Fraud Friday: The Queen of Cons w/ Miranda Cosgrove & Nathan Kress

It’s the iCarly, Scam Goddess crossover we’ve all been waiting for! We got Miranda Cosgrove and Nathan Kress discussing Cassie Chadwick, who at the turn of the 20th century became one of the US’ foremost accomplished fraudsters. Plus, a Florida man is charged with 114 counts of various fraud, after he was caught in an alleged decades-long scheme to defraud Florida State’s Division of Unclaimed Property. Stay Schemin’! (Originally Released 6/14/2022) CON-gregation, make sure to catch Laci's new TV Show Scam Goddess, now on Freeform and Hulu! Follow on Instagram: Scam Goddess Pod: @scamgoddesspod Laci Mosley: @divalaci Miranda Cosgrove: @mirandacosgrove Nathan Kress: @nathankress Research by Kaelyn Brandt. Sources: https://www.smithsonianmag.com/history/the-high-priestess-of-fraudulent-finance-45/ https://www.thevintagenews.com/2016/11/22/the-turbulent-life-of-cassie-chadwick-the-impostor-who-claimed-to-be-carnegies-illegitimate-daughter/ https://www.wctv.tv/2021/07/13/man-faces-114-charges-alleged-2-million-unclaimed-property-fraud-scheme/

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Speaker 00

  Even on my antidepressant, I still struggled with depression symptoms.

• 0:03Speaker 01

  You okay, honey?

• 0:05Speaker 00

  I'm okay, ish. My doctor said adding Rexulti Brex-Piprazole could help.

• 0:10Speaker 02

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• 0:50Speaker 01

  Hey, how you doing, honey?

• 0:51Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 0:52Speaker 01

  Okay-ish?

• 0:53Speaker 00

  No-ish. I'm okay, really.

• 0:56Speaker 02

  Ask your doctor about adding...

• 1:01Speaker 03

  This is Gemma Spieg from the Psychology of Your 20s. You know that feeling when your skin just needs a tall drink of water? That's what Clinique Moisture Surge 100-Hour Moisturizer is for. Moisture Surge 100-Hour Moisturizer absorbs instantly and hydrates for 100 hours for plump, glowing skin. That's right, 100 hours. It is a lightweight, oil-free gel cream, safe for sensitive skin, it's allergy-tested and fragrance-free. I use this all the time, it makes my skin feel so fresh and plump and glowy. Even under makeup, I still see an amazing difference. It never leaves my skin oily or tacky.

• 1:45Speaker 03

  Try Clinique Moisture Surge 100-Hour today at clinique.com. Feels like moisture surge.

• 1:53Laci Mosley?

  What's poppin', congregation? It's your girl, Lacey Mosley, AKA Scam Goddess. Welcome to an episode of Fraud Fridays, where we release older episodes from the Scam Goddess Vault. That's right, Fraud Fridays is where we bring back your favorite episodes from behind the paywall. Enjoy this episode from behind the paywall, and as always, stay schemin'.

• 2:35Laci Mosley?

  What's poppin', congregation? It's your girl, Lacey Mosley, AKA Scam Goddess, and we're back with another installment of Scam Goddess, the podcast all about robbery, fraud, cons, those who practice it. Sometimes we love 'em, sometimes we hate 'em. We will see. Y'all like this raspy voice? I'm trying to get y'all something different. Is this good, girl? Is that, y'all like that? Respond. Yeah? Okay, you know, we got a parasocial relationship. Uh, guys, I'm very what? Yes, very excited. I'm extremely excited, guys. The scams continue. Finally scams the people that I've wanted on this podcast for a long time, and their friends, and their castmates, and I'mma stop talking like this now. I'm sorry, that's all you get. When I was sick, y'all were saying that my voice was sexy, which was really fucked up of y'all,

• 3:18Laci Mosley?

  but I was trying to replicate it. Guys, today we have two amazing guests on the show. Our first guest is an actor, director, and former child model who currently plays-

• 3:31Speaker 05

  How did that get in there?

• 3:32Speaker 06

  Whoa, wait, hold on.

• 3:33Speaker 05

  Did you send that to her?

• 3:35Speaker 06

  I did not.

• 3:35Speaker 05

  Did you want that in there?

• 3:37Speaker 06

  This was not-

• 3:38Laci Mosley?

  When I read it, I was like, "Okay, well, that's what you want, Nathan."

• 3:42Speaker 06

  I did one print ad for a yeast infection medication, okay? That doesn't make me a model.

• 3:49Speaker 05

  A male model.

• 3:50Laci Mosley?

  Former child model.

• 3:53Speaker 06

  Finger painted in a stranger's lap for a yeast infection medication. That does not qualify me. I redact what you just described.

• 4:02Laci Mosley?

  I don't know, it's giving Naomi Campbell. It's giving Miranda Kerr, I don't know. Former child model.

• 4:12Laci Mosley?

  And he currently plays Freddie Benson on iCarly. Nathan Kress.

• 4:19Laci Mosley?

  And our other amazing guest, my homie, an actress, a singer, a producer, and plays Carly Shay on iCarly, Miranda Cosgrove.

• 4:28Speaker 05

  A former child model. I did some Kmart ads.

• 4:32Speaker 06

  I was about to say.

• 4:33Laci Mosley?

  Two former child models.

• 4:36Speaker 06

  That's right. That's right. We're both in the same boat.

• 4:39Speaker 05

  It's kind of sad, though, because we're not models now.

• 4:41Speaker 06

  Not even remotely.

• 4:43Laci Mosley?

  I think that's what's disrespectful is the child.

• 4:47Speaker 05

  The worst child.

• 4:48Speaker 06

  You were cute and very photographable when you were a child, but as soon as you grew up, oh.

• 4:53Speaker 05

  We both lost it.

• 4:55Speaker 06

  We had the spark and it fizzled.

• 4:57Laci Mosley?

  Two former child models.

• 5:00Speaker 06

  Down on their luck, former child models had to settle for a TV show.

• 5:07Laci Mosley?

  Can you guys please welcome Nathan Kress and Miranda Cosgrove to the show? You already know they're here, the two former child models. The hottest babies you've ever seen.

• 5:16Speaker 06

  My bowl cut was on such point around that phase, I'm just gonna say.

• 5:22Laci Mosley?

  I believe it. I believe it. I've seen a lot of photos of you as a child. Both of you are in so many memes that are used to this day all the time. And it's very funny to me.

• 5:33Laci Mosley?

  The one, I'm sorry, Nathan. I'm sure you probably hate this meme.

• 5:37Speaker 06

  I do. I guarantee you. I already know I do.

• 5:40Laci Mosley?

  The one where Nathan's holding the camera as a child in the original iCarly, you know, shooting, but they like edited with Photoshop into Kim K, R.J.'s sex date. And so it looks like he's filming them.

• 5:56Speaker 05

  Like he was the one.

• 5:57Speaker 06

  Yeah, there's that. There's also me doing Bin Laden, like filming a Bin Laden propaganda video. And then there's one where I'm on my laptop, just studiously working, sitting at a table next to Bin Laden.

• 6:10Speaker 05

  Why do they keep sticking you with Bin Laden?

• 6:12Speaker 06

  I don't know who had it in their mind to assimilate Freddie Benson and Bin Laden, but I don't think Mrs. Benson would have allowed such a thing.

• 6:22Laci Mosley?

  No.

• 6:23Speaker 05

  I have one where I'm with Biggie Smalls, I think, and I'm smoking pot, and I'm like, nine.

• 6:28Laci Mosley?

  They love to put nine, oh my gosh. Former child, weed model, Biggie Smalls.

• 6:36Speaker 06

  I also love the one that's Die Carli, the video game where it's you gleefully holding a gun.

• 6:42Speaker 05

  A gun?

• 6:43Speaker 06

  Out to people, like an action-adventure game.

• 6:46Laci Mosley?

  And I like the one that's like, it's the gun's very close to the camera and she's smiling. Oh my goodness, y'all are wild. Y'all need to stop. These are human beings. Stop putting Freddie with Bin Laden. You don't know him.

• 7:00Laci Mosley?

  Guys, so this is a podcast all about scams and fraud, and either of you can go first. Like, what's your relationship with scams? It can be a scam story. You can just tell me if you hate scams or you love them. It can be anything. Very no-pressure show.

• 7:12Speaker 06

  For me personally, I have a very conflicting relationship with scams because I'm so fascinated by them. I love them in a deep, dark, masochistic way because the mindset of a scammer is so interesting to me. The creativity that it takes and the confidence that they have to have to pull this stuff off. I don't have that brain, so when I hear about people who do these things, it's very interesting to me, and I kind of love it. But at the same time, it also triggers a massive justice complex in me where I get really mad about it because I don't like people getting, you know.

• 7:46Speaker 05

  You like justice?

• 7:47Speaker 06

  I like justice.

• 7:48Laci Mosley?

  I love it. I love when someone comes on and likes justice because...

• 7:52Speaker 06

  Because this is not the place for that.

• 7:53Laci Mosley?

  No, it absolutely is. We love a viewpoint that's like, we like some justice, and maybe we'll see some, maybe we won't.

• 8:00Speaker 06

  Maybe.

• 8:00Laci Mosley?

  But I'm the type that I'm like, okay, well, if you're scamming corporations, they're scamming us.

• 8:06Speaker 06

  That's okay.

• 8:07Laci Mosley?

  Yeah, if you're harming people, though, I'm absolutely on your side of like, if they're poor people, marginalized people, people who are really like, you know, you're ruining their lives, that upsets me because I'm like, come on, don't scam down, scam up.

• 8:19Speaker 06

  Yeah. But I love a corporate espionage kind of scam. Those, you know.

• 8:24Laci Mosley?

  You like Ocean's Eleven, like...

• 8:26Speaker 06

  Yeah, I'll watch that documentary. I'll support that narrative.

• 8:30Laci Mosley?

  Nathan is a real follower. Nathan literally comes to set early and he orders his breakfast the night before.

• 8:39Speaker 05

  So he doesn't cause any trouble?

• 8:40Speaker 06

  I don't want to bog down crafty in the morning.

• 8:44Laci Mosley?

  I'll be pulling up to set, like, I know how to be the perfect amount of late. Where it's like, it's not gonna throw anything off, no one's gonna notice on set, I'm not gonna disrespect our crew and things like that. But if you call me in and I look at the call sheet and I'm like, wait a minute, I got a little more time than what they giving me. I'm gonna take it. I moved three minutes away from Paramount so that if I overslept, which happened once.

• 9:05Speaker 05

  You'd still be there in three minutes?

• 9:07Laci Mosley?

  Yeah. One time I overslept, got a phone call from our A.D. And he was like, oh, where are you? And I was like, oh, I'm in bed. And he was like, oh, you need to be at work. And I was like, oh, okay. I took a shower, like, got ready, did everything. I was in work, at work in 12 minutes.

• 9:24Speaker 06

  Wow.

• 9:25Speaker 05

  That's amazing.

• 9:26Speaker 06

  Good for you. I mean, wow. Yes, see, my problem is I'm too far away for that. I have to leave early.

• 9:32Laci Mosley?

  Yeah, you got a plan.

• 9:33Speaker 06

  Because California's always on fire. You never know when the, just some, I'm just gonna stop.

• 9:38Laci Mosley?

  You be driving from San Francisco every day, so you got a plan.

• 9:41Speaker 06

  I need that high-speed bullet train real bad to span the length of California.

• 9:45Laci Mosley?

  Where's all our infrastructure? America the ghetto.

• 9:48Speaker 05

  The scams that I'm the most into, but also dislike the most are like love scams. Like when people do stuff on apps, like Tinder Swindler, that really got me. Like, I couldn't stop watching it, but I was furious. I just hate the thought of somebody going on an app and like pretending they're something they totally aren't.

• 10:09Laci Mosley?

  Apps are your safe space?

• 10:13Laci Mosley?

  How dare you do this to me on Bumble? I sent you a prompt!

• 10:18Speaker 05

  I do not like that. I've also been, I was telling Nathan, I've been swindled before by a grandmother.

• 10:24Laci Mosley?

  Oh, yes.

• 10:25Speaker 05

  This grandma, I think I've told you before, she, um, she was a very young grandmother and she had a motorcycle. And I was friends with her daughter. And when I went to pick her daughter up one day, she rolled the motorcycle out to the front yard. And while I was waiting for her daughter to come out, I was like, oh, like, what's going on? Because she was like shining it up. And she was like, I'm just really sad. And I was like, why? Like, what's happening? And she was like, well, like, this motorcycle is my pride and joy. And she was like, but um, I have to sell it. And she was like, I went on Craigslist and the person's gonna be here any minute. Take her away. And I was like.

• 10:59Laci Mosley?

  I love that she did a whole performance. She was like, oh, Miranda's coming. Okay, wheel the bike out. Yeah, give me that rag.

• 11:06Speaker 05

  Start polishing. She was so sad. And I was just like, oh, my God, that's horrible. Like, she was like, yeah, but she's like, I needed $3,000. She was like, you gotta do what you gotta do. And I was just kinda like, okay. And then I could tell like she was, she was hoping I would offer.

• 11:21Laci Mosley?

  Yeah, I mean, that's why she was specific. She was like, yeah, it's crazy. She was wiping the motorcycle with no rag. She was just moving her hand in circles in front of it. She's like, yeah, it's crazy. I gotta shine it up because I don't have $3,068.

• 11:34Speaker 05

  But I didn't do anything. And then later, I just felt really weird. Like, I could feel something was off. And then like a week later, um, she was like, literally going around on the motorcycle. And I was in my car and I saw her.

• 11:46Laci Mosley?

  Damn, she was like, if only I knew a former child model.

• 11:51Speaker 05

  That I could get $3,068 from.

