Giggling about movie premieres, jellyfish hair, and Japanese spoons

Hannah took a risk in front of Amy Schumer and our Super Bowl fashion correspondent Paige gives her report. get tickets to live shows sign up for our newsletter pre-order our book

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Paige DeSorbo?

  This episode of Giggly Squad is brought to you by McDonald's. The Quarter Pounder with Cheese with Fries and a Drink now for $8 for a limited time only. You know I love getting McDonald's after a Giggly Squad live show, and we're going on tour again, which means my QPC order is about to be amazing. My Quarter Pounder with Cheese. The Quarter Pounder with Cheese uses 100% fresh beef cooked right when you order. No artificial flavors, colors, fillers, or preservatives. It's hand-topped with onions and two slices of cheese arranged in a star for that cheesy goodness in every bite. And lastly, perfectly placed pickles side by side. I absolutely love McDonald's. And for a limited time only, prices and participation may vary.

• 0:42Paige DeSorbo?

  Prices may be higher in Hawaii, Alaska, and California, and for delivery. Fresh beef not available in Alaska and Hawaii. Offer not valid for delivery. This episode is sponsored by the new Hershey's Creme Bars in Salted Caramel and Affogato. Lately, I've been realizing that luxury doesn't have to mean some huge splurge. Sometimes it's just taking a few minutes to yourself during a busy day. I have one of these moments, oh, I don't know, every day around 2 o'clock, whether that's making a pick-me-up coffee, or maybe I just need to scroll for a little bit on the couch. That's why I'm actually so excited about the new Hershey's Salted Caramel and Affogato Creme Bars available now. I absolutely love a treat-yourself moment in the middle of the day,

• 1:26Paige DeSorbo?

  and this is a classic Hershey's Milk Chocolate layered with the Salted Caramel or Affogato Creme filling, so it feels a little elevated while still being your favorite Hershey's chocolate. Pick up the new Hershey's Creme Bars in Salted Caramel or Affogato wherever you shop for snacks and choose happiness with every bite.

• 1:46Speaker 01

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• 2:17Speaker 02

  Sup, Giggler? Gary, fix the Wi-Fi. Manifest that shirt. We can't be managed.

• 2:27Paige DeSorbo?

  I mean, the day just got away from me.

• 2:31Hannah Berner?

  What's up, my game day gigglers? Okay?

• 2:33Paige DeSorbo?

  Yes, honey.

• 2:34Hannah Berner?

  We had a correspondent on the ground floor.

• 2:39Hannah Berner?

  This is a sports podcast. We used our own business credit card. We put it on the business. We sent Paige to the Super Bowl. Paige, what did you see on the game day? What did you? This is my sports caster voice. What did you see?

• 2:52Paige DeSorbo?

  Thank you so much for putting me on the ground, in the field, working.

• 2:55Hannah Berner?

  The gigglers need to know, what was the vibes? What was your opinions?

• 2:59Paige DeSorbo?

  You know what? It's so funny because the whole game, people were like so hyped about it and all this stuff. And like, I couldn't really focus till after halftime because that's when I got my TikTok. You know, and I was like, and once I got my TikTok, I was like, okay, and what's going on again? What are we doing here?

• 3:15Hannah Berner?

  It was perfect. It was perfectly executed.

• 3:18Paige DeSorbo?

  I thought it was like equal parts funny, equal parts like, she's here. Here we go.

• 3:23Hannah Berner?

  I do think you're kind of, um, like, look, I'm the fat ass community and you're kind of taking advantage of that for your own sense of humor. Um, I don't want to say that you're...

• 3:37Paige DeSorbo?

  Coming for your brand, but also...

• 3:39Hannah Berner?

  She literally goes, clap if you a fat ass. And I was like, that would be hilarious if...

• 3:45Paige DeSorbo?

  If I did it.

• 3:47Hannah Berner?

  No, no, not if I did it. No, I'm like, she has been doing Pilates. Maybe there's a fat ass that I haven't seen.

• 3:56Hannah Berner?

  No, I'm just kidding. You have the perfect little booty. The perfect little booty.

• 4:00Paige DeSorbo?

  Wait, it's so funny because I actually like met a real sports reporter. This woman, Diana Rusini. I think she's on...

• 4:08Hannah Berner?

  A lot of Italians are good at, like Tina Savaccio.

• 4:12Paige DeSorbo?

  It's because we can talk, honey. We can talk.

• 4:15Hannah Berner?

  They can talk. Put me on the field, I'll talk to some motherfuckers.

• 4:18Paige DeSorbo?

  And I literally was chatting with her and I was like, quick question. Um, when did you like learn about sports?

• 4:26Hannah Berner?

  What did she say?

• 4:28Paige DeSorbo?

  She was just like, oh, like, well, I went to college for broadcast journalism and then like I just like went into sports and she was like, you don't really have to know like every single thing. And I was just like, oh, okay.

• 4:39Hannah Berner?

  As someone who wanted to be a sports broadcaster before all my dreams died,

• 4:42Paige DeSorbo?

  Right.

• 4:43Hannah Berner?

  I, I know that there's like different types of commentators, like there's like the one who's just vibes. Like it's like, welcome back. And you're supposed to like, look happy, excited. And then there's the color commentator, who tends to be like a former athlete or someone who's like, knows a lot. So your job is to like, ask them what people might be wondering, like, so why do you think the quarterback made that decision? Um, I'm obsessed with it. Also, Erin Andrews, I just have to shout out Erin, do you know Erin Andrews?

• 5:10Paige DeSorbo?

  I mean, I don't know her personally, but like, yes.

• 5:12Hannah Berner?

  She's like iconic and has been like that girl.

• 5:15Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, for years.

• 5:17Hannah Berner?

  She's forty-six.

• 5:19Paige DeSorbo?

  Wait, I'm obsessed.

• 5:20Hannah Berner?

  She's gorgeous. She's just running shit. She's the one mill the field at the end of the game that was like,

• 5:26Paige DeSorbo?

  She's the one that like asks them what they're gonna do and then they say they're going to Disney World?

• 5:31Hannah Berner?

  Maybe.

• 5:32Paige DeSorbo?

  She does that every year, yeah. Disney World with the marketing, like what a smart.

• 5:38Hannah Berner?

  Walt Disney actually froze that in his contract.

• 5:40Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, like how'd they get that?

• 5:43Hannah Berner?

  Let's talk about what you want to talk about, which is.

• 5:45Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay, I'm just gonna put it out there. I do think for the Super Bowl specifically, a- and also actually maybe even not just the Super Bowl, there needs to be some type of fashion correspondent for what the boys, what the men are, boys, I was correct the first time. What the boys are wearing because what's going on?

• 6:05Hannah Berner?

  No, wait, some of them, some of them though ate it up.

• 6:09Paige DeSorbo?

  Ate it up. Ate it up with the spoon. Um, I don't want to shock anyone, but Deandre on the Chiefs, walked in with a full mink coat in eighty degree weather and I was like, eh, eh, four plus four, honey.

• 6:19Hannah Berner?

  They were there for the looks, DeAndre Hopkins. I follow that man.

• 6:22Paige DeSorbo?

  Yes.

• 6:23Hannah Berner?

  No, some of them were wearing like Louis Vuitton.

• 6:25Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah. They come in with their bags. I'm like, what'd you put in your, what'd you put in your murs?

• 6:30Hannah Berner?

  Wait, cuz it's funny, it's funny because I saw there's all the correspondents, they put the men, like the big men in their suits, all, I mean, it's the gayest shit I've ever seen, but anyway, it was a drag show.

• 6:44Hannah Berner?

  Like when they were coming out with like all the sparklers and the, it was just, okay, let's just call it what it is. And then Tom Brady had like full contour and everyone was like, this is drag.

• 6:55Paige DeSorbo?

  He was also wearing like a million dollar watch or some bullshit and it was like-

• 6:59Hannah Berner?

  Tom Brady's face card never declines, has never declined in the history. He was stunning.

• 7:04Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 7:05Hannah Berner?

  But I do have to say, it needed a girl somewhere in there to talk about the outfits, cuz also, like when girls show up in outfits at these award shows, we get questions asked, how long did it take you? What did you eat today?

• 7:19Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, what was the story?

• 7:21Hannah Berner?

  Who, what stylist? These guys walk in, no accountability for their outfits.

• 7:25Paige DeSorbo?

  Well, that's what it is. It's zero accountability and that's why they think they can get away with it. And then we have the, and then we have the trickle down effect. So soon we're gonna be seeing Chad in a full 70s outfit out in the bar and we don't need it.

• 7:39Hannah Berner?

  One thing I do hope trickles down? The bell bottom jeans. The bootcut, bell bottom Kendrick Lamar jeans. I wanna see men in middle America wearing that with a straight face.

