  Exactly.

• 16:02Conan O'Brien?

  Ha, ha, ha, ha.

• 16:03Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 16:04Conan O'Brien?

  "Orange man fell down."

• 16:07Speaker 02

  And then you didn't even notice you were bruised, and yeah.

• 16:10Conan O'Brien?

  No, you don't really think about that stuff, and then later on, you'd notice, "This leg won't work."

• 16:14Speaker 02

  Yeah, exactly.

• 16:16Conan O'Brien?

  Just walking in circles.

• 16:17Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 16:18Conan O'Brien?

  Did you, I think you used to watch mass on television, because I remember that being a fixture. When I was staying at my grandfather's, uh, house, he would have the mass on, my grandmother and grandfather would have the mass on television. And I remember being kind of fascinated by that, because sometimes it was the only thing that came in. This is before cable.

• 16:36Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 16:36Conan O'Brien?

  And you would just watch whatever came in, like, "Oh, we're getting reception on this one channel. It's a Catholic mass. Let's check it out." It beats going outside and playing like other people.

• 16:48Speaker 02

  Yeah. My sister Mary and I would watch the mass for shut-ins, they called it. And we would count, and they would show people going up to communion and we would try to-

• 16:56Conan O'Brien?

  To get the wafer, yeah.

• 16:57Speaker 02

  To get the wafer. We would guess how many people were wearing glasses.

• 17:03Speaker 02

  We'd be like, "One, two, three, yeah."

• 17:09Conan O'Brien?

  And so it was, I mean, today, you were looking into the future, because today, that's the kind of stuff people bet online about. They can, you can make any kind of bet, and that's the kind of thing people would bet online about now.

• 17:20Speaker 02

  My friend's son started Polymarket.

• 17:22Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, you're kidding?

• 17:23Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm, yeah.

• 17:24Conan O'Brien?

  That must be going quite well.

• 17:25Speaker 02

  Wisdom of the crowd, right?

• 17:27Conan O'Brien?

  Yes.

• 17:27Speaker 02

  Yeah. I know, it's amazing. But I was gonna say, and then we would watch this other show called Davy and Goliath right after. Do you remember that?

• 17:34Conan O'Brien?

  Of course I remember Davy and Goliath. It was claymation.

• 17:36Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 17:37Conan O'Brien?

  And it was, it was a boy named Davy, and his dog was named Goliath. And Goliath would be like, "I don't know, Davy. It doesn't sound like a good idea." And they were made, I think, by the Catholic archdiocese.

• 17:49Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 17:50Conan O'Brien?

  And they were little morality tales. And so it was always, you know, this claymation boy-

• 17:56Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 17:57Conan O'Brien?

  Saying, "I'm gonna go over there and, you know, throw paint against that wall." "I don't know, Davy." Oh, there they are. There's Davy and Goliath.

• 18:06Speaker 02

  That's so cool, yeah. I love that show.

• 18:09Conan O'Brien?

  So, that show was weird. Some of the episodes were very strange.

• 18:14Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll have to go back and look at it, but I remember-

• 18:17Conan O'Brien?

  Let me refresh your memory.

• 18:19Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 18:20Conan O'Brien?

  I'm glad you brought this up. There's one, my brother Neil and I howled for days about this. We were watching it. Davy and the whole family's on a camping trip, and Davy finds this beautiful spring, like a little watering hole, that all the animals are drinking at, and it's just beautiful. And Davy finds a can of red paint, and he pours it into the watering hole and says, "Look, I made a giant strawberry shake. Ha, ha, ha." And of course, the dog goes, "I don't know, Davy." And then you see all the animals try-

• 18:56Speaker 02

  Davy?

• 18:56Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, you see all the animals try to drink out of it, and they can't. Do they die? And I think they're gonna die. And the father has a stern talk with Davy, and I thought, Davy's a sociopath.

• 19:10Conan O'Brien?

  That's amazing.

• 19:11Speaker 01

  That's really messed up.

• 19:12Conan O'Brien?

  I'm gonna put plutonium in this water supply. So no one in New York can have a drink of water and anyone who does will die. I don't know, Dave. That's an act of terrorism. Anyway, I'm sorry. I went on a jag there.

• 19:26Speaker 02

  I love it. Wait, Conan, do you, are you like, do you consider yourself an extrovert extrovert? Or do you ever have time when you're not performing, like not being bruised, waking up bruised, where you're just like, have to be quiet and just reading or?

• 19:42Conan O'Brien?

  Well, I do like to read.

• 19:43Speaker 02

  I was just curious about that.

• 19:44Conan O'Brien?

  It's a funny thing where I want to say I'm a, I'm, you can be both. It's a weird thing, but you can be an insane extrovert, which I can be. And then there are other times where, you know, people come to the door and I just kind of want to stay in my room.

• 19:59Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 20:00Conan O'Brien?

  Because you almost feel a shyness, like, I don't want to turn that guy on right now.

• 20:04Speaker 02

  Yes, of course.

• 20:06Conan O'Brien?

  I would say most of the time, um, it's weird. You can be both. I'm guessing you're both.

• 20:12Speaker 02

  I'm both. Jack Nicholson used to say when he would go out in public, he would have to be the mayor. You have to be the mayor. Hello, everybody. You know, like really. And I'm like, that's a good way to put it. Yes, I'm definitely both. I love being around people. I'm like you and I, I get energy from people. But I can be by myself for hours and be completely entertained, hiking and being quiet. Yeah. So I think I'm an extrovert introvert, maybe?

• 20:33Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, I think you can be both. I just spent a weekend and it was, my wife was out of town and I just, it was me and my two dogs. Cause my kids are both, you know, uh, out of town. And I just spent my whole weekend either reading a book or walking with the dogs. And then I came in today and I can't stop talking.

• 20:52Speaker 01

  I know.

• 20:53Speaker 02

  That's amazing.

• 20:53Conan O'Brien?

  And it's been a problem. They want to sedate me.

• 20:55Speaker 01

  You've been alone.

• 20:56Speaker 02

  So do you feel like giddy when you're by yourself at the dog's house?

• 20:59Conan O'Brien?

  I'm really happy.

• 21:00Speaker 02

  By myself and like cozy. I can do whatever I want. And how long do you sit and read? How long can you if you have the luxury of time?

• 21:08Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, I would read for hours if I could, you know? I mean, with breaks.

• 21:13Speaker 02

  Yes, with breaks.

• 21:13Conan O'Brien?

  Because, uh, and I blame apps. Apps have shortened my reading time. But, um, as long as I take a little break, um, I can, I can read a lot and I like it. Makes me really happy.

• 21:25Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 21:33Conan O'Brien?

  You know, winning an award, that's a big achievement, right?

• 21:35Speaker 01

  Yeah, I love awards.

• 21:36Conan O'Brien?

  Every now and then in life, maybe something nice like that comes your way. Winning them consistently is almost impossible. It just doesn't happen, you know? Well, guess what? Winning five times in six years? You know what that sounds like to me? Sustained excellence.

• 21:50Speaker 01

  Nice.

• 21:50Conan O'Brien?

  Hyundai has done just that, earning the title of America's best SUV brand for 2026 from US News and World Report. You are a very happy Hyundai driver.

• 21:59Speaker 01

  I drive a Hyundai Palisade and I love my car. I love it. I love driving it around.

• 22:03Conan O'Brien?

  I've been tooling around in an Ioniq 5 N, which I love. Beautiful car. Well, listen, whether you need an SUV for everyday life, your next big adventure, or extra room for family and friends, Hyundai has an option for you. The Tucson Hybrid is loaded with technology and built for everyday life. The Santa Fe Hybrid's fully capable and ready for adventure. The Palisade, that's yours, right?

• 22:23Speaker 01

  Hello!

• 22:23Conan O'Brien?

  They're gonna rename that the Sona. The Palisade Hybrid, yeah, delivers premium capability and class-leading interior space. With available, I have this memorized, H-Track all-wheel drive, up to an EPA-estimated 619 miles of range on vehicles like the Palisade Hybrid and Hyundai's industry-leading warranty. It's easy to see why Hyundai continues to deliver the quality, innovation, technology, and value drivers expect from an award-winning brand. View US News Best Cars at cars.usnews.com and call 562-314-4603 for complete details.

• 22:58Conan O'Brien?

  Did you know that one in four Americans targeted by scams end up falling for them? You fell for it.

• 23:03Speaker 01

  I fell for a scam?

• 23:04Conan O'Brien?

  Now, you didn't lose too much money, but you did lose.

• 23:07Speaker 01

  I did lose and it was very inconvenient and now they put protections on my account like I'm, uh, dumb.

• 23:12Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, I don't know where they got that impression. Criminals are now using AI to make scams look more realistic than ever. In 2025, AI fraud spiked 1,210%.

• 23:26Conan O'Brien?