• 11:57Speaker 05

  That is a good scam, though, to just like wheel your motorcycle out. Like, what if every time someone came over to your house, like, no matter who it was, you just wheeled your motorcycle out and you got off the shining spray and you started?

• 12:07Laci Mosley?

  I wouldn't be surprised if she had done that to more than one person. Like, I don't think, Granny, I don't think you should be cleaning that with Windex. Is that Pablo So? Why you cleaning shit?

• 12:17Speaker 06

  She probably just does it on a sliding scale, too, when she knows who's coming over. If it's a former child model, yeah, you're getting into the four-figure sums. But if it's just one of the friends coming over, they only need like $300, you know?

• 12:29Laci Mosley?

  Is she like shining a Lime scooter then? Because she takes down the stakes.

• 12:33Speaker 06

  My pride and joy, my baby.

• 12:35Laci Mosley?

  How will I get around town as a grandmother without my scooter? Oh, man, I love that. I feel like you guys have been famous for a very long time. So I think that you're very ripe for scams. I think people might see you and think, you know, dollar signs in their eyes, you know, scams.

• 12:54Speaker 06

  Yeah, I think that's why you generally have to have a mindset of just everyone is sus. So you kinda have to.

• 12:59Speaker 05

  When you're still making bank from a yeast infection commercial.

• 13:03Speaker 06

  I'm still getting those residuals from that one.

• 13:07Speaker 06

  And you gotta protect that.

• 13:08Speaker 05

  You can't trust anyone.

• 13:09Speaker 06

  That's, that's my nest egg right there. I can't let, I can't let that be compromised.

• 13:14Laci Mosley?

  That's when Nathan really blew up. We were like, we know you, Monistad. Yeah, yeah, that's me. That's me.

• 13:21Speaker 06

  That was my vocal. I still have the overalls.

• 13:25Laci Mosley?

  Oh, I love this for you both. Well, let's get into our first segment here. What's hot and fraud? This is where we warn our listeners about pop and scams and the zeitgeist. And more often than not, we get a letter from you guys out there as always. Snitch on your friends and family at [email protected]. Just make sure your scam is retired because we don't want to what? Yes, fuck up your bag. Amen.

• 13:45Laci Mosley?

  Miranda, Nathan, I need a fake name for this person. We don't care about gender. Could be anything.

• 13:51Speaker 05

  Mary Ellen.

• 13:53Speaker 06

  How classy.

• 13:55Laci Mosley?

  I love that because it's so old and timey that it's gonna fit perfectly into this episode. Mary Ellen. Oh, Mary Ellen. I feel like our baby's named Mary. When you have a baby named Mary, can you call him Mary? Like, I, like, when they're a baby?

• 14:10Speaker 05

  It's an adult name.

• 14:12Speaker 06

  Well, all baby names become adult names.

• 14:14Speaker 05

  I know, but certain names, they're not baby names.

• 14:17Speaker 06

  Like, they're just meant to be for an adult. Yeah, I get, yeah.

• 14:20Laci Mosley?

  Like, if your name is Kiki, when you become an adult, you're gonna have to try to find something more adult than that.

• 14:24Speaker 05

  Catherine.

• 14:27Laci Mosley?

  They're like, no, your name is Kiki on the birth certificate. No, no, no, I'm 25 now. It's Catherine. We just, we're changing the name. We can't be Kiki anymore.

• 14:36Laci Mosley?

  It's like a lot of family members of mine have Lil in front of their names still. Like, we call them like Lil Daryl. And they're grown adults and we're like, yeah, it's Lil Daryl.

• 14:45Speaker 05

  What name would have you picked, Nathan? Maybe yours would be better.

• 14:47Speaker 06

  Well, see, I was gonna go, I was gonna go Brunnhilde.

• 14:50Speaker 05

  Brunnhilde?

• 14:50Speaker 06

  So, which is like far, far.

• 14:52Laci Mosley?

  That gets me like Django Unchained, but it's like a German name or something.

• 14:55Speaker 06

  Brunnhilde.

• 14:57Speaker 05

  You can decide, Blacy, which, which name is the winner?

• 15:02Speaker 06

  Both of them are.

• 15:02Laci Mosley?

  Mary Ellen or Brunnhilde.

• 15:06Speaker 05

  They're both pretty good.

• 15:07Laci Mosley?

  Maybe I give them four names. So, Mary Ellen Brunnhilde says.

• 15:12Laci Mosley?

  Oh, there's a lot of nice, you know, I'm gonna read this, uh, just cuz of your profession. Says, uh, "I think you're 10 out of 10 and the most delightful. The scam I have to share is one that I caught one of my first graders doing." I'm a teacher. Shout out to the teachers. Really, shout out to y'all, man, like. Whoo, I don't know how y'all do it. I'm not dealing with nobody's unemployed spawn all day. And they mouthy, they got attitude and lip, and it's like, "You don't pay no bills." "How dare you."

• 15:40Speaker 06

  I literally had to tell my four-year-old that the other day. He's like,

• 15:44Laci Mosley?

  Start him young.

• 15:44Speaker 06

  Yep, you can slam the door when it's your house.

• 15:47Laci Mosley?

  You ain't paying no door bills in here.

• 15:49Speaker 06

  That's right.

• 15:50Laci Mosley?

  You ain't got no WD-40 money.

• 15:51Speaker 06

  You're not gonna send the repairman out for that crack in that door that you made?

• 15:55Laci Mosley?

  Exactly.

• 15:56Speaker 06

  Those four-year-olds need to know.

• 15:58Laci Mosley?

  They do. I love that that's your version of like what black people call McDonald's money. Like when we were kids, like we'd always wanna go to McDonald's, and I'm gonna lie, this is a universal black experience. We'd be like, "Let's go to McDonald's," and then our parents would be like, "You got McDonald's money?" Of course I don't. I'm unemployed. But I love it being like, "You got, you got door slamming money?"

• 16:21Laci Mosley?

  I don't think you do, so.

• 16:22Speaker 06

  That's a solid core door, child.

• 16:24Laci Mosley?

  Right, these doors are expensive. What you doing? I love that so much. So, uh, Mary Ellen Brumhilde says, "In my class, my students earn tickets in various ways." So you gotta fucking compensate these children, like, "Well, I gotta pay you."

• 16:40Laci Mosley?

  For a free education.

• 16:41Speaker 05

  Like for bad behavior or like for good?

• 16:43Laci Mosley?

  For good. Wait, what? That's a ticket.

• 16:49Speaker 05

  When I was little, I had to pull my card. Did you ever do that?

• 16:52Speaker 06

  Yes.

• 16:53Speaker 05

  And it's like getting a ticket. Kind of. I mean, you have to pull the card and then eventually it gets to red, and then you're done.

• 16:59Speaker 06

  Oh, you're cooked. That goose is cooked.

• 17:02Laci Mosley?

  It's over. I, you know what, that, I don't think was exception. They didn't factor in like children who were like meant to be entertainers or people who were not like the most like self, like, okay, we had something at our elementary school called self-managers. And self-managers got these gold badges that they could wear around and they would have like little pizza parties like every quarter. And I always wanted to be a self-manager, but you had to have good grades and you couldn't get your card pulled a lot. So I would have good grades, but I'd be getting my card pulled all the time cuz I'd be talking cash shit in class.

• 17:37Laci Mosley?

  And for some reason, at this school, and we all wore uniforms, there were a lot of Russian kids, and all the Russian kids were self-managers.

• 17:50Speaker 06

  Odd.

• 17:51Laci Mosley?

  A government coup?

• 17:56Laci Mosley?

  I don't know, but they were all self-managers, and I was always so envious of this. I'm like, man, Aya got, she is a self-manager.

• 18:02Speaker 05

  How did you become one? How did you, like, what did you have to do to get it?

• 18:05Laci Mosley?

  Be quiet and get good grades. And I could get good grades, but I couldn't be quiet.

• 18:10Speaker 05

  It's like a self-manager would need to have confidence and be loud.

• 18:14Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 18:14Laci Mosley?

  Right. I'm managing myself. What are you talking about? So.

• 18:18Speaker 06

  Showing leadership qualities, managing others.

• 18:21Laci Mosley?

  Exactly. Mary Ellen Brumhilde is giving out these tickets, positive reinforcement, Miranda.

• 18:26Speaker 05

  Not negative.

• 18:29Laci Mosley?

  They write their names on them, and at the end of the day, we do a drawing with those tickets. We always choose two names, and those two students get to choose a prize from my prize box. I mean, I miss being a kid, because we used to be delighted by the most basic-ass shit, like a fucking eraser that smelled good.

• 18:45Laci Mosley?

  I'm like, ooh, a pencil.

• 18:49Speaker 06

  But it's got cinnamon on it.

• 18:50Laci Mosley?

  When are we gonna get our mesothelioma commercial, which I think is gonna be like, if you were a loved one and smelled a magic sniff marker, you may be entitled to damages. I know something that was doing something to us.

• 19:01Speaker 06

  For sure.

• 19:01Laci Mosley?

  And I was sniffing them all. I loved the grape one.

• 19:04Speaker 06

  Oh, the best.

• 19:05Laci Mosley?

  Why do you need to sniff a pen or a marker? Like, that's insane.

• 19:08Speaker 06

  And I don't get, they, you can't sniff any of the other markers. So why are there only certain markers you can sniff?

• 19:15Laci Mosley?

  Honestly, a gateway drug, because then, you know, I started sniffing, um, permanent markers. You get a little hout.

• 19:22Speaker 06

  Yeah, then you get the white out, you know? It's a slippery slope.

• 19:26Laci Mosley?

  Just a paint huffing. That's the gateway to paint huffing, is you got magic markers for children. So they get something from the prize box. Last week, I noticed one student had been winning an uncanny amount of times. Like, homie was getting a prize eight out of nine days in a row. And I should have caught it earlier, but I've been having health issues, and it's the end of the year, and you know how it goes. I know absolutely how it goes. And also, you a teacher, you gotta be out here being a, you gotta be a teacher, you gotta be, like, martial law, you gotta, it's just, it's an insane position that this country has put our educators in, and they don't pay them well enough. I'm like, I'm glad y'all not in here shaking the kids and pinching them under their arms. I be pitching all the kids.

• 20:09Laci Mosley?

  Little tiny little. Do it right where no one can see it.

• 20:15Laci Mosley?

  Um, but like, so shout out to you, but so anyway, she's like, I didn't notice that this was happening. Anyways, I investigated a little bit and noticed that on the tickets that had this student's name, you could faintly see an erased name underneath it. I asked the student about it and they were like, every day when you put my ticket in the jar, I would take a few tickets out and erase whoever's name was on it and then write my own.

• 20:39Speaker 05

  He just gave himself up. It's like he was so proud. Like, you know in movies when the villain just starts talking for a long time about what they did? And you're wondering like, why is this villain talking for 15 minutes?

• 20:49Laci Mosley?

  These are details we didn't ask for. These are crimes we didn't, you're like, yeah, 10 years ago, I robbed another bank. It's like, nobody asked about that. You don't have to, just proud. He was like, yeah, I took, I took a few out. But think about it, if he only took a few out and left some, his odds are still pretty good. This teacher must not have been shaking up the ticket bowl. He was just sprinkling them on top.

• 21:07Speaker 05

  Was the teacher impressed? What did the teacher do?

• 21:10Laci Mosley?

  He says, honestly, for a first grader, this is the equivalent of Ocean's Eleven heist because they're just very bad liars and never sneaky. So props to this kid, but I did have to remove all the tickets that had their name on it in the jar so they couldn't keep winning prizes.

• 21:27Laci Mosley?

  So basically what he was doing was stacking the deck, cause like, they get these tickets for being good and then the tickets accumulate.

• 21:33Speaker 05

  So he was doing something evil, but he was getting the tickets for being good, cause she thought he was being good. And then he was also writing his name on all of them.

• 21:40Laci Mosley?

  Little by little, every day he was stacking the deck, cause he's adding more tickets every single time, cause he's erasing people's names. So think of like a big jar and then every time you get good tickets.

• 21:49Speaker 06

  Right.

• 21:49Laci Mosley?

  She reaches into the same jar and you have better chances of winning if you're better behaved.

• 21:54Speaker 06

  I'm just trying to figure out, when, when is he getting them back into the jar? Cause he's gotta take them out, he's gotta take them away, he's gotta go erase and put his name back on it.

• 22:01Laci Mosley?

  These kids are quick.

• 22:03Speaker 06

  Where's he finding that time?

• 22:03Laci Mosley?

  There was a viral tweet about a teacher that, she was like, I took her phone away from a child in my class and then I turned around and she had the phone again and she was on it. And she was like, how did you get this phone? And she was like, oh, you and my mama love a little drawer. And then we like went back to her phone.

• 22:22Laci Mosley?

  Y'all love a little drawer, Chad. I just went into the drawer and got it back.

• 22:27Speaker 05

  Just open the drawer up.

• 22:29Laci Mosley?

  I love that, though. I love when kids are criminals. I love it, because you can tell early on if a kid's gonna be a criminal. A few ways you can tell, if they open up a lemonade stand. And get a kid who's trying to make money.

• 22:41Speaker 05

  I had a lemonade stand.

• 22:44Speaker 05

  Multiple times as a child.

• 22:46Speaker 06

  You're just a scam waiting to happen. Taking time, by the way.

• 22:49Speaker 05

  I love a good lemonade stand.

• 22:52Speaker 05

  That child model money isn't what people think it is.

• 22:56Laci Mosley?

  Now you're having to open your small business after your child modeling career fizzles out. So we gotta pivot. Now I'm a child model who sells lemonade.

• 23:05Speaker 05

  Lemonade on the street corner.

• 23:06Laci Mosley?

  Now, what kind of lemonade were you slanging?