• 7:51Paige DeSorbo?

  There's nothing I love more than a short king being the villain.

• 7:56Paige DeSorbo?

  You know, it's just like-

• 7:57Hannah Berner?

  Well, when it comes to men, they usually are.

• 7:59Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, that's true. No, that's true.

• 8:02Hannah Berner?

  No, but he's adorable.

• 8:03Paige DeSorbo?

  He's adorable. We'll put him in our pocket. So well executed. I thought it was a great halftime show. SZA is just like, ugh.

• 8:12Hannah Berner?

  Angelic. Wait, can we discuss Travis Kelsey's outfit?

• 8:17Paige DeSorbo?

  I just, I just.

• 8:19Hannah Berner?

  People were doing before and afters, before he met Taylor and after. I personally, I think it's red flaggy. Like whenever, we all know from our end, whenever you look at a phase where you completely changed yourself for a man, you were like, oh, I was going through something.

• 8:36Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 8:37Hannah Berner?

  Granted, maybe this is who he's always been, but he changed himself the last 20 years to pretend he was a white rapper.

• 8:45Paige DeSorbo?

  Right, right. He had a very different swag.

• 8:48Hannah Berner?

  There was actually a funny video saying how like every now and then he tries to dress kind of like swaggy. It's like him revolting against Taylor, but I do have to say, the funniest video of the whole night was he was just wearing his top after the Super Bowl, leaving. And people were like, that was a Super Bowl party winning outfit, like his sparkly shirt and it was giving um, walk of shame after a bad hookup.

• 9:15Paige DeSorbo?

  I would say after Halloween specifically. Like, there's nothing worse than the walk of shame after Halloween, because you're like, okay, well, I'm not a fucking nurse anymore.

• 9:25Hannah Berner?

  There's nowhere this outfit could fit.

• 9:27Paige DeSorbo?

  No, and his was like 70s disco. Also, I don't love a burnt orange.

• 9:35Hannah Berner?

  It was giving porn. I do have to say though.

• 9:38Paige DeSorbo?

  It was giving porn.

• 9:39Hannah Berner?

  People didn't want to say, they didn't want to say the P word.

• 9:41Paige DeSorbo?

  They didn't want to say it because it was a family show, yeah.

• 9:44Hannah Berner?

  And there was must, there was a mustache involved, but I do like that he, look, I like Travis. I don't want to like Travis, but I do.

• 9:51Paige DeSorbo?

  No, I like Travis.

• 9:52Hannah Berner?

  I like him, I like that he commits to the bit. I liked how sad he looked on the field. That kind of turned me on in a weird way, just like him being defeated and empty and sad. I was like.

• 10:03Paige DeSorbo?

  I love all the TikToks of like all the boys like really watching the game and it being like the Barbie song, like. What was I made for? Cause like this is, this is their girlhood, you know, this is their day and, and I, I love to see it.

• 10:19Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, I saw a lot of the like guys being emotional where it showed them like freaking out, but it's like, look, they're just passionate, they're being passionate, just like we are.

• 10:28Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, no, it's, there's something about this Super Bowl that like, it's so cute. I'm like, you guys, you worked so hard and like now is your moment. I loved when the Eagles were winning so, so badly that they put in their second string. And it's like, yes, now they all got to play like, you know, I love that.

• 10:47Hannah Berner?

  No, I, everyone's like dreams are coming true. Like it's very, very cute.

• 10:52Paige DeSorbo?

  Um, I will say this, um, Mads Mitch on who we love on TikTok.

• 10:57Hannah Berner?

  Hysterical.

• 10:58Paige DeSorbo?

  Hysterical.

• 10:59Hannah Berner?

  She's like a little genius, like she speaks so fast and so funny. I have to like slow it down to keep up with her.

• 11:05Paige DeSorbo?

  No, I'm sure she needs to have a, she needs to have a podcast, um.

• 11:08Hannah Berner?

  Does she not? Should we put her on our non-existent network?

• 11:12Paige DeSorbo?

  She would be my first hire for sure.

• 11:15Hannah Berner?

  Okay, you're hired.

• 11:16Paige DeSorbo?

  Hired, um.

• 11:19Hannah Berner?

  She's like, I don't want to be associated with you guys.

• 11:22Paige DeSorbo?

  I literally would never work for you guys. That's an HR violation. And we get it. No, we do. Um, but she did a whole video where she was just like, there's something about, I love that the team that, where the kicker was like, hey, your wife should be in the house. Like lost and the quarterback for the Eagles has an all female like team. Like his agent is like a 35 year old woman who just like fucking crushes. And there was something just about it that I just love it. And there was like an interview with Jalen and he said, they were like, oh, you have like an all female team or something. And he, he kind of was like confused by the question. He was like, well, I just like, I looked for like, who could get the job done.

• 12:03Paige DeSorbo?

  And then like it was them. And he was just like, yeah. And I was just like, oh, I love it.

• 12:08Hannah Berner?

  He's just, he's been nailing it. And he's also like, cause every now and then when I start liking a guy, like an answer, I go, do I like him? Or is he just good looking?

• 12:16Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 12:16Hannah Berner?

  So I stopped, I stepped back and I said, No, I actually did like his answer, but I had to test myself.

• 12:22Paige DeSorbo?

  You did the inner work and you thought, no, I will support a man in this situation.

• 12:27Hannah Berner?

  Someone did say because the kicker Harrison Butler, who I accidentally picked for my fantasy football team because it was automatic and I didn't know and I hope I don't get canceled because of that. And I didn't even have to say it out loud now, but I did. He, because I want to be transparent, he, he said like women shouldn't work and they should have babies. And then his team, I don't think he kicked, maybe he kicked one or two field goals because his team barely scored touchdowns. They were like, oh, maybe you shouldn't work.

• 12:55Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, maybe, maybe you should have stayed home and let her go back to her job.

• 13:00Hannah Berner?

  No, you guys, this wasn't even the beginning of the, okay, this was the beginning of the pod, but like when I tell you our notes are out of fucking control, we had too much stuff going on this week. Um, where do you even want to begin?

• 13:11Paige DeSorbo?

  Wait, I want to begin at, I went to the Christian Siriano show. I sat next to Julianne Hough, which I just like, I never know what to say to like a really famous people.

• 13:23Hannah Berner?

  Because they're either really cool or they have no idea who you are.

• 13:25Paige DeSorbo?

  No, she was, she was so cool, but I like, I was like, I'm not going to sit next to her and not say anything. I just like awkwardly touched her arm. And she turned to me and I was like, sorry, um, that might've been invasive. I just wanted to say like, I'm a huge fan and like, whatever. And she was like, oh my God, thank you so much. And then like three seconds later, she looked at me and she said, your hair is perfect. And I was just like, thank you so much.

• 13:48Hannah Berner?

  Wait, I love that interaction because you, you can do that to someone. Like you can take your little dainty, long, thin finger.

• 13:55Paige DeSorbo?

  I literally.

• 13:56Hannah Berner?

  Daintily put, see if I touched someone, they'd be like, get your hoof off of me. Get your dirty hoof.

• 14:02Paige DeSorbo?

  It was the lightest touch ever. I was just like, excuse me, ma'am.

• 14:06Hannah Berner?

  I could never, I can never, they'd be like, you just punched me in the arm. Ow.

• 14:13Hannah Berner?

  Also, no one's ever turned to me and been like, your hair is perfect.

• 14:20Hannah Berner?

  Wait, so we're going to the Michael Kors show tomorrow? And everyone's nervous, and by everyone, it'd be me. We have to see if Michael notices me this time around. He remembers you.

• 14:33Paige DeSorbo?

  Wait, I have another funny story from Christian Siriano. First of all, I met him for the first time the day before the show because he let me, he like said that he would dress me for the show, so I like went to the showroom, picked something out. And here's the thing about me, if you're working with me, or I like am working with you for something, I'm decisive. Like, you're not gonna spend a lot of time with me. You have shit to do, I have shit to do. I walked into the showroom, he showed me one dress, I said, "I really don't even need to try it on, I know that's the dress. You have things to do, I'm gonna get out of your hair." He was amazing. But I sat next, on the other side of me was, her name is Bronwyn from Real Housewives of Salt Lake City, which I haven't watched this season, but I know that people keep tagging us in things together

• 15:18Paige DeSorbo?

  because we like, she has a bob, and like, if you have a bob, it's just like, you're that girl. So whatever, so we like start chatting, and so we go, and she's lovely. And we go backstage after the show, and she's standing next to me, and I see this woman standing in front of us, and I go, "Oh my god, that's Natasha Beningfield." And like, everything in my millennial body was just like, "Oh my god, that's crazy." And Natasha like turns, and then of course, I'm like, "Natasha, I like, you're the best." Like, "I gotta put, I gotta put, go on sunshine, I ain't gonna lie."