  And cost Americans $893 million. That's incredible. Well, with AI, it can get so smart now.

• 23:33Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 23:33Conan O'Brien?

  Do you know what I mean?

• 23:34Speaker 01

  Maybe I should start scamming.

• 23:35Conan O'Brien?

  No, that's not the point.

• 23:36Speaker 01

  Oh, no, that's not the point of this.

• 23:37Conan O'Brien?

  That's not the point. One accidental click, Sona, can expose your information, putting you at risk of identity theft. Luckily, this is the point. Not that you should start scamming, but that everyone should get LifeLock.

• 23:48Speaker 01

  Right, right, right, right.

• 23:49Conan O'Brien?

  LifeLock has live US-based restoration specialists who will be with you every step of the way to fix your identity theft from first alert to full restoration. This is fantastic. How do you not have this?

• 24:01Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 24:01Conan O'Brien?

  If you have expenses or money stolen due to identity theft, you're backed by the million-dollar protection package with up to $3 million coverage in some plans. Join now and save up to 30% off your first year. Go to lifelock.com/conan. That's lifelock.com/conan to save 30%. Terms apply.

• 24:19Conan O'Brien?

  Who do you shop for first on the holidays, Sona? Was it, do you shop for the kids or do you shop for Tac?

• 24:23Speaker 01

  My kids.

• 24:24Conan O'Brien?

  OK. You gotta get them your stuff.

• 24:25Speaker 01

  Or my dog.

• 24:26Conan O'Brien?

  And then your husband is last. Well, guess what? It's that time of year. You feel that, you smell that cinnamon cider in the air? Do you smell that?

• 24:36Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 24:36Conan O'Brien?

  And you see pumpkins around, people buying turkeys. A little early to buy a turkey. Doesn't matter. Holidays? I would say it's just around the corner, but that's a cliche. It's very nearby in the cupboard. Well, guess what? Amazon delivers joy with low prices on the gifts you want even this early in the season. So get ahead of the season. Shop early gifts, top picks, holiday decor, and advent calendars at low prices. Get ahead, start on holiday gifting with Amazon's low prices. Shop now at amazon.com/holiday.

• 25:16Conan O'Brien?

  This is interesting because when you describe your childhood, it's not like mine. And you've talked about this, I know, a lot. And you've talked about it on this podcast.

• 25:27Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 25:28Conan O'Brien?

  How your dad was very unconventional in some of his thinking.

• 25:31Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 25:31Conan O'Brien?

  Because at one point, in one ways, he's very Catholic and very strict. But in another way, he had these very strange ideas that he was about what it is to have a child. I guess, is that fair to say?

• 25:46Speaker 02

  Oh, sure, yeah.

• 25:47Conan O'Brien?

  Like, he would encourage, you've never talked to this, about this with me, but he would encourage you to cheat.

• 25:53Speaker 02

  Yes, yes. He did not care a lot about school.

• 25:57Conan O'Brien?

  So this is a guy who says no premarital sex, no premarital sex. And you can't live with someone before you marry them, but if you can cheat to get ahead, do it.

• 26:07Speaker 02

  He was like that. No, he just, he really thought street smarts were like a great thing, you know, learning how to make a buck and make it in the world. And school, he would say, if I had a big exam and I was stressed out in high school, he would say, can't you get a, call in sick and get a copy of the test so you can go in the next day? So he really did not care about school. He was so laid back. And, um, yeah, he was much more into street smarts. Isn't that interesting?

• 26:35Conan O'Brien?

  It's fascinating.

• 26:36Speaker 02

  And then, yeah, so he didn't mind. And then if we went to the amusement park, like he's like, okay, if you guys clean out that backyard, I'll take you to Giaga Lake, this local amusement park in Cleveland. And then, but then when we got there, he was like, I don't really want to have to pay. So he was like, can you guys sneak in?

• 26:52Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, my gosh.

• 26:53Speaker 02

  Hop over the fence. And we were like, but there's barbed wire you go around.

• 26:59Speaker 02

  And he was like, just do it, do it, it'll be an adventure. So, cause he didn't want to pay.

• 27:03Conan O'Brien?

  It's funny that he's defining this as street smarts.

• 27:07Speaker 01

  I know, these are just crimes.

• 27:08Conan O'Brien?

  These are crimes.

• 27:09Speaker 01

  These are just crimes.

• 27:10Conan O'Brien?

  These are crimes.

• 27:12Speaker 01

  This is all illegal.

• 27:13Conan O'Brien?

  But it must have, I mean.

• 27:15Speaker 02

  He was wild, he was fun. We would go to the movies, right? He didn't, I've told these stories before, but we would, we would go to the movie. And then after, at the mall or whatever, they would have those gates that they would pull down, like at Spencer's Gifts or the wig store or whatever. And then we saw a wig store coming out of the movies at the mall. And he was like, stick your little hand in there and try to pull out of it. And it was like, not only you have a little wrist to it.

• 27:38Conan O'Brien?

  He thought it was the claw game that you'd get in an arcade. It's like that. You just reach your hand in and if you can get it, you can. That's a jewelry store, but if you can get your hand in there.

• 27:48Speaker 02

  But we would do it. So I'd pull a wig, wig, wig from me and him and my friend Anne. And we'd put them on and we'd be like, Ty laughing, running out of the mall with our wigs on.

• 27:58Conan O'Brien?

  No one will ever catch us. They said, leaving the mall wearing three crazy wigs. Arrest that man on the Beehive Hairdo.

• 28:06Speaker 02

  No, there is 100 crazy stories like that. He was wild. He was a rule breaker. But yes, he was traditional. But understand the Catholic stuff was a little messed up because he is, he ended up admitting right before he died. I said, have you ever thought you might be gay? And he was like, most definitely.

• 28:23Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, wow.

• 28:24Speaker 02

  And so I think he was conflicted with his, he's not alive to say what he would have been, whether it be bisexual, homosexual. But I did say, have you ever thought you might be gay? When he was dying of cancer, 72, we were sitting at the Four Seasons Hotel. I was on a press conference. He's like, most definitely. And then we talked all about it. So I think the closeted homosexuality or bisexuality was mixed up with the Catholic stuff. Does that make sense?

• 28:52Conan O'Brien?

  Of course it does, yeah.

• 28:53Speaker 02

  Because he couldn't fully be who he wanted to be. So I think he had anger about that, not being able to express himself.

• 29:02Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 29:02Speaker 02

  So.

• 29:03Conan O'Brien?

  And then it comes out your elbow. It's a phrase I've always thought that I've heard used, which is if you can't admit some essential truth about yourself, you think you can suppress it, but it's coming out in some way.

• 29:16Speaker 02

  Yes, yes, exactly.

• 29:18Conan O'Brien?

  And that means stealing wigs through a grape.

• 29:21Speaker 02

  Exactly.

• 29:23Conan O'Brien?

  You, I heard this one story that you and one of your friends used to go to a hospital. To eat food for free.

• 29:31Speaker 02

  Mm hmm.

• 29:32Conan O'Brien?

  How would you do that?

• 29:33Speaker 02

  That's so fun. Well, that's kind of.

• 29:36Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, this was fun. Oh, yeah.

• 29:38Speaker 02

  No, I don't think we did it. No, we didn't. We would pay for the food, but it was kind of like, I still feel that way. It was if you've kind of felt in a little bit of a rut, I would do, I would try to throw myself into a different atmosphere. Like, oh, let's go, let's just go up to the hospital and we'll get lunch and we'll get like cream of broccoli soup and a split of tuna fish salad sandwich and we can watch the doctors. And it felt inspiring to be in a different type of atmosphere.

• 30:02Conan O'Brien?

  Of course.

• 30:02Speaker 02

  I still feel that same, I still feel that same way. And when I would, when I was first in LA and I was struggling as an actress, I would get kind of depressed because I was like, oh, this is so hard. It's such a hustle. I didn't realize how hard it was. So when I felt in kind of a blue mood, I would drive to Ontario, California. And I would go to the Wilford Academy School of Beauty and let the young students do my hair. And I would get breakfast at Molly's and then I would feel better, kind of throwing myself in a

• 30:31Conan O'Brien?

  Yes.

• 30:31Speaker 02

  new atmosphere, right?

• 30:33Conan O'Brien?

  I think it's.

• 30:33Speaker 02

  It's like traveling, but like little cheap ways to kind of open your mind.

• 30:37Conan O'Brien?

  Yes.

• 30:38Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 30:38Conan O'Brien?

  There is this concept among, you know, neurologists, you have to just keep challenging your brain.

• 30:44Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 30:45Conan O'Brien?

  Just keep changing it up.

• 30:46Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 30:46Conan O'Brien?

  And then one of the problems is people get into a rut.

• 30:48Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 30:49Conan O'Brien?