• 23:08Speaker 05

  My mom helped me make it. It was homemade lemonade. Which nowadays I feel like nobody would buy. Because they'd be scared to get COVID.

• 23:15Laci Mosley?

  Right, or anything, because it's like...

• 23:17Speaker 05

  Any germs.

• 23:17Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 23:18Laci Mosley?

  Man, the good old days when you could leave your doors unlocked and buy unmarked lemonade on the street.

• 23:23Speaker 05

  I remember how excited I was because my across-street neighbor, they were doing construction, and I knew all the construction workers were gonna be there one day.

• 23:30Speaker 06

  Oh!

• 23:32Laci Mosley?

  You are a scammer, already. You're like, "Ooh, and today is hot, 89 degrees? Oh, yeah, y'all gonna be parched."

• 23:39Speaker 06

  Put up a little Easy Up right over there so they could stand in line in the shade and get their ice cold lemonade.

• 23:45Speaker 05

  Put out the catalog that I had the picture in from the child modeling to draw them in. Actually, that's creepy, wouldn't you say? Never mind.

• 23:52Speaker 06

  Not totally sure about that part.

• 23:53Speaker 05

  That doesn't work. I was...

• 23:56Laci Mosley?

  I love that you're just trying to add, you're like, "Just whatever we can do to advertise this lemonade." I love it, I love it. I think you could put out a sign that's like, "Struggling former child model."

• 24:07Speaker 05

  That would've been good.

• 24:08Laci Mosley?

  "Please buy lemon sugar water. Help a struggling child model." Well, guys, we're gonna take a quick break for some non-scam advertisements. We'll be right back with my favorite part of the show, historic hoodwink. Scams!

• 24:25Laci Mosley?

  She'd throw things, wander, and started hoarding. Mom's Alzheimer's was already so hard. But then we found out she had agitation that may happen with dementia due to Alzheimer's disease. And that was a different kind of difficult. So we asked her doctor for more help. Seeing symptoms like these in a loved one, it could be time to ask their doctor about it.

• 24:44Speaker 05

  Rexulti, Rexiprazole 2mg. The first FDA-approved treatment for this condition. Rexulti is proven to reduce agitation symptoms. Rexulti should not be used as an as-needed treatment. Elderly people with dementia-related psychosis have increased risk of death or stroke. Report fever, stiff muscles, and confusion, which can be life-threatening, or uncontrolled muscle movements, which may be permanent. High blood sugar can lead to coma or death. Weight gain, increased cholesterol, unusual urges, dizziness on standing, falls, seizures, trouble swallowing, or sleepiness may occur. Learn more about these and other side effects at rexulti.com. Tap ad for PI.

• 25:15Speaker 00

  I'm glad I asked for help.

• 25:18Speaker 05

  Ask your loved one's doctor about Rexulti.

• 25:22Speaker 00

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• 25:35Laci Mosley?

  With flexible draws, transparent pricing, and control over repayment, get funded quickly and confidently. Apply today at ondeck.com. Funds could be available as soon as tomorrow. Depending on certain loan attributes, your business loan may be issued by OnDeck or Celtic Bank. OnDeck does not lend in North Dakota. All loans and amounts subject to lender approval.

• 25:55Laci Mosley?

  And we are back, and it's time for Historic Hoodwings. This is when I will regale our two former child models, Nathan and Miranda, with a hoodwink.

• 26:08Laci Mosley?

  I don't know, I think it's gonna stick now.

• 26:09Speaker 06

  No!

• 26:12Laci Mosley?

  This is what you're known for now. I need to see this Monastack commercial.

• 26:16Speaker 06

  My mom's got the clipping somewhere, I'm sure. I'll pull it out for you.

• 26:20Laci Mosley?

  She's proud. Listen, ladies, we get yeast infections, you was a feminist.

• 26:25Speaker 06

  That's right.

• 26:26Laci Mosley?

  Before your time.

• 26:27Speaker 06

  I was a pioneer.

• 26:28Speaker 05

  Child male model feminist.

• 26:30Speaker 06

  That's right.

• 26:31Laci Mosley?

  So we're just adding, we're just gonna keep adding to the...

• 26:33Speaker 06

  Lot of hyphenates to my title.

• 26:35Laci Mosley?

  So Historic Hoodwings, I'll regale you with a famous con or caper, and we'll just get your opinions all throughout. Both of my guests are very famous, and so we have a rule after an incident that if you know, you know, that we only talk about dead people with famous people, so that no one will tweet you and then show their nudes first, deciding not to sell the book that they got pre-order money from. If you know, you know. So today, we're getting into like right before the 20th century.

• 27:05Speaker 06

  Ooh, deep dive.

• 27:06Laci Mosley?

  So like Mary Ellen and also Brumhilde were very fun like

• 27:10Speaker 06

  They were there.

• 27:11Laci Mosley?

  that we were going back in time. So there's a woman named Cassie Chadwick. And so that was her name to some, and then she had half a dozen other names to others. So you know, she was like, she had new names all the time, which I love. Reinvent yourself. If you have four names, you're a scammer. Like if your parents give you four names, you have no choice but to do crime.

• 27:32Speaker 06

  True.

• 27:33Laci Mosley?

  Cassie used charm and other goodwill and maybe even clairvoyance to con banks and merchants out of hundreds of thousands of dollars. And this is olden time, hundreds of thousands.

• 27:42Speaker 06

  That's a good bit.

• 27:43Speaker 05

  That's millions.

• 27:43Laci Mosley?

  Yeah, yeah, inflation.

• 27:45Speaker 06

  Mm-hmm.

• 27:46Laci Mosley?

  As our money gets less valuable every day.

• 27:52Laci Mosley?

  It's very sad. Like somebody pointed out that like, not in our state, but in a lot of states in America, the gas in California has risen to above the minimum wage. Like the national minimum wage.

• 28:03Speaker 06

  Oh, wow.

• 28:04Laci Mosley?

  So it's like 789. So it's more than the minimum wage.

• 28:07Speaker 06

  Yikes. Well, that's a problem.

• 28:09Laci Mosley?

  Ah, yeah, you know, we got a lot of problems. We got a lot of problems. We're just kind of all out here on supplementary vibes, you know? It's sort of the line from our show. So Elizabeth Betty Bigley, so that's Cassie Chadwick. This is her first name, the one someone else gave her. This is her. This is Elizabeth up here in 1904. She must've had that good money, because like, how did you get photos in 1904? She probably had to sit for like four hours.

• 28:34Speaker 06

  Truly. She had time on her hands.

• 28:35Laci Mosley?

  That's why nobody smiled back in the day in olden time photos, because like they had to sit for so long.

• 28:39Speaker 05

  It would hurt.

• 28:40Laci Mosley?

  Yeah, it would hurt. So they all just was like staring. She got the accoutrement, though. That's a lot of clothing. I could not have been in the olden times, because like, how do you even have like a a quickie, like a frisky session? Where you gotta take off several petticoats?

• 28:56Speaker 06

  Maybe it's just the hoop is so big, you know? It's like outwardly.

• 28:59Laci Mosley?

  But that shoulder stuff too.

• 29:01Speaker 06

  Well, that's true. Those shoulder quickies, you know?

• 29:03Laci Mosley?

  Yeah.

• 29:05Speaker 05

  She doesn't really look like a scammer.

• 29:07Speaker 06

  She really doesn't.

• 29:08Laci Mosley?

  See, and I think that's why it worked out for her, cuz she was giving like, lile biting citizen.

• 29:13Speaker 06

  She's letting the sleeves do the work there.

• 29:14Speaker 05

  She just looks very like, simple, together.

• 29:16Laci Mosley?

  Miranda, you like her too much.

• 29:20Laci Mosley?

  Like, I love her outfit, she looks very simple and together.

• 29:23Speaker 05

  I love the expression on her face.

• 29:24Speaker 06

  Scammers love a scammer, and after the lemonade thing, I'm starting to see something happening.

• 29:27Speaker 05

  Takes one to know one.

• 29:28Laci Mosley?

  Right, that's why she didn't get scammed by Granny Motorcycle, cuz she was like, ah, ah Granny Motorcycle, I've been on these streets.

• 29:35Speaker 06

  Spotted it from a mile away.

• 29:36Laci Mosley?

  Polishing lemons in front of the construction site.

• 29:41Laci Mosley?

  You ain't fooling me. So, at the age of 14, she opened a bank account, an Ontario Bank, and used a forged letter of inheritance stating an uncle had died and left her a sum of money. And back in the day, like, if you had a piece of paper and it looked good enough, like, who was gonna check you, boo?

• 29:57Speaker 06

  Mm-hmm.

• 29:57Laci Mosley?

  We had no Google. Like, who, you know, you just asked around.

• 30:00Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 30:01Laci Mosley?

  Like, that's it.

• 30:01Speaker 06

  If your writing's fancy enough, that's pretty much all you need.

• 30:04Laci Mosley?

  Right, you got good penmanship, that was their version of Photoshop. So, every few months, she was arrested, but released on grounds of insanity and warned to never do it again. And this is something I've noticed, cuz like, she was born in 1857, and something I've noticed about like, the turn of the century is like, this was a time when, if like, women were too smart, they'd be like, "She's a witch!", or they'd be like, "She's crazy!", "Put her in the laundry bin!", or "Put her in that place where we make 'em all do laundry cuz they're whores!". Like, these were things that existed. And so, back then, the only benefit of being a woman was there was like, a good amount of sexism around like, women be crazy. So you could just get arrested for doing hella crimes and be like, "I be crazy!".

• 30:47Speaker 06

  But I promise I won't do it again.

• 30:48Speaker 05

  I'll never do it again.

• 30:49Laci Mosley?

  I'll never do it again.

• 30:50Speaker 05

  I'm not crazy anymore.

• 30:52Laci Mosley?

  I was on my period.

• 30:55Speaker 05

  I'm a witch.

• 30:58Laci Mosley?

  You just admit to it. I don't.

• 31:02Laci Mosley?

  So you get out of stuff. So several years later, at the age of 22, Betty devised what would become her trademark scam. Using expensive letterhead and fictitious names of an Ontario lawyer, Betty sent herself a letter stating that a philanthropist had died and left her an inheritance of $15,000. In today's money, that's about $300,000.

• 31:21Speaker 06

  Phew. Okay.

• 31:22Laci Mosley?

  She then had business cards made so that she could announce her new wealth. I love it. Like a costume, she's got a business card.

• 31:30Speaker 06

  She was so confident.

• 31:31Speaker 05

  To announce her new wealth?

• 31:32Laci Mosley?

  Yes.

• 31:33Speaker 05

  So what would the business card say? Like, I just broke a million?

• 31:36Speaker 06

  Betty Bigley, rich person?

• 31:37Laci Mosley?

  Yeah. Rich lady.

• 31:41Laci Mosley?

  She said, "My bank of vagina is overflowing."

• 31:47Laci Mosley?

  I mean, you know, I guess that's what she did when you were rich back in the day. You got some cards printed out and be like...

• 31:51Speaker 06

  You had to have it on paper.

• 31:54Laci Mosley?

  It's me, a rich.

• 31:57Laci Mosley?

  I love it. I don't know. Uh, I get some cards? No, I'll never get those cards. Never. So Betty's plan was simple. She would go into shops, write a check for a larger sum than her purchase. Then she'd ask for the cash difference back. And this is like, she basically pioneered the check fraud scam. You know where like, people will be like, websites will be like, "Oh, do you want to be a secret shopper?" And then like, you sign up and they send you a check for more money than... They're like, "Oh, we sent you $200 extra. Deposit the check, send us 200 back, and you keep the rest." And then the check bounces after like, three or four days, but you've already sent the money.

• 32:31Speaker 06

  Right.

• 32:32Laci Mosley?

  She was doing that...

• 32:33Speaker 06

  Wow.

• 32:33Laci Mosley?

  In the early 1900s.

• 32:35Speaker 06

  Oh, man. So was she like, the first? Was, is this like, the first one?

• 32:39Laci Mosley?

  Right.

• 32:40Speaker 06

  Is she the mastermind of that whole thing?

• 32:42Laci Mosley?

  Yeah, she's definitely an innovator, a pioneer.

• 32:45Speaker 06

  Scammy godmother of check fraud.

• 32:47Laci Mosley?

  So if she was ever questioned if she could afford her purchases, she'd simply produce her calling cards stating that she was an heiress.

• 32:55Speaker 06

  "Not to worry, good sir. As you can see, I am clearly a rich person."

• 33:01Laci Mosley?

  Look at my card, it just says, "Rich."

• 33:05Speaker 06

  "You can clearly see where it is embossed."

• 33:07Speaker 05

  Isn't it so funny to imagine her printing out the cards before she did the scam? Getting all the cards ready?

• 33:13Laci Mosley?

  She's like, "Oh, yeah."

• 33:14Speaker 05

  Waiting for the money to come in?

• 33:16Laci Mosley?

  It's like, "Oh, yeah, these look, these look good."

• 33:21Laci Mosley?

  I love that for her. Y'all gotta print out cards after this. Go to FedEx Kinko's when we finish. Get your former child model cards.

• 33:28Speaker 06

  Do you think whatever the guy was at the version of Kinko's that she had these made was going, "I don't know about this. This seems a little odd to me, but you know, she's paying me, so here's your rich person card."

• 33:40Laci Mosley?

  It must have been the culture. I mean, think about it, probably up until, what, like, the late 90s, we would see in movies and TV shows, like, rich people would be like, "Here's my card." But that was the thing. If you had business cards, we were like, "Your fans said." And now that I think about it, when I first started acting, I had hair shots, and I also had business cards with my face on them.

• 34:06Speaker 05

  What did they say? Just your name?

• 34:09Laci Mosley?

  It said, "Listen, mostly, rich person."