• 15:52Hannah Berner?

  She went, "Please get away from me."

• 15:54Paige DeSorbo?

  And I'm like, "Oh my god, I'm such a fan." She's like, "Oh my god, thank you." And then all of a sudden Bronwyn turns to her and goes, "Hi, I don't know if you remember me, but you performed at my wedding?" And I was just like, "Wait, what the fuck?"

• 16:08Hannah Berner?

  That's some rich people shit.

• 16:10Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, that's some rich people shit. I was like, "Are you fucking kidding me right now?"

• 16:16Hannah Berner?

  Also, I love that she assumed she forgot her. She's like, "I know you do a lot of weddings, you're on the wedding circuit."

• 16:22Paige DeSorbo?

  I'm like, "She's not out here doing bat mitzvahs."

• 16:24Hannah Berner?

  Natasha is out here right now because when I went to the Amy Schumer kind of pregnant premiere, Natasha just walked by us.

• 16:31Paige DeSorbo?

  Which we need to talk about.

• 16:32Hannah Berner?

  Which we need to talk about. Um, side note. The name Bronwyn.

• 16:37Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 16:37Hannah Berner?

  I've never heard this, I as a dumb New Yorker, I've never heard of such a name until it was um Real Housewives of OC. Wasn't there Bronwyn Burke?

• 16:49Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, yeah, there was a Bronwyn.

• 16:50Hannah Berner?

  Bronwyn.

• 16:51Paige DeSorbo?

  Oh, yeah.

• 16:51Hannah Berner?

  I thought, I, is this a common name?

• 16:55Paige DeSorbo?

  I don't know.

• 16:55Hannah Berner?

  In the west coast?

• 16:56Paige DeSorbo?

  I don't, I don't know.

• 16:58Hannah Berner?

  I've never, I've.

• 16:59Paige DeSorbo?

  I've never.

• 17:00Hannah Berner?

  I've never.

• 17:02Paige DeSorbo?

  Why are we European when it comes to anywhere other than the state of New York?

• 17:07Hannah Berner?

  Bronwyn?

• 17:08Paige DeSorbo?

  Wait, I was with a bunch of New Yorkers in New Orleans and no one could say Ben Yeh. I was like, guys, we gotta get it together, okay? They already know we're tourists, we're in all black.

• 17:21Hannah Berner?

  Give me the big nets, the big nets. No, I can't pronounce anything and they can't even pronounce, it's supposed to be like New Orleans? It's not New Orleans.

• 17:32Paige DeSorbo?

  It's not, I do, yeah, New Orleans.

• 17:33Hannah Berner?

  New Orleans. But New Yorkers say New Orleans.

• 17:36Paige DeSorbo?

  It was so fucking hot there.

• 17:37Hannah Berner?

  I bet, well, also, also that's nice, like imagine if it was freezing and then all the football players, their little fingers would be cold.

• 17:44Paige DeSorbo?

  But the game was in a dome.

• 17:48Paige DeSorbo?

  I don't, why is the word dome sexual?

• 17:51Hannah Berner?

  Very sexual.

• 17:52Paige DeSorbo?

  Very sexual, I don't like it.

• 17:54Hannah Berner?

  It was basically the sphere in Las Vegas, which we're gonna perform soon, no, I'm just kidding.

• 18:01Hannah Berner?

  That seems like you have to be high.

• 18:02Paige DeSorbo?

  I literally get nauseous, I think.

• 18:04Hannah Berner?

  You'd have to be high, yeah, talk about the beta, they would have to put beta blockers up your asshole.

• 18:09Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, no, I'd need it in an IV.

• 18:11Hannah Berner?

  So, I get a message of an invite to the Kind of Pregnant premiere, which I was very excited about because Dez goes way back with Ursula Carlson, who's hysterical in it. Um, she's a South African comedian who's like huge and.

• 18:33Paige DeSorbo?

  Wait, who does she play?

• 18:34Hannah Berner?

  She plays the, the dean, not the dean, the, what are they, the one who's vaping the whole time.

• 18:42Paige DeSorbo?

  Yes, yes.

• 18:43Hannah Berner?

  That, I mean, she's seen Stealer, incredible.

• 18:46Paige DeSorbo?

  She's so funny.

• 18:47Hannah Berner?

  So I ask Hailey, not Hailey Bieber, my other best friend Hailey, to come to the premiere and um. We sit down. Jerry Seinfeld's behind us.

• 18:58Paige DeSorbo?

  Stop.

• 18:59Hannah Berner?

  And of course, I'm in the corner and Haley's like closest, so I'm like Haley, I'm gonna need you to shut the fuck up right now and I need you to listen to everything that this man says.

• 19:06Paige DeSorbo?

  And Haley loves to chat.

• 19:08Hannah Berner?

  Haley loves to talk. She quickly forgot I told her that, that she was on observing duty. And then she's like, do you just wanna switch seats with me? And I'm like, no, that's way too obvious. So as we're having this discussion, Chris Rock sits, well, first of all, okay, a woman sits down next to Haley. And she's talking and she keeps talking about her husband, Paul. And she's talking to Jerry Seinfeld. So we're like, okay, who's Paul? So we're, you know, we're doing our girl math or researching. Paul McCartney.

• 19:35Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay.

• 19:36Hannah Berner?

  Paul McCartney. So then we're just, we don't know what to do. And I'm like Haley, don't, whatever you think you're gonna do, don't do, don't do it. Don't do it.

• 19:45Paige DeSorbo?

  Haley just immediately starts singing.

• 19:48Hannah Berner?

  No, like she's, she's also like either, I feel like people, she either says something and people are like, she's the cutest ever, or she'll like trip and fall on her face and everyone will be like, is she okay? Like, she's just always gonna have something. It's never boring with Haley. So I'm immediately like, okay, brace yourself. Then Damon Wayans Jr., who's in the movie, sits in front of us. Then she starts freaking out because apparently she's like the biggest New Girl fan ever. So I'm like, okay, you didn't.

• 20:12Paige DeSorbo?

  New Girl is the best show ever.

• 20:14Hannah Berner?

  It's the best show ever. But like, she, she's not reacting to, did I tell you Chris Rock sits next to us too? So we're, we're in a hot zone, right?

• 20:22Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 20:22Hannah Berner?

  And I'm just like, Haley, just listen to what they say. I wanna hear everything. And she's yapping about, who knows what she was yapping about? Then Adam Sandler walks in. Um, it was a crazy energy. And I never go to the after-party at these things because bitches tired. After a whole movie, like you're ready to go to bed. I go, we have to go to this after-party. I have to support Ursula. So we walk in. Also, I've never met Amy before.

• 20:48Paige DeSorbo?

  Mm-hmm.

• 20:49Hannah Berner?

  And like, as a comedian, you know, she is-

• 20:53Paige DeSorbo?

  The pinnacle.

• 20:54Hannah Berner?

  One of the, she's one of the girls that you put on-

• 20:57Paige DeSorbo?

  She sets the scene for us.

• 20:58Hannah Berner?

  She sets the scene and Trainwreck probably made me want to be a comedian in like, the most, not to be corny, but- It did.

• 21:05Paige DeSorbo?

  No, that's girlhood.

• 21:07Hannah Berner?

  That's girlhood. So, I'm avoiding her, right? As you should. But like, literally going out of my way to avoid her.

• 21:12Paige DeSorbo?

  It's out of respect.

• 21:13Hannah Berner?

  Out of respect. I'm like, I don't want to ruin Amy Schumer's night, so this is her night that I don't, I don't want to be a ruiner. So, we strike up a co- Haley strikes up a conversation with Damon Wayans, obviously.

• 21:26Paige DeSorbo?

  Classic.

• 21:27Hannah Berner?

  So, we're talking to him, um, he's giving me some advice. I make eye contact with Amy across the room. She points at me, and I'm like, "What's happening? What's happening?" We're doing physical comedy. I turn, no, I did like a joke, like, "Me?" I'm like, "Doing things I've never done," you know?

• 21:43Paige DeSorbo?

  You're like, "I'm a physical comedian now. I'm just like, doing this, yep."

• 21:46Hannah Berner?

  Literally. So then she starts coming towards me, and I'm like, "Oh my god, she's coming to say hi to me. She's coming to say hi to me. This is crazy." And then as she's about to say hi to me, this little girl, this little bitchy girl, who, she must have been eight or nine, I think she was in the movie, goes, "Amy!" And Amy turns and starts talking to this girl.

• 22:06Paige DeSorbo?

  And this is why we haven't had kids. Fuck off.

• 22:09Hannah Berner?

  This girl didn't realize, she never, this girl never even saw Trainwreck. Like, that, my dreams came true because of Trainwreck. I literally manifested to try to be a comedian, and this little girl, who doesn't even pay taxes, jumps in front of me, and I'm standing there just like, "Okay," and I'm looking at the girl like, "Are you fucking kidding me, this little bitch?"