  And they're not challenged. So it sounds like the, almost the ultimate way to say, I'm gonna go to, uh, you know, I'm gonna hang out with some scuba divers, just to see what that's all about.

• 30:59Speaker 02

  Exactly.

• 31:00Conan O'Brien?

  Even though I haven't passed any classes and I could easily die underwater. I'm just gonna try it.

• 31:05Speaker 02

  Well, I love reading about brain science and stuff. And I do think if you do feel in that state, sometimes an action can help you kind of get out of your head. And I think, yeah, so I love reading about that. Also, if you ever felt like, you know, angry or something, if you do, or kind of supercharged, if you do a math problem, also like a subtraction problem, you know, that can also calm down your amygdala. Or if you, I just love the idea of thoughts and how you can change your thoughts and, um, stuff to do to help you get out of a little rut or something.

• 31:38Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 31:38Speaker 02

  Does that make sense?

• 31:39Conan O'Brien?

  Of course it does.

• 31:39Speaker 02

  I love reading about that.

• 31:40Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 31:41Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 31:41Conan O'Brien?

  Every now and then I'll be doing something and a friend say, "Well, this doesn't seem very like you." And I think, "Well, that's good."

• 31:46Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah.

• 31:47Conan O'Brien?

  Because I, I wanna try.

• 31:50Speaker 02

  Like, what kind of thing, for example?

• 31:51Conan O'Brien?

  Well, I don't talk about it much on the show, but for years I've, I drive a motorcycle. I ride a motorcycle and people don't know that. And I, I do it kind of like, I just like, you can be another person. You can put on a helmet and then you can just go. And as long as you have a credit card in your pocket, you can pay for gas and you can go anywhere.

• 32:11Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 32:11Conan O'Brien?

  And sometimes I just feel like I'm a different person when I'm doing that. And I take off for most of a day and come back and I, it's very therapeutic. Because I'm being someone else for a while, which I really like.

• 32:26Speaker 02

  Yes, I love that.

• 32:28Conan O'Brien?

  I also kill people at random.

• 32:30Speaker 02

  Oh, my God.

• 32:31Conan O'Brien?

  No, you can, you can. If, if it's completely random, nothing links you to the crime. And then you get away, but you have that feeling of like, "I'm choking the life out of you." You know, you know what I mean? And then you run a little quick burial, shallow grave, and then you run away. And then you're, you just feel like I was just that guy for a while. I've done that second one a lot.

• 32:54Speaker 02

  Oh, my God.

• 32:55Conan O'Brien?

  And I lied about the motorcycle.

• 32:59Conan O'Brien?

  I mostly just killed.

• 33:04Conan O'Brien?

  Anyway, try it, you're gonna really like it.

• 33:07Conan O'Brien?

  I know that you were here to talk about this project that you're doing with, with Will Ferrell.

• 33:12Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 33:12Conan O'Brien?

  And you two have such a unique chemistry and relationship that just goes back. Did you, had you worked together before SNL? Or was SNL the time that you came together?

• 33:24Speaker 02

  Oh, that was the time we came together. I worked at Melrose Baking Company. And Will was in the Groundlings Comedy School across the street. And we had a mutual friend named Patricia Cotter. And she said, "Molly, I really think you're gonna get along great with this guy, Will Ferrell." And I was like, "Bring him over to the coffee shop." So he came over and I was like, "Nice to meet you and what do you want?" And he was like, "I'll have a scone and a latte." And then we just started talking, we became friends. We've been friends for over 30 years. We, we did click right away, just like she said. And I got on SNL first and Will came shortly after. Yeah, we just, right away, we're like, clicked so much. And have been really close, close friends for so long.

• 34:01Conan O'Brien?

  And then you're on SNL together and everything else happens.

• 34:04Speaker 02

  Yeah, and I really did feel like, the press was kind of behind. And when we all first started, all us newcomers. They were kind of like, you know, really hard on us. And I remember thinking, wow, the press is really behind. They're just kind of copying old press. And Will to take the, like, to not feel bad, he would hang up the worst reviews about himself on his office door.

• 34:26Speaker 01

  Oh, man.

• 34:27Speaker 02

  Isn't that wild to just kind of take the, you know, to not feel ashamed about it? And I was like, God, good for him. I could never do that. But I remember thinking, they're wrong. And they don't, these people are really good. I'm like, this is good. So it helped me understand the press a little bit where I was like, wow, they're like outside and haven't caught up yet.

• 34:44Conan O'Brien?

  I remember first hearing about Will and someone said, oh, yeah, I've been hanging out with this new cast member, Will Ferrell. And the end of the season, he was dressed as a character on some sketch.

• 34:55Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 34:56Conan O'Brien?

  And he decided to just keep wearing the costume.

• 34:59Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 34:59Conan O'Brien?

  And I don't know if it was like a, you know, like a boiler suit or some kind of over the top weird costume, but he wore it for weeks and weeks. And a friend of mine said, yeah, I saw him at the National History Museum and he's still wearing that outfit.

• 35:14Speaker 02

  Oh, my God.

• 35:14Conan O'Brien?

  And I said, I don't know who that guy is, but I love that guy.

• 35:18Speaker 02

  So funny.

• 35:18Conan O'Brien?

  And this is before I knew him.

• 35:19Speaker 02

  Yeah, I'm liking the character that I know. He loves doing that kind of stuff. And it's so, he's really just entertaining himself. And it's just so, he, this is so fun and he's so creative. And I think Will, too, is more serious, too, than people would expect. Like, we know his big comedy side, but I know his more serious side. And it's so.

• 35:39Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, it's a real drag. Yeah, it's awful. No, I know what you mean.

• 35:43Speaker 02

  Do you know what I mean?

• 35:44Conan O'Brien?

  I think what's tough, and I think it's the same thing with you, too, is people would assume you or Will are just kooky.

• 35:52Speaker 02

  Yeah, I know.

• 35:53Conan O'Brien?

  All the time and over the top entertainment machines. And both of you are very soulful, real people.

• 36:02Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 36:02Conan O'Brien?

  You have a very serious side to you.

• 36:04Speaker 02

  Yes, yes, very.

• 36:06Conan O'Brien?

  And do you find that there are people, when they first meet you, who think they're going to meet the Molly Shannon, who's going to throw herself into a bunch of chairs? And then they find someone who's really talking to them seriously about an issue?

• 36:19Speaker 02

  Probably, yeah. I think, because I think I am more serious. I really like to get to know people and if I have time. And I think I'm more a one on one. And I think I'm shyer than people would think, too. But, yeah, I do feel that a little bit, too. Yeah, and the whole thing too with critics, like what you were saying too, I feel like I'm very conscious too of like, God, you could so easily, you know, the whole like showbiz is such a hustle and I just don't like getting into that thing of like going back like you're good, you're bad, you're good, you're bad. I think I can really repeat like childhood patterns and so I try to be healthier. You know, when you think about life and how lucky we are to be healthy, I just, I just don't, I don't really worry about that. I try not to get into that too much.

• 36:58Conan O'Brien?

  Don't you think having a family helps?

• 37:00Speaker 02

  Oh, my God, it helps so much. It's just my everything. Like, I'm just so glad I'm alive to be there and do it. It's, it affects every decision in my life, my children. I want to be there. I love being a mom. That's my number one. So it makes showbiz less, ah, I'm very, I'm pretty laid, very laid back about it, I would say.

• 37:17Conan O'Brien?

  You have, yeah, you have like a solid foundation, like a solid basement foundation of this is what matters.

• 37:24Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 37:25Conan O'Brien?

  And then, you know, other stuff can come and go.

• 37:27Speaker 02

  Yeah, and I feel like I just don't want to do that to myself, like rile myself up like that, like never feeling good enough or that you're only as good as your last thing. I'm like, oh, enough, you know, I want to, I feel like I'm proud of myself and I try not to have to need that so much from the outside. Does that make sense?

• 37:45Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 37:45Speaker 02

  Otherwise, you just feel so unhealthy. And I feel like there can be a nice place to be healthy and be creative and not like, not, not worry too much about that.

• 37:54Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 37:54Speaker 02

  I worked hard in therapy to not rile myself up like that.

• 37:59Conan O'Brien?

  What kind of therapy did you do?

• 38:00Speaker 02

  I mean, I've done EMDR and do you know what that is?

• 38:04Conan O'Brien?

  No, I just said, mm hmm.

• 38:07Conan O'Brien?

  Look like I know what's going on.

• 38:09Speaker 02

  It's more for like trauma where you do like bilateral stimulation. So if you were nervous, you do the beep, beep, beep, beep, like the little, there's like a buzzer where you would, you would hold the buzzer and it, and you go back into, you would, you could pick like supercharged moments in your life, like a top five where you're like, and feeling scared or whatever.

• 38:28Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 38:28Speaker 02

  And the bilateral stimulation kind of will bring it from like a 10 to like a three. So you slowly kind of can reprocess this, these trauma.