• 34:12Speaker 06

  Future rich person.

• 34:14Laci Mosley?

  Call me now. I'm like, "Ms. Collyo." You call Ms. Collyo, and then call me later, call me after.

• 34:21Speaker 06

  Oh, man, that's great.

• 34:22Laci Mosley?

  So, I get it. Damn, I forgot I had business cards. I really do be doing crime. Wow. Wowser.

• 34:29Speaker 06

  But I'm sure it made a difference, though, because as soon as you get in an audition, you get handed a business card. That's like an automatic, "Oh, oh, oh."

• 34:38Speaker 05

  Like, you know who you're dealing with.

• 34:39Speaker 06

  You sit up and pay attention to a woman who walks in with a business card in addition to the headshot. Yeah, you gotta get that throw down.

• 34:46Laci Mosley?

  You got that too, you put it between your fingers and you flick it at them. Everyone at home, hold up a peace sign, turn it sideways, and then close your fingers, and then flick it. That's how you flick the business card to people. Gotta hit them in the eye.

• 35:00Speaker 06

  Slides right across the desk, just boom.

• 35:03Laci Mosley?

  Fancy.

• 35:03Speaker 06

  Right there.

• 35:04Laci Mosley?

  I love this for her. A short while after, our scammer Cassie, I'm just gonna call her Cassie because she has a lot of names, and now they're calling her Betty. And I'm like, "Who is Betty?" But it's Elizabeth Betty Bigley. She got a lot of names. So, Cassie Chadwick, she spent her time, like, chasing her sister around. So she basically followed her sister when her sister got married, and was like, "Oh, y'all going to Cleveland? Y'all married? Like, I'm also gonna be with y'all as well in addition to in your home."

• 35:30Speaker 06

  Which seems normal.

• 35:33Laci Mosley?

  While staying with them, Betty spent her time appraising the furnishings of her sister's house and used them as collateral to arrange for a bank loan.

• 35:44Speaker 05

  During her sister's wedding?

• 35:46Laci Mosley?

  No, during, that would be also hilarious. Imagine if you had a wedding and your shit get repo'd.

• 35:51Speaker 06

  It's just gone by the time you get back from the room.

• 35:54Speaker 05

  That's all you said? She wasn't, it wasn't during the wedding?

• 35:56Laci Mosley?

  So after her wedding with this man in Cleveland, Betty was like, who was, is Cassie Chadwick. She was like, "Oh, I'm about to move in with y'all. Like, y'all married and I'mma be in here with y'all." And then she lived with them, but she was like, "Ooh, the furniture."

• 36:10Speaker 05

  Oh, so she started figuring out all the furniture prices while she lived there?

• 36:13Laci Mosley?

  She was like, "Is this mahogany?"

• 36:18Laci Mosley?

  She started appraising it all and used it as collateral for a bank loan. Upon discovering, uh, Cassie's newest scheme, her sister's husband kicked her out. So when she found out, they were like, "Cassie, we have lost a lot of silver spoons." And she's like, "I didn't steal them. Here's my business card. I'm a rich person."

• 36:38Speaker 06

  I don't need to steal them. I'm already independently rich.

• 36:41Laci Mosley?

  Look at these business cards. Come on now.

• 36:43Speaker 05

  So the husband got her out. The husband was on to her.

• 36:45Laci Mosley?

  Yeah, so her, so basically her, uh, stepbrother-in-law. It was, what is that called? Brother-in-law?

• 36:51Speaker 05

  Brother-in-law, yeah.

• 36:52Laci Mosley?

  Yeah, "I'm not married." You can tell. I don't know the terms. It was a call, like, "My sister baby daddy."

• 37:01Laci Mosley?

  So at this point, it was 1882. Betty, Elizabeth, Cassie Chadwick, all the same name. If I say a name and it is female pronouns, it's Cassie. Just go with it, y'all. Like, it's too many names. She was 25 and she had a few marriage prospects. Because you know, you was right, Miranda. She was looking cute. She was giving the drip.

• 37:19Speaker 05

  And when you're a rich lady.

• 37:21Speaker 06

  Right.

• 37:22Laci Mosley?

  The door is open up. No, they don't. Honestly, I think the more money you make as a woman, the harder it is to date. Yeah, it is. I'mma start pretending to be more. I'mma show up in rags on dates.

• 37:35Laci Mosley?

  Be like, I need you, sir. Save me.

• 37:38Speaker 06

  Just evoke something in him, you know? It's the perfect plan.

• 37:42Laci Mosley?

  Like, we're gonna go to like the most basic restaurant.

• 37:45Speaker 05

  And be like, wow. You're like at Olive Garden, you're like, wow.

• 37:51Speaker 06

  Unlimited breadsticks.

• 37:53Laci Mosley?

  Wow.

• 37:55Speaker 05

  You go to a buffet.

• 37:57Laci Mosley?

  Like, I could keep going back for more. They have so many clean plates, I can have another. I just gonna start being Oliver Twist on dates. Lisa, may I have some more? They bring water to the table, I'm like, oh.

• 38:13Laci Mosley?

  It's cold. I never have water cold.

• 38:17Laci Mosley?

  How, excuse me, waiter? How do you make the water cold?

• 38:23Speaker 06

  What device do you have in the back that allows the water to be less than room temperature?

• 38:29Laci Mosley?

  This is insane. There's not even any ice cubes in it, how is it cold? I just don't know what refrigeration is.

• 38:38Laci Mosley?

  So, Betty Elizabeth Chadwick, she's 25. I'm gonna try to say Elizabeth Chadwick, so I don't drive y'all crazy. She's 25, she a bad bitch in the streets, everybody wanna marry her, get her hand. And 25 was kinda older in the game, cuz remember, this is when people was dying at they Jesus year. Like, so, you know, the girls were dying, so.

• 38:56Speaker 06

  The clock was ticking, 25, she's, she's just about at the end of her rope.

• 39:00Laci Mosley?

  Yeah, yeah, this we call a spinster. When I read Diane Keaton's book, she said that at her time, when she was coming up, and she learned Meisner from Sidney Meisner, like, you know, like a different time. She was like, yeah, if you didn't make it in the acting business by 25, you were washed up. And I was like, oh my god.

• 39:18Speaker 06

  Oh, no.

• 39:20Speaker 05

  It's over for you at 25.

• 39:22Laci Mosley?

  Diane, this is stressful.

• 39:25Laci Mosley?

  I'm like, I should've gave y'all some more time. But, so she's 25, she a bad bitch, she gotta get married right now. It was in this new neighborhood, cuz she got a new apartment, right? She got kicked out, so she got her own apartment. She rented a flat, claimed she was a widow, introduced herself as clairvoyant Madame Lydia Devoree.

• 39:44Speaker 06

  Oh, now we're getting into it.

• 39:45Speaker 05

  I like it.

• 39:45Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 39:46Laci Mosley?

  She was the first Miss Cleo. Calme now. She opened her clairvoyant shop using the bank loan she obtained with her sister's furniture.

• 39:58Speaker 06

  So he couldn't even stop her before it hap- the furniture was gone and only then did he realize, "Oh, she's got to go."

• 40:04Laci Mosley?

  Bank of vagina America pulled up and was like, "No, we're gonna be taking that." "No, here's our paperwork. This is all ours."

• 40:13Laci Mosley?

  "How you gonna do your sister like this? You are trash." So in this new neighborhood, as a clairvoyant, under her new name, this is when she met Dr. Wallace S. Springsteen. Betty and Dr. Springsteen were married a year later, but when the local paper printed an announcement of the couple's union, several furious merchants, including Betty's sister, showed up at the door demanding to be repaid. So this is like a small town, right? The local paper printing press comes out and they're like, "This bitch got married. Where she stay at?" And I imagine like, what do you think it would be like to organize like a pitchfork mob?

• 40:54Laci Mosley?

  Like, how do you tell the girls like, "We're, guys..."

• 40:59Laci Mosley?

  "Girls, we're doing a mob. Get it, girls. We're doing an angry mob."

• 41:04Speaker 06

  It's that time of the year. We're gonna sharpen those pitchforks.

• 41:08Laci Mosley?

  Right. Who's got their pitchforks? Okay, you got that. Okay, Dave, a shovel. Okay, it's not as good as a pitchfork, but we'll take it. Just keep sticking it in the air, looking angry. Who's got the fire? Okay, yeah. Like, how long in an angry mob? Because you know, this is like the olden times, so they either had to walk with the angry mob or maybe take a horse.

• 41:27Speaker 05

  Wouldn't the anger like wear off after a while? Do you think they held it in until they got close to like the scene?

• 41:32Laci Mosley?

  How do you stay angry for that long? Is there like a cheerleader? Because like, that is what happens when you protest. Like, they have people who come to protest who like have drums and they do like beats. And they hype you up. And like, because you're marching for like sometimes, like one Black Lives Matter protest that I did, we marched for 12 miles. And we got to the 12th mile and I was like, "Okay, so did we get the freedom?"

• 41:57Laci Mosley?

  "Nah, we did it." It's like, "Okay, so we just go home. All right, see y'all next week." "How long we gonna do this?" I'm like, it's been 70 years, I gotta come back out here? This is very ghetto.

• 42:09Speaker 05

  12 miles, a lot.

• 42:11Laci Mosley?

  We marched from Pan Pacific Park to Beverly Hills.

• 42:15Speaker 06

  Wow.

• 42:17Speaker 05

  Did you Uber back?

• 42:20Laci Mosley?

  I did.

• 42:22Laci Mosley?

  Which doesn't feel as inspiring as marching all the way there. But they have.

• 42:26Speaker 05

  After 12 miles, you're allowed to.

• 42:28Speaker 06

  I think you get a pass at that point.

• 42:31Laci Mosley?

  But the thing is, is like, they have people to hype you up, because you're right, Brandon, like, in 12 miles, you know you're disciplined.

• 42:37Speaker 06

  Maybe it's not so bad, guys, I mean.

• 42:41Laci Mosley?

  Have we tried dodging the bullets?

• 42:46Speaker 06

  I was thinking more in the context of Cassie. I was thinking more, it's just furniture, but.

• 42:54Laci Mosley?

  I'm still on the march. Because they have people who beat the drums and like, you know, they have, oh, this is like, not even a chant, it's just like, say her name. So say her name is like a phrase that came about, like, during Black Lives Matter for like, black women who have been slain by the police. And it's like, but they would be like, say her name, Breonna Taylor, say her name, Breonna Taylor. And somebody would be like, beating drums so that we're all on beat, and I guess hyped up and walking a lot of miles in the sun. And I noticed, it actually really made me smile, I noticed when, in June 2020, there were so many more white people at these protests than ever before, because everybody was offbeat.

• 43:33Laci Mosley?

  Because.

• 43:33Speaker 06

  Sorry.

• 43:34Speaker 05

  Why is something off?

• 43:36Laci Mosley?

  Because the protest is like, 50,000, 100,000 people at this point, and so there's points in the line where there aren't black people spread out enough that we can control the chant and keep everybody on beat. So then we had white people being like, what's her name? Breonna Taylor. I was like, what's her name? That's not it.

• 43:54Speaker 06

  Doesn't have the same.

• 43:56Laci Mosley?

  Doesn't have the same snappy.

• 43:57Speaker 06

  Uh, uh, what's, what's her name?

• 43:59Laci Mosley?

  What's her name? Why we out here?

• 44:03Laci Mosley?

  Who we mad about?

• 44:04Speaker 06

  Oh, no.

• 44:07Laci Mosley?

  To your point, like, yeah, who keeps the angry mob hyped up?

• 44:12Speaker 05

  You think there was like a hype man for angry mob back then?

• 44:15Speaker 06

  If we're talking that, there's gotta be someone with a fife at that point.

• 44:21Speaker 06

  We are so mad.

• 44:24Speaker 06

  There has to.

• 44:25Speaker 05

  Don't lose it.

• 44:26Laci Mosley?

  No, burning. They're burning her business cards and effigy.

• 44:32Laci Mosley?

  I just imagine whoever has to hold the fire in an angry mob, like, don't that shit start to burn out? Like a match, don't it get hot?

• 44:38Speaker 06

  Mm-hmm. It's a lot of pressure.

• 44:41Laci Mosley?

  That's the hardest job.

• 44:41Speaker 05

  Like burning their wrists and their hands.

• 44:44Laci Mosley?

  Like, who, are we almost there? Cause y'all, this is fire about to, ooh.

• 44:47Speaker 06

  Does anybody else want to take this for a little bit? Like, maybe like a half mile.

• 44:51Laci Mosley?

  It's getting a little hot. I'm singed.

• 44:59Laci Mosley?

  She'd throw things, wander, and started hoarding. Mom's Alzheimer's was already so hard, but then we found out she had agitation that may happen with dementia due to Alzheimer's disease. And that was a different kind of difficult. So we asked her doctor for more help. Seeing symptoms like these in a loved one? It could be time to ask their doctor about Rexulti, Rexiprazole 2mg. The first FDA-approved treatment for this condition. Rexulti is proven to reduce agitation symptoms. Rexulti should not be used as an as-needed treatment. Elderly people with dementia-related psychosis have increased risk of death or stroke. Report fever, stiff muscles, and confusion, which can be life-threatening, or uncontrolled muscle movements, which may be permanent. High blood sugar can lead to coma or death. Weight gain, increased cholesterol, unusual urges, dizziness on standing,

• 45:42Laci Mosley?

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• 46:29Laci Mosley?

  So yes, they get their angry mobs together and like, "Kidding, girls? Let's go, girls. We doing a mob." And so they pull up on Cassie and her new husband. So fearing his own credit, because he's a doctor, right? Dr. Springsteen paid his wife's debts. The marriage lasted 12 days. Come on, Kim K.

• 46:49Speaker 05

  Only 12 days?