• 22:30Paige DeSorbo?

  She can't even work a full 12 hours because it's illegal.

• 22:34Hannah Berner?

  No, she thinks her mom's name is Mom.

• 22:41Hannah Berner?

  So, I wait, I awkwardly wait for that, because obviously I'm not gonna like shove a little girl, but I was thinking about it. I thought about it. Then I was like, "Don't ruin Amy's big day." So then Amy turns to me, and she says something, I don't know, and then I was like, "You, you're the goat," like, that was incredible. And then I get interrupted again by Adam Sandler.

• 23:01Paige DeSorbo?

  I thought you were gonna say Haley.

• 23:10Hannah Berner?

  Haley surprisingly was like actually so good. But um, you know, Adam Sandler comes up, but you know when you're, you shouldn't be in a conversation, but you can't get out? Like cuz of where we were standing, I was way too in where like if I tried to leave it, it would have been awkward. But I'm holding and I don't, I've said three words to Amy and I'm in the middle.

• 23:29Paige DeSorbo?

  You have to like awkwardly smile like and laugh, but you're like, I can't, I'm not adding to this conversation, but I don't wanna take away.

• 23:36Hannah Berner?

  You cannot add, but you, yeah, you don't wanna make it awkward. So I'm standing there in between the two and he's just like, I think he must have assumed that I've like known Amy for a while cuz he was very comfortable with me being in that chat. And I was uncomfortable. I didn't consent to that. And he's looking at her and he's, he produced the movie, so he's telling her like his honest advice and like complimenting her about how well the movie like did in the crowd. And I'm kinda smiling and then he looks over at me and he goes, "Yeah, I heard you laughing." And I was like, "Okay."

• 24:07Hannah Berner?

  Okay, let women take up space.

• 24:09Paige DeSorbo?

  You know my brand of laughter?

• 24:11Hannah Berner?

  It's called giggling.

• 24:14Hannah Berner?

  If you're a giggler, just say it. So then somehow I get out of it, but I'm, then you know when your heart rate's so high, you're like, I've, then I run into some gigglers, obviously, like whoever the prettiest girls are in the room. They're like,

• 24:25Paige DeSorbo?

  Don't they, doesn't it calm you down when you're in a situation like that where you're like, "Oh, there's gigglers here, like I'm safe with them?"

• 24:32Hannah Berner?

  No, they went up to me, they're like, "Hannah, we're so excited to meet you." And I go, "Guys, hold my hand, I'm not okay." And they were like, "What happened?" I'm like, "Amy Schumer just talked to me." And then we're like crying, we're holding each other. And then like these teachers, one woman was a teacher, someone else, she played tennis, they start talking to me and she's like, "By the way, we're Amy Schumer's like childhood friends." So I'm freaking out. But again, I've, I feel like avoiding Amy is just like the best thing you could do in these situations. Like she already said hi to me, like we, we did great. I've never been to one of these parties, but a circle starts to form.

• 25:08Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay.

• 25:09Hannah Berner?

  Like a dance circle.

• 25:10Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 25:10Hannah Berner?

  And that's when I started looking at Haley. I said, "Don't you dare."

• 25:13Paige DeSorbo?

  No, yeah.

• 25:13Hannah Berner?

  Haley's a dancer.

• 25:14Paige DeSorbo?

  Haley's, yeah. She's a triple threat. She'll get in there and she'll sing and she'll dance and she does the thing. She's, she's open to go to, going to your bachelorette party. You guys can hire Haley.

• 25:26Hannah Berner?

  She should be hired.

• 25:28Paige DeSorbo?

  She's a value add, okay?

• 25:32Hannah Berner?

  Honestly, always gets five stars wherever she goes, five stars. But also like I've never seen a circle form and felt calmness. Like, it's like a laxative. Like, I'm like, I'm freaking out.

• 25:45Paige DeSorbo?

  I actively back away. I'm like, I can't add anything to this.

• 25:48Hannah Berner?

  No, Haley and I fully back away and I get my camera to show like, I'm not in this, I'm filming it. Like, let me be the filmer.

• 25:53Paige DeSorbo?

  I'm background.

• 25:55Hannah Berner?

  I'm a journalist. At this point, I'm a hired journalist.

• 25:58Paige DeSorbo?

  I'm stage crew, okay? I'm not, I'm not talent right now.

• 26:02Hannah Berner?

  I'm the P A. If anyone's a snack, I'll bring it.

• 26:05Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 26:06Hannah Berner?

  So Amy like jumps in the middle and she does a funny dance, then like some SNL guy, Alex Moffett, does a whole dance. And it's like starting to slow down and Erzil is looking at me. And Haley starts whispering and she's like, "Do the worm." And I was like, "Are you trying to get me canceled in this town?" I'm barely getting accepted by the cool kids of comedy.

• 26:25Paige DeSorbo?

  I'm barely getting by.

• 26:26Hannah Berner?

  I'm barely getting by. Adam Sandler just made fun of my laugh. Like, I am teetering here.

• 26:30Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 26:31Hannah Berner?

  I just want to get out of here with no one going home being like, "Did you see what Hannah did?" Like, that's all I want.

• 26:37Hannah Berner?

  Can we talk about that?

• 26:38Paige DeSorbo?

  I'm just trying.

• 26:41Hannah Berner?

  I'm trying to not be a conversation in the Uber going home.

• 26:45Paige DeSorbo?

  Wait, no, that's literally my whole life right now. I'm just like, as long as I can escape and not be a conversation after the fact, I'm good.

• 26:56Hannah Berner?

  But I do have to say, the reason we both did reality TV is because for some reason, we can't not, we can't not be the drama.

• 27:01Paige DeSorbo?

  Actually, I have another thing to say.

• 27:03Hannah Berner?

  Hold my beer. So then Erzil is looking at me and also Erzil easily could have just been looking at me, but in my head, I was like, "She wants me to do the worm." Because as I'm telling this story, I'm like, she never actually said do the worm.

• 27:17Paige DeSorbo?

  That is so fucking you. It's, oh my god.

• 27:22Hannah Berner?

  I was about to throw Ursula under the bus and be like, well Ursula forced me. And I'm like, Ursula, I don't think she even knows I do the worm.

• 27:28Paige DeSorbo?

  That is us in any situation when a hot guy walks by, Hannah will be like, he's trying to fuck. Like, he literally works here.

• 27:39Hannah Berner?

  No, I have a whole thing made up in my head. And then, um, but this is the thing, Amy looks at me and she does a point. Again, looking back now, I don't think she meant do the worm. Maybe she meant like, do you want to do something silly in the, in the circle?

• 27:52Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 27:53Hannah Berner?

  And as you know, like, I'm zero a hundred, babe.

• 27:55Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 27:55Hannah Berner?

  But like, it's all or nothing with me. Okay, like, yes or no? Yes or no?

• 28:03Paige DeSorbo?

  Here's the thing, this is why, again, you can't do drugs. Peer pressure, it gets to ya. You're, you are the easiest person to peer pressure. It's so crazy. Like, you could be adamant that you're not doing something and one person is like, just try it. And you're like, okay.

• 28:21Hannah Berner?

  But you know what's so cute about my friends? And when I say friends, I speak this very generically, like literally every friend I've known since college has never forced me to do cocaine. Because I also think they're scared. They go, we don't want that kind of night.

• 28:35Paige DeSorbo?

  It's not.

• 28:36Hannah Berner?

  Do you realize no one's ever, like?

• 28:38Paige DeSorbo?

  No one's ever asked you.

• 28:39Hannah Berner?

  No one who knows me has ever looked me in the eye and been like, you should do cocaine to meet me in the bathroom? No fucking way. To the point that I didn't even know people were doing cocaine.

• 28:49Hannah Berner?

  Years later, I'm like, people take cocaine and fuck?

• 28:51Paige DeSorbo?

  I'll never forget the time you called me after being at a party and being like, I think they were doing drugs.

• 29:01Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, it's 3 a.m. in New York City, like, look alive.

• 29:05Hannah Berner?

  I call Paige and I go, I don't want to start to spread drama or gossip. I don't want to ruin anyone's reputation. They went to the bathroom and they were there a little too long. And I don't think it was a tummy ache.

• 29:15Paige DeSorbo?

  And they came out and all of a sudden they had crazy amounts of energy.

• 29:19Hannah Berner?

  So long story short, Amy looks at me, does a point. When I tell you this circle was like Ted Sarandos was there, if you don't know who Ted Sarandos is, he like runs Netflix. Like he's the guy that like, if he doesn't like you, like, you'll never work in this town again. So I go in, do the worm, and everyone's like, you did it in your dress. And I'm like, have you seen the Giggle Squad tour? I've, I've done it in the most insane outfits. So I do two, because I feel like three, you're like, you're getting greedy.