• 38:38Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 38:38Speaker 02

  And so it really, it's, it's great.

• 38:40Conan O'Brien?

  Did you ever do cognitive?

• 38:42Speaker 02

  Cognitive, um, I mean, yes, yes.

• 38:44Conan O'Brien?

  Cognitive is so fascinating because they say, um, if you have a good imagination,

• 38:49Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 38:50Conan O'Brien?

  it can be great, or you have also have a great imagination for bad things.

• 38:53Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 38:54Conan O'Brien?

  So my, my career is over. I suck. I'm terrible.

• 38:57Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah.

• 38:58Conan O'Brien?

  All these things David writes to me every day.

• 38:59Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 39:00Speaker 02

  Oh, my God.

• 39:01Speaker 03

  Every morning.

• 39:01Conan O'Brien?

  Just little memos.

• 39:02Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 39:02Speaker 02

  Oh, my God.

• 39:03Conan O'Brien?

  But I start to spiral and go down. And one of the things I learned is write it all down on a piece of paper.

• 39:08Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 39:09Conan O'Brien?

  Walk away from it for 10 minutes. Come back and then read the piece of paper.

• 39:13Speaker 02

  During a worry time.

• 39:15Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 39:15Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 39:16Conan O'Brien?

  And you read it in like, I'm the worst person who ever lived. And I go, well, no, Stalin was bad.

• 39:22Conan O'Brien?

  Hitler. I mean, yes, I'm bad, but I'm not that bad. And then, you know.

• 39:26Speaker 02

  You find evidence contrary to the beliefs?

• 39:28Conan O'Brien?

  But also, a lot of the things you've written down just look silly.

• 39:31Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 39:32Conan O'Brien?

  You know, like, they just look ridiculous. And so I find that to be, um, and it's helped me talk to my kids if they have anxiety.

• 39:41Speaker 02

  That's wonderful.

• 39:42Conan O'Brien?

  But I'm always looking for the, another thing, you know, because you, okay, I've got those tools, but I'm always looking for the next thing.

• 39:49Speaker 02

  Yes, I love that. I, I, I love that kind of stuff, though. But that does make sense, the act of writing it, that you can put it aside. And then when you go back and look at it, you're, you know, you're like, yeah, I just, I just wrote a great book called Social Anxiety for the Overthinker. And it talked about that same thing. And I, I love that kind of stuff. I talk to myself out loud. One of my kids overheard me. I'm, I don't want to talk. They're private and stuff. But I was talking to myself in my office and that one of them overheard me and I was like, just going through these files. It was kind of tedious. And I was like, you're doing a great job, Malls, out loud.

• 40:25Speaker 02

  And one of my kids heard me and they were like, yeah, they yelled over the house, you're doing a great job, Malls. But I, I, I wasn't aware that I was doing like a kind of Long Island co-talk, literally talking to myself out loud, telling myself I was doing a good job. I don't know. It just came out. You're doing a great job, Malls. Isn't that?

• 40:46Conan O'Brien?

  I love that.

• 40:47Speaker 02

  But no, I love, I love positive self-talk, creative visualization. I feel like life is hard, like any tools that can help you. For me, it's exercise. Like, I have to.

• 40:57Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, huge, yeah.

• 40:58Speaker 02

  I feel like I'm in great shape, but it's not really about exercise. It's about, it just makes me feel so happy, so good. I sleep better. It just makes me relax.

• 41:08Conan O'Brien?

  Do you do this?

• 41:09Speaker 02

  What?

• 41:09Conan O'Brien?

  Because exercise releases all these endorphins.

• 41:11Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 41:12Conan O'Brien?

  And so what I have found is, I'll get on a treadmill and I'll run really hard. It's like, wow, I did, I just did 40 minutes on the treadmill, really, you know, really going all out and I'm sweating and I get off of it and I'm, I'm euphoric.

• 41:25Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 41:26Conan O'Brien?

  I am euphoric. And when I've been on the treadmill, I've had all these ideas. It's like, I'm gonna, you know, I'm gonna learn how to play the oboe and I'm gonna become a really good oboe player. Like, I'll come up with all these ideas for what I want to do and I'm gonna take a woodworking course and I'm gonna, I'm gonna build a sideboard and give it to my wife on our anniversary. It's gonna be made out of maple. And, and then I'll play the oboe while she's open. I'll have all these ideas.

• 41:50Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 41:51Conan O'Brien?

  And I'll start looking up stuff online, like oboe classes, carpentry classes. And then I get in my car, I drive here to the studio, I get to work and I think, I don't want to do any of that. I don't want to do any of that because my heart rate came down and all of this great stuff that gets released. So, yeah, I have learned, don't make any calls.

• 42:13Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 42:14Conan O'Brien?

  Don't make any plans after the exercise period. Just wait a little bit, but it feels so good.

• 42:19Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah. And that is so, I love it. That's great. That, I love that you have that inspiration, though, and while you're exercising.

• 42:26Conan O'Brien?

  If I ever call you right after a workout, just don't listen to me. Because I'm gonna say like, you and I should get married. We should leave our spouses and marry each other. And I'm gonna take a woodworking course. And I'm gonna build you a house, Molly. It's gonna be the bestest house you ever saw.

• 42:41Speaker 02

  That is so funny.

• 42:42Conan O'Brien?

  And then I get to work and your husband's like, what the fuck, man? Sorry, man. I just had a really good exercise session. And I love Molly.

• 42:50Speaker 02

  Conan, where do you get your work drive from? Like, how did you learn how to do that when you were fresh out of college? Like, is that from your dad or your mom?

• 42:59Conan O'Brien?

  Work was prioritized when I was a kid, but I don't think all of us learned that lesson in my family, but I certainly, I don't know, I, I, I decided, I remember kind of thinking like in fourth grade, like, I'm just gonna, I didn't know what I was good at. I had no idea that I'd be good at anything. So I just decided, well, if I work really hard, that'll make up for the fact that I'm not good at anything. I remember thinking that. And so I just started, it's not a cool, you started off by saying, I feel so cool. I'm not a cool person. I was, I just worked really hard when I was a kid in, in a way that makes me a little sad now. I'm really worried about stuff.

• 43:44Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 43:45Conan O'Brien?

  And the way I combated my anxiety was to prepare really hard for things. And then that yielded these benefits and then people later on said, you're really smart. And I thought, I think I just work really hard. So, but I have, I have a work ethic and I like to make things and I like to work with people and make things. And so I think that's, that's kind of just part of who I am now.

• 44:12Speaker 02

  That's great. Sometimes I think about show business, I'm like, you have to be crazy. It's like, I think, like, you know, you're from Boston, I'm from Cleveland. Like, I just think, oh my God, what did I think coming out here, not knowing anybody? Like, you have to be kind of crazy to think that you're gonna, come on, let's, you know, you have to, don't you think?

• 44:29Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 44:29Speaker 02

  I mean, if you really were to, if I were to really have known how much work it would be and what I would have to do and the somersaults and backflips and what was gonna, I'm like, oh my God, I can't believe I did it, you know?

• 44:41Conan O'Brien?

  No, when I look back now, yes, of course. I look back now and I think, well, I graduated from this really good school and I did well. And I was like, okay, well, I'm going to LA with my friend Greg. We took a People's Express flight out there. I don't know if you know, People's Express was like, if you had no money, you flew People's Express, you gave them some cash. There was no, you know, it was like.

• 45:03Speaker 02

  You give them the credit card on the plane.

• 45:05Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, it was like flying a barn. You could get on a barn and fly. Uh, they put wings on a barn and you flew to LA. We took a red eye and Greg Daniels, who's gone on to create every great show.

• 45:16Speaker 02

  He did okay.

• 45:17Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, he did. Yeah, he did fine. I go to Greg for loans. We just had this goofy existence, but the only thing I can say is it was like a salmon swimming upstream.

• 45:28Speaker 02

  Yeah. And did you come out, you guys leased an apartment for a year and just, did you take jobs while you were taking comedy classes?

• 45:35Conan O'Brien?

  We did. Uh, well, we had a, we had an entry level job. We had a, a job at, uh, this show. It was on cable, it was on HBO back when if you wanted to watch HBO, you checked into a hotel or a motel. Cause no one I knew had HBO. But we worked on this show called Not Necessarily the News and we had a sort of a entry level job at that. But then we would take other jobs. Um, I took some kooky other jobs.

• 46:00Speaker 02

  So did you come out with just a small amount of money too?

• 46:02Conan O'Brien?

  I love your podcast. This is.

• 46:04Speaker 02

  I know.

• 46:05Conan O'Brien?

  I like doing the Molly Center podcast.

• 46:07Speaker 02

  I have so many questions for all of you.

• 46:08Conan O'Brien?

  Did I do what?