• 46:50Laci Mosley?

  Yes. He paid her debt because he didn't want to be embarrassed. But then he was like, "All right, I gotta get away from you, you scammer." But she was like, "Thanks." That's all I really needed.

• 47:00Speaker 06

  It's a good deal for her.

• 47:01Laci Mosley?

  So with the divorce, uh, this is when Betty, you know, had renamed herself again. Now she is Madame Maria Rosa.

• 47:12Speaker 05

  The names keep getting more fabulous.

• 47:13Laci Mosley?

  They do. Madame Maria Rosa, it sounds like she got some money. I would believe her business card. So she traveled to Pennsylvania and she continued to hone her skills as a scam. And one of her scams included impressing locals by pretending to be the niece of Civil War Union General William Tecumseh Sherman. I don't even know who that is.

• 47:30Speaker 06

  Wow.

• 47:31Laci Mosley?

  She would also pretend to be seriously ill. One witness reported that through a trick of extracting blood from her gums, she led persons to believe that she was suffering from a hemorrhage.

• 47:44Speaker 06

  What's that? So she would just like cut up her gums on a regular basis?

• 47:47Laci Mosley?

  She just starts stabbing up her gums and then letting the blood come out.

• 47:51Speaker 05

  Like run out into the street and start screaming.

• 47:54Laci Mosley?

  Yo, it's wild to me that that worked in that time because if you're bleeding out the mouth, I'm staying away from you.

• 47:59Speaker 06

  Right.

• 48:00Speaker 05

  What would she get out of doing that? Why would people give her money for that?

• 48:03Speaker 06

  I don't know.

• 48:04Speaker 05

  Like for treatment?

• 48:04Laci Mosley?

  Out of kindness, the locals took pity on Madame Marie and raised funds to loan her travel back to Cleveland.

• 48:11Speaker 06

  Oh, no.

• 48:13Laci Mosley?

  She was like, "I gotta get hemorrhage surgery. I need a train ticket."

• 48:18Laci Mosley?

  She's a bad lady. So when they wrote several weeks later, like for repayment, they would receive letters saying that Madame Marie had died. Now, listen, she was bleeding out the mouth, so. In the older times, if you were bleeding out of any orifice.

• 48:33Speaker 05

  She was 25.

• 48:36Speaker 06

  She was approaching that time, you know?

• 48:39Laci Mosley?

  Life was finna be over for her. Modern medicine. I feel like if you bleed out the mouth, I'd be like, yeah, she probably did die, like. Honestly, if you had a nosebleed, I'd be like, yeah, she probably did die, like, it was that time. You could probably die of nosebleed. How embarrassing.

• 48:53Speaker 06

  Probably.

• 48:54Laci Mosley?

  I died of nosebleed.

• 48:58Laci Mosley?

  So, she was telling everybody that Madame Marie had died. One final touch, Cassie wrote another tender tribute to Madame Marie. So then, as a like little razzle dazzle, she wrote an obituary for her former.

• 49:11Speaker 06

  For herself. Wow. Classy.

• 49:15Laci Mosley?

  I think everyone should write their own obituaries. Like, why do we let our families write our obituaries? I need to do that before I die.

• 49:20Speaker 06

  Seems far too risky.

• 49:21Laci Mosley?

  I'm gonna do that tonight. Like, Lacy was a bad bitch. Love by all.

• 49:27Speaker 06

  It's all that needs to be said.

• 49:28Laci Mosley?

  So sexy.

• 49:31Laci Mosley?

  Too sexy to die.

• 49:32Speaker 05

  When she drove her car on the freeway, everybody stared.

• 49:42Laci Mosley?

  I don't know why, Miranda, that reminds me of like you and your car. I've never seen anyone more responsible about a car in my life. Times I've texted Miranda and be like, oh, where you at? She's like, I'm at the car wash.

• 49:55Speaker 05

  I love cleaning my car. I just got a special vacuum from Target, like a special one that like fits in between all the little like tiny areas. Like a normal vacuum couldn't fit.

• 50:08Speaker 06

  You could probably have someone do that. I don't know if you need to have the vacuum yourself.

• 50:11Laci Mosley?

  That's what's wild about it. It's like you go to the car wash and then you look over and it's Miranda Cosgrove with a tiny vacuum.

• 50:18Speaker 06

  That she brought from home.

• 50:19Speaker 05

  I actually, when I go to the car wash, I always vacuum my car first myself for like 30 minutes. And then it goes through and then I take it home and I vacuum it more with my special vacuum at my house.

• 50:28Speaker 06

  I don't think I ever want to get in your car. I'm too scared to mess it up.

• 50:32Laci Mosley?

  This is too much vacuuming.

• 50:35Speaker 06

  I got Cheerios and Crumbs everywhere.

• 50:37Laci Mosley?

  Actually, yeah, I need to know. I don't even have kids. I'm the child and my car is, there's like several boxes in my car right now. Emily, what's up? There's so much stuff in my car and every now and then she's like, Lacey, we should take some things out. We should remove some things. Like, I don't know if you've ever seen that, like, it was probably some, like, viral video. I can't remember who made it, sorry, but it was like, someone tries to get into this woman's car and she's like, oh, I'm sorry, like, I just gotta move this out of the passenger seat. And she like moves something and it's like, you know, some papers or something. And then she moves like, uh, a NutriBullet and then she moves like a vacuum cleaner. There's like all the stuff inside. That's me. And Miranda's the exact opposite, just like sucking up every crumb.

• 51:17Speaker 05

  You should put me on the job. Call me over. I'll bring my vacuum.

• 51:21Speaker 06

  You guys are a match made in heaven.

• 51:23Laci Mosley?

  Truly.

• 51:23Speaker 05

  Let me know.

• 51:25Laci Mosley?

  Miranda gave me a vacuum for my birthday. This woman loves vacuums.

• 51:28Speaker 05

  Her 30th birthday, I got you a vacuum?

• 51:31Laci Mosley?

  I love that vacuum. It's good. It's a quality vacuum.

• 51:34Speaker 06

  Oh.

• 51:35Laci Mosley?

  Yeah, I, I, I'm playing. It's a Dyson, not just a vacuum.

• 51:38Speaker 06

  Then now, now I know you love her. That's how you know.

• 51:43Laci Mosley?

  Oh, my God. Wait, are you wearing the necklace that I gave you as a wrap present the first season? Oh, my God.

• 51:48Speaker 05

  I am wearing it. I work for the special day on the pod.

• 51:51Laci Mosley?

  Oh, I love this. I gave, I gave her that necklace and I bought one too. And I was like, this is probably the gayest present I've ever given anyone.

• 51:58Speaker 05

  It's okay, though. It's hard.

• 52:00Laci Mosley?

  I was like, matching heart necklace.

• 52:03Laci Mosley?

  She reports me to HR. She's like, something's going on here. This woman.

• 52:06Speaker 05

  What if you had one too, Nathan?

• 52:07Speaker 06

  I know. I wish I did.

• 52:08Laci Mosley?

  Oh, Nathan, I need to get you a matching heart necklace.

• 52:11Speaker 06

  We could have all shown up today.

• 52:13Laci Mosley?

  If we could have got Jerry in a matching heart necklace, that would be hilarious.

• 52:16Speaker 06

  Maybe we could get one where it's broken in four pieces. You know?

• 52:20Laci Mosley?

  I've never seen a heart broken in four pieces.

• 52:22Speaker 06

  I haven't either. We're gonna have to commission someone.

• 52:24Laci Mosley?

  The side of the heart is just like a C?

• 52:25Speaker 06

  Yep.

• 52:26Laci Mosley?

  You got the V?

• 52:27Speaker 06

  Yep.

• 52:28Laci Mosley?

  Oh, wow, maybe.

• 52:29Speaker 06

  But then when you put us all together, we are complete.

• 52:31Laci Mosley?

  Aww.

• 52:32Speaker 06

  It's brilliant.

• 52:33Laci Mosley?

  It, that's your new idea. You gotta get out there.

• 52:36Speaker 06

  Pandora, call me. I got a charm for you.

• 52:39Laci Mosley?

  Listen, that's how you know Nathan got a wife. He know about Pandora.

• 52:44Laci Mosley?

  That's the biggest scam is like husbands just like getting one bracelet and then being like every year like, happy anniversary, baby. Here's a new little charm for that bracelet that I got you.

• 52:53Speaker 06

  Little extra jingle.

• 52:54Speaker 05

  Little tiny charm.

• 52:55Laci Mosley?

  Little tiny jingle. Little teeny baby.

• 53:00Laci Mosley?

  Biggest scam of all, you can keep giving somebody the same gift. It's like this is us where they kept letting us reenact the same death. They were like, it's the dad. Oh, he died in a fire. This time we zooming in on the smoke alarm. This time we zooming on the crack pot that started the fire. This time we driving home and they got the little clothes from the dead dad and it's about the dead dad again. Anyway, I need to-

• 53:19Speaker 06

  Not bitter about it at all.

• 53:20Laci Mosley?

  I'm doing terrible on time. Okay, so, uh, back to the story. I know y'all wanna kill me. So, um, at this point Cassie Chadwick is Madame Maria Rosa. She married two of her clients. So she, remember she was doing like make them ups, like psychic visions. So then she married two of her clients because she told her clients, like she was like, oh, you know, I see you like getting married and I see you, but like she would give them premonitions that they were supposed to be with her and they would believe her.

• 53:52Speaker 05

  Did she marry them both at the same time?

• 53:53Laci Mosley?

  No, so she married one and then she married the other.

• 53:56Speaker 05

  The next.

• 53:56Laci Mosley?

  Yeah.

• 53:57Speaker 06

  I don't feel super bad for them. That seems a little-

• 54:00Laci Mosley?

  You don't? I mean-

• 54:00Speaker 06

  I just feel like you're gonna marry me.

• 54:03Speaker 05

  It's a love scam. It's one of those scam.

• 54:05Laci Mosley?

  We're hitting back on the app scams that Miranda don't play with.

• 54:09Speaker 05

  No one's safe.

• 54:11Laci Mosley?

  No one's safe.

• 54:13Speaker 06

  I wonder if there's any psychics out there who are signed up for dating apps who just say, I had a vision and you and I are gonna be together. And if that's ever worked.

• 54:22Laci Mosley?

  I feel like it has to.

• 54:23Speaker 05

  Works for Cassie.

• 54:24Laci Mosley?

  It did. So the first one was a short marriage to a farmer outside of Cleveland. Obviously, he wasn't gonna have it back.

• 54:30Speaker 05

  Oh my god, it was real love. That was the only time she was really in love.

• 54:33Laci Mosley?

  You believe-

• 54:33Speaker 06

  You know, that must have been it.

• 54:35Speaker 05

  That's it. Because why did she marry a farmer? That doesn't go with the rest of her scamming.

• 54:39Laci Mosley?

  I mean, maybe she thought he had some cows and some EIAO money, you know?

• 54:44Speaker 06

  Maybe she thought she was gonna get the whole farm, you know?

• 54:47Speaker 05

  I think she loved him and it was for a short time. It's like she tried to follow her heart for the first time in her life.

• 54:51Laci Mosley?

  Maybe. I love that you've given this such a whimsical, you are definitely a Cassie stan. You're like, oh, I like how she looks. She looks nice. She was following her heart. Well, yeah, she married a farmer and unfortunately he bought the farm and died.

• 55:04Laci Mosley?

  So then she had another premonition. So Hoover, the other, he died in 1888 and left Cassie an estate worth $50,000. So basically 1.5 million dollars in today's money. She had a good premonition. She was like, oh, you are very rich. Ooh.

• 55:20Laci Mosley?

  My sisters are tingling. Did you have a grandmother? Yes, I knew that. She's in the room right now. And she said, "We supposed to get married."

• 55:31Laci Mosley?

  I love this. So, getting caught. Betty then moved to Toledo and reassumed the identity of Madame Lydia Deviere. So she went back to one of her old names. And she's still a clairvoyant, but she knew the girls knew her as Madame Deviere in Cleveland. So she was like, "I gotta go back to Madame Deviere." And one of her clients was a man named Joseph Lamb, who paid Betty $10,000 to service his financial advisor, as well as to do any favors that she asked. Okay. Betty employed Lamb in her schemes by forging promissory notes for several thousand dollars and telling him to cash it at his bank, utilizing his excellent reputation. So she knew in Cleveland, the girls knew that she was a robber. She was like, "I can't go to the bank around here."

• 56:15Speaker 06

  Not allowed there anymore. They've got, they've got that little photograph up on the wall. Someone doodled it.

• 56:23Laci Mosley?

  I feel like they went to the horse, like in the horse and buggy to the bank. And this was like, "I'mma wait in the car. I'll feed the horses. I'm on poop duty. I make sure I get the horse poop up.

• 56:36Laci Mosley?

  You go in there and cash it, though. Oh, Cassie was a bad bitch. Well. So he also cashed several more checks after totaling about $40,000 all in all, which, you know, with inflation, $15,000 was around, what, $300,000? So this is like about a million dollars, or, you know. So Betty was convicted of forgery, sentenced to nine and a half years in state penitentiary. While in prison, uh, this is Cassie, you know Betty, y'all know. She continued to act as a clairvoyant. So in jail, she was like, "I see myself getting out."

• 57:10Speaker 06

  Please don't tell me she convinced a guard, but that was true.

• 57:13Laci Mosley?

  I see you letting me out.

• 57:15Speaker 06

  Reaching into that pocket and grabbing those keys. I see it. I see it so clearly.

• 57:22Laci Mosley?

  I hope she was having visions like Raven-Symone.

• 57:30Speaker 06

  He's just sitting there like, "What is...?"

• 57:31Laci Mosley?

  What's happening? "No, I'm having a vision. Me being free, right now."