• 29:48Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 29:49Hannah Berner?

  Like three, it's like, we get it, you can do the worm. So I did two, like as if it was a mistake almost, like I tripped almost and did the worm. Run off, people have footage, which I think I'm gonna put in the newsletter, because I don't want it to make, like I very, you know when you watch, you watch yourself and you're like, oh my god, I'm annoying. Like I was-

• 30:05Paige DeSorbo?

  All the time.

• 30:07Hannah Berner?

  So I run to Amy after and she's like, yay. And then I run behind her and just stand there.

• 30:12Paige DeSorbo?

  Like it was your mom and you're-

• 30:14Hannah Berner?

  Literally, I was like, are we good? Is everyone, are we still okay? Is anyone mad at me? Um, and then I told Haley, I was like, we have to leave.

• 30:25Hannah Berner?

  So I literally did the worm.

• 30:27Paige DeSorbo?

  Anxiety like immediately hit and you're like, I gotta get the fuck out of here.

• 30:31Hannah Berner?

  I'm completely sober, like completely sober. Arguably, maybe it was good because I was sober, because I was like, we need to leave. Because if I was drunk, I'd be, I'd be like, so Amy.

• 30:41Paige DeSorbo?

  What'd you think of the worm?

• 30:43Hannah Berner?

  Watch, watch Kind of Pregnant. I did the worm at Amy's premiere for the gigglers.

• 30:47Paige DeSorbo?

  I watched it, it's so good.

• 30:49Hannah Berner?

  There's a lot of slapstick comedy that like, honestly, I'm not huge into the slapstick stuff. I almost like pissed myself in the movie theater.

• 31:01Paige DeSorbo?

  Well, Amy can do a bit, you know, like the back and forth is so good with all the characters.

• 31:06Hannah Berner?

  I also, I had Inside Scoop from Damon Wayans Jr. He told me that she was legit doing her own stunts. Like apparently she fell down the stairs like eight times.

• 31:14Paige DeSorbo?

  That's so you.

• 31:16Hannah Berner?

  No, it's my dream.

• 31:17Paige DeSorbo?

  No, it's literally your dream. Wait, can I also say the other lead, um, Brienne Howie, I love her. She's in Jenny and Georgia.

• 31:25Hannah Berner?

  She's so good in it. She's gorgeous.

• 31:28Paige DeSorbo?

  She's gorgeous. When I did the red carpet for People's Choice, I was so nervous. And she was like one of my first interviews and when she was walking toward me, I like made a face as if like I knew her and was like, oh my God.

• 31:42Hannah Berner?

  Cause you watched Jenny and Georgia.

• 31:44Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, I loved Jenny and Georgia. And so when she came up, I was like, oh my God, I'm so sorry. Like, I don't know you, like, but I'm Paige, whatever. She was so nice to me that it literally like eased my anxiety on the red carpet. And this was before I knew about beta blockers. So I was like so nervous.

• 32:02Hannah Berner?

  Wait, can you, can you believe you did that without beta blockers?

• 32:05Paige DeSorbo?

  No, no, no. Now I can't even go to a social event without a fucking beta blocker. I like pass them out to my friends. I'm like, pop this.

• 32:18Paige DeSorbo?

  This episode of Giggly Squad is brought to you by McDonald's. The Quarter Pounder with Cheese with Fries and a Drink, now for $8 for a limited time only. You know, I love getting McDonald's after a Giggly Squad live show and we're going on tour again, which means my QPC order is about to be amazing, my Quarter Pounder with Cheese. The Quarter Pounder with Cheese uses 100% fresh beef cooked right when you order. No artificial flavors, colors, fillers, or preservatives. It's hand topped with onions and two slices of cheese arranged in a star for that cheesy goodness in every bite. And lastly, perfectly placed pickles side by side. I absolutely love McDonald's and for a limited time only, prices and participation may vary.

• 33:00Paige DeSorbo?

  Prices may be higher in Hawaii, Alaska, and California and for delivery. Fresh beef not available in Alaska and Hawaii, offer not valid for delivery.

• 33:09Hannah Berner?

  The Columbia Amaze Puff Jacket is so iconic because I feel so encapsulated and warm, but it's so light.

• 33:16Paige DeSorbo?

  Great use of encapsulated. I went whimsical. My jacket is the Tea Light Pearl Shine and it really does give Tea Light Pearl Shine.

• 33:25Hannah Berner?

  It gives it.

• 33:26Paige DeSorbo?

  It's sunny.

• 33:27Hannah Berner?

  Honey. And mine's black.

• 33:30Paige DeSorbo?

  Because sometimes in the winter, you just see all the same colors. And I'm like, okay, but let me throw like a galosh on with my puffer coat and let me have it be fun colors.

• 33:40Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, because you like a coat to be part of the outfit.

• 33:42Paige DeSorbo?

  It's the outfit.

• 33:43Hannah Berner?

  Not ruining the outfit. But also, I hate when you put on coats and then you're like stiff. You guys, I literally could swim in this.

• 33:50Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, it feels like it's light, but it's also extremely warm.

• 33:54Hannah Berner?

  It's not overpriced.

• 33:56Paige DeSorbo?

  No.

• 33:56Hannah Berner?

  And we love giving the Giggler's a good deal. And it has space for layering. Like, you don't feel like it's tight, so I can layer a lot.

• 34:03Paige DeSorbo?

  Which is very important, because there's nothing worse than like layering and you're stiff and then you're sweating and it's like a cold sweat and it's like, no. And I love that it has these things for your hands, because I really use them with my thumbs. I love when jackets have this.

• 34:17Hannah Berner?

  So cute. And they have all different length options for what you prefer, depending on how long your torso is. Visit columbia.com to get your hands on an Amaze Puff Jacket.

• 34:27Paige DeSorbo?

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• 35:08Paige DeSorbo?

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• 36:03Hannah Berner?

  Well, the Grammys happened right after we recorded last time. I just had one question for you on a like-

• 36:07Paige DeSorbo?

  Oh, I literally didn't watch anything of it.

• 36:11Hannah Berner?

  I watched all of it, but I've already forgotten. Except the jellyfish hair.

• 36:18Paige DeSorbo?

  What the fuck is that?

• 36:20Hannah Berner?

  So it's like Miley Cyrus, Lady Gaga, a bunch of girls are doing this bang that like cuts across. Billie Eilish. It cuts across, um.

• 36:30Paige DeSorbo?

  Again. Leave it to the Brits. I don't think. I don't think that we-

• 36:37Hannah Berner?

  No, leave it to, unless you're a British rock star.

• 36:40Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 36:41Hannah Berner?

  I mean, they could, look, those girls can pull it off. I'm just telling the girls at home.

• 36:45Paige DeSorbo?

  I, I, I don't need to be a sea creature. You know, I've got enough problems. I don't need to have a jellyfish hair.

• 36:52Hannah Berner?

  We're drowning every day.

• 36:53Paige DeSorbo?

  No, I'm trying to stay afloat every day. I'm gasping for air at all points. Wait, one other thing. I just had like, I feel like it's just a pack filled-

• 37:08Hannah Berner?

  I know.

• 37:09Paige DeSorbo?

  Like weekend, like I'm just, I had so much fun. Um, Friday I did, Cassie David came out with the movie called I Love You Forever. It's so good and like, I didn't realize like, it's an independent film. Like her and her best friend from college wrote it and, and they like premiered it. I did like a little like moderation after with the actors. I'm obsessed with her, like on a different level. I just like, it's so rare to like meet people, especially like in your 30s and just be like, hey, like, I'd like to be your friend. And like, we kind of did that to each other without like being weird. Like, I was like, hey, like, if you like wanted to hang out again, like, I would like be down with it.

• 37:50Paige DeSorbo?

  Um, I met her and her, or I hung out with her and her sister and they're just like so cool and pretty and like, I love being around hot, funny, talented women. Like, it just makes me feel like I'm doing something right in my life where I'm like, you've have, you have a career and I love it. You know, it's like so good.

• 38:13Hannah Berner?

  I do have to say, in my twenties, I did not de-center men. I'm gonna be so, I'm gonna be so honest with you guys.

• 38:20Paige DeSorbo?

  I changed, I changed my fashion for them, you know?

• 38:23Hannah Berner?

  You Travis Kelce'd.

• 38:24Paige DeSorbo?

  No, that's crazy.

• 38:25Hannah Berner?

  I literally was like, for me to feel value, I want to be with a hot, tall, smart, funny man, and then I will feel complete. I'm at this weird point in my life.

• 38:38Hannah Berner?