• 46:09Speaker 02

  Did you come out with like $3,000 or did you have, how much money did you come out with to LA?

• 46:14Conan O'Brien?

  I can't remember what I had. I don't, I didn't, we knew that we had this gig. We just didn't know if it was gonna last.

• 46:20Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 46:20Conan O'Brien?

  So we were under the impression that we were on like a three week tryout. I think, we just didn't know.

• 46:25Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 46:26Conan O'Brien?

  And so we came out very ready to leave immediately. Or that was what we kind of told ourselves. This, this isn't working. We can do something else. But I remembered thinking, I'm not leaving.

• 46:36Speaker 02

  That's so great. I love that. I didn't know all that.

• 46:38Conan O'Brien?

  And I kept thinking, I just wanna have a girlfriend. That was the part. Yeah. And no one would talk to me.

• 46:45Speaker 02

  That's so sweet.

• 46:46Conan O'Brien?

  Well, it was just very sad. Uh, let's talk about the hawk because you and Will Ferrell are together.

• 46:52Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 46:53Conan O'Brien?

  And again, which is as it should be, Will is out there doing all kinds of insane stunts. Which I love. This is the Will we love to see. He's out there a hundred percent committing to being the hawk.

• 47:06Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 47:07Conan O'Brien?

  Who is this down and out, aging. PGA golfer.

• 47:11Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 47:12Conan O'Brien?

  And you are his ex-wife.

• 47:14Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm.

• 47:15Conan O'Brien?

  And tell us a little bit about that relationship.

• 47:17Speaker 02

  I'm kind of frustrated with him because I feel disappointed. I'm like, oh, these nutty golfers and, you know, I, I kind of regret. I'm like, I just don't, I'm being very hard on him and.

• 47:28Conan O'Brien?

  And he was great in the past.

• 47:29Speaker 02

  He was great in the past, in his glory days, but now I'm like, oh, God, I'm so sick of your bullshit. You know, I'm really tough and I kind of want to do my own thing and not rely on him. And I want to pull myself out of this, these world of golfers, these crazy people.

• 47:43Conan O'Brien?

  All-consuming that world, yeah.

• 47:44Speaker 02

  That how they can compartmentalize things and, and, but we have a son. But yeah, so, but we really do love one another. We're just kind of in a little rocky period, but we, we truly do love one another deep down. And yeah, it's about our relationship, our family. And we have a son who's a pro golfer and.

• 48:02Conan O'Brien?

  And who's really good.

• 48:03Speaker 02

  Who's really good, yes, he's excellent. So, yeah, so it's just, it's just that whole world. And, um, yeah, we had a blast shooting it. It was so much fun.

• 48:11Conan O'Brien?

  Do you, I am just going to imagine that when you two get together for a project, it's right back to, could be the third week at SNL that you're together.

• 48:18Speaker 02

  Exactly, it is like that.

• 48:19Conan O'Brien?

  There's a lot of tomfoolery, chicanery.

• 48:21Speaker 02

  Yes, yes, yes.

• 48:23Conan O'Brien?

  Skullduggery.

• 48:24Speaker 02

  Yeah, we, we had one day where we were shooting and there was a little stunt woman who was hired. And, um, her name's Sandy Gimple. But Will said, he was like, Molly, did you see when Sandy was taking a rest on the ground during when we weren't shooting? I was like, well, of course I noticed, you know, she's like, flat on the ground, sleeping. And we notice the same things that we think are funny.

• 48:47Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 48:47Speaker 02

  Or, you know, it's just, it's an absolute joy. We talk about our kids. I'm really close to Will's mom and dad. Will was really close to my dad. It just feels like family in all honesty. And Will is so professional. This is what I always tell people. He is the most professional, most prepared, most thoughtful, you know, just like, he's just the best. You better be on your A-game because he, Farrell is ready to go.

• 49:11Conan O'Brien?

  But see, that's another misconception. People would see a Will Ferrell or you, Molly, and they would think, well, they're just wacky. And they get together and they're crazy together and then they roll it.

• 49:19Speaker 02

  No.

• 49:20Conan O'Brien?

  Understand that there's just an immense amount of preparation and professionalism that's required to get to that space. And then there can be some improvisation, but that's like the frosting on the cupcake.

• 49:32Speaker 02

  Yes, exactly. He's sitting there and he's looking, and he can look at the scene and go, yeah, we could lose that. I guess I could cut that. You know, he's looking at the writing very technically and excellent, you know? So it is just all those things, but he is there before everyone, ready to go and memorizes really fast, too. Like, he'll have these giant scenes where I'm like, wow, you started memorizing that last night? That's hard. You know, he's just a pro. And so it just feels so fun, just working with your friend. It's the greatest. I feel like there's no greater joy than when you get to work with people you love. It just doesn't even feel like work. That's truly how I feel.

• 50:12Conan O'Brien?

  Well, that's how it, you know, it's so many people in the world have to do a job that they don't maybe love or have a connection to.

• 50:20Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah.

• 50:20Conan O'Brien?

  And anyone who gets to do anything like what we're doing. And it's not just in the arts or in comedy or entertainment. It's just, you know, people that really love what they do. That is the ultimate gift.

• 50:33Speaker 02

  It is the ultimate.

• 50:34Conan O'Brien?

  Greatest way to go through life.

• 50:35Speaker 02

  Yeah, and you should never, I think it's so important to not, to enjoy where you are and not be like, oh, I'm only as good as this last thing. It's just, I try to.

• 50:44Conan O'Brien?

  Doesn't that come with age, though?

• 50:45Speaker 02

  It comes with age. I try to just enjoy, like, I'm like, if you can't be happy, I had a, you know, when you think about life, how precious it is and health, I just think, I don't want to live like that anymore. I had a, my childhood was up and down. You're good, you're bad, you're good, you're bad. It's like, I'm not going to do that anymore. I don't like that. Life's too short. So what I want to say is, yes, it makes you appreciate, I don't like buying into that you're only as good as your last thing. I think if you do work that is meaningful to you and you love it, that's all that matters. Because like I said, I've seen people become superstars who feel like they're only as good as their last movie. And I'm like, I don't want to live like that. Like, if they're like that, I should just enjoy my level where I am. Because there is, do you know what I'm saying?

• 51:29Conan O'Brien?

  Of course. Well, there's also, there's a lot we can't control.

• 51:33Speaker 02

  Yes, yes.

• 51:34Conan O'Brien?

  If you're quote, "only as good as your last thing that you did", you have very little control over that.

• 51:40Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 51:40Conan O'Brien?

  You know, there have been things I've been involved in that I thought were just the most amazing thing ever. And it didn't, no one talks to me about it, it doesn't go anywhere. And then there are other things where everyone just loved it and I don't remember the difference. There's just other occurrence, things that are happening. This is a very, this isn't, I'll say this, you came in with this energy.

• 52:00Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 52:02Conan O'Brien?

  This, you're not being punished, you look very upset.

• 52:04Speaker 02

  I know, I know.

• 52:06Conan O'Brien?

  You come with this energy that I'm just gonna call, this is gonna sound very LA and crunchy, but you come in with this energy that's very healing.

• 52:14Speaker 02

  Oh.

• 52:15Conan O'Brien?

  It's true.

• 52:15Speaker 01

  Very true.

• 52:16Conan O'Brien?

  And very positive, and I just absolutely love talking to you. You have always been, I mean, you came on my show so many times through, over the years. You would always come on and be just outrageously entertaining. But I also knew that you were the highest quality person. You really are.

• 52:42Speaker 02

  Thank you, Conan.

• 52:43Conan O'Brien?

  And so to have you, and you coming in today and just everybody is irradiated in this Molly Shannon glow.

• 52:49Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 52:49Conan O'Brien?

  It's a lovely thing.

• 52:51Speaker 02

  Sweet. Well, you know, thank you, Conan, that means so much. Well, I, I feel like I could almost get choked up. You know that I feel the same way about you. And I remember two years ago, you were so nice. Conan's exactly the same all the time. Like you treat everyone with respect and kindness and you make everyone feel good. You have that ability, that gift, you were that way with my father. But I wanted to say too, that if I get fucked up about comedy or thinking too much about competition, or sure, everybody has it, oh, he's doing that, that, that, that. I just think when I really wanna get back to be grounded, I think really I do it to make people feel good. Like I like when people feel happy. They're like, I love that. That is really all it's about. You won't get fucked up. It's a, it's, I'm an entertainer. It is a giving, it is, do you know what I'm saying?

• 53:35Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 53:35Speaker 02

  And if you think about it that way, like a service almost, then you're not gonna be so self-centered about it. Does that make sense?

• 53:41Conan O'Brien?

  Yes.

• 53:42Speaker 02

  And I wanna enjoy my life on earth as an artist, not be like, you know, I don't wanna be that way. Competitive or, you know what I mean?