• 57:40Laci Mosley?

  I love this for her. So while in prison, she's still being a clairvoyant. So eventually, she pleaded remorse to Governor William McKinley. Eventually, he signed the papers for her release, three and a half years into her sentence. So I'm sure she was like, "I'm so sorry. I'm a woman. We's crazy."

• 57:56Speaker 05

  I'm a witch.

• 57:59Laci Mosley?

  I think with the psychic thing, she could really lock down. "I'm a witch." And they'd be like, "Okay, we get it. We do get it." Okay, she was the first, like, "That's a raven." Like, "Ram, Simone." "You stole her whole bag."

• 58:13Laci Mosley?

  So, once she got out of the jail, Betty Cassie, you know all of her names. Mary Ellen, uh...

• 58:20Speaker 05

  Lydia.

• 58:23Laci Mosley?

  So she, once she got out of jail, her and her son moved into Dr. Chadwick's residence on Millionaire Row, a row of palatial estates on the aristocratic street in the city.

• 58:33Speaker 06

  Ooh, look at that.

• 58:34Laci Mosley?

  Given gilded age.

• 58:36Speaker 05

  Oh, wow. It's beautiful.

• 58:39Speaker 06

  Stunning.

• 58:40Laci Mosley?

  Rand is like, "I live there? I go buy that home in Cleveland on Millionaire Row?" I mean, it's giving Cleveland millionaire, I guess.

• 58:51Speaker 06

  I guess. I guess that's how the millionaires live.

• 58:54Laci Mosley?

  Rural millionaire.

• 58:55Speaker 06

  Maybe it's got that flushing toilet, you know? Like, maybe it's all about the internals.

• 59:00Speaker 05

  Wait, how did she afford it? I didn't understand.

• 59:02Laci Mosley?

  So she afforded it because her second husband Hoover had died and left her fifty grand. She still had to go to jail.

• 59:11Speaker 05

  For three of the nine years, but then she moved on to millionaire.

• 59:14Laci Mosley?

  Yeah, because she stole forty thousand more dollars. And then there's like, "You gotta go to jail now." And then when she got out, I guess she still had some coin.

• 59:22Speaker 06

  So was the guy, wow, huh, wow.

• 59:24Laci Mosley?

  Oh, this is the whole row. Okay, it's giving millionaire when you see the whole row. When I saw that one house, I was like, "I don't know. Just give him a thousand there."

• 59:33Laci Mosley?

  Just give a hundred there.

• 59:36Laci Mosley?

  I'm a $10 heir. We've all been a $10 heir, a hundred heir. Not these two.

• 59:45Speaker 06

  Not since that child modeling money.

• 59:50Speaker 06

  I was a hundred heir like that. I was born a hundred heir.

• 59:55Laci Mosley?

  Born with a, what, a plastic spoon in your mouth? Oh my god, Hefty could never. According to one acquaintance, oh, and so like on A Quick Thing About Millionaire Row, it's a very aristocratic street in the city and she quickly started spending large amounts of Dr. Chadwick's money in an attempt to enter the circle of the wealthy elite families that made up Cleveland. Families included the Rockefellers and the US senators.

• 1:00:23Speaker 05

  She made it, guys.

• 1:00:24Speaker 06

  Wow, she did it.

• 1:00:25Laci Mosley?

  He really ruined forever, Randy. I just wanted to win, she had true love, he died. She had to start scamming again. Like, this is a notebook.

• 1:00:34Speaker 05

  I've spun this whole story in my head.

• 1:00:37Laci Mosley?

  I love it. So according to one acquaintance, if a thing didn't cost enough to suit her, she would order it and throw it away.

• 1:00:47Laci Mosley?

  This kills Nathan.

• 1:00:49Speaker 06

  Oh, it hurts.

• 1:00:49Laci Mosley?

  Probably the most responsible with money at this table. I think you're definitely close, like, y'all might be tied, actually. You're both pretty responsible with money. I'm trash.

• 1:01:01Speaker 06

  It makes me feel a little bit ill.

• 1:01:03Speaker 05

  Why would she throw it away?

• 1:01:04Laci Mosley?

  Because she was trying to show people, like, this is an acquaintance saying this. So people are pulling up to her crib and she's like, "Ugh, a Faberge egg and red? Garbage." Like, she's trying to show people she's rich.

• 1:01:15Speaker 05

  Got it.

• 1:01:15Laci Mosley?

  And I guess that was how you flex, is like you threw all your nice stuff in the

• 1:01:19Speaker 05

  In the trash.

• 1:01:20Speaker 06

  How great would it be to be a person who just walks around at about 2 o'clock in the morning on Millionaire Row and just kind of grabs up all the stuff the rich people throw out because it's not expensive enough? They could have a really nice little operation there.

• 1:01:33Laci Mosley?

  I think a scam equivalent of that, guys out there, is like, go to Goodwill's in really expensive neighborhoods. Because a lot of times, rich people want the tax write-off of just like tossing away like a bunch of nice clothes and stuff because they don't want to consign. You can find some like designer pieces, you can find some nice stuff if you like go in the nice areas. If you go to the Goodwill in the hood, you're gonna get her Goodwill. But if you go to the Goodwill in Beverly Hills, get Beverly Hills Goodwill. If you like thrifting, I'm just saying. That's the equivalent of Cassie throwing out her Faberge eggs. And you just outside, you catch it like, "Thanks, ma'am."

• 1:02:04Speaker 06

  Alright.

• 1:02:05Laci Mosley?

  The neighbors were suspicious and kept away from Cassie. Little did anyone know, she had already begun her biggest scam yet. So, they stayed away from her, you know how they'll be like, "Oh, money, new money." So Cassie was like, "New money," they didn't know where her coins came from, so they were like, "We don't, we don't associate with her." And I mean, they were right, she was doing fine. But, so in 1903, she orchestrated an elaborate ruse to spread a rumor that she was the illegitimate daughter of the wealthy steel magnate Andrew Carnegie. If you don't know about Andrew Carnegie, um, I went to Pitt. So like, uh, Carnegie Mellon was right up the street. I performed at Carnegie Hall, like, you know, he got a lot of stuff in Pittsburgh. And Pittsburgh is very close to Cleveland, um, Ohio. So, you know, she was like, "Oh, I'm Ashley, that's my uncle.

• 1:02:49Laci Mosley?

  Ashley is Andrew Carnegie." She let it slip to an acquaintance that daddy would send her large sums of money and had built her a large inheritance out of guilt. So she found the messiest person she knew. And was like, "Don't tell nobody, girl."

• 1:03:06Speaker 06

  This is just between you and me. You and me.

• 1:03:11Speaker 05

  Why do I feel like I should do it now? You and me.

• 1:03:16Speaker 05

  I like had to do it.

• 1:03:17Laci Mosley?

  Why is it threatening when you're doing it, Rich?

• 1:03:21Laci Mosley?

  I don't know, it's a horror movie.

• 1:03:28Laci Mosley?

  You're a full Sméagol. We're whispering.

• 1:03:32Speaker 05

  I have to take it a notch higher.

• 1:03:34Laci Mosley?

  Do you guys have gossipy friends? Is there anybody in your friend group that you know you can't tell the full story? Or that you might like use to leak some information?

• 1:03:42Speaker 06

  Uh, I generally just don't say anything. I'll just...

• 1:03:46Laci Mosley?

  You say your mom?

• 1:03:49Speaker 05

  My mom will leak the info. There's info I don't want out there and to tell my mom. Everyone will know by morning.

• 1:03:58Speaker 05

  Can't hold it in.

• 1:03:59Laci Mosley?

  I love that. I don't know, like, I like use gossip. I'll tell, like, everybody knows all my business and everybody's business I know. But it's like one person and she's in Jersey, my best friend. And like, she's never out, like, she's not gonna tell anybody. She doesn't know anybody. So I'll like gossip to her. But I don't have any, like, there are people that I know that I can't tell anything. Like, I feel like I would be talking and like mid-talk, they're like tweeting it.

• 1:04:23Speaker 05

  They're like typing it while you're talking.

• 1:04:24Laci Mosley?

  I'm like, are you, are you on voice to text?

• 1:04:28Speaker 06

  No, no, no, wait a second. What did you, go, go back, go back.

• 1:04:30Laci Mosley?

  Talk closer to the mic. You know, we get typos if you're not close to the mic. Cause voice to text loves a typo. If you ever wanna sound drunk without being drunk, use voice to text. So many typos. So, you know, so she tells her messy friend, like, don't you have nobody but I'm very rich? And so, her reputation about her wealth allowed Betty, Cassie, everybody, to begin a sort of Ponzi scheme with the bank loans. So she would take out several loans and use them to pay off each other. So, like, using one credit card to pay off another credit card. She was also able to convince bankers and other wealthy community members to loan her money from their business and personal accounts, raking in over a million dollars total, which today would be over thirty-two million.

• 1:05:14Speaker 05

  So this lady is an evil genius.

• 1:05:16Laci Mosley?

  Yes.

• 1:05:17Speaker 06

  Wow.

• 1:05:18Laci Mosley?

  Cause she finally figured out you can't just straight up rob the bank. You gotta like rob Peter to pay Paul. So then eventually, everybody thinks that they're getting paid back. Or enough people think that they got their money back that your reputation won't be ruined.

• 1:05:29Speaker 06

  Yeah, word can't get around.

• 1:05:31Laci Mosley?

  Yeah.

• 1:05:31Speaker 06

  Oh, wow.

• 1:05:33Speaker 05

  She got better as the years went by.

• 1:05:34Speaker 06

  I know, she really stepped up.

• 1:05:36Speaker 05

  She didn't stick with the same scheme.

• 1:05:37Speaker 06

  Yeah, fifteen thousand dollars, making it up to a million.

• 1:05:39Laci Mosley?

  And isn't it so weird that people will give you money when they think you're rich, but they won't give you money when they think you're poor? And it's like, if you're rich, why you need my money?

• 1:05:48Speaker 06

  Right.

• 1:05:48Laci Mosley?

  Don't you got money over there? I thought you had money over there. What did you give my money for, over here?

• 1:05:53Speaker 06

  Right, right.

• 1:05:54Laci Mosley?

  That's how it works.

• 1:05:55Speaker 06

  It's, no, it's investing, don't worry. It's totally, it's totally legit.

• 1:05:59Laci Mosley?

  I mean, when Elon said that he wanted to buy Twitter, like, he used Tesla stocks as collateral. He took out credit for millions of dollars. And they're like, "Yeah, we'll give you millions of dollars to buy Twitter 'cause you're old and sad."

• 1:06:16Laci Mosley?

  I, it's, it's parts of it I hate, but parts of it I love. I wanna be depressed and buy Twitter.

• 1:06:22Speaker 06

  When there's just nothing left to do.

• 1:06:25Laci Mosley?

  Right now, I buy shoes. I'm like, I wanna be sad one day. I'm like, "Hello?

• 1:06:30Laci Mosley?

  Jack? Jack?"

• 1:06:33Laci Mosley?

  I call him through tears. "Hey, Jack?"

• 1:06:36Laci Mosley?

  I'm going through it. "Can I have, can I buy Twitter real quick?" Crazy. Love, uh, love it and hate it. So, the jig was eventually up and Betty was jailed again. Betty Cassie, Cassie's... I'm so sad when Cassie goes to jail.

• 1:06:51Speaker 06

  It's not such a bad thing when the person who defrauded the people go to jail.

• 1:06:56Speaker 05

  She tried so hard.

• 1:06:59Speaker 06

  She just put in so much effort, darn it.

• 1:07:03Laci Mosley?

  I love the motivational spirit, Miranda. She's like, "Oh, no. She was working so hard at craft. I thought she was gonna be successful at robbery. This is so sad."

• 1:07:16Laci Mosley?

  She was jailed after several bankers that had lent most of their personal fortunes realized she never intended to pay them back. Duh. What did you even lend it to her for? Vibes? What did you, was she opening a business? I don't understand.

• 1:07:29Speaker 06

  I don't know. So... I've always curious what the conversations really have to be. Like, how do you just convince that many people, all in a row, to give you that much money?

• 1:07:38Laci Mosley?

  I think you have to come at it like, you don't really think it's that much money. 'Cause that gives people the confidence. Like, if I was like, "Yo, Nathan, let me hold $300. I'll give it right back. I don't got no cash." You know, you would be, I think that's more convincing than, "Nathan, I really need $300."

• 1:07:53Speaker 06

  Right.

• 1:07:53Laci Mosley?

  Like, "I really, if you would just please, would, I promise I'll pay you back. I'll do anything." You know? One of those sounds like you got it. It's like, if we go to a restaurant or somewhere and it's like, "Oh, I left my wallet at home. I'll Venmo you." Like, we, none of us would be like, "Will you?"

• 1:08:12Laci Mosley?

  You know, we wouldn't be like, let me get my, uh, QR code out right now.

• 1:08:16Speaker 06

  Can you do it before we leave?

• 1:08:19Laci Mosley?

  Before I run my card, you Venmo me right now.

• 1:08:22Laci Mosley?

  I need to see the money. But, you know, like, we wouldn't care. So it's like, if you're talking to other rich people, then once you start making money, you start to forget how much money is worth. Which is the problem that we have with people who are insanely rich and hoarding wealth is like, they don't underst- they don't know what a banana costs, or like, a gallon of milk. They don't know, you know what I mean? Like, sometimes $10,000 can feel like $100 if you're making enough money. So, she was probably just like, "I don't know, you know, throw me a little meal or whatever."

• 1:08:48Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:08:48Laci Mosley?

  You know how I do, I'm Cassie. You know, I'm good for it. My daddy, my daddy got it. Andrew Carnegie, you know him?

• 1:08:56Laci Mosley?