  I mean, granted, yes, I am married and I will address that and that is so nice. But to feel, and I need to call myself out on that because I pretend I'm not married, but I am. But I do have to say my fulfillment right now is like, I want people to see me and who I hang with and be like, oh my God, she hangs with the smartest, coolest, hottest, most successful girls. And it's this weird thing that happens. I think in your twenties, we're all very scared. But in my thirties, whenever I see a hot, smart, successful girl, instead of thinking like, like jealousy vibes, I'm immediately like, how do I, how do I make her talk to me? Like, I literally become creepy. Like, how do I connect with her? Because I want her in my circle of influence.

• 39:22Paige DeSorbo?

  I so believe that saying where it's like you are the sum of the five people that you surround yourself with. And I, and I only really believe it because if you do look back at your twenties and like your mood and what you were doing and look at like who you were hanging out with. It's completely different, like.

• 39:42Hannah Berner?

  Yeah.

• 39:43Paige DeSorbo?

  Now in my 30s, like, I love cutting a bitch out. Like, I love, like, walking away and being like, "You do not fulfill me. You're also not up to my standards." Like, I just, like, no, I don't want to be associated with you.

• 39:56Hannah Berner?

  I used to have friends who would, like, definitely put me down a lot. And I thought it was funny and I would lean into it because I'm, I'm self-deprecating, but then I realized, like, oh no, they actually are, like, holding me, like, suffocating me down.

• 40:08Paige DeSorbo?

  Keeping you underwater. Holding you underwater.

• 40:10Hannah Berner?

  Drowning me jellyfish style.

• 40:12Paige DeSorbo?

  No, why is this, why is this episode water-based?

• 40:18Hannah Berner?

  This is a water-based lubricant for your vocal cords. You can laugh with us.

• 40:22Paige DeSorbo?

  Why is this underwater-themed?

• 40:26Hannah Berner?

  Wait, it cuts to us just wearing goggles the whole episode.

• 40:31Hannah Berner?

  We're so stupid.

• 40:33Paige DeSorbo?

  No, I know. Why? Because we haven't talked in, like, four days.

• 40:36Hannah Berner?

  No, I know.

• 40:37Paige DeSorbo?

  I also feel like we're talking really fast.

• 40:39Hannah Berner?

  I know. I don't, I think, I was gonna say I drink a lot of coffee, but it's literally 7:00 PM and I'd be lying. Um, but no, I really am obsessed with, I want people to be like, "Oh, she's so cool. Look at her friend." And I know there was, like, in high school, people were like, "Oh, popular." I'm not talking about popular. I'm talking about, uh, this bitch's brain next to me is fascinating and, and she thinks big and she sees me. Like, I don't know. It's just friendships, ooh. Like, you deserve to be with someone you're excited to be friends with.

• 41:10Paige DeSorbo?

  Here's the other thing I've realized. Like, I feel like women and people always talk about, like, oh, well, they, like, they have to be jealous of each other and they have, like, there's so much jealousy with, like, girl, like, between girls. I'm gonna let everyone in on a secret. Not when you're independently successful. Like, when Kazzy asked me to moderate her panel, in what world would I be jealous that she put a movie out? I was like, "Oh, my fucking god, how sick. I would love to be involved in your, like, prosperous career. Like, I would love to support you."

• 41:48Paige DeSorbo?

  Also, the movie that she put out is so, I think so important, especially when, because like we talked about being in like an abusive relationship. It's about an abusive relationship, but it's about a mentally and emotionally abusive relationship. And I feel like there's so many movies out there where it's like, it's so extreme and it's like, oh, you're only in an abusive relationship if it's physical, which is so not true. Mentally, it can be so draining. Like someone that's just like constantly-

• 42:17Hannah Berner?

  You're not sure. You're always like, is it me? Am I the, did I deserve that? So it's not as like clear.

• 42:23Paige DeSorbo?

  I just think it's such a good message for young girls and like adult women too. Like when I say young girls, I mean like early twenties dating. But like in your thirties too, like I watched it and I was like, oh yeah, that is fucked up when someone does that to you.

• 42:40Hannah Berner?

  Also, side note about like finding friends who are like really cool, smart, funny, successful. A lot of these women I found have also been through something. So I just want to shout out anyone going through something right now because it means, like I just realized a lot of things I went through. If I didn't go through them, I literally wouldn't be where I am now. And I would not be as interesting. Like I'd be boring as fuck. I'd have no lore. I'd have, I'd have no lore. Can we, can we focus on creating lore for yourself? Whenever anything fucked up happens, go, the lore, the lore that people are gonna be talking about.

• 43:13Paige DeSorbo?

  No, I, I feel like I feel the same way. Like I truly don't regret like anything in my twenties or like anything. Because I'm like, wait, that changed me as a person. That like helped me get to where I am right now. Like my perspective is different.

• 43:31Hannah Berner?

  The only thing I regret is when I'm too hard on myself. Cause looking back, you're just like, okay, girl, you were trying. I'm trying, you're trying your best. You just need to drink some water. Um, wait, shout out to my mom. She made me laugh so hard. Cause Dez has been gone. He's been in Dublin. So my mom swooped. Like she was like, your husband's not home. You're hanging with mom and dad. And I was like, hell yeah. As long as someone's getting dinner, you know? So we go to get dinner and my dad orders one of those like fish spaghetti dishes, you know? Where it's like angel hair with a ton of clams and scampi and-

• 44:11Hannah Berner?

  Whatever it is.

• 44:12Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 44:13Hannah Berner?

  Um, and he starts eating it with the little fork that you're supposed to put in the clam.

• 44:20Paige DeSorbo?

  Mm-hmm.

• 44:21Hannah Berner?

  And he starts like eating the pasta with it.

• 44:25Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay.

• 44:25Hannah Berner?

  With the little fork.

• 44:26Paige DeSorbo?

  Mm-hmm.

• 44:27Hannah Berner?

  And my mom looks at me and she goes, I have the ick.

• 44:30Paige DeSorbo?

  No.

• 44:33Hannah Berner?

  I, the way I'm a-

• 44:34Paige DeSorbo?

  Normally is getting the ick from your husband.

• 44:36Hannah Berner?

  Literally, because he's using, and he's like, oh, it makes me like eat slower when I use the little fork. And I'm like, that is for the muscles.

• 44:43Paige DeSorbo?

  He's literally Cher from Clueless. He's like, if I cut it up into little pieces, you're skinnier.

• 44:49Hannah Berner?

  Chewing it and spitting it out. I'm like, dad, what are you doing? And then I'm sitting there, my mom's rolling her eyes, I'm dying laughing. I just think like, it just made me so- My mom says so many like things that we would say on Giggly Squad and it just makes me really happy. And then I tried to pitch her, because she was on, she went on Burner Phone with me last week, we did one on karma, you guys should listen. And she was like really good and I was like, should you and Kim start a Giggly Mom podcast?

• 45:14Paige DeSorbo?

  Wait, it should be a podcast where they just recap what we talked about the previous week and say like their opinions on it.

• 45:21Hannah Berner?

  I do, they do that anyway, and then they just call us.

• 45:24Paige DeSorbo?

  They just do it in our, in our frickin' text messages. Um, do you ever, sometimes, this is gonna sound like a little mushy, do you ever like sometimes think about your life and like, like in a way where you're proud of yourself and then you get emotional because you're like, oh, my mom taught me to be like that? And it's like, I would have ne- I wouldn't be like this. Like, my mom has called me so many times like over this past like couple of months or like whatever and just been like, I'm so fucking proud of you and like your demeanor and like how you, like what you say and how you stand up for yourself. And I will like get emotional because I'm just like, wait, but like you taught me how to be like that and that's so sweet. Like, I'm just obsessed with them.

• 46:08Hannah Berner?

  Also, you don't even know the, like, they didn't even teach you, it's just who you are.

• 46:11Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 46:12Hannah Berner?

  Can I say something, like a really sad thought I thought about?

• 46:15Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay.

• 46:16Hannah Berner?

  About parents?

• 46:18Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 46:19Hannah Berner?

  I think it should be illegal for like if they're over fifty

• 46:24Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 46:25Hannah Berner?

  To have to um interview for a job. Cause I was just envisioning like my mom or my dad in a job interview and like getting rejected and like how like, sorry, that's my mother. That is my father. You cannot see. He's perfect. They are per- they raised me. You don't think they're capable of this job? Like, I'm sorry, imagine someone telling your dad no. Like, I know your dad is an entrepreneur, but imagine someone interviewing your dad and being like, sorry, you're not good enough for this company. I will burn your small business to the ground.

• 46:56Paige DeSorbo?

  No, there's something, this is why I'm actually scared for us to become moms, because I feel like I'm gonna be vicious. If someone's rude to my parents or like does something to them, I'm like, I literally always say, she better hope she never fucking runs into me. Like, there's no one I wanna stick up for more than my mother and my father. Like, I I feel like they actively are like, don't let Paige find out about this. And don't, don't let me know about it.