• 53:50Conan O'Brien?

  Exactly. I do know what you mean. But I still want others to fail. You know what I'm saying? I want people who aren't me in comedy to fail.

• 54:00Speaker 01

  No, that's not what Molly said.

• 54:01Conan O'Brien?

  Wait, is that not what you?

• 54:03Speaker 01

  No, that is the complete opposite.

• 54:04Conan O'Brien?

  I agreed with what Molly said, and all I'm adding is,

• 54:07Speaker 01

  No, no, no, no.

• 54:07Conan O'Brien?

  But I want others to fail.

• 54:09Speaker 01

  Yeah, no, you missed the point completely.

• 54:11Conan O'Brien?

  I want to do better, not because of my own abilities. I want them to fail so that I rise.

• 54:17Speaker 01

  I see, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, still, still completely not what you said.

• 54:20Conan O'Brien?

  Okay, well, whatever. I think we pretty much said the same thing.

• 54:22Speaker 01

  It's okay. You'll get there.

• 54:23Speaker 02

  Conan, listen, getting back to the Irish thing. Because my Irishing was that my dad could be tough, you know, this and that. My mom died when I was little. So much of me getting into it was a bit of a painful thing. Like, my dad really would have loved to have been an actor. My mom died. I thought, well, if I get famous enough, I'll bring my mom back from the dead. It was very sad stuff. And I still have to ask myself, do you really still want to do this? Is this really you? Do you, do you, you know, I really have to check in with that, you know? But that's my point, going back to the Irish stuff of it, was it had some dark stuff.

• 54:58Conan O'Brien?

  Of course it does.

• 54:58Speaker 02

  You know what I mean?

• 54:59Conan O'Brien?

  Really dark.

• 55:00Speaker 02

  Do you relate to that?

• 55:01Conan O'Brien?

  But also, of course I do. Yes, there's also the, am I doing this because in some way I'm not well? Like, what's the whole wanting to make everyone laugh? Is there an unhealthy part of this? Is there a part of this which is revenge? Like, I can make everyone happy because maybe some people weren't happy, but now I'll make everyone happy. And is this unhealthy? And if you get healthy, does that mean you can't do this anymore? All the dark stuff.

• 55:29Speaker 02

  I had, I just got my star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, and I feel...

• 55:32Conan O'Brien?

  Yes, and congratulations. And Will gave the speech.

• 55:35Speaker 02

  Will gave a speech. That was so nice. But I was gonna say, I get very shy when people have to show up for me. That makes me shy. I can go be a celebrity by myself, alone, but if people have to come for me, I get like, oh, God, I'm gonna disappoint you. Or even at SNL, Will would always bring tons of friends to the show. He'd have like, oh, you know, he has so many friends. I was always like, I would prefer strangers because I felt like, if a friend's gonna come, they're gonna get disappointed, and they're gonna wanna leave.

• 56:00Conan O'Brien?

  This is me, I mean, everything you're saying is... If there's a thing where people, which hasn't happened a lot, but something like the Twain Award where people come for Conan O'Brien, I was mortified. Really mortified that like, people, I don't want people to have to get, no, they're flying in, they're flying in, no, and they're gonna prepare, they have to prepare stuff. And I had done it for other people and felt fine doing that, because I loved the people I was showing up for.

• 56:26Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 56:26Conan O'Brien?

  But I couldn't see it the other way, so I was kind of mortified.

• 56:30Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 56:30Conan O'Brien?

  And then, um, everything you're saying, I always, when I was doing the late night show, or any show, and people were like, "Ian, guess what, your friend's," I'm like, "No, no, what do you mean, they're here?"

• 56:41Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 56:41Conan O'Brien?

  "Oh no, now the show has to really be good."

• 56:43Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah, because if it's a stranger, it's like, there's nothing, you know?

• 56:47Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 56:47Speaker 02

  Yeah. When I would do SNL, if I did invite a friend, I have to give them a list of rules. I was like, "Don't," you know, because they'd be like, "More Molly." And I was like, "Oh my God, like, really don't. If you move a hard one, you're just gonna make me feel bad."

• 56:59Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 57:00Speaker 02

  So I had, I had like a list of rules, like, "Save it, you can't save this." Like, "I already am hard on myself, like, so no more, more Molly in the show." It's like, well, of course.

• 57:10Conan O'Brien?

  My least favorite is occasionally, there's an etiquette, when you come off a show, I know, first of all, you're always gonna be great, but no matter what, "Oh my God, great show, Molly," that's what you do. And that's what you would say to me if I came offstage.

• 57:22Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 57:22Conan O'Brien?

  I love people that come up and go, "How do you think it went?"

• 57:24Speaker 02

  Oh my God. Is that right?

• 57:28Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, I bet. "How do you think it went? I don't know. How do you think it went? I'm just curious what you thought. Oh, well, I guess I should get out of the business." All right, we have to wrap this up.

• 57:38Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 57:38Conan O'Brien?

  But Molly, uh, I adore you, I love you, you're so great, and you live in this neighborhood, so can we get lunch? Wouldn't that be nice? Let's do a lunch sometime.

• 57:47Speaker 02

  Yes, it will be very serious.

• 57:49Conan O'Brien?

  Serious lunch.

• 57:51Speaker 02

  No joking, Conan.

• 57:52Conan O'Brien?

  So serious.

• 57:53Speaker 02

  I'm gonna break you down, baby. No bits.

• 57:58Conan O'Brien?

  You know, winning an award, that's a big achievement, right?

• 58:01Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 58:01Conan O'Brien?

  Every now and then in life, maybe something nice like that comes your way. Winning them consistently is almost impossible. It just doesn't happen. You know? Well, guess what? Winning five times in six years? You know what that sounds like to me? Sustained excellence.

• 58:15Speaker 01

  Nice.

• 58:16Conan O'Brien?

  Hyundai has done just that, earning the title of America's best SUV brand for 2026 from US News and World Report. You are a very happy Hyundai driver.

• 58:24Speaker 01

  I drive a Hyundai Palisade and I love my car. I love it. I love driving it around.

• 58:29Conan O'Brien?

  I've been tooling around in an Ioniq 5N, which I love. Beautiful car. Well, listen, whether you need an SUV for everyday life, your next big adventure, or extra room for family and friends, Hyundai has an option for you. The Tucson Hybrid is loaded with technology and built for everyday life. The Santa Fe Hybrid is fully capable and ready for adventure. The Palisade, that's yours, right?

• 58:48Speaker 01

  Hello!

• 58:49Conan O'Brien?

  They're gonna rename that the Sona. The Palisade Hybrid, yeah, delivers premium capability and class-leading interior space. With available, I have this memorized, H-Track all-wheel drive, up to an EPA-estimated 619 miles of range on vehicles like the Palisade Hybrid and Hyundai's industry-leading warranty. It's easy to see why Hyundai continues to deliver the quality, innovation, technology, and value drivers expect from an award-winning brand. View US News Best Cars at cars.usnews.com and call 562-314-4603 for complete details.

• 59:23Conan O'Brien?

  Who do you shop for first on the holiday, Sona? Was it, do you shop for the kids or do you shop for tax?

• 59:27Speaker 01

  My kids.

• 59:27Conan O'Brien?

  Okay.

• 59:28Speaker 01

  Or Oki. Or my dog.

• 59:30Conan O'Brien?

  And then your husband is last. Well, guess what? It's that time of year. You feel that, you smell that cinnamon cider in the air? Do you smell that?

• 59:39Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 59:40Conan O'Brien?

  And you see pumpkins around, people buying turkeys. A little early to buy a turkey. Doesn't matter. Holidays? I would say it's just around the corner, but that's a cliche. It's very nearby in the cupboard. Well, guess what? Amazon delivers joy with low prices on the gifts you want, even this early in the season. So get ahead of the season. Shop early gifts, top picks, holiday decor, and advent calendars at low prices. Get a head start on holiday gifting with Amazon's low prices. Shop now at amazon.com/holiday.

• 1:00:16Conan O'Brien?

  So now, you have to admit, the holidays, it's really about hanging with the people you love.

• 1:00:22Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:00:22Conan O'Brien?

  And getting to be yourself. Not going to some stuffy holiday party where you need to conform to what the man wants you to think about the holidays.

• 1:00:31Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:00:32Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, it's about being yourself. Turn your holiday time into Miller time by enjoying a Miller Lite in a place where you're free to enjoy yourself. On a walk with a cousin? With a cousin? Why are they getting all specific about it?

• 1:00:43Speaker 01

  Because it's family.

• 1:00:43Conan O'Brien?

  But what about a niece or a nephew?

• 1:00:45Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:00:47Conan O'Brien?

  Like a walk with an ex-wife? I don't know. I mean, they're just throwing, that's a weird, they just made a very specific choice.

• 1:00:54Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:00:54Conan O'Brien?