  You know my daddy? God. He got all the money in the world, in his hands, okay? Don't worry. So, One Bank, Citizen National Bank of Oberlin, ended up bankrupted after it had lent her $800,000. And this is old in time.

• 1:09:11Speaker 05

  She bankrupted a bank.

• 1:09:12Laci Mosley?

  Yes.

• 1:09:14Speaker 06

  Single-handedly.

• 1:09:16Laci Mosley?

  How you bankrupt a bank? Bank is right in that, in bankrupt. That's supposed to be, how you bankrupt a bank? Imagine going to your bank, and you have money at that bank, and they loaned it to this bad bitch, Cassie. You go in and take out your lacrosse, and they're like, "Actually, uh, we closing the doors." You go to the bank, it's gotta close.

• 1:09:38Speaker 06

  They just hand out Cassie's card, be like, "Your money's at this address. You're gonna need to go to Cassie's house."

• 1:09:44Laci Mosley?

  Right.

• 1:09:45Speaker 06

  She has all of the money.

• 1:09:46Laci Mosley?

  Her card says "rich," so we hope that you get it back. But we can't, we can't sell you. That's actually so deeply irresponsible, like, of a bank. Cause the bank loaned her essentially other people's money, cause that's what banks do. They hold your money, they don't want you to spend it, they wanna be able to give your money to somebody else's loan, and then charge interest on it so they can make more money. So she-

• 1:10:08Speaker 05

  She took everyone's money.

• 1:10:09Laci Mosley?

  She took everybody's money.

• 1:10:11Speaker 05

  I would, how can you convince a bank to give all the money to only you?

• 1:10:14Speaker 06

  I don't know. Where's that manager? Who's the guy, who's the guy who looked at that balance sheet and said, "Huh?" Well, there's nothing in the vault. And we gave it all to one person. I think, I think there's something wrong here.

• 1:10:28Laci Mosley?

  You go in the vault, we're all the gold and money supposed to be, it's just a janitor sweeping. Like, yeah, we had nothing to hear much.

• 1:10:34Speaker 06

  I owe you sticky note on the table.

• 1:10:36Laci Mosley?

  Right.

• 1:10:37Speaker 06

  I'm totally good for it.

• 1:10:38Laci Mosley?

  I owe you one bank. That's crazy. So it wasn't until Betty Cassie denied all connection with Andrew Carnegie that they realized that that was a lie too. So she'd been telling everybody, she was like, this is my, this is my daddy, he love me, but I'm a bastard. She had a whole spicy story.

• 1:10:58Speaker 06

  Game of Thrones in it.

• 1:10:59Laci Mosley?

  Right, this reminds me of like Arnold Schwarzenegger.

• 1:11:03Laci Mosley?

  Cause you know he had that wife with his, uh, housekeeper, I mean that baby with, that wife. I said he had that wife with his housekeeper. Child, I need to go to bed. He had that baby with his housekeeper, so, you know. It's scandal. I love a scandal. So in 1905, we're getting to the end of this, guys. In 1905, Cassie Chadwick, she was found guilty of conspiracy to, to fraud a national bank and conspiracy against the government and was sentenced to 10 years in prison.

• 1:11:32Speaker 05

  That's it, that's all she had.

• 1:11:33Speaker 06

  That is light.

• 1:11:34Speaker 05

  Cause by now she's like 30 something.

• 1:11:36Laci Mosley?

  We got a mugshot up here.

• 1:11:38Speaker 05

  Oh no, she's not 30, she's like.

• 1:11:40Laci Mosley?

  Yeah, she was.

• 1:11:41Speaker 06

  No, that might be what 30 looked like back then, I'm not sure.

• 1:11:46Speaker 06

  Those were harder times.

• 1:11:47Laci Mosley?

  They were, they were much harder times. Wait, Cassie, you, it's giving elderly.

• 1:11:53Speaker 05

  You know what's weird, she looks harder when she was younger. Like, she looks like she softened up a bit in her old age.

• 1:12:00Laci Mosley?

  But you know what, she was richer when she got arrested. Cause she had stole the equivalent of 32 million dollars, so she living good.

• 1:12:06Speaker 05

  Oh, she's been living the good life.

• 1:12:08Laci Mosley?

  She eating good.

• 1:12:09Speaker 06

  She was moisturizing for sure.

• 1:12:10Laci Mosley?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:12:11Speaker 05

  That's why she was able to crack a smile.

• 1:12:12Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:12:12Laci Mosley?

  She probably could live through a cold. She probably had that good tuss.

• 1:12:19Speaker 06

  Scurvy free, all year round, baby.

• 1:12:22Speaker 05

  Don't tell me she died in jail, did she?

• 1:12:26Laci Mosley?

  Randy's so invested. She's like, did she find love again? Prison love? I'll take anything.

• 1:12:32Speaker 05

  Give me something.

• 1:12:32Speaker 06

  Has Nicholas Sparks adapted this story yet?

• 1:12:35Laci Mosley?

  Come on, give me.

• 1:12:39Laci Mosley?

  Um, so Andrew Carnegie himself attended the trial just to see her face.

• 1:12:45Speaker 05

  Just to see his bastard child.

• 1:12:49Laci Mosley?

  If, if he attended, I would've been like, daddy.

• 1:12:53Speaker 06

  That was your one last hope right there.

• 1:12:54Laci Mosley?

  They didn't have DNA tests? And you can't tell me Andrew Carnegie, the steel millionaire, wasn't out here fucking?

• 1:13:03Laci Mosley?

  Come on now, it's a chance. It's a light chance that they sent her mama away to one of them laundry places for the whores who had sex.

• 1:13:11Speaker 06

  They could've at least taken, she could've shaved off several years off that sentence by just leaning into the dad thing, saying, see? He came.

• 1:13:19Laci Mosley?

  Right.

• 1:13:20Speaker 06

  That's the evidence.

• 1:13:21Laci Mosley?

  No, we're, we're absolutely right. She should've. If the second he stepped in the court, I would've been like, daddy. Papa?

• 1:13:28Speaker 05

  I forgive you.

• 1:13:29Laci Mosley?

  I forgive you. Thank you for coming. I knew you'd come. Gotta say, I knew you'd come. Make it seem like you're in on it.

• 1:13:38Laci Mosley?

  A lot of points to him and be like, he got it. He good. We good for him. Just like, he trying to run out the door.

• 1:13:44Laci Mosley?

  Like, what they gonna do? Oh, gosh. But yeah, so he pulled up and was like, I gotta see this woman's face who been lying. So according to him, the whole thing could've been avoided if anyone had asked him, stating, why have I not signed a note in the last 30 years? Like, he was saying, like, everyone knew about this rumor, talked about it amongst each other, behind his back, all the time. Like, basically Andrew would walk into the room, everybody would be like, oh, what's up? Hello, Andrew?

• 1:14:15Laci Mosley?

  They're like, yeah, he was sleeping with this woman and they sent her away to the looney bin because she had a baby and then that's the cash he had with. Oh, Andrew, yeah, what's up?

• 1:14:23Laci Mosley?

  No, we got you a seat right here. Sit down, yeah.

• 1:14:25Speaker 06

  We were just talking about money, money, money.

• 1:14:27Laci Mosley?

  You want some loaves and fishes? Yeah, no, we got you.

• 1:14:31Laci Mosley?

  Is that too far back? I guess that's biblical.

• 1:14:33Speaker 05

  Loaves and fishes?

• 1:14:34Speaker 06

  How old was Andrew Carnegie?

• 1:14:36Laci Mosley?

  What would he even know? In the 1900s.

• 1:14:41Laci Mosley?

  What were they eating? I have no clue. I don't know, grapes. You always see that in olden times.

• 1:14:49Speaker 05

  Rich people with grapes?

• 1:14:50Laci Mosley?

  Yeah, rich people definitely had grapes.

• 1:14:53Speaker 06

  You know, rich people with their grapes.

• 1:14:55Laci Mosley?

  Oh, they loved the grapes.

• 1:14:57Speaker 05

  They liked to eat fat grapes. Near grapes. Holding grapes.

• 1:15:02Laci Mosley?

  What was that a thing? Bowls with grapes.

• 1:15:05Speaker 06

  Someone holding a grape over their face, slowly lowering it down.

• 1:15:09Laci Mosley?

  More grapes. Like, grapes was...

• 1:15:10Speaker 05

  Licking a grape. It was really weird back then.

• 1:15:13Laci Mosley?

  It was a real flex. If you didn't have no grapes, are you even rich?

• 1:15:16Speaker 06

  Big grape was killing it back then.

• 1:15:17Laci Mosley?

  Big grape energy.

• 1:15:21Laci Mosley?

  On October 10th, 1907, Cassie Chadwick died on her birthday. I'm sorry, Miranda. At age 50, that she lived pretty long.

• 1:15:30Speaker 06

  Oh, my gosh, that was a 50-year-old?

• 1:15:32Laci Mosley?

  In a prison cell.

• 1:15:34Speaker 05

  Alone.

• 1:15:36Laci Mosley?

  So luxurious, it rivaled Al Capone's.

• 1:15:40Speaker 05

  What? So her prison cell was amazing?

• 1:15:45Laci Mosley?

  Yes. I guess they didn't try to seize her assets. Maybe that was before the F, the B, and the I decided they were the repo man. Because now they come back and get all your shit. If you break the law, they'd be like, all right, Miranda, we'll be taking that necklace. Uh, you can also come up off that shirt.

• 1:15:59Speaker 05

  In the olden days, you were allowed to bring your belongings to your cell?

• 1:16:03Laci Mosley?

  Like, they could, like, pay, you know, because a prison is for profit. So they could, like, pay, put the money on your books, or, like, give you a couture.

• 1:16:11Speaker 06

  You paid in points for the upgrade to business class.

• 1:16:14Laci Mosley?

  Because when rich people go to jail, they be having Xboxes, they be having the best food. They not eating ramen and making jail Laffy Taffy on TikTok. They living good.

• 1:16:24Speaker 05

  So even if you stole the money to get rich, you could use the money to live a better life in jail?

• 1:16:28Speaker 06

  You defrauded the government, but the government is going to allow you to stay in jail in a really cush setup with the government that you defrauded from them.

• 1:16:37Laci Mosley?

  I think that at that point, they weren't hit, the government, because the government is a scam. And I think they started realizing like, oh yeah, we're the government. We could just rob them back and at least get some of the money back. And it's never gonna go to who actually got robbed. We just go take it and sell it at auction and keep it for government money.

• 1:16:52Speaker 06

  Right.

• 1:16:53Laci Mosley?

  That's like literally what raids are. Like when police like do no knock warrants, which is why we don't want them anymore. It's literally so that they can pull up on gang bangers and hopefully come up on a bunch of cash. And like, there's no way to account for how much cash these gang bangers have. So they turn in some, but they pocket a lot. You know what I mean? It's like they're basically, it's like they're like, uh, Black Friday at Walmart. You know, they show up at 5:00 AM, they knock the doors down, they fight everybody and they steal as much as they can. But at this point, the government did, I, I don't know if this, like they didn't get enough restitution from this woman. But obviously she was living lavish.

• 1:17:27Speaker 06

  Man.

• 1:17:28Laci Mosley?

  Which I.

• 1:17:29Speaker 05

  I can live with that ending.

• 1:17:30Speaker 06

  Yeah, I think that's a, that's a satisfactory Miranda Cosgrove resolution.

• 1:17:36Speaker 05

  She didn't have it all, she was in jail. She did some time for the bad stuff she's done.

• 1:17:40Speaker 06

  Still had some.

• 1:17:41Laci Mosley?

  Yeah, this is before the times where the government would be like, Miranda, we're gonna use your hand over the little vacuum. You're not gonna be little vacuuming.

• 1:17:49Speaker 06

  Anything but that.

• 1:17:50Laci Mosley?

  That's literally the thing, she's like holding on to, like fighting with the FBI. No, you can take everything, but not my baby vacuum.

• 1:17:58Speaker 06

  That's part of her plea deal for sure. I'll plead guilty to everything, just let me go to jail with my vacuum.

• 1:18:02Laci Mosley?

  Miranda, they took the car though, you don't even need the baby vacuum, oh.

• 1:18:05Speaker 06

  It's for the corners of the cell. It gets into all those cracks and crevices.

• 1:18:11Laci Mosley?

  Miranda's just in jail with a baby vacuum.

• 1:18:13Speaker 06

  The world's most meticulous jail cell you've ever seen in your life.

• 1:18:18Laci Mosley?

  And fraud. And we're back and it's time for Scammer of the Week, the last tiniest segment of the show before I let these icons go. This has been so fun, I feel like we're like back at work again, which is nice.

• 1:18:30Speaker 06

  This is the best, I feel like we're on lunch break right now.

• 1:18:32Laci Mosley?

  Right, we, we had some good lunch breaks. So a Florida man was charged with 114 counts of various fraud after he was caught in an alleged decades-long scheme to defraud Florida State's Division of Unclaimed Property. So you know how like if you don't cash a check or like you don't get a check? Like there's a website you can go on and see if you have checks that never got to you or didn't come to your house. And then if you put in your information, they'll mail you the checks, like, and you can cash them.

• 1:18:56Speaker 06

  Right.

• 1:18:57Laci Mosley?

  So they have sort of like those kinds of things for like unclaimed property too. Um, so Alvaro Aburu, 38, claimed more than $2 million worth of property.

• 1:19:06Speaker 06

  Wow.

• 1:19:08Laci Mosley?

  Come on, Alvaro.

• 1:19:09Speaker 05

  He was born in the wrong time. He should have ended up with Cassie.

• 1:19:12Speaker 06

  Truly. They could have been great together.

• 1:19:14Laci Mosley?

  Alvaro is kinda cute. He gives our own property.

• 1:19:18Speaker 06

  Yeah, that smile says, "Trust me."