• 47:26Hannah Berner?

  See, it's funny, cause I'm not the Scorpio in my family. Um Dez is the Scorpio. So if any, if Dez finds out anyone, my mom, my dad, anyone's upset, he has it handled. So shout out to Dez, our provider, our protector.

• 47:41Paige DeSorbo?

  Like so.

• 47:43Hannah Berner?

  But what I did tell myself, if I'm gonna be a parent and my kid goes through something or something fucked up happens, we have to normalize adversity. Let your kid have adversity.

• 47:54Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 47:54Hannah Berner?

  I'm going, honestly, I'm leaning towards the eighties model. Let him, let him figure it out.

• 47:59Paige DeSorbo?

  Let him go.

• 47:59Hannah Berner?

  Mama's napping.

• 48:00Paige DeSorbo?

  Come home and the streetlights come on.

• 48:02Hannah Berner?

  Exactly. Cause I feel like we were the helicopter parents where they like made sure everything was perfect. And it's like, obviously, you know, there's pros and cons, but I'm kinda like, you're doing chores.

• 48:14Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 48:15Hannah Berner?

  You're, when something bad happens, I go, and that's life.

• 48:19Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, we're picking ourselves up.

• 48:20Hannah Berner?

  We're picking ourselves up, and then they're stronger, cuz you don't wanna have a kid who's spoiled, or who, have you seen, I've been on Mom Talk for no reason? I'm not pregnant, I swear, I just ended up on Mom Talk somehow.

• 48:31Paige DeSorbo?

  No, I very much grew up with a mom that was like, and suck it up. And a lot of the men out here did not. Like, there are so many times in my life, I wanna look at the men and be like, suck it the fuck up.

• 48:43Hannah Berner?

  I do have to say, it's so, people talk about like, meeting the parents, and like, obviously, you want the parents to like you, but even more so, you wanna see like, how they parent him, cuz like, you just need to have similarities in that, or like, there's a lot of people, you're gonna meet so many people who you are attracted to, or you have chemistry with, but like, you're not gonna parent a child well together, you're not gonna have day to day, like, financial decisions to get, like, there's so many things that make people good boyfriend-girlfriend, that doesn't make them good husbands. The Columbia Amaze Puff Jacket is so iconic, because I feel so encapsulated and warm, but it's so light.

• 49:24Paige DeSorbo?

  Great use of encapsulated. I went whimsical, my jacket is the Tea Light Pearl Shine, and it really does, give Tea Light Pearl Shine.

• 49:33Hannah Berner?

  It gives it.

• 49:34Paige DeSorbo?

  It's honey.

• 49:35Hannah Berner?

  Honey, and mine's black.

• 49:38Paige DeSorbo?

  Because sometimes in the winter, you just see all the same colors, and I'm like, okay, but let me throw like, a galosh on with my puffer coat, and let me have it be fun colors.

• 49:47Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, cuz you like a coat to be part of the outfit, not ruining the outfit. But also, I hate when you put on coats, and then you're like, stiff. You guys, I literally could swim in this.

• 49:57Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, it feels like it's light, but it's also extremely warm.

• 50:02Hannah Berner?

  It's not overpriced.

• 50:03Paige DeSorbo?

  No.

• 50:04Hannah Berner?

  And we love giving the Giggler's a good deal. And it has space for layering, like, you don't feel like it's tight, so I can layer a lot.

• 50:11Paige DeSorbo?

  Very important, because there's nothing worse than like, layering, and you're stiff, and then you're sweating, and it's like, a cold sweat, and it's like, no.

• 50:17Hannah Berner?

  No.

• 50:17Paige DeSorbo?

  And I love that it has these things for your hands, because I'm... I really use them with my thumbs. I love when jackets have this.

• 50:25Hannah Berner?

  So cute. And they have all different length options for what you prefer depending on how long your torso is. Visit Columbia.com to get your hands on an Amaze Puff Jacket.

• 50:35Paige DeSorbo?

  It's tough on cold, soft on you.

• 50:38Speaker 05

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• 51:05Speaker 04

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• 51:34Speaker 06

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• 52:04Hannah Berner?

  Have you heard about the Japanese electric salt spoon?

• 52:09Paige DeSorbo?

  Jesus, that sounds terrifying.

• 52:13Hannah Berner?

  It's not a vibrator.

• 52:16Paige DeSorbo?

  It hugs you from behind.

• 52:18Hannah Berner?

  Code giggly.

• 52:21Hannah Berner?

  No, so, okay, this, this spoon, there's something electric about it that

• 52:26Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay.

• 52:27Hannah Berner?

  it makes everything taste saltier, but you don't actually add salt. So if you have like high sodium, it just like, they're on another level.

• 52:35Paige DeSorbo?

  The Japanese live in a thirty twenty-five. I mean, I sometimes get on Japanese TikTok, the shit they have in their houses. I'm like-

• 52:43Hannah Berner?

  They're fixing problems I didn't even know we had.

• 52:47Paige DeSorbo?

  Wait, that's a great way to put it. I'm like, wait, that is a horrible task and you guys don't even think about it. Like, how did you-

• 52:54Hannah Berner?

  We didn't even know that needed to be fixed.

• 52:56Paige DeSorbo?

  Right. No, they're, they're truly ahead of their time. It's crazy. Can we get it? Like, have you seen it? You've seen it on TikTok?

• 53:04Hannah Berner?

  Yeah. I also, we have a lactaid event tomorrow. Shout out Lactaid. And I was making, I thought it'd be cute to make a banana split for a promo video. And I couldn't get it to like, you put a banana and you put the ice cream on it. I couldn't get it to stay. And people in my DMs were like, Hannah, you're supposed to cut the banana in half, you dumb piece of shit. So-

• 53:25Paige DeSorbo?

  You know, I'm gonna say something. I've never been a fan of the banana split. Because I just think it's, it's messy. Like, I saw it as a child and like, my clean girl aesthetic was like, you're doing a lot.

• 53:37Hannah Berner?

  Not on brand for you. No.

• 53:39Paige DeSorbo?

  It's so not on brand. I'm like, you're mixing-

• 53:41Hannah Berner?

  Give me a vanilla cupcake with a little pink frosting.

• 53:44Paige DeSorbo?

  I'm like, you're mixing three colors? Get out of here. Like, no.

• 53:48Hannah Berner?

  Also, the textures are all over the place. I more prefer like a brulade fruit. If a fruit's gonna be involved, let's make it warm.

• 53:55Paige DeSorbo?

  What's a brulade?

• 53:57Hannah Berner?

  You know, like, I mean, I'm probably, I didn't go to French culinary school, but I feel like it's, when you put-

• 54:03Paige DeSorbo?

  Wait, is that a thing?

• 54:05Hannah Berner?

  French culinary school?

• 54:06Paige DeSorbo?

  No, brulee. Oh, like a creme brulee?

• 54:10Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, you know how they brulee it with the fire? Like, you gotta brulee.

• 54:14Paige DeSorbo?

  I never realized that's what it's called.

• 54:16Hannah Berner?

  Well, now I have to Google it because I know there's like a fifty percent chance I'm wrong. Is that Daphne in the background?

• 54:22Paige DeSorbo?

  Yes.

• 54:23Hannah Berner?

  Brulee banana. Br- banana brulee. Okay, it's a thing.

• 54:27Paige DeSorbo?

  Oh, okay.

• 54:28Hannah Berner?

  I was so wrong. I think you have to put sugar on it or something. No, like, I'm, people don't know that- I'm a chef.

• 54:34Paige DeSorbo?

  Do you know that my mom actually has one of those little mini torches?

• 54:37Hannah Berner?

  Of course she does.

• 54:40Paige DeSorbo?

  Of course she does. By her night side bed stand in case anyone tries to fuck with her. No, um, she hasn't brulayed in a while, but she can. She can brule all around.

• 54:51Hannah Berner?

  Did she tell you I got her flowers?

• 54:53Paige DeSorbo?

  She did. That was so sweet of you.

• 54:56Hannah Berner?

  No, I do have to say, what was so funny about it was she'd messaged me. She was like, these flowers are perfect for my house. Cause all I did was order the flowers. I knew you would like, cause I know it's an all white aesthetic and I got it like a little gold, a little white. It was perfect. So I was, I feel like I got Kim points there. I was really happy about that.

• 55:17Paige DeSorbo?

  No, that was so sweet of you.

• 55:18Hannah Berner?

  Points for me. Did you watch Apple Cider Vinegar?

• 55:23Paige DeSorbo?

  Hannah.

• 55:24Hannah Berner?

  Did you watch the whole thing?

• 55:25Paige DeSorbo?

  Yes.

• 55:26Hannah Berner?