  Now's the time for those unexpected holiday side guests and enjoy a great tasting light beer. 'Tis Miller time, as Dickens wrote. Miller Lite is brewed for taste, the taste you can depend on. The original light beer since 1975 and still iconic more than 50 years later. I like to be with my bros, my chums, my posse. Crack open a Miller Lite, take a swig, a sip, look around and see my friends. We've known each other forever and we're just hanging out.

• 1:01:22Speaker 01

  Yeah, you guys are just doing chest bumps and high-fiving.

• 1:01:24Conan O'Brien?

  Miller Lite is great taste done right. Go to millerlite.com/conan to find delivery options near you, or you can pick up some Miller Lite pretty much anywhere they sell beer. 'Tis Miller time. Celebrate responsibly Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin. 96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces.

• 1:01:41Speaker 02

  Bits!

• 1:01:41Conan O'Brien?

  No bits?

• 1:01:42Speaker 01

  No.

• 1:01:43Conan O'Brien?

  It's like a, it's like a no shoes, no shirt, no service.

• 1:01:46Speaker 01

  I know.

• 1:01:47Conan O'Brien?

  No bits.

• 1:01:48Speaker 01

  Can you do it?

• 1:01:49Conan O'Brien?

  I think I could do it.

• 1:01:50Speaker 02

  It will be deadly serious, so get ready.

• 1:01:53Conan O'Brien?

  It's gonna be my dinner with Molly. Like, my dinner with, it's just gonna be the same thing, like, serious. All right.

• 1:02:00Speaker 02

  This was a joy, a pleasure. You, I love this office.

• 1:02:04Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 1:02:04Speaker 02

  Conan, what could be better?

• 1:02:06Speaker 01

  Everyone loves you.

• 1:02:06Speaker 02

  I mean, this is, so thank you so much.

• 1:02:08Conan O'Brien?

  Yes, more on that.

• 1:02:09Speaker 01

  No, everybody loves you.

• 1:02:10Speaker 02

  Thank you, that is so nice.

• 1:02:12Speaker 01

  Molly Shannon Day is a fun day.

• 1:02:13Conan O'Brien?

  I've tried to start shit, you know, start saying, I've said shit about you to try and get negative stuff out there, and it doesn't take.

• 1:02:21Speaker 01

  No, no, no.

• 1:02:22Conan O'Brien?

  No one, people, I'm just like, you know, Molly Shannon, I think she's just gonna, they're like, no! What?

• 1:02:26Speaker 01

  Yeah. He talks so much shit about you.

• 1:02:29Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, and it doesn't take. It won't take.

• 1:02:31Speaker 02

  That's hysterical.

• 1:02:32Conan O'Brien?

  And I'm gonna try again later today.

• 1:02:34Speaker 01

  Yeah, good luck.

• 1:02:35Conan O'Brien?

  All right.

• 1:02:35Speaker 02

  Thank you for having me.

• 1:02:36Conan O'Brien?

  Wow!

• 1:02:47Conan O'Brien?

  My assistant, David Hopping, has entered the room and you have an announcement to make, you said?

• 1:02:53Speaker 04

  Yes, so, um-

• 1:02:55Conan O'Brien?

  I do not know what this is, by the way.

• 1:02:56Speaker 04

  Oh, you're- I think, I think you're gonna like it. So-

• 1:03:00Conan O'Brien?

  Your doctor just called.

• 1:03:01Speaker 04

  Every once in a while.

• 1:03:02Conan O'Brien?

  And he says the tests are back and you're hilarious.

• 1:03:07Speaker 04

  No. Okay, so every once in a while, I will get tagged in different TikToks about Conan. And last night I opened up TikTok and I had like a bunch of notifications. So I clicked it and we all know Toy Story 5 just came out and you play Smarty Pants. There is an entire side of TikTok that find themselves attracted to Smarty Pants. What? And it's not like just a few. These videos have like over 100,000 likes each and all the comments are about how weird it is to be attracted to-

• 1:03:36Speaker 01

  What the fuck?

• 1:03:37Speaker 04

  A potty training toy.

• 1:03:38Speaker 01

  What?

• 1:03:39Speaker 04

  And I, I sent Eduardo some of them to pull up to show you.

• 1:03:41Conan O'Brien?

  Let's check this out. Multiple levels.

• 1:03:43Speaker 01

  Ew!

• 1:03:45Conan O'Brien?

  Hold on.

• 1:03:50Speaker 01

  Oh, god! It says, it says, "Hear me out"?

• 1:03:56Speaker 04

  148,000 likes on that video?

• 1:03:59Speaker 01

  Oh my god!

• 1:04:00Speaker 04

  Uh, excuse me.

• 1:04:02Conan O'Brien?

  Does it not occur to you that maybe this was my intention? When I brought this character to life? No kidding.

• 1:04:07Speaker 04

  What?

• 1:04:07Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 1:04:08Speaker 04

  Walk us through your process.

• 1:04:09Conan O'Brien?

  Well, I have a lot of riz, I think is what the kids say. Is that right, Sona?

• 1:04:13Speaker 01

  I don't know. I'm not well.

• 1:04:15Conan O'Brien?

  You're not well?

• 1:04:16Speaker 01

  This is, this is so gross and disturbing. This is like-

• 1:04:20Conan O'Brien?

  I didn't see this one coming. I have to be hon- I tried to, you guys say, I tried for a second to go with it and be like, yeah, so, and then I realized I can't.

• 1:04:28Speaker 01

  Oh, there's more?

• 1:04:29Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, here we go, here we go, here we go.

• 1:04:31Speaker 01

  You want Smarty Pants?

• 1:04:40Speaker 01

  Oh god, no, the internet needs to go away.

• 1:04:44Speaker 04

  I know you're not supposed to kink shame, but shame on you.

• 1:04:46Speaker 01

  Yes, no, yeah, you can, for this, we can kink shame.

• 1:04:49Conan O'Brien?

  Really? This is kink shameable?

• 1:04:51Speaker 01

  This is kink shameable. You are a potty training toy in a children's movie and people are like, I, what are, like, what, what are we doing? Like, there's so many hot cartoon characters out there.

• 1:05:02Speaker 04

  David.

• 1:05:02Speaker 01

  Oh, you do tell. There's a lot of hot cartoon characters out there.

• 1:05:06Conan O'Brien?

  Are you saying, so you're saying it's not just that I'm a cartoon character, it's that there are other far more worthy

• 1:05:11Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 1:05:11Conan O'Brien?

  sexual

• 1:05:12Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 1:05:13Conan O'Brien?

  Let's hear who they are.

• 1:05:15Speaker 01

  Off the top of my head? I mean, this is not in a cartoon, but recently I was reading a comic book and I was like, when did Superman get like this hot? Like, there's been a lot of illustrated characters I have responded to recently. I just, I can't think off the but not fucking smarty pants. Not that. That is ridiculous. I'm sorry.

• 1:05:36Conan O'Brien?

  You can't see it? What about the, there's a section where smarty pants has my hair, you know? It's a dream sequence, a fantasy sequence.

• 1:05:43Speaker 01

  Are you asking me if them adding one of your characteristics makes it more attractive to me?

• 1:05:49Conan O'Brien?

  That's my, yes, yes, Senator, that is my question.

• 1:05:52Speaker 01

  The answer is a hard no, and it's, uh, it's even more no.

• 1:06:01Conan O'Brien?

  I yield my time and I also ask for a weapon to kill myself.

• 1:06:07Conan O'Brien?

  I know that doesn't usually happen in a Senate Subcommittee hearing.

• 1:06:09Speaker 01

  No.

• 1:06:10Conan O'Brien?

  But if there's a weapon present, I will use it.

• 1:06:12Speaker 01

  You will go into a warm bath? Arrested. No, this is weird.

• 1:06:15Conan O'Brien?

  Okay, so.

• 1:06:16Speaker 01

  I don't know, no.

• 1:06:17Conan O'Brien?

  Uh, David, give us your thoughts, because, you know, you discovered this.

• 1:06:20Speaker 04

  I was shocked when I right-clicked on it to see what this was.

• 1:06:24Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:06:25Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, um, well, uh, I don't know what to say, uh.

• 1:06:30Speaker 03

  Not well.

• 1:06:30Speaker 01

  No, I mean, there's hot cartoon characters.

• 1:06:33Conan O'Brien?

  Again, you keep saying that.

• 1:06:34Speaker 01

  I think we can all agree Jessica Rabbit is a hot broad.

• 1:06:38Conan O'Brien?

  That's true.

• 1:06:39Speaker 01

  We all wanna bang, right? And then, like, even me, and I think that there's hot cartoon characters.

• 1:06:44Speaker 04

  You are a hot cartoon.

• 1:06:44Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah, no, I wanna bang her. But I'm saying, there's hot cartoon characters. You are a pod training toy.