• 1:19:20Laci Mosley?

  It's giving landlord.

• 1:19:25Speaker 05

  He doesn't really look like a criminal or anything.

• 1:19:27Laci Mosley?

  No, I would give him the property. Also, if it's unclaimed, then why can't he claim it?

• 1:19:31Speaker 06

  Right.

• 1:19:31Laci Mosley?

  This country was like, what was claimed by people, people were living here and then Christopher Columbus and the rest of the colonizers was like, "We gonna claim it again." Like, come on now. What's the statute on colonizing? We need to define that. Why could you do that in the 1800s? You could go stick a flag somewhere and be like, "This is mine now." Like, we did that shit to the moon. It's like, can I own the moon? Like, why, why you get to own the moon? This don't seem fair.

• 1:19:53Speaker 06

  If an astronaut can go up and claim the moon, I can go to a state's unclaimed property program and just say, "Look, no one else is gonna take it."

• 1:20:01Laci Mosley?

  Right.

• 1:20:01Speaker 06

  "I'll take your junk off your hands. I'm doing you a favor."

• 1:20:04Laci Mosley?

  Unclaimed.

• 1:20:05Speaker 06

  Right.

• 1:20:06Laci Mosley?

  That sounds like available to me. Free, open.

• 1:20:10Speaker 06

  We're looking at a lost and found right now.

• 1:20:12Laci Mosley?

  Right. And everybody knows, after a while, it'll lost and found. You can get in there and just take what you want.

• 1:20:18Speaker 06

  That's right. If you go back by, you've gone four times and it's still there, pfft. I mean.

• 1:20:23Laci Mosley?

  Exactly. Wait, that's actually surprising to me, Nathan, because I feel like you'd be the one who would just like leave it in there forever.

• 1:20:28Speaker 05

  He'd be like, "They might come back someday."

• 1:20:30Speaker 06

  I know. That is what I would do.

• 1:20:31Laci Mosley?

  They'd be like writing letters and looking postage, like, "One day, they'll find this North Face hoodie."

• 1:20:38Speaker 06

  I was just trying to, I was trying to sound cool. That's totally what I would do.

• 1:20:41Laci Mosley?

  Oh, you are cool, Nathan. It's okay to follow rules. Somebody has to.

• 1:20:46Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:20:47Laci Mosley?

  If nobody follows rules, then I have, I can't break them. I need everybody to follow the rules, so I don't have to.

• 1:20:53Speaker 06

  You know, a division.

• 1:20:55Laci Mosley?

  So, the Division of Unclaimed Property is responsible for holding on to and facilitating the return of valuables to Floridians who may have forgotten about it, like old bank accounts or abandoned safe deposit boxes. Wow. So he's getting like the money, money. So, Alvaro often used fake names and the names of dead people to forge documents in order to wrongly claim unclaimed property. I'm sorry, if you're dead, then like, it's not yours anymore. You are dead. I can't own anything when I'm dead. What am I supposed to do when I'm dead?

• 1:21:22Speaker 06

  Right. That, I don't, I'm feeling less and less, like, he's close to doing a public service.

• 1:21:31Speaker 06

  He's helping the state save on storage costs is what I'm hearing.

• 1:21:34Laci Mosley?

  Right. And also like if it's unclaimed, you just gonna let it sit there valuable resources and not let someone use them?

• 1:21:40Speaker 06

  Reduce, reuse, recycle. He's trying to save the planet from the dead people's stuff.

• 1:21:44Laci Mosley?

  Is he Greta Garwood? That's not her. That's the lady from the movie huh? Greta Thunberg.

• 1:21:57Laci Mosley?

  Y'all be sounding dumb on here sometimes. Greta Thunberg. I know what I'm talking about. So he first started this scam in April of 1999 and he was not caught until March of 2020. He would file claims and then deposit the money received into any of his many bank accounts for his fake companies. He had been released on a hundred and seventy-eight thousand dollars bond, which obviously he got, well, he got two million at least, so obviously he got a hundred and seventy-eight thousand. Free this man. Free Alvaro. Like what are we gonna put him in jail for? Jail costs taxpayers money. You telling me I gotta pay money for him claiming dead people's things?

• 1:22:31Speaker 06

  Right.

• 1:22:32Laci Mosley?

  Like we should all claim dead people's things. They should just hand that shit out.

• 1:22:34Speaker 06

  I mean, what did they do to grave robbers back in the day? This is just...

• 1:22:37Laci Mosley?

  I mean, they did try to give, if they caught them, they would put them in jail. Yeah, cuz you said it essentially. It's a grave robbery.

• 1:22:44Speaker 06

  Yeah, well, yeah, but...

• 1:22:46Laci Mosley?

  But also like you're dead. Like how you gonna, when I go to court, like who, is it the people versus, or is it like the dead dude versus me? Like he dead.

• 1:22:54Speaker 06

  Maybe the ghost comes and just sits at the desk and is like, "I am Jack."

• 1:23:00Laci Mosley?

  Ghost v robber.

• 1:23:03Laci Mosley?

  Right, like if you, I'm sorry, if you get buried in some gold and whatnot, you know, we gonna have to rob you. This seems fair.

• 1:23:09Speaker 05

  Why do you think the family members don't claim the stuff?

• 1:23:12Speaker 06

  Maybe they just don't know.

• 1:23:13Laci Mosley?

  Yeah.

• 1:23:14Speaker 05

  They never knew.

• 1:23:15Laci Mosley?

  Sometimes they're not close to people. Like you might have a distant uncle who like you...

• 1:23:19Speaker 05

  You haven't talked to in a really long time.

• 1:23:21Laci Mosley?

  So that's a lesson to all of us. Get in contact with all your distant relatives.

• 1:23:26Speaker 06

  You never know who's dead and loaded.

• 1:23:29Laci Mosley?

  Call up your great uncle Marvin and ask if he has any property.

• 1:23:34Speaker 06

  Or if he has any plans to die anytime soon.

• 1:23:38Laci Mosley?

  How you feeling about life, Uncle Marvin? Good.

• 1:23:41Speaker 06

  Do you intend to remain unmarried and childless for the foreseeable future? And so your assets will be available at the time of your death?

• 1:23:48Laci Mosley?

  If you were to rate life from one to five, with one being the worst and five being the best, where you?

• 1:23:55Laci Mosley?

  How long you want to stay alive? Well, guys, that brings us to the end of a very fun episode. Thank you guys so much for coming and being here. Nonsense. We always ask on this podcast, where would you like to be found? Anything you want to promote, anywhere you want to be found.

• 1:24:12Speaker 06

  That's such a deep question.

• 1:24:14Speaker 05

  Where would you like to be found? I was thinking it on a deep level too. I thought you meant like when you died. Where would you? I was like, this is such a weird way to wrap up the episode. I was like.

• 1:24:23Speaker 06

  It gets so dark.

• 1:24:23Laci Mosley?

  We had a great time, so where would you like to be buried?

• 1:24:26Speaker 06

  Where would your body, if you were going to be discovered anywhere? What cool location would your dead body, your corpse want to be shown?

• 1:24:35Speaker 05

  Like, all these things were going through my head.

• 1:24:37Speaker 06

  I was thinking like the La Brea Tar Pits or something cool, you know?

• 1:24:41Laci Mosley?

  You have a specific thing in mind?

• 1:24:43Speaker 06

  I don't know, it seemed cool.

• 1:24:45Laci Mosley?

  I feel like that was too quick.

• 1:24:46Speaker 06

  Former child model Nathan Kress was discovered at the La Brea Tar Pits.

• 1:24:50Laci Mosley?

  Okay, that headline kind of hit you.

• 1:24:51Speaker 06

  Right? Come on. That's old Hollywood, baby.

• 1:24:54Laci Mosley?

  That is old Hollywood. Okay, that's kind of cute. Okay. Where would you like to be found? No, no, no, no. But like.

• 1:25:01Speaker 05

  Former child model Miranda Cosgrove found at Disneyland.

• 1:25:09Speaker 06

  That's accurate.

• 1:25:10Laci Mosley?

  Yeah, it is.

• 1:25:11Speaker 06

  Statistically, you probably would.

• 1:25:12Laci Mosley?

  The animal shelter is exactly where you would be.

• 1:25:14Speaker 05

  Or vacuuming her Prius. I don't know.

• 1:25:20Laci Mosley?

  That was never the question. I want to make that clear.

• 1:25:23Speaker 05

  Okay. I want people to watch the last episode of the show. Is this going to air before that?

• 1:25:28Laci Mosley?

  It's going to air as a streaming.

• 1:25:30Speaker 05

  Okay, awesome. So the whole second season would be nice.

• 1:25:33Speaker 06

  That's where we can be found.

• 1:25:34Speaker 05

  We're going to go big.

• 1:25:35Speaker 06

  I, Carly, I'm tearing my blouse.

• 1:25:37Laci Mosley?

  I'd like to watch one episode.

• 1:25:38Speaker 05

  Just one episode, please.

• 1:25:39Laci Mosley?

  Please, baby.

• 1:25:42Speaker 05

  Just the finale episode. You don't even have to know what's going on.

• 1:25:45Laci Mosley?

  No, you gotta Cassie Chadwick this. Act like your hero. Ask him to watch everything from the original.

• 1:25:52Speaker 05

  The most recent.

• 1:25:53Speaker 06

  Gonna get those numbers up. Okay, and then, so what about social medias for you?

• 1:25:59Speaker 05

  Oh, I have an Instagram.

• 1:26:01Speaker 06

  What?

• 1:26:01Speaker 05

  I do, yeah. Not a lot of people have that. And it's under my name, Miranda Cosgrove.

• 1:26:07Laci Mosley?

  Yes, if you wanna see some pictures of her in that clean car.

• 1:26:11Speaker 05

  You can see him. How about a treat?

• 1:26:15Speaker 06

  My social is for me at Twitter and Instagram, at Nathan Kress. And then my podcast, Radioactive Dads, is on Adobe Radio every Wednesday at 3 PM Pacific, 6 PM Eastern, or anywhere you get your podcasts.

• 1:26:26Laci Mosley?

  Yes.

• 1:26:27Speaker 06

  Me and my buddy just talk about being dads and shoot the breeze.

• 1:26:30Laci Mosley?

  Isn't that so great? Nathan's such a great dad. Such a fantastic dad.

• 1:26:34Speaker 06

  Doing my best.

• 1:26:35Laci Mosley?

  With the cutest kids. I mean, London's clearly the better part.

• 1:26:40Speaker 06

  Obviously. A hundred percent.

• 1:26:43Laci Mosley?

  But you're doing a lot.

• 1:26:44Speaker 06

  I'm doing the best that I can, and London is doing everything else to fill in all of the places where I just am, you know.

• 1:26:52Laci Mosley?

  Nathan, you're exceptional even to regular terms. You're a great dad, but also like, if you ever worry, the bar is on the floor. In Los Angeles, when you drive around, there are billboards that are like, "Take time to be a dad. Have you seen your child? Talk to them today."

• 1:27:09Speaker 06

  Sing them a song. Read them a book.

• 1:27:13Laci Mosley?

  Hug your son.

• 1:27:16Laci Mosley?

  These are advertisements. That's why you see Coca-Cola, you see Paramount Plus, and you just see like.

• 1:27:21Speaker 06

  Do your job.

• 1:27:23Laci Mosley?

  Have you played catch with your son?

• 1:27:27Speaker 06

  In the last year?

• 1:27:28Laci Mosley?

  And you never see those for women. It's never like, "Take time to be a mom." Like, it's just expected. But dads are like, "Please, don't, like, when you left the house, go back there."

• 1:27:40Speaker 06

  I wonder if a dad's driving along the street and sees a billboard and goes, "Oh, shoot, that's right. Oh, dang it, I forgot to be a dad today. Doggone it."

• 1:27:48Laci Mosley?

  "Dammit, I gotta, Siri, make sure, uh, put everybody in my calendar to be a dad."

• 1:27:55Laci Mosley?

  I got y'all. No, and guys, as always, you can search on your friends and family, just hit up the podcast at [email protected]. Just make sure your scam is retired because we don't want to fuck up your bag, y'all. I love the DMs, I love the tweets, I will engage with y'all, but if you're DMing me your scam, it's not gonna get read on the show. So go ahead and hit copy paste and email it to the podcast, please. I'm not gonna open up, but I do respond to comments. And then, guys, if you want to follow me and my shenanigans, D I V A L A C I, D Valacy on all platforms, all of season two of iCarly is streaming now on Paramount Plus. Get into it, yes. Congregation, stay Cassying or Betty-ing, room-hilling?

• 1:28:40Speaker 06

  Madame Marie-ing?

• 1:28:42Laci Mosley?

  Madame Marie Devero-ing?

• 1:28:44Speaker 05

  Was there a Lydia?

• 1:28:45Laci Mosley?

  Yeah, there was a Madame Lydia-ing?

• 1:28:48Speaker 06

  Lydia Devero-Marie Rosa?

• 1:28:50Laci Mosley?

  Rosa, yeah. Madame Marie Rosa Devero Lydia-ing?

• 1:28:54Speaker 06

  You got a lot of things to choose from. You can ing just about anybody you want at this point.

• 1:28:59Laci Mosley?

  Stay Chadwick-ing. Bye-bye. Scam Goddess. This has been an Earwolf production in association with Team Coco. Scam Goddess stars and is hosted by me, Lacey Mosley, AKA Scam Goddess. It's produced by Judith Cargbo, engineered by Marina Faiz, and researched by Kalen Brandt. Stay scheming.

• 1:29:22Speaker 06

  This has been a Team Coco production in association with Earwolf.

• 1:29:32Speaker 03

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• 1:31:03Speaker 03

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• 1:31:48Speaker 01

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