  How? I feel like it's a show that like, it's meant for both of us.

• 55:29Paige DeSorbo?

  No, literally when you texted me, I was like, okay, yeah, I actually have nothing to watch right now.

• 55:35Hannah Berner?

  Where do we begin?

• 55:36Paige DeSorbo?

  Where do we begin? Okay. It's on Netflix. You guys have to watch it. It's six, six episodes. It's about this um, Australian girl who basically like tried to single white female. This influencer who was a like health influencer because she had cancer. She was trying to like heal herself naturally. It just so proves how like on the internet, people will say anything for sympathy because it's just like comments, comments. Like this girl literally lied and said she had brain cancer.

• 56:07Hannah Berner?

  This girl lied and some Aussie, we have a lot of Aussie gigglers. They were DMing me saying like, when it first came out that she might be like lying and she was raising all this money for charity for other people with cancer. This like kid who needed surgery and the money never got to them. So they wrote up that she's basically like not putting the charity money where it should be. And apparently all of Australia was like, how dare you try to bring a woman down? This cannot be true. We love her. She's perfect. Leave her alone. And then it came out.

• 56:36Paige DeSorbo?

  Lying the whole time.

• 56:37Hannah Berner?

  About brain cancer. Cause she told everyone to buy her cookbook and her app. Cause she basically said, my diet healed cancer. And it was very interesting also in this day and age, kind of because yeah, the internet is so crazy. Where this other girl is basically, you know, she did some research about, you know, some. Cold place where you go and you drink juices and your cancer goes away and like obviously we all want to solve things. But it just showed that there's so much misinformation online.

• 57:09Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 57:10Hannah Berner?

  And like, and granted, there's so much fucked up stuff with the healthcare industry. But you, we have to trust that like, we're trying to cure cancer and there isn't like a secret weed that you can put up your pussy that's gonna do it.

• 57:25Hannah Berner?

  Cause if there was, hopefully we'd know what it was. So, the documentary is coming out.

• 57:29Paige DeSorbo?

  Oh, fuck yeah.

• 57:30Hannah Berner?

  Next week.

• 57:31Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah. On Netflix too, or somewhere else?

• 57:34Hannah Berner?

  On Netflix, on Netflix. So we are hooked in, we-

• 57:36Paige DeSorbo?

  And that's the girl that played Anna Delvey.

• 57:40Hannah Berner?

  No.

• 57:41Paige DeSorbo?

  No.

• 57:41Hannah Berner?

  But it looks just like her. And you know what I thought? I thought she probably was up for that role and she would've been great as Anna Delvey. Her name is Caitlin. Debbie, I believe. Caitlin Debbie. She was in Booksmart also. She's fucking amazing. I don't think she's Australian.

• 57:55Paige DeSorbo?

  Oh, well she did a perfect Australian accent.

• 57:58Hannah Berner?

  But I also could've made that up.

• 57:59Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay. And we'll fact check that-

• 58:01Hannah Berner?

  Cause you know what? Actually, she might be and she's just been American in every other movie.

• 58:07Paige DeSorbo?

  And it could be that too.

• 58:08Hannah Berner?

  Do you know who's not American?

• 58:10Paige DeSorbo?

  Who?

• 58:11Hannah Berner?

  Isla Fisher.

• 58:13Paige DeSorbo?

  I think I knew that.

• 58:14Hannah Berner?

  She's Australian.

• 58:15Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 58:17Hannah Berner?

  How did you know that?

• 58:18Paige DeSorbo?

  I always thought that Isla Fisher, and I thought Isla Fisher and Amy McAdams were the same person for a very long time.

• 58:23Hannah Berner?

  Maybe that's why I thought she was American. No, Isla Fisher, that's crazy. Like that's cra- Australian people do not get enough praise for their American accents.

• 58:33Paige DeSorbo?

  No, they don't. They have, I mean Margot Robbie is Australian. Let's take a moment of silence for them.

• 58:40Hannah Berner?

  The pod just becomes one long moment of silence.

• 58:44Paige DeSorbo?

  Each week, I think we do need to do a moment of silence for people. Because like, we need a, they need a-

• 58:51Hannah Berner?

  They do.

• 58:52Paige DeSorbo?

  They need thoughts and prayers.

• 58:54Hannah Berner?

  We're quiet. Let's be quiet. Um, okay, I have one final note.

• 58:58Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay.

• 58:59Hannah Berner?

  I wrote my college EDU address ruined my life.

• 59:03Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay.

• 59:04Hannah Berner?

  You didn't go to college? No, I'm just kidding. Did you have a college EDU address?

• 59:09Paige DeSorbo?

  Um, yeah. Yes, I had an email at the college I attended. Everyone's always trying to act like I didn't fricking go to college. Guys, I went, I had an email.

• 59:20Hannah Berner?

  She went to Jimmy Fallon's college.

• 59:22Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 59:23Hannah Berner?

  Shout out St. Rose, which that my cousin went to also. It's true. I was just fucking with you, but um.

• 59:28Paige DeSorbo?

  What was your college email?

• 59:31Hannah Berner?

  It was [email protected] for Wisconsin. And that's what I used for like my Facebook and my Apple ID and my everything. And then no one tells you that after college, you have to change it because they shut it down. So like, I went years not being able to log into my Apple ID because it was EDU and like I couldn't get into it to change it.

• 59:56Paige DeSorbo?

  And now we know why you don't believe in Bluetooth or wifi. You were traumatized.

• 1:00:02Hannah Berner?

  And that's the pipeline.

• 1:00:02Paige DeSorbo?

  And you were like, fuck all of this.

• 1:00:04Hannah Berner?

  That's the pipeline.

• 1:00:05Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 1:00:07Hannah Berner?

  And I don't believe in mail.

• 1:00:09Paige DeSorbo?

  No, you don't. No, no, I get that. I think mine was just sorbo P some numbers. At St. Rose.edu.

• 1:00:18Hannah Berner?

  How many justorbo Ps were there at your school with 500 students?

• 1:00:24Paige DeSorbo?

  You never know.

• 1:00:26Hannah Berner?

  You know what? No, independent schools shout out because you get more attention for people who need it.

• 1:00:31Paige DeSorbo?

  Yes. You get individualized attention where they say, we don't think this is for you.

• 1:00:37Hannah Berner?

  How many classes did you skip?

• 1:00:39Paige DeSorbo?

  Never, never skipped class. I was not a class skipper.

• 1:00:43Hannah Berner?

  Really?

• 1:00:44Paige DeSorbo?

  Well, because I was like, if I skip one, I'm never coming back. You literally, I'll get a taste of that freedom and I'll never see my face again.

• 1:00:52Hannah Berner?

  That's me with smoking cigarettes. That's me with cocaine.

• 1:00:56Paige DeSorbo?

  That's how I felt about school. I'm like, you guys, you know me too well.

• 1:01:02Hannah Berner?

  Oh my God. I slept through most classes, which is our brand. Um, but I was there.

• 1:01:07Paige DeSorbo?

  No, I even would do like early classes so that I was like done by like one o'clock. I was a different person. I don't know who that.

• 1:01:13Hannah Berner?

  Do you know that nowadays kids just chat GPT the lesson plan?

• 1:01:17Paige DeSorbo?

  I mean, I feel like I was doing that years ago too. I was ahead of my fricking time.

• 1:01:23Hannah Berner?

  Um, you guys, wow, that was a lot of information.

• 1:01:27Paige DeSorbo?

  Wait, what an action-packed hour.

• 1:01:30Hannah Berner?

  We've never done so many things and tomorrow we're, we're going to-

• 1:01:33Paige DeSorbo?

  I feel like Kevin Hart in The Rock. I think we just, oh my god.

• 1:01:38Hannah Berner?

  It's giving, um, what's her name? The Wizard of Oz girl. Who starred in The Wizard of Oz?

• 1:01:46Paige DeSorbo?

  Ariana Grande?

• 1:01:47Hannah Berner?

  No.

• 1:01:50Hannah Berner?

  Julie, what's her-

• 1:01:53Paige DeSorbo?

  Julie Andrews. No, what's her name? What is her friggin' name? You were just talking about her.

• 1:01:59Hannah Berner?

  I'm trying to do a callback.

• 1:02:01Paige DeSorbo?

  Why do I keep, I keep thinking of the most insane people? I want to say Cyndi Lauper. No. Um, it's on the tip of my tongue. What is her name, Hannah? Judy Garland!

• 1:02:14Hannah Berner?

  We fucking Judy Garlanded ourselves this week.

• 1:02:16Paige DeSorbo?

  No, I need to take a beta blocker.

• 1:02:20Hannah Berner?

  We love you guys so much. Thank you for giggling. We'll go with you later. Bye.

• 1:02:32Speaker 04

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• 1:03:16Speaker 04

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