• 1:06:50Conan O'Brien?

  Who's another hot cartoon character? David, you're probably thinking of someone.

• 1:06:53Speaker 04

  Uh, any of the, like...

• 1:06:57Speaker 01

  Well, I'm...

• 1:06:57Speaker 04

  I think I just had a stroke.

• 1:06:58Speaker 01

  Now, we're gonna take a look into your psyche.

• 1:07:00Conan O'Brien?

  Who, like, Skeletor?

• 1:07:05Speaker 01

  Like, He-Man can get it.

• 1:07:06Conan O'Brien?

  He-Man?

• 1:07:07Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:07:07Conan O'Brien?

  He can get it?

• 1:07:08Speaker 01

  Sure.

• 1:07:09Speaker 03

  Scarlett from G.I. Joe.

• 1:07:10Conan O'Brien?

  Are you saying?

• 1:07:10Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 1:07:11Conan O'Brien?

  Are you saying He-Man fucks?

• 1:07:12Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:07:13Speaker 01

  I think He-Man fucks.

• 1:07:14Conan O'Brien?

  Guess what? Skeletor fucks.

• 1:07:16Speaker 01

  Skeletor doesn't fuck.

• 1:07:18Conan O'Brien?

  Skeletor.

• 1:07:19Speaker 03

  Jared Leto playing Skeletor? He fucks, unfortunately. Unfortunately.

• 1:07:23Conan O'Brien?

  Skeletor is DTF.

• 1:07:24Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:07:25Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, he bones. He bones. There you go.

• 1:07:28Speaker 04

  Nice.

• 1:07:28Conan O'Brien?

  Nicely done. Nicely done, Blake.

• 1:07:30Speaker 01

  No, I remember my friend had a thing for Gambit from X-Men. That, like, he's hot.

• 1:07:35Conan O'Brien?

  That's a cartoon character?

• 1:07:36Speaker 01

  Yes, from X-Men, Gambit. But I just, I, this, this, this is one of those things where you're like, people don't need to post everything on the internet. That's the, that's the problem.

• 1:07:47Speaker 03

  He's a machine. He's for kids. He, is he kind of a childlike?

• 1:07:51Conan O'Brien?

  Well, I think, uh, he has many of my qualities. So, yeah, probably a little bit childlike.

• 1:07:57Speaker 01

  I don't know, like, I would do Woody before I did Smarty Pants, I think. Or Buzz, Buzz Lightyear for sure can get it.

• 1:08:04Conan O'Brien?

  All I know is that a van...

• 1:08:06Speaker 03

  Well, you know, you can get him if you just go to the store.

• 1:08:10Conan O'Brien?

  I only know...

• 1:08:11Speaker 01

  For raking the Toy Story.

• 1:08:13Conan O'Brien?

  All I know is that a minivan packed with Disney lawyers is driving from Anaheim to this podcast studio right now at 110 miles an hour.

• 1:08:27Speaker 03

  Absolutely.

• 1:08:28Conan O'Brien?

  And you know what? Anyone who goes to see Toy Story 5 the day after this comes out

• 1:08:33Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:08:34Conan O'Brien?

  is going to see just, just pixels where I used to be.

• 1:08:37Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 1:08:38Conan O'Brien?

  And a burn mark on the screen.

• 1:08:39Speaker 01

  I think that's for the best.

• 1:08:41Speaker 04

  We lost any chance of you being in the sixth one?

• 1:08:43Speaker 03

  Actually, anybody that goes to see the movie is gonna be put on a sex offender list from here on out and has to go door to door in their neighborhood.

• 1:08:50Conan O'Brien?

  No, they're gonna stop the film the minute my character's about to come up and go, "All right, you perverts." We got you. Clear out, clear out.

• 1:08:58Speaker 01

  Raid, vice raid.

• 1:08:59Conan O'Brien?

  Clear out, you in the raincoat, get out.

• 1:09:03Speaker 01

  Oh, man.

• 1:09:04Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, my god.

• 1:09:05Speaker 01

  No, even, even Wally before Smartypants. I, I have a list.

• 1:09:10Conan O'Brien?

  Can I say what? Now you're just being mean.

• 1:09:12Speaker 01

  No, I'm not. Wally? Wally is like sentient, and he got Eve.

• 1:09:16Conan O'Brien?

  And sensual, apparently.

• 1:09:17Speaker 01

  Yes, no, he got, he landed Eve. There's like a thing to him. There's a, there's a sensitivity.

• 1:09:22Conan O'Brien?

  You know what?

• 1:09:22Speaker 01

  There's nothing about your character.

• 1:09:24Conan O'Brien?

  That's just, what are you talking about? I'm, I'm adorable.

• 1:09:29Speaker 01

  I mean, you're talking about pee pee and poopoo most of the time. A lot of your humor is like pee pee poopoo humor.

• 1:09:34Conan O'Brien?

  I base him on you.

• 1:09:38Conan O'Brien?

  I saw what the character was, and I said, oh, you want the Sona. That's why this is happening. Those people up there putting this upper into some weird shit.

• 1:09:47Conan O'Brien?

  Well, listen, I think the only way to decide this matter is for everyone to go see Toy Story 5 in theaters now.

• 1:09:57Conan O'Brien?

  And guess what? The van just turned around. The van just turned around.

• 1:10:03Conan O'Brien?

  It just did a hard 180, and it's headed back to the Magic Castle.

• 1:10:06Speaker 01

  Oh, my god.

• 1:10:07Conan O'Brien?

  All right, peace out.

• 1:10:12Speaker 05

  Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend with Conan O'Brien, Sonam of Sessian, and Matt Gourley. Produced by me, Matt Gourley. Executive produced by Adam Sachs, Jeff Ross, and Nick Liao. Theme song by The White Stripes. Incidental music by Jimmy Vivino. Take it away, Jimmy.

• 1:10:32Speaker 05

  Our supervising producer is Aaron Blair, and our associate talent producer is Jennifer Samples. Engineering and mixing by Eduardo Perez and Brendan Burns. Additional production support by Mars Melnick. Talent booking by Paula Davis, Gina Batista, and Britt Kahn. You can rate and review this show on Apple Podcasts, and you might find your review read on a future episode. Got a question for Conan? Call the Team Coco hotline at 669-587-2847 and leave a message. It too could be featured on a future episode. You can also get three free months of SiriusXM when you sign up at siriusxm.com/conan. And if you haven't already, please subscribe to Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend wherever fine podcasts are downloaded.

• 1:11:22Conan O'Brien?

  Technology can generate salary recommendations in seconds, but building an offer that lands skilled talent, that takes more than just an estimate you came up with.

• 1:11:30Speaker 01

  Yeah, you're right.

• 1:11:31Conan O'Brien?

  That's where Robert Half's new 2027 Salary Guide can help.

• 1:11:35Speaker 01

  That's good.

• 1:11:36Conan O'Brien?

  Did we use a salary guide with you, Sona?

• 1:11:38Speaker 01

  Uh, no, but maybe-

• 1:11:39Conan O'Brien?

  For several years, I just gave you groceries, remember?

• 1:11:41Speaker 01

  I know, I remember that. That was not good.

• 1:11:44Conan O'Brien?

  Uh, well, anyway, now you got Robert Half's new 2027 Salary Guide. As a staffing firm placing talent every day, Robert Half combines compensation data with the experience of local recruiters you can hire with the confidence that comes from experience. The new Robert Half Salary Guide is here. Visit roberthalf.com/salaryguide.

• 1:12:05Conan O'Brien?

  When you hear Alka-Seltzer, you probably think heartburn, right?

• 1:12:08Speaker 04

  Yep.

• 1:12:08Conan O'Brien?

  Well, did you know Alka-Seltzer has a line of cold and flu medications known as Alka-Seltzer Cold?

• 1:12:14Speaker 04

  Ooh.

• 1:12:15Conan O'Brien?

  Did you know that, David?

• 1:12:16Speaker 04

  No, but I feel like we need it.

• 1:12:17Conan O'Brien?

  Why didn't you know that, David?

• 1:12:18Speaker 04

  I know, you expect me to know everything.

• 1:12:20Conan O'Brien?

  I knew this because I-

• 1:12:21Speaker 04

  Did you?

• 1:12:21Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, I've tried it. It's really good. And I like that fizzy, fizzy, fizzy when you drop the Alka-Seltzer Cold into the water. Alka-Seltzer Cold: Fast Dissolves Tablets Are Designed to Deliver Cold and Flu Relief Fast. Just drop the two tablets in water and hear those bubbles bursting into action, ready to work faster than pills. Bubbles faster than pills. Pills take time to dissolve, not bubbles. Next time a cold or flu strikes, quick! Alka-Seltzer Cold: Nothing Works Faster for Cold and Flu Symptom Relief. Among Oral Products Used as Directed.